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CONTENTS AUGUST 17, 2016 VOL40 NO09
26 06 RESPECT FOR PROPERTY RIGHTS NEGATES THE “TRANSGENDER BATHROOM” DEBATE 10 DAVE MONTEZ HEADS FOR DC 14 YOU CAN PICKLE THAT 16 THE SOUTHERN-FRIED MAJESTY OF KIRK’S SOUL KITCHEN
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18 PLATED + CELEBRATED: COLORADO’S JACK-NGRILL 21 VINNY’S ON TOWER 28 VIVA COLOMBIA! 34 HEINZESIGHT 37 DUELING WITH DEPRESSION: KILL IT WITH KINDNESS 42 ASK A SLUT
ON THE COVER
Longmont Dairy home delivery milk + donut // photography by Paul Wedlake
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SERVING THE LGBT COMMUNITY OF THE ROCKY MOUNTAINS SINCE 1976 PHONE (%("),,")%%% FAX 303-325-2642 WEB OutFrontOnline.com FACEBOOK /OutFrontColorado TWITTER @OutFrontCO INSTAGRAM /OutFrontColorado FOUNDER PHIL PRICE 1954-1993 ADMINISTRATION info@outfrontonline.com JERRY CUNNINGHAM Publisher J.C. MCDONALD Vice President MAGGIE PHILLIPS Operations Manager JEFF JACKSON SWAIM Chief Strategist EDITORIAL editorial@outfrontonline.com BERLIN SYLVESTRE Editor RYAN HOWE Digital Content Manager BRENT HEINZE Senior Columnist CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Chris Arneson, Paul Bindel, Evelyn Franco, Mike Halterman, Kelsey Lindsey, Wesley Smith, A.J. Smuskiewicz, Vanessa Williams, Greg Wheeler, Yvonne Wright, Mike Yost, The Cycle Sluts ART art@outfrontonline.com TRISHA HIMMLER Art Director NADYA LYAPUNOVA Graphic Intern CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS Charles Broshous, Wesley Smith, Scott Webb, Paul Wedlake, FreePik.com MARKETING + SALES marketing@outfrontonline.com DUSTIN KRIER Director of Sales & Marketing TOPHER LA FLEUR Marketing Executive KELSEY NOLAN Marketing Executive NATIONAL ADVERTISING Rivendell Media 212-242-6863 | sales@rivendellmedia.com DISTRIBUTION
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PERSPECTIVES
RESPECT FOR PROPERTY RIGHTS NEGATES THE “TRANSGENDER BATHROOM” DEBATE UNTIL THE DEMOCRAT PARTY AND ITS LIBERAL-MEDIA allies took up their latest “civil rights” cause of “transgender bathrooms,” I, as a proud crossdresser/ transvestite, was never afraid of using the ladies’ room. But now that many people with traditional values have been worked into an outrage by yet more heavy-handed government intervention into the private affairs of American citizens and businesses, I fear that I might get assaulted by a Bible-toting suburban housewife condemning me as the spawn of Satan if I were to enter the Walmart restroom that matches the clothes I’m wearing. Media commentators are frequently preaching about transgender rights regarding bathroom access and other sensitive topics these days, but they seem not to understand the complexity of the “transgender community” they seek to defend. I have a great deal of personal experience in this matter, as both a crossdresser/transvestite and a freelance writer specializing in sexuality/gender issues. I realize that “crossdresser” and “transvestite” are now considered politically incorrect terms, even though they are much more precise than “transgender” in describing someone with my particular fetish: I’m a heterosexual guy who gets turned on by wearing skirts, pantyhose, and heels. That’s substantially different than a transsexual, who actually wants to be, or considers himself/herself to be, the opposite sex. But neither journalists nor politicians apparently have the time or mental capacity to consider such distinctions… If you’re a guy in a dress, they want the government to force businesses, schools, churches, and other institutions to let you use the ladies’ room. And the idea of forcing businesses to do this is the source of all the social upheaval over the ridiculous matter of what room I’m supposed to step into when I have to take a pee or poo. Once the government steps in with me, people are going to get pissed off— because you are stripping away their own personal values, ideas, and freedoms. 6
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PROPERTY RIGHTS I’ve been crossdressing in public for more than six years. I am not “passable.” And I live in, and go out for fun in, a lower middle-class blue-collar suburban area. Still — contrary to media stereotypes of such communities — I’ve almost always been treated with respect. Why? Because I don’t force myself on other people, and I always show respect for their beliefs.
A.J. Smuskiewicz
We live in a culture where the public has been conditioned to believe there’s a political and governmental solution to everything.
It comes down to the basic libertarian principle of property rights. He or she who owns the property sets the rules. After I strut my obviously “crossdressy” stuff into a bar, store, or other establishment and have to use the restroom, I always ask a representative of the establishment which restroom they prefer I use. I try to ask the owner or manager, but if they’re not available, a bartender, bouncer, sales clerk, or other employee will do. And at the scores of establishments I have visited, all but one have told me to use either the ladies’ room or the bathroom of my own choice. Only one club makes me use the men’s room, and I’m cool with that. Honestly, that is probably the restroom I should use, because I’m a man! But when I’m all dressed up, the temptation to use the women’s facilities can be strong because I’m living out my female fantasy.
I’ve encountered a few little problems. In one bar, a woman complained about me using the ladies’ room, but the owner defended me because I had asked her permission first. In another bar, I was in the ladies’ room after having obtained the bartender’s permission, but then some other guy who worked
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there got upset about it and came knocking on the bathroom door yelling at me to get out or else he would call the cops. So I promptly finished my business and immediately and angrily left the bar. That was the only time I got angered by the situation — because I had been told conflicting things. A couple bars told me I was not welcomed as soon as I walked into the place — we never even got to the subject of restrooms. But I was cool with that, because at least they were up-front with me from the start. And I took my business elsewhere. Diversity of viewpoints. The world should be big enough for us all.
working things out with the private establishment. And if you don’t like what you are told by that establishment, leave and go somewhere else. You might experience a rare problem once in awhile, but deal with it using your common sense and wisdom. Another option would be to make all bathrooms and showers and dressing rooms everywhere unisexual. Right? No, I don’t think society is ready for that — not as long as most men are men and most women are women.
