Feb. 19, 2014 :: Money

MARRIAGE EQUALITY CASES REACH UNCHARTED TERRITORY AS LAWSUITS PROLIFERATE, TIMELINE IS ANYONE'S GUESS • PLUS: UTAH LAWYERS CITE 'DIVERSITY' TO OPPOSE SAME-SEX MARRIAGE

Volume 37 • Issue 22 | 2.19.14 – 3.5.14 FREE | $3.95 Outside Colorado OutFrontOnline.com

LGBT ECONOMICS From spending power to stereotypes — the big-picture LGBT economy

OUT FRONT'S LIVING GUIDE YOUR RESOURCE FOR LIFE'S MAJOR MILESTONES

CAZWELL DISHES ON HIS NEW SINGLE WITH MANILA LUZON

GOING ON MEDS A TURNING POINT IN LIFE WITH HIV

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[ CONTENTS ]

VOL. 37 | ISSUE 22 | FEBRUARY 19, 2014

16 LGBT ECONOMICS From spending power to stereotypes — the big-picture LGBT economy

MARRIAGE EQUALITY CASES REACH UNCHARTED TERRITORY RAPID DEVELOPMENTS AND PLENTY OF SURPRISES ARE MAKING AN INCREASINGLY-HOPEFUL PATH TO NATIONWIDE MARRIAGE EQUALITY THROUGH COURTS ALSO INCREASINGLY TOUGH TO PREDICT • 12

[ FOCUS ]

Living

6 Letter From The Editor 9 FYI 10 Out In Colorado 12 News 14 Panel 16 Cover Story

G U I D E

YOUR RESOURCE FOR LIFE’S MAJOR MILESTONES

MONEY & SAV I N GS C A R E E RS & B US I N ESS LOV E & R E L AT I O N S H I PS HOME & AU TO

[ SOCIAL ] 22 Lesbian Socialite 24 Calendar 26 Cuisine 28 Arts & Culture 32 Radioactive Waste 34 On The Scene 36 Interview

+ The Denver Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce

B US I N ESS D I R EC TO RY

SPECIAL INSERT

OUT FRONT LIVING GUIDE YOUR RESOURCE FOR LIFE’S MAJOR MILESTONES

[ LIVING ] 36 23

BLEED LIKE ME GOING ON MEDS FOR HIV 4

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INTERVIEW ALL RAPPED UP IN CAZWELL

38 What We’re Wearing 39 Beauty 40 Urbanism 41 Big Toys 44 Sexuality 45 HeinzeSight

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FROM THE EDITOR

Seeing ourselves without stereotypes

MATTHEW PIZZUTI Editor

I

was a little nervous planning a cover story that would investigate economic realities for the LGBT community. This issue comes out just in time for tax season, and explores issues that are so important that there’s no excusable reason not to do it — but it’s a topic that brought a risk of digging up some complicated issues.

When it comes to the LGBT community and wealth, there are conflicting generalizations. On one side is this image of ambitious and successful gay professionals living comfortably in double-incomeno-kids households, with large disposable incomes in the most expensive neighborhoods for real estate in the country. On another hand is what our advocacy groups and activists are working to change when they talk about workplace discrimination, LGBT youth homelessness, income disparities and day-to-day hardships

that less-visible parts of our community face — especially among LGBT people in rural areas, trans people and LGBT people of color.

Out Front is funded by advertisers — which is why you were able to pick up this issue or click to read this column online for free. Companies that advertise need to know they’re making a good investment reaching an audience with the means to bring them business. At the same time, Out Front exists with a very intentional and foundational moral purpose of connecting and supporting the LGBT and allied community — the whole LGBT and allied community — including those whose realities and hardships are overlooked elsewhere and who rely on us to tell their stories.

When there’s a potential for your existential interests and moral purpose to be at odds, which side wins out? Everyone has to answer that question for themselves (and maybe only alone in the bedroom with the lights off and the door locked). But for us at Out Front, our responsibility is to the truth.

The truth we found brought the two pictures of the LGBT community together. We are a community that includes both influential and marginalized people, just like society as a whole. There are LGBT people who are extremely wealthy and there are LGBT people who are scraping by; most are in between, just like in society as a whole. To be honest, I don’t think this is going to be a surprise to anyone.

We also found a truth that the LGBT community, varied as it may

be, is an economic force to be reckoned with — we collectively spend hundreds of billions of dollars a year and are very loyal customers for businesses that publicly support equality.

That might be one reason why so many Fortune 500 companies were offering same-sex employee benefits years before marriage equality was popular in polls: the people paying the closest attention were ready to reward them for that choice.

One of the things I love about our community is when we treat each other like one family, and I think that in the LGBT community you find more chosen friendships and relationships that cross vast differences in wealth and income that you would find elsewhere — from corporate executives to starving artists, from comfortable stability to people who find themselves down on their luck and need a couch to crash on.

I’ve seen many examples of LGBT people rising to the occasion and being there for someone in a crisis, without disdain or judgment, either personally or through community organizations, charities and positive political causes. We’re a community that brings vast differences in life experience together, and one that really cares for each other — and it makes me proud to call this community my own.

2014

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About the Contributors

For Mike Yost there’s no such thing as being too loud. He interviews clamorous activists and clangorous nonprofits, uncovering the stories of those who aren’t afraid to stand up for change. Mike also listens to deafening metal. His fondness for vociferation comes from serving in silence in the Air Force under Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, his experience becoming the basis for his novel, Remnants of Light.

See his cover story on page 16.

Ashley Trego has been worshiping at the church of Baccus for more than 15 years and is of the firm belief that all water should be turned in to wine for access in kitchen faucets the world over. An Out Front contributor for travel stories and mixology tips, she enjoys reading softcore pornography, collecting pez dispensers, and baking for friends and family.

Find her new Queer Cocktails feature debut on page 26.

COMMUNITY VOICES

Letters, comments and reactions Wrong priorities I’m really disappionted that literary legend Armisted Maupin was scheduled to do a book signing at the tattered cover last night, and there was no mention or article about it in any recent issues of Out Front to let anyone in the community know. But, the local gay Republican shows up in every other issue. Great editorial priorities.

— Steve Keil RE: UTAH USES NOVEL ‘DIVERSITY’ ARGUMENT TO SUPPORT SAME-SEX MARRIAGE BAN February 18 • ofcnow.co/utahban Don’t let a progressive value be turned against us The argument by Utah is the same old-same old drawing from discredited studies on parenting and from age old sex role stereotypes. The difference, and what Prof. Leong misses, is that the appellants are attempting to hijack a progressive term/ idea and use it against progressive litigants-the gay families. There is no corollary (to appellant’s characterization of “diversity” in their brief) to the term’s use AND meaning in the context of education and work-place issues. By drawing the parallel in her rebuttal, Prof. Leong unwitting accepts the terrain, erroneous and dangerous that it is, constructed by the Appellants, who, quite frankly, are nothing more than purveyors

of distasteful canards, junk science, discrimination and I dare say homophobia.

— Kris McDaniel-Miccio, Denver RE: HIV/AIDS HISTORY THROUGH THE PAGES OF OUT FRONT August 2012 // ofcnow.co/AIDShistory It’s time to end HIV stigma It’s interesting to see this through the eyes of Out Front, even more startling is a conference for a now-defunct group People With Aids (PWA) whose Denver Conference (1983) established principles for AIDS patients. Among the Denver Principles was the Rights section which guaranteed HIV privacy, non-discrimination, living and dying with dignity, and full and satisfying sexual and emotional lives. In a day in which the death sentence has been removed for HIV, we should now remove the stigma.

— David Duffield, Denver RE: GIVEN THE SITUATION FOR LGBT HUMAN RIGHTS IN RUSSIA, WILL YOU WATCH COVERAGE OF THE WINTER OLYMPICS? February 6 • ofcnow.co/olympics The games should have been moved Why didn't they move the Olympics to someplace less controversial? They've canceled and moved

them before haven't they? And Russia didn't have this gay law when they were picked. But no I'm not watching this year.

— Seth Valkonen Watching for the sake of the athletes Even though I don't agree with the host country's policies, I still support the US athletes. I love watching curling and figure skating. I am watching a few events.

— J.D. Rigdon, Castle Rock Not one second Not even one second of it. And I will not buy one product with the Olympic logo on it. I feel bad for our own athletes that just want to compete and be supported by their nation but I just can’t give my time, attention or dollars to an institution or country this openly hateful.

— Alicia Decker, Denver

Community Voices is a section created for YOU, our readers, to submit opinions or perspectives pertinent to Colorado’s LGBT community.

Have something to speak out about? Email editorial@outfrontonline.com with “Community Voices” in the subject line to submit a 500-600 word piece.

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303.232.7932 www.lifestylescatering.com THE BUSINESS CASE FOR DIVERSITY FROM THE FEB. 5 ISSUE IBM exec Tony Tenicela talks about how to advance a pro-diversity workplace in Paul Collanton’s interview.

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PANEL: IS IT HARDER TO BE SINGLE IF YOU’RE LGBT? FROM THE FEB. 5 ISSUE: One of the liveliest conversations Out Front’s Panel has ever had, five members discuss unique challenges LGBT people face in breakups when who we love has so much to do with our identity.

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| FEBRUARY 19, 2014 | OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

FIVE LGBT FILMS YOU SHOULDN’T MISS

FYI

LGBT advocate from Pueblo seeking state House seat Esgar stated that as a lawmaker, out in Pueblo. “I’ve struggled my she will work to ensure that LGBT whole life, and I really didn’t acindividuals are fully aware of the DANEYA ESGAR ANNOUNCED LAST MONTH knowledge that I may be a lesbian protections put in place to protect SHE WILL RUN FOR COLORADO HOUSE for years – especially through high the community.

DISTRICT SEAT 46. If elected, Esgar will be the school. I kind of shoved it in the back of my head.” first openly gay state legislator to represent the “There are so many people who Pueblo community. just aren’t educated on what their In 2000, Esgar began work as a “I’m going to try my hardest to serve the people rights are,” said Esgar, adding that news producer at a local television of House District 46 as best as possible,” said Esgar, many hate crimes go unreported. station. When she ran a story in “The more people who are afraid whose district encompasses western Pueblo.

2008 covering California’s recto report any kind of a hate crime, “I really am a big believer in the community ognition of same-sex marriage, coming together to look out for each other. I’m a the less effective the actual law is.”

Esgar was questioned by several Pueblo native — so growing up and being raised co-workers about her intentions.

Pueblo’s education system is in a city that really feels more like a small town also a key issue. Esgar cited the She left her job a few months later.

Daneya Escar has been essential to building that idea within my findings of Colorado School Grades, “They wanted to know if I was Evan Semón • evansemon.com being biased,” said Esgar. “That’s head and my heart.” an organization which rated several when I decided I was never going Two years ago, Esgar was an organizer at Pueblo’s public schools low in acato apologize for who I was again.” the Colorado Progressive Coalition when she demic proficiency, growth, and college readiness.

Esgar encourages women and the LGBT comworked with the American Federation of State, “It’s definitely an issue here in Pueblo that County & Municipal is going to take the munity to become more politically active. “Nobody entire community Employees to estabis going to be fighting for us as hard as we will fight “I really am a big believer coming together to lish same-sex partner for ourselves. We really need to step up to the plate in the community coming together figure out how to benefits for Pueblo and push for what we need and what we deserve.” city employees. improve this system,” Esgar will run against former school board to look out for each other.”

She is currently said Esgar, adding member Stephanie Garcia in the local caucus that immigration president of the board for democratic nominee. The winner will face of the Southern Colorado Equality Alliance (SCEA) reform and bolstering small businesses were also Republican Brain Mater for House Seat 46. and volunteers as coordinator with OutFront, a essential in fostering stronger communities.

