ParentMap February 2017 - South

2017

CAMP FAIRS

’cause parenting is a trip!

FREE • PAGE 14

What’s the big deal with

mindfulness ANyWAY?

see page 6

Spring arts extravaganza 24 FAMILY PICKS TO INSPIRE AND ENTERTAIN 22 Teaching your kids to code and think critically 9

MAKING MINDFULNESS MATTER Empathy, kindness and get a boost with these techniques 12

MUSEUMS THAT WELCOME CURIOSITY

These local options are kid-friendly, cultured, free 30

PIERCE THURSTON FEBRUARY 2017

THE HEART OF COMPUTER SCIENCE

Women’s care that grows with you.

CHI Franciscan Health offers expert maternity and children’s health services across the South Sound

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inside

PHOTO BY WILLIAM PERRIGEN

FEBRUARY 2017

22

Parenting

37 R ELATIONSHIPS

Will you be our Valentine? tame the tears; civics for the family; backyard brainstorm; so, about those resolutions . . .

Out + About

20–21 F EBRUARY CALENDAR 22 S PRING ARTS EXTRAVAGANZA

4 PLAY LIST

24 family picks to inspire and entertain

February is a good month to . . .

PHOTO COURTESY AMBREIA MEADOWS-FERNANDEZ

Love in the age of diaper duty Four unexpected ways parenthood changed one woman’s marriage

4 PARENTMAP.COM

30 P LEASE TOUCH

6 DEAR READER

7 museums with free art spaces and more crafty-cool programs for kids

A more mindful mom?

I’ll believe it when I see it

Feature

9 FULL STREAM AHEAD

12 C HASING MINDFUL

How simply tuning in is helping families, students and communities be kind

12

Advertising Sections

15–19 C amps + Activities 33 NWAIS Schools 35–39 Schools + Preschools Cover: Photo by Will Austin; illustrations

by Alli Arnold

30

JIAYING GRYGIEL

9

WILL AUSTIN

At the heart of computer science How coding and critical thinking work together

37

parentmap.com • February 2017 • 3

play list

navigate great stuff daily!

Tame the tears

Parenting pro Laura Kastner, Ph.D., shares her experience in a new seven-part series that busts common parenting myths. Plus, meet Kastner in person at our “Tame the Tears” lecture on Feb. 28. parentmap. com/kastnertips

February

Will you be our Valentine?

is a great month to . . .

Skip those cute but overpriced store-bought Valentines this year and have the kids make their own. These crafty ideas aren’t hard to make and they’ve got that homemade touch that’ll make hearts soar on Feb. 14. parentmap.com/valentines

1 HIKE AND SEEK l

The original outdoor tech-driven treasure

Civics for the family

hunt, long before Pokémon Go, was geocaching. Find tips and top geocaches (Legos, anyone?) at parentmap.com/ geocache.

activities and get a conversation going about civics. It’s

2 COUPLE UP l

For Presidents Day (Feb. 20), pick one or two of these not as boring as it sounds; one game has each member of the family play president for a day (inauguration not included). parentmap.com/presidents-day

So, about those resolutions . . .

Operation getaway: You can do it! Head for the hills, the coast or wine country with your honey and fire up the “we” time. parentmap.com/getaways

Us too. If fitness is your focus in 2017,

3 DATE YOUR KID l

Let your New Year’s resolutions slide?

Backyard brainstorm

Summer may feel like a distant memory but it’s never

restart with these handy tips on how to

too early to start planning for the sunny season. These

exercise with your kids (yes, it can be

10 ideas will inspire you to transform your backyard into

done!). One suggestion: Harness the

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power of apps like Pokémon Go to get

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up and at’em. parentmap.com/fitness

Use the month of love as an excuse to plan one-one adventures with your kiddos in roller-skating, pinball, starwatching or more. Finish up with hot cocoa and story telling. parentmap.com/ parent-kid 4 THROW A SNOWBALL l

Snow is the secret ingredient that makes every family activity fun; we show you where to sled, snowshoe and ski in this awesome list of active winter adventures. parentmap.com/active-fun 5 E XPLORE THE NEW l

KIDSQUEST

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4 • February 2017 • parentmap.com

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parentmap.com • February 2017 • 5

dear reader NOW OPEN

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A

ppropriately labeled a fiercely multi-tasking whirling dervish, I recently registered for a two-month Mindful Self-Compassion (MSC) course at the University of Washington’s Center for Child and Family Well-Being. The class meets three hours a week (!) but it’s a fitting change to my routine since ParentMap’s editorial focus for 2017 is mindfulness.

Our families, our cities, our country, our world need more kindness, empathy and compassion — a lesson made all too obvious by the recent election madness. That’s why we’re starting our series on mindfulness with an article about being kind, both to yourself and as your child’s first and most important teacher (“Chasing mindfulness,” p. 12).

Maya Sulkin For me, that chase after mindfulness has already been a long one. I half-heartedly enrolled in the UW course, lassoing in my gal pal Emma so we could jointly growl through rush hour traffic from Issaquah to the U District. I figured at least there’d be one big upside to my new weekly commitment: a regular visit over cheap, delicious dinners.

Turns out the class is unexpectedly extraordinary. Every Thursday, I land from a stressful week into a world of calm. We, a group of 20 or so strangers of diverse ages and backgrounds, settle in with beautiful guided mediations, poignant poetry and self-compassion exercises (yep — we hold our own hands).

Which brings me to that glass of water you saw on the cover. Why is my wiseminded 15-year-old daughter Maya, one of the most naturally mindful and kind people I know, patiently holding that glass?

One night in class, the teacher held up a glass of her own. “Describe this,” she told us. There were the expected responses: It’s half full. It’s half empty. It weighs such and such amount. The professor explained her thinking: If you take a quick sip and put the glass down, it’ll feel near weightless. If you hold it straight out for a minute, your wrist will ache. Hold it for 20 minutes, your elbow will burn. Hold it for an hour, your shoulder and back will surely go numb.

“When you numb the dark, you numb the light,” she concluded, that statement piercing me like a lightning bolt. “What we resist, persists,” she continued. “What we feel, we can heal.”

And those are words we all need to hear.

So join us on our year-long conversation with experts, educators and parents as we explore how families and schools use mindfulness to cultivate kindness, compassion and empathy.

Speaking of, I’d be remiss if I didn’t acknowledge the extraordinary kindness, compassion, and empathy of our former executive editor Natalie Singer-Velush. In her five years with ParentMap, Natalie graced our pages with her own brilliant work (including the stunning “Stolen Youth”). She also served as the editor for many dozens of award-winning articles. Natalie will be greatly missed as she moves on to a new venture but she has forever shaped ParentMap’s voice with her natural wit, keen intellect and good humor. Natalie, our team wishes you the greatest happiness and success.

WILL AUSTIN

In this interactive exhibit visitors will experience how color impacts our daily lives, view colorful object displays and learn about the significance and usage of color by our contemporary artists.

A more mindful mom?

I’ll believe it when I see it

ParentMap

February 2017, Vol. 15, No. 2 PUBLISHER/EDITOR Alayne Sulkin

EDITORIAL

EXECUTIVE EDITOR Natalie Singer-Velush OUT + ABOUT EDITOR Elisa Murray ASSISTANT EDITOR Elisabeth Kramer CALENDAR EDITOR Nancy Chaney OUT + ABOUT ASSISTANT Jessica Plesko PROOFREADER Sunny Parsons CONTRIBUTORS

Will Austin, Nancy Schatz Alton, JiaYing Grygiel, Rebecca Hill, Ambreia Meadows-Fernandez

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ADVERTISING CLIENT SERVICES SPECIALIST

Jessica Collet

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EVENT OPERATIONS Tara Buchan EVENT + MARKETING COORDINATOR

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ODESSA BROWN CHILDREN’S CLINIC

Joan Duffell COMMITTEE FOR CHILDREN John Gottman, Ph.D.

Open Registration/Preschool Information Fair March 25, 10am

THE GOTTMAN INSTITUTE PROFESSOR EMERITUS, UNIVERSITY OF WASHINGTON

northseattlecoops.org

Programs for children Birth to 5 years

Laura Kastner, Ph.D.

PSYCHIATRY + BEHAVIORAL SCIENCES, UNIVERSITY OF WASHINGTON

Bea Kelleigh

VICE PRESIDENT AT DOVETAILING, LLC

Yaffa Maritz, M.A.

LISTENING MOTHERS + COMMUNITY OF MINDFUL PARENTS

Ron Rabin THE KIRLIN FOUNDATION Daniel J. Siegel, M.D.

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FOUR MUST-SEE LECTURES

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1/12/17 12:37 PM

Managing tantrums, theirs and yours - Laura Kastner, Ph.D. Paid parental leave, gender equality - Kristin Rowe-Finkbeiner Kids, chemicals and a safe home - Dr. Sheela Sathyanarayana See Happy marriage, happy pg 24! family - Dr. John Gottman

parentmap.com/lectures parentmap.com • February 2017 • 7

ParentLab ab

Details at www.TheGreatNWGlassQuest.com

The Art & Science of Parenting

Are you losing patience with your child?

“Keen insight into the inner world of children.”

—Marsha Linehan, Ph.D.

Getting to

CALM THE EARLY YEARS

Cool-Headed Strategies for Raising Happy, Caring, and Independent Three- to Seven-Year-Olds

FIND THE TREASURES

at the 8th Annual Great Northwest Glass Quest

FEB 17-26, 2017

The greatest treasure hunt in the Pacific Northwest! Search for and find unique “Glass Treasures” hand-blown by Mark Ellinger, world-renowned glass artist.

“Clueballs” will be hidden at a variety of host businesses and in community sights around the Stanwood-Camano area. Find a “Clueball” and return it to the location identified inside for an authentic limited edition “Glass Treasure.”

Laura S. Kastner, Ph.D. “Kastner masterfully guides parents through the complex maze of parenting.”

—Yaffa Maritz, director, Community of Mindful Parenting

Laura Kastner, Ph.D. Tame the Tears: Parenting Positively Learn skills to help encourage positive behavior, and manage dreaded tantrums (yours and theirs!).

TUES, FEB 28

,cause parenting is a trip!

THE BROCKEY CONFERENCE CENTER, WEST SEATTLE

Get tickets now!

, cause parenting is a trip!

parentmap.com/lectures

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1/17/17 2:25 PM

ONE HOUR SPECIAL

Premieres Feb 20 | 11a FOR MORE INFORMATION VISIT 8 • February 2017 • parentmap.com

KCTS9.org/kids

stream

At the heart of computer science How coding and critical thinking work together

By Rebecca Hill

W

e are in what economists call the Fourth Industrial Revolution, a global tidal wave that integrates digital information technology into every intimate aspect of our lives and with impacts on every industry.

