December 2021 :: Gift Guide by OUT FRONT Magazine

DECEMBER 2021

2021

QUEER

Gift Guide

CHOOSE your HAPPY

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TABLE OF CONTENTS VOLUME 45 NUMBER 09 DECEMBER 2021

OFM DRAG Kimora Blac

FROM THE EDITOR

OFM BREAKING Love Trumps Hate The Facebook Papers Gender Neutral Passport

OFM HEALTH Giving the Gift of Nourishment On the Naughty List

OFM ART Jiji Knight Chanel DesArden

OFM CULTURE Out App Creates LGBTQ Hub Support Black and Brown Businesses 4 OFM DECE M B E R 2 0 2 1

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QUEER HOLIDAY GIFT GUIDE 28

OFM GALLERY Make Your Yuletide Gay

OFM MUSIC PHNTMS

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PHIL PRICE 1954-1993 ADMINISTRATION INFO@OUTFRONTMAGAZINE.COM CO-PUBLISHER MAGGIE PHILLIPS CO-PUBLISHER ADDISON HERRON-WHEELER PRESIDENT JERRY CUNNINGHAM CHIEF STRATEGISTS JEFF JACKSON SWAIM, LANI LANGTON

OFM STYLE Winter Skin Savers Cold-Weather Fashion Tips Inclusivity in Body Modification

OFM CANNABIS Stone Road: Small Batch Cannabis

OFM THOUGHTS A Queer in Recovery

OFM LUST The Costume Room

EDITORIAL EDITORIAL@OUTFRONTMAGAZINE.COM EDITOR-IN-CHIEF ADDISON HERRON-WHEELER EXECUTIVE CREATIVE DIRECTOR, MUSIC EDITOR VERONICA L. HOLYFIELD COPY EDITOR KEEGAN WILLIAMS CELEBRITY INTERVIEWER DENNY PATTERSON BREAKING NEWS REPORTER, PODCAST EDITOR RAY MANZARI WRITERS AMANDA E.K., ANASTASIA HILL, ANGEL RIVERA, BRIAN ARAGON-SHAFI

BYRDSONG, O’BRIAN GUNN, RACHEL GALSTAD, ZACHARI BREEDING INTERNS BRANDON WHEELDON, DCIDUOUS LIVINGSTONG, SAMUEL CLARK ART ART@OUTFRONTMAGAZINE.COM GRAPHIC DESIGNER VERONICA L. HOLYFIELD COVER PHOTO JULIUS GARRIDO FEATURED ARTIST JIJI KNIGHT CARTOONIST DYLAN EDWARDS MARKETING + SALES MARKETING@OUTFRONTMAGAZINE.COM SENIOR MARKETING EXECUTIVE QUINCEY ROISUM JUNIOR SALES & MARKETING EXECUTIVES BRIANNA ARMSTRONG,

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OFM LIT The Eulogy: Part 2

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FROM THE EDITOR ‘Tis the Season to

Shop Local For better or for worse, the holidays are here again. This year, I’m hearing mixed messages about what the season means for them. Some are absolutely overjoyed that they get to celebrate the true meaning of the season and connect with friends and family. Others are concerned because they don’t think things will be the same, with shipping delays and inflation impacting holiday shopping. Of course, the big message here is one you can also find watching The Grinch (I’m not being jaded here, I love The Grinch)—that Christmas can’t just be found in a store. It’s about the connection and community the season makes you think of. But, to be real, we live in a capitalistic society, and holiday shopping is a huge part of how artisans make their living. So this year, in addition to remembering the bigger meaning behind the season, if you do decide to grab some gifts for friends and family, think local! And we’ve got you covered. Our Holigay Bazaar events are all about stocking up and shopping local, connecting with vendors who are going to get really stoked on their sales. And even if you can’t make it to one of our special events, you can always check out other pop-ups and commission your friends to do what they do best and provide you with the goods and services you might otherwise be tempted to buy from big-box realtors. Whether you make a run on all the local vendors until they sell out, or just choose a few pieces for that special someone, or those special someones, may your Yuletide—or whatever you celebrate—be gay! Addison Herron-Wheeler

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Topeka, Kansas by Denny Patterson

opeka, Kansas was once best known as the home of the infamous Westboro Baptist Church. Now, it is becoming a city bursting with LGBTQ Pride.

Thanks to the efforts of residents, activists, politicians, and entrepreneurs, the city is leading the way in making the state capitol into a place full of love and acceptance. “I always credit former councilman Chad Manspeaker with initiating the conversation,” Mayor Michelle De La Isla says. “He wanted to move forward with making policies that would protect the LGBTQ community, and it was very interesting to see that level of concern. We were able to get the votes for employees to not be discriminated against on the basis of gender or sexual identity, and that kind of started to get the ball rolling. Topeka is known for many things, but inclusivity was probably not one of them. Things have progressed, and I think that provides a voice to the LGBTQ community.” Following her service on the Topeka City Council from 20132018, De La Isla is the city’s first Latina to be elected mayor. She is excited to see how the narrative has significantly changed.

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“We had Chris Shultz, the first open LGBTQ individual that ran for mayor the same time I did,” she says. “We have a very vibrant Pride community. As things kept evolving, we have changed a lot of our policies at the city level without impacting other businesses. We are leading by example with the way that we regard our LGBTQ brothers, sisters, and individuals.” De La Isla does not want to paint Topeka as a community where there are no differing opinions, but she says what makes the city so wonderful is the fact that individuals who have vehemently different opinions from each other can coexist and be kind to one another. “You are going to be loved and welcomed, no matter what,” she says. “Everybody may not agree, but you are still respected and have value way beyond the basic premises. It has nothing to do with who you love or how you identify. You are still a human.” There are several LGBTQ-friendly establishments located throughout the city, but one of its well-known monuments and most sought out tourist attractions is the Equality House, a “loud and proud” rainbow icon dedicated to LGBTQ rights.

Photo provided by Equality House

OFM breaking

LOVE TRUMPS HATE

Photo provided by Equality House

Visitors are also invited to stay in the Liberty House, an Airbnb that donates proceeds to the Trevor Project, and encouraged to check out the city’s NOTO Arts & Entertainment District, which is home to Pinkadilly, a hip boutique that offers Pride merch, and Studio 62, an eclectic art bar that hosts weekly drag shows. “Studio 62 is the LGBTQ place to be,” owner Chelsea Smith says. “Our guests can paint their own work of art with the help from a studio artist, and we offer Drag & Paint, where our guests are entertained and inspired by drag queens as they perform and guide them through a fabulous painting.” Studio 62 also offers open mic karaoke every Tuesday night, drag performances with blacklight body glow paint on Fridays, and Drag Saturdays allow guests to enjoy a variety of performances by the drag performers of Studio 62. They also offer open drag shows twice a month where anyone can perform. “We encourage and help new performers get their start in the drag world,” Smith says. Currently, Topeka is preparing for its first statewide 2022 Pride celebration on the steps of the Kansas Capitol Building. Local activist Shawn Brian has established a Kansas Pride 501C3 to create a statewide Pride effort centered in Topeka. This year,

the city painted rainbow crosswalks, and the Topeka Chamber created “Inclusive Topeka” stickers for local businesses. “A few months ago, a gentleman named Bob Ross, who works for the Greater Topeka Partnership, and I started bouncing around this idea of a statewide Pride celebration,” Brian says. “I think it will be very significant. There have been smaller celebrations that have happened throughout the past, but none of them had the support of an organization such as Greater Topeka Partnership that could really make it a lasting, annual event. With that partnership and with the support of Visit Topeka and Go Topeka, which are all geared towards bringing people from outside communities to either visit or live in the city, it has not been done on this big of a scale. We are not just representing one city, but the state as a whole.”

OFM breaking

Owned by the nonprofit Planting Peace and located across the street from the Westboro Baptist Church, the Equality House welcomes visitors to sign the outside and take pictures in front of the home’s rainbow backdrop.

Sadly, De La Isla has decided to not run for re-election, but she says she is supporting a candidate who is an advocate and supporter of the LGBTQ community. “I know this individual will make sure that he is going to stand up for inclusivity and belonging for everybody in our community,” she says. “More importantly, we must remember that changes in our community do not happen because one leader is at the helm. Change in our community happens because you allow for people to be who they are, find their voice, and have the freedom to advocate and speak up. So, regardless of what happens in our community, we are still going to have voices and individuals who are going to be welcoming and loving to everybody. That is the magic of Topeka.”

Be Loved Exactly As You Are

YO U N G I N T H E M O U N TA I N S . C O M | 3 0 7 0 B L A K E S T, U N I T 1 6 0 D E N V E R , C O 8 0 2 0 5

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THE

OFM breaking

facebook

PAPERS by Ray Manzari

ormer Facebook Product Manager Frances Haugen obtained thousands of pages of internal company documents which highlighted the platform’s effects on society and politics. Facebook’s employees had long since warned their superiors of the harmful spread of misinformation on the platform as well as the company’s inability to moderate content effectively. According to Haugen, the documents, known as the Facebook Papers, prove that the company’s leaders have repeatedly and knowingly put the company’s image and profitability ahead of public safety. Prior to leaving her position at Facebook, Haugen copied thousands of pages of internal research done by the company, research, Haugen claims, is mostly ignored.

“When we live in an information environment that is full of angry, hateful, polarizing content; it erodes our civic trust; it erodes our faith in each other; it erodes our ability to want to care for each other; the version of Facebook that exists today is tearing our societies apart and causing ethnic violence around the world,” Haugen says on 60 Minutes. The genocide in Myanmar that took place in 2018 when the military used Facebook to spread anti-Islamic sentiments as a tool for ethnic cleansing is one of many examples Haugen referenced. The company did understand the possible violence surrounding the

it’s now out of control,” one employee writes on an internal message board, the documents show. The documents suggest other myriad concerns, including research that suggests Instagram is directly harmful to teenage girls, human trafficking rings in the Middle East using the platform to “sell maids,” and a separate set of content guidelines for high-profile users such as celebrities and politicians. Haugen’s lawyers have filed at least eight complaints with the Securities and Exchange Commission, which enforces the law in financial markets. “As a publicly-traded company, Facebook is required to not lie to its investors or even withhold material information. So, the SEC regularly brings enforcement actions, alleging that companies like Facebook and others are making material misstatements and omissions that affect investors adversely,” says John Tye, one of Haugen’s lawyers.

“Facebook, over and over again, has shown it chooses profit over safety.”

“We have evidence from a variety of sources that hate speech, divisive political speech, and misinformation on Facebook and the family of apps are affecting societies around the world,” the papers read.

Since the release of the Facebook Papers, the company has been accused of propagating political violence both in the U.S. and abroad. Changes in the website’s algorithm in 2018 have led to more negative content being promoted on the platform. The algorithm shows users content they are more likely to interact with, which in turn is more likely to be controversial topics. Portions of the internal reports detail complaints from European political parties which say the parties “… feel strongly that the change to the algorithm has forced them to skew negative in their communications on Facebook … leading them into more extreme policy positions.”

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2020 presidential election and had turned on safety systems to try to combat misinformation and hate speech. “And as soon as the election was over, they turned them back off or they changed the settings back to what they were before to prioritize growth over safety. And that really feels like a betrayal of democracy to me,” Haugen said during the same interview. That betrayal would culminate during the January 6 insurrection, which was organized largely over social media. Facebook had removed the original Stop the Steal group in November of 2020 but didn’t ban content using the phrase until after the insurrection. “We’ve been fueling this fire for a long time, and we shouldn’t be surprised

Facebook is a $1 trillion company. Just 17 years old, it has 2.8 billion users, which is 60 percent of all internetconnected people on Earth. Haugen has testified in front of congress in regard to Facebook and believes the federal government should regulate the platform to protect the public. “Facebook, over and over again, has shown it chooses profit over safety. It is subsidizing; it is paying for its profits with our safety,” Haugen says. “I’m hoping that this will have had a big enough impact on the world that they get the fortitude and the motivation to actually go put those regulations into place. That’s my hope.”

Gender Neutral Passport

Issued to

Fort Collins Resident

OFM breaking

America’s First

by Ray Manzari

he State Department issued its first official passport with an ‘X’ gender marker, as it seeks to be more inclusive to intersex and nonbinary people. The change comes after a federal lawsuit by a nonbinary Fort Collins resident, Dana Zzyym, who argued that it was impossible to get a passport that could accurately reflect their gender identity. “It’s great news for all intersex and nonbinary people because it basically says that we can get our passports,” Zzyym told NPR in June. “We don’t have to lie to get our passports. We can just be ourselves.” Lambda Legal, who represented Zzyym during their federal lawsuit, announced that the Colorado resident was the first to receive their gender ‘X’ passport. At least 20 states and Washington, D.C. have also implemented similar changes to state identification. The change in passport markers is in line with several other nations which provide gender-neutral passports including Canada, India, Australia, Nepal, and New Zealand. “In terms of the assertion of nonbinary identity, it has gotten a lot more attention recently, and legally speaking, the policies are catching up,” says Arli Christian, state policy counsel for the National Center for Transgender Equality. “For the most accurate identification document, there should be a nonbinary option.” This change in policy comes amid myriad controversial legislation, including a North Carolina law requiring trans people to use the public restrooms that are consistent with the sex on their birth certificate. Zzyym however, is a perfect example as to how messy the process can be. Born intersex, the gender on Zzyym’s birth certificate was originally left blank, although the document was later amended to say ‘unknown.’ Zzyym served in the Navy as a man before openly identifying as intersex while working and studying at Colorado State University. Laws like the North Carolina bathroom bill ignore individuals, like Zzyym, whose birth certificate reads neither male nor female. “Intersex, nonbinary, and transgender people need identity documents that accurately reflect who we are, and having mismatched documents can create problems with safety and visibility,” says Mary Emily O’Hara of GLAAD.

The U.S. special diplomatic envoy for LGBTQ rights, Jessica Stern, says the decision brings the government documents in line with the “lived reality” that there is a wider spectrum of human sex characteristics than is reflected in the previous two designations. “When a person obtains identity documents that reflect their true identity, they live with greater dignity and respect,” Stern says. “We see this as a way of affirming and uplifting the human rights of trans and intersex and gendernonconforming and nonbinary people everywhere.” While Zzyym, 63, says it was thrilling to finally get the passport, the goal was to help the next generation of intersex people win recognition as full citizens with rights, rather than travel the globe. “I’m not a problem. I’m a human being. That’s the point,” Zzyym says.

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OFM health

Tis the Season

Giving the Gift of Nourishment By Zachari Breeding, MS, RDN, CSO, LDN, FAND

or better or worse, the holiday season typically incites many folks to search through their cabinets for leftover cans of pineapple or cranberry sauce to donate to their local food pantry. Even though many food rescue organizations (a more global term for food pantries) need supplies year-round, the influx of donations during the holiday season is an opportune time to provide ample support for the remainder of the year. Additionally, taxdeductible, monetary donations tend to spike during this time of year, as the tax year is ending. Whether a person wishes to donate their time, money, or supplies (such as food, clothing, or toys), there are some important things to keep in mind when considering the needs of the organizations that accept donations.

