ParentMap May 2022 Issue

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May Play List May is a good month to celebrate dramas, llamas and … mamas!

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Standout Graphic Novels for Kids Diverse graphic novels for your family’s summer reading list

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PNW INSIDE + OUT

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ParentEd Talk How to Stop Fighting and Start Winning Together in Parenting and Marriage May 17 P. 30

Pathways to Parenthood Three local families share their adoption stories 8/


The real guardians of a state are the teachers. — The Jerusalem Talmud

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C ONTENTS

May

2022

PARENTMAP.COM In Every Issue Dear Reader Play List

Local Resources Camps + Activities Schools + Preschools

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Parenting

Feature

WELLNESS

Pathways to Parenthood 8 Three local families share their adoption stories

Waiting for the Other Vaccine 6 to Drop What the authorization delay for kids younger than 5 means EDUCATION

Mad Science Fun and easy experiments to boost STEM learning VOICES

A Mother’s Courage Parenting in the face of insecurity so elemental as survival

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Family Fun OUT + ABOUT

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May Play List 18 May is a good month to celebrate dramas, llamas and … mamas!

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FAMILY MEDIA

Standout Graphic Novels for Kids 25 Diverse graphic novels for your family’s summer reading list AGES + STAGES

Parent Ed 2.0 29 Access to parenting support has gotten easier during the pandemic

“My wellspring source, which is living in real gratitude – not the kind stitched onto pillows or posted as memes on social media – is gritty and p. 14 messy.”

An English teacher shares her students’ favorite graphic novel titles featuring multicultural, diverse characters and themes.

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PNW INSIDE + OUT

Family

Adventure 5 Northwest Lakes for Your Epic Summer Vacation

N T M A P. C O M / A D V S U M M E R 2022 | PA R E

ENTURE

Life on the Edge: Incredible Lighthouse Stays Local Destinations to Wow Your Hard-to-Impress Kid Overnight Sensations: Rentals One-of-a-Kind Nearby Vacation Decadent Local Treats You’ll Love ‘Dough’ Much 9 Adventures That Will Float Your Boat

Summer Family Adventure Guide inside!

Enter the Power of Play Giveaway p. 49

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DE AR R E ADER

Fifties Flashback Forward: The Art of ‘Childcraft’ My husband Matt comes from a large bookish family, and after his dear mother passed away, he brought home a collection of books dating from his childhood. Among this tome treasury is a complete 15volume set of the 1954 edition of the “Childcraft” series. Now, for those of you who haven’t heard of “Childcraft,” it is essentially a “how and why” encyclopedia set for families that has been reinvented and reissued by World Book multiple times since its first publication in the 1930s to reflect our ever-changing world — and the faceted experience of parenting. Presented in thematic, fastidiously indexed volumes, “Childcraft” was created to both engage children in fun learning (the child-directed content is beautifully illustrated and storybook-like), and to inspire parents to be “your child’s first and most influential teacher … understanding, resourceful and stimulating.” I find this series astonishing for many reasons, not the least of which is the realization that the experience of rearing young children, then and now, is not as different as we might imagine. In wise, reassuring and practical essays on every child development topic under the sun, the expert contributors of “Childcraft” presumed and addressed a readership of moms and dads who embraced parenting as a high calling. Post-WWII American families at that time were obviously not strangers to the type of anxiety-inducing existential pangs that today’s families grapple with; and interestingly, it was also an era when the groundswell of study into child life and development first surged. Correspondingly, deep humanity and keen insight permeate “Childcraft.” So, whatever notions I held about 1950s parenting mores — chiefly that children must be “seen not heard” — were refuted the moment I cracked the cover of volume 15, which outlines in one section a “Pledge to Children,” which vows, in part: • From your earliest infancy we give you our love, so that you may grow with trust in yourself and others. • We will recognize your worth as a person and we will help you to strengthen your sense of belonging. • We will respect your right to be yourself and at the same time help you to understand the rights of others. … • We will illustrate by precept and example the value of integrity and the importance of moral courage. … • We will work to rid ourselves of prejudice and discrimination, so that together we may achieve a truly democratic society. … • We will provide you with rewarding educational opportunities, so that you may develop your talents and contribute to a better world. … I am heartened by the timeless and universal significance of this pledge, which reads to me like a pretty inspiring and commonsense job description.

MAY 2022, VOL. 19, NO. 5

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Jude, living with sickle cell disease

Some said sickle cell disease would steal Jude’s joy. Tell that to this glowing girl. TREATING THE MOST KIDS WITH SICKLE CELL DISEASE IN THE PACIFIC NORTHWEST Jude’s pain started at just four days old. Her family was scared and heartbroken, so they went looking for answers—and found Seattle Children’s, together with the Odessa Brown Children’s Clinic. They moved from Nebraska to Seattle for expert pediatric care, and today, Jude is growing into who she wants to be. Find your hope at SeattleChildrens.org/sicklecell