Yet, in any K−12 school today, you will find techsavvy students, but not computer-savvy students.

A student might know how to use a device or to code, but they don’t necessarily understand what they did and why.

And while STEM-focused parents might be thrilled that their children are now programming a computer game while barely out of diapers, it’s not enough. To fuel the economies of the future, STEM (science, technology, engineering, math) experts say, we need students who can figure out what goes on behind the algorithms.

To get there, we have a long way to go. More students are gaining access to computer science than ever, yet many kids, especially girls and students of color, still are not being exposed to in-depth computer science education,

FULL

S T R E A M

AHEAD

ScienceTechnologyRoboticsEngineeringArtsMath

which goes beyond coding and programming.

While 93 percent of parents say they want their children to be learning computer science, only 40 percent of K−12 school systems teach programming; fewer than half of U.S. schools offer any computer science courses; and only 8 percent of STEM graduates study computer science, according to Code.org. Currently, just 11 percent of Washington schools have computer science offerings.

“It is important for students today to not only be consumers of technology, but also the innovators and creators of new technology,” says Nimisha Ghosh Roy, Northwest regional manager for Code.org. “To do this, an understanding of what has gone into the development of technology is essential.”

Prepping for the jobs of the future Technology is no longer just a computer.

It’s an algorithm, a sensor, a program and a

neurotransmitter. Because computers are more complex than ever before, we need people who understand the evolving functions and potential of these devices. With information technology positions growing 36 percent over the past decade, technology is the fastest-growing STEM field. By 2020, the economy is projected to add 1.4 million information technology jobs, according to Code.org. But U.S. schools are only on track to educate 400,000 computer scientists by then, according to a 2016 study by the Information Technology and Innovation Foundation.

To teach a new generation of computer scientists and fill upcoming computer jobs, schools need standards and curricula, teachers to teach computer science and a viable pathway to higher education.

Some states are requiring computer science in their curriculum. “This is a good initiative in the sense that being able to use computers these days [but not be able to] create software is the equivalent to 200 years ago when people could read, but not write,” says Andrew Davidson, professor with Human Centered Design, and Engineering, University of Washington and former high school computer science teacher. In the future, says Davidson, people will need to create software if they want to survive in the job market. >> Editor’s note: Science, technology, robotics, engineering, art and math: In our schools and communities, there is more demand than ever for STREAM. Yet only about a third of eighth-graders score “proficient” in math and science.

In this ongoing series, sponsored this month by Coding with Kids, we’ll explore how schools and organizations are approaching STREAM in new, game-changing ways.

parentmap.com • February 2017 • 9

stream

At the heart of computer science continued from page 9 set of concepts and practices that students should To get there, education administrators need to master at each grade level. answer questions such as: Is computer science an In addition to this framework, the CSTA elective or requirement? Should all students be created the Interim K−12 Computer Science required to take computer science to graduate?

Standards, which lay out a more specific, gradeWhat type of curriculum should be used, and level guide for state education departments and what type of teacher should be hired? These school districts to revise their computer science questions linger unanswered in many school curriculum or to build one. districts today.

Along with some other states, Right now, only seven Computational Washington used the national states have adopted K−12 framework and these interim standards for computer thinking is the standards to create its own science instruction, although computer science standards for many other states are intellectual heart students, adopted in 2016. working on it. Thirty-three Since this state adopted the schools nationally count of computer Computer Science K−12 Learning computer science as a core science Standards, Washington STEM graduation requirement. But (a statewide nonprofit focused in most schools, the focus on increasing interest in and access is on skills rather than learning to STEM for all students) and the state Office computing concepts and computational thinking, of Superintendent of Public Instruction (OSPI) which is where, many experts say, computer have convened a Computer Science Standards science education really needs to evolve.

Committee, which will review standards content, Computer science is a fundamental part of says Andy Shouse, Ph.D., chief program officer of our future, says Roy. “Computer science is about Washington STEM. Rolling out over a period of innovation, problem solving and creativity — from four to five years, these initiatives are being skills that are important and transferable in many, funded, says Shouse, through a public-private many areas of work.” partnership, a mix of state and private funding Fixing computer science from foundations and corporate partners.

Organizations such as Code.org, the National Washington standards also established Science Foundation, Computer Science Teachers computer science as “an essential academic Association (CSTA) and private corporate partners subject,” which means that students can count such as Microsoft, Facebook, Google and others computer science as a math/science credit toward have been working to bring more computer science their graduation requirements. into the classroom. By pushing the conversation, The standards also focus on computational these organizations are aggressively promoting the thinking, an essential practice for understanding creation of standards and curricula in schools. technology, says Ro. “This is a key skill set, Nationally, the K–12 Computer Science essential regardless of the field or industry.”

Framework, created by the Association of The magic of Computing Machinery, Code.org, CSTA and computational thinking others, advanced standards by providing a broad conceptual framework for computer science Computational thinking is the intellectual heart education. of computer science, says Lazowska. Because it This framework is a landmark, says Ed requires abstraction, modularity, stepwise problem Lazowska, who holds the University of decomposition, modeling, algorithmic thinking, Washington’s Bill and Melinda Gates Chair of debugging and other skill sets, it teaches a skill, Computer Science and Engineering, because while he says, every 21st-century citizen needs to learn. it doesn’t provide curriculum, it clearly defines a “It is every bit as fundamental as mathematics, 10 • February 2017 • parentmap.com

biology, chemistry and physics,” Lazowska says.

Because computational thinking is not taught in K−12 computer science classrooms today, adapting it for the classroom is important. In a recent paper, Uri Wilensky, Ph.D., of Northwestern University broke down computational thinking into four strands of computer practices for learning: • Data practices: practices related to the

analysis, collection, manipulation and visualization of data • Modeling and simulation practices: the

ability to create, refine and use models such as flowcharts, diagrams, equations, formulas, computer simulation and physical models to simplify certain features of phenomena • Computational problem-solving practices:

identifying the computational tools and methods necessary to solve problems such as debugging or troubleshooting • Systems thinking practices: breaking down

complex practices with multiple variables that require thinking from a system’s perspective “People nowadays in labs don’t wear a lab coat, but they are actually working hard and taking computations trying to figure out models, looking for patterns in data, and that is something people largely understand,” says Wilensky.

Another value of computational thinking is that it increases student engagement, creating a deeper understanding of scientific content. For instance, with computational modeling and simulation tools, students can create a 3-D model of the genome and how it works on a computer screen.

This is tangible evidence that students can see and then replicate.

Developing curriculum One big challenge in improving computer science K−12 education is curricula. Organizations such as Code.org have online resources, but no broad curriculum corresponding with the standards has been developed. Right now, the only official curriculum that exists for computer science is the Advanced Placement (AP) Computer Science A class and AP Computer Science Principles,

a new course released in 2016 that focuses less on programming knowledge and more on the principles and interdisciplinary nature of computer science.

While it is valuable to have this curriculum in place, the fact is that, like any AP class, it does not reach all students, especially students of color and girls. Still, it has been one of the fastest-growing AP exams in the past few years, says Lazowska.

An Education Week report found that, in 2014, the number of students who took AP Computer Science A rose 26 percent over the previous year when that number had previously been static for more than 30 years. Yet just 20 percent of test takers overall were female. Only 4 percent of test takers were African-American, and 9 percent were Hispanic. (Black and Hispanic students made up 14 percent and 19 percent, respectively, of high school seniors in 2014.)

Zeroing in on user-centered design: a case study Because we are so fascinated with technology, for many years, we have gobbled up any and all new devices. Today, the quest is to design technology to fit the user’s needs as opposed to a user adapting to technology, something called usercentered interface or design. This is one approach to teaching computer science to students.

Davidson teaches King County/Puget Sound area high school students about user-centered design through user-centered design charrettes.

In a charrette, students participate in a userdesign activity, such as creating user interfaces for a website, mobile app or a physical device.

They work in small groups to brainstorm what the user might need and then develop their own use-case scenarios and an interaction design for a particular technology application.

“The whole idea is that rather than inventing a technology or algorithm or system [and] then finding a use for it,” says Davidson, “we start from the point of view of the user.” What he found was that students really liked learning something that, they felt, could actually get them a job.

Another plus is that this type of user-centered design focuses more on people, so it appeals to kids, especially girls who want to work with people and be involved in social aspects of learning while still using technology, says Davidson. He is currently trying to expand the program to reach more students in Washington. n Rebecca Hill is a freelance writer who writes about education, literacy, libraries, parenting/family and science. She has been published in a variety of national and online publications. She lives in Zionsville, Indiana, and is the mother of two high-school boys.

parentmap.com • February 2017 • 11

feature

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When Jenny Zenner’s twin boys were babies, she wore the patch of carpet in front of their crib thin as she paced while using the breathing techniques from her mindfulness practice.

“My son Fauss was so fussy that I would ‘om’ to him repeatedly because it was the only way I knew how to shift my own energy. He would start to resonate to me and ‘om hum’ back to me,” says Zenner. On their first airplane descent, Fauss started to get agitated. But instead of crying, he began humming “om.” A fellow passenger looked at her and said, “That’s not unpleasant.”

To Zenner, it was a small, but real, sign of success.

Six years later, Zenner continues to use mindfulness to try to be a better mother — it’s never a place she arrives at, but more of an ongoing journey with successes and challenges. This past holiday season, Fauss asked her to open up an ornament containing a note that read: “Mommy, I wish that you would be better.” Upon further discussion, she learned her son wished she would yell less.

And don’t many of us want to yell less? Sure, we would like to keep the peace and to model good behavior for our kids (not to mention keep our blood pressure down). But increasingly, many families and experts feel that we need to become more mindful in order to strengthen something else that feels as though it’s taken a national beating lately: our empathy and compassion.

If we were to give our own “state of the union” on American empathy, we might say it’s a bit sluggish.

According to one recent review of an empathy and compassion standard assessment taken by 13,000 college students between 1979 and 2009, levels of compassion and empathy levels are lower now than at any time during the past 30 years. That doesn’t even take into account the bruising from this past political season, which definitely spilled over into our kids’ worlds as they watched parents 12 • February 2017 • parentmap.com

Chasing

How simply tuning in is helping families,

By Nancy Schatz Alton

and politicians speak and behave in an unprecedentedly rough way.

And a new global survey, led by William Chopik, an assistant professor of psychology at Michigan State University, found that while the United States ranks in the top 10 empathetic nations in the world, we aren’t number one (that distinction belongs to Ecuador). The U.S. is number seven.

