Overachiever Magazine: January 2021 Issue

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Anna Archibald / Divya Chhotani / Natalie Obedos / Shreya Rajappa / Charlotte Drummond / Kate Anderson-Song / Grace Liang / A. Mana Nava / Ruchi Acharya / Srilekha Cherukuvada / Aishah Khan / Maggie Tse / Jennie Vallangca / Divya Chhotani / Rialin Jose / Annika Cheng / Aphrodite Delaguiado / Reeti Roy / Angela Dong / Isabel Lee Roden / Ashritha Muppidi / Dr. Sara Chong / Elu Aiyana / Deena Umeda / Tanvi Nagar / Yuu Ikuda / Citra Benazir / Yiling Yi / Cynthia Putri Iskandar / Alexandra Durrschnabel /Patine Jewelty / Maggie Teng / Jessica Chen

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Contents Table of Contents Table of Contents Table of Contents Table of Contents Table of Contents

Interviews with the Co-Creators of LUNAR

47 Poetry Roundup

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57 Interview with Elizabeth Su

son

Interview with Jasmine Pec-

23 Winter Melon...and other po-

ems by Anna Archibald

27 Thoughts by a First-Gen on

Self-Care during Pandemonium

by Maggie Tse

31 Stuck In A Maze by Divya Chhotani

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61 Miss Demure by Natalie Obe-

dos

65 As Netflix Put It, “Representation Matters” by Shreya Rajappa

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A Playlist from Overachiev-

ers to Overachievers #1

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Virtual Revolution by Shreya

The Odd Man (or Person) Out by Jennie Vallangca

Rajappa

37 Interview with Devishi Jha

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41 Get Schooled: American vs. Asian Education Systems by Shreya Rajappa

The “Asian Experience”:

Complicity vs.

Relatability

by

Grace Liang

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Losing The Moral Compass

45 Identity by Aishah Khan

In Workplace by Ruchi Acharya

35 The Odd Man (or Person) Out by Jennie Vallangca

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Ulam: Main Dish Documentary by A. Mana Nava

Contents Table of Contents Table of Contents Table of Contents Table of

able of Contents Table of Contents Table of Contents Table of Contents

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Table of Contents Table of Contents Table of Contents Table of Contents Table of Contents Table of

Table of Contents Table of Contents Table of Contents Table of Contents

Table of Contents Table of Contents Table of Contents Table of Contents T

Table of Contents Table of Contents Table of Contents

able of Contents Table of Contents Table of Contents T

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Instagram/Facebook @asian.jews

Twitter @asian

Interviews with th

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n_jews

For more, visit https://linktr.ee/asianjews

he Co-Creators of

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GEN SLOSBERG

Written by Kate Anderson-Song

INTERVIEW WITH

Interview with Gen Slosberg, Co-Creator of LUNAR Written By Kate Anderson-Song

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Gen Slosberg is a non-profit professional working at Jewish Youth for Community Action (JYCA). Her professional work revolves around organizing and building power for Jewish Youth of Color. The Co-Creator of LUNAR: The Jewish-Asian Film Project, Gen is passionate about strengthening multicultural connections and affirming the messiness and fluidity of identity. She is a writer, advocate and amateur fusion food cook. A fun fact is she speaks three languages and can code in 2 more (lol)! Gen received her B.A. in Political Science from UC Berkeley in 2020.

Social profile: @gxslosberg on Instagram

Introduce yourself!

Hi! I’m Gen Slosberg, my Chinese name is 夏夜. It means summer night! I identify as mixed-race, Chinese, Asian American and Ashkenazi Jewish. I was born and raised in China, and I moved to Southern California in the US when I was 15 years old. I then went on to earn a Bachelor’s degree from UC Berkeley and I now work in the nonprofit field with a Jewish youth empowerment organization! I am really passionate about advancing equity and belonging for communities of color, and my vision for the world is a place where everyone feels safe and comfortable to express all their identities.

What does being Jewish mean to you?

I feel like I have a pretty atypical Jewish story. Being Jewish was all my choice! My dad, who is the Jewish one, didn’t raise me Jewish at all. We didn’t have temples, Hebrew schools, youth programs, camps, etc. where we lived in China. So I knew as much about Jews as my non-Jewish friends growing up. I had the following misconceptions: 1) you have to be religious to be Jewish. 2) Jews are all white.

In college, my friend from class invited me to an event at the campus Jewish center.

It was warm, and welcoming, and I met another Chinese Jewish person! So this began to open up the possibility for me to

see myself as Jewish. I got connected with a mentor who is Jewish and Mexican, and a few other Jewish peers of color. These friendships gave me insight into each of those folks’ experiences, and a surprising amount of them told me they had a complicated relationship to Judaism as a religion and didn’t regularly practice. They told me that Jewishness is more a value system and peoplehood to them. When they started listing some Jewish values of theirs, a lightbulb sort of went off in my head. My dad shared those things that made my friends feel Jewish - particularly humor and valuing education. So that made me think - I have always been Jewish, so I’m just exploring something that’s always been in me and will always belong to me.

All this helped me see myself as a Jew the fact that Jews of Color existed and Jews who weren’t sure of their relationship to religion existed. Being with other Jews of Color made me feel seen in a deep way, and when I was with them I never felt weird about not knowing stuff during ritual or not having deep knowledge of traditions.

They would teach me, without judgment - that’s what community is about. Other Jews of Color helped me find myself as a Jewish person and I am forever grateful!

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What is Lunar: The Jewish Asian Film Project?

There’s the official answer and my own spin on what LUNAR is.

Officially: LUNAR: The Jewish Asian Film Project showcases and celebrates the stories of Asian American Jews, through our upcoming video series, interviews, community events, and more!. We facilitate nuanced, honest conversations about identity, covering themes such as media representation, the model minority myth, racism, antisemitism, belonging and inclusion in Jewish spaces, family, culture, and fusion food. Stay tuned for our video series, debuting February 12, 2021!

What LUNAR means to me personally is a space where I can be myself without pretenses. As a mixed person, I find it really hard to find Jewish or Asian American spaces where I feel I can fully belong and be seen. I am proud to be Chinese and Jewish, and no one can take that away from me. But I still feel a lot of distress and anxiety when I enter spaces for Chinese or Jewish folks because I’m often the only person with a multicultural identity.

I’ve also had many people question me, so having to constantly explain how people like me exist is exhausting. I find that in those groups, I always have the fear of being told I’m not enough at the back of my mind. This makes me feel less comfortable making cultural references or trying to relate to others because what if I mess up? I feel like if I messed something up, then my Chinese or Jewish “credentials” will be taken away.

But in LUNAR, all that stress and need for explanation melts away! LUNAR is a space that normalizes and celebrates multiplicity. To us, having many identities that intersect is so awesome, and deserves to be highlighted. Being multicultural to us is not being less of everything we are, it’s

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embracing “more.” We want to explore all the messy and beautiful stuff that comes up with a multicultural background - and no one’s authenticity will be questioned.

What inspired the creation of Lunar?

What is its mission?

I think me and Jenni, LUNAR’s Co-Creator, have really different pathways of how we arrived at LUNAR. I come from an organizing and political action background - I spent two years organizing mixed-race students at UC Berkeley, and helping out with Jews of Color groups in the Bay Area.

Both the mixed-race and Jews of Color community encompass folks with so many different identity intersections. While there are a few things we have in common, we often aren’t able to get extremely specific and nuanced because the spectrum is so broad. At the same time, I knew a lot of Asian American Jews through my work in those communities. Many of them had expressed to me how amazing it is when they get to talk specifically about those two identities.

So I thought, why not create a space for that? While being in coalition with other folks of somewhat similar backgrounds is important, we Asian American Jews need space to work through our own stuff and feel celebrated too! So I got a group of Chinese and Jewish women together and recorded us talking about our identities on Zoom. The fact that we had this baseline similarity in identity helped us connect really well and dive deep. Hearing those unique stories cemented in my mind how much I really needed this and how much I wasn’t getting it from existing media.

After all, Asian Americans, and particularly Asian American Jews, are all but erased from the conversation. Other than a few articles in Jewish press here and there, our stories are largely not being told. My

“LUNAR is a space that normalizes and celebrates multiplicity. To us, having many identities that intersect is so awesome, and deserves to be highlighted. Being multicultural to us is not being less of everything we are, it’s embracing ‘more.’” hope is that through telling our stories in community, with one another, that we can all feel less alone, have space to process who we are, and find joy and pride in it!

There’s nothing quite like showing up to a room and everyone shares [many of] your identities.

Why the name: Lunar?

I came up with LUNAR randomly while sitting on a toilet at 2am, I think. Me and Jenni had been thinking of so many different names that just didn’t quite fit. But when I told Jenni about LUNAR, it just felt right.

“LUNAR” on a surface level represents the fact that both Jewish holidays and many Asian cultural celebrations run on the lunisolar calendar. Diving deeper than that, it’s also representative of how mixed and multicultural folks navigate our identities. Just as the moon has many faces, we show different sides of our multifaceted selves to different people. And the faces change, just like our identities are fluid and ever-evolving.

You’ve also written articles for the Daily Californian, worked for the non-profit, Jewish Youth for Community Action, and served as the Executive Director of Mixed@Berkeley - what led you to these groups and this work?

A lot of my work in college (Daily Cal & Mixed @ Berkeley) revolved around being mixed. Growing up in China as literally the only mixed person in my community, I felt so alone in navigating my identity. My mixedness was at the forefront of everything - other than a few family friends my mom and I knew very well, every single person made backhanded comments about my “distinct features.” It consumed who I was because people refused to see deeper than that - they were obsessed over my racial identity and physical appearance. So I came to resent being mixed and felt incredibly excluded for it. I just wanted to be a normal kid but everything I did was colored first and foremost by my identity.

When I moved to the US, I realized how normal being mixed was - I lived in SoCal so lots of mixed kids around. This was cemented in college when I joined a mixed organization (Mixed @ Berkeley). Being in that group helped me process a lot of identity trauma and having strong friendships with others who shared my experiences was really transformative.

I was then inspired to write a series of columns for the Daily Californian about my experience. This column taught me how to define mixedness on my own terms, to be proud of who I was without letting others’ judgments, doubts, fetishization, unfair treatment, etc. affect me. So I wanted to contribute to bringing this confidence I gained to other people.

What drew me to JYCA was the culture of the group. JYCA is a magical place! Youth get to be really vulnerable and authentic

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with each other outside of the pressures of high school, learn about social justice and take action. That’s so special to me because I was super politically active as a youth and didn’t have a supportive community like JYCA to organize with.

Additionally, JYCA is very inclusive to all kinds of Jews. They explain everything to you and don’t expect you to come in with a deep Jewish background. This is also important to me because I learned everything I know about Judaism as an adult, and had there not been inclusive places for me to learn I would not feel as connected to my Jewish identity.

During this time of COVID-19, occurrences of anti-Asian racism and antisemitism have been, unfortunately, very prevalent. How has this year affected you and this project? How have you been coping?

The upside of it is that COVID-19 meant we could film virtually, and people across the country could participate in LUNAR. Geographic diversity isn’t the first thing that comes to mind when you say “diversity,” but it does make for interesting stories. Where you are shapes so much of who you are, including access to cultural foods and communities, diversity of your environment, etc.

It has been really difficult and disheartening to watch so many instances of anti-Asian racism and antisemitism. Every time a video of an incident pops up I am reminded that people like me are not safe, and the belonging of ‘model minorities’ is conditional. Though I have to acknowledge my own privilege as a light-skinned, racially ambiguous person. I very rarely get read as Asian, which shields me from many instances of explicit anti-Asian racism. I have experienced it when people know I’m Asian - but I get to choose when to express my Asian-ness which is a privilege.

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In terms of antisemitism, I am becoming more and more frustrated with the fact that people aren’t including Jews in their activism. I think this stems from misperceptions about Jewish folks including that we’re all white, so we can’t possibly experience being marginalized. Despite the fact that white supremacists wore shirts that alluded to the Holocaust, I don’t see a lot of non-Jewish activists talking about antisemitism as a pillar of white supremacy. So hopefully, LUNAR can contribute to a more accurate, authentic understanding of who Jewish people are, and help enlighten everybody about our experiences.

That being said, I will let you all see for yourselves how anti-Asian racism and antisemitism affect our community of Asian American Jews by watching our upcoming videos!

What does self care mean to you? How do you take care of yourself?

I will be honest and say I am very terrible at self care. COVID has made it so that there are so little boundaries between home and work. Due to a combination of internalized model minority and cultural values, I am almost compulsively perfectionist. I push myself too hard sometimes, and I then feel burnt out or stressed and it actually derails my work. So I’m working on setting clearer boundaries between work and life, getting more into yoga and spending more time away from the screen.

I need to feel like a full person outside of work - so that’s the self care I’m working towards.

Here are some rapid-fire questions: Your go-to coffee shop order?

Chai or matcha latte.

Favorite time of day?

At night, I get a lot of random ideas in the bathroom at 2am. Including the LUNAR project name!

Any good films/tv shows you’re watching right now?

I recently watched Capital in the 21st century on Netflix. Interesting for those who are into Political Economy.

Ultimate comfort food?

Tomato egg noodle soup! My mom always made me this when I got sick as a kid.

What has been the highlight of your day today?

The youth program I run at my work started!

What is next for Lunar and for you?

LUNAR’s videos will be published weekly from February 12th to March 26th. Each video has a specific theme, like food, cultural values, relationship to language, model minority, etc. So check those out for some insightful thoughts on identity :) We are aiming to host at least one hangout for our Asian American Jewish community by mid-2021. For now, we want to focus on building a social media audience and brand, and making our community feel welcome.

For me, it’s hard to say! I have a lot of different passions - equity and belonging for multicultural folks being a big one. But I’m also a huge quantitative social science nerd and used to research Chinese foreign economic policy in Latin America. I love playing with numbers! In the long run I want to go to grad school and pursue a career where I can use my analytical skills and data tools to help social impact organizations achieve their goals.

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Jenni Rudolph is an Los Angeles-based songwriter and musician specializing in pop, R&B, and funk music. A 2020 graduate of Berklee College of Music with a B.M. in Songwriting, Jenni has written music for Silk Music, Revelation Records, non-profit The Canales Project, television series The Young & the Restless, and virtual reality video game Audica. Beyond music, Jenni is also the Creative Director of LUNAR: The Jewish-Asian Film Project. Jenni approaches all of her creative endeavors with a passion for diversifying representation and a hunger for impactful, authentically human experiences.

Social profiles: Instagram @jenni.rudolph YouTube.com/JenniRudolph www.jennirudolph.com Introduce yourself!

