Blink issue 07 march08 2014

CATCH ME IF YOU CAN Searching for Meerut’s errant leopard, with a van full of truants and enthusiasts p2 saturday, march 8, 2014

r ravindran

Stars flock to his show as do fans.

Kapil Sharma brings the house down with his brand of desi humour p10

The king of LOL nights

BITE OF HISTORY The Act of Killing missed the Oscars, but won the critics p14

EMPTY GLOVES Is Captain Cool Mahendra Singh Dhoni losing his shine p22

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A shadow of himself The town that cried leopard

Mahendra Singh Dhoni was the captain who could do no wrong. But his selection decisions and the tail results overseasbig leave On the of Meerut’s cat,much BLink to hasbea desired few close encounters with rumour-mongers, pranksters, dodgy local reporters, harried officials and yes, Mr Spots himself

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ahendra Dhoni’s t 10am on Singh February 28, survival Sushant instincts, of late, have reSharma, divisional forestbeen officer, peatedly challenged, evenaas call. the Meerut district, received Mr the Coolincident of Indian cricket 24, atSince of February tempts reinventhundreds his image. of he had to attended of The callsleader and this men is lost for direction and words as Khurahe enone was no less important.

It was Neeta ters his career’s crucialVidyalaya phase in the run na, principal of most a Kendriya in Meeup defend the World Cup so gloriruttocity.

Panic-stricken, she that hadhe called the ously in 2011. Times haveher changed for forest won department because staff had him, his team has to she exfoundand ‘pugmarks’.

Laterfailed that to day,live at up 2pm, pectations.

“The manthe to lead the team,” called again to best inform department of declared the national Dhoni some disturbing CCTVselectors footage,when which capwas handed the job forofthe firstlooked time atlike Bangatured the movement what the lore in 2007, in the One DayWith Internaleopard within thetruncated school premises. the tional Australia.the The same India board against exams starting next day,year Khurana won thetaking inaugural T20 World underwere his wasn’t any chances.

TheCup students captaincy. cricket an packed offIndian and the armyhad was discovered called in. The aggressive captain whothat washad willing to move search for the leopard brought Meeaway traditional safety-first rut tofrom a haltthe a week ago, began afresh.attitude and the pattern of defensive field placements n February 24, residents of Meerut and bowling changes.

Here was a manawoke who situation they were completely undaredtotoaexperiment. prepared for. for A leopard had now, strayed from beDhoni has, some time stopped inyond the army cantonment area have and sought novating; his attack instincts been refuge at a timber merchant’s godown in Sadar Bazaar, before heading to the cantonment hospital, where he was locked inside a ward for nearly 10 hours. Hundreds gathered outside the hospital. Cameras flashed relentlessly.

The army, the police and the forest depart-

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first to admit that.out He to can self-critishelved as he into looksaction. to shepherd of be ment swung A teamhis of team doctors all the of them have turned bebe dead ends. newcomers.

“Too defensive,” notes former In- cal, is known to stand players and this from the Noida-based Wildlife Trust of India “They were paw printsbyofhis dogs.

All week.

No himhe keep hisand job.proceeds to take out a dia captain Bishan Bedi, known his helps (WII), armed withSingh tranquiliser guns,fortook big cat,” says, Dhoni’sand attention to detailout is his “He honest comments.

Dhoni’s first Test as captheir positions.

Inside the ward, the leopard notepad scale, sketching theforte. measureread game superbly and is 10x9cm ahead of tain, South Africa at KanpurItindug 2008, grewagainst more and more distressed. its can ments of the a leopard paw — roughly — easeKumar, with which settled in was a success. is a mere shadow of that claws, almost But onehe centimetre deep, into the others. for SDOThe Sanjiv whohe has comedown in with cool and calm ably slipped in- international cricket an earlyappearance. indication walls, and tookskipper, a 12-feetwho leapsotowards the ceilthe latest report of awas rumoured of histhey’ve calibre,”seen, says former nationto the role and commanded thefan and twist- The ‘pugmarks’ ing, clawing its way through the including the al selector Kiran More.

Dhoni had respect of seniors like Sachin Ten- through the one at Kendriya ing it out of shape.

Later, it tore Vidyalaya, are half that size. played six months of meminterdulkar, Rahul VVS seven Laxman concrete wall,Dravid, injuring people on its For a weekhardly now, eight teams with five national cricket when coach and and Sehwag. wayVirender out, bounding over a 10-foot bers each, have fanned out across Former Indiadarts skipper former master high wall. Three wereSourav fired at Dhoni has stopped the cityAustralian on a 24-hour vigil. Greg Each Chappell, a selection meeting, Ganguly findsstruck.

Dhoni’sNocaptaincy it; only one one has time a in sighting is reported, innovating, his proclaimed him as India’s “future stagnant.

“He’s become very resighted it since. crowds gather at the site.

“I’ve noattack instincts Wherever a leopard captain.”

It was astute observapetitive.

There is a shut predictable A two-day curfew the city have been shelved ticed a band ofan youth that assemsighting is reported, tion of the finest shouting students method to histhe captaincy, whichapis down after mysterious blesbyatone these places, a band of youth easy to read opponents. of I of‘tendua the game. pearance and for disappearance aa gaya, tendua dikh gaya’. gathers and shouts, Dhoni learnt the tricksget oftheir the would want him to takehas thelimped initiathe leopard.

Meerut They scare the residents, “tendua aa gaya” trade on his own, “He setive notinwait things to backand to life the for days that folpictures clicked forobserved the papers Dravid, Ganguly, happen.”

But Ganguly a lone voice of dissent niors like Tendulkar, lowed, but the fear of is the leopard and run away,Sehwag, laughing,” says dressingDespite room and grew as a because many, including Sunil Gavaskar, who Laxman in the continues to stalk its townsfolk.

In Sharma. the-boy-whoat how hering handles therumours, media,” is fairly critical of Dhoni, support scores of calls, residents havehis captain- person. Lookcried-wolf to these says More.and Having excelled in all forms the cy until in theto World Cupsuspicious in Australia‘pugmarks’, next year. called report the forest police departments can’t of afford Dhoni ismovements, not a perfectdogs captain and he would Dhoni recognised the potential shadowy barking and pea- game, to let their guard down, even for a day. of the and whipped them a cocks calling. “For two days after it was first younger Storiesplayers in local newspapers have onlyinto added unit, especially at home. horror show sighted, I got at least 100 calls every day. Now, I winning to the panic... tales of a “leopard repeated failure spotted to win ain Test series get 15,” says DFO Sharma. “Initially, they were inIndia’s Ghaziabad”, a leopard Hastinais oftenone unfairly to Dhoni’s to report sightings, but now people mostly overseas pur and another foundlinked in Muzaffarnagar, HeMeerut is yet toleopard win a series in England, call to enquire.” Since February 24, 10 places in captaincy. even as the resurfaces with New Zealand andIt South The the city have reported suspicious activity and Australia, great regularity on paper. wouldAfrica. seem that recent debacles in South Africa and New Zealand, where India failed to win even a match has dented his image of a successful captain.

Former England captain Mike Brearley, in the Art of Captaincy, writes a captain must have “some ability as a player. He must have common sense. He needs to know the game, and have ‘leadership qualities’, whatever they are.

He must be willing from time to time to take an unpopular line.” Dhoni symbolises that, even though, of late, he has come under intense scrutiny for some of his tactics.

At 32, he has been criticised for backing a set of players, a “coterie” as a former cricketer bemoaned. His preference for Ravindra Jadeja ahead of Pragyan Ojha as a left-arm spinner in Tests and shunning leg-spinner Amit Mishra to the bench have been glaring oversights.

“He is making the most of what is available. He has a poor bowling attack at his command and you can’t win overseas with this kind of attack. He picks a fair XI,” says More.

But critics highlight Dhoni’s indifference towards talent like Ishwar Pandey and Mishra, his inexplicable fondness for a struggling Suresh Raina, and his role in keeping out Gautam Gambhir and Harbhajan Singh.

Some fine captains, like Sunil Gavaskar, Bedi, Steve Waugh, Clive Lloyd, Ian Chappell, at different stages, notably Chappell, have had their brushes with the administration but Dhoni has had unstinted support from the Board. It has helped and harmed him, made him authoritative and oblivious to criticism. He knows nothing can shake him from the exalted seat of captaincy, not until the World Cup in Australia early next year.

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Heaven help MS Dhoni keeps an eye on the ball but misses the catch in a recent test in New Zealand ap/ross setford

vijay lokapally is deputy editor (sports) The Hindu

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census for the prey base here. But Col Ahlawat informs us that all dogs, barring one, have returned. The leopard has hunted, we hope.

As the light rain turns into a hailstorm, the DFO and the WTI team head back to the forest department office. On the way, the DFO inspects the traps, which will be laid for the leopard later that night along with cameras to track it. “There’s a 50-50 chance of success,” says Dr Singhai. Talk veers to choosing an appropriate bait. Dogs are vetoed — “bahut halla machate hain (they make a lot of noise)”. Goats get a go-ahead — “bakri nahin, inhumane ho jayega. Bakra le leten hain (not a nanny goat, it’s too inhumane, a billy goat is okay)”.

Back in office, they start work on a new strategy. “Personally, I think it can be left alone, now that it’s in its habitat” says Sharma, poring over maps. The nearest settlement is Mamepur village, about 500m away. Beyond that lie vast swathes of forests. “But the army wants us to clear the area,” he says. Besides, without proof, the spectre of fear will continue to haunt the city.

Natural disaster (clockwise from top) A resident of Meerut avoids a collision with the leopard on February 23 AP; a policeman charges at it with a baton at the cantonment hospital AP; and suspected pugmarks in the Begum Pul area PTI

towns and villages in western Uttar Pradesh are playing reluctant hosts to a sudden congregation of leopards from all over the region.

Last week, local newspapers reported a leopard on the prowl at villages on the GhaziabadMeerut border. A helpline number was also circulated; a wrong number that was “temporarily not in service” since its debut in the papers.

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n Saturday, March 1, a local reporter thrusts his mike and flashes the camera at a drowsy DFO. “I’ve not slept properly in the last week,” says Sharma. His cheeks are puffy, eyes red with exhaustion, and his waistline has shrunk to the third hole of his belt, he complains. Theories on the whereabouts of the leopard are exchanged — some within reason, many incredible. One of the incrediblevariety is that the leopard, love-struck, has strayed into the city to locate its premika or the she-leopard from Jarauda recently rescued by the department. If such rumours aren’t doing enough damage already, there is another one rapidly gaining ground — it’s about time the leopard hunted. So look for a kill; missing poultry, dogs, cattle or even humans.

At around 1pm on Saturday, the DFO’s phone buzzes again. This time it looks like a credible report. Colonel RK Sharma summons the DFO and the WTI team to Lal Kurti police station, which is close to the cantonment area.

Loading his rifle into the jeep, he hurries on.

Meanwhile, information has leaked to the media and two members of the local press also make an appearance at the station, inviting

the colonel’s wrath. After a few sharp remarks, According to data collected by the Ministry the colonel hops into his jeep and drives at of Environment and Forests (MoEF) in 2013, breakneck speed, heading to the cross-coun- 653 persons were killed and more than 17,000 try area — grounds abutted by forested land — injured by leopards in the last decade in 12 within the cantonment. states, including UP. While the suburbs of Colonel Deep Ahlawat joins the group. The Mumbai have seen leopards routinely stray inarea, he tells us, is preparing for a horse show to urban areas, UP has seen an alarming inscheduled shortly. That morning, Dafedar An- crease in man-animal conflicts in the last two kush, had heard the leopard roaring. All the months. The notorious maneater of UP, which dogs in the area had suddenly disappeared has killed seven people, is still on the loose. “It and the nilgai herd had moved too. “I have depends on how you look at man-animal conlived close to Corbett National Park,” says An- flict. I’d call this straying,” says Dr Abhijeet kush, “I can tell when it’s a big cat.”

Bhawal of WTI, who has come from Kaziranga The weather in these parts has Wildlife Sanctuary to help out. been capricious the last week. In “The forests of UP are not protectbetween bursts of heavy rain, ed by buffer zones.” In western UP, even hailstorms, the skies have sugarcane fields and settlements “Some of the snuck in some much-needed sunsit cheek-by-jowl with the forests. pugmarks are just shine. The horses practising for In the season for cutting (Novemseven hours old” the show have left a marked trail ber to March), such conflicts inon the soft soil. Amid those trails, crease, says Dr Dhawal. The DFO the pugmarks of a big cat are unlooks on wearily. “But the leopard mistakable. The leopard has been is over 5km away from the city. here, as early as that morning. “Some of the Meerut is safe now,” he declares, before walkpugmarks are seven hours old,” says Dr Sau- ing out to relay the same message to the press. rabh Singhai from WTI. “They’re certainly a The sighting of the pugmarks is the singleleopard’s. There is no doubt about it,” he says. most credible evidence found by the forest deSoon a packet of plaster of paris arrives and partment since its first encounter with the casts are made for the pugmarks. They will be Meerut leopard on February 24 (the rest of Inchecked against the pugmarks from the hos- dia could briefly track him on twitter at pital. Some of them are more than a day old. In @MeerutLeopard). After placing the traps last the cantonment’s forested land, spread over week, the leopard has not made an appear160 acres and rich in prey base, the leopard ance in the city. The DFO is relieved. “Maybe, I seems to have found its natural home. “It may can get a good night’s sleep now,” he says. have lived here for years and we may not have known,” says the colonel. There has been no priyanka kotamraju

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few years, the final phase should be over too,” says Rathore. Accordingly, IMD’s observation, communications and computational systems upgraded, thestill National Dirty, open changed were drastically, but we seem toWeather Foresecret As in Delhi was revamped, High Perbehave ascast if itCentre were the same bio-degradmuch as 50 formance Computing able material that will disappearSystems with thewere installed, per cent of Doppler Weather Radars planted along the monsoon.

But it is not so — now visible solid waste coastlines, especially the town, eastern coast, and garbage piles line every village and in India is of Automated Weather Stations, so much the of itnumber plastic, and it merely grows not bioover 1,000 andItcounting, added to. degradable and never diminishes. poses a serious s thanthoni Meanwhile, organisations like the Indian threat to our and the livestock’s health.

Centre forcausing Ocean Information ServicIt’s also, National in all likelihood, longes (INCOIS), Hyderabad, andand the National Interm pollution of toxins in the soil stitute of Ocean Technology (NIOT), Chennai, waterways; in this way also contaminatwhich are also under the MoES, have been exing our food chain. information data with While changing aiming for zero waste,and we sharing can “It is aby two-way process. While they improve the theIMD. situation immediately us oceanography-related informaadjustingprovide our habits in line with our we provide them meteorological upchanged tion, rubbish.

The government has dates,” says Rathore. prescribed the rules and regulations for In many has always been at this; we need to putways, themRathore into practise. the forefront of IMD’s modernisation.

When Our duty as citizens is to segregate our thewaste. department’s first supercomputer was setmade the Indian subcontinent my home, precious biodiversity area but the en- household Even living in flats in 1989,we he can was selected the principal scithe plastic bag was not the ubiquitous lightened park director — a legend in his without up gardens compostasour entific officer.

“With the recent creature it is today — the occasional duty time — Sanjay Deb Roy, argued that the bio-degradable waste odourlessly by us-developments as well as the information we receive from satfree or M&S bag I brought were sought- damage done was minimal compared to ing effective microorganisms. ellites like after items that were used carefully and the benefit of having such a large constitIn India as muchINSAT as 50 and per Kalpana-1, cent of thewhich provide updates everyconsists 30 minutes, our predictions many times over both by myself and oth- uency of park supporters. municipal solid waste of biodebeen foolproof,” says. “When I joined ers. Packaging was mainly paper, recyCertainly, the picnic damage was in- gradablehave items.

If these are kepthe separate plotted manually, cled, used school exercise books and deed minimal: their discarded leaf plates from theIMD, rest,we they can bedata safely used fora cumbersome process.

Now we can data into numerical such, and the iniquities of plastic and and cooked meal remains were food for energy, for cooking and/or forload compost, models and tabulate to make a forecast.” other petroleum-based packaging was as the birds or composted quickly. There while the rest is cleaner and can be recyWhile Rathore admits thatthe there’s a tendenwere no empty tetrapak drink cartons, cled or reused yet hardly known. more easily.

Imagine to play it safe, is quick to point out that In the early ’80s, I was working in Ma- no plastic or aluminium packets of salty saving tocyour landfills andhethe potential apart from Phailin and Lehar, IMD has not recnas, a beautiful national park of Assam, snacks. Even biscuits came in waxed pa- for cleaner energy. ommended evacuation for any of the other on the border of Bhutan. On a winter per not plastic wrappers. Economic major cyclones.

“The public at large probably gruisen is a wildlife weekend up to 100 busloads of visitors growth brings an exponential increase in joanna van don’t understand goes behind these deconservationist andwhat hotelier based would drive through the reserve to Moth- rubbish. How different a busload of photographer, but we have to be careful not to triganguri to picnic by the river. Many lunch debris might look now. near Pannacisions, Tiger Reserve ger alarm. It’s a very thin line at times, so we baulked at such huge crowds invading a In a couple of decades, our waste has are forced to take informed risks. But I make the final call and I do it after hearing from my best people,” says Rathore. verybody knows the quintessential Mohapatra, head of the Cyclone Forecast DiviWhile the cyclonic and other extreme Indian weatherman joke — “If the sion at the Indian Meteorological Department weather-related predictions place IMD in the weatherman says it’s not going to (IMD) was asked if the depression over Bay of spotlight, other routine, but equally imporrain, take your umbrella along.” Bengal, later christened Cyclone Madi, was a tant efforts often go unnoticed. Not only does While the severest critics and cynics might threat, he had calmly said no. the department have its finger on the pulse of still stand by this, a little-known yet extraor“We have a standard operating procedure. India’s weather, but it also maps the condidinary achievement by the IMD should be By looking at numerical models, wind flow, tions for the entire region. “The Regional Speenough to change the minds of doubters. wind-shearing patterns and other inputs, we cialised Meteorological Centre (RSMC) is part On October 9, 2013, a good three days before traced its exact trajectory in advance. We reac- of the IMD as well,” says Mohapatra, “From Cyclone Phailin’s landfall, LS Rathore, the di- hed the conclusion that it wouldn’t hit the Myanmar to Oman, it all falls under our purrector general of the IMD, and his team stated coastline,” says Mohapatra. “Madi was an in si- view. Every day, we also send across a Tropical that the cyclone would hit the coastline near tu condition, not forced by any earlier weath- Weather Outlook to several countries.” With Gopalpur, Odisha. And on October 12, the cy- er event, but we observed the developments regards to any major weather event in the reclone made landfall within 3km of the predict- and decided that once it crosses 13°N latitude, gion, the RSMC takes the final call. a guyEven who hadn’tit fed ingly2012, unflappable. he’s had a bit of ed mark, as close to a zero-error prediction as it would change or course. though was more a Since a five-daySure weather forecast is than three people emerging unscathed from the humanly possible. The IMD’s call stood out, es- VSCS, the atmospheric and on an average practise —sent out, a major improvement day, orand pictured woods at least two contipecially since in the world of meteorology, oceanic conditions our 10,000 fans root- journalistic from few on years ago when only ing for him on Facebook up until nents after he made it to the top five on predicting the landfall of tropical cyclones readings of it, pointed towards 24-hour forecasts were provided June Desai seems surpris- MasterChef 2013. But They anyone who even within a 50-100km error margin is seen this shift,” helast says.year, The Rishi National byAustralia the department. have alPhailin was relatively as accurate. They had also anticipated that Disaster Management Associso increased the frequencies of easy. It was cyclone Phailin would be a Very Severe Cyclonic Storm ation (NDMA), just recovering specialised forecasts for agriculMadi that gave us (VSCS), a grade lower than a super cyclone from Phailin was more than reture, aviation and marine navitrouble, changing its forecasted by meteorologists in the US. With a lieved to hear this. The predicgation, and are looking to foray direction before wind speed of 210km/hr (minimum require- tion came almost a week before into new areas, such as forecasts hitting the coast ment for a super cyclone classification is the actual event mimicked the for industries. “Everything is 222km/hr), the IMD had got this right too. In pattern that the IMD had outweather -sensitive, even human retrospect, there was property loss due to lined. efficiency. Knowing how the Phailin, but loss of life was minimal. Thanks to next day or month is going to be IMD’s intervention, evacuation efforts had be- Mapping anew can help industries and businesses make their gun days before the cyclone hit Odisha and Since LS Rathore took over at the IMD two plans,” says Rathore.

Andhra Pradesh. years ago, there have been seven cyclones in At Mausam Bhavan, the IMD headquarters the subcontinent — Mahasen, Thane, Helen, on Delhi’s scenic Lodhi Road, there are a series On the right track Neelam, Lehar, Phailin and Madi. And in all of of portraits of previous IMD heads in the foyer, For Rathore and his team, the near-accurate these cases, the weathermen avoided any ma- including that of Sir John Eliot, the first direcprediction was only one of the more visible jor loss of life by making accurate forecasts, or tor general. Appointed in May 1889, Eliot could qualitative outputs of an ongoing process. by getting close enough to the predicted have scarcely predicted the fair weather at the “Phailin was relatively easy, it was Madi which ground location.

Mausam Bhavan today. Had he been alive, pergave us a lot of trouble,” says BK BandyopadFollowing the creation of the Ministry of haps, he might have even carried his umbrelhyay, a senior scientist at the department, add- Earth Sciences (MoES) in 2005, a modernisa- la, if the IMD’s forecast was cloudy with a ing, “Madi was more difficult because it tion plan in three phases (at a reported budget chance of rain. changed direction before hitting the coast.” of ₹920 crore) was put into force in 2009. “Two Hot property Rishi and Desaiwithin who made the topsibi five arasu at Masterchef Australia last year On the morning of December 6, when M phases were completed theit to next Eastern vortex An image of Cyclone Phailin as it makes landfall

joanna van gruisen

A BUTTERFLY BREEZE FROM MP

Waste not, want not

The contents of our garbage may have changed over the years, but we haven’t

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taying in a rural area, away from civic amenities, many aspects of life are brought into sharper focus. Waste and rubbish are major ones. There is no daily or weekly collector to remove it all from your door. (Nothing like having all your rubbish at home to concentrate and encourage thoughtful and cautious use, promoting zero waste.)

It hit us early: our first task was trying to keep the Sarai’s building site clean of non-biodegradable waste. Gutka packets would appear on every path, the sheen of their tiny squares seemed to glisten under every blade of grass.

How I longed for those pre-packaging days of the India I arrived in. So hard to believe now, but 35 years ago when I first

Chasing the storm

After predicting Phailin’s landfall last year, barely 3km off the mark, a near impossible feat, the Indian Meteorology Department is enjoying its season in the sun

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After the storm

As Masterchef Australia gears up for a new season this summer, Rishi Desai, a top contender for the title last year, talks about life after the cameras are turned off

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Men of science M Mohapatra, head, Cyclone Forecast Division; and (top) LS Rathore, director-general, both at the Indian Meteorological Department (IMD) in Delhi ramesh sharma

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DILLI DARBAR

It’s all about Mr Modi A ‘presidential’ twist to the parliamentary election has the analysts worried and the regional parties in a flurry

Man of the moment Narendra Modi at a rally in Meerut in the lead-up to the elections rajeev bhatt

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SANJAYA BARU’S book The Accidental Prime Minister: The Making and Unmaking of Manmohan Singh will be published later this year

ith 70 days left for a new government to take charge in Delhi, it is now clear that these general elections will be about whether India wants Narendra Modi to be prime minister or not. The answer to that one single question will determine the outcome of the poll.