So, we could stand to become more compassionate.

But what does mindfulness have to do with it?

Potentially, a lot.

A study conducted at Northeastern University and published in 2013 in Psychological Science found that eight weeks of meditation proved enough to triple the likelihood of a person helping a stranger in distress, such as a person with an injured foot who had nowhere to sit.

Another study, conducted in 2008, found that even just a few minutes of loving-kindness meditation “increased feelings of social connection and positivity” toward strangers, suggesting “that this easily implemented technique may help to increase positive social emotions and decrease social isolation.”

Once we are calmer, we can start viewing life experiences through a wider lens, says Susan Kaiser Greenland, a Los Angeles–based mindfulness and meditation teacher who developed Inner Kids, one of the first mindfulness programs in education, which began in 2001.

“It can be helpful to think of mindfulness as a one-two punch. First, it can calm your nervous system when it’s in a reactive, inflexible mode,” Greenland

mindful

students and communities be kind

says. Then, compassion is possible, she says. We can listen better, taking on new ideas while holding others’ needs within our thoughts.

Zenner believes practicing mindfulness as a family has given her kids language regarding their emotions.

“This sharing creates an opportunity for all of us to be accountable for our behaviors. Better yet, mindfulness shows us that we can change our behaviors,” she says.

“It’s less about getting it right every time — sometimes I yell — it’s more about this growth mind-set. I (and my kids) can develop skills, and change is possible.”

Parents first

While mindfulness programs for students have been integrated into many schools, many experts feel it’s most effective to teach these practices to parents and teachers first.

“I’m all for teaching kids how to regulate their emotions. But we need to think about systematic change, and that starts with us, not the kids,” says psychologist Mark. T. Greenberg, the

Bennett Endowed Chair in Prevention Research at Penn State University. Greenberg cowrote one of the first socialemotional learning (SEL) curriculums, called PATHS (an acronym for “providing alternative thinking strategies”; pathseducation.com), in 1991 while he was a professor at the University of Washington.

A 2014 study Greenberg worked on suggests even brief mindfulness training for parents may improve parentchild relationships. One group of the parent participants (all with children in sixth or seventh grade) completed a standard parenting program; another group received a version of the program that also included mindfulness practices; a third group had information on the program sent to their homes. Researchers wanted to know if adding mindfulness to the program would increase its improvement of family life. Parents learned how to do short reflections, how to listen more deeply and how to find compassion for themselves and their children. The mindfulness did enhance the effects of the parenting program. “The teens said it improved the warmth and communication, especially with their fathers but also with their mothers,” Greenberg says.

So, what does mindfulness actually mean? It’s not necessarily a two-week retreat sitting in silence (although a short sitting practice can work for parents and children, Greenberg says). Think simple, daily practices: having gratitude, setting intentions, taking deep breaths to reset yourself when you are emotionally aroused.

As parents, we already know that our children feed off our emotions, says Liliana Lengua, a professor and the director of the University of Washington Center for Child and Family Well-Being (CCFW). “We even may know the most positive and effective parenting practices for our families, but we all are sometimes hampered in our ability to carry those practices out. We are stressed or emotional parentmap.com • February 2017 • 13

feature

Chasing mindful continued from page 13

or reacting with anger. We say, ‘That wasn’t my best parenting moment.’

“Practicing mindfulness can help raise the number of best parenting moments and decrease the ones we are ashamed of, sad about or disappointed in,” Lengua says.

To that end, parents can take mindfulness classes at CCFW that teach stress management, self-compassion and compassion. Lengua says parents who’ve taken the classes, including a mindful parenting class she developed, can manage their stress and their emotions before they try to engage with their children; learn how to have more focused, quality time with their children; and enjoy the time with their children more. Another local mindfulness program is Listening Mothers, an eight-week program offered by the Community of Mindful Parents that helps mothers of new babies reduce stress and increase well-being.

Making mindful families

Teaching mindfulness to kids is all about modeling, says Sarina Behar Natkin, LICSW, a Seattle-based parent coach who has practiced mindfulness with her two girls (now 11 and 8) since they were little. “When a child flips their lid, they won’t choose a [mindfulness] tool from their wheel of choice. You pick something yourself and you do it,” says Natkin. “When you freak out yourself, you say, ‘I’m going to go take a mindful moment for myself. I’ll be back when I’m calmer.’”

Natkin says modeling these practices isn’t about not making mistakes; it’s about making your mistakes visible, verbalizing your discomfort, and using tools to re-frame and calm yourself. Then you can finally fully let go of your 3 p.m. freak-out show.

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This verbalization of your techniques begins a shared family mindfulness language, too. The good news is, the more you practice, the less you flip your lid.

For digital natives, mindfulness might be easier than ever now that tools are just a download away. Try free guided audio and video meditation sessions available from Mind Yeti (mindyeti.com), created by the nonprofit Committee for Children (CFC), which pioneered the widely used SEL curriculum Second Step.

This spring, local digital product design agency Smashing Ideas plans to launch Mind Power, a mindfulness app for kids ages 6 and older. When the app’s Mindful Play session begins, the child’s virtual pet, called a Flibbertigibbet,” is in an agitated state. This character is in a 3-D space; the player rotates the body and smooths out all the angular facets with their finger to ease their Flibbertigibbet’s flustered mood. >>

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feature

Chasing mindful continued from page 14

“Slowly moving their fingertip over their Flibbertigibbet triggers their body’s rest-and-digest response, helping kids regain focus and release stress,” says lead app creator Jessica Barnes, creative director at Smashing Ideas. “Years ago, a speaker I saw asked, ‘Why do we think we are so addicted to our phones?’ It’s a touch interface, and that’s the same soothing feeling you have when you’re petting a cat or dog. That’s what led us to the idea of smoothing out the Flibbertigibbet virtual pet.”

Once the child has soothed her or his pet, the app moves into the Mindful Play Meditation sessions. Kids learn how to master the powers of mindfulness through a progressive series of playful and easy-to-understand stories. “We hope their Flibbertigibbet pet brings them back to learn mindfulness techniques that will last their whole lives. Maybe these kids won’t remember this app 10 years from now, but hopefully these skills will stick,” says Barnes.

aware of others. This ability to put yourself in the shoes of another person brings about the thoughts of wanting to relieve the suffering of others. Some say this arises from having compassion for yourself.”

But not all SEL curricula focus on mindfulness, and, in fact, the two are very different things, says Arlen Levy, a mindfulness educator in Bellevue with Mindful Schools, a nonprofit founded in 2007 with online and in-person courses, content, and a network of mindful educators spanning all 50 states and more than 100 countries. For example, the popular RULER SEL curriculum used in Seattle and Bellevue public schools touches on mindfulness with its Mood Meter, which helps students tune into their feelings, but it doesn’t include deep student or teacher training in mindfulness.

“Mindfulness practice doesn’t happen just like that,” Levy says. “It’s hard, and it takes a lot of time before you start to become aware enough to see change. I’m not against SEL, but I want to make sure when teachers do this, they don’t get confused, because it’s not the same thing [as mindfulness].”

Many teachers are working to integrate mindfulness into their daily work. Kristyn Herrmann works to teach her students self-compassion and the realization that others feel the way they do during a daily 9:30 a.m. mindfulness session at TOPS K–8 School in Seattle’s Eastlake neighborhood.

Herrmann, a third-grade teacher, was one of the first U.S. educators to pilot the Web-based mindfulness and meditation app Mind Yeti in 2015.

She asks her students, “Did anything happen this morning or last night that made your heart race?”

“If they’re comfortable with sharing, this gives them a specific time to be vulnerable with one another in a safe space,” says Herrmann. “The kids love when I share, too. Like about when I was in third grade and I remember how mad I was when my frenemy cut me in line.”

After the kids meditate, they talk about whether they’re still mad or if they feel better, and what works or doesn’t work.

“It’s really counterintuitive for kids to sit still for five minutes, yet my most reluctant student was hooked after she practiced while sitting on the floor. I’ve told them they can squeeze and then release their fists or rub the fabric on their cloths or their ear lobes. Recently, I saw one of my boys who has bigger emotions rubbing his ear lobes while trying to focus later in the day.”

Herrmann believes Mind Yeti’s guided meditations are helpful because the tools translate to life situations. After recess one day, a student told Herrmann a friend was upset when he missed a soccer goal. He told her, “I wanted to let you know Fred* was really upset. I said, ‘Hey, you Although a mindfulness curriculum might feel should take some deep breaths like we do in Mind trendy, Greenberg points out that the SEL program Yeti’ and it worked.” he codeveloped has taught children worldwide Still, Herrmann admits she is the person to practice “doing turtle” for decades. When perhaps most affected by Mind Yeti. Anxious children are upset or anxious, they do turtle by and high-energy by nature, she feels grounded taking long, deep breaths before they and has sought out more mindfulness decide how to behave or respond. He techniques outside of classroom time. feels that mindfulness activities can be “[Students are] going to learn better important supplements to existing SEL if I’m the best, calmer version of myself programs, which many states, including than from the pulled-my-hair-out Washington, now require districts to Take time: Be really present; focus and tune in to your child. version of me,” says Herrmann. Her teach.

“Even 10 minutes can be really valuable for your relationship with school’s 7:15 a.m. staff meetings begin “Through practicing mindfulness your child, and can grow your compassion and understanding of with a mood check-in and meditation, where your child is right now,” Liliana Lengua says. skills in a similar manner that kids too. She’s noticed that as staff members practice math facts, students are learning Let kids lead if they try: Often kids bring ideas home from have increased their mindfulness school, so if they start singing a breathing song or playing a to sharpen their ability to focus their modeling, students have been more relaxing game, join in.

If your kid notices your feelings, including attention,” says Greenberg. unpleasant ones, acknowledge it. willing to buy into this mind-set, too. n It even has the power to help us be

Crisscross, mindfulness pose

Strategies for mindfulness

nicer to each other, from the playground to the political arena.

“There’s also a focus on compassion, caring and kindness. Mindfulness is not just about your own inner thoughts and feelings, it’s also about becoming more

Bedtime reading: Start with The Mindful Child: How to Help Your Kid Manage Stress and Become Happier, Kinder, and More Compassionate or Mindful Games: Sharing Mindfulness and Meditation with Children, Teens, and Families by Susan Greenland.

And check out a great book roundup at mindfulteachers.org/p/ recommended-books.html.

Nancy Schatz Alton is the co-author of two holistic health care guides, The Healthy Back Book and The Healthy Knees Book. *Name has been changed. parentmap.com • February 2017 • 17

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Camp is expensive. Finding a way to cover the many weeks of summer, feed kids’ interests and still have money left for, say, a family vacation is a serious challenge. Many camps offer financial aid to deserving families, so be sure to ask and apply — the earlier, the better. Many also offer discounts if you sign up early. And even if you don’t, you have options.