Hi, I’m Jenni! I’m a songwriter, musician, and the Creative Director of LUNAR: The Jewish Asian Film Project. I identify as a mixed Chinese and (secular) Ashkenazi Jewish woman, and I’m from Southern California. When I’m not working on music or film projects, I’m solving or designing puzzles, eating pasta, or sleeping at weird hours.

As Creative Director of Lunar: The Jewish Asian Film Project, what are your responsibilities - and what is your vision for Lunar?

My role is super collaborative, but mainly involves designing and editing our video series and social media content, and managing our Instagram. Through all of LUNAR’s endeavors - video content, interviews, community events, and beyond - my vision is 1) to connect with and provide a space for Asian American Jews, 2) to positively, authentically and diversely represent this intersection, and 3) to inspire our broader communities to think deeply and have nuanced dialogues about identity, inclusion, racism, antisemitism, and all of the interconnections between.

Lunar’s video series will be launching in February 2021! What will these videos feature?

Our series features 23 Asian American

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Jews from a range of backgrounds, discussing the nuances of having a multicultural identity. Themes include food, community and belonging, cultural values, the model minority myth, racism, antisemitism, and media representation!

Outside of Lunar, you are also a songwriter and musician - how did you begin pursuing music? What inspires your music and creative pursuits?

It’s a cliché musician origin story, but I was singing before I could talk. I first learned about the musical scale at my Jewish preschool, made up songs wherever I went as many toddlers do, and then never grew out of it. In first grade I started documenting my song lyrics in MS Word on my parent’s chunky computer and plunking out chords on a toy keyboard that played up to 4 notes at a time. I entered middle school with a catalogue of a couple hundred songs, many of them demoed with a tiny USB microphone, and my heart set on becoming a professional songwriter. So I was definitely precocious and driven, and that’s how I convinced my mom (who, in typical Asian parent fashion, wanted me in STEM) to send me to Berklee College of Music. I graduated in 2020 with a degree in Songwriting and a minor in Recording & Production, and now I’m a freelance songwriter writing

INTERVIEW WITH

JENNI RUDOLPH Written by Kate Anderson-Song

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“I’m inspired by duality, nuance, and authenticity. As a songwriter, I aim to write songs that feel distinctly human - songs that listeners relate to and feel seen and understood, not just music that fits a vibe or a brand.”

violence or overt racism. But if I’m honest, there is absolutely a lingering, back-ofmy-mind anxiety that comes with both being Jewish and being Asian in America, that escalated this year. My hometown is a white supremacy hotspot, and whenever my sister and I go on walks around the neighborhood, we pass by Trump flags and white neighbors staring at us. It’s so uncomfortable to feel unwelcome in a place I’ve lived since I was an infant. Staying at home for most of 2020 certainly helped me to feel physically safer, but racism and antisemitism is still so rampant online, and the pandemic and election added to the tension.

primarily for pop, R&B, and electronic artists, as well as film/TV placements. I also occasionally release my own funk music, including a song I’m working on this year, “Water & Oil”, which is all about learning to embrace my mixed Asian identity in a world that constantly otherizes me.

Fortunately, LUNAR was conceptualized in spring 2020, and the timing couldn’t have been more perfect. Being able to connect with and process these anxieties with a community of Asian American Jews has been insanely healing. Aside from LUNAR, I’ve also been coping by setting personal boundaries for myself - giving myself permission to turn off the news and distract myself with things that bring me joy.

I’m inspired by duality, nuance, and authenticity. As a songwriter, I aim to write songs that feel distinctly human - songs that listeners relate to and feel seen and understood, not just music that fits a vibe or a brand (although that certainly is a part of it). Same goes with creative projects of other mediums. Specifically, I’m inspired by dreams, psychology, logic puzzles, science phenomena, humor, conflicting emotions, and the indescribable. Whenever I experience emotions so complex that I can’t put my thoughts into words, that’s a songwriting challenge.

During this time of COVID-19, occurrences of anti-Asian racism and antisemitism have been, unfortunately, very prevalent. How has this year affected you and this project? How have you been coping?

Whenever I’m asked this question, my first impulse is to preface that I’m relatively fortunate, that I haven’t experienced any

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What does self care mean to you? How do you take care of yourself?

Self care is a necessary layer to the creative process. As a songwriter, every day I dig into my full range of emotions and commodify them into song. My work makes me laugh, cry, ponder, scream… I’ll write a pensive break-up song one afternoon and a raging social change anthem that evening. Whichever natural human emotions I experience in, say, a month, I then relive condensed within a couple days. I have to keep the memories raw and honest, yet separate myself from it enough to do the logical work of piecing together rhymes and syllables. Many artists describe this as “cathartic”, which it is… but it can also be incredibly mentally taxing, particularly when creating is your source of income and directly correlated to your own self-worth.

Hypocritically, I preach self care to my friends but still very much struggle to prioritize it in my own life, even knowing how imperative it is. The first step for me has been learning to truly trust myself.

Trusting my instincts and respecting my limits, both physical and mental. Self care is knowing when to say “no” - declining opportunities if I get a bad vibe, self-accountability when I’m tempted to fall into my bad habits. And even the basics - listening to my body’s signals to eat or sleep, lol. I try to check in with myself regularly - how am I feeling? What has made me genuinely happy recently? What do I need to cut back on? It helps to reassure myself that cutting myself slack on my anxious days will ultimately make me happier, healthier, and more productive on my better days.

Productivity probably shouldn’t be what motivates my self-care, but our “hustle culture” society makes that super difficult to re-frame.

Here are some rapid-fire questions!

Your go-to coffee shop order?

White hot chocolate! I try to avoid coffee because the inevitable caffeine crash hits me hard, but I’m perpetually cold with a sweet tooth, so at any given moment I’m probably craving white hot chocolate.

Favorite color?

Periwinkle! It’s sorta blue, sorta purple relatably “in-between”, for me as a mixed person. I’m also a fan of blues, rose pink, gold/metallic shades, and pastels. I have three kinds of synesthesia, so colors are very important to me!

Any good films/tv shows you’re watching right now?

I definitely prefer shows over films because I connect more to long-term character development.

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My all-time favorite show is Bojack Horseman. My favorite from 2020 was Netflix’s Baby-sitters Club reboot, which injected me with just enough nostalgia and joy to keep me going to 2021.

Fall, Winter, Spring, or Summer?

Summer, by a landslide. Summer’s generous daylight hours are most compatible with my horrifically nocturnal sleep schedule (I’m often up past 6am writing), plus all my favorite snacks are in season during summer (nectarines, apricots, corn on the cob, watermelon). I feel most myself in the summer.

Spring wins in the color palette department (pastels everywhere!) but destroys me in the seasonal allergies department.

Fall wins points for scents and flavors (pumpkin! cinnamon!) and for being easy to rhyme in a song… but underneath that cozy facade, fall is just a tiresome commute to the impending winter. Winter honestly loses all around. I used to be a winter gal, growing up in southern California and resenting the spray tanned, mindless rich surfer kid culture that I associated with summer. UNTIL I moved to Boston for college, experienced snow for the first time, and realized that never waking up before sunset makes me feel empty and hopeless. I guess I really am a California girl at heart!

What has been the highlight of your day today?

I finished writing a particularly challenging song! Always a great feeling.

What is next for Lunar and for you?

Our series premieres February 12, and we’ll be releasing weekly episodes through the spring, hosting community events, and creating more short-form social media content!

Aside from LUNAR, this year I’ll be re-

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leasing new music - some under my own name, some written with/for other artists.

I’m also working on writing and designing a murder mystery online game in collaboration with several fellow creatives. So many creative projects to look forward to!

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“美国旗袍 Beautiful [American] Cheong Sam” by Annika Cheng Find her at: https://www.annikacheng.com & IG: @meijia_design Medium: Found Fabrics “Beautiful [American] Cheong Sam examines the way I see the world as a Cantonese American living between two cultures. The Cheong Sam is a traditional dress worn in Hong Kong, and it is something I grew up wearing. It was something I was always proud of because I thought it showed off the beauty of my culture. In our current day and age, this garment has been appropriated many times, whether it be someone wearing it to their prom, Halloween companies using it as an "ethnic costume", Western high fashion taking an "oriental" approach to design or even porn websites using it for yellow fever scenes. This piece is meant to interrogate how this garment has changed in meaning for me, and by extension, comment on how I see myself existing in America.

The dress creates the word 美 (mei), meaning beautiful.

But the same word is used in the phrase for America, 美 国 or the beautiful country. Using this word in the dress questions whether this dress truly represents traditional Chinese beauty, or if it has been completely appropriated and taken by America. This word takes on further meaning because it is my Chinese middle name. The black lace that forms the word also brings up connotations of lingerie, sexualization, and fetishization.

The placement of the opaque cloth just barely covers my body, furthering these ideas.

This work reflects how I see both myself and America. I am the same as the Cheong Sam, as I am truly Chinese but have been completely assimilated into American culture. But at the same time, my Asian body and identity are a place of constant sexualization and fetishization from a Western gaze. I need to constantly question whether I am the colonizer, or the colonized; the appropriator, or the appropriated.”

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INTERVIEW WITH

Written by Kate Anderson-Song

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Jasmine Pecson is a Bay Area singer-songwriter whose music carries the duality of her past and present. Growing up in San Francisco’s Hunter’s Point neighborhood, many of Jasmine’s childhood struggles came from inside her own home, the only escape was to tuck away in some headphones and write to a beat. Now, Jasmine is letting us in to her solace, her sound driven by a desire to tell her story in her own words and on her own terms. Over soulful R&B ballads backed by intricate, tasteful productions, the young self-taught vocalist shares her rawest vulnerabilities and the simultaneous strength it took to become the artist she wants the world to see and hear.

Social profiles: Instagram, Twitter, TikTok: @jasminepecson_ Youtube, Spotify, Apple Music, Tidal, Soundcloud: Jasmine Pecson Website: jasminepecson.com Introduce yourself!

Hi! I’m Jasmine Pecson and I’m a singer out of the Bay Area. I’m in college at the moment as well, I go to SF State. I’m 20 years old, and I’ve been singing since I was very little. This is my dream and I don’t see myself doing anything else in the future other than being a singer, entertainer, all of that.

Introduce your new EP, “Vault #2.”

What inspired it? What is it about?

So my new EP “Vault #2” consists of four songs. So there’s bubblegum, look what you’ve done, moody, and dreamy.

All four of these songs were songs that originally were going to be singles, although I wanted to release something fun and something without a context to it.

I just wanted to release a full body of work, something other than putting singles out all the time. I wanted to release something that people can really appreciate and go through, instead of just hearing four 3 minute songs, within four months. It just so happened that these four songs made the cut, and I created the EP. Look what you’ve done is something I wrote to myself from myself, going through everything that I went through

the past couple years. Dreamy is about me loving a person who I know isn’t good for me, but I continue to go back to them. Bubblegum is the complete opposite, and it is about me finally letting go of that person. Moody, as weird as it may sound, is about my mother.

I wanted each song to be completely different from each other and I wanted this EP to be like a “get ready” for the new sound and for the new album I’m releasing in 2021.

Where do you find inspiration for your songs? What is your songwriting process like?

If not all, most of my songs are a direct access to my life, things I went through, how I felt, and etc. When you listen to each of my songs, you’re listening to a little fragment of something that has happened to me. So a lot of the inspiration comes from myself, but I find inspiration everywhere. I could look at the grass and make an entire song about it in less than five minutes. I could look at the ocean, and grab a pen and paper and just start writing non stop.

My songwriting process is very simple.

I listen to a beat, and really capture how the beat makes me feel. From that feeling I think of either something that

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I went through that reflects that emotion, or I find something related to the emotion. From that, I pick up a melody that matches the beat and start writing.

I love to write and I love word-play and things like that. Writing comes very naturally to me, so I don’t have a specific way of how I word things - it kind of just comes to me as I go.

You are from the Bay Area - how has your environment shaped your music?

What is the music scene like?

Has the area

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“When you listen to each of my songs, you’re listening to a little fragment of something that has happened to me.” changed since you were young?

Our culture here in the Bay is crazy and I can say a lot of the music that I write definitely has gained some inspiration from my environment. Being born and growing up with a lot of people and exposure to Bay Area music, the way we talk, the way we operate - I eventually adapted to it.

Although my music isn’t exactly “Bay Area sound” per say, I can say the way that I write and a couple of the beats are definitely directly inspired. If you were to take my lyrics and ask me to say it normally, you’d definitely be like “oh okay, it makes sense now”.

I would say the music scene here is big, but big in a sense of the city itself. There are a lot of emerging artists, doing the same

thing as me, which makes me a lot more comfortable doing music and being from the city. Knowing that there are people around me doing the same thing, and that would support me as much as I do them, is a good feeling.

The city has definitely changed since I was young. There are a couple things still standing, but a lot of places have been remodeled, or taken down. A lot of art has been covered as well. The city has a new look going on, and it’s pretty sad if you ask me. I loved the way it looked when I was younger growing up, so to see how drastically things have changed is an eye-opener.

just externally but internally.

I know for me, growing up it was hard to really focus on self care and allow myself to work on making sure I was good. There were certain things I would avoid allowing myself to realize and it hindered me from being able to fully be happy and healthy.

Now I really value self-care and the many benefits that come with it. From time to time I meditate and let my body fully relax. I make sure I’m hydrated and eating well. I like to try to stay in a positive mood and mindset as much as possible. Overall, it’s just taking it easy and taking the time to check in with myself.

How has this time of COVID-19 affected you and your music/career? How have you been coping?

COVID has been a real game-changer to say the least. Me being independent means it is a lot harder when it comes to finding studio time, booking photoshoots and videos, and finding online shows. It’s overall made things a lot more difficult but not impossible. I like to just look at things knowing I can control only what I can control, and not stress over the what I can’t. This year has been very challenging, but the music doesn’t stop and the motivation is a lot higher.

Here are some rapid-fire questions:

What does self care mean to you?

How do you take care of yourself?

I think self-care is extremely important and something that people should pay more attention to. Being able to set time aside and really focus on you, really work on things that you want to improve on or just continue maintaining, is a habit everyone should start to catch up on. Before anything, I feel, you should learn to take care of yourself, not

Your go-to coffee shop order?

My go to coffee order is an Iced Grande Oat Milk Vanilla Latte. I’m super picky when it comes to my coffee.

Favorite color?

Favorite color at the moment is purple.

It changes from time to time, though.

Music you’re listening to right now?

Currently listening to a lot of H.E.R. Ultimate comfort food?

Ultimate comfort food is mac and cheese, hands down.

What has been the highlight of your day today?

Genuinely speaking, the highlight of my day is finally settling down and watching EMPIRE. What is next for you?

I’m currently working on my 2nd album.

No official release date yet, but it is set to come out in 2021 - so keep an eye out for that!