Ditch the Dusty Cans As someone who has volunteered their time and resources to many food pantries, I can tell you that the amount of donated boxed stuffing and crushed boxes of cereal is flabbergasting. Sure, donating food you likely aren’t going to use seems like a win-win, but what you don’t want in your pantry is likely something not worth donating. Many food rescue organizations collect non-perishable items and try their best to organize them into donation bins that then go to families or individuals who may not have a kitchen or cooktop. While there is not much someone can do with a box of dried stuffing mix, there is plenty someone can do with canned beans, fruit, potatoes, vegetables, tuna, and chicken. If you aren’t a fan of eating canned potatoes or chicken out of the can, that means someone else is likely not going to be a fan, either. Consider throwing in seasoning packets or low-sodium gravy (not glass jars) so food can be flavored in a more appealing way. Unfortunately, many people who are food insecure and rely on food rescue organizations lack adequate healthcare or nutrition and are typically also struggling with a nutritionrelated chronic illness such as type 2 diabetes, heart or kidney disease, or malnutrition. Choose items to donate that are low in salt, not overly processed, and can be easily found in their natural form (i.e. potatoes or chicken). There is no need to go organic or choose the most expensive versions of these foods; in fact, I try to choose the least pricey items so I can buy more and help as many people as possible. 1 4 OFM DECE M B E R 2 0 2 1

SAVING LIVES ONE SMILE AT A TIME

Providing comprehensive and integrated oral health care services to adults, youth and children living with HIV/AIDS and other health conditions in a compassionate atmosphere. Food is not the Limit Donating food is by far one of the easiest things to do but not the only way to help. Many organizations need monetary contributions to help fill the gaps in what they do not acquire through food donations. Organizations can also use that money to hire employees to assist with the inundating task of helping others who face food and housing insecurities. If you wish to donate your own time to help out, it is usually best to offer your help outside of the holiday season, as many food rescue organizations have too many (yes, it is possible) volunteers and often end up sending people home. There is such a thing as too many cooks in the kitchen, after all. Help Out Locally I have always felt it so important for folks to contribute to their local communities as much as possible. However you wish to help, it is appreciated by the folks who run these organizations all year long. The following organizations (though not a complete list) are located in the Denver/ Aurora areas and could use any help you are able to provide: Metro Caring Weinberg Food Pantry Community Table Denver Metro Emergency Food Network Covenant Cupboard Food Pantry

You can always find somewhere local to your neighborhood to aid as well. Due to the impact of the ongoing pandemic, there are more people who are food insecure than in years prior. Even if you don’t have a bounty of your own resources to offer, organizing a group donation is easy. Placing a big, empty box in your place of employment (such as in the employee break room) is a perfect way to collect group donations without pressuring anyone to contribute. I’ve raised as much as 2,000 pounds of food this way in the past. However you choose to gather donations, remember to post guidelines (such as those mentioned above) to help guide folks in the right direction. As the holidays approach, let’s be thankful for what we have in life and, if applicable, be thankful for the ability to help others through the gift of nourishment.

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Art by Jiji Knight

OFM health

Tales of a Fierce, Fat, Fit, Femme

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On the

Naughty List:

No Shame Addison Herron-Wheeler

e all have mixed feelings about the holidays. Some have too much trauma associated or hate the connotations of colonialism and traditional family. Others can’t help but feel a sense of euphoria when the holidays roll around, as thoughts drift to cocoa, warm fires, presents, family, and generally being merry and gay.

COMING SOON “The most ‘extra’ Christmas event in town...

magical.”

– 303 Magazine

I personally fall on the loving-the-holidays side. While I have my share of shit to unpack, I’m privileged enough to have parents who instilled good memories into my life regarding this time of year. But still, no matter how much I love this season, there’s one thing about it that always drives me nuts: holiday guilt—the idea that you’re “being bad” by treating yourself to that piece of pie or second helping of mashed potatoes, the constant jokes and promises about going back to the gym after the holidays to help deal with all the extra weight allegedly put on by the season of giving. Sure, for the most part, it’s all in good fun, just a harmless, self-deprecating joke about the decadent food you’re more likely to eat on a cultural holiday than on any given day at home or work. And there definitely is that reality, the fact that you’re eating a bit more decadently, and maybe feel that, although this season is fun and relaxing, you’re ready to get back into the gym and keep moving and healthy when the new year hits. But there’s also the reality that, when you’re constantly talking about how fat you’re going to get from hearty eating—and making that sound like the worst thing ever—all fat people in the room get uncomfortable, feeling like they’re the worst thing that could possibly happen to somebody. And then there’s the unspoken assumption that plus-sized folks just eat like it’s the holidays all year round and don’t exercise. In fact, there’s a lot of that weird “naughty” connotation going on with the holidays. Lingerie is given behind closed doors, as though the idea of folks being sexual is something taboo. Drinking is treated as an indulgence, instead of what it is—an addiction or bad habit for some, a casual passtime for others. It seems to be a time when, as we get a little closer to tradition, for better or for worse, some of those puritanical ideas creep back in. So, this year, as you get ready for your holiday indulgences, give yourself a little grace. As long as you eat and drink responsibly, pie and eggnog are reasonable vices, and you’ll live if you bail on the gym for a week or two due to closures and holiday gatherings. Take the time you deserve to enjoy the short bit of relaxation we get, and try not to ruin it for other people who are indulging alongside you.

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OFM art

Jiji Knight

Draws her Way to

CURVY GIRL

LIBERATION The first time I saw Jiji Knight’s work at ComicCon, I was completely blown away. It isn’t just that she embraces curvy women and realistic bodies in her works; it’s the way she puts those bodies front-and-center, making them sexy, edgy, demure—all the things curvy folks are generally deprived of being. And the detail she puts into her work is groundbreaking—from stretch marks, curves, and folds to shirt logos and tattoos, her work is beyond inspired. We chatted with her about her work, the creative process, and what makes her want to put art out into the world. How did you first become an artist, and what inspires your style and content? At the risk of sounding cheesy, I have always been an artist! From the moment I could comprehend that putting a pen to a paper made things happen, I would tote around a lined notebook and a ballpoint pen. (There was never a shortage of pens in our house. We had pens from, like, so many of the casinos since they were free and branded promotional material.) I'm inspired by beauty and exploring what that means, by the idea of death and motifs that surround it, and by whatever makes my strange little heart flutter with serotonin. Sometimes what inspires 1 8 OFM DECE M B E R 2 0 2 1

me is revisiting old drawings and reimagining them through an updated lens. Where do you come up with all the new ideas for variations on your style? My inspiration comes a lot from the shape language of fashion and haute couture, fashion illustrations, from some of my favorite artists (like Alphonse Mucha and Audrey Kawasaki), and from personal obsessions. I love flowers, bones, negative space, hourglasses—there are just a lot of items that give me that urge to make something, so I do. Oddly enough, I come up with a lot of my best ideas mid-dissociation. It's

like my brain goes brrrrrrr and just puts together colors and shapes that make sense and the act of making it real is gratifying. Most of all, my best inspiration comes from just making things that make me happy. If it makes me happy, chances are other people will vibe with it and find my joy to make it their own. Why do you think it is so important to provide imagery and depiction of curvy women in your work? I think it's important to provide people the ability to see themselves or someone like themselves in media! We should see ourselves as happy, fat, and thriving. Sad, without the sadness being tied to our weight but more so

is the end of facing medical incompetence in anything health related. BMI is bullshit. Nearly every doctor assumes whatever is wrong with us is because of our weight and nothing else and act like losing it will magically fix everything. Fuck that! Do you have anything special you want to promote or announce? Just my work and my Patreon! I have a monthly sticker club that has become my lifeblood and a way to connect with my fans in turn for their support. For $15 a month, you get early access to my work, first dibs on any new merch I make, store discounts, a private section in my online store of patrononly goodies, first access to any commission openings when they open, and so much more. And that is on top of the two stickers shipped directly to you every month. They're usually four inches or bigger, sometimes it's a sticker and sticker sheet, sometimes an extra sticker is included for a set of three that month—I try to keep it fun!

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because we're crybabies and emotional. Powerful, because we are as powerful as any other person. And, most of all, we should be afforded the chance to feel beautiful. I started out by doing it for me, for my mental health, drawing girls that looked like me. The byproduct of being able to uplift people around me who feel the way I do has been magical. It became less about me and more about us as a community combatting the weird shame that comes with being “the fat friend.”

What is the best way to be an ally to plus-sized folks and show support? There are so many little things that go a long way when it comes to being a supportive ally! The first one I want to stress is understanding some places, even as an ally, are not for you. The body positivity movement is a mere shadow of what it started as, and in this day and age is very much dominated by thin bodies. What was once two separate concepts, selflove and body positivity, have long since had their boundaries blurred to the point where they're unrecognizable from one another and used interchangeably. How can people find your work and buy your art? I am pretty much @Jijidraws across the board! On Instagram, Now it's less about celebrating fat bodies and more about Twitter, Facebook, Tumblr, and even TikTok and Twitch how all bodies are beautiful. While the sentiment is lovely, (though I don't generally stream). My shop is very simply and most of us agree all bodies are, in fact, beautiful, spaces Jijidraws.shop! Or inprnt.com/gallery/jijidraws for art prints that are made by plus-sized people for plus-sized people are of pieces I no longer personally make prints of. I try to make important and need to be respected like any other space made it very easy to find me (laughs). If you're not much for social by groups to find community, safety, and love. I think the media, I do have a website at JijiKnight.com (also accessible second important thing an ally needs to do is ask themselves via Jijidraws.com) and a mailing list where you get the heads is if their show of support is more for themselves than it is for up on shop openings when they happen. the people they are trying to help empower; did you, as an ally, make your show of support about you and your body in Is there anything else you'd like to add? some way, therein overshaddowing the community and the Yes! I fully believe in uplifting people in your point of the show of support? And lastly, but possibly the community. most important, would be for an ally to actively work to combat their own fatphobia. What that means for you So if you like what I do, I recommend as an ally is up to you to research. you check out my illustrator colleagues Maya Kern, Hara How do you hope society and stereotypes will Atsume, Sara Tisdale, Jess Lome, change in the next five to 10 years? Mel Stringer, Shelby Bergen, I hope for the inclusion of basic, human things and Marie Boiseau. They all we need as a plus-sized person on a day-tomake body positive work you'd day basis to what is considered “the normal” adore! I would also be a fool for society. Being able to walk into any store not to plug The (Other) F and know they carry all of their clothes— Word: A Celebration of the no matter what the style—from an XS to at Fat & Fierce edited by Angie least a 6X as a standard practise would be a Manfredi. It is a nonfiction dream. anthology that features personal essays, poems, It would be great for plus-size fashion to not art, and more, all by mean 'dress like a business-casual, middleincredible fat influencers, aged mom' as early as our teens because authors, and creators. that's all that's easily accessible in person. Not having to worry about needing some sort of seat belt extender in any situation would be rad, or being scared you won't fit into the economy seat on an airplane because the norm means anyone will fit no matter how big or small. Anything that could mitigate the quiet panic attacks we get out of sheer fear or embarrassment because we need something that isn't already readily available. My biggest hope for society however outfrontma ga zine.com 19

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Chanel DesArden The Tale of the Tiny Tattooer By Rachel Galstad

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icon alert! This bi icon is transforming traditionalinspired tattoos into her own unique and vibrant style. Chanel DesArden, more commonly known to her followers and clients as Tiny Tattooer, not only decorates human flesh, but creates custom artwork and merchandise, all radiating major bisexual energy! How long have you been tattooing, and how did you get started? I will be celebrating six years of tattooing in December, which is crazy, but I started very young. I always knew that I wanted to be a tattooer. When I was a teenager, I asked to have an apprenticeship. I was 13, in a band, and one of my bandmates’ dad was a tattooer at a shop that I would eventually get an apprenticeship at years later. I tried so many places in my area as a teenager. I’d get, “You’re too young,” or, “We already have an apprentice.” Finally, when I was 18, I took a look at my portfolio, and said, “I’m ready to go back to that shop and get an apprenticeship.” And sure enough, I did, and I’ve been tattooing ever since. How would you describe your personal tattooing style? It definitely derives from traditional tattooing; technically, it’s called neotraditional. I’ve been trying to break the barriers that I’ve always been taught in the tattoo world to create things on skin that are more authentic to what I do on paper, what I paint—Those are the things that really come from the heart. Where did the name “Tiny Tattooer” come from? I was always Pendleton online before Tiny Tattooer, like Pendleton Ward, the creator of Adventure Time. So, I thought maybe I should change this. One day I was going through options, trying to find whatever sounds good. I thought of “Tiny Tattooer,” and I was like, “That sounds nice; we’ll just go with that.” It fits because I’m also very small. I’m 4’11”; I’m tiny, and I literally shop in the kids’ section for shoes and all that annoying stuff that tiny people say. How do you think being a queer reflects in your work? Interacting with the world around me through the lense of a bisexual woman, I think, reflects in everything I create, everything I do, really. It’s something I haven’t put much thought into until now, actually, because it’s ever-present. I was 11 years old when I first came out. At the time, kids could be very cruel about it, but it somehow still felt so liberating! Some of my family were accepting; others were very religious and would go on to conveniently forget over the years and say horrible things about being gay in front of me. Being flamboyant, androgynous, openly queer, or even something as simple as listening to Lady Gaga would make some of them squirm. As a kid, that just makes you want to do more of those things! For me, it always fueled me to stand

firm in who I am. There have been moments of self-hatred and trying to be someone I wasn’t, which is unfortunately so common among LGBTQ+ youth. But, in spite of those moments, I’ve mostly done things my way, knowing who I am. I think the way that reflects in my art most is with my devil ladies, I think for very obvious reasons. What is the influence behind your signature heart face? It’s a super-old concept. A lot of the inspiration comes from traditional tattooing and Bert Grimm. He was the first one to do the crying heart, and people have made millions of different iterations of that concept. There’s so much to do with it, so much character that you can portray in a face, and I just love heart shapes, so it became my thing by accident. What inspired you to expand your business and start selling custom artwork and merchandise? It was a few months before the pandemic, and I was feeling stagnant. I felt as if I was wasting my potential to expand as an artist only drawing flash. I started painting again, it was always something I could totally get lost in and never got sick of. Mark Ryden is somebody that really inspires me, and he always paints on wood. I decided to copy him a little and paint on some wood. I painted a sacred heart that ended up going sort of viral on Twitter. I was like, “Whoa, I wasn’t expecting that kind of response.” I ended up opening my commissions. I started selling prints, making earrings, painting boxes, and gluing teeth onto shit, all sorts of shit. Then I started painting bags, because of this amazing artist. She paints on bags and is incredible at it. Her work feels very 60s, has this mystique to it with a really cool color palette. So I decided to take that and the techniques I’d already been doing on boxes and earrings. Gluing pearls, lace, and spikes onto things, and I put it all together for some real handbags. It started with wooden bags that you find at Michaels; then I started hunting for faux-leather bags. My influences for overall style are a few different artists. I really enjoy artists who have a classical feel to them, but they’re still in a pop, surrealist realm. To keep up with Tiny Tattooer, find her on Instagram @tiny.tattooer.

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OUT APP

Aims to Create Hub for LGBTQ Friendships, Queer Events, and More By Keegan Williams

nna Harissis and Jen Farmer faced the same dilemma many others shared as the pandemic pressed on: Following months of isolation, especially as two people fresh to Denver, they were looking for a way to safely build their group of friends with other queer folks. Ironically, the two friends and business partners initially met on a dating app (though neither were necessarily looking to date), further highlighting the lack of an app explicitly for queer friendships.

