SENIORS, BEWARE!: IDENTIFYING AND AVOIDING COMMON TRAVEL SCAMS
It’s that time of year for many of us: travel time. As summer chugs along, we will board planes, trains and automobiles (plus ships) and head out on various adventures. Travel is one of the perks of retirement, with more free time and discounts and senior-focused tours. But travel can also come with downsides, and travel scams geared towards seniors can be especially deceptive. Scammers take advantage of trust and exploit technology to scam seniors out of thousands of dollars every year.
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July has arrived with a boom – celebrating American independence with fireworks, parades and flag cakes (if you’re lucky). At OutreachNC, we’re always up for cake and celebration, so count us in as we crank up the air conditioning and honor our country’s strength and tenacity through these hundreds of years.
This month’s feature explores travel scams targeting seniors. Every year, seniors lose thousands of dollars from fraudulent travel transactions and cons. Phariss digs into common travel scams as well as tips for keeping yourself (and your wallets) safe.
In Ask the Expert, AOS Care Management Lead Care Manager Jennifer Tyner answers a reader’s question about travel when you’re also caring for a parent with health issues. Tyner offers expert advice and suggestions for helping Mom while getting some rest and relaxation yourself.
In Mental Health Matters, Amy Phariss, LCMHCA writes about coping skills. We all use coping skills, but
Well,
Don’t worry. It was decaf.
October is a gentle month. There are constant reminders of change. we are lucky, toward each other. We have lingering conversations over the flames flicker. Smoke dances around us in a circle. We zip our jackets
sometimes the ways we cope are unhelpful. Phariss looks at the most common unhealthy coping skills and offers insight into the line between what is helpful and what keeps us distracted and avoidant.
In this month’s feature, we’re starting an important conversation: care community for ourselves or a loved one? Fox Hollow Senior Robin Hutchings offers inside perspective for making this decision.
In Ask the Expert, Amy Natt answers a reader’s question regarding away without any estate planning. Without a will or access to important
Physical therapist Dr. Sara Morrison of Total Body Therapy and Wellness potential diagnostic tools used in physical therapy to help diagnose these tools differ from what other doctor’s offices may offer.
Finally, after many reader and caregiver requests, we’re offering caregiver tips for self-care, an aspect of caregiving often missed and sorely needed. July 24 is International Self-Care Day, and we thought caregivers could use some tips on taking care of themselves while they care for everyone else!
We’ll end this month with the words of writer Amy Tan, who explains the essence of American freedom:
I’m going to agree with Nathaniel Hawthorne this month, who wrote: I cannot endure to waste anything so precious as autumnal sunshine spent almost all the daylight hours in the open air.
In America, nobody says you have to keep the circumstances somebody else gives you.
Here’s to enjoying the October sunshine, falling leaves and daylight
Upward and onward,
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ASK THE EXPERT: R&R MEETS PEACE OF MIND
Jennifer Tyner, AOS Care Management, Lead Care Manager | jennifert@aoscaremanagement.com
Question: I am planning a trip with my wife for the fall. We are going to Maine for a little rest and relaxation and to see the fall colors. My mom, however, just broke her ankle and is in the process of rehabilitation. This is her second fall this year, and we’re worried about her. What can we do while we travel so she has the support she needs, and we can relax and rest without worrying?
Answer: This is a common and great question, and I appreciate that you’re thinking ahead and planning for your vacation and your mom’s care. This is a good situation for having your mom on an emergency oncall program, which often offers 24/7 access to care management. These programs mean that someone is available all day, every day, to answer calls and take action if your mom needs help while you’re out of town, in the middle of the night, etc.
Above all, it’s important to have a plan in place. The plan might include a list of people she can call if there is an emergency such as another sibling, a neighbor, a church friend or a professional care manager. Having someone who can give you some peace of mind while you’re gone is important. This person (or people) can check in on her and see that she’s eating, taking medications, or hasn’t fallen again.
You can hire a caregiver to do daily check-ins while you’re away. If you’re on our emergency program (AOS Cares), you can call us any time of the day. If something happens, your care manager can help decide what care your mom needs and can be a liaison if something happens while you’re gone.