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s by Anna Archibald m e o rp othe d n ...a I am a mixed Japanese-American artist and writer from Honolulu, HI, now based in Brooklyn, NY. I currently work as a writer and a bartender, and my work primarily touches on themes of family, memory, and food histories. I am currently working on a poetry chaplet about my experience in the service industry and the act of cooking and eating together.

Social profiles: Instagram: @annaarchibald

winter melon at my auntie’s house, a VHS labeled “internment” that she can’t recall surfaces made of polished wood and step-stools, shrines and ashes and a graveyard of takeout utensils postmaster of her own living room, packages piled with nowhere to go on my fathers dresser, lined up are nail clippers three in a row evidence of my first vandalism, Sanrio sticker on his radio clock in this house we say less with one single flavor of salad dressing and a special communication for feeding the fish at home are carbon copies of my lease renewal shoved above the refrigerator but elsewhere a car I could park with my eyes closed, the crunch of air-dried bath towels, and loading the dishwasher with things that are clean I think maybe once we’re best friends i’ll stop writing about my mother, her bowls of softened winter melon

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google calendar alert: “dad zoom wedding” is it rude to eat at a virtual reception?

I consider this briefly, then snap the brick of noodle in half, measure out half a packet of soup base cutting the powder with the back of a knife I empty the bottom of a bottle over ice and we are sipping this when my new stepmother says to me in the chat box: are you having a drink? I am jealous she keeps her wine off screen I scroll through instagram holding my phone up to maintain eye level, and think of my parents wedding photos where my mom is standing on a box to even out their height, and then we look at these ones, my dad’s now bald head reflecting off the beach facetiming later with my mothers chin, she says I just think it’s funny he didn’t tell me and I shrug, turning my mic on to nervous laugh along with

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6/2020 all of new york city with an expiring lease, 6/2020 for those who are lucky enough to choose to leave or stay the baking has worn out, all ofcollective new yorkbread city with an expiring lease, these same pots pans are now banging of windows, for those who areand lucky enough to choose toout leave or stay with the bang of fireworks that grow more insidious and less celthe collective bread baking has worn out, ebratory each night, I savor the rainbow showers, remembering these same pots and pans are now banging out of windows, my childhood with the bang driveway, of fireworks that grow more insidious and less celdancing barefoot in the streets the neighbor but cringebratory each night, I savor thewith rainbow showers,kids remembering ing at the loudness covering my ears, ducking my head, my childhood driveway, who let these children withwith fire tonight dancing barefoot in theplay streets the neighbor kids but cringcardboard signs hanging from expressways, posted into storeing at the loudness covering my ears, ducking my head, fronts, who let these children play with fire tonight pushed up signs high as a woman silently films from her car cardboard hanging from expressways, posted into storesweat trickles onto the cardboard tucked under my arm and the fronts, edges wilt and everyone’s apartment with a room now for rent, pushed up high as a woman silently films from her car who am I to blame them when I get that selfish freedom feeling, sweat trickles onto the cardboard tucked under my arm and the of google announcing each timewith you’ve crossed state edges wiltmaps and everyone’s apartment a room now for rent, lines in the rental car, and when I slide myself across river rocks who am I to blame them when I get that selfish freedom feeling, through murky runoff, of google maps announcing each time you’ve crossed state different from bodies water I know, the refreshments at lines in the rental car, of and when I slidebut myself across river rocks these parties always the same through murkyare runoff, how hard it is to ask to Ibreathe recycled air different from bodiespeople of water know, but the refreshments at wishing I could make a big soup and feed it to everyone I know, these parties are always the same crying to your friends over this money in our pockets how hard it is to ask people to breathe recycled air that should have been there all along, emptying them for others every day wishing I could make a big soup and feed it to everyone I know, my cotton mask stretches between washes, how permeable are we now

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jumper cables dear mom, you were the first writer i ever knew i’m bad at writing to you but i write about you all the time i have a cold this week, my lungs are rattling and everything feels muffled like laughter behind an orange peel over your teeth my best friend runs her fingers through my hair when i miss you folding skin on my stomach and wondering what you’ll say All Four Of Us together at dinner acting like we eat this way all the time when i’m not sleeping on your couch i can write about a cleaner type of love, like 2 parent family portraits, 2.25 school lunches washing a pot of rice until it’s rinsed clear- a habit i abandoned living on my own clothespins make me think of you and so it’s a shame i can’t hang my own laundry, learned to move delicately washing cling wrap for a second use I love 2-for-1 deals on potato chips and time commitments it’s not perfect but i pay my rent on time, you can borrow my money, i’m not sure whose pride hurts more i’m sorry i killed your car battery, headlights left on so busy crying like a slap on the grill you leave me so medium rare dollar menu fast food chain, chain migration, chain reaction, lost some skin to a chain link fence,

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Thoughts by a First-Gen on Self-Care during Pandemonium Written By Maggie Tse @magswrotethat on IG Maggie Tse is a recent social work graduate and aspiring writer/poet. In her free time, she enjoys bad movies and iced drinks. Like most on the internet, she is also an avid cat lover.

W

hen I went into quarantine a month and a half ago, I was irrationally excited about the swaths of time now available to focus on creating the ideal at-home lifestyle. Maybe pick up a few healthier habits, maybe focus my creative energies and miraculously come out of the pandemic with a writing career in the making. Maybe learn how to cook stuff using the wok without fear. Since I’m currently in my last year of undergrad (social work; also, shoutout to the class of 2020! what a mess!), my main responsibilities included finishing up coursework online and doing some light job-hunting. Mainly I planned to take it easy for a while, as would have been the case whether or not the world was thrown into the Covid-19 pandemic.

To preface, this isn’t my first rodeo of trying to take better care of myself. Selfcare has been an active subject in my life since enrolling in a helping profession four years ago, and especially significant since I started tackling personal issues around two years ago. Helping professions take this stuff seriously; you hear about burnout and compassion fatigue all the time, because they’re very real possibilities when your career means stretching your emotional limits. Add that to the slew of other issues one tends to grapple with while coming-of-age like issues of self-esteem, self-worth, realizing how that thing that happened was actually, to put it politely, quite messed up (and sometimes,

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that’s on trauma)… and you get a riveting contrast of knowledge on the subject, and a sudden realization that you are no exception to it.

Point is, what they say is true; every part of the past is vital to this present moment, and is key to what happens next. So, that’s where I’m at. Definitely not an expert as much as a familiar intermediate; with the aim to share what I’ve learned thus far on my own journey.

Okay, back to the matter at hand. For me, the relationship between self-care and self-harm is strong, likely because when I realized it was time to take better care of myself, it meant swapping/ adding kinder habits to the ones that currently hurt. Selfharm isn’t always blatantly clear and conscious; sometimes it’s as mundane as choosing to not get enough sleep. There are so many passive ways to hurt ourselves, usually to cope with something else going on. Which is valid! But

bad habits just keep on taking. Meanwhile when possible, self-care is more sustainable; it fosters energy and keeps us going.

Half the battle is deciding we believe it’s deserved.

Part of self-compassion is radical self acceptance; radical because emotionally, we may not feel like it’s deserved.

Yet we move forward anyway, because the times we feel we least deserve self love and respect are likely the times when we need it the most. Having yourself in your own corner, as the only one who truly understands your own motivations and reasons, is so much more constructive than its opposite.

I’ve noticed a lot more about my own Chinese cultural background in the past year than I have in awhile, mainly due to my academic placement in a Chinese program within a community centre for seniors.

This experience pushed me to take note of little things that I’d simply taken for granted before. For example, being raised with a general sense of collectiveness; taking care of yourself by taking care of others, and letting them take care of you in return (yet not in a selfish way, either. the value of balance is strong here). While the results aren’t always as ideal (see: traditions like filial piety, or that one Hasan Minhaj joke about how as kids of immigrants, we are the retirement plan), the underlying goal of togetherness and empathy is there.

A truth I’ve stumbled upon in recent years is that it’s easier to care for others than yourself. There are a myriad of branches to this idea; to an individualist, it might sound like a trick into sacrificing yourself for someone else and losing out in the process. But isn’t it true? Giving compliments is so

much easier than accepting them. Cooking someone a meal feels so much more satisfying than just cooking for yourself.

Such is the life of communal beings.

Our behaviours are all based on survival; whatever we’ve kept as we’ve grown is because of this simple monkey-brain psychological conditioning reason: it’s worked in the past. Maybe it’s not necessarily healthy! Not everything is. Not everything will be.

Ultimately, it comes down to owning whatever is weighing on the mind at the moment. We’re problem-solving creaturesour brains seek conflicts and strive to fix them. Trust that your unconscious brain is working on it and take a break, sometimes, too. I’ve found that doing things where I lose track of time, like cooking or writing, helps more for the mood than wallowing in things that can’t be changed.

And for the things that can, maybe I’ll make a plan to change them.

Time is like money that you have no choice but to spend; the remaining question is how. Mindfulness is found in how you most enjoy daydreaming/ thinking in the ways you’re comfortable with, which isn’t always a meditation session. Sometimes it’s taking the time to not rush through brushing your teeth or doing the dishes.

Incorporating healthier habits into daily life is much easier than trying to add a new one to an already full life.

Some final food for thought: Firstly, what do you want? Secondly, what do you need?

And in combination, what do you need to do for yourself to get what you want, and what do you want to do for yourself to get what you need? I’ve learned that overall, the journey of life is simply too short not to ask ourselves what we want out of it.

Illustration inspired by hdbrows.com

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"Gulay Girl (Vegetable Girl)" by Rialin Jose Find her on: Twitter and Instagram Medium: Paint marker & acrylic on 8x8" canvas

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Fervour and Agility (series) by Reeti Roy Medium: Acrylic on canvas

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STUCK IN A

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MAZE

stuck in a maze playlist

SCAN ME!

Artist’s note: every single day i wake up feeling like i’m repeating the previous day. doing the same routine every single day can be tedious and tiresome but then i remember how privileged i am to be alive and to be living the best life though things have been so bleak and boring. therapy has played an important part in my life whether it’s being able to express my feelings to another person without judgment or finding the strength to ask for help, therapy has been incredibly helpful for me and countless Americans and people around the world.

Therapy is really for everyone and something doesn’t have to be “wrong” with you to say that you need help. every day i battle these feelings of confusion and of loss of trying to understand why the world is such a cruel place and how living is so hard but living is one of the most beautiful things in the entire world. getting up on a Saturday morning to pancakes and waffles and drizzling syrup and berries over them, making Sunday brunch with family, presents under the Christmas tree and the holiday spirit and so much joy, the small talks with people who you love and falling in love for the first time and seeing the person you love wrapped up in your arms, seeing you grow up and graduate and accomplish huge milestones, that’s the beauty of living and staying alive. you aren’t weak if you need help. you aren’t selfish for asking and putting yourself first or even saying no. it’s very hard to do all these things every day but making the most of it daily. it’s hard for me as well to say no and to put myself first, i apologize a lot, and can be a mess of emotions sometimes it’s a roller coaster. navigating a relationship during COVID time has also taken a toll on me, not being there for my significant other, not being able to be there to comfort her, and to hold her in times of grief and sadness. it’s been hard putting my emotions together even when it comes to my parents. coming from an Asian household, it’s very hard to be vulnerable yet my parents have tried to make our home homier no matter what yet we still have our ups and down’s and covid has put more of a strain on that. you aren’t alone if you feel distant from your family, distant from friends, or even your significant other. living is a very hard thing but the joys of staying alive are something that gives me an adrenaline rush of happiness. i deserve to be happy. you deserve to be happy. you deserve to be reminded how much you are loved and you can do anything don’t listen to the voices that put you down because you are so much more powerful and so much stronger than those that say that you can’t and i can’t wait to watch when you say you will.

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I remember the smell in the air the day you said your last goodbye tears falling from my face and splattering my homework i remember your sad puppy eyes pulling me in, ready to strike my heart again waiting for you to take control of me again like i’m a widget on a Pac man game ready to run from the ghosts of my past the ghosts hiding the realities of who you were i’m chasing and running to collect the pellets of your words of affirmation since you knew that was my love language the way you maneuvered the handles to make the ghosts kill me every time something that haunts my dreams and makes my life a maze, with other humans being like ghosts that i seem to not be able to adequately communicate with in comparison to you i feel like it’s my fault that we said our last goodbye i see you waving at me from the distance ready for you to turn your back on the possibility of you and i i thought we could rewrite the stars and change the course of our sea of dreams i thought you were my anchor holding me together at the end of the night docking at the nearest port of my city of love my heart racing only for you as you lay your head on my chest feeling my every heartbeat not knowing that my heart cries for you with you the lines moving up and down till my last breath you wonder in my city of love time and time again it’s a place that once you visit you can’t return from you’ve made your mark in my city of love the smell of roses and fresh shampoo saffron in rice and fresh tomatoes picked from the garden garnish me with your words like a blanket wrap me in your humor and smile shower me with laughter and your aura i want to know how you taste as our tongues play a little game of hiding and seek catch me if you can and I’ll surely embrace you with all i possess all my love is for you my smiles are with you my heart beats with you i hope we don’t play a game of Pac man i hope we play a game of love no matter what our definition is grow together not apart drifting together and smoking backwoods in the parking lot by that childhood store you used to go to or that one field where you broke your leg maybe even that ice cream joint your mom raves about

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i hope we play a game of love no matter where it takes us to hell and back swimming through the depths floating in heaven bouncing on cloud 9 no matter what i hope we can play fairly just the two of us but for now, i’m chasing after ghosts with you having the widget in hand maneuvering my course while i float through my sea of dreams yet i realize that life and relationships can be blind jumping into uncharted waters with no escape but my mind going down a rabbit hole of hypotheticals struggling to find the words to say no and move on I’m still hung up on some things from my past regretting the moments i just sat and watched the time pass by I’m lost in translation trying to find meaning in love that I’ve given if i can be the best daughter or even the best friend i need for myself i remember some nights just feeling so broken my pillowcase knowing my story better than anybody struggling to keep my voice down so that my parents don’t wake up “weak,” they said whenever i would cry i felt like my mind was the only place that tried to understand me my friends never did nor did they check in to hear me out to understand what my inner soul had to say to hear the words I’ve been dying to say to them “selfish,” they said whenever i took time for myself “broken and needy” I’ve heard in my past relationships where it was like two ships crossing lost in translation trying to decipher my inner demons i feel like i’m a lock and someone else has the key but right as someone turns the key it just jams and i’m locked in my head with just my thoughts and maybe even a pen “lonely” are what i feel a majority of the time just brooding in my room i grew up hearing how i couldn’t handle the truth how i take everything for granted and don’t deserve to be loved properly yet i wish i could go back in time and tell my younger self that i’m okay i will be okay and i will grow to be the best person for me like a plant, i need to water myself “peace” something that i crave for a moment to myself where there is no chaos there is no feeling of being broken or feelings of grief and loss it’s like resewing my life but i have the thread this time i’m going to pick my colors and I’ll understand that life has its hiccups but I’ll be ready to sew my own destiny -divya chhotani

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The Odd Man (or Person) Out Written By Jennie Vallangca @jennvallangca on IG Jennie Vallangca is currently working in the food industry as a food safety specialist, freelance food/drinks writer and recipe developer based out of Canada. She graduated from Niagara College’s Culinary Innovation and Food Technology program and will remind you that she’s not just a chef. In her spare time (if she has any), she loves to draw, do sports (but not limited to muay thai, fencing and cycling), read, explore new foods and drinks and looking at memes. Also she’s not responsible for making anyone hungry whilst talking about food and/or drinks.