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Tame the Tears: Parenting Positively with Laura Kastner, Ph.D, Feb. 28

NORTHWEST TREK WILDLIFE PARK

St. Thomas School CampFair, Feb. 4; ParentMap Seattle Camp Fair, Feb. 25

Kids ‘n’ Critters at Northwest Trek, Feb. 18–20

Harlem Globetrotters, Feb. 17–20

20 • February 2017 • parentmap.com

Artifact ID Day at the Burke Museum, Feb. 11

MONDAY POINT DEFIANCE ZOO & AQUARIUM

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Tacoma Resident Free Day at Point Defiance Zoo & Aquarium, Feb. 2 and 23

TUESDAY Great Backyard Bird Count, Feb. 17–20

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Mount Rainier Snowshoe Walk. Explore a snowy white paradise on a two-mile trek led by a guide. Saturday–Sunday through March 26, 11 a.m. or 1:30 p.m. $5 suggested donation plus park admission. Ages 8 and up.

Henry M. Jackson Visitor Center. nps.org/mora The I Hate Children Children’s Show.

Tongue-in-cheek show winks at parents and enthralls kids; it’s not a “boring kids’ show.”

Saturday–Sunday, Feb. 4–26. $18–$25. Ages 8 and up. Hale’s Palladium, Seattle. halesbrewery.com

Community Center Toddler Gym. Seattle’s neighborhood community centers have eliminated fees from drop-in programs such as toddler play times. Monday–Saturday, various times. FREE. Ages 5 and under with caregiver. Seattle. seattle.gov/parks Toddler Time at the Aquarium. Stop by for fishy fun and marine-themed activities.

Feb. 5–7, 26–28; 9:30 a.m.–noon. Included with admission. Ages 0–5 with caregiver. Seattle Aquarium, Seattle. seattleaquarium.org

OrKIDstra Concert: Saddle Up at the OK Chorale. Bremerton Symphony Orchestra plays a special kids’ program, with dance accompaniment. Feb. 7 and 9. $5–$15. All ages. Bremerton Performing Arts Center. bremertonsymphony.org Preschool Playtime. Take a breather and know your kids are having fun at this drop-off program. Tuesday, Thursday; 9–11 a.m. or noon–2 p.m. $10; call ahead or drop in. Ages 3–6. Lynnwood Recreation Center. ci.lynnwood.wa.us

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Story Time and Crafts. Learn about a critter that resides in the Cedar River watershed and make a craft. Select weekends through March 26, 1:30–3:30 p.m. FREE; preregister.

All ages. Cedar River Watershed Education Center, North Bend. seattle.gov/util/crwec Roald Dahl’s Willy Wonka Jr. Last day to enjoy Youth Theatre Northwest’s sweet musical about an eccentric confectioner.

Saturday–Sunday through Feb. 12. $13–$20.

Ages 5 and up. Stroum Jewish Community Center, Mercer Island. youththeatre.org

Monday Cheapskate. Among a few weekly discount ice skating sessions, this one offers free admission to the preschool crowd.

Monday, 9:30–11:30 a.m. $6.84; ages 5 and under free. Sprinker Recreation Center, Tacoma. sprinker.org ONGOING EVENT Early Childhood Art Studio. Dig into paints, crafts, gluing, sculpting and more at this drop-in session. Monday, 10–11 a.m. $10. Ages 2–4 with adult. Kirkland Arts Center. kirklandartscenter.org ONGOING EVENT

Creative Cupcakes. Learn to make frosting and decorate cupcakes for Valentine’s Day in this workshop for child and adult pairs. 4–5:30 p.m. FREE; preregister. Ages 5 and up with adult. King County Library, North Bend Branch. kcls.org Classical Tuesdays in Old Town. Brighten up your Valentine’s Day with a lovely string quartet. 7 p.m. FREE; donations welcome.

All ages. Slavonian Hall, Tacoma. classicaltuesdays.blogspot.com

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Kids ‘n’ Critters. Bring your crew to visit Northwest Trek’s resident animals and partake in special activities; up to four children, ages 12 and under, free per paying adult.

Saturday–Monday, Feb. 18–20. Northwest Trek Wildlife Park, Eatonville. nwtrek.org Mufaro’s Beautiful Daughters. Two sisters encounter challenges on a journey to meet an African king in this show with powerful original music. 2 p.m. $15. Grades 1–6 with families. Everett Civic Auditorium. villagepipedpiper.org

FREE Entrance to National Parks. Head for the hills and enjoy our state’s beautiful places, FREE today in honor of Presidents Day. nps.org Harlem Globetrotters. Legendary team of super basketball tricksters performs at two local venues. Friday and Monday, Feb. 17 and 20, ShoWare Center, Kent; Saturday, Feb. 18 at Key Arena, Seattle. $25.50 and up; age 1 and under free. harlemglobetrotters.com

Tuesday Play Day. Drop-in play time just for families of children with special needs.

Tuesday, 10–11:30 a.m. Pay-as-you-will admission. Ages 1–6 with families. Children’s Museum of Tacoma. playtacoma.org ONGOING EVENT OmTots Play Gym. Bounce around, swing from the ceiling and play like a monkey.

Monday–Friday, 9:30 a.m.–noon. $12; discounts available. Ages 1–5 with caregiver.

OmCulture, Seattle. omculture.com ONGOING EVENT

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Sunday Public Sail. Bundle up and get out on the water in winter. Rides last 45–60 minutes. Sunday, 10 a.m.–5 p.m. FREE; sign up in person; donations appreciated. All ages. Center for Wooden Boats, Seattle. cwb.org ONGOING EVENT Into the West. A mysterious white horse called Tir Na n’Og enters the lives of a family on the coast of Ireland in this suspenseful drama. Feb. 23–March 19. $22–$40. Ages 9 and up. Seattle Children’s Theatre. sct.org

Meet-up Monday. Meet up with a friend to receive $3 off admission. Monday, 9 a.m.– noon. $7 with discount; adults and under age 1 free. WiggleWorks Kids, Bellevue. wiggleworkskids.com ONGOING EVENT Juggling Club. Learn and practice juggling; all skill levels welcome. Monday, 7–9 p.m.

FREE. Ages 5 and up. Top Ten Toys, Seattle. toptentoys.com ONGOING EVENT

Tame the Tears: Parenting Positively with Laura Kastner, Ph.D. For the kickoff to ParentMap’s lecture series, the author of Getting to Calm and Wise-Minded Parenting shares tools to encourage positive behavior and emotional intelligence. 7 p.m. $25–$30.

The Brockey Conference Center, Seattle. parentmap.com/lectures

THURSDAY

WEDNESDAY

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Children’s Film Festival Seattle. Choose from six different shorts programs today or plan ahead for the pancake breakfast program (Feb. 4). Through Feb. 11. $8–$11.

Ages 2–14 with families. Northwest Film Forum, Seattle. childrensfilmfestivalseattle.org KidsQuest Open for Play! KidsQuest Children’s Museum is now open in its new downtown Bellevue location, with new multi-sensory, hands-on exhibits. $12; under age 1 free. Check website for hours. kidsquestmuseum.org

Groundhog Day. Read stories, make a groundhog puppet and more activities related to Punxsutawney Phil, the furry little guy with a very important job. 10:30 a.m.–2:30 p.m. Included with admission.

Ages 1–10 with caregiver. The Children’s Museum, Seattle. thechildrensmuseum.org Tacoma Resident Free Day at PDZA. City of Tacoma dwellers enjoy free admission to the zoo and aquarium today. Feb. 2 and 23. FREE for Tacoma residents with proper I.D. Point Defiance Zoo & Aquarium, Tacoma. pdza.org

Small Frye: Storytelling in the Galleries.

Stories spring to life with Seattle Children’s Theatre at this first Friday event with art-making session. 10:30–11:45 a.m. FREE; preregister for art. Ages 3–5 with caregiver.

Frye Art Museum, Seattle. fryemuseum.org Free First Friday at BAM. Last free day to marvel at works crafted of metal in BAM’s biennial exhibit Metalmorphosis. 11 a.m.–8 p.m. FREE. Bellevue Arts Museum. bellevuearts.org

St. Thomas School CampFair. Get a jump-start on summer camp planning by meeting dozens of local camp providers.

10 a.m.–2 p.m. FREE; RSVP to be eligible to win prizes. St. Thomas School, Medina. parentmap.com/campfair Kidstock! Edmonds Center for the Arts welcomes families to enjoy local bands, a bilingual show, hands-on play and more.

9:30 a.m.–3:30 p.m. FREE; preregister. All ages. Edmonds. edmondscenterforthearts.org

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9 Let’s Play: The Golden Goose. Olympia Family Theater invites little ones to enjoy live theater made just for them. Feb. 6, 9–11; 10:30 a.m. $5. Ages 0–5 with caregiver. Olympia Family Theater. olyft.org The Snowy Day and Other Stories. See the beloved story of Peter in the snow and other Ezra Jack Keats favorites in a mix of puppetry and live action. Through Feb. 26. $22–$40. Ages 4 and up. Seattle Children’s Theatre. sct.org

Toddler Time. Open-early play gym lets the little ones burn off energy with bikes, slides and toys. Monday–Friday, 8 a.m.– noon. $2. Ages 3 and under with caregiver.

Issaquah Community Center. ci.issaquah.wa.us ONGOING EVENT Conservatory Story Hour. Sit among the lovely flowers for stories and a hands-on project. 11 a.m. Suggested donation $3.

Ages 3–8 with caregiver. W.W. Seymour Botanical Conservatory, Tacoma. seymourconservatory.org

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CulturalFest International Expo. Travel the globe in a day as University of Washington students from around the world showcase their cultures. 10:30 a.m.–3 p.m.

FREE. All ages. Husky Union Building at U.W., Seattle. fiuts.org As Snug as a … Beaver? Learn how beavers build their homes and keep warm in winter. 10–11 a.m. Preregister; $2 suggested donation at the door. Ages 3–5 with caregiver. Lake Hills Greenbelt Ranger Station, Bellevue. bellevuewa.gov

The Art of Rube Goldberg. Opening day festivities for this exhibit include mouse trap gaming and tours of the iconic artist’s works. 10 a.m.–3 p.m. Included with admission. Museum of Pop Culture (formerly EMP Museum), Seattle. mopop.org Artifact ID Day at the Burke. Bring your mystery rocks, fossils, bones and heirlooms to the Burke, where scientists and experts will you help you identify them. 1–3:30 p.m.

