OutreachNC January 2019

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JANUARY 2019 | VOL. 10, ISSUE 1

- THE SECOND FIFTY ISSUE -

The Sweeter Side of Life

Serving the Sandhills & Southern Piedmont

JANUARY 2019 |

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| OUTREACHNC.COM


Take the Worry Out of Caregiving Let us provide referrals to carefully screened private-duty caregivers who work according to your needs and schedule. - Lindsey Simmons Registry Administrator

Caregiver Registry in North Carolina

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www.FoxHollowSeniorLiving.com ASSISTED LIVING • MEMORY CARE RESPITE/SHORT-TERM STAYS ©2018 Five Star Senior Living

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features JANUARY 2019

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Welcome to the Club: OutreachNC’s 2019 Book Club Picks

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Beating the Winter Blues: 5 Tips to Tackle Seasonal Affective Disorder by Amy Phariss

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Hidden Hometown Heroes: Shirley Baldwin: Parish Nurse for PUMC by Corbie Hill

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Pickin’ and Grinnin’: A Visit to Maness Pottery and Music Barn 2019 4 OutreachNC.com | JANUARY by Spencer Griffith

The Second Fifty Issue

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The Power of a Story: How Shaping and Sharing Our Stories Connects, Heals and Empowers Us All by Amy Phariss

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Self-Publishing’s New Horizon: The Nuts & Bolts of Publishing Your Own Story by Jonathan Scott

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Ringing the New Year... Dinnerbell Good Luck Foods


www.firsthealth.org/ortho

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departments January 2019

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TOP 10 NE

R E S O L UW YEAR’S T IO N S

8

9

MOR E FAM ILY TIME

22

14

LEAR N SOM THIN

advice & health

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Regional Culture by Ray Linville

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Brain Health by Karen Sullivan, PhD, ABPP

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Cooking Simple by Amy Phariss

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Eye Health by Winston J. Garris, MD

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Planning Ahead by Tim Hicks, CFP

Grey Matter Games Sudoku, Word Search & Crossword Puzzles

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The Triumphant Elder by Tim Keim, EYT 500, Yoga Therapist

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Mental Wellness by Denise O’Donoghue

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ED

AMERICANS WHO RARELY MAK E RESOLUTIONS

38%

AMERICANS WHO NEVER MAK E NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS

QUIT SMO KING

5

STAY FIT AND HEA LTHY

$ SPEN D LESS , SAVE MOR E

LOSE WEIG HT

In Verse by Barbara Stoughton

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Over My Shoulder by Ann Robson

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Generations by Barbara Hengstenberg & AOS Staff

17 %

NEW YEAR’S

64

AMERICANS WHO USUALLY MAK E NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS

FALL IN LOV E

life

Ask the Expert by Kate Pomplun, LMSW, CMC

G EXCI TING

ENJOY LIFE TO THE FULL EST

GET ORG ANIZ

10

6

HELP OTH ERS

45%

LENGTH OF RESOLUTIO MAINTAINED NS

1 WEEK

2 WEEKS

75% 71% 1 MONTH 6 MONTHS 64% 46%


Be at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let every new year find you a better man. - Benjamin Franklin

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FROM THE DESKS OF THE PUBLISHER AND EDITOR Greetings and Happy New Year from OutreachNC! As we jump feet-first into 2019, our first order of business is announcing a new voice in the OutreachNC community: Please welcome our new editor in chief, Amy Phariss. Amy comes to us from right here in Moore County and is a writer, editor, researcher, military spouse, mother of two and lover of dogs. We look forward to continuing providing the region with on-point content exploring how to navigate our best lives from 50+, whether it’s killing your mahjong game, finding the best volunteering fit for retirement, starting a second career or finally learning to duck hunt (bird dogs flopped on the bed of a truck after a day in the water). We’re excited to dig deeper, learn more and reach further this year with Amy’s vision and direction. With that.....Amy....take it away.... Thanks, Amy (and yes, we sometimes feel as if we’re writing to ourselves). Let me first say, I am thrilled to transition from a writer for OutreachNC to the magazine’s editor in chief. Having lived in Moore County several years ago and returning for good, I am excited to connect with our vibrant community and explore all of the towns, counties and coffee shops in the surrounding areas, from Lumberton to Lillington, Rockingham to Raeford, and everywhere in between. I love the message of OutreachNC, the idea that we are making the second 50 years of our lives the best years. I sat with my husband recently, by the fire, chatting about our own future. As we begin considering our second 50 and his looming retirement from military service, we’ve asked ourselves how we envision our second act. My husband says it reminds him of a football game, and we’re at half-time. “The first half of the game, you’re figuring out the other team, your own team, strengths and weaknesses,

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all that,” he said. “Then you’ve got half-time to review, think about what’s going wrong and how to fix it, look at what’s working, all that.” The second half, that’s the magic. That’s when we get to go back into the game with intention, knowing who we are, how we play and what we want. There’s a focus and determination in the second half that comes with having played the first. There’s confidence in your skills, knowledge of yourself and your team, and the excitement of realizing the clock is running down and every decision, every play matters. We want OutreachNC to be a part of those plays. We want to hear from readers, explore new ideas, meet the people in our communities who lift us up and keep us going (so often without praise or applause), and we want to do it together, as a team. Make no mistake, we’ve got plans. We’re rolling out a year-long OutreachNC Book Club this year, including reviews from Jeeves (resident literary critic and reading lounger), digging into hard-hitting issues that impact the community, and interviewing the hidden heroes among us. We’ll talk finances, health and wellness, and keep everyone in-the-loop on the best places to find cinnamon rolls, donuts and baked goods throughout the seasons. This is, in many ways, the sweet side of life, these next 50 years. We will navigate difficult subjects, endure hardship and lean on our faith. But we will also eat apple fritters, drink steaming cups of coffee, run marathons, find new purpose and lean on each other. Here’s to a year of adventure, new frontiers, finding faith and fostering the friendships that get us through the hard times and make the sweet times even sweeter. Onward and upward,


Editor-in-Chief Amy Phariss | Editor@OutreachNC.com

Publisher Amy Natt | AmyN@AgingOutreachServices.com

Creative Director Kim Gilley | The Village Printers

Marketing & Public Relations Director Susan McKenzie | SusanM@AgingOutreachServices.com

Creative & Graphic Designer Sarah McElroy | The Village Printers

Advertising Courtney Bunker | CourtneyB@OutreachNC.com 910-692-0683 ext. 141

Ad Designers Stephanie Budd, Cyndi Fifield, Sarah McElroy

Circulation 910-692-0683 | info@OutreachNC.com

Proofreader Kate Pomplun

OutreachNC PO Box 2478 | 676 NW Broad Street Southern Pines, NC 28388 910-692-9609 Office | 910-695-0766 Fax info@OutreachNC.com | www.OutreachNC.com

Photography Diana Matthews, Caitlin Penna Contributors Winston Garris, Spencer Griffith, Barbara Hengstenberg, Tim Hicks, Corbie Hill, Tim Keim, Ray Linville, Denise O’Donoghue, Amy Phariss, Kate Pomplun, Ann Robson, Jonathan Scott, Barbara Stoughton, Karen Sullivan Spiritual Advisor Jeeves

OutreachNC is a publication of The entire contents of OutreachNC are copyrighted by Aging Outreach Services. Reproduction or use without permission of editorial, photographic or graphic content in any manner is prohibited. OutreachNC is published monthly on the first of each month.

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OutreachNC.com info@outreachnc.com 910-692-9609 or mail a check to: PO BOX 2478 JANUARY 2019 | NC OutreachNC.com Southern Pines, 28388

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advice

Our Aging Life Care ProfessionalsTM will answer any aging questions you may have. ASK THE EXPERT

Email us your questions! info@OutreachNC.com

Maintaining Independence by Kate Pomplun, LMSW, CMC

&

“I live alone and have for over 40 years. I never married and do not have a local support system in place. I would like to ensure that I am able to stay in my own home and believe I have the financial resources to do that. What do I need to set up to make sure that happens?”

Maintaining independence and a quality of life in order to age in place are important to many older adults in our country. Thankfully, there are a number of services and organizations to help with this so that you do not need to call on family members in order to be taken care of at home. (Side note – even if you do have family members who can care for you at home, you may still make use of the options listed below). No one can predict the future or know what health outcomes might arise, but these are the first steps to consider in creating a plan to age comfortably in your own home:

1) Your overall health: What diagnosis or health conditions do you currently have? Talk with your doctor about how these may impact your ability to get around your home and your community. How will these conditions impact activities, including the instrumental activities of daily living (self-care tasks as well as driving, meal preparation, household chores, balancing a checkbook, etc.)? Chronic health issues may change over time, and understanding and having a plan for such changes will help you manage your health over the long term. 2) Finances: Thoroughly examine and know what services cost and what your financial resources allow for. There are many misconceptions about what Medicare covers as well as how far savings can

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realistically go. If you don’t already have a financial planner, this would be an excellent time to find and meet with one. You’ll also want to consider what, if any, benefits you qualify for such as a specialized benefit that can compensate for in-home care for veterans and their spouses, or how to utilize the long term care insurance policy you’ve been paying on all these years. 3) Consider your environment: Is your home conducive to remaining in place as your health needs change? Is it or can it be made wheelchair accessible? Is the only bathroom upstairs? Specially trained home accessibility consultants can help you determine what your space may need to make it comfortable for life as your needs shift over time.


4) Utilize technology & modern conveniences: Aging in place can only be successful if you can remain well cared for and safe in your current home. Consider an emergency response system. Many are cellular based and often have fall detection. You can keep it simple or get advanced systems with GPS tracking. Another modern convenience to make use of is ordering your groceries online and picking them up or having them delivered. There are many healthier and higher-quality home delivery meal options on the market, which you can utilize if cooking for one becomes cumbersome. 5) Delegate care: Once you know your financial resources, and as health needs change, consider hiring a caregiver or caregiving agency to provide someone who can help with the above tasks. You can even interview caregivers/agencies prior to needing assistance to get a feel for the best fit for your lifestyle and budget. (Tips for this could fill an entirely separate column). You can ease into services by hiring someone to do household tasks or transportation even when you’re still able to perform self-care without assistance, which makes the transition to higher levels of care smoother and easier to navigate. 6) Build your team: Various professionals besides caregivers can help navigate aging in place. Aging Life Care Managers™ (formerly termed geriatric care managers) are trained to assist clients in attaining their maximum functional potential. These professionals are able to address a broad range of issues related to the well-being of their client. They also have extensive knowledge about the costs, quality, and availability of resources in their communities. They can ensure that your wishes are met even if you become unable to express them yourself. You might also benefit from engaging with an elder law attorney and a financial planner, who can help manage the financial and legal intricacies of navigating the second 50 years of life. Again, no one can predict the future, but if aging in place is your goal, having a plan to do so successfully is possible. Planning ahead can definitely pay off and enable you to create the healthiest, safest and most independent environment possible. Kate Pomplun is the owner of Aging Care Solutions in Southern Pines and a contract care manager for Aging Outreach Services. She may be reached at kate@agingcaresolutionsnc.com.