So it is not surprising that the Bharatiya Janata Party’s entire campaign strategy has been about projecting the image of its vote-gatherer. So what if Lal Krishna Advani doesn’t like this. Who cares if the Congress mocks this?

Whatever the opposition may say, this is the bare fact of these elections. No wonder Arvind Kejriwal has chosen to directly target Modi.

In almost every State, even regional political parties are being forced to define their political platform on these terms. Interestingly, not every regional party has fallen into this trap.

Nitish Kumar’s haste in Bihar has made others cautious. While Uttar Pradesh’s Mulayam Singh Yadav has had no option but to define his platform as an anti-Modi one, West Bengal’s Mamata Banerjee has been less strident in so defining hers. In Andhra Pradesh (the State is still called that!) and Tamil Nadu, regional party leaders have all fudged the issue.

The Telugu Desam Party, YSR Congress and even the Telangana Rashtra Samithi leaders have kept their options open without positioning themselves against Modi. In Tamil Nadu, while DMK supremo Karunanidhi has warmed up to Modi, Jayalalithaa has truly distorted the issue, targeting the Congress and the DMK, while remaining silent on Modi.

Some political analysts have been critical of this ‘presidential’ twist to a parliamentary election. Rahul Gandhi went a step further and offered a spurious theory, saying the Congress party always allows its parliamentary party to decide who would be PM! India’s general elections have, with a couple of exceptions, only been about who would preside over the Dilli Darbar.

What can, however, be said, is that every wheels by making the campaign ‘non-presinow and then a ‘regional’ leader may spoil the dential’. Perhaps, even very municipal. grand strategies that define a national camIn the very seat of the Dilli Darbar, very local paign. The late YS Rajasekhara Reddy did just factors have helped the emergence of a new that in 2004. That election was about Atal Bi- ‘regional’ challenge to the national campaignhari Vajpayee getting another term. While So- er. Other regional leaders are playing the old nia Gandhi led the Congress campaign, she game of projecting themselves as potential was not claiming the top job. In fact, the Con- PMs to mobilise local support for themselves. gress warped the issue after Gandhi burnt her Telugu Desam founder NT Rama Rao did that fingers in 1999, staking claim to form a govern- when he formed a National Front and projectment with the support of “272” MPs. ed himself as a prime ministerial aspirant to The BJP’s defeat in Delhi was engineered by ensure re-election in Hyderabad. The Left YSR’s victory in Hyderabad. The dramatic de- Front did that with Jyoti Basu in Bengal in 1996 feat of Chandrababu Naidu’s Telugu Desam to ensure CPM’s re-election at the State level. government in Andhra Pradesh, on the back of Except that comrade Basu took the campaign a campaign that YSR crafted and led, ensured seriously and thought he should become the that the Congress got enough seats in the Lok prime minister. The politburo had to purge Sabha to form a coalition governhim of such ambitions. ment. The voters of Andhra PraThis time round every State desh took an electoral decision leader pretends he/she can be the based entirely on their local prefnext Deve Gowda. However, if the erences, however, in the process, Can regional politics latest CNN IBN, Lokniti, opinion they made a difference to the na- play a spoiler in this poll is reflective of public sentiyear’s national tional outcome. ment, the strategy is not yet workelections? That is The Congress’ long-standing ing. In Tamil Nadu, for example, the game in town political enemy, the Communist the poll shows that both ‘national Party of India (Marxist), then deleaders’, Rahul Gandhi and Nacided that an enemy’s enemy rendra Modi, are running ahead could be a friend and offered supof the regional one, J Jayalalithaa port to the Congress to keep the of the AIADMK. Her party’s atBJP out. In short, the dynamics of the parlia- tempt to project her as a potential PM has not mentary system worsened the tactics of a pres- yet helped her gain traction. idential campaign.

In Bihar, UP and West Bengal, regional parCan regional politics play a spoiler in this ties are using the same strategy of projecting year’s national elections in April? Can victory their leaders as potential PMs to garner supin the Dilli Darbar be shaped by the local pref- port. If they succeed, the elections will lose erences of some distant electorate? That is the their ‘presidential’ sheen. However, so far that game in town. has not happened. Even in defining their platHaving come to terms with the fact that the forms, Nitish Kumar, Mulayam Singh Yadav Lok Sabha elections are indeed going to be and now, even Mayawati, have all had to refer presidential, and the single most important to Narendra Modi. So, this election is already question for a great majority of the voters will about him. Time Lal Krishna Advani underbe whether or not they want Narendra Modi to stood that! preside over the Dilli Darbar, his opponents sanjaya_baru@hotmail.com will naturally want to throw sand in his

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Quiet waters Filomena (seated centre) seldom revealed the storms that raged within from

ELSEWHERE

filomena’s journeys

Coffee emergencies Banking on Bitcoins

sorrows at BLink compiles everything you wanted to know about this cryptocurrency, Sharing but werelives tooand tech-shy to ask Dunkin’ Donuts

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Familial lives

“H

ome say that it’s going to revolu- way as paper money. Bitcoins are also traditional stock dealers, the idea is to The company finally filed for bankruptI say, stepping out28, theand front door of my tionise the global monetary sys- available in a physical form in some buy low and sell high to reap maximum i, Pete,” cy in Tokyo on February reported are you?”

My750,000 next-door neightem, while others argue that it’s cases. But its primary form continues to returns. Other uses — legal and illegal — building. that they“How had lost almost of its the oneBitcoins I think of “Sparrow Man”, is nothing but another clever cyb- be data; you can use it to buy things on- exist all over the internet. Bitcoinmagazi- bour, customers’ andasabout 100,000 up against theup cold.

The pale beak of er-ponzi scheme. Whatever it is, Bitcoins line, peer to peer, using wallet softwares ne.com lists many options in various bundled of its own.

It added to about seven his nose pokes from the blue hood of his jacket. price categories where the mined or outper have changed the way the world per- or an online service. cent offaded all existing Bitcoins and was so good,” he says.around I look again.

His largeIn brown eyes are bought Bitcoin can be spent“Not — anything ceives currency online and off it. worth $473 million. a followWhere does it come from? with tears. up statement, Mt Gox said, “The compafrom paying for online filled dating (okcuIn the news for the wrong reasons of thebelieves doctor,”there he tells “Theypossibility can’t treat me are created as of a repid.com)employto buying a house. “Just been to seeny late — with the bankruptcy onedecade of the ofBitcoins isme. a high orn in theoffirst the 20th advent or of “mined” a new era professional no more.”

His medical insurance has runstolen.” out on him. “I’m only sult of complex number crunching by and a theGregory Simon, Banker, largest Bitcoin exchanges, Mt Gox,Borges last de that the Bitcoins were century, Filomena Figueirement, private enterprise spread of the an American 61, you know?” that makes him just one year older network of computers.

This process cur-paved forthe instance, quit decided to In 2012, week — the cryptocurrency made a quick With the increasing popularity of Bit-than do’s extraordinary life begins in the English language, which way for a his job and me.Bitcoins “I don’t to wanna die! many But without theand drugs …” He setshrugs.

25 Bitcoins every 10 created min- shift to Nicaragua. recovery, however. hasGoarently coins, phishing malware village of“Bitcoin Raia in south wherecreates she social upheaval and a generation of He used Maybe onespecifically year. He tells me he has Hepatitis A her predetermined of 21 pay for 0.3 acretoof land in Six themonths. new counshrugged offwith Mt Gox’s death and rattle” re- utes. — ups targeting Bitcoin usersC. lives her siblings grandmother displacedupper elites,limit hitherto accustomed “C’mon, I’ll buyare us coming coffee,” up I say.asOur building shares the million is expected to beprivileges. reached inCuoto the invokes try. Houses at the Hamptons near New ported Forbes.com, even in as the reassuring exchange clasp well.

A DellSecureAvo. Embedded of this boundless the examparking lot with Works a Dunkin’ Donuts café.that Halfthere an hour year 2140. that the musician total number of Chico YorkFigueiredo and the Alberta Province in Canada rate to the dollar continued be an eyereport estimates are atlater, world, and throughto a babble of Konkani, Por-After ple of her father — we’re Bitcoins. sitting inside the150 glass-walled eatery with its pink-andBitcoinsimwill stay unchanged. can also be bought now using poppingtuguese $550 (approx.) a Bitcoin. Latin, Filomena least kinds of malware designed speand occasional an effusive, gifted individual with a proud anorange He gets a regular, with milk and extra sugar, I get a Therewill are two waysand to get hands Even Richard the logo.

Virgin Already a common fixturenourishment in online cifically to steal Bitcoins. bibes the spiritual that cestry his your heartbreaking errors, when itBranson of regular with amilk, no sugar. He tries to pay for the treat but Bitcoins. The easyto way is to purchase Group has decided to give customers trade, the Bitcoin’s success story shelter her later in life.

Hermay eldeston daughter comes confronting a new and bewildering What does the future hold? gives in when them by signing uparrangement. for online “Wallet” chance to buy a seat on the Virgin Galac-I show him I have a $25 gift card from my sister, not be over yet.

So as Cuoto long as you Maria Aurora will godon’t on to recreate her social for coffee emergencies.

With many countries and corporations services——a Mywallet and are depiction tic using of Bitcoins! throw away your digital currency in the Journeys milieu and trajectory in Filomena’s Despite itsCoinbase encyclopaedic a byWe sit at an orange table. Sunlight in the while other now willing to acceptstreams Bitcoins, curamong the more popular the mo-uncovers the mystibin — like James Howells Wales, composition that of is as muchwho a family memoir gone epoch,sites the at narrative Why should you care? customers ebb and flow around Petestrong. talks about his life. He rency’s future us. looks The Indian ment. Once signed up and linkwhile cleaning up his table, away culture as a reflection of an threw effervescent pin- you calhave force that brought together Filomena and Withover e-tailing the pregot infected whilesituation workingisatstill a local hospital.

“I used to be a unclear though.

The Reyour—existing bank parents. Poring a hard drive a digital wallet ionedcontaining against a mercurial society. ed it to one ofChico the author’s old becoming ferred male of nurse. getting sick. Finally IndiaKept issued an advisory accounts,ofyoufamily can buy or sellnewspaper articles and with 7,500Anchored Bitcoins (worth by herover Avo $7.5 and milan assortment journals, con- way of shopping and serve Bank selling, regardless of wheth- against they my blood.

It wasand Hep C.” thechecked use of virtual currency lion) — you might still end cashing in Bitcoins as you please. uncles, aunts and up cousins, “Filsultations with distant relatives, er you’re a business analyst statedThat’s nickname for plans the disease. that ithis doesn’t have any of The hard way is to “mine”Cuoto succeeds in reconstructon the “Bitcoin omena revolution”. seems to have carried all You can even buy or just someone looking regulating “Some Bitcoin people get completely cured usage.

Currently the passion and warmth of her Bitcoins. This is similar toing a the lives of her parents.

Six months. Maybe ticket to space on What is a Bitcoin? to pick up a pair of head- there are butover I’m not oneactive of ’em.”

He was briefly 2,000 Indian users early life in Raia into her rela- mining for gold. But hereWhilethe reviewing events of the a year. He tells me Virgin Galactic On November 1, 2008 a research paper you’re scouring the web forpast, she is besieged by the paraphones, it is good to keep of Bitcoins, in the military. a wife.largest A son. Got but with“Had the third tionships in later life,” observes he has Hepatitis C using Bitcoins was posted by one Satoshi Nakamoto on 64-digit numbers. By get-dox that defined Chico’s life. For with the trend, currency- number divorced.

Never seein my son.” He of internet users the world Cuoto while retracing her mothan obscure listserv titled ting your computer to solve shrugs. the “Now I’m here, in Newport.” number of Bitcoin user’s cryptographic path. someone with social graces wise and too. Besides, the ano- (150 million), ‘Bitcoin: AThe Peer-to-Peer Cash puzzles constantly, you acan nymity does odd-jobs. is expected to shootFor up. instance, he trail leadsElectronic her to a period strong sense of propriety, Chi- of the Bitcoin service — ers tooHe System’.that Traditionally, of Bit- compete with other minersco which isofwhat makes it scary for theargue hallway and stairs in our No cleans one can against another to genwitnessedthe an origins enlightening “had little experience coins areinteraction traced backbetween to this paper. can work in your favour too. building and getsapocalyptic a monthly online retainerevent fromthat old Mrs takesRose, the the Bitcoin outside net- many the Nakaearly erate the number that theworlds his —extended moto (an alias, the identityand of work is on the lookout family landlady. He paints windows. he tires easily. thethe Hep C. whole thingBut down.

At the same“It’s time, for. If and your his class” and reconverts, theoriginal landed gentry What are the risks?

Filomena’s Journeys it, you the person as yet unknown) proposed Can’t do so much precise no more.” engineering of the Bitcoin sysgenerates receive 25 throes of an incurtheismissionaries; and the subse- computer mained in the A portrait of aismarriage, Barely is not with- Trevor, the creation of digital is conbrother lives in theand flatanonymous adjacent to mine, tem,who its finiteness set- is This a tall orderable though, and most quent birth money of an that ethos en- Bitcoins. alienation ofsix hisyears life. old, Bitcoin His a family and a culture out its risks and is very much work-in- with venient grained and untraceable, liberated from miners also adivorced, children he never sees. “I did up,two gives it an whom edge over traditional often this in groups, sharing in cultural assimilation With characteristic courage Maria Aurorado Couto progress.

As the the oversight of governments and theCategory: somehighlightbad things currencies in the military,” says Pete.

“I was digital locked up. and other attempted spoils Memoir between themselves.

While and community bonding. While Filomena’s daughter recalls herMt Gox fiasco user couldBut losethey a lot banks. One that could all theof usual let of me out.”

Sitting as in well. the bright, coffee-scented café currencies might reduce theirchildhood individualdaysed, ina Bitcoin traversing theavoid brickwork the thisAleph Dharwar, ₹495 due to events thatit’s arehard not under problems thatGoan arisesocial whenorder, making on- yields, at least it ensures some to associateEven any heinous crimes experiment with this fragile, if the Bitcoin fails,birdsort ofup re-withmoney early Cuoto growing six traumatised his control as well. Mt Gox, line payments. like created man. Hisinskinthe is translucent.

His eyes are fever-bright. technological innovations — such as He they invest. finds a feudal, agrarian system turn for the time and effortsiblings, a grief-stricken mother 2011 as a father.

Bitcoin exchange,empties grew totwo hanThe basic underpinning Bitmorethe packets of sugar into Bitmessage cli- his coffee.

Satoshi mined the even first tyrannical that premise was non-coercive and encouraged gener-Nakomoto and an had authoritarian, over 70 per world’sstill Bit-alive,” coin’s potential success between is that because it block(bhatsays. The old man lives in Providence, ent,hewhich allows of BitcoinsBound or “genesis block”, ous dialogues the landlords within the with pages ofdlethe book, is acent of the “Dad’s April 2013. north of Elsewhere, is decentralised not issued by any the in the family home. “It was a users tofour-bedroom receive a reward bitcoins. Negotiations kars) andand the peasants (mundkars), faithfulof 50photograph of Filomenatowithcoin hertrades seven by chilOn February withdrawals government, in theory, it isthe free from inplace to grow up.”send Their mother died years ago, but the and efix temple. the value ofdren, the first few and the converts, church and the taken intransactions 1956. She sits serenely, clutching7, 2014, allgreat were halted

by Mt Gox. The company is- had terference andhere manipulation, unlike thein the father, now 97, a 98-year-old mails anony-girlfriend. “She used to love to were done onher Bitcoin forums; From on, the book basks pleasuryoungest son, notable belying perhaps the storm sued statement saying, go “A out bugdancing. in the They world’s tangible fiat currencies.

In severhad a—great mously it time, my dad and her.” Then among them was trade of a pizza for faced able duality of unravelling Filomena’s world thatthe rages within.

Having thea crushing bitcoin software possible al ways and however, it worksthe in mise the same had an for accident passed hasand helped fos- away suddenly, a few months 10,000 Bitcoins. elucidating en scene that BTC sil- ordisappointment of her husband’s decline, she makes itshe someone to raisuse the Bitcoin to someone ago.network “He’s seeing new to now. But she don’t like to dance ter, are sure houetted her thinking and her exploits. is confronted with the daunting task of What is it used for? alter transaction it seem much.”

Still, she’s in her ’80s. A spry young thing! carryonly the legacy In Cuoto’s previous work, Goa: A Daughter’s ing seven children. Cuoto, awestruck by her details tosomake A Bitcoin can be used forendurance many purposes sendinganof Bitcoins to a Bitcoin “There’s time yet,”ofsays Pete. this cryptocurStory, she established her native land as an inmother’s has not like onlyacharted but its most important continues towhere, wallet“Filomena did not occur when in it did Wefact laugh, finishrency our coffees and go our separate ways. forward. imitable pivot of culture and learning, invalincredibleusecampaign be the buying seemed and selling of it.with Muchand likeyet occur.”

It wasthe all downhill from there. idating the hackneyed platitudes her people to live float above Manjula Padmanabhan, author and artist, tells us tales of her parallel life in are most often exposed to. Here, she carries on dire realities from which she protected her Elsewhere, USA, in this fortnightly series. marginalien.blogspot.in in the same vein, weaving a tableau of the peri- young children,” but also scanned a society od and social context. Giving a detailed ac- that continues to embellish India’s cultural count of the economic liberalisation of Goa landscape in its own unique way. (which at times makes for dreary reading) in the first decades of the century, she traces the urmi sengupta is a freelance writer based in Mumbai

The story of a mother, which also tells of the history and culture of Goa

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Quirky, magnetic, very Indian They are the couple who sold a house to live their entrepreneurial dream…

Meet the founders of Chumbak, creators of uber-cool desi knick-knacks

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Stock of ideas Vivek Prabhakar, CEO, Chumbak at his office in Bangalore grn

somashekar

t’s almost a Bollywood story. The lead pair has a dream: to run a business selling quirky knick-knacks with an Indian feel and soul. As they don’t have much money, they sell their house to set up the business.

And like in the movies, their products become a hit. Money starts pouring in and they are rolling in profits within six months. In the next three years, their products go international; and in certain circles, it becomes uncool to not know of Chumbak — the Bangalore-based start-up that has made owls, elephants and moustaches trendy.

In 2010, husband-wife duo Vivek Prabhakar and Shubhra Chadda began Chumbak to manufacture fridge magnets that foreign visitors could buy as souvenirs from India. “But we soon realised that we would have to sell millions of them for a viable business model,” says Prabhakar, who is Chumbak’s CEO. Family and friends chipped in with more innovative ideas. Somebody suggested T-shirts with an India theme, another mentioned coasters. “We began with six categories, including coffee mugs, key chains and coasters.

Since we were a design brand, not necessarily in the souvenir space, we started looking at options like bags and furnishings,” he says.

The ₹40 lakh from the sale of their Bangalore house became their seed capital. They

moved to a rented apartment and began working from there — discussing ideas with designers and commissioning products. And when business outgrew the house-cum-warehouse, Prabhakar and Chadda moved to an aunt’s place. “From there, we moved to a warehouse within a year,” he says.

were checking it out without us paying for it.

That was great for a start-up,” says Prabhakar.

Chumbak’s strategy from day one was to not push products down people’s throat. He says, “The reason our social media strategy worked is that we didn’t look at it as something that required a return on investments. When the focus is only Powered by likes on getting fans, the quality of inUnlike most manufacturers, teraction suffers.” Social media alChumbak first created the merso proved handy for customer In the next year or chandise and then approached two, online will play service. “People would get in retailers. “Some stores agreed to touch with us online. It helped a stronger role, but stock our products. One thing build loyalty.” Even now, ChumI don’t see it going that worked (for us) was that bak doesn’t rely on aggregators to beyond 30 per cent there was nothing like this in the sell online. “We ship directly and market. Retailers lapped up our deliver within 24 hours,” he says. products and we got traction But while social media may early. After 8-10 stores, people have boosted Chumbak’s popstarted getting in touch with us and the net- ularity, especially among the youth, only 22 work expanded,” he says. This rapid growth per cent of its sales comes from online. “We was despite the presence of brands like Happi- built the brand on social media. But we are not ly Unmarried and Play Clan, which also offer Chumbak.com. We are Chumbak,” says Prabsomewhat similar India-centric knick-knacks. hakar, adding, “In the next year or two, online Chumbak now has more than 2 lakh likes will play a stronger role but I don’t see it going on Facebook, the platform that helped make it beyond 30 per cent. It is a hybrid model and what it is today. “One of our biggest advantag- we are comfortable with it.” es in 2010 was Facebook. The FB page back then was very different, as it was not focused Quirks unlimited on advertising. So if I posted a product, people For now, the company is focusing on adding more product categories and making them more widely available. New products and categories are decided based on the kind of business they can fetch. “We did it for fun in the first year, but at the end of it, we started taking calls around pricing, usage and how displayable a product was at stores.”

Phone cases, which didn’t even exist as a category at Chumbak even about six months ago, are now bringing in 30 per cent of its revenues. It now has more than 30 product categories including bobble-heads, boxer shorts, cushion covers, bags and laptop sleeves.

For wider distribution, rather than shops, Chadda and Prabhakar are now banking on kiosks within malls as that is more economical for them. “Chumbak is an impulse purchase, not a planned one. We tested the first one, a 150 sq ft kiosk at the Forum mall in Bangalore. Just two weeks of data was enough for us to expand the format,” says Prabhakar.

Chumbak now operates 14 kiosks and expects to close the fiscal with 20.

After that, Chumbak will pause and think matters over for a few months . “We’re putting in place technology to better understand trends on design,” he says. Now, that should be a magnet for more curious customers.

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PRESENT IMPERFECT

Equal rights and free cocktails

Oddballs are the best

When candyfloss commercialisation shoves away the robust origins of Women’s Day Author Sally Gardner learned to read at 14. Today she is one of the leading writers of children’s books. Here she reveals her love for ‘the’ and scorn for all things adult

For you the dreamers Overlooked at school Never won prizes You who will own tomorrow.

the book is devoid of these same illustrations, because “adults can’t cope” with them. Gardner explains, “Children have much more open minds. They have a more philosophical outlook on life and they are much more able to f you don’t do well at school, people run with an idea. Adults tend to make concluquickly assume that you are unremarkasions and that shortens their lives or their ble, perhaps a wierdo, and that your life imaginative lives. I love dealing with people will never amount to much. For a large whose imagination is very healthy and active.” majority of us, the experience of school meant Imagination, Gardner believes, saved her. sitting in the audience and clapping, while She says, “Imagination showed me a world others went up on stage to receive prizes. Authat I had invented in my head. The possibility thor Sally Gardner was one of those chairof doing much more than I ever thought I warmers. Today, she is the author of nine and Way of seeing could do. It also gave me all my stories.” StoBottoms up The Kim illustrator of several more children’s books, Standish is not good at spelling or reading but ries that sheltered Kardashianisation of her from bullies and reand has won the Costa Children’s Book award he can “hear words”, he can “squeeze the es- moved herDay from daily travails. m vedhan Women's (2012) and the Carnegie Medal (2013) for Mag- sence out of them”. You see, like his creator, Gardner learned to read at 14. She attended got Moon (Hot Keys Book), which tells of a less Sally Gardner, he is an “image thinker” or, in a school for children with behavioural probthan perfect schoolboy. Maggot Moon is dedi- boring adult language, dyslexic. For Gardner lems (long shut now) even though she had a 013 was the year of rage-inducing femiWhat irks me about this whole celebration When I told people off for annoying me by cated to those who the system sneered at, who dyslexia is a “way of seeing” rather than a learning disability. She remembers the day nism. And rightly so. After the Delhi is that when it began, Women’s Day was a revo- wishing me Happy Women’s Day, they looked went on and will go on to own tomorrow. learning disability. In a Skype interview, prior when the words on the page suddenly fell into gang rape, it seemed, everything had lution, not an excuse to shop. In 1910, at a con- at me with the kind of revulsion ‘proud HinThis young adult book takes the reader hos- to her Bookaroo 2013 appearance, she says, place and sentences grew into stories. “I was in changed, yet nothing at all was differ- ference in Copenhagen, 100 women delegates dus’ seem to have for Wendy Doniger’s books. tage and catapults him/her into a dystopian “We (people with dyslexia) think in many this funny little hut with a tin roof. It was rainent. So when Women’s Day rolled along on from 17 countries decided to observe Woman’s “Geez, relax, we are only celebrating the many layers, that is why I am quite good at ing very very hard. And there was one boy on March 8, the marketing attempts at its so Day (sic) as a strategy to promote equal rights uniqueness that is us, okay,” one said with no world building.” the floor screaming. The noise level was becalled celebration of women, made me so an- for women. Equal rights. Not free gym member- trace of irony at all.