Bumble is one app that started as a dating app before introducing a “BFF” component focused on friendship, which Harissis says, in her experience, can be hard to disconnect from. “I sometimes find myself swiping based on how I would (on the Bumble dating app), and I’m like, ‘Oh God,’ because it still has the dating app association. So, we wanted something that was totally removed—friendship focus— there’s no question what you’re coming to that for.” Farmer agrees, “I felt like, whether it’s true or not, they all kind of came across as dating apps first that are shifting toward friendship, and I’m seeing that across the board. Everyone, even the major brands, are trying to shift into

Thus, the Out App was born. The idea started as a series of hypothetical conversations. Farmer has a history working in growth marketing, while Harissis has a background in mental health advocacy, queer community building, and social work, and the pair finally decided, as innovative thinkers with entrepreneurial spirits, they could create something special.

“It’d be like, out yourself everywhere you go, basically sit alone at a bar and hope someone talks to you, or basically go on dating apps,” Farmer says. “It’s weird to be on a dating app for friends only and then there’s all these—you hang out with someone, and they actually want to hook up and it’s like, ‘Well, I was actually looking for friends.’”

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Photos courtesy of Out App

Farmer points out that, as of right now, queer folks looking to expand their community are often limited to two options that regularly end up with more wasted time than new friends.

The app will have a friend-finding feature that they say is most similar to Hinge, with a profile in which users can fill out information about themselves and someone else can essentially hit yes or no, though the founders want to move away from the swiping culture of other apps in favor of a more search-based system.

Harissis and Farmer assert that they want the Out App to be for everyone, and as they continue forward in the development stage, they want to have different voices in the room to ensure they are including everyone in the LGBTQ community. “That’s that last thing we want, is to put this out there and have there be anything that would upset people,” Harissis says.

Essentially, there will be a matchmaking system running in the background that can help users find other people based on compatible interests.

“I definitely think of this as like an app like created for and by the community, and that people who want to be a part of it–I’m sure we can find places for them,” Farmer adds.

In addition, they want the app to be a resource where people can find community events, and they plan to include a resource section, with opportunities for users to vouch for businesses and areas that are queer-friendly around the country and one day, the world.

The Out App is currently moving forward following a successful soft launch and news that it has received funding to begin the next stage of development. To start, the pair are looking solely at the United States, though they are dreaming big, already receiving interest from countries around the world.

“This is our end goal, to have it be a massive resource for the queer community,” Harissis says, “not only a place to find friends, to create and find events and groups, but also to create a safe place and a place to find safe spaces for our community.” Another issue with the current market is that many apps are not affirming for all people in the community, like nonbinary and gender-nonconforming people; a handful allow people to self-identify their gender, including nonbinary options, before asking them to select who to be shown to (people looking for women or men), effectively placing them back into a binary they aren’t a part of.

OFM culture

friendship making, but they already have that brand, and I think it’s sometimes awkward.”

From here, the co-founders will move forward with a UX developer to build the interface and hope the app will be ready to launch by Pride 2022. “The soft launch and people’s excitement is actually what is making this app possible, because that is what spawned the discussions with possible investors suddenly wanting to give us that money that we need to get going, take all those features, and actually start building the app,” Farmer says. ”That was a huge, huge milestone that was, frankly, due to the community and their response.” Harissis echoes, “When our community backs something, I feel like …” she pauses to add emphasis with her hands and a beaming facial expression, to suggest the power of the LGBTQ community’s support. “But if they don’t? All this momentum is for nothing, so we’ve got to do it right. We are very aware of that.” Keep up with the Out App and launch updates on their official website, outqueerapp.com, and on Instagram @out.theapp.

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The Reality of Business Equity Corey Edwards, Northwest region and Colorado director of Western Governors University and founder of Invizibee, has a few ideas. In his recent article, “Equity Still Lacks Where Black Businesses are Concerned,” Edwards writes, “Laws no longer bar Black folks from living where they want, marrying who they want or going into business in any field they want. And since 2010, the number of Fortune 500 companies with more than 40 percent diversity on their boards of directors has quadrupled.” He continues, “Much of that diversity has increased over the past year, sparked in part by worldwide outrage and protests following the murder of George Floyd by a Minneapolis police officer. But 40 percent of all Fortune 500 board seats won’t be held by diverse individuals for decades—not until 2074, if current projects hold true. “Both the Tulsa and Minneapolis tragedies prompt us to wonder, how far have we come? The answer is clear—we are a long way from living in an equitable society.” So, what is the answer? “The solution has to involve the entire ecosystem. Including the business sector,” Edwards says.

Support Black and Brown Businesses

(and not just for the Holidays) by Anastasia Hill

Edwards follows this statement with horrific, yet unsurprising, statistics from fundera.com about the incredible disparity that still exists between Black individuals and their white counterparts in the world of business. Fortunately he also highlights opportunities to close that gap:

•“Black entrepreneurs need to pursue business ownership in more lucrative sectors. For instance, wholesale business represents 24 percent of all The holidays are upon us, with all their bittersweet feels: the business revenues, but only 1 percent nostalgia; the comfort of warm light in the cold darkness; of Black women and 2 percent of Black and the very persistent, existential anguish of an inequitable men entrepreneurs are in this sector. world that seems so far from making any changes. How can we confront the vast disparity fueled by capitalism’s racist • “Black entrepreneurs might look for roots while still having to engage in the system, all without mentors to improve networking and exposure. Research in New York revealed losing our ethics? that founders who are mentored by topperforming entrepreneurs were three times more likely than their peers to become top performers.

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• “Improve use of corporate and government procurement programs that target Black-owned businesses, particularly among large ‘anchor’ institutions in the community.” If you understood everything suggested above, then you understand way more about business than the average adult. If you didn’t, welcome to the club. So what can us non-entrepreneurs do to support Black- and Brown-owned businesses?

Support Black and Brown Businesses Krystal Covington, Western Governors University (WGU) distinguished alumni, marketing consultant, and founder of Women of Denver, alongside Edwards, shares more insight into how consumers and allies can change the game of business: INCREASE AWARENESS Take photos and share on social media. Show people who you support, and showcase it. Don’t showcase it as a Black business, but as the amazing enterprise that provides great value that it is. REVIEWS Reviews help SO much. Leave good reviews to help advertise. BECOME A CONNECTOR Make opportunities available by connecting people at the right time, especially when it comes to mentorship. BRING PEOPLE INTO IT Take people into the world of Black business, and share your support for those spaces.

He found mentors, got back into higher education, and moved into the realm of virtual learning. He also worked with businesses along the Front Range for the University of Colorado. As he sat with CEOs and other corporate leaders, he noticed that in all of the boardrooms he was in, no one looked like him. He was always the only Black person in the room.

OFM culture

• “Improve access to credit for Black businesses. Twenty percent of Black Americans start businesses, but only 4 percent survive the startup stage.

On top of this, he witnessed his daughter struggling to reenter the workforce, unable to land a job. Determined to create access in a white-dominated space, his next business, Invizibee, was born. Invizibee “(advances) Black and Brown professionals through the leadership pipeline by helping businesses and organizations attract, retain, and develop professionals of color.” Covington, a distinguished alumna whose efforts went above and beyond the requirements and who’s made a significant positive difference in her community, got started in business in undergrad by selling lace wigs. Her dad invested $1,000 to get her started, and she steadily grew until more affordable wigs became widely available. Then, it crashed, and she had a financial mess on her hands. She realized that selling things on eBay wasn’t enough, but it took a while to regain her confidence to try again. She went back to school for her MBA. She wanted to have something to help her feel like she could do it again. At the time, she was working in marketing in the Detroit area and attending WGU online. She chose WGU because they’re competency-based. She wanted to focus on the skills and knowledge specific to her goal, not credit hours. Her most salient memory, she says, is when “they provided group projects where the group simulated a business and I pretended to be the CEO. It helped with my confidence, having failed and feeling terrible. It gave me practice to understand all the different angles I’d have to think from in order to succeed in what I was trying to do.” After graduating, she got amazing job offers in Colorado, including tons of marketing opportunities. She searched for community and support here within the state, but couldn’t find what she was looking for, so she cultivated her own networking platform. Women of Denver “helps women connect with each other so they can develop new friendships, partnerships, and business opportunities. The result is a thriving group of leaders who learn together and share resources to build an economy of mutual support.”

These suggestions come both from study and experience. Both Edwards and Covington are entrepreneurs who have not only faced challenges themselves, but also strive to transform the business ecosystem. Edwards currently oversees a nine-state region with WGU, but that’s just his day job. One of his first big engagements occurred back in 2009 when he opened a restaurant by Denver’s Coors Field. It lasted 18 months before it closed. He says he didn’t have the confidence and made a lot of mistakes. “Closing is a reflection of what I didn’t know,” but he didn’t give up. outfrontmagazine.com 25

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Through these connections, she received coaching that helped her understand she could turn Women of Denver into a business. “Often people from under-represented communities don’t feel like they can do it. The journey of failing and regaining confidence through education and mentorship gave me what I needed to thrive.”

in mastering competencies, not tests. They operate virtually for flexibility, so you can accelerate at your own pace; just know that you’ll have to prove your mastery before you graduate.

The Small Business Development Center provides “no-cost consulting and low-cost training and workshops to entrepreneurs in every county across Colorado.” Bring your financials, and Resources for Black and ask them how to meet your goals, like paying yourself what you want. They Brown Entrepreneurs also help with analysis, valuation, Before we share resources to support access to capital, human resources, your next venture, here are a few words marketing, contracts, and more. If they of wisdom about mentorship: can’t answer a question, they’ll connect “Build relationships through you with someone who can. voluntarism and being vocal about what you’re doing,” Covington advises. Denver Public Library for their “When you’re seeking out mentorship, BizBoost appointment service. “This give before you get. I supported friends service allows for an entrepreneur and first, which connected me to other a BizBoost librarian to set aside a time friends. Find someone you want to to review relevant resources and how support you and ask, ‘How can I help to use the library’s subscription tools you?’” to do business research. The BizBoost She also suggested formal mentorship service is geared mostly toward new programs, but warned that mentorships entrepreneurs who are already in the aren’t always consistent. “I met many process of creating a business plan or of my mentors through introductions established business owners seeking to from friends, then sitting down with expand their market.” them for one to two hours getting Colorado Black Chamber of valuable, free information.” Sometimes Commerce “provides extraordinary that one meeting can be all the time you customer service, reasonable member need. rates, and value-added resources. It works with other area chambers Edwards agrees, “Put yourself in spaces to give members a broad range of where you’ll meet the type of people opportunities for networking and you need. Build relationships, and tell visibility. It’s more than a business-asyour stories. Always ask someone to be your mentor, and be specific. It doesn’t usual membership organization. It’s the have to be any particular way, but know best friend and partner of its members, where you wanna go; put yourself in working exclusively on their behalf and providing the assistance and support those spaces, and be specific.” they need.” Western Governors University Operation HOPE focuses on provides affordable, equitable “financial dignity and inclusion. (They) education so people can reach their equip young people and adults with highest potential and dreams. WGU the financial tools and education to is committed to improving equity in secure a better future—coaching them the education community by helping through their personal aspirations and people of color earn degrees and life’s challenges, and facilitating their high-paying jobs that will transform generational wealth. WGU also comes journey to financial independence.” with mentorship, including academic The Commons of Champa “runs success and career coaching. The on shared ownership.This incredible mentor model is built right into their community continues to give expertise, offerings. By offering competencytime, funding and volunteerism based education, they support students to build and support our rich

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entrepreneurial community. (They) empower entrepreneurs to master their business and build lifelong relationships through the experience of servant leadership with the top business minds in and around Denver.” CrossPurpose is “a nonprofit organization abolishing relational, economic, and spiritual poverty through career and community development.” They help low-income families and individuals get on the right track with tuition-free training, assessments to help you see where you could succeed, and surrounding you with support. “At CrossPurpose, you’ll find the training you need to get certified and start working in a new career that pays well and offers benefits and advancement opportunities.” Mi Casa Resource Center “creates pathways to opportunity and believes in the potential of all people. (They are) committed to closing the prosperity gap for women, minorities, immigrants, and families with limited resources, helping them achieve success in education, employment, and business ownership.” Kite + Dart Group works “with entrepreneurs that see their businesses as tools for transforming the world. (They) call those folks entrepreneurial activists. (They’re) experts at helping entrepreneurial activists like you create customized business development strategies that work–without forcing them to do things that feel awkward, weird, and ineffective.” The best part? They’re “committed to working with everyone who shares our commitment to transforming the world through business, whether they are just starting out or at the top of their game” and their offerings definitely back that statement up. Rocky Mountain MicroFinance Institute “creates the space for communities and people of all backgrounds to realize their unique potential through the power of entrepreneurship. (They) invest in entrepreneurs’ personal and business development through a proven mix of classroom, coaching, capital, and community.”

r e t n i

L L BA

not another power nap. We will, we will rock you.    1 | 22 | 2022

O N S A L E N O W : W W W. D I V E R S I T YA R T S F O U N D AT I O N / W I N T E R B A L L

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Make Your Yuletide

eed a reprieve from the Holiday craziness? Come escape into the historically accurate, gorgeous world that is the Molly Brown House. Best known to millenials from her cameo in Titanic, played by Kathy Bates, Brown was famous for marrying a gold miner who struck it rich and rising in the ranks to make her own legacy at 1340 Pennsylvania St. in Capitol Hill. From there, she was active in suffrage and women’s rights movements, contributing to the feminist legacy in Denver. Fast forward a few decades later, and the house came into the possession of Art Leisenring, who rented his home out as a “men-only” boarding house, creating a safe haven for gay men in Cap Hill. He held onto the home until the 1970s, when he moved, and then the home was in danger of being torn down. Before the worst could happen, Leisenring helped rally a group who called themselves Historic Denver, Inc. and fought to save the home and turn it into a museum. Today, OFM pays homage to the space with a special photo shoot featuring OFM employees and local drag personalities Shamy Lee and Victoria Page Mathews. We lived our opulent fantasy for a day and truly made the space merry and gay.

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gay Photos by Julius Garrido

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‘Twas the Night Before Christmas, My Nails were on Point

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Mystery Under the Mistletoe

his gorgeous photo was provided to OFM by the Molly Brown House. The keepers of the house don’t know who the women are or where the photo was taken, but they were dedicated to the home in the 1970s, when interest in historical preservation of Cap Hill and its queer history was on the rise. We like to speculate that these two women planned a special photo shoot to escape societal norms for the day and live out their gender euphoria in these savvy suits.

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OFM gallery

'Twas the night before Christmas, and my nails were on point If you’re looking for some of the most impressive (pun intended) press-ons out there, you need to work with Yuri SerratoCano. The nails she created for this shoot—and the work she brings to any shoot or custom order—is nothing short of breathtaking, with use of real gold leaf and crystals on her sparkling creations. As of now, her books are closed to everything but press-ons, but when they open back up, she also does a mean gel manicure. Find her over at Reign Rituals doing her thing, and follow her on socials to see all her awesome work.

