It was the summer of 1997. I visited my grandparents’ house in the quaint port town of Dover, England. On this particular evening, my sister and I had just come back from a long day of frolicking around the village and playing in the countryside. We looked through the kitchen window overlooking the backyard and saw a neighbour’s cat scamper by. Now, I don’t recall how the exact conversation between three-yearold me and my seven-year-old sister went, but I know that within the hour, it was decided between the two of us that my new identity was a little black kitty-cat named Leaves. Later, at dinner, I devoted myself to the role wholeheartedly by sitting on the ground throughout the entire meal and refusing to answer the verbal pleas from my mother with anything other than “Sorry, cats can’t talk” and meows. That night I ate from my sister’s hand feeding me under the table. The next day my grandmother managed to convince me to eat a full bowl of peas I had initially refused, by insisting that they were a primary part of a cat’s diet.
This event marked the dawning of my unfathomable love for cats. Unfortunately, as both my sister and father are extremely allergic to cats, my dream of having one for myself has never come to fruition. That, however, hasn’t stopped my determination of someday having a kitteh of my own to love. I lament that this dream of mine will remain unfulfilled until I move out of my super-convenient free home, and that even then I may need to take some time to save money or find a place that allows pets. Luckily, in the meantime I can bond vicariously with my friends’ cats.
One friend of mine has aptly named her cat Figaro, due to his resemblance to the cat in Pinocchio. I have worked hard to befriend this kitteh, and I think my endeavors have paid off. He no longer runs away when I’m close to him, and has come to sit by me to be stroked on multiple occasions. If you’re looking for a surefire way to merit validation from a kitty, worry not, I will tell you my method. First, I got the cat used to my presence by sitting next to him and getting as many pets in as I could before
he ran away. Next, I decided to make myself more relatable for Figaro by getting down on all fours and serenading him with the aria “Voi che sapete” from Le nozze di Figaro. The song is sung in the opera by a youthful boy, suffering through the agony of continually falling in love. I feel that this song suitably resonates with my situation: I am constantly falling in love with cats, fluffy and sheared, docile and irritable, and know all too well that visceral clench in my heart that tells me this creature must be cuddled! I am sure that Figaro both understood and appreciated the parallelism and motif that underlined my tribute — make sure to take the cat’s personality into account for this step. Finally, my most result-inspiring stratagem was to feed Figaro some Temptations (use whatever brand of treats is popular with your cat target) while returning all his possessive neck-nuzzles with some of my own. This ensures him that I am appreciative of his sign of affection, and consolidates our bond. So if you are like me, and find yourself constantly infatuated with adorable kitties but without one of your own, do what it takes to make a connection. All it takes is ten to thirty minutes out of your day to have a meowing conversation and make a pawsiblesomeday friend.
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NEWS
SFU has plans to rollout an on-campus Indigenous catering option on Burnaby Campus this September. The university is in the midst of working out a contract with a traditional Aboriginal caterer that would be able to prepare and serve authentic cultural dishes, blessed by elders, at Aboriginal events on campus. Due to the agreements that SFU has in place with its two current catering services, events on campus must be catered by either the SFU Dining Services and the Simon Fraser Student Society (SFSS) Food and Beverage Services. This has posed a challenge for the Aboriginal community on campus since the provided services cannot offer the traditional foods typically served. The First Nations Student Association (FNSA) and the SFSS first brought this to the attention of
SFU’s campus and community radio station CJSF is holding their eighth annual Radio Kids Camp for children ages eight to 12. The program gives children the opportunity to learn about the inner workings of a radio station, equips them with radio journalism skills to produce content, and allows them to take over the air on the final day of the camp. This year’s camp will run from August 10 to 14 and will accommodate approximately 10 participants. “We wanted to do an alternative summer camp,” said CJSF program assistant Gurpreet Kambo.
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administration nearly two years ago, and have been advocating for it ever since. Tsatia Adzich, leader of the FNSA’s Indigenous Catering Initiative, explained the significance of having their own caterer. “Food is a very essential part of a celebration,” said Adzich. “Food brings people together and that’s really what this is all about. [It] is creating that community and that safeness.” She expressed frustration at the length of time this has taken and what she sees as relatively little progress. Adzich stressed that this is a particularly important issue for the FNSA to have Aboriginal caterers at Aboriginal
events, especially as SFU’s campuses are situated on unceded Coast Salish territory. The SFSS issued an official letter of support for Aboriginal catering on campus last March, in addition to a similar statement in favour made by the SFU Office for Aboriginal Peoples. They, along with the Indigenous Student Centre, have also been in consultation with SFU’s Ancillary Services throughout the process. For Dan Traviss, manager of SFU’s Dining Services, it has taken longer and been more complex than Ancillary Services initially expected.
He outlined some of the obstacles that the university has faced in bringing about the policy change, such as insurance and liability, food safety certifications, consultations with different stakeholders, and ensuring that an external caterer would respect SFU’s stance on sustainable packaging and fair trade. Adzich voiced concerns about a lack of consultation with the FNSA. “I was very clear that I wanted to be an active member of the process,” she said. She added that they have had difficulties with arranging caterers with SFU in the past and she hopes they can continue to work together to resolve the issue.
She added, “If this process were approachable and easy to navigate for students in general, the relationship between students and administration would be better.” Traviss responded to her concerns, “We tried to be as transparent as we could. [. . .] There’s a number of things that were important to us. “It did take a bit of time, both with getting an agreement written out and with stakeholders, how are they going to order, who are they going to go through — all of those logistical things.” He said that SFU is in talks with the preferred caterer of Aboriginal groups on campus, Cedar Feast House Catering, and that they are working to establish a “pilot agreement” with the company. The agreement would cover service to SFU’s Burnaby campus only, as the contracts with other campus caterers would require a different approach. The university’s catering agreement with its Burnaby caterers expires in 2017, at which time there will be the opportunity to revisit the food contracts details before going out to tender. He stressed that Aboriginal catering is the first priority and referred to SFU’s new Aboriginal Strategic Plan. “We’re on Salish land. We see it as important.”
Kambo explained that due to the nature of CJSF being a campus and community radio station, providing alternative content on air is both a key priority and requirement.
we want to be able to provide that opportunity,” continued Kambo. “We should be taking their intellectual and creative contributions more seriously.” The camp will include workshops facilitated by CJSF staff and volunteers on storytelling, interviewing and field recording, beatboxing, and basic training in the “OnAir” studio. The participants will also have the opportunity to do “streeters,” where they will approach passersby on campus to ask them a question of their choice. A new addition to this year’s camp is a tour of CBC Vancouver’s Radio and TV studios on the third day. “It sort of fits into our magic theme,” said Kambo, “because it’s going behind the scenes to see what the magic is, and how the CBC comes together, because they produce such great stuff.”
On the last day of the camp, the participants will put their newly developed skills to use as they take over the station for a few hours. “They’re going to be the DJs, and the hosts, and the reporters, the interviewers, and they’re going to decide what music gets played and what are
the important stories to tell,” Kambo explained. In between all the hard work and training, the campers will also be making T-shirts and buttons, swimming at Kensington pool, hiking to Burnaby Mountain Park, and enjoying some sweet treats including pizza and ice cream.
The theme for this year’s camp is magic. “There’s kind of a magic in producing audio,” explained Kambo. “With film or radio [. . .] you don’t necessarily know exactly how it came together, there’s kind of a magic to that. We want to go behind the scenes and break that down and give the kids access to that. “In terms of our philosophy, and being community-oriented, we feel that youth also have an important voice, and
NEWS
CreativeMornings is back at Woodward’s this week. Visit the Djavad Mowafaghian World Art Centre at the Goldcorp Centre for the Arts on Friday, August 7 at 8:30 a.m. for a talk by Dana Chisnell. Her claim to fame is that she has established effective design literacy techniques that help government workers to create the best local election design for voters. Considering Canada’s upcoming election, Chisnell’s talk is not to be missed!
The next event of the City Conversations series titled “Future of the Viaducts: The City Staff’s Report” will be held on Thursday, August 6. The session is centred around a report prepared by Vancouver City Council staff regarding “the condition of the Georgia and Dunsmuir Viaducts, and [. . .] what opportunities might exist if they were to be removed.” Bring your lunch and join the conversation at 12:30 p.m. in room 1600.