When Gardner looks at alphabets on the yond anything I could cope with. I just wanted gry that I threatened to slap people who ship. For the next few decades, Women’s Day Now a whole year has gone by and here we page, she doesn’t see the building blocks of to be gone. To be out of this place. I remember wished me Happy Women’s Day. It seemed to was a day of protest, of organising marches are again. You may have popped out a dozen words, or bits and bobs of language. Instead picking up this book (it was Wuthering Heights) me an easy way to trivialise these real issues of and speeches, inspiring women to ask for the times as you were reading this page to check she conjures up personalities with quirks. She and looking at it, and starting to read it with equality (lack of), safety (lack of) and misogy- right to vote, equal pay and an end to the vio- your phone for messages of love, support, and finds ‘schizophrenia’ particularly beautiful. my finger on the words and suddenly realised ny (plenty of). And nothing annoyed me more lence targeted at them. that most irritating of words applicable to this And is completely partial to ‘the’, “as it has a that everything had gone quiet. I was on the than how quickly marketers had jumped on It seems to me in the last few years, we have day, celebration. Nothing much has changed. lovely box-like shape to it”. She doesn’t like moors, it was snowing, it was very frightening. the bandwagon and managed to make it all taken the short slippery road down from the Just this week, newspapers reported that the words which crawl across the page, never And I was no longer in the school.” commercial and no substance.

Day’s idealistic and aggressive origins to Nirbhaya Fund — set up after the Delhi gang stretching out an arm or a leg. ‘Because’ really If reading parachuted her out of the conThe communication frenzy around Wom- candyfloss commercialism. We are not just rape — is lying unutilised. Even the 24-hour gets her goat as does ‘Sarah’ — her birth name. fines of school, her imagination also scared en’s Day starts at least a fortnight prior. For trivialising the issues that brought forth this women’s helpline that was set up in the CapiShe could never spell it, as it sprawled across her bullies witless. One day, tired with the some reason, technology companies seem to revolution, but in a race to buy tal — where more than 1,500 optithe page like an unheeding slug. She could name-calling and backstabbing of the girls in be the earliest assaulters. Last year, Microsoft discounted designer wear, we mistic women call in and seek never figure where the ‘h’ went, “It just walked her boarding school she told them a story. Not sent me a mail on February 28, wishing me an don’t even see that more than 100 help every day — is in imminent all over the place. And it seemed any old story. But that of a hand “Appy” Women’s Day (quotes theirs). “Mother, years after the first Women’s Day danger of being shut down as to have boots on. And it didn’t ev- When it began, creeping up the stairs slowly, sister, girlfriend, wife, daughter — it’s almost was marked, notions such as staff salaries have not been paid er belong to me,” she laments. Women’s A and then throttling the Day was a sincequietly impossible to decode their ‘want’ DNA, isn’t it? equal pay and prevention of vioDecember. friend suggested the name ‘Sally’revolution, not an bunch of them. Their cries woke However, Windows gives you a shot at flooring lence against women are as abEvery day there are reports of and she adopted it at once as it excuse the matron and they never dared shopto make Adultstotend her. There’s a variety of apps you can choose sent now as they were then. In real multiple rapes and monstrous breathed with life. She says, “‘S’ is bully Gardner again. Now that conclusions and from in making her feel good about herself terms, when you take into acmolestations. After the case of the a snake and is a squiggle, the ‘ll’s she is a famous author the old that shortens their and her world” it said. Maybe it was me; maybe count education and social evolueditor who was arrested for what have two long limbs and the ‘y’ is girls invited her back to their lives or their he did it was the general sense of gloom prevalent tion, the state of women around to a young journalist in an to catch it in.” school as a chief guest. To which imaginative lives then, but giving anyone “a shot at flooring the world now is perhaps worse elevator ride that lasted 196 secWhen alphabets can have such Gardner retorted, “I have no deher” seemed so wrong that it set the mood for than it was in 1910. Yet, we don’t care. We onds went public, human resources heads of rich lives it is not surprising that sire to be part of your old girl netthe teeth-gritting week that was to follow. would rather grab our discounted liposuction companies say in private, that hiring women Gardner’s books and characters work.” When they wrote back The celebrations of “womanhood” came in coupons that help us get into our discounted employees is now often not worth the trouble. have even denser interior lives. saying, “we remember you fondwaves. Discounts on diamond jewellery and little black dresses and head out for a Women’s Forget equal pay, truth is, there aren’t even Maggot Moon is never muffled by a young- ly”, she replied “the past is a foreign land.” diamanté sandals. Free diet plans and mega Day special event at the local hip bar, where we equal jobs anymore. adult-reader mandate. If anything, it heaves While school might not have been a particusaver coupons on cord-blood storage. Invita- hope someone interesting — ideally richer and And yet again, the emails extolling the celewith carmine violence, meted out by teachers larly happy time for Gardner, she never altions to seminars on work-home balance and taller than us — will come over and strike up a bration of women have started pouring in. on students, by students on fellow students. lowed it to define her and hopes that children whether investment banking is an ideal pro- conversation by telling us that no matter This year though, I am more sanguine about Gardner never humiliates her readers by talk- reading her book will realise the same. She fession for women. The poor PR professional what, to him, every day is Women’s Day. There my anger about the day and everything it now ing down to them. The edition for young read- found peace, even inspiration, in theatre. Havwho made the mistake of calling me, in order is nothing more vacuous than this. Yet the Kim stands for. It is a determination borne of deers includes illustrations at the bottom of the ing worked as a set designer for 15 years, she to enquire if I’ve received the email offering Kardashianising of Women’s Day is perfectly feat, certainly. Even if we give it a 100 more page, which show the circle of life. Not believes the stage moulded her into the writer up her lone woman CEO client as an interview legit and seems to be perfectly approved by years, it seems to me, not much is likely to through pretty whimsies, but through a rat she is today. Theatre taught her timing, prospect (standard industry practice, no one even perfectly intelligent seeming women. change. What’s the point fuming then? May as sniffing its way to a bottle of poison, falling rhythm, speech, dialogue and the most imdistrusts email services as much as PR profesAngst-ridden and frustrated by this loss of a well enjoy the free cocktails. dead, a fly landing on its nose, a fly laying mag- portant trade of all — how to ambush your ausionals do) got such an earful from me, it is en- cause, by the time it was actually Women’s Day, gots in its mouth, the rat being consumed by dience and keep them coming back for more. tirely possible she switched careers.

I couldn’t even bear to be social and polite. t@veenavenugopal the maggots and a fly finally breaking free from the maggot cocoon. The adult version of nandini nair

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Image thinker Sally Gardner, author of the shocking and entertaining Maggot Moon

world of an orphaned boy who is looked after by his grandfather. Standish Treadwell is the boy with one blue and one green eye, who could never tie his laces and is always in a mess. When his best friend Hector vanishes, he and his grandfather rebel to defeat the leather-clad villains of the Motherland, even if it means risking limb and life. This book might turn savage in parts, it might appear outrageous, but through it all you want to shake hands with the protagonist and say, “I know you… I have known you all along.”

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UNDISCOVERED COUNTRY

The part-time dacoit Criminality in rural India can be funny at times, sad at others, and invariably complex

On track Rent from tractors loaned to neighbouring farms often oil the wheels of life in a farm

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Omair Ahmad is an author. His last book was on Bhutan

andey was a part-time dacoit, or so I heard. It might have just been rumour, but Pandey never denied it.

Other than the moustache he liked to twirl, and the grin, he really did not look the part. He was a small man, five-foot nothing, and innocent of any air of aggression. On the other hand, I must confess that he never mugged me or anybody that I know, so maybe when he was off the farm, hidden in the bushes waiting to ambush a victim, he changed completely. My only knowledge of him was through the story of his larcenous work at our farm in UP. One way to earn money from a tractor in rural India is to rent out its use to those who don’t have one. They pay for the diesel and the labour done. The driver pockets half the money and the rest is set aside for maintenance of the tractor and other such sundry expenses that are the bane of farming life. Pandey did the odd job for the neighbouring farms, but if nobody was around he’d pocket the full payment and neglect to inform anybody about it.

The tractor was perpetually short of fuel and in constant need of some small repair work or the other.

He would be caught once in a while, when my parents would arrive at the farmhouse and find the tractor’s engine still warm from work, and newly made marks from the huge tyres as obvious incriminating evidence. He would bow his head and grin uneasily at the harangues that would be his due, but since they had no actual proof, and since nobody at the farm would speak against him, he was able to continue his little escapades.

It didn’t make him a rich man, neither this nor his rumoured night-time activities. He was a poor man in one of the less prosperous parts of a poor country, it would have taken much more than petty larceny for him to be able to break through the barriers that life had

set in front of him. Had he indulged in racke- er, as a former school principal, made it a habit teering, murder, kidnapping and other assort- of asking children which class they studied in, ed mafia-related activities, he might have and rewarded them with small change for become rich and powerful. Maybe even power- candy when they were able to tell her what ful enough to run for local elections and be- they were learning. It wasn’t very much, just come a Minister of State as other more enough to get them candy at the corner store, ambitious criminals from the city have done; but the children loved their small rewards. For but Pandey was not a city man, nor did he op- the two miles from the main road to the farm erate on that scale. we would be followed by cries of, “Salaam, BehHe lived in a little thatched hut not far away ni! Salaam Babu!” from the railway tracks that ran behind the So Pandey had two miles of warning that farm. He had (illegally, of course,) expropriat- day when he found himself working on a farm ed a small patch of land on which he was grow- that he wasn’t supposed to be. In his panic he ing some crops. tried to drive straight back to the farm from Though he stole some from my family, we the field he was working at. Instead of taking found it difficult to summon great bitterness the road he tried to go over the railway tracks for his deeds. My mother often straight from the field. As things said, “Either they are intelligent would have it, the gradient was and cheat you, or they are incomtoo high and the undercarriage petent and will make a mess of evlodged in the tracks at such an anerything. The best of them have gle that he could neither go over, My parents would long left the farmlands to make a nor reverse. find the tractor’s better life in the cities.”

In complete despair, he realised engine still warm But it did cause a problem. It is that the only way that he could from work, and hard to pay higher-than-average present himself at the farmhouse fresh tyre marks wages for long, especially when was by abandoning the tractor on you know your people are cheatthe rail tracks to the delicate mining you. My parents tried often to istrations of any train coming upskill the workers at the farm, along. He did the only thing that give them more opportunity. For example he could do. He got down from the tractor and they paid for Pandey to get his Heavy Motor Ve- spread himself before the machine to be in the hicle Licence and he used it to work for them, way of any oncoming train. “Mai Behni ka and he used it to steal from them, simply be- saamna nahin kar sakta!” he wailed, unwilling cause he could. to face my mother after abandoning the tracOnce, though, Pandey got caught. My par- tor to potential destruction. ents only lived at the farm at the time of high My parents found him at the railway tracks, activity, during harvest and sowing, otherwise got the tractor unstuck, and Pandey continthey travelled back and forth. With my moth- ued to work for us. This is the criminality in ruer’s diabetes, it would have been impossible to ral India, funny at times, sad at others, always stay for too long, as the unreliable electricity far more complex than any theory of it that I meant that her insulin injections were hard to have heard described in urban India. maintain. But whenever my parents came to t@OmairTAhmad the farm, they would be announced. My moth-

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India’s funniest man Natural

Final cut Director Joshua Oppenheimer hopes that The Act of Killing will expose society’s villainy afp / brendan smialowski

From farmers in Bihar to college students in Mumbai, everybody loves him. We unlock Kapil Sharma’s success as he now readies for a role in films

born killers N

ot too long ago, before he one, while the other was reserved for the enter- February, Comedy Nights (with 8.4 TVM) was had tasted stardom, Kapil tainers. In his trademark style, which the nation the fourth most watched show on Indian teleSharma performed at intim- has now come to adore, Sharma belted out his vision, ahead of India has Got Talent 5. A young ate social gatherings and “Punjabi-flavoured jokes”. Sadly, they fell flat. The assistant peers into her laptop, announcing parties to earn a living. On one oc- largely NRI audience was not tickled by his hu- embarrassing facts about the actors coming casion, he was invited by a Tami- mour. “Not a single person was listening to me. I on the next day’s show, while someone jots lian businessman to regale his was sweating with nervousness. I was sure my em- these down on a large white board. The meetguests at a ceremony where his ployers would refuse to pay me for doing such a ing is interrupted by Sharma’s arrival. They teen daughter was made to bad job. But then Sunidhi Chauhan went on to queue up to hug him in turns, even though it wear her first-ever half-sari. At perform after me and she got an even worse re- has been only a couple of hours since they last the time, Sharma had just sponse. There was also a magician from Moscow. met. “I just got up from sleep. I usually shoot emerged victorious in The Somehow people liked him. I think he managed through the night and sleep during the day,” he Act of Killing, Joshua Op- Tell us about the film’s reception.

And it’shedone so, in part, because Great Indiantrators Laughter impress theThe girl’s chacha,” says wistfully. showed howwith he killed viche says, aster hehe enters a room ‘Boss’ his carved thanChalwe’d to like to think. penheimer’s documen- Many countries, for instance they human beings and in being He is relieved to have putare such incidents behind lenge (2009), one of nine realtim on using wires), it was an bold letters its door. perpetrators are human, including tary on the 1965-66 mass Germany and the US, have human they right Inside, and three liking you,know they what’s listen to ity television their shows he has him. “Once people start extraordinary example of impunity, visitors are comfortably sprawmorality. killings in Indonesia, took suppressed parts of their wrong. To avoid living most exactly won.

The hall rented for the func- everything you in say,” what’s says Sharma. own what athe survivors had told led across leather couch.

“Please Even nationality plays a part the film festival circuit by storm af- history. Did you sense that of their lives in anguish, like Adi Zul- memeet tioninwas elevated After thisare rather hurtful experience, thefitted with earlier. this boasting, you find myIn college friends from Amthe two practice of evil.

These some ter its release in 2013. Screened at way audiences reacted? kadry (Anwar platforms facing other.truths he isthat chuffed a ro- Congo’s friend) who a metaphor regime of impuniritsar,” hefor tellsa me, adding, “I have of theeach painful the about film garnering more than 100 film festivals, picking It’s very specific. You can’t see broad uncovers. in the film that killing is the ty. always bust fan following insays south India.

The religious So, instead moving to anhadof the sameon set of For example, in Germany, My show in up a BAFTA and an Oscar-nod for differences between Europe and real thing you can do, but if you other “My show in Hyderabad a sucustoms were perpetrator, I did something friends, right from childhood.” work has been done in the last worstwas Hyderabad was a Best Documentary, the non-fiction Asia. The reaction in Indonesia has 50 years paid enough it becomes an ex- unique… per-duper hit.they Even are Sania Mirza’s performshowed the footage The Ilast ninehim months have to reconcile with what super-duper hit. film has stunned audiences and dis- been the single most powerful and did as a nation. andeasily. you can lie to yourself. In of played familyI’ve couldn’t tickets ed onOverall, himselfout on like the roof which I had an action-packed been im-get cuse Even Sania Mirza’s turbed the Indonesian government. important reaction in the world. pressed with audiences keeping that And inwho Bangalore, onlie, it only leads to a notmovie done with the others. And for any theof32-year-old.

He are al- I performed family couldn’t get In what is touted as a radical ap- The film has utterly changed the lowing themselvesthe downward spiral of corruption and that same day as the festivsent us down a rabbit hole for struck gold with his weekend to identify with a Sunburn tickets easily proach to documentary-making, way the country is talking about its man like Anwar. al. Still, there was suchmoral vacuum. a crowd that After you’ve justified fivecomedy years ofshow my lifethat and debuted his life and in the film traces the story of the Indo- past. The key variable is to know to killing, you now have to blame ledJune they moved the showthe from a stadito 1,200 hours of footage. on Colors, then watched his nesian genocide through the eyes of what extent audiences are investe- After the film, the um the victim to say it’s their fault and to an open-air and even Ientire showed the hoping sethim burn tofootage the ground afIndonesian media venue Anwar Congo, a perpetrator who d…in official histories that deny sent its reporters to printed Butworst I did part, not you’ve to kill again, he ter would recognise himself, recoga short-circuit, and fell out collectmore and tickets.the has killed hundreds of ‘communi- their country’s role in perpetrating document stories of because if you getthese any extra money for that,” he says.don’t, it’s an admisnise meaning of whataka he’sGutthi, done. with one of histhe actors Sunil Grover, sts’ wanted by the then government. atrocities. So, some countries that atrocities, strong editorials have sion that it was wrong the firstwho time. very in disturbed but he wentHe onwas to star Mad in India ondares Star What follows in the nearly three- have been involved with genocide been written… how The horrible thing here The not say itthe is awful. he Plus. Despite the turbulence, viewerSorathasboss the hour film is a horrifying surreal re- and absolutely deny it… the public government takenIt’s is the of day. ings of his show have proposed close to 9pm. Sharma hascontinuation just started his changes to remained largely unafall this? enactment of the killings that left knows that the official history is a In a way, the government people He sprints into his evil. officeOrdinary in his grey hooded fected. The initial popularity his clothes, of he the talked show in Indonemore than a million people dead; an lie. In other countries, ordinary peo- sia has been disappointing. know than re- cov- made it a twice weekly, sweatshirt,On track andbetter a black capto that about improving his but with films in the onepants episode of history suppressed sys- ple are invested in telling stories de- hand, the government that are ers most ofhasn’t his face.member His officeevents is a duplex apart- One acting.

He made the offing and given Sharma’s busy schedule it of the chilling tematically by the Indonesian gov- nying their involvement with banned the film, because to has talkbeenfindings ment of inthe suburban Mumbai that scene better, more cinemight soon befilm a weekly. cul- dangerous of the ernment. In a phone interview, atrocities and for those countries, tural, political and converted about. The conditions into a workspace.

In the living room,is theThe matic, more fun.

He concept of Comedy Nights, which is promedia support consequences American filmmaker Joshua Oppen- the film has been challenging. in which forgetting a the duced teamhave of young animatedly discuss kept proposing embelby Sharma’s company K9 Productions, for the movie, I think.a They also writers of denial heimer speaks on the film’s impact, possifor the nextgenocide episodebecome of Comedy Nights is partly borrowed from It all boils down to people, for au- not brought in the script lishments in show whichTheI the British army generals the nature of impunity and why “we diences to approach Anwar Congo who would have threatened a condition of with Kapil, watched non-fican even powKumars at Number 42. Asaw celebrity is more invited for tocurrently kill bletheismost are much closer to the perpetrators through my intimacy with him and people. moral and cultural vac- of an interview and Sharma’s tion show on television.

In the third week erful metaphor for imoddball Punjabi than we would like to think”. Ex- to empathise with him, to think that punity… all the way to But, there’s been no movement uum, which you can see cerpts from the interview: we are all much closer to the perpe- against Pancasila Youth (one of the in the film. But the world in which the final scene. main organisations involved in the we forget any genocide is an apocIf this film hadn’t happened for killings), no movement against the alyptic one.

Anwar, how would he have dealt corruption, nothing against gangsters… the leading candidate for the You interviewed many perpetrators, with his guilt? As you say, his conscience is rattled, he is presidential elections this year is ac- Anwar was the 41st. How did he disturbed… cused of the mass murder of stu- become your central character?

In my investigations, I tried to go Anwar would’ve still been tormentdents in 1998. deeper and it wasn’t that I was look- ed by nightmares. It’s very frightening for the right character… but I ing for Anwar… but above all, it You lived in Indonesia for nearly a lingered on Anwar because I felt doesn’t matter if it’s good for Anwar decade, and filmed The Act of Killing over five years. How is it that his pain was close to the sur- or not. The film is not a therapy for possible for a people, a country to face. By this time I recognised that Anwar or other perpetrators. In this forget genocide? the boasting (by perpetrators) was year’s presidential election, I think One of the chilling findings of the not a sign of pride but a desperate Anwar will be campaigning for film is the consequences of denial. need for them to feel that what they some of the worst candidates and is Anwar Congo and his friends, the did was right, and that opened up a already offering his celebrity supperpetrators of the 1965 genocide, whole new understanding. I sensed port to them. in general, have written a victor’s that in Anwar, because the first day I Bloodied hands Adi Zulkadry (left) and Anwar Congo, two of the perpetrators, on the sets of The Act of Killing AFP history to justify what they’ve done. met him he danced on the roof (af- PRIYANKA KOTAMRAJU

He might have missed out on an Oscar but Joshua Oppenheimer’s The Act of Killing reminds us that a world which forgets a genocide is an apocalyptic one

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Savant of the light Souk at noon, Marrakesh, 1966 (left); Jesus Saves, Pune,1986 thomas luttge

ing. “Everybody is becoming famous and earning a lot of money. But I have people’s blessings. That’s what makes the difference,” says Sharma. His buddies reveal that his village bumpkin act is just a ruse to elicit more laughter — he is an avid reader, especially of books by Khushwant Singh, and keeps abreast of current affairs. “I’ll never play an astronaut.

I always show a rickshawallah who is tired or a housewife cribbing about the chai patti getting over. I talk about the problems that 70 per cent of the country can relate to. But at the same time, I should also reach out to those who roam around in BMWs,” he says.

Lever remembers Sharma visiting his house some years ago to discuss a show he was planning to launch. Frustrated with jumping from one reality show to another, he wanted to start his own company. “I was tired of being graded on every episode. It is odd to get 10 points for a performance. How does one judge if the audience laughed more or less. I just wanted to get out of that rut,” says Sharma. The initial plan was to stick to pure stand-up acts. Later, he included skits and gags so that he could showcase his acting and singing talent as well. “The format is fresh. Kapil definitely has an edge over others because he can sing, act and has very good comic timing. He is extremely talented but one can’t deny he’s very lucky as well,” says Lever.

Members of his crew say that Sharma microevery aspect of the DeWe decide that I can tag along on one of his manages ry of a place rather than theshow placehimself. itself. They having a team of between writers, hedecay monitors photographic explorations to Mir Momin ka spite are in border zones and the script, constantly making improvisations Daira (a cemetery located in the old city). growth, a kind of transitional space that rebetween Actress Sumona flects the shots. semantic No Man’s LandChakravarti, that Luttge When the sun plays hiscontrarian wife on theapproach show, says the team Graveyard shiftcomes out in Punjab, we spend who favours.