I

magine this: you graduated college during the pandemic and decided to move to a new city because you’re tired of living comfortably in your parent’s home in one of the most expensive cities in Canada. You’re trying to make your mark without the help of your family to prove to yourself and them that you’re capable of being independent. Heck, you have done that since your first year of undergrad.

Fast forward to the new year: you still live in that new city, started a corporate job in one of the largest companies in the country, as well as writing for a local food and drinks magazine, AND you are serving your country on a part-time basis. Yeah, that sounds like the characteristics of an overachiever doesn’t it?

And yet, I still feel like I’m not doing enough.

Being the only child of immigrant parents, as well as being an immigrant myself, it doesn’t feel like I did a lot. My parents and I have many different experiences, but nothing beats giving up high level positions and a government job to move to a country, only to start over again so you are able to have a better future.

Everyone in my family are in the usual “professional” fields: healthcare, business

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(ie. accounting), law, engineering, so on and so forth. And here I am, a professional in the food industry working in food safety, as well as a food/drinks writer and a freelance recipe developer. Meanwhile, my cousins are doctors, pharmacists, accountants and nurses. It has some sort of prestigious feel to it since food is deeply embedded into our cultural roots but when you hear someone say, “oh I am a food/ drinks writer, freelance recipe developer and a food safety professional”, you have to explain to them why that should be held in the same level as the fields previously mentioned.

I did dabble in multiple fields before somewhat deciding on what I want to do. Originally I wanted to be a chef but after working in the kitchen, I decided it wasn’t for me. There were times that I was struggling between working with food and computers or doing law because I was really interested in those three; I was in the culinary arts program, participated in a robotics competition and was in mock trial in high school (and other extracurricular activities). Those three are completely different fields and I could have chosen the other two. I was fixated on food because that was a form of creativity and I could get a job out of it. It was something that it could be safe and yet, it has some risks to it.

Furthermore, I am serving as a reservist in the Canadian military. Being the only person (that I know of) in my family that did not commission to become an officer feels like being a black sheep. Whether it be an infantry officer or a medical officer, it felt like I wasn’t good enough to be one and all it led to is being an army cook. But the difference between them and myself is that I enjoy feeding troops out in the field or on base. I still had to endure basic training and it was a challenge. It was an experience that not everyone in my family had done, but it is one of those things that I am truly proud of.

Overall, I should be proud of my achievements and what my goals are in life. I want to say to them, “hey, I made a contribution to society with food and you should not make me feel like my career is not on par with the others”. I want to be confident in my passions and not just be a cookie cutter that is under immense pressure just to be “safe”. I learned that there should be a balance between being “stable” and living your authentic self.

Yes I am juggling three jobs/careers, but this is just a stepping stone towards what I want to do. And I may be the odd person out here, but at least I am being myself.

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I

EW I V R NTE

H T I W

vada a Cheruku h k e l i

by Sr

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Srilekha Cherukuvada is a freelance writer based in Austin, Texas. She has multiple bylines in Business Insider, Urban Asian, The Tempest, Redefy, and more. Srilekha also founded a nonprofit organization, Plannr Consulting, focused on spreading mental health awareness.

To learn more about Srilekha, visit http://simplysrilekha.com or connect with her on Instagram, Twitter, or LinkedIn. Social profiles: Instagram: @devishijha / @bevoyagers Website: http://simplysrilekha.com With the ongoing climate crisis, sustainability has become a priority for many.

Environmental activists have risen up in protests, campaigns, and have taken to social media to encourage everyone, including big businesses, to be more sustainable and limit their carbon emissions. These inspiring advocates are fighting for a better future; our future.

And, Devishi Jha is doing exactly that.

“I’d like to see environmental initiatives introduced by both public and private sectors that benefit all people, not just a select few. ”

Jha joined Zero Hour as the Partnerships Director and has ever since fought for a more sustainable future. More recently, Jha became the Co-Founder of Voyagers, a youth-led platform consulting with businesses, such as IKEA, on sustainability in relation to Gen Z. As an Asian-American, Jha has encountered both challenges and successes in her work as an environmental advocate, which she discusses below.

Tell us your story. How did you start environmental advocacy?

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I remember watching a video in middle school about what would happen if the world’s average temperature rose six degrees. As I watched natural disasters increase with greater intensity and frequency and WW3 starting over drinking water, I knew that I needed to find a way to advocate for change. I became a volunteer for Zero Hour in 2019, and currently serve as their Partnerships Director.

I also advocate for sustainable business and environmental economics at my company, Voyagers.

What is Voyagers and what inspired you to begin this initiative?

Voyagers is a platform that serves as a GenZ amplifier for sustainable brands. The idea stemmed from my interest in business, economics, and environmental science. After researching more about company supply chain and corporate responsibility, I realized that there was a niche GenZ could fill in advocating for sustainable business. This eventually led to the creation of Voyagers.

How does it feel to be working with brands like Sephora, IKEA, and Clif Bar? It’s definitely surreal to be able to work with brands I’ve seen throughout my childhood, especially in such a short period of time (Voyagers has been active for less than 7 months). But it is also exciting to see how brands are changing their core business model to account for sustainability, something never-before-seen by fortune 500 companies.

What does a sustainable future look like to you?

A sustainable future is one that is able to maintain longevity and prosperity for all. We have made enormous progress in recent years to account for DEI (diversity, equity, and inclusion) in the private sector, as well as workers health and safety initiatives, but there is still much to be done. I’d like to see environmental initiatives introduced by both public and private sectors that benefit all people, not just a select few.

What is your advice for a young activist trying to get involved?

I always offer this piece of advice: don’t hesitate to reach out! If you find an organization (or want to start something new) that speaks to your values and beliefs, then don’t hesitate to send an email or text to get involved.

It’s that easy.

“I hope that my own work in activism allows more Asian-Americans like me to enter the space and contribute in a meaningful way.”

I hope that my own work in activism allows more Asian-Americans like me to enter the space and contribute in a meaningful way.

Where do you see yourself in five years?

In five years, I hope to continue my activism and entrepreneurial work in all facets of sustainability!

What impact do you hope Voyagers will have in the upcoming year?

I hope Voyagers is able to amplify the work of many sustainable brands this year, as well as be a catalyst for change in the corporate sector; I hope that Voyagers is able to change the core of corporate business models, placing sustainability at the same pedestal as financial returns.

What challenges have you faced as an Asian American in your industry?

Being an Asian-American immigrant has definitely caused challenges in the activism and corporate space, but these spaces are constantly evolving to become more inclusive and welcoming.

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Written By Shreya Rajappa @shreyarajappa on IG A high school student living in sunny California, Shreya Rajappa enjoys writing creative non-fiction and impassioned Op-Ed articles. She credits her intersectional identity as a bisexual, feminist young woman with Indian and Sri Lankan parents for her desire to become involved in journalism to represent others who share aspects of her identity and to bring awareness to social issues involving marginalized communities. In her free time, she watches movies, takes pictures, tie-dyes clothes, and plays basketball.

“T

ick, tock. Tick, tock.” As the hands of the clock on the wall above slowly inch towards giving them ultimate freedom, the characters in High School Musical 2 can’t help but stare at them, already wistfully dreaming of summer. Throwing their papers into the air as the school bell finally rings shrilly and signals the end to their school day and year, the characters move into a full-blown song and dance number called “What Time Is It?”. High school movies like this one have faced good-natured slack for not providing an accurate depiction of high school in America because unfortunately, most students don’t jump onto tables and suddenly start singing and dancing at any high school.

Regardless, in terms of the basic elements that make up the education system including extracurriculars, free-time, the school structure, advanced classes, and average student success, these movies actually mirror real life in America. If we look towards the East, however, school couldn’t be more different.

Take your regular school day in America.

Then, add about 3 hours. Keeping students in the classroom far longer than their American counterparts, schools in Taiwan and Shanghai, China, for example,

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have between 9.5 and 9.8 hour school days. Additionally, while Japan’s school day may officially end at a similar time as American ones, Japanese students typically enroll in a gakudo, an after-school program where they continue learning into the evening. Finally, as “cram schools” pull at Korean students and take up their evenings, they often stay at school for up to 12 hours per day.

Emphasizing the “all work and no play” mentality of Asian students, an Asian-American high school principal in California shared that when she had attended high school in South Korea, she had 6-day school days, entering the building at 7am every day and exiting the campus at 10pm on weekdays and at 2pm on Saturdays. Additionally, because of the lack of free time after school, her fellow Korean students and herself didn’t participate in extracurricular activities. If someone excelled at sports or arts, they would attend programs dedicated to molding the best in those fields and activities. For example, a friend of hers played basketball, so that friend would play basketball for 8 hours per day at school. Of course, this source attended high school years ago, but the idea of long school days and a

lack of free time still stands true in South Korea today.

At first glance, Western and Asian education systems seem somewhat similar in regards to their curriculums. In Taiwan, Hong Kong, Korea, Japan, Vietnam, and China, the curriculum includes Language Arts, Health and Physical Education, Social Studies, Arts and Humanities, Mathematics, Science and Technology, and Integrative Activities. To the majority of students in the USA, these subjects sound familiar. However, many Asian countries like Korea and Japan also mandate the instruction of Moral Education, teaching students about safety and environmental issues and how to lead a life of discipline, courtesy, and confidence while always employing manners and etiquette.

Additionally, while American schools only have to answer to state requirements, the curriculum in Asian countries is decided at the federal level.

Differing in more than just school structure, Asian and American education systems are also built on different perceptions and expectations of their students. While classes at different levels ranging from Advanced Placement to those where the students are considered “low-performing” are prevalent in America, these different levels aren’t present in Asian schools. Rather, the Asian education system instructs their students with one governing philosophy in mind: that every student has the ability to succeed academically and meet high expectations. If a student falls behind in class or struggles with a particular subject in Asia, then they’ll receive all of the resources they need -- including excellent teachers, tutors, and additional materials -- to catch up to their peers.

For example, in Singapore, the results of a mathematics and literacy assessment given to first graders point educators

towards the students that may need more assistance, and from there, these first graders receive additional and better teachers, especially those who are apt at teaching struggling students. In order to get the students to where they are expected to be, these teachers meet with them before school, after school, and sometimes on Saturdays. Similarly, low-income and moderate-to-high-income schools in Shanghai work together so that the low-income students receive the same curriculum and excellent instruction while in Japan, low-performing students receive tutoring, homework-help, and better connections with the school system through university students’ subsidized volunteer work.

Instead of holding every student to the same high standards and simply giving struggling students more support like what is done in Asia, American schools differ in that they separate “low-performing” students from “high-performing” ones and teach the former less advanced subject matter while placing the latter in advanced classes. While the benefit of “ability-grouping” could be that students feel more comfortable in their classes, we have to consider what it would be like if America adopted an Asian approach to education. Perhaps, students would have higher self-esteem, knowing that even though they struggled initially, they were able to succeed in the end to the same level as their peers. And maybe, these students would also feel more cared for by their teachers considering that these teachers would be putting in long hours to help get them up to speed, forming closer, valuable relationships.

Without analyzing the results of these education systems, our comparison of Asian and American schools wouldn’t be complete. Based on the 2016 report from the Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development, less than 5% of 15-yearold students in Hong Kong, Shanghai,

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South Korea, and Vietnam fell below the “basic-proficiency level” in science, reading comprehension, and mathematics while 12% of students of the same age in America failed to meet that same proficiency standard. Similarly, while America’s average student ranks the lowest in performance when compared to all 64 countries analyzed by the OECD in 2016, East Asian countries like China, Singapore, Hong Kong, and South Korea, all ranking in the OECD’s top ten in terms of student performance, have a high average student performance. However, what an American student lacks in test scores, they make up for in confidence, persistence, and an inclination to follow their own dreams instead of pleasing others. Due to grade inflation that resulted in 30% of American students receiving As and American teachers tending to encourage mistakes, students in America tend to take more risks and leaps of faith concerning their academic and career paths compared to Asian students who prize always making the right choices and avoiding mistakes.

Patriots through and through, there are Americans who continue to called the USA the #1 country in the world even as our students don’t excel at language arts or mathematics as much as those in other countries. Since students and the younger generation are the future of our country and world, it’s imperative that we rework our priorities, placing students at the top.

While the previous administrations have attempted to do so with policies such as the No Child Left Behind Act of 2001 and the Every Student Succeeds Act of 2015, these have ultimately failed in truly supporting students and helping them learn since it forced teachers to teach to the test instead of allowing teachers to spend more individualized time with students in need of assistance. The USA could learn from Asian countries in this regard and would benefit from adopting an outlook similar to theirs that every student

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can succeed at a high level if given the resources they need, allocating more instruction and support to struggling students while still teaching these students the same curriculum.

However, this isn’t to say that Asian schools are perfect and that America is completely failing its students. Even though Asian students test well and learn loads while in school, they face intense academic environments and pressure and don’t have opportunities to explore interests or learn about who they are outside of school. Their schedules afford essentially no free time, preventing these students from learning that their grades don’t determine their worth, something that American teachers try to ingrain in their own students early on. In America, students get to be more than just students, partaking in extracurricular activities and hobbies, instead of just focusing on academics, which is essential for personal growth and maturity. Thus, it’s all about balance.

Through using positive elements of both American and Asian education systems such as more resources for struggling students, encouragement for students to find their passions outside of academics, and an elimination of ability grouping, we can create a new type of education system that surpasses the rest, allowing students to grow into the best versions of themselves both professionally and personally.

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identity Written By Aishah Khan @aishahk.ak/@ak.mixtapes on IG

@aishaishy95 on Twitter

Aishah Khan is a wannabe artist and photographer and she’s passionate about enacting change and challenging the status quo. She’s got a BA in human rights and hopes to put it to work someday, however right now she’s just trying to enjoy life, draw, and spend time in the outdoors.