DIFFERENT TYPES OF TRANSGENDERS Of course, my perspective is that of a transvestite, and it may differ from that of a transsexual, who rightly feels more entitled to use the ladies’ room. I know my non-op transsexual friend Keilany gets very upset when she is told she has to use the men’s room. And I agree that true transsexuals have every right to use the bathroom of their choice — but, as I previously suggested, I don’t think that same right necessarily applies to crossdressers like me. Now, most knowledgeable people will admit that there are a lot more transvestites than transsexuals among so-called transgenders. So who exactly do the enacted or proposed bathroom laws apply to? In addition, many people are struggling with their gender identity and are simply confused as to what they really are. Until I was in my early 50s (I’m now 56), I used to incorrectly think that I might be transsexual. Should a young child who thinks he or she might be transgender at an age before his or her sexuality has even developed be allowed to use the restroom or shower of the opposite sex — causing confusion and concerns for the rest of the school? I do not think so. So what should the government do about this complicated and sensitive social issue? Should it pass laws forcing business and schools to adapt bathroom, shower, and dressing room policies that apply equally to fundamentally different types of people, including transvestites and transsexuals and males who, on any given day, might feel like wearing a skirt? Or, alternatively, are we going to start requiring IDs or results of psychological evaluations to use the bathroom, so that the government bathroom police can verify your legal and/or diagnosed gender? I think both options are undesirable and inappropriate — and silly. The best option remains the individual
THINK AND ACT FOR YOURSELF We live in a culture where the public has been conditioned to believe there’s a political and governmental solution to everything. So the Democrats want to force businesses and schools and other establishments to let all M2F transgenders or people who think they’re transgender use the ladies’ room, while Republicans want to force all M2F transgenders, even those who are genuine transsexuals, to use the men’s room. I say screw both political parties! Do it the libertarian way. Have respect for yourself as an individual, and have respect for the property rights of businesses. Work it out between the two of you in your own way. Don’t force things on people. Let them follow their own values, but maybe you can help encourage those values to move in a certain direction through your own respectful behavior. Then perhaps people will surprise you with their friendliness and acceptance toward you, and you will both learn something valuable about human nature and civil social interaction in the process.
Agree? Disagree? Feel free to pen a response to Editorial@OutFrontOnline.com 8
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legal Directory
how to choose the rIghT PerSOnAl Injury ATTOrney HERE ARE FIVE TIPS THAT CAN HELP: Experience. The value of an attorney’s experience will come in handy when assessing and investigating a claim. Hiring a personal injury attorney who knows what to look for, where to look for it, and how it applies to your case can make a big difference. Specialization. Just like doctors specialize in certain areas of medicine, lawyers usually specialize in certain areas of the law. An attorney that specializes in personal injury has a unique set of skills that will help determine issues of liability such as negligence and causation. Reputation. When it comes to resolving your claim fairly and expeditiously, look for an attorney with a positive reputation in your
community. Selecting an attorney that has a good reputation will go a long way in dealing with insurance companies and the other attorneys handling your claim. Personality. When you’ve been injured, you want an attorney that values the importance of being available to take questions, update you on the status of your claim, and return your calls in a timely manner. Personality is often the most overlooked factor in selecting an attorney, but it can be a good indicator of how they operate their business. You are going to be spending a good amount of time with them, so you want to make sure you like your attorney and trust that your experience is going to be a good one. Patience. As you go through the hiring process, remember: There is no need to rush the process. Selecting your attorney is an important step, and you can take your time to do it right so you’re confident that your claim will be in good hands and handled with the care it deserves.
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The opinions expressed in this article are general in nature. For specific legal advice about your particular situation, please contact an attorney.
outfrontonline.com/legal-directory | To advertise here, please call 303-477-4000.
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DAVE MONTEZ HEADS FOR DC FAREWELL TO ONE OF THE BEST ADVOCATES CO’S LGBTQ COMMUNITY HAS EVER SEEN
In case you weren’t aware, Dave Montez is one of the go-to guys when crisis in our state’s LGBTQ community arises. Until a few weeks ago, he was the executive director for One Colorado, a political advocacy organization that specializes in raising awareness for LGBTQ issues around the state. He’s marched on the steps of the State Capitol, through her halls, and addressed our lawmakers more times than some people have even ridden past the gold-domed house of legislation. And all the while, followers he garnered as the head of the beloved non-profit walked by his side, empowered by the man of great hope and unprecedented leadership. That’s our Dave, and it’s bittersweet to see him go. “A mentor told me a long time ago that that’s the best time to go,” he responds. “When it’s still bittersweet.” He adds that he couldn’t be more confident in the team he leaves behind. “I was a difficult decision to leave but it was made possible by my complete and total faith in the leadership skills of the board and the staff [of One Colorado]. I wouldn’t have left if I didn’t think there was a really, really great team in place to carry on the work.” When he announced he was leaving, the team was a mix of sadness, surprise, and understanding. “They’ve always been supportive,” he says. “They’ve been thoughtful and warm about the departure, and I’m really appreciative.” Just last week, Daniel Ramos, the former deputy director of One Colorado, was appointed the interim director. In the meantime, Dave will be saying his goodbyes to as many people and coalition partners as he can and penning his farewell memos. “The Ally Awards is my last day,” he reveals. “I will always care about One Colorado. If ever there is a need for me to help in some capacity, I will make myself available.” Because he’s not moving to DC 10
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until late December, he’ll be based here in Colorado and, according to One Colorado’s website, will act as advisor for the organization.
Berlin Sylvestre
But Dave’s given so much to the LGBTQ community here that sadness is to be expected. According to Dave, though, it’s time to move on and to honor another side of what makes him who he is — his Latino roots. Dave will be the new director of the Latino Engagement Fund at the Democracy Alliance in Washington DC, a group that makes sure progressive plans for the Latino community get resourced from national contributors in order to implement forwardthinking legislation at the state level. In particular, he’s focusing on getting Latinos — who comprise nearly 20 percent of the American population — to vote consistently and use their political power to improve their lives. “It’s an opportunity to work with another community I deeply care about and use some of the skills I’ve developed to help advocates on the ground continue to such incredible and often under-funded work,” he declares. And what are the issues he plans to tackle in DC? He rattles them off with such ease that you know they’ve been on his mind for quite awhile. “An increase in a living wage,” he says instantly. “There’s so many Latino families that are struggling, working two or three jobs. The erosion of voting rights in many places is incredibly problematic — it
PHOTO // COURTESY OF DAVE MONTEZ FACEBOOK PAGE
HE STEPS INTO THE COFFEE SHOP, LEAN, HANDSOME, youthful. An easy smile works its way across his face when we greet and his eyes are as luminant as always — a tell of his conviviality and ability to put people at ease. It’s not my favorite kind of interview, these farewells, but it’s always nice to see Dave Montez.
is a basic, constitutionally protected right; we should be making it easier for people to vote, not more difficult. Immigration reform at the state and federal level, obviously. Education is incredibly important to the Latino community, making sure that Latinos like myself are able to go to college if they want to. I would not be sitting where I am right now had it not been for Pell grants and subsidized student loans. My family didn’t have money to send me to college. They gave me a lot of, ‘You can do anything you want, you can be anything you want to be’ [support], but there was no money there. I didn’t have a college fund.”
