March 2017

TOUGHER

TOGETHER

AND LAEDYN TORI

How to be a Full-time Parent on a Part-time Schedule, Post Divorce

Parents Left Behind Bereaved Parents Find Support

New! Mom to Mom A Column for Moms, By Moms, and For the Love of Moms

*Northwest Health Physicians’ Specialty Hospital is owned, in part, by physicians.

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DYSPORT DAZE FOR M A R C H 1 3 - 1 7 CALL DETAILS

Schedule your appointment for Dysport and save $4 per unit.

Northwest Arkansas

Northwest Arkansas

Center for Plastic Surgery

Skin Care Center

D. Heath Stacey, MD BOARD CERTIFIED PLASTIC SURGEON 137 Van Asche Loop, Fayetteville, AR | 479-571-3100

www.nwacenterforplasticsurgery.com Call to schedule your FREE consultation TODAY! 2 March 2017

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4 March 2017

Whether you need prenatal care, an annual preventive exam, or gynecological screenings, Willow Creek Women’s Clinic is here for you. We also provide family planning and postpartum care as well as gynecological services for adolescents.

Visit NW-Physicians.com or call 479-757-1730 to schedule an appointment.

Ask about same-day appointments.

4301 Greathouse Springs Road, Suite 100 Johnson, AR 72762 Serena Pierson, M.D. Board-Certified OB/GYN

NW-Physicians.com Member of the Medical Staff at Willow Creek Women’s Hospital

DEDICATED TO WOMEN’S UNIQUE NEEDS AT

EVERY STAGE OF LIFE.

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The

Family KIMBERLY ENDERLE Editor-in-Chief editor@peekaboonwa.com | 479-957-0532

JONATHON ENDERLE Creative Director jon@peekaboonwa.com | 479-586-3890

Kim and Jonathon with Ava, Grant and Holden Enderle.

PHOTO BY MAIN STREET STUDIOS

CONTRIBUTING WRITER/EDITOR Frances Wilson

DISTRIBUTION/ CIRCULATION Joyce Whitaker Judy Evans Marcedalia Salinas

Jeremy Whitaker Michelle Dodson

Peekaboo Publications PO Box 1036 Bentonville, Arkansas 72712

BEN LACY Dad’s View

Columnist

VERONICA ZUCCA Story Design

Please send inquiries to: editor@peekaboonwa.com or call 479-957-0532 www.peekaboonwa.com Peekaboo may not be reproduced in whole or in part without written permission from the publisher. Views expressed herein are those of the authors and advertisers, and do not necessarily reflect the opinion of the magazine.

PEEKABOO Northwest Arkansas accepts writing contributions

6 March 2017

JENNIFER CRISTOFARO Events

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8 March 2017

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Inside

MARCH 2017

Also 36

March Calendar of Events

46

Parents Left Behind BY: SUSAN AVERITT

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Dad’s View

16

Lemonade Day!

20

WITH BEN LACY

BY: JAMI WOOD

Peekaboo's Education Directory

Bellaflies' Adora Wood

54 58

How to be a Full-time Parent, Post-divorce BY: DWAIN HEBDA

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Mom to Mom Overwhelmed toIn Control BY: MEAGAN RUFFING

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28

Meet Laedyn

Meet Tori

BY: LAUREN SPRAGUE

BY: LAUREN SPRAGUE

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Grace, Gratitude, God and Northwest Health's Dr. Green

40

Evan's Legacy BY: TRACY BILLINGSLEY

Cover Sponsored by: Northwest Health www.northwesthealth.com 10 March 2017

ON THE COVER

Laedyn Kay Sprague, Age 2, daughter of Lauren & Dylan Sprague and Tori Elizabeth Johnson, Age 2, daughter of Erin and Matt Johnson.

Photos by Lazer Lee Photography. www.lazerleephotography.com Photos shot on location at The Ravington.

www.siloamwomenscenter.com

Kyle Thompson, DO, FACOG

Chad Hill, MD, FACOG

Natalie Eiland, DO

Siloam Springs Women’s Center BOARD CERTIFIED OB - GYN SPECIALISTS SERVING SILOAM SPRINGS REGIONAL HOSPITAL

Focusing On: • Comprehensive OB Care & Delivery • Gynecological and Laparoscopic Surgery • Female Incontinence • Pelvic Pain • Pelvic Reconstruction • Minimally Invasive Outpatient Hysterectomy • In-Office Surgical Sterilization

Now Accepting New Patients Emily Goucher, APRN, WHNP-BC COMMERCIAL INSURANCE • MEDICARE • OKLAHOMA, ARKANSAS & MISSOURI MEDICAID

603-2 N. Progress Avenue, Suite 100, Siloam Springs 479.524.9312

Hours: Monday - Friday 8am to 5pm

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12 March 2017

2017

C R Y S TA L B R I D G E S

Learn about the Museum collection and grounds, enjoy artmaking activities, make friends, and have fun! See a full list of summer camps at our website.

REGISTR ATION OPENS MARCH 1

Imaginate & Create with Crystal Bridges and the Scott Family Amazeum!

June 19 – June 23 | 9:30 am – 3:00 pm [Ages 6 – 8 & 9 – 12] Enjoy the unique opportunity to travel between two museums for a one-of-a-kind summer camp experience hosted by the Scott Family Amazeum and Crystal Bridges! Visits to the Amazeum’s Imaginate exhibit and Crystal Bridges’ permanent collection and the temporary exhibition, Chihuly: In the Gallery and In the Forest, will have your camper’s imagination soaring.

Crystal Bridges summer camps sponsored by Nice-Pak Products, Inc. Scott Family Amazeum summer camps are presented by BIC Corporation.. $335 ($265/Members), register online or by calling Guest Services at 479.657.2335.

CrystalBridges.org/SummerCamps

CRYSTALBRIDGES.ORG BENTONVILLE, ARKANSAS

479.418.5700 13

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From the Editor

A look ahead: If you have a story to share, or an idea for a story, email editor@peekaboonwa. com and be a part of the Peekaboo family!

APRIL is our spotlight on all things summer camp. If you have a summer camp offering, we want to share it! ... Then don't miss our May Mother's Day issue!