Sometimes when I consider my journey with identity, it makes me cringe - so much of my time, stress, energy has been expended on my dwelling on it. I feel like this is a typical staple of the young diaspora community, most notably children of immigrants. No one before us (our parents and grandparents) had the time or the luxury of pondering that question of “Who am I?” They were more likely working themselves raw in the interest of creating a life for their children and grandchildren and descendants to come. Now, those of us who have had that done for us enjoy the comfort and languor that comes with being established, having roots in more than one place, no matter how distant they may be. Not to say that this goes for all children of immigrants or diaspora youth - it has been my own experience, and something I feel is prevalent in my own community.

My identity has been a struggle for many years now - I have been confused and ashamed and lost and hurt and proud. I am not entirely satisfied with it yet but at the least I have moved past the need to hide myself, to shrink away from the sun in the summer months lest my skin darken into a less ambiguous tone, and to insist that all my white friends know that I’M JUST LIKE YOU. I’M NORMAL!!! LIKE ME!!! ACCEPT ME!!! PLEASE. MY DAD SPEAKS WITH A FUNNY ACCENT BUT HE KNOWS ENGLISH I SWEAR HE’S BEEN IN CANADA LONGER THAN HE WAS IN PAKISTAN MY MOM GREW UP HERE PLEASE I’M NORMAL I’M - I’m done.

Conversely, I am also done doing the opposite. Trying to express my deep cultural and ancestral roots as loudly as possible, wanting everybody to look, and be beguiled by my different-ness.

Wanting everybody to fully f--king see me. Weaving cultural regalia into my casual dress, including “diaspora bee-yotch” in my Instagram bio, searching up a Steve Mccurry image of an exploited village girl who fits my new aesthetic in her long black braid and bright dupatta and clunky naat to use as my profile picture. Scorning ignorant white people, refusing to acknowledge that annoying as they were, maybe they were just naive. Now, I’m at ease, I don’t really care about what anyone wants to see. I am me. I don’t need to justify it to anyone. If you can’t say my name, I don’t care, like don’t choke on it, but don’t be obnoxious either. If you have a question that’s genuine, don’t worry, ask me nicely and I’ll answer it to the best of my knowledge. I don’t need to suffer the whole “straddled by my two identities, miles apart yet eternally connected, like the relations between Pakistan and India’’ gimmick - because honestly it sucks sometimes, but I’m not really suffering. I’m fine, I’m safe, I’m not toiling day and night to build a home and life from scratch to benefit those who will come after me more than it will likely benefit me. I’m just a little bit frustrated at times, that’s all.

The problem is, even though I’ve overcome this crisis of identity, I still hurt. I still remember every person who asked if my dad was a terrorist, I still remember all the careless and often cruel things my friends or peers said about me as a joke. I remember these things so clearly and I can still feel how I felt when they were said to me in the moment. I was watching a Youtube video essay on racism in the beauty community and the Youtuber, Salem Tovar, expressed something that I have felt all my life - the implicit awareness that somehow, I’m ugly because I didn’t have the features I saw on all my friends. And I was validated in thinking this because it is how I was

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made to feel by all those harsh comments, and how I was treated by boys and by the pretty girls.

The reason it still hurts is because it meant something to me, it affected me. All the white people, classmates and bullies and friends, they don’t remember as clearly or with the same rage and hurt because it didn’t mean anything to them. It was just casually thrown into conversation at my expense. And trust me, I wasn’t silent. I spoke up. I said stop, it’s not funny. But that didn’t really work out - being the only brown girl around, I was quickly silenced, told not to overreact because it was just a joke, gaslit. When I was in the eighth grade I broke my silence and said to my closest school friends that they needed to stop, because it wasn’t funny. I wasn’t going to fly a helicopter over the school and blow it up, ok? And the response? My friends completely iced me out. They stopped talking to me. For a bit over a month in the eighth grade, I was completely alone. I would hide in the bathroom at recess, or go find my older sister. No one talked to me.

No one would acknowledge me. Eventually when we started talking again, I relented because I was so lonely and vulnerable, not because anyone said sorry. And it’s not like the comments stopped, either. I just had to make the best of the situation because it was me against everyone else. So even if i say I’m over it, I don’t need to prove myself to anyone anymore, I do mean it, but this visceral rage and pain isn’t going anywhere. It is a part of who I am. It is why I prefer to distance myself from groups dominated by white people, it is why I always speak my mind and people find me difficult. Maybe if I wasn’t treated that way in my youth, not only by the mean kids but my closest friends, I’d be softer, less confrontational. But I am a result of my experiences, and even though I don’t feel the need to fight back every single moment anymore, there are still times I boil over with anger and resentment for those moments in my life, and I lash out.

That’s what happened to me, and this is my way of dealing with it.

Now I’m older, and I treat myself better. I spend time with people who don’t consider me a joke.

I’m Aishah, Montreal-born to immigrant parents, raised in Ottawa. Not the girl tragically ripped from the motherland, veins surging with the raw juices of the pumping mango that is my heart.

Not A-ee-sha, or Alisha or Eishia, or whatever else your brain lazily reads my very pronounceable name as. I’m not like you, my parents aren’t like yours, they’re like theirs and when I go home and my dad is squawking Urdu love ballads in the basement or watching Whatsapp videos sent from his third cousin 700 times removed on his uncles mothers side on full blast while I’m trying to watch the Vampire Diaries in the living room I’m annoyed, but no longer embarrassed, no longer wanting to shrink myself and stifle my father’s blatant brown-ness. My mom might be shut up in her room writing or she might be also in the living room, blasting some old rock song on her computer and watching fan made videos of Richard Armitage akin to those I used to watch made by Hermione-Ron romance shippers in 2007. She may be cooking up a delicious storm of “smelly curry” or as Desis call it, salaan or korma. They may be together, squabbling comfortably, quipping in Urdu or Punjabi to annoy the other. Whatever. It’s normal whether or not my white peers think it is.

Arriving at this place of comfort and acceptance has been arduous and I know I still have a ways to go. And I’m excited! I love where I come from, and I try not to romanticize it, but am critical of it, just as I am of any other country on this Earth. But I’m not mad anymore. I’m not jealous.

I’m not itching to crawl out of my skin and change my heritage. Because I’m more than where I come from! I’m more than where I grew up! I’m an imperfect amalgamation of those places, and I am lucky to be. The thing I’m most proud of is letting go of that need to prove myself to white people - that desperation to want them to understand I’m normal, the same, or even different and interesting. It no longer matters to me what they think. I don’t need to appeal to them, and the wonderful thing is that I no longer want to. I’m free! And I’m spoiled. I get to pick what elements of each culture I want to incorporate into my life. I have so much. I have something that is mine - my background, my identity - and it has nothing to do with anyone else, and now that I’ve come to understand that I can just live. I can just be Aishah.

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Poems by Deena Umeda Tan I can never be her. So secure in myself I can tan my skin to a beautiful bronze.

I can hide from the sun forever but I will never be white like Her.

Spit

It rained last night. So I spit on the dry pavement because I thought she felt left out.

(I cannot tell her that I am happy the way I am)

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Poems by Yuu Ikuda Yuu Ikeda is a Japan based poet. She writes poetry on her website. Her published poems are “Sinful Silhouette” in <Rigorous>, “Broken Pieces of the Truth” in <Briefly Zine>, “A Flickering Light” in <Kalonopia>, and more.

“I Want To Write Poetry Like …”

“My Words On My Notebook”

“POETRY”

A cup of potage in the cold morning

My words are wandering in my heart, trembling but hiding the fear I write a lot of vague shadows to give them place where they can become clear shapes

To shattered life, to life that time stopped, to life crouching on the bed, to life that became small, POETRY adds colors, pains, happiness, and heat

The sunlight pouring into the room at winter noon A glass of brandy in front of the heater Tones of violoncello Sounds of a typewriter in the silence Scents of freshly baked bread and brewed coffee Scents of fallen leaves piling up on the ground Winter wind caressing cheeks Transient warmth and intoxication The escape from the reality The bottom of calm Waves of relief Travel to where there is no one

My words are overflowing in my heart, wailing but sometimes smiling They hasten me again and again Flaring words in the darkness kindle me again and again They whirl on my notebook and become complex So, I can’t find the perfect answer But I must continue to write because they hasten me and kindle me every time I write

It is like a diary It equals living It is the communication with this world It is my breath POETRY is like that the moonlight waxes in my heart, the sunlight soaks into my skin, glowing light, and silent and frozen light pouring into me

They give me colors of sadness, tones of loneliness, and despair to happiness I give them place where they become clear shapes and they can breathe freely

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Poems by Tanvi Nagar Tanvi Nagar is a student of class 11 at Delhi Public School, Gurgaon. She has been writing for the past eight years and is passionate about public speaking, travelling, playing sports and reading. She has contributed to national newspapers like ‘The Times of India’ and ‘Hindustan Times’; magazines like the ‘Neev Magazine’ and ‘Children’s World’ and anthologies like ‘The Last Flower of Spring’ and ‘Riding on a Summer Train’ by Delhi Poetry Slam; ‘The Great Indian Anthology’ by Half Baked Beans and ‘She the Shakti’ by Authors Press.

She is the Editor in her school and has authored three books titled, ‘A Treasure Trove of Poetic Wonderland’ ‘A Bountiful of Rhythmic Stories’ and ‘My Book of Short Stories and Poems’ and two research papers which were published in the International Journal of Multidisciplinary Educational Research.

She has won the Eye Level Literary Award 2018 by Daekyo, South Korea; the Create Change Challenge 2020 by the University of Queensland, Australia; the Millennial Essay Writing Contest by UNESCO and Takthe; the Haryana State Badminton Championship 2013-14; and has worked with organisations like The Global Leadership and Education Foundation and The Faridabad Education Council to serve the community.

The Warrior Rising The Dragon 1. She was five when her father gifted her a locket Inside of this lies a dragon “Call him when you need him.”

He will protect you from the evils of the world He will fend off those who weaken your spirit Oh! How she kept that locket safe Guarding Protecting Preserving it.

The Hues 3. She was fifteen when she was told Wear these coloursWhite, pink and maybe yellowThey are your lucky ones They won’t let any harm come to you Oh! Then on, she was clad in only some shades Pinks Whites Yellows.

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The Locket 2. She was seven when she wore another threadA necklace sort of thing This time it was round her neck The precious stones will protect you Never remove this necklace Oh! How she kept that locket close Guarding Protecting Preserving it.

The Warrior-Her 4. She was seventeen when she needed this luckIn a dark alley way, when all the evil came to her She remembered the dragon, She remembered the clothes She had the locket so close Yet, she couldn’t feel the super powers.

No. But she felt the dragons inside her rising She felt the universe and stars aligning No, this wasn’t the magic of the stones or rings It was her power The power of the warrior rising.

Chrysalis I sat in a dimly lit room and began to flip the dusty journal’s pages, ‘My life’- the first page said- ‘Every detail in this journal I have narrated’ My grandmother’s words, her handwriting preserved perfectly through time, “This journal begins on 18th September 1800, it will end with the end of my life, They call me a warrior, they call me a fighter-mother, lover, daughter too, I have been all of them, not a single day of my life has been rued, When I came into this world they labelled me as a housewife-nothing more, A slave-born to live and die inside four walls- “What more is a girl even worthy for?”

“You must die with your husband, he’ll live with you for seven lives,” mother said, (He’s twenty-seven years elder to me-he’s on his death bed) (How can I die before I have begun to achieve my dreams-Yes! I have dreams too, How can I jump into a fire for him-I will not, mother dear, I will not do this for you).

They told me to marry him like my mother did when I was barely nine, To sacrifice my body, my mind- devote myself to their service-for my lifetime, I was loaded with a cart full of riches, my value calculated in bills and money, Father- “He will treat you well, dear- we have given him whatever he wanted as dowry” While he read the Gita, he commanded- “Lady, go get me some hot tea.”

I took the book from the table, while he slept-the letters like designs looking quirky, That’s how I learnt to read the Holy books, pen down biographies and write, That’s how I went on to lead India’s freedom struggle-studying under the night light.”

A tear flowed down my cheek, I snapped back into my reality, To a world where there are thousands of women-no longer oppressed with brutality, A world where there has been progress, there have been massive leaps and bounds, Today women are astronauts-reaching the stars and clouds, rising above the ground.

Today girls attend school, girls know of their rights, girls are have travelled miles, Today girls know that they needn’t be clad in red sarees- they are beautiful when they smile.

Today girls can go to temples, churches, mosques- follow their heart’s calls, Girls are overcoming barriers, crossing obstacles and breaking suffocating walls.

In my diary, I began to write- ‘My life’-each and every detail I described, “I was born in 2000-welcomed as not a ‘boy’ or ‘girl’-but simply a child, I went to school with my brother, went to college too, They said-be a doctor, an astronaut, lawyer- do whatever you want to pursue.

The era has changed, the world is slowly turning into a paradise, Female foeticide has reduced, people have begun to value the girl child’s life, Women can step out of their house safely after the so-called ‘curfew’, They can all blossom like flowers whose petals are coated with fresh dew, That’s how the era has metamorphosed-like a caterpillar and butterfly, To the next generation reading this diaryMake the world a finer place, never lose the spirit to try and try.”

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The Oasis She pictured the forestsShe heard the moonlit darkness call Inside the darkness, she felt She would have solitude and calm.

So she walked into the jungle A little light was all she had The trees loomed The animals cried out The winds blew strong.

It was then that she began to realise That she had understood it all wrong The darkness was an oasis of its kind It couldn’t bring more light All it would do to her was misguide.

So she turned back and made her way The anxiety loomed Pain made her cry out The winds blew strong.

This time she wasn’t running away Fighting Struggling Growing A warrior in the making.

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Poems by Citra Benazir “The Thing That Makes The Wind”

“I Just Want You”

I can’t believe it Is it really sunlight I’m feeling Kissing my skin Pressing my pores Oh it’s been too long Bare it all under the sun As the pearly beads of sweat run down Between my breasts Between my thighs Gentle gift of immense pleasure Gripped below Shaped like something familiar Short breaths and sighed relief From a hard and elongated handle A rush of breeze Amidst the humidity A sensual mist

Let me give you a moment to define the feeling of longing for someone Do you call it lust? or desire?

Do you just call it passion?

Or do you simply miss them?

At times it reaches further Missing is too narrow a word Too shallow of what can only Be pronounced as Wanting Right here and now Though never could I admit to such a thing And never could you admit to such a thing For yet another day We shall remain nameless We shall remain occupied We shall remain indefinite Until our silence gives itself up

“Expendable Life” I like being isolated.

With nobody but myself.

With nobody but love.

With nobody but my present being.

I used to loathe being alone.

Because that’s all I’ve known.

I used to loathe how I spoke to myself.

How my mind spoke to me.

I never realized that was freedom.

I never realized that was freedom.

I want to be free.

I want to be free.

Free like I’ve got nothing to lose.

Free like at any moment I can leave.

Free like at any moment I can disappear.

Free like there’s no tomorrow.

