ParentMap April 2017 - East by ParentMap

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note

The ultimate superpower: kindness

f you ever wonder what wins in this world — good or evil — read on. Every year our April issue overflows with people who fill our hearts with love, care and compassion. We call them Superheroes.

Each graces our community with an extraordinary level of what we at

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ParentMap call kindfulness. This portmanteau of “kind” and “mindfulness” highlights our year’s mission-driven content in the series Raising Kind (www.parentmap.com/raisingkind). Our 2017 Superheroes embody kindfulness. On page 8, you’ll find 10 interviews, each beautifully enhanced by the artful photography of our dear,

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talented friend Will Austin. Cuddle up with your special sweetheart and marvel at these “cape-worthy” characters whose stories you’ll want to share again and again (believe me, teaching your children about the character traits of these crusaders will be one great act of parenting). Personally, we

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gardens. Clearly, it’s time to “Book It to These Destination Libraries” (p. 33) with your family in tow. ParentMap goes beyond the page, too. Our upcoming lecture “Kids, Chemicals and Creating a Safe Home: What’s Lurking Behind the Labels?” blends research and advice to arm your family in this continually chemicalsoaked world. On Tuesday, April 4, join us at Village Theatre in Issaquah

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6 • April 2017 • parentmap.com

With that, a quick thank you to our amazing team for their endless brilliance and dedication as they’ve brought you ParentMap for 14 years. And a special shout-out to our celebrated hedgehog, Emily Johnson, who has artfully produced every print issue of ParentMap since we launched in April 2003. With gratitude, WILL AUSTIN

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.com/golden-teddy.

ParentMap

April 2017, Vol. 15, No. 4 PUBLISHER/EDITOR Alayne Sulkin

EDITORIAL MANAGING EDITOR Elisa Murray ASSOCIATE EDITOR Elisabeth Kramer CALENDAR EDITOR Nancy Chaney OUT + ABOUT ASSISTANT Jessica Plesko PROOFREADER Sunny Parsons CONTRIBUTORS

Gemma Alexander, Nancy Schatz Alton, Will Austin, Maegen Blue, JiaYing Grygiel, Rebecca Hill, Malia Jacobson, Annie Kuo

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Our readers’ choices for best camps, pizza, dentists, parks and more!

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parentmap.com • April 2017 • 7

superheroes

The world could use a

superhero We’ve got 10 Photos by Will Austin

8 • April 2017 • parentmap.com

Read more at www.parent map.com/ superheroes 2017

very year at ParentMap, we honor cape-worthy community members who prove that you don’t need special powers to make a difference. Compiling this list is hard work but only because

there are so many qualified candidates. Other than that, it’s one of the most energizing efforts of our year. We hope you also feel inspired as you read about police officers and activists, lawyers and doormen, moms and dads who, no matter their situations, work to effect positive change. It’s a goal that’s particularly top of mind in the midst of our year-long conversation, Raising Kind. As we announced in our March print issue, Raising Kind explores how families and schools can nurture empathy, mindfulness and kindness — three distinctively human, but no less super, traits (www.parentmap.com/raisingkind). These superheroes are the embodiment of these traits, so read on and get your dose of motivation mojo. Thank you, Superheroes! >> Editor’s note: Join ParentMap on a yearlong conversation to explore how families and schools can nurture empathy, mindfulness and kindness. Sponsored by the Community

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parentmap.com • April 2017 • 9

superheroes

The nurturer Krista Linden

EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR OF STEP BY STEP

“

The early-

t a former flower farm in the heart of the Puyallup morning time is Valley, Krista Linden grows families. As founder and executive director of the nonprofit Step By Step my sanctuary. (stepbystepnews.org), Linden helps at-risk pregnant women welcome Plus, I have so healthy babies into loving environments. She and her team currently serve nearly 1,500 clients annually, with plans in the much to do. works to expand the organization’s reach. Linden first imagined an organization like Step By Step when she was a student teacher in Minnesota. She met a young girl affected by early parental neglect and substance abuse, and knew she wanted to do work that helped women in need. The biggest misconception about her job is that it’s a role she walked into, Linden says. People often don’t realize she created the whole organization while balancing the demands of raising seven daughters. Most people also don’t see the struggles behind the scenes, such as when Linden received emergency treatment for cancer during her last pregnancy. (She is approaching 10 years as a survivor.) Linden credits her loving upbringing on a rural Colorado farm for the tenacity and grit that gets her through difficult times. She started Step By Step with the dream of giving every child that kind of foundation. Step By Step clients come from all walks of life, but many are young, single women living in Pierce, King and Snohomish counties who’ve experienced domestic violence, abuse or addiction. Through Step By Step, they receive home visits from the team’s counselors, nurses and dietitians. The nonprofit also offers other services, ranging from rides to doctor’s appointments to help enrolling in education programs to assistance in finding housing. Her team Krista members go to their clients, says Linden. It’s those conversations on living room Linden with couches that makes their work different. Tarita Something else that’s different: the organization’s headquarters. Linden purchased and the Van Lierop Bulb Farm in 2015 as a nod to her Colorado upbringing. She still keeps 4-yearfarmer’s hours; “The early-morning time is my sanctuary. Plus, I have so much to do.” old Mia That to-do list currently includes turning the grounds of the farm into the Germaine Korum Center for Women and Children. Scheduled to be finished in 2018, the center will include an event space, restaurant and classrooms. There may also be a What book saved you or changed your life? manufacturing site for baby boxes — sturdy cardboard boxes filled with baby-care StrengthsFinder 2.0 by Tom Rath. He says, ‘You can’t be essentials and lined with mattresses so that the box can become a baby’s first bed. All of anything you want to be, but you can be a lot more of these ventures will provide jobs for current and former clients. who you were meant to be.’ Linden is quick to share the credit for her success with her team and her husband, If you could have one superpower, what adding, “He always encouraged me to pursue my dreams, and was there for our girls. I would it be? definitely couldn’t have done any of this without him.” To be in multiple places at once. She has faith in the potential of every child and family: “We do it all step by step.” — Maegen Blue

”

10 • April 2017 • parentmap.com

The guardian Adrian Z. Diaz

POLICE SERGEANT, SEATTLE POLICE DEPARTMENT

“

drian Z. Diaz knows Seattle’s neighborhoods better than most. A 20-year veteran of the Seattle Police Department (SPD), he oversees I try to help kids SPD’s Community Outreach Program. That make the positive means he’s enmeshed in the work of improving outcomes for Seattle youth, from coordinating grassroots changes and projects to facilitating national policy work. positive choices, Diaz discovered his passion for outreach work far outside Seattle’s city limits. While on a SPD trip to Peru in 2004, creating programs he saw firsthand the vital role Peruvian police played in keeping youth out of the country’s drug trade. His realization that connect, so — that effective police work must remain closely tied to a that we’re a part community’s culture — inspired a new mission upon returning to Seattle. He sought opportunities to introduce youth to police of the community, work, including through Explorers, a youth police training program he took over in 2009 and still oversees. By 2014, the not apart from the number of youth participating in Explorers had expanded by community. nearly sixfold, says Diaz. Giving youth the opportunity learn about police work helps them see officers as allies rather than adversaries, he says. “We are experiencing a great divide in this country, a divide that can start to come together through understanding and conversation. It is more important than ever to learn from each other and to help solve our issues together.” To that end, Diaz is active in national initiatives such as My Brother’s Keeper, Cities United and the National Forum on Youth Violence, along with Seattle programs that include the Seattle Youth Violence Prevention Initiative and Seattle Police Department’s Micro Community Policing Plans. But the married father of two isn’t behind a desk all day. His favorite work is to help build connections between police officers and the citizens they serve. “I try to help kids make the positive changes and positive choices, creating programs that connect, so that we’re a part of the community, not apart from the community.” — Malia Jacobson

”

What did you want to be when you grew up? I never had an inkling of police work; I have a martial arts background and coached wrestling for 15 years. I love judo and kickboxing — being on the mat helps build discipline into my life.

What’s the most misunderstood part of your job? As police officers, we don’t sometimes understand the problems faced by members of our communities, and sometimes the community doesn’t understand the difficulties of our job. A big part of what I do is to create dialogues to help people understand one another.

If you could have one superpower, what would it be and why? I’d want the ability to stop time. As parents and as police officers, we have very little time to make decisions.

parentmap.com • April 2017 • 11

superheroes

The caregivers

Angela Tucker and Anne Bryson Doyle

AMARA PARENTING AND ADOPTION SERVICES STAFF AND BOARD

“ ”

We’re recognizing that adoption is a lifelong journey.

he life of a foster child can be one of continual transition, says Anne Bryson Doyle. She would know. Bryson Doyle is an adoptive parent and member of the board of directors for Amara, a Seattle-based agency focused on placing children into foster and permanent homes. Bryson Doyle, alongside fellow 2017 Superhero and Amara post-adoption program manager Angela Tucker, seek to create permanence in a world that can feel anything but stable to a foster child. The foster care system is a transient one; a quarter of foster children move five times while in foster care, according to Amara. Each time, they lose about six months of academic progress. Both Tucker and Bryson Doyle know firsthand the importance of a stable home life. After her mom’s death from pancreatic cancer, then 14-year-old Bryson Doyle couch-surfed for four years. Her experience with teenage homelessness fed her drive to establish a stable home for children in need; she adopted her first child, a boy who’s now 16, from foster care in 2004 with her ex-wife. Now that Bryson Doyle has remarried, her family includes eight children ranging in age from 8 to 16 — seven of whom she adopted from foster care.

What did you want to be when you grew up? AT: The first black female president; I wanted to see black people in powerful roles.

What’s the most misunderstood part of your job? AT: The myths about what it takes to be a foster parent: that the kids are damaged, that it costs a lot of money, that it’s just too difficult to parent a child who has experienced trauma.

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Amara is like an “Amara is like an extended family for these kids, to help them have the permanence that they need,” says Bryson Doyle. Tucker was just barely a year old when she was adopted through foster care by a white family in Bellingham; that family eventually expanded to seven children, six of whom were adopted from foster care. Tucker embarked on an emotional search for her birth parents in 2012, chronicled in the 2013 independent film Closure. Finding a career in the field was a natural fit, says Tucker. In her current role at Amara, she helps smooth the transition for kids between foster care, adoption and a permanent home with services that include a mentorship program that pairs adoptees with adults who were adopted. “After the finalization of an adoption, supportive resources can be tough to access. Amara is working to change that,” she says. “We’re recognizing that adoption is a lifelong journey.” — Malia Jacobson

extended family for these kids, to help them have the permanence that they need.