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PREMIUM SELECTIONS

OFM gifts

Terrapin Prerolls Don’t leave home without your pack of trusty Terrapin pre-rolls! These small-but-mighty joints pack a serious punch, and though they aren’t the giant cones, they keep their shape and last all the way through for a cohesive smoking experience.

1906 Genius Drops The 1906 Genius Drops are the perfect gift for the gay-mer in your life! Featuring a combination of rhodiola and bacopa for brain power along with the energy stack of caffeine, L-theanine, galangal, and theobromine plus a micro-dose of 2.5 mg THC/CBD, the Drops will help you level up like never before. Whether they’re stocking stuffers for the multi-tasker who goes and goes or the gay-mer who fuels up for play, these are a must-have.

QUEER

THE LGBTQ SHOPPING GUIDE: Everything You Need, Want, and Desire

HOLIDAY

Select Elite If you’re looking for a luxe live resin experience, look no further than Select Elite: Enhanced Live Resin, infused with freshly harvested, live-resin terpenes. Every concentrate enthusiast will love the potency along with the sleek style and design. The combination results in high-quality, high-potency oil with a wide variety of strain-specific flavor and effects—so sativas feel more stimulating and indicas more relaxed. Indica or sativa lovers can appreciate the Kush Master strain of this smooth, live-resin cartridge. It offers minimal scent with all the flavors of traditional flower. Whether for yourself or someone else, this is a hightech concentrate gift perfect for plenty of vape sessions in the cold winter months.

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This holiday season, it’s time to shop local! From your friendly, neighborhood cannabis shop to your local candle makers and artisans, don’t miss this list of vendors you absolutely must snag some gifts from.

Aktiv Hygge is a Scandinavian term that embodies the concept of relaxation, and Aktiv has enough stylish and functional pieces that their name might as well be a synonym for it. As I sat nestled on the couch in their RAW joggers and Morel full zip hood, drinking my cup of tea, and watching horror movies, I almost felt like I was wearing a second skin. I will 1,000 percent be buying from Aktiv in the future so I can really get my hygge on. Find them online at aktivstyle.com

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Craving a delicious drink? Not wanting to play mixologist? Crafthouse Cocktails has the solution for you. They provide pre-made cocktails using only the finest of ingredients, crafted by World Champion Bartender and Crafthouse co-founder Charles Joly. I tried the spicy margarita and was oh-so-excited to not have to worry about having a perfect-tasting drink every single time. Not only did it save me time when my friends came over (the cocktails come in single-serving cans and party boxes), but my friends all remarked at just how delicious the drinks were, and bonus: they provide an ample kick with every sip. visit crafthousecocktails.com to find out where you can purchase your next favorite cocktail.

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Crafthouse

cktails

Young in the Mountains When my husband and I were looking for wedding rings, we both knew for sure that we wanted something more unique and flashy. Enter Young in the Mountains. They make jewelry for every hand and are special because they only use American-mined inlay stones and are actively working to be the most responsible and ethical jewelers they can be. I have often found it difficult to find rings that are a bit daintier. (And that’s just my style!) Luckily, Mariele and her team over at YITM were able to give me a ring-buying experience that was as comfortable as it was easy. So, whether you’re looking for a ring for your love, or even to show yourself some self-love, you can visit younginthemountains.com to scope out your next jewelry purchase, or head in store where the YITM team can give you a jewelry buying experience like you’ve never had before.

Connect for Health Colorado Give yourself the gift of health insurance! Connect for Health Colorado is the state’s official health insurance marketplace. It is the only place Coloradans can sign up for a private health insurance plan and apply for financial help to lower the cost. Due to the American Rescue Plan, there is more financial help available than ever before. If you do not get health insurance from your job, Connect for Health Colorado is for you! Open Enrollment is now through January 15, 2022. Visit ConnectForHealthCO. com today, and click on “WE CAN HELP” to find free help enrolling today. outfrontmagazine.com 33

PREMIUM SELECTIONS

OFM gifts

Iconi All too often, I end up with activewear that’s not made to be ... well ... active in. Iconi stuck out to me as different. When I work out, I work out hard, and Iconi’s iconic pocket shorts and “Level Up” tee held up to the task of all of my jumping, squatting, pulling, and twisting. As a plus, when I purchase my next workout shirt from them, I can feel good that my money will be going somewhere great, as 10 percent of Iconi’s profits are donated to nonprofits. Visit iconileggings.com so that you, too, can buy activewear that has a purpose.

Dry Land Distillers Harlem of the West Have a hookah lover in your life? Try Harlem of the West’s very own herbal shisha. In fact, the owners themselves worked to test and provide a nicotineand tobacco-free formula which is not common in the traditional hookah world. Their shishaologists capture the essence of the past and the aspirations for the future in each blend. They have one- or three-pack options available and offer exclusive signature blends of nicotine- and tobacco-free herbal shisha.

Dry Land Distillers has some wonderful choices, even more so than your typical distillers. These two bold options, Colorado Antero Wheat Whiskey and Dry Land Distillers’ Cactus Spirit, are delicious and leave you wanting more. Even though I’m a major fan of whiskey, I found myself loving the Cactus with a smokey, vegetal sweetness reminiscent of tequila! Both of these are great in a mixed drink or, if you prefer, they can also be tasty shots. Dry Land offers whiskey, gin, and rum, and don’t forget about their mezcal-style Cactus Spirit. No matter what spirit tickles your fancy, Dry Land always brings their a-game.

Mooselabs MouthPiece Smoke sessions have changed since the pandemic came into play. The usual comradery of smoke sessions with a group of friends has long gone. But, thanks to Moose Labs, we can sesh responsibly with their line of MouthPeaces! Each MouthPeace comes with its own custom-fit filter that uses activated carbon filter to provide a safer and cleaner smoking experience that’s free from germs, resin, and tar. The Original MouthPeace is used for bongs and dab rigs, while the MouthPeace Mini is used for joints, blunts, prerolls, and vape pens. A gift for stoners of all kinds, whether alone or with others. 3 4 OFM DECE M B E R 2 0 2 1

The

PREMIUM SELECTIONS

You might be familiar with The Clear Concentrates vape cartridges, but this holiday season, consider mixing it up and adding in their wax-infused pre-rolls. While delivering all the potency, purity, and flavor of their concentrates these pre-rolls are perfect for a snowy night in. Spending time with relatives or friends and want to take the discreet route? The Reserve disposable vape cartridges are a smooth alternative. Pop into your local dispensary for a gift that keeps on giving.

oncent r a t rC

OFM gifts

Cle

Golden Leaf Botanicals Golden Leaf Botanicals is Colorado’s top quality kratom dispensary. One of their wonderful products is Snow Cap, and it can really add a pep in your step. Make sure you only take the amount that works best for you. Snow Cap provides a calming sensation that really puts your mind at ease. All of their products offer the potential of holistic living. The Snow Caps aren’t too big and are easy to swallow. Make sure you give them at least 20 to 30 minutes to kick in. It’s also suggested to take the capsules with a tasty juice like pineapple or orange. Golden Leaf never sells your experience short.

Billion Dollar Art Gallery Not everyone can make it to the museum these days—You may not have the money or care to deal with the lines. A perfect way to bring all that beautiful art into your very own living room is with the Billion Dollar Art Gallery USB! You can turn your very own TV into a work of art, or, in fact, many works of art, thanks to this wonderful USB drive! The collective art that is displayed is breathtaking. This is the perfect gift for any art lover, and it’s so beautiful it’s almost like you’re seeing the work in person.

Wana Optimals Need a gift to start the New Year off right? Try Wana Optimals, a new line of cannabis-powered wellness solutions from one of North America’s leading edibles companies, Wana Brands. Made with advanced fast-acting technology, Fast Asleep Gummies deliver a custom blend of sleep-promoting cannabinoids, terpenes, and melatonin in just five to 15 minutes! And daily, nonintoxicating Fit Gummies harness the rare cannabinoid THC-V to curb cravings and reset eating habits. Visit wanabrands.com/optimals to optimize your gift-giving game!

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STEAMY SELF-CARE

OFM gifts

Mentionables Lingerie

Shawn Johnson’s “Mentionables” line is a great option for a sexy-but-comfortable lingerie set. The silk fabric has the ability to stretch and be flexible while accentuating every curve. I appreciate the fact I was able to match two different sizes for the bralette and panty for the right fit. The two-piece set along with the robe was a lace-silk dream. It’s a set that can be worn on a spicy night in or underneath your everyday attire.

Virgins on Fire Candle Co. Santa’s First Wife Candle connoisseurs, this one is for us. Virgins on Fire Candle Co. is coming in hot with their 100 percent soy candles, each homemade, with its own humorous name to match. My personal favorites include “Fuck it, I’m Buying a Cabin” and “Santa’s First Wife.” Besides the rad packaging and badass names, the candles themselves pack a strong punch. My entire studio was filled with the scent even from their smallest size.

Shinesty

It’s a real pleasure to find comfortable underwear that also offers fun patterns and isn’t afraid to push the risqué line. Some of the designs can make you blush, and some are ready for the merry and gay festivities. With the holiday season quickly approaching, don’t wait to get your favorite pair of Shinesty underwear. These underwear come with a supportive and cupping pouch to help ensure your chestnuts wont roast when the temperature drops regardless how many clothes you put on.

T-Bo

It’s never easy to find a great pair of underwear that feels as soft as they claim to be, but T-Bo can totally make that statement. These underwear are made from Bamboo Viscose, and the feeling of comfort is everywhere it touches the skin. Wearing these can really help you be a bit prouder of your pal down below with the enhancing fabric that perfectly cups the goods.

Cabeau Incredi-Belt

Sitting at your desk isn’t always fun. Being hunched over can put a strain on your back. Even when you love your job and you’re at a desk, over time, your back will let you know it’s had enough. But you can fix it with the Incredi-Belt! When you wear this easy-to-strap-on, inflated belt, you can’t help but to sit up straight (or sit up gay, you do you). It’s a crime to not give your back the same amount of love as you do your job, if not more. Incredi-Belt is light and mobile and very easy to prepare. All you have to do when you get your very own Incredi-Belt is pump it up with air, and it has a built-in pump to help you do that.

Shower Steamers

If you’re not a bath person (looking at you, germaphobes), I’m right there with you, and I’m here to tell you the shower steamers from Cleverly are a game changer. Just pop one in the shower, and elevate your self-care game, as the color and steam from the big, pretty capsules makes your shower bright and fragrant. A must if you want to get decadent while you wash (but not in the bath)!

CANNABIS CORNER

Cheeba Chews THCV-Infused Chocolate Taffy

Ripple Quick Sticks

If you want a cannabis treat that won’t give you the munchies or make you panicky, you need to try this special taffy. Infused with THCV, or tetrahydrocannabivarin, this treat is great if you’re trying to stay healthy and energized, or if regular edibles tend to make you panicky. Plus, the doses are super reasonable at 5mg of THC and 2.5mg of THCV. There’s also a little caffeine boost in each bite.

Whether you’re looking to add some of the Quick Sticks Pure to your water, or spice up your nighttime tea with the mint chocolate Quick Sticks powder, these infused sticks are perfect for on-the-go consumers or those who like to medicate in a way outside the norm. Whether you’re knocking them back Pixie Sticks-style or simply adding them to a drink, you can’t go wrong!

Le Remedie, Calming CBD/THC Cannabis-Infused Body butter Le Remedie’s calming body butter does not disappoint. It boasts a lightweight formula with a silky smooth finish that can be used all over. With a 1:1 ratio of 300mg THC and 300mg CBD, this can be used after a hot bubble following a long day, and it’s also still light enough for everyday use.

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CANNABIS CORNER: CALIFORNIA DREAMIN’

Dr. Greenthumb’s Insane Flower Line The legendary hip-hop artist B Real, of Cypress Hill fame, and owner of Dr. Greenthumb’s dispensaries, is introducing a new line, Insane, featuring carefully curated strains that act as a testament to the rapper’s commitment to the very best cannabis strains. I tried the Holland Space Cake, and after I rolled the ground-up flower into a joint and lit up, I immediately took a mental note of the sweet flavor, shortly after settling into a state of bliss as my joint slowly vanished—not too sleepy or heavy, rather, the perfect evening-time smoke. If this is what we can expect from the rest of Insane’s strains, then sign me up.

Kanha Sugarplum Gummies Who doesn’t love a quality, infused gummy AND a festive spin? Visions of sugarplums surely danced in my head after eating Kanha’s seasonal offering, with the usual, fast-acting effects one can expect from Kanha products. From what I can tell, Kanha nails the flavor, which I can only describe as a mix of darker berries with a hint of nutty sweetness. An hour after eating a couple of these, I was surely ready to cozy up to a fireplace or a classic holiday film. They’re a must-have for Californians looking to celebrate the season with a toasty treat!

Jetty 1g Solventless Cartridges

Jetty just rolled out their one-gram solventless cartridges, offering a stellar terpene profile that highlights their top-of-the-line extraction methods. Jetty’s extraction methods help to remove impurities that contribute to flavor degradation, and the method also boosts potency. The flavor was immediately noticeable (as was the 84 percent THC). A must for vape pen users who don’t want to ignore flavor and quality.

Jetty Solventless Hash Infused Pre-rolls

Flower lovers can still enjoy Jetty’s solventless hash without using a vape pen. Their cold water hash pre-rolls are great for any smoker who wants a little extra kick. The flavor, like with the cartridges, was a highlight as well. Some infused prerolls feel a little too heavy, but Jetty’s infused prerolls smoked smoothly, the hash flavor complementing the flower’s flavor without being too overbearing.

OFM gifts

While many Californians are still soaking up the sun, getting full use out of their fans and AC units, the holiday season is surely upon us even though it might not look, or feel, like it. The California cannabis market has a plethora of goodies that are perfect for whatever kind of celebration you’re embracing in the Golden State this year!

Baker’s Infused Kief and Oil Pre-rolls Baker’s infused pre-rolls now come in convenient packs of three, .8 gram joints, coated with terpene-infused distillate and THC-rich kief that greets the user’s eyes as the package is opened. The flavor was great, each joint burned impeccably, and each strain was very true to its lineage— Peach Ozz’s sativa lean kept me motivated and energized through the day, while King’s Cake was a great hybrid that I feel I could flexibly use to fit my own day and needs. Great to share with friends, or as a little holiday treat for yourself !

Glass House F/ELD Extracts Live Resin/Diamond-infused Pre-rolls Glass House Farms have created a stellar line of pre-rolls with their family brand, F/ELD Extracts, resulting in a jam-packed smoking experience. The five-packs of joints contain no distillate, refinement, CRC processing, or added terpenes, but the live resin and diamond infusion surely packs a punch. If the flavor doesn’t grab you (the Papaya Tarts was incredibly tasty and true to the name), then the potency sure will.