Photo by: Daniel Moody Photography

It is officially March and, though the past few years have been difficult to divide into individual seasons, this month, the calendar says we are in the season known as "Spring." As I child, I remember sections of my closet exclusively devoted to winter wear, spring dresses, summer tank tops and fall items. I'm also quite confident that we never played outside in shorts and bare feet in January, or went swimming in February. Lately, however, my kids will be in a sweater on Monday, a t-shirt on Tuesday, flip flops and shorts on Wednesday, a heavy jacket on Thursday and then outside playing with friends barefoot on Friday.

Even though I cannot control the weather, or even predict it, I do make an effort to keep the kids ready for the fickle weather, which means sending them to school with a wind breaker in their bag for the afternoon, and a heavy coat for their walk from the car to the school building in the morning. When they are away at school, I don't just worry about whether they are dressed for the weather but also if they are eating enough, despite their overpacked lunchboxes. To ease my mind and fill their hearts, I try to eat lunch with my two oldest at school at least once a week. Last week, as I sat down to lay out Holden's meal his teacher walked in and told me that she had just taken Holden to the nurse's office.

While running to line up, he tripped on a tree root and his face met the tree in a very painful way.

I got to him before the nurse had even placed the bandage over the cut that ran down the side of his face. I was so glad I was able to get to him so quickly, but I wished I had been there just 5 minutes earlier... to be in the right place at the right time to 14 March 2017

prevent the collision. To combat this guilt, I focused my energy on comforting him and distracting him from the pain. I also encouraged him that he would feel better soon, and begged him to slow down a bit to prevent any other accidents in the future--a very, very large request for an active seven-year-old boy, but I thought, in this moment, the request might be well received.

That one simple incident pretty much sums up the way I wish I could be as a parent--and also the reality of parenthood. No matter how much I want to protect my little ones, I can't always be there to prevent the unknown. I can, however, always be there to comfort them, offer them guidance, and give them unconditional love. I can also do everything I can to make sure that they are surrounded by good people, mentors, and positive caretakers.

Northwest Arkansas is full of amazing groups who take this parenting philosophy and make it their mission. These non-profits dedicate their time and their hearts to helping children and families in need, behind the scenes, without asking for thanks or recognition. In their journey to make the best of a situation--from providing food for families otherwise going without, or clothing to keep them warm, even to helping children find their forever family--these selfless groups do everything they can to make sure life is a little better for our NWA community. I am so honored, and so thankful, to personally know a number of the leaders behind these non-profit organizations and am always amazed at the size of their hearts. I am so proud to call this place home, and can safely say there is no better place to raise my family than right here.

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Building with blocks leads to strong math skills. It is also a fun way to bond with your child. Let your child lead the play. Your job is to ask questions and help if you are asked. Let your imaginations work. Are you building a zoo or a skyscraper? How high can you build it?

What does this have to do with math? Your child is learning math concepts while she plays. These skills will serve her well when it comes time for geometry and algebra.

Blocks are not just for boys. Girls benefit just as much as boys from building blocks.

Is there a more fun way to learn math than baking cookies? Think of all the tools that need names. Think of all the measuring and counting. The squishing and rolling of dough are blissful.

Children naturally want to help and cooking sounds so grown up. And the payoff – cookies!

Don’t think about the mess. The experience is worth it. Count out loud as you scoop and pour together. How many eggs? How many cups of flour? Your child is learning about measurements and weight. He learns about keeping time when you set the oven timer.

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Blocks are not just fo benefit just as much building blocks.

Is there a more fun way to learn math than baking cookies? Think of all the tools that need names. Think of all the measuring and counting. The squishing and rolling of dough are blissful.

Click here to visit our Resource Library. You’ll find activities and tips to help you prepare your child for life.

Don’t think about the mess. The experience is worth it. Count out loud as you

Division of Child Care and Early Childhood Education

www.ARBetterBeginnings.com 1-800-445-3316

scoop and pour together. How many eggs? How many cups of flour? Your www.ARBetterBeginnings.com • 1-800-445-3316

Children naturally want to help and cooking sounds so grown up. And the payoff – cookies!

child is learning about measurements and weight. He learns about keeping Is there a more fun way to learn math than baking cookies? T time when you set the oven timer.

the tools that need names. Think of all the measuring and co squishing and rolling of dough are blissful.

Learn more at bit.ly/peekmath Children naturally want to help and

Make a weekly calendar with your child. Give her the help shecooking needs, but let so grown up. And the sounds her do as much as possible. Ask your child to draw pictures that indicate each payoff – cookies! activity of the week on small pieces of paper. Ask her to tape the pictures on the right day on the calendar.

Not enough pictures? Book some. Plan a tea party or indoor “camp out.” She is learning the days of the week. She understands “yesterday,” “today” and “tomorrow.” She won’t forget the date you booked.

Don’t think about the mess. The experience is worth it. Coun scoop and pour together. How many eggs? How many cups child is learning about measurements and weight. He learns time when you set the oven timer.

Having a calendar and knowing what is coming up during the week helps your child feel in control.

Make a weekly calendar with your child. Give her the help she needs, but let her do as much as possible. Ask your child to draw pictures that indicate each activity of the week on small pieces of paper. Ask her to tape the pictures on the right day on the calendar.

Not enough pictures? Book some. Plan a tea party or indoor “camp out.” She is learning the days of the week. She understands “yesterday,” “today” and “tomorrow.” She won’t forget the date you booked.

Click here to visit our Resource Library. You’ll find activities and tips to help you prepare your child for life.

Division of Child Care and Early Childhood Education

Division of Child Care and Early Childhood Education

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www.ARBetterBeginnings.com

1-800-445-3316 www.ARBetterBeginnings.com 1-800-445-3316

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www.ARBetterBeginnings.com • 1-800-445-331

Learn more a bit.ly/peekma peekaboonwa.com 15

Northwest Arkansas This year, on Saturday, May 6th, the 3rd annual Northwest Arkansas Lemonade Day will take place, resulting in over 100 lemonade stands set up across the entire corridor.