”

On a rainy Pacific Northwest morning, what gets you motivated and out of bed? ABD: I have eight kids — I can’t stay in bed! Anne Bryson

If you could have one superpower, what would it be and why?

Doyle with two of her children,

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parentmap.com • April 2017 • 13

superheroes

The autism advocate Arzu Forough

PRESIDENT AND CEO, WASHINGTON AUTISM ALLIANCE AND ADVOCACY

“

hen Arzu Forough’s family moved to Washington in 2006, she knew her two sons would benefit from the University of Washington’s I would love to be Autism Center. But Forough soon able to either be realized her health insurance didn’t cover her sons’ medically necessary therapies. invisible or read “Our out-of-pocket expenses were around $4,000 a month,” says Forough, who knew her family’s situation minds. Often, we wasn’t unique. “I knew there were thousands of families need to understand in similar situations.” She decided to change that. By 2011, this gentle-mannered mover and shaker had the other person’s helped convince the Washington State Legislature to protect students with autism and other developmental perspective and disabilities. Her wins include a new training requirement be open-minded for teachers who work with students with autism and a Medicaid waiver that brings intensive in-home behavior so we can build supports to children in need. consensus. But Forough’s work is far from done. Inspired by the amount of need she saw — more than 800 families contacted her in 2010 alone— Forough created the nonprofit Washington Autism Alliance and Advocacy (WAAA; washingtonautismadvocacy.org) in 2012. WAAA helps children and adults with autism spectrum disorder (ASD) and developmental disabilities to thrive in their own communities, so that families don’t have to relocate to receive medically necessary benefits, Forough says. Since its founding, WAAA has helped thousands of Washingtonians access insurance benefits that allow them to get medically necessary care. The nonprofit helps 2,800 new families every year, and in 2015, helped pass a state policy that regulates the seclusion and restraint of students, including those with disabilities, in nonemergency situations. Forough is excited to keep expanding WAAA’s reach so that more families can receive the support they need. “The education experience continues to be difficult for a lot of students at different ends of the spectrum,” she says. “Our hope is to address that in a more robust way throughout our state.” — Nancy Schatz Alton

”

Arzu Forough with son Shayan Forough

What advice would you give a new parent of a child diagnosed on the spectrum?

What do you wish people knew about those who are on the spectrum?

Your child is the same wonderful child today who they were before you

I don’t think the general public knows how difficult it is to be in the

suspected autism or received a diagnosis. Although they need more

body of a person with autism, what sensory bombardment feels like.

support, they have the same needs as typical children, like friendship

There’s a reason why people are not looking you in the eye, why they

and belonging.

might cover their ears or making noise to drown out noise.

14 • April 2017 • parentmap.com

The grief expert Jen McCormick

CLINICAL DIRECTOR, THE HEALING CENTER

“

fter years spent working in the adult mental health field, Jen McCormick found a new calling at summer camp. It was 2006 and she was You see a change volunteering at Camp Erin, an overnight weekend camp held in Carnation, Washington, for kids and over time with teens grieving the death of a loved one. grieving kids and “I knew I wanted to do something difficult and meaningful,” McCormick recalls of the time. At Camp Erin, she discovered adults.There’s always a desire to work with those grappling with one of life’s greatest challenges. “You see a change over time with grieving kids and transformation. adults,” she says. “There’s always transformation.” Seven years after her trip to Camp Erin, McCormick became the clinical director of The Healing Center (healingcenterseattle.org), a Seattle-based grief support community. While her experience — McCormick has a master’s in social work from the University of Washington as well as a background in psychological trauma — made her a natural fit, Cindy Burdell, The Healing Center’s executive director, says it’s McCormick’s deep interest in the welfare of clients that makes her an effective leader. Those who work alongside her also treasure McCormick’s sense of humor and focus on inclusion. “She brings her full self to meet everyone, no matter who you are,” says Emily Rock, a volunteer at The Healing Center. The Healing Center works with more than 400 people of all ages who’ve experienced the death of a loved one, and offers support groups including for children and for people who’ve lost someone to suicide. McCormick says she strives to make The Healing Center feel like a safe, comfortable environment. Tucked into the Ravenna neighborhood, the center is in a former private home, with the attic converted into a kids’ space, complete with a foosball table, stuffed animals and an art room. “The main philosophy of the center idea is to get people in a room together that understand what they are all going through,” McCormick says. “Outside of here, they may not be able to talk about it.” — Nancy Schatz Alton

”

When people go through great losses, how can those around them help? The answer to that is nobody knows what to do and that’s OK. Be honest and say, ‘I don’t know what to do, but I want to support you.’ Offer concrete things you can do for the person: ‘I will take your kids to school, help with paperwork and legal stuff or I can be on your 3 a.m. call list.’ Keep showing up over time, especially on birthdays and anniversaries.

If you could have one super power, what would it be and why? I’d want arms that stretch like Stretch Armstrong so I can grab things without getting up. I could sit on the couch and read to my children while my arms are making them dinner.

parentmap.com • April 2017 • 15

superheroes

The skeptical scientist Ranae Holland

RESEARCH BIOLOGIST AND HOST OF FINDING BIGFOOT

“

research biologist by training, Ranae Holland is something of a scientific detective. A native of Sioux Falls, South Dakota, Holland was led to It’s up to you to the Pacific Northwest by her drive to discover. Here, the University of Washington grad spent do the research a decade studying Pacific fisheries and conducting field research with the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration and push the (NOAA) and other restoration ecology groups. boundaries of your Then, her inquisitive nature took her down a new trail — Bigfoot’s. As the host of Animal Planet’s documentary own curiosity and series Finding Bigfoot, Holland has spent the past seven years crisscrossing the globe with a small team of Bigfoot seekers. intellect. Holland investigates leads, interviews witnesses and nails down evidence — or the lack thereof — of Bigfoot’s existence in diverse locales, from dark Texan lagoons to lush Brazilian rain forests. So, does she believe in the big guy? “As a scientist, I don’t believe in Bigfoot, because I rely on evidence,” she says. But as a child of the 1970s pop-culture era, she loves the idea of a beastly biped stomping through the backwoods. “My dad and I would read about Bigfoot sightings, and together we’d ask questions and wonder. He never told me what to think. . . . It very much set the tone for my work on the show.” Finding Bigfoot isn’t about issuing an indisputable answer, Holland says. It’s about the thrill of the unknown. The show built a following with families because it champions independent thinking and a love of the outdoors. This thrills Holland, who regularly speaks at schools about her work. Serving as a role model for gay youth is a bonus, says Holland, who identifies as lesbian. “I want kids to know that it doesn’t matter what an expert on TV thinks,” she says. “It’s up to you to do the research and push the boundaries of your own curiosity and intellect.” — Malia Jacobson

”

What book saved you or changed your life? Just before I started filming Finding Bigfoot, I read Last Child in the Woods: Saving Our Children from Nature-Deficit Disorder by Richard Louv. The show gets kids outside, and that’s worth all the months on the road.

If you could dine with anyone, living or dead, whom would that be and why? I’d love to meet John Muir, one of the earliest advocates of the national park system. His activism shaped modern environmentalism, and he’s a big inspiration for me.

16 • April 2017 • parentmap.com

The conductor Ludovic Morlot

MUSIC DIRECTOR OF THE SEATTLE SYMPHONY

“

n Feb. 12, Ludovic Morlot went from a morning of press interviews to conducting a concerto with a world-renowned violinist to winning a Grammy. It’s all in a day’s work for the Everybody music director of the Seattle Symphony. This most recent Grammy was one of two nominations the should feel the symphony received for an album of Henri Dutilleux’s music released by Seattle Symphony Media — a recording label that Morlot launched in 2014. It’s the urgency of live symphony’s third Grammy in as many years. The first was for a contemporary music. orchestral composition commissioned by the symphony titled “Become Ocean.” That also won a Pulitzer. Morlot’s full of plans about how to build on the momentum of all this success. “I want to continue to refine our artistic excellence — that’s a path that cannot be exhausted — and to keep coming up with new initiatives, to invite the best guest artists we can afford and to start touring,” he says. Morlot became the music director of the Seattle Symphony in 2011, after several guest performances with Seattle and a stint with the Boston Symphony Orchestra. Despite the Seattle Symphony’s increasing star power — including a $50,000 gift from pop star Taylor Swift after she heard “Become Ocean” — Morlot is interested in more than renown. “I don’t believe there’s a right or wrong way to experience music,” he says of such ventures. “There is no bad music in terms of taste.” Take, for example, the symphony’s regular free performances in prisons and community centers, partnerships with local musicians and daytime family-centric interactive concerts — all in addition to the symphony’s more traditional evening performances. Most recently, the symphony performed a free concert titled “Music Beyond Borders: Voices from the Seven,” which featured music from the seven countries listed in President Donald Trump’s Jan. 27 executive order on immigration. The idea came from performers in the symphony, a quarter of whom are immigrants, says Morlot. “We focused on what can come out artistically from opening our hearts,” he says of “Music Beyond Borders.” “A lot of our community members walked into a concert hall for the first time that day. It was one more opportunity to communicate the power of music.” — Gemma Alexander

”

What’s the most misunderstood part of your job? The study. Conducting is not unlike playing an instrument. But moving your arms around — people don’t think it requires as much preparation.

If you could dine with anyone, alive or dead, whom would that be and why? I need to organize a party! There are so many, I don’t want to choose. But I won’t be too serious and say ‘Beethoven’ or anyone like that. I’d love to sit with Roger Federer. I get inspired by how he lives as a performer. But I’m more interested in playing tennis with him than eating dinner!

parentmap.com • April 2017 • 17

superheroes

The change agent Jesse Hagopian

GARFIELD HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER esse Hagopian was a new teacher in one of the most impoverished and segregated schools in America when he looked out his classroom window and saw smoke rising from the Pentagon. It was Sept. 11, 2001 — a day that cemented Hagopian’s personal mission to fight inequality. “What really scared me was how quickly the government could mobilize untold millions for war [in the wake of Sept. 11], but could not pay to fix the hole in my classroom’s roof,” he says. He saw the same skewed priorities when the Great Recession hit. Hagopian, who had returned to his hometown of Seattle after teaching for three years in Washington, D.C., was among the 5 percent of teachers laid off by Seattle Public Schools (SPS) in 2009. “The government spent trillions to bail out banks, but kids, schools, teachers — these were not important,” he says. While unemployed, Hagopian, his wife and their 1-year-old went on a public health education trip to Haiti; the family arrived days before a magnitude 7.0 earthquake struck on Jan. 12, 2010. “We were there for five days before we were evacuated,” he says. The hotel the family was staying at was converted into a clinic; the local hospital had collapsed. “We were breaking chairs to make splints,” he says. “I still struggle to recount and deal with the PTSD from watching people die and seeing children with severe injuries.” The quake’s death toll of more than a quarter million people shouldn’t have been that high, says Hagopian, but weak infrastructure and extreme poverty combined to create Haiti’s devastation. “I want to eradicate the poverty that made that earthquake so deadly,” he says. To do that, Hagopian focuses his efforts on education. Rehired by SPS in 2010 to teach history at Garfield High School, where he himself graduated, Hagopian advises the school’s Black Student Union. He’s also an organizer for the Social Equality Educators (SEE), a Seattle Education Association group that focuses on social justice within the union and in the classroom.

