05.15.08 Outlook Weekly - Serving in Silence: DADT

15 Y MA

6 O4 N 2 L1 O V • 8 00 2 1, 2 AY M -

THE NEW B ’T T E OMA • DON’T ASK DON

UEZ G I R I ROD A J • L L

2 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY OWNERS AND PUBLISHERS Michael Daniels & Chris Hayes EDITOR-IN-CHIEF / ART DIRECTOR Chris Hayes hayes@outlookmedia.com

SNAPSHOT

Saturday, May 10 was Columbus AIDS Task Force's Art for Life 2008. The City Center was transformed into a dance hall and art gallery for the charity auction by Zen Genius. Patrons packed the house buying up all the donated art they could get their hands on. Both the silent and live auction proceeds allow Columbus AIDS Task Force to continue its efforts in the areas of prevention, outreach and education.

ASSISTANT ART DIRECTOR / PHOTOS Robert Trautman traut@outlookmedia.com CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Mette Bach, Danielle Buckius, Wayne R Besen, Chris Crain, Jennifer Vanasco, Tom Moon, Regina Sewell, Leslie Robinson, Gregg Shapiro, Mick Weems, Julianne French, TF Barton, Romeo San Vicente, Jeff Fertig, Simon Sheppard, Tristan Taormino, Dennis Vanke, Mario Pinardi, Rick Kramer, Aaron Drake, Jennie Keplar, Scott Varner, Derrik Chinn, Dan Savage, Felice Newman, Tim Curran, Chris Hughes, Stephen J Fallon, Felice Newman, J. Eric Peters, Crystal Hawkins, Brent Wilder, Matthew Burlingame, Jacob Anderson-Minshall, Matthew Veritas Tsien, Cheri Meyers

BUSINESS & ADVERTISING DIRECTOR Michael Daniels mdaniels@outlookmedia.com NATIONAL ADVERTISING Rivendell Media - 212.242.6863 ADVERTISING DEADLINE Each Wednesday 8 days prior to publication.

Call us at 614.268.8525.

HOW TO REACH US Outlook Media, Inc. 815 N High St, Suite ii Columbus, OH 43215 614.268.8525 phone 614.261.8200 fax www.outlookweekly.net web www.outlookmedia.com business www.myspace.com/outlookweekly friends www.flickr.com/outlookweekly photos SUBSCRIPTIONS Call 614.268.8525

READERSHIP: 210,000 PEOPLE / MONTH

Stonewall Democrats, along with candidates and elected officials who support them, gathered at East Village for their annual Wine Tasting event May 5. Rajesh Lahoti and Ray Brown were recognized for their community service, and Secretary of State Jennifer Brunner addressed the crowd. Photos by Robbie Daniels.

Outlook Media, Inc. does not investigate or accept responsibility for claims made in any advertisement. Outlook Media, Inc. assumes no responsibility for claims arising in connection with products and services advertised herein, nor for the content of, or reply to, any advertisement.

SNAPSHOT . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .........2 ABOUT TOWN . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .........3 COMMENTARY . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .........4 COMMUNITY CORNER . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .........6 TRANSNATION . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .........8 EXAMINED LIFE . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .........8 OUT BUSINESS NEWS . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......11 STRAIGHT UP . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......13 TRAVEL . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......15 FEATURE: ARMED FORCES/DADT .. . . . . . . . . . .16-22 DEEP INSIDE HOLLYWOOD . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......24 ARTS . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......24 CLASSIFIEDS . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......25 INTERVIEW: JAI RODRIGUEZ . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......27 SAVAGE LOVE . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......29 SPOTLIGHT . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......30 THE LAST WORD . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......31 SCOPES . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .......31

All material is copyrighted ©2008 by Outlook Media, Inc. All rights reserved.

NEXT WEEK: FESTIVAL PREVIEW

Outlook Weekly is published and distributed by Outlook Media, Inc. every Thursday throughout Ohio.

Outlook Weekly is a free publication provided solely for the use of our readers. Any person who willfully or knowingly obtains or exerts unauthorized control over copies of Outlook Weekly with the intent to prevent other individuals from reading it shall be considered guilty of the crime of theft. Violators will be prosecuted.

The views expressed in Outlook Weekly are those of the individual authors and do not necessarily reflect the views, policies, or personal, business, or professional practices of Outlook Media, Inc. or its staff, ownership, or management.

Outlook Weekly does not guarantee the accuracy, completeness or reliability of any interpretation, advice, opinion, or view presented.

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008 VOLUME 12 NUMBER 46

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 3

ABOUT TOWN

by Chris Hayes WEDNESDAY, MAY 14 IT’S ALL IN WHO YOU KNOW Network Columbus @ BOMA , 583 E Broad St, 614.233.3000, barofmodernart.com, networkcolumbus.com: Outlook presents Network Columbus, a chamber of commerce for gay-owned and allied companies and gay and allied business professionals offering networking events, educational programs, business advocacy and linkages with other business and professional organizations to lead and support economic growth within the central Ohio gay community. This month’s Speaker is Kelly Austin (Sandler Sales Institute). Relaxed business atmosphere, lots of prizes and free food. Come and network already! 6p-8p; free.

THURSDAY, MAY 15 SHOP TILL YOU DROP SN3TH @ various shops in The Short North, www.shortnorth.org: Starting today, more than 40 of your favorite shops will be open late every third Thursday of the month. Make a date. Start with happy hour, then stroll the strip, shop the shops and finish with a great dinner. Special sales, music, fashion, prizes and surprises. Till 9p; free.

BIG TOPS Ringling Bros And Barnum & Bailey’s Bellobration @ Nationwide Arena, corner of Nationwide and Neil, 614.246.2000, www.NationwideArena.com: An interactive and high-energy circus extravaganza filled with jaw-dropping stunts, high wire high jinx, adrenaline-pounding trapeze and amazing animals. Arrive one hour before show time for the interactive All Access Pre-show to learn circus skills, become CircusFit®, meet Ringling Bros. performers and get an up-close look at the animal stars of The Greatest Show On Earth –and is FREE to all ticket holders. Thu & Fri 7:30p; Sat 11:30a, 3:30p, 7:30p, Sun 1p; $10$65.

FRIDAY, MAY 16 LAWN JOCKEYS Grand Opening Party @ Tavern on the Lawn, 340 Greenlawn Ave, 614.444.9000, www.tavernonthelawn.com: Jill McDonald opens her new tavern on the South Side tonight. Head in to see the new place, eat some food, drink some drinks and have some fun. Hang by the fireplace, or play darts or ski ball in the upper deck. 7p; free.

WOMEN POWER The Spirit of Women @First Unitarian Universalist Church, 93 W Weisheimer Rd: The Columbus Women’s Chorus presents their spring program, “The Spirit of Women” tonight and tomorrow at 8p. See page 30 for more info.

OLD IS COOL Antiques and Gardening at Bryn Du @ Bryn Du Mansion in Granville, www.bryndu.com: Bryn Du Mansion will be the site of the second annual “Antiques and Gardening at Bryn Du” this weekend of May 16-18. See page 30 for more info.

SATURDAY, MAY 17 ARE YOU MY MOTHER? 3rd Annual Forever Home Adoption Celebration @ COSI, 333 W Broad St, 614.228.COSI, at www.ncalp.org: As the only event of its kind in Central Ohio, Forever Home brings together families and adoption professionals to increase public awareness of adoption. Right now, thousands of children across the country - over 3,000 children in foster care in Ohio alone - wait for families to adopt them. This annual event is an ideal opportunity to promote, learn,

and inform about adoption. Adoption resources, cool activities, entertainment, and prizes galore! 1:30p4p; $15 adults/$5 kids (includes all day admission to COSI)!

WHILE YOU WERE OUT 19th Annual BIA Showcase of Remodeled Homes @ various locations, 614.891.0575, biahomebuilders.com: In its 19th year, the BIA Showcase of Remodeled Homes will highlight 17 unique remodeling projects in the central Ohio area. Projects range from whole house renovations to upgrades such as kitchens, bathrooms and master suites. The homes are located in Clintonville (one home), Dublin (four homes), Hilliard (one home), Lewis Center (one home), Powell (two homes), Upper Arlington (three homes), Westerville (two homes) and Worthington (three homes). 11a-6p; $3-$10.

FOOD FOR FUN North Market’s12th Annual Apron Gala @ North Market, 59 Spruce St, 614.463.9664, northmarket.org: Are you ready for Columbus’ favorite foodie party? Iron-up your finest apron or better yet, make one just for the occasion…the 12th Annual North Market Apron Gala! Attendees enjoy an exclusive glimpse of the North Market in this after-hours affair where they are invited to meander around the market and enjoy an abundant array of specialty appetizer, entree and dessert samples representing the specialties of each North Market merchant. 7p-10p; $75.

SEXUALITY IS FLUID Grand Opening Night @ Liquid, 1100 N High St, 614.298.3000, www.liquidhotspot.com: The new cafe, lounge and weekend dance club located in the Short North opens to the public. The party will feature complimentary hors d’oeuvres, specialty drinks, professional dancers and live DJ entertainment. See page 30 for more info. 7p; free.

SEXUALITY IS FLUID Karaoke @ The East Village, 630 N High St, 614.228.3546, columbusnightlife.com: The Stonewall Diversity Team is bringing to you Karaoke.

Come and sing your favorite tune. You may even catch some of the Stonewall Board and committee members holding a mic under the bright lights and singing their hearts out! Everyone is welcome! Bring all your friends. 10p; free.

PASS ME A SUNKIST Good Vibrations @ Shadowbox Cabaret, Easton Towne Center, 614.416.7625, shadowboxcabaret.com: Can’t find a date to the Prom? Nowhere to go on Spring Break? Sick of wedding after wedding that’s not yours? Come celebrate Spring Shadowbox style with the brand new show Good Vibrations featuring all new sketches penned by the Shadowbox comedy writing team. Fresh, fastpaced and fun. Through June 7. Thu 7:30p, Fri&Sat 7:30p&10:30p; $20-$30.

SUNDAY, MAY 18 BUT I’M AN ACTRESS! Emerald City Players Auditions @ the Emerald City Theater, 6799 Dublin Center Dr, in the Dublin Village Shopping Center, 614.470.1525: Emerald City Players will be holding auditions for Ladies at the Alamo

by Paul Zindel with Director Brian Cheslik. Seeking women ages 30 to 60. Performance Dates are July 11 - July 26. Audition will be reading from the script.

Bring Headshot and Resume. Tonight and tomorrow.

7p; free.

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

The Reader Poll

4 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

COMMENTARY

by David Benkof

Last week we asked:

Do you or have you served in the military?

YES 7% NO 93%

Spelling “military inclusion”

If so, were you open about your sexuality?

YES 0% NO 75% SORT of 25%

without the T Should gay-rights advances be put on hold until all LGBT people can be included?

On this question, the position held by the most prominent voices in the gay community is so inconsistent it borders on incoherent.

Last year, most leading gay-rights organizations rejected the advice of congressional experts including Rep. Barney Frank (DMass.) and pushed for an unlikely-to-pass version of the Employment Non-Discrimination Act (ENDA) that included gender identity. When the broader bill was replaced with an ENDA that covered only sexual orientation, hundreds of gay and lesbian groups lobbied Congress to vote “no” on what was the most important piece of gay-rights legislation in a decade. Indeed, seven Democrats who had previously been reliable votes for pro-gay bills opposed ENDA because it did not include protections for transgender people.

LGBT activists defended this stance in a variety of ways, but the basic argument was that no part of the community should gain civil rights at the expense of other parts. Of course, had that been the approach of voting-rights activists after the Civil War, African-Americans would have forfeited the vote until women gained suffrage a halfcentury later - and they, in turn, may have been asked to wait for the passage of the Voting Rights Act of 1965 before gaining the

right to vote. In any event, supporters of what became known as “United ENDA” characterized their position as a principled one, believing that LGB rights without T rights were worse than no rights at all, and that (Evita show tune be damned) politics is not “the art of the possible.”

This pose is simply unsustainable, as an examination of transgender military inclusion shows.

The Web sites of the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force; the Human Rights Campaign; Parents, Friends, and Families of Lesbians and Gays; and many other groups advocate for an ENDA that includes gender identity. But the T is glaringly missing when it comes to military issues. These organizations push for gays, lesbians, and bisexuals to serve openly in the armed forced, but don’t lobby on behalf of transgender people who want to serve their country. And they certainly don’t insist that any repeal of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” (DADT) be linked to equality for transgender servicemembers.

There are only three ways LGBT organizations can react to this imbalance with any sort of integrity: One, they could refuse to support the repeal of DADT unless it is accompanied by a new policy that prohibits the military from discriminating on the basis of gender identity.

Two, they could admit that their ENDA strategy was wrong and agree to accept an LGB-only workplace bill until such time as the votes are there to pass a more inclusive ENDA. Three, they could articulate publicly and precisely why discrimination against transgender people in the military is more legitimate than private-sector discrimination against them - and why it is more legitimate than discrimination against lesbians, gay men, and bisexuals in the military.

I would certainly prefer the second solution. But I could respect the other two approaches. My hunch, though, is that none of these stances will be adopted. The status quo is strong evidence that the “United ENDA” stance is not primarily about political principles. It’s about the internal power dynamics in the LGBT community, which have caused gay leaders to draw the line at an inclusive ENDA. No such mobilization has taken place over transgender people in military, so there has been no perceived need for an ultimatum on that issue. Yet. David Benkof was a longtime gay columnist, historian, and entrepreneur (as David Bianco). He is openly bisexual, but as an Orthodox Jew he is guided by Jewish law in the areas of sexuality and family life. He can be reached at DavidBenkof@aol.com.

Explain.

How did you handled your sexuality while serving.

I was not out yet.

Just have to lie about your sexuality and yourself.

I'm one very big on Integrity, but I also risk my career and also the lives of my peers for not being there if I would be open due to risk of discharge.

Have to make up stories about your personal life, because everyone knows everyones business...the people you fight with are like your brothers.

Were you released for being queer?

YES 33% NO 66%

NEXT WEEK’S QUESTION:

What’s your favorite fair food ?

Log on to: www.outlookweekly.net to take this week’s poll.