And the kids running these stands? Determined entrepreneurs who have studied how to set up and run a business, fully prepared to generate revenue! Last year, over 900 youths participated in Bentonville, Fayetteville, Springdale, Rogers, Siloam Springs, Gentry and Westfork, with expectations of 1,600 kids in 2017. Reports show that the 2016 average gross stand revenue was $326, though some stands brought in as much as $800. As the business owner, the kids keep all their proceeds, and there is no charge to participate.

This program was brought to the NWA region in 2015 by Big Brothers Big Sisters of Northwest Arkansas.

Working with an adult to complete the 14 lessons in the workbook (or 22 online lessons), the kids study various aspects of running their own small business, including product design, advertising, budgeting, location selection and even writing a business plan. Stands can be run by individual families where children work with their mentors, parents or grandparents, or through regional community partners including the Girl or Boy Scouts, Boys and Girls Clubs, and a growing number of elementary, middle and high schools. The Presenting Sponsor, The Walmart Museum, has even donated the Sam Walton GO FOR IT award to the youth who exemplify excellence in the Best Tasting, Best Stand and the Best Business Plan contests.

In 2016, the GO FOR IT Award was given to Dana Ward’s 4th grade class at Bayyari Elementary, who best exemplified excellence in all of the contest categories. When asked about whether she would recommend Lemonade Day to other teachers, Ms. Ward replied, “Lemonade Day is an amazing program that gets the entire community involved. To be able to create all of this, and then to see it work in a real-life setting is an experience that these students will remember forever. In fact, the children learned so many life skills that went above and beyond what I expected. They learned about budgeting, saving, cost-cutting, trading services, and much more. No matter what path each of them takes in 16 March 2017

life, these are skills that they will need at every age."

While working with the digital curriculum, the class was broken into department teams, including management, product development, food safety, marketing, accounting, and philanthropy. Product development decided to have the class sample several types of lemonade in a blind taste test, concluding that the powdered lemonade was an overwhelming favorite and much more cost-

Lemonade Day is a program administered by Big Brothers Big Sisters of Northwest Arkansas Since 1993, Big Brothers Big Sisters NWA has been offering free-of-charge mentoring services to the region’s young people living in poverty, with an incarcerated parent or from a single parent home. Through our one-to-one mentoring programs where the child (the “Little”) is paired with a caring adult volunteer (the “Big”), we can help ensure success for at-risk children. This mentoring improves the child’s school attendance, creates healthier peer relationships, makes them less likely to use drugs or alcohol, improves their ability to avoid physical violence, and enhances their self-esteem and outlook on the future. Our programs are 100% funded locally through philanthropic support; it costs approximately $1,000 to conduct interviews, run background checks and match a Big and Little, and then monitor the match for a year. There are over 40 children on our waiting list, and we encourage you to support BBBS NWA either financially or by becoming a Big, Big Couple or Big Family. www.bbbsnwa.org

effective than fresh-squeezed.

To write the business plan, the management team gathered information from each department and sat with Ms. Ward to work on the business plan.

A few times they realized that they needed advice, so they called a lawyer, a banker, and various others. Together, they chose a Minion theme for the stand design, and the construction and design department had to work with the other departments to make sure the stand was a reflection of the overall concept.

Shelter, purchase sports equipment for the school, and celebrate with a pizza party. And the biggest surprise of all was winning the Sam Walton award-what a proud moment for those kids! They started with nothing and created an award-winning business out of hard work and determination, not because anyone did the work for them or told them how to do it.”

And how did the actual May 7th Lemonade Day go? Ms. Ward reports, “We set up at the Mill Street Market in Springdale, along with the other three classes from Bayyari. There was Lemonade Day is a FREE, fun, experiential learning program a lot of parent interest, so most of the that teaches youth how to start, own and operate their own class showed up at their assigned time business – a lemonade stand. Lemonade Day is a program to work a shift. The Little Craft Show was a short walk away and, on a whim, a championed by Big Brothers Big Sisters of Northwest Arkansas. few students put together a mobile stand to deliver to the craft vendors. They wheeled money and It is not too late to sign up your kids (or their lemonade back and forth for the rest of the day and troop, club or classroom) for this year’s Lemonade it turned out to be very lucrative for them.”

Day! Who knows… the next Sam Walton might be under your very own roof! Visit nwa.

“Mrs. Ward’s class stand generated $532, enabling lemonadeday.org or email the City Director, 1200 S.E. 28th St. Bentonville, AR the class to donate $200 to the Springdale Animal Jennifer at japolskis@bbbsnwa.org.

3538 N. Hwy 112 St.2 Fayetteville, AR

479.330.1201

lipsandlines@gmail.com www.lipsandlinesllc.com

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BY: JAMI WOOD

or what felt like my entire life, I had always dreamed of having a family of my own-- how it would feel to have a tiny human growing inside my body, and experiencing the beauty of labor. After three years of trying, I found out that I was pregnant. I felt so happy and lucky that I had a very normal, healthy pregnancy.

I was 24 years old, and was induced around 42 weeks. I was given the epidural, my water broke, and we were off! I was so excited to push and have my baby. Unfortunately, despite all my dreams and ideals, it didn't happen as easily as that.

In fact, my labor was very, very traumatic. After pushing and pushing for what seemed like forever, the obstetrician told me, “You aren't doing it right," and stopped the epidural. Four hours, and three suction cups (used multiple times) later, my daughter, Adora’s, heart rate dropped on the monitor. Finally, the doctor decided to do an emergency cesarean. I remember my mother banging on the door, worried to death because of the amount of time it was taking. I was taken to another room, given a spinal tap, and there was my baby, right in front of my eyes… purple.

I knew that I was supposed to hear her cry... but I did not. She was completely silent. I was taken to yet another room because my body was trembling-I was in shock. When the doctors finally came in to give her to us, Adora’s father immediately said, "Something isn't right...” and he was correct. After all, she was purple and not breathing right, and she was not crying. The nurse took her back to the nursery, and, a short while later, the pediatrician came in to tell us that she was having seizures and a helicopter was on the way. I hadn't even gotten to hold her. What in the world was going on? Was she okay?!