18 • April 2017 • parentmap.com

Jesse Hagopian with former students Marcelas Owens (left) and Alyssa King (right)

“

We need to strengthen public schools to really empower all our students to use their education not just for personal gain, but to transform their communities.

”

“We need to make education less about preparing for the next high-stakes test and eliminating wrong answer choices, and make it more about issues in students’ own lives,” he says. “We need to truly start valuing the diversity of students in Seattle public schools.” With this aim in mind, Hagopian helped organize the Garfield teachers’ 2013 boycott of the MAP standardized test. The boycott eventually included seven other SPS schools. More recently, Hagopian and SEE organized Black Lives Matter at School.

They planned this day of solidarity last fall after threats of violence resulted in the cancellation of an event at John Muir Elementary School designed to dispel stereotypes about black men. In response, SEE planned Black Lives Matter — a day when teachers wore “Black Lives Matter” shirts and taught lessons on institutional racism. It received national attention and inspired similar events. Also, last year, Hagopian established the Black Education Matters Student Activist Award using money he received in a settlement with the City of Seattle (a police officer was caught on video pepperspraying Hagopian at a Martin Luther King, Jr. Day event in 2015). To date, he’s awarded three $1,000 prizes to student activists, with applications currently open for this spring’s award. Hagopian’s ultimate goal, he says, is to motivate students to make change: “We need to strengthen public schools to really empower all our students to use their education not just for personal gain, but to transform their communities.” — Gemma Alexander

People are talking Bachelor’s and Transfer Degrees Running Start

What’s the most misunderstood part of your job? I think the immense challenge of creating a room that respects and empowers all students with abilities beyond what can be tested. Most of what I do isn’t about a score on an exam — it’s teaching them to be more kind and collaborative, and to solve problems together.

On a rainy Pacific Northwest morning, what gets you motivated and out of bed? My kids [Hagopian has two sons, ages 8 and 4] are the biggest motivator, whether literally — jumping on me, demanding I get up — or just their immense smiles. They make me want to get up and see what they’ll do.

“Thanks to Running Start at BC, I knocked out my Associate’s degree within a year.”

Find out why

www.bellevuecollege.edu Bellevue College does not discriminate on the basis of race or ethnicity; creed; color; national origin; sex; marital status; sexual orientation; age; religion; genetic information; the presence of any sensory, mental, or physical disability; or veteran status in educational programs and activities which it operates.... Please see policy 4150 at www.bellevuecollege.edu/policies/.

parentmap.com • April 2017 • 19

superheroes

The opener Gregory Druzianich

ROOTS OF EMPATHY INSTRUCTOR AND PROFESSIONAL DOORMAN

regory Druzianich, known as Dru to the more than 100 residents of BayVista Residential Tower in Seattle’s Belltown neighborhood, has been the tower’s late-night doorman since 2013. A native of Aberdeen, Dru doesn’t just know the names of everyone who lives at BayVista — he cares deeply about them and their families, says BayVista resident John Sabol. “Dru creates community and is deeply empathetic. It’s unquestionably contagious,” Sabol says. Sabol also knows Dru through their shared work at Roots of Empathy, an international nonprofit that works to “build caring, peaceful and civil societies through the development of empathy in children and adults.” At the heart of Roots of Empathy is the local parent and infant who join a Roots of Empathy instructor in a classroom for nine visits. There, students watch as the parent responds to a baby’s struggle and stress with positive coaching and encouragement. This exposure to the As a professional baby and parent’s interaction helps doorman, I also students increase their ability to identify with another’s feelings, which has been function as a listener, proven to reduce aggression. therapist, advisor, Dru learned about Roots because BayVista is the training site for Roots plumber, consultant, instructors. He loved seeing the families friend, acquaintance, come through the lobby. He’d often arrive at work early just to observe the training. bird feeder, confidant, “Dru is a living, breathing example of what empathy is all about,” says Melissa emcee, janitor, real Soltani, Roots of Empathy program estate broker, enforcer manager. “The way that he engages with people embodies kindness, respect and and advocate. Gregory a real sense of caring about others and Druzianich what is happening in their lives.” and Holly — Alayne Sulkin Leupold

“

What did you want to be when you grew up? A professional baseball player.

What’s the most misunderstood part of your job? As a professional doorman, I also function as a listener, therapist, advisor, plumber, consultant, friend, acquaintance, bird feeder, confidant, emcee, janitor, real estate broker, enforcer and advocate.

20 • April 2017 • parentmap.com

”

On a rainy Pacific Northwest morning, what gets you motivated and out of bed? I’m motivated to get out of bed and not go too much further than my viewing chair where I meditate, drink tea, answer emails, listen to music and watch the weather until the rain stops, the pavement dries and then I roll out for a solo, three- to four-hour bicycle ride.

The defender Annie Lee

EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR OF TEAMCHILD ong before she had a teenager of her own, attorney Annie Lee defended the rights of young people. As executive director of TeamChild, an organization that provides free legal aid to youth in King, Pierce, Spokane and Yakima counties, Lee helps defend educational access and basic rights for hundreds of teens every year. She describes her work as primarily preventive. “Juvenile court involvement is a red flag of something else going on — problems at school or at home,” she says. “We want to help overcome those root causes of court involvement to help prevent youth from being involved in the juvenile justice system at all.” Lee helped pilot TeamChild’s program in 1995 and moved to Seattle to join the organization as a staff attorney in 1997; she’s been executive director since 2001. TeamChild has fielded more than 1,300 referrals and served approximately 10,000 Washington low-income youth, mostly between the ages of 12 and 18. Access to education is a vital step toward lifelong success, and TeamChild helps protect that right, says Lee, who’s the mom of a 17-year-old and a 6-year-old. Often when a student gets expelled from school, a family needs help navigating the legal and educational systems to get their kid back into class. Perhaps the student has an underlying learning disability, the family is in the midst of a housing crisis, or there’s another reason behind the student underperforming or acting out. Making matters worse, Lee says, parents may not always be aware of the student’s rights or the programs available to help. That’s where TeamChild can make a difference. Lee’s team facilitates interventions, such as educational support services and individualized legal advice, which can help drastically reduce the number of youth who wind up involved in the court system, she says. “We’re poised to scale our services to reach more kids each year,” Lee adds. “With increased capacity, we can intervene earlier in the cycle to help prevent a downward spiral.” TeamChild’s staff attorneys are problem solvers, says Lee. “Families lead us in the direction they want to go,” she says. “Teenagers are great clients; they’re developing. They have a lot to contribute and they’re open to advice. We help them be their own advocates.” — Malia Jacobson

“

We’re poised to scale our services to reach more kids each year. With increased capacity, we can intervene earlier in the cycle to help prevent a downward spiral.

”

If you could dine with anyone, living or dead, whom would that be and why? My parents were both big influences on me, and I’d want to dine with my dad, Ming Lee. He passed away when I was in college, and I’d love to fill him in on my career.

parentmap.com • April 2017 • 21

SUNDAY

PICKS

MONDAY “Kids, Chemicals and Creating a Safe Home: What’s Lurking Behind the Labels?,” ParentMap lecture with Dr. Sheela Sathyanarayana, Issaquah, April 4

Seattle Cherry Blossom and Japanese Cultural Festival, April 21–23

TUESDAY INTERNATIONAL CHILDREN’S FRIENDSHIP FESTIVAL

april

PATRICK HAGERTY

International Children’s Friendship Festival, Seattle, April 15–16

Washington State Spring Fair, Puyallup, April 20–23

Passover Craft and Story Time. Join PJ Library for some pre-Passover kiddie fun. 11 a.m.–noon. FREE. Ages 1–6 with families. Bikur Cholim-Machzikay Hadath, Seattle. jewishinseattle.org The Little Mermaid. A mermaid longs for life on land and learns important lessons in this fun, song-and-dance retelling of the classic tale. Through April 9. $10–$15. Ages 3 and up. Bellevue Youth Theatre– Crossroads. bellevuewa.gov

Seattle Center Whirligig! It’s the bouncyhouse playground of kids’ dreams, plus balloon artists, face-painting and more. Daily through April 16, 11 a.m.–6 p.m. $8/ day pass; $4.50/toddler zone; $1.50/single ride; Thursdays FREE. Ages 12 and under. Seattle Center Armory. seattlecenter.com Spring Break Superstars. Celebrate the zoo’s “superstar” species — sharks, red wolves, polar bears and more. Monday–Friday, April 3–7. Included with admission. Point Deﬁance Zoo & Aquarium, Tacoma. pdza.org

Kids, Chemicals and Creating a Safe Home: What’s Lurking Behind the Labels? Join Dr. Sheela Sathyanarayana for a ParentMap lecture about the latest research on the chemical substances our children encounter. Leave with practical tips on making your home safer. 7 p.m. $25. Village Theatre, Issaquah. www.parentmap.com/lectures

COURTESY PACIFIC SCIENCE CENTER

Terracotta Warriors opens at Paciﬁc Science Center, Seattle, April 8

BEN SCHERJON/PIXABAY

Kelsey Creek Sheep Shearing, Bellevue, April 29 Skagit Valley Tulip Festival, April 1–30

Marine Mammal Mania. Visit the Aquarium during spring break for special activities honoring our marine cousins, such as orcas and otters. April 7–16. Included with admission. Seattle Aquarium. seattleaquarium.org Monday Cheapskate. Among a few weekly discount sessions, this one oﬀers free admission to the preschool crowd. Monday, 9:30–11:30 a.m. $6.84; ages 5 and under free. Sprinker Ice Arena, Tacoma. co.pierce.wa.us ONGOING EVENT

The Art of Rube Goldberg. Explore the iconic works of the artist MoPop calls “equal parts clever satirist and zany designer.” Daily, 10 a.m.–5 p.m. Included with admission. Museum of Pop Culture, Seattle. mopop.org Opening Day 5K. Mark the start of the Tacoma Rainiers’ baseball season with a family run/walk and game afterward. 6 p.m. $25–$35 includes 5K entry and ticket to game. Cheney Stadium, Tacoma. metroparkstacoma.org