SFU is offering a new course geared towards non-science students looking to fulfill their breadth requirements. The department of Molecular Biology and Biochemistry (MBB) has introduced a new breadth science course, BISC 111: Mutants and Monsters — Cell and Molecular Biology in Science Fiction, to the coming Fall semester. The syllabus aims to analyze and explain the scientific
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According to SFU professor and researcher Jonn Axsen, the future of electric vehicles and the key to their popularization is already here, but the lack of government support and promotion is limiting accessibility and sales. The 2015 Canadian PlugIn Electric Vehicle Study led by Axsen and his colleague Suzanne Goldberg, both professors in the School of Resource and Environmental Management (REM), analyzed the current influence on electric vehicles sales, and identified measures that could be taken to increase their popularity. They found not only that current electric vehicle availability and sales are extremely low, but that current methods of promotion are ineffective. “Electric vehicles are not likely to make up more than one percent of vehicle sales in the next decade and no more than four or five per cent by 2030,” explained Axsen in a SFU media release. However, Goldberg identified that improved government support and promotion has the
potential to increase sales to more than 20 per cent by 2030. The study split Canadian consumers into three groups: those who already possessed an electric vehicle as “PEV (plug-in electric vehicle) pioneers,” those who would buy a vehicle after the pioneers as “potential early mainstream buyers,” and those who would not buy a vehicle as “later mainstream buyers.” There are two main types of passenger electric vehicles examined in the study — plug-in electric vehicles and hybrid-electric vehicles. Plug-in electric vehicles are further divided by their use of gasoline. Vehicles that start by using electricity and use gasoline during latter parts of a trip are referred to as
plug-in hybrid vehicles (PHEVs), an example being the Chevrolet Volt. Plug-in vehicles that rely solely on electricty, in exchange for a reduced range of driving on a single charge, are referred to as battery electric vehicles (BEVs), with the Tesla Model S being the most famous. Hybrid-electric vehicles (HEVs) like the Toyota Prius hybrid have no plug-in charge available, but offer improved fuel economy and thus greenhouse gas (GHG) emission reductions. The study found that “mainstreamers” were generally confused about the different types of electric cars, and the very existence of plugin models in Canada. However, after being educated on the topic,
a third of the potential consumers expressed their desire to purchase a plug-in electric vehicle. Furthermore, two-thirds of mainstreamers already possess the capability to charge an electric vehicle in their homes, with a conventional wall socket within 50 feet of their vehicles. The study found that public chargers did not increase awareness for plug-in electric vehicles. According to Axsen, the lack of vehicle choice and the lack of public awareness of electric vehicles identified are problems identified by the study that can be eliminated with increased government support and promotion. Axen and Goldberg referred to California as a successful model, where they have the Zero Emissions Vehicle Mandate imposing a set percentage of vehicle production to be electric, as well as Norway, which already has a 20 per cent “new vehicle market share” for electric vehicles due to successful policies like a vehicle tax exemption. In BC, electric vehicles can reduce greenhouse gas emissions by 80 to 98 per cent in comparison to traditional gasoline-based passenger vehicles. With transportation accounting for nearly a third of British Columbia’s GHG emissions, an increase in use and awareness of electric vehicles could significantly decrease BC’s GHG emissions.
elements of science fiction, and to train students to recognize when a story becomes more far-fetched than based in science. The course designer and instructor Irina Kovalyova has been teaching in SFU’s MBB department for the past 12 years. Kovalyova considers herself a pioneer in this realm. She is a senior lecturer by day and a writer during her spare time. She told The Peak that she has always been interested in bringing the scientific and fantastical worlds together and she says it’s her mission to make this course convey science that is relevant to students’ daily lives. One challenge that Kovalyova foresees will be to make the science component of the course accessible and yet substantial. Students will be learning about cloning, bioterrorism,
epidemic outbreaks like Ebola, mutations, and DNA sequencing, among others. Students in the course will be reading H.G. Wells’ The Island of Dr. Moreau and Michael Crichton’s The Andromeda Strain , and submitting written responses to their readings along the way. Kovalyova explained that Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein did not make the reading list for this course because it did not have enough scientific substance to it. Kovalyova will be looking at each text and encouraging the students to differentiate between who is a ‘mutant’ and who is a ‘monster.’ She added, “Oftentimes, we are the monsters.” She will encourage her students to pick out scientific inconsistencies in all the texts. The course asks students to compose a short story as a
final project. The short science fiction story must be informed and scientifically plausible, as well as integrating some aspects of the course content.
Kovalyova hopes that by the end of the course, her students “will be able to distinguish between science fiction that is plausible and that which is not.”
6 NEWS
In a push to improve the organization’s accessibility, the Simon Fraser Student Society (SFSS) hosted an open forum for students to engage in accessibility dialogue. Held over two days, the sessions saw a handful of student participants who gathered to discuss issues and brainstorm solutions to help accommodate the needs of a diverse student body. SFU student Micaela Evans, who coordinated the event, was hired on by the society as the temporary Accessibility Project Worker. She will be working until the end of the month to put together a final report of her assessments and suggestions on how to address accessibility needs that are not being met. Items of discussion at the focus group included revising SFSS Food and Beverage Services (FBS) policies, creating spaces for students with disabilities in the new Student Union Building (SUB), ensuring that clubs and Departmental Student Unions (DSU) make
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accessibility considerations, and putting a scent-free policy in place. Conversations around the FBS addressed a need to better account for students with allergies and dietary restrictions. Participants shared their varied experiences and said that they have found it to be inconsistent. Evans said she will work on trying to firm up policy around this so it is not “changing all the time. I don’t think that’s very fair,” she added. They expressed a desire for venues dedicated to accommodating sensitivities, such as ‘nutfree,’ or entirely vegan restaurants. It was also suggested that SFSS food establishments keep a list of the ingredients that go into each of their items as well as possible cross-contamination information available to consumers upon request. The focus group saw the SUB as a place to create safe spaces for students with accessibility needs. Some suggestions included a space with low sensory stimulation — a “zen room” — for people to escape foods or scents to which they are allergic, as well as overstimulation from things like fluorescent lighting and excessive noise. It was also brought up that there is a lack of 24-hour safe space for those who do not identify as women. Evans remarked that Build SFU has expressed a willingness to dedicate space for disabled
students, given that students expressed a desire for it and that Students United for Disability Support (SUDS) could grow its membership. She commented that both SUDS and the SFSS Accessibility Fund Advisory Committee suffered from a lack of participation, saying that the committee does not meet regularly, only when specific items are brought to the table.
Aside from her final report, Evans is also compiling an event guide for clubs and DSUs that will help them make their events as inclusive as possible. She explained that while the SFSS can make suggestions, there is not a lot they can do yet to hold groups accountable for accessibility issues. Evans noted that the SFSS website also needs some work: “Websites need to be looked at from a dyslexic standpoint, from a screen reader standpoint.” She explained the challenges of ensuring that screen reader programs will recognize and voice all words on the page for the visually impaired,
KSA campaign to increase student voting for upcoming election [SURREY ] — The Kwantlen Student Association (KSA) is aiming to encourage students in their school to vote in the upcoming federal elections this October with a new campaign called Get Out the Vote. According to The Runner , “The KSA chose perhaps the most interesting Canadian election in recent memory to roll out this new program,” with the possibility for the opposition NDP party to win — making this election particularly historic. The KSA plans to get students involved by exposing them to debates and other politically-related events situated on their campus.
Queen’s professor’s papers removed due to plagiarism Stand with Nepal volunteers raise funds for victims of Nepal earthquake [KELOWNA] — UBCO students have started a program called Stand with Nepal, to lend help and support to victims that suffered from the recent earthquake. So far, the students have successfully raised $6,000, and are aiming to raise $10,000. The funds will be put towards initiatives in Nepal to rebuild and restore the homes of the earthquake’s victims. With files from The Phoenix News
With files from The Runner
also mentioning that it could prove difficult for students who struggle with dyslexia. Much of the discussion centred around students’ experiences with SFU’s academic protocol and the physical layout of the campus. Students expressed a desire for professors to keep accessibility in mind when structuring their courses and suggested that the university provide optional education for faculty. One large concern was the challenges SFU poses for those with physical disabilities; It was also noted that there seems to be a lack of accessible pathways and safe zones for emergency drills. While the SFSS cannot directly effect changes such as these, Evans intends to share the data they have collected with the university and give voice to the participants’ suggestions to the administration. To conclude, Evans remarked upon the difference between ‘equality’ and ‘equity.’ She explained that equality is about everyone having the same tools, while “equity should be more important, because that means that everyone is on the same playing field.”