This sometimes hours staringthousands at it. It’s not like Mumbai doesn’t rehearse as they didI pick earlier, Aroundjust us crowd upon thousands catches the viewerasonmuch the wrong foot. up where the sunlight doesn’t aparthis faultless timing helpshis gloss over of gravestones, islands in an reach ocean your of death.

At but a catalogue andcomic we leaf through work.

A ment and people end up taking vitamin tomb, pills,” any “There areon times I’ve gone fully the heart lies Mir Momin Istrabadi’s nudegoof-ups. pregnant woman a beach.

A souk in says whose father was a police officer on divided stage. Itbyhappens last-minute whoSharma, was a Persian and the original architect of blank Morocco brilliantwith shadows.

A mistand mother aLuttge housewife.

His observations, es- scripts andriver 10-page long dialogues.

Butasking he efHyderabad. has been cataloguing the shrouded in Bangladesh.

“I am pecially those made while worked at a local inthe theviewer. gaps,”And, saysofChakavarti fate of Mir Momin’s city he from his first visit fortlessly somethingfills from course, for PCO extrathat cash, handythe at who Sharma years on the here to in earn 1975, some believing in came Hyderabad somemet viewers, thistwo is also tooago much.

Theyreality don’t Kahaani Comedy Circus Ki served. where The she college he hadLike to play five char- show “tensionfestivals of timewhere stays open”. all photograwant to be asked.

They want to be with serve him. The only challenge she acters in aissingle act without changing phers he a scholar of the sun, a savanthis ofcosthe partnered image should their feelings.

Should Hasande glow Ravo can predict maintainingShould the show’s appeal. tume. on the show light. Later, He approves of Hasde the morning serve their is expectations. serve their on MH1,us. a At Punjabi channel, he could a problem us. around this hour the necropolis is quiet. dreams. And“It then they be are happy.

I don’tfor serve. used same characters he had Somethe graves have fresh flower petals on them, I just offer.” Most shows take a while to do invented these competitions. well,up buthis wefirst werecamera a hit right from the spoorfor of mourners.

Luttge picked at age 12, The only other studenton the flower shooting images the start. rarely happens.

A goat skips alongstar munching of hisThat garden in the family from alma Hindu ColNow has toMunich. try andFifty maintain petals,his now onmater, this grave, now on houseone outside years I talk about the lege Amritsar, heguest says isatprime that,in like a finicky a buf- problems that 70 per that,” on heshe is adds. still at it. The journey minister Manmohan Singh.

“Par Sharma fet. Luttge, carrying both a digital hasn’t beencouldn’t easy. “I agree sit at more. home cent of the country college pataa himedium-format nahi tha main Even if there’s a minor slip, his camera koand and write hundreds of emails,” he can relateout to of Life comes bhi waha sewith hoon. black-and-white Sirf PM sahib ka viewers don’tfor waste a minute in camera says, looking funders, looking contradictions, life didn’t down realpata tha (the college expressing their disappointment film, immediately crouches for exhibition space.

Ninety-eight doesn’t come out of ise was also there, only on Twitter andlead Facebook page. to that try Iand frame thethey creature perhis cent of them to nothing. harmony knew about thecanopy PM),” he says.

At times in hehis finds the attention amidst a stone that covers Working darkroom, he can too much to at take.

“Nobody asksto Sachin hit a a grave. The goat suddenly grows most make one threetoprints All are invited six for them.a But asked jokes all self-conscious and leaps, even as day.I’m “These aretoallcrack originals,” he His small-town roots, clumsy muchare on my ache shoots.

A quick glance at theEnglish and the time. I have says.so“They all mind. made I’m in my early financial underline most his tually quite a serious he with says, failing in screen.

A shaketroubles of the head.

“Too late,” heofsays. own darkroom.

I didguy,” them all these gags. he aspires for a more inclusive audiattemptthe to same control smile friends I pointBut to more ruminants headed this way.

He his chemicals, waya as I did,as50his years ago. ence. the turnout at his showescapes is anything up. you Then, grim expression is notIfinterested.

Once a quarry him,to it crack And here getwith thisaquality which you and can go by, hehim has forever. already achieved that. Urban col- wide adds, “I get more irritated when escapes nevereyes, get he elsewhere.”

Now even the photolege students, an 80-plus couple who wantThe to people anything athis all.work Instead, Later we return to the Goethe-Zentrum. graphicdon’t papersay that he prints on isthey gobless him, aisfarmer from Bihar wants to really close just stare at is mynever face.”any exhibition a distillation of halfwho a century of come ing extinct.

“This and is my life, there shake legphotographs with the celebrity and — a canWith thehethree-film hecompiling recently work. aThe span guest the globe Mo- guarantee,” says. Now hedeal is busy cer survivor forSome her recovYashraj Films, Sharma is set to rocco, China,crediting Germany,Sharma New York. of the clinched his latest with images of Hyderabad to be exhibited ery, are some ofare thepervaded attendeesbyona his show. offlater another dream from his checklist. compositions sense of dry strike in Berlin this year.

Bank-Chor month, OutsideHumans his studio Mumbai’s Film City, will startwhenever shooting you humour. areatplaced ironically.

An HeTo Luttge, pick upnext the camera, heasplays the it lead.

Lever suggests he enthusiastic teenage girls trywe tosee sneak past se- where empty Cola bottle is all that of humanas much you turn outwards, you are also on tointo every of recesses this hardcurity takeofclose-ups of Sharma on their should ity in ato photo a dense façade of Manhattan. turninghold it inward theminute shadowy of “I feel soofproud of him.are He’s smartphones.

An elderlyof lady usingand herobjects grand- earned Unusual juxtapositions people the self.success.

The landscapes the interior as so much respect for be comics. son’s shoulder as a crutch, every are a recurring motif in hissays work.

“Lifeminute comes brought mysterious as those that can foundThanks in the himworld. the status of the entire community has of four-hour shoot she attended was outthe of contradictions, life doesn’t come out of to outer worth the pain in her knees. Guests willingly gone up,” he says. harmony,” says Luttge. stay holed upthe in the studio — overnight as the jaideep unudurti is a writer and the founder of the I examine cityscapes under louring chaudhuri shoot spillsseem intolike theawee hours ofof the morn- mohini Hyderabad Graphic Novel project skies, they photograph a memo-

I don’t serve, I offer

Following German photographer Thomas Luttge as he tramps through graveyards, in Hyderabad, looking for that munching goat and other unusual juxtapositions

“Y

No man’s land German photographer Thomas Luttge has been chronicling Hyderabad since 1975 sanjay borra

All aboard A bevy of stars have appeared on Comedy Nights with Kapil Sharma; (clockwise from bottom) with Ranbir Kapoor; Salman Khan; Ranveer Singh and Deepika Padukone; and Hrithik Roshan

ou cannot turn the cow,” says Thomas Luttge firmly. I am at an exhibition of his photographs at the Goethe Zentrum in Hyderabad. Even talented Western photographers have met their Waterloo in India. I’d asked him about his images, quite different from the usual cliché-ridden scenes. “Europeans come and look for the cows. Where are they cows?

Oh here is a cow. And then they —”. Luttge shakes his head. “And there are photographers who do all kinds of tricks so the cow might turn and you can get the beautiful lines and the shape of the cow. I would never do that. I would say if the cow is like this, I have to accept it.”

Luttge, who bears an uncanny resemblance to Jeremy Bentham, moves with a spryness belying his seven decades. He has been coming to India since the 1960s. How does he avoid getting swamped by curious onlookers, I ask.

“As a photographer, you are like an actor on the stage. So you have to develop something, you guide people and make them do what you want. I have trained myself in this way.” family smooches, mocks and flirts with the star till they go red with embarrassment. And yet, star after star clamours to be on his show — some have even invited themselves. It’s not often that you see Deepika Padukone beg for tissues to stanch joyful tears or Salman Khan slide off a sofa from laughter. Veteran comic Johny Lever believes Sharma’s biggest strength lies in his ability to read his guests well. “Sunny Deol is an extremely shy man. He hates giving interviews. But when he came on Kapil’s show, he completely let his hair down and opened up. You have to give Kapil credit for that,” says Lever.

People watching So what makes Sharma so funny? “You see, there’s a market near Ville Parle station, from where I buy…” he begins. He lifts his cap and giggles like a child as I call him out on a joke he’s often repeated on the show. “No really, in Amritsar I had a lot of time to observe people.

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Blank spaces Faizan Ashraf Tantray, 18, is a commerce student in Class X. In February 2011, he was sitting around, chatting with two friends in Baramulla’s old town when he was injured. He suffered 70 per cent loss of vision in his left eye

X-ray vision Numerous pellets embedded in the skull of the now blind Aamir Kabir Begh

That empty gaze Pellet guns riddle the idea of ‘non-lethal’ crowd control in Kashmir’s Baramulla district

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pellet cartridge holds around 500 little iron balls in it. When shot, they scatter in the air, hitting anyone within range. According to the J&K Police in India, the pellet gun is a non-lethal weapon that is useful in controlling crowds, causing minimal damage. But the young protestors in this violence-ravaged State have a different story to tell. They have been losing their eyesight due to indiscriminate use of crowd control weapons, like the pellet gun, by an untrained security establishment, apart from crude weapons like catapults and tear gas fired from a close range.

Shot in Baramulla in August last year, these images are of young men who were injured by pellets and in many cases, lost complete or partial vision. On February 16 this year, members of the Peoples Democratic Party staged a demonstration in the State Assembly about the blindings.

vivek singh is a Gurgaon-based photojournalist who is currently working on long-term projects in India’s north-eastern periphery. He received a grant from The Manuel Rivera-Ortiz Foundation for Documentary Photography in 2013 for his work on ethnic conflict in Assam.

The forsaken Tariq Ahmed Gojri, now 18, was only 15 years old, when he was shot at with a tear gas shell from close range, outside his home in Baramulla, where he lay bleeding for the next five hours. Security forces did not let his family evacuate him. His mother was fired at when she tried to pull him in. Excessive bleeding resulted in the total loss of vision in Tariq’s right eye

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Lost cause Aamir Ashraf Hajam, 22, the son of a barber, also from Baramulla, was returning from Economics tuition in 2010, when he was shot at. Five surgeries later, his right eye remains sightless Dark days Aamir Kabir Begh, 21, was shot from close quarters on the evening of September 18, 2010, while returning from the district hospital in Baramulla’s old town.

He lost vision in both eyes

Caught in the middle Aqib Bashir Bhat, 15, a Class IX student, lost vision in his left eye when he was hit in February 2013 while ferrying tea and food to his father and workers at their apple orchard in Palhallan in the Baramulla district

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India’s funniest man Natural

Final cut Director Joshua Oppenheimer hopes that The Act of Killing will expose society’s villainy afp / brendan smialowski

From farmers in Bihar to college students in Mumbai, everybody loves him. We unlock Kapil Sharma’s success as he now readies for a role in films

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ot too long ago, before he one, while the other was reserved for the enter- February, Comedy Nights (with 8.4 TVM) was had tasted stardom, Kapil tainers. In his trademark style, which the nation the fourth most watched show on Indian teleSharma performed at intim- has now come to adore, Sharma belted out his vision, ahead of India has Got Talent 5. A young ate social gatherings and “Punjabi-flavoured jokes”. Sadly, they fell flat. The assistant peers into her laptop, announcing parties to earn a living. On one oc- largely NRI audience was not tickled by his hu- embarrassing facts about the actors coming casion, he was invited by a Tami- mour. “Not a single person was listening to me. I on the next day’s show, while someone jots lian businessman to regale his was sweating with nervousness. I was sure my em- these down on a large white board. The meetguests at a ceremony where his ployers would refuse to pay me for doing such a ing is interrupted by Sharma’s arrival. They teen daughter was made to bad job. But then Sunidhi Chauhan went on to queue up to hug him in turns, even though it wear her first-ever half-sari. At perform after me and she got an even worse re- has been only a couple of hours since they last the time, Sharma had just sponse. There was also a magician from Moscow. met. “I just got up from sleep. I usually shoot emerged victorious in The Somehow people liked him. I think he managed through the night and sleep during the day,” he Act of Killing, Joshua Op- Tell us about the film’s reception.

And it’shedone so, in part, because Great Indian trators Laughter impress the The girl’s chacha,” says wistfully. showed howwith he killed viche says, aster hehe enters a room ‘Boss’ his carved thanChalwe’d to like to think. penheimer’s documen- Many countries, for instance they beings and in being He is relieved to have putare suchhuman incidents behind lenge (2009), one of nine realtim on using wires), it was an bold letters its door. perpetrators are human, including tary on the 1965-66 mass Germany and the US, have human right Inside, and three likingthey you,know they what’s listen to ity television their shows he has him. “Once people start extraordinary example of impunity, visitors are comfortably sprawmorality. killings in Indonesia, took suppressed parts of their wrong. To avoid living most exactly won.

The hall rentedEven for the func- everything you in say,” what’s says Sharma. own whatathe survivors had told led across leather couch.

“Please nationality plays a part the film festival circuit by storm af- history. Did you sense that of their lives in anguish, like Adi Zul- memeet tioninwas elevated After thisare rather hurtful experience, thefitted with earlier. this boasting, you find myIn college friends from Amthe two practice of evil.

These some ter its release in 2013. Screened at way audiences reacted? platforms facing kadry (Anwar other.truths he isthat chuffed a ro- Congo’s friend) who a metaphor regime of impuniritsar,” he for tellsa me, adding, “I have of theeach painful the about film garnering more than 100 film festivals, picking It’s very specific. You can’t see broad The in the film that killing is the ty. always bust fan following insays south India. religious So, instead moving to anhadofthe sameonset of uncovers.

For example, in Germany, My show in up a BAFTA and an Oscar-nod for differences between Europe and real thing you can do, but if you other “My show in Hyderabad was a sucustoms were perpetrator, I did something friends, right from childhood.” work has been done in the last worst Hyderabad was a Best Documentary, the non-fiction Asia. The reaction in Indonesia has 50 years paid enough it becomes an ex- unique… per-duper hit.they Even are Sania Mirza’s performshowed the footage The Ilast ninehim months have to reconcile with what super-duper hit. film has stunned audiences and dis- been the single most powerful and did as a nation. andeasily. you can lie to yourself. In of played familyI’ve couldn’t tickets ed onOverall, himselfout on like the an roofaction-packed which I had been im-get cuse Even Sania Mirza’s turbed the Indonesian government. important reaction in the world. pressed with audiences keeping that And inwho Bangalore, onlie, it only leads to a notmovie done with the others. And for any theof32-year-old.

He are al- I performed family couldn’t get In what is touted as a radical ap- The film has utterly changed the lowing themselvesthe downward spiral of corruption and that same day as the festivsent us down a rabbit hole for struck gold with his weekend to identify with a Sunburn tickets easily proach to documentary-making, way the country is talking about its man like Anwar. al. Still, there was suchmoral vacuum. a crowd that After you’ve justified fivecomedy years ofshow my lifethat anddebuted his life and in the film traces the story of the Indo- past. The key variable is to know to killing, you now have to blame ledJune they moved the showthe from a stadito 1,200 hours of footage. on Colors, then watched his nesian genocide through the eyes of what extent audiences are investe- After the film, the um the victim to say it’s their fault and to an open-air and even Ientire showed the hoping sethim burn tofootage the ground afIndonesian media venue Anwar Congo, a perpetrator who d…in official histories that deny sent its reporters to printed Butworst I did part, not you’ve to kill again, he ter would recognise himself, recoga short-circuit, and fell out collectmore and tickets.the has killed hundreds of ‘communi- their country’s role in perpetrating document stories get because if you any extra money for that,” he says.don’t, it’s an admisnise meaning of whataka he’sGutthi, done. with one of histhe actors Sunil Grover, of these sts’ wanted by the then government. atrocities. So, some countries that atrocities, strong editorials have sion that it was wrong the firstwho time. very in disturbed but he wentHe onwas to star Mad in India ondares Star What follows in the nearly three- have been involved with genocide been written… how The horrible thing here The not say itthe is awful. he Plus. Despite the turbulence, viewerSorathasboss the hour film is a horrifying surreal re- and absolutely deny it… the public government takenIt’s is the of day. ings of his show have proposed close to 9pm. Sharma hascontinuation just started his changes to remained largely unafall this? enactment of the killings that left knows that the official history is a In a way, the government people He sprints into his evil. officeOrdinary in his grey hooded fected. The initial popularity his clothes, of he the talked show in Indonemore than a million people dead; an lie. In other countries, ordinary peo- sia has been disappointing. know than re-cov- made it a twice weekly, sweatshirt,On track andbetter a black capto that about improving his but with films in the onepants episode of history suppressed sys- ple are invested in telling stories de- hand, the government that are ers most ofhasn’t his face. member His officeevents is a duplex apart- One acting.

He made the offing and given Sharma’s busy schedule it of the chilling tematically by the Indonesian gov- nying their involvement with banned the film, because to has talkbeenfindings ment of inthe suburban Mumbai that scene better, more cinemight soon befilm a weekly. cul- dangerous of the ernment. In a phone interview, atrocities and for those countries, tural, political andconverted about. The conditions into a workspace.

In the living room,is the matic, more fun.

He The concept of Comedy Nights, which is promedia support consequences American filmmaker Joshua Oppen- the film has been challenging. in which forgetting a the duced teamhave of young animatedly discuss kept proposing embelby Sharma’s company K9 Productions, for the movie, I think.a They also writers of denial heimer speaks on the film’s impact, possifor the nextgenocide episode become of Comedy Nights is partly borrowed from It all boils down to people, for au- not brought in the script lishments in show whichTheI the British army generals the nature of impunity and why “we diences to approach Anwar Congo who would have threatened a condition of with Kapil, watched non-fican even powKumars at Number 42. Asaw celebrity is more invited for tocurrently kill bletheismost are much closer to the perpetrators through my intimacy with him and people. moral and cultural vac- of an interview and Sharma’s tion show on television.

In the third week erful metaphor for imoddball Punjabi than we would like to think”. Ex- to empathise with him, to think that punity… all the way to But, there’s been no movement uum, which you can see cerpts from the interview: we are all much closer to the perpe- against Pancasila Youth (one of the in the film. But the world in which the final scene. main organisations involved in the we forget any genocide is an apocIf this film hadn’t happened for killings), no movement against the alyptic one.

Anwar, how would he have dealt corruption, nothing against gangsters… the leading candidate for the You interviewed many perpetrators, with his guilt? As you say, his conscience is rattled, he is presidential elections this year is ac- Anwar was the 41st. How did he disturbed… cused of the mass murder of stu- become your central character?

In my investigations, I tried to go Anwar would’ve still been tormentdents in 1998. deeper and it wasn’t that I was look- ed by nightmares. It’s very frightening for the right character… but I ing for Anwar… but above all, it You lived in Indonesia for nearly a lingered on Anwar because I felt doesn’t matter if it’s good for Anwar decade, and filmed The Act of Killing over five years. How is it that his pain was close to the sur- or not. The film is not a therapy for possible for a people, a country to face. By this time I recognised that Anwar or other perpetrators. In this forget genocide? the boasting (by perpetrators) was year’s presidential election, I think One of the chilling findings of the not a sign of pride but a desperate Anwar will be campaigning for film is the consequences of denial. need for them to feel that what they some of the worst candidates and is Anwar Congo and his friends, the did was right, and that opened up a already offering his celebrity supperpetrators of the 1965 genocide, whole new understanding. I sensed port to them. in general, have written a victor’s that in Anwar, because the first day I Bloodied hands Adi Zulkadry (left) and Anwar Congo, two of the perpetrators, on the sets of The Act of Killing AFP history to justify what they’ve done. met him he danced on the roof (af- PRIYANKA KOTAMRAJU

He might have missed out on an Oscar but Joshua Oppenheimer’s The Act of Killing reminds us that a world which forgets a genocide is an apocalyptic one

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Savant of the light Souk at noon, Marrakesh, 1966 (left); Jesus Saves, Pune,1986 thomas luttge

ing. “Everybody is becoming famous and earning a lot of money. But I have people’s blessings. That’s what makes the difference,” says Sharma. His buddies reveal that his village bumpkin act is just a ruse to elicit more laughter — he is an avid reader, especially of books by Khushwant Singh, and keeps abreast of current affairs. “I’ll never play an astronaut.

I always show a rickshawallah who is tired or a housewife cribbing about the chai patti getting over. I talk about the problems that 70 per cent of the country can relate to. But at the same time, I should also reach out to those who roam around in BMWs,” he says.

Lever remembers Sharma visiting his house some years ago to discuss a show he was planning to launch. Frustrated with jumping from one reality show to another, he wanted to start his own company. “I was tired of being graded on every episode. It is odd to get 10 points for a performance. How does one judge if the audience laughed more or less. I just wanted to get out of that rut,” says Sharma. The initial plan was to stick to pure stand-up acts. Later, he included skits and gags so that he could showcase his acting and singing talent as well. “The format is fresh. Kapil definitely has an edge over others because he can sing, act and has very good comic timing. He is extremely talented but one can’t deny he’s very lucky as well,” says Lever.

Members of his crew say that Sharma microevery aspect of the DeWe decide that I can tag along on one of his manages ry of a place rather than theshow placehimself. itself. They a team of between writers, hedecay monitors photographic explorations to Mir Momin ka spite are inhaving border zones and the script, constantly making improvisations Daira (a cemetery located in the old city). growth, a kind of transitional space that rebetween Actress Sumona flects the shots. semantic No Man’s LandChakravarti, that Luttge When the sun plays hiscontrarian wife on theapproach show, says the team Graveyard shiftcomes out in Punjab, we spend who favours.

This sometimes hours staringthousands at it. It’s not like Mumbai doesn’t rehearse as they didI pick earlier, Aroundjust us crowd upon thousands catches the viewerasonmuch the wrong foot. up where the sunlight doesn’t reach of your aparthis faultless timing helps gloss over of gravestones, islands in an ocean death.

At but a catalogue andcomic we leaf through his work.

A ment and people end up taking vitamin tomb, pills,” any areon times I’ve gone fully the heart lies Mir Momin Istrabadi’s nudegoof-ups. pregnant“There woman a beach.

A souk in says whose father was a police officer ondivided stage. Itbyhappens last-minute who Sharma, was a Persian and the original architect of blank Morocco brilliantwith shadows.

A mistand mother Luttge a housewife.

His observations, es- scripts andriver 10-page long dialogues.

Butasking he efHyderabad. has been cataloguing the shrouded in Bangladesh.

“I am pecially those made while worked at a local inthe theviewer. gaps,”And, saysof Chakavarti fate of Mir Momin’s city he from his first visit fortlessly somethingfills from course, for PCO extrathat cash, handythe at who Sharma years on They the reality here to in earn 1975, some believing in came Hyderabad somemet viewers, thistwo is also tooago much. don’t Kahaani Comedy Circus Ki served. where The she college he hadLike to play five char- show “tensionfestivals of timewhere stays open”. all photograwant to be asked.

They want to be with serve him. The challenge she acters in aissingle act without changing phers he a scholar of the sun, a savanthis ofcosthe partnered image should theironly feelings.

Should Hasande glow Ravo can maintainingShould the show’s appeal. tume. on the show light. Later, He approves of Hasde the morning servepredict their is expectations. serve their on MH1,us.a At Punjabi channel, he could be happy. a problem us. around this hour the necropolis is quiet. dreams. And“It then they are I don’tfor serve. used same characters he had Somethe graves have fresh flower petals on them, I just offer.” Most shows take a while to do invented these competitions. well,up buthis wefirst werecamera a hit right from the spoorfor of mourners.