International Children’s Friendship Festival. Kids perform dances and music from around the world to foster crosscultural understanding. Saturday–Sunday, April 15–16. FREE. Seattle Center Fisher Pavilion. childrensfest.tacawa.org Easter Express. Book early for a steam train ride plus egg hunt and visit with the Easter Bunny. Saturday–Sunday, April 15–16. $25–$45; ages 2 and under free. Mt. Rainier Railroad and Logging Museum, Elbe. mtrainierrailroad.com

Lil’ Diggers Playtime. Kids play at the “beach” on a soggy spring day. Monday, Wednesday, Thursday; 9:30–11 a.m. or 11:30 a.m.–1 p.m. $8. Ages 5 and under with adult. Sandbox Sports, Seattle. sandboxsports.net ONGOING EVENT Low-sensory Play Time. This special play time features a limited number of participants and a calm environment. Monday, Thursday; noon–2 p.m. $20; preregister. Ages 0–10 with adult. Roo’s World of Discovery, Kirkland. roosworldofdiscovery.com ONGOING EVENT

Escape from Egypt – Shalom Baby Meetup. Bring your bundle and join a Stroum Jewish Community Center instructor for a Passover ﬁtness session. 10:30–11:30 a.m. FREE. Adults with infants. Gasworks Park, Seattle. sjcc.org Becka’s Studio Activity. Last week to create driftwood sculpture and do other activities related to an exhibit at Tacoma Art Museum. April 1–25. Pay-as-you-will admission and free passes to TAM. Ages 0–8 with families. Children’s Museum of Tacoma. playtacoma.org

Washed Ashore: Art to Save the Sea Grand Opening. Saturday–Sunday, April 22–23. Included with admission. Point Deﬁance Zoo & Aquarium, Tacoma. pdza.org

Early Childhood Art Studio. Dig into paints, crafts, gluing, sculpting and more. Monday, 10–11 a.m. $10; preregister. Ages 2–4 with adult. Kirkland Arts Center. kirklandartscenter.org ONGOING EVENT PlayDate FREE Night. Free admission to PlayDate SEA on Monday evenings. Tip: there are grown-up drinks for sale. Monday, 5–8 p.m. Ages 1–10 with adult. PlayDate SEA, Seattle. playdatesea.com ONGOING EVENT

Preschool Playtime. Take a breather while the kids play at this drop-oﬀ program. Tuesday, Thursday; 9–11 a.m. or noon–2 p.m. $10; call ahead or drop in. Ages 3–6. Lynnwood Recreation Center. ci.lynnwood.wa.us Boardwalk Stroll at Shadow Lake Bog. Grab your boots for a half-mile walk through this fascinating bog preserve. Daily during daylight hours. FREE; donations accepted. Shadow Lake Nature Preserve, Renton. shadowhabitat.org

Second Sunday at Morse Wildlife Preserve. Explore this wonderful land preserve, perfect for a family nature stroll and open only a handful of dates per year. 10 a.m.–6 p.m. FREE. Graham. tahomaaudubon.org Mercer Slough Family Ranger Hike. Go on a kid-oriented 1.5-mile walk through this fantastic in-city wetland area. 2–3 p.m. FREE; RSVP requested. Mercer Slough Environmental Education Center, Bellevue. bellevuewa.gov

30 Alki Street Scramble. Family teams explore neighborhood checkpoints. 9 a.m. $5–$30; ages 5 and under free. Alki Beach, Seattle. streetscramble.com

22 • April 2017 • parentmap.com

WEDNESDAY

A Seattle Children’s Publication | Spring 2017

For Parents, Self-Care is the Opposite of Selfish As parents, we can get so focused on caring for our kids and families that we forget to fully care for ourselves. But healthy self-care is essential. It restores our energy and patience, and helps us connect to our loved ones. It makes us better parents and caregivers. Self-care includes our physical needs, of course. Are we getting enough sleep, eating healthy, and doing enough physical exercise — including time outdoors in the fresh air? Our nonphysical needs are just as important. Are we choosing activities that make us feel happy and fulfilled? Are we taking time to challenge and sharpen our minds? Are we feeding our need for a spiritual connection? Many of these positive activities can be done

along with our kids. But it’s very important to also have some time away. So self-care often requires asking others for help. If you can join other responsible, reliable parents for childcare swapping and carpooling, that’s a great start.

Grocery Shop for a Good Cause Shop retail stores across Washington state from May 1 to June 15 and you can support Seattle Children’s. Look for products marked with a Purchase a Miracle shelf tag. When you buy Purchase a Miracle products you will be supporting childhood cancer research at Seattle Children’s. to learn more:

Visit www.seattlechildrens.org/ways-to-help/host-sponsorfundraiser/business-company-involved/purchase-a-miracle.

Just say “yes” to grandparents and other family members who are eager to spend time with the kids. And find a regular babysitter in your neighborhood who’s earned an excellent reputation. Many new parents join parenting support groups when their children are infants. PEPS (Program for Early Parent Support) is one local option and there are others. These groups provide consistent friends who can offer support through the ups and downs of parenting. Whether you join a group or not, building a support network is key. Here’s a thought to keep in mind: sometimes, frazzled parents looking for quick comfort turn to easy ‘fixes.’ They may overdo it with food, alcohol, shopping, and screen time — including social media. If you feel worse instead of better after an activity, it’s time to rethink. Be sure your self-care is truly uplifting and fulfilling. You deserve it! (For some inspiring ideas on healthy self-care, check out the suggestions in the link below.) Wise self-care helps us manage daily stress and cope with life’s challenges in a positive way. Bonus: when our kids grow up seeing us take good care of ourselves, they’re apt to follow our example as they age and become adults — and parents — themselves! to learn more:

Visit www.peps.org/ParentResources/ by-topic/self-care.

Safe Storage for Marijuana and Liquid Nicotine Marijuana, marijuana edibles and liquid nicotine for e-cigarettes are dangerous for children. While these products are legal for adults in Washington state, that doesn’t make them any less dangerous for kids, who are attracted to their tempting packaging and candy-like or snack-like appearance. Emergency rooms commonly treat children for serious side-effects of ingesting these products. So adults must keep these items locked up, out of sight

and out of reach of children. Consider using a locking cabinet or safe, or locking pouches or bags. For homes with older kids (who often know or will figure out where keys are kept) consider keyless locks. And if a small child does ingest marijuana or liquid nicotine, seek medical help immediately. to learn more:

Visit www.wapc.org/toxic-trends.

Spotting the Signs of Anxiety in Kids Just about every child has occasional periods of anxiety that don’t last long. For toddlers, separation anxiety is very common. School-age kids may feel briefly anxious before public speaking, an important test, or a music or sports performance. But for kids with excess anxiety, everyday events can trigger anxiety: things like being away from their parents, going to school, socializing, or even going to sleep at night. These children may have frequent stomachaches, headaches, tears or temper flare-ups. And rather than outgrowing these worries as most kids

do, their worries typically increase as they get older. Children with excess anxiety need some special help to cope with their fears. If you suspect your child is suffering with anxiety, talk with their doctor, who can offer insights and specific resources. You may also want to consider ‘Helping Your Anxious Child,’ a ninesession parenting group offered by Seattle Children’s. to learn more:

Visit www.seattlechildrens.org/psychiatry or www.anxietybc.com.

Can We Really ‘Spoil’ Infants by Holding Them Too Much? It’s a common and stubborn myth you may hear from well-meaning family and friends: can you really ‘spoil’ an infant by holding and comforting them too much, especially when they’re crying? No, you can’t. Is a crying infant trying to control or manipulate you? No way. In fact, science confirms that thoughtful, responsive caregiving is exactly what infants need. When we respond to their crying by holding and soothing them, and perhaps offering the breast or a bottle, we’re helping them develop trust — which is a crucial part of their social and emotional development. Crying is the only way newborns can communicate. They are often signaling that they need something basic like food, sleep or a diaper change, but their need for social

interaction is just as strong. Hearing your voice and looking at your facial expressions is a critical part of their long-term socialemotional development and their brains are wired for connection from birth. By holding

and soothing your baby you are helping build their brain! So forget the myths and remember this: when you quickly respond to your crying baby, your baby learns that it can count on you. This is what bonding is all about. And infants who have a strong bond with their parents tend to be more content and less demanding as they become older babies. Crying is normal, but if you worry that your infant cries too much and can’t be soothed, talk with your doctor right away. There may be a physical cause, like acid reflux, that requires treatment. to learn more:

Visit www.seattlechildrens.org/cryinghelp.

Kid Bits

Sleep Guidelines by Age

Introducing Peanut Products to Babies

Playground Injury Prevention

All children need to get enough quality sleep so their bodies and brains can grow and stay healthy. Good sleep habits have positive results on attention, behavior, learning, memory, mood and more. Not getting enough sleep is linked to injuries, obesity, depression, high blood pressure and other problems. How much sleep does a child need in a 24-hour period? Here are the current recommendations from the American Academy of Pediatrics. Infants 4 months to 12 months: 12 to 16 hours (including naps). Children 1 to 2 years: 11 to 14 hours (including naps). Children 3 to 5 years: 10 to 13 hours (including naps). Children and tweens 6 to 12 years: 9 to 12 hours. Teenagers 13 to 18: 8 to 10 hours.

To reduce the risk of peanut allergy, most but not all babies should start having soft foods that contain peanut products. This ideally happens between 4 and 6 months of age, after they’ve had a few solid foods with no signs of allergy. (Talk with your baby’s doctor if your baby has eczema or has had an immediate allergic reaction to any foods; you and the doctor can decide when and how to introduce peanut products.) For most babies, the easiest way to start this food is to mix a small amount of smooth peanut butter in cereal or yogurt. Since whole peanuts are a choking risk, don’t give them until at least age 4. Be sure to read the detailed advice from Dr. Wendy Sue Swanson in the link below.

Active outdoor play is fun and healthy! But each year in the U.S., more than 200,000 children ages 14 and younger are treated in emergency rooms for playground-related injuries. Most of these injuries can be prevented. First, steer your child toward play equipment that’s designed for their age. Choose play areas that have soft material — like wood chips, sand or rubber — under the structures and swings. Teach your child key safety rules: never push others, slide feet first, look below before sliding or jumping down, keep clear of moving swings, remove bike helmets when on play equipment, and never use jump ropes on play structures or swings. And of course, children must always be supervised by an adult.

to learn more:

Visit www.healthychildren.org/English/

Visit www.seattlechildrens.org/

healthy-living/sleep.

peanutallergy.

playgroundsafety.