28% SO U RC

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

E : CNN/GALL U

P

CATEGORY

NOV 2 ’04

MAY 12 ’08

DIFFERENCE

AMERICAN DEAD

1,122

4,073

2,951

AMERICAN WOUNDED

8,124

30,004

21,880

IRAQI CIVILIAN DEAD

16,342

91,040

NATIONAL DEBT

$7,429,629,954,236

$9,359,720,592,641

DAYS ‘TIL 2008 ELECTION

1,463

176

74,698 $1,930,090,638,405 (1,287)

OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 5

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

6 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

COMMUNITY CORNER

QUALIA 2008: LOCATION, LOCATION, LOCATION! Qualia would like to thank The Center on High (Stonewall), Axis, East Village, and Union Bar and Food for hosting Qualia 2008.

This is the second year that Stonewall has been the site of the Qualia Conference on Gay Folklife. The conference attracted people from Toronto, Utah, and Newfoundland (and a groundhog that came scratching at the door for some reason!) as well as Ohio and neighboring states. Burritos donated by Chipotlé were served to the delight of all.

Axis donated all of the door from Friday night and half the door Saturday night to BRAVO (Buckeye Region Anti-Violence Organization). East Village hosted the IDKE (International Drag King Extravaganza) with Fo Dem Ladeez on Friday, and the fundraiser with Jenn Litt, Cindy Wolfe, and various artists for Katie Reider. Union Bar and Food had the brunch on Sunday with their delicious buffet and omelet chef.

Qualia thanks Suzie Simpson, Scott Nusbaum, Robert Younkman, Jenine Meisner, Kelli Evans, and Christine Hoppe for their support.

MILITARY CONTINUES RECRUITING SERIOUS EX-FELONS WHILE DISCHARGING QUALIFIED GAY SERVICE MEMBERS New Data Shows Growing Number of Sexual Offenders, Kidnappers and Arsonists Allowed to Serve The House Oversight and Government Reform Committee released data showing a dramatic rise in the number of moral waivers issued to recruits joining the Army and Marine Corps.

The number of waivers granted to recruits convicted of manslaughter, rape, kidnapping and making terrorist threats, doubled between 2006 and 2007. During that same time, the Pentagon continued discharging service members under the “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” law banning lesbian, gay and bisexual personnel from serving openly in the military. Pentagon officials released the data following a request for the information from Committee Chairman, Congressman Henry A. Waxman (D-CA).

“This data shines a bright light on the outrageousness and absurdity of ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,’” said Aubrey Sarvis, executive director of Servicemembers Legal Defense Network (SLDN).

“On the one hand, the Pentagon is discharging highly-qualified, honest, law-abiding men and women because they are gay, while on the other hand granting waivers to rapists, killers, kidnappers and terrorists. Granting waivers for child molesters and rapists to serve while discharging lesbians and gays is utter madness. Repealing ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ will reduce the need to grant felony waivers.”

In 2006 the Pentagon discharged approximately 700 service members under “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.” According to the Department of Defense data, in 2007 the Army granted 511 felony waivers, including: three soldiers convicted of manslaughter, one soldier convicted of kidnapping or abduction, seven soldiers convicted of rape, sexual assault, criminal sexual assault, incest or other sex crimes, three soldiers convicted of indecent acts or liberties with a child, and three soldiers convicted of terrorist threats including bomb threats. Moral waivers are granted to personnel who do not otherwise qualify for military service due to a criminal background.

“Keeping ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ on the books hardly helps the MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

military’s personnel crisis. In fact, if Congress got rid of the law there would be a need for fewer waivers,” Sarvis said. “It is in our national security interests to get rid of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.”

To see the Department of Defense data on felony waivers, visit oversight.house.gov and for more information on “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,” and Congressional legislation to repeal the law, visit www.sldn.org.

FORMER REAGAN ASSISTANT SECRETARY OF DEFENSE CALLS FOR REPEAL OF “DON’T ASK, DON’T TELL’ Lawrence J. Korb, Former Assistant Secretary of Defense under President Ronald Reagan, urged Congress to repeal the “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” law banning lesbian, gay and bisexual personnel from serving openly in the military. Korb urged Congress to “get rid of outmoded social restrictions,” such as “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell,” and in written testimony called the ban on openly gay service members, “counterproductive to military readiness.” His remarks came before a joint hearing of the House Armed Services Air and Land Forces Subcommittee and the House Armed Services Readiness Subcommittee. The hearing was held to discuss the issue of readiness decline among our nation’s ground forces.

“First, repeal the ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ policy,” Korb said.

“The Army and Marine Corps cannot afford to place unnecessary obstacles in the way of qualified men and women who want to serve.” He went on to note that “over the past 10 years more than 10,000 personnel have been discharged as a result of this policy, including 800 with skills deemed ‘mission critical,’ such as pilots, combat engineers, and linguists. These are the very job functions for which the military has experienced personnel shortfalls.”

“Mr. Korb’s remarks are a reminder that many leaders within the defense community support repeal of ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,’” said Aubrey Sarvis, executive director of Servicemembers Legal Defense Network (SLDN). “As he rightly pointed out, there is growing concern among the national security establishment that ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ forces our military to dismiss talented troops at a time when we are struggling to recruit and retain service members. Mr. Korb should be applauded for his willingness to advance the national conversation about this issue and for suggesting common sense ways Congress can act to address our readiness shortfalls.”

“I have always admired Dr. Korb and I am glad that he has added his voice to the chorus of experts, military officials, and fair-minded citizens interested in bringing necessary equality to the military by eliminating the ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ policy,” said Rep. Ellen Tauscher, lead sponsor of the Military Readiness Enhancement Act (H.R. 1246), the bill to repeal “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.” “We also received testimony today that speaks to the damage this policy can do to an already wounded state of military readiness. Hopefully this testimony will prompt many more of my colleagues to sign on to my bill and we can begin to see a change in this policy.”

Former Assistant Secretary of Defense for Manpower, Reserve Affairs, Installations and Logistics (1981- 1985) Lawrence J. Korb currently serves as Senior Fellow at the Center for American Progress and a Senior Adviser to the Center for Defense Information. Prior to that, he was a Senior Fellow and Director of National Security Studies at the Council on Foreign Relations and, before that, Director of the Center for Public Policy Educa-

tion and Senior Fellow in the Foreign Policy Studies Program at the Brookings Institution. For his service as Assistant Secretary Korb was awarded the Department of Defense’s medal for Distinguished Public Service. Mr. Korb is a member of the SLDN Military Advisory Council and also served four years as an active duty Naval Flight Officer, before retiring from the Naval Reserve having attained the rank of Captain.

“More and more leaders within the defense community are reevaluating the effectiveness of this law and concluding that it is counter-productive to America’s national security interests. I hope Congress listens to Mr. Korb and moves to repeal ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,’” said Sarvis.

To read Lawrence Korb’s testimony in its entirety, visit www.americanprogress.org and for more information on “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,” and Congressional legislation to repeal the law, visit www.sldn.org.

CHAIRMAN OF THE JOINT CHIEFS TELLS CADETS MILITARY READY TO ACCEPT GAY SERVICE MEMBERS Mullen says “[Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell] is a law and we follow it.

Should the law change, the military will carry that out too.”

Speaking at West Point on Sunday, Admiral Mike Mullen, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, told graduating cadets that Congress, and not the military, is responsible for the “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” law banning openly lesbian, gay and bisexual Americans from military service. Admiral Mullen’s answer came in response to a cadet’s question asking what would happen if the next administration were supportive of legislation allowing gays to serve openly.

“Admiral Mullen is to be applauded for his willingness to take part in an open national conversation about this issue, and for his open-minded approach to working with Congress as they consider the future of ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,’” said Aubrey Sarvis, executive director for Servicemembers Legal Defense Network (SLDN). “Admiral Mullen’s remarks reflect an attitude shift among the military establishment which has historically discouraged public debate on allowing open lesbian and gay Americans to serve. As Admiral Mullen rightly points out, ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ is a federal law. Ultimately repeal must come from the people’s representatives in Congress.”

During his senate confirmation hearing last year, Mullen told lawmakers that, “I really think it is for the American people to come forward, really through this body, to both debate that policy and make changes, if that’s appropriate.” He went on to say that, “I’d love to have Congress make its own decisions” with respect to considering repeal.

The Military Readiness Enhancement Act (H.R. 1246), a bill to lift the ban on open service, is now supported by 142 bi-partisan lawmakers in the House of Representatives. Congresswoman Susan Davis (D-CA), chair of the House Armed Services Subcommittee on Military Personnel has announced her desire to hold a hearing this year on the “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy.

“Poll after poll show that a majority of the American people, as well as military personnel, believe ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ is a counterproductive law which should be repealed. With the support and encouragement of Admiral Mullen, we hope the next Congress will act to repeal this inefficient and discriminatory law,” said Sarvis.

For more information on “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,” and Congressional legislation to repeal the law, visit www.sldn.org.

OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 7

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

8 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

TRANSNATION

by Jacob Anderson-Minshall

THE DISAPPEARANCE Heather Alexander’s fans believed in magic. They flocked to Renaissance Fairs, sci/fi fantasy conventions, and filk (internet folk music) concerts to hear Alexander’s Celtic-inspired tunes. Her cult following represented communities steeped in fantasy, magic and lore. But in the winter of 2006, even Alexander’s fans couldn’t believe their eyes.

That November, after playing a concert, Heather Alexander walked through a gate on stage and disappeared. She was, quite literally, never seen again.

The following spring, word surfaced that Alexander had designated an “heir” to carry on her musical heritage. Alexander James Adams, baring a subtle resemblance to Alexander, debuted with a crackling voice and intimate knowledge of her musical library.

“I call myself the Heir,” Adams explains, “because…I was inheriting all of Heather Alexander’s music and her magic and her world. The title was to let people know I was…Heather’s chosen one. Because nobody knew at first what was going on.”

After Heather Alexander’s disappearance, Adams spent four months in isolation before emerging a new man. Billing himself as the Fairy Tale Minstrel and identifying as FTM, Adams now recognizes the fable he created of his own life. “I made a fairy tale girl. That’s who I was.”

OF

Terrified transition would cost him his male fans, Adams is happy to report, “I’ve been surprised: I lost very few. Guys were actually very game to take me on as their little brother and show me the ropes.

They’re getting great glee out of telling me how to behave.”

In part, Adams credits that reception to a rich storytelling heritage and the unique way he describes his female-tomale experience.

“In Irish Celtic stories there’s a fairytale line of the fae. They steal infant children and they leave their own kind in place. Heather was a changeling…a fairy-child. I was a stolen child…[who] lived in fairyland for 44 years.

Now I’m here in the mortal world…becoming a real boy.”

The acceptance he’s experienced has deepened Adams’ faith in mankind and magic. “It’s impressed me…how kind and supporting humanity can be. As Heather, I always believed in dreams and fairytales and magic, but when I

HEATHER ALEXANDER had to put it to practice for myself I wasn’t actually sure if it was real. And everyone else has proven that it is.”

With a musical career spanning two decades and over a dozen albums as Heather Alexander, Adams is one of the most accomplished musicians to transition mid-career. For female-born singers, hormone treatments can be particularly risky, because testosterone thickens vocal cords, lowers pitch and limits range in a singer’s voice.

Even with intensive training, there’s no guarantee that a singer’s success will survive.

“I was really, really worried,” Adams admits. His concerns led him to record a number of tracks and a full range of vowel sounds in his female voice, before beginning testosterone. Happy with his post-transition voice, Adams married it with those recordings to create the unique duets of Winter Tide,

the self-described pagan’s 2007 Christmas album.

“I went back and I listened to the tracks and I broke into tears,” Adams acknowledges. “It wasn’t a sadness, it was…the huge awesomeness of these two spirits that I’ve been living with all these years [finally] united in a harmony.”

Although groomed for Nashville at a young age, Adams jokes, “I was writing…songs I felt only my stuffed animals would listen to…about rainbows…and castles and magic and elves.”

Adams found a receptive audience in the musical genre filk, which he sees as reflecting both “wild crazy things out there on the Internet,” and “the old system of entertaining without having a television or a radio.”

Adams hopes his personal story inspires others to “look at the mirror and say, maybe. When we stop saying maybes we just start dying. Each of us is a magical creature. Each of us has all that we need—we just need to believe that. It’s never easily done. But if you want to be a hero that’s what you have to do; you just have to believe.”

Trans author Jacob Anderson-Minshall co-authors the Blind Eye mystery series with his wife, Diane. © 2008 Jacob Anderson-Minshall

THE EXAMINED LIFE

Disabling Your Butt Kicking Machine

by Tom Moon, MFT

Eckhart Tolle, in his modern classic, The Power of Now, writes: “You have probably come across ‘mad’ people in the street incessantly talking or muttering to themselves. Well, that’s not much different from what you and all other ‘normal’ people do, except that you don’t do it out loud. The voice comments, speculates, judges, compares, complains, likes, dislikes, and so on...It is not uncommon for the voice to be a person’s own worst enemy. Many people live with a tormentor in their head that continuously attacks and punishes them and drains them of vital energy. It is the cause of untold misery and unhappiness, as well as of disease.”

I wonder if anyone reading can’t recognize this critical, sometimes tormenting voice in their personal experience. Virtually everybody in our culture seems to have an “inner critic” which relentlessly evaluates their performance in the tasks of life, and consistently finds it deficient. In my experience, the attacks of this inner critic, or, as one of my clients referred to it recently, “my butt kicking machine,” contribute to a myriad of problems – anxiety and depression, dissatisfaction and despair, addictions and compulsions, and on and on.

Is harsh self judgment more of a problem for gay than straight people? My own impression is no – intense self-criticism is ubiquitous in Ameri-

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

can culture – but it may be that there is a recognizable gay “flavor” to our inner critics. My impression is that, for us, the inner critic often speaks in the language of internalized homophobia. Even for those of us who have long ago come to terms with our sexual orientation, for instance, the voice often tells us that we’re unlovable or unworthy of respect because we’re “less than” or “out of step” with others.