One Colorado
These are such fundamental things that it’s hard to believe we’re having to fight for them in 2016’s America. He says that during this election season, in the time of Trump, we need to stay focused and remain positive. His style is cool, diplomatic. “The Boogeyman isn’t always going be the best motivator,” he says of the GOP presidential nominee. “People want to vote for hope, for a better future, improved lives — they want to vote for their families, so our message can’t just be about how terrible Trump is; it has to be about continuing the legacy that President Obama worked so hard to build for this country.” Dave’s dark eyes are alight with passion and resolve. “The work’s not done,” he tells me. “We have to remember that as we’re motivating people to vote. We can’t just have an anti-Trump message; we have to give people something to vote for.” He takes a sip of hot tea, not rattled in the slightest that we’re in an unusual election season that’s signaling the rise of the right. “These people aren’t going away,” he says, shaking his head. “They’re not new; we’ve always had to battle [them]. But I’m definitely a pragmatist. I believe there’s more common ground than not with opposing viewpoints and perspectives. That’s something I’ve worked hard to build into One Colorado. Part of our jobs as advocates is to meet people where they are on their journey of acceptance, and walk with them. I hope to bring that to the table in my future role.” (See what we mean about Dave? The guy isn’t scared of the opposition — he invites them on walks.) He says nearly half of eligible Latino voters are millennials. “Often, the people who are most anti-Latino are also the exact same people who are anti-LGBT. All the research and data on millennials shows that they don’t see LGBT as separate from Latino, separate from gun control, from choice. It’s impossible to separate Latino from LGBT; it’s OUTFRONTONLINE.COM
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PHOTO // COURTESY OF DAVE MONTEZ FACEBOOK PAGE
all connected. So millennials see what many advocates have known for a really long time: We’re stronger when we work together.” Perhaps his cool demeanor is a reason why the 38-year-old executive looks like a millennial himself. “I find it funny that we’re using the word ‘Rolodex,’” he confesses after I ask him about bringing contacts from home to DC. “We’re really dating ourselves with that!” We belly-laugh like the late-30-somethings we are, and a few heads turn our way. No bother. “But I don’t want to overplay any cultural tipping point,” he tells me, getting back to the business of the progress we’ve made under President Obama. “Orlando is a stark, stark reminder and very sad reality that there are people who really don’t like our community, that don’t like the progress we’ve made, who will work to undo that. While we’re making progress, we have to be careful not to lull ourselves into complacency.” He mutes his ringing phone without even seeing who’s calling, never breaking eye-contact with me. I ask about his leadership style and he laughs a bit. For this question, he seems to think a little longer, as though he’s never been asked. And then: “I try to take in as many perspectives as I can before I make a decision, to bounce as many big ideas off of the people who are going to execute them for a reality check on what is possible and what is not possible.” He’s always under the pressure of “not saying the wrong things” and learning how to “parse words” in just the right way, and he admits there’s an added pressure involved when taking it to a national level. Thing is, he’s nailed it here in Colorado and we hope the humble guy gives himself the credit he’s due. He never seems to pat himself on the back for all he’s done during our interview, which is a rare quality in interviewees in executive positions, I must admit. “One of the reasons I operate the way I do is that I grew up in a family with very few resources, so if I wanted to go on my senior trip or to senior prom, all of my family had to chip in,” he says, eyes softening. “None of us had the resources to make it happen individually.” He scoots his chair a little closer. “That really stuck with me, and is why I view everyone as one instrument in a broader orchestra. When we play together and harmonize, we produce something incredible — more than what one instrument could produce on its own. That is something that has shaped my leadership style and one that I will carry with me.” I can’t help but be touched with epiphany. “We are always better when we listen to each other and plan together,” he smiles. That’s our Dave. 12
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SO ON BEHALF OF OUT FRONT MAGAZINE, I’D LIKE TO END THIS PIECE WITH AN OPEN LETTER OF SORTS AND IT GOES SOMETHING LIKE THIS: To the Montez family, immediate and extended: You’ve done such a wonderful job raising this wonderful man and powerhouse of an advocate and leader. On behalf of Coloradans who’ve benefited from his hard work and boundless vision for the future of Americans — Latino, LGBTQ, and beyond — thank you for everything you’ve done in raising this man. To the Latino Engagement Fund and the Democracy Alliance: You made the right decision, and congratulations are in order for all involved. Be good to our guy, yeah? We’re watching you! And for Mr. Montez himself: The footprint you leave on the LGBTQ landscape of progression and visibility in our state, and your tenacity to bring our community’s needs into the halls of our Congress are gifts we’ll never be able to repay you for. In your wake, you leave many, many thousands of grateful citizens and a team of people who’ve learned what it means to lead the charge toward equality and justice. We wish you only success, though we needn’t worry too much about that. Knock ‘em dead, man. We’re all rooting for you here at home.
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You CAN Pickle That: An Invitation to the World of Food Preservation PAUL BINDEL
Sweet + Spicy Pickles (inspired by Emeril Lagasse)
3lbs pickling cucumbers in ¼-inch slices 2 c sliced red/white onions ½ c pickling salt 6 c water 3 c white vinegar 1½ c apple cider vinegar 3½ c sugar 2 tbsp yellow mustard seeds ½ tsp turmeric ½ tsp of celery seed 4 whole cloves 10 tbsp roughly chopped garlic 24 chile de arbol peppers
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We
live in an age of mass refrigeration, surrounded by what writer Nicola Twilley calls the artificial cryosphere, the chain of machines that keep food cool from farm to truck to store to table. Before refrigerated semis were a thing, the easiest way to extend food’s life was by mixing it with a combination of sugar, salt, fat, vinegar, or alcohol. (Side note: Foodways of the past were not inherently healthier.) If fridges and freezers have made food preservation irrelevant, why do it? Because it’s fun! Food preservation connects you to others, from the friends helping you process veggies, to the microbes turning barley-juice into beer. It also teaches you impressive skills, techniques that were once only the purvey of chefs, housewives, or craftsmen. It also immerses you in unique world flavors with recipes like nuka, kimchi, dhosa, or tej.
New to preserving? Start out with pickles and jams for an easy win. You’ll need a large pot for boiling, a medium pan for mixing the ingredients, a set of tongs for gripping the jars, a funnel (the wider the stem the better), a ruler, a towel, canning jars, lids, and tightening bands. Buy a kit with all these supplies, or just borrow them from an aunt or neighbor. The good news is that canning a relatively safe activity (unless you’re my mother who insists that pressure canners kill people). The bad news is that sanitation is still an issue. Microbes like people-food, and some of them (like botulinum and listeria) aren’t so kind to our bodies. The canning process, when done correctly, eliminates pathogenic microbes in three ways: first, it heats the food to a temperature that kills many microbes currently in the food, second, it vacuumseals the food so that it doesn’t
come into contact with future microbes, and third, it creates an acidic environment that limits microbial growth. (Vinegar, for instance, is essentially a microbe desert, which is why it’s such an excellent cleaning product.) Your MO throughout the process should be to keep your hands, utensils and jars clean. Follow the recipe closely when it comes to vinegar, water, and sugar proportions, as they have been calibrated to maintain a shelf-stable pH. Fridge pickles or jam allow you to be more freewheeling, but they don’t keep as long, which (ahem) defeats the purpose of preserving. Whatever recipe or method you choose, the important thing is that you enjoy it. Give yourself an afternoon to complete the process. Most importantly, stop drinking out of Mason jars leftover from your hipster wedding, and fill them with delicious food.