[KINGSTON] — Four academic papers written by a Queen’s University professor were removed from the website of the CDIO Initiative, a Swedish educational organization which focuses on engineering, and consists of over 120 academic institutions globally. The papers were removed after the university advised CDIO to do so, due to elements of “plagiarism.” Despite the incident, the professor in question hasn’t made any statements concering the papers. With files from The Queen’s Journal
The SFSS board of directors unanimously passed a motion in favour of doubling the funds allocated from the Build SFU levy to SFU Financial Aid and Awards from three to six per cent. The funds are to be distributed through the Build SFU Undergraduate Student Bursary, which was established for “students who demonstrate financial distress to apply for assistance in paying the Build SFU levy.”
VP Student Services Darwin Binesh presented a motion for the SFSS to contribute towards compensation for the volunteer position of “Project Coordinator” of the Hi-F.I.V.E. (Friendship, Invite conversation, Value everyone’s gift, Eliminate stigma) Movement for Mental Health. Hi-F.I.V.E. is studentrun initiative currently supported by the SFSS and Health and Counselling Services, who will be co-funding the stipend. The board moved to allocate $3,300 for the position, which will pay $300 biweekly for 44 weeks between August 2015 and May 2016.
VP University Relations Brady Yano announced that the Burnaby campus’ WAC Bennett library will be open 24 hours for the first time during the summer semester exam period. Beginning Friday, August 7 until the end of the exam period, students will be able to access the facilities at any time, with a student ID required after regular hours upon entrance.
OPINIONS
Tamara Connor Peak Associate Recently, I have taken no pleasure in telling people that I am an SFU student. The source of my newfound shame stems entirely from the university’s union busting and poor labour relations with the Teaching Support Staff Union (TSSU). In April 2014, the collective agreement between the TSSU and the university expired. Considering SFU prides itself on becoming Canada’s leading “engaged university,” I had no reason to believe that negotiations would be delayed and that the union would have to wait so long without an agreement. Sadly, negotiations were, and the union is still waiting. For over a year now, the university has dismissed the union and their core issues. It’s extraordinarily hypocritical to ask students to “engage” in research, their community, and real issues when the university continuously neglects the needs of union employees by ignoring their pleas, and withholding a contract from them. Simon Fraser University, the school I have cheered for and called my own, now leaves me feeling ashamed. Andrew Petter, our current president, served as Minister of Advanced Education from 1998 to
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2000 here in BC. During that time, he provided leadership and direction to post-secondary institutions, but that experience has yet to be put to use at SFU, since he seems to have been MIA amid this 15 month-long conflict between the university and the union. Our president should know better than anyone else that SFU students are bright and attentive, and that they would notice if he shied away from a leadership role in the current conflict. So Mr. Petter, this message is for you: I want you to know that as an SFU student, I’ve noticed. I’ve noticed you’ve let SFU slip in its rank as a reputable institution. I’ve noticed you don’t respect unions and the bargaining process, and that you haven’t engaged with the TSSU to provide the leadership all presidents should when their employees are unhappy and their students inconvenienced.
The TSSU, which does the majority of face-time teaching, deserves a fair and timely negotiation process. As TSSU chair Derek Sahota says, the negotiation team representing the university is from an administrative background, and they don’t understand the problems faced by TAs and sessional instructors in the classrooms and lecture halls, dismissing them as not being real ‘issues.’
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If job security, protection from underpay and overwork, expanding opportunities for current Grad students, and guaranteeing union members the basic protections of BC law for health and safety training and wage payment aren’t considered ‘issues’ or don’t merit more conversation, then I don’t know what does. Simply put, the university appears to have no real grasp on the core issues the TSSU members have. This is likely the root of many problems in the negotiation room. When I graduated high school I didn’t just want to earn a degree — I wanted to experience higher learning and attend an institution committed to thoughtful debate, progressive policy, and fostering a community on campus. It was these desires that brought me to SFU in 2012. Now, I wonder if I made a mistake when I assessed how committed SFU was to ensuring such ideals. The recent bargaining between the university and the union g i ve s me hope for an agreement, but I still see no end in SFU’s blatant disrespect of labour organizations such as the TSSU. I worry about SFU students, as the strike affects them just as much as it does our hardworking TAs and sessional instructors. I am truly ashamed my university has had such poor relations with the union, and has continued to display a distinct lack of empathy for everyone affected.
Adam Van der Zwan opinions@the-peak.ca
Australian actress Caitlin Stasey recently released images of a conversation she had with a popular magazine’s editor who had refused to feature her when she turned down a nude photoshoot. According to Stasey, the editor of Good Weekend magazine assumed that because Stasey had appeared nude online before, she would automatically be willing to appear that way once again, without asking her. Stasey co-created and administers the online community at herself.com, a space where women share their stories regarding their sexuality and feminist views, while appearing semi or fully nude in a completely non-sexualized manner. Those featured on the website come from across the globe, with varying body shapes, views, and sexualities. She herself appeared in the first interview on the website, speaking on topics ranging from her prochoice beliefs, polyamory, and her views on femininity and feminism. Baring her entire body, she took the power back from the over-sexualized media she had grown accustomed to as an actress. In her own interview on herself.com, Stasey describes women within her terms: “a group of people of varying sexualities, ethnicities, body parts, and mentalities forging ahead despite the push back of centuries of oppression. Women are fucking durable and powerful.”
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When approached by Good Weekend to do a feature about her recently launched website, Stasey enthusiastically agreed. However, she asked them to change the photo shoot when she realized that they had mistakenly assumed she would pose nude. Though nudity is the basis of her website, it is not to sell magazines. No profit is made from women sharing their stories and bodies on their own terms, and she did not agree to be sexualized for profit. Upon hearing Stasey wouldn’t do the shoot as they had assumed, they came up with excuses to postpone it, and eventually cancelled it completely. It was clear to Stasey the reasoning behind it, despite the editor denying that this is why the story was cancelled. The editor made the assumption regarding consent that many do — that if a woman says “yes” once, she is expected to in all other situations. Consent is a global issue, no matter the situation or the culture. It knows no bounds, and crosses all boundaries of decency. The issue of consent is everpresent within our hyper-sexualized media, the very same thing the website is trying to combat by showing non-sexualized bodies that do not exist solely for the misogynistic male gaze. The idea of women bearing all online has become ingrained within our society, often for the wrong reasons. Sexuality is a common currency within the media, and consent is rarely considered to be appealing or empowering. With sites like herself.com and people like Caitlin Stasey, women are finally getting the chance to choose for themselves how their bodies are being viewed, solely on their own terms.
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OPINIONS
With the ever-steady rise in gas prices, driving my car from Coquitlam to Vancouver is costing more and more every day. As an individual looking for an alternative, the fabled electric cars caught my eye. Now here’s something that wouldn’t break the bank to fuel! Despite optimistic research, a lighter strain on the wallet, and a removal of many harmful gas emissions, plug-in vehicles remain a rare sight. SFU environmental researcher John Axsen has concluded that over one-third of Canadian buyers want an electric vehicle, but less than one per cent of vehicle sales in Canada are electric due to “low consumer awareness and limited vehicle choice.” Axsen hopes that if policymakers and politicians notice the studies, plug-in vehicles may be introduced to the Canadian market. And this makes sense! Considering the buzz that surrounds climate change and protecting the environment, using this clean source of energy would fit into the most hippie of standards. However, there aren’t a lot of electric cars on the road, and companies seem hesitant to devote more than a hybrid-type vehicle to the pursuit of a cleaner drive. Why is this so? My tinfoil hat-guess
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Plug-in cars would change the way we view our handling of the environment. would be that big oil companies are pushing against the electric car movement. It would make sense. If electric cars became the norm, oil tycoons would lose out on serious revenue. If general consumers and public figures were willing to talk about the benefits of electric cars and drum up support behind them, companies would look to the potential serious money they could make. Not only would clean energy become prevalent with land transportation, it would be lighter on consumer wallets as well. Instead of outsourcing our fossil fuels only to have them sold back to us for ridiculous sums of money, we would be able to produce our own electricity and skip the tycoon entirely. More money that is saved on transportation would mean more money to spend on other things, which would also mean more money could be injected into the local Canadian economy. This would presumably result
in significantly lowered greenhouse gas emissions for those who care about the planet, and lowered prices for those who want to save on daily gas money. It’s a win-win. As the Canadian environmental activist David Suzuki said, “some argue we should get coal, oil and gas out of the ground as quickly as possible, build more pipelines and make as much money as we can selling it here and abroad. Their priorities are the economy and meeting short-term energy needs so we can live the lives to which we’ve become accustomed.” With electric cars, we will be able to help the economy and continue our lifestyles, while accidentally helping the environment as well. So bring on the electric cars. While the initial problem is a lack of charging stations, that can be easily solved with the increased demand. I, for one, welcome our new electronic overlords.