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health

B R A I N H E A LT H

Minding Your Diet for Brain Benefits by Karen D. Sullivan, PhD, ABPP

With the variety of popular diets touting specific benefits, there is one brain-centric option that researchers believe provides a better option for a healthy brain and body in the MIND diet. An aptly named acronym for MediterraneanDASH Intervention for Neurodegenerative Delay, this diet combines the ideals of whole and natural foods and those lower in sodium, benefiting both the brain and heart. The MIND diet was developed by Chicago’s Rush University Medical Center epidemiologist Dr. Martha Claire Morris. Her intention was to create an easy-to-follow, evidencebased diet that lowers the risk of developing dementia. The MIND diet focuses on consuming 10 healthy food types regularly while avoiding five specific unhealthy food categories. Think Natural

According to the MIND diet, put these healthy foods at the top of your grocery list for meal planning: · Beans

· Poultry

· Berries

· Olive oil

· Fish

· Vegetables

· Green, leafy vegetables

· Whole grains

· Nuts

· Wine

Add three servings of whole grains (whole grain bread, oatmeal, brown rice, etc.) and a fresh salad to your daily routine. Grab a handful of nuts for a daily snack and a serving of berries, especially blueberries, at least twice a week. Every other day, add another fresh vegetable, especially green, leafy vegetables, like spinach, collards, kale and greens, and a serving of beans. At least twice per week, have a serving of poultry and once a week, fish. If desired, have one glass of wine per day. Know Your Limits

According to the MIND diet, make an effort to limit or stop eating these unhealthy foods, consuming no more than one serving per week, excluding butter, which is only recommended to be a tablespoon or less per day: · Butter

· Red meats

· Cheese

· Sweets/pastries

· Fried food/fast food

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Dr. Morris’s study results, which were funded by the National Institute on Aging, followed more than 900 older adults over 10 years. Participants who strictly followed the diet lowered their risk for developing dementia by as much as 53 percent. The findings earned the MIND diet the third in the Best Diets Overall by U.S. News & World Report, falling after the diets it was derived from, the DASH and Mediterranean. Although more research is needed, particularly large, populationbased studies, Dr. Morris’s MIND diet is the only established diet with evidence of reducing cognitive decline in people over 65. The MIND diet offers a realistic set of guidelines for making healthier food choices with its evidence-based research suggesting that even moderate adherence to this diet may result in a protective benefit against dementia. However, it is important to remember that, as is the case with all diets, the foods that we tout for their brain-boosting powers have to be consumed alongside other lifestyle choices to truly have a benefit, like consistent cardiovascular exercise, socialization, cognitive stimulation and spiritual connection. Dr. Karen Sullivan, a board-certified clinical neuropsychologist, owner of Pinehurst Neuropsychology Brain & Memory Clinic and creator of the I CARE FOR YOUR BRAIN program, can be reached at 910-420-8041 or by visiting www.pinehurstneuropsychology.com or www.icfyb.com.


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life

R E G I O N A L C U LT U R E

Where are the Mosquitoes? by Ray Linville

It’s so quiet outside. Yesterday as I walked along the sidewalk in front of the house, I not only inhaled the fresh, crisp air of winter, but I felt so lonesome. For weeks when I walked out the front door, I was besieged by waves of swarming mosquitoes. Jumping quickly inside a car was no respite. They had even taken up occupancy and seemed to be more abundant there than outside – and they had me captured in a confined space with no place to escape. When Hurricane Florence came with its record-breaking rain, it created the ideal breeding conditions for mosquitoes. Some areas in this region got more than 30 inches and then were overwhelmed by days and days of excessive flooding. A few weeks later, Hurricane Michael arrived with more rain that left even more standing water. Forrest Gump describes the torrents of water that we experienced this way: “Rain that flew in sideways. And sometimes rain even seemed to come straight up from the underneath.” But Forrest didn’t warn us that mosquitoes can multiply – and are huge – after such rain. Some eggs lie dormant for years until heavy rains and floods occur, and then the mosquito population spikes into the billions. Yes, billions with a “b.” Billions of mosquitoes are only half of the problem. The other half is the size. Soon after the two hurricanes hit, we were plagued with “mega mosquitoes” known as gallinippers. This species can grow 20 times larger than common mosquitoes. They were such a problem that the governor made $4 million available to several N.C. counties, including mine, for controlling the intensifying mosquito population. Unlike other counties, however, mine decided not to spray because the oversized and overpopulated mosquitoes were only a “nuisance.” What? Even when undersized and few in number, mosquitoes deserve eradication. What a difference a generation makes. Spraying for mosquitoes was once not that unusual. When I was growing 14 OutreachNC.com | JANUARY 2019

up, my hometown of Winston-Salem sent a “bug truck” at dusk around the city each week during warm weather. Chasing after the truck (and inhaling the thick, musky spray that spiraled from it) was a rite of passage and was the only activity that interrupted a nightly game of “kick the can.” The closer to the truck I got, the higher my standing among the other kids, and the kid who stayed the longest time behind the truck was the champion. Little did we know. Later as an adult, when I lived next to an Air Force base, a cargo plane flew hundreds of feet over homes as a mosquito spray spewed out its tail. (Because the spray eliminated mosquitoes, birds that dined on them no longer flew near the base’s flight patterns and weren’t a danger for being ingested by jet engines as planes took off and landed.) I had then become more cautious and dutifully kept my kids inside the house for the evening, but the next few days we enjoyed a mosquitofree neighborhood. Sprayings never continued after autumn because mosquitoes don’t like the cool days of winter. They become lethargic at 60 degrees. Some females die when the weather is cold but most just hibernate before the first frost. And their eggs? Cold temperatures don’t kill them. Remember that mosquitoes have been survivors since the ice ages and before. The eggs are waiting for the warm, wet days of spring to hatch into larvae and begin the life cycle again. January is such a beautiful month for many reasons. For me, one is that mosquitoes are few and far between. Let’s enjoy the cold days for a few more weeks “if the Lord’s willing and the creek don’t rise.”

Ray Linville writes about local connections to Southern food, history and culture. He can be reached at linville910@gmail.com .


Mozart Symphony No. 40 TUES, FEB 12 | 8PM LEE AUDITORIUM, SOUTHERN PINES

Wesley Schulz, conductor Richard Lin, violin Mozart’s renowned Symphony No. 40 astonishes with bursts of jubilation— plus, hear the Sibelius Violin Concerto performed by the Gold Medal winner of the 2018 International Violin Competition of Indianapolis.

Tickets start at just $18!*

*Price does not include tax.

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from farm to table Scott’s Table is all about quality, fresh ingredients being respected and handled carefully. Our dishes have been carefully crafted by Chef Scott and executed by his skilled team of professionals. Our pride shows in every plate we create. Our dedication and commitment to using the best of ingredients carries over into our dining rooms in the way we take care of each and every guest that comes to Scott’s Table. Pull up a chair and make yourself comfortable. We are glad you are here.

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health

E Y E H E A LT H

Glaucoma: the Silent Thief of Sight

Winston J. Garris, M.D., Glaucoma Treatment and Cataract Surgery, Carolina Eye Associates One of the most common causes for blindness in the United States is glaucoma, a disease that damages the optic nerve of the eye. The optic nerve is like the electric cable that transmits the information your eye sees to the brain for processing. A normal eye consists of two separate chambers that are connected via the pupil. The pupil is the dark circle in the center of the colored part of your eye. A healthy eye produces a fluid called aqueous humor in the back chamber where it flows through the pupil and into the front chamber where it is drained at a rate similar to the rate it is produced. In glaucoma, the ability of the eye to drain fluid is often compromised while the rate of production remains constant. As a result, the pressure inside the eye increases, leading to optic nerve damage. Optic nerve damage from glaucoma is usually permanent and can lead to devastating vision loss. It is the second leading cause of blindness in the world and is the most frequent cause of non-reversible blindness in African Americans. The problem is that glaucoma usually affects the peripheral vision first, is slowly progressive and rarely has early symptoms. As a result, most people do not realize anything is wrong until severe damage has occurred. In fact, of the three million Americans afflicted with glaucoma, only half are aware that they have the condition. There are a number of factors that increase the chance that someone will develop glaucoma. Those risk factors include age (>60), race (black or Hispanic), family history and a number of other factors that can be determined by an eye

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exam. Currently there is no cure, so early detection and treatment are critical to preventing vision loss. Individuals with risk factors need to be screened more often than those who do not. If you have any risk factors or symptoms you should be examined as soon as possible. All individuals 40 or over should receive a screening examination, and individuals 65 or older should receive an exam every 1-2 years or as frequently as recommended by your eye doctor. Treatment for glaucoma is aimed at either decreasing the amount of aqueous humor the eye produces or increasing the amount drained from the eye. The result is a decrease in eye pressure with the goal of preventing further optic nerve damage. This is usually accomplished with eye drops that need to be used daily. However, laser treatments and surgical interventions are sometimes required to prevent vision loss. New minimally invasive surgical techniques such as the iStent® are expanding the number of safe alternatives to drug therapy. If you have glaucoma, a discussion with your doctor can help determine which treatment is most appropriate for you.

Winston J. Garris, M.D. is a specialist in glaucoma treatment and cataract surgery, providing the newest medical and surgical techniques currently available. This includes procedures such as the Xen® gel stent and iStent Inject®. For more information on glaucoma and other services offered by Carolina Eye, call (800) 733-5357 or visit www.carolinaeye.com

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advice

Five Financial Adages for Thriving in Volatile Markets by Tim Hicks, CFP®

Sometimes the best, most rigorously developed financial advice is so obvious, it’s become cliché. And yet, investors often end up abandoning this same advice when market turbulence is on the rise. Why the disconnect? Let’s take a look at five of the most familiar financial adages, and why they’re often much easier said than done. 1. If you fail to plan, you plan to fail. 2. No risk, no reward. 3. Don’t put all your eggs in one basket. 4. Buy low, sell high. 5. Stay the course. 1. IF YOU FAIL TO PLAN, YOU PLAN TO FAIL. Almost everyone would agree: It makes sense to plan how and why you want to invest before you actually do it. And yet, few investors come to us with robust plans already in place. That’s why deep, extensive and multilayered planning is one of the first things a fiduciary should do when welcoming a new client, including: · A Discovery Meeting – To understand everything about you, including your goals and interests, your personal and professional relationships, your values and beliefs, how you’d prefer to work with an advisor … and anything else that may be on your mind. · Comprehensive Financial Planning – To organize your existing assets and liabilities, define your near-, mid-, and long-range goals, and ensure your financial means align as effectively as possible with your most meaningful aspirations. · An Investment Policy Statement (IPS) – To bring order to your investment universe. Your IPS is both your plan and your pledge to yourself on how your investments will be structured to best align with your greater goals. It describes your preferred asset allocations (such as your percentage of stocks vs. bonds), and is further shaped by your willingness, ability, and need to tolerate market risks in pursuit of desired returns. 18

OutreachNC.com | JANUARY 2019

· Integrated Wealth Management – To chart a course for aligning your range of wealth interests with your financial logistics: insurance, estate planning, tax planning, business succession, philanthropic intent and more. As we’ll explore further, even solid planning doesn’t guarantee success. But we believe the only way we can accurately assess how you’re doing is if we’ve first identified what you’re trying to achieve, and how we expect to accomplish it. 2. NO RISK, NO REWARD. In many respects, the relationship between risk and reward serves as the wellspring from which a steady stream of financial economic theory has flowed ever since. Simply put, exposing your portfolio to market risk is expected to generate higher returns over time. Reduce your exposure to market risk, and you also lower expected returns. There’s ample evidence that periodic market downturns ranging from “ripples” to “rapids” are part of the ride. Referencing a February 2018 report via Vanguard, from 1980–2017, the MSCI World Index recorded 11 market corrections of 10% or more, and 8 bear markets with at least 20% declines lasting at least 2 months. Such risks ultimately shape the stream that is expected to carry you to your desired destination. Consider them part of your journey. 3. DON’T PUT ALL YOUR EGGS IN ONE BASKET. At the same time, “risk” is not a mythical unicorn. It’s real. If it rears up, it can trample your dreams. So, just because you might need to include riskier sources of expected returns in your portfolio, it does not mean you must give them free rein. This is where diversification comes in. Diversification is nothing new. In 1990, Harry Markowitz was co-recipient of a Nobel prize for his work on what became known as Modern Portfolio Theory. Markowitz analyzed “how wealth can be optimally invested in assets which differ in regard to their expected return and risk, and thereby also how risks can be reduced.” In other words, according to Markowitz’s work, first published in 1952, investors should employ diversification to manage portfolio risks.