Technology can also be helpful. Having cameras in place is a good option, so you can see your mom even if you’re not right there with her. Security systems now have fall detection. You can put a GPS threshold on your mom’s watch to monitor how far away from home she goes and where she goes, so if she goes out and can’t get home, you know where she’s at.
Finally, if your mom has already had two falls, maybe there’s an underlying issue. Getting her a good work up with her doctor before you go can help. Try to get to the bottom of what’s causing the falls – is she not taking her medicine, is her blood pressure high? A check-up offers insight into the problem and provides both of you peace of mind. You will know what is wrong and how to help support your mom physically. You’ll enjoy your vacation knowing you’ve gotten her the best help possible both before your trip and while you’re away.
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Seniors, Beware!
IDENTIFYING AND AVOIDING COMMON TRAVEL SCAMS
According to data from the Federal Trade Commission (FTC), roughly $10 billion was lost to fraud in 2023 alone. The report notes that younger people reported losing money to fraud more often than seniors; however, when victims are 70+ years old, the amount lost is more than younger people. The average loss for victims aged 20-29 is about $400. That amount doubles for people 70-79 years old, and the amount more than triples for seniors 80+ years old, with an average loss of $1450. For total amount lost altogether, people ages 6069 rank the highest, with $980,000 lost in 2023.
Some people lose far more to scams, and travel scams are on the rise.
According to recent research by McAfee, roughly 25% of Americans are victims of travel scams, and many of them lose more than $1000 to fraud during the travel season. With increased travel after the COVID pandemic, experts expect to see a rise in the number of travel scams and victims.
Here are a few points to keep in mind to keep yourself, and your wallet, safe this summer:
1. Travel scams (including time share plans) make up about 1% of all scams. In 2023, there were more than 55,000 travel/vacation scams reported to the FTC.
2. Most scams come to victims via email with phone calls and texts following in second and third place. Social media scams are also on the rise and common.
3. Scams include hidden fees, not just fake vacations. Sometimes, fraudulent companies will deliver the service (a tour trip, a hotel room, a rental car), but there are hidden fees attached or the description of the room/tour doesn’t match the reality once you arrive.
5. Vacation home scams. Scammers will make up rentals that don’t exist, or some of them book multiple people for one vacation home. You show up for your rental, and there is another family staying there. You’re out of luck and on your own.
6. Charter flight scams. The U.S. Department of Transportation’s (DOT) Special Authorities Division maintains a list of approved public charter flights. If the charter filing is not approved by DOT before the package is sold, you’re probably dealing with a dishonest charter operator.
Common Travel Scams:
1. Free vacation offers. When you call to inquire, you find out you have to pay certain fees and taxes on these offers, making them anything but free. You can do better scheduling your own vacation, one you know is legitimate.
2. Discounts on travel services like airfare, hotels, rental cars. Often, these discounts also come with hidden fees or are fake offers entirely.
3. International travel document scams. These sites claim to be able to help expedite travel documents, but in reality, they charge you high fees for documents you can easily get yourself through the Department of State website.
4. International driving permit (IDP) scams. According to the FTC:
An international driving permit (IDP) translates your government-issued driver’s license into 10 languages. Scammers create websites to sell fake IDPs, or try to sell them to you in person or some other way. If you buy a fake IDP, you’ll be paying for a worthless document. But, even worse, you also could face legal problems or travel delays if you’re detained for using it to drive in a foreign country. Only the U.S. Department of State, the American Automobile Association (AAA), and the American Automobile Touring Alliance (AATA) are authorized to issue IDPs.
Tips to Protect Yourself:
1. Remember: if it seems too good to be true, it likely is. Most travel scams are promising amazing deals or free vacations, which seem compelling but turn out to be cons.
2. Be careful and avoid clicking through to offers via email or text. As noted above, most scams arrive through email. Scams using QR codes are also on the rise, so be careful of these as well. If you see an email from an unknown source, advertising a free vacation or amazing discount on airfare, think twice before clicking!
3. Look out for imposters posing as booking or travel agents. Some people get all the way to a destination before realizing a booking (hotel, tour group, etc.) is fake.