I was stuck in the hospital, wild with fear and worry. I had to say goodbye to my newborn baby through a clear box before she was put on Angel 20 March 2017

One, and I watched her leave in a helicopter from my room. I didn't know if I would ever be able to hold her, or see her again. I felt hopeless... so much so that I couldn't move. My entire body was swollen and my heart was broken. We were both confused, in a state of pure and utter shock.

Adora's father jumped in his truck and headed to Arkansas Children's Hospital in Little Rock. I received a phone call from him later that night, wherein he told me that Adora had had a stroke at birth. A stroke?! My baby? I was emotionally gone, and my mind was blown. I had never even heard of babies having strokes. After all, the only people you hear of getting strokes are adults.

About a week later, I was released from the hospital, and I headed straight to ACH to join my baby.

Adora was in the NICU at ACH. When I saw her, she had tubes everywhere, and the doctors were, truth be told, unsure if she would survive. We, however, knew our baby was going to pull through. Our faith kept us alive, and gave us hope. Our faith was strong, and it was strong in her. We were shown her MRI, and, my goodness, that was scary. Just because we had faith didn’t mean we weren’t terrified! The right side of her brain was gone, as well as a small spot on her left. She had a blood clot in her carotid artery, was diagnosed with brain damage, cerebral palsy, and epilepsy. We were completely overwhelmed by her multiple diagnoses, and cried… a lot. We were told that she might not be able to walk, talk, or do anything.

I finally, finally got to hold my precious baby girl

ellaflies

two weeks later. We stayed at the Ronald McDonald House for three months. It was a blessing to be able to be there, close, and with other families.

After weeks of praying, we were able to take her home. We were happy, I suppose, but also scared to death to take her home with no doctor or nurse. I did not sleep, instead watching her constantly to make sure she was breathing, feeding her, and giving her medications on time. All I could do was hold her and thank God that she and I were both alive.

Her tiny hands stayed in a fist in her ‘Joe Cool’ splints, and her eyes were locked to one side. She started occupational therapy and physical therapy when she was only three months old, and then started speech therapy when she was 18 months old, followed by hippotherapy at age 2. Adora was behind, but she did it! She even ended up walking!

All of these different kind of therapies has made a huge impact. She still has to wear braces on her feet, and on her left hand, as well as needing to wear glasses. Later on, an eye surgery was scheduled, because the doctor said that her eyesight was very, very bad and that her right eye would wander.

Now, she has to wear a patch over her right eye for two hours a day.

She is almost five now, and, far from doing nothing, she walks, talks, and plays! Her favorite things to do are dance and go to church. At church she opens the door, greets everyone, and hugs everyone. She even goes up to the very front, raising her right

Turn the page …

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SIGNS OF NEONATAL STROKES Hemiparesis or weakness on one side (chooses one side to do things instead of using both) New-onset of seizures (most common symptom of neonatal stroke) • Blank staring • Pedaling of limbs • Jerking movements • Apnea In some instances, there are no outward symptoms of neonatal stroke.

Unfortunately, the stroke may go undetected for several months.

As the child grows older, symptoms such as speech difficulties, imbalance, and numbness on one side of the body may appear; symptoms that are almost impossible to detect in newborn babies.

arm, and her left to the best of her ability, and give praise.

She is so loving and kind-hearted.

Initially after her diagnosis, I felt helpless. I didn't have anyone to talk to, as pediatric stroke isn't something that many people are aware of. Luckily, I met other mothers on Facebook through The Bellaflies Foundation, and other online support groups. There, I found mothers going through similar obstacles, and we were all able to help each other in one way or another. Staying positive was, and is, key.

To the new mothers of pediatric stroke survivors: it's a long and stressful road, but don't ever think that you are alone.

Be persistent in therapy. Raise awareness. Did you know that 99% of money for stroke research is for adults, and 1% goes to pediatric patients? Let's join together to raise awareness for the parents of those who may become affected. Pediatric stroke knowledge could save your baby (even unborn baby) or child's life!

For more information about pediatric strokes, and to get your free awareness information please visit www.bellaflies.org. To support the lifesaving awareness, research, and education that The Bellaflies Foundation funds you can make your tax-deductible donation online, and/or support their annual Strides for Strokes family friendly event in Downtown Rogers on May 12th.

100 West Center, Ste 101 Fayetteville 479-444-7778 22 March 2017

Windmill Theatre’s

Grug and The Rainbow

Saturday, April 8 | 2 shows

$8

TICKETS

Back by popular demand! Join us for this heartwarming performance about a funny little creature who goes on a big adventure.

Best for ages 1+

Kids Series sponsor

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By: Lauren Sprague Photos by: Lazer Lee Photography

Today an angel walks among us.

We don’t know this individual but they have given us the greatest gift we could ever receive.

In May of 2015, at just 5 months old, our daughter Laedyn was diagnosed with Acute Myeloid Leukemia (AML). Laedyn went through 6 months of harsh chemo treatment spending most of the time in-patient at Arkansas Children’s Hospital in Little Rock. She finished treatment and was considered in remission shortly before her 1st birthday. We looked forward to getting back to a normal life and living under one roof.

The second year of Laedyn’s life started off strong.

Her hair was growing back, she was learning new things every day and all around thriving. That all changed come March when we were hit with the news that Laedyn relapsed.

We knew this time chemo alone wouldn’t be enough to save our daughter. Laedyn would need to go through several more months of chemo treatment preparing her body to receive a bone marrow transplant at Mayo Clinic Hospital in Rochester, MN. We first looked to her brother Callen as a potential donor, unfortunately he was not a match. We then turned to Be the Match® to find a viable donor. Be the Match® is operated by the National Marrow Donor Program® who manages the largest and most diverse marrow registry in the world.

God answered our prayers as the list turned up a potential donor that was a 10 out of 10 matchour angel who is walking amongst us!

24 March 2017

On July 5th, 2016 Laedyn received the donor’s bone marrow. The bone marrow transplant was very anticlimactic. The procedure took three hours and was just like receiving a blood transfusion. It was all the testing before, harsh chemo and medications, feeding tube, sickness and other issues that made the transplant a very scary (yet - hopeful) time for Laedyn and our family. Laedyn was kept secluded in an isolated area and wasn’t able to leave her hospital room for about 30 days. Once she was discharged she had to remain within the Rochester city limits for another 70 days. Our family made it through this time by rotating family in and out of Minnesota to be with Laedyn .

