03.13.08 Outlook Weekly - Get Green Columbus & St Patty's Day

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2 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY OWNERS AND PUBLISHERS Michael Daniels & Chris Hayes EDITOR-IN-CHIEF / ART DIRECTOR Chris Hayes hayes@outlookmedia.com

Fun was had by all including Miss Coco Peru who got to see all of Columbus from the Short North to German Villiage, Olde Town East and even the Main St. hookers. Local Talent Marie Lopez, Ida Slapter, Rose Nylon and Panzie Bloom tickled our funny bones prior PHOTOS © PROMO PRODUCTIONS to Miss Coco Peru keeping the audience engaged by talking about her childhood, Sister John and about her boyfriend Rafael...he's from Spain you know. Look for more great entertainment to hit Columbus courtesy of Promo Productions!

SNAPSHOT

ASSISTANT ART DIRECTOR / PHOTOS Robert Trautman traut@outlookmedia.com CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Mette Bach, Danielle Buckius, Wayne R Besen, Chris Crain, Jennifer Vanasco, Tom Moon, Regina Sewell, Leslie Robinson, Gregg Shapiro, Mick Weems, Julianne French, TF Barton, Romeo San Vicente, Jeff Fertig, Simon Sheppard, Tristan Taormino, Dennis Vanke, Mario Pinardi, Rick Kramer, Aaron Drake, Jennie Keplar, Scott Varner, Derrik Chinn, Dan Savage, Felice Newman, Tim Curran, Chris Hughes, Stephen J Fallon, Felice Newman, J. Eric Peters, Crystal Hawkins, Brent Wilder, Matthew Burlingame, Jacob Anderson-Minshall, Matthew Veritas Tsien, Cheri Meyers

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SNAPSHOT . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .........2 ABOUT TOWN . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ...3, 30 COMMENTARY . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .........4 COMMUNITY CORNER . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .........6 CITIZEN CRAIN . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .........8 STRAIGHT UP . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......11 GENERAL GAYETY . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......13 TRANSNATION . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......13 PET TALK . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......15 FEATURE: GREEN COLUMBUS & ST PATS DAY. . . 16-20 OUT OF TOWN . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......22 DEEP INSIDE HOLLYWOOD . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......24 ARTS . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......24 DVDIVA . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......25 INTERVIEW : TIM MILLER . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......26 THEATRE : TABLOID . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......27 CLASSIFIEDS . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......27 SEX TALK . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......28 SAVAGE LOVE . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......29 THE LAST WORD . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......31 SCOPES . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......31

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MAR 13 - MAR 19 VOLUME 12 NUMBER 37

MAR 13 - MAR 19 2008


OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 3

ABOUT TOWN by Chris Hayes FRIDAY, MARCH 14 KISS ME I’M IRISH From the Pubs of Ireland @ The Ohio Historical Center, I-71 and 17th Ave, 614.297.2300 x6, www.ohiohistory.org: Guests will begin the St. Patrick’s Day festivities with the strains of Irish instrumental music, a taste of “St. Paddy’s Punch,” a hearty Irish meal and costumed interpreters enlivening the “pub” experience. The Ohio Village Singers promise to please with their favorite Irish music, including beautiful melodies, humorous drinking songs and, a wee bit of Irish wit and wisdom. At the conclusion of the evening, guests will receive a special surprise memento. Tonight and tomorrow. 6:30p;$57, plus $4 for parking, $47 members. WHO’S THE PUPPET MASTER? Strings Attached @ The Southern Theatre, 21 E Main St, 614.340.1896: The Columbus Gay Men’s Chorus (CGMC) continues its 18th season with a dynamic musical collaboration with ProMusica Chamber Orchestra. All are invited to delight in the rich, luxurious sounds of ProMusica and the powerful choral voices of CGMC in this one-of-a-kind venue. 8p; $20-$35. FEMINISTS WELCOME Women’s History Month @ the Ohio Statehouse, High St bwt State & Broad, 614.728.2130, ohiostatehouse.org: Special Women’s History Month exhibition in Ohio Statehouse Map Room. Through Mar 31. Free. PARTY TIME 5th Annual Dublin Arts Council Garden Party @ Kilgour Building atrium on the Online Computer Library Center (OCLC) campus, 6565 Kilgour Place in Dublin, 614.889.7444: The evening features fine food and beverages from top area restaurants, a silent auction and more. All event proceeds support Dublin Arts Council’s (DAC) many arts and arts education programs, including the DAC Sundays at Scioto free summer concert series in Scioto Park, DAC’s Visual Arts Series in the only gallery of its kind in Dublin, new and exciting Art in Public Places projects and art classes for all ages. 6:30p9:30p; $100. SATURDAY, MARCH 15 POLITICALLY SPEAKING NINA ’08 @ Axis, 775 N High St, 614.291.4008, columbusnightlife.com: Is the country ready for a drag queen president? I think so. Well head to Ms West’s show and find out. Hopefully the platform can support her! Tonight, tomorrow and Mar 29 (the rescheduled snow date). See ad this page for more info. 7p; $8-$50. CITY OF ANGELS The Angels of Lemnos @ MadLab, 105 N. Grant Ave, 614.221.5418, www.madlab.net: Nathan Spandrel spends the frigid winter days on the streets of the city searching for his “Gift from God” promised to him by his fifth grade teacher. We follow this child-like man’s journey through his present and past. Nathan finds his “Gift”, an abandoned baby in a city trash can. He believes the baby is an angel that fell from the sky and is determined to take his “angel baby” floating back to heaven. He spends a touching moment giving up his precious living gift. Nathan learns that redemption and lasting peace can only be attained through the forgive-

ness of those that haunt him from his past. Through March 29. 8p; $6-$15. SUNDAY, MARCH 16 A LEAGUE OF THEIR OWN Lesbian Softball League Sign-Up Party @ Club Diversity, 863 S High St, 614.224.4050, clubdiversity.com: The all-lesbian-all-the-time softball league’s spring sign-up party got snowed out last weekend (got to love the irony) and so they have moved it to this Saturday, March 16. All women are invited to come find out more information, sign-up or just socialize with the leagues at Club Diversity (863 N High St) from 2p-4p; free. BATTER UP Columbus Lesbian And Gay Softball Association Registration Party @ Score Bar, 145 N 5th St, 614.849.0099, scorebarcolumbus.com: The Columbus Lesbian and Gay Softball Association (CLGSA) kicks off its 2008 season with a player registration party. See page 6 for all the details. I HEARD SHE CHOKED ON A DIET PILL Tabloid The Musical @ Shadowbox Cabaret, Easton Towne Center, 614.416.7625, shadowboxcabaret.com: After a ten year hiatus from self-producing original, full-length musical productions Shadowbox returns with Tabloid The Musical premiering tonight! Smart, witty, and upbeat Tabloid weaves the lives of a recently deceased starlet and her estranged family with a tabloid columnist and the paparazzi. Sundays through April 13. 7:30p, $20 / $10 students and seniors. MONDAY, MARCH 17 - ST PATRICK’S DAY SEE PAGE 20 FOR DETAILS. THURSDAY, MARCH 20 WHERE’S TONYA? Smucker’s Stars on Ice @ U.S. Bank Arena Cincinatti, 513.562.4949, www.ticketmaster.com: For more than two decades, Olympic Champion and figure skating icon Scott Hamilton has thrilled audiences of all ages with the Emmy Award-winning . Now in its 22nd year, America’s premier figure skating tour is proud to present “Live and In Color,” the allnew Smucker’s Stars on Ice production featuring Olympic Silver medalist Sasha Cohen, Ilia Kulik, Jamie Salé & David Pelletier, Todd Eldredge, Yuka Sato, Michael Weiss, Kyoko Ina & John Zimmerman, Jennifer Robinson, Xue Shen & Hongbo Zhao, and Marie-France Dubreuil & Patrice Lauzon. 7p; $25 and up. PULL MY FINGER No Fool’n @ Verne Riffe Center’s Capitol Theatre, 77 S High St, 614.469.1045: The Legacy Fund Honors presents and evening honoring Fred Holdridge and Howard Burns. SUNDAY, MARCH 30 GAY FOR PAY Out@Wex @ Wexner Center for the Arts, 1871 N. High St, 614.292.3535, wexarts.org: The three films that were postponed due to the blizzard will be shown on today. Bill Jones-related programming will likely take place in August. Wex will honor tickets that were purchased for Saturday, March 8. 1p: Before I Forget; 3p: Lagerfeld; Confidential; 5p: Itty Bitty Titty Committee; $8-$10. MAR 13 - MAR 19 2008


The Reader Poll

4 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

COMMENTARY by Jennifer Vanasco

Last week we asked:

What is your all-time favorite queer movie?

Make Hate Crimes Legislation Happen in Our Time Last week, people gathered in a vigil in Florida, to mark the place where 17-year-old transgender teenager Simmie Williams was gunned down. A day after Williams was murdered, Melbourne Brunner, a gay man, was beaten severely only a few miles away, by a man who was taunting Brunner and his partner for being “faggots.” Last month, too, vigils were held across the country to protest the murder earlier in February of Lawrence King, a gay, 15-year-old Californian who was shot by a classmate – because King asked him to be his Valentine. Enough. It is time to pass the federal hate crimes bill. This year marks the 10th anniversary of Matthew Shepard’s brutal murder. Lawrence King was 5 when Shepard was robbed, pistol-whipped, tortured and left to die. The current hate crimes bill is named for him, and it is already 11 years too late. Williams and Brunner’s state of Florida includes sexual orientation in its state hate crimes bill, but not transgender people; King’s state of California includes sexual orientation and gender identity. But 17 states – including Wyoming, where Matthew Shepard was killed – include no such protection. And only 12 states (12!) protect transgender people. A federal law would protect everyone. The Matthew Shepard Act is a federal hate crimes bill which would authorize the Department of Justice to get involved in local hate crimes based on the victim’s actual or perceived sexual orientation, gender, gender identity or disability, whether or not the local police decided to investigate, and whether or not the victim was engaged in a federally pro-

tected activity like voting. Current law includes only race, color, religion or national origin. The Matthew Shepard Act passed the House last session, and activists celebrated. Then it passed the Senate as an amendment to a defense bill, and there was jubilation. Many GLBTs think that this means it passed, and it will become law. Not so. In a last-minute bit of political maneuvering, a Senate committee stripped the Matthew Shepard Act from the defense bill, partly because it became clear they wouldn’t be able to override the White House’s threatened veto. The bill hasn’t passed yet because some ministers on the Right are worried that it would take away their “right” to hate speech in the pulpit, where they like to denounce homosexuals. That wouldn’t happen. They could go on denouncing all they like, though I wish they wouldn’t. And some on the left don’t like it either, because they say that all crimes are crimes of hate, and that hate crimes laws just ignore the impact of regular old murders. But the Matthew Shepard Act does more than send money and staff to local law enforcement agencies who otherwise wouldn’t be able to afford to investigate hate crimes. It also would serve as a powerful symbol, which is what many of the best laws do. It is a symbol that says, “Enough!” It is a symbol that says, “We value gay people and transgendered people and women and disabled people enough to protect them.” It is a symbol that says, “This society will not tolerate you hurting this person just because you are

offended that he wears jewelry, or she sleeps with other women, or she was born a male.” The events of the past weeks show clearly that this message is an important one – because 10 years after the death of Matthew Shepard, people are still not getting it. Instead, people are getting the message that it is just fine to denigrate GLBT people and call them names in the street. It is OK to say that things we don’t like “are gay.” It is no problem at all to hate GLBT people, because no one will stand up for us. The Matthew Shepard Act – like the Employers Non-Discrimination Act, like marriage, is the federal government standing up for us. And we need them. The Matthew Shepard Act will be reintroduced in the House on March 20 and in the Senate on April 12. Contact your senators and representatives today to let them know how important this bill is. Call the White House – over and over again, jam their phone lines, fill their email boxes – and tell President Bush not to veto the bill when it passes. And for good measure, sign the petition at MatthewShepard.org. There must not be another Simmie Williams, not another Melbourne Brunner, not another Lawrence King. There must not be another Matthew Shepard. If we speak loudly enough, and often enough, our representatives will hear us. It is up to us. Help pass the bill.

• Trick 20% • Hedwig and the Angry Inch 13% Other votes: • The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert and a little indie film about AIDS from the early 90's - Zero Patience • The Birdcage • All Over the Guy • Girls Will Be Girls • Beautiful Thing • My Beautiful Laundrette • Maurice • Jeffrey • Doña Herlinda and her Son • Once upon a time, we rented an apart ment with a very 80s pink bathroom that we dealt with by decorating it with a pinkflamingo motif. Upon seeing it, our friends dubbed it The John Waters Memorial Bath room and made a serious habit of watching John Waters movies together. So, I'm going to have to go with any movie directed by John Waters or if you're going to be bitchy and make me choose just one I'll say A Dirty Shame. NEXT WEEKS QUESTIONS:

Jennifer Vanasco is an award-winning, syndicated columnists. She edits and blogs daily on the gay political website VisibleVote08.com. Email her at jennifer.vanasco@gmail.com.

DO YOU RECYCLE ? Log on to: www.outlookweekly.net to take this week’s poll.

GR O UP

19%

S

OU RC E:

MAR 13 - MAR 19 2008

AM ERICAN RESE

CH AR

CATEGORY

NOV 2 ’04

MAR 10 ’08

DIFFERENCE

AMERICAN DEAD

1,122

3,980

2,858

AMERICAN WOUNDED

8,124

29,320

21,196

IRAQI CIVILIAN DEAD

16,342

89,353

73,011

NATIONAL DEBT

$7,429,629,954,236

$9,395,022,427,279

DAYS ‘TIL 2008 ELECTION

1,463

239

$1,965,392,473,043 (1,224)


OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 5

MAR 13 - MAR 19 2008


6 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

COMMUNITY CORNER

HELP END WORKPLACE DISCRIMINATION IN OHIO Our state’s historically chilly reception to gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people is well documented, yet there is evidence of a warming trend.

LAVENDER LISTINGS ADVERTISING DEADLINE EXTENDED TO MARCH 15 - YOU CAN STILL GET IN

Dear Stonewall Columbus Supporter: Stonewall Columbus extended the deadline for submission to the 2008-2009 Lavender Listings. This year will be our 24th edition of the resource directory. Thank you for your support in the past. As an advertiser in this resource directory your business becomes a valuable part of the local gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender community. The proceeds from the Lavender Listings give much needed financial support to keep the center open and able to address the needs of the Community in Columbus. It is also an important reference for our volunteers to provide referrals to those that contact the center. As part of the annual Lavender Listings, your business is recognized as being GLBT-friendly and serving this very large demographic group. Locally there are more than 70,000 GLBT consumers, with a spending power of over $2 million annually. The Lavender Listings will give you a direct link to this community. Recent surveys indicate that GLBT customers are loyal to a GLBT-friendly business and are more likely to spend repeatedly where they know there is support of their community. The Lavender Listings will again increase distri-

OXFORD OHIO PASSES NON-DISCIMINATION LAW Oxford City Council by a vote of 7-0 passed the newly amended Chapter 143 of the Oxford Code of Ordinances that includes nondiscrimination protections on the basis of sexual orientation, gender identity and sex, etc. They join 16 other municipalities in Ohio affording these protections...and are one of only 4 that include gender identity. They add nearly 22,000 people to the number of Ohioans now protected by local ordinances. The newly amended ordinance will take effect 30 days from March 4, 2008.