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The deadline for applications for expansion NHL franchises was Monday, July 20, and the two cities that have submitted a bid are Las Vegas led by business man Bill Foley and Quebec City led by media conglomerate Quebecor. The NHL will do their due diligence and look at the feasibility of both markets, but it is safe to say that both cities were not the first choices for the NHL. Las Vegas and Quebec City rank 45th and 59th respectively in TV audiences, well behind rumoured expansion spots Toronto (for a second NHL team) and Seattle.
Quebec City could work as a site for an NHL franchise simply because they are in Canada. A team’s triumphant return to the city would generate tons of ticket and merchandise sales, but there would be some challenges as well. For example, the French language may be a hindrance in terms of recruiting free agents and keeping star players, as shown by Eric Lindros when he refused to play for the team. As well, the Canadian dollar will have a large say
in how viable the team can be. All NHL players’ salaries are paid in US dollars; with our dollar hovering around 77 cents, with the potential of going even lower than that, it would be difficult for small market Canadian franchises such as Quebec City to field a competitive team. Las Vegas would be an even tougher market for the NHL to break into. As a nontraditional hockey market, it will be hard for the NHL to garner a fan base compared to other leagues such as the NFL or NBA. There is also the question of local TV broadcasting rights. While Quebec City can package TV deals in both English and French, Las Vegas will more likely than not struggle with making a serious amount on local TV rights. Sports also fall low on the totem pole in Las Vegas. As anyone who has been to Vegas can tell you, the multitude of casinos and nightclubs constitute the main entertainment in the city. The NHL would be competing against this, and it’s a battle I do not think they can win. Expansion is a high-risk move by the NHL. They are probably better off moving struggling franchises such as Arizona, Florida, and Carolina to more receptive hockey markets. The main reason for this push for expansion is most likely the supposed $500 million the NHL wants for each of these expansion franchises, which goes directly into the owner’s pockets. All in all, though, Quebec City would be much better off than Las Vegas.
OPINIONS
Dear The Peak, I am incredibly appreciative of the coverage you have provided regarding the Student Union Building (SUB). There is no denial that the SFU student community has expressed growing concerns, such as campus life improvement and increasing both active and study spaces. As an elected board member dedicated to health and student wellbeing, I can confidently affirm Build SFU is an important response to what students want and need. As a result, I commend all student leaders for their dedicated efforts in increasing student life interaction on campus. At the same time, I sympathize with my fellow
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students in their timid efforts to become more involved or unsuccessful attempts to find space to study, relax or socialize in. [. . .]Structural features, such as the potential SUB, will enhance student involvement and establish a comfortable and welcoming environment for all my peers, including those who are involved, wished to be involved, or [are] indifferent but still [wish] to reap the benefits of the SUB. Additionally, I am proud to be part of the process that has involved input from over 22,800 students and the extent of consultation, both extensive and ongoing. Through these discussions, we continue to
accommodate to concerns such as accessibility, sustainability, engagement and student wellbeing. The resulting SUB will be highly environmentally friendly, healthy and sustainable. [For example, it provides] daylight, encouraging both structural and relational ways to bright [sic] your day. Build SFU SUB is a building for students, by students, and it will finally give us the resources we need to improve student life on campus.
Sincerely,
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Outer space and extraterrestrial life have always fascinated me. I contemplate civilization through the course of human history — our barbarisms, thoughts and choices, values and ideals, our survival mechanisms — and I’m always struck with probably the most simplistic but profound realization: we exist. We’re here, and this is all happening. So, if life can tangibly inhabit this planet with billions of years of actions, motivations, achievements, and failures, why can’t life exist elsewhere in our universe? I guess there is a possibility that we could be alone — a solitary spinning ball of matter in a seemingly endless space of nothing, with a
dizzying seven billion microscopic organisms, manipulating their personal spaces and affecting others with their life’s decisions — but I don’t buy it. If it happened here, it can happen anywhere else. The question is where? What kind of civilizations are out there? Are they more or less advanced than us? What do their planets look like? What could we learn from them? What could they learn from us? I’m frustrated that we don’t have answers, and that we might never have them. But we can dare to dream, and bask in the excitement of these amazing possibilities.
That being said, let’s face it. Mother nature, you fucked up. You made us selfish, aggressive beings who formed a history moulded with shameless and brutish slaughter. You introduced disease, war and strife, and confined our biology to this ever-shrinking planet so that one day we would reproduce to a population so large that we’ll eventually kill ourselves off, if the products of our ‘intelligence’ don’t do it first. Spawned from you are truly pointless things like Internet trends, celebrity gossip, belly buttons and appendixes, the re-boot of National Lampoon’s Vacation, fish porn, commercially sold pet rocks, and shoe umbrellas.
You introduced money, fame, love, politics — things that warmly cuddle us with their assurance, yet can rip us to shreds, Hulk-style. We’re left with the unfair challenge the of having to navigate ourselves through this turmoil of everything that exists, and still survive with as much face as we can. Sure, there are endless things to be thankful for and content with, but in the end I’m left wondering whether it could have all been different, or if this was always how it was going to be. Life on earth can suck, but we just gotta deal with it until some alien race swipes us off our feet!
Larissa Chen Health Science Representative, SFSS Board of Directors
— SteveZB
“Have you heard of that vending machine in the [unintelligible] room? If you press [one button with another], beer comes out.” “Me and my brother got our hunting licences last summer, so I thought it might be nice to go and get a gun.”
— I’m NOTHERE
“I’m going to name my first child Meriadoc Took.” “I’m just a constant slew of wonderful quotes, you should really be taking notes on everything I say.”
Last week The Peak published in “Twitch is a revolution in hardcore gaming” that the company Amazon created the online platform Twitch. Amazon actually acquired it from the original creators.
“Wait, so if people can eat anything, does that mean they can eat poo?”
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ARTS
As our university approaches its 50th anniversary celebration on September 9th, The Peak caught up with the emcee of the evening, Christopher Gaze, founder and artistic director of the Bard on the Beach Shakespeare Festival. “Nothing gives me more pleasure than people having a good time,” he says, in anticipation of the event. Gaze received an honorary doctorate in Fine Arts in October 2006, and, as he recalls, “it was the most extraordinary moment of my life when the president called me and told me that I was going to receive the honorary degree. [. . .] I have everything to be grateful for SFU to honour me in that way.” Having hosted hundreds of events including concerts for the
August 4, 2015
Vancouver Symphony and their popular Tea & Trumpets series, Christopher Gaze considers himself highly experienced in being able to link things together, especially at events that could end up not particularly lively or fun. He wants to use his humour and fun to make sure people are happy at any event he hosts. Gaze’s many honours include Canada’s Meritorious Service Medal (2004), Honorary
Enjoy patio season
The end of summer is fast approaching, and my feelings on this transition can only be described as bittersweet. Frankly, I’m a colder weather kind of gal and I’m happy to welcome fall after the relentless reign of the hot sun. That being said, there are many wonderful things that can only be fully appreciated in the summer. I challenge you to take up all of these great summer activities, before it’s too late.
arts editor email
Yes! I get so excited about this one. Patio season should be treasured and excessively taken advantage of in the summer — I mean, what could possibly be better than lounging around in a sundress, shaded in a sundried city, drinking pitchers of sangria? That’s right, pretty much nothing beats the lazy, weird conversations you have with your friends on those patios. Our picks: The Hub Vancouver Art Gallery Cafe Kitchen on Main
Get outdoors
I know this isn’t everyone’s ‘thing,’ but I believe everyone should still try to enjoy the great
Tessa Perkins arts@the-peak.ca
Doctorates from UBC (2008) and SFU (2006), the Mayor’s Arts Award for Theatre (2011), and the Order of British Columbia (2012). Being at the helm of Bard on the Beach for 26 years (and counting), Gaze feels comfortable in front of crowds. Public speaking does not scare him, he says, as he welcomes the Bard audiences night after night before each show. Gaze is grateful to have learnt good graces and manners from
his family, which he deems as a valuable asset in guiding an evening of introducing, welcoming, thanking, and recognising various people. He does all this with humour and a lot of heart. “Being an emcee is sort of like being in a certain league of allrounders, and I like to always do my best,” he said. When asked what attendees of the SFU 50th anniversary celebration can expect from him,
outdoors. Nature is awesome, and we should not only appreciate it, but actively embrace it. The water and food you need, your home, your air, all depend on our outdoor environment, and summer makes it look really Instagram-worthy. Venture outdoors for some fresh air and a fresh perspective. Whether you prefer camping with your crew or lounging on the beach, there is something for everyone out there. Embrace the adrenaline and the outdoors while the weather is still beautiful.