We were fortunate that Laedyn had no issues with her body taking on the new marrow and on day 100 posttransplant she was given the greenlight to go back to Arkansas.

Shortly after, we celebrated Laedyn’s 2nd birthday on Thanksgiving Day – the perfect reminder of how blessed and thankful we were for answered prayers and for our friends, family, co-workers, medical staff and even complete strangers (most importantly her donor) who helped us and our sweet girl along the way. Our family was ecstatic and relieved her transplant was successful!

Today, Laedyn continues to do well with minimal complications. We have been so happy to see her grow and flourish and turn into one bright, funny and happy little girl despite all that she has had to go through in her short life.

July 2018 will mark two years from her transplant and the date we will be able to make contact with her donor (if they choose to meet us). For now they will continue to be the anonymous angel who saved Laedyn’s life, in which we will forever be grateful!

You can be an angel too, by joining the registry at www.BeTheMatch.com. Your gift could give a patient, like Laedyn a second chance at life!

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26 March 2017

Calling all kids in kindergarten through third grade!

Write and illustrate a story for a chance to win cool prizes like this PBS KIDS Playtime Pad!

Each Arkansas student who enters will be recognized, and winners will receive AETN prize packs.

Submit stories to AETN by

Friday, April 7.

For more information, visit:

aetn.org/writerscontest

or email marketing@aetn.org

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By: Erin Johnson Photos by: Lazer Lee Photography

Tuesday, October 20, 2015 is the day that changed our family's life forever, and a day we will never forget.

The day started out the same way as it does for a lot of NWA families--we were rushing around, trying to get ourselves and our two girls ready so that we could get them to daycare and us on with our day. Around 10:30am, I got a text, then a call from Tori’s teacher, letting us know that she was getting sick and not acting normal. Around noon, my husband picked the girls back up from daycare, and by 2:30pm we were at the pediatrician to see what was causing our baby--who was perfectly fine a few hours ago--to throw up and be so lethargic. The nurse and pediatrician took one look at Tori and sent us straight to the emergency room at Mercy. Things moved fast when we got to the ER, and we were quickly told that there was something going on with Tori’s brain and that was what was causing her to be so sick. The situation was so serious that Tori needed to be air lifted to Arkansas Children’s Hospital in Little Rock. There they would be able to do further testing to tell us what exactly was happening.

I rode with Tori on the helicopter, and as we took off, there was a beautiful sunset over NWA. I remember sitting there basically in disbelief, looking at our nine-month-old baby, thinking, "How is this happening? How can she be this sick?

When I dropped her off at daycare not even 8 28 March 2017

hours ago, she smiled at me and waved bye-bye... how could we be on this helicopter headed to Little Rock?" When we landed at ACH, they rushed Tori to the PICU, where we met Dr. Albert, who would end up being our guardian angel. I talked with Dr. Albert for about 5 minutes before he showed me Tori’s CT scan and I realized what he was telling me. He was telling me that our perfect baby had brain cancer. Cancer? Our baby had cancer? Not only did she have cancer, but, due to the believed type and location of the tumor, there was not a lot of hope that there would be a treatment that could offer her long-term survival. With no treatment, they believed she would only live for maybe two weeks; if we did decide to move forward with a treatment, then she might gain nine months. Dr. Albert had to rush off to perform a procedure on Tori to relieve the pressure off her brain, as I was left standing there, in the middle of the PICU, with this news about our baby while my husband (Matt), older daughter (Sydney) and my parents made the three-hour drive down from NWA to Little Rock, not knowingwhat news lay in store.

Matt’s family lives in Conway, so when I walked into the PICU waiting room, his family was already there waiting for me. We decided that we didn’t need to tell Matt the news while they were

driving down. I will never forget the moment when Matt walked into the waiting room. He was being so strong and positive, and then I had to tell him that his precious baby had cancer. At that moment, there were no more words. We sat there holding each other crying like we were babies. As a parent, your job is to protect your baby, and at that moment we had never felt so helpless.

mourn, but during the present, while she was in our arms, she was going to experience happiness.

This positivity was not only key to Tori, but equally to Sydney, who was almost four when her little sister became sick. We wanted to preserve their innocence as much as possible.

Tori had one round of induction chemo at ACH before we were transferred to Children’s The next couple of days were a blur of tears, Mercy Hospital in Kansas City for insurance tests, prayers, questions, the realization that reasons. In Kansas City at CMH, Tori had one there may not be a treatment option, and the more induction chemo round before having introduction of a new language —“medical three high-dose chemo rounds with stem cell talk.” Tori had a surgery to transplants between each Cancer is an ugly disease, and biopsy the tumor on Friday, round. We are beyond childhood cancer seems to be even October 23. The goal was blessed in that both of our to get enough of the tumor families stepped up and did uglier. We share her story because, to be able to identify what absolutely anything and through the ugliness, our family, type of cancer she had. Dr. everything that we needed. experienced greatness from people Albert performed a miracle In the six months of chemo that day, as he was able to and we feel that greatness is especially treatments, between my not only get enough of found in the people here... in our little husband, myself and both corner of Northwest Arkansas. the tumor to identify the of our parents we would cancer, but remove the take week-long shifts entire tennis ball-sized tumor! After the surgery, staying with Tori, thus allowing my husband there was a slight glimmer of hope that it might and me to continue to work and be at home not be the horrible cancer that they first believed with Sydney. Our goal was to try and keep life as it to be; however, the following Wednesday the normal as possible in the most trying of times. pathology lab came back with confirmation We believe it was critical for our girls to see that Tori had AT/RT (Atypical Teratorid Rhabdoid even through the toughest of times, you can Tumor). AT/RT is rare, and only accounts for band together and still find happiness and some 1-2% of childhood brain tumors. sort of normalcy. There were some extremely Turn the page …

AT/RT is typically is very hard to treat because it is so aggressive that even some of the highest dose chemo treatments can’t keep up with the growth.