The details of how these risk/return “levers” work is beyond the scope of this article. But come what may, the desire and necessity to DIVERSIFY your portfolio remains as important as ever – not only between stocks and bonds, but across multiple, global sources of expected returns. 4. BUY LOW, SELL HIGH. Of course, every investor hopes to sell their investments for more than they paid for them. Here are two best practices to help you succeed where so many fall short: time and rebalancing. Time By building a low-cost, broadly diversified portfolio, and letting it ride the waves of time, all evidence suggests you can expect to earn long-term returns that roughly reflect your built-in risk exposure. But “success” often takes a great deal more time than most investors allow for. In the market, 10 years is not long. You must be prepared to remain true to your carefully structured portfolio for years if not decades, so we typically ensure that an appropriate portion is sheltered from market risks and is relatively accessible (liquid). The riskier portion can then be left to ebb, flow and expectedly grow over expanses of time, without the need to tap into it in the near-term. In short, time is only expected to be your friend if you give it room to run. Portfolio Rebalancing Another way to buy low and sell high is through disciplined portfolio rebalancing. As we create a new portfolio, we prescribe how much weight to allocate to each holding. Over time, these holdings tend to stray from their original allocations, until the portfolio is no longer invested according to plan. By periodically selling some of the holdings that have overshot their ideal allocation, and buying more of the ones that have become underrepresented, we can accomplish two goals: Returning

the portfolio closer to its intended allocations, AND naturally buying low (recent underperformers) and selling high (recent outperformers). 5. STAY THE COURSE. Planning and maintaining an investment portfolio are important. But even the best-laid plans will fail you, if you fail to follow them. Stay calm during difficult times, trust in your planning and stay the course! Investment advisor representative of and investment advisory services offered through Garrett Investment Advisors, LLC, a fee-only SEC registered investment advisor. Tel: (910) FEE-ONLY. Hicks Financial Partners may offer investment advisory services in the State of North Carolina and in other jurisdictions where exempted. This communication has been provided by a thirdparty, is being passed to you for informational purposes only, and is not intended as an offer or solicitation for the purchase or sale of a security. Although information in this presentation has been obtained from and is based upon sources that Garrett Investment Advisors, LLC believes to be reliable, Garrett Investment Advisors, LLC does not guarantee its accuracy and it may be incomplete or condensed. This information is not a complete summary or statement of all available data necessary for making an investment decision and does not constitute a recommendation. Investing involves substantial risk and has the potential for partial or complete loss of funds invested. Investments mentioned may not be suitable for all investors. Before investing in any investment product, potential investors should consult their financial or tax advisor, accountant, or attorney with regard to their specific situation.

About Tim Hicks, CFP®. Investment advisor representative of and investment advisory services offered through Garrett Investment Advisors, LLC, a fee-only SEC registered investment advisor. Tel: (910) FEE-ONLY.

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health

THE TRIUMPHANT ELDER

How to Stop a Cold or Flu Virus, Cold! by Tim Keim, EYT500, Yoga Therapist

Viruses are stealthy, constantly mutating little devils that resist the best modern medical science to stop them. Just as soon as science thinks it has a way to stop a virus, the darn thing mutates to defeat its new opponent. Millions of dollars are spent on the quest to stop viruses without much to show for it. This is where plant antimicrobial science from our ancient ancestors comes in handy. I recently returned from travels to California. Immunity often flags when we travel. We’re out of our routines; self-care is a bit more challenging, and sleep patterns are interrupted by different time zones etc. All of the above beset me and I started to come down with a sore throat, precursor to many a terrible debilitating viral infection. What to do? In my Ayurvedic studies I’ve learned about antimicrobial plants like ginger, turmeric and oregano. So, I made a quick trip to the local health food store in San Diego and picked up these three potent antimicrobial remedies. Twice a day I took a teaspoon of dried turmeric, half teaspoon of dried ginger mixed into some juice and chugged it down with 3 small capsules of oregano oil. This dose of oregano oil contained a standardized dosage of 21 mg of carvacrol. Within two days, the incipient sore throat faded, and I was left with only a slight cough and a bit of congestion. My energy remained high, and I lost no time enjoying myself with family and friends. So, how do plant antimicrobials out-perform the latest prescription and over-the-counter medications? These potent plants are mutating at the same rate as the microbes to protect themselves in nature. Plants, like us, are constantly under attack by these opportunistic bugs. They must quickly respond to manufacture the chemical weaponry to defeat this

assault. Turmeric is trendy just now, and for good reason. It is a potent anti-inflammatory, increases bile production in a stagnant liver, and is indicated for pain relief, arthritis and as a complimentary way to attack cancer while undergoing conventional treatments. Here’s a quote about ginger and its friend garlic that demonstrates what our ancestors knew a long time ago, “Natural spices of garlic and ginger possess effective antibacterial activity against multi-drug clinical pathogens and can be used for prevention of drug resistant microbial diseases and further evaluation is necessary.” Likewise, oregano is getting proper respect from researchers, “Essential oils of oregano are widely recognized for their antimicrobial activity, as well as their antiviral and antifungal properties. Nevertheless, recent investigations have demonstrated that these compounds are also potent antioxidant, anti-inflammatory, antidiabetic and cancer suppressor agents.” Of course, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. Using these and other herbs on a daily basis creates healthy terrain in the body that is hostile to microbial infection. Used regularly, culinary doses of these herbs keep the body clean and healthy. These powerful plant allies are at your service! Tim Keim is an IAYT certified yoga therapist, and has been teaching yoga for 15 years. Keim can be heard Saturday and Sunday mornings from 7 a.m. to 1 p.m. on 91.5-FM, WUNC. He can be reached at timkeim811@ yahoo.com. Serving residents of Scotland, Robeson, Richmond and Hoke counties in North Carolina, as well as Marlboro, Dillon and Chesterfield counties in South Carolina.

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www.ScotlandHospice.org


AFTER THE DIAGNOSIS January 23rd | 2:30 - 4 P.M. Speaker: Crystal Fowler, AOS Care Management Discover local resources available to help you and your family navigate the many stages of dementia

Wh

a

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an

He lp?

155 Hall Ave. Southern Pines

o W E Do T

Questions?

Join us for monthly FREE programs. Memory Cafe is a welcoming place for individuals with Alzheimer’s disease, dementia, brain disorders and mild cognitive impairment and their family member or friend.

910.585.6757 info@aosfcare.org

OutreachNC.com AOSFCare.org JANUARY 2019 |

AOS & Friends Care is a 501(c)3 nonprofit organization

21


life

COOKING SIMPLE

Taco Soup by Amy Phariss

As I sit here in the editor’s office, magazines and papers piled chin-deep on my desk, I look out the window and see deceptively blue skies. I say they’re deceptive because as soon as I step outside, the chill of a January morning will bite at my skin and remind me: Amy, you left your coat at home. I’m like a toddler that way, always flying out the door without proper attire: mittens, a scarf or a coat. I somehow think a cardigan sweater and positive attitude are all I need to keep warm, and truth-be-told, on most North Carolina days, these get me by just fine. But January? No. We need warmth in January, even in the south, even in the land of perpetual golf, galloping down horse trails, jumping out of airplanes and barreling into the parking lot of any coffee shop that will serve up a proper shot of espresso. So, if I’ve forgotten my coat, misplaced a mitten or wrongfully thought ballet flats are appropriate footwear for winter, I try my best to compensate with warm food. To that end, I love nothing more than coming home to the smell of a strong stew or soup simmering away in a slow cooker, ready for just the moment when I’ve poured a glass of wine and set my feet by the fire. A slow cooker soup should be easy to throw together, full of hearty ingredients and versatile enough for pantry ingredients. As a bonus, if the rest of the family likes it, I consider it a solid win. This is my go-to, mid-winter, good-for-a-gray-day soup, which my kids love, my husband devours and which lasts us at least two solid meals. It’s easily reheated and can be dabbled with and adjusted for taste.

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Aunt Tammy’s Taco Soup

*from Aunt Tammy, on my husband’s side, who lives in Texas and is, therefore, a legitimate source for such a recipe.

Living Simply Is Simply Marvelous At Scotia Village

Ingredients: 2 cans corn 2 cans tomato sauce 2 cans beans (pinto, kidney or 1 of each) 2 lbs. browned hamburger (or turkey) 1 package taco seasoning 1 package ranch dressing dry mix Directions: Brown the meat and drain. Add the canned ingredients and seasoning packets, and dump it all into a crockpot. Do not drain the beans or the corn. Cook in the slow cooker for 2-3 hours on high or all day on low. Serve in a bowl with toppings or over rice. Notes: Sometimes I omit the corn if the kids have been angels and I feel like catering to their discerning palates. Sometimes, I try different beans. I go heavy on the meat side of the meat-to-bean ratio, and I always use ground beef, but I’ve enjoyed it with ground turkey as well. In our household, we top our bowls with sour cream, grated cheese, avocado, salsa and cilantro. We also use Frito’s Scoops as spoons because we are good people. Also, this recipe freezes and reheats well, which is a blessing when you get tired of the entire pot. Just pop it into a Ziploc bag, store it in the freezer and feel blessed when, a few weeks later, dinner means defrosting and nothing more. We’d love to hear how you made it your own or if you’ve been eating taco soup all your life and forgotten, entirely, how good and decent it really is on a brisk January evening.

If you’re looking for a way to simplify your life and retire in ease, an apartment at Scotia Village Retirement Community is the perfect choice. With apartment floorplans ranging from 400 to 1,450 square feet, Scotia Village combines convenience with comfort, to provide the room you need and the lifestyle you want. Best of all, you’ll be part of an active community where friendships blossom. We invite you to see our newly designed studio apartment, staged by Parker Furniture. To arrange a visit, call us at 910-266-5024.

LOVE WHERE YOU LIVE

S C OT I AV I L L AG E . O R G | 9 1 0 - 2 6 6 - 5 0 2 4 2 2 0 0 E L M AV E . , L AU R I N B U R G , N C A PRESBYTERIAN HOMES, INC. COMMUNITY

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health

M E N TA L W E L L N E S S

Take Charge of Your Mental Wellness – A Checklist for a New Year by Denise O’Donoghue, Biblical Counselor

Mental wellness, or mental health, is defined by the World Health Organization as, “…a state of well-being in which the individual realizes his or her own abilities, can cope with the normal stresses of life, can work productively and fruitfully, and is able to make a contribution to his or her community.” Certainly, as we age our abilities can become more limited. When thinking about mental wellness, it is best to concentrate on what you can do, not what you may no longer be able to do. If you once had a job but are now retired, perhaps you are tempted to think you have lost your ability to work productively, and fruitfully. In reality, you now have freedom to choose how you would like to exert your energies and with whom. By making a few intentional choices, 2019 can be a year you thrive, not just survive. Here are a few ideas to consider: ✓✓Make a decision to live in the present When most of our thoughts are geared toward the past, it can foster feelings of sadness and depression. When most of our thoughts are geared toward the future, it can promote anxiety. Instead, keep your thoughts focused on today and simple pleasures. Read a book, sit outside in the sunshine, or do whatever brings you pleasure. ✓✓Make plans to engage socially with others Visit a friend or family member. Invite someone to your home for coffee or tea. Call friends and invite them to go out to lunch or dinner. Be active in your faith community. ✓✓Make necessary changes to take good care of your body How we treat our bodies impacts our mood. Make sure you are getting enough sleep each night. Eat healthy meals. Limit your sugar intake. Go for a walk. ✓✓Think - Exercise your brain You have probably heard the old adage, “use it or lose it”. Of course, we tend to think of this in regards to our muscles, but our brains need exercise too. Work puzzles or better still, engage socially with others by playing bridge, chess or some other mentally challenging game.