Colorado House Rep. Leroy Garcia is vacating SCEA outreach program providing support for The catalyst to Esgar’s advocacy work origithe seat to challenge State Sen. George Rivera LGBT youth in Pueblo. nates in part from challenges she faced coming of District 3. ¢

By Mike Yost

OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

| FEBRUARY 19, 2014 | 9

OUT IN COLORADO

Local effort creates credit card that gives back EqualityCard is like any other credit card, but will send money to nonprofits at no cost to user “I really have to give Nick a lot of credit because he has wanted PHILANTHROPY VENTURES, LLC to do this right,” Creager said. “I FROM DENVER WILL BE LAUNCHfelt a comfort level of having him ING THE NEW EQUALITYCARD ON present this opportunity bring a FEB. 24, a project that will allow whole new revenue stream to the anyone to donate money to an LGBT LGBT giving space. He has shown organization of their choice, simply his commitment to make sure that by using a credit card. this reflects the LGBT movement Here’s how it works: when using in the most positive, inclusive and meaningful way.” a credit card roughly three percent of purchases made Lepestos said on the card go the that some of his credit card compareasoning behind building the card nies. It is then split was because he between the actual feels the LGBT credit card company (Visa, MasterCard, community is “highetc.), the data proly underserved, cessor and the last especially in the EqualityCard percent typically financial world.” goes to the card’s Philanthropy reward program. Here is where the Ventures originally tried to reach EqualityCard is different. Instead out to LGBT nonprofits when of the last percent being a rewards working with the HaloCard, which program it gets donated into LGBT the EqualityCard gets its giving programs like Immigration Equality platform from. But the HaloCard or Athlete Ally. reaches out to all nonprofits gener“Not everyone can write that ally and didn’t seem to fit as well huge check at the big gala dinner with the LGBT movement. When every year. Students right out of Lepestos and Creager suggested an college who are LGBT or LGBT LGBT specific card to focus groups it became a different story. allies might not be able to do that, “I could see people’s eyes lightbut they all have credit cards. They ing up,” Lepestos said. can proudly display that card and they know that every time they go “I’m extremely excited about to lunch or buy text books or what EqualityCard’s potential to generever it is that they’re supporting ate new revenue streams for the the movement, that one percent LGBT Movement. The momentum of of that purchase is going back to LGBT rights has never been greater. an LGBT nonprofit that they care Now is the perfect time for this deeply about,” said Cindi Creager bold new fundraising initiative,” from CreagerCole Communications Creager said. ¢ in New York. Creager has known Visit Equality Card online at the EqualityCard’s creator and equalitycardproject.com for more Philanthropy Venture’s founder, information.

Nick Lepestos, since they were kids.

By Kailyn Lamb

SPEAKING O F C R E D I T. . .

Be sure to check out David Auten and John Schneider’s article Steps to Becoming Financially Fit on page 16 of the Out Front Living Guide 10

| FEBRUARY 5, 2014 | OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

OUT IN COLORADO

Born This Way Ball invites LGBT youth to dress to impress March 7 youth social brings a safer space to connect

By Kailyn Lamb IT CAN BE HARD FOR SOME LGBT STUDENTS TO REALLY ENJOY WHAT SUPPOSEDLY MAKES UP THE SOCIAL HIGHLIGHTS OF A MAINSTREAM HIGH SCHOOL — prom, homecoming, superlatives and more — all those things that tell kids they’re fitting in, but often come with gender-limiting dress codes and expectations for who makes an appropriate date that leave LGBT students feeling like a second class.

To a create a place where LGBT students can truly feel they belong, Highlands United Methodist Church in Denver is presenting their third annual Born This Way Ball, a non-religious and welcoming event for grades 7-12 that will have a DJ, a local drag queen named Daniella, door prizes and photography.

“I think every single person deserves a place where they can be exactly who they are and I think the world should be that place but since it’s

not always, it’s something we’ve always sought to continue to offer for folks to celebrate who they are,” said Reverend Bradley Laurvick, pastor at the church.

For people like Eddy Bowles, who is on the committee planning the event, it’s a chance for members of the adult LGBT community to give back to the youth. “We do have a certain amount of responsibility to show the youth that there is a community out there and yes it really does get better. I think with each generation we need to try and help educate the youth because it does seem like it’s so much more out there,” he said.

“I grew up in a very small, conservative, very religious town in Idaho and to think of a gay prom was completely unrealistic,” Bowles said.

“If we continue to provide these environments for them it instills a sense of confidence in them and confidence is what will make them go out into the world and be able to contribute to society in a

positive way, in a confident way, and the gay thing doesn’t matter at all.”

The Born This Way Ball will take place on March 7 with a theme of “share your magic.” The tickets are affordable at $9, with the opportunity for some youth to apply for a scholarship. After the event has sold 100 tickets sold they will stop selling tickets. Tickets can be purchased online by going to ofcnow.co/youthball.

Larry Hoyle has been part of the Born This Way Ball since it started and is a chair at the church.

According to Hoyle the ball has been getting bigger every year and the church is not afraid to display banners for it.

“It shows who we are and it shows our values,” he said.

“You don’t find very many people in the religious community who are so friendly and accommodating and trying to help and being such allies to the gay community, especially the gay youth,” Bowles said. ¢

OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

| FEBRUARY 5, 2014 | 11

NEWS

UNCHARTED TERRITORY

BY MIKE YOST

Rapid developments and plenty of surprises are making an increasingly-hopeful path to nationwide marriage equality through courts also increasingly tough to predict

UTAH USES NOVEL ‘DIVERSITY’ ARGUMENT TO SUPPORT SAME-SEX MARRIAGE BAN ON FEBRUARY 3, UTAH FILED ARGUMENTS WITH THE 10TH CIRCUIT COURT OF APPEALS defending the state’s same-sex marriage ban, citing that children should benefit from the gender diversity of both male and female parents.

Oral arguments are scheduled at the Denver-based 10th Circuit for April 10.

The brief was filed as part of an appeal to U.S. District Judge Robert Shelby’s ruling which struck down Utah’s constitutional amendment defining marriage between one man and one woman.

“Basically this is an argument that’s taken from cases involving affirmative action in higher education,” said Nancy Leong, Assistant Professor at the University of Denver’s Sturm College of Law. “What the state of Utah is trying to do here is to say that because diversity is something that we value in higher education, why wouldn’t we also value gender diversity within a parenting arrangement?”

Leong said that in her experience studying and teaching constitutional and civil rights law, it’s the first time she has ever seen this type of argument used to defend a same-sex marriage ban.

“I’m surprised to see the state of Utah trying it,” she said.

Leong said the most striking part of that claim is its speculative assumptions about masculinity and femininity.

“In other words, there are things that men provide that women can’t provide, and things women provide that men can’t provide,” Leong explained. “It’s an unexamined acceptance of gender stereotypes.”

The argument also draws false parallels between establishing a diverse student body at a university and a parenting arrangement, said Leong. “There’s this very obvious difference in terms of the magnitude of people to which you are applying the diversity argument to.”

Utah’s brief reasserts the idea that gender diversity — having one mother and one father— fosters 12

the optimal household for a child to learn and grow.

“Both the biological connection and the gender diversity inherent in the married, motherfather parenting model powerfully enhance child welfare,” the brief explains, “…the diversity of having both a mom and a dad is the ideal parenting environment.”

The American Academy of Pediatrics announced last year that it was in the best interest of children to allow same-sex couples who are raising a family to have access to the protections marriage provides.

In addition, the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, The American Psychiatric Association, The American Psychological Association, the Child Welfare League of America, and the National Adoption Center have all publically stated that sexual orientation has nothing to do with a person’s ability to raise a child.

Shannon Minter, Legal Director at the National Center for Lesbian Rights and co-counsel for the Utah plaintiffs who filed the original lawsuit, told Out Front he finds the terminology regarding gender diversity misleading.

“It’s an attempt to portray what is blatant gender discrimination as something positive,” said Minter, “but it’s basically just a defense for discriminating based on gender and only allowing opposite-sex couples and not same-sex couples to marry saying that’s a good thing because it promotes so-called diversity in marriage.”

Minter added that the argument only reinstates the very inequity that is being challenged regarding Utah’s same-sex marriage ban.

“We are to the point now where people who are defending these marriage bans are unable to identify any legitimate or principled reason to keep same-sex couples and their families out of marriage,” said Minter.

The plaintiffs represented by Minter must file a reply to Utah’s brief by Feb. 25. ¢

| FEBRUARY 5, 2014 | OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

x For up-to-the-minute coverage of marriage e q u a li ty n e ws , v i s i t o f c n ow.co /m a r r i a ge o r sea rc h # COm a r r i age

IS A SUPREME COURT RULING ON THE HORIZON? A SURGE OF LAWSUITS CHALLENGING BANS ON SAME-SEX MARRIAGE THROUGHOUT the nation could force the U.S. Supreme Court to rule on the issue sooner than later, but only if there are conflicting decisions in the lower courts, one expert said.

There are 33 states with bans on same-sex marriage, with lawsuits challenging the legality of those bans in most of them — including Colorado, Virginia, Michigan, Florida, Arizona, Pennsylvania, Ohio, Oklahoma and Utah.

Last December, U.S. District Judge Robert Shelby stuck down Utah’s same-sex marriage ban. The ruling was appealed by Utah, and the case heads to the 10th Circuit Court of Appeals in Denver.

It was the first time a federal court overturned a state marriage ban since the US Supreme Court, last June, struck down a part of the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) that banned federal benefits from samesex couples.

Whether the 10th Circuit decides to uphold Shelby’s ruling or not, the losing side will ask the US Supreme Court to review the case.

“I think this is the one the Supreme Court is going to take,” said Nancy Leong, Assistant Professor at the University of Denver’s Sturm College of Law. “The court kind of dodged the overall issue of the legality of same-sex marriage in situations where the state has the (same-sex marriage) ban.”

Last June, the Supreme Court decided not to review the Proposition 8 case, referring it instead back to the lower 9th Circuit Court’s decision to overturn the statute, allowing same-sex marriages in California.

Dismissing the appeal allowed the lower court ruling to stand and made same-sex marriage legal in California, though the Court had technically not taken a position on a constitutional right for lesbian and gay couples to marry.

“The court can only do that so many times,” said Leong, “particularly because there are two district courts (Utah and Oklahoma) within the 10th Circuit that have reached these decisions.”

17 states plus the District of Columbia allow same-sex marriage, with six of those states authorizing same-sex marriage through the courts — the latest in New Mexico in Dec. of 2013.

But one legal expert cautions that the trend of lower courts ruling in favor of same-sex marriage may actually keep the US Supreme Court from granting a review of the Shelby case.

“The 10th Circuit case presents a significant federal question,” said Ralph Ogden, a Colorado lawyer who is representing an Adams County couple suing to overturn Colorado’s same-sex marriage ban. “But frequently the Supreme Court will wait until there are conflicting opinions before it grants cert (review of the case).”

Ogden said the Shelby case will be the initial 10th Circuit opinion on the constitutionality of same-sex marriage bans. “It’s conceivable that they (the Supreme Court) will say we’re not going to grant a review. Let’s wait and see how the other circuit courts deal with the issue.”

“That’s not a prediction,” Ogden added. “It’s just one possibility, and that’s how they have reacted in the past.” ¢

OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

| FEBRUARY 5, 2014 | 13

PANEL

How is the LGBT community impacted by classism?

C George Gramer, Jr.

ertainly the LGBT community has people of all socioeconomic levels, but studies conclude that there is considerable poverty among LGBT individuals and couples. We also know that many in the community face homelessness, harassment, and discrimination.

While doing research for this submission, the phrase “myth of gay affluence” appeared frequently. Some would look at the advertisements in The Advocate or OUT or watch Ellen, Modern Family, or Will (or Jack) and incorrectly conclude that all LGBT are well-to-do white folks in ideal relationships wearing Armani and Gucci and driving BMWs or Mercedes.

We have millionaires and we have people on food stamps. For every LGBT college graduate, there is a high-school dropout.

For every LGBT homeowner there is another living day-to-day.