Due to the miracle of Dr. Albert removing the whole tumor, Tori had a chance. For the first time, we were being given hope that now she could have a treatment! As a family, we quickly came to a couple of conclusions: 1. We were going to fight HARD. We consulted with our ACH doctors and other doctors from around the country and decided on the protocol that we all thought would give her the best chance at long term survival. 2.

We were not going to be sad or negative around Tori. I believe this has been key to our journey. We decided that no matter what came our way, we were going to shower Tori with positivity and happiness. If her treatment and results did not go the way we wanted, then we would have that time to

long nights, some meltdowns (by everyone), scary times, but on April 8, 2016 we walked out of CMH with our happy baby, and on April 14th we came home to Northwest Arkansas to open arms of love and support. We did have to go to Oklahoma City for six weeks for proton radiation to finish up Tori’s treatment; however, we could come home every weekend, so it didn’t seem nearly as bad as when we were going through chemo.

Currently, Tori is seven months post all treatment, showing no evidence of cancer and is a thriving toddler. Her blessings continue in that she does not have some of the severe side effects that her type of cancer usually leaves.

Her hair has filled back in, she is in therapies from the few side effects of all the treatments, and she has even started back at daycare. Since that horrible day in October of 2015, we have grown and learned more about medicine and the need to always be an advocate for your child. We also have been reminded how great the human spirit can still be. Cancer is an ugly disease, and childhood cancer seems to be even uglier. Despite that ugliness, we share her story, because through the ugliness our family experienced greatness from people, and we feel that true greatness in people is especially found in the people here in our little corner of 30 March 2017

Northwest Arkansas. The NWA community has embraced our family and helped us through this past year.

From the very minute that Tori became sick, our friends, family and complete strangers jumped into action. We had people taking care of our dogs, providing meals, sending gift cards, sitting with us in waiting rooms and a million other things that we will never be able to say thank you enough for. During a point in history when every time you turn on the news, you see negativity and division, we have experienced love, compassion and warmth from total strangers. In what has been the most trying of times in our lives, we have found a silver lining in that we have gained an army of friends in our community. Until the day comes when no family must deal with childhood cancer, our hope is that Tori’s story will show that in even the darkest of times, you can choose to find good. We know that allowing people to help is not a sign of weakness, but a sign of strength. At the end of the day, in these busy lives that we all lead, the well-being of our families is what is most important. Like the old saying goes, "It takes a village to raise a child."

Well, the NWA village has been there for our family and we couldn't feel more blessed and honored to call this home! Team Tori is Team NWA!

March

Early Learner Programs @

1009 MUSEUM WAY • BENTONVILLE, AR AMAZEUM.ORG • 479-696-9280

STEAM Studio March 2, 9 & 30 10 am - noon Family-led STEAM themed developmentally appropriate learning FREE no registration required Baby Buds (6-17 mos + caregiver) Action Art! March 1, Encore March 2 10-11 am $10 members/$15 non-members

Discovery Tots (18-36 mos + caregiver) Action Art! March 8, Encore March 9 10-11 am $10 members/$15 non-members

Great Pretenders (3-5 years + caregiver) Action Art! March 15, Encore March 16 10-11 am $10 members/$15 non-members Zing Adventures (4-6 years + caregiver) Hybrid Art March 25, 9-10 am $10 members/$15 non-members Baby Buds, Discovery Tots, Great Pretenders and Zing Adventures require advanced registration and payment: amazeum.org/events-andprograms/early-learners/ peekaboonwa.com

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GRACE, GRATITUDE, GOD AND DR. GREEN

's Story A Survivor S

ue Scott has been married for more than 29 years to Benton County Circuit Court Judge John Scott. They have four children, seven grandchildren and one great grandchild. She ran a catering business for 12 years, in addition to serving as an Arkansas state legislator. She is no stranger to commitment and hard work.

Sue started to notice something was wrong when she was falling behind on her husband’s campaign for circuit judge. She was initially diagnosed as premenopausal. Sue did not agree, so she got a second opinion from Dr. Michael Green, board certified interventional cardiologist at Northwest Medical Center – Springdale. The cardiac cath lab team at the hospital and Dr. Green treated Sue. She had an electrocardiogram (EKG) one afternoon and was admitted shortly thereafter to Northwest Medical Center – Springdale. By evening, Sue had a pacemaker/defibrillator implanted in her.

“Survival for me can be summed up in three words, ‘Never, Give, Up.' That is truly the heart of it, the heart of the journey, just keep trying, every day."

“Dr. Green’s news, so many years ago, on that Thursday afternoon changed my life. I remember as soon as he gave me my diagnosis he placed his hand on my arm and said, ‘we can do this’, ‘you and me, as a team.’ I had a picture of my family and I said, ‘here are the reasons that you have to make me well.’ I will never forget his response. He opened his phone and there was a picture of his beautiful children. He said ‘these little faces are the reason I give 100 percent to my patients every day.’

I knew then, God had sent me this smart, caring, compassionate man to walk this journey with me.”

Sue’s had multiple procedures replacing pacemakers and receiving stents. Her fourth pacemaker was implanted in July 2016. “Dr. Green, my only cardiologist, has treated me for the past 14 ½ years until September of 2016 when he then referred me to the Transplant Team in Little Rock,” Sue said. She was placed on the transplant waiting list in October 2016 because of her multiple heart conditions, including congestive heart failure (CHF).

32 March 2017

CHF teaches you many lessons, Sue said. First of all it brings you to your knees in prayer. Secondly, you become very grateful, the small things in life mean more than before. Thirdly, you receive Grace, Grace that sees you through and gives you energy to smile and hope, wonderful hope.

“I am much more thankful for just about everything now, a grandchild’s sweet voice, humming birds on the zinnias in our garden, energy, any amount of,” Sue said. “If I awake in the mornings my prayers of gratefulness begin. Yes, I pray for Dr. Green and the staff at Northwest Health daily.”

“Talk about a new chapter,” Sue said. “We are now on the transplant journey, trying to follow their directions. It is my family’s journey as well and their support is paramount.”

Sue watches what she eats and tries to stay active.

She plays with her grandchildren, bakes the most delicious treats, and gardens as much as she can.

Sue says her vegetables may feed her family’s bellies, but her zinnias feed their souls.

“I think having this disease has made me much more thoughtful and much more thankful,” Sue said.