Quick Tip One single organ and tissue donor can save or improve the lives of over 8 people! Visit www.donatelifetoday.com to register your donation wishes.

www.facebook.com/seattlechildrens www.instagram.com/seattlechildrens

www.twitter.com/seattlechildren www.youtube.com/seattlechildrens

Regional Clinic Locations

Online Resources

• • • •

Visit www.seattlechildrens.org for the following: • Child Health Advice • my Good Growing email newsletter • Doctor Finder • Seattle Mama Doc, Teenology 101, Autism and On The Pulse blogs • Medical condition information • Safety & wellness information • Ways to help Seattle Children’s • Research Institute information

Bellevue Everett Federal Way Mill Creek

• Olympia • Tri-Cities • Wenatchee

Primary Care Clinic • Odessa Brown Children’s Clinic

Main Hospital Numbers 206-987-2000 866-987-2000 (Toll-free)

Heather Cooper is the Editor of Good Growing, which is produced four times a year by the Marketing Communications Department of Seattle Children’s. You can find Good Growing in the January, April, July and October issues of ParentMap and on our website www.seattlechildrens.org. For permission to reprint articles for noncommercial purposes or to receive Good Growing in an alternate format, call 206-987-5323. The inclusion of any resource or website does not imply endorsement. Your child’s needs are unique. Before you act or rely upon information, please talk with your child’s healthcare provider. © 2017 Seattle Children’s, Seattle, Washington.

Classes and Events To register or view more information, please visit www.seattlechildrens.org/classes. A phone number is provided for those without Internet access. No one will be denied admission if unable to pay the full amount. If you need an interpreter, please let staff know when you register. These classes are popular and often fill up several months in advance, so register early. PARENTING CLASSES Autism 101

View more dates online FEE: $45 per person CALL: 206-987-9878 for all locations

WHEN: Thursday, April 27, 7 to 8:30 p.m. FEE: Free WHERE: Seattle Children’s main campus, 4800 Sand Point Way NE, Seattle CALL: 206-987-8080

For youth, ages 11 to 14. Topics for responsible babysitting include basic child development, infant care and safety, handling emergencies, age-appropriate toys, business hints and parent expectations.

For parents and caregivers of children recently diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder who wish to better understand this disorder. The class is also available through Children’s video and teleconferencing outreach program in various locations throughout Washington, Oregon and Alaska.

Autism 200 Series Autism 204: Parent Training to Address Problem Behaviors of Youth with Autism Spectrum Disorder WHEN: Thursday, April 20, 7 to 8:30 p.m. Autism 205: Autism and Police: Staying Safe Together WHEN: Thursday, May 18, 7 to 8:30 p.m.

WHEN: Sunday, June 11, 9 a.m. to 2:30 p.m. View more dates online FEE: $60 per person WHERE: Seattle Children’s main campus, 4800 Sand Point Way NE, Seattle CALL: 206-987-2304 For youth, ages 11 to 15. Topics include pediatric CPR, treatment for choking, and first-aid skills. Students receive a 2-year American Heart Association completion card.

For Boys: The Joys and Challenges of Growing Up

FEE: Free WHERE: Seattle Children’s main campus, 4800 Sand Point Way NE, Seattle CALL: 206-987-8080 For parents and caregivers of children with autism who wish to better understand this disorder. These classes are also available through Children’s video and teleconferencing outreach program in various locations throughout Washington. Past lectures are available online.

Heartsaver First Aid, CPR and AED WHEN: Saturday, May 13, 8 a.m. to 2:30 p.m. FEE: $60 per person WHERE: Seattle Children’s main campus, 4800 Sand Point Way NE, Seattle CALL: 206-987-2304 For parents and caregivers. Topics include how to treat bleeding, sprains, broken bones, shock and other first-aid emergencies. Also includes infant, child and adult CPR and AED use.

PRETEEN AND TEEN CLASSES Better Babysitters

CPR and First Aid for Babysitters

4 locations

WHEN: Sunday, April 23, 9 a.m. to 2 p.m. WHERE: Seattle Children’s South Clinic, 34920 Enchanted Pkwy. S., Federal Way WHEN: Saturday, May 6, 9 a.m. to 2 p.m. WHERE: Pavilion for Women & Children, 900 Pacific Ave., Everett WHEN: Saturday, May 13, 9 a.m. to 2 p.m. WHERE: Overlake Medical Center, 1035 116th Ave. NE, Bellevue WHEN: Sunday, Jun. 11, 9 a.m. to 2 p.m. WHERE: Seattle Children’s admin. building, 6901 Sand Point Way NE, Seattle

4 locations

WHEN: Mondays, May 15 & 22, 6:30 to 8:30 p.m. WHERE: Overlake Medical Center, 1035 116th Ave. NE, Bellevue WHEN: Wednesdays, May 24 & 31, 6:30 to 8:30 p.m. WHERE: Seattle Children’s main campus, 4800 Sand Point Way NE, Seattle

For Girls: A Heart-to-Heart Talk on Growing Up

4 locations

WHEN: Tuesdays, April 11 & 18, 6:30 to 8:30 p.m. WHERE: Seattle Children’s main campus, 4800 Sand Point Way NE, Seattle WHEN: Tuesdays, May 9 & 16, 6:30 to 8:30 p.m. WHERE: Overlake Medical Center, 1035 116th Ave. NE, Bellevue

EVENTS Free Bike Helmet Fitting and Giveaways WHEN: Sunday, April 30, 10 a.m. to 1 p.m. WHERE: Lynnwood Kohl’s, 18405 Alderwood Mall Pkwy., Lynnwood WHEN: Saturday, June 10, 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. WHERE: Seattle Children’s South Clinic, 34920 Enchanted Pkwy. S., Federal Way CALL: 206-987-1569 Come get your child properly fit for a new bike helmet. Kids must be 1 to 18 and present to receive a helmet. First come, first served. Supplies are limited.

Free Safe Firearm Storage Event WHEN: Saturday, May 13, 10 a.m. to 1 p.m. WHERE: Coastal Farm and Ranch, 2021 Market St., Mount Vernon CALL: 206-987-4653 Come learn about the importance of safe firearm storage and get a free lock box or trigger lock, with hands-on training on proper use. Supplies are limited. First come, first served. One free lock box or trigger lock per person (maximum two items per household). Must be present to receive free item. Recipient must be 18 or older. No ID required.

Low-cost Life Jacket Sales WHEN: Saturday, May 20, 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. FEE: $20 for infant, child and youth sizes; $30 for adult sizes WHERE: Green Lake (Evans) Pool, 7201 E. Green Lake Dr. N., Seattle CALL: 206-684-4961 (Seattle Parks and Recreation) Come get custom-fit life jackets for the whole family. The person you are buying the jacket for must be present for proper fitting. Children must be at least 6 months old and 18 pounds to be fit.

Free Car Seat Check

View more dates and locations online FEE: $80 per parent/child pair; $60 per extra son or daughter CALL: 206-789-2306

WHEN: Saturday, June 17, 10 a.m. to 1 p.m. WHERE: Seattle Children’s main campus, 4800 Sand Point Way NE, Seattle CALL: 206-987-5999

These classes use an informal and engaging format to present and discuss the issues most on the minds of pre-teens ages 10 to 12 as they begin adolescence; conversations about body changes, sex, and other growing up stuff. Content outlines and short videos available at www.greatconversations.com.

Come learn how to safely secure your child in the car. Child passenger safety experts will check your child in a car seat, booster seat or the seat belt and answer any questions you may have. First come, first served. No appointments needed.

WEDNESDAY

THURSDAY

FRIDAY

VOTE TODAY!

GOLDEN TEDDY Our readers’ choices for

best camps, pizza, dentists, parks and more! ALLI ARNOLD

www.parentmap.com/golden-teddy 5

Lego Brick by Brick Show. Eye-popping Lego structure displays, hands-on building stations and daily demos by Lego gurus. Daily, April 1–16. $15 or $40 family pass. Freighthouse Square, Tacoma. brickabledesigns.com Children’s Passover Program. Make matzah, put together plague bags and make your own haggadah. 5–6:30 p.m. FREE. All ages. Stroum Jewish Community Center, Mercer Island. sjcc.org

6 Skagit Valley Tulip Festival. Spring is tulip time so head north to see the acres of gorgeous tulip ﬁelds. April 1–30 or while blooms last. Skagit County. tulipfestival.org What the Griot Said: Storytelling with Eva Abram. All welcome to hear the enchanting tales the Griot tells. Noon– 1 p.m. FREE. Northwest African American Museum, Seattle. naamnw.org

SATURDAY 1 Leap for Green Family Sustainability Fair. Marimba music, arts and crafts, farm animals, wetland tour and more. 10 a.m.– 2 p.m. FREE. Mercer Island Community and Event Center. mercergov.org Squatch! The Musical. A quintessentially Northwest musical about our favorite Northwest legend. Through April 9. $15– $35. Ages 8 and up. Centerstage Theatre, Federal Way. centerstagetheatre.com

,cause parenting is atrip!

Pysanky Egg Workshop. Drop the kids and let them create with this decorative folk art from Ukraine. 5:30–7:30 p.m. $25; preregister. Ages 7 and up. KidsQuest Children’s Museum, Bellevue. kidsquest.org Family Bingo Night. Bring your family and your own marker or dauber and win super bingo prizes. 6:30–9 p.m. $5 includes 6 bingo sheets; preregister. Chambers Creek Regional Park, University Place. piercecountywa.org

Family Day at Magnuson Children’s Garden. Celebrate Earth Month digging into gardening, checking out the worm bin and making nature crafts. 10 a.m.–2 p.m. FREE. Magnuson Children’s Garden, Seattle. magnusonnatureprograms.com Daffodil Festival Parades. Wave at the floats, marching bands and lovely Daffodil Princesses in four city parades. 10:15 am, Tacoma; 12:45 p.m., Puyallup; 2:30 p.m., Sumner; 5 p.m., Orting. FREE. thedaffodilfestival.org

Terracotta Warriors of the First Emperor. In this exhibit’s only West Coast stop, walk among 2,000-year-old figures and learn about an incredible archaeological mystery. April 8–Sept. 4. $24.75–$32.75. Pacific Science Center, Seattle. pacificsciencecenter.org Student Wednesday at BAM. Students welcomed to view exhibits for free. 11 a.m.–6 p.m. FREE for grades K–12 with online coupon. Bellevue Arts Museum. bellevuearts.org

Let’s Play: Peter Rabbit. Tots and preschoolers get a fun intro to live theater with shows designed just for them. April 10, 13–15; 10:30 a.m. $5. Ages 0–5 with caregiver. Olympia Family Theater. olyft.org Fire Station 7. Coco the aspiring ﬁre cat works hard to make her dreams come true. Tip: Thursday performances at SCT tend to oﬀer lower ticket prices. April 13–May 21. $22–$40. Ages 4 and up. Seattle Children’s Theatre. sct.org