Celebrate life
Our picks: Ziplining in Queen Elizabeth Park Bungee jumping in Whistler Tandem biking along the seawall
Everybody wants to party and get together in the summer. Something about the weather not being grungy and gross makes people more interactive and sunshiny. Vancouver has an incredible lineup of music, food, and cultural festivals, especially in the summer. They are scattered abundantly throughout the city like confetti, so make sure you attend one of these parties for everyone. Whether you want to eat your heart out or soak up some culture, there is something special and fun for everyone. Good company, good food, and good entertainment are the ingredients of pretty amazing memories, and it’s important to remember that there never has to be a reason to celebrate life.
Gaze promised, “conviviality, fun, clear direction, and I will provide all that I can in celebratory remarks and joy in accomplishment of SFU over 50 years and looking forward to the next 50 years.” And he assured that he can entertain: “I have managed to convince a lot of people over a lot of years that I can inject humour, lightness, perhaps a bit of profundity when required, and maybe the odd anecdote which amuses.” Gaze subscribes to Noel Coward’s notion of joy, which says “if all I have is a talent to amuse, then that is all right.” He hopes to keep the evening joined together in an elegant fashion to celebrate SFU, saying “It is marvellous what SFU has accomplished, clearly delineating their brand of university, reaching great heights of intellectual capacity and exploration. It is really remarkable how they have achieved that over 50 years in its unique location. It is something to celebrate and recognise and where people should want to come to achieve great things. “That’s what SFU is — a very grassroots and imaginative university.”
Our picks: Food Truck Festival (every Sunday) Bard on the Beach (until September 26) Outdoor movies in Stanley Park (every Tuesday) The most popular season is slipping away from us, and we need to squeeze out every last bit of warmth and sunshine before the Vancouver downpour begins. No matter how busy you are with school or work, everyone needs a summer vacation! Whether it’s two weeks or two days, in Honolulu or in Vancouver, take time to appreciate and bid a proper farewell to summer 2015.
ARTS
August 4, 2015
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COMIC CONNOISSEUR
Horror is the hardest genre to sucessfully create. The hallmark of any enjoyable horror romp rests in its characters, its story, and of course, the amount of fear it can instill in its audience. Striking the right balance between all three is much more difficult than people tend to think. More often than not, we see two out of three qualities attained, with one elusively vacant. As such, most contributions to the genre are forgettable and lackluster. The truth is, one hardly hears of any unanimous critical acclaim for horror stories. As much as I am resistant to being scared to the extent of a bowel movement, even I can attest that horror is a cerebral art form that is difficult to design for a widespread audience. However, with the emergence of Image’s new horror thriller Nailbiter, critical reception might still very well be possible.
A dark mystery hangs over the town of Buckaroo, Oregon. While most towns are known for their distinctive locales or foodstuffs, this one has the distinction of bringing to life 16 serial killers, each one more terrifying than the last. The story follows a suspended Army Intelligence Officer, Nicholas Finch, who is invited to Buckaroo to aid an FBI profiler, Eliot Carroll, in the investigation of the macabre town. Upon Finch’s arrival, Carroll goes missing. Finch proceeds to track down the leading suspect to his colleague’s disappearance: acquitted serial killer Edward Warren, a.k.a. The Nailbiter. As Finch searches for his lost friend, he finds himself coming closer to the truth behind the Buckaroo Serial Killers — a truth some will kill to keep undiscovered. Nicholas Finch is an overly aggressive lead who entertains audiences with his unpredictability. With the reasons for his suspension alluded to only in passing, Finch is just as interesting a character to delve into as the mystery of Buckaroo itself. Edward Warren serves as a spiritual analogue to Hannibal Lecter, albeit more charmingly sarcastic than cultured and cannibalistic. Among the leads are an array of supporting characters with their own personal agendas and endgames;
these secondary characters aid in providing the plot with twists and turns to make every page engaging. The artwork of Nailbiter is a grisly array of ominous scenery and blood-soaked violence. Mike Henderson renders scenes that would be hair-raising for even Freddy Krueger himself. Scenes of Edward Warren biting nails are among just some of the more ghastly sights to behold in this story and are enough to make readers grips their nails protectively while reading. One of the charming aspects of Nailbiter lies in its darkly humorous references to Silence of the Lambs. At times, Nailbiter treads familiar story beats as a classic thriller, but instead of distancing itself, it admits to its similarities with tongue-in-cheek, often synchronous breaks between horrific brutalities. I am often hesitant to brand a story with the label of being a very original work. However, Nailbiter is story which earns this distinction. It is an accessible story to both casual and uninitiated scream queens and gore lords. It pays homage to other works, but never to the extent that it sacrifices its own uniqueness. Contrary to its title and gruesome visuals, Nailbiter is a delectable work that will leave you hungry for more.
On August 5th, a brighter side of African culture will emerge from behind tears of laughter at AFRIKOMEDI. No, it’s not just a charming play on words, but a student-funded evening that will feature the wit of five talented local comedians. Headlining the event are two comics who focus on a variety of issues including race, student life experiences, and social boundaries. First to headline the event is Vancouver native Ryan Mutama, a comedian who tackles the awkwardly avoided questions regarding African American culture. Mutama is followed by Gavin Matts, a graduate of film production at VFS and a regular at the Comedy Mix downtown. Matts has also performed at the 2014 Pemberton Music Festival. The show is also a platform for encouraging young standup comics, and will feature
several comedy acts performed by SFU students: Virginia Ukpabi, Benjamin Manishimwe, and Mufaro Mbudzi. The Peak caught up with AFRIKOMEDI host Ally Baharoon to ask what audiences could expect from the jovial evening. “You get to learn more about Africa in a way that isn’t really widely understood,” he said. “We don’t have talking lions as pets, Ebola is not a major town [. . .] the point of comedy is to push comfort zones and boundaries.” For those of you who feel like outsiders to the world of African culture, asking questions about the subject can feel awkward, thus they are avoided altogether. If that is the case, this show is right up your alley. You can leave all of your worries and awkward feelings at the door. It’s not very often that comedy events are hosted at SFU. There are trivia nights and workshops galore, yet very few comedic acts; take this chance to catch one before the long wait for the next one.
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delightful film that is fun and exciting, but also poignant and raw. Me and Earl and The Dying Girl has the potential to feel self-indulgent and manipulative but, to his credit, Gomez-Rejon’s film is as technically dazzling as it is emotionally devastating. But it’s just a movie about teenagers — it’s not a historical drama, biopic, or movie about movies. Good luck, Gomez-Rejon!
The summer movie season is nearing an end and the Academy Awards will never recognize any of my picks, so I’ve decided to assemble an Oscar ballot for the first two thirds of the year, before the awards season hopefuls are released from September–December. The politics behind the group that has the ability to deem something “The Best Picture” skew their ability to look at the entire year objectively, as they often ignore films for ridiculous reasons. Academy Award voters, feel free to plagiarize this ballot.
Best Picture: About Elly Asghar Farhadi’s A Separation won the Best Foreign Language Film Oscar in 2011, but About Elly , which was actually made in 2009 and never received a theatrical release, might be his masterpiece. With the tension of a Hitchcockian mystery that slowly unfolds, About Elly emerges as a striking character study and a political critique of the sexism in Iranian culture. But this will never win, because apparently the “best picture” has to be American every single year.
Best Director: Alfonso Gomez-Rejon: Me And Earl And The Dying Girl The acting, cinematography, and storytelling had the potential to be unwieldy and annoying, but with contrasts through dynamic and static camerawork, Alfonso Gomez-Rejon has made a
Songs like “Lottery,” “I Know What I Want,” and “Riding Round” are relaxing but not boring. They have killer grooves that make you want to grab your best buds, gather around a fire, dance, trade jokes, and laugh. On the flip side, songs like “Call Me,” “Melting,” and “Loner” have the ability to slow time down and make you enjoy the little things in life.