Included with admission. Seattle. burkemuseum.org

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Storybook Corner. Cozy up for story time and nurture a love of books in the little ones. Wednesday, 10:30–11 a.m. FREE. Ages 1–5 with adult. Island Books, Mercer Island. mercerislandbooks.com ONGOING EVENT Toddler Tales & Trails. Kids and caregivers enjoy story time and a short nature hike. Wednesday, Saturday, 10–11 a.m. $2.

Ages 2–5 with caregiver. Seward Park Audubon Center, Seattle. sewardpark.audubon.org ONGOING EVENT

Oly Old-Time Festival. Celebrate foot-stompin’ fiddle music and dancing, and participate in free workshops. Thursday– Sunday, Feb. 16–19. Many events free; ticketed events price TBA; ages 12 and under free. All ages. Multiple venues, Olympia. olyoldtime.weebly.com Kaleidoscope Play and Learn. Meet and play with other families. Thursday, 10:30–noon. FREE. Ages 0–5 with caregiver.

Third Place Commons, Lake Forest Park. thirdplacecommons.org ONGOING EVENT

Great Backyard Bird Count. Participate in important citizen science! Tally the birds you see in at least one 15-minute time span from anywhere in the world during Friday– Monday, Feb. 17–20. FREE; register online. gbbc.birdcount.org Mother Goose Goes to the Symphony.

Singing sisters Lisa and Linda lead little ones on an interactive, musical, fairy tale adventure. Friday–Saturday, Feb. 17–18 (four shows). $12. Ages 0–4 with families.

Benaroya Hall, Seattle. seattlesymphony.org

Edible City Family Day with Festál.

Devour cooking demos, dances and crafts from cultures around the world. 10 a.m.–5 p.m. Included with admission; ages 14 and under free. All ages. MOHAI, Seattle. mohai.org Family STEAM Day. Take on a scientific, automotive project or challenge during this third Saturday family exploration. 11 a.m.–4 p.m. p.m. Included with admission. All ages.

LeMay – America’s Car Museum, Tacoma. americascarmusuem.org

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Science Sleuths Workshop. Kids dig into science and math. Today’s topic: kitchen chemistry. 2:30–4:30 p.m. $20; preregister.

Ages 6–12. Imagine Children’s Museum, Everett. imaginecm.org Family Movie Night: The Secret Life of Pets. Plop down on your blankets and pillows for Friday night laughs. 7 p.m. FREE. Film rated PG. Lakewood Community Center. piercecountywa.org

ParentMap Seattle Camp Fair. Browse oodles of summer camp options and ask questions of camp providers. 10 a.m.–2 p.m. FREE; RSVP to be eligible to win prizes.

Safeco Field (indoors), Seattle. parentmap.com/campfair Hilltop Healthy Kids & Family Carnival.

This party celebrates family wellness with carnival games, raffle prizes, music, dance and more. Noon–4 p.m. FREE. All ages.

People’s Community Center, Tacoma. metroparkstacoma.org

Northwest Flower and Garden Show.

Peruse the amazing displays and garden-related wares while the kids do a treasure hunt. Wednesday–Sunday, Feb. 22–26. $17 and up/adult; $5 ages 13–17; ages 12 and under free. Washington State Convention Center, Seattle. gardenshow.com Wild Wednesday. Free admission the last Wednesday of the month with two-item food bank donation. 9 a.m.–8 p.m. FREE with donation. Ages 1–10 with caregiver.

PlayDate SEA, Seattle. playdatesea.com

KRISTIE/PIXABAY

Groundhog Groundhog Day, Day, Feb. Feb. 22

Family Nature Class. Science-based exploration and outdoor play. Thursday–Saturday, 9:30–11:30 a.m. $18 per adult/child pair; preregister. Ages 2–5 with caregiver.

Washington Park Arboretum, Seattle. botanicgardens.uw.edu ONGOING EVENT Lil’ Diggers Playtime. This giant, indoor sandbox is perfect for rainy day play. Monday, Wednesday, Thursday; 9:30–11 a.m. or 11:30 a.m.–1 p.m. $8. Ages 5 and under.

Sandbox Sports, Seattle. sandboxsports.net ONGOING EVENT

Relax, it’s all here.

Enjoy the breathtaking beauty of Washington’s Cascades, superb cuisine, a luxurious spa and accommodations in harmony with nature. Plan your winter getaway at

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parentmap.com • February 2017 • 21

out + about

The art of dance: Step Afrika! makes its Seattle debut at Meany Center PHOTO BY WILLIAM PERRIGEN

Spring arts extravaganza 24 family picks to inspire and entertain

BY NANCY CHANEY

22 • February 2017 • parentmap.com

presents

MINI

MAESTROS An informal concert series especially for children ages 2-8 and their grown-ups!

Fiddler on the Hoof Featuring String Quartet February 12 | 2:30 p.m.

Jungle Jams Featuring Brass Quintet March 19 | 2:30 p.m.

Wacky, Wild World of Percussion Featuring Percussion Ensemble April 30 | 2:30 p.m.

Peter and the Wolf Featuring full Symphony Sarah Ioannides, conductor May 21 | 2:30 p.m.

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Held in Schneebeck Concert Hall, University of Puget Sound, 14th and Union, Tacoma. Arrive one hour early for instrument petting zoo!

(No petting zoo for Peter and the Wolf)

Purchase tickets today: SymphonyTacoma.org | 253-591-5894 Series

161208 Crossroads sponsor: ParentMap Movies 4x5 f.pdf

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From terrific fairy tale adaptations for younger children to thought-provoking plays that illuminate life in different eras, our region’s excellent family arts scene offers a perfect excuse to shelve the devices and share the magic of live performance. Little kids delight in the costumes, songs and interpretations of stories they know, while older kids are inspired by the talent and dedication of young actors and dancers.

We’ve gathered 20-plus spring show picks, from bargains to worthwhile splurges, and from musicals to dramas.

You’re sure to find a show here that will enchant and entertain your family. >> parentmap.com • February 2017 • 23

Better your parenting skills in 4 nights Laura Kastner, Ph.D. Tame the Tears: Parenting Positively “Keen insight into the inner world of children.”

—Marsha Linehan, Ph.D.

Getting to

CALM THE EARLY YEARS

Cool-Headed Strategies for Raising Happy, Caring, and Independent Three- to Seven-Year-Olds

Laura S. Kastner, Ph.D. “Kastner masterfully guides parents through the complex maze of parenting.”

—Yaffa Maritz, director, Community of Mindful Parenting

,cause parenting is a trip!

Learn skills to help encourage positive behavior, and manage dreaded tantrums (yours and theirs!).

FEB 28 THE BROCKEY CONFERENCE CENTER, WEST SEATTLE

, cause parenting is a trip!

Kristin Rowe-Finkbeiner

From Peek-a-boo to Paid Leave: Making Career, Child Care and Family Work Join a discussion around paid parental leave, on-ramping and off -ramping in the workplace, childcare and gender equality.

MAR 28 TOWN HALL, SEATTLE

Dr. Sheela Sathyanarayana Kids, Chemicals and Creating a Safe Home: What’s Lurking Behind the Labels?

Learn about the dangers posed by common household products. Leave with practical tips on how to make your home safer.

Dr. John Gottman Happy Marriage, Happy Family: Using Science to Strengthen Relationships Learn what you can do to have a harmonious and long-lasting relationship from the country’s foremost relationship expert.

MAY 4 TEMPLE DE HIRSCH SINAI, SEATTLE

APR 4 VILLAGE THEATRE, ISSAQUAH

ParentLab ab

The Art & Science of Parenting

INFO + TICKETS: parentmap.com/lectures

24 • February 2017 • parentmap.com

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Spring arts extravaganza continued from page 23

February

Elephant and Piggie’s “We Are in a Play!”

SecondStory Repertory, Redmond Feb. 11–March 5

Soundbridge Seattle Symphony Music Discovery Center, Seattle Feb. 4–5, April 22–23

BRANDON PATOC

Sensory-friendly Concerts

Instrument fun at Soundbridge

Select Seattle Symphony musicians and a certified music therapist join forces to welcome families with children with autism or other special needs for an interactive musical experience. Concerts in this series (which began last fall) include instrument exploration, a chamber works performance, participatory songs and focus on a social skill. Seating options, lighting and volume cater to sensory-aware families. $35 per family. Ages 5–8 with families. seattlesymphony.org

Doktor Kaboom!

Doktor Kaboom! Live Wire!

The Electricity Tour!

North Shore Performing Arts Center, Bothell Saturday, Feb. 11, 11 a.m. and 3 p.m.

The science-tastic Doktor Kaboom brings his lab to life in a captivating stage show.

This time he unravels the history and uses of electricity, covering topics from lightning bolts to currents to conductors, sparking interest in science among young audience members. $10–$20. All ages. npacf.org

Schneebeck Concert Hall at the University of Puget Sound, Tacoma Feb. 12, March 19, April 30, May 21

Symphony musicians invite young families to go on a musical journey, learning about the sounds and roles of different instruments in the orchestra. The final show, Peter and the Wolf, features the full orchestra. A popular instrument petting zoo precedes each show. $7–$10; discounted family packages available.

Ages 2–8 with families. tacomasymphony.org

The Migration: Reflections on Jacob Lawrence by Step Afrika!

Meany Center for the Performing Arts, Seattle Feb. 16–18

Rhythm, energy and storytelling combine as Step Afrika! makes its Seattle debut. This Washington, D.C.–based troupe is the first professional dance company dedicated to stepping, a form of dance that began with African-American fraternities and sororities. This multimedia performance features the works of painter Jacob Lawrence at the 100th anniversary of his birth. $36–$50. Ages 9 and older. meanycenter.org

Little Women

Seattle Musical Theatre, Seattle Feb. 17–March 12

Rosa Parks and the Montgomery Bus Boycott

PHOTO COURTESY DOKTOR KABOOM!

Tacoma Musical Playhouse Family Theater, Tacoma Feb. 11–19

Rosa Parks’ simple act of defiance in 1955 Alabama set off a bus boycott that led to the end of legal segregation on public transit. This moving story follows the life of Parks with powerful, uplifting songs of struggle and shows how one individual can make a difference. $12–$15. Ages 10 and older. tmp.org

Prolific children’s author Mo Willems’ loveable pair of friends, Gerald and Piggie, work through the ins and outs of friendship in a unique and spirited way.

In this story, the “bestus” friends receive an invitation to a party where singing, dancing and laughs ensue. $10; $5 for ages 1–3 for all-ages shows on Sundays. Ages 5 and older; Sunday shows are all ages. secondstoryrep.org

Tacoma Symphony Orchestra’s Mini Maestros Series

Louisa May Alcott’s beloved story of the March sisters comes to life on stage with Meg, Jo, Amy and Beth finding their paths to adulthood.