4. Be careful regarding payment. Someone asking for payment via wire transfer, cryptocurrency or gift cards is a red flag. Paying with a credit card can offer fraud security and protection.
5. Do your research. If you are working with a new organization or tour group, look them up online or call the Better Business Bureau for more information. Look up travel companies, hotels, rentals, and agents with the words “scam,” “review,” or “complaint.” Check that the address of the property really exists. If the property is located in a resort, call the front desk and confirm their location and other details on the contract.
6. Read the fine print. Before you sign anything or make a payment, read the cancellation policies and fine print. Make sure you know what you’re getting and what you’re paying for!
7. Make sure any travel insurance is provided through a reputable source. Find out whether an agency is licensed at the website of the US Travel Insurance Association.
8. Remain cautious and aware while traveling. Scams can happen while you’re away, so be careful to remain alert while you travel, to use secure Internet providers and to keep all valuables locked up and secure either at your hotel or on your person.
What To Do If You’ve Been Scammed or Suspect a Scam:
If you think you may have been targeted by a travel scam, you may want to do the following:
• Report it to: the FTC at ReportFraud.ftc.gov or your state attorney general.
• Also, report any fraud to the platform you booked through (such as Expedia, Air B&B, etc.). These companies often have fraud departments to help you out and prevent further fraud/charges.
• Report any charges to your bank or credit card company immediately.
• Change any passwords linked with your travel accounts.
• Monitor your accounts, even after changing passwords, for any further fraudulent activity.
• Document everything. If, for example, your rental property is the issue, have all of your emails, texts, receipts and advertisements printed out or accessible for authorities.
MENTAL HEALTH MATTERS: COPING SKILLS FOR ENHANCING WELLBEING
Amy Phariss, LCMHCA, Clarity Counseling NC
Life presents us with ongoing challenges. Just as we never stop learning, we never stop struggling or facing problems. How we face our problems matters just as much as what we’re dealing with. The coping skills we use can determine how we feel in the short term and the long run. Strong mental health includes our ability to navigate life’s issues in healthy, adaptive ways. The more we can do this, the less our struggles overwhelm us, and the easier we can solve our problems and move on to bigger and better things.
According to researchers, coping is defined as “volitional efforts to regulate emotions, thoughts, behaviors, physiology, and the environment in stressful events or circumstances” (Compass et. al. 2001). We cope with daily problems like traffic jams, broken air conditioning units and chronic pain. We cope with complex problems like unhappy marriages, addiction and chronic health issues.
These issues come with complicated, often painful feelings and emotions. Many people struggle with loneliness, boredom, chronic pain, panic, insomnia, sadness and grief.
When we can’t cope with these feelings, and when the issues go unresolved for long periods of time, we can become depressed and anxious.
Both our physical and mental health suffers. Our coping skills play a huge role adapting to our circumstances in healthy, beneficial ways.
With the right coping skills, used at the right times, we can experience growth and wisdom.
If our coping skills are unhealthy or maladaptive, our problems can worsen or go on for much longer, leading to more distress.
Let’s explore some of these unhealthy coping skills and how they show up when we’re facing a problem.
Unhealthy Coping Skills
The word “unhealthy” is broadly used here. Most coping skills can be healthy and unhealthy, depending on the situation and how they’re used. For example, it’s great to distract yourself from something painful or stressful if you need to get work done or if you need some time to process an event. Distraction is a great tool. However, if you continue to distract yourself and never process the event, distraction now becomes unhealthy or less adaptive.
The key question is: does this feel good right now but limit my ability to cope in the long run?
Here are some examples of coping skills that are (or can become) unhealthy. They fall into two basic categories: avoidance and distraction.
• Disengagement/Emotional Numbing – when we disengage or become numb, we avoid our feelings and emotions, which feels better and more manageable than letting those feelings run amuck. I work with many clients who fear that feeling one emotion will set off a cascade of never-ending pain. They fear they will become overwhelmed, so they cut themselves off from even starting down the emotional road. Like procrastinating with external things (work, exercise, moving), emotional numbing is procrastinating with the internal things (feelings, emotions, memories).
Avoidance:
• Isolation – if you find yourself turning down social offers or spending more time in your room and less time with family or your partner, you may be isolating yourself.