LESBIAN SOFTBALL LEAGUE RESCHEDULES SIGN-UP FOR SATURDAY The all-lesbian-all-the-time softball league’s spring sign-up party got snowed out last weekend (got to love the irony) and so they have moved it to this Saturday, March 16. All women are invited to come find out more information, sign-up or just socialize with the leagues at Club Diversity (863 N High St) from 2p-4p. Good times for all.

COLUMBUS LESBIAN AND GAY SOFTBALL ASSOCIATION REGISTRATION PARTIES The Columbus Lesbian and Gay Softball AssociaMAR 13 - MAR 19 2008

bution this year in Central Ohio. It is a free resource to the community; as such, we hope that you will accept a few extra copies to hand out at your business. We will work with local businesses and center volunteers to ensure that copies of the Lavender Listings will be accessible on a larger scale than in the past. It will reach and be used by more than 25,000 people. They will be available for distribution this year in May. As an advertiser in the Lavender Listings you will have the opportunity to place an ad online at the Stonewall Columbus web site for additional daily exposure to the local GLBT community. Above you will find more information about the 2008/2009 advertising options and an order form. Should you have any questions please do not hesitate to contact us. We look forward to working with you this year. Karla Rothan Executive Director Stonewall Columbus tion (CLGSA) kicks off its 2008 season with two player registration parties. For 27 years, the CLGSA has offered members of our community an opportunity for fun, friendship, and competition. The league offers divisional play for all skill levels from beginner to Travis Hafner. For the first time since 1988, Columbus will be sending teams to the World Series in Seattle, August 25-31. The league requests that all players (including returning players) register in person if possible for the 2008 season. Registering in person will allow us to address your questions regarding the league and refresh our database with your current information. Our goal is to increase individualized communication of important league events and information. Individuals who are interested in playing, but do not have a team are encouraged to register. The league will help match you with a team. Both registration parties are also fundraisers for the league. Fundraisers will include drink specials and a 50/50 raffle. Join your teammates and other players for spring training and a few cocktails. The registration dates are: Sunday, March 16 at Score Bar from 1-4p Watch the Big Ten Tournament Final and NCAA Selection Show. One lucky registrant will win a trip to Las Vegas compliments of Score Bar! Sunday, March 30th at Union from 1-4p - Stick

More than 3016 Ohio cities and villages have ordinances that protect gay and lesbian residents and two of them – Toledo and Cincinnati – include transgender people. Summit and Cuyahoga counties have equal job protections for their public employees. Gov. Ted Strickland has signed an executive order protecting state employees from discrimination based on sexual orientation or gender identity in employment decisions. His order restores protections ended eight years before by his predecessor, Bob Taft. As Gov. Strickland succinctly stated, such discrimination “offends basic notions of human dignity.’’ But if you are a member of Ohio’s LGBT community, the extent of your legal rights depends entirely on your zip code. Some members of our community have full protections; others can be fired and denied housing, employment or public accommodations – simply because of their sexual orientation or gender identity. Ohio’s absence of a statewide law helps ranks us at the bottom of legal rights for members of our community. We are tied for last place, joining Mississippi, Nebraska, Wyoming, South Carolina and , North Dakota and South Dakota. Our low ranking has endured, despite new polling that shows two out every three Ohio voters support laws that would place our state among the nation’s most progressive. Ohio’s laws have not kept pace with Ohioan’s values. It’s time to change our laws. State Sen. Dale Miller, a Cleveland Democrat, and state Representatives. Jon Peterson, a Delaware Republican, and Dan Stewart, a Columbus Democrat, have introduced identical bills that would make it illegal to discriminate against a person in employment, housing or public accommodations because of their sexual orientation or gender identity. We have won introduction of similar measures in the past but few lawmakers signed on as co-sponsors and the bills received not a single hearing. This time, things are different. around for Showtunes! For additional information, please contact the league at info@clgsa.net.

COLUMBUS JEWISH FILM FESTIVAL RESCHEDULES OPENING NIGHT FESTIVITIES Due to the inclement weather that occurred on the Opening Night of the Columbus Jewish Film Festival, the festivities previously scheduled for March 8 will now take place on Sunday, March 16, at the Gateway Theater, 1550 N High St. The event will begin at 4p with the showing of My Mexican Shivah, followed by a reception at 5:30p in The Event Place at the Gateway. The festival will close with the film, The Bubble, at 6:45p. For more information, visit the film festival website at www.cjfilmfest.org or call 614.231.2731.

WEXNER CENTER RESCHEDULES CANCELED OUT@WEX FILMS The three films that were postponed this past Saturday will be shown on the afternoon of Sunday, March 30. Bill Jones-related programming will likely take place in August. They will honor tickets that were purchased for Saturday, March 8.

The new legislation has attracted a record number of co-sponsors, the promise of committee hearings, the endorsement of a popular governor and strong support from some of Ohio’s leading corporate citizens. But if we wish to truly improve our state and enhance our liberties, we must move beyond our shortterm efforts toand launch a long-term endeavor that reverse policies imposed by today’s conservative leaders and expand efforts to builds momentum for wholesale change. To achieve equality, we must abandon our timidity. We must call on our allies to join with us to help educate our adversaries and hold accountable, and even embarrass, those who work against our full citizenship our enemies. Discrimination should have consequences. We are not asking for something odd, or something evil. Our request does not conflict with our nation’s constitution. We are simply asking that a free society view all people as equal in the eyes of the law and we are reminding our citizenry that every religion has its own version of the Golden Rule. You can help. Contact Rep. Peterson, Rep. Stewart or Sen. Miller to thank them for their efforts. Contact your state senator or your state representative to ask for their support. If they are opposed to the bill or even ambivalent toward it, make an appointment to make your case. If they say are too busy for a meeting, call back the following week. This must be a long- term effort to effect change. Write a letter to your local newspaper. Call in to a talk radio show. Join the chorus of support for our efforts by blogging at www.progressohio.org. Urge your friends, family members, co-workers and neighbors to join our cause. Together, we can make Ohio a place where everyone feels at home. Lynne Bowman Executive Director Equality Ohio

Here is the Sunday schedule: 1p: BEFORE I FORGET 3p: LAGERFELD CONFIDENTIAL 5p: ITTY BITTY TITTY COMMITTEE CALL FOR DOCUMENTARIES - PUBLIC TV’S GAY AND LESBIAN SERIES IS LOOKING FOR DOCUMENTARY CONTENT TO ACQUIRE. IN THE LIFE has a 16-year heritage of producing powerful stories about the people and issues shaping the gay experience, nationally and abroad. Now we are looking to the independent producing community to help expand and diversify our programming. In The Life Media, Inc. is now seeking documentaries about the LGBTQ experience for our 2008 and 2009 season. We will consider non-fiction films of all lengths created by independent producers or entities in the past five years for acquisition. Preference will be given to broadcast premieres. This is a rare opportunity for producers who have either evergreen docs that could be repurposed and given a 2nd or 3rd broadcast window, or unused stories from past projects. For submission guidelines and more information go to http://www.inthelifetv.org. Submission deadline is open.


OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 7

MAR 13 - MAR 19 2008


8 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

CITIZEN CRAIN by Chris Crain

An election without scapegoats? With Bush and Rove finally gone, will Americans get an election focused on the issues and the candidates and not divisive wedges among them? On the night that Barack Obama won the Wisconsin primary, he reminded a nationally televised rally in Houston that the largely respectful intraparty contests so far this year will be followed by what could be a much more divisive general election. “I know how easy it is for politicians to turn us on each other,” he said, “to use immigrants or gay people or folks who aren’t like us as scapegoats for what they do.” Who can disagree, after George Bush and Karl Rove used the specter of gay marriage so effectively to turn out evangelical voters in November 2004? But Bush isn’t on the ballot this time, and Karl Rove has been reduced to writing opinion columns (yikes!), so should we really expect more scapegoating this time around? Thankfully, Republican primary voters did what they could to reduce those odds, rejecting the xenophobic candidacies of Tom Tancredo and Mitt Romney, and turned away the stridently anti-gay rhetoric of Mike Huckabee (and MAR 13 - MAR 19 2008

Mitt Romney). There’s plenty not to like about GOP nominee John McCain – including his opposition to every form of gay rights protection and any form of legal representation for same-sex couples – but his candidacy doesn’t offer the opportunities to wedge the public like the man now occupying the Oval Office did. We remember all too well how Bush used the federal marriage amendment to suggest John Kerry was weak on gay marriage. But McCain is actually opposed to that amendment and in fact has said it is antithetical to the core philosophy of Republicans (federalism, not tolerance or equality). As Obama reminded his audience, undocumented immigrants have emerged in recent years as another favorite political scapegoat, blamed by the likes of CNN’s Lou Dobbs for all sorts of social and economic ills. But on this score as well, McCain is the wrong candidate to take advantage, since he led the failed effort at comprehensive immigration reform, including a path to citizenship for those already here. Other scapegoats could emerge, of course. George H.W. Bush used furloughed murderer Willie Horton to play on racial divisions back in 1988. But the Republicans know better than to try that if Obama is the nominee, and are already spreading the word internally that “undisciplined messaging” – insensitive racial rhetoric – carries a much greater risk of

backfiring than helping. If Hillary Clinton wins the nomination, conservatives won’t need to create a scapegoat – it will be her. But as the odds against her winning still might not be in her favor, it appears even the Clinton haters and misogynists won’t have Hillary to kick around anymore. There are still other ways for wedge politics to rear its ugly head. Conservatives in Florida have already put a marriage ban amendment on the November ballot there, the same tactic Rove and the Republicans used successfully in Ohio and a number of other states back in 2004. And even if the McCain campaign steers clear of gays and Hispanics, that doesn’t mean other candidates and independent groups won’t go there. Conservatives running for Congress and state-level offices can waive the bloody shirt, and the result would be the same when the voters who respond pull the lever in the presidential race. It will be up to groups like the Log Cabin Republicans to pressure McCain to speak out against wedge politics where it is practiced, even if it may cynically benefit him. The Vietnam war hero is unusual among conservatives in that he might just respond favorably, making clear that appeals to the fear and hatred toward fellow Americans have no place in politics. Of course McCain’s goodwill curbs markedly once you reach America’s shores, and he’s

shown time and again the same willingness that George Bush has to demonize those who challenge America abroad. And that’s where the scapegoating and fear-mongering is most likely in this general election. McCain talks frequently and excitedly about Muslim extremists hellbent on our destruction, and no doubt will contrast Obama’s relative inexperience on national security and foreign policy to stoke fears about making the Democrat commander in chief. We’ve already seen this primary season how Internet rumors have suggested Obama has an Islamic past or refuses to put his hand over his heart during the Pledge of Allegiance. Both lies. This week, closeted pseudo-journalist Matt Drudge posted photos of Obama wearing traditional African garb on a trip to Kenya, and we can expect more of that, to be sure. But it’s still small potatoes to the fear-mongering of gays in 2002 and 2004, and the scapegoating of Hispanics we’ve seen more recently. If those running for the nation’s highest office can keep things clean, maybe it will trickle down to the rest of the electorate as well. Chris Crain is former editor of the Washington Blade and five other gay publications and now edits GayNewsWatch.com. He can be reached via his blog at www.citizencrain.com.


OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 9

MAR 13 - MAR 19 2008


10 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

MAR 13 - MAR 19 2008


OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 11

STRAIGHT UP by Adam Lippe

“I don’t get this whole ‘camp’ thing. Why can’t gay guys take things seriously?” A socially progressive, but direct friend, once said this and it initially puzzled me. I grew up in gay culture, had a gay parent, spent my childhood summers on a gay island, went to a gay college, met my girlfriend at a gay bar, and joined gay groups, and yet this issue had never occurred to me. In my experience, gay men had to struggle to gain initial acceptance as being more than just a disease and then slowly became more than the sexless fop best friend in the mainstream movie. Derided as silly and promiscuous by mainstream society, I would assume the tag of being taken seriously would be high up on the agenda. But then my assumption is based on my straight set of values, and high up on my priority list would be people valuing what I say or write for its content, not because of what I am. Marking progression in gay culture’s acceptance in the mainstream is easier for me on the outside of gay culture, because it can be done with bullet points, instead of anecdotally. I think back on a review I read many years ago in Entertainment Weekly about the perfectly enjoyable, but non-too-revolutionary lesbian romantic comedy, The Incredibly True Adventures of 2 Girls in Love, which basically said that if a movie as generic as this can be made, then perhaps it is a stepping stone for all gay culture. I agreed. Once the issue isn’t that the characters are gay - but that they are boring, middlebrow people in the midst of a clichéd romance - then clearly homosexuals have become just like everyone else, and not just a niche group striving for equality. This is comparable to the assimilation of black culture within mainstream culture. This

was evident in the late 90’s series of Buppie dramas, with films like The Best Man, The Wood, etc. So while there are always going to points of regression (in black culture those points would be the bewildering success with the minstrelsy of the Tyler Perry films/plays/TV show and Eddie Murphy’s recent Norbit), you would think that since it has been 13 years since The Incredibly True Adventures of 2 Girls in Love was released to theaters, and since we’re past the “gays are self-hating and constantly miserable and have sex with anything that moves until they eventually kill themselves” perception from the 1960’s, that gays would have advanced past embracing the whole camp element with which they were most notoriously associated for years. This was one of the very reasons I joined a gay young professionals group here in Columbus. While my girlfriend and I might have been the sole straight people in attendance, the ad did say they were looking for “allies,” and both of us were interested in forwarding the cause as much as we could. I feel that the more seriously gay men and women are taken, the easier it will be to pass important issues like gay marriage. While I wasn’t so concerned with fitting in in the group in the normal sense, I was surprised by the number of self-proclaimed professionals who turned out for a group that had accidentally been advertised in a local publication as “Young and Hung.” When the introductions were made, I didn’t expect so many doctors, lawyers, accountants, and other such legitimate occupations; why would they show their faces for something dubbed “Young and Hung?” I was beginning to feel a throwback coming on, to the Boys in the Band era. Well, I

suppose if you work long hours in important positions, it is hard to meet new people. But maybe they were there for more laudable reasons… As we went to more meetings, attendance thoroughly dwindled, one can only assume because either people weren’t serious or focused enough, or they weren’t young and hung enough. It didn’t matter to me why there were fewer people there, I just wanted to help. That was why I decided to take a more active approach and not just listen. So as the young professionals group went through the week’s agenda, I noticed an item that piqued my interest, but probably not for the reasons intended. The group was aligning itself with another gay group who would be screening The Rocky Horror Picture Show. That struck me as a misstep. Why, if you wish to be taken seriously and be thought of as professional, would want to be associated with a film which has crossed over into mainstream culture in a way that denigrates the perception of gays, seeing them as foofy crossdressers who like musicals? How would that be the proper road to equality and acceptance? When I spoke up, I was treated like an ignorant boob, this particular group would support other gay groups, no matter the reason. Alliance apparently trumps common sense. The reaction of other members was to glare and snarl at me, as if I were suggesting a rainbow flag burning in the town hall. And not two minutes after I made my suggestion, one of the group leaders made his authoritarian presence known. “I know this may sound like a silly way to network, but what about if we tried speed dating?”