What do we do about it? The first step in getting free of the inner critic is to decide unequivocally that you’d be better off without it. A surprising number of people, when push comes to shove, really believe that they need their buttkicking machine in order to keep them on their toes. They believe that, without it, they’d be an undisciplined mess, without values, goals, or direction. They don’t start to make progress until they can entertain the possibility, even if only provisionally, that there are more effective motivations for personal success than self-directed contempt.

But once that is clear, the next step is to learn to treat the inner critic as just one of the many voices in our heads, having no privileged authority. Most people are so afraid of their butt-kicking machine that they cringe every time it issues one of its parental pronouncements, and are completely unable to be skeptical about what it says.

One way to overcome this awe of the critic is to sit down with pen and paper and make an inventory of your critic’s “top ten tunes” – its most common accusations (e.g. “You’re a loser,” “You’re lazy,” “People don’t like you,” etc.) People who do this exercise often find that it enables them, sometimes for the first time in their lives, to look critically at the critic. They begin to see how sweeping its judgments are; how often they’re based on childhood misperceptions rather than mature thinking; and how unforgiving and lacking in compassion the inner critic can be. They begin to understand that, even when it does identify real shortcomings, these can be dealt with in a far more effective way than through the critic’s assaults.

Once we’ve become more skeptical about the inner critic, it becomes possible to begin to talk back to it. You’ll probably find that, no matter how unreasonable your inventory has revealed the critic to be, it will continue to play its top ten tunes anyway, because one of its chief characteristics is its relentless irrationality. That’s why trying to reason with it generally has limited value.

But it can be very helpful to have a few responses, preferably humorous, ironic, or sarcastic, which you can use whenever it begins a tormenting tirade. (“I’m sorry; all our operators are busy right now. Please call back in a year or two.”) You

can have fun creating these responses; the point is to be constantly giving yourself the message that you don’t need to fear your inner critic, or to take its pronouncements as the voice of truth. Another helpful strategy is to practice deliberately sending yourself thoughts of compassion and kind wishes whenever the critic speaks up. (“May I be happy and peaceful. May I live in love. May I be successful,” etc.) Compassionate self regard is like a muscle. It strengthens with frequent use.

For that reason, deliberately sending messages of loving kindness to yourself is helpful even if you don’t immediately “feel” them. What matters is the intention to treat yourself with kindness and positive regard. When you deliberately act on that intention frequently, the feelings of self regard gradually grow.

It isn’t necessary for us to feel at the mercy of our inner lives. Your butt-kicking machine can feel fierce and formidable, but it’s really composed of nothing more substantial than thoughts, and none of us needs to feel helpless in relation to our thoughts.

Tom Moon is a psychotherapist in San Francisco. His website is tommoon.net.

OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 9

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

10 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 11

OUT BUSINESS NEWS

by Chris Hayes

ReBuild It & They Will Come Back…

Becky Gentile & The Bar of Modern Art

The Bar of Modern Art opened in 2007 to rave reviews and the promise of a modern, high-end club for everyone. A multi-million dollar renovation to an old church resulted in a 5-star restaurant, an art gallery, two dance floors, a VIP lounge, and expansive outdoor patio/bar and fire pits. BoMA was the antithesis of Columbus nightlife.

People were buzzing about it for months the Pop Rock martinis, the 6+ bars that were actually art installations by local artists, the incredible sound system, the food, the size, the glamour…and the attitude.

But neither size nor location ever completely determines a business’s success. If people like what you’re doing, they’ll come to you. And maybe that’s where BoMA had its biggest problem. As nice as the facility is, if people don’t feel comfortable, they won’t come back.

Run by a man who’s claim to fame was being a door man at Studio 54, this manager didn’t realize that the old school mentality of “choosing who you let in” went out with chrome and cocaine, and because of that, BoMA quickly got a reputation for being full of itself.

Now we all know in business that the first year is always the hardest, and BoMA has had some tough times; personnel at the top of that list.

One of the largest nightlife venues in town, the Bar of Modern Art also struggled to find a consistent and large enough crowd to fill the massive space. Talk changed in town from how great it was to if it might have bit off more than it could chew in a market that not only is always looking for the next best thing, but also appreciates the compactness of entertainment areas like the Short North or the Arena District where people can hop from one bar to the next.

BoMA, as we know, sits as a lone beacon on East Broad St with no other subsidiary bars or restaurants around it. It is a destination venue - once you’re there, you are more than likely there for the night.

All of these things - location, customer service, venue – add to a business’s imaging and public persona, which ends up being vital for customer associability. But what was BoMA supposed to be? A high-end restaurant? An elitist club? A funky eclectic downtown dance club? An art gallery? It was hard to say, and everyone had a different opinion. The concept was inventive and the pieces were all exciting, but maybe they just had the wrong guy putting them together.

Well before BoMA had its last dance, the people that funded the project stepped in. Like any good investors would do in such a situation, they came in and did an internal overhaul to firm up the venue’s direction and change its attitude.

One delightful switch was the recruitment of one of the original creators of Shadowbox Cabaret to steer things in the right direction.

Becky Gentile, BoMA’s new Creative Director and I got together see what’s new at BoMA, the business of nightlife and customer service.

Chris Hayes: Hey Becky, you’re rather new to the BoMA team as they have had some fairly recent turnover. How did you get involved, who’s still there and what’s going on?

Becky Gentile: Bret Adams and Bob Leibert, 2 of the investors behind BoMA, called me in November of 07 and asked me to help them turn BoMA around. I have known Bret for almost 20 years. I conned him into helping a little, struggling theatre troupe called “Shadowbox Cabaret” way back when. I guess he thought

that I owed him a favor.

Tom Starker and Pamela Theodotou are no longer with us. It is my hope that we retained the best of BoMA’s management; Bob Larrick our dashing GM is still with us, Brian Parker, the most fabulous chef in the world, Nick Cicco our brilliant dining room manager and John Kohstal our handsome bar manager to name a few. We have a number of new faces as well.

Chris Lynch, one of my former Shadowbox Partners has been brought on board as Director of Corporate event sales. He has been an incredible addition! And just last week we brought in Ric Jinkens from North Carolina as President of “all that is BoMa“. It really is all about building a team of great people to help make BoMA work. They say it takes a village and with BoMA it literally does take a village. Tim Knapp from Lyle Gallery is our curator. Robbie Daniels is going to be helping us put together events geared towards the GBLT crowd.

CH: The venue is a huge undertaking; did BoMA bite off more than it could chew for the Columbus market?

BG: No, I don’t think BoMA bit off more than it can chew. One of the main problems is that BoMA wasn’t being used to it’s “highest and best value” which I believe is as a special event center, hosting corporate events, meetings, parties, weddings and receptions. When they first opened it was all about the nightclub. Unfortunately, as we all know, nightclubs come and go, you have to constantly reinvent yourself. When the nightclub lost it’s initial WOW factor there was no foundation to support the facility and it struggled. Couple that with a bad customer service reputation and you have a big problem.

CH: BoMA opened to much fanfare here in town, but over time got the reputation for its staff and management as being, for lack of a better word, a bunch of tools. How has that changed? What’s your customer service model now?

BG: Customer Service was the first issue that I addressed when I started working with BoMA. It was appalling and we had (and still have) a lot to make up for. If I leave any mark on BoMA it would be that I helped change our customer service from being the worst in Columbus to the best in Columbus. You can have a mediocre facility, not so great food, but if you have great customer service people will keep coming back. Why? Because we all like to be treated well. We all want to be special. BoMA has an amazing facility, incredible food, unbelievable ambiance…add top rate customer service to that and it’s unbeatable. It’s not perfect yet, but we’re getting there. The role model? My mother…she always made everyone feel welcome and important and that’s how I want everyone to feel when they are at BoMA. CH: Is there a dress code?

BG: Yes there is a dress code. We ask that people dress respectfully. No athletic clothes, no tennis shoes, no sports logos, no hat turned sideways or backwards and no extremely baggy clothes. We aren’t trying to make a statement with our dress code, but we want to not only respect the venue but our patrons as well.

CH: Who do you view as your customer base?

What’s your plan to expand your market share?

BG: BoMA should be accessible to everyone!

That was one of the problems in the beginning. continued on pg 26

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

12 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 13

STRAIGHT UP

by Adam Lippe

A Night of Too Many Nerds “No person is too ugly to have sex with… The next time you see an ugly person, I want you to put your hand on their shoulder and say, ‘Dammit, let’s have sex.’”

– Eddie Murphy on Saturday Night Live A smart lady once wrote, “Nerds are just cool people with bad PR.” Being a fellow nerd, I once agreed with that. But that was until I realized I wasn’t a real nerd - in the truest sense of the word.

Real Nerds have only one interest, and they are so focused on it that they cannot focus on anything else - to the detriment of their entire lives. Therefore they never find out who they are, sexually, emotionally, or otherwise, because few people would voluntarily spend their time with them. They’ll never find out if they’re into men, women, or children.

While I did have the luxury of learning that boys have penises and girls have vaginas, I also learned that my nerd passions are film, boxing, baseball, stand-up comedy, video games, and making people feel uncomfortable. All worthy interests, but nothing as determined as say, never leaving my computer chair, not even to go the bathroom, living in a cesspool of urine and feces and not even noticing my rolls of fat, copious sweat, or heinous smell. The furthest I’ve gone, within a bout of laziness, was to watch football - shirtless and unshowered - while eating Wise Cheez Doodles and letting the crumbs and cheese flakes spatter deep into my chest hair.

Gross? Nerdy? Maybe. Unfortunately, any activity that is likely to be aped by a frat boy in his postdate-rape-hangover is automatically disqualified as nerdy.

But the media portrayal of nerds , instead, takes on a sort of mocking impersonal tone; with phony reverence and snarky insults hidden by journalistic integrity. This was exemplified by an article a few weeks ago in The Other Paper, which previewed that weekend’s “24 Hour Ohio Sci-Fi Marathon” being held at the Drexel Theater. The piece was condescending and entirely without insight. I had the feeling that there would be no one from the paper actually covering the festival, just snickering from afar.

So I thought it would be best to experience it for myself. I’d been to horror conventions before, where thousands of people lined up just for the opportunity to pay $25 for an autograph from the lady who wasn’t Sigourney Weaver in Alien, or $15 from the guy who played Sex Machine in From Dusk Til’ Dawn.

For the most part, such conventions feature a lot

of people watching, where you’re amazed at the lengths people will go to to dress up like their favorite characters. Fans wear full regalia and makeup, despite the fact that they are at least 200 pounds too heavy to carry it off, and go to booths to overpay for “rare” DVDs they could easily get on the Internet for half the price. You can tell that the most important thing for them is the experience; because if you think about what they are doing, it is just too sad.

You witness them gawking at aging former nonstars, while shoving past other geeks to get in to the main room just to hear directors and stars of the latest direct-to-DVD “classic” brag about their “controversial” creation that the studios are “afraid” of. A lot of the times these people are correct about the studio fears, because the studios don’t like to distribute films with skullfucking and 90 minutes of non-stop graphic gore, which would prevent them from getting any marketable rating.

Meanwhile, the truth is that 99 percent of these films are absolute worthless garbage - even from a genre fan’s perspective.

But that’s the difference between a nerd and a real nerd, who thinks it is worth sludging through hundreds hours of amateurish crap just for one moment of unsung genius. A real nerd waits hours to see a man fighting against his dismembered hand in Evil Dead II or a brilliant slasher film deconstruction of Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon as the film treats these psychopathic figures as actual people, and their job just happens to be murdering people in creative ways.

At times, I’d count myself among the real nerds those many faithful who sit through a lot of dreck at festivals - sometimes without even a single film amusing me out of 40 during an entire weekend.

So, during my analysis of the Drexel’s Sci-Fi marathon, it would be fair to call me both an insider and a hypocrite for writing the following: • Real Nerds are smelly, fat, ungainly, socially inept, unpleasant, and generally limited in their know-it-all-ness. When they see a fair-minded portrayal of themselves on screen, they [unsuccessfully] mock it, perhaps because it is too close to home for them to acknowledge. [One of the monsters in one of the films screened, the fantastic Big Man Japan, was a chubby, sweaty, lumpy creature with a magnanimous comb over. So it must have been like looking into a very uncomfortably accurate mirror].

• When there is anything remotely involving sexuality in front of them, they squirm and shuffle. In

an attempt to distance themselves and appear cool, they make terrifically unfunny comments at the screen, MST3K style (Mystery Science Theater 3000, for those without pocket protectors and tape on their glasses).

• The Real Nerd comments constantly during movies, which is a foolish choice, considering the films are plenty unintentionally funny without them.

These people bring their sense of irony and not their deodorant. It is unfortunate that it was rare that anyone wanted to admit they were actually enjoying the films at the festival, worrying instead about shouting out mindless trivia. No one should ever catch you enjoying the film legitimately!

• If Real Nerds did enjoy something, they would overstate its greatness/badness to justify and validate their existence. One quote that I overheard seemed to personify it: “That last movie shook my faith in mankind,” said with an awkward laugh and a needy stare. This sort of low self-esteem and suggestible behavior is especially disheartening, considering these Real Nerds had deliberately gone to the Drexel’s Sci-Fi marathon to meet like-minded people. All their effort brought out was one insecurity after another.

• When people did enjoy films, it was always a bit too much, in a rather enthusiastically creepy way.

One fellow, dressed in what looked like a butcher’s uniform (I kept trying to order steaks from him, but he took no notice), carried around a large posterboard with a list of every single film that either appeared or was supposed to appear at the festival - all 25 years of it. He had one copy for himself and one he intended to give to the programmer.

There was no special artwork or accompanying posters, just a list, written in marker. Perhaps a disturbing side effect of OCD? Another man - a giant with the thickest glasses I’ve ever seen - liked to complain at the strangest things. During Lady Terminator, an awesomely terrible Indonesian rip-off of The Terminator, complete with terrible dubbing, costumes, acting, and camerawork, where the only possible response was derisive laughter, he was annoyed that the people around him were loudly mocking the film (as was the entire theater of 500 or so, an unfortunate majority of which never got out of their seats during the entire 24 hour marathon, having probably brought colostomy bags and catheters). He got up and complained about the audience’s film mockery to one of the staff members outside the screening room. When he returned to the theater a bit later, he

looked for the film programmer and, not finding him, began poking me in the chest with the stick.