#5 The O’My’s A Humble Masterpiece
#3 Tyler, The Creator Wolf
Best Actor: Paul Giamatti: Love & Mercy Love & Mercy , the experimentally structured biopic on Beach Boys frontman Brian Wilson, is a heavy-hitting film anchored by John Cusack and Paul Dano’s shared portrayal of the music icon. But without Paul Giamatti’s nightmare-inducing performance as Dr. Eugene Landy, the film’s emotional pull wouldn’t be anchored by any real threat. The longtime character actor holds our attention every time he’s on screen. We feel him slowly boil up with small changes in his diction and expression, but when he freaks out, he is as scary a threat as Jason or Freddy. Giamatti will give you nightmares, but the Academy won’t remember him by morning, let alone next February.
Best Actress: Sarah Snook: Predestination Playing both the male and female parts of the same character, Sarah Snook’s layered performance in the heartbreaking Predestination , a time-travel romp about identity, masterfully captures different mannerisms, gaits, and diction, done while Snook seamlessly plays two different genders. As Snook was unknown to me, I just assumed that the two genders were played by two actors, but such is the greatness of her performance. She is that character. But she is that character in an indie sci-fi time travel movie, so we’ll have to forget about her, too.
Perhaps one of the most enjoyable listens to be released in recent years, Chance the Rapper’s Acid Rap is a genre redefining body of work that is as upbeat as it is insightful. Songs such as “Pusha Man,” “Juice,” “Nana,” and “Smoke Again” are fantastic upbeat listens. These songs sound extraordinary in almost every situation whether it’s in a car full of friends, on your headphones, or at a house party. They can even make mundane chores like doing laundry fun. Just as the album started, it ends on a high note with “Everything’s Good (Good Ass Outro)” reassuring us that everything is good — however, in context of this body of work, everything’s great.
#1 Frank Ocean Channel Orange The O’My’s are an up-andcoming band from Chicago who seamlessly blend blues, jazz, soul, and rock together to produce an eargasmically organic sound. Their latest offering, A Humble Masterpiece, compliments summer days and nights flawlessly. Songs such as “Feeling Like a King” and “Promise Land” give off the smooth and carefree energy that you get when you’re driving around town with the windows down with a beautiful girl in your passenger seat, making you wish that you were able to make time freeze.
#4 Kali Uchis Por Vida
The absolute perfect album to accentuate your summer bike rides is Wolf . Sonically, Wolf seamlessly blends elements of jazz and hip-hop together in a way that is unique to Tyler. Just like any bike ride, Wolf has its moments of explosiveness and its moments of calmness. Songs like “Jamba,” “Domo23,” and “Tamale” erupt from out of your headphones and give you a rush of adrenaline similar to cruising down a steep hill, while tracks like “Wolf,” “Answer,” and “Cowboy” emit a cadence of calmness, similar to a nice forest trail along a river. Wolf is not a lyrically driven album, nor is it meant to be. It’s a hodgepodge of emotions and feelings, conveyed through the music as a whole. When Tyler breaks the struggle of love down to nine syllables, with “I fucking hate you, but I love you,” the song brilliantly conveys what every one of us has felt in some point in our lives.
#2 Chance the Rapper — Acid Rap This Virginia native with Columbian roots provides smooth R&B music that goes with summer evenings just as well as strawberry ice cream. On Por Vida , instrumentals provided by talented producers such as Kaytranada, BADBADNOTGOOD, and Tyler, The Creator help Kali give off a vibe of innocent rebelliousness.
Frank Ocean comes in at the top of this list by providing us one of the most critically acclaimed albums of the decade, Channel Orange. Channel Orange has many themes, the most prominent being love and uncompromising honesty. The album starts with a brief track where we hear various sound effects, the most recognizable being a Playstation 2, which immediately helps cement the tone of an awkward calmness which is present throughout the album. Songs such as “Thinking Bout You,” “Fertilizer,” and “Sweet Life” have an airy, feel-good aesthetic. There are two climaxes to Channel Orange: first, a nearly 10-minute-long track, “Pyramids,” which sees Ocean bob and weave through several melodies, harmonies, bass lines, and horn section; second, “Bad Religion,” which describes the agony of being hopelessly in love with someone who will never love you. Channel Orange will forever be my go-to summer album.
ARTS
August 4, 2015
After reading Mel Hurtig’s mythshattering The Truth About Canada, I knew I had to get my hands on a copy of his latest work, The Arrogant Autocrat. Much like his previous book, this is a criticism of corporate takeover, foreign ownership deals, and changes to our social programs, but this time it is focused on the man who is leading the charge to transform Canada into an unrecognizable place — Stephen Harper. Harper’s determination to remake Canada based on his own values and priorities is outlined in this short, shocking look at what he has done so far to radically alter the democratic, social, and economic fabric of the country. His support and promotion of oil companies and the tar sands
has damaged not only our environment, but also our international reputation. While many Canadians would fashion themselves as peaceful, democratic people who support social programs and fairness, Harper’s agenda is contrary to this image and is gradually being implemented without our knowledge. Much of what is written about our unfair democratic system,
environmental policies, and Harper’s disdain for science was not new to me, but there were some shocking facts and figures that Hurtig revealed which made me shudder. The most important part of this book is the section about the economy, something the Harper government loves to talk about. The section is split into two chapters to include all the details about how
our economy isn’t doing as well as they claim and the way things are skewed. The second chapter, subtitled “Federal Deficit Voodoo,” contains three pages of facts showing how our economy has worsened under Harper’s leadership. With short chapters and succinct writing, Hurtig summarizes all the reasons that Harper is not our hero. SFU Adjunct Professor in Communications Donald Gutstein has also written an eye-opening book that demonstrates the way Harper, with the help of neoliberal think tanks and colleagues, is systematically transforming Canada to suit his ideological vision. Harperism shows how Harper is pushing his agenda in the vein of other neoliberal leaders, such as Margaret Thatcher and Ronald Reagan. The term Harperism is used to label this ideology that encourages a weakened labour movement (ideally the disappearance of unions), reduced government scientific research and data collection, and lower taxes. The overall idea is that the role of the government is only to support the economy, not to provide services and to intervene in public life as little as possible.
The Acorn and Luke’s General Store are collaborating to introduce the most exquisite vegan/vegetarian brunch in Metro Vancouver. The Acorn restaurant on Main Street at 24th, highly reputable among food critics, is proudly and successfully serving my favourite meal of the day in fresh, local style. The restaurant draws you in with their modest but eye-catching sign, and makes you stay with their genuine service and stellar ambiance boasting a modern, elegant scene with staple plants and decor
pieces that add a rustic and downto-earth touch. Picture wooden tables, but polished and sleek, with all the decor, unique and eye-catching, while seamlessly organized and clean cut. This incredible balance creates a perfect setting that’s appropriate for any brunch occasion, whether it’s your grandma’s birthday or the kickoff to a day out with the girls. The best part is of course the food and drink. Luke’s cold brew provides a sharp and sophisticated taste that compliments the rich brunch dishes. Having selected artichoke from the menu, I was pleasantly surprised. The southern fried artichokes were served alongside vegan house waffles, bourbon maple syrup, pickled shallots, and mushroom red eye gravy. The portions are just right — enough to fill you up, but not so much that you will leave half of it hastily discarded on the plate.
The dish was made into an appealing work of art with the garnish of pickled onions and edible bachelor buttons grown in a nearby garden and placed just so. It’s the kind of thing that is too pretty to eat, but irresistable to not. The Four Barrel Roasters brewed coffee is one a coffee-lover can truly appreciate: a smooth roast with tasteful notes that don’t make you cringe at the acidity. It’s perfect for when you are finished your delicious meal sooner than you expected, and want to linger a while. Almost everything on The Acorn’s menu is gluten free or vegan, and the items that are not have that option available. You will not find a single dish presented here at any other restaurant. They take the base of classic meals and turn them into unique concoctions that can’t be mimicked or compared. My favorite thing about the restaurant, though, would have to be
their devotion to supporting local markets and farms. They credit them on the menu and make great efforts to establish a connection between the farm and the table. This is shown in their Beggars Banquet at brunch and Harvest Meal at dinner which are composed of seasonal ingredients harvested that very day
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Stemming from neoliberal economic theories first popularized by the Austrian economist Friedrich von Hayek and his associates, these are the same ideals that inspired Thatcherism and Reaganism, but Gutstein argues that Harper has taken his neoliberalism further in many areas. I was fascinated to learn about the underlying ideological basis for many of Harper’s strategies, and disgusted to see how successfully he has been able to implement many changes without question. Harper’s level of success has not been accidental. Gutstein expertly shows the links between the politicians, think tanks, journalists, academics, and researchers who have collectively promoted these neoliberal ideas so far that they have almost become common public consensus. These links are not surprising, but realizing just how many and how effective they are was astounding. The view of the market economy as all important above democracy, freedom, the environment, and general quality of life is not something I’m interested in seeing as our country’s political agenda, and I hope that this information can be taken into account as we prepare for an election this fall.
and served on the table within a couple of hours. Brunch at The Acorn is nothing short of a beautiful and pleasant experience with friendly staff, an incomparable menu, and a delightful ambiance that will surely end with being enticed to visit again and again.