Vibes Fine Rolling Papers: The Cali VIBES is a joint venture (in more ways than one) between Greenlane and Berner, an influential rapper and the CEO and founder of Cookies. The Cali embraces a larger diameter and offering three different sizes—one gram, two grams, and three grams. I couldn’t help but think how useful the larger optionswould have been during parties in the past or events coming up. I absolutely had to split the threegram J into a two-part session for my solo enjoyment (and felt fully like a cartoon character puffing on the comically thick joint), but I was impressed with how evenly each Cali burned. Even better, these are available nationwide and online at Greenlane.com! outfrontmagazine.com 37

CANNABIS CORNER: CALIFORNIA DREAMIN’ OFM culture

2-in-1 Perfecto Infused Preroll Perfect has reintroduced their 2-in-1 Perfecto prerolls: double-sided, .75-gram pre-rolls made to cut to size to save for later or split with a buddy. The company offers three tailored experiences, with Nightcap, Happy Camper, and Pick Me Up selections. Perfect surely knows their stuff: Each blend delivered its promised effect, though none were overbearing (i.e. I wasn’t immediately passing out with the Nightcap or bouncing off the walls with Pick Me Up). As someone who often takes a halftime break with infused joints to begin with, I appreciated the option to come back to a second half later on. It’s also a great option for a date or gift for a loved one.

Platinum’s Pina De Los Muertos

Spooky season may be over, but it’s never too late to honor the dead. Platinum ‘s Pina De Los Muertos is a great way to do so and still keep the holiday cheer goin. This tropical flavor with a hint of spice pays tribute to the Mexican snack of spiced fruit, and the unique flavor and 10mg dosing is all you need to have a really great holiday season while staying connected to those who came before you. If you prefer to snack instead of spark up, don’t miss this treat.

Eyce Oraflex Pipes I’ll admit, I didn’t have any glass in my possession upon receiving the Eyce Oraflex pieces, not because I don’t enjoy it, but because I’m clumsy (and I’ve broken all of it). For people like me, these pipes are perfect, made from two layers of platinum-cured silicone. There are also 20 variations of hand-painted colors and designs, and until you actually handle the pieces, you wouldn’t even know they aren’t made of glass. It’s a perfect gift for a cannabis consumer who can’t be trusted around glass or anyone looking for a unique and fun piece!

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DaVinci IQ2 Vaporizer While the convenience of vape pens and cartridges are always welcome for anyone on the go, the DaVinci IQ2 vaporizer takes things a step further, offering the ability to vaporize dry herb and concentrate, precision temperature settings, a rechargeable battery, and portability. The DaVinci also allows for adjustments that promote cooler vapor, even settings that can customize the airflow and report stats, like vape dose per draw and per session. It’s a completely customizable, convenient experience that smokers far and wide will surely enjoy. 3 8 OFM DECE M B E R 2 0 2 1

1800 Wazee Street, #100 | Denver, CO 80202

OFM reads

‘SEA, SWALLOW ME’ AND OTHER STORIES’ Rises and Falls, but Always Remains Rooted By O’brian Gunn

first heard about Craig Laurance Gidney while looking for queer, Black, male San Francisco authors. (Hella specific search parameters, but I’ve got specific reading tastes.) Sea, Swallow Me and Other Stories’ cover, waves crashing underneath a man’s head, instantly grabbed my attention. It’s a short-story collection that mirrors its cover: foaming with highs and lows and half-glimpsed depths that bewilder and bewitch in unexpected ways. I’ll start by saying Gidney’s collection has a lot of typos and some formatting issues. The (mostly) reformed grammar snob in me couldn’t help but feel irritated by this, but I’ve realized that typos don’t always reflect the author’s talent and dedication to the craft. Gidney’s sprawling imagination and blend of stories lull the reader into his worlds while tight, musical phrasings play out on the page in words rather than notes. The first story, “The Safety of Thorns,” is the tale of a young slave who finds a devilish mystery in a plantation’s briar patch. Gidney weaves images of nature through his lines like a network of ivy. It’s here the reader gets the first glimpse of the writer’s meditation on falling from God’s grace and letting the Devil not only catch you, but fortify you. The main character believes sipping spirits will send him to Hell, but that changes when he witnesses the power gained

from drinking liquor received from a man who’s definitely not a certain fallen angel. In “Etiolate,” a jaded Black man named Oliver struggles to find his place in goth clubs that simultaneously reject and fetishize his Blackness. Gidney trades verdant images of nature for sensorial descriptions that use music as a narrative catalyst. The story takes the reader on a hallucinatory journey that blends horror and intrigue during Oliver’s carnal encounters with white men. I couldn’t help but be reminded of Samuel R. Delany’s writing style while enjoying the piece. “Her Spirit Hovering” missed the mark for me. The main character buries his mother while exhuming accounts of her narrow-minded judgments, prejudices, and controlling behaviors. Exploring how we haunt ourselves with memories and how remembrances become lingering specters intrigued me. Unfortunately, I felt the story was a shallow exploration that didn’t take advantage of its opportunities. The next story, “Come Join Me,” gave me whiplash with how quickly it brought my doubts to a screeching halt. A boy emerges from a fever with the ability to see auras and spirits, an ability passed down through the family. The language reminded me of James Baldwin’s, lyrical and moving. With the importance that

music and musicality play in many of Gidney’s stories, I wanted a playlist to listen to while reading his work. Gidney explores delightfully weird and interesting places. Even though I didn’t like every story in this book, I finished them all. Usually, if I don’t connect with the characters, the story, or the writer’s style, I won’t hesitate to not finish a book. It’s clear to me why Gidney’s story collection became a Lambda Literary Awards finalist. The book also served as a pleasant reminder of why it’s worth it to check out books from small, independent publishers like Lethe Press. They publish lots of queer books, and I plan on exploring more of their offerings. If you’ve ever wondered what Lil Nas X’s “Montero” music video would look like fragmented and scattered across multiple speculative fiction stories, check out Sea, Swallow Me and Other Stories. Gidney’s work explores the acceptance of someone else’s version of Hell and a turning away from traditional divinity in favor of the power of the profane. No matter what you think of his stories, they’re sure to make you diabolically divine. outfrontmagazine.com 39

The Importance of Holding Space for World AIDS Day

dental care, insurance navigation, case management, syringe exchange, and housing and nutritional Sponsored Content assistance. CHN has continued December 1 reminds us to pause meeting the needs of the community in recognition of the global health throughout the tumultuous 2020 crisis that continues to impact our and 2021 COVID-19 pandemic communities. World AIDS Day has by providing many programs via been observed each year on this date telehealth and by adapting any since 1988, when it began as a day necessary in-person services to of remembrance to the many lives improve safety for both clients and lost to AIDS-related complications staff. and to serve as an urgent call to The impact of HIV and AIDS was action for research into prevention devastating to an entire generation, and treatment options as well as the particularly in the early days before search for a cure. the advent of effective treatment Colorado Health Network is proud options. Since HIV was first to join in the tradition of observing identified, over 35 million people World AIDS Day this year. Recently, worldwide have died from AIDSCHN hosted the Red Ball fashion related complications. While a cure benefit in support of Coloradans for HIV continues to be elusive, living with HIV. Red Ball raised funds incredible strides have been made to continue supporting Coloradans in treatment and prevention. HIV living with HIV and ignited awareness today is a treatable condition which about World AIDS Day. CHN provides means effective management can be resources to Coloradans living with achieved for many by taking a onceand at risk of acquiring HIV, including daily pill. prevention, and testing services, By starting treatment quickly and PrEP (Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis), remaining in care, people with HIV behavioral health care, medical and

can expect to live full, rich, and healthy lives. We know today that Undetectable=Untransmittable, or U=U: a person with a suppressed, undetectable viral load has zero risk of transmitting the virus. Finally, the advent of Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis, or PrEP, means that by taking daily medication individuals without HIV can drastically reduce their risk of acquiring the virus. World AIDS Day provides the opportunity to celebrate advances in treatment and prevention, even as we remember those we have lost and advocate for more effective strategies to treat HIV, eliminate stigma, and reduce the continued spread of the virus. Today, there are laws to protect people living with HIV, and we understand so much more about the condition. Despite this, each year in the United States, over 3,000 people are diagnosed with HIV, and stigma and discrimination remain a reality for many people living with the condition. World AIDS Day is important because it reminds the public and government that HIV has not gone away—there is still a vital need to raise money, increase awareness, fight prejudice, and improve education. World AIDS Day is an opportunity to show solidarity with people living with HIV and to remember the lives lost to AIDS-related complications worldwide. We invite you to join Colorado Health Network in the fight against HIV by supporting programs and services that Coloradans living with and at risk for acquiring HIV depend on most. You can learn more about Colorado Health Network and the work we do by following us on Facebook, Instagram and heading to https://coloradohealthnetwork.org/ for additional news, updates, and events.

OFM culture

The Many Layers of Hailie Sahar by Denny Patterson Photos by Rem West

n actress, writer, TV personality, and nurse,Hailie Sahar is one of several trans women who broke barriers by starring in FX’s critically acclaimed series Pose, which featured the largest LGBTQ cast in scripted television history. Created by Ryan Murphy, he wrote the role of Lulu Ferocity specifically for Sahar. Sadly, Pose officially came to an end in June after three seasons, so Sahar is now looking toward a bright and successful future. In addition to releasing an upcoming memoir and debut music, she is set to make a leap to the big screen by starring as trans trailblazer Sir Lady Java in a featured biopic. Java was a staple in the Los Angeles nightclub scene in the 50s and 60s who fought the city’s Rule No. 9 ordinance, which made it illegal for performers to impersonate or dress as members of the opposite sex. Sahar will also serve as the film’s executive producer. Growing up in L.A., Sahar has always had a passion for acting and performing, but overall, she considers herself a storyteller. She may have had to overcome many challenges while trying to find her place in Hollywood, but the fire in her heart made her persevere. OFM had the pleasure of connecting with Sahar to talk more about the final season of Pose and its significant impact, her upcoming projects, and how there is more to her story than just the trans experience, which is what usually first meets the eye.

I would like to begin by talking about Pose, which unfortunately, has come to an end. How meaningful has it been for you to play Lulu, and what have you taken away from this experience? It has been extremely beneficial for me to play Lulu because I am mirroring a lot of our community, and I know that representation matters. It’s only in seeing yourself or seeing someone like you, are you able to channel that energy and then believe that you can do things or feel that you are a part of this world, that your voices are being heard. What I have taken away from this role is a great deal of activism. I was always an activist, but I think my drive is just so much stronger. I am much more self-aware of the platform and privileges I have now, and it’s just about determining what I am going to do with that platform and those privileges. I want to help our community, and even beyond the LGBTQ community, I want to help the world in general. Did you ever think the show would become such a groundbreaking success? Not to be boastful, but I knew that any subject matter that is as dynamic, specifically the trans or LGBTQ experience, is such a strong topic. I knew that it would definitely make some noise. Where we are now in our generations and our time on this Earth, we are into talking about the realism of what’s really happening in the world and really getting to the bottom of equality. Making that our reality. So, I knew that the subject matter itself was going to be something that caused attention, but I will say though, I didn’t know it was going to be as huge of a success as it has been. That is something that made me feel happy because I am also a person of trans experience, and just knowing that our voices have so much impact, it speaks to the times. o u t f r o n tm a g a z i n e.co m 41

OFM culture

Although Pose has pushed Hollywood to evolve, slowly but surely, do you think the show has made any impact on our current social climate? Definitely. I think entertainment is one of the strongest vessels to our social climate, and I believe that Pose has influenced a lot of that. I have seen a lot of it in everyday society. I see a lot more confidence in people, and I see a lot more conversations happening. That does not mean that every conversation that needs to be had is happening, but that does mean that some conversations are starting and progressing. It is a step in the right direction, but to be very frank, it’s a baby step in the right direction. There’s so much work to be done, and I know that my voice matters. I have to be very selective with the way that I personally word things. So, it is a step in the right direction, but we have so much more to go. Do you believe Pose has helped boost respect for the ballroom community? Definitely! When you know your history, you know your history, but a lot of mainstream Hollywood has pulled inspiration from ballroom, and we have seen it in a lot of artists. I know we mentioned it on Pose, referencing Madonna, but even with artists like Beyoncé, who I love and adore. We have seen it with a lot of artists throughout history, so now it’s a good feeling to know that the notoriety is being more in the forefront, and not in the background. Now that Pose is over, you are focusing on several new projects including a debut album and memoir. What can you tell us about these? My album is still in progress, but my single that I am going to release is completed. We were going to initially release it before the pandemic happened, which I publicly announced on my social media, and when the pandemic happened, we had to reroute and go a few different ways. Now, some new ideas have come into my head, and I want to incorporate those things. The song itself, we are looking to release it, hopefully, sometime after Christmas, maybe for the new year. I am really excited about that. As far as my memoir, that’s been in progress for the last two years. I have been doing a lot of soul searching and really figuring out what messages I want to share. I know what that message is now. It’s a plethora of things, and the base of it is something that the community, more specifically, needs to hear. Also, for me, it has been therapeutic because it’s me letting down my guard. As I said earlier, I have a lot of layers to myself. What you see or what the eye meets is not always what’s really going on with me. So, it has been very therapeutic for me to unfold that, peel back that onion, and allow myself to be vulnerable, which is something I have never done. I am very private and notorious for that, but this is new for me. I’m excited about that. You will also make the leap to the big screen in a new upcoming biopic about trailblazing trans performer and activist Sir Lady Java. Can you talk more about that? I am so excited! As I stated earlier, I am a storyteller. I have been writing and producing since I was a kid. My grandfather had a church; he was a pastor, and I started my journey of creating stories there. He allowed me to take over the annual Christmas plays, and all the inner-city kids would come and be cast in these plays, and I was always in them as well. I decided one day, I was like, “Papa, I want to take a shot at writing the next play.” He allowed me to, and it was such a great success that I did that for about four to five years. I have always been a storyteller, and it just spiraled. With Java, I am excited to tell stories authentically. I

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am excited to build my production company, Sahar Productions, and the products that will come out of that. I am excited to step into that position. That has always been my goal, and acting was something that I knew would get me to that place. Acting is something I love and will always do, but producing is really where my true passion is. I love producing, I absolutely love it. Java herself, she is the moment. If you don’t know Java, without Java, myself, my fellow cast members, RuPaul, a lot of people that you see, Lil Nas X—They would not be able to work the way that they do because Java changed the law allowing us to dress the way we want to dress and present ourselves how we want to in a workspace. She changed Rule No. 9, so telling her story is vital. She was the first woman of color of trans experience to be noticed and respected by Hollywood. Being featured in films and connected to the likes of Lena Horne, she is such a classy, old Hollywood glamour, and her story is profound. The fact that we don’t know about her, maybe we want to talk about it. I did not know my history. Oftentimes, as trans individuals, we don’t know our own history. Visibility matters. If I don’t know that I come from this dynamic woman, and I am an offspring of that, I don’t know how dynamic I am. Therefore, I want to channel that and tell that story. Then getting her blessing to, first of all, have her friendship, which I will cherish with my whole heart, and have her be one of my trans mothers—I have three—but beyond that, having her trust me to tell her story and portray her in the film is one of the biggest blessings that I do not take for granted. It’s going to be beautiful, and it’s going to be sickeningly amazing.

with anyone’s sexuality. They deal with everyday conflicts.

Photos courtesy of Netflix

MAKING THE YULETIDE SEASON MERRY AND GAY WITH NEW ROM-COM

Michael Urie by Denny Patterson

Ho, ho, ho! The holidays are getting a little bit gayer this year. Netflix is set to release Single All the Way, a Christmas-themed romantic comedy that features, for the first time, a gay romance at its center. In a genre that has seen increased calls for inclusion, the film stars out actors Michael Urie and Luke MacFarlane, as well as LGBTQ favorites Jennifer Coolidge and Kathy Najimy.