“Survival for me can be summed up in three words, ‘Never, Give, Up,’” Sue said. “That is truly the heart of it, the heart of the journey, just keep trying, every day. My gratefulness to the team at Northwest Health is overwhelming; I owe the team so much.”

“It is my belief today that without Dr. Green I would not be alive,” Sue said. “He has encouraged me, he has picked me up and put me back on my feet at my worst. He is our friend, our dear, dear friend. Over the last 14 1/2 years his staff has come to mean so much to my husband John and me. They return our calls and they greet me with their true caring spirits. I have walked in to some appointments almost in tears and I have left feeling much better. Dr. Green never made promises of grandeur. He has always been very honest. Honesty creates trust.”

“I still have many steep hills to climb,” Sue said. “I have taught myself not to look up at the top of the hill. Instead I have concentrated on wearing the right boots for the climb to the top. Thank you Dr. Green, it has been wonderful knowing you too have your boots on for my journey.”

Celebrate with an arty party Birthday Parties Paint Your Own Pottery Canvas and Wood Crafting Art Lessons & More Rogers (479) 619-6085 Fayetteville (479) 531-9718 Walk-ins Welcome

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“I “BUILT A CIRCUIT BOARD AT SCHOOL. I BUILT A CIRCUIT BOARD AT SCHOOL. ”” As As Evie’s eyeseyes twinkle andand sheshe gives a big thumbs up,up, sheshe cancan Evie’s twinkle gives a big thumbs telltell youyou whywhy SHESHE LOVES SCHOOL. LOVES SCHOOL.

Evie’s school dayday in prekindergarten maymay begin with Evie’s school in prekindergarten begin with singing in music, creating art and end with creating singing in music, creating art and end with creating in the tinkering studio. in the tinkering studio.

“We“We getget to build stuff, andand wewe BUILT A CIRCUIT to build stuff, BUILT A CIRCUIT BOARD! AndAnd we we go go to Art Studio every day!”

BOARD! to Art Studio every day!”

WithWith a curriculum focused on on science, a curriculum focused science, technology, engineering, arts and technology, engineering, arts and mathematics (STEAM), ourour students learn mathematics (STEAM), students learn from integration of these dynamic areas at at from integration of these dynamic areas an an early age.age. early OurOur lowlow student, teacher ratio andand caring student, teacher ratio caring faculty helphelp students looklook at the world faculty students at the world in ainnew way.way. a new

SeeSee what TheThe New School what New School experience cancan mean experience mean forfor your child. your child.

Schedule a tour today by by calling Schedule a tour today calling 479-521-7037 or visit 479-521-7037 or visit thenewschool.org. thenewschool.org.

Evie Evie PrePre KK

PREMIER INDEPENDENT NORTHWEST ARKANSAS’ PREMIER INDEPENDENT NORTHWEST ARKANSAS’ SCHOOL SERVING PRESCHOOL THROUGH GRADE 9 9 SCHOOL SERVING PRESCHOOL THROUGH GRADE

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The New School is anisindependent school thatthat respects, embraces, andand celebrates diversity in its student body, andand The New School an independent school respects, embraces, celebrates diversity in curriculum, its curriculum, student body, staff.staff.

The New School doesdoes not discriminate on the of race, religion, gender, sexual orientation, color, national or ethnic The New School not discriminate on basis the basis of race, religion, gender, sexual orientation, color, national or ethnic origin in the of students, in hiring, or inorthe administration of its program. origin in admission the admission of students, in hiring, in the administration of educational its educational program.

34 March 2017

walk-in clinic Staffed by our Board Certified Pediatricians Open 6 Days a Week Monday – Friday 8:OO AM to 7:30PM Saturday 8:00 AM to 11:00 AM

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MARCH 2017 March 5

Library Story Times: Bentonville Public Library: bentonvillelibrary.org Fayetteville Public Library: faylib.org Springdale Public Library: springdalelibrary.org Rogers Public Library: rogerspubliclibrary.org Siloam Springs Library: siloamsprings.com

Brown Bear, Brown Bear and other Treasured Stories by Eric Carle Starr Theater at Walton Arts Center 2pm and 4pm Mermaid Theatre of Nova Scotia, a perennial WAC favorite, returns with a triple-bill production highlighting three of Eric Carle’s most beloved tales – bringing together old favorites and new friends with whimsical music and striking scenic effects. Performed with black light effects, puppetry, live animation, projected images and object movement, this imaginative performance is perfect for introducing your children to the magic of live theater! Best for ages 5+

One District One Book

March 2

X-Factor Homeschool Physical Education Class Yvonne Richardson Community Center Fayetteville 9:30 - 11:00am Ages: 6 - 17 FREE but registration required as space is limited.

The YRCC offers a free weekly physical education class for children enrolled in home-school to ensure that participants receive training in Health and Fitness as part of their studies.

Classes teach the fundamentals of warm-up, physical activity, teamwork, health education, and nutrition all while partnering with local organizations to enhance and expand learning opportunities. Tues & Thursdays--- call ahead 479-444-3461

Open Play Gymnastics Joe's (age 10 & under) 10:00am - 12:00pm $5/ child per hour Need a place for kids to burn off their energy inside? Gymnastic Joe's in the NWA Mall has Open Play for ages 10 & under on Monday-Sat from 10-11 and again from 11-12. Kids can run wild on the in-ground trampolines, jump in the foam pit, and bounce around on the spring-loaded floor, and play on the recently added inflatable bounce-house/slide. www.gymnasticsjoes.com

Spring Cleaning Rogers Historical Museum March 4 10am - 5pm Come learn about the hard work involved in spring cleaning at the turn of the century through guided tours of the Hawkins House. Exhibit will be open though May 20th.

Mom's Day Out: Girl's Painting Session: Spring Doorhangers Imagine Studios Village on the Creek, Rogers 11:00am -1:00pm

March 4

Special Eric Carle Storytime with the Walton Arts Center Barnes & Noble (Fayetteville, AR) 11am - 3pm We will be hosting a special storytime with readings and activities from the Walton Arts Center actors to showcase a few of the Eric Carle books they will be performing on Sunday March 5th at their facility.