During the next few meetings, we were completely ostracized and ignored. Apparently, we were only useful as tokens - not as people who actually had anything to say. So was dating really the point all along? Was it all about meeting new people to bed, under the guise of being a professional? Is it perhaps that gay men, underneath it all, don’t really want to be taken seriously, and the notion of social progression is a pose put on by uptight queens who can’t get laid? What is the real face of gay men, not just the smiling lobbyist in a suit? As questions swam in my mind, I overheard a conversation in a local restaurant recently, where a way over-the-top mincing, flailing gay cashier was debating the importance of gay rights to a customer who believed that women had it far worse off. Is he the representative who the straight public sees? I don’t have a problem with him or his attitude, though he tends toward the stereotype, but is that allnatural behavior for him or is it an affect? He must be aware he has sort of a campy nature, and it makes anything he has to say hard to take seriously. So one has to wonder if it is entirely on purpose to fulfill his expected niche, or that is natural for him. If we can all agree that being gay is not a choice, then is part of this inherent self-mocking silliness part of a gay man’s genes, passed down? Is camp a side effect of being gay? What bleeds through this issue is whether it is possible for campy gays to be respected as people with real thoughts, as opposed to just cartoonish figures ready and willing to be your local tongue-clicking hairdresser. And is it necessary to choose between the preening queen and the serious suit? MAR 13 - MAR 19 2008


12 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

MAR 13 - MAR 19 2008


OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 13

GENERAL GAYETY by Leslie Robinson

THE ROYAL TREATMENT The most prominent person due to attend a Dutch gay rights conference is a future queen, and I don’t mean a teenager with a tendency toward the fabulous. A spokesman for the Dutch royal family confirmed that Princess Maxima, the wife of Holland’s Crown Prince Willem-Alexander, will participate in the conference in early March. That ought to boost coverage. And attendance. And the sartorial efforts of participants, who could find themselves in many a background shot. We Americans know a lot about the British royals. We know about Monaco’s royal family, since American actress Grace Kelly gave birth to the present crop. But we don’t know much about the rest of Europe’s royalty. The continent is knee-deep with nobles, from Spain to Sweden to Serbia. Europeans monitor the doings of their royals. I remember as a child visiting my German grandmother, who would have a stack of women’s magazines with smiling royal mugs on the cover. My grandmother fretted over whichever royal was currently misbehaving. I found the magazines interesting - but not as compelling as reading about America’s royals, the denizens of the Kingdom of Hollywood. I knew who Robert Redford was; I didn’t know who Prince Hubert of Lombardy-Alpenschnickl

was, even though he stood 63rd in line to the throne of Albania. But I royally digress. Underscoring the importance of royalty in Holland, Frank Van Dalen of the Dutch Gay Federation expressed glee at snagging the princess for the conference. “This will be a historically significant royal presence,” he said. “This is what we have been hoping for for a very long time.” My hope is that all goes well at the conference, and the princess doesn’t fall in love with a commoner. A lesbian commoner at that. Van Dalen said, “It is the first time a member of the royal family has attended a meeting with such significance for gays.” Princess Maxima picked a good first time. Holland cemented its reputation as one of the most tolerant countries when in 2001 it became the first nation in the world to grant same-sex marriage. The city of Amsterdam is a gay mecca. But Amsterdam police report that in recent years violent crimes against gays have ballooned. Pinknews.com noted that in a survey last August half of Dutch gays said they felt less safe than the year before. The Netherlands’ reputation for open-mindedness is getting sliced like Gouda. It’s time to put the Dutch royal seal of approval on tolerance.

Queen Beatrix has spoken out on behalf of gay rights in the past. Now Princess Maxima will ratchet support up a notch with this personal appearance. The royals have taken heat for their pro-gay positions from some right-wing politicians and conservative Protestants, as well as Muslims, a growing population in Holland. A monarch’s lot is not an easy one. Good thing the perks like wealth - help cushion the blow. A palace spokesman said, “The princess is in favor of equal rights of all groups in the Netherlands.” Presumably that includes Muslims, so it will be interesting to watch how Holland and its future queen - who is actually from Argentina - navigate these tricky canals in the years ahead. The gay rights conference at hand will be held in four major cities, Amsterdam, Rotterdam, The Hague and Utrecht. The focus will be gays’ continued exclusion from Dutch society and what to do about it. At the conclusion, Princess Maxima will sign an accord calling for the full acceptance of homosexuals in Holland. I’m sure she won’t be the only one signing it. But with her star power, who’s going to notice the others?

When Leslie Robinson is in line to the throne, it means she’s waiting for the bathroom. E-mail her at LesRobinsn@aol.com,and read other columns at www.GeneralGayety.com.

TRANSNATION by Jacob Anderson-Minshall

Trans Presidential Candidate Conservative Ben “Bennie Lee” Ferguson is running for president. “To the best of my knowledge,” the self-described bisexual cross dresser brags, “I’m the first openly transgendered U.S. presidential candidate ever to register with the Federal Election Commission.” Ferguson hopes the publicity around her presidential candidacy will, come November, translate into a win - in her other race. The Independent write-in candidate for president is also an official Libertarian candidate for the Kansas House of Representatives - a position for which she received 22 percent of the votes when she ran in 2006. “There’s a method to my madness,” Ferguson insists. “I expect publicity from the two concurrent campaigns to bleed over into each other.” There are serious components to her presidential candidacy, Ferguson contends, including combating stereotypes about trans people, especially “the assumption that all transgendered people march in lockstep with the GLBT establishment. My right-of-center positions should serve to foster greater tolerance for the transgendered community.”

Ferguson (ferg.politicalgateway.com) says her core constituency is the 30,000 members of Trannyweb.com, who have been, “Unstinting and lavish in their support. While my transgendered status certainly doesn’t completely define me as a candidate, it’s nevertheless a basic component of my campaign.” In fact, she’s primarily campaigning to the queer community. “It’s a foregone conclusion that Kansas will go Republican in the 2008 presidential contest. Given the demographics, GLBT votes cast for the Democratic candidate…would be truly wasted. If I, as an openly transgendered candidate, receive any sizable amount of votes it will…attract media attention. The resulting publicity will benefit the Kansas GLBT community - and highlight its political clout. One need not necessarily win elections in order to wield influence.” The former Log Cabin Republican maintains an affinity for the Republican Party but says she feels “more influential as a Libertarian. I switched party affiliation formally when I was asked by the Kansas Libertarian organization to run for…a Kansas House race several years ago.”

Immersed in the cross dresser community for over two decades, Ferguson maintains that trans people offer unique perspectives that challenge traditional dichotomous notions, which have polarized societies throughout history. She calls herself a gender chameleon and says she’s equally comfortable in both her feminine and masculine personas. “[I] am loathe to abandon either…My lifestyle is a truly transgendered one in that I don’t totally identify with traditional concepts concerning either gender. Being a cross dresser does not define me. It’s only a part of who and what I am.” Huge schisms, Ferguson asserts, exist between elements of the LGBT community and within the trans community itself. “Even the definition of what constitutes transgenderism is hotly debated. Cross dressers, in particular, are often frowned upon. Some transsexuals…look askance at cross dressers, considering them posers, and hobbyists and not truly transgendered..” Some of Ferguson’s political positions are rather contentious. For example, she insists that “It’s not possible to legislate individual

attitudes, in regard to hate or any other emotion. Hate crimes legislation is divisive in that it creates special classes of crimes tailored to certain segments of the population and detracts from the notion of equality under the law. Violence between various communities can only be permanently reduced through communication and understanding, not legislation.” Declaring that the fundamental challenge of our time is striking a balance between civil liberties and national security, Ferguson supports the occupation of Iraq. “Our government and the American people should do whatever is necessary to support our troops in the field. Victory does not look like precipitous, premature withdrawal from Iraq before any semblance of security and stability is established.” Jacob Anderson-Minshall co-authors the Blind Eye mystery series, including Blind Curves and Blind Leap. Learn more at Anderson-minshall.com or contact him at jake@trans-nation.org. © 2008 Jacob AndersonMinshall

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14 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

MAR 13 - MAR 19 2008


OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 15

PET TALK by Dean Vickers

Coping with the Loss of a Pet “I wish I was half the person my dog thinks I am.” I have heard it said time and again that you cannot choose your family; you can only choose your friends. Although I disagree with this as a general rule; I do not believe that blood alone makes a family, the sentiment is accurate. With that notion, however, where does that leave pets? Those of us who have pets know the important place they occupy in our lives and in our hearts. In fact, over 80% of American pet owners consider their pets to be members of their family; I would fall into that statistic. Pets have the incredible ability to know when to leave you alone and when, despite your protests, you need to be loved. They know instinctively when you need someone close to you who does not judge you, but only wants to comfort you. It is an incredible and wondrous journey when we commit to the responsibility of bringing a pet into our lives. We commit to, and provide a loving, safe and healthy environment that we share with our family, friends and pets. To me, as with many others, pets are more then mere animals. They are companions who come into our lives for various reasons and for various lengths of time. To a degree, pets help fill a void in our ever demanding life. They serve as a source of unconditional love, in an often harsh world. They listen to our stories and do not pass judgment, they accept us for who we are, and overlook our flaws and imperfections. And, they also forgive us without question. Regardless of my hectic schedule, or what piece of legislation, which disaster or animal fighting raid I am working on, as soon as I open my front door, I am greeted by wagging tails and barks of joy. They forgive the missed walks, the missed belly scratches and hugs in the morning and they forgive the missed play time; they are just excited to see me, and it feels good to be home. For the past eighteen years, I was fortunate to

share my life with a wonderful Pomeranian named Rowdy. Her brother, Hootie, died the previous year at seventeen years of age. Throughout the years, we went on hikes to the dog park or just on long walks in the neighborhood. I took them camping and even vacationed with them. I bought them holiday gifts and I donated in their name. But every memory generated designates the passing of time. Although grateful for the time we shared, I felt helpless as I watched their vision fade and the pace of their walk slow. I agonized as I watched the bad days out number the good days. I could not imagine another summer walk, autumn leaves or the blanket of winter snow without them, but I could also not imagine allowing them suffer in pain. Making the decision to put them down was not easy. Those of you who have made this decision know the pain. It doesn’t matter that it was the right thing to do; it doesn’t make the loss any less painful. When a person you love dies, it is natural to feel sorrow, express grief, and expect friends and family to provide understanding and support. Unfortunately, the same doesn’t always hold true when the loss you are grieving is of a companion animal. Many people do not respect the closeness and compassion we share with our pets. They reduce the loss, in my case, of an eighteen-year relationship to the death of ‘just a pet.’ Nothing could be further from the truth. We love our pets and they are, indeed, a part of our family. Given the amount of emotional support and unconditional love you have shared, it is not unusual to feel overwhelmed by the intensity of sorrow when your pet dies. That you already accept and appreciate the bond between humans and animals indicates that you have already taken the first step toward coping with pet loss: knowing that it is okay to grieve for your pet. The grief process is as individual as the person, lasting for days for one person or years for another.

Understanding how you grieve and finding ways to cope with your loss can bring you closer to the day when memories bring smiles instead of tears. While grief is a personal experience, you do not need to face it alone. Many forms of support are available, including bereavement counseling, pet loss support groups and hot lines, books and videos. Here are a couple suggestions the may help you cope: 1.Acknowledge your grief and give yourself permission to express it. 2. Don’t hesitate to reach out to others who can lend a sympathetic ear. 3. Write about your feelings 4. Contact your local humane society or religious affiliation to see if they offer a pet loss support group. 5. Explore the Internet for pet loss support or chat rooms. 6. Prepare a memorial for your pet. One of the most difficult dilemmas involves when the appropriate time to get a new pet is. I would encourage you to wait a few months, or longer, before bringing a new pet into your life. It was a little different for me, even after Rowdy’s death in November 2008; I still had two wonderful dogs, J’Maul and Annikka. So I did not walk into an empty home. I understand that it is tempting to fill the void of one pet’s passing with another pet. But, as you know, they are not interchangeable. It is best to mourn the loss of your old companion so that when you do bring a new pet home, you are able to appreciate your new best friend as an individual personality and not as a replacement. Follow your

instincts; you will know when it is right to bring a new pet into your life. Pets are unique; we allow them into some of the most guarded parts of our private lives. They last longer than many relationships and jobs. Because of this loyalty, we allow them to reach deeper into our lives than we allow any human. And although we know that all too soon we will need to say goodbye, we willingly share with them what we give to very few others: unconditional love, faith, loyalty and respect. To this end, we must protect their memories and learn from how they have touched our lives. The best way I can honor the lives of Hootie and Rowdy, as well as all the thousands of dogs that die everyday in shelters waiting to find a person who will love them, is to be the person my dog thinks I am. Although I know I may fall short, I also know I am a better person for having tried. This I learned from my dogs. Dean Vickers is the Ohio State Director for the Humane Society of the United States. He can be reached at 614-607-7139 or by emailing dvickers@hsus.org.

OHIO HOMELESS PETS GO ONLINE IN RECORD NUMBERS Potential adopters can visit over 550 Ohio animal placement groups on Petfinder.com. Petfinder.com, the largest database of homeless pets on the Web, has announced that over 550 Ohio animal welfare groups are posting their pets on the site. "The number is gratifying," said Betsy Saul, cofounder of Petfinder, "because it means that more homeless pets in Ohio are going to find permanent homes.” Petfinder.com has facilitated over 12 million adoptions since its creation in 1996. Nationwide and beyond, the Web site features over 254,000 homeless pets in over 11,500 animal placement groups. Each pet has its own Pet Notes page with a photo and description. A new feature

allows shelters to post videos of the pets. Visitors to the site enter their search criteria, and a list comes back that is ranked according to the visitors’ Zip code. Adoptions are handled by the organization where the pet is housed. Some people find a pet close to home on Petfinder, but other adopters, who would never have known about a particular animal without the benefit of the Web, go some distance to adopt a pet. Patti Sands, Upper Saddle River, N.J., 16 hours to Cleveland and back to adopt Dolce, a Havanese that was rescued from a puppy mill. "He was worth the trip," she said. "Petfinder is a wonderful re-

source for locating pets who really need caring homes. Amy Fogelman, Cincinnati, has found two dogs, using Petfinder."Our first pick was Digger," she said. "He came from a local rescue when he was a puppy. He has grown to be the 'leader' of our pack. About one year later, we found Guernsey on Petfinder's homepage as a featured pet. Though he was located about three hours away, our hearts melted at the sight of his big brown eyes. We drove three hours to pick up the newest member of our family. Both pups have a special place in our hearts and our home."

The site not only lists cats and dogs, which make up the bulk of the listings, but also horses, reptiles, rabbits, pocket pets, pigs and others. Thanks to its sponsors, using Petfinder.com is free, both to its members and to potential adopters. Sponsors include BISSELL Homecare, Inc., a manufacturer of home cleaning and floor care products, PETCO, a national pet supply retailer that sponsors in-store adoptions and provides coupon books for new adopters, The Animal Rescue Site, and Merial, maker of the number one veterinary-recommended flea and tick preventative FRONTLINE®, and heartworm preventative HEARTGARD®. MAR 13 - MAR 19 2008


16 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

FEATURE STORY

Get Green Columbus — Environmental Stewardship in the 21st Century Green Memo and Green Principles In January 2005, Mayor Michael B. Coleman issued a comprehensive environmental policy statement, “Get Green Columbus, Environmental Stewardship in the 21st Century.” Known as the Green Memo, it sets forth the city’s commitment to making Columbus a greener place to live. In addition, the City has recently adopted a statement of values, known as the Green Principles. As we are upon St Patrick’s day, with thought it fitting to present the City’s Green Summary for 2007 and get you plugged into the Get Green Columbus movement if you aren’t already. The following is an overview of our progress thus far and things you can do to help. Dear Friends; My Get Green Columbus initiative is now three years old, and we have made much progress toward the goals set in 2005. This following outlines some highlights of the work we’ve done together to protect our environment, encourage green jobs and construction, and set a good example for others on this important issue. For a more complete report, please go to www.GetGreenColumbus.org and check out our Progress to Date section. We created the Green Team in 2006 as a part of the campaign, and I want to say a special thanks to the members for their work as advisors and advocates in the community. The Green Team has been particularly effective at communications and outreach, hosting conferences, participating in festivals and generally helping get the green word out. Of all of our accomplishments, one of the most meaningful is also the hardest to quantify – showing how our local efforts compliment the national green movement. But, while we aren’t there yet, every day I’m proud to see new ways that Columbus’ citizens of all ages, students, businesses and others are getting involved and Getting Green. To foster that involvement, this year I am going to launch Get Green Columbus Project GreenSpot. This Project will encourage businesses, schools, churches, and individual citizens to turn their businesses, buildings and homes into “GreenSpots.” GreenSpots will be launched by July – keep an eye on our web page for more information. Together we can make all of CenMAR 13 - MAR 19 2008

tral Ohio a GreenSpot.