Hope. Care. Cure.™

Alix Dassler, Jude’s Nurse Practitioner, Odessa Brown Children’s Clinic


Wellness Waiting for the Other Vaccine to Drop What the FDA’s decision to delay vaccine authorization for kids younger than 5 means — and what parents can do in the meantime By Kellie Schmitt Now that the indoor mask requirement in Washington state has been lifted, navigating the new public health landscape can be concerning for parents of children still too young to be vaccinated, says Elias Kass, N.D., a Seattle-based naturopathic doctor specializing in pediatric primary care. Although Pfizer and BioNTech as well as Moderna are working to finalize COVID-19 vaccine trials for this younger group, there is still no vaccine authorized for children younger than 5, a segment of the population representing more than 460,000 Washington children. While the risk of hospitalization and death from the virus is much lower for children, there are still concerns about the long-term effects of the virus, even for those with a mild case, Kass notes. “To parents of young kids, I would say, ‘You’re not crazy or overprotective for wanting to shield your child from infection,’” says Kass. “It’s totally reasonable that families may have opted to keep these kids sheltered as the rest of the world opened up.” While we wait, we know the drill In the absence of a vaccine for our youngest kids, we can protect them by doubling down on the safeguarding methods we’ve all become accustomed to following during the pandemic. Washington state Secretary of Health Umair Shah, M.D., MPH, advises, “While we don’t know if or when the FDA will authorize a COVID-19 vaccine for children younger than 5, we recommend family members and caregivers get vaccinated and boosted if they have children in this age group. We also encourage parents and caregivers to 6 / PA R E N T M A P. C O M

use other prevention tools if vaccination is not an option, such as wearing a mask in crowded settings, washing little hands frequently, and making sure if anyone is sick that they stay home and get tested for COVID-19.” A roller coaster of hope, disappointment The U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) authorized the Pfizer-BioNTech vaccine for children ages 5–11 in late October 2021. Many parents were hopeful that authorization for the vaccine for children younger than 5 would quickly follow. But in February, when it postponed a decision on authorizing the Pfizer-BioNTech vaccine for infants and young children, the FDA announced that it wanted more data about a third dose. Initially, the companies had tested a twodose version of the vaccine for infants and young children. But the smaller size of those doses — 3 micrograms — didn’t trigger a robust immune response. (In comparison, children ages 5–11 receive 10 micrograms per dose; adults receive 30 micrograms per dose.) Instead of starting from scratch with a higher dose, the company kept the same children enrolled in the trial and added a third dose. Data from the three-dose trial are expected to be released sometime this spring. In the meantime, Moderna — which currently only has an approved vaccine for adults — is also seeking authorization for a two-dose vaccine series for children ages 6 months–6 years. What level of effectiveness is expected for a pediatric vaccine? While the delay may be confusing, experts say it’s a sign that the FDA is seeking a high-

ly effective vaccine for this youngest age group as well as carefully scrutinizing safety outcomes based on the latest available data gathered during the omicron surge. “If it gets authorized, it will be because it works,” assures Kass. Safety is the paramount consideration While COVID-19-related deaths among the 6 months–4 years age group represent a minuscule percentage of the country’s overall death tally, 464 young children and infants have died (as of April 17), according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). A total of 3,578 children in this age group have been hospitalized nationwide due to the coronavirus since March 2020 (data as of April 9). About two-thirds of children hospitalized with COVID-19 had an underlying condition, such as obesity, according to a CDC report that examined cases at six hospitals last summer. Vaccine authorization for this age group would be “exceptionally reassuring” for young patients with preexisting health conditions such as congenital heart disease, says Agustin Rubio, M.D., a pediatric cardiologist at Seattle Children’s Hospital. Along with the elderly and adults with preexisting conditions, these high-risk children can also face the “devastating effects” of COVID-19, he says. “Having that ability to provide an additional source of protection for our high-risk patients with heart disease would be amazing,” says Rubio. Over the past two years, providers at Seattle Children’s Hospital have seen a wide spectrum of COVID-19 cases. While many young patients have mild, cold-like symp-


toms, there have been some children admitted into the critical care unit, requiring additional oxygen to breathe. Overall, vaccinated individuals tend to recover faster and are also less likely to infect other people, he notes. Vaccination offers children the best chance at recovery if they become infected, and that extra protection can also help ease the family back into more social interactions, which are key for children’s overall development and well-being. “I think we need to provide [children] that freedom — freedom that can only come after securing their health,” says Rubio. A pandemic childhood In his primary care practice, Kass sees young patients who have only experienced life in social isolation during the pandemic. That isolation has come during what can already be a vulnerable time for young families. Kass used to recommend that new parents join support groups, attend baby music classes, get coffee with other parents and head to the playgrounds. During the height of the pandemic, those community-building activities were largely suspended. Even now that communities have opened again, many families with children too young to mask still avoid such communal interactions.

“GET THE SHOT!” Emerson, Age 6

When Kass discusses vaccination with parents, he explains the broader landscape: This is a virus that’s incredibly contagious — and it mutates. “It’s not a choice between the vaccine and nothing,” says Kass. “It’s a choice between the vaccine and the disease. Whatever head start our immune system can get is always going to be advantageous.”

Kellie Schmitt is an award-winning health and science writer.

Sponsored by

SCHEDULE YOUR CHILD’S VACCINATION TODAY. VaccinateWA.org

The Department of Health works to protect and improve the health of all people in Washington state by leading changes in policies, systems and environments to prevent illness and injury; promoting healthy families and communities; encouraging healthy lifestyles; and focusing on places where people live, learn, work, recreate, seek health care and worship.

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FE ATUR E

Pathways to Parenthood Three local families share their adoption stories By Gemma Alexander

Building a family is a deeply personal journey, no matter how you go about doing it. Adoption still hasn’t quite shaken off the aura of mystery and shame that cloaked it from the Victorian era into the 21st century. Despite the assumptions and misconceptions that a lot of people have, there are almost as many ways to build a family through adoption as there are families. Here, three local families share the story of their pathway to adoption.

Private adoption agency

After struggling with infertility, Erin Dickerson Glover and her husband, Gerald, turned to adoption. They considered international adoption, but that option was not a possibility during the pandemic. Instead, they chose private adoption through a full-service, faith-based agency that their friends had used successfully.