Family Movie Night. Bring your pillow and cozy up for E.T. on the big screen with free popcorn. 7:30–9:30 p.m. FREE. Film rated PG. Portland Avenue Community Center, Tacoma. metroparkstacoma.org Family Movie Night. Bring your indoor picnic or buy snacks (including grownup drinks) to go with Shaun the Sheep. 6:30–9:30 p.m. $3/person. Film rated PG. Mount Baker Community Club, Seattle. mountbaker.org

Bunny Bounce. Bring your basket for egg-citing spring fest with egg hunts for ages 1–8, bunny encounters and Easter treats for the animals. 9:30 a.m.–3 p.m. Included with admission. Woodland Park Zoo, Seattle. zoo.org Spring Eggstravaganza. Hop in for a scavenger hunt, bunny petting zoo, bouncy house, crafts and more. Noon–4 p.m. FREE. Ages 12 and under with families. Redmond Town Center. redmondtowncenter.com

Wednesday Play Group. Free, drop-in play time connects families for fun and community. Wednesday, 10:30 a.m.–noon. FREE. Ages 0–5 with adults. FamilyWorks Resource Center, Seattle. familyworksseattle.org ONGOING EVENT Storybook Corner. Cozy up for story time and nurture a love of books in the little ones. Wednesday, 10:30–11 a.m. FREE. Ages 1–5 with adult. Island Books, Mercer Island. mercerislandbooks.com ONGOING EVENT

Washington State Spring Fair. Get a head start on summer fair fun with rides, music, pig racing, dock dogs and more. Thursday– Sunday, April 20–23. $8–$12; ages 5 and under free; all kids free Thursday with food bank donation. Puyallup. thefair.com Family Nature Class. Science-based exploration and outdoor play. Thursday–Saturday, 9:30–11:30 a.m. $18 per adult/child pair; preregister. Ages 2–5 with caregiver. Washington Park Arboretum, Seattle. botanicgardenscatalog.org ONGOING EVENT

Seattle Cherry Blossom and Japanese Cultural Festival. Taiko drumming, artisan craft demos, traditional food and games. Friday–Sunday, April 21–23. FREE. Seattle Center Fisher Pavilion. seattlecenter.com/festal Roald Dahl’s James and the Giant Peach Jr. Go along on a fantastical adventure with James and his buggy cohorts as they travel in the giant peach. Friday–Sunday, April 21–23. $10. Ages 4 and up. Auburn Avenue Theater. auburnwa.gov

Arbor Day – Earth Day Family Festival. Eco activities, ranger walks and kids’ passport activity. 11 a.m.–1:30 p.m. FREE. Lewis Creek Park, Bellevue. bellevuewa.gov Edible City Science Fair. Mark Earth Day investigating the science of food and farming with hands-on activities. 10 a.m.–4 p.m. Included with admission. MOHAI, Seattle. mohai.org Earth Day Extravaganza. Dig into keeping the earth a healthy home. Noon–4 p.m. FREE. Ages 4 and up with families. Tacoma Nature Center. metroparkstacoma.org

26 Ballard Church Indoor Play. This neighborhood church opens its doors for families with tots to stop by and play. Tuesday– Thursday, 10:30 a.m.–1:30 p.m. FREE. Ages 0–8 with adult. Ballard Church, Seattle. ballardchurch.com Play with Clay. Stop by to squish, squash, sculpt and build with clay during this open clay studio time. Select Tuesdays, 2–3 p.m. Included with admission. Ages 1–10 with adult. KidsQuest Children’s Museum, Bellevue. kidsquestmuseum.org

Luzia: A Waking Dream of Mexico. Cirque du Soleil transports audiences through a surreal vision of Mexico, encompassing nature, culture, myths and music. Through May 21. $35 and up. Marymoor Park, Redmond. cirquedusoleil.com Kent Indoor Park. This play gym aims to provide a park experience for tots, but indoors and dry. Tuesday–Thursday, 9:30–11 a.m. $2. Ages 10 months–4½ with adult. Kent Commons. kentwa.gov

Tot Shabbat. Gather with other families to celebrate with songs and snacks; play time after. 9:45–10:30 a.m. FREE. Ages 0–5 with caregiver. Stroum Jewish Community Center, Mercer Island. sjcc.org World Rhythm Festival. Friday is family day of this percussion fest with performances and workshops for all. Friday– Saturday, April 28–30. FREE. Seattle Center Armory. swps.org

Kelsey Creek Sheep Shearing. Watch the sheep get a haircut, go on a wagon rides, visit the farm animals. 11 a.m.–4 p.m. Free entry; some activities have fee. Kelsey Creek Farm, Bellevue. farmerjayne.com Tiptoe through the Tidepools. Explore tide pool life on the beach during one of the lowest tides of the year, with a naturalist guide on hand. 1–4 p.m. FREE. All ages. Titlow Beach, Tacoma. metroparkstacoma.org

parentmap.com • April 2017 • 27

Presented by Bellevue Parks & Community Services Bellevue Youth Theatre

April 21-30, 2017

Bellevue Youth Theatre-Crossroads 16051 NE 10th Street, Bellevue

Advance tickets: $12. After April 17 tickets will be $15. All seats are reserved and we do sell out. Buying your tickets early is highly recommended.

For group rates and special pricing, show information or tickets, call Sheila Framke at the BYT Box Office, 425-452-7155.

28 â&#x20AC;˘ April 2017 â&#x20AC;˘ parentmap.com

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Kick off summer at the All-Star Softball Classic Supporting local homeless and struggling youth

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32 â&#x20AC;˘ April 2017 â&#x20AC;˘ parentmap.com

Purchase tickets today: SymphonyTacoma.org | 253-591-5894 Series sponsor:

out + about

Find more destination libraries at www.parentmap. com/libraries

A river runs through it: Renton Library

BOOK IT TO THESE DESTINATION LIBRARIES Build a spring day trip, and a love for books, around one of these Puget Sound-area gems

PHOTOS AND STORY BY JIAYING GRYGIEL

libraries used to be places where you went to check out a book or ask a question at the reference desk. Now, libraries are all that and much, much more, with a wide-ranging roster of activities, programs and events for kids and adults, as well as special attractions that make some of our local libraries bona fide tourist destinations. The best part? Everything is still free. At the library, my two kids will gleefully collect a small mountain of books. It’s so empowering to pick out anything — anything! — they want and get to take it home. More than 460,000 people are Seattle Public Library cardholders, including my 5-year-old. “We are in the part of the country where people really do value libraries and really do use their libraries,” says Julie Acteson, community relations and marketing director for the King County Library System.

Seattle voters approved a $196.4 million bond measure in 1998 that paid for a new downtown library, added four brand-new libraries and replaced or renovated 22 neighborhood branches. In the King County Library System, a $172 million capital bond measure approved by voters in 2004 paid for 15 new libraries, 11 expanded libraries, 13 renovated libraries and two parking-expansion projects. All this investment has added up to some showstopping libraries around the Puget Sound region. Find out which library is shaped like a boat, which has a rooftop garden and which offers you a view of salmon swimming underneath it. Building a day around a library visit is a good way to explore a new neighborhood — and to encourage your kids to love books.

parentmap.com • April 2017 • 33

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BOOK IT continued from page 33

CENTRAL LIBRARY

1000 Fourth Ave., Seattle spl.org/locations/central-library

The Central Library, which opened in 2004 to a collective gasp from the architecture community, is an iconic building at the heart of the Seattle library system, and its children’s section is so vast, it’s practically like its own branch. Children’s librarian Jenny Craig loves the Central Library because of the scope of the collection — “We have most things” — and the open play areas. There are blocks, puzzles and Magna-Tiles galore in the hot pink zone. On most weekdays, the toddler and preschool set has the run of the place, because few families live downtown. Take the elevator up to the 10th floor. There you’ll find a dizzying lookout point where you can peer all the way down to the lobby. On level four, the walls, ceilings and floors are all painted trippy shades of deep pink and red. Most of the library’s nonfiction collection is located in a “book spiral,” composed of four levels connected by a continuous gentle ramp. Big call numbers are clearly printed on the floor. It’s a great walk for little ones learning digits (and it’s stroller-friendly, too).

DAY TRIP: Two blocks from the library is Columbia Center, where you can get a 360-degree view of the city from the observation deck on the 73rd floor. We like the (free) view from the Starbucks on the 40th floor just as much. Also fun for families is the first floor of the Seattle Art Museum, with a free art-making space and a hidden mural.

RENTON LIBRARY

100 Mill Ave. S., Renton kcls.org/locations/1556

4 34 • April 2017 • parentmap.com

The most distinctive feature of King County Library System’s Renton branch — which was built in 1966 and renovated in August

2015 — is that it’s built over the Cedar River. The library rests on 12 giant columns on an 80-foot bridge. The stunning location has its challenges. To wash the windows on the building’s north side, window washers have to rappel down the side like Spiderman. The interior of the library is one giant open space with a row of study rooms in the back. You can sit by the floor-to-ceiling windows with a book and watch the mallards paddling in the river. Stop by the library during Renton River Days in July to watch rubber ducks float downstream. In the early fall, you can see salmon making their annual migration.

DAY TRIP: The library sits on the edge of Liberty Park, with a playground, baseball field and skate park. On the other side of Interstate 405, Cedar River Park includes a community center, a theater and a big outdoor swimming complex (open seasonally) with two corkscrew water slides.

SUZZALLO LIBRARY

University of Washington 4000 15th Ave. N.E., Seattle lib.washington.edu/suzzallo Everyone calls it the “Harry Potter room.” With its Gothic details, vaulted ceilings, stained-glass windows and ornate bookcases lined with 16,000 books, the Reading Room at the University of Washington’s (UW) Suzzallo Library does look like the stuff of fiction. At the entrance to the Reading Room, you’re greeted by a giant purple sign reading “Entering Silent Zone.” It’s quiet enough to hear a pin drop. Tour groups and selfie-taking visitors stream in and out of the Reading Room, but if your child doesn’t have a mute button, expect to incur the fury of Reading Room users. On the day we visited, however, library staff was friendly and welcoming. Stroller? Here’s the elevator. First visit? Here’s a brochure. Just outside the Reading Room is one of the world’s biggest books, a photo book about Bhutan.

The pages are the size of a dining table and are turned about once a month.

TIP: The University of Washington is public, so anyone can visit the library and use the materials on site. You can also get a free temporary UW NetID to use the wireless network.