Maybe there isn’t.

Who knows, am I right?

Maybe I can just vanish.

Who knows, maybe that’s just what I prefer.

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“Looking for 故乡, or home, or something else”

by Angela Dong It is so humbling To be a foreigner in your homeland To meet strangers that should be family And to trip over a language that should be yours So I find myself homesick for places I have never called home And nostalgic for places I have never visited I wander the world Finding comfort in foreign lands And unfamiliar tongues Until airports become my second home (My first is the Earth itself) As I continue searching for

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A space in which I truly belong

Suitcase by Isabel Lee Roden My mother repacks my suitcase for me I did it once, I am good at packing.

But not so good as her.

She re-rolls each shirt tightly, tightly wound, and crammed elegantly into a square. She finds symmetry

where I am more comfortable playing building blocks with my own brand of disorder.

I pack and the suitcase nearly bursts with keepsakes, dresses, flip flops.

She packs and my whole life flattens out - all but disappears.

As if she has made me smaller. I am easier to travel with now.

I was already all but packed, I did not ask her for help.

As if the lack of a request holds any weight.

She shows me how to fold my denim jeans so that they will lay flat and unobtrusive.

She does not realize

she is showing me how to take the work out of my loved one’s hands.

We say “let me do that for you” and it is as close as we can get to

“I love you.”

We say “let me do that for you” and it means “I think you are incompetent.”

For the women of my house, these sentiments are not mutually exclusive.

We are a legacy of women who believe they know best because they have always had to. Women who feel a

responsibility to love because

love has always come with responsibilities.

We say “let me do that for you” because a long time ago, though not as long as I might think, my grandmother packed all our history’s hopes in a suitcase, because it is what she was taught she owed to her future.

So that she could build a house, so that my mother could fill it.

This house, packed heavy with the weight of

responsibility.

Nearly bursting with what we owe to each other.

54 More than enough to fill a suitcase.

“To the lover…..” by Ashritha Muppidi Amusement strikes my brain cells, heaviness strikes my heart.

What a joy it is to offer you my thoughts, what a pain it is to fear they’d be less amusing to you.

On rainy days (read: every day) I have the urge to be entangled within you and not make sense out of this world; some days you’re too much, other days I need more of you.

I slip fast into the cascade of thoughts, and never for once, the depth of you was diluted; I don’t promise, I cherish, I cherish till you last, till this hurt becomes normal and till your fragrance smells like home.

It was not easy knowing you, it was some days boring too.

Meet me in paradise, under the stars above the chaos, let’s live a lie this love has to offer; Your bare chest was a burial ground and I wanted to die before being born.

This love of ours knows the space we fit in well, yet, gives us voids we devour till death

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“searching for clues” by Divya Chhotani Artist’s note: “unrequited love is something that many people face behind closed doors. the feeling of walking next to someone you love and the giddy feeling you get when you’re around them and surrounded by their contagious energy yet the dread you feel when you see them talking to someone else. these feelings that rush through your body whenever you see someone that you like but once you’re behind closed doors you let it all out on your pillowcase and your tears show your true feelings that your words can’t even begin to describe. this poem is for those who may be in love with someone who doesn’t know they exist or you may be hiding your feelings from them. i’ve been in this same position countless times but what helped get me through this was journaling my feelings away or even just “shooting my shot” as they say these days. you’re so valid and your feelings matter. if you feel comfortable telling them your feelings i hope they are receptive but if you’re scared and apprehensive hopefully this poem can relate to you and be your “inner anthem” during this time. remember someone out there in this world will love you even the parts you’re afraid of and will embrace your flaws. you are so loved and i know that things will look brighter soon.” i’m struggling to spit out the words you’ve been dying to hear the words that lovers gobble up and misconstrue and break i’m struggling to say three words to you because i know how it feels to be broken in two to have lost my sense of purpose and direction my pillowcase knowing my story better than anyone ever will the three words you’re dying to hear is something that makes me cry gives me butterflies yet i’m scared our relationships evolve like caterpillars to butterflies the honeymoon phase is the cocoon stage where everything is flowing is solid motion my love for you not wavering no earthquake in my throat yet i’m afraid that once our relationship gets to that butterfly stage you’ll feel like all of me is already laid out on the table you’d get bored of me and toss me to the side that the words i love you will lose its meaning that maybe i’m not good enough for you i’m trying to convince myself that it wouldn’t happen that you are in love with another with someone that jumps from person to person i’m trying to convince myself that you aren’t for me because someone like you can’t be with someone like me i’m broken trying to figure out who we could be you’re like a safety net that catches me in my darkest times when i fall down hearing my bickering and dealing with my nagging you’re the most beautiful butterfly out there free-spirited soaring like a bird intricate lil beauty i’m trying to convince myself that i’m the one for you

that you don’t need anyone else i’m trying to be the best for you to see that smile at the end of the day to have you laughing on the daily i hope you don’t get bored of me i hope you don’t get bored of me i just want you to grow with me explore with me be like curious george and explore the knicks and crannies of everywhere we go i don’t want to lose myself in your love i want to fly like the butterfly you are spread your wings and fly into my arms i hope you can hold me when i cry at the end of a long day bring me coffee when i’m struggling to stay awake but i’m lost tumbling in trying to find ways to make you stay but then i realize it’s all in my head the overthinking and the jumping to conclusions thinking that you could be mine but i’m struggling to find the words to tell you that i can’t do this anymore that i can’t love someone who won’t love me back i can’t love someone who can’t see the stars that shine in my eyes for them who realizes all my smiles are just for them when there is silence all around i can’t love someone who can’t get me the moon who can hold me when i cry and lonely but i can’t love someone who doesn’t realize that i love them through the signals and through the smoke i’m waving my white flag and surrendering i hope you’re the person that actually stays and sees me for me i hope in another lifetime we can be meant to be i hope i can see you and i hope i can be yours but now i’m just re reading old texts thinking of what we could be

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Elizabeth Su, MA is a writer, perfectionism expert, and the founder of Monday Vibes (elizabethsu.com), a female-focused newsletter named one of the “12 Newsletters Actually Worth Opening” by Zoella that supports mental health and wellbeing. She’s on a mission to change the narratives that women have been told about success and happiness.

She left a six-figure salary at a hot Silicon Valley start-up because she realized she was trying to win a game she didn’t want to play. She has since dedicated her career to empowering women, teaching about emotional and spiritual wellness, and changing the rules of the game.

Currently, she’s working on finishing her first book and is searching for a literary agent.

Social profiles: Instagram: @heyelizabethsu Website: www.elizabethsu.com Introduce yourself!

Hi! I’m Elizabeth. I’m a writer, self-love evangelist, and founder of the popular newsletter Monday Vibes, named one of the “12 Newsletters Actually Worth Opening” by Zoella. I’m on a mission to change the narrative of what women have been told about success and happiness.

I left my Silicon Valley career after getting really f*cking tired of leaning in, pursued my master’s degree at Columbia University in Clinical Psychology with a concentration in Spirituality and Mind-Body practices, and now spend my time teaching about emotional and spiritual wellness.

I love the sunshine, hate small talk, and my husband and I recently left New York City to become digital nomads. When I’m not writing (or trying to smash the patriarchy), you can find me dancing in the kitchen, binge-watching Schitt’s Creek, or reading the latest from my (s) hero Brené Brown. The redwoods are my happy place.

What is Monday Vibes?

Monday Vibes is my newsletter! She’s like your Big Sis who gives the best ad-

vice about the hardest stuff. New issues come out every month and cover topics from spirituality and mental health to career and relationships. There’s advice, self-care tips, book recommendations, fave wellness products, a community Spotify playlist, Get To Know Your Community spotlights (featuring real stories from Monday Vibes subscribers), the works! Really, it’s a space for women to be themselves. I find there are a lot of spaces for women to be their best selves. But not a lot of spaces for women to just be themselves - their messy, imperfect, emotional, not-put-together selves. We laugh, we cry, we don’t take ourselves too seriously, and we lift each other up. It’s a lot of fun and I hope ya’ll subscribe and join the party!

You mention how your newsletter blends your three areas of expertise: psychology, wellness, and business.

How did you end up in these three areas?

Honestly, it all happened by accident!

Or I guess I should say, it’s been a non-linear journey. My undergraduate degree was in Quantitative Economics so I started my career in business, making my way to the start-up world in Silicon Valley.

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I got really burned out and suffered bigtime from anxiety, an eating disorder, PTSD, physical illness, workaholism, you name it, and dove headfirst into healing myself. I found a therapist, became a yoga teacher, got my life coaching certification, and fell in love with holistic wellness.

I then decided I would be the happiest girl in the world if I could make a career out of working in the personal growth space, so that’s when I went to get my master’s degree in Clinical Psychology from Columbia where I studied burnout and perfectionism in women.

Thus, when it came time to launch Monday Vibes - and in an effort to embrace my WHOLE self - I decided it would be a newsletter that would combine all my wisdom and experiences from over the years!

You offer a number of services, such as speaking engagements, consultations, workshops and courses. How did you start this work and where do you find inspiration for these programs?

Trial and error! I’m only half-joking. I think the biggest myth in entrepreneurship is that you have a “plan” and know exactly what you are doing at any given moment. I certainly didn’t, and still don’t.

What I do know is you need to listen, observe, and be willing to fall flat on your face. Especially in the first few years of being an entrepreneur, I tried a lot of different things. I failed and made mistakes. I pivoted and tried new things.

I’m a big believer in finding the right energetic exchange. So many of the business decisions I made were in response

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“If we are on the path to learning how to love ourselves unconditionally, how is that possible to do fully when you’ve received messages since you were young that you should hide parts of who you are? ” to finding a balance between giving and receiving. I like to think of the way I run my business as intuitive. Why would I keep doing something that no longer feels good just because I said I would?

Giving myself permission to change my mind was one of the greatest gifts.

You’ve worked in an array of fields and stepped into your own business while merging these expertises. How has your Asian identity influenced you, contributed, or been apparent through your career and in these different fields?

Oh gosh, probably more than I’m even aware of. I’m mixed - my dad is second-generation Chinese, my mom is white - so sometimes it’s hard to tell which side of my family influences what. But both sides of the family highly valued education and hard

work and instilled in me the idea that success is tied to your achievements. I worked my ass off trying to chase after this version of success and it came at a huge price. I’ve spent years trying to un-learn this version of success - what psychologists call a contingent sense of self-worth - and figuring out how to feel happy and worthy without needing to reach a particular goal.

I’m also certain that growing up in the Midwest where there were very few people who looked like me, and in a family that more or less pretended we were white, impacted my self-worth and how I view myself. If we are on the path to learning how to love ourselves unconditionally, how is that possible to do fully when you’ve received messages since you were young that you should hide parts of who you are? That there is something scary or shameful about being proud of your ethnicity? It’s a trip and I haven’t figured that one out yet.

How has this time of COVID-19 affected you and your work?

How have you been coping?

The start of the pandemic hit me hard. My husband and I were living in New York City at the time and I was overcome with anxiety and grief.

Simultaneously, I was experiencing a full-blown racial identity crisis and found myself in a very dark place. We ended up deciding to become digital nomads and since then, my mental health has greatly improved.

2020 taught me that humans really are resilient beings and are more adaptable than we think. I’ve been coping by getting extra sleep, voicing my needs, and being gentle with myself when I feel like watching four hours of Outlander instead of responding to a million emails.

What does self care mean to you?

How do you take care of yourself?

I love this question. To me, self care is anything that nurtures my spirit and allows me to reach a greater place of ease. This might look like a cozy bath.

But this also might look like breaking up with a friend. Self-care can take a lot of different forms but I think it’s ultimately whatever is in service to your needs at any particular moment.

Here are some rapid-fire questions: Your go-to coffee shop order?

(Spicy) Chai latte!

Favorite color?

Coral pink.

Any good films/tv shows you’re watching right now?

I’m finally watching Fresh Off the Boat and am loving all the 90’s references.

Ultimate comfort food?

Tong Yun (warm glutinous rice balls filled with black sesame paste) or PB & J. Is that the most Asian American answer or what?!

What has been the highlight of your day today?

I recently reached out for help - something that feels really uncomfortable to me - and I have to be honest, it feels so damn good to be supported. Such a sweet reminder that we are not meant to do life alone!

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In anticipation of new adventures for Miss Demure to go on, as provided by Overachiever’s readers, I decided she needed to have a concrete “on-model” look— here are some of the beginnings of character sheets and designs for her new look!

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Photo by Ajeet Mestry on Unsplash

Embodying hypocrisy at its finest, the people who complain about the presence of same-sex relationships in TV shows because they worry that this will “turn their kids gay” are the same people whose sexuality is forced down the throats of LGBTQIA+ youth by all aspects of media. We live in a cisgender heteronormative culture, one that prevents LGBTQIA+ youth from discovering their true selves earlier on, one that pumps out children with harmful compulsory heterosexuality and internalized homophobia. By not showing children same-sex relationships, transgender adults and youth, and other identities in the LGBTQIA+ community, our society has caused children to suppress and hate themselves because they don’t realize that it’s okay to not be cisgender and/or heterosexual, that they’re normal, valid, and loved as they are. On the streaming service Netflix, there are various shows under the title “Representation Matters.” Netflix is right: representation -- on the screen and in government—does matter. It matters because it shows people of all ages, ethnicities, sexual orientations, citizenship statuses, genders, and abilities that they matter too.

While the entertainment industry and Hollywood have been trying to promote diversity in their shows and films, it’s not enough to just have one token minority character or the same storyline for every single character with that identity. Giving a white lead a nerdy Indian American sidekick isn’t the progressive action directors seem to think it is. No identity is monolithic, so it’s not enough to just include characters with different skin colors.

Directors must also consider how that character is depicted and whether this depiction perpetuates stereotypes.

In order to provide viewers with the representation they deserve on the screen, the film industry should look towards Sex Education, One Day At A Time, and Grand Army, for example. Providing representation for gay teenagers of color, pansexual young women, bisexual adolescents with internalized homophobia, asexual youth, women

who have gotten abortions, sexual assault survivors, and all those with insecurities, Sex Education is a revolutionary show that has made inclusivity the main focus of its cast and their plot lines. Seeing someone similar to yourself in a popular TV show, whether that’s in terms of gender, experiences, sexual orientation, ethnicity, or multiple out of the aforementioned aspects, can not only make you feel normal but can also empower you to feel more confident and loving of yourself.

One Day At A Time—creating a family sitcom vibe—depicts a Cuban American family with a mother who acquired PTSD and depression after serving in the military, a grandmother who bravely immigrated to the USA from Cuba at a young age and is now working towards obtaining citizenship, a lesbian teenage daughter with a non-binary significant other, a son who deals with anti-Latinx racism from his classmates, and a family friend who’s recovering from substance abuse. Throughout this show, new characters are introduced, from the daughter’s best friend whose parents were undocumented and then deported, to the witty, badass black woman who also served in the military and is the mother’s rock. Intertwining various identities with each other, this show presents people as they are in the wild: multi-faceted and intersectional, providing representation for people who relate to the characters in more ways than one.