Amid enchanting singing and dancing, the girls face challenges of heartache, finding love and following their dreams. $35–$40. Ages 6 and older. seattlemusical.org >> parentmap.com • February 2017 • 25

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Spring arts extravaganza continued from page 25

MARCH

Peter Rabbit Tales

Kirkland Performance Center March 11–12

The Jungle Book

Philadelphia-based Enchantment Theatre Company brings its touring production to Kirkland for the enjoyment of local bunny fans. Based on three Beatrix Potter books, this story follows a grown-up Peter Rabbit, Flopsy and Benjamin Bunny on a tricky rescue mission. Animal-like masks, fanciful costumes and original music are sure to charm audience members, young and old. $12–$20. Ages 4 and older. kpcenter.org

The Theatre at Meydenbauer Center, Bellevue March 11–12

Seedfolks

Seattle Children’s Theatre March 23–April 16 MARK GARVIN

They’ve probably seen the movie; now take them to the one-hour ballet version of the famous Rudyard Kipling novel that reveals themes of friendship, loyalty and finding one’s home in the world.

This International Ballet Theatre production is part of a series that brings professional dance to audiences of kids and families. $25–$40. Ages 5–12 with families. ibtbellevue.org

Peter Rabbit hops into hearts at Kirkland Performance Center

When a girl plants a few seeds in an abandoned city lot, she grows much more than a handful of lima beans. Her little garden spawns changes in her neighborhood — larger, more important changes than

Ballet

Evergreen City

Cinderella March 17 - 19, 2017

The Theatre at Meydenbauer Center

One hour and full length performances to choose from!

Tickets: evergreencityballet.org

2017

CAMP FAIRS

FREE!

Featuring camps for tots through teens!

INFO + RSVP:

26 • February 2017 • parentmap.com

parentmap.com/campfair

she could have expected from a couple of plants.

This one-woman production about the power of small acts is adapted from the book by Paul Fleischman. $22–$40. Ages 8 and older. sct.org

Cirque de Soleil’s Luzia might be your spring splurge

Squatch! The Musical

Centerstage Theatre, Federal Way March 24–April 9

It’s a Northwest musical about a Northwest legend, Bigfoot. After Sasquatch is spotted near town, a group of young people set out to find him. Adventure and hilarity await. And yes, the big hairy guy sings. $15–$35. Ages 8 and older. centerstagetheatre.com

Luzia: A Waking Dream of Mexico Marymoor Park, Redmond March 31–April 30

Spring splurge, anyone? Cirque du Soleil’s latest spectacular transports audiences to a surreal vision of Mexico, encompassing nature, culture, myths and music. Different scenes in the show take inspiration from migrating monarch butterflies, hybrid animal characters from Aztec mythology and a demigod of rain. $29–$165.

Ages 6 and older. cirquedusoleil.com

APRIL

To Kill a Mockingbird The classic, Pulitzer-prize-winning novel by Harper Lee centers on life in a small Southern town during the depression. A young girl, her brother and their attorney father face challenges around the racial divisions of the day. Important note: Amid themes of innocence, violence and racism, this dramatization of the novel includes racial epithets of the original text. $17–$22.

Ages 10 and older. rentoncivictheatre.org

A Little Mermaid

Venues in Seattle, Renton, Everett, Kirkland and Shoreline April 8–May 20

StoryBook Theater’s adaptations turn well-known fairy tales on their heads, with modern twists, funny songs and audience participation. Once the

LAURENCE LABAT; COSTUMES: GIOVANNA BUZZI; 2016 CIRQUE DU SOLEIL

Renton Civic Theatre April 7–22

parentmap.com • February 2017 • 27

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Spring arts extravaganza continued from page 27

A Little Mermaid swims into StoryBook Theater

mermaid Sirena strikes her bargain and makes it to land, kids in the audience help decide if she should stay on land or swim back to her ocean family. $15. Ages 3–8 with families. storybooktheater.org

The Secret Garden

The 5th Avenue Theatre April 14–May 6

PHOTO COURTESY STORYBOOK THEATER

In this ethereal musical based on the popular novel by Frances Hodgson Burnett, a young English girl becomes an orphan in India and is sent to the English countryside to live with an unknown uncle. As she finds and tends a hidden garden, the girl herself grows to find her own place in the world, among her newfound friends. $29–$141. Ages 7 and older. 5thavenue.org

Skippyjon Jones, Snow What (& the Seven Chihuahuas) Everett Performing Arts Center, April 15, noon (sensory-friendly performance) and 2 p.m.

Village Theatre’s Pied Piper presents this new send-up of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs with our favorite fearless Siamese cat, Skippyjon Jones, as hero. Along with the seven Chimichangos, Skippyjon battles evildoers in hopes of rescuing Nieve Qué (Snow What) in this adaptation of the book by Judy Schachner. The noon show is a designated sensory-friendly performance; call the box office to reserve tickets. $15. Ages 4–8 with families. villagepiedpiper.org

Presented by Bellevue Parks & Community Services Bellevue Youth Theatre

March 17–26, 2017

Bellevue Youth Theatre-Crossroads 16051 NE 10th Street, Bellevue

2017

CAMP FAIRS

FREE! Advance tickets: $12. After March 13 tickets will be $15.

All seats are reserved and we do sell out. Buying your tickets early is highly recommended.

For group rates and special pricing, show information or tickets, call Sheila Framke at the BYT Box Office, 425-452-7155.

28 • February 2017 • parentmap.com

Featuring camps for tots through teens!

INFO + RSVP:

parentmap.com/campfair

Guys and Dolls

Bellevue Youth Theatre — Crossroads April 21–30

Fishnapped!

Olympia Family Theater May 12–June 4

THISTLE THEATRE

This world-premiere Shady New York City musical is a mystery that gamblers play dice games, requires an audience make bets and try to win the full of sleuths to find the hearts of certain young ladies culprit. A pet goldfish Three Billy Goats Gruff (“dolls”). As a singer waits for her has been fishnapped . . . but at Thistle Theatre man to give up gambling and marry by whom? Join in this tale of her, comedy unfolds. This show features friendship and being true to oneself. well-loved songs such as “Luck Be a Lady” and $13–$19; pay-what-you-can performance “A Bushel and a Peck.” $10–$15. Ages 6 and older.

May 19. All ages. olyft.org bellevuewa.gov

MAY

The Hundred Dresses

Youth Theatre Northwest, Mercer Island May 5–21

A girl called Maddie goes along with everything that her best friend does, including teasing a classmate about wearing the same worn dress to school every day. When the girl in the worn dress then claims to have an expansive wardrobe, bullying and tough lessons for Maddie ensue. $13–$15. Ages 8 and older. youththeatre.org

Three Billy Goats Gruff

Venues in Seattle and Bellevue May 6–28

Using Japanese bunraku-style puppetry, Thistle Theatre presents its comic adaptation of this Norwegian fairy tale. Hungry goats try to sneak past a grumpy bridge troll while other characters, a fish and a water troll, get in on the action. $10. Ages 3 and older. thistletheatre.org

Dreamgirls

Village Theatre, Issaquah and Everett May 11–July 2 (Issaquah), July 7–30 (Everett)

An award-winning Broadway hit, this musical follows the 1960s rise of a girl group called The Dreams. The singing best friends work to find success, encountering drama and hard lessons involved in reaching fame. The production showcases powerhouse voices and a Motowninspired score. $35–$68. Ages 12 and older. villagetheatre.org

Wonderland!

Studio East Training for the Performing Arts, Kirkland May 19–June 4

This modern musical adaptation of the Lewis Carroll classic still centers on a girl who stumbles upon a strangely magical world but features new plot lines about the challenges of growing up. Expect familiar characters such as the White Rabbit but with new roles in the action. $17–$19. Ages 8 and older. studio-east.org

JUNE

Winnie-the-Pooh Musical The Spire, Tacoma June 3–11

Pooh is happily eating his favorite “hunny” in the Hundred-Acre Wood when Kanga turns up and tries to start some trouble. Something must be done and Pooh may have to do it. Bother! $12–$15. Ages 3 and older. tmp.org

Jack & the Giant

Green River College Performing Arts Building, Auburn June 23–July 1

• •

8 ways to save on the arts

1 T he Seattle Symphony’s Family

Connections Program allows kids ages 8–18 to attend most Delta Air Lines Masterworks, Seattle Pops and Untuxed series performances free with the purchase of an adult ticket. seattlesymphony.org/concerttickets/ special-offers/family-connections

• •

2 Kids ages 12 and younger are free at

Town Hall Seattle’s Family Concert series (accompanying adults only pay $5). townhallseattle.org/arts-culture

3 S eattle Public Theater’s youth

productions, held several times a season, are always free to everyone (though donations are welcome). seattlepublictheater.org

•

4 F or every adult ticket purchased for the UW World Series President’s Piano or Chamber Music series, you can add two free youth tickets (ages 5–17). meanycenter.org/events-tickets/discounts

•

5 S everal library systems, including

Seattle Public Library, the Pierce County Library System and the King County Library System allow patrons to check out passes to select museums (Seattle Aquarium, MoPop, and SAM, to name a few) as they would a book.

• • •

6 S eattle-based Teen Tix allows

teens to get $5 tickets at more than 60 Seattle-area arts venues. teentix.org

7 L ook for the preview or pay-what-

you-will shows that (usually) happen early in a theater run.

8 O rganize a group outing to a show

and get a discount as well as the fun of a shared arts experience.

Heavier Than Air Family Theatre Co. puts its own musical spin on the classic story of a boy who climbs a giant beanstalk in search of adventure and riches. $8–$10. Ages 6 and older. heavierthanair.com n Nancy Chaney is a Seattle-based freelance writer and ParentMap’s calendar editor. parentmap.com • February 2017 • 29

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Seattle Art Museum’s lobby draws kids with free artmaking and a surprise mural

Please o t uch

30 • February 2017 • parentmap.com

7 museums that engage kids with free art spaces and crafty-cool programs Story and photos by JiaYing Grygiel

I

t’s wet and it’s cold. You want to get out of the house and show your kids some art. But museums are notoriously no-touch zones, and who wants to pony up for admission only to have a screaming toddler cut the visit short?

But did you know that many Seattle-area museums offer art spaces — some available free of charge — and other programs that encourage crafting, art exploration and sensory fun? We round up some family- and wallet-friendly options in town to brighten up your winter.