A

Pieter Tolsma

s Americans (and maybe humans in general) I don’t believe we can ever be an equal and class-free society.

It’s a beautiful idea, and one I believe we must work towards, but we have not achieved the kind of economic equality that is necessary to make that happen. It is not that there exists any sort of inherent superiority or inferiority, but rather that differences in experience make it easier to band together along certain lines and these groups becomes value-distorted so that one is prized over another.

How does the LGBT community fit into this? LGBT folks are just as capable of class struggle as our hetero counterparts.

There may have been a time when the struggle for acceptance and companionship leveled the field of experience and socio-economic disparity to the point that it was not perceived

Our community has many people with Palm Springs tastes and a pauper’s budget.

Classism is prejudice against or in favor of people belonging to a particular social class. While there may be envy in LGBT of any economic level, I do not sense a lot of internal prejudice. Where classism does exist, I believe it is from outside the community. The media, some on the religious right, and the Madison Avenue marketing folks are the ones practicing classism toward the LGBT community. The sooner our community is able to overcome the “myth of gay affluence” with others, the better.

Iowa native George Gramer, jr. is the president of the Colorado Log Cabin Republicans.

to matter; however as the LGBT identity comes to a place of acceptance, this changes. As the threat of isolation ebbs and the LGBT lifestyle becomes more mainstream, the pressures of classism group LGBT people along the same lines as our normalized counterparts. Prejudice once again focuses on the haves and have-nots.

Ironically, by proving and establishing the nonissue acceptability of the LGBT sex and gender presentations, we become subject to the most basic social undercurrent, class.

Pieter Tolsma is program coordinator of Denver PIQUE, a sexual health and social support program for gay/bi men in Denver.

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| FEBRUARY 5, 2014 | 15

COVER STORY

LGBT ECONOMICS The marketing firm Witeck Communications estimated the 2013 buying power of American LGBT adults was $830 billion, but additional studies revealed that poverty rates are higher for certain demographics within the LGBT community. They show that between extreme depictions of affluence and poverty, there’s a bigger, more complex picture of LGBT economics.

LGBT buying power and financial health

“B

BY MIKE YOST

uying power simply means one thing,” said Bob Witeck, President and Founder of Witeck Communications, a public relations and marketing firm that includes the lesbian and gay market as one of its specialties. “It means the amount of money that households or people have available to spend and to save after paying their taxes or their pension contributions.”

Also known as disposable personal income (DPI), the buying power of the adult LGBT community in the U.S. is growing, up from $790 billion in 2012 (compared to total U.S. consumer buying power was at $12.4 trillion that year).

“I hope what the data does is tell some of the economic truth about who we are,” said Witeck, emphasizing that LGBT people have long suffered from being made invisible — and that the $830 billion figure represents to him more than just the ability to spend.

“We are part of every neighborhood,” Witeck said. “We buy homes.

We have jobs. We pay taxes. We get promotions. We open businesses.

CONTINUED ON PAGE 18 t

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| FEBRUARY 19, 2014 | 17

ECONOMICS CONTINUED FROM PAGE 16 t We do all the same things everyone else does.

We want that to be realized, that we’ve actually contributed a lot. We want success in life as much as anybody else, and by doing that we want to show you value in who we are.”

Witeck calculated DPI using hundreds of population samples implemented by marketing research partner Harris Interactive, which showed 6 to 7 percent of Americans age 18 and up identify-

said Dr. Gary Gates, author of the study and distinguished scholar at the Williams Institute on Sexual Orientation and Gender Identity Law and Public Policy. “You still see lesbians earning less than gay men.”

One of the possible reasons lesbian couples make more than women in opposite-sex relationships is that lesbians are less likely to have children, which means they are less likely to have had disruption in workforce participation, Gates said.

But that income gap is shrinking, as the wage difference between lesbian same-sex couples and women of oppositesex couples has narrowed by $2,000 since 2008.

And although gay couples in the labor force make more than women, their median personal income is slightly lower than male members of opposite-sex couples.

This is despite the fact that same-sex couples have higher levels of labor force participation and higher levels of education, with 46 percent of same-sex couples in 2011 reporting having a college degree, compared to 32 percent of oppositesex couples.

Discrimination in the workplace is one of the more obvious factors for lower wages, Gates said.

The Williams Institute reported that 21 percent of LGBT people in the work force experience unfair treatment in hiring, pay, or promotions.

Gates also cautioned that the results of the survey do not provide an accurate representation of the LGBT community as a whole.

“I don’t know if the same-sex couple sample gives you a very good picture of what we might see if we had the entire LGBT community,” Gates said, “particularly around this issue of economic advantage or disadvantage.”

Gates added that patterns regarding income gaps within the LGBT community mirror that of the overall population. “For instance, people in same-sex couples, racial minorities, have similar kinds of economic disadvantage as they would in the general population.”

“We buy homes. We have jobs. We pay taxes. We get promotions. We open businesses. We do all the same things everyone else does. We want that to be realized, that we’ve actually contributed a lot. We want success in life as much as anybody else, and by doing that we want to show you value in who we are.” ing themselves as LGBT — which translates to about 15 to 16 million people.

“There are some estimates that put it around 5 percent, there are other estimates that put it higher,” said Witeck, adding that estimations are usually undercounted since many LGBT individuals are reluctant to identify their sexual orientation or gender identity in a survey.

“We’ve been doing samples with Harris interactive for almost 14 years and no matter how we sample American adults, if we ask sexual orientation, it normally comes between 6.5 and 7 percent almost every time.”

In addition to robust buying power, the overall financial health of the LGBT community is strong, according to Prudential Finances, Inc. which released a study in 2012 asking 1,401 LGBT Americans about their economic well-being.

The report cited statistics indicating LGBT individuals have a higher median income than the general population: at $61,500 compared to $50,000, attributing higher education levels and living in LGBT friendly cities with elevated median incomes as contributing factors.

But the Prudential study stressed that the LGBT population includes a wide spectrum of demographics and incomes. For example, although gay male couples had the highest median household income at $103,100, they only represented 19 percent of the whole LGBT community.

Comparing same-sex couples to heterosexual couples in income

T

he Williams Institute, a national think tank in Los Angeles at the University of California, released “Same-sex and Different-sex Couples in the American Community Survey: 2005-2011,” outlining the economic condition of male and female same-sex couples compared to opposite-sex couples.

Although the study found that lesbian couples reported a median personal income of $38,000 in 2011 — $8,000 higher than women of opposite-sex couples — women still earn less than men regardless of sexual orientation.

“None of it overcomes the basic gender gap,” 18

| FEBRUARY 19, 2014 | OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

same-sex couples have poverty rates at least twice that of opposite-sex married African Americans.

In addition, African American male samesex couples are more than six times as likely to be poor than white male same-sex couples.

African American lesbian couples are three times more likely to be poor than white lesbian couples.

“We see the same kinds of patterns for Hispanics,” said M.V. Lee Badgett, co-author of the study, distinguished scholar at the William’s Institute, and Director of the Center for Public Policy & Administration at the University of Massachusetts Amherst. “They are more likely to be poor than non-Hispanic or white people in same-sex couples.”

Badgett added that the only difference is that Hispanic opposite-sex couples are actually more likely to be poor than same-sex Hispanic couples.

The report also showed that same-sex families are especially vulnerable to poverty, with children living in same-sex households almost twice as likely to be poor as children of married oppositesex couples.

Strikingly, 52.3 percent of African American children in a same-sex male household live in poverty, the highest rate for any children in any household type.

Badgett said discrimination and lack of proper policy protections are contributing factors to the higher poverty levels since LGBT individuals who are treated poorly are less likely pursue benefits they may be entitled to — assuming they even qualify for those benefits in the first place.

Badgett said legislative policies cannot entirely eliminate wage gaps and working to explicate all of the factors contributing to these income disparities is a challenge. “It’s still a bit of a mystery. Very few people have studied this. I’m very interested in it and plan to do more in-depth studies in the future.”

The Human Rights Campaign reported in the 2014 Corporate Equality Index that for the first time ever, more than 60 percent of fortune 500 companies have implemented sexual orientation and gender identity protections.

The LGB community and poverty

I

n June 2013, the Williams Institute released a report, New Patterns of Poverty in the Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual Community, which revealed that members of the LGB community are more vulnerable to poverty — particularly women, people of color, and children of same-sex households.

Though the study reported that poverty rates since 2008 have increased for both the LGB and heterosexual communities, African American

Later this year, Badgett will work with the Williams Institute to create simulations that will test additional factors which contribute in broadening economic disadvantages.

“We’ve decided to ask, what would happen if the minimum wage went up? What would happen if we got rid of the gender wage gap? What would happen if gay men’s wages were equalized to straight men’s wages?”

Badgett stated that the biggest challenge in organizing the survey was finding all the necessary data to paint a comprehensive picture of the economic LGB landscape. The transgender community, for example, lacked the essential census information regarding gender identity to be included in the report.

CONTINUED ON PAGE 20 t

OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

| FEBRUARY 19, 2014 | 19

ECONOMICS CONTINUED FROM PAGE 18 t Poverty in the transgender community

B

ut a 2011 survey from the National Center for Transgender Equality and the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force revealed that the transgender community is one of the most vulnerable demographics to discrimination, harassment, and poverty.

The survey showed that, compared to the general population, a transgender household is four times more likely to have an income of less than $10,000 a year. The rate of unemployment was twice that of the general population, with rates for transgender people of color four times the national unemployment rate.

“Everybody is struggling,” said Dr. Karen M. Scarpella, Executive Director and Program Director at the Gender Identity Center of Colorado (GIC), “but the additional challenge is that there’s so much discrimination, the transgender person really in this economy doesn’t stand a chance.”

Scarpella said that there are several unique challenges facing the transgender community, especially when it comes to special healthcare needs regarding medicines, hormones or counseling. Though the Affordable Care Act now provides protections so that transgender individuals cannot be denied insurance, the obstacles that reinforce poverty endure.

For example, something as simple as accessing a food bank can be problematic. “Transgender people are afraid to go to a food pantry,” Scarpella said. “Or if a religious organization is running food pantry services, the transgender person is probably not welcome or wouldn’t know if they’re welcome or not and won’t go.”

The GIC offers food assistance at their headquarters for those who cannot access food banks.

But to defeat these steep income disparities, Scarpella said that a transformation in the oftenskewed perception of the transgender population is needed. “I think the backdoor key to fixing this is education. If society at large understands what transgender is, the discrimination goes away, and the additional barriers go away as well.”

who they are attracted to is their private business,” Scarpella said. “For transgender people, their stigmatized identity is very public, and people are uncomfortable with something they don’t understand.”

And those misconceptions are not limited to communities outside of the LGBT population. “There’s transphobia in the gay and lesbian community, and there’s homophobia in the trans community,” Scarpella said. “It’s interesting because I really believe it’s based on fear and internalized issues based on society’s marginalization.”

Brand loyalty to pro-LGBT corporations

W

hile studies are providing a more nuanced understanding of the entire LGBT economic experience, many corporations have taken notice of the LGBT buying power. In doing that, they have moved ahead of inadequate public policies and established their own workplace protections for LGBT employees.

“Only in the last five years have they (corporations) become much more engaged in public policy,” said Witeck. “There were only 3 companies that signed the amicus brief in California’s Prop 8 case.”

By the time Proposition 8 and the Defense of Marriage Act reached the US Supreme Court last year, more than 200 companies had filed briefs calling for same-sex marriage equality, including Google, Facebook, Amazon, CBS Corporation, Starbucks and the Walt Disney Company.

The Human Rights Campaign reported in the 2014 Corporate Equality Index that for the first time ever, more than 60 percent of fortune 500 companies have implemented sexual orientation and gender identity protections.

“Marketers who are truly invested and engaged in the LGBT market are looking not at today’s customers necessarily,” Witeck said.

“They’re looking on how to make tomorrows customers.”