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✓✓Look for ways to care for others Giving of ourselves is a great way to improve our outlook on life and give us a fresh perspective on the world. Call a neighbor and tell him you were thinking about him. Ask how he is doing. Ask your pastor for a list of church members who could use a little bit of cheer and offer to write a note or send a card. You will be showing care for your pastor at the same time by lightening his load a little. ✓✓Keep in touch with those far away Perhaps you have moved to be closer to family but left friends in faraway places. Don’t let that stop you from reaching out. With today’s technology options, you can sit in front of a computer or smart phone and talk with a friend as if you were sitting across from him. ✓✓Do something you always wanted to do Now is the time to write that novel, research your family tree, or learn to play a musical instrument. Having a new project can give you direction for the days ahead. ✓✓Sign up to be a volunteer This may be the perfect time to invest your gifts and talents by volunteering in your community. When you volunteer, you replace thinking about yourself and your problems with thinking of others. This is a proven way to boost your mental wellness. ✓✓Write about your faith journey Take the time to capture the moments in your life where you grew in your faith. Here are a couple of questions to get you started: At what moments have you felt closest to God? In what ways have you seen Him work in your life? What a wonderful legacy to leave for your loved ones! Pick one or two of these ideas or come up with some of your own. Embrace all the many things you can do and get started. Here’s to a thriving new year! Denise O’Donoghue is a biblical counselor in Raleigh and a former professor for Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary. She is very blessed to have four living generations to share life with. You can reach Denise at mzdod@bellsouth.net


TOP 10 NEW YEAR’S

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QUIT SMOKING

LEARN SOMTHING EXCITING

STAY FIT AND HEALTHY

5 $

LENGTH OF MAINTAINED RESOLUTIONS

SPEND LESS, SAVE MORE

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GET ORGANIZED

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FALL IN LOVE

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45%

AMERICANS WHO

LOSE WEIGHT

2 WEEKS

1 MONTH 6 MONTHS JANUARY 2019 | OutreachNC.com 25

75% 71% 64% 46%


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Welcome to the Club: OutreachNC’s 2019 Book Club Picks

Each year, one of my first resolutions is to read more. In particular, I want to read more books. I read a fair amount online each month, scrolling through my phone or glued to a computer screen, but sometimes I miss the texture and depth of a good, old-fashioned book. This year, I am committing to reading more offline than I do online, to sitting beside the fireplace with a book in hand, to turning on the bedside lamp and picking up a hardcover, to chatting with friends not about the latest Facebook dog video but about whether or not I loved Where the Crawdads Sing or what I thought about Barbara’s Ehrenreich’s Natural Causes: An Epidemic of Wellness, the Certainty of Dying, and Killing Ourselves to Live Longer. Who doesn’t want to talk about that? To this end, we’ve decided over here at ONC to establish a book club and invite readers along as we dish on everything from Kent Haruf ’s tale of two widows finding love to Nora Ephron’s reflections on life, to Leslie Jamison’s hard look at the story of addiction. A mixture of fiction and non-fiction, 2019’s ONC Book Club has stories of all kinds including memoirs, a collection of short stories, bestselling novels and award-winning nonfiction. We hope you’ll join us as we explore all of these different stories, choosing our favorites, trying to mask disdain for stories we secretly (and no-so-secretly) hate and stopping our friends on the street to say, “You’ve got to read this book!” To keep it even-Steven, we’ve created a list of 10 books that are as new to us as they may be to you, so we’re all in this literary boat together. Below are minimal plot descriptions and thoughts of each book, as we’re aware that giving a story away before the reading kills some of the joy in picking up a new book without any notion other than the tingle of excitement as we open the cover and dip our toes in the water. With that note in mind, in the order to be read, OutreachNC’s 2019 Book Club picks are:

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1. Our Souls at Night – Kent Haruf (February) Set in fictional Holt, Colorado (the beloved home of Haruf ’s extraordinary Plainsong), Addie Moore and Louis Waters are neighbors and widows. Having known each other for decades, they find themselves with the opportunity to learn more about each other, themselves and their own histories as their lives unfold in unexpected ways during this poignant novel of family, loss and the love that exists between it all. As his last novel, Our Souls at Night is a brilliant finale and homage to Haruf ’s own personal love story. Having read Plainsong and Eventide, and having loved each of them, we’re excited to head back to Holt and experience the richness of Haruf ’s characters juxtaposed against the stark landscape and social backdrop of small town America. 2. Natural Causes: An Epidemic of Wellness, the Certainty of Dying, and Killing Ourselves to Live Longer – Barbara Ehrenreich (March) Ehrenreich’s New York Times bestseller explores the wellness industry, the inevitability of death and the price we pay when we focus on living longer rather than better. Ehrenreich explores how our bodies age, how much control we really have over the aging process, the illusion of control we’re given through powerful industries (beauty, wellness, fitness) and how we prepare for the final years of our lives. Ehrenreich is the author of more than a dozen titles including the New York Times bestseller Nickel and Dimed, an exploration on the idea of making ends meet on minimum wage in America. She writes with sharp wit and social commentary, so we’re looking forward to what Ehrenreich has to say about aging in a culture obsessed with the concept of avoiding growing older. 3. The Little French Bistro – Nina George (April) From Nina George, the New York Times bestselling author of The Little Paris Bookshop, The Little French Bistro is the charming tale of Marianne, a woman stuck in an unhappy marriage. At midlife, Marianne decides to leave the comfort of what she’s known and strike out on her own, leaving Paris for Britanny, where she meets a collection of colorful characters and is able to find the room again to explore the parts of herself which have been dormant for so many years. We’re going into this novel knowing it’s light-hearted reading with an uplifting message. If we love it, we may go back and read The Little Paris Bookshop for another jolt of easy reading and lovely imagery. 4. I Remember Nothing and Other Reflections – Nora Ephron (May) From 2011, Nora Ephron’s book of reflections, observations and wisdom was her first since the wildly popular I Feel Bad About My Neck. With chapters including ‘Who Are You?’, ‘My Life as an Heiress’ and ‘I Just Want to Say: The World is Not Flat’, Ephron promised to entertain us, provoke thought and cause us to question truths about our own lives we’ve not before considered. The slim book reads like a quasi-memoir, logging in at a mere 135 pages and ends with a chapter titled ‘The O Word’. Who can resist that? We’re looking forward to the conversations that come up around the office while reading this one. 5. Where the Crawdads Sing – Delia Owens (June) First things first, this novel is set in North Carolina. How could we not read it? And...it’s a New York Times bestseller.... and it’s on Reese Witherspoon’s own book club list. Did we have a choice? Where the Crawdads Sing is described as perfect for fans of Barbara Kingsolver’s novels, so count us in. Delia Owens tells a story of a mythical ‘Marsh Girl,’ a young woman raised by nature, looking for love and suspected of murder. Intrigued? We are. We’re feeling like Where the Crawdads Sing is the perfect pick to start off summer in full-swing.

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6. The River Runs Through It and Other Stories – Norman Maclean (July) Norman Maclean’s collection of stories is described by the Chicago Tribune as, “As Beautiful as anything in Thoreau or Hemingway.” Are those not compelling comparisons? Short stories don’t get enough love in modern fiction, but there is a simple, tight, tense beauty in the craft of short story when it’s done well, and by all accounts, Maclean does it well. His title novella, A River Runs Through It, is recognized as an American classic and Maclean as one of our finest writers. Jeeves is especially excited about this pick, as he knows a thing or two about the wild. We’re excited to hear how Jeeves feels about Maclean’s descriptions of fly-fishing, logging and the beauty of life beyond our front doors. Also, Robert Redford writes the foreward. Need we say more? 7. The Light of the World: a Memoir – Elizabeth Alexander (August) Yet another New York Times bestseller, Elizabeth Alexander’s memoir is described as brave, beautiful and full of grace. Poet and Yale University professor, Alexander writes a memoir describing the existential crisis she faced after the unexpected death of her husband. Left with two sons for whom she must care, Alexander writes of her marriage, life after her husband’s death and the ultimate blessings of life even in the experience of loss. We’re excited to read what we hope proves to be a thoughtful, inspiring memoir of survival and hope. 8. Who Is Vera Kelly? – Rosalie Knecht (September) After all of this thought and reflection, we felt a good ol’ mystery was called for. Who is Vera Kelly? gets heaps of praise. Described as hilarious, subversive and a page-turner, we’re not quite sure what to expect with Knecht’s mystery, which is what makes it all the more exciting to dig into this book. Set in New York City in 1962, Vera Kelly is enlisted by the CIA for all sorts of Cold War antics. As the edgiest, most renegade choice on our list, this might be the book we love most or the one about which we have to answer to Jeeves. We’ll see! 9. The Recovering: Intoxication and Its Aftermath – Leslie Jamison (October) The Recovering questions what we know, believe and think we understand about addiction. Writer Leslie Jamison (novelist, essayist and frequent contributor to The Atlantic, Harper’s and a contributing writer for the New York Times Magazine) explores addiction from the perspective of someone who has been through it and as a member of a society in which it is rampant. She writes about class, culture, illness, criminality and the stories we tell, both individually and collectively, about addiction. Addiction, like all things, has a story, and Jamison gets to the heart of what that is. We’re excited to read The Recovering, even bearing in mind it may be difficult but hopefully rewarding. 10. Beneath a Scarlet Sky: a Novel – Mark Sullivan (November) Mark Sullivan’s novel, Beneath a Scarlet Sky, has over 21,000 5-star reviews on Amazon. Set during World War II, and based on a true story, Sullivan’s hero is a young teenage boy named Pino who wants nothing to do with war and only wants to continue his peaceful, quiet life in Milan. When his home is destroyed by bombing, he’s forced into a world he never imagined, a tangle of events that leads him to the position of driving one of the Third Reich’s top commanders. A story of war, love, loyalty and ultimately triumph, Beneath a Scarlet Sky is just the sort of book we need to end on - strong, beautiful and already fully vetted by 21,000 other readers! Also, word on the street is, if you enjoyed All the Light We Cannot See, The Nightingale or Unbroken, you’ll love this one. We’re excited to get lost in this story and bracing ourselves for tears. Kleenex boxes will be at the ready. That’s it. Those are our 10 choices for the year, giving us some breathing room for the holidays and hopefully enabling heaps of thoughtful discussion, critique and plain old good reading fun. We can’t wait to hear what you all think about the choices, the characters, the stories and the ideas explored in each of the books. Here’s to a year of more reading, more adventure and more time soaking in a hot bath and turning yet another page.

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Beating The Winter Blues: 5 Tips to Tackle Seasonal Affective Disorder by Amy Phariss

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S

everal years ago, the Army moved our family from North Carolina to Pennsylvania for one lone year, so my husband could attend school. I was excited to live in a new, charming town, have my husband around more often with a more flexible schedule and take the kids hiking along the Appalachian Trail. We moved in July, during the hot, muggy summer of the east coast, and by September, I was settled into the rhythm of a new place. In November, I began noticing some gray skies, a bit of rain, and a darkening that seemed to creep in through the cracks of the 1920s home we rented in downtown Carlisle and settle in. By December, I knew something was wrong. The skies weren’t clearing. There was nothing blue in my world…except maybe my mood? As the winter wore on, I began noticing I felt off. I was restless, unable to make decisions, and cranky. I felt a low-level depression I couldn’t shake off. I had no ‘reason’ for feeling this way. My family was healthy and happy. My husband’s schooling gave us more time together. I’d made a handful of lovely friends in our new neighborhood.

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Still, I couldn’t escape a feeling that left me fatigued, angry and, well, depressed. SUDDENLY, THE DAYS SEEMED REALLY LONG, and the idea of getting outside, talking with friends or attending social functions became overwhelming. Still, as the snow continued falling, I shrank further into myself until one day I came across an article on Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD). As I read, I saw myself in the description, and by the end of the article, I knew I was suffering not from a lack of gratitude or Chronic Fatigue Syndrome but from SAD. With this knowledge, and feeling hopeful that if I could identify what was wrong, I could fix it, I got to work helping myself tackle my winter blues. Here is what I learned, what worked for me, and options to address SAD and enjoy, rather than endure, the winter season. The National Institute of Mental Health defines Seasonal Affective Disorder as “a type of depression that comes and goes with the seasons, typically starting in the late fall and early winter and going away in the spring and summer.” According to researchers Kathryn A. Roecklein and Kelly J. Rohan, in their 2005 publication “Seasonal Affective Disorder: Overview and Update,” “An estimated 10 to 20 percent of recurrent depression cases follow a seasonal pattern.” While depressive symptoms associated with SAD can occur in the summer months, the majority of cases are reported in the winter. Symptoms of major depression often mirror those of SAD in the winter months and can co-occur with SAD-specific symptoms. The symptoms of Seasonal Affective Disorder in winter include: · Low energy · Hypersomnia (excessive daytime sleepiness/difficulty staying awake, excessive sleeping) · Overeating/Weight Gain · Craving foods high in carbohydrates · Loss of interest in socializing (i.e. hibernating) Less common symptoms include: · Poor appetite/weight loss · Irritability · Insomnia · Anxiety · Feelings of restlessness · Periods/episodes of violent behavior

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If you find yourself or someone you love experiencing some or all of these symptoms, it may be time to take proactive steps to beat the winter blues and stop SAD in its tracks. Here are Five Ways to Beat Seasonal Affective Disorder:

1

Check Your Vitamins

The National Institute of Mental Health notes that people who experience SAD may produce lower levels of vitamin D, which has been associated with low levels of depression. With less sunshine in winter months, vitamin D levels can drop in some people. Have your levels tested with your general practitioner and supplement if necessary. For many people, a simple daily vitamin can make a measurable difference in symptoms associated with SAD and improve quality of life substantially during these darker months.