While Grand Army provides awareness of systemic, anti-black, and anti-Latinx racism in the education system, strong female characters who stand up for their rights and for respect while also acknowledging their own wrongdoings and shows how each character isn’t perfect, just like how real people aren’t, it’s earned a soft spot for me because of its representation of Indian American students. These students aren’t your stereotypical nerdy and quiet Indian American teenagers; instead, a teenage girl wrote and directed a feminist play and held a feminist art gallery at her parents’ restaurant while her brother,

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albeit a studious and driven young man with the goal of attending Harvard, came out as gay and stood up for himself when his parents dismissed him. As a feminist, LGBTQIA+ Indian American teenage girl myself, this representation made me feel seen.

Fictional representation isn’t the only kind of representation marginalized people need: they also need political representation. At the 2004 Democratic Convention, Barack Obama said that “the hope of a skinny kid with a funny name who believes that America has a place for him too” was why he was running for a senate seat. Years later, when Barack Obama was serving as the 44th President of the United States of America, his official White House photographer, Pete Souza, captured a shot of Jacob Philadelphia, a young black boy dressed to the nines in a suit and tie, with his hand on Barack Obama’s head as the president leaned over to make it easier for the boy to reach. Jacob had told the president that his friends had said the president and himself shared a hairstyle, so to prove to the boy that their hair was alike, Obama had let the boy touch his own. Not only is representation like this important so that the interests of marginalized people of that community are heard and protected, but it also matters because it tells all young people who see themselves in their political representatives that they can dream big too, that they belong and can be anything they want to be. Similarly, Kamala Harris, the first woman and Asian-American person to be the Vice-President Elect will do this for a whole generation of young girls and BIPOC children, inspiring them to dream big while advocating for them with her influential role in government. Finally, the first openly transgender woman to be elected to the Senate, Sarah McBride, will be a vital asset to Congress as she contradicts the prior administration’s discriminatory policies against transgender people and provides a voice for this underrepresented community.

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community being represented. People hate what they don’t understand and aren’t exposed to, so by depicting people of all identities in relatable, positive ways, both the government and media deter the formation of bigots through the power of empathy. When people are able to empathize with fictional characters or famous figures different from themselves, they are more likely to be accepting when someone in their own life is different from themselves. Let’s create a more accepting, inclusive world where everyone knows that they belong and are valued. Let’s demand the representation—in media and politics—that every person deserves.

Each issue we will be featuring music from Asian women and non-binary artists and bands. Here are some of our staff’s favorite picks for this issue! No flops— only bops— we’ve got a song for every mood.

We’ve started out this playlist with, of course, Olivia Rodrigo’s “drivers license.” Our intention isn’t to put you in the feels… It’s just become the Overachiever staff’s anthem for the month of January, so we were kind of obligated to include this. But don’t get into those feels yet, because we sprinkled some Rina Sawayama in here to pick you right back up with “XS”.

Not really sure what’s going on with the stocks during these last couple of days of January, but we felt that this was fitting to laugh in the face of capitalism. To finish off this playlist, we’re making up for the emotional rollercoaster that was “drivers license” with “Kill This Love” by BLACKPINK. Cancel out feeling like a sad b*tch with feeling like a bad b*tch, right?

drivers license - Olivia Rodrigo

Francis Forever - Mitski

Butterfly (Acoustic) - UMI

Morning Text - Trinity Rose

Lights On - H.E.R

Someone Else - Deb Never

Dance with me - Beabadoobee

lowkey - NIKI

Triggered - Jhene Aiko

Wonder - Adoy

Headaches - Raveena

At the Party - Hana Vu

XS - Rina Sawayama

Kill This Love- BLACKPINK

Scan for the spotify playlist!

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“Humble Paradise” by Yiling Yi Medium: 15 x 18” Pencil Illustration on Paper Artist’s Note: “Humble Paradise” is an illustration of my family observing baby chickens on our farm in rural China. It reflects contentment with the simplicity of life which I believe is something very relevant in the hustle of modern society. However, in the midst of pandemic life, contentment with simplicity has also become something we must remind ourselves to look for. Although hidden in plain sight all around us, sometimes it is unimaginably hard to stay conscious of it.

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“lose you to love me” by Cynthia Putri Iskandar Twitter: @saltylotus Medium: digital

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Virtual Revolution

By Shreya Rajappa @shreyarajappa A high school student living in sunny California, Shreya Rajappa enjoys writing creative non-fiction and impassioned Op-Ed articles. She credits her intersectional identity as a bisexual, feminist young woman with Indian and Sri Lankan parents for her desire to become involved in journalism to represent others who share aspects of her identity and to bring awareness to social issues involving marginalized communities. In her free time, she watches movies, takes pictures, tie-dyes clothes, and plays basketball.

A

picture of George Floyd, a black man with his neck pinned to the ground by the knee of a police officer in blue, interrupts your mindless scrolling on Instagram circa May 2020. Pointer finger hovering over the screen, you pause to read and learn that this man was suspected of paying with a counterfeit $20 bill at a Minneapolis store. Derek Chauvin, the police officer who answered the store’s call, knelt on Floyd’s neck for 8 minutes and 46 seconds, blocking his airways, killing him as he cried out, “I can’t breathe.” The $20 bill wasn’t even fake. You fill out the form for the change.org “Justice For George Floyd” petition and

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share the post to your own pant on apps. There’s also Instagram story, sending the rebuttal that social out a rallying cry to all of media provides an avenue your followers to sign the for connection with loved petition as well. Days later, ones. Allow me to present celebration erupts across an alternate viewpoint: soyour feed. The petition was cial media provides a catheard; the officers involved alyst for change-making have been fired and crimi- and a breeding ground for nally charged. You slouch self-confidence and social back into your chair, re- consciousness. lieved. But, as you relax, you know that the real work Don’t believe me? Just is far from over; in fact, it check out one of the 60 hasn’t even been started accounts that pop up on yet. A spark of courage, ac- Instagram when you type tion, advocacy catches fire “activism” into the search within you. bar. Sure, the ones created

by Jacob Castaldi and TanSocial media is powerful ner Sweitzer, businessmen in more ways than one. Of who are more interested in course, there’s the well- raising their follower count known story of cyberbul- than enacting real change, lying, time-wasting, and are well-known (e.g., insecurity that runs ram@feminist, @chnge, and

@march), but the accounts that deserve a follow are the ones created by teenagers. Julia, a 17-year-old Asian-American girl from California, runs the account @activismgirl, which not only contains posts calling out systemic racism, the patriarchy, homophobia, transphobia, xenophobia, and ableism but also shares national and global news updates, petitions, and fundraisers for political campaigns and struggling marginalized individuals. Recently, she used her platform to sell stickers with a peach design and “flip the senate” logo to raise money for Raphael Warnock and Jon Ossof, the democratic candidates in the Georgia senate runoffs. With 64.2 thousand followers, she’s educating many around the globe, people she wouldn’t have been able to inspire without social media’s expansive scope.

Another notable account started by young people is @letterstomygeneration that, in their words, is “founded by GenZ for the Generations.” With a legislative campaign to get mental health education in schools, affordable therapy, and more comprehensive mental health services in Colorado, and by posting letters written by teenag-

ers who want to share their mental health journeys, the account seeks to end the stigma surrounding mental health and show other teenagers that they’re not alone.

A final note to make about the positive influence of social media on our society is that it has fostered an update of the “golden rule”: treat others how they want to be treated and with the respect all huGoing hand in hand mans deserve. People on with activism accounts to social media have become create an uplifting atmo- more conscious in the past sphere on social media, few months of what other posts about body positivity people have to deal with on and women empowerment and offline, growing empaare plentiful on people’s thy for those with different feeds, and for you pages. experiences. As a result, These videos show women accessibility has become posing in a way to look like a staple of posts on both the “ideal body type” and Instagram and TikTok. Capthen relaxing their bodies tions on videos and image to show that their bellies descriptions in both the are not actually flat and post’s caption and alt text that they have hip dips and are some ways by which stretch marks in order to people on social media are “normalize normal bodies.” thinking of those with visuSimilarly, there are a pleth- al impairments and hearing ora of videos telling view- loss. Additionally, cisgeners that they’re beautiful der people have helped as they are. A recent TikTok normalize putting one’s trend emphasizes solidar- pronouns in social media ity among women through bios, which not only lures girls posting videos of away transphobes from themselves dancing to the their innocent targets but song “Space Girl,” celebrat- also demonstrates how soing women of all body types, cial media has made peoethnicities, personalities, ple more considerate of and styles. Even though others. A world where peothe people posting these ple respect each other, love messages are all strangers, themselves, and advocate they have formed connec- for justice is attainable; the tions through shared inse- template for it is right there curities and support each on your phone. other in conquering their demons.

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“a warm reminder” and “What’s Inside” by Maggie Teng Medium: mixed media and graphite/watercolor/acrylic on sketchbook paper

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FEMALE

Founder of Happy Gut Happy Life. She empowers health conscious women of culture heal their gut issues through bridging traditional healing nutrition and techniques into their modern day lifestyles.

Struggling since childhood with undiagnosed digestive issues,(like constipation, gastritis and severe IBS triggering allergies, brain fog and OCD) Dr. Sara found her purpose through her pain and has spent the last 15 years learning, implementing and teaching others how to naturally address these issues.

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When she’s not working, Dr. Sara loves spending time with her family enjoying the Hawaiian beaches and mountain trails, along with creating traditionally healing and locally inspired dishes for them to enjoy.

their marginal-

As a child of the dias in between worlds, s and we are here. Res

My art is my express relate to the world b multiple disciplines l symbiosis the more am stepping in. My a those that are.

Socials: @eluaiyana

E GAZE To create art as a Kurdish woman is a revolution in itself.

This is a gentle reminder that today still Kurdish people end up in jail, get killed and undergo ethnic cleansing for centuries , are not allowed to speak their own language or practice their dances without risking lives. Women being the most ized in this patriarchal system.

A high school student living in sunny California, Shreya Rajappa enjoys writing creative non-fiction and impassioned Op-Ed articles. She credits her intersectional identity as a bisexual, feminist young woman with Indian and Sri Lankan parents for her desire to become involved in journalism to represent others who share aspects of her identity and to bring awareness to social issues involving marginalized communities. In her free time, she watches movies, takes pictures, writes stories and songs, and plays basketball.

spora , I did grow up with a lot of privileges , but lost so here’s my voice to show you all we women rise silient, beautiful and strong.

sion and gateway of connection. My art is how I but also how I relate to myself , which translates into like tattooing and visual art. The deeper I enter this I recognize that it is my ancestors footsteps that I art is here to honor those that came before us and

aart

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“untitled” by Alexandra Durrschnabel Medium: oil paint on canvas

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Ever since I was six, I have gone to after-school classes - not tutoring for subjects that I was bad at, but learning a few grades higher in order to keep a pristine report card. I’ve been staying up until midnight almost every school day since the eighth grade. I started drinking at least two cups of coffee a day when high school began.

I have always been told that was normal.

From my mom, who casually describes her friend’s son staying up until 11:00 p.m. and waking up at five in the morning. From my Chinese friends, who laugh and brush it off as a universal experience and a coming of age that just happened to strip away our childhoods. Not quite from non-Asian teachers, peers, and counselors, but it’s evident in how they look almost shocked when any Asian student gets what would usually be considered a fair grade, or how they dismiss every mental health complaint an Asian student brings to them with “just don’t overwork yourself” or “tell your parents to put less pressure on you”.

It hurts when social issues become a gimmick for relatability. “Relatable” posts about parents beating you if you don’t get all A+’s are as ubiquitous as posts about

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not wearing shoes inside the house. Too often, Tiktok stars and comedians that rise to fame make a joke out of their parents’ anger and redirect it to them being Asian. Even in serious environments, mental wellness is rarely discussed - they are shunned in favor of fawning over the new movie or show with an Asian lead, or a sob story of wanting Caesar salad for lunch but getting kimchi instead.

Worst of all, people do not realize that while certain issues are related to the experience of growing up Asian, they don’t have to be.

Objectively speaking, dismissing issues of mental health hurts people. Receiving the response of “lol me too” after ranting about how meaningless life is might seem nice at first, but will hurt people. Being told that a family’s high expectations are inherent to the experience of an Asian person, just as stress is increasing due to said expectations, will hurt people.

It’s important that we, in our communities, acknowledge certain things as part of the Asian experience, but not in the same way that we celebrate Lunar New Year or learn our parents’ native language. We need to see them as problems, plain and simple - compromising your wellbeing for status and achievement is a problem. Therapy and discussions around mental health being seen as taboo is a problem.

Specifically, they are problems that are influenced by shared experiences of those in the Asian diaspora. For example, the pressure many young Asian people face to excel at school is a cultural phenomenon, one that came from their parents’ pursuit of a “better education” in the West. Extracurricular institutions prey on parents who want their children to have high-level achievements. Elders must navigate a world that doesn’t care for so-called “backwards Oriental traditions”, and adults handle a family’s survival knowing a language mishap could cost them more than just an apology. Thus, the stress that many older Asians feel does manifest itself in frustration that can affect interpersonal relationships. Many therapists and counselors do not work well with people of color, due to years of medical racism in psychology, language barriers, and a lack of understanding of their experiences. Neurodivergent Asians suffer particularly - the stigma surrounding mental “illness” is unbearable for those with ADHD, Autism, OCD, and bipolar disorder, and more conditions that the average person in many parts of Asia are unaware of, and labeled as “insanity.”

Discussions are most productive when they start within our community - we understand our struggles as shared circumstances with similar causes, rather than believe bigoted opinions that say all Asians are innately abusive, scheming, or book-smart. Encouragement from people in similar circumstances is crucial. If I saw another Asian girl succeed in convincing her parents that mental health is important, that she must drop some courses and take a break - and that they listened - I would be much more willing to ask for the same from my parents. Many

people in communities that have been wronged by the West tend to dismiss ideas if they are associated with the West. When mental health becomes more accessible as a concept, more people - including older people - can see their personal problems as legitimate. Furthermore, our desire to relate to things often trumps how harmful those things can be - the vague idea of an Asian American identity can only be connected to so much, given that the Asian diaspora is very diverse.

Without paying attention to the gravity of stress, what are currently viewed as the most pressing issues for Asian people will not change. This is not to say that issues like representation of Asians in the media, or Asian children being teased for bullying are not important, but their prevalence translates to a dismissal of other subjects. A vicious cycle exists where the more a subject is spoken of, the less others gain any attention; this is how social media and journalism, two important modes of communication, capitalize on popularity.