Polls have consistently shown that an overwhelming majority of Americans under the age of thirty support same-sex marriage.

Witeck commented that if businesses want to engage that particular demographic, companies must reflect analogous perspectives on important social issues.

“Brands should look as forward thinking as they [younger Americans] do,” explained Witeck. “Ten years ago, a marketer would have divided the world into risk and reward. If we’re going to do this, connect with gay people, what are we risking? Today it’s not what are we risking, it’s just what rewards are we losing.”

And studies show the LGBT population and its allies are loyal to pro-LGBT companies, with 88 percent of gay and lesbian adults and 70 percent of heterosexual adults more likely to consider a brand that provides LGBT workplace benefits, according to a Harris Interactive study.

The survey showed that, compared to the general population, a transgender household is four times more likely to have an income of less than $10,000 a year. The rate of unemployment was twice that of the general population, with rates for transgender people of color four times the national unemployment rate.

Part of GIC’s work in Colorado includes educating companies to be more culturally competent, but Scarpella said fostering a shift in how the public views the transgender community will take time.

Scarpella added that it wasn’t that long ago the LGB community faced similar amounts of harassment and discrimination, but the transgender community got overlooked.

“People are becoming more and more comfortable with gays and lesbians, and part of it is that 20

| FEBRUARY 19, 2014 | OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

Dismantling stereotypes

W

ith the combination of brand loyalty and $830 billion in disposable personal income, marketers are taking notice of the LGBT community Witeck cautioned that buying power is not synonymous with wealth. “There’s a lot of mythology about gay affluence or gay incomes,” he said. “Along the way, gay people pretty much look a lot like other people.”

M.V. Lee Badgett of the Williams Institute hopes that current and future studies, which analyze how that $830 billion in buying power is disseminated within the LGBT community, will help dismantle the common misconception that being gay means being wealthy.

“There is this stereotype of gay people as this very affluent group,” Badgett said. “One way that it’s harmful is that it makes it look like same-sex couples maybe don’t really need marriage. They can go hire a lawyer to try to make-up for the fact that they can’t get married, when in fact no lawyer can create something that’s equivalent to marriage.”

Badgett said the stereotype of gay affluence can also cultivate roadblocks in establishing equality safeguards, the lack of which can contribute to financial uncertainty.

Though Colorado has workplace discrimination protections for LGBT employees, there are 29 states where workers can be fired on the basis of sexual orientation, and an employee can be fired based on gender identity in 33 states.

The Employment Non-Discrimination Act (ENDA) would provide workplace protections for the LGBT population nationwide, but House Speaker John Boehner recently told the LGBT Equality Caucus that there was “no way” ENDA would pass this year.

“People look at LGBT people and think, well, if they’re doing so well, how can they be victims of discrimination?” Badgett said. “Stereotypes can sometimes blind people to the fact that inequality has economic harm.”

And though protections such as ENDA would directly impact LGBT employees and their ability to establish financial independence, Badgett hopes her work will also broaden the political framework of what is defined as an LGBT issue.

“Congress is about to cut food stamps,” Badgett said, citing the report she co-authored which found 14.1 percent of lesbian couples and 7.7 percent of male couples receive food stamps, compared to 6.5 percent of opposite-sex couples.

“Now we know the issue of food stamps is an LGBT issue.”

On Feb. 4, the U.S. Senate voted 68-32 to pass the 2014 Farm Bill, which included a cut of $8.7 billion from the food stamp program — now referred to as the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program. The bill heads to President Obama where he is expected to sign the legislation into law.

“Think about some of our policy debates with an LGBT lens,” Badgett said. “Think about what it means to be a community and what the community’s responsibilities are for all of its members, not just the ones doing well economically.” ¢ What do you think?

Voice your opinion @ outfrontonline.com

LEGAL

Know your rights in Colorado Although more legal rights and protections are needed to give LGBT Coloradoans true equality, being aware of laws that exist right now can help you protect yourself and your family, and help you know what to bring to an attorney to find out what options or recourse you have.

CIVIL UNIONS • The most well-known benefit Colorado provides lesbian and gay couples is the ability to join in a civil union, passed into law in 2013. Unmarried individuals who are of age can form a civil union with a same-sex partner to gain access to the same state-level rights and benefits enjoyed by a married couple.

WORKPLACE DISCRIMINATION PROTECTIONS • C o l o r a d o ’ s Employment Nondiscrimination Act of 2007 bans employers from firing you, refusing to hire you, or making

employment-related decisions based on your lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender identity.

ABILITY TO ADOPT • Single LGBT people can adopt children in Colorado, and since 2007 Colorado makes it possible for a second parent in a same-sex relationship to legally adopt a partner’s child as co-parents.

PUBLIC ACCOMODATIONS & HOUSING PROTECTIONS • Colorado law prohibits open-to-the-public establishments such as stores or restaurants from discrimination based on sexual orientation or gender expression, whether it is your real identity or what they perceive you to be. The protections also apply in hotels, medical establishments, museums, public libraries and more, and also to housing. ¢

The opinions expressed in this article are general in nature. For specific legal advice about your particular situation, please contact an attorney.

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| FEBRUARY 19, 2014 | 21

NO STRINGS ATTACHED PHOTO: FLOR BLAKE

THE LESBIAN SOCIALITE Robyn Vie-Carpenter

Gifts shouldn’t come with expectations

W

henever the same conversation keeps coming up with different people in my life, my “spidey-sense” starts tingling — and I figure lots of other people are talking about it too. I thought I’d bring this latest issue to you.

When you offer to help someone in any way and don’t state upfront that you are expecting something in return, then this offer is a gift. Is it fair for the giver to hold a gift against someone down the road — when the recipient doesn’t offer what the giver thinks she or he should offer in exchange? People have differing opinions on this subject based on what side of this equation they fall on, the giver or the recipient.

This is how my abundance coach, Paula Langguth Ryan, helped me understand it; when you offer help, there are no strings, unless stated upfront. It’s perfectly acceptable to make a deal with someone: I’ll help you with this, if you do this — giving the recipient the opportunity to accept or decline your offer based on whether they can accept your terms. This is also not a gift, but an arrangement. But if you make an offer, without any stated requirement for repayment/restitution, they don’t owe you anything. Yes, a thank you would be nice, but even that isn’t a requirement — just polite. In reality, you aren’t owed anything for a gift.

So ask yourself why you’re offering a gift. Are you wondering what’s in it for you? Are you giving because you want people to admire you for the giving? If so, chances are you’ll be disappointed. You won’t get the credit you believe you deserve, because no one will ever admire you as much as you do.

Here’s my take. When I offer a gift to someone, I am doing it because they need it. I can see their need and my ability to help. Yes, I appreciate a thank you. However, it isn’t actually necessary. I receive exactly what I need in the giving. I don’t need credit. It’s not actually about me. I am my karma in action.

I relish the opportunity to pay back to the Universe all the blessings that I have received in the past, by being a blessing to someone else’s life, period.

You don’t owe me anything. I have, admittedly, not always been this altruistic.

One of the things I really admire about my wusband is her willingness to help anyone in need. She sees it as her responsibility to be a blessing to other people when she can. She walks her talk and lives her faith. She very rarely gets credit for all that she does for people and she never does it to receive anything in return.

A gift is defined as “a thing given willingly to someone without payment.”

The synonyms for gift are — present, donation, offering, endowment, gratuity.

I think you get my point. This definition could help with miscommunications around gifts.

This is most definitely not everyone’s understanding. People have lamented to me about how someone they thought was being kind suddenly told them that they needed to be repaid for their kindness. Others have lamented to me that the kindness shown to someone wasn’t given the proper amount of gratitude or reciprocated by the recipient. Maybe this miscommunication could be helped by understanding the meaning of a gift.

I’ve come to realize this is all relative and equality is total BS anyway. If I give you $5 when you really need it and you give me $5 when I really need it, this is still probably not truly equal. We may have differing levels of our understanding of our needs. Maybe you gave me $5 when I really needed $10.

My advice is to give just for the giving. Open your heart, know that you will receive what you need, give what you can when you are able and it will all balance out in the end. ¢ Robyn Vie-Carpenter is a social columnist on the local and national LGBT community. See more of Robyn’s columns online at ofcnow.co/TLS or find her on Twitter @TheLesSocialite.

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GOING ON MEDS

FOR HIV BLEED LIKE ME Scott McGlothlen

I

When one of the hardest moments of my HIVpositive life became a turning point

n my first meeting with my HIV doctor just after I was diagnosed, I asked to go on medications immediately. He said it wasn’t the right time and I should wait — this was when the HIV treatment protocol still advised postponing medications until it’s completely necessary.

Since, historically, HIV-suppressing medications used to be highly toxic, experts saw it as more important to postpone the side-effects.

My doctor also pointed out that I, like almost all people with an HIV diagnosis, was an emotional basket case, and that could interfere with my adherence to the medication.

Sure enough, in the following months I often slipped in and out of denial about the whole thing, thinking the doctors would soon realize they got my blood work all wrong. I still needed to get acquainted with and accepting of my new disease.

Each positive comrade I met seemed to have waited a different length of time before starting treatment. Some began within a few months of testing positive, while others didn’t need it for years.

Considering my lifestyle of fitness, healthy eating and avoiding drugs, cigarettes and alcohol, I imagined my infection would progress at a slower rate too.

Yet over the following months, tests showed my immune system steadily weakening as the viral load increased. I happened to be on an HIV Retreat at Shadowcliff when I got the email from my doctor: T-cell count had fallen below 350, the magic number to start meds. I’d known this was coming, but still I put my head down and began sobbing into my hands. I didn’t understand how some poz persons could live recklessly for years without meds and yet I had to start in a little less than a year. My body was officially losing the battle, and it made my HIV status more real than ever. Luckily, the retreat offered the right support at the right time.

I forced my partner, Luke, to come with me to the doctor’s appointment

to decide which medication regimen I would choose. The doctor laid out three of the most popular options, plus the possibility of a medications study. He spent more than an hour answering questions.

My family didn’t want to be left out either, so afterward I called them for their thoughts. They were surprised when I said that I wanted to try the study — I assured them that the study wouldn’t be blind (meaning there was no chance I’d be taking a placebo) and that it was just to test how some new drugs worked in combination with each other. Plus, I’d get paid.

The first pill felt gigantic as I swallowed it down. I shuttered at the thought that this would be part of my daily routine for the rest of my life. I felt an odd sense of shame that if I wouldn’t let this disease kill me, these medications would serve as my punishment for getting infected. Once again the stigma of HIV had my mind racing, and I got choked up.

For the medication study, I was required to have repeated blood draws.

The study coordinator happily said they’d already seen some amazing results — by week one my viral load had decreased significantly and my T-cells were coming back. By week two my viral load was undetectable.

It was phenomenal: results like that typically take around six months on meds. And as icing on the cake, I had no side-effects. I wanted to cry again, this time for joy.

The regimen was so effective that the doctor recommended sticking to it even after the study’s end, and nearly six years later I’m still on it. Now, swallowing those pills no longer churns up the stigma of HIV, but a reminder that I’m dedicated to doing what’s necessary to stay alive. ¢ Scott McGlothlen is a cultural columnist on life as a HIV-positive gay man. See more of Scott’s columns online at ofcnow.co/scott or contact him at scott@outfrontonline.com.

OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

| FEBRUARY 19, 2014 | 23

COMING EVENTS THROUGH

F EB RUA RY

FEB 23

21 & 23 Boulder Bach Festival:

FROM THE DEPTHS I CALL TO YOU FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 21 • 7:30 P.M. @ ST. JOHN’S EPISCOPAL CATHEDRAL 1350 WASHINGTON STREET, DENVER & SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 23 • 4 P.M. MOUNTAIN VIEW METHODIST CHURCH 355 PONCA PLACE, BOULDER Broaden your musical horizons with one swift stop at the Boulder Bach Festival: Concerto, Cantatas and Monet. Featuring artists from all over the world, this concert is a surefire way to drink in the culture of classical art.