Luttge picked at age 12, The only other studenton the flower shooting images the start. rarely happens.

A goat skips alongstar munching of hisThat garden in the family from alma Hindu ColNow has toMunich. try andFifty maintain petals,his now on mater, this grave, now on houseone outside years I talk about the lege Amritsar, heguest says isatprime that,in like a finicky a buf- problems that 70 per that,” on heshe is adds. still at it. The journey minister Manmohan Singh.

“Par Sharma fet. Luttge, carrying both a digital hasn’t beencouldn’t easy. “I agree sit at more. home cent of the country college pataa himedium-format nahi tha main Even if there’s a minor slip, his camera koand and write hundreds of emails,” he can relateout to of Life comes bhi waha se hoon. black-and-white Sirf PM sahib ka viewers don’tfor waste a minute in camera with says, looking funders, looking contradictions, life didn’t down realpata tha (the college expressing their disappointment film, immediately crouches for exhibition space.

Ninety-eight doesn’t come out of ise was also there, only on Twitter andlead Facebook page. to that try Iand frame thethey creature perhis cent of them to nothing. harmony knew thecanopy PM),” he says.

At times in hehis finds the attention amidstabout a stone that covers Working darkroom, he can too much to at take.

“Nobody asksto Sachin hit a a grave. The goat suddenly grows most make one threeto prints All are invited six for them.a But asked jokes he all self-conscious and leaps, even as day. I’m “These areto allcrack originals,” His small-town roots, clumsy muchare on my ache shoots.

A quick glance at theEnglish and the time. I have says.so“They all mind. made I’m in my early financial underline most his tually quite a serious he with says, failing in screen.

A shaketroubles of the head.

“Too late,” heofsays. own darkroom.

I didguy,” them all these gags. he aspires for a more inclusive audiattemptthe tosame control smile friends I pointBut to more ruminants headed this way.

He his chemicals, wayaas I did,as50his years ago. ence. the turnout at his showescapes is anything up. you Then, grim expression is not If interested.

Once a quarry him,to it crack And here getwith thisaquality which you and can go by, hehim has forever. already achieved that. Urban col- wide adds, “I get more irritated when escapes nevereyes, get he elsewhere.”

Now even the photolege students, an 80-plus couple who wantThe to people anything athis all.work Instead, Later we return to the Goethe-Zentrum. graphicdon’t papersay that he prints on isthey gobless him, aisfarmer from Bihar wants of to come really “This close and at is my face.”any exhibition a distillation of halfwho a century ing extinct. is myjust life,stare there never shake a legphotographs with the celebrity and — a canWith thehethree-film hecompiling recently work. The span guest the globe Mo- guarantee,” says. Now hedeal is busy cer survivor forSome her recovwith Yashraj Films, Sharma is set to rocco, China,crediting Germany, Sharma New York. of the clinched his latest images of Hyderabad to be exhibited ery, are some ofare thepervaded attendeesbyona his show. offlater another dream from his checklist. compositions sense of dry strike in Berlin this year.

Bank-Chor month, OutsideHumans his studio Mumbai’s Film City, startwhenever shooting you humour. areatplaced ironically.

An HeTowill Luttge, pick upnext the camera, heasplays the it lead.

Lever suggests he enthusiastic teenage girls trywe tosee sneak past se- where empty Cola bottle is all that of humanas much you turn outwards, you are also on tointo every of recesses this hardcurity takeofclose-ups of Sharma on their should ity in a to photo a dense façade of Manhattan. turninghold it inward theminute shadowy of “I feel soofproud of him.are He’s smartphones.

An elderlyof lady usingand herobjects grand- earned Unusual juxtapositions people the self.success.

The landscapes the interior as so as much respect for be comics. son’s shoulder as a crutch, every are a recurring motif in hissays work.

“Lifeminute comes brought mysterious those that can foundThanks in the himworld. the status of the entire community has of four-hour shoot she attended was outthe of contradictions, life doesn’t come out of to outer worth the pain in her knees. Guests willingly gone up,” he says. harmony,” says Luttge. stay holed upthe in cityscapes the studio — overnight as the jaideep unudurti is a writer and the founder of the I examine under louring chaudhuri shoot spillsseem intolike theawee hours ofofthe morn- mohini Hyderabad Graphic Novel project skies, they photograph a memo-

I don’t serve, I offer

Following German photographer Thomas Luttge as he tramps through graveyards, in Hyderabad, looking for that munching goat and other unusual juxtapositions

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No man’s land German photographer Thomas Luttge has been chronicling Hyderabad since 1975 sanjay borra

All aboard A bevy of stars have appeared on Comedy Nights with Kapil Sharma; (clockwise from bottom) with Ranbir Kapoor; Salman Khan; Ranveer Singh and Deepika Padukone; and Hrithik Roshan

ou cannot turn the cow,” says Thomas Luttge firmly. I am at an exhibition of his photographs at the Goethe Zentrum in Hyderabad. Even talented Western photographers have met their Waterloo in India. I’d asked him about his images, quite different from the usual cliché-ridden scenes. “Europeans come and look for the cows. Where are they cows?

Oh here is a cow. And then they —”. Luttge shakes his head. “And there are photographers who do all kinds of tricks so the cow might turn and you can get the beautiful lines and the shape of the cow. I would never do that. I would say if the cow is like this, I have to accept it.”

Luttge, who bears an uncanny resemblance to Jeremy Bentham, moves with a spryness belying his seven decades. He has been coming to India since the 1960s. How does he avoid getting swamped by curious onlookers, I ask.

“As a photographer, you are like an actor on the stage. So you have to develop something, you guide people and make them do what you want. I have trained myself in this way.” family smooches, mocks and flirts with the star till they go red with embarrassment. And yet, star after star clamours to be on his show — some have even invited themselves. It’s not often that you see Deepika Padukone beg for tissues to stanch joyful tears or Salman Khan slide off a sofa from laughter. Veteran comic Johny Lever believes Sharma’s biggest strength lies in his ability to read his guests well. “Sunny Deol is an extremely shy man. He hates giving interviews. But when he came on Kapil’s show, he completely let his hair down and opened up. You have to give Kapil credit for that,” says Lever.

People watching So what makes Sharma so funny? “You see, there’s a market near Ville Parle station, from where I buy…” he begins. He lifts his cap and giggles like a child as I call him out on a joke he’s often repeated on the show. “No really, in Amritsar I had a lot of time to observe people.

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PRESENT IMPERFECT

Equal rights and free cocktails

Oddballs are the best

When candyfloss commercialisation shoves away the robust origins of Women’s Day Author Sally Gardner learned to read at 14. Today she is one of the leading writers of children’s books. Here she reveals her love for ‘the’ and scorn for all things adult

For you the dreamers Overlooked at school Never won prizes You who will own tomorrow.

the book is devoid of these same illustrations, because “adults can’t cope” with them. Gardner explains, “Children have much more open minds. They have a more philosophical outlook on life and they are much more able to f you don’t do well at school, people run with an idea. Adults tend to make concluquickly assume that you are unremarkasions and that shortens their lives or their ble, perhaps a wierdo, and that your life imaginative lives. I love dealing with people will never amount to much. For a large whose imagination is very healthy and active.” majority of us, the experience of school meant Imagination, Gardner believes, saved her. sitting in the audience and clapping, while She says, “Imagination showed me a world others went up on stage to receive prizes. Authat I had invented in my head. The possibility thor Sally Gardner was one of those chairof doing much more than I ever thought I warmers. Today, she is the author of nine and Way of seeing could do. It also gave me all my stories.” StoBottoms up The Kim illustrator of several more children’s books, Standish is not good at spelling or reading but ries that sheltered Kardashianisation of her from bullies and reand has won the Costa Children’s Book award he can “hear words”, he can “squeeze the es- moved herDay from daily travails. m vedhan Women's (2012) and the Carnegie Medal (2013) for Mag- sence out of them”. You see, like his creator, Gardner learned to read at 14. She attended got Moon (Hot Keys Book), which tells of a less Sally Gardner, he is an “image thinker” or, in a school for children with behavioural probthan perfect schoolboy. Maggot Moon is dedi- boring adult language, dyslexic. For Gardner lems (long shut now) even though she had a 013 was the year of rage-inducing femiWhat irks me about this whole celebration When I told people off for annoying me by cated to those who the system sneered at, who dyslexia is a “way of seeing” rather than a learning disability. She remembers the day nism. And rightly so. After the Delhi is that when it began, Women’s Day was a revo- wishing me Happy Women’s Day, they looked went on and will go on to own tomorrow. learning disability. In a Skype interview, prior when the words on the page suddenly fell into gang rape, it seemed, everything had lution, not an excuse to shop. In 1910, at a con- at me with the kind of revulsion ‘proud HinThis young adult book takes the reader hos- to her Bookaroo 2013 appearance, she says, place and sentences grew into stories. “I was in changed, yet nothing at all was differ- ference in Copenhagen, 100 women delegates dus’ seem to have for Wendy Doniger’s books. tage and catapults him/her into a dystopian “We (people with dyslexia) think in many this funny little hut with a tin roof. It was rainent. So when Women’s Day rolled along on from 17 countries decided to observe Woman’s “Geez, relax, we are only celebrating the many layers, that is why I am quite good at ing very very hard. And there was one boy on March 8, the marketing attempts at its so Day (sic) as a strategy to promote equal rights uniqueness that is us, okay,” one said with no world building.” the floor screaming. The noise level was becalled celebration of women, made me so an- for women. Equal rights. Not free gym member- trace of irony at all.

When Gardner looks at alphabets on the yond anything I could cope with. I just wanted gry that I threatened to slap people who ship. For the next few decades, Women’s Day Now a whole year has gone by and here we page, she doesn’t see the building blocks of to be gone. To be out of this place. I remember wished me Happy Women’s Day. It seemed to was a day of protest, of organising marches are again. You may have popped out a dozen words, or bits and bobs of language. Instead picking up this book (it was Wuthering Heights) me an easy way to trivialise these real issues of and speeches, inspiring women to ask for the times as you were reading this page to check she conjures up personalities with quirks. She and looking at it, and starting to read it with equality (lack of), safety (lack of) and misogy- right to vote, equal pay and an end to the vio- your phone for messages of love, support, and finds ‘schizophrenia’ particularly beautiful. my finger on the words and suddenly realised ny (plenty of). And nothing annoyed me more lence targeted at them. that most irritating of words applicable to this And is completely partial to ‘the’, “as it has a that everything had gone quiet. I was on the than how quickly marketers had jumped on It seems to me in the last few years, we have day, celebration. Nothing much has changed. lovely box-like shape to it”. She doesn’t like moors, it was snowing, it was very frightening. the bandwagon and managed to make it all taken the short slippery road down from the Just this week, newspapers reported that the words which crawl across the page, never And I was no longer in the school.” commercial and no substance.

Day’s idealistic and aggressive origins to Nirbhaya Fund — set up after the Delhi gang stretching out an arm or a leg. ‘Because’ really If reading parachuted her out of the conThe communication frenzy around Wom- candyfloss commercialism. We are not just rape — is lying unutilised. Even the 24-hour gets her goat as does ‘Sarah’ — her birth name. fines of school, her imagination also scared en’s Day starts at least a fortnight prior. For trivialising the issues that brought forth this women’s helpline that was set up in the CapiShe could never spell it, as it sprawled across her bullies witless. One day, tired with the some reason, technology companies seem to revolution, but in a race to buy tal — where more than 1,500 optithe page like an unheeding slug. She could name-calling and backstabbing of the girls in be the earliest assaulters. Last year, Microsoft discounted designer wear, we mistic women call in and seek never figure where the ‘h’ went, “It just walked her boarding school she told them a story. Not sent me a mail on February 28, wishing me an don’t even see that more than 100 help every day — is in imminent all over the place. And it seemed any old story. But that of a hand “Appy” Women’s Day (quotes theirs). “Mother, years after the first Women’s Day danger of being shut down as to have boots on. And it didn’t ev- When it began, creeping up the stairs slowly, sister, girlfriend, wife, daughter — it’s almost was marked, notions such as staff salaries have not been paid er belong to me,” she laments. A quietly and then throttling the impossible to decode their ‘want’ DNA, isn’t it? equal pay and prevention of vio- Women’s Day was a since December. friend suggested the name ‘Sally’revolution, not an bunch of them. Their cries woke However, Windows gives you a shot at flooring lence against women are as abEvery day there are reports of and she adopted it at once as it excuse the matron and they never dared to shop Adults tend to make her. There’s a variety of apps you can choose sent now as they were then. In real multiple rapes and monstrous breathed with life. She says, “‘S’ is bully Gardner again. Now that conclusions and from in making her feel good about herself terms, when you take into acmolestations. After the case of the a snake and is a squiggle, the ‘ll’s she is a famous author the old that shortens their and her world” it said. Maybe it was me; maybe count education and social evolueditor who was arrested for what have two long limbs and the ‘y’ is girls invited her back to their lives or their he did it was the general sense of gloom prevalent tion, the state of women around to a young journalist in an to catch it in.” school as a chief guest. To which imaginative lives then, but giving anyone “a shot at flooring the world now is perhaps worse elevator ride that lasted 196 secWhen alphabets can have such Gardner retorted, “I have no deher” seemed so wrong that it set the mood for than it was in 1910. Yet, we don’t care. We onds went public, human resources heads of rich lives it is not surprising that sire to be part of your old girl netthe teeth-gritting week that was to follow. would rather grab our discounted liposuction companies say in private, that hiring women Gardner’s books and characters work.” When they wrote back The celebrations of “womanhood” came in coupons that help us get into our discounted employees is now often not worth the trouble. have even denser interior lives. saying, “we remember you fondwaves. Discounts on diamond jewellery and little black dresses and head out for a Women’s Forget equal pay, truth is, there aren’t even Maggot Moon is never muffled by a young- ly”, she replied “the past is a foreign land.” diamanté sandals. Free diet plans and mega Day special event at the local hip bar, where we equal jobs anymore. adult-reader mandate. If anything, it heaves While school might not have been a particusaver coupons on cord-blood storage. Invita- hope someone interesting — ideally richer and And yet again, the emails extolling the celewith carmine violence, meted out by teachers larly happy time for Gardner, she never altions to seminars on work-home balance and taller than us — will come over and strike up a bration of women have started pouring in. on students, by students on fellow students. lowed it to define her and hopes that children whether investment banking is an ideal pro- conversation by telling us that no matter This year though, I am more sanguine about Gardner never humiliates her readers by talk- reading her book will realise the same. She fession for women. The poor PR professional what, to him, every day is Women’s Day. There my anger about the day and everything it now ing down to them. The edition for young read- found peace, even inspiration, in theatre. Havwho made the mistake of calling me, in order is nothing more vacuous than this. Yet the Kim stands for. It is a determination borne of deers includes illustrations at the bottom of the ing worked as a set designer for 15 years, she to enquire if I’ve received the email offering Kardashianising of Women’s Day is perfectly feat, certainly. Even if we give it a 100 more page, which show the circle of life. Not believes the stage moulded her into the writer up her lone woman CEO client as an interview legit and seems to be perfectly approved by years, it seems to me, not much is likely to through pretty whimsies, but through a rat she is today. Theatre taught her timing, prospect (standard industry practice, no one even perfectly intelligent seeming women. change. What’s the point fuming then? May as sniffing its way to a bottle of poison, falling rhythm, speech, dialogue and the most imdistrusts email services as much as PR profesAngst-ridden and frustrated by this loss of a well enjoy the free cocktails. dead, a fly landing on its nose, a fly laying mag- portant trade of all — how to ambush your ausionals do) got such an earful from me, it is en- cause, by the time it was actually Women’s Day, gots in its mouth, the rat being consumed by dience and keep them coming back for more. tirely possible she switched careers.

I couldn’t even bear to be social and polite. t@veenavenugopal the maggots and a fly finally breaking free from the maggot cocoon. The adult version of nandini nair

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Image thinker Sally Gardner, author of the shocking and entertaining Maggot Moon

world of an orphaned boy who is looked after by his grandfather. Standish Treadwell is the boy with one blue and one green eye, who could never tie his laces and is always in a mess. When his best friend Hector vanishes, he and his grandfather rebel to defeat the leather-clad villains of the Motherland, even if it means risking limb and life. This book might turn savage in parts, it might appear outrageous, but through it all you want to shake hands with the protagonist and say, “I know you… I have known you all along.”

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VEENA VENUGOPAL is editor BLink and author of Would You Like Some Bread With That Book

In & out Why travel when all worlds exist on the page

UNDISCOVERED COUNTRY

The part-time dacoit Criminality in rural India can be funny at times, sad at others, and invariably complex

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hat does travel mean in the age of Google and the World Wide Web? What can exploration be, when one can soar above rivers or dash through ancient monuments, with a click of a button? In an attempt to answer these questions, to extend the meaning of travel beyond packing a suitcase and moving to someplace different, HarperCollins has come out with Travelling In, Travelling Out. With 25 writers packed into less than 250 pages, the book, like any mountain hike, proves to be packed with highs, lows, the expected, the unexpected, the meaningful and the meaningless. The connection between the stories is stretched thin, but if you are looking to dabble in tales rather than dive deep within, it will fit your need. A few sparkle with insights, while others heave with platitudes. The worst line can be awarded to the following, which can be found in ‘Beauty in India’; “If Charles de Gaulle, finding the French ‘an ungovernable nation’, had called them ‘les veaux’ (cows), India can certainly be called a mock socialist, feudo-democratic, dynasto-oligarchic anarchy that continues to function within some unfathomable manner of cyclic, cosmic order!” The exclamation mark at the end dispels Travelling in, none of the tediTravelling Out A Book of Unexpected um. Overlooking Journeys such stolid writEdited by ing, there is much Namita Gokhale HarperCollins to browse through Category: Travel in this eclectic col₹599 lection.

The opening chapter by Devdutt Pattanaik puts a Hindu spin on travel by telling of the gods who are always on tour, and the modes of transport of their choice.

And to the delight of all armchair travellers, the naked wise man in Pattanaik’s chapter, helpfully reminds us that “seated or moving, we are always travelling.”

Ipsita Roy Chakraverti, the Wiccan priestess, goes ghost hunting (and finds them) in ‘Bhangarh: Of Darkness and Light’. Her encounter with orbs of light in a Rajasthani fort doesn’t frighten, but might make you a little more suspicious of that thing that goes bump and boo at night. Travel at times must be to foreign lands, like in Ali Sethi’s perceptive story ‘The Foreigner’s Situation’, but at times, it is just about going further south in the same city as Aakar Patel tells us in ‘Moving to Bombay’. While Namita Gokhale describes how the tourist town of Nainital is her hometown, Mayank Austen Soofi finds Nainital in a bookshop in Delhi. This book, like that bookshelf, shows that ultimately all worlds exist on the page.

Omair Ahmad nandini nair is an author. His last book was on Bhutan

talk read

saturday, march 8, 8, 2014 saturday, march 2014

janice pariat

PAPERWALLAH

Male or female?

Gender is an irrelevant question when it comes to readers and authors

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t started, as revolutions are wont to able with ‘male’ and ‘female’, we’ve prowith a penis to speak — and write — ‘as a do now, with a hashtag. Early this gressed to a more nuanced man’ and people without one ‘as a womyear, London-based designer and understanding of gender as not indisan’? This year, I do plan on reading books writer Joanna Walsh tweeted cartes solubly connected to biological endowwritten by women, but not because de voeux for her friends with illustrament. Hasn’t Facebook introduced 56 they’re women. I will also read On books track tions and 250-odd names of women gender options for their profiles? (Twowritten by men, but not because they’re Rent from writers. #readwomen2014 has become a spirit, Agender, Gender Fluid, Bigender, men. tractors terrifically popular trend, turning up on Gender Nonconforming, Intersex, NonBeyond the drawing of lines, loaned and ofto neighbouring timelines everywhere and graduating to binary, among many others.) What delines between only two camps, the farms often oil mainstream media. In online magazine cides whether you are a man or a womcounting is equally stifling. A quick trip the wheels of Berfrois, Walsh explained that “although an? If a person thinking of herself as a to my bookshelf informed me that life in60 a farm women read more than men, and ‘woman’ would write a per cent of my books are by male aubooks by female authors are book while (still) havthors — but what does that entail? Does published in roughly the it mean I am ‘sexist’? What if I same numbers, they are happened to truly love all more easily overlooked.” the other 40 per cent by andey was a part-time dacoit, or so I set in front of him. Had he indulged in racke- er, as a former school principal, made it a habit The hashtag, she goes on females? And only 27 heard. It might have just been ru- teering, murder, kidnapping and other assort- of asking children which class they studied in, to say, has been used as a per cent of the 60 per mour, but Pandey never denied it. ed mafia-related activities, he might have and rewarded them with small change for personal incentive, a rallycent? And even if we Other than the moustache he liked to become rich and powerful. Maybe even power- candy when they were able to tell her what ing cry, a celebration of rehad perfect equality, twirl, and the grin, he really did not look the ful enough to run for local elections and be- they were learning. It wasn’t very much, just cent achievements (of 50:50, knowing the part. He was a small man, five-foot nothing, come a Minister of State as other more enough to get them candy at the corner store, Alice Munro, who won sex of the author — in a and innocent of any air of aggression. On the ambitious criminals from the city have done; but the children loved their small rewards. For the Nobel Prize in multi-gendered other hand, I must confess that he never but Pandey was not a city man, nor did he op- the two miles from the main road to the farm Literature 2013, Eleaworld — wouldn’t mugged me or anybody that I know, so maybe erate on that scale. we would be followed by cries of, “Salaam, Behnor Catton, who won be much more when he was off the farm, hidden in the bushHe lived in a little thatched hut not far away ni! Salaam Babu!” the 2013 Man Booker informative es waiting to ambush a victim, he changed from the railway tracks that ran behind the So Pandey had two miles of warning that Prize and Lydia Davis than knowing completely. My only knowledge of him was farm. He had (illegally, of course,) expropriat- day when he found himself working on a farm winner of 2013 Man which authors are through the story of his larcenous work at our ed a small patch of land on which he was grow- that he wasn’t supposed to be. In his panic he Booker International brunette and which farm in UP. ing some crops. tried to drive straight back to the farm from Prize) and of authors who aren’t.

One way to earn money from a tractor in ruThough he stole some from my family, we the field he was working at. Instead of taking should be better known. AlWhat#readwomral India is to rent out its use to those who found it difficult to summon great bitterness the road he tried to go over the railway tracks so it has become a tag to disen2014 throws up — don’t have one. They pay for the diesel and theshutterstock for his deeds. My mother often straight from the field. As things / paulart cuss ‘women’s writing’, and in binary terms that labour done. The driver pockets half the mon- said, “Either they are intelligent would have it, the gradient was to linkup ‘read women’ prorisk derailing the deey and the rest is set aside for maintenance of and cheat you, or they are incomtoo high and the undercarriage jects around the world. ing a male body, or vice versa, how do we bate — is a bigger problem. A lack of dithe tractor and other such sundry expenses petent and will make a mess of evlodged in the tracks at such an anAfter this, lists have sprung up to add classify it? (And why, in the first place, versity and an unspoken bias in the way that are the bane of farming life. Pandey did erything. The best of them have gle that he could neither go over, My parents would to Walsh’s own. Flavorwire, Goodreads, this obsession to classify everything?) books are promoted, informing tastes the odd job for the neighbouring farms, but if long left the farmlands to make a nor reverse. find the tractor’s Time, Cosmopolitan, and countless perEven VIDA, the website Walsh faithfully which reinforce the demand for certain nobody was around he’d pocket the full pay- better life in the cities.”