5614 22nd Ave. N.W., Seattle spl.org/locations/ballard-branch

4x5

The Ballard branch is the Chia Pet of the Seattle library system. On top of its roof is 4 inches of soil planted with more than 18,000 Northwest native plants. It’s a roof that needs to be mowed and have its weeds whacked. To see for yourself, ask library staff to take you upstairs to look around, or use a periscope on the main level to check out the roof; look for two unmarked slits in the wall, just to the right as you walk in the main entrance. The library, which opened in 2005, is one of the busiest branches in the city. Last summer, the library closed for six weeks for renovations, which included replacing carpeting, adding outlets to the tables and lowering the children’s bookshelves for better sightlines. The kids’ section includes Magna-Tiles, big f.pdf 1 12/8/16 8:30 PM Legos and regular story times.

DAY TRIP: The library is located in the heart of Ballard’s retail core. Within a three-block radius, you can pick your poison: Cupcake Royale, Clover (toy store), Secret Garden Books and Sweet Mickey’s candy shop. We love getting the $7.75 extra-large bowl of pho beef noodle soup from Than Brothers on Market Street. For free fun, check out the skate park and fountains (open seasonally) just outside the library at Ballard Commons Park.

SAMMAMISH LIBRARY

825 228th Ave. S.E., Sammamish kcls.org/locations/1534 Bring your thermos of cocoa and settle into a comfy seat by the fireplace. You might feel like you are at a fancy lodge — one that happens to be stuffed with books. The Sammamish Library, which opened in 2010, is modern, light and bright, with walls of windows and

DAY TRIP: The UW’s cherry trees typically bloom through April in The Quad behind the library (on Twitter, follow @uwcherryblossom for blossom status). The campus is also home to two museums that are good for kids: The Henry Art Gallery, now free on Sundays; and the Burke Museum (free on the first Thursday of the month), which covers natural history and culture. If you have a dinosaur fan, the Burke’s playroom is 161208 a must.Crossroads ParentMap Games

BALLARD LIBRARY

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Mozart’s vibrant extravaganza blends myth, magic, and a remarkable variety of marvelous music to deliver its uplifting message of love, life, and light. Join a handsome prince and his comical sidekick on a colorful quest through an enchanted land to rescue the Queen of the Night’s daughter. Mozart’s popular favorite is recommended for ages 5 and up.

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parentmap.com • April 2017 • 35

out + about

BOOK IT continued from page 35 yes, a glass-enclosed gas fireplace. It’s a happening place; Sammamish is the fourth-busiest library in the King County system. The children’s area is partially corralled by a row of bookcases, which is helpful if your children tend to be escape artists. Assistant operations manager John Allman has worked throughout the King County Library System, but the Sammamish Library is at the top of his list. “I have to say, this is about as good as it gets,” Allman says.

DAY TRIP: Pack your swim stuff. Next door to the library is a YMCA that opened last April; it boasts a family swimming pool with a two-story waterslide, lazy river and a shallow wading area for tots. If the weather is nice, bring your scooters and balance bikes instead. The library sits on the edge of a 25acre, two-level park called Sammamish Commons, with a skate park, playground, swings, sand pit and spray park.

BELLEVUE LIBRARY

1111 110th Ave N.E., Bellevue kcls.org/locations/1492 It’s the biggest library in the King County Library System (80,000 square feet) and has the largest staff (six children’s librarians alone). Sometimes, size does matter. The building opened in 1993, and 24 years later, its open footprint still feels modern and inviting. A grand staircase connects the library’s three levels. Skylights and big windows allow in lots of light and views, including — on the day we visited — a view of three cops patting down a man against the library wall outside. (That’s city life for you.) The children’s section is located on the first floor, offering easier access for the stroller-pushing crowd, but unfortunately, it’s also the area with the least amount of natural light. Look for the story time room’s special child-size entrance. The double doors lead to a short tunnel lined with tiles drawn by children, illustrating Pooh, the Cat in the Hat and others beloved storybook characters. Other special features include a huge current newspaper and magazine section, a dedicated Northwest history collection and 362 free parking spots in the adjacent three-story garage.

7 36 • April 2017 • parentmap.com

DAY TRIP: You can see the brand-new KidsQuest Children’s Museum from the library; it’s located just on the other side of a playfield.

Technically, parking at the library is for library patrons only, but . . . Wherever you decide to leave your car, it’s easy to pair a visit to the Bellevue Library with the children’s museum for a fun day with the littles.

BEACON HILL LIBRARY

2821 Beacon Ave. S., Seattle spl.org/locations/beacon-hill-branch At some libraries, crying either gets us a big ol’ stink eye or even kicked out. When my 1-year-old started wailing at the Beacon Hill branch, the woman at the checkout counter leaned over with a tin of stickers. Thank you. Children’s librarian Diane Cowles has worked at the Beacon Hill Library for 27 years, starting in its old storefront location. She’s seen kids grow up and then bring in their kids. “It’s always had a very welcoming feel, because it’s always been a neighborhood of immigrants and refugees,” Cowles says of the diverse neighborhood (more than twothirds of Beacon Hill’s residents are people of color). The architecture of the building echoes that warmth. The library is shaped like a giant ship, and stepping inside is like walking into the belly of an overturned boat. Wood and stone materials keep the vibe cozy, and big windows flood the interior with light. The branch, which opened in 2004, was refurbished in January.

DAY TRIP: Start by taking Link light rail in; there’s a stop just across the street from the library. After you’ve gotten your fill of books, check out the snack options at Despi Delite Bakery (despidelitebakery.com), a Filipino eatery complete with cheerful aunties and mini purple ube rolls, or Fresh Flours (freshfloursseattle.com), where you can get your Japanese-inspired flaky pastry with a side of ambiance. Jefferson Park, less than a mile south of the library, is every little kid’s dream come true. Look for zip lines, a climbing mountain with a bridge, a splash park, paved loops for bike riding and even a food forest for fun foraging.

JiaYing Grygiel is a mama and a photographer in Seattle. She previously worked for MSN and the Seattle Post-Intelligencer, and now blogs about her adventures with her boys, 5 and 1, at photoj.net.

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health

When conceiving again isn’t easy

Secondary infertility affects 3 million American women — why aren’t we talking about it? By Annie Kuo

PHOTO COURTESY OF ANNIE KUO

y 5-year-old insists she’d rather have a puppy than a sibling, but I wonder if someday, she’ll change her mind. My daughter was a miracle, spontaneously conceived after a fertility doctor recommended in vitro fertilization (IVF). A similar miracle is less likely now that I’m 40, no longer trying to conceive with a partner and on the accelerated path to menopause — as I discovered at 34, while consulting the fertility doctor a year after a 14-week pregnancy loss. I was lucky; I learned I was pregnant with my daughter within a month of that consultation. When she was 3, I attempted egg freezing. This method of fertility preservation removes, freezes and stores a woman’s eggs before they’re fertilized. My attempts weren’t fruitful. Egg freezing and its close cousin, IVF, work best when a woman’s ovaries respond to stimulation medications and produce lots of eggs. My ovaries barely responded. So it seems I will likely only give birth to one genetic child — a reality I continue to process. Reminders of the sibling who might have been always seem to pop up. Take a recent photo day at my daughter’s evening preschool. She and I snacked next to the staging area as family after family brought up multiple children for sibling photos. While the photographer captured the sweet cuddles and chubby-cheeked grins, I quietly mourned my powerlessness to produce a biological sibling for my daughter. She, however, seems blissfully unfazed by her singleton state. (Referring to a fellow singleton, she once told me: “Timothy doesn’t have brothers or sisters like me. We’re so lucky!” So maybe I am off the hook? At least for now.) The funny thing is that despite how alone I can feel, my situation is very common. According to the National Center for Health Statistics, more

“My daughter . . . seems blissfully unfazed by her singleton state.”

The author and her daughter than 3 million women in the U.S. struggle with secondary infertility, or the inability to conceive following the birth of one or more children conceived without medical intervention. Of all infertility cases in the U.S., secondary infertility accounts for half of all infertility cases in the U.S., according to Resolve: The National Infertility Association (resolve.org).

Understanding secondary infertility The causes for secondary infertility include parental age, uterine scarring after childbirth and high levels of stress hormones, which can affect ovulation in the woman and sperm production in a man. Unsuccessful attempts to conceive may also be related to a different partner, irregular ovulation, fallopian tube disease or endometriosis.

A parent’s emotions are just as farranging. Often, parents find themselves hovering between two worlds — the fertile and infertile — and sympathy may be harder to find than if they had experienced infertility from the start. Shock or disbelief of not conceiving again can lead to a delay in seeing a fertility specialist even when one is needed. “[People] often experience frustration and confusion, because they wonder why conception was relatively straightforward before but not this time,” says Krista Murtfeldt, LICSW, a psychotherapist who practices in Ballard. “This can be accompanied by feelings of guilt, sadness and regret if they waited to try again.” The curious inquiries of well-meaning friends and relatives often compound those negative emotions. “I feel like every family that has anything other than two kids, two years apart should be prepared to get unhelpful comments,” says Elena*, whom I met in a secondary infertility support group. “People just don’t get secondary infertility. They think fertility is constant.” Elena says she’s often told, “I think your son needs a brother or sister!” or “Don’t wait too long — you want [your kids] to be playmates.” When she does open up about her infertility struggles, Elena says she often gets unrequested advice. >> parentmap.com • April 2017 • 43

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health When conceiving again isn’t easy continued from page 43 “People often dismiss my problems by saying, ‘You are still young’ and ‘It will come when you least expect it!’” she says. “None of [those] make me feel better.” Complicating matters further is the feeling that you’re letting your child down by not having another baby. “Parents can worry about one child carrying the responsibility of aging parents, and they can feel like their family is incomplete,” says Michele Pomarico, LICSW, an infertility counselor and psychotherapist in Northgate. “The parent’s sadness can be mirrored by the thoughts of the child’s loss.”