Central Ohio Green Pact Mayor Coleman and 11 other central Ohio Mayors Sincerely, joined with MORPC in signing the Central Ohio Green Michael B. Coleman, Mayor Pact, a 10-point common sense approach to creatEncouraging Biking ing a more environmentally sustainable community. 2007 was the year that biking made it onto the This Pact represents an historic, multijurisdictional public agenda in a big way in Columbus. Currently, commitment to Get Green with policies that enhance under our current plan, the City’s existing greenway and protect the quality of life, environment and ecotrail system of 62 miles will be expanded to 110 nomic vibrancy of the region. Together these thirteen miles, but Mayor Coleman is also asking MORPC, jurisdictions to take practical steps to protect the air residents and bike advocates to help the City plan and water, to preserve natural resources, to increase for more bike and fitness trails and paths for the fu- green space, reduce our consumption of raw materiture through the Bicentennial Bikeway Plan. This als and increase recycling. plan, which should be final in the Spring of 2008, Green Pact Signers: Columbus Bexley Dublin Gawill look at not just how the City should grow its trail hanna Grandview Heights Grove City Hilliard MORPC system, but also what other steps the City can take New Albany Powell Upper Arlington Westerville Worto become more bike friendly. Recommendations for thington connecting existing trails and making roads safer will be included. Even before the plan is done, the Building GREEN City continues to expand its network, including a The City continues to LEED the way with green new bridge over the Olentangy River at Broadmead- buildings. The City has six buildings, including two ows Drive, allowing greater east-west connections. fire stations, a police station, a health center, that are in design or construction will be LEED certified, Pedal Instead and another six that are being built with green eleMaking Columbus more bike-friendly is one of our ments, such as energy efficiency, added to their dehighest priorities. Biking is not only great exercise, sign. which contributes to making our city more fit, it also 2007 also saw two of the City’s green projects win can reduce air pollution when people use bikes to national recognition. The downtown Lazarus Buildcommute. In 2007, the City partnered with Central ing was awarded a Gold Level LEED certification Ohio Biking Association to set up free bike corrals at from the U.S. Green Building Council, making seven festivals and three OSU football games to en- Lazarus the largest LEED building in Ohio and courage commuting by bike. The bike corrals were among the largest internationally to achieve LEED very successful. We parked more than 2,300 bikes. certification for the complete renovation of an older By not driving their cars, those bikers saved almost building. The National Association of Industrial and 1000 gallons of gas, and over 18,000 pounds of Office Properties (NAIOP) selected the Lazarus Buildgreenhouse gas emissions. ing for its annual Green Development Award. In addition, Greenview Estates was selected by the Increasing Free Neighborhood Recycling Midwest Energy Efficiency Alliance for its Inspiring In the fall of 2007, Columbus partnered with Energy Efficiency Impact Award. Greenview Estates Columbus Public Schools and SWACO to add 121 is an affordable green subdivision, with energy effinew recycling drop off locations – almost tripling the cient homes that will save residents money for years number of available sites. The drop off program is to come. going well. The amount of recycling in 2007 increased over 2006 by more than 1,100 tons to a Increasing recycling at City Buildings total of 10,756 tons. To find the nearest location to Columbus’ expanded Employee Recycling Proyou, go to www.SWACO.org and enter your zip code. gram includes much more than paper – employees can now co-mingle and recycle paper, plastic, alu-

minum and steel. In 2007, the expanded program resulted in 373 tons of material being recycled, which is a more than 10% increase over 2006. Starting this year, each City building will have a Recycling Steward appointed to every building to further promote the Employee Recycling Program. Protecting Our Climate In February, Mayor Coleman signed the U.S. Mayor’s Climate Protection Agreement. In doing so, Mayor Coleman joined 600 mayors from across the country in making a commitment to reduce the City’s impact on global warming. Once the agreement was signed, the first step for the City was to complete a baseline emission inventory of its greenhouse gas emissions. This baseline was recently completed, and now the City is working on establishing reduction goals and an action plan. The City worked with the Ohio State University to create a new inventory tool that is geared towards municipalities. The City is making it available for free to the rest of the Central Ohio Community, so that other cities may more easily complete a baseline inventory. Green Fleet Policy The City of Columbus has approximately 3,100 on-road and 2,800 off-road vehicles, which consumed approximately 3.6 million gallons of fuel in 2007. As part of Mayor Coleman’s Get Green Columbus initiative, the City is working to reduce vehicle fuel consumption and emissions. The City adopted an update to the City’s Green Fleet Policy, effective January 1, 2008. The goals of the policy are to cut fuel consumption, retire or retrofit pre-2002 diesels, and educate drivers about how to drive smart. Protecting the Big Darby Creek In 2007, Mayor Coleman and other elected officials celebrated the one year anniversary of the Big Darby Accord Masterplan. Six jurisdictions, representing 95% of the planning area, have adopted the plan. Since adopting it, the jurisdictions have been busy implementing the plan, establishing the Big Darby Accord Advisory panel, and starting the planning on the Town Center.


OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 17

JOIN MAYOR COLEMAN’S GET GREEN COLUMBUS CAMPAIGN TOP 10 WAYS YOU CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE!

1. Leave your car at home Bike, walk, take the bus, carpool. Leaving your car at home just two days a week will reduce greenhouse gas emissions by an average of 1,590 pounds per year. Find a bus route at www.cota.com, or van/car/bikepool options at MORPC, 1.888.742.RIDE.

2. Change a light bulb

Replace your regular light bulbs with compact fluorescent light bulbs. A compact fluorescent light bulb will save you $30 in electricity costs over the bulb’s lifetime. If every American home replaced just one light bulb, we would save enough energy to light more than 2.5 mil- lion homes for a year and prevent greenhouse gases equivalent to the emissions of nearly 800,000 cars. Learn more at www.energystar.gov

3. Find the off switch

based on long-term environmental im- Ohio. Partnerships will be joined in pact and operating costs. order to share investment expenses and more broadly reap rewards of sustainable programs. The City of Columbus is committed 5. Promote waste management to achieving an environmentally sus- strategies that seek to reduce, reuse tainable community that meets today’s and recycle. Vastly improve awareness 4. Prioritize long term and cumulative impacts in decision-making on needs without compromising the abil- and participation in recycling programs in the community. Seek opporenvironmental issues. Understand and ity of future generations to meet their needs, and accepts the responsibility tunities to reduce the waste stream of make decisions that promote longto promote these Green Principles in solid waste. Implement programs that term return on investment for the City’s address all forms of waste, including capital spending and general procurepolicy decisions and programs. solid waste, wastewater and organic ment practices, including life-cycle costs. 1. Promote and implement environ- waste. mental quality for current and future 6. Encourage transportation and mo- 5. Distribute the responsibility of engenerations when making decisions vironmental stewardship evenly regarding growth management, trans- bility alternatives that decrease use portation, energy, water, air quality and and dependence on petroleum-based throughout the community, because fuels while improving outdoor air qual- the benefits are distributed evenly. Aseconomic development. ity. Promote energy independence by sure fairness in how this burden is seeking non-petroleum, renewable fuel shared, mindful of economic and so2. Provide for the needs of a growing sources. Support a variety of choices to cial circumstances. population in a manner that enhances prosperity and sustains a di- the community that promote pedestrian access, transit, bikeways and 6. Seek incentive-based strategies to verse, resilient and healthy healthy lifestyles. promote sustainable, green practices environment when establishing policy throughout the business community on land use, infrastructure developThe elected officials and staff of the and general public. Educate and inment, open space preservation, spire adherence to sound environmenhealthy lifestyles, preservation of natu- City of Columbus serve as Environmental Stewards and will promote tal practices. Balance incentive-based ral resources, growing food locally, and these Green Principles in a manner re- with the greening of the city through tree standards-based, regulatory applanting and parks development. Prior- flecting the following Values: proaches. itize the impact of regional conse1. The City leads by example in order quences and opportunities. to achieve environmental gains with 7. Promote the highest quality of life lasting value while serving as a role possible for the citizens of Columbus 3. Strengthen economic vitality and economic security within the commu- model to the private sector and com- in making all environmentally based munity at large. All City departments decisions. nity through environmentally based policies that create jobs, promote en- contribute resources and commit to the stewardship role. 8. Measure results in achieving envitrepreneurship, and expand green ronmental quality, and report outbusiness opportunities. Promote prodcomes to the community annually. ucts and services that enhance envi- 2. Awareness, education and environmental, social and economic vigor ronmental literacy are essential components of all implementation plans For more info on the Get Green Iniby adopting and implementing sustainable procurement practices. Utilize related to sustainable strategies. The tiative see: www.getgreencolumbus.org research & development as a vital tool City is committed to engaging the in promoting green economic develop- community, including non-native English speaking groups, in raising literment, seeking advancements and acy regarding solutions to these break-through technologies. environmental, economic and social challenges. 4. Reduce demand for natural resources through energy efficiency, 3. Collaboration with allied organizawater conservation and sustainable tions, including surrounding commuland use. Promote construction of nities, will be sought to leverage high-performance, green buildings positive initiatives further into central

Mayor’s Green Team: Green Principles

Leaving appliances in standby mode wastes significant amounts of energy. Turn off appliances, such as computers, printers, stereo, televisions, and DVD players when not in use. Use a power strip/surge protector so you can completely power down. Learn more at www. energystar.gov

4. Drive Smart Don’t idle your engine unnecessarily, and don’t make jack rabbit starts. Make sure your car is properly maintained, and the tires are properly inflated. Slow down – going 60 miles per hour instead of 70 saves 4 miles per gallon.

5. Reduce, reuse, recycle Reduce the amount of garbage you generate by looking for products that have less packaging. Buy recycled products. Reuse goods you don’t need by donating them. Learn more at www. WasteNotCenter.org. Recycle everything you can. Find out more at www.RecycleColumbus.org or www.swaco.org.

6. Paper or plastic? Neither! Take your own reusable bags to the grocery store and avoid having to choose between the lesser of these two evils.

7. Plant a tree

Trees absorb carbon dioxide – as much as a ton over the lifetime of the tree. Trees also provide shade, which can reduce heating bills.

8. Don’t wash your car in your driveway The soap goes into the street, then into storm sewers and then into our waterways. Use a commercial car wash, or a gravel or grass area that will keep the wash water contained. Learn more about keeping our waterways clean at Columbus’ We All Live Downstream website, www.utilities.columbus.gov.

9. Keep your house not too hot, not too cold The energy used in an average home can be responsible for more twice the greenhouse gas emissions of an average car, and half of an average family’s utility bill pays for heating and cooling. Adjust your thermostat 2 degrees year round and save as much as 2000 pounds of carbon dioxide emissions. Cut your utility bills by up to 40 percent by purchasing energy-efficient home products that display the federal government’s Energy Star label. www.energystar.gov

10. Safely dispose of household hazardous waste Many common chemicals you may have in your house, such as pesticides, solvents, rat poison, anti-freeze and so forth, can pose hazards to people, pets and the environment if they are not disposed of properly. SWACO offers free periodic house- hold hazardous waste disposal. Find the dates at www.swaco.org. MAR 13 - MAR 19 2008


18 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

FEATURE STORY

Columbus Green News MAYOR SETS GOALS FOR “GREENER” CITY FLEET While Mayor Michael B. Coleman is planning for the 2008 operations and construction seasons, he is also setting green goals for City Departments and finding more ways to make the City’s almost 6,000 vehicle fleet greener in the new year. “We started Get Green Columbus in January 2005 and continue to implement green ideas into our operations and construction plans – with the goals of protecting the environment and cutting our fuel costs,” said Mayor Coleman. “We’re leading by example on not only a greener fleet, but also green buildings, more recycling and other strategies to reduce Columbus’ impact on the environment.” The City of Columbus has approximately 3,100 on-road and 2,800 off-road vehicles, which consumed approximately 3.6 million gallons of fuel in 2007, and were responsible for more than 1,100 tons of greenhouse gas emissions. As part of Mayor Coleman’s Get Green Columbus initiative, the City is working to reduce vehicle fuel consumption and emissions. This week, the Mayor released an update to the City’s Green Fleet Policy, going into effect on January 1, 2008. The goals of the policy are: • Cut Fuel Consumption: Reducing overall fuel use 3% by 2010, and reducing petroleum use by 12% by 2010. The city plans to meet these goals by reducing the amount of miles driven by City employees, reducing idling, buying vehicles that get better gas mileage and using 100% biodiesel by the end of 2008; • Get Rid of Dirty Diesels: Diesel engines manufactured before 2002 are much dirtier than newer engines. The City is setting a goal of retiring and/or retrofitting all eligible pre-2002 diesels by 2012; • Buy Greener Vehicles: By 2010, 100% of the new light duty vehicles that the City buys will be green, and by the end of 2008, most new off-road equipment should be non-petroleum powered if such an option is viable; • Teach Green Driving Skills: To increase the effectiveness of this policy and the already adopted Anti-Idling policy, the City will create a green driver education course, and train all employees on it by 2009.

RECYCLING RECORDS SET SWACO is reporting record amounts of material recycled at its 190 drop off recycling locations throughout Columbus and Franklin County. For all of 2007, 10,756 tons of bottles, cans, paper and cardboard have been recycled. That is over 1,100 tons better than 2006. Also, the December totals are over 200 tons better in a year-to-year comparison. SWACO Executive Director Ron Mills credits the people of Greater Columbus. “It is clear our citizens want to do what is best for our community. We have explained to them that recycling helps the environment, can save tax dollars, and is convenient. They have responded by recycling in record amounts.” To handle the volume created by the community’s response SWACO has increased pick up schedules. In addition some sites are now seeing daily collecMAR 13 - MAR 19 2008

tion on the part of SWACO drivers. Director Mills adds, “We hope people will continue to increase what they recycle. In turn we will respond with the quality service the community has come to expect from SWACO.” SWACO recently added 121 new recycling locations at most Columbus City Schools in cooperation with The City of Columbus and The Columbus City School District. Residents can drop of their recyclables at City School locations between 5p & 9p Monday-Friday, and between 9a & 6p on weekends. Other SWACO drop off recycling locations are available at anytime. For a complete list of what is recyclable and the closest SWACO recycling location, residents can log on to www.swaco.org.