Mix the water, pickling salt, cucumbers, and onions in a large bowl, and let them sit for two hours to flavor the vegetables and draw excess water. Drain and set the vegetables aside. Place your jars, lids, and bands in a large pot and cover with water. Bring to boil for at least fifteen minutes, sanitizing them completely. (hint: while the water heats, chop your vegetables) Over a saucepan, bring the vinegars, sugar, spices, and peppers to a boil, stirring to ensure the mixture is blended. Add vegetables and bring it to a simmer. Remove from heat. Jars should still be hot from sterilization (you didn’t forget them, did you?). Add the mixture to the jars, leaving half an inch of headspace. Clean the rims, add lids, and screw on the bands hand tight (not too tight or the jar will burst). Place jars in a hot-water bath for 15 minutes. Remove and cool at room temperature (you will hear a satisfying pop!) Over time, the vegetables will absorb all the flavors, so allow them to age for at least two weeks before cracking them open. It’s worth the wait. OUTFRONTONLINE.COM
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chicken + a glass of cold red Kool-aid // SOUL KITCHEN / KirksSoulKitchen.com Right: Street tacos + mushroom salsa, all prepared fresh and inhouse // 100% DE AGAVE / 100deAgave.com
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PHOTOS // PAUL WEDKALE
Main: Crispy fried
The Southern-Fried Majesty of Kirk’s Soul Kitchen Vanessa Williams
DENVER ISN’T EXACTLY A HUB OF SOUL FOOD places. If you’re looking for a dose of mom ‘n’ pop soul food deliciousness, make your way over to Kirk’s Soul Kitchen off Colfax in Aurora. The restaurant is just up the road from University of Colorado’s Anschutz Medical Center. It’s not a big, fancy establishment, but it serves up quality food that tastes like home cooking. You can call in an order for take out or dine in. My go-to meal is something smothered with their hella-good gravy, macaroni and cheese, and collard greens. You might be tempted to say no when they ask you, “Do you want that smothered?” Don’t play yourself — you didn’t go to a soul food restaurant to count your macros. The correct answer is yes. Yes, I would like that smothered. I personally am a big fan of ordering meatloaf and pork chops — I mentioned smothered, right? Both are absolutely delicious, but if I had to pick, I’d go with the meatloaf, a classic comfort food. (My mother doesn’t live in town so I try to get my meatloaf where I can.) It comes with two slices, and is a perfect consistency. The flavor combo with the gravy is the perfect blend of savory and not-too-peppery. If you’ve never had collard greens, first of all, what are you doing with your life? Second, I highly recommend trying them. The key to good greens is just the right amount of seasoning and cooking them to a perfect level of tenderness. Kirk’s delivers with what I consider the best collards I’ve had in the Denver Metro area. They’re made with smoked turkey and seasoned for the gods. I could order just greens and be totally satisfied.
I always at least want to order the macaroni and cheese wherever I go. But as any mac-lover knows, sometimes it’s an utter disappointment. Kirk’s is creamy and delightful. I am a fan of both baked and creamy varieties, but when it comes to a creamy mac, this one is definitely a favorite. It reminds me of one of my mother’s recipes. When it comes to soul food, of course your meat is usually the main entrée, but I’m all about the sides — they make or break the experience. There is also an option of a dinner roll or cornbread. I didn’t come to a soul food restaurant to NOT eat cornbread. The first time I had Kirk’s cornbread, I hesitated because I am deeply offended by sugary, cake-like cornbread and I didn’t want to be bitter about it. But I took the chance and was delighted to find that it is actual cornbread! I was so eager that I crumbled it (again this isn’t that cakey BS) but it was so good, I just got a spoon and finished it off. I have a goal of eating every single thing on the menu. I don’t even live in that area, but it is a great reason to head up East Colfax, and I plan to do it every chance I get. For some standout menu items, I recommend the cabbage with bacon, and southern-style okra with shrimp. There are also other staple sides like rice (smother it) and mashed potatoes (smother it). If you feel like really diving in, get the shrimp etouffee. It packs plenty of flavor and you will not be disappointed. A visit to Kirks’s is nothing short of a great time and a full, happy belly. The staff here is almost as sweet as the peach cobbler. (They don’t come smothered, though.)
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Plated & Celebrated: COLORADO’s Jack-N-Grill IN 1994, JACK MARTINEZ AND HIS FAMILY BEGAN SELLING HOMEMADE green chili to a handful of Colorado customers. From there, the family expanded to catering to local car dealerships. This led to selling authentic New Mexican cuisine on weekends from a 4-foot propane griddle. 22 years later, Jack-N-Grill is a local institution with three restaurants, thousands of faithful customers, and national recognition. The LGBT community has flocked to the Highlands’ flagship restaurant on 26th and Federal since it opened in 2000. You can find everything here from their 7-pound breakfast burrito challenge to their more manageable green chili cheeseburgers made with fresh, all-natural ingredients. Anna, the family matriarch, still oversees much of the preparation and cooking using family recipes that go back generations. In 2009, The Travel Channel ranked Jack-N-Grill 13th on America’s Top 101 Tastiest Places to Chow Down. This is the same year Adam Richman of Man Vs. Food fame failed to finish the burrito challenge that has won others a picture on the restaurant’s Wall of Fame, a free meal, and if — you’re a woman — free meals for life. I mean, it’s only five pounds of hash browns, a dozen eggs, a half-pound of ham, a half-pound of cheese, and a few vegetables! What I love about Jack-N-Grill is there is something for everyone. The menu offers fresh meats, fish, vegetarian, and gluten and carb-free options. Their portions are huge, their prices are reasonable, and their chili is to die for! I get everything smothered in “Christmas Chili” — half red and half green. We begin every meal there with chips and guacamole salad. The guacamole is piled high with surrounding garnishes like onions, tomatoes, and cilantro 18
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Yvonne Wright that can be mixed in or eaten separately. The corn and flour tortillas are all made fresh in-house. The menu offers a variety of burgers named after family members — and there’s a lot of family! The number of burgers seems endless. They have burgers in sopapillas, burgers with bacon and chili, burgers in egg-battered chili rellenos, and one of my favorites, “The Juarez” — a hamburger patty with ham, a split hot dog on top, then covered in fresh green chili, cheese, mayo, and (of course) guacamole. The burgers are so good, Jack-N-Grill made its way into the Food Network Magazine’s 50 States, 50 Burgers “Best Burger in Colorado” issue. Budget-friendly items include $2 breakfast burritos to go with ten varieties to choose from. And these are not just beans and cheese. You can choose from breakfast burritos with tender pork carne adovada, crispy chicharrones, chorizo — just about any combination you want. Full meals include their signature “stacked” enchiladas, New Mexico Frito Pie, gorditas, chimichangas, chile rellenos, posole, burritos, fajitas, and tacos, all made in the authentic New Mexican style. The restaurant also offers catering for parties or other gatherings. My personal favorite is the “naked burrito” — mouthwatering carb-free beef, chicken, or pork concoctions with as many additions as you want (beans, cheese, sour cream, and/or guacamole). The best part is there’s so much left over, I get two (or even three) meals for the price of one. I’ve been eating here since before The Food Network and the Travel Channel discovered them. I suspect I’ll be going back for many years to come. It’s a family business that makes everyone feel like family.