2

Go Toward the Light

Blue light boxes have become a go-to treatment for SAD over the past decade. Supported by research and recommended by doctors, blue light boxes mimic outdoor light, which researchers believe helps increase chemicals in the brain to raise moods and lessen depressive symptoms. Experts recommend using light boxes within an hour of waking for approximately 20 to 30 minutes. Sit anywhere from 16 to 24 inches from the box, and keep your eyes open without looking directly into the light. Light boxes come in various shapes and sizes, so be sure to find one that fits your space and needs. Also, look for boxes made specifically for SAD, and be sure to check levels and intensity of light before choosing the right box for you. Also, be sure to get outside, even on cloudy or dreary days. Exposure to UV light, which happens even under cloud cover, helps boost serotonin and improve mood. While it can be tempting to curl up inside with a movie or crossword puzzle, a walk around the block can help balance the brain chemicals and lift our moods. I purchased a blue light online, set it up at the kitchen table and gave myself a little light therapy each morning while sipping coffee and basking in blue. It did make a noticeable difference, as the days passed, and I keep it tucked away in my closet here in North Carolina for longer periods of rainy days.

3

Get Moving

Exercise is good for just about anything, from the condition of our hearts to the functioning of our brains to the stability of our moods. Exercise gets our hearts racing, our blood pumping and our feel-good endorphins flowing. Increased endorphins have a positive impact on mood, helping us feel more energized, calmer and happier. While enduring the dreary Pennsylvania winter, I took up tennis lessons (thankfully provided indoors) to get my body moving and to engage my brain in learning a sport. The difference it made in my daily life was noticeable, and I felt stronger, healthier and happier after each lesson and as the weeks passed by. I continued playing through the remainder of our time up north, grateful to have a physical outlet to get me out of the house, rain or shine. Moving my body and using my brain simultaneously was a huge part of addressing my SAD and giving me some much-needed zest through that long winter.

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4

Try Therapy

Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) has been adapted and used to effectively treat SAD. Known as CBTSAD, this therapeutic treatment helps identify and change behaviors and thoughts associated with depression including negative thoughts. Behavioral activation, another CBT technique, helps those suffering with SAD identify and pursue enjoyable activities to combat depressive symptoms both indoors and outside. Talk with your doctor for a referral to a therapist or counselor who may be able to provide therapeutic interventions to alleviate SAD’s symptoms. During my own bleak winter and struggle with SAD, I saw a therapist a few times to talk through my symptoms, discuss a plan for getting out of the house and identify how I could help myself feel better. The therapy was helpful for me, and I stuck with the plan, helped myself up and out of the house and felt relief in having addressed my feelings with a professional.

5

Consider Medication

Though it is possible to combat SAD through many of the tips above, medication is another avenue to consider when depressive symptoms become overwhelming or do not get better with other treatments. Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors (SSRIs) are used to treat SAD and can significantly improve symptoms. The first medication approved by the FDA to treat SAD is Wellbutrin XL (bupropion HCL extended-release tablets), but other medications are also prescribed. My doctor in Pennsylvania was prepared to put me on medication if my symptoms weren’t eased by other activities, and I was grateful to have that option available to me when the snow was falling, the streets were coated in ice and I sat by the front window feeling restless and low. Though I didn’t end up needing the medication, it’s yet another tool in the proverbial toolbox I am aware exists and will explore should the need ever arise again. Many doctors prescribe medication before symptoms begin, in anticipation of SAD in patients who have experienced seasonal depression in the past. Make an appointment with your doctor to discuss SAD symptoms and if medication may be an option to help.

By educating myself about SAD, using the tips above and being gentle with myself through the process, I was able to lift myself out of a winter depression and enjoy the rest of our time in Pennsylvania. I volunteered at my kids’ school, attended book club meetings, met friends for coffee and threw parties of my own. As spring came, and the skies began shifting to blue, the flowers literally bloomed and the weather brightened, I knew I’d gotten through the worst of it and would be okay. Now that we’re back in North Carolina, I find myself seeing the same symptoms arise when we get a few back-to-back days of rain, when the sky is dark before dinner is served and when the skies are covered in clouds. When I begin to feel fatigued, sad or disoriented, I go back to what helped me before, grabbing my blue light from the closet, getting outside for a brisk walk with our dog and reminding myself that these feelings won’t last forever. Sometimes, just knowing what’s wrong and taking steps to make it better, however small and however slow they may be, makes all the difference. If you find yourself or a loved one struggling with the symptoms of Seasonal Affective Disorder, try these tips to help ease the effects of the darkening skies, colder weather and lack of sunshine that leaves some of us wanting to get back in bed, pull the covers closer to the chin and hibernate through the winter months.

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Hidden

HOMETOWN HEROES:

SHIRLEY BALDWIN. PARISH NURSE, PINEHURST UMC by Corbie Hill | Photography by Diana Matthews When David Beam’s wife went into labor with the couple’s second child, it was 4 a.m. on a Saturday, but Beam knew who to call. The senior pastor of Pinehurst United Methodist church called Shirley Baldwin, who stayed with the couple’s two-year-old, allowing them to rush to the hospital. This is simply what Baldwin does. As Pinehurst UMC’s parish nurse, she’s there to help -- no matter the hour, no matter the need.

“She has journeyed with hundreds of church members and non-church members alike through sickness, grief and uncertainty -- offering them a calm presence and a word of hope every step of the way,” Beam writes in an email. Baldwin accompanies parishioners to their surgeries. She visits hospitals and does follow-up care. Parishioners call, describing their symptoms and asking if they should see a doctor. She cooks for people, and she’ll drive them to their appointments -- even if it means a trip to Raleigh or Chapel Hill. Baldwin takes her calling as parish nurse very seriously. And she does not sit still. Cathy Wibbens compares her to the Energizer Bunny. “We feel very fortunate as a church to have Shirley,” says Wibbens, Pinehurst UMC’s ministry assistant. “We say she’s part of our staff. She’ll tell you that she just volunteers, but she’s an integral part of what we do.” Yet what drives Baldwin? How did the little girl from rural Columbia, Kentucky with a passion for nursing grow up to travel the world, working as a coronary care and ICU nurse and nursing instructor? Why, when she retired, did she not step away from her beloved job, but lean into it as a parish nurse and a Moore Free Clinic volunteer? And how does a woman who survived the September 11th attacks move forward with grace and confidence, tirelessly helping others? “As a pastor, I couldn’t be more thankful to have Shirley as part of my church community,” says Beam. “As a friend, I couldn’t be more thankful to have her as part of my life.” Baldwin sat down with OutreachNC to speak about her life. Our conversation has been edited for length. Corbie Hill: When did medicine first appeal to you? Shirley Baldwin: At the age of six. At that time I realized that I really wanted to be a nurse, so I spent my high school years studying mainly sciences. I came from a very poor background — my parents could not afford to send me to college -- so the only way I could get to a college was to make sure I had good enough grades to get a scholarship. After I graduated from high school I applied to Midway Junior College. It was a girls’ school that was going to start a two-year nursing program, which would then be a part of the University of Kentucky. They did not get a nursing program; therefore I applied to Kentucky Baptist School of Nursing. JANUARY 2019 |

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I applied there and was turned down because they said I didn’t make the grade. A week before I was going back to Midway Junior College, I got a call from Kentucky Baptist saying they apologize for the miscommunication, but they had given me the pre-med exam instead of the nursing exam. After they reevaluated, they decided I would be a good candidate for the school. So they gave you an exam that was how many levels above what you were applying for? Several (laughs). After that, I went to Kentucky Baptist, was there for three years. My next to the last rotation was in the intensive care unit. I really enjoyed it except that one of my instructors at that time said that I would never make an ICU nurse. I was too compassionate. That didn’t sit real well with me. After graduation I started working in the ICU. That doesn’t sound like the kind of quality one would perceive as being negative. I don’t know if she was being negative or if she was pushing me. Anyway, she pushed the right button because I started in intensive care. From then on, throughout our travels, I alternated between coronary care and intensive care. What drew you to the ICU? It was challenging. I guess I was an adrenaline junkie at that time. People could come in and they were on death’s door. The next minute, they were sitting up, laughing, talking, carrying on. You moved all over the country because your husband was in the Air Force. What were some of the places you lived? We lived in Illinois, New Mexico, California, Florida, Alabama, Virginia, England, and then we kept bouncing from Alabama to Virginia. My husband went to the War College and then spent time in the Pentagon and then back to Alabama, where he was on faculty and I, after I got my master’s, was on faculty there as well. What were some of your favorite places? My favorite place actually was England. It was unique. They spoke English, but not English. The neat part about it was I got to travel. Being from a small town of 1300 people that had never been out of the state of Kentucky, when we were in England I was able to visit the continent as well. It was just phenomenal to see history living. We visited all the cathedrals in England. I got to go to Greece and Corinth. 38

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I stood on the rock where Peter preached. THAT WAS FASCINATING. We actually were in Russia in 1976, during the time of pure communism, and my husband had just received his top-secret clearance. We were followed, and the reason we know we were followed is because when we took pictures, there was the same man in every picture, regardless of the day. During my travels I had been working on my bachelor’s degree. For 12 years I had been trying to get my bachelor’s. Each time you moved, each university had their own ideas for nursing, so I lost all my credits. When we got to Alabama, Auburn had what they called an RN mobility program, which meant that if you took 23 credit hours a quarter, you could graduate within a year. I decided to do that, and that’s when I graduated from Auburn with my bachelor’s in nursing. That sounds pretty intense. It was. Very intense. Then my husband was transferred back to Washington, DC where he worked at the Pentagon and I worked at Fairfax Hospital. Then he was transferred back to Alabama to be on the faculty as one of the directors, and I decided that I was going to get my master’s. I said, “Look, I have to have my master’s in a year,” and they said “No, we don’t do master’s in a year.” I said, “You gotta understand. I move around a lot and I want my master’s in a year.” I had to get special dispensation, so I got my master’s in education human performance, which is exercise physiology, in a year. You don’t sound like the kind of person who puts aside down time. You sound like you go, go, go -- or at least at that time. Is that accurate? (Laughs) Yes. After that, we moved back to Washington and my husband went to the Pentagon and I went to the US Capitol and spent three years there, working in the attending physician’s office, taking care of the members of congress, both House and Senate. What years would those have been? Oh, ‘87, ‘88, ‘89. After that, there was the Pentagon. I was in the Pentagon on 9/11, working in their clinic. I was the nurse educator.


Did you hear the...

How soon did you find this church?

No. Did not hear anything, because where the plane hit was not on the river side. The clinic was on the river side. The plan was for the plane to hit in the center of the Pentagon, which would have taken out pretty much everything. But I was involved with triage during that time.

Immediately.

The plane hit about 9:30 that morning and I did not reach my family until late afternoon around 3:00. They didn’t know if I was alive or dead. My husband was at the Pentagon at that time. He was working as the CIO director at the National Defense University, and he saw the flames. It was quite intense. How do you deal with that? Faith. God was in the midst of all of that. I truly believe that because otherwise I would not have been able to do what I did. I believe He was there during that time and caused the plane not to go where it needed to go. I was in a position to help a gentleman who was badly, badly burned ... and got him to the hospital, who is now a senator in Texas. God was there. I kept trying to get to the other side [of the Pentagon], but God had another plan for me. I was to be there to help this gentleman to get to the hospital because he wasn’t finished with his life yet. Through a lot of prayer and knowing, having a good faith is the only thing that kept me comfortable with that. How did you end up here? My husband likes golf and we had good friends here we had been coming to visit. He liked the area, so we bought a lot. We moved down in ‘05.