August 4, 2015
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COMMUNITY PHOTOS August 4, 2015
photo editor Phoebe Lim email photos@the-peak.ca
DIVERSIONS / ETC
Across 1. Masts 6. Fret 10. Stench 14. UFO pilot 15. Ocean current 16. Simple 17. Pierced 19. Pub brews 20. Speak 21. Showed again 22. Trunk 23. Howard ____ of radio 24. Boast 25. In danger (2 wds.) 28. Words of understanding (2 wds.) 30. Honest ____ Lincoln 33. “Moonstruck” actress 34. Hurts 35. Brewed drink 36. Matured 39. Involves 41. Compass reading (abbr.) 42. Oscar, e.g. 44. Distribute
45. Tennis term 46. Disney fish 47. Panoramas 49. Charged atoms 51. Forbidden items (hyph.) 53. Fittingly 55. Toil 56. Had a meal 59. Grating 60. Engaged in festivities 62. Roof edge 63. Actor ____ Griffith 64. Amid 65. Tinter 66. Profit and ____ 67. Expire Down 1. Undermines 2. Guilty, e.g.
3. Breezy 4. TKO caller 5. Nasal sounds 6. Drummer Ringo ____ 7. Ill-fated ship 8. Genesis locale 9. Join together 10. ____ Beach (D-Day site) 11. Group of representatives 12. Sources of metal 13. Repose 18. Smell strongly 22. Wave top 23. King’s title 24. Has-____ 25. Land units 26. Old pronoun 27. Monotonous 29. Lose fur
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31. Southern beauty 32. Soothes 34. Eden dweller 37. Baby tender 38. Female sheep 40. Fruit drinks 43. Reagan and McDonald 47. Uppity one 48. Ranch enclosure 50. More mature 52. Minds 53. Mellowed 54. Beseech 55. Carson’s successor 56. On 57. Perfect scores 58. Outer limit 60. Baseball’s ____ Ripken 61. Med. group
EVENT LISTINGS ARE FREE FOR SFU STUDENTS AND STUDENT ORGANIZATIONS. SEND THE DATE, TIME, LOCATION, NAME, AND A 15 WORD DESCRIPTION TO CLASSIFIEDS@THE-PEAK.CA
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HUMOUR
August 4, 2015
humour editor email
Jacey Gibb humour@the-peak.ca
HUMOUR
“Here’s what we can do,” Stacey McLachlan looks to her cointerviewee, “we can just do every other word when answering his questions.” Colin Sharp, my other interview subject, takes the idea and runs with it: “this.” “Is.” “Going.” “. . . Badly.” The jocular interplay between Sharp and McLachlan makes for a difficult translation to print, but in-person the pair riff off of each other like they’ve been doing it for years. Their chemistry makes sense though, given their similarities and history together. Aside from a brief stint as roommates, the two are both involved with the Vancouver comedy scene, and both also bear the illustrious title of former Humour Editor for The Peak. I’m in good company. McLachlan and Sharp also share one more thing in common: they’re both co-hosting The Peak’s 50-year reunion on August 14. While the event is still several weeks away, I ask what the co-hosts have planned for the event. “The extent of my knowledge,” says Sharp, “and what I want us to do is me and Stacey and a few other notable Peak alumni who are in the comedy scene, just doing a fun set.” “Some goofing,” adds McLachlan. “Some goofing, some spoofing. I’m leaning more goof-heavy.” “Okay, you take goofs, I’ll take spoofs. It’s perfect.” The interview is hard to balance, because McLachlan and Sharp represent two fairly different entities. McLachlan was Humour Editor for two semesters back in 2008, and is currently an associate editor for Vancouver’s Western Living magazine; she’s been dabbling with stand-up comedy for just over six months now. On the other hand, Sharp held the Humour Editor position for three semesters back in 2011 and is now a copywriter at an advertising agency, Invoke Media; he’s also been doing comedy for four years now and is the co-curator of King’s Head Comedy, a weekly comedy show at King’s Head Pub that just celebrated it’s one-year anniversary. Both are Peak alumni, and both are very funny.
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Unsure of how to approach a two-person interview where both subjects lead such different lives, McLachlan and Sharp take charge and spend much of our time together asking questions back-andforth, some strictly humorous, others genuine. Read on to learn about how McLachlan is handling the shift from writing to performing, what role comedy plays in both of their lives, and why Sharp calls the thought of an ultimate goal in comedy, “gross.” Stacey McLachlan: Colin, how do you feel things have changed in your personal comedy stylings since you began this wonderful journey? Colin Sharp: The big difference is when you transition from saying things you think are funny into saying things that have some level of cohesion. I had a couple one-liners when I started that were objectively funny jokes, but who cares? They were just made up scenarios. My early stand-up was a real hodgepodge of trying things out and seeing what got a laugh. Now when I’m on stage, there are still little oneliners, but they’re framed within the context of something bigger. My jokes no longer start with me thinking, “Oh, that’s funny.” Instead, they start with, “I believe this.” That makes it sound like I’m getting political. I’m not. I mean, I have a sixminute bit about how stupid I think the Gastown steam clock is. It’s not political, it’s just an opinion I have. Stacey, you’re new to comedy, but you’ve been writing for a while. What do you feel about the shift between writing and performing? SM: One of the things I’m working on is cutting things back,
much more than I want to. I’m having a really hard time writing jokes and not writing them too ‘writer-ly.’ There’s a huge difference between someone reading something on a page and someone hearing something live. It’s been tough, but good. The hardest part is being concise. Like how right now, I’ve been going on and on and I could’ve said all this in a single sentence. CS: I’ll give you the one sentence that was passed onto me by 20-year pro Kevin Foxx, on the note of condensing your material: the setup is everything you need to know to understand the punchline and nothing more. If something doesn’t make the punchline funnier, get rid of it. Peak: During your reigns as Humour Editor, is there anything you wish you’d done but didn’t have the chance to do? CS: One thing I was bummed about not getting to do but then the next Humour Editor, Gary Lim, ran with it in a big way was Petter Watch. It was very inspired by The Onion’s coverage of Joe Biden, making him into this ridiculous character, and I thought we should do something like that for Petter. I wasn’t the Humour Editor anymore, but Gary was stoked on it and it ran for years. SM: I feel like I got the chance to do everything I wanted to. When I was running the Humour section, no one would submit anything ever, so every week it was just me deciding what I wanted to do. During the summer there were camps up on campus, so one of my favourite things that I did was get the kids to write their own comics
and then we critiqued them. Somebody’s arms would be at a weird angle, because they’re obviously children, and so we’d say comments like “How could they possibly be catching that ball?!” Or reinterpreting things like, “The artist is trying to make a discussion on the human nature of melancholy. It’s beautiful,” and it’s a picture of a dog or something. CS: I started running comics from a guy who does stand-up in town, Jacob Samuel. This isn’t me taking credit, because he’s the talented one, but it’s cool to think I ran comics from him and now he’s been published in the New Yorker three times. He used to just send me a bunch and I’d print my favourites. P: What would you say is comedy’s role in your life now? CS: My entire sense of selfworth. I work as a copywriter at an ad agency and my job is to be clever at a desk all day. It’s not always strictly speaking funny, but clever. Most advertising that’s not funny is just clever. SM: I don’t know if you get this a lot, Colin, but people always ask me “Why are you doing comedy? Why are you doing stand-up?” It’s such a weird question to ask, because you wouldn’t ask someone why their band is performing or why they’re playing a soccer game. Doing things in public is how people are validated for what they think they’re good at. It’s such a self-conscious question to answer: “Well, I want praise. I want people to praise me for something I think I’m good at.” That’s what I want. Did you get people asking you why you wanted to do comedy?