After nearly a year of waiting and a couple

else’s baby. She was very mature in this

of near matches, they suddenly received five possible situations. They pursued each one until everything fell into place with an 11-month-old baby in South Carolina. The couple traveled to meet the birth family, and in October 2021, exactly one year after submitting their application, they brought their daughter, London, home.

mindset of hers to be brave enough to make this choice for London.

The family is now preparing to start the process of adopting a sibling for London and plans to use the same agency again. What surprised you about the adoption process? It was important to us that at least one birth parent shared our African American heritage. Surprisingly, that was harder than I thought it was going to be. A lot of verbiage around adoption in this country has a lot to do with babies of color, and that was not the picture we were experiencing. How do you navigate open adoption? I truly didn’t understand the magnitude of importance of open adoption until I read “Adoption Joys” [by Doris Howe] as part of my research. I realized it isn’t healthy for anyone to remove the history of a person’s identity. I’m a huge advocate of open adoption now for anyone who has that option. She [London’s biological mother] was 20 years old with an unexpected pregnancy during a pandemic. She told me that she always felt like she was carrying someone

Erin and Gerald with daughter London

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We agreed to monthly texts and photos and no direct contact for a year to let London bond with us uninterrupted. But the story just grows, and now London’s bio mother calls me her second mama — because I am old enough to be her mother. Now, we text whenever we want to. We FaceTimed for her birthday, and she and London had a great conversation with no tears. My mom and the biological grandmother have even talked. It’s been the most amazing experience. There’s just a sense of additional family. We’ve united two families forever. What would you do differently next time? I will have a different mindset about the time line and feel more hopeful the second time. I know it will happen, but I won’t have a time line. What advice do you have for prospective adoptive parents? It was helpful for us to meet with a counselor from our agency to help form an idea about what adoptive parenting would look like for our family. Be honest with yourself and your spouse about what you’re willing to say yes to in regards to a possible adoptee and about why you are choosing adoption. Find others in the adoption community so you won’t feel so alone. And read. There


are so many great books and resources about the triad. I find adoption to be one of the most beautiful ways people can give back to humanity. Adoption is not for everyone, but if you have space in your heart and space in your home, then fostering and adopting are amazing ways that you can give back and build your family.

Adoption is not for everyone, but if you have space in your heart and space in your home, then fostering and adopting are amazing ways that you can give back and build your family.

‘DIY’ private adoption

Barret Anspach and Seth Garrison decided to adopt through the foster system before the pandemic ground that process, like so many others, to a halt. So, they turned to private adoption. They signed up with an agency, but in the end, they barely used the agency’s services. Instead, the mother of their child found them on PairTree (pairtreefamily.com), an online adoption matchmaking service based on personality traits.

Barret Anspach and Seth Garrison with son Estes

They worked directly with a social worker and attorneys to complete the adoption. Despite a few tense moments and the challenges of learning along the way, the entire process took less than a year, and the couple was even able to attend the birth of their son, Estes. Although Garrison says they would be confident navigating another completely DIY

adoption, the family has become so close with Estes’ birth mom that they are working with her for surrogacy to give 9-monthold Estes a sibling. What surprised you about the adoption process? It’s surprising how much attention we get for our closeness with the birth mother. I think a lot of people want to protect themselves. But the laws are strict: No one is going to take your adopted child from you. I want as much joy and love for my child as he can get. We maintain connections not because of biology — it’s more to know about yourself and where you come from. How do you navigate open adoption? We just get along, but even if we didn’t, I would make that a priority. Having an awareness of biological family is cool, not scary. She has another kid, and he visits us, too. That’s such a rich connection for our son. The biological father appeared out of nowhere at the end of the process, and that was a fearful moment because we didn’t know him. But now he’s a friend as well. He has visited us twice. Estes gets lots of Christmas presents from extended family! What was the hardest part of an independent adoption? For us, the process went as smooth as it can go, but the unknown is really hard. I didn’t understand how it worked or how agencies and legal fees depend on the state [in which the adoption takes place]. The fees can really add up and they are hard to predict. There is a lot of waiting; and be-

fore the biological parents terminate parental rights, there is a lot of legal uncertainty. What advice do you have for prospective adoptive parents? Be patient and don’t take things too personally. It will be difficult, but you don’t have to plan for the worst-case scenario — have hope. Have direct contact with birth mothers. The point is to make a connection between people with corresponding needs and to care for people in the other position. You want a child, but also [to] send good energy to the person birthing your child. They are very important, regardless of their circumstances. It’s a beautiful process.

Adoption through the foster care system

When Adrienne Query-Fiss and her husband, Victor, became licensed to provide foster care to infants nearly a decade ago, they were open to the possibility of adoption, but knew that the preferred outcome for foster children is that they be reunited with their birth parents. Their first foster child was only a few weeks old when he came to them, and ultimately was unable to be reunited with his birth mother. As they were completing Daniel’s adoption, the toddler’s newborn half-brother, Zaik, entered their family as a foster child. They adopted Zaik when he was a toddler. Today, both boys are in elementary school. The family is still in contact with many

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June 20 – August 12

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members of the boys’ biological family. Query-Fiss facilitates support groups through Amara’s STAR (Strong, Tough and Resilient) program for adoptive parents (amarafamily.org). What should people know about foster care and foster adoption? The purpose of foster care is to reunite families. It’s not adoption. It’s important to realize that adoption is also loss — a permanent loss for the child. Reunification is sad for us [foster parents], but families belong together, so we have to support it to the best of our ability because it’s in the best interest of children. You have to expect the Spanish Inquisition — expect the unexpected. You have very little control over what happens once a child is placed. It’s not the system being nefarious: Families are in crisis, and situations can evolve quickly. You are there to be the stability they [the foster children] need. You can feel scared, and it can be anxiety-producing, but we were there to be a safe person for these children, and we have to be the best safe person we can be. What was the hardest part of adopting through the foster system? Nobody is prepared to become a parent, no matter how much they think they are before it happens. There were times when I felt like I had no toolbox, no script. There were times when I got thrown a developmental curveball, and I would have benefited by knowing