What I had initially thought was a walking cane, I realized was not. When I explained that I wasn’t sure where the programmer was, the Real Nerd stomped off.

• When eavesdropping or participating in conversations with the patrons, Real Nerds’ limits were ever so evident. They had no knowledge outside of their field of concentration. One guy would know exclusively about Star Trek. Another would wait his turn until Battlestar Galactica was brought up, so he could discuss the differences between the old and new versions. All of it was very literal-minded, as well. Analysis of anything but the surface of the material was alien, and I heard repeatedly that while sci-fi was their passion, they didn’t look at it as more than entertainment. I was even asked the deadly question - normally reserved for the layman who is confused by why someone would actually use his brain - “How do you enjoy any movies if all you do is analyze them?” I’ve come to expect this question from a typical Joe, but not from a Real Nerd.

While all this sounds depressing and negative, what it really made me realize was how similar to these guys (and a paltry number of females) the general public is. Ever meet someone who doesn’t watch the news or read? Ever meet someone who can only talk about Ohio State football or the weather? (An amazingly prevalent characteristic in Columbus). How about people who choose a president based solely on one issue - whether it be abortion, gun control, or gay rights? Ever notice that that’s pretty much all they know about?

Real Nerds are like the guy you work with who takes on the personality of an uninformed lobbyist who has no influence except when he seizes the opportunity to push his agenda at the watercooler.

So Real Nerds are not unusual; they’re just separated from everyone else. From one ostracized group to another - from the mouthbreathers to the cocksuckers - realize that Real Nerds, like gays, are people, too.

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

14 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 15

TRAVEL

RIDE THE RAILS DURING A VISIT TO OHIO’S MOST UNIQUE WHISTLE STOP Hocking Valley Scenic Railway has unique offerings not available at any other whistle stop.

Tucked back in the rolling hills of Southeast Ohio Appalachia, there’s more than just nature’s beauty in the midst of this leisurely scenic railway. Nearby the Nelsonville depot, there’s an eatery where train enthusiasts like to grab a bite before boarding time. Sometime the air is filled with lively railroading stories. Go ahead, interrupt and ask your questions, they don’t mind. It’s all part of that Hocking Valley charm.

Before crossing the tracks to the old-time depot to purchase your boarding pass, be sure to take advantage of the photo opps that abound. Stroll among railroad history and see lines of coaches, cabooses and engines depicting the eras of railroads past. But before time slips away, or the train sells-out, be sure to get your ticket.

Inside the old depot is a mini museum displaying railroad artifacts. In addition to holiday trains and the ever-popular specialty trains offered throughout the year, two excursions are offered regularly on weekends from April to November.

1. Roundtrip to Haydenville spanning one hour and 45 minutes departing at Noon.

2. Roundtrip to Logan spanning two hours and 15 minutes departing at 2:30 pm.

Beginning May 24, 2008 both of these trains make stops at Robbins Crossing where period-dressed volunteers bring the Pioneer Village to life complete with fiddles and banjos rock’n the porch of a log house to the blacksmiths at work in their authentic shop.

All aboard the cars, some dating back to the 1920s, pulled by one of several diesel engines. Yes, there’s a caboose. In fact, there’s a caboose train too but we’ll get to that later. Passengers get to choose from open-air coaches or enclosed, which

come heated in winter, which is important for the Santa trains.

And now, sit back and enjoy the relaxing ride through the countryside. The engineer will let you know when to look left or right for the points of interest. In the meantime, gaze at the forest and lakes and the backdrop of rolling Hocking Hills. You even get to go over rivers and streams on a couple of train bridges. Near the halfway point, the train will stop, no it isn’t being robbed by bandits, that treat is saved for the robbery trains. Instead, it is to treat everyone to a sight not often seen.

The train is about to reverse direction but instead of traveling backward, the engine is detached, slowly riding along side everyone on adjacent track and reconnected.

Along the way to Robbins Crossing you’ll pass the old train yard where would-be retired engines, coaches and cabooses are restored to their former glory complete with new seats and fresh paint but that’s the easy part. Some need massive overhauls of their mechanical parts and bodies. This railway is full of surprises!

Now about those specialty trains (make your reservation well in advance): · Murder Mystery Trains: Ride the rails of murder on the Hocking Express. “Cirque du Murder” is on Saturday, May 31.

The train departs at 11:45 a.m. and 6:30 p.m. Then on August 2 and 3, hop aboard for “Tony & Tina’s Murder”. This murder-mystery train departs Saturday, August 2, at 11:45 a.m. and 7 p.m. and again Sunday, August 3 at 2:45pm. · Great Train Robbery: Perhaps the friendliest train robbery in history will take place June 14 and again in September 20, 2008. The train is actually stopped by bandits on horseback riding upside it guns a blaz’n and determined to bag some loot from the passengers onboard. Don’t despair, play money will be handed out to everyone onboard.

· Wine & Cheese Train: Ride the rails in class Friday, June 20 at 7pm and enjoy a wine and cheese party. · Caboose Train: If you love cabooses, then this special is definitely for you. This train is comprised completely of “cabeese“ on August 30 at 11am. It promises to be the most colorful train you’ve ever been on. · Fall Foliage Trains: One train will run each Thursday and Friday at 1:30 pm. from October 2 – 31, 2008. These weekday trains are in addition to the regular weekend schedule. · Santa Trains: Ride with Santa on the train! Enjoy the onboard narration of Christmas poems and festive music. Santa visits with each child on the train and one of his elves provides a special candy treat. Make this year’s Christmas season a memorable one. In fact, make reservations soon for November 29-30, December 6-7, 13-14, and 20-21.

While you’re in town, you may want to stay a while and see: · Historic Dew Hotel, where President Roosevelt, President Taft, President McKinley, and President Harding all made campaign stops. I wonder how they got there? · Stuart’s Opera House, built in 1879. · Restored Nelsonville Public Square. If there’s a shopper in the group, you may never see them again. · The Rocky® Outdoor Gear Store. · Robbins Crossing Museum and Nature Study at Hocking College. · And of course there’s nearby Hocking Hills Area State Parks – the hot-tub capital!

For the latest fares, specials, operating times, how to charter a private train, other details and directions, log onto www.hockingvalleytrain.com. And make your next whistle stop, Nelsonville, Ohio to board the Hocking Valley Scenic Railway!

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

16 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

FEATURE STORY

by Russ Goodwin

Armed Forces Day and

Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell As we approach Armed Forces Day, 2008, I think it is appropriate to revisit the United States policy of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, Don’t Pursue”, commonly referred to as DADT. As a review, DADT was the negotiated compromise agreement between the then New President Bill Clinton and Congress that would allow LGBT soldiers, sailors, airmen and marines to serve in the U.S. Military, provided they did not and do not disclose to anyone their sexual identity and do not participate in any “Homosexual” activities while serving in the U.S. military.

This compromise came about when President Clinton tried to make good on a campaign promise to the LGBT community to fully integrate the Armed Forces to include “ALL” Americans. I guess, to a group of old, straight, mostly male Congressmen and Senators this seemed a reasonable compromise, but in practice, it did not and does not work and has led to the discharge of thousands of qualified, motivated and dedicated young Americans serving honorably in the U. S. Military. Individual Americans who were and continue to be motivated to join, even knowing they are breaking the law. By asking these Americans, in the peak of their physical and sexual lives to forgo sex is at best naïve. The old saying “boys will be boys” and “girls will be girls” holds here.

For young gay man or women to forgo sex, all the while being bombarded by the sexual media and while listening to the sexual exploits of their straight peers is asking the impossible. It just won’t happen.

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

I served before and during the era of DADT. In my early career, beginning in January of 1977, Gays in the Military could not officially serve, in fact, on the enlistment application there was a box I was required to check that asked if I had ever participated in Homosexual activities. This was in the same group of questions that included “Have you committed a felony” and “Have you ever smoked marijuana”. I, of course checked no, for me a clear “white” lie. You see, had I checked yes, my 20year military career - a career that I loved and a career that saw me win many awards and medals for my “outstanding” service - would have ended before it began. I wanted to serve, I wanted to travel, I wanted to get money to complete college and I wanted a better life.

The same reasons most young men and women choose to join.

So where are we now on the efforts to repeal DADT? HR 1246 has been introduced in the U.S. Congress to amend title 10, United States Code, to enhance the readiness of the Armed Forces by replacing the current policy concerning homosexuality in the Armed Forces, referred to as DADT, with a policy of nondiscrimination on the basis of sexual orientation. The Primary Sponsor of this crucial legislation is Representative Martin T. Meehan of MA. This legislation was introduced on February 28, 2007 and currently has 142 Co-Sponsors, including the following from Ohio: Rep. Stephanie Tubbs-Jones, Rep. Dennis J. Kucinich, and Rep. Betty Sutton. Just 3 or our 7

Democratic Representatives to Congress from Ohio, notice not one Ohio Republican Congressperson has agreed to cosponsor, even as they are very vocally hawkish on the nations folly in the Middle East were we have lost over 4,000 men and women.

Outside of Congress we are gathering support from many arenas, including the ranks of the military. A poll of U.S. troops indicated most approve of the repeal. The December 2006 poll of service members who had served in Iraq and/or Afghanistan found 73 percent were “comfortable with lesbians and gays.” A 2004 poll found that a majority of junior enlisted believed gays and lesbians should be allowed to serve openly in the military, up from 16% in 1992. Military leadership is slowly catching up with the troops in the field. Recently, the Joint Chiefs of Staff Chairman, Admiral Mike Mullen told the graduating cadets at the U.S. Military Academy that the military was “ready to accept gay service members” if Congress repeals DADT. When a cadet asked about the “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” law and what would happen if someone was elected President in 2008 who wants to change it, Adm. Mullen said “It’s a law, and we follow it, Should the law change, the military will carry that out too. We are a military that is under the control of our civilian elected leaders,” he said.

“It has served us well since we’ve been founded. That is a special characteristic of our country and I would never do anything to jeopardize that.”

What can you do to help the efforts to repeal DADT you might ask? Write and call your Congressmen and women, and demand they support the repeal of DADT, Republican or Democrat. You must impress on them your feelings that the repeal is a much bigger issue. It is not just a gay issue, but a National Security Issue. When we are at war, we need our brightest and best to serve. These brave and gifted individuals are not defined by sexuality, but by intelligence, commitment and patriotism. You can also support the Servicemen’s Legal Defense Network who has work for years to reverse DADT and to provide Legal representation to service men and women who are facing discharge under this law. You can read more on DADT at www.sldn.org.

I urge everyone to get involved in the movement to repeal. Historically, social change has started with the Military. President Harry Truman racially integrated the Military after World War II and this integration lead to historic change in America and the end to government sanctioned racial discrimination.

Lastly, many in the LGBT Community feel removed from the U.S. military but remember, you may not have served, you may not be the one making back to back deployments to Iraq and Afghanistan, but I’m sure, if you look closely, you know someone who is affected by DADT. Let’s all get involved and Repeal DADT.

OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 17

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

18 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

FEATURE STORY

by Mickey Weems

© Victoria Alexandrova | Dreamstime.com

Safe Speeding: A Conversation with G.I. Jane Between Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell and the Iraq quagmire, I believe that Gay people shouldn’t join the US military. Queer folks should go to someplace civilized like Canada if they want to become soldiers, sailors, Marines, or Air Force crewmembers, someplace that will accept them as they are.

A dear friend of mine in the Army disagrees with me.

During this year’s Qualia Festival of Gay Folklife, director Tom Murray presented Tell, his fine documentary on Gays in the military.

My friend was in the audience. To preserve her privacy, let’s call her “G.I. Jane.”

Tell presents the stories of Gay military personnel who love the Armed Forces but don’t feel the US military gives them the same love back because of the Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell policy (DADT). Over and over, they would say how they felt a strong bond with their fellows in the Service that was absent in civilian life. The official policy of discrimination, however, was an affront to their honor. It bruised their bond.

The documentary is insightful, heart-rending, sometimes humorous, and basically depressing. I asked G.I. Jane what she thought of it.

“I think the tone of the documentary was too negative at times,” she said. Referring to an officer in Tell who recommended that LGBTQ folks not join the military, she added, “I would never tell anyone not to serve their country.”

G.I. Jane sympathizes with the situation of those who chafed (and continue to feel oppressed) under DADT. She has been there. But her experience of the Army did not leave her with the sense that DADT was too great a burden for LGBTQ people to bear.

How G.I. Jane Joined The Army G.I. Jane signed up after college. At one point, she got fed up with basic training (as do most of us who go in). She told her superiors she was a Lesbian. They didn’t bat an eye.

“They said, ‘You can be Gay if you want. Just be discreet,” she told me. When she insisted on pushMAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

ing the issue, they resisted letting her go and convinced her to stay on.

Were her superiors reluctant because she is a woman? Perhaps women in the military are treated like women in sports. Maybe the assumption is made that most of them are Lesbian from the gitgo.

Or was this just another sign that the military is becoming more tolerant, at least at ground level? Or are they getting so desperate to keep troops, they’ll turn a blind eye to almost anything?

I suspect that the answer is all the above. Pressure to not be Gay seems to be greater on men than women, and the Armed Forces are really having problems with recruitment since the years after the US barged into Iraq.

But the biggest reason is a change of heart, in the heart of the military. While officials in the Pentagon continue to discriminate against Gay people, the troops are becoming increasingly tolerant and supportive of their Queer peers. This was reflected in Murray’s documentary. Some of the soldiers in Tell also reported a lot of acceptance from the Straight people they worked with.

It seems that service personnel, especially soldiers in the field, really don’t give a damn. They have much more important things to worry about than who their comrades are sleeping with. Jane confirmed this; she joined the Army before 9/11/2001, so having enough soldiers for Iraq was not an issue for the Army at that time. Also, her superiors thought she was a damned good soldier and gave her the choice of whether to stay or go. Ultimately, because of the bond with her fellow soldiers (and excitement over weapons training!), she decided to stay.

“We have a new generation of soldiers serving now,” she told me. “If you’re in command, who do you put at the front of your discipline list? Those who lack respect, discipline, and a sense of duty? Or do you kick out the stellar soldier who just might have a significant other hidden at home?