More info online at ofcnow.co/bbf

FE B

Colorado Gold Rush Conference

21–23

The Legend of Georgia McBride @ RICKETSON THEATRE 1101 13TH ST. A mediocre Elvis impersonator becomes Florida’s greatest drag queen in this award winning new play. Catch the world premiere tour in downtown Denver before it’s too late!

More info online ofcnow.co/P4f

FEB

24 Mon

@ RENAISSANCE DENVER HOTEL • 3801 QUEBEC ST. The Colorado Gold Rush Conference is dedicated to the education and support of the trans* community, their families, friends, and allies. The committee is broadening the spectrum of workshop topics to include: gender queer, Significant Others, Families, Friends, and Allies (SOFFA), trans* activism, and professional training.

More info online at coloradogoldrush.org

Mousetrap

@ ARVADA CENTER 6901 WADSWORTH BLVD, ARVADA The longest running play in recorded history has come to the Arvada Center.

This classic Agatha Christie mystery unfolds when a group of strangers find themselves stranded in a boarding house during a snowstorm. Murder is committed and everyone is suspect as a policeman investigates the crime and uncovers their hidden secrets.

More info online at ofcnow.co/sKG 24

| FEBRUARY 19, 2014 | OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

THROUGH

FEB 23

Tao: Phoenix Rising @ MACKY AUDITORIUM UNIVERSITY OF COLORADO BOULDER CAMPUS • 7:30 P.M. Members of the Japanese taiko drumming corps, these performers are at the elite of athleticism, combining elements of Cirque du Soleil, high intensity drumming, and high energy dancing. Tickets $14.

More info online at drum-tao.com

MAR

MAR

2

7

FEB 24 –

National Eating Disorders Awareness Week

Fri

Sun

Born This Way Ball

MAR 2

NED Awareness Week is a collective effort of primary volunteers, including eating disorder professionals, health care providers, students, educators, social workers, and individuals committed to raising awareness of the dangers surrounding eating disorders and the need for early intervention and treatment.

See page 11 for details about this special event

More info online at ofcnow.co/neda

MAR

1

Sat

@ HAMBURGER MARY’S 700 E 17TH AVE. • 5 P.M.

Benefitting Off-Center, this event promises to be more fabulous than a glitter-covered unicorn wearing a rainbow boa singing Streisand.

General admission $35, which includes two drink tickets. Table packages also available.

a M l nua

n A 4 th

The Gayest Oscar Party Ever

s a r G rdi NIGHT

D • 7 P.M. – MID

ADO BLV 000 S. COLOR 2 • S R E T S U B @ DAVE &

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More info online at ofcnow.co/R52

LGBT Lobby Day @ CENTRAL PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH 1660 SHERMAN STREET, DENVER 8 A.M. – 3 P.M.

MAR

3

Mon

LGBT Lobby Day is an important chance to make your voice heard by telling your legislators what matters to you. When it comes to advancing equality, nothing is as powerful as an in-person visit to the elected officials who represent you. That’s why each year, our community and our allies gather at the Capitol for this event.

FIND MORE Find more upcoming

events or add your own online at ofcnow.co/cal

More info online at ofcnow.co/lobby2014

OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

| FEBRUARY 19, 2014 | 25

CUISINE

Sugarmill's Noahsphere dessert

COOHILLS 1400 Wewatta Street Denver • (303)-623-5700 Coohills.com

AT CHEF NOAH FRENCH'S SUGARMILL, SWEETS UP!

By Jeff Steen

HAMBURGER MARY’S 700 East 17th Avenue Denver • 303-832-1333 HamburgerMarys.com/denver

PARALLEL SEVENTEEN 1600 East 17th Ave. Denver • 303-399-0988 ParallelSeventeen.com

DJ’s 9th Avenue Cafe DJ’S 9TH AVENUE CAFE 865 Lincoln St. Denver • 303-386-3375 DjsCafe.biz

BEFORE ALL ELSE, NOAH FRENCH IS A MAN OF SMILES. Of course, he has much to smile about: the rapt attention of Denver’s sweet-tooths and a playground of treats to placate them. The formidable figure behind the marble counter at Sugarmill, a fresh, indulgent new concept off 25th and Larimer, carries with him a retinue of stories — from helming the pastry program at Hawaii’s famed Roy’s restaurant, to plating thousands of desserts for high-profile Disney dinners. It was at Roy’s that he met Denver’s favorite culinary son, Troy Guard, and why he spent this past Friday night wowing us with confectionary magic.

First, a little backstory. The venerable Guard has many concepts to his name, not the least of which is Larimer Square’s TAG Continental Social Food. It was here that Troy and French joined forces, Troy building off success at Zengo and nine75, and French marking our sweets scene with simplicity and elegance.

Sugarmill, a dessert-driven cafe with an impressive selection of savory dishes to boot, is French’s day in the sun. The concept is really his — backed

by Guard, of course — and sings with unique, personable creativity. While I can say I have spent little time at dessert bars in Denver (nods to DBar on 17th), I also haven’t spent much conversational time with a chef during a meal. There’s something magnetic about Chef French — his regular grins, idle banter, and ever-so-meticulous plating. It’s hard to take your eyes off the man — or his desserts — long enough to remember that you have a decadent dish in front of you.

But before dessert must come dinner (that’s what Mom always said). So dinner it was: a helping of Guard’s creations, executed with aplomb by Chef Jeff Hickman. And the selections were spot-on satisfying: simple, unembellished creations that spoke of whimsy instead of a kitchen trying too hard.

There’s not a one that disappoints, but if you’re aiming for something small before a sweet entrée, consider two of my favorites: Roasted Sunchokes — meaty and rich — and the Short Rib Tortellini to share. There is no tortellini dish outside of Italy I have tried and found to have greater finesse, character, and tenderness. My only wish was that it carried more of a peppery or citrusy bite to cut the heaviness of rib and butternut squash purée.

QUEER COCKTAILS: THE BUTCH SLAP

By Ashley Trego

This bad ass bitch of a cocktail will grab your tipples, slap you silly and not even think about apologizing for it. She likes her whiskey like she likes her women, slightly aged, a little sweet and smooth and silky going down. Although whiskey is kind of her thing, there are occasions when deviation is called for and it might go something like this…

The Butch Slap can be enjoyed however you want it, shaken, with rocks, shirt on, shirt off, getting your rocks off…totally up to you.

THE MELTING POT 2707 W. Main St. Littleton • (303)-794-5666 MeltingPot.com

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| FEBRUARY 5, 2014 | OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

One pour of Jamesons Irish Whiskey One pour of G-Spirits whiskey ( a tasty beverage every drop of which has been poured over a super models boobs) And a splash of Grand Marnier for good measure

While French fixated on caramel dots and spheres of chocolate, my eyes wandered the dining room. It’s a small space, I’ll grant you, but there’s not much need for more. Orb lights dangle from the ceiling, setting a glow on desserts laid across the counter, while on the expansive back wall, a mural of — you guessed it — a sugar mill pulls eyes in for examination. The tables, meanwhile, are mostly quaint two-tops with room for larger parties if the evening demands it. Next door, you can hear the faint murmur of crowds dishing and dining at Sugarmill’s savory counterpart, Los Chingones.

Then, dessert. A march of Apple Almond Tart, Red Velvet Crème Brûlée, Bunch of Bananas, and the celebrity Noahsphere. Each bore a resemblance to simple desserts known and loved by sweet-obsessed kids. The Almond Tart, for example, propelled the sugary lust forward with crème fraîche ice cream and a brown sugar honey sauce. The crust snapped with each bite in contrast to the seductively smooth ice cream. How do you follow that?

With red velvet cake, of course — capped, decadently, with a silky smooth cream cheese crème brûlée. It was accented, merrily, by a smattering of five spice streusel and a quenelle of doughy red velvet ice cream.

With such a procession, there must be a pause. So the idle banter continued between sips of Petite Syrah, laughter ensuing over the crazy things that chefs do these days. “Cupcakes?” Chef asked, his smile turned to a question mark. “What’s the big deal about cupcakes?” We laughed, unable to figure out exactly why the icing-atop-batter phenomenon had launched to such popularity.

So I asked, curious with all this delicious creativity, if there was anything French wouldn’t touch. “You know,” he said, eyes lifting from the raspberries on a Jasmine Chocolate Bar, “I can’t do Key lime pie. There’s nothing wrong with it, really. People have good recipes for it. But to me — to me, it just tastes like aspirin.”

Not being a Key lime fan myself, I nodded approval and took a deep breath as the next dish found its way in front of us: Bunch of Bananas. As you can imagine, it was everything banana in very clever rendering: banana cheesecake atop banana walnut cake, plated alongside a float in miniature, fizzing with cream soda and banana ice cream.

Effervescence meets comfort food in this creation, and it struck me that French’s variations of classic banana treats were touching on many fond childhood memories. Memories of banana-walnut quick bread fresh out of the oven on a Sunday afternoon. Memories of secret root beer float missions with my brothers when I was only 8. Memories of banana cream pie birthdays, conical hats docked on my very little head.

But the show-stopping finish for French has to be the aptly named Noahsphere. He says the name came from a blogger once upon a time, but it’s known by other appellations — like my favorite, the “Chocolate Death Star.” While I was well-plied with food at this point, it’s hard to neglect such an offering. Picture it: an orb of smooth dark chocolate, hollowed and filled with candied walnuts, flourless chocolate cake, and marshmallows, finished with impossible flourish by a smoldering pour of hot caramel, melting a hole in the top. It is rich; it is airy; it is earthy; it is delightful. But after a procession of sweets, I dare say this is one that needs a meal all to itself.

As we enjoyed our final licks and bites, I asked if French would ever dive into a pastry trend — something exploding in the world of desserts these days. He shook his head.

“I’ve been out there and tasted most of what’s going on,” he says. “I’m not impressed. Trends are just that — they come and go. I want to do what I do, and be inspired to create my own desserts.” Put another way, you won’t see him jumping on the cupcake truck any time soon. ¢ Sugarmill is located at 2461 Larimer Street #101 in Denver. Visit online at sugarmilldesserts.com. Food For Thought is a culinary column by Jeff Steen, Out Front’s food writer. See more food articles at ofcnow.co/food.

Dont forget Tuesday is $15.00 Liters of House Margarita Gold!

FUN AFFORDABLE DELICIOUS

Not all green chili is created equal. Come in and get your Benny’s fix.

301 EAST 7TH AVE. • 303 894 0788 BENNYSRESTAURANT.COM OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

| FEBRUARY 5, 2014 | 27

ARTS & CULTURE

THE LEGEND OF GEORGIA MCBRIDE

Jan. 10 - Feb 23 Champa & 13th • Denver DenverCenter.org

All in plain sight MORAL DILEMMA AND EROTIC THRILL ADORN FRENCH GAY DRAMA ‘STRANGER BY THE LAKE’

By Gary M. Kramer

SISTERS OF SWING Mar. 7 - May 11 5501 Arapahoe Ave. • Boulder BouldersDinnerTheatre.com

HILARY KOLE PAYS TRIBUTE TO JUDY GARLAND Feb. 22 • Boettcher Concert Hall 1000 14th St. • Denver ColoradoSymphony.org

SWING! Feb. 21 - Mar. 23 2450 W Main St. • Littleton TownHallArtsCenter.com

LEPRECHAUN Mar. 15 2510 East Colfax www.denverfilm.org

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STRANGER BY THE LAKE, A FRENCH GAY DRAMA WRITTEN AND DIRECTED BY ALAIN GUIRAUDIE, depicts a love triangle that develops at a cruising area and turns into a murder investigation.

In the film, Franck (Pierre Deadonchamps) befriends newcomer Henri (Patrick d’Assumçao), but he lusts after Michel (Christophe Paou). Even though Franck spies Michel drowning his boyfriend, Ramière (François-Renaud Labarthe), he can’t resist coupling up with the murdering hunk.