In complete despair, he realised engine still warm sonal blogs. I resonate with the senticites as the place where ‘gender’ discrim‘types’ of books, in a vicious loop. Books ment and neglect to inform anybody about it.

But it did cause a problem. It is that the only way that he could from work, and ment and purpose behind ination in the literary arts is and writers are ignored because they The tractor was perpetually short of fuel hard to pay higher-than-average present himself at the farmhouse fresh tyredon’t marks this, given the asymmetries documented, uses charts fit some scheme, don’t have the and in constant need of some small repair wages for long, especially when was by abandoning the tractor on that the gendered assumpwith two categories. No ‘right’ contacts, don’t write in a particuwork or the other. you know your people are cheatthe rail tracks to the delicate mintions of a patriarchal culture guesses which they are. lar language, have a different experience He would be caught once in a while, when you. My parents tried often to istrations of any train coming I plan ing on reading have nurtured historically.

This counting of the of ‘gender’, happen to come from a cermy parents would arrive at the farmhouse and along. He did the only thing that booksupskill writtenthe by workers at the farm, Leading to telling and harmcamps stirs hesitation more tain (non-white?) part of the world. Less find the tractor’s engine still warm from work, givebut them women, not more opportunity. For example he could do. He got down from the tractor and ful exclusions — journals than an urge to rally around than it having to do with the author’s biand newly made marks from the huge tyresbecause as they paidare for Pandey to get his Heavy Motor Ve- spread himself before the machine to be in the they that focus primarily on ‘big #readwomen2014. That is ological sex. obvious incriminating evidence. He would women hicle Licence and he used it to work for them, way of any oncoming train. “Mai Behni ka news’ stories by certain aubecause, when I am encourTherefore, my literary resolution for bow his head and grin uneasily at the ha- and he used it to steal from them, simply be- saamna nahin kar sakta!” he wailed, unwilling thors, literary studies in uniaged to talk ‘as a woman’, I this year (and as many after) is #ReadEvrangues that would be his due, but since they cause he could. to face my mother after abandoning the tracversities that are designed to lean instead towards focuserything. Or #ReadWhatYouWant. Or had no actual proof, and since nobody at the Once, though, Pandey got caught. My par- tor to potential destruction. uphold a ‘canon’. ing on how different the ex#diversereading2014. Or #ReadAnyfarm would speak against him, he was able to ents only lived at the farm at the time of high My parents found him at the railway tracks, Yet I find myself hesitant to participaperience of every person is, and of how thingNotOnAList. Reading should be continue his little escapades. activity, during harvest and sowing, otherwise got the tractor unstuck, and Pandey continte. This is because #readwomen2014 dimany definitions of womanhood, and like a dim sum meal, go with what touIt didn’t make him a rich man, neither this they travelled back and forth. With my moth- ued to work for us. This is the criminality in ruvides literature by biological sex as a manhood, and anything in between, ches the heart. nor his rumoured night-time activities. He er’s diabetes, it would have been impossible to ral India, funny at times, sad at others, always rough proxy for gender. and beyond, can exist. Shouldn’t we was a poor man in one of the less prosperous stay for too long, as the unreliable electricity far more complex than any theory of it that I While this may have seemed all-enstrive to make it possible for anyone to pariatdescribed is the author Boats on Land parts of a poor country, it would have taken meant that her insulin injections were hard to janice have heard inofurban India. compassing 50 years ago, when talking express themselves, however they see much more than petty larceny for him to be maintain. But whenever my parents came to t @janicepariat of ‘men’ and ‘women’ was interchangethemselves, rather than forcing people t@OmairTAhmad able to break through the barriers that life had the farm, they would be announced. My moth-

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9 17BL BL

work read

BL BL 186

saturday, march 8, 8, 2014 saturday, march 2014

Quiet waters Filomena (seated centre) seldom revealed the storms that raged within from

ELSEWHERE

filomena’s journeys

Coffee emergencies Banking on Bitcoins

sorrows at BLink compiles everything you wanted to know about this cryptocurrency, Sharing but werelives tooand tech-shy to ask Dunkin’ Donuts

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Familial lives

“H

ome say that it’s going to revolu- way as paper money. Bitcoins are also traditional stock dealers, the idea is to The company finally filed for bankruptPete,” I say, stepping out28, theand front door of my tionise the global monetary sys- available in a physical form in some buy low and sell high to reap maximum i, cy in Tokyo on February reported are you?”

My750,000 next-door neightem, while others argue that it’s cases. But its primary form continues to returns. Other uses — legal and illegal — building. that they“How had lost almost of its the oneBitcoins I think and of asabout “Sparrow Man”, is nothing but another clever cyb- be data; you can use it to buy things on- exist all over the internet. Bitcoinmagazi- bour, customers’ 100,000 up against theup cold.

The pale beak of er-ponzi scheme. Whatever it is, Bitcoins line, peer to peer, using wallet softwares ne.com lists many options in various bundled of its own.

It added to about seven his nose pokes from the blue hood of his jacket. price categories where the mined or outper have changed the way the world per- or an online service. cent offaded all existing Bitcoins and was so good,” he says.around I look again.

His largeIn brown eyes are bought Bitcoin can be spent“Not — anything ceives currency online and off it. worth $473 million. a followWhere does it come from? with tears. up statement, Mt Gox said, “The compafrom paying for online filled dating (okcuIn the news for the wrong reasons of doctor,”there he tells “Theypossibility can’t treat me are created as of a repid.com)employto buying a house. “Just been to seenythebelieves late — with the bankruptcy onedecade of the ofBitcoins is me. a high orn in theoffirst the 20th adventor of “mined” a new era professional no more.”

His medical insurance runstolen.” out on him. “I’m only sult of complex number crunching by and a theGregory Simon, Banker, largest Bitcoin exchanges, Mt Gox,Borges last de that the Bitcoinshas were century, Filomena Figueirement, private enterprise spread of the an American 61, you know?” that makes him just one year older network of computers.

This process cur-paved for the instance, quit decided to In 2012, week — the cryptocurrency made a quick With the increasing popularity of Bit-than do’s extraordinary life begins in the English language, which way for a his job and me.Bitcoins “I don’t to wanna die! many But without theand drugs …” He setshrugs.

25 Bitcoins everyand 10 minto Nicaragua. recovery, however. hasGoarently coins, phishing malware village of“Bitcoin Raia in south wherecreates she social upheaval created shift a generation of He used Maybe onespecifically year. He tells me he has Hepatitis A her predetermined limit of 21 pay for 0.3 acretoof land in Six themonths. new counshrugged offwith Mt Gox’s death and rattle” re- utes. — ups targeting Bitcoin usersC. lives her siblings grandmother displacedupper elites, hitherto accustomed “C’mon, I’ll buyare uscoming coffee,” up I say. shares the million is expected to beprivileges. reached inCuoto the invokes try. Houses at the Hamptons near New ported Forbes.com, even in as the reassuring exchange clasp asOur well.building A DellSecureAvo. Embedded of this boundless the examparking lot with Works a Dunkin’ Donuts café.that Halfthere an hour year 2140. that the total number of Chico YorkFigueiredo and the Alberta Province in Canada rate to the dollar continued be an eyereport estimates are atlater, world, and throughto a babble of Konkani, Por-After ple of her musician father — we’re Bitcoins. sitting inside the150 glass-walled eatery with its pink-andBitcoinsimwill stay unchanged. can also be bought now using poppingtuguese $550 (approx.) a Bitcoin. Latin, Filomena least kinds of malware designed speand occasional an effusive, gifted individual with a proud anorange He gets a regular, with milk and extra sugar, I get a Therewill are two waysand to get hands Even Richard the logo.

Virgin Already a common fixturenourishment in online cifically to steal Bitcoins. bibes the spiritual that cestry his your heartbreaking errors, when itBranson of with amilk, no sugar. He tries to pay for the treat but Bitcoins. The easyto way is to purchase Group has decided to giveregular customers trade, the Bitcoin’s success story shelter her later in life.

Hermay eldeston daughter comes confronting a new and bewildering What does the future hold? in when them by signing uparrangement. for online “Wallet” chance to buy a seat on thegives Virgin Galac-I show him I have a $25 gift card from my sister, not be over yet.

So as Cuoto long aswill you Maria Aurora godon’t on to recreate her social for coffee emergencies.

With many countries and corporations services——a Mywallet and are depiction tic using Bitcoins! throw away your digital currency in the Journeys milieu and trajectory in Filomena’s Despite itsCoinbase encyclopaedic of a byWe sit at an orange table. Sunlight in the while other now willing to acceptstreams Bitcoins, curamong the more popular the mo-uncovers the mystibin — like James Howells Wales, composition that of is as muchwho a family memoir gone epoch,sites the at narrative Why should you care? customers ebb and flow around Petestrong. talks about his life. He rency’s future us. looks The Indian ment. Once signed up and linkwhile cleaning up his table, away culture as a reflection of anthrew effervescent pin- you calhave force that brought together Filomena and Withover e-tailing the pregot infected whilesituation workingisatstill a local hospital.

“I used to be a unclear though.

The Reyour —existing bank parents. Poring a hard drive a digital wallet ionedcontaining against a mercurial society. ed it to one ofChico the author’s old becoming ferred male of nurse. getting sick. Finally IndiaKept issued an advisory accounts,ofyoufamily can buy or sellnewspaper articles and with 7,500Anchored Bitcoins (worth by herover Avo $7.5 andmilan assortment journals, con- way of shopping and serve Bank selling, regardless of wheth- againstthey my blood.

It wasand Hep C.” thechecked use of virtual currency lion) — you might still end cashing in Bitcoins as you please. uncles, aunts and up cousins, “Filsultations with distant relatives, er you’re a business analyst stated That’s nickname for plans the disease. that ithis doesn’t have any of The hard way is to “mine”Cuoto succeeds in reconstructon the “Bitcoin omena revolution”. seems to have carried all You can even buy or just someone looking regulating “SomeBitcoin people get completely cured usage.

Currently the passion and warmth of her Bitcoins. This is similar toing athe lives of her parents.

Six months. Maybe ticket to space on What is a Bitcoin? to pick up a pair of head- there are butover I’m not oneactive of ’em.”

He was briefly 2,000 Indian users early life in Raia into her rela- mining for gold. But hereWhilethe reviewing events of the a year. He tells me Virgin Galactic On November 1, 2008 a research paper you’re scouring the web forpast, she is besieged by the paraphones, it is good to keep of Bitcoins, in the but military. a wife.largest A son. Got with“Had the third tionships in later life,” observes he has Hepatitis C using Bitcoins was posted by one Satoshi Nakamoto on 64-digit numbers. By get-dox that defined Chico’s life. For with the trend, currency- number divorced.

Never seein my son.” He of internet users the world Cuoto while retracing her mothan obscure listserv titled ting your computer to solve shrugs. the “Now I’m here, in Newport.” number of Bitcoin user’s cryptographic path. someone with social graces wise and too. Besides, the ano- (150 million), ‘Bitcoin: AThe Peer-to-Peer Cash puzzles constantly, you acan nymity does odd-jobs. is expected to shootFor up. instance, he trail leadsElectronic her to a period strong sense of propriety, Chi- of the Bitcoin service — ers tooHe System’.that Traditionally, of Bit- compete with other minersco which isofwhat makes it scary for theargue hallway and stairs in our No cleans one can against another to genwitnessedthe anorigins enlightening “had little experience coins areinteraction traced backbetween to this paper. can work in your favour too.and getsapocalyptic building a monthly online retainerevent fromthat old takes Mrs Rose, the the Bitcoin outside net- many the Nakaearly erate the number that theworlds his —extended moto (an alias, the identityand of work is on the lookout family landlady. He paints windows. he tires easily. thethe Hep C. whole thingBut down.

At the same“It’s time, for. If and your his class” and reconverts, theoriginal landed gentry What are the risks?

Filomena’s Journeys it, you the person as yet unknown) proposed Can’t do so muchprecise no more.” engineering of the Bitcoin sysgenerates receive 25 throes of an incurtheismissionaries; and the subse- computer mained in the A portrait of aismarriage, Barely is not with- Trevor, the creation of digital is conbrother lives in theand flatanonymous adjacent to mine, tem,who its finiteness set- is This a tall orderable though, and most quent birth money of an that ethos en- Bitcoins. alienation ofsix hisyears life. old, Bitcoin His a family and a culture out its risks and is very much work-in- with venient and untraceable, liberated from miners also adivorced, children he never sees. “I did up,two gives it an whom edge over traditional often this in groups, sharing grained in cultural assimilation With characteristic courage Maria Aurorado Couto progress.

As the highlightthe oversight of governments and theCategory: some bad things currencies in the military,” says Pete.

“I was digital locked up. and other attempted spoils Memoir between themselves.

While and community bonding. While Filomena’s daughter recalls herMt Gox fiasco a Bitcoin user couldBut losethey a lot banks. One that could all theof usual let of me out.”

Sitting as inwell. the bright, coffee-scented café currencies might reduce theirchildhood individualdaysed, in traversing theavoid brickwork the thisAleph Dharwar, ₹495 due to events that it’s arehard not under problems thatGoan arisesocial whenorder, making on- yields, at least it ensures some to associateEven any heinous crimes experiment with this fragile, if the Bitcoin fails,birdsort ofup re-withmoney early Cuoto growing six traumatised his control as well. Mt Gox, line payments. like created man. Hisinskinthe is translucent.

His eyes are fever-bright. technological innovations — such as He they invest. finds a feudal, agrarian system turn for the time and effortsiblings, a grief-stricken mother 2011 as a father.

Bitcoin exchange,empties grew totwo hanThe basic underpinning Bitmorethe packets of sugar into Bitmessage cli- his coffee.

Satoshi mined the even first tyrannical that premise was non-coercive and encouraged gener-Nakomoto and an had authoritarian, over 70 per world’sstill Bit-alive,” coin’s potential success between is that because it block(bhatsays. The old man lives in Providence, ent,hewhich allows of BitcoinsBound or “genesis block”, ous dialogues the landlords within the with pages ofdlethe book, is acent of the “Dad’s April 2013. north of Elsewhere, is decentralised not issued by any the in the family home. “It was a users tofour-bedroom receive a reward of 50photograph bitcoins. Negotiations kars) andand the peasants (mundkars), faithful of Filomenatowithcoin hertrades seven by chilOn February withdrawals government, in theory, it isthe free from inplace to grow Their mother died years ago, but the andup.”send efix the value ofdren, the first few and the converts, church and the temple. taken intransactions 1956. She sits serenely, clutching7, 2014, allgreat were halted

by Mt Gox. The company is- had terference andhere manipulation, unlike thein the father, now 97, a 98-year-old mails anony-girlfriend. “She used to love to were done onher Bitcoin forums; From on, the book basks pleasuryoungest son, notable belying perhaps the storm sued a statement “A out bugdancing. in the They world’s tangible fiat currencies.

In severhad a—great mously it time, my dad and her.” Then among them was trade of a pizza for faced able duality of unravelling Filomena’s world thatthe rages within.

Having the crushing saying, go bitcoin software possible al ways and however, it worksthe in mise the same had an for accident passed hasand helped fos- away suddenly, a few months 10,000 Bitcoins. elucidating en scene that BTC sil- or disappointment of her husband’s decline, she makes itshe someone to raisuse the Bitcoin to someone ago.network “He’s seeing newto now. But she don’t like to dance ter, are sure houetted her thinking and her exploits. is confronted with the daunting task of What is it used for? alter transaction it seem much.”

Still, she’s in her ’80s. A spry young thing! carryonly the legacy In Cuoto’s previous work, Goa: A Daughter’s ing seven children. Cuoto, awestruck by her details tosomake A Bitcoin can be used forendurance many purposes sendinganof Bitcoins“There’s to a Bitcoin time yet,”ofsays Pete. this cryptocurStory, she established her native land as an inmother’s has not like onlyacharted but its most important continues towhere, wallet“Filomena did not occur when in it did Wefact laugh, finishrency our coffees and go our separate ways. forward. imitable pivot of culture and learning, invalincredibleusecampaign be the buying seemed and selling Muchand likeyetoccur.”

It wasthe all downhill from there. idating the hackneyed platitudes her people to of liveit.with float above Manjula Padmanabhan, author and artist, tells us tales of her parallel life in are most often exposed to. Here, she carries on dire realities from which she protected her Elsewhere, USA, in this fortnightly series. marginalien.blogspot.in in the same vein, weaving a tableau of the peri- young children,” but also scanned a society od and social context. Giving a detailed ac- that continues to embellish India’s cultural count of the economic liberalisation of Goa landscape in its own unique way. (which at times makes for dreary reading) in the first decades of the century, she traces the urmi sengupta is a freelance writer based in Mumbai

The story of a mother, which also tells of the history and culture of Goa

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Desi state ofQuirky, mind

magnetic, very Indian

New York’s multi-cultural charm draws much from its South Asian ghettos and museums. Seek them out

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ew York City is crawling with Indians. Brash young desi bankers making moves on Wall Street. World-famous authors, prosecutors, lawyers, and criminals too. Cab drivers, corner shop workers, medical students, starving artists. Do you really want to add to this South Asian saturation? Of course you do. NYC’s drive and dynamism are unmatched. So is its cultural mix. And when you step off the beaten path, you’ll find a whole world that, thanks to decades of migration and exchange, is simultaneously Indian and not. So when you’ve finished with your business meetings or have tired of the crowded tourist attractions, maybe stay out a little later than planned or take the subway a bit further than you’ve ever gone, and add some achaar to your Big Apple experience. Here’s how.

They are the couple who sold a house to live their entrepreneurial dream…

Meet the founders of Chumbak, creators of uber-cool desi knick-knacks

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t’s almost a Bollywood story. The lead pair moved to a rented apartment and began were checking it out without us paying for it.

Aicon Gallery has a rich dream: to run a business selling working from there — discussing ideas with That was great for a start-up,” says Prabhakar.

The focus is contemporary South Asian art at Aicon, with roster of modern GR Iranna’s works on display at the products.

Aicon GalleryAnd in Manhattan quirky knick-knacks an Indian Fine feel lines masters like MF Husain and FN Souza, and current creators such as GR with Iranna, designers and commissioning Chumbak’s strategy from day one was to soul. Aspaintings they don’t have whose ‘Tempered Branches’, a solo show of sumptuousand large-scale and in- much mon- when business outgrew the house-cum-ware- not push products down people’s throat. He ey, they houseAsians to set up stallation, is up now (closes March 11). “Our audience is asell mixtheir of South andthe business. house, Prabhakar and Chadda moved to an says, “The reason our social media strategy AndSuhani like in Soin, the movies, their products become aunt’s place. “From there, we moved to a ware- worked is that we didn’t look at it as somegenerally interested New Yorkers,” says gallerist Jana who loves the hip a hit. Money starts energy of Aicon’s downtown location on a cobblestone street off thepouring Bowery, in andand they are house within a year,” he says. thing that required a return on inin profits six months. In the the visitors it brings to the cool gallery space. Androlling how’s the marketwithin for contempovestments. When the focus is only rary Indian art? “It’s gaining strength,” says Soin. next Wordthree to theyears, wise. their products go interna- Powered by likes on getting fans, the quality of intional; and in certain circles, it becomes un- Unlike most manufacturers, 35 Great Jones Street, Manhattan; 212-725-6092, aicongallery.com teraction suffers.” Social media alcool to not know of Chumbak — the Chumbak first created the merso proved handy for customer In the next year or Bangalore-based start-up that has made owls, chandise and then approached two, online will play service. “People would get in Rubin Museum of Art elephants and moustaches trendy.

There’s no more pleasant place to see art than the never-crowded Rubin, with its retailers. “Some stores agreed to touch with us online. It helped a stronger role, but In 2010, husband-wife duo amazing Himalayan collection — sculptures and scrolls that show the wealth andVivek di- Prabhakar stock our products. One thing build loyalty.” Even now, ChumI don’t see it going and Shubhra ChaddaTibet began Chumbak to man- that worked (for us) was that versity of devotional art from the mountains of India, Nepal, Bhutan, and bebak doesn’t rely on aggregators to beyond 30 per cent ufacture fridge that foreign visitors there was nothing like this in the yond. Receive an education from the excellent wall text, or entermagnets a contemplative sell online. “We ship directly and could‘From buy as souvenirs fromJuly India. “But we market. Retailers lapped up our state in the lavish Tibetan shrine room. A special show, India East’ (closes deliver within 24 hours,” he says. soon would 7), follows the Indian legacy in sculpture all the way to realised Thailandthat and we Korea.

Thehave Ru- to sell mil- products and we got traction But while social media may of them for aturns viable business model,” early. After 8-10 stores, people bin holds a terrific concert series as well; on Fridaylions evenings, the café into the have boosted Chumbak’s popsays Prabhakar, who is Chumbak’s CEO. stylish K2 Lounge. started getting in touch with us and the net- ularity, especially among the youth, only 22 and friends chipped in with more in- work expanded,” he says. This rapid growth per cent of its sales comes from online. “We 570 West 17th Street, Manhattan; 212-620-5000,Family rubinmuseum.org novative ideas. Somebody suggested T-shirts was despite the presence of brands like Happi- built the brand on social media. But we are not with an India theme, another mentioned ly Unmarried and Play Clan, which also offer Chumbak.com. We are Chumbak,” says PrabHindu Temple Society coasters.

“We began withGanesh six categories, in- somewhat similar India-centric knick-knacks.

There are plenty of temples in New York City but the Hindu Temple Society’s hakar, adding, “In the next year or two, online cluding coffee mugs, key—chains Temple is one of the largest and, with its classic South Indian architecture assem-and coasters.

Chumbak now has more than 2 lakh likes will play a stronger role but I don’t see it going Since we wereina the design not bled locally by Indian artisans — the most impressive.

Founded ’70s,brand, it’s now a necessarily on Facebook, the platform that helped make it beyond 30 per cent. It is a hybrid model and Stock ideas with a community centre; New York in thefoodies souvenir space, we started wholeofcomplex have discovered the looking at what it is today. “One of our biggest advantag- we are comfortable with it.”

Vivek Prabhakar, options and furnishings,” vegetarian canteen, and make their own pilgrimage to like thisbags suburban corner of he says. es in 2010 was Facebook. The FB page back CEO, Chumbak at Theare ₹40 fromfamilies the salewho of their Banga- then was very different, as it was not focused Quirks unlimited Queens for dosa and uttapam. But the temple’s core thelakh Indian his office in lore and house come from across the region for worship, festivals ritesbecame offeredtheir by a seed dozencapital. They on advertising. So if I posted a product, people For now, the company is focusing on adding grn Bangalore somashekar Sacred space The Rubin Museum of Art showcases devotional artwork the mountains of theand subcontinent South Indian priests. morefrom product categories making them 45-57 Bowne Street, Queens; 718-460-8484, nyganeshtemple.org. Take the 7 more widely available. New products and catetrain to Flushing Main Street, then 15-20 minute walk gories are decided based on the kind of business they can fetch. “We did it for fun in the Basement Bhangra first year, but at the end of it, we started taking “New York is the centre of the desi cultural universe!” DJ Rekha insists. “On any givcalls around pricing, usage and how displayen night you can experience art, film, music and literature produced and presented able a product was at stores.”

by South Asians,” says Rekha, a well-known DJ and cultural entrepreneur, who is a Phone cases, which didn’t even exist as a catpillar of this multi-arts scene. Her monthly party, Basement Bhangra — 17 years runegory at Chumbak even about six months ago, ning and going strong — gathers a funky mix of desis and cosmopolitan New Yorkare now bringing in 30 per cent of its reveers for bhangra mixed with reggae, electronica and more. Things start slow in the nues. It now has more than 30 product categolounge, often with art or poetry presentations; but once the whisky gets flowing ries including bobble-heads, boxer shorts, and the Sikh boys hit the dance floor, it’s game on. cushion covers, bags and laptop sleeves.