SUPER CIRCUIT SATURDAY The superhero edition of Circuit Saturday was held at Tracks Nightclub on August 6th. Hundreds of caped crusaders, masked avengers, and loyal sidekicks packed the makeshift Hall of Justice to battle the forces of evil, get their grooves on, and enjoy the musical stylings of deejays Blaque Gurl, Sean O’Grady, and Nina Flowers. Photos by Charles Broshous
AURORA
Meet Aurora! This little lady loves treats and going for walks. She can be a little shy at first and would do best in a quiet home where she can be reassured. Come meet this sweet girl today to see if she’s your match.
SCOUT
Meet Scout! She’s an adorable dog who’s ready to meet her new family. She does well on the leash and has a mellow and sweet personality. She’s lived well with dogs in the past and loves to be pet. Come see if she’s your match!
Wag ’N Trail – Noon , 2016 // 8AM September 17 easy 1.6an y usiasts enjo endale Gl Outdoor enth their dogs at mile hike with stle Rock to Ca of rth no ace Farm Open Sp iends League r the Dumb Fr raise funds fo strations fee, gi re . With your t photo and Buddy Center en recieve an ev end participants ur-legged fri u and your fo iser. ra treats for yo nd fu ll fa r la at this popu ec St 2080 S. Queb | rg .o DDFL 2 77 1-5 75 ) (303
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Main: Street tacos + mushroom salsa, all prepared fresh and in-house // 100% DE AGAVE / 100deAgave.com Right: A spinach + kale salad topped with chicken, bacon, bleu cheese, and egg. // VINNY’S
PHOTOS // PAUL WEDKALE / WESLEY SMITH
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Vinny’s on Tower
Wesley Smith
I’M A SUCKER FOR AN UNDERLIT BAR WITH LOTS OF DARK wood and TVs that don’t scream. Imagine my relief upon moving here to find that the Green Valley Ranch area (near DIA) has a great spot just like this down the road. Though Vinny’s bills itself a sports bar (quietly), it doesn’t really give off the “clink beers with your noisy frat brothers” vibe. There are multiple TVs you can watch from any angle at the bar (and from the many booths that run alongside it), but the volume is blissfully low, letting you hear your lunch/dinner guests without having to lean in and go, “What? Say that again!” The food is typical American fare (burgers, wings, salads) with a few curveballs thrown in (a Monte Cristo sandwich, pot roast, and fish tacos for instance). We’ve never had bad service, either, but we’ve typically gone on weeknights. However, we got swept up by a bucket (or three) of good brews one evening and found ourselves surrounded by a rousing karaoke show. (We did some drunken No Doubt, of course, and people sang along.) The crowd was really mixed and everyone (young and old) was really supportive of everyone who took the mic. Great crowd to accidentally party with, I won’t lie. For the record, Saturday nights at 9pm is Vinny’s karaoke. There’s a killer digital jukebox there if you wanna control the ambiance. They have everything from 60s classic rock to brand-new The Weekend, and it pumps through a sound system that’s nicely set up.
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They recently underwent a remodel, so the place is really clean. Vinny’s is split into two sides: the bar is on one, and a quieter, more subdued dining room is on the other. There’s a daily happy hour that includes $2 draft Coors Lights and $1 off all house wines and well drinks. As well, all DIA employees get 20 percent off their entire bill by presenting a DIA badge. Would I recommend Vinny’s? Sure, perhaps for a laid-back meal with a buddy. VinnysBarandGrillAtDIA.com
1045 N. Lincoln St., #305 | Denver, CO R E A SONABLE R ATE S | PAY MENT P L ANS | F REE C ONSULTATIONS OUTFRONTONLINE.COM
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BAR TAB 1076 Ogden St., Denver (303) 860-8353 barricudasdenver.com
B LUSH & BLU 1526 E. Colfax Ave., Denver (303) 484-8548 blushblubar.com
BOYZTOWN 117 Broadway, Denver (303) 722-7373 boyztowndenver.com
LANNIE’S CLOCKTOWER CABAR E T 16th St. Mall @ Arapahoe (303) 293-0075 lannies.com
LIL’ D EV ILS 255 South Broadway, Denver (303) 733-1156 lildevilslounge.com
LIPSTICK NIGHTCLUB
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5660 W Colfax Ave, Denver (720) 669-3470
1027 Broadway, Denver (303) 623-0700 broadwaysdenver.com
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HAPPY HOUR TIL 8PM $2 domestic drafts, $2.50 wells, $3 domestic mini pitchers SUNDAY DJ TONY All Day $1 Coors Light Draft MONDAY LEATHER & TATTOO $1 Coors Light, $3 Svedka 8pm–CL TUESDAY 2-for-1 wells/domestic drafts 8pm–CL WEDNESDAY All Day Happy Hour ABSOLUT THIRSTY THURS W/ DJ MIA $3 Absolut, $5 Fireball & Jack Fire, $6 Malibu Buckets 8pm–close FRIDAY DJ TONY 10–11pm & Midnight–1am $2 wells, $3 domestic mini pitchers SATURDAY DJ TONY All Day $3 Svedkas
700 E. 17 th Ave., Denver (303) 832-1333 MANIC MONDAYS Happy Hour from open to close. Karaoke @ 9pm with Allison TUESDAYS: OUTRAGEOUS DRAG BINGO Hosted by Sasha Andrews & Jackie Summers. Balls drop at 9pm. Free to play! WEDNESDAYS: DOLLS WITH BALLS BINGO Hosted by Alexandra Winters & Harley Quinn. Free! Starts at 9pm.