Dealing with other people when you’re stressed or depressed can be challenging, but isolation is a short-term solution that creates long-term problems.
Avoiding others can be a way of avoiding ourselves and our feelings.
• Substance Use – alcohol, drugs and even food can make us feel good when we’re upset. These substances help us avoid painful events or memories, and we feel a little jolt of happiness when we engage with them. However, the longterm effects (and even the short-term effects) are often negative. Be aware if you’re substance use has increased recently. You may be using substances as a coping mechanism.
• Procrastination – procrastinating is the act of delaying or postponing tasks. Some of these tasks may be related to an area of life you’re feeling uncomfortable with – diet/exercise, work, relationships, selling a home, retirement. When we procrastinate, we essentially kick the can down the road. Again, this can be helpful at times and feel like a relief, but the problem is, obviously, down the road, waiting for us to deal with it.
• Rumination – rumination is defined as “a deep or considered thought about something.” In many ways, rumination is the opposite of procrastination and emotional numbing, but it can be just as unhealthy. When we ruminate, we can overfocus on an issue or problem. We worry. We go over it again and again in our minds. It feels like we’re taking action or doing something about the problem, but we’re actually avoiding clear, specific action to solve the problem. We do this if we don’t know how to solve it; if we don’t want to solve it or if we’re afraid to solve the problem. Rumination is often a distraction from action.
• Sleep – dealing with life’s challenges can be exhausting. Most of us want to rest and recover before tackling a problem or even feeling an emotion. Sleeping is avoidant, however, when we oversleep or sleep instead of taking action. The more we sleep, the more of a habit it becomes. Over time, we find ourselves actually more tired and lethargic than rested.
• Work – work can be a great relief for stress; it can also become a way to avoid problems, people, situations and emotions.
Overwork can include over committing to any activity – volunteering, sports, church, etc. Overwork makes us tired, which leaves us vulnerable to overwhelm and less capacity to address painful issues.
The problem with work is that it often feels useful and adaptive, so we miss when it becomes an avoidance tactic.
Distraction:
• Substance Use – substances are often both a distraction and an avoidance technique. We avoid the feelings or memories or action, and we distract
ourselves with the feelings of euphoria or peace we often find with substances. It feels good not only to avoid the issue but also to become enveloped in the safety and security we feel when we’re not feeling bad but good (however that feels).
• Shopping – much like substance use, other behaviors are used to distract from life’s issues. We shop, which feels productive and exciting. We shop for our homes, our wardrobes, for cars or even for vacations. It’s mentally engaging and stimulating, but after the purchases are made and the boxes unpacked, the feelings we’re distracting ourselves from rise again to the surface. Other distracting behaviors include eating, gambling, watching TV (often “binge watching”) and using social media. How many of us have scrolled through Instagram or Facebook rather than making a dreaded phone call or paying a bill?
•
Socializing – socializing has huge emotional and physical benefits. We are healthier when our relationships are stronger and more connected, and socializing is part of this connection. However, like eating or any other distracting behavior, socializing can sidetrack us. We get distracted with the lives of our friends or social commitments, which can be engrossing and divert precious attention and time. Without this time and attention, it’s hard to solve problems, identify issues and process emotions.
• Sports – another healthy, adaptive coping skill that sometimes becomes unhealthy is playing sports. Sports are great. We engage with others, move our bodies, often get outside and generally feel more energetic when we play sports. However, sports can be just as distracting as any other behavior. What makes sports difficult to identify as unhealthy is that they’re so often considered beneficial. We
prescribe engaging in sports to cope with life’s stressors. Exercise is a go-to suggestion for feeling better but notice how often you’re playing and how engrossed you become. Ask yourself: am I using sports to avoid other areas of my life? Is my partner noticing I’m on the golf course more often, at the expense of other parts of life?
Many of these coping skills fall into both camps: avoidant and distracting. The line between healthy and unhealthy is also sometimes razor thin. What is adaptive one week can become avoidant the next week.
Ask yourself the following questions when you think of how you’re coping:
1. What am I trying to cope with?
2. What feelings or emotions come along with this issue?
3. Is my behavior (substance use, work, sports, etc.) helping me solve the problem or address the issue? Or is it helping me avoid the issue or distract from uncomfortable decision or feelings?