However, once their affair begins, Franck is frustrated that his relationship with Michel is limited to their lakeside assignations. Curiously, both men lie to Inspector Damroder (Jérômre Chappatte), who is investigating Ramière’s death.

This seductive erotic thriller — which is shot in a series of hypnotic, repetitive sequences — plays with issues of attraction and voyeurism, as well as trust and truth as the characters strip down on the beach, swim naked in the lake and stroke and sometimes suck each other off in the woods.

Director Alain Guiraudie's film is incredibly atmospheric and uninhibited. Viewers will be breathing heavy during the erotic trysts and as the tension increases in the final reel as a series of violent murders occur.

Guiraudie spoke (with the assistance of a translator) about creating his seductive, erotic thriller.

Gary M. Kramer: Your entire film is shot on a nude beach, in the water, and in the woods. The all-male cast appears more frequently than not sans clothes. Can you discuss what you spent on costumes and locations?

Alain Guiraudie: (Laughs, answers in English).

The beach was free. The costumes were 1,500 Euros. Expensive!

GMK: Your film is very much about voyeurism and the male gaze — there’s a scene in which Franck spies a murder, and men in the woods are looking at other guys having sex.

AG: The theme of voyeurism wasn’t predominant for me. I think what I was more interested in was about how to look, and how things look. One of the questions I was interested in was, ‘How do you show naked men on the beach? How do you film them when you are opposite them?’ When you are looking directly at them, if they have their legs

spread out, their sexual organs are going to appear in the image. I thought I could move the camera slightly off to the side, but in the end, we decided it was better to do it in this very frontal way.

GMK: Why was that?

AG: Because that's how it is! I've gone to these kinds of nude beaches and that’s what you see.

This is really a film where nothing is hidden. There were some things need to be hidden, but nothing about the body needs to be hidden.

GMK: You show Michel drowning his boyfriend in the water through the trees. Why did you make this murder unambiguous?

AG: I wanted the viewer to know exactly the same information that Franck knew. I didn’t want it to be a psychological film…so it was really obvious for me to let the audience know. The main thrust of the plot is here is Franck being caught between his desires and the ethical and moral questions — should I turn this guy into the police because he just killed someone?

GMK: Can you talk about the love triangle between Henri, Franck, and Michel?

AG: I think what is very interesting is that it posits two very different approaches to love and desire. On one hand, you have the relationship between Franck and Michel, very sexual, and the desire is all consuming and that is the primary aspect of that relationship. But then you have the relationship between Franck and Henri…a relationship that’s more disturbing, less clear what it is about. It’s certainly friendship, but you can also say that it’s a love relationship between Franck and Henri, too. The way they all interact with each other — the circular motion — really became evident during the editing process.

GMK: How did you work with your actors?

AG: I think a large part of the work was actually done during casting. What was important was to find two actors that would work together well as a couple. When they actually did come together, a lot of that work had been done in advance by casting them.

See the official trailer or find local show times for Stranger By The Lake at ofcnow.co/stranger

OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

| FEBRUARY 5, 2014 | 29

WEEKLY SPECIALS FROM OUT FRONT’S LGBT-INCLUSIVE BAR PARTNERS.

BLACK CROWN

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4 p.m. – 6 p.m.

2-for-1 beers, $3 rum, and vodka specials, $2 drafts

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1/2 price select bottles of wine

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$2 rum and vodka specials, $2 drafts, $5 Jose Cuervo, $15 beer buckets and $5 Jager shots

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$3 wells, vino, domestics, lattes; $1.50 PBR’s; $4 shots of Fireball 3 p.m. to 7 p.m.

11 a.m. to 2 a.m., Thursday through Saturday.

FRIDAYS

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VISIT WEBSITE FOR SPECIALS

Karaoke at 9 p.m.

LI’L DEVILS

SUNDAYS Molly’s famous $4 Bloodys

LilDevilsLounge.com WEDNESDAYS

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SUNDAYS: TRIVIA NIGHT

BoyzTownDenver.com HAPPY HOUR

Monday-Thursday: 3 – 8 p.m.

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$4 22-ounces tanks of your choice.

Compete for free drinks and bar tabs, starting at 7:30 p.m., $3 Smirnoff.

Monday–Thursday: Absolut $4.50 Friday & Sunday: Stoli $4.50 Friday–Sunday: 3Olives $4.50

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Snow, icy roads and 24-degree temperatures weren’t enough to keep a few dart aficionados from their game at the R & R Lounge on January 31. | Photos by Charles Broshous

GO-GO FRIDAYS: NO COVER

SUNDAYS Martinis & Misbehavin’ with Cora Vette and $8 Kettle One martinis

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e Resting and Relaxing at the R & R

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18 + dance party Cover: 18-20 $10, 21+ $5 after 10 p.m.

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7 - 10 a.m. & 5 - 8 p.m. $2.50 wells, $3 domestic longnecks, $2 off calls FRIDAY & SATURDAY DANCE PARTIES

$3 Well Vodka & $5 Svedka; No cover BEER BUSTS

DenverWrangler.com Geeks who Drink Pub Trivia 8 p.m. $2 house vodka, Bud & Coors pints SATURDAYS

$3 Svedka // 2nd Saturday SWEET 5th Saturday RETRO SWEET! SUNDAYS: BEER BUST

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$8 Legendary Beer Bust (4-8 p.m.)

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MONDAY–SATURDAY

$4 for a 32 oz. domestic pitcher and $8 for a premium pitcher

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XBarDenver.com BOGO happy hour: 3 p.m. – 6 p.m. $5 lemonade buckets all day

$10 Buddy Beer Bust, 5 p.m. $3 Absolut, 9 p.m.

SATURDAYS: $5 Beer Bust, 2 p.m.

SUNDAYS: Drag show, 9 p.m.

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FOR TWITTER UPDATES AND INTERACTIVE MAP GO TO OFCNOW.CO/BTAB

Cupid’s Undie Run • February. 8 The 2014 Cupid’s Undie Run was held in downtown Denver on February 8. About two hundred costumed cupids donned their bedroom best for the mile(ish) run from Stoney’s Bar and Grill to Civic Park and back. Proceeds from the event benefit The Children’s Tumor Foundation.| Photos by Charles Broshous

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OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

| FEBRUARY 5, 2014 | 31

THE REAL REASON PEOPLE OPPOSE GAY MARRIAGE RADIOACTIVE VISION Nuclia Waste

Same-sex couples ‘get’ each other and equality opponents are jealous

G WELL, OUR SECRET IS OUT. When it comes to relationships, gays are happier than straights. Of course, we already knew that. That’s why we are called “gay” in the first place. We are just happy, happy people.

Across the pond in the United Kingdom, the Open University released a 96-page study on relationships and found that gay couples are more positive and generally happier about their relationships than straight couples. They also found that straight couples are less likely to be there for each other, make couple time, pursue shared interests, to say “I love you” and to talk openly with one another.

Gay couples are happy. Straight couples are miserable. Think back to any family Thanksgiving dinner, and you know this to be true.

The reason that straight people have been opposing gay marriage is not that it “undermines” traditional marriage. The real reason is that straight people do not want us to be happier than they are. They are miserable in their relationships and cannot abide to see us wallowing in our joyous, marital bliss. Add in the fact that our weddings are more fabulous, more fashionable and more fun, and it’s just too much for them to bear.

The study also found that couples without children were far happier than those that were shuttling offspring back and forth to soccer. No surprise there either. Do you remember how much grief and agony you caused your parents growing up? I rest my case. I am certain my parents took up drinking and smoking after having us kids rather than vice versa. I came out as gay and wanted to grow up to be a starving artist.

My sister got pregnant before she was married and my brother’s fascination with fireworks and explosives took my parent’s stress to a whole new crazy.

All you gay couples thinking about having gaybies may wish to reconsider. Granted, your being in a gay relationship rockets you to the top of the happy meter, but those late night bottle feedings and poopy diaper changes might ratchet you down a notch or three.

While the study attributes couple happiness to being gay or straight, I think it’s much more about the difference between men and women.

I am surprised straight marriage works at all. Two guys are just gonna get along. They get each other. They are on the same emotion wavelength. Same thing for women. Gay relationships are the ultimate mind/body meld.

But put a man and woman together and ask them to get along and you’ve really got a challenge. Men are from Mars and women are from Venus. Trying to get them to live together on the same planet, let alone in the same house, is just inviting disaster. And straight marriage doesn’t most of the time, if you consider the divorce rate.

When people ask Mr. Waste and me the secret to our 17 years together, we tell them it comes down to the three C’s: caring, communication and compromise.

CARING — you need to love and care for your partner.

COMMUNICATION — you need to talk to your partner and be on the same page.

COMPROMISE — no two people are ever going to get along completely, so there has to be a little give and take in the partnership.

If you can master the three C’s, you can be as happy as a gay couple.

Nuclia Waste, the triple-nipple drag queen of comedy, is Out Front’s radioactive cultural columnist. See more columns at ofcnow.co/nuclia or contact her through her website at NucliaWaste.com.

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HOT EVENTS

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CONTENT Or date F p u s t sday. n e e n v d e e & s yw ox t’s new MaILed ever .co/outb n O r F . eow Out OradO ee at ofcn L O C t Fr LGB IBe FOr r C s B su

OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

| FEBRUARY 5, 2014 | 33

ON THE SCENE

Goodwill Fashion Show

EXDO // Feb. 6 photos by Charles Broshous Goodwill’s 4th Annual Good Exchange Fashion Show & Clothing Swap was held February 6 at the EXDO Event Center with Emmy award-winning fashion guru Tim Gunn and Denver’s Mondo Guerra. Guests got a sneak peek at some of Denver’s up-and-coming young fashion designers which featured designs by students from Goodwill’s youth programs at local high schools. Area celebrities also modeled clothing from Goodwill’s Déjà Blue Boutique.

See more photos online at ofcnow.co/exchange

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ON THE SCENE

Red Tie Affair Denver Museum of Nature and Science // Feb. 1 photos by Charles Broshous The Denver Colorado AIDS Project’s Red Tie Affair celebrated three decades of service in the Denver metro community and featured cocktails, dinner, a historical presentation and a video tribute. Honorees included; Julian Rush, the founding Executive Director of the Colorado AIDS Project for 17 years of leadership, The Gill Foundation for three decades of philanthropic support, Out Front for their media partnership since the beginning of the pandemic in 1981, Dean Gonyea for his dedication to the Food Bank and the DCAP Regional Council and Jane Bohlen for more than 20 years of volunteer service.

See more photos online at ofcnow.co/7cD

OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

| FEBRUARY 19, 2014 | 35

look for our interview with Manila Luzon in our March 5 issue

INTERVIEW

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| FEBRUARY 19, 2014 | OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

CAZWELL: ALL RAPPED UP THE RACY GAY RAPPER DISHES ON HIS NEW SINGLE WITH MANILA LUZON, ‘HELEN KELLER’

By Berlin Sylvestre

H

ow do you interview Cazwell? While prepping on that lazy winter Wednesday, I wasn’t honestly sure what to ask a rising star whose sexually energetic lyrics raise more than just roofs, but after picking up the phone to a warm greeting, I could tell Cazwell would be up for anything.

His dirty-boy persona is complemented nicely by his feet-on-the-ground modesty and easily won laugh that’s every bit as adorable as the boyish gap in his teeth. Though he’s regarded by many as topshelf eye candy, the playfully self-deprecating artisan of modern hip-hop with crystalline eyes, a tatted hardbody and a tough-guy sneer is more than just eye candy — he’s also a clever, beatsdriven poet with an ear for new-school cool. Oh, and he’s also into guys.

While tending to his dying plants from an NYC apartment, Cazwell rapped with Out Front on life, love and the pursuit of Judge Judy.

Berlin Sylvestre: What’s going on in the life of Cazwell right now?

Cazwell: I just turned in the last song for my new album, Hard 2 B Fresh, and I’m gonna be dropping a video for every song on the album, so I’ve got a lot to do. I’m also working on a new Amanda LePore album.