TRACKS
CHARLIE'S ® NIGHTCLUB
3500 Walnut St., Denver (303) 863-7326 tracksdenver.com
900 E. Colfax Ave., Denver (303) 839-8890 charliesdenver.com
SUPERSTAR THURSDAYS 18+ dance party Cover: 18–20 $10, 21+ $5 after 10pm
DAILY SPECIALS All Day $3 domestic mini-pitchers (32oz.) 11am–7pm: $3 wells, $3 domestics, and $4 u-calls
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1700 Logan St., Denver (303) 837-1075 denverwrangler.com
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BABES AROUND DENVER FIRST FRIDAYS Largest monthly women’s party in the US! Doors open at 6pm. 21+ DRAG NATION LAST FRIDAYS The nation’s best drag show with the hottest celebrity drag queens!
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TRADE IN FOR GOOD A fairly large crowd made their way to Trade on August 4th for a few drinks, the chance to socialize, and the opportunity to frolic in their skivvies. Denver’s newest gay bar opened last April in the old Barker Lounge, 475 Santa Fe Drive. The revamped and remodeled watering hole hosts weekly events such as Industry Night, Underwear Night, Leather and Levis, and Mean Girls and Mimosas. Photos by Charles Broshous
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Main: Fresh from the fryer hush puppies + orange Kool-aid // CORAFAYE’S CAFE / CoraFayes.com Right: Injera + lamb // QUEEN OF SHEBA ETHIOPIAN / 7225 E
PHOTOS // PAUL WEDKALE
Colfax Ave, Denver
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Chris Arneson
IF THE INITIALS J.C.B. DON’T MAKE YOUR MOUTH WATER, YOU MUST NOT HAVE STOPPED BY MY BROTHER’S BAR AT THE FOOT OF THE HIGHLANDS. And no, it’s not literally my brother’s bar, and it’s nothing like the douchetastic Brother’s Bar & Grill in downtown that used to be the Real World: Denver house. My Brother’s Bar is one of the oldest in Denver, and there’s solid reason for that. Located directly behind REI on 15th and Platte, you might’ve been passing this place for years without understanding its glory. There’s no obvious signage out front; they’re one of the word-of-mouth establishments. Google them and you’ll see a bunch of review sites keeping them strong. Their website is literally an just address and phone number. Inside is a cozy, oaken oasis. These wooden tables might be older than your grandparents. It feels like a step back in time. This is like one of those places you’d find in a small town that hasn’t seen anything new since the 70s. Bonus: There’s plenty of free parking in their lot out back. The burgers come wrapped in paper. They’ll bring you out a condiment tray with pickles, peppers, onions … the works. Put their ranch on everything, but especially the onion rings, which have that kinda crispiness you only find from a burger place that’s been doing it for decades. Several giant framed menus on the walls give it that old-school charm you want.
The beer selection is stocked with a bunch of ales and lagers you won’t find at just any bar. Good luck pronouncing some of them. No happy hour, but you can get a pint of anything for less than $5, any time. There’s no question these are some of the best burgers in Denver. The J.C.B. (jalapeno cream cheese burger) is legendary. The Johnnyburger might be the juiciest, cheesiest thing on the menu — try it double if you need hella satisfaction. But even their classic cheeseburger will blow your mind. My Brother’s Bar isn’t just a beer and burger mecca, though. Go here if you’re looking for something like a hot pretzel, nachos, or a killer grilled sandwich. Plenty of non-meat options for your veg friends, and they also cater to kiddos with corn dogs, grilled cheese, or tenders. Open at 11am every day except Sunday, their kitchen stays open until 1:30am so you can nom your drunken heart out later than most downtown kitchens. The back patio is a bit secluded and sometimes has a fire going. I’ve never seen it packed except on an occasional Saturday. This is the kind of place locals recommend, tourists want to revisit, and newbies need to discover. You’re not a true Denverite unless My Brother’s Bar is responsible for a few extra inches on your waist. OUTFRONTONLINE.COM
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love when a friendly server assumes you’re thirsty brings you water without you having to ask, so my lunch was already off to a great start. But who’s just going to drink water when they’re doing a good review. So if the place bills itself as a down-home place to eat like a Southerner, I’m going for the throat. “I’ll have a sweet tea,” please, I requested to the green-eyed server who cheerfully obliged. What she brought back was a light brew in a Mason jar with a slice — not a wedge — of lemon. (It’s the little things.) And damn, was that tea perfect. Not the molasses that becomes of a staple when outsiders try it and fail, but a well-balanced bev that glides over excited tastebuds.
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Greg Wheeler was a goner. Then, in between bites, a fresh-fried oyster that took me back to my days in Gulf Shores, Alabama. Magnificent. Absolutely magnificent. Because I’m watching the carbs, I only tested the side of grits for consistency. They nailed that, too. In spite of the name, they’re not supposed to be “gritty;” they’re meant to be slightly creamy, yet thick enough for savor for a moment. They weren’t too salty (another mistake some folks make) and they came with a pat of butter, as you do when you get it right.
I ordered the Cajun, and I’m not sure what gods I’d pleased to have made that choice, but I’ll be sure to make an offering of a few hundred calories on the treadmill later. The eggs — round and poached perfectly — were so wonderfully prepared that I felt a tinge of guilt pressing a fork into them. The liquid gold that spilled over my seafood cakes, however, dissolved that shame and piqued every bit of culinary curiosity I possess.
The interior feels like you’re in an house. That’s because you are. It was built by a gentleman from New York by the name of William J. Dunwoody. He amassed a good bit of dough in the soap business before contracting tuberculosis. Like many others with TB, a westward migration toward higher, cleaner ground went underway and he coalesced enough to go home, marry, and bring his wife back to Colorado. Here, he built the house that Sassafras now calls home. After massive renovations — but not enough for the place to lose its homey feel — plates started flying out of the kitchen in 2012 and business has been good. And deservedly so.
Have you ever eaten food so good that your brows furrowed at the first taste, as though it’s made you angry? That’s exactly what happened. The yolk, the Gulf shrimp and lump crab that comprised the cakes, the smoked cayenne hollandaise … I
Normally, I’m a stickler for adding something that could use an improvement, but I got nothin’. Get your butt seated on a wood bench inside Sassafras, or plant it in a patio chair outside, and see what it’s all about.