What have you enjoyed the most about being a part of Single All the Way? Having your mom be Kathy Najimy and your aunt be Jennifer Coolidge, that is nothing to sneeze your gay nose at (laughs). I have only had the opportunity to be the lead in a movie a few times, the main guy, and there is something very satisfying, rewarding, and thrilling about being there every day and having a real arc. I have been in movies where my character shows up here and there, but to be there throughout the full movie, the experience is so full. You really get to know everybody on the cast and crew, and you get a sense of the whole movie. Not just your part. It was great.

According to Urie, Single All the Way has everything one would ever hope to see in Do you think we are progressing when a Christmas movie. it comes to seeing LGBTQ characters “I hope when the movie is over, people and themes in holiday films? clink their eggnog, squeeze each other, We are not the first gay holiday movie, and say that it was great,” he says. but this is the first gay holiday movie “There’s Christmas sweaters, Christmas for Netflix, who are really into that trees, hot chocolate, hunky Santas, a genre. They make a lot of Christmas and little bit of deception, and a whole lotta holiday movies. Lifetime and Amazon do-gooding.” have dabbled, so I think it’s happening, Urie, who rose to fame with his breakout but obviously, the hope is to eventually role in ABC’s Ugly Betty and is well-known not differentiate between a gay holiday for his numerous Broadway credits, took movie and a holiday movie. In the some time to chat more about the film meantime, I think the novelty of being the with OFM. He also touched on some first is good and worth commenting on. favorite holiday memories; the return Christmas movies that include LGBTQ of live theatre; and how he and his people is a great step, and an exciting partner, actor and producer Ryan Spahn, one, and our movie is not a coming-out stayed creative while locked down in story or deals with homophobia. The quarantine. problems do not have anything to do

I loved Christmas as a kid because of presents and no school, but then there was a period where I didn’t love Christmas. Once my sister had kids, it became fun again. Then I met my partner, Ryan, and his family is obsessed with Christmas. My family loves Christmas, and we decorate and all that stuff, but Ryan’s family is bigger, and they go allout. When we got together 13 years ago, that is when I started to really love Christmas as an adult, and I guess it is now my favorite holiday. Plus, there’s a whole genre of music! During the pandemic last year, we played Christmas music all the time, and it was great. We loved it. There is nothing else quite like it, and no other holiday has its own genre of music. That is pretty special.

OFM culture

Is Christmas your favorite holiday?

In addition to acting for film and television, you are a highly acclaimed Broadway performer. One of your current projects is playing Logan Leibowitz in Chicken & Biscuits. How excited were you for the return of live theatre? Super excited! I was very lucky to be in a play that closed about 10 days before the shutdown, so my time away from the stage was the length of the shutdown. I love theatre so much. Broadway, off-Broadway, regional, musical, Shakespeare—I love it all, and I love being on stage and having that connection with the audience. There is nothing more visceral than the relationship between a performer and audience member. Especially in comedy. This play, Chicken & Biscuits, is at the Circle in the Square Theatre, which is essentially in the round. The audience is almost on all sides of us, and the show is about the funeral of the patriarch of a Black family. I am the elder son’s white boyfriend, and I am a fish out of water at this funeral. I play a Jewish person who has never been in a synagogue, let alone a Black church. I always thought this was a cliché thing to say, but I actually feel blessed to be a part of this production right now as Broadway returns with this group of amazing artists. We have over 30 Broadway debuts happening, and Chicken & Biscuits is a kind of play that has never been on Broadway before. I know it means a lot to many people, and I am super proud of it. I am glad people are seeing it. outfrontma ga zine.com 43

OFM drag

The Other Side

of Kimora Blac by Denny Patterson Photo courtesy of Kimora Blac Hoping to reconnect with his masculine side, Nguyen is ready to show the world that he and Kimora are a package deal. He spoke more with OFM about how he has been silently battling to balance the two identities for a while. What made you feel like now was the time to open up about your personal struggles with discovering who Von is? It has been a journey, and there have been lots of questions within myself. I am 33 years old; I have been doing drag and playing with makeup since I was 16, and I was around 13 the first time I put on makeup. Growing up in that aspect and environment, I don’t want to say I was confused or wasn’t sure of myself. I knew who I was—an Asian American boy that is feminine and loves makeup. Luckily, I was very blessed to start doing shows and drag.

e all know Kimora Blac as an iconic contestant on Season Nine of RuPaul’s Drag Race and a prominent beauty influencer, but do we know much about the man behind the makeup? Don’t worry, neither does she.

Outside of the drag lifestyle and online persona, Kimora is known as Von Nguyen—a husband, son, and proud gay, Asian American man. In October, she released a 20-minute video on YouTube sharing her journey and personal struggles of discovering who Von truly is. Creating Kimora has provided Nguyen a shield from rejection and fear, and he has lived most of his adult life behind the eccentric and confident personality.

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I worked at a cosmetic store my whole life, and then becoming a contestant on RuPaul’s Drag Race, I have always been around makeup, but living life in drag has almost become a daily occurrence. It is getting to a point where I am almost having an identity crisis because I barely see myself out of drag. It is to the point where I don’t even go out the door or go out to a social setting out of drag, unless it’s something like dinner with my partner. I have received a lot of questions asking if I am trans, if I am

transitioning, and what I go by. I am more than just my drag persona, but who is on the other side of the makeup? I get so stuck and almost insecure to show myself as a boy. I am so used to Kimora, this person I created to hide my insecurities. I created her to be the ultimate “woman” that I want to be. However, I am stuck in the middle because I don’t want to be Kimora permanently. I don’t see Kimora when I am, for example, going to the gas station or getting coffee. That is not my lifestyle, so that told me, no, I am not trans. That is not who I am as a person. I talked to several of my trans sisters and asked, “Have you heard of a story like mine before?” They were like, “No. This is different. This is an identity crisis where you are almost living a double life.” So, I talked to my team, and they were like, “Go for it.” This is something that needs to be said because it is almost unheard of. Has the video received a positive response? Surprisingly, yes. I have had so many colleagues of mine and people that are kind of suffering from the same thing. It’s incredible because I didn’t know if my issue was an issue, but a lot of my colleagues have said, “I go through the same thing; I don’t know what to do out of drag; I work in it 24/7 and have no idea how to even act without being on stage or in that performance armor.” I am not a vulnerable person, but I am very happy I did the video. This has been very therapeutic as well. Starting to find myself is a good feeling. Like, am I going to live this cartoon, make-believe lifestyle that I created, or am I going to finally be who I am,

be true to myself, and find out who Von is? It’s insane because I don’t even know how to describe myself to people. Introducing myself in a public setting, it is almost awkward because I don’t know how to act. I am a proud Asian American, feminine boy, but it is hard to present myself like that to the world because of all the insecurities that I go through.

Holidays TREAT YOURSELF FOR THE

Can you talk more about how Kimora initially began and manifested? She began because I was very scared of being gay. The only gay person I knew was me, and I am calling it gay because that’s what everyone would understand it as, but I knew I was definitely not the same as everyone else in my class or family. Back then, you were either a boy or girl. I didn’t know trans, nonbinary, or any of these other terms because we really didn’t grow up with them. We didn’t read books that explained it, and social media hadn’t evolved yet, so you couldn’t really educate yourself. I started doing drag and getting into makeup being like, I am going to be a girl, then I created Kimora by the time I was 18 because I started doing shows. For some reason, when I would have on a wig and dress, I was more accepted. It was as if it was OK for me to be feminine and gay if I had a wig on, versus me just being a gay boy. I wasn’t your typical hot guy; I wasn’t your typical buff guy or anything like that because that wasn’t my interest. My interest was being fully feminine, and I loved it, but it was more OK to be that in drag, because everyone lives for you. I got so addicted to that lifestyle that I ran with it for years.

STOP IN TO ONE OF OUR 10 DENVER METRO LOCATIONS. THE DIFFERENCE IS NIGHT AND DAY

o u t f r o n tm a g a z i n e. co m 45

The Push of the Pop-Rock Band by Veronica L. Holyfield

alking on the phone with rock-pop trio PHNTMS’ lead singer Alyssa Gambino was like being on a call with a longtime, good friend: no introductions needed as we dove right into an easy conversation. Shooting the shit about their new single, the irritation of social media, and being an independent artist in the music industry were just a few topics we touched on. Gambino is raw; she’s real; she’s uncensored; she’s unconventional, much like PHNTMS. On the ridge of reinvention, PHNTMS have made some major moves in the direction of a rebrand. Not that it was necessary, since their previous releases firmly and confidently stood in the landscape of arena rock meets magnetic melodies; however, the band is ready for bigger, better things, and with that comes a fresh take on its former sound. The band started as an accidental formation between Gambino and guitarist Adam Jessamine, who were both in separate music projects at the time but decided to join forces. Bringing finished songs to a prepaid studio session, Jessamine had Gambino do what she does best and belt out over the tracks, and in that moment, PHNTMS was created. The band released two singles in 2019, “Foreign Places” and “Hotel,” and while they loved the feeling of playing music together, they found themselves nestled in a genre that didn’t quite feel authentic. Gaining traction and attention by the 2020 release of single “Back Burner,” PHNTMS had been classified as a loud, rock-pop band with assertive guitar hooks and a hard aesthetic. Oftentimes, the music overwhelmed the powerhouse vocals of Gambino, and even though the band had recorded an

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Photos courtesy of PHNTMS

OFM music

PHNTMS

entire album worth of music, the pandemic hit and shut down the opportunity to release and tour. This also gave the band a chance to reevaluate and drive forward what was working and shed off the excess skin of what wasn’t. “This time, we’re doing it right,” Gambino explains as she talks about how the songwriting process has evolved. “We were all very cohesive, and I fell in love with songwriting in the process, but pop music is the hardest music to write. There’s a whole art to it, and everybody says it’s just simple, but writing in that simplistic way is super fucking hard. And to translate it into a way that people will like, and there’s a hook.” In the fall of 2021, the band released their newest single, “Paper Flowers,” and, I must say, it delivers exactly what Gambino is referring to. As I was preparing for my conversation with her, I listened to the song no less than two dozen times, each time getting it more embedded in my mind as an exciting new direction that is going to take the band to the next level. The intro guitar and drum beat sucks you in, and immediately, you want to hear more. Gambino’s voice soars above the music and taps into a classic, soulful, radio-worthy vibe. The Kelly Clarkson-like, high-energy hook leans into what we love most about pop music, while the band stays true to its rock ‘n’ roll sensibilities. With each time the song came on repeat, I nestled into the relatable storyline of a struggling love that is either going to wilt and diminish, or come back to life and flourish. With lyrics like “Too dark to bloom / too many chances, we crack and crumble but / I’m here tonight / so hold tight

but you have to put it out in the world. I believe in my heart that people are gonna like it; you have to just keep going because if you stop and question it, you’ll give up immediately.” The upcoming EP featuring “Paper Flowers” that is expected to release in 2022 is a list of five solid, pop bangers that continue to tap into the new PHNTMS sound. Replicating what works for the first single, the driving beats, climbing vocals, and elevated musicianship is showcased in a unique way on each track. Finding a producer that revealed a new style of songwriting for Gambino, Jessamine, and drummer Mikal Smith was art-changing, and the music is evidence that the band has found their stride. Now, it’s getting in front of audiences and finding that support and push from outside those who already love and believe in them. “I feel like we’re always like a second too late; we always miss it just by a little bit. But, we’re trying. There is no solid answer. Nobody’s saying in, like, five years you’re gonna get a record deal, so just hang on. Is a record deal even a thing anymore? Why is social media shit important? Is that what people want? “It’s just, like, a lot of questions. You just have to keep going even if you do question it like, ‘Why am I in the industry?’ Because I absolutely love it. You have to love it so much that it’s what wakes you up every day,” Gambino says.

“You have to believe in your own shit.”

OFM music

‘cause the sun is coming up” and “Are you giving in, giving out / giving up, shutting it down / or going strong?” PHNTMS tap into the feeling of an indecisive, uncertain, tug-of-war love, and I’m here for it. The glue that binds PHNTMS together at this stage in their career is the agreement that they are all churning out hit after hit with one goal in mind: to build the fanbase that connects to the heart, soul, and vibe of the music. The new direction is intentional, a siren’s song of straight-forward pop music that beckons listeners to eagerly devote themselves to the fandom. However, seeking that audience in the current social media vortex is only a diversion in attention, Gambino says, straying away from the music and demanding more than ever from the artists. “I mean, we’re sitting on a bunch of songs right now, and we’re super excited, but it’s all about how you play the game. We could drop them tomorrow, but there’s so much involved in this, and we’ve just been let down so many times. The songs are there, you know, but it’s a very aggressive industry, bigger than music. Music isn’t enough anymore; it’s just a different world now, even from 2015 when we started the band,” Gambino explains. With platforms like Instagram and TikTok, musicians, actors, and creatives have become their own paparazzi, and to be seen is to be liked. Gambino says that it’s no longer about the music first and then the persona, it’s getting people to buy into the persona and then they are willing to give the music a chance. Attention is divided on social media, and snippets of 20 seconds to one minute cover songs get far more traction than original songs that take time to swell, breathe, and crescendo. However, PHNTMS is up to the task of playing the game because they know the new songs they’re sitting on, like “Paper Flowers,” are gold. The constant feedback loop of social media and the undelivered promises of the industry can be taxing, and Gambino relays her frustration that, while the music is strong and the band trusts that the songs are solid, they just haven’t been able to catch their break. Never being one to hold back her opinions about life, love, and the industry, she is also an out, LGBTQ artist and believes in using her art and her platform to be a positive and uplifting voice for those who need it. Shying away from who the songs are about is not her style, nor is giving up in the drive to push the music forward and get it in front of as many people as possible. So, what keeps her going, even when it feels like PHNTMS is up against the odds and the brutal music industry, social media, and the pandemic have created roadblocks, speed bumps, and potholes in the road to success? “There’s like this underlying, like, ‘Fuck you,’” Gambino asserts. “You have to believe in your own shit. The songs are there; they’re great. I’m my favorite band; I listen to my shit all the time,

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OFM music

OFM NEW MUSIC This month’s must-catch new releases from the artists you already love and the musicians you need to know.

Gyda

Arca

Marissa Paternoster

Kick ii

Peace Meter

Gyða Valtýsdóttir, aka Gyda, releases her much anticipated fourth album, OX. Traversing between a vast spaciousness and the tender intimacy of our inner world, the nine genre-fluid songs of Ox were begun in the solitary depths of a Brooklyn winter. By turns both visceral and wildly sublime, Ox celebrates the embodiment of both the darkness and the light that exists within us. Through soaring cello and Gyða’s celestial vocals, the listener is led to look for meaning in the worlds that exist both within us and around us.

The highly anticipated fifth studio album by Venezuelan record producer and singer Arca, Kick ii, is releasing as volume two of a four-part series. The transformative vision is broad; the concepts are unique, and the deconstruction of sounds is illuminating. Heavy on backbeats, vocal manipulation, and craziness, Arca explores a quantum state of existence as it rests soundly on the deliverance of her ever-evolving craftsmanship and creativity. Releases December 3, 2021.