Seattle Art Museum

Seattle Asian Art Museum

Admission and free days. $12.95–$19.95;

Admission and free days: $5–$9; kids 12 and

free for kids 12 and under. First Thursdays are free for permanent exhibits (special exhibits are half-price admission). Lobby art spaces are always free.

What to do: The most amazing thing about Seattle Art Museum’s free lobby space is how huge it is. Come in through the entrance at First Avenue and University Street and pay admission only for the upper two floors of galleries (which are tough to browse with grabby children anyway), and the entire lower level is free.

Toddlers will love exploring the toy-filled terrace outside the museum restaurant and climbing the grand staircase punctuated by Chinese marble statues. For school-age kids, there’s an open studio stocked with art supplies halfway up the staircase and a “think tank” at the top where they’re invited to leave a message. Bonus: Look for the wheelchair ramp winding around the think tank — there’s a surprise mural inside.

More fun: If you want to visit the upstairs

galleries with your PEPS peeps or another group, request free community passes on the museum website (www1.seattleartmuseum.org/community/ passrequest.asp).

Info: Open Wednesday–Sunday, 10 a.m.–5 p.m.

(Thursday 10 a.m.–9 p.m.). 1300 First Ave., Seattle. seattleartmuseum.org

under free. Free on First Thursdays, first Saturdays (for families) and second Thursdays 5 to 9 p.m.

What to do: The Seattle Asian Art Museum

(SAAM), located at Seattle Art Museum’s original site at Volunteer Park, is a jewel box of an art deco building. Visit now, because the Asian Art Museum closes in the spring of 2017 for a twoyear renovation. In the Tabaimo exhibit (through Feb. 26), you’ll find eight luminous video installations that are modern takes on traditional Japanese imagery. Even my hard-to-please toddler was mesmerized by “Haunted House,” where he got to wear headphones and watch a periscope scanning a cityscape. We saw a family making hand shadows over the butterflies and dragonflies flitting through another video.

Free Family Day is every first Saturday; and the theme on Saturday, Feb. 4, is Lunar New Year, with lion dance performances and art making. It will be loud (to scare away evil spirits), so bring headphones if your kid might be scared. And wear something red for good luck. Also check out the play room at the south end of the museum, with blocks, dress-up clothes, books and puppets.

More fun: The gorgeous Volunteer Park Conservatory (volunteerparkconservatory.org) is located on the north end of the park, and its free days are the same as SAAM’s: first Thursdays and first Saturdays. Or make the short walk to Lake View Cemetery, where you can see Bruce Lee’s grave.

Info: Open Wednesday–Sunday, 10 a.m.–5

p.m. (Thursday 10 a.m.–9 p.m.). Volunteer Park, Seattle. seattleartmuseum.org/visit/ asian-art-museum

Wing Luke Museum Admission and free days: $9.95–$14.95;

kids 5 and under free. Free on First Thursdays What to do: Located in a beautifully restored historic building in Seattle’s ChinatownInternational District, this museum is dedicated to Asian-American history and art. On First Thursdays, the museum’s free admission day, sit in for toddler story time at 11 a.m., followed by an art activity. Look for the colorful room just for small children tucked in the galleries upstairs. Parents and school-age kids might want to sign up for one of a slew of themed tours that explore the International District (most are additional cost), from “Bruce Lee’s Chinatown” to seasonal food tours such as a dumpling crawl.

More fun: The Wing’s new exhibit, Who’s Got Game?, showcases elite Asian-Pacific American sports stars and local athletes who shaped Seattle history. Find memorabilia and photos, as well as fun activities for kids, such as a pitching game and a cereal box-style photo op.

Info: Open Tuesday–Sunday, 10 a.m.–5 p.m.

(First Thursday, 10 a.m.–8 p.m.). 719 S. King St., Seattle. wingluke.org >>

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Bellevue Arts Museum

Henry Art Gallery

Admission and free days: $10–$12, kids under

Admission and free days: $6–$10; children

6 free. The museum is free on First Fridays, and the first floor of Bellevue Arts Museum (BAM) is always free.

always free. The Henry is free every Sunday and on First Thursdays.

What to do: Bellevue Arts Museum’s ground floor

is completely free. It won’t cost you a penny to see Aaron Haba’s show-stopping mobile in the center of the atrium, the community education gallery and an art activity area tucked in back. But it’s worth your museum dollars to visit the two upper levels of galleries. Each floor has its own “Imagination Station,” where visitors can cut, draw and create, and the activities change with different shows.

New projects for this year include designing a modern quilt square, creating a mini sculpture out of repurposed items and learning about the many forms of glass.

More fun: Almost every Saturday afternoon from 1

What to do: Visit this small, friendly contemporary art museum on the University of Washington campus every Sunday, when admission and parking (inside the UW Central Parking Garage next door) are free. A must-do activity at the museum is to cross the bridge to the James Turrell Skyspace, an outdoor, circular room with a wood-paneled interior and a retractable roof that allows an ever-changing view of the sky. It is incredibly peaceful, like being inside a private fort.

The galleries across from the Skyspace currently feature stunning portraits by hometown hero Chuck Close, through April 2. (FYI, there is nudity in the exhibit.) Sweeten the deal by visiting on the second Sunday of every month (next up is Feb. 12) to participate in a free drop-in ArtVenture program for families.

to 3 p.m., the museum hosts a drop-in “Get Crafty” activity in its lobby (bellevuearts.org/calendar/event/ get_crafty_saturdays.html). You don’t need to pay museum admission, just a small materials fee, to participate.

Suzzallo Library, which looks like something out of Hogwarts.

Info: Open Wednesday–Sunday, 11 a.m.–5 p.m.; free First Friday, 11 a.m.–8 p.m. 510 Bellevue Way N.E., Bellevue. bellevuearts.org

Info: Open Wednesday–Sunday, 11 a.m.–4 p.m.

(Thursday: 11 a.m.–9 p.m.). 15th Ave. N.E. and N.E. 41st St., Seattle. henryart.org/programs/families >>

More fun: Stop by the University of Washington’s

Touch and go: Tips for mixing museums and kids From Michelle Hagewood, assistant curator of school, youth and family programs at the Henry Art Gallery and mom of a 2-year-old daughter: • No matter what age your kids are, have a conversation before going. Give kids a heads-up there may be things they want to touch, but can’t. Talk through the reasons.

• In no-touch galleries, hold hands, put hands in pockets or bring a favorite toy your child can hold.

• Sketching in galleries is encouraged! Bring a little notebook and pencil.

• Make walking through galleries a game. For bigger kids, use brochures as a scavenger hunt. Small children can look for faces, shapes or colors.

From Regan Pro, Kayla Skinner deputy director for education and public programs at Seattle Art Museum: • Keep the visit short and selfdirected. Ask your child what he’s interested in, what he’d like to look at.

• Engage your kids by having them move like a painting or pose like a sculpture.

• You can always bring a stroller in to help corral your kids and keep them moving.

Kids can get crafty at several Imagination Stations at Bellevue Arts Museum

32 • February 2017 • parentmap.com

• Be aware of where the bathrooms and family spaces are for when you need a break.

— JiaYing Grygiel

S C H O O L S Encourage expressiveness in your preschooler How many times have you said this: “Use your words!” Lost count?

Encouraging your preschoolers to express themselves and thus better interact in the world is no small feat. That’s why I banned three words in my household.

Abandoning all the parenting books and studies, theories and online chatrooms which effectively contradicted each other, I struck “stupid,” “hate” and “boring” from the family lexicon. I believed that these particular throwaway words my family, and particularly my young daughter, would randomly deploy masked what was going on inside. True feeling required a meatier vocabulary and I hoped banning these overworked words would help nurture robust language.

Good news: It worked. Over time, I’ve reconsidered and made adjustments, gradually phasing myself out as entertainer. I left her to figure it out. And I’ve seen results for both my daughter and myself.

As a parent, I often feel bogged down by having to enforce all the rules I set up. So I do my best to prune, trimming down because successful parenting hinges on consistency. We have to do what we say or our kids stop believing us. With my early decision to ban just three words, I felt a weird sense of relief, that this was something I could enforce. In return, it was encouraging to watch my child respond.

Three words were doable for both of us. Pick your words at parentmap.com/words.

— Kathryn Streeter

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Chuck Close portraits are on view at Henry Art Gallery

The visual feast at the Frye is always free

Frye Art Museum

Tacoma Art Museum

Admission and free days: The Frye is

Admission and free days: Admission

always free.

$13–$15; $40/family; kids 5 and under free. Free on Third Thursdays, and other discounted days

More fun: The Frye also hosts one of the

best kids’ art activities in town, “Small Frye”: On the first Friday of each month (next up is Feb. 3), kids ages 3 to 5 can watch storytellers from Seattle Children’s Theatre perform in the galleries, then create a project with the Frye’s art educators in the studio upstairs. Cost is free but register online.

Info: Open Tuesday–Sunday 11 a.m.–5

p.m. (Thursday, 11 a.m.–7 p.m.). 704 Terry Ave., Seattle. fryemuseum.org 34 • February 2017 • parentmap.com

What to do: When Tacoma Art Museum (TAM) expanded in 2014, it moved the art studio just off the lobby and made the studio free admission all the time, with easily accessible art supplies and inspiration. “It’s for adults, it’s for kids, everyone from babies to grandmas,” says Britt Board, TAM’s community engagement and studio program manager. While you’re at TAM, browse the other exhibits dedicated to Impressionist and Western art More fun: When your kids are done creating, take a (free) walk farther down Pacific Avenue over the Bridge of Glass (museumofglass.org/ outdoor-art/chihuly-bridge-of-glass) to get your fill of Chihuly. Or play at The Children’s Museum of Tacoma, next door to TAM, where admission is by donation (playtacoma.org).

Info: Open Tuesday–Sunday 10 a.m.–5 p.m.

(free Third Thursday 5–8 p.m.). 1701 Pacific Ave., Tacoma. tacomaartmuseum.org n JiaYing Grygiel is a mama and a photographer in Seattle. She is a career journalist, with a brief interlude at the Seattle Art Museum, and now blogs about her adventures with her boys, ages 5 and 1, at photoj.net

MERRILL IMAGES

What to do: At First Hill’s free art museum, go see the gallery where paintings are hung “salon-style,” like a giant jigsaw puzzle, filling the walls from floor to ceiling. It’s how art was displayed at the home of the Frye’s namesake patrons, Charles and Emma Frye, almost a century ago. The gallery is a visual feast from the ground up.

My two kids and I love to play “I spy,” looking for ducks, horses, boats, flowers — all objects small children can identify in the paintings.

KidsQuest 2.0

Just as this issue was going to press, we heard some exciting museum news for families.