“I had a friend who confessed to her commander

that she was unhappy living as a woman, that she identified with being a man, and thus wanted to make the change. That soldier was given the choice of discharge or serving. She chose discharge, and her commander let her go with not only an Honorable Discharge, but also an award for her service.

Talk about times changing!”

The Ethics Of Breaking The Law (Within Reason) Tell also shows the attempts of some men to join the military after announcing to recruiters that they were Gay. When the recruiter refused them, they held a sit-in at the recruiting office until they were arrested for trespassing.

“There was no need for them to do that if they really wanted to join,” said Jane.

“If you’re Gay and want to join the military,” she advises, “treat your enlistment like you would speeding. Take all the proper precautions to make sure you don’t get caught.”

“But speeding is breaking the law,” I said.

“But everybody does it!” she retorted. “Come on.

Most of us feel that speeding within reason, safe speeding, is only against the law if you get caught.”

Safe speeding. OK, now we were walking into some interesting, if not dreadful, ethical territory. On the one had, Jane is right. Almost everybody speeds, and none of us really feel we do wrong when we do so.

But when we get caught, we realize we were breaking the law, no matter how upset we might get with the officer. On the other hand, being Gay should not be against the law, be it civilian law, religious doctrine or the Uniform Code of Military Justice. If a soldier gets pulled over, so to speak, for metaphorically driving while Gay, that just seems wrong.

If You Want To Beat ‘Em, Join ‘Em “When I was in college, I was an out-and-proud activist for the Gay community,” said Jane. “Those days are over for me. I really believe that I can do more by quietly setting an example than by going

head-to-head with the authorities.”

Some LGBTQ folks would dispute the notion that one could be discreet-and-proud. But let’s look at what Jane means by discretion.

Jane’s fellow soldiers knew she is Gay. She didn’t broadcast it, but neither did she ever deny it. As with most people, Gay and Straight, she feels that her private life is hers to discuss when she chooses, and is not properly a topic for public consideration.

Confrontation brings urgent topics to the fore.

There are times when such a strategy is necessary.

But confrontation too often turns into a shouting match where nobody listens to anyone. Day-to-day relationships in which Gay people are people first, where they affirm themselves without being confrontational in the grocery store, at the gas pump, in line at the bank, at work, at the polls, walking the dog in the park, eating dinner at a restaurant, in all the various communal settings where people meet people as fellow human beings, not as causes or enemies, are sites for passive education.

I’ve seen G.I. Jane and her beloved and her daughter relating with everyday people. It doesn’t take those around them long to figure out what kind of family they are. Nobody says a word, and nobody bristles, a tiny but firm step in the liberation of our people.

This is what’s happening in our military. Gay people are doing their jobs, supporting their units, and discreetly coming out to those around them without making a big fuss about it. Such passive education could not be possible if Gays quit joining the military.

As I said earlier, I don’t agree with G.I. Jane about Gays joining the military. But I don’t have to agree with somebody to recognize that they have a valid viewpoint, give them moral support, or to honor the good that they do for us all.

So, to G.I. Jane and all the other Gay soldiers, sailors, Marines, and Air Force crewmembers who are quietly making a difference, keep up the good work.

OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 19

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

20 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

FEATURE STORY

by J Eric Peters

THE END

PART 1

A SOLDIERS TALE OF COMING OUT IN THE MILITARY CHARACTERIZATION OF SERVICE: Honorable REASON(S) FOR SEPARATION: Committed homosexual act(s) So reads the record of my Certificate of Discharge (Department of Defense (DD) Form 214), issued 21 September 1987 back when I was a child prodigy only nine years old. (Do the math.)

“Homosexual act(s)”?

I wish they had asked.

By that point I gladly would have told them there were way more than one. I used to prance around my barracks room every Thursday night wearing nothing but my tighty whities and singing, “Balai Hai,” “How do you solve a problem like Maria?” and every other Rogers and Hammerstein tune I could think of. Oh, what a homosexual act THAT was!

Actually the homosexual act that got me thrown out was a delightful ménage in a single-occupancy room in a barracks under the control of the brigade commander who pushed for my ouster.

My bad - I forgot to invite him.

AN AIR FORCE ATTORNEY ON THE POLICY’S CURRENT STATUS “The homosexual policy,” reads a statement written for this story by Col. Renee Bennett, JAGC, Aeronautical Systems Center Staff Judge Advocate, Wright-Patterson AFB, “applied by the Air Force, and officials at Wright Patterson Air Force Base, is based on a law, 10 U.S.C. §654, passed by Congress in 1993. The Air Force, like all branches of the armed forces, is bound to follow that law.

“The law focuses on homosexual conduct not orientation. Merely feeling that one is attracted to someone of the same gender is not a bar to service unless it is accompanied by hoMAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

mosexual conduct. ‘Homosexual conduct’ includes:,” according to Col. Bennett, Esq., “(1) engaging or attempting [See Rogers vs. Hammerstein, ibid.] to engage in a homosexual act [Ibid]; (2) stating he/she is a homosexual or bisexual; and (3) marrying or attempting to marry a member of the same sex.

“Under the U.S. Code, a homosexual act is defined as bodily contact or attempted bodily contact between members of the same sex for the purpose of satisfying sexual desires. A homosexual act does not include actions such as going to a gay bar or reading a magazine portraying suggestive pictures of the same sex.

“Although this law is often referred to as the ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ policy, that is not an accurate characterization of the law concerning homosexuality in the armed forces. While a service member will never be asked,” claimed Col. Bennett, “about his/her sexual orientation, the member may be asked about alleged homosexual conduct if an inquiry is initiated.

“An inquiry into whether an individual has engaged in homosexual conduct may only be initiated by a commander who has ‘credible information’ that homosexual conduct has occurred. Credible information requires more than merely seeing a military member at a gay bar, knowing that an individual supports gay rights, or seeing a person marching in a gay pride parade [such as Columbus’s on Saturday, June 28]. Credible information exists only when the information and the surrounding circumstances support a reasonable belief that a military member engaged in homosexual conduct, as described in the U.S. Code.

“If the commander conducts an inquiry and homosexual conduct is substantiated, the Air Force will begin administrative separation procedures. Those procedures ensure procedural

due process. Specifically, the member is placed on notice of the specific allegations, is provided military counsel free of charge, and is given an opportunity to confront the evidence against them and to present evidence on their behalf at an administrative hearing.

“If an administrative discharge board determines the member did engage in homosexual conduct the member will be given an honorable discharge,” wrote Col. Bennett,” unless the individual committed a homosexual act under certain aggravating circumstances (such as an act with a minor or an act involving force [e.g. rape]) or the administrative discharge action was initiated because of a homosexual act and unrelated misconduct.”

My first reaction to Col. Bennett’s statement was to note what it implies about military heterosexism and homophobia. Foremost, a military attorney provided a statement for a story to be published in a GBLT newspaper. Wow! The policy stipulates an expectation that GBL people discharged under its provisions would receive honorable discharges. Service members remain remarkably free under the policy as Col. Bennett lays it out.

My experience as a veteran, however, and particularly as a former enlisted legal clerk/specialist, tells me, secondly, that not all commanders honor the spirit of the policy.

Some even search actively for ways to get around policy. For example couldn’t a commander, told that a subordinate had been seen at a Pride parade or spotted in a public library reading this periodical, simply begin paying “extra attention” to everything that subordinate does while not applying quite enough scrutiny for the “extra attention”/ scrutiny to constitute an investigation? Might some commanders treat any contact of whatever dura-

tion under whatever circumstances between a subordinate and one of us out-&-proud civilians as an “attempt” to “commit a homosexual act”? Since every society has its deviants, the military must have its renegade “policy be damned” commanders.

Third and finally, what a stupid and wasteful policy! Col. Bennett, Esq. begins with the policy as given just like most of her professional peers would. Her job description doesn’t include questioning public policy; that’s our responsibility.

This high-ranking military lawyer’s last statement indeed merits note: “In 2007, Wright-Patterson Air Force Base did not initiate any discharges based on alleged homosexual conduct.”

That’s not because we’re not there; my coming out experiences convince me of that.

COMING OUT IN THE MILITARY I walked into a military recruiter’s office on the campus of Athens’s Ohio University at an age exceeding 17 in June 1983 using a time machine. (Can’t PROVE it didn’t happen, can you?)

In the enlistment process I denied being gay because I had not yet had post-adolescent (nor General Mills-adolescent) (I know; painful, wasn’t it?) sex and because I was still sincerely expecting those nasty feelings - Satan’s temptations - to disappear.

Eight months of Delayed Entry Program later, Greyhound took me to Fort Knox for Basic Training in February’s ice, snow and cold at the US Army Armor Training Center. Along with roughly 30-40 other young, healthy studs, I was pushed through the rigors of rifle qualification, military education and physical training (two-mile runs, etc.) by our platoon’s drill

OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 21

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

22 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

FEATURE STORY continued sergeants Atkinson, Bryant and Montoya. We slept, showered and shone boots in a World War II-era open-bay barracks that afforded next to no privacy.

Two guys from another platoon got caught fooling around in the shower room while one of them was supposedly pulling scheduled guard duty. It took the 2nd Training Brigade weeks to complete their discharge paper work. Meanwhile my platoon got one of our very few off-base morale activities: a musical performance (neither Rogers nor Hammerstein as I recall) and reception at a local church. I remember seeing one of the two guys there; it was both exciting and scary to talk to someone I knew was really gay, doubly scary because I thought I’d arouse (Oh, grow up!) suspicion just by speaking to him in public.

Private First Class (PFC) Somethingorother Mountford, from moneyed Virginia gentry, and I were the Honor Graduates from our class at Legal Clerk School at Fort Benjamin Harrison, which was near Indianapolis. Those eight unremarkable weeks passed.

If I mentioned Jump School at this point I’d have to admit to chickening out at the smallest tower, so let’s just skip ahead to Autumn 1984, which found me assigned to post headquarters HHC, US Army Infantry Center - in Fort Benning, Georgia. (Yes, THAT Ft. Benning, where radicals and other progressives frequently protested the School of the Americas.) My first permanent assignment was basically a 9-5, Monday-throughFriday office job tracking drunk driving incidents and processing Letters of Reprimand for the base commander.

Off-duty hours found me discovering the post amateur stage theater. The artistic director, a Vietnam vet named Robert M., hosted a party for the cast and crew at his home where prominently-displayed nude photos of hotties, and other young men displayed more than one of his hobbies. He invited me back for a private visit.

No longer a virgin, I discovered the gay bars just off-base in Columbus (Georgia, that is) and in Hotlanta. I felt like a kid in a candy store and so began (or, rather, continued) my discoveries of the problems of alcoholism and sex addiction.

Soon I was transferred from the base headquarters’s Office of the Staff Judge Advocate to a battalion-level position as a legal clerk. My responsibilities included processing non-judicial punishment (sometimes erroneously called “captain’s mast” and other nonsense by the military’s light and breezy branches, hereinafter “Navy” and/or “Air Force” but don’t tell Col. Bennett), informally advising commanders and attending to compliance with military law such as Article 15 of the Uniform Code of Military Justice.

The Summer of 1985 found me with a Combat Engineering Group in Honduras supposedly supporting their mission of building an airstrip. I never saw any Rangers or Green Berets lurking about, but it was the beginning of the second term of Ronald “al Qaiada’s Arms Dealer” Reagan so who knows?

While there I submitted a personnel action request form asking for transfer from Fort Benning, the engineers’ home base, to Europe. I learned later that the battalion command sergeant major, who did not accompany us to Basecamp Bulldog, had ripped up my previous similar request. The battalion adjutant recommended disapproval but forwarded my request to the Pentagon as required by regulations. It was apMAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

proved.

One of the five great loves of my life, all of whom have been blonds (or blondish), interestingly enough, began shortly before we shipped to Central America. Keith H.’s boi-next-door good looks, sexy southern accent and native intelligence (as a medic) appealed to me. They also appealed to Julius J., my best friend and a commissioned graduate of West Point. I introduced them anticipating a ménage and they paired off.

With only my own greed and stupidity to blame, I was devastated.

My reassignment orders came down from the Department of the Army (“DA,” in the usual parl-

ance with several alternative translations) and I was thrilled to be assigned to V Corps headquarters in the city of Frankfurt, West Germany (before reunification). I’d spend the next eighteen months in a major European city!

V Corps’s Office of the Staff Judge Advocate operated a branch office in USMCA Wildflecken, a remote mountain village with only four battalions and assorted support units. The combination of air defense artillery, armor, engineering and military intelligence units was designed to serve a front-line mission near the East-West German border’s Fulda Gap. Yikes!

With relatively little to do but work, I developed a reputation for expertise in two common legal actions taken by commanders against lowerranking enlisted soldiers (such as myself, by the way): nonjudicial punishment UP Article 15, UCMJ, and administrative separations (discharges).

I’VE NEVER PLAYED ONE ON TV I’m not a lawyer and I’ve never played one on TV either, but I’ve known quite a few.

Mark Narens, Esq., a close personal friend and, in my experience, provided the following statement about one strategy for ending the current Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell policy.

“The case currently working its way through the courts involving the constitutionality of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, Cook v. Rumsfeld (or Cook v.

Gates) is necessary, but is probably doomed to failure.

“At present, the U.S. Supreme Court has not

taken the next step to declare homosexuals to be in a “protected class” under the Constitution, nor has it determined that individuals have a “fundamental right” to engage in homosexual conduct. Lawrence v. Texas, the most recent U.S. Supreme Court case to deal with the issue of homosexuality studiously failed to take that next step. The current makeup of the U.S. Supreme Court makes this unlikely to change in the foreseeable future.

“Without taking that next step, courts do not apply ‘strict scrutiny’ to cases involving homosexuality in general and ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ in particular. This means that all the Department of

Defense must show to win their case is that, in excluding homosexuals from the military, Congress had a ‘rational basis’ related to a legitimate governmental purpose.

“That ‘rational basis’ standard is easily met, with the courts giving great deference to the judgments of Congress in passing the law.

“Bringing such cases continues to serve a legitimate purpose, even if they are seemingly doomed to failure. It keeps the issue alive in the social consciousness and continues to develop the record by presenting an ever growing body of evidence showing that homosexuality is becoming more accepted in society and the military, and showing that our soldiers are capable of fighting beside the openly gay soldiers of other countries as is happening on a daily basis in Iraq and Afghanistan.