CITY AND RUMPKE TO CONTINUE CURBSIDE RECYCLING AND YARD WASTE COLLECTION RUMPKE of Ohio will continue to offer fee-based curbside recycling to Columbus residents and continue offering free curbside collection of yard waste, which is also recycled, under the terms of legislation passed unanimously by City Council on February 25. As proposed by Mayor Michael B. Coleman, the City will no longer directly subsidize families who subscribe to curbside household recycling, saving $389,311, the equivalent of the 2008 funding for 11 Police recruits in the class scheduled for July. “We appreciate RUMPKE’s commitment to Columbus’ recycling market and that they will keep serving their subscribers with the option of curbside service,” Mayor Coleman said. “Despite tough economic times, we are increasing recycling at homes, businesses and construction sites, as well as through drop boxes. Everyone needs to do more to Get Green and to quit throwing away recyclable materials and yard waste.” RUMPKE will increase the monthly household subscription fee to $8.25, effective June 1 for existing clients and immediately for new subscribers, to off-set its hauling costs. “RUMPKE believes in the importance of offering the curbside recycling program in Columbus, but we also understand fluctuations occur within the economy,” said Andrew Rumpke, RUMPKE vice president. “We hope our customers will continue to show their commitment to a cleaner environment by staying with the program.” Ordinance #0203-2008 modified the City’s 5year contract with RUMPKE, authorizing $3,800,650.00 to fund the continuation of Yard Waste Collection. The amount of trash being recycled by Columbus families is growing at a record pace. In January, three months after expanding the number of dropoff locations from 69 to 190, the Solid Waste Authority of Central Ohio (SWACO) announced that recycling was up 11.5% in 2007 over 2006. RUMPKE reported a 15% increase during the same period in the amount of bottles, cans, paper and cardboard recycled by its curbside customers. Mayor Coleman’s staff is also working on a com-

prehensive review of recycling options, funded in partnership with SWACO, to study into the most economically and environmentally friendly recycling options for Columbus’ future.

SWACO & RASTRA BREAK GROUND ON GREEN MANUFACTURING Central Ohio can soon build green with local products. SWACO and RASTRA have broken ground on an $8.3-million facility at 2500 Jackson Pike which will produce RASTRA products. RASTRA is an insulated foam construction system that provides a permanent framework for a reinforced concrete grid which forms load-bearing walls and other components of a building. It is manufactured by grinding polystyrene (Styrofoam) and mixing it with cement. SWACO Interim Executive Director Ron Mills hails the product as one with multiple advantages to Greater Columbus. “Central Ohio builders will soon have a local green alternative to traditional building methods, one that provides stability, strength, and energy savings. This is a prime example of how SWACO acts as a catalyst in Central Ohio to spur public/private projects of reduce, reuse and recycle. It is also brings benefits to taxpayers as RASTRA’s use of polystyrene will save space at SWACO’s Franklin County landfill.” Currently, polystyrene makes up about six per cent (6%) of what is sent to the landfill (annually 87,000 cubic yards by volume). Mills adds, “We can find new uses for what was once considered waste, and at the same time help build for the future.” This $8.3-million project is expected to bring create 47 jobs within 3 to 4 years. The project is funded in part by a $2-million loan from the Ohio Department of Development. “Demand for green energy alternatives is growing fast and Ohio is perfectly positioned to supply the ideas, the equipment, the processes the world needs - if we invest in our advanced energy future,” says Lieutenant Governor Lee Fisher, who also serves as Director of the Ohio Department of Development. “SWACO and RASTRA are taking the lead in green manufacturing and helping to advance the State by decreasing the reliance on our landfills while creating an environmentally friendly construction material that reduces energy costs. Columbus Mayor Michael Coleman is pleased to welcome the future jobs at RASTRA to the City. “Recycling Styrofoam is a great way to save landfill space and to conserve raw materials. We look forward to working with SWACO and RASTRA to make this a successful venture.” RASTRA will be supported by a City of Columbus Jobs Creation Tax Credit of 65% for a period of 8 years in consideration of the company’s investment of $3.9 million in new personal property and the creation of new jobs “This is more than bringing good jobs to Columbus,” says Charleta B. Tavares, Chair of the City Council Workforce Development Committee. “What we are celebrating today is that we can recruit a new business, improve our environment, recycle and extend the life of our landfill which will make a positive impact on Columbus for decades to

come.” RASTRA President Karl Holik is excited about the expansion of his Scottsdale, Arizona based company. “RASTRA is well established in the western part United States. Our Columbus facility will be an important step to bring the benefits of the Rastra system to the rest of our country. This new location will enable RASTRA to reach a high percentage of the U.S. population with lower transportation costs.” We believe once builders become aware of the energy saving benefits and ease of construction of the RASTRA system, our Columbus location will become a magnet for green builders.” Franklin County Commissioner Marilyn Brown adds, “The expansion of RASTRA in Franklin County will serve as a springboard for future environmentally friendly investments. The company’s efforts to recycle Styrofoam from our county’s landfill will protect our environment while creating innovative products and new jobs, which will spur economic growth.” “This is not about the color green; it’s about a new way of living,” says Franklin County Commissioner Paula Brooks “I was very pleased to serve on the SWACO board last year when the state announced their support for this “green” business.” It’s not just about keeping waste out of the landfill, but recycling otherwise wasted Styrofoam into a useful product of which Franklin County will be proud, while providing good “green collar” jobs for our future.” RASTRA’s Columbus facility will produce about 3,500 square feet of wall per shift, which is enough material to construct a mid size house. After a short start up period there will be two shifts. The production will use in excess of one-million cubic feet of post consumer and post industrial polystyrene waste. SWACO and RASTRA have a long working relationship that started with the construction of “My House” at the Columbus Zoo and Aquarium. In 2000, students from 63 schools across Franklin County collected their polystyrene lunch trays for recycling to help make the RASTA building panels for “My House.” SWACO is the Solid Waste Authority of Central Ohio. We believe today’s throwaways are the foundation for tomorrow. In doing so, we act as a catalyst to bring “Smart Solutions for reducing waste to Central Ohio. SWACO also provides consumers recycling opportunities around Franklin County (Ohio) through 190 recycling drop off-locations, at major sporting and entertainment venues, in Columbus City Schools, and other locations. We also operate the Franklin County Landfill, three transfer stations, and other programs. More on SWACO at www.swaco.org. RASTRA Corporation is a building products company headquartered in Scottsdale, Arizona. Its mission is to provide products for the construction of sustainable and energy efficient buildings. The company’s insulated foam construction system is lightweight in composition and has a recycled content of 80%. Find RASTRA on the worldwide web at www.rastra.com.


OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 19

MAR 13 - MAR 19 2008


20 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

Parades & Events

FEATURE STORY

How much green beer can you drink?

Once again it’s St. Patrick’s Day, the day when everyone is Irish! Join in the fun with these free St. Patrick’s Day events held on and Saturday, March 15 and Monday, March 17, 2008.

St Patrick’s Day/Weekend Event Listings GAY TOWN LISTINGS AWOL, 49 Parsons Ave, 614.621.8779: Green beer, kareoke at 10 and St Patty’s giveaways. Blazer’s Pub, 1205 N High St, 614.299.1800, rascalnut.com/blazers: Corn Beef and cabbage and lots of green beer. Open at noon. Club Columbus, 795 W Fifth Ave, 614.291.0049, theclubs.com: Boys, towels, men, towels, and maybe hotdogs. Cover. The Closet, 1297 Parsons Ave, 614.443.4354: St Patty’s day show on Sat Mar 15. Club Diversity, 863 S High St, 614.224.4050, clubdiversity.com: Saturday March 15, Debe and Bobby Hamlin perform. Part of the bar crawl from Slammers. Monday drink specials. Downtown Connection, 894 W Broad St, 614.223.9600, dccolumbus.com: St. Patrick's Day Pre-Party - Go Green just a few days early this year! Celebrate with green beer, party favors, glow sticks and fun at DC

with our St. Patrick's Day PreParty Saturday night! East Village, 630 N High St, 614.228.3546, eastvillagecolumbus.com: St Patrick’s Day show with Luster and friends. Flex, 1567 E Livingston Ave, flexbaths.com: Gym, towels, men, flexing. Cover. Garrett’s Saloon, 1071 Parsons Ave, 614.484. 0048, garrettssaloon.com: Strippers, party favors and champagne toast. 8p; free.

Q Bar & Nightclub, 205 N. Fifth St, 614.222.2401, q-nation.com: Come show the boys your lucky charms. Wear green and you get into The Green Party on SATURDAY, MARCH 15. Come back Monday for green drinks and Irish pricing. Score Bar, 145 N 5th St, scorebarcolumbus.com: What will you wear to win a trip to Vegas? Win a trip for two to Sin City if you have the best St Patty’s Day outfit. Drink green beer, win prizes and get lucky. Judging at 9p.

Havana, 862 N High St, 614.421.9697, columbusnightlife.com: Green beer. Opening at 2p.

Slammers, 202 E Long St, 614.469.7526: Two pub crawls on SATURDAY, MARCH 15. Drink specials all day Monday starting at 11a.

Jacks, 2210 Summit St, 614.261.9634: Nothing planned.

Somewhere Else, 1312 S. High St, 614.443.4300, somewhereelse.org: Closed.

James’ Club 88, 55 W Long St, 614.223.1213, jamesclub88.com: Closed.

South Bend, 126 E Moler St, 614.444.3386: Celebrate early on SATURDAY, MARCH 15 with $1 well drinks as well as Bud & Bud Light from noon til 7p.

Pyramid II, 211 N 6th St, 614.228.6151: Opening at 2p with Absolute for $2.25 plus other specials.

Tradewinds II, 117 E Chestnut St, 614.461.4110, tradewindsii.com: Maria Garison and her boys are going green for St P. Everybody is irish tonight, kiss away! SUNDAY, MARCH 16 Tremont, 708 S High St, 614.444.2041: $1.25 beer and well drinks. Union, 782 N High St, 614.421.2233, columbusnightlife.com: St Patrick’s Day Show with Nina West, Virginia West and Alexis Stevens including an Irish Kilt Contest and Bud Lght green aluminium. Wall Street, 144 N High St, 614.464.2800, wallstreetnightclub.com: Candice hosts the St Patty’s Single Gay Female party. Get a mumber at the door and send a video message. $1 Jello shots and shadow dancers. FRIDAY MARCH 14 Woof’s, 2063 Livingston Ave, 614.237.3595, woofscolumbus.com:$3 Jack Daniels, Jim Beam or Jose Cuervo all night!

March 15 - Dublin The city with the Irish name is going all out to celebrate on Saturday, March 15, 2008, with parades and fun for all ages. No Blarney Bash this year. However, there are still lots of exciting things happening in Dublin. For complete details on what is going on in Dublin on St. Patrick’s Day visit www.dublin.oh.us. Here is the general schedule for March 15 in Dublin: 7a-11a: Lion’s Club Pancake Breakfast @ Sells Middle School, $6 adults, $4 children under 12 9a: Life Time Fitness 4-Mile Run @ Begins and ends in Historic Dublin. Register online! 11a: The City of Dublin ‘s Greenest, Grandest St. Patrick’s Day Parade Ever @ Begins at Metro Center , travels down S.R. 161 and through Historic Dublin. Watch for many, new exciting parade entries including: Leprechaun Float, Frog Prince Balloon, Shamrock Balloons and much more!

METRO SEXUAL LISTINGS Flannagan’s Dublin, 6835 Caine Rd, 614.766.7788, www.flannagans.com: The mother load of all St Patty’s Parties in town. The largest in the state, it’s the perfect place to start off with kegs and eggs at 5:30a. Inside Band Schedule: 6a - 10a: WNCI Morning Zoo, 10a - 10:30a: The Spill Canvas; 11a - 2:30p: Roundtree; 3p - 6:30p: Nate McDonough Band, 7p 10:30p: The Reaganomics, 11p - 2:30a: Nefarious Ewe. Tent Band Schedule: 8a 11:30a: 70 West; 12p - 3:30p: Pleather; 4p - 6p: The 17th Floor; 6:30p - 8:30p: Dot,Dot,Dot; 9p - 12:30a: Lt. Dan’s New Legs. $5 until 11a, $10 until 7p, $15 until 2a Big Ass St Patty’s Party @ Fitzgerald’s Sports Tavern, 2640 Bethel Rd, 614.457.3489, www.fitzgeraldscolumbus.com: Starting at 6a and going all day. Entertainment includes Charlie TatMAR 13 - MAR 19 2008

man (noon), Terry Davidson & the Geers Band (4p) and Naked Band (9p). Drink and food specials. Prizes all weekend. Green beer galore. $5$10. Free parking. McWags and Elliott St. Patty’s Day Fun @ Billiard Club Pub, 161 911 E DublinGrandville Rd, 614.885.9299: It’s the 2008 St. Patty’s Day Breakfast Club! This in an event you won’t want to miss! There will be plenty of live music, ice cold Budweiser, & great prizes including emerald jewelry from IDG Jewelers, multiple special guests and of course the Annual Booty Pageant. 6a-10a; cover. Byrne’s Pub, 1248 W 3rd Ave, 614.486.4722, byrnespub.com: Tent opens at 8a for Pre-Parade Festivities! Music all day with Dr. Nelson & Sandy Jones (1p), General Guinness (4p) The Kells (8p) and the Shamrock Club Pipe

& Drum Corps. $10. Fado Irish Pub & Restaurant, 4022 Townsfair Way, 614.418.0066, fadoirishpub.com: Tent and bands on weekend long. Kegs and eggs on Monday starting at 8a. Join Quizmasters’ Brandon & Bill for the Best Pub Quiz in Columbus. Win prizes. Music for the day includes: Six Pack Theory, Irish duo Sean Kay, John Andrews, Homeland, Ni Charra School, JuJu Bees, Blood, Sweat, Beers, & Prodigals. 8a-11a $5; 11a-3p $10; 3p-close $15.

pubs.com: Doors at 10a followed by 13 hours of live entertainment starting at 11a. O’ Shaughnessy’s Public House, 401 N Front St, 614.224.6767, ospub.com: Come on down to O’Shughnessy’s Public House for the a fierce St. Patrick’s Day Celebration. Open for $5 brunch 9a-11a, dancers and pipers throughout the day. Drink specials. $5 cover. County Cork Irish Pub, 4065 Main St, 614.777.0713, countycorkirishpub.com: Corn beef & cabbage special & band at 6p.

Claddagh Irish Pub - Downtown, 585 S Front St, 614.224.1560, claddaghirishpubs.com: Doors at 9a for Irish Breakfast followed by 13 hours of live entertainment py starting at 11a. Hap Claddagh Irish Pub - Polaris, 8745 Sancus Blvd, 614.885.0100, claddaghirish-

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March 17 - Columbus On Monday, March 17, 2008, downtown Columbus celebrates with the annual St. Patrick’s Day parade. The Feast of St. Patrick is celebrated each year by the Shamrock Club with a procession to Mass, Mass, Parade, and the annual Irish Family Reunion. The parade will form at Nationwide Blvd. and John H. McConnell Blvd, between 10:30a - 11a. The parade will start at 11:45a. and proceed east on Nationwide Blvd to High St, south on High St to Broad St, west on Broad St. to Veterans Memorial, where the parade will disband at the direction of the Parade Marshals; the Shamrock Club’s Annual Irish Family Reunion will begin at Vets Memorial. Head to the club after for bands and more booze. For more information visit shamrockclubofcolumbus.com.


OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 21

MAR 13 - MAR 19 2008


22 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

OUT OF TOWN by Chris Hayes

UNTAMED GETAWAY PACKAGE FEATURES ENDANGERED WILD ANIMALS, WATERPARK AND THE WORKS CoCo Key Water Resort at Cherry Valley Lodge, the Wilds and The Works have teamed up to offer a oneof-a-kind experience that perfectly pairs education with fun. Offered May 1 through October 31, 2008, the “Wild Waterpark Works!” package invites families to learn, explore and have fun during an entire weekend that’s rich with unique experiences, yet won’t break the bank. Travelers can book their “Wild Waterpark Works!” package by visiting cherryvalleylodge.com or calling 800.788.8088 and using promo code: WILDWORKS. Starting at just $388 for a family of four, this extraordinary package includes: ·Deluxe Cherry Valley Lodge accommodations for two adults and two children for two nights ·Four two-day passes to CoCo Key indoor waterpark ·An outdoor safari for four at the Wilds ·Passes for four to The Works discovery museum ·Additional guests may be added for a nominal per-person fee The Wilds is a 10,000-acre conservation center located just 30 miles from Cherry Valley Lodge. The largest and most innovative wildlife conservation center in the world, the Wilds offers visitors an unusual safari that takes them past more than two dozen species of rare and endangered wildlife from Africa, Asia and North America. Hundreds of other indigenous species add to this unforgettable safari, which is unlike any other experience found on the planet. A unique discovery center that inspires an appreciation for industry, innovation and the creative process, The Works is a museum and educational complex where guests can travel back in time with intriguing history exhibits, check out daily glassblowing demonstrations and enjoy hands-on experiences, such as building electrical circuits, tearing apart computers, designing and racing toy cars, and much more. Cherry Valley Lodge is a 200-room resort located in near Newark, 25 miles east of Columbus. It’s got the quintessential ski lodge feel. The Rich and rustic interior design features a dramatic lobby with a pair of towering stone fireplaces. Unusually large guestrooms offer luxurious appointments, while the 50,000-square-foot Key West-themed CoCo Key indoor waterpark offers pure excitement. The full-service Banyan Lea Spa helps guests gain a sense of wellbeing in an elegant tropical setting. Two beautifully landscaped courtyards and 18 country acres have gained Cherry Valley Lodge the distinction of being the nation’s only hotel that’s also an officially sanctioned arboretum and botanical garden. CoCo Key Water Resorts, created in partnership with Wave Development LLC and Sage Hospitality MAR 13 - MAR 19 2008

Resources, are the newest water resort development in the US, offering Key West-themed family adventure getaways. Always an ultra-warm 84 degrees, CoCo Key Water Resort’s décor and atmosphere reflect the tropical appeal of historic Key West. Three untamed water slides, an activity pool, “dip-in” movie theater, indoor adventure river, indoor/outdoor spa, interactive play island, splash pad, lounge, arcade, cabanas, bar, private function and birthday party spaces offer families truly unforgettable experiences to be shared together. The Galley snack bar features Pizza Hut Express, Dippin’ Dots and loads of other family favorites. A six-foot-tall version of “CoCo,” the resort’s famous parrot mascot, entertains guests, poses for pictures and attends parties. Now you might be saying I don’t have a family or this atmosphere doesn’t seem to “family” friendly, but you would be wrong. I have been to the lodge a few times with my best friend Steph as a getaway and we’ve had a blast each time. The staff is accommodating and accepting - one lodge bartender made it her mission to find the local gay nightlife spots for us. It took her several calls to her family and friends, but she eventually had the place to go. Our last visit was to check out the new water park where Steph and I found the joys of being a kid again, even though we didn’t have any children with us! A tad apprehensive at first, thinking we might look like high schoolers playing on the elementary playground, we headed to the bar for a couple of piña coladas. As we slipped on our frozen refreshments, we took in the sights. CoCo Key is pretty massive with activity everywhere. It can seem a bit chaotic until you get the lay of the land. Kids of all ages abound, and it’s hard not to smile when you see so many people having a good time. Ok now, I should stop here and say that if you don’t care for children, CoCo Key might not be the place for you. Kids are everywhere - it’s the motherlode for them. And as we found, it was for us, too. I don’t think you are ever too old to enjoy a good waterslide, float on the lazy river or run to get drenched by hundreds of gallons of water. Watching kids line up to get an enormous bucket of water dumped on them is priceless, and no one batted an eye that we were part of the water glutton pack because adults were everywhere having a good time, too. They were at the bar, race sliding their kids, lounging in the hot tub, and playing water sports. We never felt out of place, or that, because we didn’t have kids, we didn’t belong. It was just fun. It is the perfect place to take the kids, or the perfect place to go be a kid. Either way, it’s all good. For more info see www.cherryvalleylodge.com.

Cherry Valley also has a great restaurant and bar to eat in, especially for breakfast. Their signature cherry French toast is a must. But they are also know for their desserts. Here is one of their recipes to temp you into a visit. Chocolate Pots De Crème with White Chocolate Whipped Cream 2 cups whipping cream 4 ounces semi sweet chocolate, chopped 1 teaspoon instant espresso powder or coffee powder 6 large egg yolks 3 tablespoons sugar White Chocolate Whipped Cream Position rack in center of oven and preheat to 325 degrees F. Arrange six 3/4 cup custard cups or soufflé dishes in roasting pan. Combine whipping cream, chopped semisweet chocolate and instant espresso powder in a heavy medium saucepan. Bring almost to a simmer over medium heat, whisking until chocolate melts and mixture is smooth. Whisk egg yolks and sugar in large bowl to blend. Gradually whisk in hot cream mixture. Divide custard equally among cups. Pour enough hot water into pan to come halfway up sides of cups. Bake custards until just set around edges but still soft in center, about 25 minutes. Remove cups from water. Refrigerate uncovered until cold, at least 2 hours. (Can be made 1 day ahead. Cover and keep refrigerated. ) Spoon White Chocolate Whipped Cream atop custards and serve. Makes 6 servings.


OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 23

MAR 13 - MAR 19 2008


24 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

DEEP INSIDE HOLLYWOOD by Romeo San Vicente

MURPHY AND PAGE FORM A TRIANGLE

BRAVO TAKES ANOTHER STE INTO GAY TV

Irish actor Cillian Murphy may be best known in this country for his villainous turns in Batman Begins and Red Eye , but he also received a Golden Globe nomination for his dazzling performance as a transgender singer in Neil Jordan’s Breakfast on Pluto . Murphy will have another chance to tap into his feminine side with Peacock , in which he plays a small-town man with a split personality - he’s a husband and wife, all wrapped up in one body, whom the locals think are separate people. Trouble occurs when a young mother ( Juno cutie Ellen Page) falls in love with Murphy’s male side, prompting a conflict between the married pair he’s got inside of him. Michael Lander makes his directorial debut with Peacock , which should strut into theaters in 2009.

After Queer Eye and Boy Meets Boy and Project Runway and Top Chef and Make Me a Supermodel , could the cable network Bravo get any gayer? Of course! Now they’ve got Step It Up and Dance , premiering April 3, featuring a dozen hoofers competing to see whose toes are the twinkliest. Four of the contestants are gay - so far, anyway, but more revelations could emerge before the show goes on the air - and openly fabulous Broadway choreographer Jerry Mitchell ( Hairspray , Legally Blonde ) will be on hand to whip these chorines into shape. Still not gay enough for you? Perhaps Romeo should mention that this show will be hosted by none other than Showgirls star Elizabeth (“Thrust it!”) Berkley. Shine up your taps, kids - this sounds like one you won’t want to miss.

BRET EASTON ELLIS’ LATEST IS A DOWNER Bret Easton Ellis is simply cooler than most people. He wrote American Psycho , after all. The fact that the public commentary on his sexuality has ranged over the years from “Yep, I’m quite possibly gay” to “Can we just not bother talking about it?” only serves to draw attention to the terrifically deranged nature of his work. From Less Than Zero to his latest novel, Lunar Park , Ellis knows what it means to be modern and miserable. The film version of Lunar is currently “in production,” meaning it’ll be seen who-knows-when. But Ellis has a screenplay in the works that’s even more intriguing. Titled Downers Grove and adapted from the novel by Michael Hornburg, it concerns a high school girl who knows that someone in her school will die at graduation in a strange way. So think Final Destination with more disaffection and horny teenagers. In other words, Hollywood, green-light this movie!

LIFETIME GETS MEAN WITH FAB FIVE It would seem that gay men and junior high school girls are the prime marketing demographics for movies about bitchy cheerleaders, making it a tough genre to resist. Well, now Lifetime has succumbed to the genre’s steely charms, too. The Fab Five: The Texas Cheerleader Scandal , starring Tatum O’Neal, is on its way to an HD screen near you and, as is usually the case, it’s based on a true story. It seems that a small clique of mean-girl cheerleaders ran roughshod over anyone they didn’t like and almost got away with it, until a coach blew the whistle and called foul. What better punishment, then, than to immortalize the girls’ evil antics in a TV movie, and who better than the star of Little Darlings to add some authenticity? No word on an air date yet. But Romeo’s TiVo will be there.

Romeo San Vicente thinks all male cheerleaders are national heroes. He can be reached care of this publication or at DeepInsideHollywood@qsyndicate.com.

ARTS by Kay Wiebell

King Arts Complex Anniversary Gala sizzles with “Artistry of Soul” This year, The King Arts Complex will begin celebrating its 21st anniversary with the Artistry of Soul - an evening of soulful dancing, fine cuisine and live entertainment. Artistry of Soul is a journey into the past and a celebration of the present as we reflect on the rich history of the King Arts Complex and the historic King-Lincoln District. This exciting event will take place on Saturday, May 17 from 8p-2a. The Artistry of Soul affair will feature live entertainment from national recording artist Dwele, swooning cool neo-soul as well as performances by local artists Shaun Booker, the Andrew Waters Trio, Charles Cooper Quartet, Middle Child, T. Michael Branner, Dean Simms and the Funky Gurus, Jimmy McGee, B Jazz and the dynamic duo of Mary McClendon and Jeannette Williams. In addition, guests will be treated to the dynamic sounds of Columbus’ hottest DJ’s, The Usual Suspects Crew, and DJ Lane Love from Chicago. Guests are invited to indulge in sumptuous cuisine by many of Columbus’ premier caterers and restaurants. Back by popular demand, is the KAC Casino, featuring blackjack, roulette, Texas Hold ‘Em’ and returning for the second year; the one armed bandits are fully loaded- come and take MAR 13 - MAR 19 2008

a chance with the slot machines. Widely known and respected for its commitment to the arts, the King Arts Complex event will also feature a silent auction featuring original works by nationally acclaimed artists and fine jewelers. In 2007, the celebration attracted over 1300 guests and is anticipated to increase this year. It is being touted as the premier event of 2008. “The King Arts Complex’s gala has some of the best energy and artistic ambiance I have experienced” said Eric Roberson, national acclaimed performance artist after performing in the Gala in 2007 along with neo-soul sensation Conya Doss. For the past two decades, The King Arts Complex has served as a jewel in the Central Ohio Arts Community. Located just minutes from downtown in one of the oldest, African American Communities in Columbus, The King Arts Complex remains true in its mission of enriching and improving the quality of life in the community by offering performing, cultural and educational programs that focus on the rich heritage and contributions of African Americans to America and to the World, while building bridges of harmony among all communities.

The gala is our largest fundraising event of the year and we have been extremely excited to have a diverse grouping of caterers & restaurants join our efforts to provide an array of food stations. This year’s list includes All Around Catering, Aramark, City BBQ, Creole Kitchen, Hyatt Regency Columbus, Mary Haven Catering, JLS Catering, Linden Café, Ms. B’s, Smackies Barbeque to name a few. Tickets to this “soulful couture” event begin at $50 per person or $80 per couple for KAC Members. Non members will be $65 per person, $100 per couple. In addition, VIP tickets are available for an additional $25

to the existing ticket price and includes a VIP private reception which begins at 7p. All attendees will partake of cuisine stations and signature beverages, cash bar provided. For more information or tickets contact The King Arts Complex, contact: 614.645.5464. For more information, call The King Arts Complex at 614-645-KING (5464) or visit www.thekingartscomplex.com. Kay Wiebell is Marketing/Membership Director for The King Arts Complex, a member organization of the Columbus Arts Marketing Association. For more information, visit www.camaonline.org.


OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 25

DVDIVA by Gregg Shapiro

Black and White Tongues Untied

Sydney White

(Frameline/Strand Releasing) – Bookended by a “brother to brother” chant, the acclaimed – and according to Jesse Helms and other right wing fanatics, controversial – and unapologetic documentary 1990 Tongues Untied by the late gay filmmaker Marlon Riggs serves to move Black, gay men from silence and invisibility to being vocal and visible. Riggs achieves this through artful use of poetry (primarily by the late gay writer Essex Hemphill) and monologues, acknowledging and celebrating that “Black men loving Black men is the revolutionary act.” Mute and tongue-tied no more, the men in Tongues Untied set out to break the silence through a series of monologues and group scenes that touch on political activism, racism, a basic lesson in “snapping,” rage, the anti-gay rhetoric of both the church and a high profile entertainer such as Eddie Murphy, ball culture in New York, eroticism, and the scourge of AIDS. One extended scene focuses on the painful journey from “punk” to “homo” to “faggot” to “freak” all the while being “cornered by identities” that one speaker never wanted to claim. In San Francisco, the same speaker becomes “immersed in vanilla” while also becoming keenly aware of his invisibility in the “great gay Mecca.” Almost 20 years after it was made, Tongues Untied has lost none of its impact and is required viewing by all members of the LGBT community. DVD special features include a 1991 interview with Riggs, extra scenes, and interviews with AIDS activist Phill Wilson, cultural critic Herman Gray, filmmaker Isaac Julien and hip-hop artist Juba Kalamka.

(Universal) - In this modern re-telling of Snow White and the Seven Dwarves, the titular character Sydney (Amanda Bynes, still mugging for the camera) is heading for her freshman year of college at Southern Atlantic University. Sydney was raised by her widower/plumber dad Paul (John Schneider) and his construction worker pals, because her mom died when Sydney was nine. Sydney is pledging the Kappa sorority because she is a legacy, but a lot has changed in the Kappa house since her mom Deb was a sorority sister. The evil queen on campus, Rachel (Sara Paxton), checks the online hot/not hot poll daily to make sure that she is still the fairest of them all. However, the arrival of Sydney and the attention being paid to her by the aptly named frat stud Tyler Prince (Matt Long) throws Rachel into a wicked tizzy. After publicly humiliating her during her attempt to pledge Kappa, Rachel sends Sydney packing, and she ends up on the doorstep of the rundown house known as The Vortex, the overflow student housing site which serves as home to the seven dorks. Sydney moves in with sneezy Lenny (Jack Carpenter), sleepy Embele (Donté Bonner), bashful Jeremy (Adam Hendershott), dopey George (Arnie Pantoja), grumpy Gurkin (Danny Strong), happy Sparky (Samm Levine), and Doc-like Terence (Jeremy Howard), and sets about making changes in their lives and in the lives of the underrepresented student majority on campus. Naturally, Rachel isn’t having it when Tyler shows more than the least bit of interest in Syndey and she sets out to destroy her rival. The Greeks versus the geeks tale is essentially Mean Girls goes to college, minus the sharp social commentary. In fact, the unfortunate overuse of student stereotypes (goth, GLBT, ROTC, religious and ethnic) threatens to take a bite out of the often witty material. The bounty of bonus features includes a gag reel, deleted scenes, and more than seven featurettes. MAR 13 - MAR 19 2008


26 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

BOOKMARKS by William J. Mann

Tim Miller Invites Us To Peek Into His Glory Box As He And His Partner Alistair Mccartney Are Pushed To The End Of The World In Mccartney’s New Novel!