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Parents Adrienne and Victor with sons Daniel and Zaik

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LO CAL R ES O UR C ES / CAM P S : ARTS + ACT I V I T I ES

what supports exist and how to access them. How to access interventions should be part of the foster parent training, but it wasn’t, at least not when I did it. I think that has changed some. There is more support for families in place now. How do you navigate open adoption? We have a relationship with the family of origin, and we navigate it the same way we would with any other family member. Our approach has always been to be welcoming and honest. You can feel vulnerable, but we have never felt unsafe. We have not needed a lot of ground rules and boundaries. Overwhelmingly, the goal of everyone involved in our situation is that we do what’s best for the kids. Their biological mother lives in another state now, so we email, FaceTime, call, text and exchange gifts. Their older siblings live an hour away. It’s really tricky to get five children at different ages scheduled to get together. But we love them, so we text often and share pictures. What advice do you have for prospective adoptive parents? Be informed, be strong and be brave if you’re considering adoption. All adopted kids have a fair amount of trauma, even infants. “The Body Keeps the Score” [by Bessel van der Kolk, M.D.] really addresses preverbal trauma. Adoption parenting is trauma-informed parenting, but it’s still parenting a child. And that kid is going to be the incredible magical being that they are. It’s not all hard things all the time, and those challenges won’t always feel so present. When my kids were toddlers, I was always waiting for the other shoe to drop. Now, it’s carpools and summer camp. You don’t have to do everything perfectly — it’s okay to make a mistake. You have to be gentle with yourself. You can still have fun. Read “Instant Family” [by Elisabeth Rose; also a movie] and find other adoptive parents. Don’t feel this decision will isolate you. Someone shares your experience and will wrap their arms around your family in a loving way. I would do it again in a heartbeat.

Find more adoption resources at parentmap.com/adoption. Seattle-based freelance writer Gemma Alexander focuses on the intersection of parenting and the arts. When she’s not writing for ParentMap, she blogs at gemmadeealexander.com and tweets @gemmadeetweet.

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Mad Science: 4 Easy Experiments for Kids

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These easy science activities put some ingenious twists on classic experiments — such as baking soda and vinegar volcanoes, color-changing flowers and cornstarch goop. Your kids will love to experiment, make a mess and get their hands dirty with science!

1. Elephant toothpaste

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A big chemical reaction? Check. A glorious, foamy mess? Check. Glitter? Naturally. Asia Citro of Fun at Home With Kids (funathomewithkids.com) gives you and your kids the know-how to make “elephant toothpaste,” which is similar to a baking soda volcano, but with an even bigger eureka factor. Follow her detailed tutorial to get the best exothermic reaction for your elephant toothpaste buck.

2. The physics of oobleck

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As with baking soda volcano and elephant toothpaste experiments, it’s easy to find recipes for making cornstarch slime. Jenae at I Can Teach My Child (icanteachmychild.com) takes this classic activity one step further by including the actual science behind the slime — or “oobleck” — along with the perfect recipe for slimy fun. Toddlers and preschoolers will love the tactile play, while older kids can learn about atoms and non-Newtonian fluids.

3. Rainbow jar Toddlers and preschoolers are endlessly enamored of rainbows, and Jen Rice at Playdough to Plato (playdoughtoplato.com) tells you how to teach the fundamentals of density by making a colorful concoction. As a bonus, she even includes a how-to for giving a lesson on molecules that even small children will understand. 4. Coloring wild carrot

Will Queen Anne’s lace (also called wild carrot) change color if the water it is placed in is dyed? In this experiment often conducted using white carnations, Melissa at Fireflies & Mud Pies (firefliesandmudpies.com) used wild carrot instead. Twenty-four hours later, your kids can see firsthand how plants and flowers pull water up through the stem. Now that’s STEM-tastic! — Kelly Knox


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Voices

A Mother’s Courage Parenting in the face of an insecurity so elemental as survival By Caroline Wright

Caroline with Theodore (l), Henry (r) and puppy Nessie

The day I realized that I would be the source of the disaster that altered my children’s lives forever, I felt paralyzed. In my prior years as a parent, spanning my oldest son’s infancy and toddlerhood, I had taken all reasonable measures to protect him from the aspects of humanity that were too terrifying, too nuanced or too mature for a mind and heart so new to this world to understand. My sons were only 1 and 4 when I was diagnosed with terminal brain cancer and given a year to live. My younger son had yet to speak his first words, had only begun to understand that I was a separate being from him. I feared my older son, whose fluidity with language and expressing his emotions hinted at his desire to know everything at once, would know too much too fast. I felt as though I’d detonated a bomb within our home, reducing all that any of us had known together to rubble. What’s worse is that I was not only responsible for setting off the explosion, but had unwittingly created the weapon inside my own body.

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Worse still: I was their most trusted source for comfort, for repair, and I had no way to know if I’d survive long enough to convince them that they would survive, too.

personhood had become a kind of abstraction through my diagnosis and treatment, during which my body and emotions operated independently of one another. I lived in this blurry, surreal space for a year.

Parenting in the face of an insecurity so elemental as survival required me to live a contradictory life of acting without judgment or fear of the future while nurturing the sources within and outside of myself that believed in my healing. (This idea alone requires a distinction between the confused ideas of healing and curing — one which I understood I control and the other which I could not, based on what I was being told by my doctors.)