“That soldiers discharged under this wrongheaded policy continue to fight gives more fuel to the growing fire in Congress to change the law.

“While the upcoming election appears promising, we must remember that the rules of Parliamentary Procedure in the Senate allow a minority of 41 Senators to effectively block legislation through the use of a filibuster, which requires the vote of 60 Senators to break. It is very important, then, that we do all that we can to insure that the Democratic majority in both houses of Congress continues to grow this fall, since the most likely avenue of overturning Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell runs through Congress and not the courts.

“The Servicemembers Legal Defense Network deserves much credit for continuing this worthy

fight, and for providing legal assistance to those subjected to this policy.”

SERVICEMEMBERS LEGAL DEFENSE NETWORK Indeed in an interview for this story, SLDN Communications Associate Victor Maldonado stated that SLDN anticipates hearings “in the near future” on the Military Readiness Enhancement Act (H.R. 1246), which would repeal “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” and allow lesbian, gay and bisexual personnel to serve openly. Currently that bill has what SLDN called “bipartisan cosponsorship” consisting of 139 Democrats and three Republicans.

That’s a major victory and a significant step toward service equality. We GBLT veterans owe much to SLDN whose work is now intensifying and both needs and deserves our support. Please go online to www.SLDN.org and click on “DONATE” in the left-hand menu just below SLDN’s logo.

As long as I’m engaging in partisan bashing, however, another fact is worth noting. The New York City Council as well as those in Atlanta, Chicago, Los Angeles, Portland, San Francisco, St. Louis, Tucson and West Hollywood (not to mention the California Senate) all have passed resolutions supporting the Military Readiness Enhancement Act. Why hasn’t Cowtown’s all-Democrat City Council passed one yet? If these cities’ leaders considered it worth the work, could ours be wrong pretending it’s not?

Perhaps those who slobbered all over themselves last year to keep Bill Brownson out of office might consider tackling this issue.

Put up or shut up.

THE BEGINNING OF THE END OF MY MILITARY CAREER Near the end of my enlistment, I decided to pursue two options: completing my college education and reenlisting. A program available at that time to soldiers positioned to transfer college credits and complete a bachelor’s degree within two years made that option possible. I made arrangements to take some leave time, return to the States, explore the University of Cincinnati, etc.

Then I got a love letter from Keith at Ft. Benning. Wow! Of course I revised my travel plans: two days in Ohio and the rest with Keith in Georgia. My visit found him just as hot as ever but also, as I recall, impulsive and moody. Perhaps that was because he - and Julius, still his boyfriend - had, they said, started doing steroids and some drug that frightened me.

Brokenhearted I returned to Europe and, seeking solace, phoned Tony. Like Keith he was a medic. We had met while he was on temporary duty for training away from his regular post. He had cruised me in Wildflecken’s pizza shop, but I told him I wanted to wait to see what was going on with Keith.

After traveling by train to Tony’s base, hours from mine, I discovered that he wasn’t as attractive as I recalled. But his friend was! We wandered off to Tony’s relatively private one-person room in his unit’s barracks. We were getting naked and things were getting interesting when a knock on the room’s external door startled us.

TO BE CONTINUED

OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 23

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

24 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

DEEP INSIDE HOLLYWOOD

by Romeo San Vicente

MADONNA ADOPTS ALL OF MALAWI

CYNTHIA NIXON IS DISTRACTED

ANG LEE’S GAY WOODSTOCK

BORAT FINDS ANOTHER BLONDE TO CHASE

...As a cause, that is. She didn’t simply swoop in take all the children back to her English estate (although there’s probably enough room there).

Undaunted by media criticism of her involvement in the impoverished region - and when was Madonna ever daunted by anything anyway? - the singer has produced a documentary titled I Am Because We Are, about the plight of the millions of AIDS orphans in the African country. Directed

by Nathan Rissman and narrated by Madonna herself, the title comes from a quote from Archbishop Desmond Tutu and concerns the interconnectedness of all life. The movie will benefit Madonna’s charitable foundation, “Raising Malawi,” and recently premiered at the Tribeca Film Festival. Future screenings, via a theatrical release or TV premiere, are still in the works.

The Internet may be buzzing with concerned fan reaction to the “leaked” information that a tragedy (possibly even a death) will be befall one of the main characters in the soon-to-be-released Sex and the City movie (in the office pool, Romeo has Charlotte, and stands to win serious cash), but life goes on for its stars. Cynthia Nixon, everyone’s favorite real-life lesbian cast member, has more stage work in her future. She’ll take the lead role in the off-Broadway comedy Distracted, from playwright Lisa Loomer, at New York’s Roundabout Theatre Company, where she’ll play a concerned mother trying to find the cause and cure for her son’s apparent Attention Deficit Disorder. So far Nixon is the only known cast member, but more information will be announced soon. Meanwhile, patient fans have a while to wait, as performances don’t begin until February 2009.

In decades’ worth of media examination of hippies and the Woodstock generation, there have been numerous documentaries but few narrative features about the legendary concert. Meanwhile, gay participants are often relegated to the sidelines as microculture curiosities within the larger counterculture - that is, if they’re recognized as having existed at all. But film audiences may find themselves surprised to discover that it was a gay man, Elliot Tiber, who was instrumental in issuing the very permit required for the mudsoaked music-fest that defined the late 1960s.

And now Brokeback Mountain director Ang Lee will adapt Tiber’s memoir, Taking Woodstock, for Focus Features. Wedding Banquet and Brokeback collaborator (as well as Focus CEO) James Schamus will work with Lee on this film, as well.

Only just now announced, audiences can expect to wait until at least 2010 to sing along to that infamous Hendrix “National Anthem.”

Sacha Baron Cohen’s Borat saw the comedian’s alter ego obsessed with Baywatch beauty Pam Anderson, who gamely showed up for the filming, reportedly in on the joke the entire time. And now, for Cohen’s next hidden-camera hijacking of reality, featuring his gay fashionista character, “Bruno,” a new blonde is along for the ride - the ubiquitous (to fans of reality television, anyway) Trishelle Cannatella. Already known for showing up for any camera pointed in her direction (a partial credit list: Real World: Las Vegas, Playboy: Girls of Reality TV, The Surreal Life, Fear Factor, William Hung: Hangin’ with Hung, and The Lingerie Bowl), the fame-hungry vixen will play herself in the marquee-space-challenging Bruno: Delicious Journeys Through America for the Purpose of Making Heterosexual Males Visibly Uncomfortable in the Presence of a Gay Foreigner in a Mesh T-Shirt. And you thought Borat‘s wrestling scene was gay...

Romeo San Vicente rarely wears shirts, much less mesh ones. He can be reached care of this publication or at DeepInsideHollywood@qsyndicate.com.

ARTS

by Mary Martineau

Think Globally…Party Locally!

Have you noticed that “local” has become the new “black”? It is uber-fashionable to tout adherence to the “local” movement with the accompanying implied tenets of increasing sustainability, augmenting the local economy and reducing fuel consumption. The North Market has been the embodiment of what it means to be “local” since its inception in 1876. We’re not a newcomer to the dogma; we’ve lived it daily for 132 years! Join in celebration and support of Columbus’ local culinary core, the North Market, at our Apron Gala on Saturday, May 17. You can eat, drink, and get merry all for the benefit of your local public market!

Since 1876, the North Market has been home to local butchers, bakers, fishmongers, greengrocers and farmers. Today our merchant assortment also includes authentic ethnic eateries, specialty food merchants and gifts.

Our market offers an affordable place for small food-related businesses to take root and grow. Case in point, Jeni’s Ice Creams, which got its start in the North Market, will soon have four locations around Columbus and is nationally known for use of local ingredients and ingenious flavors.

The farmers’ market season is just gearing MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

up and Saturdays will soon incorporate twentyfive local farmers selling produce and flowers personally raised by them on their farms right here in Ohio. When you shop at the Market the person helping you is likely the proprietor of the business, an expert about their product and maybe even your neighbor!

Help us continue the great local tradition that is the North Market by attending our twelfth annual Apron Gala. You’ll be plied with plentiful tastes of the gastronomic specialties of each of our merchants. This year’s menu includes a raw bar from the Fish Guys with oysters on the half shell and their outstanding shrimp cocktail, homemade sausages from Bluescreek Farm Meats made in Marysville, an assortment of local cheeses by Curds and Way including the award winning Lake Erie Chevre and guess what? That’s just the appetizer course! Your main course will include sushi, lasagna, tacos, kabobs and more. Wash it down with Columbus Brewing Company’s fine ales, but make sure you save room for dessert!

Jeni’s will be serving their Gallo-award winning Cherry Lambic sorbet, Pure Imagination Chocolatier will be dipping strawberries in chocolate and Mozart’s will serve up their delightful Petit Fours…just to name a few of the

fabulous finishes! And all of it is made right here in Columbus for your enjoyment.

In addition to all of the tremendous food there will be an amazing silent auction with packages and prizes from local businesses, a bubbly bar in the Dispatch Kitchen with MORE FOOD as The Greener Grocer’s Chef Matthew Mascaro whips up locally-inspired canapés, live music with the Eileen Howard Jazz trio, caricatures by local artist Bobby Corkwell and, as the name implies, contests for the best aprons of the evening. Get inspired and show us your best “local” theme in your apron design. Above all, get your tickets to the North Market Apron Gala and support this great local landmark!

The North Market Apron Gala will take place on Saturday, May 17 from 7p-9:30p at the market building at 59 Spruce St. Tickets to the Apron Gala are $75 per person and include all food and beverage for the evening. Tickets are available at the Business Office on the 2nd Floor of the North Market or online at www.northmarket.com.

For more information call 614.463.9664.

The North Market Development Authority is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization and ticket purchases are tax deductible to the fullest extent of the law ($50 per ticket).

Mary Martineau is Director of Marketing at North Market, a member organization of the Columbus Arts Marketing Association. For more information, visit www.camaonline.org.

OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 25

CLASSIFIEDS ADULT CONNECTIONS MEN. CONNECT. EASY. Gay, str8, curious, bi. Instant, live action. Get on & off @ 1800GAYLIVE. Call now 614.410.1555. Free Trial.

BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY FLORAL BUSINESS 70-year-old family-run floral business for sale. Established clients, great location. Please call Mary McCarthy at Sunbelt Business Brokers, 614.734.8338, for more information.

HELP WANTED ADMINISTRATIVE ASSISTANT Predominantly GLBT church seeks part time AA. Ten hours per week, $10/hr, daytime availability a must. Contact Rev. Margaret Hawk at New Creation MCC. 614.409.9610 or revmhawk@newcreationmcc.org.

practice. Daily salary. Dr. Michael Mann, 7043 Pearl Rd, Ste 210, Cleveland, OH 44130.

DRIVERS Co. & O/Ops. Great pay/benefits!

Good hometime! Lots of miles, all paid. CDL-A 2 yrs exp.

800.831.4832.

DRIVERS OwnerOps. Home weekends. $1500 sign-on bonus by 5/30/08.

Paid tolls. $1.00 All Miles. Pass FS=49cpm! Back to Sandusky every 2 days. 800.756.7433 x 4. www.triplecrownsvc.com.

HOUSING/FOR RENT $100 OFF MOVE-IN Merion Village/S. High - 2 BR, 2nd floor w/office; Reeb Ave - 2 BR, double; Buckeye Cir - 3 BR, condo. 614.295.RENT (7368).

OLDE TOWNE EAST 1096 & 1104 Bryden Rd, 1 BR apartments available, new BRANCH BANKER kitchen, wd flrs, vaulted ceiling, Looking for an experienced $450/mo. More OTE rentals availBranch Banker. Must have In Branch sales experience in the fi- able. Call Beacon Property Mgmt. at 614.228.6700. nancial services industry. Outbound calling required. Please OLDE TOWNE EAST direct inquiries or send resume to: Jeff Bergandine 647 N High 3-bedroom house in Olde Towne East. $900/month Quiet. gay St Columbus, OH 43215, friendly street. Fenced in yard 614.241.5600, or email resume to jbergandine@firstcommunity- with deck. Garage parking. Land contract option. If you have been bank.com. to a bird bash party, this is the house. Call Jaybird for more inDENTIST We seek personable, quality-ori- formation. 614.975.5569 ented associate for busy family

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

26 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY continued from pg 11

The management came off as elitist. That’s the last thing I want! BoMA is a destination in Columbus, a one of a kind venue, unlike any other, anywhere! The problem was that Columbus was willing from the start to embrace BoMA and then they were shunned.

How awful is that? This isn’t NY, it’s not LA, it’s Columbus, Ohio and we have to market to the general public. I love that it’s Columbus…we are unique, unlike any other Midwest city. We have a fantastic arts community, we have the Wexner Center, Ballet Met, Catco, Shadowbox, Madlab, the Columbus Museum of Art to name just a few. There are new foundling groups popping up all over! We have some great nightclubs. You won’t catch me dissing any local clubs, that’s wouldn’t be right. We have great restaurants. Our mayor, Michael Coleman keeps pushing to bring the life back to downtown and he is succeeding. We are one of the largest GLBT populations per capita in the US! You’d have to be totally clueless to not understand what the GLBT community brings to the table. It’s because of the GLBT community that many of these entities exist and thrive. What makes Columbus hip.

It’s what makes us so special!

Is there anyone one demographic? No! I hope not! We should be able to appeal to everyone, from people who want to experience great food, to chilling out on our patio, to rubbing shoulders with a celebrity who might show up for club night, to booking a meeting in one of our beautiful rooms, to someone who wants to come in and view that artwork. Diversity is what it’s all about. That’s a very big range and we have big shoes to fill! BoMA plans to do more marketing of course, but honestly, word of mouth is one area that we need to focus on.

Being involved in our community…getting people into BoMA and giving them such a great experience that they have to come back.

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

CH: Are you specifically reaching out to the GLBT community?

BG: Yes!!!YES!!!YESSSSS!!! The GLBT community is single handedly one of the most important communities that we can reach out to. Again, we had a lot of digging out to do because of the negative reputation that was generated prior to my arrival.