William J. Mann: So What’s a GLORY BOX? It sounds nasty! Tim Miller: Well, it’s not what you think it is! A glory box is what people in Australia call a hope chest. Glory Box is a funny, sexy and charged exploration of my journeys through the challenge of love, gay marriage, and the struggle for immigration rights for gay people and their partners. I looked at my life and pulled out some of the funny and sexy narratives of how my sense of relationships was shaped (i.e. fucked up) by the culture I grew up in. The piece dives into all kinds of juicy stuff from a wild story about asking another boy to marry me in 3rd grade (he beat me up and jammed a Twinkie down my throat) to the harrowing travails of being in a bi-national relationship with my Australian partner Alistair (the US government beats me up and jams its homophobic laws denying gay partners immigration rights). I think I preferred the Twinkie! I hope that Glory Box leads the audience on an intense and humorous journey into the complexity of the queer human heart that knows no boundary. WM: So, it’s pretty interesting timing that just as both you and Tim are potentially about to be pushed to the edge of the world, your novel The End of the World Book has come out. How long before your visa runs out? How have your struggles informed the writing of this book? Does the book address your immigration struggles directly like Tim’s work? Alistair McCartney: Well, yes, as you say the timing is pretty interesting, to put it lightly. Basically my current visa runs out February 9, so I guess that gives us right now a little under a year. While I’m incredibly excited to have my book coming out, at the same time, while I begin promoting the book and a national tour, Tim and I are also trying to figure out how we might continue to stay in this country, so it’s obviously been an incredibly stressful time, filled with a lot of uncertainty and anxiety. WM: Tell me about GLORY BOX. How do you get at this very hot material about bi-national couple’s situation, which is probably news for lots of people? Plus, how do you make it entertaining? TM: I’m told it’s my most enjoyable show I’ve done!!! Glory Box is both the most emotionally intense and the funniest piece I have ever made. There is something about the urgency of the material that brings all this out. The humor comes up in the show just as it does in

MAR 13 - MAR 19 2008

life as a way of dealing with the stress of the situation. I know that many gay people really don’t realize that if you fall in love with someone from another country you have no ability to include that person in your life under US law. Any heterosexual person can fall in love with someone of the opposite sex, marry him or her and make them a citizen. Unless their partner blew up a bridge in Bolivia or something, all heterosexual marriages are given immigration rights. On the other hand, NO gay person may have the same special right that straight people take for granted. I think it’s a very tangible way that we can see how unfairly US culture treats our committed relationships. Ultimately Glory Box is a hyper-romantic love story and audiences, straight and gay, relate to the show in that way. We Americans are so soppy and sentimental—it’s one of the things that might save us! This very human, funny and moving story about the deep capacity of lesbian and gay people to love one another without ANY help or encouragement from our society strikes a chord with folks. I am glad it both hits the funny bone and pulls those heartstrings! WM: Interesting as you guys are pushed to the “ends of the world” Alistair’s novel The End of the World Book arrives, which as I read it struck me as your own personal encyclopedia, your own very Queer 21st century version of the World Book Encyclopedia? It’s a brilliant idea-we all grew up with the World Book Encyclopedia, right? AM: Well, it really begins with a deep lifelong passion I’ve had for the World Book. The process was pretty organic, and like most things in my writing I stumbled upon it by accident or by surprise. I was born and grew up in Perth, Western Australia, which in that other World Book Encyclopedia is always listed as the most isolated, industrialized city in the world. Growing up there you feel really separate and apart from the world, in your own world as it were. I was also the youngest of seven kids-my nearest sibling was six years older than me, so I kind of had the experience of being an only child in an odd way. Both those factors saw me spending a lot of time by myself, daydreaming. Like most families we had our edition of the World Book Encyclopedia, and given the isolation of where I grew up, and being the youngest, the World Book was like my constant companion throughout childhood. I must have spent thousands of hours obsessively going through every volume.

WM: How did your writing evolve into an encyclopedia? AM: Well, One day I was just writing, I think it was about “Lust”, and I put a big letter L in big font at the top of the page, then the word Lust, just like you would see in an encyclopedia. I started playing around with more letters; W came next, for an entry on the World. It just unfolded from there. The form I needed to be working in suddenly seemed so obvious, but of course it took me years to get there. It gave a system and an order to my anarchic imagination, which of course then freed me from the constraints of both creative non-fiction and fiction. So now I think of myself as a novelist, because although I always use real names and often write about real scenarios, I’d never call what I do nonfiction-it’s all straight from my imagination and dream-life, but I’m also an encyclopedist, a very queer one, describing and categorizing the contents of my unconscious. WM: Tim, you are notorious for getting naked in your shows. What role does nudity play in performance? TM: In my own work I am more interested in exploring the most vulnerable and fucked up parts of myself in a naked performance section. In GLORY BOX I get naked in a sweet section about how I used to take off all my clothes when I was a little kid, climb in my mom’s wooden hope chest and snuggle into the fake chinchilla jacket to breathe in that cedar-drenched world. My adult naked body in the performance becomes sweetly redolent of childhood longing and memories and invites all the metaphors that we can cram in that hope chest with me naked! Now, I’ve written this naked-in-the-hope chest stuff as a short story for the page, but there is something about my naked body in real time in the theater crammed into that hope chest on the stage that totally changes, deepens the text. It gets the words sweaty! As long as I don’t get splinters in my butt, that’s what I want to do! Get those words to become FLESH!” WM: What will you guys do to stay together? AM: I’ve been in the States since 1997, almost a third of my adult life, and I feel far more American than I do Australian these days. I mean, I’m married to an American, in every sense of the word, except legally of course, so I actually consider myself an American, though of course without any formal recognition as such, or any papers.

TM: Right now, couples like Alistair and I are offered three scenarios: your partner is deported, you break up, or you both leave the country and make a life in a more civilized nation than America. Not very pleasant options. Fortunately Alistair has passports from two countries (Australia and the UK) that give gay people and their partners immigration rights. I have this completely romantic thought that art can change the world and that something is going to change. The unfairness of this situation is so outrageous. Meanwhile, I’m going to work my little performance art booty off to raise awareness, money and trouble with Glory Box. I want the piece to conjure for the audience a new glory box, a new kind of hope chest, that can be an alternative site for the placing of memories, hopes and dreams of gay people’s extraordinary potential for love. March 18 at 8p Alistair McCartney reads for free at Ohio Wesleyan University’s Mean Bean Café, upstairs lounge located at 2 N Sandusky St, Delaware, Ohio. March 19 Ohio Wesleyan University’s GLBT Resource Center is pleased to welcome internationally acclaimed performance artist Tim Miller in his performance of his solo work Glory Box at 8p on the Chappelear Drama Center Main Stage on Ohio Wesleyan Campus (45 Rowland Ave, Delaware, OH). Tickets are free, but donations to benefit GLBT programming on Ohio Wesleyan’s campus will be accepted. For more information, or to reserve tickets. Call 740.368.3196. On March 20 at 7p, Alistair McCartney & Tim Miller read at Suspect Thoughts Books (4903 Clark Ave, Cleveland, OH, 216.631.2665), free. On March 21, Tim Miller performs his award-winning show 1001 BEDS as a benefit for Cleveland LGBT Community Center at C-Space, (4323 Clark Ave, Cleveland, OH, 216.631.2233 ), at 7:30p; $15. On March 25, Tim Miller performs Glory Box at in Studio 88 at the Center for the Performing Arts on the campus of Miami University, Oxford Ohio. Curtain is at 8pm and admission is FREE but tickets are required. Please contact the Miami Box Office at 513.529.3200 or online at www.tickets.muohio.edu William J Mann is the award-winning author of “The Men from The Boys” and “Kate”. Tim Miller can be reached through his website at http://hometown.aol.com/millertale/ and Alistair at http://hometown.aol.com/meaningme/


OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 27

THEATRE by Michael Daniels

Goodbye, Tanya Michelle: Shadowbox World Premiere’s Tabloid, The Musical

Take equal parts Evita, Hair, “Candle In the Wind,” and Anna Nicole Smith. Shake, don’t stir. What do you get? The newest offering from Shadowbox – Tabloid, The Musical. After a ten year hiatus from self-producing original musicals, the folks at Shadowbox have outdone themselves yet again. Tabloid is a witty, funny, dark commentary on modern celebrity and the cultdom and culture that surrounds it. Regular Outlook readers know that I love Shadowbox and its cast and crew, and normally begin my reviews talking about the singing and the music. In the case of Tabloid, I simply cannot use that formula. I must begin by commending Jimmy Mak on an amazing script/book and concept. Mak’s talent for writing cutting and creative sketches is well known, but with Tabloid, he marks himself as a full-scale production writer and talent. Stev Guyer, Shadowbox founder and all-around

big cheese, serves as the production’s director and executive producer, and we can fully believe Guyer when he says of Mak’s opus, “My job was simply to not fuck it up.” Guyer was joined by Matthew Hahn and Adam Fauth in writing a complete and original sountrack/score for the musical, and their range of talent shines. In typical Shadowbox style, the video work of Fauth, David Whitehouse, and Rebecca Parsons is integral to, not distracting from, the stage production. Tabloid is billed as the story of Tanya Michelle Jones (Amy Lay’s best performance since Cabaret), a white-trash girl from West Virginia who goes to Hollywood, becomes a starlet, marries a wealthy octogenarian, inherits his money, spends it all on hard

parties and fast times, and dies all too young. In reality, Tabloid is far less about Tanya Michelle and far more about everyone around her. It’s about her even-whiter-trash mother (Julie Klein) who can’t stand to see Tanya leave her hometown and who can’t, or won’t, believe in her dreams. It’s about her first agent, Gibby Maxwell (Whitehouse) who exploits the naïve girl but on whom the tables eventually are turned. It’s about the producer, Lars Mobley (Robbie Nance) who introduces her to the world of reality television and recreational pharmaceuticals. It’s about her best friend, Bethany Styles (Christina Conner) who parties with and envies her. But most of all, Tabloid is about reporter Sally Dubrowski (Stacie Boord) and how she deals with

not only Tanya Michelle’s flaws and indiscretions, but also how she comes to appreciate Tanya’s hopes, dreams, and humanity. Strong vocals performances by Boord and Lay are supported and underscored by those of Conner, Klein and Whitehouse. Guyer, Nance, and the remainder of the cast support and enhance the main characters, and minor roles add just the right touch of comic relief and biting reality – thanks especially to Katy Psenicka as Meredith Bible and Josh Davidson as Kip. Tabloid is a musical not to be missed. Catch it here first, before Guyer and team take it to New York with their eyes on a Broadway run. Oh, and if you hear some business about E.A.P. … well, you’ll just have to see the show. Tabloid, The Musical runs Sundays 3p and 7:30p through April 27. Tickets are $30/$20. For more information, call the Shadowbox box office at 614.416.7625 or visit www.shadowboxcabaret.com or www.tabloidthemusical.com.

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28 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

SEX TALK by Simon Sheppard

SPEAKING OF

CHEATING

Men fuck around. Maybe not all men, and certainly not always. But it’s a well-established fact that when temptation beckons, guys tend to give in. And few things can destroy a relationship faster than infidelity. There is, of course, a societal expectation that sex will be reserved for the One You Love - or at least for somebody you like a whole lot. But the male of the species is known for his ability to have recreational, even anonymous, sex at the drop of a horny hat. And while some guys can remain happily faithful for decades, for others, the draw of new dick can be too much. Indeed, just the taboo nature of forbidden fruit can prove a strong attraction. When a guy indulges in outside nookie, be it an ongoing affair or just a hotel-room fuck, the excitement of sneaking around can make infidelity seem even more significant...and alluring. There are many reasons to cheat: a dearth of sex in a primary relationship, declining passion for the boyfriend, a desire to explore new sexual stuff, or a perverse desire to hurt one’s partner. While there are guys who get away with it, even successful behind-the-back action can take its emotional toll. Dealing with guilt isn’t easy...or romantic. Sexual suspicion can undermine even the most solid-seeming affair. And actually being found out - something that happens more often than not - can create a major crisis. “What got me,” says one wronged guy, “is that while I was restraining myself, being a good, faithful boy, my ex was fucking anything in pants. And on top of that, I figured that his rarely being horny was my fault. Unfair!” One real question, though, is just what constitutes “cheating.” For many gay guys, the definition is nowhere as clear-cut as it is in the heterosexual world. Since male/male sex has always defied convention anyway, it’s no surprise that many gay couples have less-than-standard ground rules. And if it isn’t against the rules, then it isn’t really cheating. Each relationship is unique, of course, and adaptations to nonmonogamy can range from the don’t-ask-don’t-telling “I don’t care what you do, just as long as I don’t know about it,” to the easygoing “Hey, honey, want to have a threeway tonight?” Says one fellow who’s been with his partner for over a decade, “I guess that we’re lucky - nei-

MAR 13 - MAR 19 2008

ther of us is prone to sexual jealousy. So from the first, we decided to have an open relationship. What that means in our case is not having to report outside sex, but never lying about it, either.” And his partner adds, “For us, emotional fidelity, not sexual monogamy, is the vital thing. Where he puts his heart is much more important to me than where he puts his prick.” But not everyone concurs. “I think that open relationships are a sign of self-indulgent immaturity. If a partner really loves me,” says a fellow in his 20s, “he’ll save his ass for me.” And if he doesn’t? “Everybody slips once or twice, and forgiveness is a virtue. But if I were to discover that a boyfriend was always sneaking around behind my back, it would be ultimatum time.” So how do you deal with a partner who’s straying - or just suspected thereof? Says one understanding bachelor who has helped several partnered friends through connubial crises, “I know that the standard answer is to go to a counselor and talk things out, and that can be a great idea. On the other hand, if you love your partner but find him sexually boring, I’m not sure a visit to a therapist is going to solve things. In some cases, it’s probably better to just accept that your boyfriend’s going to go to bed with other men, and trust that the love between you will remain secure.” Continues our helpful bachelor, “I know that many people - including queer men - are baffled by the idea of successful open relationships. But let’s face it, if a guy is dissatisfied with what he gets at home, he’s either going to go elsewhere, or feel deprived and resentful.” Sure, honesty can hurt. But dishonesty can hurt a lot more. Perhaps it’s unrealistic to expect that another man can fulfill all your needs forever. But double-dealing, keeping secrets, and avoiding the truth “because it would hurt him too much” are destructive, both to yourself and to a significant other. Whether saint or slut, working through things with the one you love is most always for the best. It may sound like something your first-grade teacher told you, but some advice never goes out of fashion: Play fair, dude. Simon Sheppard is the editor of Homosex: Sixty Years of Gay Erotica, and the author of Sex Parties 101, Kinkorama, and In Deep: Erotic Stories, and can be reached at SexTalk@qsyndicate.com. Visit Simon at www.simonsheppard.com.


OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 29

SAVAGE LOVE by Dan Savage

Open marriages - do they ever work? After 16 years and one kid, my husband and I are considering an open marriage. Over a year ago, I met another man who I was attracted to and wanted to fuck. I had met men like this throughout our marriage, but never did anything because I was married and respectful of the monogamous relationship we had. I would just bring that “crush” energy home and take it out on my husband. Our sex life has always been okay, nothing mind blowing, but steady. Well, we hit the inevitable rut that couples sometimes get into and I was bored and frustrated and wanted more than my husband was giving me. I asked, but he just wasn’t interested in exploring anything more than the vanilla sex we were already having. I gently tried toys, porn, going out to bars and checking out others for three-ways. He wasn’t interested. So I made peace with the fact that I was stuck with a vanilla guy and just focused on the other parts that worked good partner, good man, steady guy. A little boring, but better than a drama freak. Then about a year ago, I met someone who turned from a friendship into a strong attraction. Instead of having an affair, I told my husband that I wanted to be able to pursue sex with this person since I wasn’t getting what I wanted at home. Husband got pissed and said no way (no surprise), but that if I did do anything, he didn’t want to know about it. Don’t ask, don’t tell. I didn’t do anything out of respect for him, but it made me resentful. So I decided to ask for a divorce before entering into an affair, and about five months ago my husband and I separated. I have been seeing the other man during this time and the sex has been amazing - he’s doing the things that I begged my husband to do with me. My husband has been miserable without me and has agreed to an open marriage so we can still be together, be a family, and I can be free to have an outside relationship. My husband is also free to have an outside relationship. He now accepts that I’ve been with another man (whom he has met) and that I am capable of loving him as a husband while having a sexual relationship on the side. This has been a long letter, I realize, but all I want to know is if this is a recipe for disaster. Am I fooling myself about the reality of opening a marriage up to include outside lovers? Does it only sound good in theory? Trying To Find Happiness Open marriages work, TTFH, but only sometimes - just like, um, what are those other things that only work sometimes called again?