And then … nothing happened. I survived. All that imagining, the protection, projection and scaffolding for a future that never came. It felt surreal, too, at first, hard to trust. (If I’m honest, it still does sometimes.) Reassimilation into “normal” life felt impossible somehow, because I no longer defined my happiness and fulfillment by the same forces I did before my diagnosis. I had changed completely.

This kind of parenting took the form of open, clear conversations, during which I couldn’t pretend to know what I couldn’t possibly know and I couldn’t attempt to shield my sons from sadness; both approaches formerly had been foundations of my parenting instincts. These conversations were led by my older son alone, their trails defined only by his questions. I mothered from a place in which my own

So, I just kept doing what I had been doing: having honest conversations with our oldest son. His resilience, his joy, begged my company. Instead of devoting my days to the search for hope as I’d done during my treatment, I devoted myself to searching for gratitude. I found it in small, everyday moments with my family. I found it in writing my story, in advocating for fellow cancer patients whose outcomes weren’t as lucky


LO CAL R ES O UR C ES / CAM P S : ARTS + ACT I V I T I ES

as mine. I found it in returning the favor of showing up for strangers the way strangers had shown up for me. When the coronavirus pandemic swept through our city, I had already begun making soup for the many friends who had left soup for me on my doorstep during my cancer treatment. It was my ritualized gratitude practice, grounding me and my family in my story of survival and joyful health.

NATURE: FUN ADVENTURES START HERE

As everyone I knew isolated themselves around the world, I recognized a generalized manifestation of themes I’d grappled with during my cancer: isolation, fear of the unknown, the shocking reckoning with mortality and loss. I felt a parallel grief along with the families I saw on the news, and eventually, people I knew personally. While navigating trauma involving health made me feel especially connected to those suffering the devastation of the pandemic, I also understood that each story is a unique journey for those involved. There aren’t shortcuts to healing — I knew this well — and the sources for it are personal. My wellspring source, which is living in real gratitude — not the kind stitched onto pillows or posted as memes on social media — is gritty and messy. It has required me to look at the very things that scared me most about my cancer experience, to turn them over and over in my hands until they are smooth and provide a kind of comfort of their own. After all, the person I once was is gone; the best I can do now is love the person I’ve become.

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Being a parent who once detonated devastation upon my family, who then also survived to reassemble the pieces, means that I will likely always parent from the space I did when I was diagnosed: being open to random, difficult conversations when they arise and following the lead of my children’s questioning. It doesn’t feel shocking anymore, this brand of vulnerability. It feels like being alive.

Caroline Wright (carolinewrightfood.com) will be setting up a soup stand — think lemonade stand, but with soup instead! — in front of Book Larder (4252 Fremont Ave. N., Seattle; booklarder.com) to raise money for glioblastoma research while celebrating a few of the favorite plant-based soups she has made for her friends in her Soup Club (also from her recent cookbook of the same name). All proceeds of the sale will directly benefit the Glioblastoma Foundation (glioblastomafoundation.org). The sale will take place May 7, 14 and 21, noon–3 p.m. in front of Book Larder.

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FAM I LY F UN

May Play List May is a good month to celebrate … mamas! By Nancy Chaney Check out many more happenings online at parentmap.com/calendar.

We’re springing and flinging in almost post-pandemic fashion, enjoying the return of favorite festivals, live theater, specialty story times and lots more. Plan to celebrate your mom, grandmas and mother figures; take the tots to “drive” some big rigs; and learn alongside the ParentMap community as we journey together raising up these kids. Happy May to all! Important note: Some events now require proof of vaccination or a negative COVID-19 test result to attend.

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� Join our next free ParentMap Live talk, during which author Tina Payne Bryson, Ph.D., will share the idea of the “yes brain” and how parents can coach kids from reactivity to receptivity. Preregister and join us for the virtual talk May 3. parentmap.com/live � Seattle Children’s Theatre is back in action, presenting moving, funny and thoughtful live theater for families. In its next show, “The Watsons Go to Birmingham – 1963,” audiences travel along with 10-year-old Kenny Watson on a 1963 road trip from Michigan to Alabama, where he and his family encounter the racism of the Jim

Crow South. Running May 3–22, this play is recommended for ages 8 and older; tickets cost $20–$50. parentmap.com/watsons

� In-person story times are returning, and the preschool crowd is so ready! Chug over to the Northwest Railway Museum for a free train-themed story time on two Wednesdays this month, May 4 and 18. Story times are free and intended for preschool-age kids along with a grown-up. parentmap.com/train-tales � Forget the stuffy roses. All moms would love a gorgeous

bouquet of locally grown tulips, peonies and other spring blooms for Mother’s Day. Choose your perfect flowers from local farmers during Pike Place Market’s 14th Annual Flower Festival, happening May 7–8. parentmap.com/flower-fest


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ParentMap Live: “The ‘Yes Brain’: Coaching Our Kids From Reactivity to Receptivity”

Pike Place Market 14th Annual Flower Festival

Northwest Folklife Festival

Online parentmap.com/live

� Animals are back in the house! Well, the animals were always there, but now we get to enjoy them in a more revealing way. Point Defiance Zoo & Aquarium reopens its Wild Wonders Outdoor Theater the weekend of May 7–8. Take a closer look at the habits and antics of the sloth, tamandua, aardvark and other critters. The show is included with regular zoo admission or membership. parentmap.com/wild-wonders � For a memorable Mother’s Day outing for your very favorite mom, book tickets to Chihuly Garden and Glass and join the Walk with the Gardener Tour, offered on spring Sundays, including May 8. Marvel at the amazing blooms as well as the enchanting glass art. The tour is included with museum admission. parentmap.com/garden-walk � Experience the Spirit of Africa through both traditional and modern music and dance at

the next Seattle Center Festál series event on May 14. Whether the fest is in person or virtual — we’re waiting to hear for sure for 2022 — turn up for rhythms and cultural customs from African countries as well as the African diaspora. parentmap.com/spirit-of-africa