The prolific guitarist of Screaming Females is releasing brand-new music sans moniker and is making a statement. Peace Meter is the final project of collaborations after a year of isolation, panic, and uncertainty and finds the artist landing in a space of refinement. Resonating with sounds of melancholy while tapping strongly into the heavy guitars she is widely known for, Paternoster’s haunting lyrical stylings paired with her somber timber brings home a sense of longing for the forgotten.

Monsta X

Moses Sumney

Neil Young and Crazy Horse

The new live album from GhanaianAmerican singer-songwriter Moses Sumney encapsulates the literal and interpretive spirit of the 2018 release, Aromanticism and 2020’s græ. The soulful crooner’s alternative, indiefolk leanings come through in funky, beautiful arrangements of the formerly released songs, while offering a fresh, new perspective after years of growth and imagination. As an exercise in re-intergrating with nature, the artist reclaims the vibrance in which a grey world comes alive. Releases December 10, 2021.

There’s one amazing thing that came out of this hell year, and I’ll fight anyone who isn’t stoked: everyone’s favorite, tried-and-true duo of Neil Young and Crazy Horse is back in 2021. Featuring harmonica, soft guitar, and lilting and personal vocals, Barn is everything we hoped for from this release. While it may not be the most timely music to spin in this year of our lord, the attention to detail still showcased decades on from their first collaboration proves it is timeless. Releases December 10, 2021.

Releases December 3, 2021.

The Dreaming The K-pop group with worldwide acclaim releases their Englishlanguage album, which is a continuation of their first Englishlanguage debut album, All About Luv. Monsta X showcases their ability to lean into good vibes with soaring ballads, mid-tempo beats, and energetic bangers. With the spirit of the global connection that is the language of love through music, the evocative new chapter of Mosta X is craftfully demonstrated through The Dreaming. Releases December 10, 2021. 4 8 OFM DECE M B E R 2 0 2 1

Live From Blackalachia

Releases December 3, 2021.

Barn

o ut fr o ntm a g a z in e.co m 49

OFM style

Beauty Beat

Winter

Skin Savers by Angel Rivera

by Angel Rivera

e all know that during the fall and winter, especially in chilly Colorado, our skin tends to feel its most dried out and fatigued. Why is that, you may be wondering? With a combination of the altitude and the arid climate we have, it’s quite the battle to help keep our skin supple and looking its best. That is why I am here: to help you find the products and regimen you need to kick your skin’s parched look and keep a glowing complexion all season long. Anyone looking to mend dry skin or simply repair its moisture barrier will want these tips, which also help to keep 5 0 OFM DECE M B E R 2 0 2 1

away signs of aging. Say “au revoir” to flakes and dullness and hello to hydration. If you are someone with skin that is already dry yearround, you are most likely susceptible to flaky, dull skin. When dealing with the old skin, we want to make sure we are exfoliating to help remove the old layers of dead skin, either physically or chemically. First on the list, we have Clinique’s range of clarifying lotions. These solutions are made to help lightly sweep skin, pollution, and grime away, keeping you radiant and ready for the next step in your skin routine. The clarifying lotions are formulated for different skin types, ranging from extremely dry to ridiculously oily, and will make sure skin is fresh and new when putting on your treatments. Another amazing chemical exfoliant for your troubles comes in the form of Sunday Riley’s Good Genes all-inone lactic acid treatment. This wonder in a bottle not only gently exfoliates the top layer of skin but will reduce the look of pores and minimize fine lines and wrinkles while simultaneously bringing a fresh glow to your skin eachand-every day. Chemical exfoliation on the skin can seem a bit scary, or maybe you enjoy the physical aspect of removing the skin from your face. If so, I have just the thing from Dermalogica the Daily Superfoliant. It’s a micro black powder formulated without parabens or fragrance to help you scrub away tiny old skin and imperfections. The superfoliant is gentle enough to use daily; it contains rose oil to help moisturize skin, as well as rice bran extract and lactic acid to help your skin stay smooth long after the physical part is over. Now that we have dull skin cleared away, let’s talk about barrier repair. When we talk about the “barrier” on your face, we are talking about the acid mantle or protective layer of skin filled with fatty acids and ceramides, helping fight off unwanted bacteria and harsh climates. This is an important role for helping regulate your face’s pH balance as well as fighting acne and, of course, dryness. StriVectin, a company known for their antiaging and wrinkle-reducing skincare, has one such product packed with vitamin B3 that helps alleviate any moisture problems you may have. With a prebiotic that helps target your skin’s microbiome and their one-of-a-kind vitamin complex that helps target dryness, fatigue, and even rosacea, this serum is sure to bring a new light and bounce to your skin. If you prefer a simple routine and want to just cleanse tone and a moisturizer, then Paula’s Choice has you covered with their Barrier Repair Moisturizer and Retinol. A nightly moisturizer that not only helps your skin’s barrier with a clinically proven mix of antioxidants and creamy texture but a 0.01 percent retinol that will help combat any early signs of aging and increase firmness to the skin. This product has a rating of over 4.5 stars on reviews from Amazon and Sephora, so it’s no surprise people are raving about the moisturizer. When all is said and done, your skincare routine all comes down to what you want to do for your skin and what can be used to help. Make sure to read over ingredients and do some research on what can work for your skin type. We can’t all afford a dermatologist, but we can all afford to take care of ourselves. Stay healthy, and make sure to treat your skin as kind as you should treat yourself.

Get the look

COLD-WEATHER FASHION TIPS TO MAXIMIZE STYLE by Angel Rivera

r te

TOPS: Hop on the sweater vest train that s • hood ie has TikTok e-boys in a death grip, s make sure to grab a pattern that will

• ca

capture the eye. To compliment the loud pattern on the sweater, make sure to wear a solid color head-to-toe that matches either the trimming of the sweater or your favorite piece of the pattern.

This creates a cohesive color scheme that brings the eyes around the fit and back onto the sweaters pattern. For chilly days, pair this look with a formfitting, thermal shirt under the sweater vest that will show off arms and create a sexy conservative look for those extra cold days.

l rt

rdigans •

enecks • Sw

With winter in full effect, it’s time to get ready for a new era of fashion. Just because the weather has become harsh does not mean that our fashion has too—Taking the time to dress for the weather doesn’t always have to be so blasé.

• jumperS

•

JEANS: If you are someone that likes to wear solid color sweaters as your daily but hate the frumpiness when paired with sweatpants, what you need is a pair of flare jeans to vibe without sacrifice. Comfy hip huggers give you a chance to still show off body while creating the illusion of longer legs, giving your sweater that added boost. ACCESORIZE: The best fall/winter accessory is no doubt the scarf, capable of pulling together an outfit or adding a layer of warmth. If you spend most of your days in meetings or in a suit, it would be a great idea to invest in a satin scarf. Cool touch while insulating the heat, the glossy texture and compact nature of the satin scarf can be used to hold back hair, kerchief the neck, or be used as tie, a la Camp philosophy.

T a k e

GET KNITTY: Pair knits together with unique patterns, pops of color, and inversions of the color wheel. Pick a palette and then get adventurous with a coat and no shirt, or keep it classy with a dress shirt or turtleneck under tweed. Either will add dimension to the neck and chest area, drawing eyes upwards toward the face.

t h e

r e d

p i l l .

w w w . c h r i s t o p h e r l a f l e u r a r t s . c o m

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OFM style

THE BODY MODIFICATION INDUSTRY NEEDS TO BE MORE INCLUSIVE by Keegan Williams

e talk a lot about major, booming industries in the U.S. and their lack of accessibility for different groups, and while I have spent the last year in this magazine talking about the joy of all people embracing body modification, it’s my final Mods column, and that charming sentiment ignores that this industry is not without its share of issues surrounding inclusivity, or lack thereof. As I’ve aged and continued to embrace my queerness and transness, I’ve noticed my tattooing has unconsciously linked itself to those parts of my identity in the concepts I’ve gravitated toward. It wasn’t until I sat down to write this column when I truly thought over how important it is to me today to know I have an affirming artist and that the space I’m going to, to endure multiple hours of pain, is comfortable and affirming of my identity. Sometimes, the shift tattoo artists collectively made to Instagram makes this selection process feel fairly simple from a client perspective: I can see how the person speaks about their clients, the types of clients they work on, the subjects they tackle, and sometimes, I can see what an artist posts to their story that helps to show what beliefs they hold. However, social media is not reality; it’s a performance, and I find I truly come to understand how affirming or accepting an artist is when I show up to the studio. I think of the artist who tattooed my knees last year, whom I followed for a good year before I reached out and saw she was vocal online as part of the LGBTQ community and an ally to other communities. I knew from our conversation that her captions—truly grateful for the opportunity to adorn many folks with new art—and story posts were authentic.

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She started the session telling me to let her know if she did anything that made me uncomfortable, and that she would ask before touching me in a new area. It was nice to understand that, even though many folks assume I am a cis man based on my appearance, that my artist—my perceived or actual gender aside—made a conscious effort to ensure all of her clients were comfortable and had the space to communicate with her. Another artist I had followed for sometime and realized, following my move from Denver and his move from Portland, we ended up in the same city, his DTLA studio just 20 minutes from my Hollywood apartment. I’ll admit, I just assumed he was queer based on the content he often tattooed—very cutesy, vibrant images that I resonate with strongly (so much so I’m currently donning three of his flash pieces)—but it was a relief coming into the ecclecticly decorated warehouse space to see “pronouns” listed as a field in my pre-appointment paperwork. I don’t even remember what the topic was, but at some point, I even casually disclosed my nonbinary gender in relationship to our conversation during the appointment, and he didn’t even bat an eye; I didn’t either. It was incredible, and to be honest, it’s become my new standard. There is something invaluable about trusting the person who is collaborating with you to adorn your body with new art, and I shouldn’t have to put myself back into a binary I don’t fit into or watch how queer I sound, look, or act as that is happening.

And it makes me think back to artists I’ve worked with and cases where I maybe didn’t have that same trust. My entire right arm is tattooed by an artist whom I heard of through friends and family. While I’m happy with the art and still resonate with the ideas, I often look back at those appointments feeling differently. Not that this artist was antiLGBTQ: I think he cited that he had a gay brother, though his hypermasculine demeanor, the language he used in reference to other people, and often curt, one-to-two-word responses in conversation usually meant I was hardly comfortable talking about myself at all. As time went on, I eventually navigated away from the artist, feeling as though sharing anything other than silence was almost an inconvenience to his ears and the time I was paying for. I think about another artist— whom I would often engage in exciting conversations around conspiracy theories, spirituality, and the paranormal—and one appointment where conversation took a sour turn. He was talking about trans people and how the surgeries and hormones some folks embrace to feel more affirmed, safe, and secure in their gender expression bothered him. I fired back, asking how it affected him and how he has the license to speak to these issues, given that he is a cis man who hasn’t experienced gender dysphoria. He kept arguing with me as the needle going into my left arm seemed to hit even harder than before with his pointed tone. Finally, I told him that, while I’m happy we can chat about a variety of topics, that I am part of the LGBTQ community, I am a trans ally (and trans myself ! Though that was a conversation I didn’t fully have with myself until a year or so

later, mid-pandemic), that this is something we weren’t going to agree on, and I preferred we end the conversation. While the artist agreed, and the rest of the session continued fairly routinely—and I have to admit, his artwork is still some of my most favorite on my body—I often look at the pieces he put on me and can’t help thinking back to that 10-to-15-minute interaction and how, having sat through multiple appointments up to that point, I didn’t even know this artist held those views, let alone that he would make them abundantly clear to me as a queer client until I established a boundary. I don’t think it should be up to the client to filter out studios and artists that won’t be affirming, or to settle for studios and artists with the high possibility of ending up in an unsafe or uncomfortable situation. While tools like social media sometimes make it easier to seek out inclusive spaces, artists and studios need to be clear in their policies of inclusion and then put them to action when the appointments happen, including procedures that ensure action when safety is threatened by other employees and clients. Some tools, like the Queer Bodymod Compass, already exist to help LGBTQ folks seeking new body art to find affirming spaces. And, as we continue to see the variety of people continuing to embrace body modification, I see more queer body modification enthusiasts and tattoo collectors like myself, embracing selectivity in the meantime, and rightfully so. Tattooing and piercing— not to mention heavier mods—are intimate, bodyaltering procedures, and in accordance with the nature of this industry, body modifications professionals must get with the times in ensuring comfort and safety of all their clients.

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OFM cannabis

“Like, OK, you either have a girl on the phone, heavily tattooed taking dabs by a pool, or you have, like, farmer vibes, ‘Oh, we’re up here tilling the soil and, oh, beers! A cold one by the lake,’ and I was just like, ‘Alright, both of these are boring to me,’” Corwin recalls.

e n o t S Road

Embraces Small-Batch Cannabis and the Modern Consumer by Keegan Williams Photos provided by Stone Road

While the Stone Road website is beautiful and engaging, it doesn’t necessarily look like other cannabis web pages (and that isn’t by accident).

In the early days of Stone Road, he built his network for the brand around his real-life community, which was made up predominantly of LGBTQ people. When looking outside the tropes of the cannabis market, Corwin saw conventionally and unconventionally beautiful people of all shapes and forms, celebrating themselves on social media and in the world. To him, this is the modern cannabis consumer. Though, Corwin says, “We don’t want to be known as, like, the ‘gay company;’ we want to be known as a cannabis company that reflects the world as it is.” Corwin recognizes that gay people feel underrepresnted in mainstream marketing, but it’s a bigger, more intersectional conversation: How can Stone Road be accessible for everyone? In this aim, he says a lot of the content Stone Road embraces and builds their brand on simply comes from people who want to get involved. The vast majority of those people just happen to be queer—producing unapologetically queer content—though he notes that people began flocking to the brand innately over time, seeing themselves in it and wanting their voice to be part of Stone Road’s story. “What group of people can we tap into next that maybe people wouldn't necessarily think use cannabis, enjoy cannabis?” Corwin asks. “Just looking at the communities that are excited about Stone Road, and tapping those communities to see like what they have to offer, how we can collaborate—The whole thing that's just like extremely organic.”

Lex Corwin, founder of Stone Road, knew he wanted to get into the cannabis industry back in 2016, but as he crept further in, he knew he wanted to approach his brand differently than those he saw popping up around the state.

Corwin says the push and pull is so innate that the Stone Road crew rarely need to reach out for additional help from creatives and photographers, often receiving an abundance of support from folks who are naturally inspired to contribute to the brand.

As someone new to the ever-growing legal cannabis industry of California, Corwin didn’t see himself, or people within the LGBTQ community, reflected in the abundant advertising and marketing materials that have become increasingly visible through the years.

Stone Road’s approach to their brand and marketing isn’t the only thing that sets it apart.

Type in stoneroad.org, and you’ll be met with a delicate graphic of the cursive, gold-ribbon logo on the screen, the page prompting your cursor to “click to grow,” with each click prompting a small animal or plant emerging from the screen. The Nevada City, California cannabis brand’s packaging continues this aesthetic delight, boasting floral motifs and delicate accents that feel fully distinct from the modern-day cannabis market’s hard and heavy branding.