Therefore, what is necessary is an active shift in our thinking and our goals.

The intersection of mental health and one’s experiences as an Asian person is something we as a community must approach - not as another lighthearted “relatable” experience to create a shallow sense of unity. How we define the Asian experience should be less complicit in the issues that hurt individuals, and be inclusive of those who are hurt most by the silence.

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Patine Jewelry creates Upcycled Ceramic and Polymer Clay Jewelry Collections all handcrafted by Sally!

Each item is a o n e - o f- a- k i n d piece of jewelry that is cut, shaped & sanded by hand. Find them on Etsy and FB/IG: @patinejewelry 81 | Overachiever Magazine

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LOSING THE MORAL COMPASS IN WORKPLACE (A Global look at possible those at risk and how to fix this issue)

By Ruchi Acharya

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In this fast-paced work environment of the 21st century, there is a toxic work culture spreading at an alarming rate. According to the recent report

by Ethics & Compliance Initiative (ECI), the results show that employees working in organizations with four to seven significant changes in 12 months were two times as likely to say they observed misconduct than employees working in an organization without any significant changes.

Until more is done to sustain high-quality ethics in the work environment more and more cases of mis-conductance will be reported.

At the workplace the firms need to understand to prioritise compassionate behavior over pressurizing the work colleagues to obtain results. People need to be kind and considerate rather than showing negative competitiveness. In the race of climbing the success ladder people are forgetting about the basic essence of life that is human respect. It is very important to show respect towards another human being and try to be humble in nature. But the million-dollar question is, ‘Who is responsible for toxic work culture? Is its behavioral problem or is it due to the working system?’

According to the Deccan Chronicle newspaper article “Horrible bosses, toxic work culture exposed online”, there are some examples of horrible bosses mentioned by Nivi Shrivastava in her research that will move you off your feet (Shrivastava, 2020).

Story 1: Shivani Mehta, a senior brand consultant, recalls her awful work experience at her last job. “In my last job at a PR agency, I faced a very disturbing work culture. My boss was a complete bully who was always shouting at us. He created unnecessary work pressure and overloaded us with work. I was asked to attend events at odd hours and my payments were delayed if I argued about anything. It was a small firm and there was no one to report to, so I quit after a few months.”

Saad Mughal, a team leader at a social media and content marketing firm, shares that a particular ex-colleague created problems among the team to get “attention”.

Story 2: A senior fashion editor, who requested

anonymity, talks about the common sight in many offices of women not supporting other women. According to her, the job is less dependent on talent and more on how much you can kiss ass.

“To top it all, I was a single mom. So when I had to go for my son’s parent-teachers’ meeting or report card day I was told that a day’s salary would be cut. When I was a feeding mom, I never got any help from my boss who would often ridicule me and say that companies should not hire mothers.”

The senior editor laments about how offices don’t have crèche or flexible, work-fromhome options. “And, sadly you were never considered for a promotion if you were family-oriented,” she adds.

Story 3: Anushka Sharma, who currently works in an IT firm, shares with us her experiences when she worked in a hospitality chain.

“I had to go through seriously unacceptable work conditions. Right from ugly politics of top management to no work-life balance, long unpaid hours, and an unsupportive boss — I went through a tough time and struggled with mental and physical health issues. I was stressed, depressed, and suffered from hormonal imbalance. I quit the job to save my sanity.”

Emtrain analyzed over 2.5 million data points collected from 40,000 employees at 125 companies in 2019 to reveal the behaviors that contribute to healthy – and unhealthy – workplaces. More than 80% of workers say they would not report harassment if they saw it, and 41% say even if they did report harassment, their managers wouldn’t take them seriously. As per the 2020 Workplace Culture Report, the research on responses obtained from a database narrates that around 40,000 employees in more than 125 companies traces workplace conflict reverting to six main key indicators: three people indicators (unconscious bias, social intelligence, and pre-existing mind-sets)

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and three organizational indicators (in-groups and out-groups, power dynamics, and norms and practices) (Emtrain,2020).

Success measures to fix the toxic work culture Step 1: Leaders must explore their journey to self-discovery and start taking responsibilities for their mis-conductance towards their team members in the firm. A manager or a leader is equally responsible for creating toxic working as an abuser by turning a blind eye on the issue and knowingly allowing bad behavior to exist and be acceptable in the team. This is the first and foremost approach to eradicate the virulent culture at the workplaces.

Step 2: Communication is a key to solve all the problems. By having the conversation out in the open and being transparent to each other is highly recommendable to sustain a healthy work lifestyle.

If by conducting meetings and discussing each other’s viewpoints in the office can solve the complex operational or financial problems, then why not let’s try to discuss internal conflicts. To have a transparent discussion can lead to attain a non-biased or unfavorable working environment in the industry. So, let’s talk.

Step 3: By observing and becauses of internal conflicts one problem that led to this unourselves who are the people and undermine their work colare being suppressed for having Is someone getting bullied at

coming familiar with root can learn a lot about the real likely situation. We need to ask that dominate the workplace leagues? Are there people who a different opinion than others? the workplace?

Step 4: After settling on the everyone’s on board, it is very tion. One needs to understand employees and work accordrestore unity.

same page or rather say, when important to conduct a reflecthe feedback received by the ingly to boost morale and to

Step 5: Lastly, in order to maintain a healthy work environment and to prevent future violations of work ethics, there is an urgency to address the structural problem that led to this situation in the first place. Strict rules and regulations against deterring behavior at the workplace must be introduced and serious actions must be taken against the abusers.

REFERENCES Shrivastava, N., 2020. Horrible bosses, toxic work culture exposed online. Deccan Chronicles, [online] p.1. Available at: <https://www.deccanchronicle.com/lifestyle/culture-and-society/210720/horrible-bosses-toxic-work-culture-exposed-online.html> Emtrain, 2020. Emtrain Workplace Culture Report 2020 Reveals Key Causes of Toxic Workplace Culture, Little Progress Has Been Made Despite MeToo Movement. [online] San Francisco: prnewswire. com. Available at: <https://www.prnewswire.com/news-releases/emtrain-workplace-culture-report-2020-reveals-key-causes-of-toxic-workplace-culture-little-progress-has-been-made-despite-metoo-movement-301020369.html> [Accessed 29 January 2021].

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Ulam: Main Dish Documentary A. Mana Nava The documentary Ulam: Main Dish opens with clips of a Filipino family-style buffet.

Chef and restaurateur Nicole Ponseca (owner of Jeepney) describes the ceremony as “whole feasts served on banana leaves. No plates. No Utensils. No problem.” The sight is hauntingly familiar: at piles of rice (of course), slow-cooked meats, pancit, fried fish, bok choy, and platanos. The colors of the dishes pop against the vibrant green banana leaves.

This setting’s so familiar, so comforting but I couldn’t name it until Ponseca says, “kamayan.”

Most of my familial memories involve food.

Every Saturday, we’d go to my Aunt and Uncle’s for dinner, which always ended with us kids begging for a sleepover. We knew the mornings promised corned beef hash and eggs over rice. I can recall my grandparents dragging my brother and I to their Lingayen Club events where there’d be KFC, lechon, different types of pancit, dinuguan, and puto de ube with a sprinkling of cheese. I make garlic rice and adobo for my father whenever he misses his parents. I know Filipino food.

I’ve suspected that my prevailing relationship with food was cultural, but I didn’t have the language to articulate my cultural traditions. This is because I’m a third-generation Filipino American and I wasn’t allowed to

learn Pangasinan, Tagalog, or Spanish from any of my immigrant family members for fear of an accent and racial prejudice. As a group, my elders decided my generation would be as American as possible. This is a tale as old as time, and while well-meaning it’s well-established that this method of assimilation does more harm than good.

What is wild about this documentary is that it taught me that I still have so much to learn about my own culture. Being a part of a diasporic community means nuggets of knowledge are lost between generations. For example, all my life, I thought I was eating noodles.

Often, my paternal grandmother would make pancit using glass noodles. Well, it turns out glass noodles are just really long mung bean sprouts. Chef and restaurant owner Alvin Cailan (of Eggslut, Am Boy, Paperplanes, and Unit 120) casually mentions this factoid in an NYC market during the documentary. This comment made in passing rocked my world.

Perhaps this revelation is something first/ second-gen kids (or for those who carefully read the food packaging) would roll their eyes at, but I was dumbstruck. My first instinct was to text my fellow mixed-Filipina college roommate who was equally stunned. Why didn’t our families just tell us? Did they think

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our American palates would be grossed out?

How could that be possible when we’ve been eating these dishes all our lives?

Over dinner, shortly after the capitol insurrection, I asked both of my parents to list the historical events they witnessed over their lifetime. My dad was born into a military family, so he got to see a good chunk of the United States. In the middle of describing growing up in segregated Maryland and joining a gang in our Bay Area suburb to survive farmtown white supremacy, my father fondly remembered eating at a Filipino-owned Chinese restaurant in Ketchikan, Alaska. It was easy to picture younger versions of my family gathered around a lazy susan full of American Chinese lemon chicken, broccoli beef, roasted duck, pancit, and sinigang.

I reminded him of this anecdote when the documentary described a Filipino-owned Chinese restaurant, Dragonfly. According to Ponseca, the restaurant served classic American Chinese food, but if you squinted, you’d be able to see a small section of Filipino dishes.

This is a pattern. Classically trained Filipino American chefs like Andre Guerro (of Oinkster, Maximiliano, & the Little Bear), Charles Olalia (of Ricebar), or the Valencia brothers (of Lasa) worked in non-Filipino restaurants for years. They cooked Italian pasta and French stewed meats, but Filipino food? According to restaurateurs and investors: not possible.

So, what’s the deal? Why are we only Filipino in secret? Why aren’t there as many Filipino restaurants as manga/anime-themed Dim Sum fusion spots?

Filipino food is hard to define. There are some common elements: vinegar, sour, fermentation, and stewed meats. These cooking techniques stem from necessity because of

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the climate’s tropical weather. One of the chefs and restaurateurs, Amy Besa (of Purple Yam), dedicates her life to honoring, exploring, and celebrating the flavors of her home country. She describes her travels all over the Philippines, tasting countless dishes. What she learned is that there are 3 dishes that can be found in almost any Filipino community: adobo, sinigang, and kinilaw.

Everything else is subject to change depending on where you are from in the Philippines and what ingredients are accessible to you. It’s the most beautiful and difficult part of being Filipino.

Beyond that, it is difficult to pinpoint our cuisine. We are a colonized people whose previously Chinese Malaysian influenced cuisine has been altered by our most recent occupations. The Spanish introduced dishes like leche flan.,then eventually, Americans made us dependent on processed packages for flavor.

Amy Besa and Romy Dorotan (of Purple Yam) were repeatedly “advised not to do Filipino food. No one is going to come if you say Filipino.” Others, like Ponseca, were told directly that “white people aren’t interested” and “Filipinos won’t pay.”

Why can’t we support each other? Why can’t we invest in each other?

The documentary posits a theory for this: crab mentality. The collective of chefs featured in the documentary defines crab mentality as hiding or being shameful of one’s success. Each chef describes their own experience of Lolas describing their food as “bland” or “not authentic” because this is not how they cook at home. Like Johneric Concordia (of The Park’s Finest) said, “Filipino food equals memories.” So, when the chef doesn’t put chili flakes in the adobo or if the garlic rice is too moist, we become hy-

percritical of the dish when it doesn’t meet our expectations. Those suffering from crab mentality drag down restaurants with poor reviews because they have a rigid idea of how Filipino food should taste. They believe it should taste like home.

tary is made by a Filipino American production company, by a Filipina director/ writer/producer, and with a Filipino executive producer to uplift Filipino chefs and restaurateurs. If we don’t lift each other up no one else will.

Psychologist Kevin L. Nadal, Ph.D., dives deeper into the phenomenon by stating this is “the desire to outdo, outshine, or surpass another (often of one’s same ethnic group) at the other’s expense.” This mentality encourages one to bring others down in an attempt for individual authority and success. While this seems contradictory in a collectivist culture, this constant need to exert authority and police a culture prevents any Filipino American from succeeding.

We must follow Cailan’s lead and make space for us. Cailan works with congressmen to try and get Filipino chefs VISAs so they can work in the United States. He also tries to legitimize all chefs and their visions through Unit 120, a creative collective that supports, trains, and pairs restaurateurs and chefs. The truth is we are all better working together than perpetuating an us-versus-them narrative.

However, the truth is there is no monolithic Filipino identity or culture, especially in the Philippines. There are the Pangasinan, Visayan, Tagalog, Ilocano, Igorot, and so many other ethnic and cultural groups that exist within the Filipino experience. As a Filipino American community, we need to get over the idea that we have the right to police what being Filipino means. No single person can define a country containing thousands of islands, with hundreds of dialects, containing millions of people with so many different historical/ethnic backgrounds whose skin color exists on the entire color spectrum. Despite being interviewed at different times, each of the chefs echo this statement in the documentary.

We, Filipino Americans, will finally be able to thrive when we can finally acknowledge we are a diverse, collective community. It is of the utmost importance that we learn to celebrate, explore, and appreciate our differences.

It’s time to get over the crab mentality. Not only is it petty, but it’s also counterproductive. Because guess what? This documen-

What is clear is that a sense of bayanihan (community) is a shared trait of Filipino culture regardless of any of the variables in our identities. Our community is so diverse, but we still have a shared Filipino identity. We have a word for this: kapwa.

While the literal definition of isn’t tied to Filipino identity and can be broadly used, as a Filipnx American, I use kapwa to describe something undeniably and sometimes unexplainably Filipino. It is kapwa that caused me to text, call, and DM my Filipino friends when I heard about Ulam: Main Dish from the podcast This Filipino American Life when the director Alexandra Cuedero was a featured guest. Within my bayanihan we shared memories of splitting fluffy mamom cakes, sneaking bites of meat while deshelling crab, or calling something Filipino food because there was a fried egg on top. As a community, we need to take a page out of Ulam’s book and come together to celebrate the rich complexities and Filipino culture, otherwise, we risk forgetting how to cook pancit palabok and stuck with spaghetti (without the banana ketchup).

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“Los Animales is a series of illustrations inspired by the people who work, study, play and live in the diverse city of Sydney. The animal figures are symbolisms of the virtues that help us survive the daily grind. These virtues are courage, individuality, creativity, wisdom, resilience, boldness, compassion, and love.

Inside each and every person, there is a leader, rebel, traveler, nurturer, hustler, dreamer, artist and lover. I combine the animal and human form to inspire empathy and respect for each other and for all creatures big and small.”

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LOS ANIMALES (SERIES) by Aphrodite Delaguiado Find her at: instagram.com/illographo & aphro.com.au Medium: Digital Art

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