Meeting with Michael Daniels was actually my first order of business. Thankfully the team at Outlook was gracious enough to give BoMA a second chance. I hope we won’t disappoint you or let you down. I think we need to get involved in a number of ways, not just in advertising, but in a supporting role.

Why? Not just because it benefits BoMA, but because it creates a community. I would like to believe (call me naïve) that the GLBT community can benefit from BoMA as well, whether it’s us hosting an event or a fundraiser or contributing through our gallery.

CH: BoMA is a definite asset to Columbus and downtown. What is the company focusing on now to ensure its success? What is going to be the major focus(es) of the venue now?

BG: BoMa is an asset to Columbus and downtown.

Thank you! We are as I said, first and foremost focusing on customer service and then giving our customers the best bang for their buck. Tim Knapp

is going to be turning over our art every 6 weeks with a portion of sales going to local non profits. We need to give back to the community! Our focus is going to be using the facility to highest and best value, an event center. No need for you to book your event in a boring, white walled room when you can be at BoMA with it’s incredible ambiance and fantastic food catered by a 4 star chef!!!!

CH: I think a lot of people forget that there is a restaurant at BoMA. Can you tell us more about it – who’s the chef, what’s the food like, price point etc.

BG: Our restaurant, The Loft at BOMA, is incredible! Brian Parker, who was the chef at M and has worked at the Refectory, is truly a god in the kitchen. Not only is our food beautiful, it’s amazing! We were named one of the top 10 restaurants in Columbus by the Dispatch!

Our prices are competitive other Columbus restaurants. I think we would come in as one of the lower priced restaurants when you compare us to other “top” restaurants.

Becky Gentile

CH: What is the entertainment line up right now at BoMA? BG: The entertainment is eclectic. We have Salsa night on Thursdays with free salsa lessons starting at 8p and the music starting at 9:15p. (We are

planning on doing salsa on the patio this summer).

Friday and Saturday club nights vary with world class DJs and acts coming in. On May 23, the Ying Yang Twins are coming in, Darude, a world-class DJ from Finland, just performed several weeks ago. I am looking at booking GBLT comics. Maybe a torch singer for the restaurant in the fall. The door is wide open. Now that we have our basic team in place to run the facility, it is time for me to turn my attention to how we are going to run the club. BoMA is more than just a nightclub, it needs to be great events, great entertainment. We are just getting ready to address the club. I’ll get back to you in 6 months!

CH: What can we plan on for the summer?

BG: Our patio. We are going to have the coolest patio in Columbus. Nick Cicco is designing it. It will be a beautiful, lush space. I can’t wait until it’s done!

CH: What do you want people to know most about the Bar of Modern Art? BG: BoMA is not just pretty on the outside, but it’s pretty on the inside. (another throwback from good old mom) We deliver…customer service, product, you name it. BoMA has it all. And all are welcome!

BoMA is located at 583 E Broad St, 614.233.3000, barofmodernart.com: Hours are 5p10:30p Wed, Thu, Fri and Sat for the restaurant; club hours are Thursday from 9p -2:30p for Salsa; and 10:30p -2:30a on Friday and Saturday. Happy Hours 5p-7p; Daily dining and drink specials.

Office hours are Monday through Friday 9a-5p.

Contacts: Ric Jinkens: President, Bob Larrick: GM; Chris Lynch: Special Events; Nick Cicco: Dining Room Manager & Rebecca Gentile: Creative Director

OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 27

INTERVIEW

By Gregg Shapiro

Well-Groomed: an interview with Jai Rodriguez or “isn’t your day,” depending on whether you’re staying or going home.

GS: The episode of Groomer Has It that I saw featured a challenge in which the groomers were blindfolded and had to identify nine dogs. Is that a challenge that you could have aced?

JR: No! Not at all! I don’t really know too much about dogs, to be honest. I have two, and I know how to keep them healthy and stuff, but as far as my vast knowledge and skills with other breeds, I found myself to be quite inept when it came to knowing anything about other breeds other than my own dogs. But the show is such a great show because it does teach you about other breeds. But more importantly it’s about the experience of the groomers and the interactions that they have and the time that they share with these special dogs.

Many TV viewers got know Jai Rodriguez from his role on the groundbreaking Bravo reality series Queer Eye for the Straight Guy. As the culture guy, a sort of vague concept, Rodriguez made the best of his title and appeared to be having fun with it. For his new show, Groomer Has It, a reality competition show – think Project Runway or Top Chef, but with dogs - on Animal Planet, he takes on host duties and does a terrific job. I spoke with Jai shortly before the show had its April TV premiere.

Gregg Shapiro: How did you come to be involved with the show Groomer Has It? Jai Rodriguez: At the time when they were originally looking to lock in a name, I wasn’t available. I was doing the Ultimate Style show with Daisy Fuentes.

They had someone cast and then his schedule didn’t pan out and they reached out to me again, and I did have some free time. It was really a pleasure, because I had been looking to do something involving animals for a while, because I have two dogs. This seemed to be a natural tie-in. I was really thrilled to be a part of it. I did have to audition; it wasn’t a straight-up offer. If you can believe that (laughs), I still had to go in and do the audition thing. It was really crazy.

GS: What did the audition involve?

JR: For a hosting gig of this nature, it’s usually preparing the script copy, the opening monologue, or they’ll give an example of a challenge. Usually they make them up so that when you audition you have no idea what the show’s content will be specifically. It has something to do with dogs and it was very host-y copy. You read that and then they throw

animals at you and you have to improve a little bit to see if you’re quick on your toes and how you’d react in different situations. And then they put it on tape.

GS: Other than Groomer Has It, do you have a favorite competition show?

JR: That’s so funny. I’ll say (American) Idol for lack of originality.

GS: Reality competition shows often have specific types in the competition, such as one who’s cocky, one who’s sweet to everyone, one who’s a cry-baby…

JR: …Right!

GS: You mentioned that you have a couple of dogs and in the show that I saw, you referred to the clipped Yorkie Nemo, the Messenger Dog, as your dog. Does he really belong to you?

JR: Yeah, he’s one of my two.

GS: How did you get him?

JR: It was so interesting. I really believe that dogs find their way into your life when you really need it. It was at the height of Queer Eye, I was kind of all over the place and everything was so fast and my life felt like one big tornado and I was in the middle of it. I had a girl friend that had a litter of mixed breed Yorkie pups and she said that if I was interested in a puppy that I should let her know. I thought, “I don’t know.” And then I went to see him and he was so cute and so tiny. She said, “I’m sure he’ll be like four pounds.” I thought, well that’s not that bad. I can travel with him. Now, 11 pounds later, he’s super tall and I knew he wasn’t going to be a Yorkie Yorkie, but he’s great.

GS: … one who’s street savvy, and so on. Would you say that that is true of the competitors on Groomer Has It? JR: Yes, very true. In fact, I remember when they were first casting the show, I think they saw 20 groomers in the last round of casting and they felt that all 20 were such big, bold, colorful, rich personalities, that they had a hard time narrowing it down to the 12 that we got. They got so many talented people submitting themselves, and all of them happened to be big personalities.

GS: Did you have dogs when you were a child?

JR: No, I didn’t and I think that’s why I wanted them now.

GS: Catch phrases have also become popular on competition shows, such as Heidi Klum saying “auf wiedersehen” on Project Runway. Are there catch-phrases besides “ready, set, groom” and “leave the dog house immediately” on Groomer Has It? JR: “Every dog has its day.” And then, “this day is”

GS: Are you aware of a gay audience, not just for Groomer Has It, but for Animal Planet, as well?

JR: Yeah. You know what’s interesting is that Queer Eye had very little gay audience. Our show didn’t appeal to the mass-market gay audience. We had a hard time drawing them in. A show like Groomer Has It, because it’s competitive and it has gay con-

GS: What breed is the other dog that you have?

JR: She’s like a four pound blue Silky Yorkie. With her, I was a little more strategic. I actually found a breeder that I knew was really passionate about finding dogs good homes. A really nice woman who lives out on Long Island.

testants, and there’s a lot of creativity involved, I think it will appeal to a gay audience and I think they will tune in. I think it will be appointment television for a lot of people, but I certainly think gay people will find a lot in the show to adore.

GS: Now that Queer Eye is a thing of the past, how do you look back on the experience of that show?

JR: During, it was really difficult doing (it), because it’s not something that I do. I was a performer on Broadway and that’s how they found me. They liked my ability to capture an audience. But I can’t say that I was equipped, nor did they really have a defined outline of what my role was going to become.

So I felt a little ill at ease when I was doing the show because everyone else was truly professional in their fields. If I had been billed as “Jai – actor-singer,” then it would have been different. But with the “culture” title, it was a lot to live up to as a 23 year old.

Certainly it was a difficult and challenging experience, but when I look back now, I’m grateful for the time, because it taught me how to be a producer/host. We were in charge of cultivating our own segments in association with the producers there. I mean, I have an Emmy on my mantle from the show. So I do look back on the show with very positive memories, but during, I remember it being very difficult. It was a lot of hard work, and often times more challenging than I thought work should be. But now I feel that the time on Queer Eye made me a stronger host and certainly a host who thinks about all aspects of how this is going to translate in the final product.

GS: With the presidential election on everyone’s minds, what kinds of dogs do you think that the three main candidates – Hillary Clinton, John McCain and Barack Obama – resemble?

JR: Ooh! This is interesting. McCain, I would say that he is like a Labradoodle. The ultimate white dog, totally. I don’t think he’s snobby at all; he’s got a nice way about him. I’m not going to make him a (purebred) poodle, because he’s got a little Lab in him, kind of playful. I think that for Obama, a German Shepherd or something, because he seems really smart and intuitive. (For) Hillary Clinton, I’m going to say…Hillary’s a hard one, because I like her. She’s been in the spotlight and the media for so long, and I think she’s been a fantastic senator for New York, and was a real wife under pressure in some tough situations. I have a lot of respect for her and trying to relate her to a dog is kind of hard, but if I had to pick one, I’d have to say something allAmerican that everyone would bend down and pet because of the all-around likeability factor. I would say a Cocker spaniel, a really fun all-American dog that gets along with everybody.

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

28 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 29

SAVAGE LOVE

by Dan Savage

S AFE K ISSING, B ONDAGE B OYS, & R OBBING THE C RADLE I’m 16 and gay. I recently got into an argument with my parents over whether HIV is spread by saliva or if you can be infected during oral sex. I thought that you were safe kissing and that it’s okay to have oral sex, but that you need to use condoms for anal sex. My parents disagree and I found mixed answers searching online. I trust you, though - what do you say?

Good Gay Boy You trust me, GGB, but your parents probably wouldn’t. And the whole point of this exchange is getting you the info/ammo you need to set your parents at ease/shoot down their arguments, right? So I’m going to step aside and let some HIV prevention pros have a crack at your questions.

Think of this column as a sex-ed gangbang I’ve arranged just for you - but, um, don’t describe it to your parents that way.

“To be exposed to HIV, you would have to come in contact with someone who is HIV-positive and a fluid - semen, vaginal secretions, blood - that can transmit HIV,” says Krishna Stone, assistant director of community relations at Gay Men’s Health Crisis in New York City. “And there would also need to be a point of entry - unprotected vaginal or anal sex without condoms,” that would bring the virus into contact with mucous membranes that could absorb it.

Stone makes a great point: You can’t be exposed to HIV unless you’re having sex with someone who has HIV. The AIDS virus isn’t fire and gay men aren’t twigs; it doesn’t matter how vigorously you rub us against each other, we’re not going to suddenly burst into HIV. If you’re having sex - safe sex - with someone who’s HIV-negative like you, GGB, you have nothing to worry about on the HIV front. Well, except for your boyfriend’s truthfulness and any changes to his HIV status since his last test - which is why you should be having safe sex regardless, even if you think you’re both negative.

But let’s say you’re not with just one guy. Let’s

say you’re running around having sex - safe sex with random guys (not that I’m saying you should). Some of these guys are likely to be HIVpositive. So are you at risk of contracting HIV when you kiss poz guys?

“Kissing carries no risk of HIV transmission according to the Canadian AIDS Society’s HIV transmission guidelines,” says Rui Pires, gay men’s community education coordinator for the AIDS Committee of Toronto, “[because] saliva doesn’t transmit HIV.” So has anyone ever been infected via kissing?

“There has been a documented case of HIV transmitted through ‘deep kissing,’ [and the infection] occurred because both of those involved had current gum disease and had bleeding gums,” says Beau Gratzer, director of HIV/STD prevention at Howard Brown in Chicago. “Generally speaking, blood must be visible in the saliva in order to pose a risk of HIV transmission.”

So promise your parents, GGB, that there’ll be no deep kissing after you and your boyfriend go get your wisdom teeth pulled together, okay?

What about oral sex? What kind of risks are there when you’re blowing guys who could be positive?

“It’s reassuring to know that your parents care about your health and well-being, but they’re misinformed about how HIV is transmitted,” says Hunter Hargraves, community initiatives coordinator at the STOP AIDS Project in San Francisco.

“Oral sex is very low risk for transmitting HIV.” Low risk does not mean no risk - some men have been infected giving head. “But even though oral sex is very low risk for HIV,” adds Hargraves, “other STDs like gonorrhea and chlamydia can still be transmitted via oral sex,” giving and receiving, “and having an STD increases the potential for HIV transmission.”

What can you do to minimize the already low risk of contracting HIV when performing oral sex?

“HIV transmission is possible only if you have a cut or abrasion in your mouth or throat through

which the virus can enter your bloodstream,” says Pires. So don’t go down on anyone if you have a cut or abrasion. To avoid creating one, “no flossing or brushing 45 minutes before you go down on somebody,” says Hargraves. You can also minimize your risks, says Howard Brown’s Gratzer, “[by] not getting semen/come in your mouth, reducing your number of oral sex partners, and using a [condom] while engaging in oral sex.” I’d like to add to this list: Don’t sleep with total sleazefags, don’t be a total sleazefag yourself, and don’t allow anyone to pressure you into doing anything you don’t want to do.

And now I’m going to give the last word to one of the pros…

“It’s great that you recognize that using condoms for anal sex is the best way to prevent HIV transmission,” says Hargraves. “Score one for gay youth!”