4. Is my avoidance healthy or unhealthy? If it’s healthy, when will it become unhealthy? What signs should I look for to indicate I’ve headed into unhealthy territory?
5. What do I need to cope better? Do I need to build my skills? Do I need support? Do I need resources I don’t currently have, such as time, money, etc.?
With some thought and insight, you can identify which of your coping skills are unhealthy or problematic and begin to change habits and patterns for a better outcome. Next month, we’ll explore healthier coping skills and look at how you can engage in more adaptive behavior for long-term success!
References: Kozusznik MW, Puig-Perez S, Kożusznik B, Pulopulos MM. The Relationship Between Coping Strategies and Sleep Problems: The Role of Depressive Symptoms. Ann Behav Med. 2021 Mar 20;55(3):253-265. doi: 10.1093/abm/ kaaa048. PMID: 32706860; PMCID: PMC7980764.
Self Care for Caregivers
Many of ONC’s readers are caregivers. We are always exploring ways to support the caregivers in our lives, whether we’re receiving care or providing it. Each month we provide a few easy, sustainable tips for caregivers, to help and support the people who care for us all!
This month, AOS Care Management Care Manager Kate Pomplun offers three important steps for self-care:
1. Make sleep a priority: Yes, easier said than done, but still quite important. This may mean less free time, but your body and stress level will thank you. It can be so hard when your time is not your own b/c of the demands of caregiving - especially with someone who has dementia and doesn’t sleep through the night...
2. Delegate tasks you can let go of: Are there others who are willing to help but don’t live nearby or work during daytime hours? Would they contribute to paying for occasional respite care? Or a grocery/meal delivery? Can another person handle financial tasks remotely/ online? Could they do other things around the house allowing you a break/some free time?
3. Have an outlet - whether spiritual, physical, social, something that helps you focus on something positive you can do/enjoy in your life. A content soul and overall perspective can be refreshing, especially if you find methods for mindfulness in these outlets.
ACROSS
1) Quint in "Jaws"
5) Defender of CastleGrayskull
I0) Drunkards
14) Caesar's garb
15) Deposed leader, perhaps
16) Exclude
17) Poetic collection
18) Extend, in a way
19) Old Chevy
20) Bully's credo
23) Can of worms?
24) Warms up, as leftovers
25) Arrangement
28) Move, as a plant
31) Acknowledge
32) Like granola
33) Drink from a dish
36) Was completely indifferent
40) Pull the plug on
41) Singing duo Hall & _
42) Gadgeteers' concerns
43) Grapevine tidbit
44) Drum sounds
46) Remove a violin string
49) "That hurt!"
50) Middle of a certain month
57) Digestion aid
58) Pay a call on
59) Pink, as a steak
60) Young winged god of the Greeks
61) Slur over a syllable
62) Affirm
63) Blow a gasket
64) Bottle-_ dolphin
65) Requisite DOWN
1) Check
2) Arizona Native American
3) All excited
4) Basin
5) Type of crab
6) Permission to leave granted by a bishop
7) Stole type
8) Safe, on board
9) Kind of wire
10) Part of USSR
11) Alpha's opposite
12) A size too small
13) Sports figs.
21) St. Anthony's cross
22) Aries' river
25) Curtain material
26) Mary Kay competitor
27) "_ better watch out ... "
28) Indy entrant
29) Flight data, briefly
14) Caesar's garb
15) Deposed leader, perhaps
16) Exclude
17) Poetic collection
18) Extend, in a way
19) Old Chevy
20) Bully's credo
23) Can of worms?
24) Warms up, as leftovers
25) Arrangement
28) Move, as a plant
31) Acknowledge
32) Like granola
33) Drink from a dish
36) Was completely indifferent
"That hurt!"
50) Middle of a certain month
57) Digestion aid
58) Pay a call on
59) Pink, as a steak
60) Young winged god of the Greeks
61) Slur over a syllable
62) Affirm
63) Blow a gasket
64) Bottle-_ dolphin 65) Requisite
Gray Matter Games Solutions
Make Every Day
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