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Charlies
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Evelyn Franco
VIVA Colo
MBIA! WALKING THROUGH THE DOORS OF LOS Parceros from the “crusty, 1950s motel” section of Colfax is like walking through a portal into a Colombian grandmother’s kitchen. It’s a burst of yellow that reels in your irises as small things, like maracas, hats, canteens, animalhide satchels, and other Colombian iconography introduce themselves from the walls. It’s small, cozy, and apart from my table, no one spoke English. (Except, of course, the staff — but in a charming, pidginEnglish sort of way.) I ordered a frozen margarita “con sabor,” which means they throw a shot of Curacao in there, making it this gorgeous azure color that wasn’t nearly as sweet as it looked, which was great. My date ordered the empanadas appetizer, which were light, flaky, and bomb! The menu says they’re stuffed with beef 28
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FOR AN ENTREE, WE SPLIT THEIR NATIONAL DISH, BANDEJA PAISA. I’M NOT ENTIRELY SURE WHAT THAT TRANSLATES TO, BUY MY GUESS IS “HANGOVER CURE.”
and potato, but it really didn’t have a beefy taste or texture, which was rather nice and un-chewy. The sauce they were served with — aji, which is made with lime, cilantro, green onion, spicy peppers, and a dash of olive oil — was divine. I literally took the spoon and sipped it once we were out of empanadas to dunk. It tastes like a good soup! For an entree, we split their national dish, bandeja paisa. I’m not entirely sure what that translates to, buy my guess is “Hangover Cure.” It’s kind of like a Colombian version of the classic English Breakfast. (Another hangover helper.) In the bandeja paisa, you’ve got an over-easy egg over minced beef, red beans and rice, a fat little sausage link filled with pork and savory herbs, half a grilled plantain sliced lengthwise, a potato cake, and this enormous piece of pork that’s essentially eight slices in one. It’s a cross between bacon, fatback, and crackling. Intense. Must love pork. We paired it with some Dos Equis. (For the record, we could only eat a quarter of the dish before tapping out.) To be honest, I only have one criticism that’s not so positive: The beer wasn’t that cool and it was served in warm glasses that were too small to fit the entire bottle. Apart from that, it’s a charming spot with plenty of street-side parking (with no meters!) that lets you experience a bit of South America for a reasonable price. I tip my sombrero vueltiao to that!
BEER BUST + DUNK TANK AT X BAR The X Bar hosted a beer bust and dunk tank to help raise funds for One Colorado on July 31st. A large crowd turned out to enjoy the bust, dunk a few of their favorite people, enjoy the musical stylings of DJ Rockstar Aaron and help raise money for One Colorado. OUT FRONT Publisher Jerry Cunningham and 2016 Bar Wars winner Cindy Alix were among the volunteers that were dunked for dollars. Photos by Charles Broshous
MARQUEE FOOTLOOSE
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CALENDAR We’re reaching the end of the summer outdoorconcert season in the Centennial State and gearing up for an all-new season of Broadway productions, concerts from the Colorado Symphony, and so much more! It’s an exciting time to be a concert buff, and with that said, let me tell you a bit about some of the acts coming here in the next two weeks. Remember to follow me on Twitter @ Mike_Halterman!
Mike Halterman
AUG 18
BAD MAN TOUR Oh, Armandito! If the Miami rapper Pitbull makes you swoon (he has that effect on me as well), you definitely can’t miss the Denver stop on his Bad Man Tour, Thursday, August 18 at 7pm at the Pepsi Center. Hot Latin music sensations Prince Royce and Farruko will be opening for the sexy Visit Florida spokesman. TicketMaster.com
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JOSH GROBAN KOOL KONCERT KOOL 105 presents their 30th anniversary KOOL Koncert, featuring some of your 80s faves, at Fiddler’s Green Amphitheatre in Greenwood Village on Saturday, August 20 at 5pm. The headliners are Huey Lewis and the News (which, by the way, doesn’t Huey look GREAT for 66 years young?), Kool and the Gang, The Fixx, and The Go-Go’s, with the latter group currently on their final tour together after 35 years. FiddlersGreenAmp.com 30
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Josh Groban’s voice has been described as one of the most heartfelt of his generation, and he will bring his songbook to the Pepsi Center on Friday, August 19 at 7:30pm. Also performing in Denver with Groban are Canadian singer-songwriter (and noted animal-rights activist) Sarah McLachlan and Irish up-and-comer Foy Vance, who’s toured previously with Ed Sheeran. AltitudeTickets.com
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AUG 29
STYX + COLORADO SYMPHONY MY2K TOUR Many people in my age bracket (early 30s) often get misty-eyed thinking about the music they grew up with … all the dreamy men, all those heartfelt songs! Jump in a time machine headed for 2000 and attend the MY2K Tour, stopping at the 1STBANK Center in Broomfield on Sunday, August 21 at 7:30pm. 98 Degrees, Ryan Cabrera, Dream, and O-Town will all be performing. AltitudeTickets.com
Styx, well-known for their string of classic rock hits from the 70s and 80s, such as Come Sail Away, Mr. Roboto, Too Much Time on My Hands, and many more, will be partnering with The Colorado Symphony for an energetic one-night-only show at Red Rocks Amphitheatre in Morrison on Monday, August 29 at 7:30pm. ColoradoSymphony.org
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AUG 27
HIGH PLAINS COMEDY FESTIVAL The duo of Riki Lindhome and Kate Micucci deftly combine music, social commentary, and humor as comedic folk act Garfunkel and Oates. They will perform your favorites at Paramount Theatre in Denver on Saturday, August 27 at 8pm. This show is part of the High Plains Comedy Festival (August 25-27, HighPlainsComedyFestival.com) and will also feature Kyle Kinane and Cameron Esposito. AltitudeTickets.com
AUG 14
THROWING SHADE LIVE!
Many of you are well-versed in throwing shade, but could you do it live, on-stage? Bryan Safi and Erin Gibson can, and they will be bringing their show Throwing Shade Live! to the Bluebird Theater in Denver on Saturday, August 20 at 9pm. These brilliant pop culture minds can tie current events to this season of Big Brother or The Bachelorette without losing their cool — or their snark! This show is presented by MailChimp. BlueBirdTheater.net
PHANTOM OF THE OPERA Andrew Lloyd Webber’s musical masterpiece The Phantom of the Opera has enthralled countless audiences in the 30 years since it was first performed, and Cameron Mackintosh’s all-new production is coming to The Buell Theatre at the Denver Performing Arts Complex. Opening night is Thursday, August 25 and the show goes on in the Mile High City through Sunday, September 11. DenverCenter.org OUTFRONTONLINE.COM
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H E I N ZES I G H T
FACING CHALLENGES HEAD-ON (YOU’VE GOT THIS.)