Uh oh! So what’s your writing process like?

Sometimes I hear a beat and (get inspired to) work a song around it, and sometimes it’s just something I want to talk about. The first thing that comes to mind is a track on my new album called Dance Like You Got Good Credit. I heard a drag queen say it and thought, ‘Oh, we gotta work on that!’”

I really dig your sense of rhythm. You play any musical instruments?

I don’t, actually, but I’m really savvy with what people want to hear. I deejay four or five nights a week in New York City, so I stay connected to what the people like. Just about every song on my new album is a floor banger.

Was there ever a “this is my one chance to make it or break it” moment starting out?

I have them at least twice a year! Every time I make a video, I’m taking such a financial gamble. I pay for all my videos hoping that I’ll get a string of shows in return and sometimes that happens, sometimes it doesn’t. When I dropped my video for “Tonight,” I loved it. A lot of people didn’t get it, because the person I was with (in the video) was transgender.

“Ice Cream Truck” really helped my career. But it’s important that you keep going, through the constant ups and the downs. The first song that really got me gigs was “All Over Your Face” and I was riding that wave for awhile, but you have to realize that eight months later, people get over it and you need to constantly drop (new songs).

What I like now, though, is that people like me for my personality and my skills as a rapper.

It’s no longer like, “Oh, a gay rapper.” It’s, “Oh, Cazwell. Yeah, I like Cazwell.” But you can’t take yourself that seriously, because no one is taking you that seriously. I really want people to find me relatable in some way.

To Judge Judy a sucka is to... ...put that bitch on blast and check her in front of ten million people!

About the name of the new song, Helen Keller.

Did you brace for possible controversy?

No, there hasn’t been much at all. I have a special affection for Helen Keller. We have the same birthday and she’s supposed to be the personification of determination. I used to think about her when I was first getting started. I thought, “If she could make it happen without being able to see or hear, then I can make it as a gay white rapper.”

On Manilla Luzon and their collaboration for ‘Hellen Keller:’ We actually shot this video eight months ago, but we started writing it five months before that. Manila texted me like, “We should really do a song together.” and I was like “Yeah! I reallly like Manila.” But I didn’t want to do a pop-y drag song. I was like, “Bitch, I’m gonna make you rap your ass off.” At first I wanted to her to sound really fishy, like a real girl, I really worked hard on perfecting that beat.

Any inspiration behind the track?

Yeah, I was going through a breakup with someone who I’d been with for five years, so we were still running in the same social circles. If I saw him out, I’d say, “I don’t see him, I don’t hear him.”

Helen Keller.

What’s an album in a guy’s musical arsenal that takes a guy from “kinda hot” to “hot as hell?”

My album, definitely. And The Teaches of Peaches.

We’ve worked together. Our careers started at the same time, but she’s been famous longer than I’ve been gaymous. She’s super-cool, she’s one of us.

She’s a really unapologetic artist and I love that.

Name three celebs you’d love to knock boots with.

Bruno Mars is really cute, but he can’t wear the fedora or have the fro-look. I like the pompadour. I love those pocket gays. I’d like a 90-minute makeout session with him. I like the Asian in “The Walking Dead.” I like the guy with the big nose on “Girls.” He plays What’s-Her-Name’s boyfriend.

What’s the last book you read?

Take It Like A Man, the Boy George autobiography.

He’s really cool. We did a track together in 2005.

What personality trait is an absolute turn off?

Cheap people. Like bad tippers and people who say like, “I only had a small slice of the pizza, so I don’t have to chip in as much.” I guess I mean greedy.

To Helen Keller someone means you don’t see or hear them. Using other names, fill in the blank.

To Madonna someone is to... ...sleep with someone thirty years younger than me.

To Lady Gaga that ass is to... ...take that idea and make it look like I thought of it first. Or to overaccessorize.

To Manila Luzon someone out the frame is to ... ...give someone the chop. ¢

Cazwell on what not to do at a Cazwell show: People should not stand there with their arms crossed. Just be in a state of mind to have fun. Don’t go there with your nagging ex or shady friends. Go there with your crew who wants to get turned up. I don’t like going to those places where everybody’s just sitting in their chair wanting you to perform. My show is interactive. I like to throw a party with the crowd and get loose. I’m like a drag queen working for tips.

Cazwell on touring: There are some places you go where people are really conservative with how they act. People act so differently in different towns. You can tell how their society treats gay people by how they act at a show. If you go to Atlanta or San Francisco, people really let loose and have fun. You go to Greenville, North Carolina, or some other place that doesn’t have a gay pride [event], they don’t really know how to act. Pride is such a big element of my shows.

Cazwell on getting away from the crowd: I don’t feel super-famous. I definitely go certain places and get some respect and I really appreciate that. I’m gay-mous. My favorite thing in the world to do is chill … like sit on the couch and watch “Judge Judy” and just chill. I love her. She knows exactly what questions to ask, she’s just fierce. I’m a Cancer, so I like to just stay home and relax.

Cazwell on pot: I smoke, but maybe like once a week. I like blunts or straight-up joints. When I was younger, I’d hit bongs.

But I don’t smoke like I used to because it affects my breath control on stage. I’m really active on stage and I don’t want to be out of breath. Just one puff or two. I’m not one of those people who always has an ounce in my bedside table, you know? I don’t have to wake and bake every day. I prefer to do it at home.

To Betty White is to... ...get straight stupid on that ass.

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| FEBRUARY 19, 2014 | 37

FASHION

SEEN @ {A•(S)HĒ}

SEEN @ HAMBURGER MARY’S

ASHE BOWEN

JOSUE LEDEZMA

W H AT W E ’ R E W E A R I N G

W H AT I N S P I R E S Y O U R S T Y L E ?

I stick with modern 90’s aesthetic with a twist. Preppy chic, a bit dapper, like a tapered ankle pants with polo shirts.

W H AT ’ S Y O U R F A V O R I T E P I E C E O F C L O T H I N G ?

My Ralph Lauren button up dress shirts and I love my boots.

H O W D O Y O U A P P R O A C H T H E Q U E S T I O N , “ W H AT TO W E A R ? ” I am an artist and everything I wear is a piece of inspiration. I don’t follow fashion magazines, I like to think of a theme & base my outfit off of that. If I feel like a pirate that day, I will draw inspiration from that & recreate the image of a pirate.

PHOTOS BY DENEE PINO

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| FEBRUARY 19, 2014 | OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

BEAUTY

Family Centered Medicine

Serving the GLBT community for over 15 years Primary Healthcare

Peter Prutch, NP.C, PhD

HIV/AIDS Health care & prevention

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Cruelty-free beauty products

Testing on animals is still common, but here are some brands that don’t

By Kelsey Lindsey

B

eing raised by a veterinarian comes with a certain amount of give and take. While I always had an endless number of kittens and puppies to snuggle at the clinic, we also always had no fewer than five animals (dogs, cats, lizards, you name it) to take care of at home. I never complained — the seemingly-endless parade of animals we fostered was a testament to my mother’s neverending care, an attribute I couldn’t criticize, no matter how many shoes I lost to teething puppies.

Another childhood memory: searching the small print of all my beauty products for that golden phrase: “Not Tested on Animals.”

Oil-free, dermatologist tested or for sensitive skin were rendered meaningless marketing gimmicks if the touted product didn’t come with a promise of being “cruelty-free.”

As I grew older, I became less fervent in my concern for animals — adhering to the advice of beauty columns and commercials that appealed only to my looks and well-being. I want to think that part of my lapse was naïve, that in this day and age it’s reasonable to think animal testing has been protested out of mainstream practice the same way fur and ivory have — now considered cruel and severely outdated. What type of company would want to align their products with those adjectives?

To my chagrin, I’ve since found that a multitude of companies see no fault in animal testing. The list has many familiar brand names for lotions, toothpaste and makeup, some of which currently reside in my medicine cabinet and makeup bag. After surprise comes regret that I’ve become lazy, expecting things I deeply disapprove of to go away by the efforts of others and not my own.

If you would like to join me in this cause, here’s a list of beauty brands committed to producing products without harming animals: • Arbonne International • Aveda • Bare Escentuals • Burt’s Bees • Conair • Dermalogica • E.L.F Cosmetics • Physicians Formula • NYX Los Angeles • Smashbox Cosmetics • The Body Shop • Too Faced Cosmetics • Urban Decay • Wet n Wild • Yes to Carrots Kelsey Lindsey is Out Front’s beauty columnist writing from an affirming perspective on being your best you. See more beauty columns at ofcnow.co/ beauty or contact Kelsey at kelsey.a.lindsey@gmail.com.

OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

| FEBRUARY 19, 2014 | 39

URBANISM

Life’s better when you mix it up

Why devoting whole neighborhoods to a single use should be a thing of the past

By Ken Schroeppel URBANISTS USE THE TERM MIXED USE TO DESCRIBE A NEIGHBORHOOD OR A PARTICULAR SITE that has more than one type of activity going on. Today, urban areas that contain a mix of uses are generally considered to be safer, more interesting, and more vital economically. Why is this?

Historically, cities naturally grew in a mixed-use way. Someone would build an apartment building here.

Someone else would build a store across the street. Then a school, maybe a church, an office, and more homes would follow down the block. Different uses developed in response to what people needed or wanted at the time, and everything was relatively close by and easy to get to. Cities also didn’t have a lot of regulation back then either — property owners could pretty much do what they wanted with their property.

Eventually, however, we discovered that some uses weren’t all that appropriate next to each other. Do we

t we’ve go

what

really want kids going to school across the street from a factory belching out black coal smoke? So the idea of zoning was invented to separate land uses into different geographic zones in the city: housing goes over here, offices go over there, and factories go way over there.

By the 1950s, this idea had become immensely popular and virtually every city in America was growing with all of its different uses segregated into different zones.

This widespread geographic separation of land uses in cities led to an overreliance — if not outright dependency — on the automobile to get anywhere, which resulted in all sorts of problems. But another consequence of single-use districts is that they are typically active during only one part of the day, leaving them deserted the rest of the time. People generally feel more comfortable and safe when other people are around, so single-use districts by their nature can become unappealing places for many hours or even days at a time.

Take, for example, the typical office

park. During the work day when the offices are full of people, there’s a lot of activity going on and it feels like a perfectly pleasant and safe environment. But during the evenings and weekends, the typical office park becomes a dead zone: everything is closed and no people are around.

I was reminded of the downside of single-use districts the other day when I wrote on my DenverInfill blog about a new museum planned for Denver’s Golden Triangle Museum District. The notion of a museum district sounds great at first. Concentrating all of your city’s museums into one area can create a vibrant and stimulating environment — when the museums are open. But in the evening when the museums are closed?

Adjacent to the Museum District is the rest of the Civic Center area, including the State Capitol, the City & County Building, and many other government buildings — all of which are closed during the evenings and weekends. So despite the eye-catching architecture and the venerable purposes, many

people don’t find the Civic Center and Museum District to be a particularly appealing place to hang out during the evenings. Why? Lack of people!

To realize the full potential of Denver’s treasured Civic Center and Museum District, we need to integrate among all those museums and government buildings a mix of uses that are busy with people during the evening hours — like restaurants, shops, hotels, and housing that will allow the area to feel safe, engaging, and vibrant 24/7.

What about your community?

Could the areas where you live or work benefit from a sprinkle of different uses to make them more comfortable and interesting places? As a general recipe for a successful urban area: mix it up!

Ken Schroeppel is a Denver urban planner and the founder of denverinfill.com, a website and blog that reports on Denver construction projects and urban development.