First Thursdays at 10 pm; 158 Bleecker Street, Manhattan; 212-505-3474, For wider distribution, rather than shops, lepoissonrouge.com Chadda and Prabhakar are now banking on kiosks within malls as that is more economRichmond Hill ical for them. “Chumbak is an impulse purJackson Heights gets more buzz, but the desi-diaspora neighbourhood par excelchase, not a planned one. We tested the first lence is Richmond Hill, Queens, where the Punjabi dhabas and gurudwaras of Lefone, a 150 sq ft kiosk at the Forum mall in Banferts Boulevard meet the bustle of Little Guyana, which stretches along Liberty galore. Just two weeks of data was enough for Avenue. Stroll down Liberty and dive into Indo-Caribbean life with its temples, masus to expand the format,” says Prabhakar. jids, jewellers, sari and lehenga shops, and markets. Chutney-soca streams from car Chumbak now operates 14 kiosks and expects windows and bars. At casual dining restaurants like Singh’s Roti Shop (131-18 Liberty to close the fiscal with 20.

Avenue), you’ll find West Indian specialties such as conch, salt fish and doubles, and After that, Chumbak will pause and think if there’s cricket on, dapper Trinidadian gents and other connoisseurs keen to dismatters over for a few months . “We’re putting cuss the match. in place technology to better understand Liberty Avenue from 112th to 135th Street, Queens. Take the A train to Leftrends on design,” he says. Now, that should be ferts Boulevard station, then walk around a magnet for more curious customers.

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siddhartha mitter is a New York-based journalist

Creole corner A curious Indo-Caribbean medley at Little Guyana along Liberty Avenue siddhartha mitter rashmi pratap

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few years, the final phase should be over too,” says Rathore. Accordingly, IMD’s observation, communications and computational systems upgraded, thestill National Dirty, open changedwere drastically, but we seem toWeather Foresecret As in Delhi revamped, High Perbehave ascast if itCentre were the same was bio-degradmuch as 50 formance Computing able material that will disappearSystems with thewere installed, per cent of Doppler planted along the monsoon.

But it isWeather not so —Radars now visible solid waste coastlines, especially the town, eastern coast, and garbage piles line every village and in India is of Automated Weather Stations, so much the of itnumber plastic, and it merely grows not bioover 1,000 andItcounting, added to. degradable and never diminishes. poses a serious s thanthoni Meanwhile, organisations like the Indian threat to our and the livestock’s health.

Centre forcausing Ocean Information ServicIt’s also, National in all likelihood, longes (INCOIS), Hyderabad, andand the National Interm pollution of toxins in the soil stitute of Ocean Technology (NIOT), Chennai, waterways; in this way also contaminatwhich are also under the MoES, have been exing our food chain. information data with While changing aiming for zero waste,and wesharing can “It is aby two-way process. While they improve the theIMD. situation immediately us oceanography-related informaadjustingprovide our habits in line with our we provide them meteorological upchangedtion, rubbish.

The government has dates,” says Rathore. prescribed the rules and regulations for In many has always been at this; we need to putways, themRathore into practise. the forefront of IMD’s modernisation.

When Our duty as citizens is to segregate our the waste. department’s first supercomputer was setmade the Indian subcontinent my home, precious biodiversity area but the en- household Even living in flats in 1989,we he was the principal scithe plastic bag was not the ubiquitous lightened park director — a legend in his without up gardens can selected compostasour entific officer.

“With the recent creature it is today — the occasional duty time — Sanjay Deb Roy, argued that the bio-degradable waste odourlessly by us-developments as well as the information we receive from satfree or M&S bag I brought were sought- damage done was minimal compared to ing effective microorganisms. ellites like after items that were used carefully and the benefit of having such a large constitIn India as muchINSAT as 50and per Kalpana-1, cent of thewhich provide updates everyconsists 30 minutes, our predictions many times over both by myself and oth- uency of park supporters. municipal solid waste of biodebeen foolproof,” says. “When I joined ers. Packaging was mainly paper, recyCertainly, the picnic damage was in- gradablehave items.

If these are keptheseparate plotted data manually, a cumbersome cled, used school exercise books and deed minimal: their discarded leaf plates from theIMD, rest,we they can be safely used for process.

Now we can load data into numerical such, and the iniquities of plastic and and cooked meal remains were food for energy, for cooking and/or for compost, tabulate to make a forecast.” other petroleum-based packaging was as the birds or composted quickly. There while themodels rest is and cleaner and can be recyWhile Rathore admits that the there’s a tendenwere no empty tetrapak drink cartons, cled or reused yet hardly known. more easily.

Imagine to play it safe, is quick to point out that In the early ’80s, I was working in Ma- no plastic or aluminium packets of salty saving tocyour landfills andhethe potential apart from Phailin and Lehar, IMD has not recnas, a beautiful national park of Assam, snacks. Even biscuits came in waxed pa- for cleaner energy. ommended evacuation for any of the other on the border of Bhutan. On a winter per not plastic wrappers. Economic major cyclones.

“The public at large probably gruisen is a wildlife weekend up to 100 busloads of visitors growth brings an exponential increase in joanna van don’t understand goes behind these deconservationist andwhat hotelier based would drive through the reserve to Moth- rubbish. How different a busload of photographer, but we have to be careful not to triganguri to picnic by the river. Many lunch debris might look now. near Pannacisions, Tiger Reserve ger alarm. It’s a very thin line at times, so we baulked at such huge crowds invading a In a couple of decades, our waste has are forced to take informed risks. But I make the final call and I do it after hearing from my best people,” says Rathore. verybody knows the quintessential Mohapatra, head of the Cyclone Forecast DiviWhile the cyclonic and other extreme Indian weatherman joke — “If the sion at the Indian Meteorological Department weather-related predictions place IMD in the weatherman says it’s not going to (IMD) was asked if the depression over Bay of spotlight, other routine, but equally imporrain, take your umbrella along.” Bengal, later christened Cyclone Madi, was a tant efforts often go unnoticed. Not only does While the severest critics and cynics might threat, he had calmly said no. the department have its finger on the pulse of still stand by this, a little-known yet extraor“We have a standard operating procedure. India’s weather, but it also maps the condidinary achievement by the IMD should be By looking at numerical models, wind flow, tions for the entire region. “The Regional Speenough to change the minds of doubters. wind-shearing patterns and other inputs, we cialised Meteorological Centre (RSMC) is part On October 9, 2013, a good three days before traced its exact trajectory in advance. We reac- of the IMD as well,” says Mohapatra, “From Cyclone Phailin’s landfall, LS Rathore, the di- hed the conclusion that it wouldn’t hit the Myanmar to Oman, it all falls under our purrector general of the IMD, and his team stated coastline,” says Mohapatra. “Madi was an in si- view. Every day, we also send across a Tropical that the cyclone would hit the coastline near tu condition, not forced by any earlier weath- Weather Outlook to several countries.” With Gopalpur, Odisha. And on October 12, the cy- er event, but we observed the developments regards to any major weather event in the reclone made landfall within 3km of the predict- and decided that once it crosses 13°N latitude, gion, the RSMC takes the final call. a guy who hadn’tit fed ingly2012, unflappable. he’s had a bit of ed mark, as close to a zero-error prediction as it would change or course.

Even though was more a Since a five-daySure weather forecast is than three people emerging unscathed from the humanly possible. The IMD’s call stood out, es- VSCS, the atmospheric and on an average practise —sent out, a major improvement day, orand pictured woods at least two contipecially since in the world of meteorology, oceanic conditions our 10,000 fans root- journalistic from few on years ago when only ing for him on Facebook up until nents after he made it to the top five on predicting the landfall of tropical cyclones readings of it, pointed towards 24-hour forecasts were provided June Desai seems surpris- MasterChef 2013. But They anyone who even within a 50-100km error margin is seen this shift,” helast says.year, The Rishi National byAustralia the department. have alPhailin was relatively as accurate. They had also anticipated that Disaster Management Associso increased the frequencies of easy. It was cyclone Phailin would be a Very Severe Cyclonic Storm ation (NDMA), just recovering specialised forecasts for agriculMadi that gave us (VSCS), a grade lower than a super cyclone from Phailin was more than reture, aviation and marine navitrouble, changing its forecasted by meteorologists in the US. With a lieved to hear this. The predicgation, and are looking to foray direction before wind speed of 210km/hr (minimum require- tion came almost a week before into new areas, such as forecasts hitting the coast ment for a super cyclone classification is the actual event mimicked the for industries. “Everything is 222km/hr), the IMD had got this right too. In pattern that the IMD had outweather -sensitive, even human retrospect, there was property loss due to lined. efficiency. Knowing how the Phailin, but loss of life was minimal. Thanks to next day or month is going to be IMD’s intervention, evacuation efforts had be- Mapping anew can help industries and businesses make their gun days before the cyclone hit Odisha and Since LS Rathore took over at the IMD two plans,” says Rathore.

Andhra Pradesh. years ago, there have been seven cyclones in At Mausam Bhavan, the IMD headquarters the subcontinent — Mahasen, Thane, Helen, on Delhi’s scenic Lodhi Road, there are a series On the right track Neelam, Lehar, Phailin and Madi. And in all of of portraits of previous IMD heads in the foyer, For Rathore and his team, the near-accurate these cases, the weathermen avoided any ma- including that of Sir John Eliot, the first direcprediction was only one of the more visible jor loss of life by making accurate forecasts, or tor general. Appointed in May 1889, Eliot could qualitative outputs of an ongoing process. by getting close enough to the predicted have scarcely predicted the fair weather at the “Phailin was relatively easy, it was Madi which ground location.

Mausam Bhavan today. Had he been alive, pergave us a lot of trouble,” says BK BandyopadFollowing the creation of the Ministry of haps, he might have even carried his umbrelhyay, a senior scientist at the department, add- Earth Sciences (MoES) in 2005, a modernisa- la, if the IMD’s forecast was cloudy with a ing, “Madi was more difficult because it tion plan in three phases (at a reported budget chance of rain. changed direction before hitting the coast.” of ₹920 crore) was put into force in 2009. “Two Hot property Rishi and Desaiwithin who made the topsibi five arasu at Masterchef Australia last year On the morning of December 6, when M phases were completed theit to next Eastern vortex An image of Cyclone Phailin as it makes landfall

joanna van gruisen

A BUTTERFLY BREEZE FROM MP

Waste not, want not

The contents of our garbage may have changed over the years, but we haven’t

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taying in a rural area, away from civic amenities, many aspects of life are brought into sharper focus. Waste and rubbish are major ones. There is no daily or weekly collector to remove it all from your door. (Nothing like having all your rubbish at home to concentrate and encourage thoughtful and cautious use, promoting zero waste.)

It hit us early: our first task was trying to keep the Sarai’s building site clean of non-biodegradable waste. Gutka packets would appear on every path, the sheen of their tiny squares seemed to glisten under every blade of grass.

How I longed for those pre-packaging days of the India I arrived in. So hard to believe now, but 35 years ago when I first

Chasing the storm

After predicting Phailin’s landfall last year, barely 3km off the mark, a near impossible feat, the Indian Meteorology Department is enjoying its season in the sun

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After the storm

As Masterchef Australia gears up for a new season this summer, Rishi Desai, a top contender for the title last year, talks about life after the cameras are turned off

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Men of science M Mohapatra, head, Cyclone Forecast Division; and (top) LS Rathore, director-general, both at the Indian Meteorological Department (IMD) in Delhi ramesh sharma

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followed his rise on the popular cooking competition will also tell you that this is hardly out of character for the 35-year-old, his poise palpable even in the early episodes of the show. No screaming matches, no tears shed when he was finally evicted from the Masterchef kitchen within days of the Champagne-popping finale.

Back in the real world now, Rishi teaches his six-year-old son to use a real knife in the kitchen. And juggles his day job at IP Australia — he is a chemical engineer who moved from Kolhapur to Queanbeyan, near Canberra, in 2008 — with his dreams of opening a restaurant someday. Until then he is writing a cookbook after hours, drawing up menus for pop-up dinners and toying with the idea of hosting his own TV show.

This is a crucial time for Rishi; one that will determine the course of his life in the next few years. Contestants of reality TV shows, no matter how popular, tend to be forgotten when the next season brings with it a fresh batch of people, a fresh batch of ideas. And Masterchef Australia is already in its fifth season — struggling to keep the interest of audiences alive; focusing more and more on the competition and less on the cooking. So has Rishi not considered making the most of this ephemeral celebrity by finding a patron to fund his restaurant?

“Someone had wanted me to start one right away. But I didn’t want to rush in,” Rishi chose to says Rishi. So he host pop-up, chose to host a by-invitation-only string of pop-up, dinners instead invitation-only of starting a dinners instead restaurant of his at the Burbury own right away Hotel in Canberra. “Think 16 hours of preparation, 300 plates, three hours, 48 diners, live demos — all this with one other person to help,” he says. It’s a model as demanding as any other. But Rishi seems to have made a success of it. Requests are pouring in for the next round of pop-ups in Sydney and Melbourne, and he recently hosted a lunch in a similar format at Adelaide.

Far too early to depart from his signature-style on the telly, the menu includes some of Rishi’s Masterchef specials: a coconut milk poached salmon, coconut and coriander rolls (suralichi wadi), slowcooked Kolhapuri goat and the curried mussel soup that proved to be his undoing in the semi-finals.

Combining two very different universes of food, Rishi borrows from traditional Indian kitchens and from his food hero Heston Blumenthal’s scientific multi-sensory approach. But is the idea of nouvelle Indian cuisine nouvelle anymore? Aren’t the likes of Vineet Bhatia, Gaggan Anand, Atul Kochhar and Manish Mehrotra already a long way down that road?

“The idea is not to trump them but to join them,” says Rishi, who would like to shift the focus away from north Indian fare to cuisines from the west, south and east. “Diners who love food don’t care if it’s chicken cafreal from Goa or baltihouse chicken tikka as long as it looks and SANJAYA BARU’S booka The tastes good.”

Hardly newAccidenargument, but tal Prime Minister: The Making certainly a compelling one.and Un-

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making of Manmohan Singh will be published later this year soity banerjee

DILLI DARBAR

It’s all about Mr Modi A ‘presidential’ twist to the parliamentary election has the analysts worried and the regional MEAL TICKET naintara parties in a flurry maya oberoi

A good grilling

The Swiss and French may be like chalk and cheese, but they do agree on raclette

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inter is slowly drawing milk cheese just right for melting, with a The cheese began to melt and blister. to a close here in Paris, washed brown rind and an interior the Smelling this, the raclette veterans with the sun making colour of pale barley, raclette is made on among us set down their wine glasses more and more appear- both sides of the Alps, and aged for up to and leaned forward like bloodhounds. As ances, usually when one is dressed for a year. Slices of raclette are the cheese began to bubble, the rain. This is the last month or so that heated until near-molten on people nudged it gently you will see any of the heavy winter clas- a grill, and then scraped from the pans, upon which sics: soon all the menus will change, the over boiled potatoes. Then it slid, slow and dramatic Raclette veterans raclettes and tartiflettes elbowed out by you add cured ham or sauclike lava, onto their plates. set down wine bright, veggie-filled spring things. isson, and gherkins or onI took a heap of potatoes, glasses and leaned I’m a little wary of Switzerland; such ions to cut the fatty richness. and some Parma ham, and forward like Man ofmy thecheese momentonto it. rude healthfulness, their misapprehenOur hosts bought almost coaxed bloodhounds Narendra Modi at a rally sion that a hike is a desirable after-lunch three kilos of raclette cheese “You should put some crème in Meerut in the lead-up activity and their laws banning minarets, at the Croix Rousse farmers’ fraiche it,” I was advised. rajeev bhatt to theon elections all warrant suspicion, in my opinion. I market, and some charcute“Cream? On the cheese?” much prefer the Parisians, who get their rie at the butcher’s. At home, I wasn’t convinced, but I exercise by complaining about broken we sliced the gigantic half-wheel of complied. Then I changed my stance. It ith 70 days left for a new govWhat can, however, be said, is that every wheels by making the campaign ‘non-presimetro escalators. But even I can’t resist cheese into thin wedges and boiled up was a simple but indulgent combinaernment to take charge in Del- now and then a ‘regional’ leader may spoil the dential’. Perhaps, even very municipal. that very Swiss invention, with all the hot, hi, it is now clear that these grand strategies that define a national camIn the very seat of the Dilli Darbar, very local tion, the raclette. rich, nutty cheese, the general elections will be paign. The late YS Rajasekhara Reddy did just factors have helped the emergence of a new The first time I ate stolid potatoes, the salt about whether India wants Narendra Modi to that in 2004. That election was about Atal Bi- ‘regional’ challenge to the national campaignone was in Lyon this from the ham and the be prime minister or not. The answer to that hari Vajpayee getting another term. While So- er. Other regional leaders are playing the old winter. How close this vinegar from the gherone single question will determine the out- nia Gandhi led the Congress campaign, she game of projecting themselves as potential lovely city, spot in the kins. And the cream recome of the poll. was not claiming the top job. In fact, the Con- PMs to mobilise local support for themselves. centre of France, is to ally did help those So it is not surprising that the Bharatiya Ja- gress warped the issue after Gandhi burnt her Telugu Desam founder NT Rama Rao did that Switzerland was substantial mouthfuls nata Party’s entire campaign strategy has been fingers in 1999, staking claim to form a govern- when he formed a National Front and projectbrought home to me slide down. (Always about projecting the image of its vote-gather- ment with the support of “272” MPs. ed himself as a prime ministerial aspirant to by its crisp, cold air and trust the French about er. So what if Lal Krishna Advani doesn’t like The BJP’s defeat in Delhi was engineered by ensure re-election in Hyderabad. The Left by its up-and-down hilbutter and cream.) this. Who cares if the Congress mocks this? YSR’s victory in Hyderabad. The dramatic de- Front did that with Jyoti Basu in Bengal in 1996 ly topography. One that The room smelt like Whatever the opposition may say, this is the feat of Chandrababu Naidu’s Telugu Desam to ensure CPM’s re-election at the State level. caused me to huff and the interior of a cheese bare fact of these elections. No wonder Arvind government in Andhra Pradesh, on the back of Except that comrade Basu took the campaign puff like a disappointwheel, which is no bad Kejriwal has chosen to directly target Modi. a campaign that YSR crafted and led, ensured seriously and thought he should become the ed nursery-rhyme wolf thing. It was a languid In almost every State, even regional political that the Congress got enough seats in the Lok prime minister. The politburo had to purge every time I left the flat, meal, everyone becomparties are being forced to define their politi- Sabha to form a coalition governhim of such ambitions. and by our lovely hosts’ ing more and more sucal platform on these terms. Interestingly, not ment. The voters of Andhra PraThis time round every State suggestion of raclette pine as the evening every regional party has fallen into this trap. desh took an electoral decision leader pretends he/she can be the one evening. progressed; by the end, Nitish Kumar’s haste in Bihar has made others based entirely on their local prefnext Deve Gowda. However, if the When in France, my several people were Can regional politics cautious. While Uttar Pradesh’s Mulayam erences, however, in the process, latest CNN IBN, Lokniti, opinion default response to half-horizontal on the Singh Yadav has had no option but to define they made a difference to the na- play a spoiler in this poll is reflective of public sentithings I don’t underfloor or the sofa, like year’s national his platform as an anti-Modi one, West Ben- tional outcome. ment, the strategy is not yet workstand is “oui” (in consloths or Roman empeelections?

That is gal’s Mamata Banerjee has been less strident The Congress’ long-standing ing. In Tamil Nadu, for example, trast to French rors at an orgy. I sudthe game in town in so defining hers. In Andhra Pradesh (the political enemy, the Communist the poll shows that both ‘national administrative offidenly remembered State is still called that!) and Tamil Nadu, re- Party of India (Marxist), then deleaders’, Rahul Gandhi and Nacials, whose default reTreasure Island, where gional party leaders have all fudged the issue. cided that an enemy’s enemy rendra Modi, are running ahead sponse to everything is marooned Ben Gunn The Telugu Desam Party, YSR Congress and could be a friend and offered supof the regional one, J Jayalalithaa “non”). So of course, I says wistfully, “Well, even the Telangana Rashtra Samithi Hot leaders port to the Congress to keep the of the AIADMK. Her party’s atand heavy Raclette cheese and potato, two important food groups shutterstock said yes at once. many’s the long night have kept their options open without posi- BJP out. In short, the dynamics of the parlia- tempt to project her as a potential PM has not Cautious enquiries I’ve dreamed of cheese tioning themselves against Modi. In Tamil Na- mentary system worsened the tactics of a pres- yet helped her gain traction. afterwards revealed that raclette is a an alarming quantity of potatoes.

— toasted, mostly — and woke up again, du, while DMK supremo Karunanidhi has idential campaign.

In Bihar, UP and West Bengal, regional parmelted mass of cheese and potatoes, a At eight, a group of friends, our hosts and here I were.” Here I were, and here warmed up to Modi, Jayalalithaa has truly disCan regional politics play a spoiler in this ties are using the same strategy of projecting relative of fondue. I winced a little. Fon- and we gathered around the low table in was real winter food for the mountains: torted the issue, targeting the Congress and year’s national elections in April? Can victory their leaders as potential PMs to garner supdue always seems daunting to me, some- the living room, where a raclette grill warming and extravagant, immoderate the DMK, while remaining silent on Modi. in the Dilli Darbar be shaped by the local pref- port. If they succeed, the elections will lose thing only Alpine skiers can digest had been turned on. If you don’t have a and comforting and festive. I slid lower Some political analysts have been critical of erences of some distant electorate? That is the their ‘presidential’ sheen. However, so far that unfazed, after a day of gliding up and chalet’s open fire on hand, there are two on my cushion, and put another wedge this ‘presidential’ twist to a parliamentary game in town. has not happened. Even in defining their platdown slopes. Still, we had walked a long kinds of raclette contraptions you can of cheese in my pan. At last, I had found election. Rahul Gandhi went a step further Having come to terms with the fact that the forms, Nitish Kumar, Mulayam Singh Yadav way uphill to brunch, I decided optimis- get — one kind holds a half-wheel of the an Alpine sport I could really get my and offered a spurious theory, saying the Con- Lok Sabha elections are indeed going to be and now, even Mayawati, have all had to refer tically. And back down too. cheese and heats it under a lamp, the oth- teeth into. gress party always allows its parliamentary presidential, and the single most important to Narendra Modi. So, this election is already The word raclette comes from the er heats individual portions of cheese on party to decide who would be PM! India’s gen- question for a great majority of the voters will naintara about him.

Time Lal is Krishna Advani maya oberoi a food writer basedunderFrench racler, “to scrape”, and means shallow little pans; this one was of the eral elections have, with a couple of excep- be whether or not they want Narendra Modi to instood that!