Brent Heinze, Senior Columnist HEY, BRENT. I HAVE A DIFFICULT TIME DEALING WITH NEGATIVE PEOPLE AND SITUATIONS IN MY LIFE. I WORK A SOMEWHAT STRESSFUL JOB AT TIMES, BUT IT SEEMS THAT WHEN THINGS GET ROUGH, I SPIRAL OUT OF CONTROL QUICKLY. I’VE DONE THINGS LIKE CALLING OUT SICK WHEN I KNOW THERE’S A LIKELY CONFRONTATION WITH ANOTHER STAFF MEMBER, AND I LASH OUT, OR WALK AWAY WHEN A DISAGREEMENT HAPPENS. WHY DO I HAVE SUCH A HARD TIME WITH FACING THINGS THAT MAKE ME FEEL ANXIOUS AND UNCOMFORTABLE? It’s not unusual to avoid difficult people or situations in our lives, especially if engaging with these causes frustration, resentment, pain, anxiety, or a strong possibility of potential failure. These types of negative experiences are strong motivators not to pursue something difficult. I know this may seem like a surprising concept, but most people avoid conflict or things that make us feel bad. We work to get positive results while avoiding negative consequences. Many times this is a great strategy, but there are definitely times where challenging ourselves to face things in our lives that cause discomfort is to our benefit. This engagement can strengthen our confidence in tackling challenging situations. When we successfully face a situation and the outcome is favorable, we’re more likely to stick our necks out again and try to solve other difficult issues. When things don’t work out in our favor, the initial impulse may be to shy away from trying to engage again, but it’s extremely important to go back and try again. Don’t give up at the first sign of failure. Regroup, figure out how your plan could be changed, and get ready 34
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“It takes two to tango and some people become somewhat addicted to trying to help others.”
to try a new and improved method. If you’re struggling with developing a better way, ask for assistance or support. You don’t have to be the only idea-generating person. Sometimes gaining outside perception can be extremely helpful to see different sides of a conflict. Learning how to gain the confidence and initiative to face adversity is an extremely important skill to gain. If this doesn’t happen, we’re left to become slaves to difficult situations and challenging people. These will continue to maintain some type of power over you. None of us like feeling weak, angry, or stressed out when conflict happens, but dealing with it effectively is so important. Regardless if you stuff your feelings down, avoid difficulties, or become aggressive, not effectively dealing with challenges can have negative impacts on your body and your life. Whether we choose to keep these feelings inside or they explode all over the place, how we deal with challenges often comes from our life experiences. Like most things, we learn by being trained or conditioned to act, think, feel, and speak in specific ways. That includes how we generally avoid conflict. Our expectations may have included “not rocking the boat” or wanting avoid uncomfortable situations. Take some time and think about what you’re feeling when conflict is looming overhead. Consider how you dealt with difficult situations when you were younger. Evaluate how often you had a beneficial outcome when you did engage with something that stressed you out. Think about how you may come across to others in these exchanges. I think that through some tough self-reflection, you may gain more insight into why you do what you do.
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H EA LT H
But suicide continues to be a persistent poltergeist haunting not only the lives of those suffering from depression, but friends and family members as well. The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention (AFSP) reports that every day, over one hundred Americans take their own lives at a rate of 12.93 per 100K Americans. (That works out to about 42,773 Americans who die of suicide every year — that’s over 42,000 families annually that have to endure the fallout of suicide.) As someone who’s wrestled with suicidal thoughts, these statistics don’t surprise me. I once told a therapist I would commit suicide if I could get away with it. She was not at all amused. The relief that suicide offers from the internal and violent maelstrom in my mind can be overwhelmingly seductive, and I can only sympathize with those who decide to check out early from this ethereal plane. A much more talented writer by the name of Voltaire summed up suicide quite nicely in Candide: “A hundred times I wanted to kill myself, but I still loved life. This ridiculous weakness is perhaps the most disastrous of our inclinations; for is there anything sillier than to desire to bear continually a burden one always wishes to throw on the ground; to look upon oneself with horror and yet to cling to oneself; in short, to caress the serpent which devours us until he has eaten our heart?” Humor is one of my defense mechanisms, not because I’m heartless or blind to the pain suicide causes, but because there’s just too much hurt, and all I can do is laugh at the absurdity of it all — or I’d go insane.
DUELING WITH DEPRESSION: KILL IT WITH KINDNESS Mike Yost NEXT MONTH IS NATIONAL SUICIDE PREVENTION MONTH. I KNOW — not exactly something you’d write on your calendar next to Birthday Party at Mike’s! A friend might see it and ask if you’re feeling suicidal. You’d, of course, tell them “no!” before hiding in the bathroom, crying silently on the toilet while eating a slice of chocolate birthday cake (with chocolate sprinkles).
There are days when I’m drowning in emptiness and loneliness, even in the company of friends and family who I know love me. Hell, I’ve been at parties in tall apartment buildings surrounded by music and laughter while asking myself, I wonder if I could jump through that window? The fall would certainly kill me, but the glass might not break. Then I’d just look like a drunk idiot running into the window. People would laugh at me. God I’m depressed. But, I’ve also witnessed what suicide does to those left behind — cavernous, permanent scars cut across the heart. Worst of all, no one can see those scars. I truly believe that if emotional scars were visible to everyone like burns across the face, we would all be much more compassionate to each other. Sometimes a small act of kindness from a complete stranger can help reset my perspective. I feel grounded. It’s certainly not a solution, but as we roll into September and suicide awareness, keep in mind that small acts of compassion can function as a stopgap for someone suffering silently, adrift in the cold shadow of suicide. OUTFRONTONLINE.COM
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FITNESS: FORM, FUNCTION, OR BOTH? Kelsey Lindsey WHAT MOTIVATES YOU TO work out? Is it the thought of that cheat meal, the hot cycling instructor, or the endorphin rush afterwards? For me, it’s the new season of Orange is the New Black. Feeling unmotivated, I made a pact with myself: I could only get my fix of the highly addicting show while parked on an elliptical or stair stepper, ignoring my neighbors’ judgmental glances as I tried to conceal scenes of full-frontal shower nudity. Unsurprisingly, it worked — I now look forward to my hour at the gym, and even considered moving to become a member of a new gym in Westminster that features a full-sized movie theater with treadmills and ellipticals for seats. Swoon. But while the hours seem to slip by with my video distractions, I always wondered: Is this too easy? Is distracting and bating yourself with movies, TV shows, or even podcasts the best way to achieve your fitness results? Luckily, I wasn’t the only person to ask this question. Many studies have looked into the benefits or detriments of working out while distracted, many concluding the same results. The first thing any doctor will be quick to point out is anything — cute guy, fun class, and yes, a TV show — that gets you to regularly 38
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work out is good. If it’s a choice between you sitting on your couch watching a movie and you cycling along while doing the same thing, go with the latter. Movement = good. Sedentary lifestyle = bad, capisce? But when it comes to really pushing yourself, that’s where the screen or even podcast may be trouble. This is especially true while running on the treadmill, where proper form is key to preventing injuries. Straining your neck while looking down on the screen is unfortunately not considered proper form. Watching TV can also distract you from other important things, say, if your shoelace is untied or if you’re getting dangerously close to the edge of the treadmill. For serious athletes with fitness goals, the TV may become too much of a distraction, making you lose sight of the results you’re after. When people really get into a show or podcast, they’re likely to slow their workout intensity, burning fewer calories than they would without the screen. It’s no wonder that the superstar athletes I see sprinting on treadmills are completely unplugged: Instead of focusing on Piper’s newest drama on OITNB, they’re making sure their form, pace, and breathing are correct. To each his own, I guess.
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