Seattle parentmap.com/flower-fest

months. Hop aboard May 14 or 28, 10 a.m.–4 p.m. It’s free, though donations are appreciated. parentmap.com/kitsap-live

� Head to Tacoma’s Wright Park to admire the recently reno-

Spirit of Africa at Seattle Center Festál May 14

� Ferry your train lovers of all ages over to Port Orchard to catch a Kitsap Live Steamers train ride. Friendly railroad enthusiasts take passengers on their mini trains on the second and fourth Saturdays of most

vated W.W. Seymour Botanical Conservatory, holding its grand reopening on May 14. New features include a floor-toceiling plant wall, a golden dart frog habitat and more. Admis-

Seattle parentmap.com/folklife

sion prices to be announced. parentmap.com/seymour

� Hipp hipp hurra! Ballard’s beloved 17th of May Parade is back, happening on — you guessed it — May 17. This community celebration brings together marching bands, elementary kids on unicycles, Scandinavian organizations and the whole neighborhood. The parade starts at 6 p.m. and winds along Market Street. parentmap.com/mai-17 � ParentMap welcomes back Nate and Kaley Klemp, authors and speakers behind the 80/80 marriage concept, presenting their next ParentMap Live talk, titled “How to Stop Fighting and Start Winning Together in Parenting and Marriage.” Sounds like a pretty good plan, right? Preregister, grab your partner and join us online May 17. parentmap.com/live � Don’t miss the kids’ paradise that is the Lacey Spring Fun Fair, taking place May 21–22.

THROUGH JULY 17 Burke Museum UW Campus, Seattle

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PA R E N T M A P / M AY 2 0 2 2 / 1 9


FAM I LY F UN

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This free event features inflatables, live entertainment, dinos in attendance on Saturday and a car show on Sunday! parentmap.com/fun-fair

� Big rigs, garbage trucks and emergency vehicles roll out May 21, on display for the admiration of young Northwest truck enthusiasts! Marysville welcomes the community back to its free hands-on Touch A Truck event. Sound-sensitive families can join for the last hour, designated as siren- and horn-free. parentmap.com/trucks � Our community’s iconic Northwest Folklife Festival returns to Seattle Center May 27–30. This free familyfriendly festival is a Memorial Day weekend tradition going back 50 years. Join in person or tune in virtually to experience the best local artists and culture bearers anywhere. parentmap.com/folklife

Presented by:

� On Memorial Day, May 30, honor local service members who have died as well as veterans and active military personnel in Arlington’s moving annual Memorial Day Parade. The parade begins at 10 a.m. and runs along North Olympic Avenue. parentmap.com/parade

Nancy Chaney is ParentMap’s Out + About editor.

FOOD IS ESSENTIAL. Your support for Hopelink’s End Summer Hunger campaign will help ensure that no child in our community goes hungry this summer.

S P O N S O R ED EVEN TS

May 21-22 Lacey Spring Fun Fair Don’t miss two days of FREE family fun. Enjoy rides and activities, live entertainment and more! Meet dinosaurs from Dino Crew Northwest! laceyspringfunfair.com

hopelink.org/ESH

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51st Annual Northwest Folklife Festival In with the Old, In with the New! The Northwest Folklife festival is back in person at Seattle Center and virtually on Memorial Day weekend. nwfolklife.org/festival


Don’t borrow your children’s future. Build it.

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Family Media Standout Graphic Novels for Kids Diverse titles for your family’s summer reading list By Laura Wheatman Hill

I’m a parent, English tutor and teacher. Over the years, my students, kids and I have enjoyed many, many wonderful graphic novels. Something I love about graphic novels is the breadth of diversity represented. When I say “diversity,” I mean racial diversity, neurodiversity and diversity with respect to gender/sexuality expression represented by the characters and/or authors. This list is by no means an exhaustive or authoritative list; it is offered more as a starting point for your young readers. These recommended reads are ordered roughly by the age of the reader, though with graphic novels, I often see kids reading a greater range of content and at higher reading levels, so I wouldn’t count out any of these titles unless the content doesn’t seem right for your reader. ‘Pilu of the Woods’ by Mai K. Nguyen This lovely book about a girl, a dog and a forest spirit is my daughter’s favorite. She identifies with the character who has big, sometimes scary, feelings. ‘Mighty Jack’ by Ben Hatke Everyone in my house — nay, everyone I know who has read it — has enjoyed this alien take on the Jack and the Beanstalk tale. I also appreciate the portrayal of Jack’s sister, who is a neurodivergent hero in this three-book series.

‘Nightlights’ by Lorena Alvarez I will read anything by Alvarez, a Colombian illustrator and writer who creates whimsical, super-saturated artwork to complement topics related to mental health. This book is the first in a series and is short enough to read in one sitting. My kids have loved it since they were little, but note that some kids might find the magical elements a tad spooky.

‘Guts’ by Raina Telgemeier Telgemeier is a hitmaker with both my elementary-age and teenage readers. This autobiographical account of her childhood depicts the physical manifestations our worries can take in our bodies, and, unlike many other books, does so very realistically. This enjoyable read is a nice counterbalance to other stories in which anxieties are presented as metaphors.