Paris t @naintaramaya both the cheese and the dish. A cow’s latter variety. tions, only been about who would preside preside over the Dilli Darbar, his opponents sanjaya_baru@hotmail.com over the Dilli Darbar. will naturally want to throw sand in his

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A shadow of himself The town that cried leopard

Mahendra Singh Dhoni was the captain who could do no wrong. But his selection decisions and thetail results overseasbig leave desired On the of Meerut’s cat, much BLink to hasbea few close encounters with rumour-mongers, pranksters, dodgy local reporters, harried officials and yes, Mr Spots himself

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ahendra Dhoni’s survival t 10am on Singh February 28, Sushant instincts, of late, forest have been reSharma, divisional officer, peatedly challenged, evenaascall. the Meerut district, received Mr the Cool of Indian cricket 24, atSince incident of February tempts reinvent his image.

The leader of he had to attended hundreds of calls and this men is lost for important. direction and words as Khurahe enone was no less It was Neeta ters his career’s crucialVidyalaya phase in the run na, principal of most a Kendriya in Meeup defend the World Cup so glorirut tocity.

Panic-stricken, she that had he called the ously in 2011. Times have for forest won department because herchanged staff had him, his team Later has failed to live up toshe exfoundand ‘pugmarks’. that day, at 2pm, pectations. manthe to lead the team,” called again“The to best inform department of declared the national some disturbing CCTVselectors footage,when whichDhoni capwas handed the job forofthe firstlooked time atlike Bangatured the movement what the lore in 2007, in the One DayWith Internaleopard within thetruncated school premises. the tional Australia. same India board against exams starting theThe next day,year Khurana won the inaugural T20 World underwere his wasn’t taking any chances.

TheCup students captaincy. cricket an packed off Indian and the army had was discovered called in. The aggressive captain whothat washad willing to move search for the leopard brought Meeaway traditional safety-first rut tofrom a haltthe a week ago, began afresh. attitude and the pattern of defensive field placements n February 24, residents Meerut awoke and bowling changes.

Here of was a man who situation they were completely undaredtotoaexperiment. prepared for. A had now, strayed from beDhoni has, forleopard some time stopped inyond the army area and novating; his cantonment attack instincts havesought been refuge at a timber merchant’s godown in Sadar Bazaar, before heading to the cantonment hospital, where he was locked inside a ward for nearly 10 hours. Hundreds gathered outside the hospital. Cameras flashed relentlessly.

The army, the police and the forest depart-

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first to admit that.out Heto can self-critishelved as he into looksaction. to shepherd of be ment swung A teamhis of team doctors all the of them have turned bebe dead ends. newcomers.

“Too defensive,” notes former In- cal, is known to stand players and this from the Noida-based Wildlife Trust of India “They were paw printsby ofhis dogs.

All week.

No himhekeep hisand job.proceeds to take out a dia captain Bishan Bedi, known his helps (WII), armed withSingh tranquiliser guns,fortook big cat,” says, Dhoni’s attention to detailout is his “He honest comments.

Dhoni’s first the Test leopard as cap- notepad their positions.

Inside the ward, and scale, sketching theforte. measureread game paw superbly and is10x9cm ahead of tain, South Africa at KanpurIt in 2008, grew against more and more distressed. dug its can ments of the a leopard — roughly — easeKumar, with which in was a success. is a mere shadow of that claws, almost But onehe centimetre deep, into the others. for SDOThe Sanjiv who he hassettled comedown in with cool ably slipped in- international cricket an earlyappearance. indication walls,and andcalm tookskipper, a 12-feetwho leapsotowards the ceilthe latest report of a was rumoured of histhey’ve calibre,”seen, says former nationto role and commanded thefan and twist- The ‘pugmarks’ ing,the clawing its way through the including the al selector Kiran Dhoni had respect of seniors like Sachin Ten-through the one at Kendriya ing it out of shape.

Later, it tore Vidyalaya, areMore. half that size. played six months of meminterdulkar, Rahul VVSseven Laxman concrete wall,Dravid, injuring people on its For a weekhardly now, eight teams with five national cricket when coach and and Sehwag. way Virender out, bounding over a 10-foot bers each, have fanned out across Former Indiadarts skipper former master high wall. Three wereSourav fired at Dhoni has stopped the city Australian on a 24-hour vigil. Greg Each Chappell, a selection meeting, Ganguly findsstruck.

Dhoni’s it; only one Nocaptaincy one has time a in sighting is reported, innovating, his proclaimed him as India’s “future stagnant.

“He’s become very resighted it since. crowds gather at the site.

“I’ve noattack instincts Wherever a leopard captain.”

It was astute petitive.

There is a shut predictable A two-day curfew the city ticed a band of an youth thatobservaassemhave been shelved sighting is reported, tion of the finest shouting students method to histhe captaincy, whichapis down after mysterious bles byatone these places, a band of youth easy to read opponents. of I of the game. pearance and for disappearance ‘tendua aa gaya, tendua dikh gaya’. gathers and shouts, Dhoni learnt the tricks the would want him to take thelimped initiathe leopard.

Meerut has They scare the residents, getoftheir “tendua aa gaya” trade on his own, “He setive notinwait to backand to life the for daysthings that folpictures clicked for observed the papers Ganguly, happen.”

But Ganguly a lone voice of dissent niors like Tendulkar, lowed, but the fear of is the leopard and runDravid, away,Sehwag, laughing,” says dressing room and grew as a because many, including Sunil Gavaskar, who Laxman in the continues to stalk its townsfolk.

In Sharma.

Despite the-boy-whoat how hering handles therumours, media,” is fairly of critical support scores calls,of Dhoni, residents have his captain- person. Lookcried-wolf to these says More.and Having excelled in all forms of the cy untilin thetoWorld Cupsuspicious in Australia‘pugmarks’, next year. called report the forest police departments can’t afford Dhoni ismovements, not a perfectdogs captain and he would Dhoni recognised the for potential shadowy barking and pea- game, to let their guard down, even a day. of the and whipped them cocks calling. “For two days after it was first younger Stories players in local newspapers have only into addeda unit, tales especially at home.horror show sighted, I got at least 100 calls every day. Now, I winning to the panic... of a “leopard repeated failure spotted to win ainTest series get 15,” says DFO Sharma. “Initially, they were in India’s Ghaziabad”, a leopard Hastinais oftenone unfairly to Dhoni’s to report sightings, but now people mostly overseas pur and another foundlinked in Muzaffarnagar, HeMeerut is yet toleopard win a series in England, call to enquire.” Since February 24, 10 places in captaincy. even as the resurfaces with New Zealand and The the city have reported suspicious activity and Australia, great regularity on paper.

It South wouldAfrica. seem that recent debacles in South Africa and New Zealand, where India failed to win even a match has dented his image of a successful captain.

Former England captain Mike Brearley, in the Art of Captaincy, writes a captain must have “some ability as a player. He must have common sense. He needs to know the game, and have ‘leadership qualities’, whatever they are.

He must be willing from time to time to take an unpopular line.” Dhoni symbolises that, even though, of late, he has come under intense scrutiny for some of his tactics.

At 32, he has been criticised for backing a set of players, a “coterie” as a former cricketer bemoaned. His preference for Ravindra Jadeja ahead of Pragyan Ojha as a left-arm spinner in Tests and shunning leg-spinner Amit Mishra to the bench have been glaring oversights.

“He is making the most of what is available. He has a poor bowling attack at his command and you can’t win overseas with this kind of attack. He picks a fair XI,” says More.

But critics highlight Dhoni’s indifference towards talent like Ishwar Pandey and Mishra, his inexplicable fondness for a struggling Suresh Raina, and his role in keeping out Gautam Gambhir and Harbhajan Singh.

Some fine captains, like Sunil Gavaskar, Bedi, Steve Waugh, Clive Lloyd, Ian Chappell, at different stages, notably Chappell, have had their brushes with the administration but Dhoni has had unstinted support from the Board. It has helped and harmed him, made him authoritative and oblivious to criticism. He knows nothing can shake him from the exalted seat of captaincy, not until the World Cup in Australia early next year.

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Heaven help MS Dhoni keeps an eye on the ball but misses the catch in a recent test in New Zealand ap/ross setford

vijay lokapally is deputy editor (sports) The Hindu

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An app to pee Now a new app helps find loos you can use

census for the prey base here. But Col Ahlawat informs us that all dogs, barring one, have returned. The leopard has hunted, we hope.

As the light rain turns into a hailstorm, the DFO and the WTI team head back to the forest department office. On the way, the DFO inspects the traps, which will be laid for the leopard later that night along with cameras to track it. “There’s a 50-50 chance of success,” says Dr Singhai. Talk veers to choosing an appropriate bait. Dogs are vetoed — “bahut halla machate hain (they make a lot of noise)”. Goats get a go-ahead — “bakri nahin, inhumane ho jayega. Bakra le leten hain (not a nanny goat, it’s too inhumane, a billy goat is okay)”.

Back in office, they start work on a new strategy. “Personally, I think it can be left alone, now that it’s in its habitat” says Sharma, porollywood producer Sunil ing Bohra over maps. The nearest settlement is Mahas decided to share production mepur village, about 500m away. Beyond that credits with his one-and-a-half-yearlie vast swathes of forests. “But the army wants old Labrador Zora for his next usfilm, to clear the area,” he says. Besides, without which is on the dreaded underproof, the spectre of fear will continue to world don and B-town pal Dawood haunt the city.

Ibrahim. The adorable Zora, Bohra says, “is like my child. I need her luck on my side.” When asked if his family (read fiancée) would object, he says, “No at all, in fact, she bought a jeep for Zora to go on long drives.”

First-time director Bohra’s film is a comedy about a fan travelling to meet Dawood. Forget the script, we are curious to know if Zora would be the one barking, “lights, camera... and action!”

Take a bow, Zora In a cinematic first, a dog gets producer credit

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merican app designers have come up with AirPnP to come to the rescue of those who just can’t hold it in anymore. The app is modelled on the concept of the now popular AirBnB, which helps find places to stay, only AirPnP helps find places to pee. The webbased app was tested at the Mardi Gras festivities in New Orleans this year, where a constant complaint has been the difficulty in finding a loo and the lack of options, which means people attend to nature’s calls out in the open, leading to stinky streets and hefty fines.

With AirPnP, for a nominal price, you can rent out your toilet and those who need to relieve themselves, can do so discreetly. We wonder how an app like this would work in Indian cities. Perhaps, an outdoor version might be handy here?

Trash talking Nepal orders climbers to conquer a mountain of garbage on the Everest

Chak de India only please Rooting for Pakistan’s cricket team makes you ‘anti-national’

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oth Andrew Waugh, the British surveyor general of India and George Everest, Waugh’s mentor after whom the mountain was named would spin in their graves if they heard of the travails of the mountain today. Facing stiff protests ast week, students of a private university in Meerut, UP, assemfrom environmentalists and mountaineers over bled at their community hall to watch the Asia Cup match bethe humongous amount of garbage on the tween India and Pakistan. In the last over, when Shahid Afridi mountain, latest estimates put it at 50 tonnes Natural disaster the Nepal government has decided towns and villages in western Uttar Pradesh the colonel’s wrath. After a few sharp smashed Ravichandran Ashwin, Kashmiri remarks,sixes off According to data collected by the students Ministry and counting, (clockwise from top) are playing reluctant hosts to a sudden con- the colonel hops into his jeep andbroke A brawl and ensued, followed drivesinto at applause. of Environment Forests (MoEF)byinstone2013, to make all climbers bring back some of the A resident of Meerut gregation of leopards from all over the region. breakneck speed, heading to the cross-counthrowing and653 then, the Kashmiri students werethan beaten up. persons were killed and more 17,000 waste.

Among other things, waste on the Everest avoids a collision with the Last week, local newspapers reported a leopEnraged at their enthusiasm for Pakistan’s on-field victotry area — grounds abutted by forested land — injured by leopards in the last decade in 12 is said to include bodies of climbers who died on ; leopard on February 23 AP ard on the prowl at villages on the Ghaziabad- within the cantonment. ries, they were branded ‘anti-national’ home to states, including UP. Whileand thesent suburbs of a policeman charges atempty it the mountain, oxygen bottles, torn tents Meerut border. A helpline number was also protect “communally sensitive Meerut”.

They were Colonel Deep Ahlawat joins the group.

The aMumbai have seen leopards routinely stray inwithand a baton at the food containers. Adding to the gardiscarded AP; cantonment hospital are circulated; a wrong number that was “tempo- area, he tells us, is preparing for a horse show slappedto with a fineareas, of ₹5,000 and nowan face chargesinof urban UP has seen alarming bage problem the frigid temperatures which and suspected pugmarks in rarily not in service” since its debut in the pa- scheduled shortly. That morning, Dafedar Ansedition.

Apparently, the university crease in man-animal conflictswon’t in theentertain last two prevent degradation of any waste material. the Begum Pul area PTI pers. applicants from Kashmir this year. As expected, kush, had heard the leopard roaring. All the months.

The notorious maneater of UP, which In a statement to the press, Madhusudhan Burincident snowballed yetthe another dogs in the area had suddenly disappeared thishas killed has seven people, is into still on loose.po“It lakoti, joint secretary, Nepal Tourism Board said, controversy. depends on how you look at man-animal con“From now on, a climber is required to bring n Saturday, March 1, a local reporter and the nilgai herd had moved too. “I have litical matches areDr notAbhijeet new to I’d callIndia-Pak this straying,” says down eight kilograms of waste, and that excludes thrusts his mike and flashes the camera lived close to Corbett National Park,” says An- flict. While at a drowsy DFO. “I’ve not slept properly in the kush, “I can tell when it’s a big cat.” partisan — from remember the Bhawal of WTI,viewership who has come Kaziranga their own empty oxygen bottles and human last week,” says Sharma. His cheeks are puffy, 1999 riots at Eden Gardensto over TendulThe weather in these parts has Wildlife Sanctuary help out. dung. We will not compromise on this and deeyes red with exhaustion, and his waistline been capricious the last week. In kar’s run out — thisofboorishness is now “The forests UP are not protectfaulters will face serious legal action.” has shrunk to the third hole of his belt, he between bursts of heavy rain, getting ed tiring.

It’s just a game, people! UP, by buffer zones.”

In western complains. Theories on the whereabouts of even hailstorms, the skies have sugarcane fields and settlements “Some of the the leopard are exchanged — some within rea- snuck in some much-needed sunsit cheek-by-jowl with the forests. pugmarks are just son, many incredible. One of the incredible- shine. The horses practising for In the season for cutting (Novemseven hours old” variety is that the leopard, love-struck, has the show have left a marked trail ber to March), such conflicts instrayed into the city to locate its premika or the on the soft soil. Amid those trails, crease, says Dr Dhawal. The DFO she-leopard from Jarauda recently rescued by the pugmarks of a big cat are unlooks on wearily. “But the leopard the department. If such rumours aren’t doing mistakable. The leopard has been is over 5km away from the city. enough damage already, there is another one here, as early as that morning. “Some of the Meerut is safe now,” he declares, before walkrapidly gaining ground — it’s about time the pugmarks are seven hours old,” says Dr Sau- ing out to relay the same message to the press. leopard look a kill; missing ven as she attempts to stall the release of Gu- hunted. bi Gang So rose intofor prominence in the rabh noughties, Singhai from WTI. “They’re certainly a The sighting of the pugmarks is the singlecattle even humans. laab Gang — starring Madhuri Dixit andpoultry, Juhi dogs, riding on or the work they did for theleopard’s. women of There is no doubt about it,” he says. most credible evidence found by the forest de1pm on Saturday, the members DFO’s Soon Chawla, Sampat Pal has lost her place in At thearound the region.

Lately, however, claim a that packet of plaster of paris arrives and partment since its first encounter with the phone again.

This time it looks a casts“She gang of Pink Sisters. According to reports, dis- buzzes Pal has turned selfish and like autocratic. is for the pugmarks. They will be Meerut leopard on February 24 (the rest of Inare made Colonel RK Sharma summons supporting Congress and not AAP… she wentagainst to content is brewing in the original gang.credible Dis- report. checked the pugmarks from the hos- dia could briefly track him on twitter at DFO and WTI team Lal Kurtimoney police at pital. gruntled members are apparently upsetthe over Biggthe Boss… she istominting the cost ofof them are more than a day old. In @MeerutLeopard). After placing the traps last Some is close to the cantonment area. the Pal’s “involvement in self-promotion”. station, At a which the organisation,” says GG’s national convenor cantonment’s forested land, spread over week, the leopard has not made an appearrifle into the jeep, he While hurries aon.full-time meeting of the group in Banda district, Loading UP, it his Jayprakash Shivhare. com160 acres and rich in prey base, the leopard ance in the city. The DFO is relieved. “Maybe, I information leaked the 23,seems will be has elected on to March Pal's to pink was decided that Pal would neither be Meanwhile, their mander have found its natural home. “It may can get a good night’s sleep now,” he says. two members ofgiving the local press brigade is surely her the alblues.have lived here for years and we may not have commander nor a primary member. Pal’s media Gula- and so make an appearance at the station, inviting known,” says the colonel. There has been no priyanka kotamraju

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Gulabi Gang’s leader Sampat Pal gets the axe

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cornerstone in-faq by joy bhattacharjya

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eopards in UP, feline noir on the Net and now, the grand opening of Lady Dinah’s Cat Emporium, Britain’s first cat café, where you can spend time with 10 in-house cats or bring your own… It’s just the right time for a cat quiz.

Cats big and small

1

Melody, Valerie, manager Alex Cabot and roadie Alan M are four of the five main members of which music group? I know this is the kind of stuff you pretend to have never read, but answer anyway!

2

In 2000, which film became the first foreign language feature to get 10 Oscar nominations?

3

The Liger, a cross between a lion and a tigress, found only in captivity, is considered to be the largest of the felines. Which is the largest feline found in the wild?

4

For what reason did physicist Allan MacLeod Cormack and electrical engineer Geoffrey Hounsfield share a Nobel in medicine in 1979?

5

Which bestselling tune in one of the most popular musicals of all time is sung by a puss named Grizabella, played most notably on stage

by Elaine Paige?

the new york times crossword-0119

it’s only “a” game

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The name of which specific cat colouring originates from a city on the Malabar coast?

The Japanese maneki-neko or ‘fortune cat’ is one of the most ubiquitous good luck charms in Asia. Traditionally, how is the cat depicted in a maneki-neko?

8

We tend to remember Clive Lloyd as cricket’s ‘Big Cat,’ thanks to his amazing reflexes. But which English cricketer of the ’90s was nicknamed ‘The Cat’ because of his propensity to doze off in the dressing room?

9

Socks, the cat, was the official White House pet during the administration of which American president?

10

Which 19th century artist and author was so devoted to his cat that when he moved to Italy, he asked his architect to build a replica of his English home so that his tabby, Foss, would not feel distressed? He also drew his cat in one of his most famous rhymes.

Answers 1. Josie & the Pussycats, and I will not believe you even if you pretend to have never read an Archie comic!

2. Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon. It is a cat quiz.

3. The Siberian Tiger 4. For creating the CAT scan – Computerised Axial Tomography – now more commonly known as the CT scan. (Admit it! It's a nice question, even though it's a bit of a stretch on the theme) 5. Memory, from Cats, based on TS Eliot’s Old Possum’s Book of Practical Cats 6. Calico, from Calicut 7. Sitting up with one paw lifted. Depending on the charm, it could be either paw.

8. Phil Tuffnel 9. Bill Clinton, in 1997. Socks had to finally give way to a dog in the White House.

10. Edward Lear, you can see Foss in the illustrations of The Owl & The Pussycat

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joy bhattacharjya is, in this age of television pundits and Facebook gurus, simply grateful that facts are not opinions. t@joybhattacharj

ACROSS 1 Last name in Scotch 6 Stream 10 Bloke 14 Like blokes 18 Napoleon, e.g., twice 19 Steakhouse order 20 Test subject 22Grand-slam drama that stars Bacall’s man 24 Half an Xmas “Halls” chant 25 1976 horror hit, with “The” 26 Point value of an A in Scrabble 27 Little to no 29 Heavily favored 30 All-inclusive 32 Beat poet Cassady and others 33 Captain Hook’s right hand 34 69-Across, e.g.

37 Scrams 38 Astral saga that has a Darth part 42 Cutting edge 43 Gulager of TV’s “The Virginian” 44 French Oscar 46 Bit of Google

programming 47 Staple of a waiting room 48 Work on the roof, say 50 “Movin’ ___” (TV theme song) 52 One of die Planeten 53 Kitty, e.g.

54 Count ___ 55 “___ Anything” (“Oliver!” song) 56 “The Witches” writer 57 King Arthur of tennis 59 Kris ___ (music duo) 61 Like classical poetry 63 Fab “backward-gram” à la “Sam, aha! Bahamas!”

67 Burger topper 68 Segway inventor Dean ___ 69 Apple product 70 Bird’s gullet 71 Chip on one’s shoulder, say 73 Kowtowers 75 Pilates targets 78 Take on 79 Poses 80 Stone figures?

81 Equal to the task 82 Objective 83 Louis Armstrong, to friends 85 Two-time U.S. Open

champ 86 Houston’s old ___ Field 87 Black cat that packs grass and chants “Jah” 91 Prefix with -hedron 93 Best-selling novelist Susan 94 Great Basin natives 95 An op-ed has one 96 Air apparent?

97 Worships 100 “Common Sense” pamphleteer 101 Valedictorian’s pride, for short 102 Bygone Bombay bigwig 106 Landmark vassal law act 108 Warm mask/cap amalgams 111 Burning desire 112 Puts away 113 Friends, in Firenze 114 Big name in faucets 115 Depict 116 Swarm 117 Where Sharp Electronics is based

DOWN 1 Chrysler Building style, informally

2 Physical, e.g.

3 Smart-alecky 4 “M*A*S*H” star 5 One in a gray suit 6 Modernist Kafka 7 A bridge might have one 8 “The Lord of the Rings” villain 9 “Pop” goer 10 Online gaming guilds 11 Gatekeeper’s cry 12 Lawyers’ org.

13 Picasso’s designer daughter 14 Tilex target 15 Latin 101 verb 16 Score creator Schifrin 17 Style 21 Subject of the documentary “An Unreasonable Man” 23 Spoils 24 Two-faced 28 Haphazard 31 Gift shop buy 32 Sign at an intersection 33 Apple product, perhaps 34 Recipe amt.

35 Skin soother 36 Gala that saw “Black Swan,” “Avatar” and “Ab Fab” attract claps

37 Bar glass that’s half Bass, half dark malt 38 Lama’s art that can’t last 39 “Shazam!”

40 Noted political maiden name 41 Designer McCartney 43 Comedian Margaret 45 “___ hear” 48 Something woeful 49 Item of attire for 54-Across 51Square meals that are round 52 Minneapolis suburb 54 Jackie of “Shanghai Noon” 58 Maine senator after Mitchell 60 Striped Girl Scout cookie 62 Knocks 63 Zodiac symbol 64 Pier place 65 Adams and Alcott 66 Most handy 72 ’70s self-help course 74 Word repeated in the “Superman” intro 76 Alliance 77 Meaning: Fr.

81 Flashback and halfbacks 84 Eyelashes 86 That, in Tijuana 88 Source of excitement 89TV/movie group associated with this puzzle’s theme?

90 Agave drink 92 In the slightest 93 Apple product 95 The Adversary 96 Jerk 97 Day-and-night, in a way 98 Belafonte hit 99 Dungeons & Dragons figure 100 Strait-laced 101 Elation 103 Reebok alternative 104 Hike, with “up” 105 The East 107 It goes before E except after C 109 Whiz 110 Vientiane native

By Will Shortz

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