5 6 OFM DECE M B E R 2 0 2 1

“In the way that you’re doing 100,000 crops or 10 acres of greenhouse, you know—It’s just factory farming for cannabis,” Corwin poses. “It’s not going to really have that much personality. You’re not going to get a sense of the terroir—the property or where it’s coming from.” The company first launched in the medicalonly days, and once California moved toward recreational cannabis, Stone Road saw a shift, too. Advertising and marketing for recreational cannabis allowed Stone Road to shift away from the patient focus they previously had to more playful marketing. The pandemic also contributed to Stone Road’s growth, and while the brand is continuing to blossom, Corwin emphasizes they are still a tiny company, with less than 10 people, and that utilizing community is increasingly essential. “I feel like if we keep funneling money and product, and just generally good vibes, into the communities that we are trying to reach—you know, gay people, Black people, minorities in general—they're very attuned to who is on their side and who is not. And we want to just be overwhelmingly on their side,” Corwin says.

Part of that aim is also supporting those communities outside of the cannabis lens. Corwin grew up in New York City, and during the pandemic, Stone Road sponsored murals to paint over the plywood that covered many businesses throughout the city. He recalls another instance, when a Los Angeles nurse and customer reached out because she was getting evicted, and Stone Road helped her to secure safe housing.

OFM cannabis

The farm is 100 percent organic; it’s run completely off the grid (with nothing pulled through the county, water wheel, or city power); the packaging is 99 percent recyclable and made from 100 percent post-consumer recycled goods, and ultimately, they allow the plant to grow as intended, in small batches to fully give each plant individualized attention.

“We're not just a company,” Corwin says. “We're a group of individuals who are genuinely trying to do the right thing. And we're gonna do everything in our power to generally lift up the communities from which we came.” While Corwin says the industry as a whole still has a long way to go in regard to more inclusive marketing, he hopes that Stone Road can pave the way, ensuring that community members know they are seen and that their voices are not just heard but needed and mutually beneficial. Looking forward, Corwin is eyeing the New York market for Stone Road. Because the state’s market is essentially going from nothing to full recreational, he points out that extremely corporate, multi-billion-dollar companies will have the leg up. “We have to have some cool homegrown brands, too.” To learn more about Stone Road and their mission, visit their website, stoneroad.org, or check them out on Instagram @ stoneroadfarms.

THE TRIUMPHANT RETURN OF THE DENVER GAY MEN'S CHORUS

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OFM thoughts

A Queer in Recovery SOBER, SOBER CURIOUS, AND SOBER DEFIANT Hi, my name is ________, and I’m an alcoholic.

a strong desire to live a life where I can partake in alcohol occasionally, and I still live in the romance stage of how the buzz makes me feel. I am currently basking in a moderate amount of control over my drinking, and I clutch onto the notion that I will get stronger rather than weaker. However, no one knows how long this will last, and as many addicts know, it’s a progressive disease; it will get worse before it gets better. As of this week that I’m writing to you, I will begin an Intensive Outpatient (IOP) treatment program for substance abuse. It’s not something that I want to do; I don’t want to sit in group therapy and talk about my feelings and the reasons why I drink. I don’t want to be told that I can never have another drink again. I don’t want someone to try and nudge me into taking action toward fighting this disease. However, I know I have an illness, and I know I’m sick, so if IOP will help get me well, I’m willing to listen. I think that’s all we need is willingness, and that can be utilized toward so many areas of life. I became willing to find a medication regimen for my bipolar II disorder within the last month, and I have noticed a significant, positive impact in my daily life. I became willing to talk with a therapist about my disordered eating behaviors, and while I’m far from perfect when it comes to my relationship with food, it’s improving everyday. I became willing to talk about my trauma with friends, family, and clinicians, and while my complex PTSD will never be “cured,” the weight of what has happened to me is not as heavy. With all of this evidence at my disposal, I’m taking a step toward trust, inching closer to understanding myself better and changing old habits that no longer serve me. Will I ever regain complete control of my drinking? Probably not. Will I ever fully let go of the desire to drink? Probably not. So, which road do I choose? Recovery, or not? Sobriety, or not? Abstinence, or not? There remains a strong hesitation that makes me want to run from getting help for my alcoholism. I don’t doubt that I have a disease and an unhealthy relationship with alcohol, however, there is greater doubt that I will receive the tools, knowledge, and skills that will make the days I want to drink easier to ignore, the feelings of FOMO go away, and the romance of it all dissipate. The struggle is real, and yet I’m willing. As I mentioned, this may in fact be the final edition of A Queer in Recovery depending on if I’m truly sober. I can’t encourage folks to do what I’m not capable of doing; however, I can promise that I’ll continue to be honest, rip off the bandaid, and expose the truth about living an imperfect life as a person struggling with addiction. If you ever need anything, reader, I am here. I will listen. I will not judge. I am forever your friend, in and out of sobriety. Yours truly, A Queer in Former Recovery

As I reflect on the last year of writing A Queer in Recovery, I am surprised to find a strong inner conflict rise within me. Will this be the last installment of a column that brought me simultaneous pain and healing? Am I feeling more fulfilled or exponentially drained by sharing my experiences with substance abuse, mental health issues, and disordered eating? Has the inner work and stark honesty helped or hindered my journey, and do I want to continue being so vulnerable? Do the words that I write matter to anyone, and if they do, are they helpful? Has the fact that I’ve kept this anonymous been a way of keeping people at an arm’s length instead of connecting me to you through the darkest days of my life? I’m uncertain if I will continue to write about my journey through sobriety and recovery, and yet I also know that it’s through that vulnerability that I find that connection to others. Through hearing stories of people like me, I do find hope that life is better on the other side of addiction. So, here’s my truth today, at this moment, and perhaps someone else relates: I am resentful of my need to be in recovery; I am still drawn to alcohol with a greater desire than any pull toward physical health and holistic wellbeing. After my relapse in October, I’ve had a hard time getting back on the wagon. It’s a daily struggle, and it’s a battle I’m losing more than I’m winning. I ponder and worry, I wonder when will this episode of self-destruction end, and can I make it out alive, or will I be another casualty to addiction? Do I believe that I can drink like other people one day, and will the boundaries and barriers I have set around my drinking be sustainable? I’m a queer, but I’m not in recovery today, and so it feels like a lie to write any kind of tips and tricks that may help someone else get sober. However, I know them: go to meetings; get a sponsor; don’t surround yourself with people who are using; get a hobby; talk to those who care; seek medical assistance; take your meds, exercise, sleep, etc. … I continue to deny the guidance from those around me, and I’m unwavering in the notion that I can do this on my own. I may be a fool; I probably am. Isn’t that strange? For someone to choose a life of substance misuse over a life free from addiction is pure insanity. Although I already knew I was a little left of sane, the Email a.queer.in.recovery@gmail.com for additional support knowing of something doesn’t always result in action. I have and resources.

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outfrontmagazine.com 59

OFM lust

The Costume Room by Amanda E.K.

“I want you to make love to me like you would a woman,” said Julian, looking up at Dolly with shy expectation from the pile of multicolored pillows on their living room floor. They’d been lovers for one year, but they’d known each other since they were children. They’d played together like siblings—each other’s only friend during the Dark Years in their hometown, when their families got caught up in a religious cult in the Midwestern woods. The leaders of the cult required everyone to dress traditionally by gender—boys and men in buttondowns and slacks, and girls and women in floor-length skirts and dresses. The leaders regulated the community’s hairstyles, as well as their underwear and shoes, and if you strayed from the dress code, you were forced to endure a grim night in the horse stables, smelling of horse feed and manure for a week. When Dolly was 8 and Julian was 10, they came across a shed in the woods when they were running from the leaders who tried to whip them for giggling during prayer. The two children could never 6 0 OFM DECE M B E R 2 0 2 1

keep quiet when they were together, and thus were often seated at opposite ends of their classroom by their teachers. They learned to develop their own secret language so they could communicate from across the room. They’d blink once for yes and twice for no and tap their fingers in various patterns to plan where to meet after school. The shed in the woods was freshly painted and big enough to fit a car. It was the color of eggplant, with gold embellishments, and it reminded the children of some faraway land they’d only read about in story books. Dolly spotted a small window in the back of the shed that she could reach by standing on her toes. Julian lifted her up and she climbed through and let him in the door, where inside they found themselves surrounded by colors and jewelry and fabrics they’d only ever seen in their dreams. Suits and gowns and shoes and hats of every style lined the walls and divided up the room on metal racks. Speechless with awe and wonder, the children ran their hands over the finery, and with a look of knowing between them, they stripped off their community clothes and slipped into as many outfits as they could until the sun began to set. It didn’t matter that the clothes were too big for them. It was enough to feel the beaded tulle and stitched satin against their suntanned skin. With this newfound freedom to dress however they pleased, they found themselves drawn to the clothes they could never wear in

public. Julian selected sparkly dresses he imagined a princess might wear, twirling in front of an ornate mirror until he collapsed into happy laughter, while Dolly tried on a top hat, vest, and slacks that made her feel powerful enough to put the community leaders in time out. Fifteen years later, this remained their favorite memory, and they often returned to the costume room together in their shared fantasies. They’d never been able to find the shed again, though they’d gone looking for it as often as they could sneak away from the community. When Dolly was 12 and Julian 14, they escaped the cult together in the middle of the night. They entered the world as a team, then were separated when Dolly got work on the road as a dancer. Julian worked in warehouses and eventually became a teacher. One year ago today, fate brought them back together. In the middle of a crowded city bookstore, they’d found each other in the history section while reaching for the same book—Crossdressing in Context. Without words, they paused and looked wideeyed at one another, Dolly lifting her hand to touch Julian’s startled face. There was a light stubble there she’d never seen before. Julian closed his eyes in response to the softness of her fingertips and ran his hands through Dolly’s wavy hair with the affection and familiarity of a longlost lover. They embraced in front of the bookcase and have since spent every day by the other’s side.

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When catching up on their Lost Years, they discovered just how much the costume room had impacted their identities. Secrets kept hidden for years poured forth in each other’s presence, opening them up to a freedom of expression they hadn’t known since they were children. In the comfort of the small apartment they rented after their reunion (and painted purple and gold), Julian had confided something in Dolly that he’d never said out loud. “I like to wear lacy panties and thigh-high tights underneath my work clothes,” he said. “And sometimes a brassiere. They make me feel safe and self-assured when I’m out in the world.” Dolly ran a hand along his thigh, then traced it along her own and said, “I like

to dress up in tailored suits when I’m at home. And to wear cologne and boxers and a mustache. It makes me feel in control when life is unreliable.” After these confessions, Dolly and Julian dressed for each other in their favored clothes, dancing wildly in the living room, shaking out their shame and shivering loose their insecurity, as they reclaimed the lost autonomy of their youth. Dolly found the strength to explore her most authentic self in Julian’s presence, and Julian saw himself as whole when with Dolly. On this one-year anniversary of their reunion, Dolly knew just the thing to offer Julian on his path of p e r s o n a l exploration : a vibrating p - s p o t stimulator. With Julian leaning back against the p i l l o w s — his favorite dress around his hips— Dolly knelt down on her trousered knees between his legs and loosened his muscles with a lubricated massage. Julian sighed into the satin fabric as his entire body gave way to gratification. A moan escaped his throat when Dolly drizzled lubricant on the vibrator and then slowly, slowly penetrated him until it was all the way inside. The act of penetrating Julian filled Dolly with a sense of masculine control that she’d only ever felt while wearing menswear. Her nervous system sparkled with awe and confidence. What a gift to bring her lover pleasure in such a way—to help fulfill his wish to more fully embrace his femininity, that he may feel safe and self-assured in the hands of his most trusted friend.

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OFM lit

Part 2

Sins Of The Mother

The

ulogy

It began with a whisper in her ear. It was the faintest of whispers; so “Ugh, why? Isn’t there a strict entry time?” by Brian Aragon-Shafi faint in fact, that Marla Gray almost Gary complained. “I really don’t want to Byrdsong thought she’d imagined it. So, she sat be the one queer who ends up missing this buckled in the back seat of her best quote-unquote ‘party of the century.’ Can’t we friend Tanya’s car, quietly pondering keep it moving?” the existence of the faint whisper. Marla, “It’s getting louder. Is there something in the trunk?” Marla her friend Tanya, and three of Tanya’s friends were said. She pulled on the door handle and jumped out of the on their way to some exclusive end of year party that Tanya car before anyone else in the car had a chance to respond. had practically begged her to go to. After days of nagging, “Tanya, open the trunk.” Marla finally agreed. “Marla, listen, I hardly ever put anything in the trunk,” “So, how far is this party?” asked Gary, Tanya’s ex-boyfriend. Tanya said. Despite this, she still pressed the button on “It’s just up the road, but the invite to the party wanted us her car key and the trunk flung open. Inside there was a to drive a specific way to get there. It said we’d understand single red and white striped box, neatly wrapped with a why later,” Tanya answered. bow placed on top. Marla stared. Divya, Tanya, and Gary quickly joined. “Oooh, mysterious,” Divya, Marla’s on-again-off-again girlfriend said in a weird voice. They were currently not “Tanya, what the hell is this?” Gary said. dating, but Marla knew she would probably wind up in “Yeah, did you hide something in this box hoping to creep Divya’s bed by the end of the night. us all out?” Divya added. “Alright, so, who’s being my wing woman? I imagine there’s “I swear I didn’t. I don’t know what that is. Marla, open it.” going to be a metric ton of hot guys to flirt with and I need someone to be on the lookout,” Gary said. Marla was taken aback. She didn’t want to be the one to open it. She looked at the box, and then shot a questioning Divya began to say something, but Marla didn’t hear a thing. look to Divya. Divya scoffed. “If you think I’m opening That faint whisper had gotten louder, and this time, she that damn box, Marla, you must have me confused with was sure she’d heard something. She still couldn’t make out someone else.” Seconds passed and no one said anything what it was saying, but she knew it was saying something. further. Finally, it seemed Divya couldn’t stand the inaction. “Wait, do y’all hear that?” Marla said, interrupting Divya in “Fine!” Divya said. She took one step forward, grabbed the the middle of some speech she was beginning to make. box, and Marla watched as she slowly lifted the lid. “Hear what?” Divya said, slightly annoyed that she’d been The whisper turned into a scream, and not just the one interrupted. from Divya. There was a scream that seemed like it was “That … whisper? Is the radio turned super low or coming directly from Marla’s brain. Divya dropped the box something?” and in front of Marla’s feet rolled the head of Leigh Hapstall … the world’s richest woman … and Marla’s mother. Tanya checked the screen on her dashboard. “Nope, radio’s completely off. Y’all know how much I hate the radio, and I Marla screamed along with Divya, but as she did so, she hate y’all’s choice in music, so silence was the best option,” noticed a note attached to the box. She picked it up, still she said with a smirk. hyperventilating at the sight of her mother’s head, pale and rotting. “Well I’m hearing something, and it’s getting louder,” Marla said. The note read: Stop the car … STOP THE CAR. “Happy Holidays! You’re now the richest woman on planet Earth. I hope you enjoy your newfound wealth. “Stop the car!” Marla screamed. Gary, Divya, and Tanya all looked at Marla as if she’d cursed them, and then the car Love, Your Secret Savior.” came to a halt. 6 2 OFM DECE M B E R 2 0 2 1

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OFM

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