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CS: I didn’t get that one as much. I hate when things just go to stereotypes, but for women starting in comedy, you’ve probably heard praise from your friends before, but I bet it wasn’t super common for you to meet someone at a party and have them say, “You should do stand-up,” whereas I got that a lot. People just have this inherent sense of what a stand-up comic looks like. SM: Colin, what is your ultimate goal, comedy-wise? CS: One of the great slash frustrating things with comedy is that every time you reach a goal, there’s a new goal right there. That’s kind of the appeal of it: you could always be doing more, you could always be writing a new joke, so just the concept of an ultimate goal is gross. The simplest I can put it is to have comedy as my job. Stacey, you’re about six months into comedy. Do you yourself have comedy career aspirations? SM: I love my job as editor at a magazine, so I don’t want to not do that. But I’m enjoying comedy very much as a side project. My ultimate goal is I want to be on Stop Podcasting Yourself, I just want to sit down with Graham Clark and have a conversation with him where I don’t sound like an idiot. Just have to put that out there into the universe. And I’d like to be more concise.
18 HUMOUR
The inception
Expectation: Hours of creative bootcamping and it finally comes to you. The idea that will put your humour writing on the map: a reality versus expectations piece. It’s familiar, yet leaves enough room for your own touch of flair. While third-party review of the moment would argue otherwise, you swear a literal lightbulb went off over your head when the idea came to you. Hopefully you’re ready for minor celebrityhood, because it’s ready for you.
The execution
Expectation: Creativity flows from your fingertips like water from a faucet. The jokes all click and the piece comes together without the slightest hiccup. You have fun thinking of people’s wild expectations for themselves, and have slightly less fun writing the opposite realities — though paired together, the dichotomy has some wicked comedic chemistry.
Residents of Metro Vancouver haven’t had to deal with Stage 3 water restrictions for more than a decade, but with scorching summer temperatures and below-seasonal rainfall, the Lower Mainland is tightening up on water usage. August is generally the second driest month of the year, just after July, so here’s a quick rundown of what you can and cannot do under new Stage 3 water restrictions.
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August 4, 2015
Reality: During your umpteenth viewing of the indie rom-com 500 Days of Summer, you get to the heart-stomping scene where Joseph Gordon-Levitt’s expectations of an intimate dinner party fail to line up with the reality where his ex-girlfriend is now engaged. In-between mental notes on who you’re more in love with (Gordon-Levitt or Zooey Deschanel) you think to yourself, “Wouldn’t this be a fun scene to riff off of?”
Reality: What started as a funny idea with a promising premise quickly dissolves into something you’re not even sure will be workable, much less enjoyable. Is there even humour in just comparing what boils down to fiction and nonfiction? Why does Gordon-Levitt make everything look so effortlessly charming and witty?!
You are not allowed to water your lawn, either by hand or by sprinkler. You are not allowed refill your private pool. You are not allowed to bring up the weather as a point of interest, regardless of how surfacelevel the conversation is destined to be. You are allowed to support Bernie Sanders over Hillary Clinton,
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The pitch
Expectation: You’ve been sitting on this idea all week, just waiting for the next collective meeting to really blow people away with a reality versus expectations pitch. This is how Steve Jobs must have felt all those years. The words have barely left your lips before a standing ovation erupts.
The payoff
Expectation: Your piece gets shared more times than a joint at a Snoop Dogg concert. A minor celebrity posts your article and the number of visitors crashes the site. This piece was it. Your Magnum Opus, your Ulysses . What a time to be alive!
as long as your reason goes beyond simply not liking Clinton for some superficial personal reason. You are not allowed to run garden water fountains, unless they recycle water. You are not allowed to be cautiously optimistic that Pixels isn’t as bad of a movie as everyone says it is.
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Reality: Only three of your co-workers are on their phones — a new best! — as you try to explain the harmonious balance between humour and reality your piece will contain. A few chuckles are heard, and everything in the universe continues to exist, uninfluenced by your suggested retread. They’ll probably laugh more when they read the actual article.
Reality: So the website didn’t crash from web traffic as you anticipated, but that’s okay. A hundred views isn’t that bad when you think about it. The “splash” you thought it would make turned out to be more of a ripple, but that’s just the problem with reality versus expectations: reality always wins.
You are not allowed to wash your vehicle at home, unless it is for safety reasons. You are allowed to wash your vehicle at a commercial car wash. You are allowed to stop using the phrase “on point.” You are not allowed to catcall someone, regardless of how much of a compliment you think it might be.
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You are allowed to use untreated or collected rainwater for any purpose, as the water restrictions only apply to drinking water. You are not allowed to wear Crocs with socks. You are not allowed to wear Crocs in general. You are not allowed to still think that water restrictions don’t apply to you.
HUMOUR
August 4, 2015
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20 LAST WORD
editor-in-chief email
Max Hill eic@the-peak.ca
August 4, 2015
ave you ever been on campus at an event or a convocation and thought, man, I wish SFU had an official school song? Well, me neither, but the team behind our school’s 50th anniversary celebrations have introduced a contest to choose one anyways. Despite opposition, the Legacy Song Contest has whittled down its 35 entries to six, one of which will gain the honour of becoming SFU’s school song a full half-century post mortem. If I’m going to be forced to sing one of these things at my own convocation, you’d better believe I’m going to vote for my favourite. Voting closes tomorrow, so if you’re not sure which song to support, The Peak has ranked each finalist from best to worst for your convenience. Public votes for the winning song closed on Saturday, and in anticipation of our school’s new winning tune, The Peak has decided to rank the final six candidates from worst to best. Engage!
The song they play over Scientology recruitment tapes.
The eighties are alive and well at SFU. I’m getting a bit of a “Piano Man” vibe, but with cheesy synths and a stuttering tempo and less charm. Seriously, there’s something wrong with the tempo on this one. I feel like I’m watching an infomercial on local access cable, and not the funny kind.
The singer really sells it, but there’s just not enough material here to make for a good school song. Most of the lyrics seem like thrown-in references to check off a list, and the chorus at the end doesn’t really make sense. I don’t know how to make a Simon Fraser U, and I don’t think I want to know.
The biggest hit Disney song since “Let It Go.”
Oh lord, those strings. For real? How would we ever actually perform this thing? I get that the whole pounding-drum thing is supposed to be inspirational, but I just end up thinking this sounds more like Christian rock for rebellious teenagers. I can see why this song has so many votes, but it just leaves me cold. Extra points for the “native land” reference, though.
There’s some talented musicianship going on here, but this one is just a little too cheesy for me. Still, it’s not the worst.
A mediocre Jeff Buckley cover band on open mic night.
Okay, the soft guitar in the background is pretty lame, but you’ve got to love the way he rhymes SFU with “red and blue” — those are totally our colours! There’s even an engage bomb. It’s a little slow paced to imagine actually singing it at an event, and I doubt a crowd of bored students could ever pull off those vocal harmonies. The untrained singing voice is actually pretty endearing, though.
Meh. It’s short, which is a plus, and the lyrics have that perfect balance between jingoistic collectivist fervour and rugged individualism. I’m not totally sold on the tempo, but you could always speed it up and add an awesome guitar solo at the end. In fact, every song on this list should have an awesome guitar solo.
Sam Smith backed by Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros.
This guy can totally sing! Dang. Again, not sure what the deal is with these slow tempos — shouldn’t we be upbeat and happy about our school? — but I think it captures the whole engaging-the-world thing pretty well. It doesn’t really go anywhere, which can be good or bad depending on what sort of mood you want
As far as school songs go, you could do a lot worse. I can see myself singing this thing half-seriously, even. Getting sick of the “we are SFU” metaphor, though.
A pub singalong starring Joe Strummer and Raffi.
Whoa, talk about a fast tempo. This is what I’m talking about. Some cute lyrics and a fun call-and-response chorus make this one very likeable. It kind of seems like a cross between a kindergarten song and a sea shanty, which describes SFU pretty well, I think.
It’s almost two minutes long, which makes it a little unrealistic for a school song, but this one has lots of personality and the energy that’s missing from a lot of the other finalists. But seriously, can we not think of any other title for a school song?
The Police reimagined as an indie rock one-hit-wonder.
Okay, I like this one. I like it a lot. The lyrics are pretty bad, but so are the ones from all the other songs, and he rhymed “best in you” with SFU, which is either the greatest or worst thing ever. I like the whoas — they seem like a good way to get the crowd involved even if they don’t know the words — and I really like that the song doesn’t say “we’re SFU.” It doesn’t even say it once. At this point, that’s enough for me.
This one will never win the popular vote, but it won my heart. I like the ska vibe, and it’s the only song that stayed stuck in my head for hours after I listened. It’s a tough call, but this one takes the cake for me.