Oh, right: closed marriages. Will your open marriage work? I couldn’t tell you. But I can tell you something that you already know: Your closed marriage definitely wasn’t working. You were no longer willing to settle for the sex life you shared with your husband, you decided to separate, and you were headed for divorce. Then your husband concluded that being together and being a family was more important to him than being sexually exclusive. And so you’re back together - for now. Will it work out over the long run? It could, TTFH, but only if you keep those lines of communication open, treat each other with love and respect, and make sure that, emotionally if not sexually, you are each other’s top priority. And if your open marriage doesn’t work out, if it’s a disaster, what’s the worst that can happen? You wind up getting a divorce - which you were about to do anyway. So I wouldn’t say that openness is a threat to your marriage, TTFH. I’d say it’s your marriage’s last chance. I just started dating a great girl who is significantly younger than me. I’m 35 and she’s 20. As a longtime reader, I know and agree with your “campsite rule” about having sex with younger people: I have a responsibility to leave her in better shape than I found her. Part of that is easy - be honest, caring, open, GGG, etc. - but I would like to humbly request that you ask your readers who have been in relationships with a large age gap what their partners did for them that left them better off? Or worse off? Love the column and podcast! One Less Douche Honoring my campsite rule - which applies to older folks sleeping with significantly younger folks - doesn’t merely require that you be honest, caring, open, and GGG, OLD. It also means that you do all you can to make sure this young woman emerges from this relationship with no STIs, no fertilized eggs, no restraining orders, no emotional trauma, and with improved sexual skills. To aid you in doing that, I’m happy to invite readers to serve up specific, real-life examples of older partners honoring the campsite rule. Were you once involved with a significantly older partner? Did you emerge in better shape? Please write in and let us know what your older partner did right - or wrong. I’m a loyal fan and a physician who cares for people living with HIV. I was reading a column from a few months back and appreciated your candid response to an HIV-negative man who was embarking on a new sexual relationship with a known HIV-positive

man. However, I would have hoped that you would touch upon what a guy should do if a condom DOES break. According to CDC guidelines, if a person receives HIV medicine within 72 hours of a condom breaking or another “exposure,” there is evidence that you can actually prevent HIV infection. Of course, these medicines have to be taken for 28 days, have lots of side effects, and are not always effective. I would never promote unprotected sex with the idea that you could just take the medicines afterward and have no worries. The medical world has termed this “postexposure prophylaxis.” It has been the standard of care since January 2005. I was just hoping that you would share this with your readers. From the number of patients I continue to see, I am unsure if this is public knowledge. Pittsburgh Doctor Thanks for sharing, PD. NOW FOR A LITTLE SEX-POSITIVE JOURNALISM: Recently, the sex-negative journalism of a certain teeveenewz reporter - Kandiss Crone of WLBT News in Jackson, Mississippi - annoyed me so much that I devoted an entire column to slapping Crone around. I even urged my readers to send Crone angry e-mails and, er, used sex toys. Perhaps I went a little overboard. Crone isn’t the only “journalist” out there doing idiotic, sex-negative work. Fact is, most of what gets written and published about sex is negative and sensationalistic. This sad state of affairs inspired the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom, the Center for Sex & Culture, Babeland, and journalist Miriam Axel-Lute to launch the Sex-Positive Journalism Awards. By drawing attention to good, sex-positive reporting, the “Sexies” hope to promote fair, accurate, and nonsensationalized coverage of sexual topics. “The fact that sex-positive journalism is so rare means we need the help of all of you readers out there to help us turn up those gems of good, objective, sex-positive reporting,” says Axel-Lute. “Especially in mainstream sources.” I’m proud to have been asked to serve as a judge for the first annual Sex-Positive Journalism Awards. The deadline for submissions for the first annual “Sexies” is March 23, 2008. (The piece must have been published during 2007.) Anyone can submit a piece for consideration at the “Sexies” website: www.sexies.org. Anything by Kandiss Crone is, of course, ineligible. Download Savage Lovecast (my weekly podcast) every Tuesday at www.thestranger.com/savage. mail@savagelove.net

MAR 13 - MAR 19 2008


30 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

ABOUT TOWN COLUMBUS GAY MEN’S CHORUS TEAMS UP WITH PROMUSICA CHAMBER ORCHESTRA TO PRESENT STRINGS ATTACHED A COLLABORATIVE PERFORMANCE FOR ONE NIGHT ONLY The Columbus Gay Men’s Chorus (CGMC) continues its 18th season with a dynamic musical collaboration with ProMusica Chamber Orchestra. All are invited to delight in the rich, luxurious sounds of ProMusica and the powerful choral voices of CGMC in this one-of-a-kind venue. “We are delighted to perform with this phenomenal ensemble of musicians for one special night at the Southern Theatre. The concert will present a unique opportunity for our members to sing a full concert of classical music and collaborate with another extraordinary arts organization,” said Matthew Arnold, executive director of CGMC. CGMC and ProMusica will treat

its audience to such compilations as Lay of the Land, The Lord is My Shepherd, Testament of Freedom, and much more. CGMC will offer a sample of a capella arrangements, and ProMusica musicians will perform Bach’s Brandenburg Concerto No. 5, which will also be featured at their Baroque for the Ages Chamber Music Se-

ries the following evening. “ProMusica is honored to collaborate with the Columbus Gay Men’s Chorus. We have built a wonderful relationship with them from our previous performances together, and continue to admire the spirit and talent of this great group. We are very excited for the opportunity to join

forces again in presenting this program that will offer our audiences and community the enjoyment of creative collaborations of the highest artistic caliber,” said Janet Chen, executive director of ProMusica. This performance will only take place for one night, and CGMC and ProMusica expect a sold-out venue. Strings Attached: When: Friday, March 14 at 8p Where: Southern Theatre, 21 E. Main St., Columbus Tickets: Ticket prices: $20-$35. Available at www.cgmc.com and 614.228.CGMC

JUDY SHEPARD OF THE MATTHEW SHEPARD FOUNDATION TO SPEAK IN CLEVELAND On behalf of the children and the future of Ohio, The Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender Community Center of Greater Cleveland presents renowned advocate and mother, Judy Shepard as keynote speaker for the Center’s Metro Youth Outreach Anniversary Reception Friday, April 4th at the Ritz Carlton Silver Grille. This reception is from 7pm-10pm is free and open to the public. The reception will highlight the first year discoveries and work of the LGBT Center’s Metro Youth Outreach program for at-risk and homeless youth. Also, on store for the evening will be the premiere of their documentary, “While We Sleep”, highlighting the community’s cooperation and the youth served by MYO. “While we bring the community together to address homelessness in our area’s youth and shine light

on the preponderance of gay homeless youth, it’s important to see this as part of a whole society problem. Judy Shepard gives both the personal and national perspective,” said Mika Major, Project Coordinator for Metro Youth Outreach. In October 1998, Judy and Dennis Shepard lost their 21 year-old son, Matthew, to a murder motivated by antigay hate. Matthew’s death moved many thousands of people around the world to attend vigils and rallies in his memory. Determined to prevent others from suffering their

son’s fate, Judy and Dennis decided to turn their grief into action and established the Matthew Shepard Foundation to carry on Matthew’s legacy. The Foundation is dedicated to working toward the causes championed by Matthew during his life: social justice, diversity awareness & education, and equality for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people. The documentary, “While We Sleep” highlights the efforts, the need and the collaboration efforts by the Cleveland community to

address at-risk and homeless youth. Directed by Gina Brinker of Pigs Fly Films, a Cleveland-based independent video production company, “While We Sleep” is to demonstrate the why and how to address the needs and eliminate the barriers so youth have options to being homeless. “We want this documentary to be of use and encourage other communities to take on this issue.” says Ms. Brinker, concluding, “if almost half of homeless kids identify as LGBT then those organizations should take the lead.” Founded in 1975, the Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender Community Center of Greater Cleveland is a community-based non-profit agency working toward a society free of homophobia and gender oppression by advancing the respect, human rights and dignity of the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender communities.

COLUMBUS NEXT MEETING: APR 9, 6P-8P; LOCATION: WHOLE FOODS MARKET (3670 W DUBLIN GRANVILLE RD) ; EARTH DAY / GREEN BUSINESS WWW.NETWORKCOLUMBUS.COM

MAR 13 - MAR 19 2008


OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 31

fin

THE LAST WORD by Mickey Weems

William Buckley: The Queen Is Dead Was William Buckley, famous right-wing pundit, a homo? I don’t know, neither do I care. What I do know is that he got really mad at flaming liberal Gore Vidal in 1968, so mad that he called Vidal a “queer” on national television. I looked at a recording of the incident to see for myself what the ruckus was all about. Let me tell you: whatever his sexual orientation may have been, William Buckley talked and gestured like a big old fag. Buckley and Vidal were engaged in a televised debate, discussing the unrest that occurred during the 1968 Democratic Convention. Buckley blamed it on the unruly protesters. Vidal said the cops who beat the protesters overreacted. They began squabbling with each other. Buckley compared the protesters to Nazis. Without a hint of anger, Vidal said, “As far as I’m concerned, the only pro- or crypto-Nazi I can think of is yourself.” Buckley responded with all the fury of Joan Crawford: “Now, listen you queeer, stop calling me a crypto-Nazi or I’ll sssock you in the goddam face and you’ll ssssstay plastered!” Since Buckley’s death, this quote has been brought up by both conservatives and liberals, either showing what a real man Buckley was, or using it to illustrate his homophobic tendencies. When you actually hear what he said instead of reading it, however, he’s about as masculine as a man-purse. He sounds like Michelangelo Signorile throwing a hissy-fit. Actually, he makes Michelangelo sound

masculine (if such a thing is possible) in comparison. When Buckley opened his mouth, even in anger, daisies fell out. Vidal looked and sounded a hell of a lot more butch than Buckletta in that debate. It’s not like Vidalia was terribly masculine herself, hence the bizarre spectacle of Sweet William calling fabulously-Gay Gore Vidal a “queer.” During Buckley’s tantrum, Vidal was smiling, perhaps enjoying the fact that Buckley had lost his signature cool. Perhaps because Buckley sounded like such a Nancy-boy. Instead of “crypto-Nazi,” Vidal should have called him a “crypto-queer.” I’m sure it wouldn’t be the first time Buckley had been called the equivalent of a fairy.

als and nobody would say a thing about it. A right-wing Gay-basher, intellectual or otherwise, couldn’t possibly be crypto-homosexual! Isn’t that right, Mark Foley, Jeff Gannon, Larry Craig, Ted Haggard, etc. etc. etc.? Buckley’s powerful combination of slick rhetorical skills, shortsighted right-wing politics and verbal limp-wristed swishing were employed to support some pretty disastrous people and policies, such as ethically-deficient Ronald Reagan, and anti-Gay legislature sponsored by Buckley’s beloved Roman Catholic Church (no Gays in that organization, nosirrreee!). Buckley also lacked sufficient moral fiber to openly denounce his most uncouth fan, Rush Limbaugh.

Outing William Buckley William Buckley was the faggiest conservative this side of the Log Cabin Republicans. His opposition to Gay rights while constantly talking like a fudge-packer is right up there with Rush “Oxy” Limbaugh’s condemnation of illegal drug users. Except that Rush actually was doing drugs illegally, and Buckley only sounded like a pansy, so far as we know. Everyone talks about how Buckley brought intelligence to the conservative movement. If intelligence were measured by elitist vocabulary, then yes, indeed he did. In addition to speaking fluent crypto-English, Buckley’s saucy mannerisms brought a degree of camp, one of our most powerful verbal weapons, and he used it against us. Because he was against Gay rights, he could out-queen any pinko-liber-

Buckley as tragic I must say this for Buckley: Rush isn’t half the man that William was. For all of his faults, Buckley wasn’t stupid or so obviously bought and paid for. For the most part, Buckley was civil and witty, a truly noble queen. Most intelligent people hold views that are a mixture of both liberal and conservative values. William Buckley did display a degree of wisdom and integrity that occasionally put him left of center. He argued against two current wars: the one on drugs and the one in Iraq. And, in a rather back-handed argument concerning Lawrence vs. the State of Texas, he said that the repeal of anti-sodomy laws was perhaps a good thing. But by that time, he had been replaced by louder, meaner, Straighter voices.

Now William Buckley is dead. Rush Limbaugh, Anne Coulter, and a host of other ne’er-dowells claim to be his legacy. May God forgive him.

HOROSCOPES by Jack Fertig

ARIES (Mar 20 - Apr 19): Clean out your kitchen and get rid of at least a few things that aren’t good for you. Some comfort foods are necessary, but whole grains can fit in that category as well as the sweet stuff!

CANCER (Jun 21 - Jul 22): Trying to bring diverse viewpoints together in harmony is likely to backfire. Agreeing to disagree - finding a critical, if minuscule, common ground without requiring too much unity - is ultimately more helpful. A new exercise program will improve your spirits as much as your bod.

LIBRA (Sep 23 - Oct 22): Your eagerness to work is commendable, but the balance between multitasking and focusing on priorities can make a hash of it. Don’t be scared to ask the boss or an authoritative expert for help!

CAPRICORN (Dec 21 - Jan 19): Your very definite critical ideas are having some trouble getting through a gentle, eager-toplease mode of expression. The solution can be found in your desire to want what’s really best for someone else - which may not be what sounds nicest.

TAURUS (Apr 20 - May 20): Too many dreamy ideals can leave you paralyzed. Creative action in the real world can help you pick the most advantageous path out of the many. Talking it over with a sister genetic or otherwise - will help you to energize and focus.

LEO (Jul 23 - Aug 22): Erotic ideals and critical values are likely to clash. Meditation and exercise will help you restore harmony. If you’re not much for exercise, dancing - alone, with a partner, or in a group - will help you find reconciliation.

SCORPIO (Oct 23 - Nov 21): Don’t let fear of criticism inhibit your creative urges. Still, exercising some critical foresight can help you focus your magic into making something truly wonderful. Ancient and distant struggles can help inspire you.

AQUARIUS (Jan 20 - Feb 18): Erotic frustrations shouldn’t provoke you to try to prove anything. Divert your attention to work and home for now, and sex will fall into its right place at the right time. Financial offers that look too good to be true probably are.

GEMINI (May 21 - Jun 20): Money is coming and going a bit too easily. Wanting to look good can aggravate the spending. Staying close to the discipline of earlier times - even earlier generations - will help you to save money and use it wisely.

VIRGO (Aug 23 - Sep 22): Elevating anyone at your own expense is never good, and it’s an especially poor way to handle a relationship. Idealizing your lover - rather than simply seeing the two of you as flawed, equal individuals together - is always a big mistake. Blowing off steam with friends will help restore balance.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov 22 - Dec 20): Home may be too tempting a retreat from hard work and responsibility. Traditional or old family ideals may be the goad you need to get cracking! A sense of accomplishment to make the folks at home proud can also help motivate you.

PISCES (Feb 19 - Mar 19): Just when you’re feeling utterly fabulous, your partner seems intent on bringing you down. The opposing view may be more realistic, but so what if it is? Rough, passionate play or some dark fantasy may help reconciliation.

Jack Fertig, a professional astrologer since 1977, is a founding member of the Association for Astrological Networking. He can be reached for consultations at 415.864.8302, www.starjack.com, and by e-mail at QScopes@qsyndicate.com.

MAR 13 - MAR 19 2008



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