Tot terrified about teeth? We’ve all been there: Our kids screaming and floundering in the dentist’s chair before the dentist even pulls a toothbrush out. There are even a few adults whom you’ll see doing the same (as a practicing family dentist and a mom myself, I’ve seen it all)! Unfortunately, what seems like a common and extremely normal fear in children can lead to damaging behavior to their health as an adult. Oral health is one of the most forgotten aspects of our overall well-being. For example, if we break a bone or sprain an ankle, most of us would seek immediate medical attention. But how many of us have postponed a visit to the dentist at the onset of a toothache? We often see patients go a year or more without seeking the care of a dentist, at which point the initial toothache has turned into a much larger and more costly issue. Here are four pieces of advice for making sure your child stays all smiles: www.parentmap. com/dental-fears — Nikole D. Shvartsur, DDS

Katie Ford of Seattle had her 2-year-old daughter through IVF. Now she’s trying to conceive again with embryos frozen from that same IVF cycle. In January, she lost a pregnancy that took four embryo transfers to achieve. She has two embryos left to transfer. “Some of my closest friends are getting the age gaps [between their kids that] I so desperately wished for,” she says. “It’s hard to think how different everything would be if it was just easy to get pregnant.” Emily* of Seattle knew she wanted a third child when her second baby was 3 weeks old. She gave birth to her first child at 31, her second at 35 and was nearly 40 when she and her husband turned to a fertility specialist after three pregnancy losses. The news wasn’t good. Eighty percent of Emily’s eggs were chromosomally abnormal, which her doctor said was typical for a woman of her age. The couple decided to go ahead with IVF. They ended up with six blastocysts (a 5- to 6-day old embryo), with only one viable enough to attempt a pregnancy. The transfer of that embryo into Emily’s uterus didn’t take. “My husband and I asked ourselves, ‘Should we give up?’ But our family was just not complete,” says Emily. So, they did another IVF cycle. The lone genetically normal embryo successfully implanted, and Emily became pregnant. She recently gave birth to her third child.

me a place to go, to do something just for myself,” Emily says of the class. “It was an anchor for me emotionally.” Many also find solace by joining infertility support groups. As the host of a monthly Resolve group (resolveseattle.wordpress.com) that meets in Greenwood, I often see palpable relief on the faces of first-time visitors. They realize they’re part of an active community. “The support group in Greenwood is a sanctuary,” says Grace Uomoto, the mother of a 4-year-old boy and a fertility educator trying to conceive her second child. “It’s made such a difference for me to be able to get hugs and meet others who understand what this is like.” Counseling can also help. In her practice, Murtfeldt encourages the use of coping tools such as mindfulness exercises and breathing techniques to help her clients decrease anxiety and, she says, regain power and control in their lives. As for me, I still remember the day that I decided to stop fertility treatment. I was seeing a fertility doctor in Arizona and after an ultrasound, headed out for a quick hike with a friend. I was on Camelback Mountain in Phoenix when my nurse called with disappointing news: My final attempt at an egg retrieval wasn’t going to be possible. “Do you want to turn around and go home?” my friend asked. “No,” I said, “I need to accomplish something while I’m out here. Let’s get to the top.” At the summit, I took a look around and then had a good cry. I knew it was over. The universe just wasn’t opening this door — or at least not this way — for me. So, I focused on other ways to be a parent. Later that year, I completed foster parent training and explored adoption and embryo donation. I am also learning to embrace life with an only child. There are many ways to build a family, and that knowledge — hard learned though it is — gives me peace. n

Finding your village

*Name has been changed for privacy

Parents who’ve been there

In the Seattle area, there are several options to find support. Emily regularly attended a yoga class in the U District, hosted by instructor Lynn Jensen, who often works with women trying to conceive (yogaforfertility.net). “That really gave

Annie Kuo is an ambassador for Resolve: The National Infertility Association and is training chair for Infertility Advocacy Day 2017. She lives in Shoreline with her daughter. parentmap.com • April 2017 • 45

stream

The politics of science class

Why chances are good your kid isn’t learning much about climate change By Rebecca Hill

inety-seven percent of climate scientists agree: Our world’s warming climate is a result of human activities. And yet we live in a world where governments tell scientists to withhold taxpayer-funded climate change research results from the public, websites such as that of the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) avoid any mention of climate science and a world leader calls climate change a “hoax invented by the Chinese.” No wonder our science teachers don’t know what to teach.

Not on the radar Then, four years ago, a little something called the Next Generation Science Standards (NGSS, nextgenscience.org) came along. Led by state governors in consultation with the National Research Council, the National Science Teachers Association and the American Association for the Advancement of Science, the NGSS established specific guidelines for students studying science. According to the NGSS, students needed to graduate from high school knowing how to construct explanations, evaluate solutions, analyze data and use computational representations based on scientific evidence — all measures that scientists themselves perform during experiments. States can decide whether or not to adopt or adapt the NGSS, or they can simply write their own standards. The standards are offered as a tool for states to use, but are neither affiliated with nor enforced by the federal government. To date, only 19 states — including Washington — have adopted NGSS, while other states, including Idaho, Wyoming and Oklahoma, have removed or altered the language regarding climate change being caused by human activity, which means a kid in Washington might take a science class radically different from the same class taught elsewhere in the country, and that teachers, no matter where they are, often hesitate to teach hotbutton topics like climate change. “[Climate science] is the most important subject 46 • April 2017 • parentmap.com

to be teaching,” says Noam Gundle, a science teacher at the Ballard Maritime Academy in Seattle. “We are in a crisis, and students need to know what is causing it, what we can do about it and the news about it.” But that conclusion is, perhaps not surprisingly, highly political. There’s history here. In 1926, Tennessee schoolteacher John Scopes was convicted of violating Tennessee’s Butler Act — legislation that barred the teaching of evolution in any state-funded school. While the Scopes trial may

Awareness Network (CLEAN, cleanet.org). A third of students get mixed messages from their teachers on how serious it is, McCaffrey says. Often, he notes, climate science is being squeezed into the curriculum and being taught almost in passing. There are plenty of reasons why that is happening. For one thing, when teachers who currently teach science got their degrees, most teacher education departments weren’t teaching climate science. It was an emerging field, and much of the research-based knowledge we have now — for example, that the global temperature has increased 1.7 degrees Fahrenheit since 1880, according to NASA — hadn’t been widely publicized or, in Fewer than some cases, even discovered. “The biggest challenge that a quarter of many teachers face is bringing themselves up to speed on the high school science,” says David Evans, Ph.D., students receive executive director of the National Science Teachers Association instruction in (nsta.org). Still, Evans is optimistic. The teaching community is earth science. strongly supportive of learning and teaching this science, he says. Compounding the issue is a sound like old news, it’s not; numerous school lack of space for climate science in a teacher’s set districts continue to teach creationism, and states curriculum. Oftentimes, subjects that students will like Scopes’ Tennessee permit teachers to teach be tested on — physics or biology, for example — “scientific strengths and scientific weaknesses” have pushed climate science out. It’s simply not a of theories that “cause controversy,” including priority among so many other priorities. evolution, climate change and global warming. That said, there is one course that does consistently cover climate science: Advanced What’s the big deal? Placement (AP) Environmental Science. Nearly According to the American Geosciences Institute, 98,000 students took the AP Environmental fewer than a quarter of high school students receive Science Exam in 2013 — up from the 79,738 instruction in earth science (compare this to students who took the exam in 2011, according to the approximately 91–94 percent of high school a 2014 report from CollegeBoard, the organization students enrolled in biology). On the rare occasion that administers AP exams. Still, that’s 98,000 when climate science is mentioned, three out of four compared to the more than 162,000 students who science teachers only address it for one to two hours, took the AP Biology Exam in 2013. according to a 2016 study published in Science. Science teacher Aaron Butler of Capital High Even then, the lesson is often a confusing one, School in Boise, Idaho, spends “a significant says Mark McCaffrey, an author of the study and founder of the Climate Literacy and Energy portion” of his AP Environmental Science course

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ScienceTechnologyRoboticsEngineeringArtsMath on climate change and the evidence behind it. The reason for this is simple, he says: “We spend 99 percent of our time on evidencebased science.” But Butler lives in a state that, as of February, removed climate change language from its version of the NGSS. With that change, his students now learn lessons that are much different than those even students in neighboring schools might be taught. Plus, there’s always the threat of controversy, says Butler. “It’s a tough topic to teach,” he says. “In the back of my mind is always the worry that I will be confronted by a parent that sees this issue solely as a political issue.”

Walking a fine line Many science teachers find themselves as conflicted as Butler: They recognize the importance of teaching the next generation about climate science, but fear repercussions. So, to straddle that difficult line, a teacher will teach “both sides.” A 2015 study published by researchers at Oklahoma State University (OSU) analyzed the reactions of Oklahoma science teachers who teach climate change; 89 percent of surveyed teachers

agreed that they should teach or discuss both sides of the controversy Sign up by May 1 to save $15 about global warming. using promo code INNOVATE15 The problem is, teaching “both sides” gives validity to the idea that For children entering K-6th grade — there’s actually no fixed consensus Led by experienced local educators about human-caused global warming, when, in fact, there is. (Just • Hands-on Fun • STEM Concepts • Design & Build ask NASA.) • Teamwork • Problem Solving Prototypes There is, however, validity to teachers using the “both sides” 1,000+ Summer Programs Nationwide tactic. The authors of the OSU study argue that teaching both sides — campinvention.org | 800.968.4332 which they called an “everyday act of resistance” — may be one way to In partnership with the United States address issues that are historically Patent and Trademark Oﬃce controversial while still covering the actual science. In other words: It’s better than nothing. Of course, it’s not that there’s no room for debate in climate science, Challenging K-12 students says the study’s co-author, Nicole in an intellectual community through early entrance, and Colston, Ph.D. “It’s that the debate outreach learning programs. shouldn’t be over climate change actually existing.” We offer of Washington Seattle campus: Being ableon tothe tellUniversity the difference Online • Transition School • UW Academy • Saturday Enrichment matters. “[Today’s students] will Courses • Summer Programs • Professional Development be involved in helping provide solutions,” says Gundle of the Ballard For more information, Maritime Academy. “The we We offer on the UniversityChalo visitsooner our website: www.RobinsonCenter.uw.edu in an start, the better.” n Phone: 206-543-4160 Email: rcys@uw.edu

Rebecca Hill is a freelance writer who writes about education, literacy, libraries, parenting and family, and science.

EDITOR’S NOTE: Science, technology, robotics, engineering, art and math: In our schools and communities, there is more demand than ever for STREAM. Yet only about a third of eighthgraders score “proficient” in math and science. In this ongoing series, sponsored this month by Camp Invention, we’ll explore how schools and organizations are approaching STREAM in new, game-changing ways.

• Transition School • UW Ac thro • Summer Programs •outrP

We offer on the University of Washington Seattle ca

We offer on the University of Washington Seattle campus: • Transition School • UW Academy • Saturday Enrich Programs • Professional Developmen Transition School • UW Academy••Summer Saturday Enrichment For more Summer Programs • Professional Development visit ou For more information, visit our website: Challenging K-12 students in an intellectual community www.Robins www.RobinsonCenter.uw.edu Phone: 206-543-4160 through early entrance, and outreach learning programs. Phone: 2 Email: rcys@uw.edu

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parentmap.com • April 2017 • 47

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