The second or third Sunday we were here after we moved, I talked to Allen Bingham, who was our minister at the time, and said, “You know, I really would like to be a parish nurse here.” Right before we left Fairfax, we were members of the Fairfax United Methodist Church, and I had heard about parish nursing. [I] didn’t know anything about it, didn’t know why I started reading about it. It was just something that kind of gripped me, and I think, too, that is something we call a God wink -- He was moving me in a direction He wanted me to go. So I got the position there, 20 hours a week, paid and approved, and then we moved here. What does a parish nurse do? Parish nursing is a part of the American Nurses Association. It has its own entity, so we’re not out in left field somewhere. You have to be certified, and I went through a program through Duke to get my certification. Allen helped me through that.

I call it a bridge between religion and nursing. What you do mainly is, people who go to the doctor’s office, you sit there, you talk to them, you listen mainly, while the doctor is giving them information. Once you leave, then you heard what the doctor said. Sometimes when a person gets a bad diagnosis like cancer or ALS or any of those things that are devastating, your mind shuts down. You have no idea what the doctor said. Therefore, I could be with them, hear what the doctor said, and after they have gotten over the shock phase I can explain to them what goes on.

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With our church members, I explain the medication, explain treatments. When they’re going for surgery, whether it’s 5 a.m. or 6 p.m., I will go and have prayer with them before they have surgery. I do hospital visits. I do nursing home visits. If they want me to come into their home, I will go into their homes. I have office hours every Wednesday from 8:00 until noon here. People are allowed to come in here and talk to me about anything. It’s all confidential -- nothing is sent out into the world. [Parish nursing is also] helping them through a grieving process. Being with them when their family member is dying, or being with them after a death, at that time.

It’s religion and medicine combined. You also volunteer at a number of places. I volunteer at Moore Free Clinic one day a week. Moore Free Clinic is a free clinic that deals with people throughout Moore County who are uninsured or are working, but cannot afford insurance. We are their primary care facility. I work with diabetic and obese

patients. I have my own clientele and I work with them trying to help them navigate their diet, exercise, and to have a healthier lifestyle, if you will. That is where the nursing and physiology comes into play. I do that for them. If they need an extra nurse to triage or whatever, I’ll help them out with that. Several years ago, my husband and I took the citizen police academy class at Pinehurst Police Department, so we do directing traffic for special events, that sort of thing. I usually spend my Wednesday afternoons doing fingerprinting for them, so that’s an interesting avenue. I help at Habitat [for Humanity] with painting whenever we do Habitat houses. I have been involved with the Red Cross for years and years, and I teach CPR to laypeople, to church people, to anyone throughout the community. My time is free — I only charge for what the cost of the card is. Why is this the right retirement for you? It’s fulfilling. It is something that I am excited about. I have a passion, especially a passion for parish nursing, and also for Moore Free Clinic.

I want to help people, and helping people, to me, is the most important thing. And trying to be a servant -- a good servant -- to the people around me. I just enjoy giving back.

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Pickin’ and Grinnin’ A visit to Maness Pottery and Music Barn by Spencer Griffith | Photography by Caitlin Penna

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If fiddler and country music star Roy Acuff were around today and passed through Moore County on a Tuesday night, he would likely tell Clyde Maness “I told you so!” Decades ago, Maness told Acuff—at the Grand Ole Opry, no less—of his plans to build a music barn to host his informal acoustic jams, and the country music legend responded, “You build it and they’ll come,” remembers Maness. For nearly 45 years, people have indeed flocked from far and wide to Maness Pottery and Music Barn—located about six miles west of Carthage’s Courthouse Square on an otherwise desolate segment of NC Highway 24/27—for music, food, and fellowship in an atmosphere that’s hard to find elsewhere. It’s easy to find Maness Pottery and Music Barn, however, which possesses the telltale indicator of arriving in the right place at the right time in rural North Carolina: The small parking area can be found overflowing with pickup trucks and aging sedans as early as 6 p.m. some weeks, meaning others will have to park in the three acres out back. By that time, covered dishes are being carefully arranged on vinyl tablecloths by which time the music is just starting up. In warmer weather, there might be musicians picking their instruments outside near the large wooden sign along the roadside; flanked by hand painted depictions of both a ceramic pitcher and a pair of beamed music notes, the sign’s faded image of a fiddle alludes to the frozen-in-time nature waiting inside. The name itself is somewhat of a misnomer; although there’s obvious evidence of the building’s previous lives. Rather than an actual barn, the exterior actually looks more like a huge garage, which it indeed was when Maness ran a lawnmower shop there before converting it when the weekly music gatherings he hosted outgrew his home. While Maness estimates he and his painter wife Edna made around 30,000 pieces over the years, they stopped selling pottery three years ago when she was diagnosed with cancer—“She’s still alive and fussing,” he jokingly confirms—but remnants of their work still decorate the facility. Adjacent to a window with sills packed with ceramics, the metal front door—adorned with both a Snapper Mowers sign and “I Love Bluegrass” sticker—leads visitors into Clyde’s Place, the less formal name favored by locals and regulars— which buzzes with so much activity on a Tuesday evening that it almost overwhelms the senses. The inviting aroma of a burning wood stove draws visitors past a couple rows of tables—covered by instrument cases and filled with the banter of listeners—to a loose circle of chairs where casual jamming and conversation nearly always takes place. Pickers of all ages share and soak up wisdom. With the exception of whoever is drafted to hold down the low end—steadily thumping away on


either a washtub bass or double bass—folks may sit for a spell, instrument in hand, interrupted by the greeting of a passing friend or the laughter elicited by a neighbor’s joke. “I learned a lot from those circles around that wood stove,” recalls Harold Pickett, who plays guitar in Deep River Bluegrass Band and has been coming to the music barn— usually at least twice per month—since 2005, when he began learning bluegrass. He initially found the timing and rhythm was tricky to pick up, despite his background in classic rock and church music. “It was quite humbling.

Y

ou’ve got to have a bit of a tough skin because the older folks will tell you where you’re messing up, but eventually you’ll get it right.”

“The younger folks want to watch what you do and see if you can help in any way,” agrees veteran mandolin player Buddy Buchanan, who has come to Maness from nearby Broadway nearly every week since the mid-90s. “I feel like some of the kids have picked up on some stuff from me.” On this late October evening, Buchanan is rehearsing with his group Salt Creek Bluegrass Band in a cozy, dirt-floor room off to the side of the front room, the most intimate space for both performing and observing. Random collections of books and CDs are scattered around the room’s assorted knick-knacks, supplies, equipment and even relics of Moore County’s past, like the original cash register from the Belk-Cline in Robbins, which props up a framed dollar bill, the first received on the department store’s opening day in 1948. It’s a design theme common throughout the building, even if unintentional— old glass bottles and clay pots ring the large entry room, interspersed with Americana artifacts and bits of local history. A triptych of paintings featuring country music icon Ernest Tubb and bluegrass pioneers Lester Flatt and Bill Monroe look down on the stage in the main music room, where the tunes they composed and made popular are staples to this day. With rows of metal and plastic chairs, the room—added in 1990 when the gatherings outgrew their existing space—can easily seat upwards of 100 spectators. There’s space to spare for dancing, too, and the sharp click-clack of cloggers often accompanies upbeat standards like The Dillards’ “The Old Home Place” and The Osborne Brothers’ “Big Spike Hammer.” In the back corner, Maness can often be found adjusting levels on the soundboard in a humble booth not far from a photo that proves that he once played with Monroe, the Father of Bluegrass himself. He considers himself largely self-taught on

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both the bass and guitar, which he began learning as a grade schooler after his fiddle-playing cousin piqued his interest. A lover of bluegrass, country, and gospel, Maness grew up listening to folks like Hank Williams on the Grand Ole Opry every Saturday night, then later became a local radio star himself, performing multiple times each Saturday for decades on Asheboro’s WGWR with Tommy Floyd and the Bluegrass Buddies. He still regularly performs with groups in the area and is often involved in the music here on Tuesday nights. Otherwise, Maness—a larger-than-life character who spent stretches growing tobacco, weaving in a textile mill, and making furniture between his forty-five years raising chickens—roams throughout the property and plays the role of jovial host, shaking hands of regulars and newcomers alike while always prepared to share a story (or 10). It’s no surprise he feels so at home here; after all, he was born and raised just a couple miles away and has lived in the area ever since. Each week, he cooks a dozen pounds of pintos and even more potato salad. Whether picked up at a store on the way or, more likely, home cooked, Clyde’s specialties are supplemented by barbecue sandwiches, fried chicken, several different batches of cornbread, a slew of veggies, and more pies and cakes than you can shake a stick at. A chummy game of rummy is located at a card table between the long buffet, the perpetually full coffee pot and the refrigerator stocked with soda and bottled water, the latter hinting at the family-friendly list of rules—which bans alcohol, smoking and drugs—posted

nearby. “It’s just a good clean place to go play,” says Buchanan. “There’s no drinking - he doesn’t put up with any bull mess like that.” While there’s a printed sheet of paper pinned to the wall announcing no talking in the music room, Maness— whose name is on the sign itself—doesn’t seem to mind breaking it when he’s got a tale to tell. Pointing at the flags of various US states that cover an entire wall of the newest room, he talks about the travels that have taken him all over the country. On the opposite side, oversized letters reading “Memory Lane” sit above large snapshot collages—featuring the likes of bluegrass star Mac Wiseman—that occupy the wood paneled walls next to a hodge-podge collection of framed portraits of friends and publicity photos of fiddler Charlie Daniels and singer Brenda Lee, images that help illustrate the stories Maness already paints with his words. Though Maness Pottery and Music Barn sees its share of celebrities pass through, it draws folks from all walks of life—from Nashville musicians to area accountants, lawyers and retail workers—serving as an entertainment venue, gathering space, and community hub. Though donations are gladly accepted, there’s no charge for the meal or the performances as Clyde opens the doors of his music barn every Tuesday for anyone who’s interested in attending. “When you walk through those doors, you’re the same,” says Pickett. “Everyone’s the same at Clyde’s.” Everyone, that is, except Clyde himself, the man who welcomes folks into this community while also helping bind it together.

“When you walk through those doors, you’re the same,” says Pickett. “Everyone’s the same at Clyde’s.” JANUARY 2019 | OutreachNC.com 47


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The Power of a Story: How Shaping and Sharing Our Stories Connects, Heals and Empowers Us All by Amy Phariss

On a Thursday morning, in a room painted sea-foam green and filled with folding chairs, I sit and listen in rapt attention as a woman describes the love between a disabled teenage girl and her athlete-turned-soldier husband. Her voice trembles slightly as she tilts her head toward the floor, the memory of that tender high-school love taking her back in time, decades into her past. Just before her story, another woman spoke of traveling across the desert plains of the U.S., following an Olympic torch, a dream and the sound of a call she’d not at first recognized whispering her name. I sit for an hour and listen as men and women recall, recount and remember distinct moments in their lives, from sweet notes of encouragement sent with Milky Way bars, to the sometimes hard truths of growing up the child of immigrants to a tale of time travel that began, “Some of you won’t believe this story. Sometimes, I don’t believe it myself.” As an ongoing program at the Moore County Senior Enrichment Center, Jonathan Scott, local writer and storyteller, leads groups of seniors in the art of story telling with his workshop: The Time of My Life: Personal Storytelling. From the glimmer of a memory to a fiveminute oral history, Scott works with seniors to shape, craft and finally present stories of their lives, bits of their own personal history that so often go unsaid and unheard. Working with experienced writers, novice writers and 50