Ken also teaches urban and regional planning at the University of Colorado at Denver.

or

king f oo l e r ’ u yo

ng@

marketi 40

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.com

line n o t n o fr out

AUTO

Crossovers driving value for families Two CUVs offering flexibility and innovation for one of the most popular vehicle types

By Jonathan McGrew CROSSOVER UTILITY VEHICLES, A.K.A. CROSSOVERS OR CUVS, ARE POPULAR HERE IN THE STATES. The midsize CUV segment is one of the most competitive markets. This was a topic of conversation at the 2014 Toyota Highlander launch presentation; a vehicle that has undergone dramatic change in the name of appealing to more families. You might have even seen their Super Bowl ad with the Muppets.

More about the Highlander in a second; it is just one example of a CUV that has recently been completely redesigned. Then, there is the Dodge Journey, which was new to the market for 2009. It is a midsize CUV that offers seven-passenger seating and is likely to see a redesign in 2016.

As you can see, a lot of investment is put into this vehicle category. The 2014 Dodge Journey Crew Limited AWD is no exception with innovative features like under passenger-seat storage (the seat cushion flips forward to reveal useful hidden space!) and covered recessed storage areas in the floor ahead of the second row. There is also the optional entertainment package and standard 8.4 inch touch screen display that controls everything from the driver assistance and safety features to the radio and climate control.

With the All-Wheel Drive (AWD) system you have the confidence to drive around the city or out on the highway in the snow. Add the power of the 283-hp Pentastar V6 and you can get moving to 60 mph in under 8 seconds while getting decent fuel economy of 16/24 mpg city/hwy. What is there to dislike?

I had not recently considered the Journey with some of that credit going to its Avengeresque styling. The experience with the Journey reminded me of what a competitive vehicle it is,

2014 Toyota Highlander even if a redesign is in its future. And, in my humble opinion, you just can’t beat the touch screen user interface.

Turning our attention to the all-new 2014 Toyota Highlander, the first impression is that it is a pretty bold move by Toyota.

The styling requires them to bend their own rules in sheet metal forming and they have changed the rear suspension to a double wishbone allowing for more interior room. More room translates into 8-passenger seating in a vehicle that is actually shorter than the Dodge Journey. It also provides an improved dynamic driving experience (read: better handling).

The Highlander has improved from almost every angle.

The interior is more refined and similar to family vehicles like the Camry. They added soft touch interior appointments and a center console that will hold a large Coach purse (or 70+ juice boxes).

The only place that hasn’t improved in the new Highlander is under the hood with the 3.5-Liter V6 engine. Toyota didn’t let their loyal buyers down, but instead focused on upgrading the AWD system and providing a revised 6-speed transmission that improves inclement weather handling and fuel efficiency giving it an EPA rating of 18/25 mpg city/hwy with the AWD, the best mpg of midsize CUVs. As we wind down this Auto article, you can see why this is such a competitive vehicle category. CUVs like the Journey and Highlander are competing tooth and nail for the family buyer — a buyer today that wants style, a fun and safe driving experience and, most of all, flexibility. For that, these are two CUVs you can’t ignore. A point of difference: the Journey tested at $35,305 and a comparable Highlander will run you easily $5,000 more.

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| FEBRUARY 19, 2014 | 41

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Feline frustration during fornication

SEXUALITY

Dear Shanna-

The tomboy who was

A childhood unrequited love

By Berlin Sylvestre EVEN BEFORE I KNEW THAT TWO GIRLS BEING in a relationship was a thing, I knew I was in the process of wooing Jessica. I’d ride her back and forth between our houses on my polished-for-theoccasion bicycle and hope that she’d realize (and actually like) that I was sweet on her. Overcome with love in this daydream of mine, she’d throw her arms around my neck, legs bending at the knees as I lifted her triumphantly into the air, and declare her love for me, too. Cheesy, I know, but not to her. In my dreams, I won her heart with Hollywood romance — and extra dessert.

In real life, I was merely showering her with the extra Capri Suns I brought every day just for her while making sure she spelled everything correctly on our daily writing assignments. I’d pass innocent notes that she never respond to (Hey, let’s build a fort today!) and try to mask my excitement when she got in the recess line next to me. And each day, just as the day before, my task was to hide my jealousy and sulk alone at the tetherball pole as she ditched me for the obnoxious boys who lashed her with rude and stupid criticisms of her fetching red hair. Sadly, predictably, Jessica never came to love me before her family moved out of the school district.

In fact, it was years later in the neighboring town that I spotted Jessica and a group of her friends at the mall. I, being 13 and having excused myself from my mother in the food court, felt a surge of excitement and nerves at seeing Jes in her maturing splendor. I felt confident that I too radiated the same amount of ‘cool’ and approached the suddenly quiet horde. The conversation went something like this: Me: “Jessica! Hey! Long time no see!”

Jessica: “Berlin?”

Me: “Yeah!” *Awkward silence until someone coughs “dyke!” and they erupt in laughter — even Jessica.* I stood there, the wan smile I copped evaporating in defeat. She just sat there, the one-time girl of my dreams, leaning into her friends, conspiring further by not taking up for me. She could’ve shushed them, could’ve thrown a kind word my way or even apologized, but that would never happen. She was laughing with them, giddy in the glow of their cruelty. In that bustling food court in Macon, GA ... in front of God and everyone, I learned hatred for myself.

All the way home, quietly crying with my head 44

| FEBRUARY 19, 2014 | OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

on the passenger window, I watched the light poles whoosh by through angry tears. How could I have been so bold, so foolish? I seethed with rage, but not for them. It’s so obvious you’re a dyke, I derided me, then surveyed myself: red Chuck Taylors, a brown leather wristband, a T-shirt with a set of drums on it, stressed jeans, and no make-up or girly hair to offset all the dudeliness. When I get home, I’m burning all these! Instead I put them in a garbage bag along with my other “guy stuff,” and pushed them into a dark corner in the back of my closet.

For the next five years, I would take pride in the skirts and dresses I acquired on femme-mission shopping trips and marvel at how everyone liked “new me” so much more. And new me appreciated the company. New me thought, “I’ve never felt such kinship! People wanna hang out now!” My new chick-friends from school started calling the house to invite me places and my social life took off. I finally belonged to a group so tight, we could be as rude as we wanted to losers in the food court (should we choose) and never have to worry about backup or approval. This, ladies and gents, was my arrival into the Cool Kids Club, where the price of admission was conformity and the reapings were shallow friends and internal turmoil.

The girls taught me how to curl my hair and do my makeup, but it was all smoke and mirrors and I knew it. Because our motivations weren’t the same, our experiences were night and day. While they fawned over guys and laughed a little too hard at their dumb jokes, I had to fend off hostile remarks made by dudes who took offense to my not laughing. The other girls at the pool party would give handjobs under the water; I’d while away the hours playing basketball with their little brothers.

As the other girls progressed to “fingerbanging,” I opted to stay home and play Mario Kart alone.

On my very last day of “being cool,” I was dropped off at the mall and joined up with the pack who, as promised, would be behind JCPenney.

The guys were smoking cigarettes while the girls painted their skateboards with nail polish. I didn’t like cigarettes, but one guy’s board looked nice and worn in, so I took off through the parking lot on it.

When I came back, one of the older guys scoffed at my little adventure and asked, “What’re you, some kinda dyke?”

This time, though, I didn’t care. I belted out a fake laugh, mocking them, then headed inside to a payphone. Mom agreed to pick me up, but said she’d need me to kill an hour, which was awesome.

That gave me plenty of time to enjoy my day as a genuinely happy dyke and check out some fresh pairs of Chuck Taylors. ¢

My girlfriend is obsessed with her cat to the extent that she refused to let me lock her furry friend out of the bedroom while we are going to get down and dirty. This really ASK THE SEXPERT creeps me out; it’s like Shanna Katz the cat is watching us, waiting till we’re done to come and cuddle. I know she’s really connected with her pet, so I’m not sure how to bring it up. Ideas?

— Not Partial to Her Pussy, Washington Park Dear Not Partial to Her Pussy­— You’re going to get two answers here; one from me as a pet lover, and one from me a sexologist. As a lover of all things furry and with several cats of my own, I say what’s the big deal? If they jump on the bed, push them off. It comes with the territory of letting animals into your life.

From a relationship-supportive perspective, it sounds like it is time for some compromise. What is it that bothers you about the cat? Is it having it in the bedroom at all, having it watching you, or just when it jumps on the bed? Are there ways around it that don’t mean locking it out completely?

What happens if you do shut the door?

Will the cat just hang out quietly or will you be doing the two person tango to cries of “meOOOOOOOOW” the whole time?

Bring it up gently — not “I want the cat out!” but something like “It’s really hard to focus on going down on you when I can feel feline eyes on the back of my head — do you have any suggestions?” Create a plan — maybe the kitty gets fed, or a few extra treats, to encourage it to stay out.

Maybe there is a special “sexy time” toy that makes an appearance when you want to distract the cat.

Worse case scenario? There’s cat in the bedroom. Animals (dogs too) are attracted to human sex scents (perhaps gross, but true), and of course animals always go where you least want them to be. If a voyeur with whiskers is the biggest challenge with your sex life, it sounds to me like you have an overall pretty-satisfying one.

— Shanna Shanna Katz, M.Ed, ACS is a boardcertified sexologist, sexuality educator and author who believes in open source, accessible sexuality education. See more columns at ofcnow.co/sexpert or for more info on teaching adults to optimize their sex lives visit ShannaKatz. com. Send Shanna a question for her column at ShannaKatz@gmail.com.

Don’t yuck my yummy open relationship One-size-does-not-fit-all when it comes to relationships I GET A SURPRISING AMOUNT OF CRITICISM ABOUT MY OPEN RELATIONSHIP. I’ve been with my partner for many years, and our agreement about how we spend our time sexually with each other and other people works for us. Most of the time, disapproving comments are unsolicited, bubbling out in person or online.

The comments give me a sense of a lot of judgment toward me and my relationship, and toward others who are open. Why do people feel the need to duplicate their own relationship values on mine?

Much like opponents of same-sex marriage, there are those with a strong personal sense of right and HEINZESIGHT wrong when it comes to what relationships should look Brent Heinze like. But one gay couple’s open relationship has as little potential negative impact on the quality of overall gay relationships as gay marriage would have on heterosexual marriages — some people really feel a need to express their beliefs, but at the end of the day the value of a relationship that it is fulfilling to the people who are involved. There’s no single way to create a happy partnership — the dynamics are as unique to everyone as fingerprints.

How you spend your time alone, with your partner, or with other people should be based on what you feel supports your physical, emotional and sexual well being. Compare it to vacations: some like to visit remote places for backpacking across a mountain pass, or lay on a quiet beach in a hammock reading a book with no one else around. Other people love road trips to huge festivals, where they can find sweaty men grinding on them or make out with overgrown muscle studs. No single option is better than the other,

but it does matter who our companions are in these adventures.

There are fantastic open relationships and fantastic monogamous ones. Thankfully, the quality and long-term success of relationships appears to be independent of their basic structure, with more do with the people involved and how well each sticks to expectations or deals with difficult situations. Partner selection and effective, positive communication are ultimately the most important aspects.

That said, I can feel sympathy toward anyone feeling what we might all feel when we think we can’t find what we’re looking for.

For a single person searching for a monogamous relationship, coming across those looking for an open relationship or who are already in one and seeking an extra-curricular connection might stir up a feeling that open relationships are narrowing the dating pool.

Sexual contact does not necessarily equal love, but nor does looking for extra-curricular sexual activities necessarily mean you aren’t looking for a meaningful connection. Connection and intimacy can come in a variety of forms — over common interests, shared beliefs, great conversations or, yes, mind-blowing orgasms.

The only limitations we put on our relationships should come from us and our partners, and no one style of relationship is any more or less valid or beautiful than another. As a matter of courtesy, be careful about using your voice to pass judgment on other peoples’ situations — and speak from the heart about what’s right for you. ¢ Brent Heinze, LPC, is a licensed professional counselor. Get more HeinzeSight online at ofcnow.co/brent or send him a question for his column at PerspectiveShift@yahoo.com.

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| FEBRUARY 19, 2014 | 45

Envisioned by Boberto

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