KidsQuest Children’s Museum had set the opening date for its new museum, January 31.

By the time you read this, the museum’s new 13,500 square foot building, located at N.E. 12th Avenue and 108th Avenue N.E. in downtown Bellevue, will be in full swing. Highlights of the new space include a 28-foot climbing structure/ sculpture that will be the centerpiece of the opening gallery, an art studio, maker space, large water play area, an outdoor gallery and a mercantile play area that re-creates historic Bellevue.

KidsQuest is also expanding its educational staff and its classrooms. Expect to see more early learning classes, mini maker classes, after-school programming and art classes. Programming for kids with sensory issues will also continue.

The exhibits and classrooms aim to serve a wider range of kids of different ages and interests — but there is an underlying theme. “The spaces are very intentional in design to allow for deep engagement,” says Jamie Bonnett, associate director of education.

Find out more about the new museum at parentmap.com/kidsquest.

— Elisa Murray

S C H O O L S

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P R E S C H O O L S

To Know and be Known

Educating students students in in aa culture Educating culture of of connectedness connectedness Call or visit to learn more about the King’s community.

Now offering Spanish Immersion for Kindergarten.

Shoreline, WA | Preschool – High School

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S C H O O L S

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P R E S C H O O L S

Growing together in hearts, minds, and spirits • Preschool • Swim Lessons • Before & After School Program

• Summer Camp • Fitness Classes

Enrolling preschool 3’s to 8th grade Schedule a tour today! www.ecswa.org

The Sammamish Montessori School

Nurture in Nature Preschool

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2017 PRESCHOOL OPEN HOUSES are Feb 4, 11am-1pm or Feb 15, 6-8pm

In Redmond

OPEN ENROLLMENT for new students is Jan 1 - Mar 11

Call 425-883-3271 for a tour.

• Child-centered, joyful atmosphere with strong academic focus • Experienced, Montessori-certified teachers • Preschool, kindergarten and elementary • Family owned and operated since 1977 • Summer, before & after school programs • NEW Prep Program, (starting ages 2 1/2-3)

in g N o w E n r o ll www.sammamishmontessori.com • 425-883-3271

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(253) 591-6439 • www.tacomanaturecenter.org

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Rigorous academics that challenge.

Supportive community that nurtures.

Christian leaders that transform.

bellevuechristian.org/visitbcs If you could rethink school, what would it be like?

Preschool - 12th Grade Campuses in Bellevue & Woodinville

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Small class sizes • On-site farm animals • Personalized education Serene 5-acre campus • Project-based learning Infants through Elementary MCHkids.com • office@MCHkids.com • (425) 868-7805 5003 218th Ave. NE, Redmond, WA 98053

1/12/17 4:12 PM

relationships

Love in the age of diaper duty

Four unexpected ways parenthood changed one woman’s marriage

By Ambreia Meadows-Fernandez

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“ Maybe this increase in attraction that results from witnessing my

PHOTO COURTESY AMBREIA MEADOWS-FERNANDEZ

hile in many ways a baby is regarded as a bundle of joy, research shows that children are actually a risk factor for divorce. After having a baby, 67 percent of couples see their marital satisfaction plummet, according to research

by John Gottman, Ph.D., that was published in the Journal of Family Psychology.

Is it any wonder?

Children bring stress, distance and frustration to a marriage or partnership — not to mention lack of sleep and, often, pressures around finances and child care.

It’s hard.

Now imagine how much stress parenthood adds to an already struggling marriage.

But there is hope. Having a baby can improve your partnership, too. Especially if, according to a paper cowritten by Gottman summarizing research that tracked marital satisfaction, partners have a fondness and high regard for each other before the baby comes.

The transition to parenting is tough. I’ve been there. And it turned out that it wasn’t all that bad. Here are four unexpected ways having a baby affected my struggling marriage.

1. An increase in admiration Over the past six years, I have seen my husband, Rico, go through many changes. (Considering that I met him in middle school, I’ve actually been shocked by the many ways he’s grown and changed, but that is another story.)

Watching him shift from a gamer to a dad has been wonderful to witness. Don’t get me wrong, he is still very much a gamer. But I can see his priorities shifting.

He’s more inclusive. Now he sings game theme songs out loud so the baby can dance along. He allows the baby to hold the

partner move into fatherhood is some kind of evolutionary response.” controller to follow what he does. My husband will pause a board game with friends to change a diaper.

Men are not shown frequently in caretaking roles, but times are changing. While my husband is far from being a stay-at-home dad, I see him engage closely with our son as often as he can, and I love him for it. Seeing him in his new role, diving fully into parenting challenges, has been amazing. I love watching him grow, and I love the way those observations have increased my admiration for him.

2. An increase in attraction My husband is fyne. And no piece of information could convince me otherwise. His looks played a huge role in my picking him.

He says I don’t act on it, but those things — physical attraction and chemistry — mean a lot to me.

Few things make him as attractive to me as seeing him as an active father.

An unsolicited diaper change causes me to stare awestruck and appreciate his beauty. He is much more patient than I am, and I am so grateful for — and attracted to — the balance he provides. Maybe this increase in attraction

that results from witnessing my partner move into fatherhood is some kind of evolutionary response. I feel affirmed that I did a good job picking my life partner and my son, Salem’s, dad.

Sometimes it even creates a buffer for all my husband’s annoying qualities — ha-ha.

3. Jealousy We have a musical household. My husband and I will make a jingle out of anything. And occasionally, that jingle involves dancing. Being that my mom is the life of any party, I always assumed I would naturally be the “fun” parent.

Somehow, my 7-month-old missed that memo.

Whose songs does he laugh at the most?

Daddy’s. Who has invented a game called “baby aerobics” that stops crying? Dad. Who look likes twins? Salem and Rico. Salem spoke his first word last week, and guess what it was?

“Da-da.” Don’t get me wrong, I am in love with their bond. And I know Salem is blessed to have such an awesome dad. But I wasn’t prepared for the annoyance I sometimes feel as I watch him instantly calm a baby I’ve been trying to soothe for hours. I am grateful, with a hint of jealousy. >> parentmap.com • February 2017 • 37

SCHOOLS + PRESCHOOLS MONTESSORI SCHOOL OF SEATTLE

relationships

Diaper duty continued from page 37

Upcoming New Bellevue Open Houses Campus

Coming Park Highland Campus February 4th Fall 2013!

10:00 a.m. – 12:00 p.m.

While journeying towards (Preprimary only) academic excellence, we are committed to

Bellewood developingCampus ethical,

Februaryand 9th creative compassionate children.

9:30 a.m. – 11:00 a.m.

(Elementary only) KIRKLAND BELLEVUE To RSVP please visit: REDMOND cedarcrestacademy.org

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Children 2.5 - 6 years 720 18th Ave. East - 206·325·0497 Montessorischoolofseattle.com info@montessorischoolofseattle.com

4. An increase in teamwork

Before baby, I never felt like my husband and I were a “family.”

• Individualized Curriculum, tailored to We were a couple with pets. Every meet the needs of each child disagreement we had, there was his • World Languages side and a my side. We were self• Arts, Drama, Music centered — not abnormal for two • Science and Technology • Gymnastics and Physical Education people who eloped at 22.

MUST-SEE LECTURES • Values Through Character Education Now that our son is here, it feels Managing tantrums, theirs • School Houses and Clubs like we are less free agents and more and yours - Laura Kastner, Ph.D. • Global Community Awareness of a team. It’s funny to say, but we Paid parental leave, gender now have a common interest and a Now accepting applications in select equality - Kristin Rowe-Finkbeiner Preschool - 4th Grade classes for the upcoming school year. common enemy.

Kids, chemicals and a safe We have joined forces to defeat home - Dr. Sheela Sathyanarayana Please BELLEVUE call 425-889-1111 to the evil of dirty diapers, tantrums schedule your personalized tour.

See Happy marriage, happy KIRKLAND and trash eating. Through Salem, pg 24! family - Dr. John Gottman we have learned just how much www.cedarcrestacademy.org REDMOND parentmap.com/lectures stronger we are together. We have a common goal of keeping this strange creature alive. We are a Enrolling Now for 1/17/17 1:58 PM team.

0217_LS_1-16.indd 1 1/17/17 2:32 PM Fall 2017 Marriage is a challenge. Parenting is a challenge. Put them together and there can be many “I quit!” moments.

Despite all the chaos we have been through, I truly believe parenthood has enriched our marriage. And I can’t see myself embarking on this journey with anyone else.

Having a child raises the stakes.

Our baby is a motivation to work together and continue to fight for our family. And I don’t think that is a bad thing at all. n

FOUR

Growing Social and Environmental Awareness 206.605.1866 SeattlesProgressivePreschool.org 38 • February 2017 • parentmap.com

Impulsive yet shockingly well-prepared, Ambreia MeadowsFernandez has a tendency to take leaps and land on her feet. She is passionate about breastfeeding, social justice and her family. A writer as well as a military spouse to Rico and mom to Salem, Meadows-Fernandez is waiting to see what is next in life.

S C H O O L S

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< Degrees & Certificates

P R E S C H O O L S NOW ENROLLING!

< Co-op Preschools < Parent-Child Center

Learning Academy Preschool (2 years) Pre-Kindergarten (3-4 years) Kindergarten Prep (4-5 years) Low Ratios and Small Classes Qualified Instructors Daily Support Card

Enrichment Classes

901 Lenora Street, Seattle

Swimming, Soccer and Active Play Whiteboard Learning

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WEM

4/20/15 8:47 PM

The Whole Earth Montessori School Est. 1986 Accredited by the American Montessori Society

Learn more at proclub.com or (425) 861-6247 4455 148th Ave NE | Bellevue WA

(Open to non-club members)

SWIM SW

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www.wemschool.org

Lessons now available for non-prime time hours. All ages and abilities.

BES

To learn more about our programs, tours, or information on our Open House on January 28, 10am–1pm, please contact us: info@wemschool.org

World Class Aquatic Center Expert Instructors Techniques for confidence, comfort and fun

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WEM: An exceptional academic program... an authentic Montessori experience...

Teaching more kids to swim than anywhere in the Northwest.

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Preschool – 8th grade

LESSONS

IM LES

(425) 861-6274 or aquaticsinfo@proclub.com parentmap.com • February 2017 • 39

B ra nd n ew ha nds-o n exhi bi t s, out d oor space, a n d mo r e !

KidsQuest Children’s Museum

KidsQuest

Children’s Museum

Bellevue Mercantile

Opening Early 2017!

Water Gallery

Story Tree

1116 108th Ave NE • Bellevue, WA 98004 • kidsquestmuseum.org • 425.637.8100