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people who may hesitate to call themselves writers at all, Scott helps participants unearth their own tales, finding hidden treasures in the sometimes smallest details of lives lived over decades, across generations and full of love, loss, humor, wit, charm and grace. Above all, there is grace. There is the love of a grandmother rubbing her granddaughter’s hand to get her to sleep each night. There is the hot shame of hearing a mother’s accented English attempting to order apple pie. There is hope for a young girl named Pearl and the invisible hurdle she overcame with the help of a teacher who said, “Yes, I think we can do that.” There is the determination of a woman called Freedom following a man called Eagle and a handful of Apache men thrown into the mix. There is the curiosity of a window through which one woman slipped into another time, a time of Victorian houses, patches of cabbage and a winged heart. There is a thread between them all, the stories and the voices and the eyes darting from ceiling to floor. There is a thread between their hands, their heads and their hearts, the soul of a storyteller, no matter his age, no matter his skill, no matter his words. There is a thread of humanity,


a shared connection that transcends accents, places of birth, gender, race or any other line drawn in cultural sand. There is humanity in hearing each other’s stories instead of only each other’s opinions, in knowing the background, the history, the slow unfolding of a life in the way it felt to snuggle up to the grandmother, to speak up for the immigrant mother, to listen to Pearl’s words and transcribe them in pen and to run from a handful of Apache men wondering what you’re doing on their land. Scott guides participants through the conception of ideas to the final oral telling of the stories of people’s lives. Keeping the rules and regulations brief, Scott chooses instead to focus on the stories themselves rather than a list of parameters. Phyllis Olsen, who shared several stories from her teaching career, describes the process: “The stories had to be true and personal, with an emphasis on how we felt when the episodes occurred. The stories could be sad, happy, frightening, outrageous, life-changing, and more.” If participants get stuck finding an appropriate tale or wondering if a story is too personal, Scott reminds them the stories needn’t necessarily be dramatic in nature to be meaningful. Some participants wonder if they even have any story to tell at all, and Scott reminds them, “Everyone has a story.” There is poignancy in everyday moments, in humor and the inbetween moments we often take for granted. According to Scott, “It’s about sharing the small things in life, the things that have become important to the storyteller.” More than simply a writing class, The Time of My Life asks participants to use their writing skills and their speaking skills, which is no small feat. Scott notes that there is a difference in telling a story in front of strangers rather than to people we know, who know us and the context of our

lives. When we tell our history to a stranger, the details become sharper, clearer, more necessary to convey who we are, what we’ve been through and why it matters. Donna Bloom, who shared a story of a cross-country trip in support of an Olympic dream, describes this process in saying, “We were initially asked to identify three ideas that we would first write about and then present as a story to the class. Writing the story was easy, but the thought of sharing my story with a live audience was daunting!” Class members begin thinking of stories, then work to shape them into narratives through the use of emotion, sensory detail and a natural flow from beginning to end. Bloom describes the difference between writing and telling her story in saying, “A writer must resonate with his story. A storyteller must resonate with both his story and his audience. The class enabled me to experience both.” The art of storytelling doesn’t come naturally to every participant, and more than a few participants were nervous with thoughts of standing before a room of people, many of them strangers, and sharing their memories. Olson says, however, “We were truly excited at the success of each person. We became each other’s cheerleaders.” Several of the storytellers struggled with shyness or nerves, but Lori Fischler says, “As a usually very shy person, I found myself letting go of my inhibitions due to the encouraging and extremely warm response of both the other students and of Jonathan, the facilitator.” Several of the participants were surprised by their own transformations through the process of writing and telling their stories, both through the writing and at the actual event. As Fischler says, “I still cannot believe that I was able to do this in an intelligent and comfortable manner in front of a group of strangers.”

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For more oral storytelling in your daily life, several podcasts allow you to stream the voices and stories of people all over the world right onto your phone or through your computer. Some of Scott’s favorites include: The Moth The Monti Revisionist History Strangers The Dublin Story Slam Podcast Jonathan Scott will continue facilitating The Time of My Life workshops at the Moore County Senior Enrichment Center. The next workshop begins this month, January 10, 2019. To inquire about available space, call the Senior Enrichment Center directly at 910-215-0900. Scott will also facilitate a The Time of My Life workshop for the general public at The Rooster’s Wife, a non-profit organization devoted to the performing arts, in Aberdeen. The workshop will culminate in a public storytelling Main Stage Event on February 12, 2018. All are welcome to attend, and the event will help raise funds for the Moore County Literacy Council. Go to www.thetimeofmylife.us for more information about The Time of My Life workshops and events.

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In the room with the pale green walls, I listen to the group standing before me, using their own voices to share their experiences, turning everyday moments from mundane or ordinary to heartrending. There is vulnerability in a person’s voice conveyed when the room is quiet, the words sometimes tumbling from a quivering lip, which differs from reading words on a page. There is a shared sense of humanity when we sit in a room with others, sharing the space and the stories equally, and there is a connection born from having experienced someone else’s history in real time. As Scott says, “I’ve come to believe that there is therapeutic value when a person tells a true story in front of a supportive audience. I also think there is therapeutic value for those who listen to the story, so telling a personal story can be a gift to others.” The storytelling event itself bears witness to Scott’s theory. When I arrived at the event, there was an air of hospitality and friendliness. People greeted each other with waves and smiles. A low hum of conversation buzzed through the air. As the storytelling ended, the room was noticeably changed. The waves were replaced by hugs. People lingered, perhaps a moment longer, none of us ready to leave the room, or the stories, behind. Our voices were all just a tiny bit quieter, hushed almost, as we talked about our favorite stories, the details that stuck with us, the words still hanging in the air. I am reminded of Maya Angelou’s famous words, “There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside of you.” As I walk up the stairs and out of the Senior Enrichment Center, the brisk fall air whipping across my cheeks, I think of the shared beauty of the storytelling experience - one person no longer bears the story alone, and that the rest of us get to carry pieces of it with us as we go.


Self-Publishing’s New Horizon: The Nuts + Bolts of Publishing Your Own Story by Jonathan Scott

It used to be called Vanity Publishing. It was what writers might turn to when no reputable publishers wanted their manuscripts. These wannabe authors could pay thousands of dollars to a “vanity publisher” who would print up a few copies of their book, which they could boast about and give away to friends and relatives. Today self-publishing is different in fundamental ways, almost entirely due to technology. The development of digital printing led to equipment that can print and bind books one at a time. Instead of expensive set-up costs requiring printing in huge quantities to be profitable, printon-demand (POD) allows self-publishers to work with companies that will print copies after they’re sold and ship directly to the customer. The second technological advance has been the introduction and popularity of eBooks. Thanks largely to Amazon’s Kindle, as well as tablets like the iPad, publishing a book no longer requires paper, ink, binding or equipment other than a computer. Finally, the internet, as a medium to both market and sell books, gives self-published authors a cost-effective way to reach out to readers across the globe. If all this sounds a little too good to be true, it’s because it is. A little.

The ease and affordability to self-publish these days means almost everyone can do it—and they are. It’s difficult to know exactly, but Publishers Weekly estimates that over one million books were self-published in 2017. When you add that to the estimated traditionally published book, that number tops 2,300,000 worldwide. That’s lots of competition. But if you’ve been inspired by current stories of run-away best sellers by self-published authors, or heard that Mark Twain and Virginia Wolfe self-published, or are simply convinced the book you have inside you is too important not to be shared, here are some tips. Once you’ve finished the exhausting job of writing an entire book, it’s a good idea to think about investing in the cost of a reputable, talented editor. Finding one can be daunting, and it’s very easy to pay a great deal of money to someone who is, at best, lacking in the skills you need or, at worst, a crook. Unfortunately there are plenty of scammers who really, really want your money. If you don’t have a personal recommendation, check out Preditors and Editors (www.pred-ed.com) before you hire an editor. The site is currently revamping and should be back soon with up-todate information. JANUARY 2019 |

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Kindle Direct Publishing is one of the two websites you need to know about. Until recently, Amazon had separate platforms, one for self-published printed books and another for eBooks. Now they’re combined at www.kdp. amazon.com. If you’ve ever shopped at Amazon and have a shopper’s account, you can establish a free account with KDP by using your same password. Amazon has gone to great lengths to make KDP easy to use. To publish as an eBook, you can simply upload your Word file and KDP will process it into an eBook. Unfortunately, Kindle versions don’t always look like you expect. It’s a good idea to brush up on your Word manual and learn to apply “styles” to your manuscript before you send to KDP. That way you usually get better results. If you want to self-publish as a print book, you should first find KDP’s standard book sizes and re-format your manuscript to one of those page formats. KDP offers to convert your manuscript into a print version for you for free, and they also have a paid service to format your book and even create a custom cover. But, once you’ve already devoted time to writing a book, it might be worth learning how to use Word to format the book yourself in a standard page size. When you have it looking perfect, you simply save the manuscript in PDF format (there’s probably an option in your print dialogue), and upload the file to KDP. They have an online method of letting you proof your paperback, but it’s a good idea to order an actually printed copy to be mailed to you. Depending on the size of the book, the cost can be under $10. You can order as many copies from them as you like or need.

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If you have dreams of your book being stocked in brickand-mortar stores, you’ll want to go through a very similar process with Ingram Spark (www.ingramspartk.com). Ingram is the largest distributor to book stores in the U.S. If you publish through them, your title is available across the country. Spark does charge a small fee for set-up, about $35. Self-publishing can be enormously rewarding, but take caution: With a million books a year being self-published, a huge industry has risen to take advantage of novices. The internet is teeming with websites that offer help to self-publishers. The more extravagant the promises and the higher the fees, the more skeptical you should be. Your self-published book might just become a New York Times bestseller on its own, but a realistic author should be understand that most self-published books sell only about 200 copies or less. For many of us who love to write, though, success can be measured differently. There’s no comparable satisfaction to being able to tell the tale of that wise-acre detective who’s been loitering around in your head for years. Or maybe you’d love to record a lifetime of personal experiences, lovingly crafted into a memoir book—even if that book is only read by your family and those who follow. The technology of publishing your own work has changed. Self-publishing no longer has the stigma of “vanity publishing,” and anyway... creativity, self-expression and sharing are never in vain.


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GREENS Greens ... greenbacks ... moola? Makes sense. Leafy greens resemble folded paper money symbolizing wealth and prosperity. Pair them with black–eyed peas and ham for a truly Southern New Year’s tradition (both high on the luck spectrum) and triple your luck for the year. Everything from cabbage to kale to your Mesclun salad mix applies here. Who doesn’t want more money next year?!

BLACK-EYED PEAS The prevailing folklore dates back to the Civil War era. During the Siege of Vicksburg, Mississippi in the late spring of 1863, the town was cut off from all food supplies for nearly two months. The people were close to starvation and resorted to eating the crops previously reserved for feeding their livestock. Lucky or resourceful, those folks created one tasty tradition! Black-eyed peas are also considered auspicious based on their resemblance to coins. 56

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DINNER BELL

Pigs are rotund, which represents prosperity (not, as it turns out, weight gain). They also “root forward” which is supposed to symbolize progress. Naturally, pork, with its rich, delicious fattiness has come to symbolize wealth and prosperity. With options like, sausage, ribs, bacon, ham, suckling pig, etc., there’s no reason not to be in “hog heaven” for at least one day.

Ringing in the New Year...

PORK


POMEGRANATE

Most of us have heard or been a part of consuming so called “good luck foods” at New Year’s. However, many people are unfamiliar with what foods are considered lucky or WHY they’re considered lucky in the first place. Here are a few examples of lucky foods that you can add to your New Year’s dinner courses. And here’s hoping that the legends surrounding ring true for you!

Long associated with abundance and fertility, pomegranates are eaten in Turkey and other Mediterranean countries as a sign of good luck. Their red color, which represents the human heart, denotes life and fertility; their medicinal properties represent health; and their abundant, round seeds represent prosperity — all things everyone hopes for in any fresh start. It doesn’t hurt that this jewel-toned fruit is in its prime come January.

SOBA NOODLES Slurp soba noodles without breaking them. In Japan, long buckwheat noodles symbolize long life, and are therefore lucky—but only if you eat them without chewing or breaking them. So get your slurping technique down. This Asian tradition has been going on in countries like Japan for centuries. Prepare some ramen or soba noodles in an Asianinspired, veggie-filled soup or stir fry to make a gratifying, healthy meal out of it. Legend has it the longer the noodles you slurp up the longer you’ll live!