‘Princess Princess Ever After’ by K. O’Neill We have enjoyed several offerings by this author/illustrator, but “Princess,” a queer graphic novel, was a particular hit with my Disney-loving kid who appreciates adventure and female warriors who work together.

‘The Baby-sitters Club’ series Based on the novels by Ann M. Martin, variously adapted as a graphic novel series by Raina Telgemeier, Gale Galligan, Gabriella Epstein and Chan Chau

‘The Legend of Auntie Po’ by Shing Yin Khor This National Book Award finalist reimagines the Paul Bunyan myth, recasting the legend with a Chinese woman. The story is told through Mei, a teenager working at a Sierra Nevada logging camp.

I love how different adapters have approached the various stories in the “Baby-sitters Club” canon. For younger readers, my daughter enjoyed the “Baby-sitters Little Sister” graphic novel series, adapted by Katy Farina. I haven’t had the heart — gulp! — to break the news to her yet that the Netflix series has been canceled. Besides being great, the film

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‘The Witch Boy’ by Molly Knox Ostertag The New York Times described this book as having “natural-feeling diversity,” which struck me as odd phrasing, but it’s true. More than just a graphic novel about diverse characters, it’s a lovely coming-of-age story about finding your true self within the context of your own family. ‘Pashmina’ by Nidhi Chanani I appreciated the author’s choice of when to use black and white versus color in this book. It’s a story about an Indian American girl whose mother refuses to talk about her life in India. ‘New Kid’ by Jerry Craft My middle-school-age students in a predominantly white school read this book about a boy who is one of the few students of color in his new school. It does a nice job of addressing the conflict between one’s home and family culture and one’s school culture, and how those cultures can sometimes be at odds with who you are as a whole. ‘Snapdragon’ by Kat Leyh Magic, generational story lines, teen friendship: This book has everything. There are some plot twists that I haven’t seen too often in YA graphic literature, and they sparked some important conversations in my house about love and friendship. ‘Persepolis: The Story of a Childhood’ by Marjane Satrapi This graphic novel and movie adaptation have been around for as long as I’ve been teaching, and while it tells the story of a childhood, it is perhaps more suitable for teens, as it takes place during the Islamic Revolution in Iran.

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As an English teacher and tutor, I have worked with some fantastic kids, not all of whom consider themselves “readers.” Some kids don’t enjoy reading; others may have processing disorders or neurodivergence; and some may speak English as a second language, or have other reasons for avoiding the written word. When reading a tome of classic literature might be difficult for a student, I recommend the graphic novel version when one is available. Here are five of my students’ favorites:


LO CAL R ES O UR C ES / S C HO OL S , PRES C HO OL S , N WA IS

‘Anne of Green Gables’ by Lucy Maud Montgomery, adapted by Mariah Marsden and illustrated by Brenna Thummler The gorgeous art in this graphic novel sucked in my early-elementary readers. Promises of more adventures from Anne and her friends in books and the various film and TV adaptations of Lucy Maud Montgomery’s classic children’s novels made this the perfect gateway to “Green Gables.”

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‘A Wrinkle in Time’ by Madeleine L’Engle, adapted by Hope Larson I didn’t know I needed a graphic adaptation of this middle-grade classic, but I’m thrilled it exists. Sometimes a graphic novel is not meant to replace a classic so much as to present a take on the world the author created. I enjoyed Larson’s visualizations of all the wondrous worlds in the novel. ‘Anne Frank’s Diary: The Graphic Adaptation’ by Anne Frank, adapted by Ari Folman and illustrated by David Polonsky I can’t believe how these collaborators so gorgeously evoke Anne’s inner world in this graphic novel adaptation. I’ve read the original diary and play many times as a student and teacher, but only after reading the graphic adaptation with my students did I feel the beauty and pain of being a teenage girl hiding in an attic. ‘To Kill a Mockingbird’ by Harper Lee, adapted by Fred Fordham I’m sorry to say it, but most kids hate reading “To Kill a Mockingbird.” It’s usually thrown into a curriculum to help ground a conversation about racism in the American South. Racism is actually a subplot in this coming-of-age novel about a young girl; there are much better offerings by Black writers to explore the history of racism in America. When students are assigned to read it in class and struggle through the truly soporific first chapter, I point them to the graphic novel, which moves at a clip and keeps all the most important plot points intact. ‘The Odyssey’ by Homer, adapted by Gareth Hinds This is another classic that many students struggle with because of the heft of the original. With its gorgeous illustrations and clear, concise plotting, this adaptation is a fantastic starting point for introducing the original text.

Laura Wheatman Hill, a mom of two, is also a writer, playwright, teacher and tutor.

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Ages + Stages Parent Ed 2.0 Access to parenting support has gotten easier during the pandemic By Annie Garrett, M.Ed. As a first-time parent in 2017, I found that returning to work after my parental leave meant parting ways with more than just my infant. It also meant leaving behind my parenting support group and the parent-infant programs we participated in. I yearned to return to the parenting group, but my work schedule wouldn’t allow for it. Fast-forward to summer 2020. I’m working from home and decide to spend my lunch hour each Monday in an online parenting course through Hand in Hand Parenting (handinhandparenting.org). It was like having a blood transfusion. In a matter of weeks, my relationship with my daughter and my confidence as a parent feel restored. Fast-forward another year, and my son is born. The parenting programs I’d had to abandon upon returning to work in 2017 are now available to us fully online, and research says this modality is just as effective as in-person classes. Talk about a pandemic silver lining! But that’s not all. More options have opened up at low or no cost; Program for Early Parent Support (PEPS; peps.org), for example, now has a wonderfully simplified sliding-scale pay structure and offers programming for parents of teens as well as affinity groups for LGBTQ parents, single parents and others. Programs that lead with racial equity, such as Families of Color Seattle (focseattle.org), are finally out at the forefront where they belong. And longestablished institutions such as the University of Washington (ccfwb.uw.edu) are spinning out events (many of them for free) that better represent the broader community. Here is a roundup of new offerings from local leaders in parent education:

Sound Discipline • sounddiscipline.org

In its own words: “Sound Discipline offers parenting workshops in a relaxing, fun environment. All of our parenting workshops are currently offered online. … Parents build community and participate in activities designed to help them understand themselves, deepen an understanding of their children, and bring more peace and joy into the home.” Online options: Most workshops/events are currently offered online. Pricing: While most are fee-based, some workshops are free. Sound Discipline often partners with local organizations that will

cover costs so that its members may attend for free. The workshop recommendation of workshop recommendations: “Teaching Parenting the Positive Discipline Way” is a renowned workshop with an international following. Age range: Relevant for parents of children ages 0–18 Testimonials: “I think this is the only parenting class I have taken where I felt empowered and not riddled with guilt afterward.”

UW Center for Child and Family Well-Being • ccfwb.uw.edu

In its own words: “We are committed to serving as a resource and partner in promoting the well-being of children and families through evidence-based programs, workshops and courses.” Online options: Most workshops and events are currently offered on Zoom.

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AGES + STAGES

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Pricing: Drop-in sessions are free and open to the public. See the full list on the website. Age ranges: Varies by event/workshop. Some workshops cover topics related to parenting children and teens, while others are oriented toward parental self-care and education. Retreat-like topics: I’m breathing easier just reading the titles of these workshops: “Nature & Nurturing: Parenting With Your Child’s Temperament in Mind,” “Rooted in Compassion,” and “Cultivating the MindBody Connection.”

Families of Color Seattle (FOCS) •

focseattle.org In its own words: “Families of Color Seattle (FOCS) is a nonprofit organization that is connecting parents to build a loving community of families of color. Our programs include parent groups, com-

munity resources and events, and racial equity consulting. … We equip parents and educators with tools to talk with children on identity, racism, inclusion and equity, and trauma-informed practices.” Online options: Affinity group programs for parents of newborns, waddlers and children of multiple ages meet virtually for 8–10 weeks. Virtual consultations/presentations for the broader community are also available. Workshops that wow: FOCS presentations on anti-racist parenting techniques are worth every penny. The organization delivers pre- and post-presentation materials and provides an interactive workshop that will get you thinking, talking and acting. Pricing: Participation in affinity groups is free to families. Ages: Offerings for parents with infants, waddlers or children of multiple ages are available. Testimonial: “As new parents of a young

infant, we thought it was imperative that we connect with other parents of color on parenting, social justice and community [topics]. Having the ability to be exposed to other cultures, opinions and backgrounds has really benefited us as a family. FOCS is the bridge of those relationships, conversations and experiences.”

Program for Early Parent Support (PEPS) • peps.org

In its own words: “Since 1983, the Program for Early Parent Support (PEPS), a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization, has helped parents connect and grow as they begin their journey into parenthood. PEPS’ parent support programs educate, inform and create community.” Online options: All groups are now virtual. Not just for babies anymore: PEPS may have been born in the ’80s, but it’s still hip! The organization has expanded its traditional infant-parent groups to run the

How to Stop Fighting and Start Winning Together in Parenting and Marriage Tuesday, May 17

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range of development from expectant parent through parenting teens. Pricing: PEPS offers flexible pricing, ranging from $0 to $399, depending upon your financial circumstances and the program you are choosing. Age range: Prenatal–teen Testimonial: “[Parenting is] a difficult journey, but it gets easier if you have a support network. … PEPS allowed me to build my village in Seattle, and three years after our first meeting, our group remains strongly connected with not only our first kids growing together but also our second kids starting to interact.”

Priceless Parenting • pricelessparenting.com

In its own words: “These parenting classes incorporate the latest research in ways that touch both the head and the heart. Classes are designed for the ages of your children. You’ll hear real-life stories that make the ideas come alive. You’ll be able to apply what you are learning immediately with your own kids.” Online options: Once you register for an online parenting class, you can start immediately. The classes take about eight hours to complete. Go at your own pace. You will be invited to join a monthly group coaching call for the first three months. You will receive a certificate of completion at the end. Pricing: All of the above is included for $89. Age range: Courses are broken up into three age groups: 0–5, 6–12, 13–18. Fun fact: Founder Kathy Slattengren is a Seattleite and a mother of two.

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A flexible and A convenient way for people living flexible and convenient waywith disabilities to invest in their quality of life.

for people living with disabilities to invest in their quality of life.

Plan website: www.WashingtonStateABLE.com Customer Service Center: 1-844-600-2253 or 1-844-888-2253 (TTY)

WashingtonStateABLE.com • 1-844-600-2253

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As they say in Positive Discipline courses, “Practice makes better.” May these resources help you gain perspective and confidence in your parenting practice and help you to become the parent you want to be, more often than not.

3/6/20 12:26 PM

Take A Free Virtual Cooking Class Take A Free Virtual Cooking Class

Discover more parent education resources at parentmap.com/parentEd, and see ParentMap’s schedule of upcoming ParentEd Talks at parentmap.com/live.

Annie Garrett is a faculty member in parent education and manager of the Early Childhood Education Bachelor of Applied Science Degree program at Seattle Colleges. She also volunteers as a PEPS presenter. She holds a master’s degree in education from the University of Washington.

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