For me and my muscle-bound bondage boy, Dan, a large part of the turn-on would evaporate if somebody were “within earshot at all times,” per your advice the other week. With all due respect to the grieving widow, Mrs. Bargy is an idiot. She left her husband tied up and alone for 20 HOURS? Dumb! When I leave my boy roped up and go to a movie, knowing that he’s working fiercely, angrily, and uselessly to get free while I’m gone, well… I’d hate to be denied that pleasure because some moron left her husband tied and gagged for a whole damn day. I leave my helpless goldfish home alone. Why not my tied-up plaything? Can’t an exception be made for those of us who actually have a brain?

Mr. Roper If you leave the house and your goldfish bowl springs a leak and your precious goldfish dies, MR, you get another goldfish. If you leave the house and your muscle-bound bondage boy accidentally works himself into a position that com-

promises his breathing and he asphyxiates, you get indicted. But, hey, you and your boy are free to take calculated risks. But if you miscalculate, MR, be prepared to shoulder the consequences.

You told Geezer In Love, the 52-year-old man who found himself falling for a younger coworker who seemed to reciprocate his interest, “For all you know, this woman, like your coworkers, thinks you’re a creepy old lech.” My husband, who’s been my partner for 14 years, is 34 years older than I am and he is not a “creepy old lech.” Try loving, sexy, accomplished, and playful! You blithely dashed GIL’s hopes, Dan, and then insulted him. I’m disappointed.

Love My Older Husband The fact that your husband isn’t a creepy old lech, LMOH, doesn’t prove that GIL isn’t a creepy old lech. My boyfriend is tall, blond, in his 30s, and he’s not a cannibal. Using your logic, we’d have to conclude that Jeffrey Dahmer - who was tall, blond, and in his 30s - wasn’t a cannibal, either.

And, come on, I never said that a younger person can’t fall for an older person or vice versa. But an older man who thinks he’s getting an interested vibe from a younger woman has to be on his guard against dickful thinking. GIL needs to ask himself if his coworker is truly interested before he does anything rash/idiotic/actionable. That’s all I was saying.

Oh, and speaking of older folks banging/dating/marrying younger folks, some weeks back I solicited letters from readers about the “campsite rule,” my rule for older folks dating younger folks (leave them in better shape than you found them).

A selection of those responses can be read at www.thestranger.com/savage/campsiterule.

Download the Savage Lovecast (my weekly podcast) every Tuesday at www.thestranger.com/savage. mail@savagelove.net

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

30 • OUTLOOK WEEKLY

ABOUT TOWN

by Chris Hayes

LIQUID WOMEN’S CLUB OPENS THIS WEEKEND Liquid, the new cafe, lounge and weekend dance club located in the Short North has itsgrand opening date this Saturday, May 17.

Doors will open to the public at 7p. The party will feature complimentary hors d’oeuvres, specialty drinks, professional dancers and live DJ entertainment. Prior to the grand opening, Liquid has scheduled an invitation-only VIP party on Friday, May 16, for everyone who signed up early on the liquidhotspot.com website.

Liquid is a full service restaurant and lounge open seven days a week, featuring Liquid Lunch specials and Happy hour + small plates. “Liquid is open to everyone for lunch, dinner and happy hour,” says Deborah

Yankulov, club owner. “Our Chef, Sherri Brunner, has put together an eclectic cafe-style menu serving delicious food at decent prices.”

Yankulov says to expect some sizzle on the weekends when the entire club will be transformed to ladie’s night every Friday and Saturday night. The space is outfitted with a complete light and sound system, including their very own Liquid lights. Sexy dancers and DJs spinning mainstream club dance music will be par t of the entertainment, along with monthly themed par ties and impromptu staff performances. “We want this to be a fun place where the ladies can come out, have a great time and feel comfor table who they are,” says Yankulov. Liquid also plans a lush outdoor

patio garden, which will be smoker-friendly.

Located at 1100 N High St in the Short North. Hours of operation: Kitchen serves 11a to 11p seven days a week. Weekend dance club is 21 and over from 9p to 2:30a every Friday and Saturday night. Liquid offers full menu service, alcoholic beverages, entertainment, music and dancing. Free nearby parking. Space available for private parties.

For additional information visit www.liquidhotspot.com or contact club management at liquidcontact@liquidhotspot.com or 614.298.3000.

THE COLUMBUS WOMEN’S CHORUS CELEBRATES MUSIC IN SPRING PROGRAM

The Columbus Women’s Chorus presents their spring program, “The Spirit of Women” on Friday, May 16, and Saturday, May 17, at 8p, at the First Unitarian Universalist Church, 93 W Weisheimer Rd. The program will range from the ardent music of the medieval abbess, Hildegard of Bingen, through traditional women’s work songs and lullabies, to the more contemporary voices of Amanda McBroom, who wrote the title

song for the Bette Midler movie, The Rose, and American composer Gwyneth Walker. The centerpiece of the program, Walker’s suite The Spirit of Women, is based on three diverse African American spirituals, but the lyrics are updated and reflect contemporary daily life that includes supermarkets, hair and a long line of feminist reformers.

“The Women’s Chorus has always championed music by women, and we are pleased to present three wonderful pieces by the excellent contemporary female American composer Gwyneth Walker,” said Artistic Co-Director Jennifer Bell.

The performance will incorporate diverse forms of artistic expression. “Both the spoken word and projected images form important parts of our program this year,” said Artistic

Co-Director Sheena Phillips. “We will welcome Connie Foster, a lifelong dame of theatre, as our principal narrator.”

The spring program of music and poetry depicting women at work, at home, alone and together, sharing love, grumbles, wisdom and singing will inspire audiences The Women’s Chorus, a supportive community of women, meets weekly from September through June to celebrate the music that has become part of their lives.

Tickets: Adults, $13 in advance ($15 at the door); Students/Seniors, $10 ($13 at the door); Children under 12, donation or free. Tickets and additional information are available online at www.cwchorus.org. The facility is wheelchair accessible and there will be interpretations from Artistic Sign Language Services.

ANTIQUES & GARDENING AT BRYN DU MAY 16-18 Bryn Du Mansion in Granville will be the site of the second annual “Antiques and Gardening at Bryn Du” the weekend of May 16-18 (2008).

The historic estate and grounds will again host about 50 highly respected antiques and gardening dealers from more than 13 states. Antiques dealers will occupy room setting booths not only in the Bryn Du Mansion, but also the adjacent Field House and Carriage House.

Dealers have been carefully chosen for quality and authenticity, and will offer a wide array of merchandise ranging from period American and European furnishings, art and clocks as

well as fine silver jewelry and Oriental rugs. In addition, garden dealers will use the Mansion’s porches, walkways and lawns to feature merchandise ranging from garden art to statuary and live plants.

Gala Preview Party - A gala preview party will kickoff the weekend’s activities 6p-9p. Friday, May 16, tickets ($60) – good for the entire weekend. Two Day Show & Sale - General admission tickets for 10a-6p. Saturday (May 17) & 11a-5p on Sunday (May 18) are $8. Proceeds benefit the Bryn Du Mansion, an Ohio, nonprofit corporation established to restore, main

tain, and preserve this National Register of Historic Places landmark in Licking County.

More information about Bryn Du is available at www.bryndu.com or by calling Executive Director Bruce Cramer at 740.587.7053.

COLUMBUS NEXT MEETING: JUNE 11, 6P-8P; LOCATION: U CAFE - 782 N HIGH ST; SPEAKER: OUT WITH OUR ELECTED OFFICIALS WWW.NETWORKCOLUMBUS.COM

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008

fin

THE LAST WORD

by Jennifer Vanasco

OUTLOOK WEEKLY • 31

SO GAY!

SHOULD WE OUT? Recently, Perez Hilton outed another celebrity.

This celebrity, an actor, is not a big name. He’s young. He’s no one with any power in Hollywood.

In fact, he’s someone who’s taken on gay roles.

He’s appeared at gay events and supported GLAAD. And the character he plays has been involved in a gay controversy not of his doing that he has born with grace and humor.

The question is: should he have been outed?

Outing has long been controversial in our community. Most of us are a bit hypocritical about it – we play the game ourselves, in small groups. Is that news anchor gay? Did you hear that this friend of a friend of a friend’s personal trainer slept with that big movie star years ago? I don’t think there was a lesbian alive who didn’t discuss Jodie Foster’s presumed gayness before she finally thanked her partner in an awards ceremony.

And yet most of us think that the kind of outing that Hilton did was bad. In an AfterElton poll, over 1,000 readers said that Perez was a “jackass and bad for the gay community” for outing this celebrity.

Only 142 readers cheered him on.

Who is right?

In some cases, outing seems pretty clear cut.

Politicians who introduce anti-gay bills and get elected by using anti-gay rhetoric when they themselves are having sex with men should be outed.

As Sen. Barney Frank once said, “People have a right to privacy, but not to hypocrisy.”

Then there are examples that are less than clear.

There are major celebrities, politicians, sports figures, journalists who are out in the community with their partners, go to gay events, and yet never reveal to the public – through interviews or by holding hands on the red carpet – that they are gay. They are semi-closeted. Their gayness is invisible to any not in the know.

Even if the public suspects, they are happy to play along with the celebrity version of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.”

These types of celebrities might not actively work against the gay community. They may be positive or neutral. And yet we know that they are such beloved figures that if they would just come out, the public would have to start adjusting its stereotypes. And young people who are far from urban centers would have more role models to look up to and more possibilities to look forward to.

If these major public figures came out, we think,

the public’s perception of homosexuality would have to widen. People who persist in thinking of us as faggots and dykes would finally have to admit that gays and lesbians come in all flavors, and that we are a people to be admired.

Maybe. We could be right about that. Or the major public figures who stay semi-closeted could be right. It could be that a homophobe’s beliefs are immutable, and when he learns a major public figure he likes is gay, instead of feeling more positively about the gay community he will simply feel more negatively about the public figure.

Yes, family members and close friends who come out often change minds. But that’s because it is hard to distance oneself from family. When you love someone, you struggle to understand them. When you simply admire someone, you can turn away.

And then there is the third case, like this newly outed celebrity (who has not, as of this writing, either confirmed or denied). These figures are both semi-closeted and semi-public, mostly unknown except to a small subset of people.

Hilton’s idea is that these gay celebrities should be treated like heterosexual celebrities. And celebrities, to him, have no right to privacy. If they have a

new boyfriend, a new girlfriend, then it is fair to reveal that.

Instead of helping keep the closet door shut, like most press organizations do when they fail to mention someone’s life partner in an obituary, or call someone else’s constant companion “a friend” in photo taglines instead of speculating that they’re “together,” Hilton says that gays and straights should be treated equally.

And yet what is good in theory isn’t always good in practice.

We all know that if this young celebrity is tagged as gay this early in his career, then he might never move forward. He might never break out of the small world he’s in into the bigger world of stardom, where he could actually do us more good. He might forever be ghettoized.

On the other hand, if he makes it anyway and is openly gay, he could help change everything.

So should Perez Hilton have outed him?

Right now, it’s impossible to tell. All we can do is wait and see what happens next.

Jennifer Vanasco is an award-winning, syndicated columnist.

Email her at jennifer.vanasco@gmail.com.

HOROSCOPES

by Jack Fertig

TAURUS (Apr 20 - May 20): What seems an absolute necessity for the home may prove to be a foolish impulse purchase. If you must spend the money, at least hold on to the receipts for a week or two. Financial discussions with family are likely to start arguments.

LEO (Jul 23 - Aug 22): Efforts to dazzle your friends may go overboard, with all the insanity of an I Love Lucy episode. Offer suggestions, run errands, and be helpful in small ways that burn lots of energy. Think ahead, step by step, before taking any initiative.

SCORPIO (Oct 23 – Nov 21): Everyone knows that Scorpios, in general, are amazing lovers. Your own personal details may leak, perhaps upsetting your public reputation, but enhancing your rep in darker quarters. Admit nothing and deny nothing - just smile and say, “Oh, is that what you heard?”

AQUARIUS (Jan 20 - Feb 18): There is such a thing as too much fun. You and your partner (or playmate) will probably disagree on where to draw that line. This requires discussion that’s as serious as the relationship. If the relationship’s not serious, finding another playmate should be easy.

GEMINI (May 21 - Jun 20): Everybody is being dangerously outspoken, and the planets are boosting your head start. Playful banter is likely to come off sharper than intended. Do your very best to keep it light, friendly, and constructive.

VIRGO (Aug 23 - Sep 22): Any conversation, especially efforts to get noticed in your work, will reveal more than you intended. Be clever and discreet, and others’ secrets may open to you.

Clean out your workspace and storage areas. Be especially mindful of potential fire hazards.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov 22 - Dec 20): Sure, you know better, Darling, you always do! But your relationships, primary and otherwise, will last longer and be much happier if you listen and consider what they say. You may even learn something!

PISCES (Feb 19 - Mar 19): It looks and feels like it’s past time for some serious housecleaning.

Approach the tasks at hand carefully and methodically. Getting half of it done well is better than zipping through and then realizing you’ve made a horrible mistake!

CANCER (Jun 21 - Jul 22): Worries about money are exaggerated. Find a quiet, meditative space far from any cash registers, and make a list of your life’s priorities and values. You will edit and revise like crazy. Don’t let that throw you. The revisions are part of the point.

LIBRA (Sep 23 - Oct 22): You can hardly avoid arguments. Stay focused on learning the truth, not insisting that you already own it. New perspectives and information can be very stimulating.

There’s a lot to learn. Try to take it in slowly and carefully.

CAPRICORN (Dec 21 - Jan 19): Accidents are more and more likely to be serious. Pushing yourself too hard is the surest route to trouble. A relaxed, alert attitude is the best preventative.

Also, be on guard against verbal slips that reveal too much about your sex life!

ARIES (Mar 20 - Apr 19): Find some space where you can speak and act on first impulse. It’s going to happen, so get it out of your system safely. Otherwise, be very careful to think about whatever you do and say. Staying out of trouble won’t be easy!

Jack Fertig, a professional astrologer since 1977, is a founding member of the Association for Astrological Networking. He can be reached for consultations at 415.864.8302, www.starjack.com, and by e-mail at QScopes@qsyndicate.com.

MAY 15 - MAY 21 2008