RING-SHAPED FOODS Seek out ring-shaped food for breakfast. Consider bagels or donuts for breakfast (don’t you always?), which represent not only carby deliciousness, but also the year coming full circle. Ring-shaped foods like bundt cakes or donuts represent the continuous year from beginning to end. Who really needs an excuse to eat donuts? If you need a recommendation on where to find some tasty donuts/good luck charms, turn the page! JANUARY 2019 |

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Photo Essay Featuring:

Sandra’s Bakery Photography by Diana Matthews

In the heart of Sanford is the kind of place you could easily miss – which would be a mistake. With a vintage pink-and-white awning and a sign glowing OPEN, Sandra’s Bakery is Sanford’s go-to hot spot for donuts. Nestled near the corner of Wicker and Horner, you’ll be greeted by the scent of made-from-scratch, freshly-baked donuts and other goodies and, if you’re lucky, a smile from Sandra herself. A school teacher, Sandra works at the bakery on her days off, making her role in the community all the sweeter. With lines often extending through the front door and down the street (the place was hopping at 2:00 on a Tuesday afternoon), Sandra’s knows how to deliver delicious donuts. Whether you’ve been shopping on Steele Street or you’re looking for a Saturday morning treat, Sandra’s Bakery is sure to have a fitting sugary delight. You can sink your teeth into donuts ranging from Dutch crumb, caramel, cream cheese, coconut, maple and more. Some of Sandra’s specialties include Elephant Ears, Long Johns and

Creme Brulee Bread Pudding.

If donuts aren’t on your to-eat list for the day, or if you’re swinging by for a secondround afternoon treat, Sandra has you covered with cupcakes, muffins, lemon bars, croissants and other pastries paired perfectly with a hot cappuccino or, for the purists, a basic black coffee. Sandra’s Bakery is open Tuesday – Saturday from 5:30 a.m. to 3:00 p.m., so you’re on your own Sunday and Monday, which means the donuts will taste that much sweeter come Tuesday morning.

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GREY MATTER See Grey Matter Puzzle Answers on Page 65

Puzzle 13 (Medium, difficulty rating 0.45)

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DOWN 1. Form a whole 2. Indicates position 20. Belonging to me way ACROSS 3. Moves in water 21. One thousandth of 31. Diego, Francisco, 1. Class 4. Diminutive an inch Anselmo 6. Husband or wife 5. Old English letter 22. Midway between 32. A baglike 12. All the same 6. “Save the Last south and east structure in a plant or Dance” actress 16. Exclamation of 23. Article animal surprise 7. Dab 24. Pitchers have 34. These three follow 8. Digits 17. Lived in them A 18. Hawaiian 9. Female cattle’s 26. Steps 35. Frail entertainer mammary gland 62 | JANUARY 2019 28. Mars crater 37. Platforms 19. OutreachNC.com Of I 10. Yes 30. __ route: on the

Helps Hired Intended Loses Mends Perch Pines Pronunciation Reach Rests Rooms Ruler Sails Scenes Silvery Skins Slide Spots Statues Steps Stern Trout T-shirt Unless Useful Walked Weird

11. Improves 12. We all have one 13. Book of Esther antagonist 14. Invests in little enterprises 15. Organs that produce gametes 25. Mediterranean city 26. Peter’s last name 27. Unhappy 29. Swollen area within tissue 31. “No __!” 33. Soap 36. Chop or cut 38. “Atonement” author McEwan 39. Bullfighter 41. Of the universe 42. Founder of Babism 43. Not good 46. Large, flightless bird 47. Punitive 49. Makes less messy 51. Belts out a tune 53. Aboriginal people of Japan 54. An eye protein 55. Broad sashes 58. Actress Spelling 60. Distribute 64. Unpleased 65. Body art 68. Midway between north and east 69. Overdose


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IN VERSE

“Sonnet to crows” By Barbara Stoughton Near the bubbly fountain I sit quietly contemplating When suddenly on wide-open wings Two crows in flight come down Too close to my head! The shadows of their spread wings Cause me to duck As they zoom into the low bush nearby. Their caw-caw-cawing to each other Trumpets across the patio Blowing me out of my complacency While the fountain gurgles on Alive in their own world Suddenly two crows had swirled.

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OVER MY SHOULDER

GREY MATTER ANSWERS

New Year, New Thoughts

SUDOKU

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by Ann Robson from a leprechaun.’ This is a perfect Here we go again. Another new year Puzzle us 14 and (Medium, difficulty ratingjust 0.49) Puzzle of 15 ‘random,’ (Medium, difficulty rating example as you are not0.59) is upon it seems we were seeking getting 1 used 8 2to the 3 old 6 one. 5 It’s 7 time 9 4to 8 5recognition 7 4 6and2the 9person 1 3 you’ve chosen is left to wonder who made make those resolutions which we don’t 9 3 5 8 7 4 2 6 1 9 1 6 3 8 5 2 4 7 often keep. Things like exercise more, eat her/his day. 7 and 6 improve 4 9 2your1 game 3 come 5 8 to 3 4 2 9 7 1 6 5 8 better, In April we can share the joy of spring mind. 4 1 9 2 5 7 8 3 6 7 9plant, 2 or3a happy 8 4 card, 6 or 1 an with5a small Why3 not5 try8something 6 1 different 9 4 2this 7year? Easter 4 egg. 6 3 1 5 9 8 7 2 Instead 2 7of resolving 6 4 8to do 3 something 5 1 9 for ourselves, let’s plan to do something 6 9 3 5 4 8 1 7 2 for someone else. It doesn’t have to be 5 great 4 plan 7 1to change 9 2 the 6 world, 8 3 but some perhaps 8 2do one 1 7thing 3 that 6 will 9 change 4 5 someone else’s world.

I suggest we do a random act of kindness 17 (Medium, difficulty at Puzzle least once a month or evenrating once0.49) a week. These ‘random acts’ are meant 5 4 1 6 9 8 7 2 3 to be that: random as in unplanned, spur of 7 8 2 4 5 3 9 1 6 the moment, unexpected acts that may 3 9or please 6 2 another. 1 7 They 5 4don’t 8 surprise have2 to be 3 major 7 8events 6 9but rather 1 5 small, 4 simple things. 6 5 4 1 3 2 8 9 7 In January when we are usually feeling 8 1 9 7 4 5 3 6 2 let down after the holidays and somewhat 1 6 3by winter 9 8 weather, 4 2 why 7 5 constricted not 4be a2bright 8 spot 5 7for a1friend 6 and 3 9 send a “Thinking of you” card with a 9 7 5 3 2 6 4 8 1 short handwritten note? In this age of electronics, getting real mail is a treat. February filled with Valentine’s Puzzle 20is(Medium, difficulty rating 0.50) thoughts and gifts. Each of us knows at 5 4 6 7 1 8 2 9 3 least one person who may be alone and 3 be2getting 9 6candy 4 or 5 flowers. 7 1 Let 8 won’t that7person 8 1know 3 they 2 are 9 not 6 forgotten 5 4 and make time to do something special 4 7 3 9 6 2 1 8 5 with them, like lunch out, or morning 2 and 9 a8sweet 1 treat, 5 7or afternoon 4 3 6 tea coffee and1cookies 6 5--- you 8 3get the 4 idea. 9 7 2 March 9 is1 the4 perfect 5 8month 6 3to drop 2 7off a small pot of shamrocks. Put them at 6 5 7 2 9 3 8 4 1 the front door and sign a card ‘with love 8 3 2 4 7 1 5 6 9 Puzzle 23 (Medium, difficulty rating 0.49)

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May 1offers 2 the 8 special 7 4 day6 for5mothers. 3 9 The commercialization of such a 7 8 4 5 2 3 1 9 6 beautiful day is not what its founder 6 9 For5 those 8 who 1 7are mothers 3 2 4 intended. but their 2 3families 1 6are9scattered 4 7 across 8 5 the country, include them in something special you may be doing. Just try to do anything to(Medium, make them feel special. For Puzzle 18 difficulty rating 0.49) mothers who have lost children, please 1 2 7 6 9 4 3 8 5 offer them some comfort that day. 5 3 6 2 8 7 1 9 4 June is for ‘dads and grads’. The grads 4 fine. 8 We 9 sometimes 5 1 3 overlook 2 7 6the will be importance 2 9 of 8 dads, 4 7so find 5 something 6 1 3 to do or say to your own dad or someone 6 7 4 3 2 1 9 5 8 else’s dad, or a single dad. We tend to 3 men 5 when 1 9we’re 6 doing 8 7kind 4 things, 2 forget and there 7 6 are2many 8 of 4 them 9 who 5 3need 1 an extra kindness now and then. 8 1 5 7 3 6 4 2 9 This brings us to the halfway point in the 9 4 3 1 5 2 8 6 7 year. You get the idea --- this year try to make someone else happy for even a few minutes, and you will have succeeded. Puzzle 21 (Medium, difficulty rating 0.53) Once you get used to random acts, 9 yourself 5 7 doing 8 6them 4 more 3 1 you’ll2 find frequently. 1 7 3 2 5 4 8 9 6 Try it; 6 you’ll 8 4like3it. 1

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Ann Robson is the 9 7 2 6 8 4 author of “Over My Shoulder: 4 6 5Tales 9 of1 3 Life and Death and 8 4 1 In2Between.” 6 7 Everything She may be reached 5 overmyshoulder@ 2 3 1 4 9 at charter.net 6 9 7. 3 5 8

JANUARY 2019 | OutreachNC.com 65 Puzzle 24 (Medium, difficulty rating 0.47)

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Generations

by Barbara Hengstenberg & AOS Staff

OutreachNC asked adults and children our January question. Share your answer on our Facebook page.

What is one goal you hope to accomplish this year?

Working on my Girl Scouts Bronze Award. – Kathryn, 10 Happiness and fulfillment in a new job. – Ellen, 57

To settle back into a more authentic lifestyle after a chaotic move. – Amy, 50

To learn how to not spill anything. – Louisa, 3

To keep up my grades all year. – Lily, 12

I am 71 years old, and I hope to make it to 72! – Jim, 71

To become more involved in my new community and connect with my new land. – Laura, 57

To reach Tier 81 in the Battle Pass in Fortnite. – Bobby, 11 To be known as someone who listens, works hard and cares as a year-one assistant principal. – Leanne, 37 To improve at piano and do well on the next exam. – Julien, 10 To find balance. – Barbara, 57

To get better at spelling. – Madison, 6 I hope to accomplish the completion of transitioning my kids’ old bedrooms into useable office and creative spaces now that we are a few years into being “empty nesters.” – Michelle, 46 I want to beat Mario and do good in school. – Chase, 3

To score a point in a basketball game this year. – Timmy, 9

Run another 4-6 half marathons so I’ll be in shape to run another full marathon after I turn 80 in four years. – Rod, 76

To have my first public sculpture installation. – Mara, 51

My goal is to get 100 percent on math facts: multiplication and division. – Violet, 9

To be able to do a flip on the trampoline. – Kate, 7 I hope to stay healthy and active, spend time with family and friends, and enjoy every minute I spend with my two-year-old grandson. – Cindy, 70

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I want to get my middle splits in ballet. – Maggie, 13

OutreachNC.com | JANUARY 2019


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www.LorenzCreedLaw.com 230 N. Bennett Street, Suite 2, Southern Pines, NC 28387 OutreachNC.com 67 JANUARY 2019 |


extraordinary people extraordinary care The board-certified ophthalmologists at Carolina Eye Associates are some of the most respected eye surgeons in the United States. But beyond their board certification, skills, medical school training and years of surgical experience, they are known for their compassion and dedication to each of their patients. From consultation and diagnosis to treatment and follow-up care, it’s our mission to deliver the highest quality eye care resulting in the best quality outcomes. It’s not just our goal, it’s our passion. We offer the latest in breakthrough surgeries that can provide life-changing improvements to the way you see the world. Extraordinary people. Extraordinary care.

Providing exceptional medicine for more than 40 years. Cataracts

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Glaucoma l Diabetic Eye Disease l Retina & Vitreous l Macular Degeneration LASIK l Eyelid & Brow Lifts l Cosmetic Botox® (910) 295-2100 ◼ (800) 733-5357 ◼ www.carolinaeye.com

Albemarle ◼ Asheboro ◼ Cheraw ◼ Dunn ◼ Fayetteville ◼ Greensboro ◼ Laurinburg ◼ Rockingham ◼ Sanford ◼ Pinehurst/Southern Pines ◼ Wadesboro 68 OutreachNC.comLumberton | JANUARY 2019


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