36 February 2017

Crystal Bridges 1:00 - 4:00pm Join us for a wrap-up celebration of the city-wide One District One Book reading program! Bring the whole family for an afternoon of music, artmaking, and games with friends from Bentonville Public Schools, the Bentonville Public Library, and other community collaborators. Free, no registration required.

March 7-11

LITTLE TRIKE SERIES Trike Theatre 9:30am and 11:00am Professional theatre geared towards children ages 2 to 5, introducing them to theatre in an engaging, interactive and lively environment. Three Billy Goats Gruff — With the audience’s help, two trolls retell the scariest story known to their tribe – THE THREE BILLY GOAT’S GRUFF.

March 9

STEAM Studio Amazeum 10:00am - noon Families with children under the age of 6 years can explore, play, and discover together. The Early Learner STEAM Studio embraces children’s natural curiosity by developing their interest in science, technology, engineering, art, and math (STEAM). Everyday play experiences are brimming exceptional educational opportunities and the learning becomes deeper and longer lasting when a caring adult plays too.

Preschool Playdate » Remixturements Crystal Bridges 11:30am - 2:00pm Make your own musical instrument! Enjoy art projects, story time, and creative play inspired by found-object musical instruments in the temporary exhibition Border Cantos.

Free, no registration required.

March 10

Parent-Child Craft Workshop IMAGINE-A Child's Adventure World, Fayetteville 10:30 - 11:00am and 3pm $6.00 per child for 2 hours of play and adults are free or $10 day pass/ child Specially designed for children 8 and under. Parents/ guardians can bring their little ones to play in a creative, safe environment. Kids will love it and can spend hours playing in all of the themed rooms.

March 10

March 17

Imagine Studios Village on the Creek, Rogers 6:00 - 8:00pm

Imagine Studios Village on the Creek, Rogers

Family Art Night: Clay Hand Bowls

Mar 11

Land of the Silver Birch: A Sing Along and Museum Storytime The Museum of Native American History, Bentonville 10:30 - 11:00am Museum of Native American History Storytime -geared towards ages 3 to 8 but all ages welcome!

March's storytime will feature Miss Cindy of the Peel Compton Foundation. Miss Cindy will present "Land of the Silver Birch" A traditional folk song featuring Native American themes! Kiddos will sing, move and play along! Sing along will be followed by a Native American Folk Tale and Color Station. Free and open to the public.

Royal Readers (with your favorite princesses!)

Fayetteville Public Library 10:30am Princesses are coming to FPL! A fairytale story will be shared, and then the royalty will be available for meet and greet and photos. Come dressed in your best to meet your favorite princesses, and a prince! This family event is free and open to the public.

The LEGO Batman Movie Event Barnes and Noble Rogers 4:00pm At the finale for our three-month celebration of The LEGO Batman Movie, kids will be able to help Batman protect Gotham from the Joker by making their very own LEGO Batman Speedwagon! Kids can also collect the final two limited edition trading cards featuring characters from the movie. Join us for this fun LEGO Make & Take event (while supplies last).

March 15

Parent Cafe Amazeum 6:00 - 7:30pm Adult caregivers It’s food for thought! The Parent Café workshop mixes it up, chops, slices and dices new ways to create your own family play culture. The Amazeum education team will be serving up plenty of play recipes that can make the hard job of parenting just a little bit sweeter. Adults, join us at the table and build your family menu to: super-size learning experiences; cook up stories that guide children through family changes, and since variety is the spice of life, we will add a pinch of playful solutions for easing children’s challenging behaviors.

There will be a buffet of learning resources during this unique hands-on workshop that will provide adults with new ideas and activities to blend into their own family play culture. $15 Amazeum member, $20 non-member. Advanced registration and payment required. Parent Cafe is for adults only.

Wine Wednesday GNO Spring Doorhangers Imagine Studios Village on the Creek, Rogers 6:00 - 8:30pm

Friday Fun Night Leprechaun Traps

March 20-24

Spring Break Camps Amazeum Under the Big Top 9am - 3pm Spring break camp is a blast at the Amazeum! Join us for a week-long adventure filled with unconventional hands-on experiences. Age groups: 6-8 years and 9-11 years. $250 Amazeum members/$300 non members*. Come one, come all, and join the Amazeum circus! From jaw-dropping acts to delicious carnival foods, our ringmasters will show you the ropes as you find your place under the big top. Explore the science behind this mysterious world of wonder and discover the imagination, creativity, and STEAM principles used to create a spectacular show. *Advanced registration and payment required.

March 25 CB Babies

Crystal Bridges 10:00 - 11:00am Oh, baby! Join us for this special program for the Museum’s youngest visitors: infants ages 3 to 24 months and a caregiver.

Spend time in the galleries looking at and talking to your baby about art before enjoying sensory playtime. We’ll visit new artwork and make new discoveries together each month!

Make sure you are able to hold your baby or have them in a front carrier;they need to see and physically react to the artworks. This is a time to bond with your baby, so please make other arrangements for any siblings. $10

Create Your Own Little Golden Book Storytime Barnes and Noble, Rogers 11:00am In celebration of the 75th anniversary of Little Golden Book, join us to create your very own Little Golden Book to take home. We will read classic Little Golden Book titles such as The Monster at the End of This Book (Sesame Street Series).

Super Saturday Drive-In Movie Disney's "Cars" 10:30am Walker Community Room at Fayetteville Public Library Create your own cardboard car (or join our workshop on Thursday, March 23rd) and bring it to this "drive-in" movie experience! Special showing of Disney's Cars. Ka-chow! This family event is free and open to the public.

March 31

6th Annual CUPCAKES & COCKTAILS presented by McLarty Daniel!

Fayetteville Town Center 6:30pm Benefiting The Miller McNeil Woodruff Foundation to raise awareness and fund research of Spinal Muscular Atrophy (SMA). We cordially invite you to celebrate the life of Miller McNeil Woodruff. Join us for an evening of DINNER & DRINKS, MUSIC and SILENT & LIVE AUCTIONS. Proceeds benefiting the Miller McNeil Woodruff Foundation. Tickets will be $87 per person (pub tables, standing room only), or $1,000 for a reserved table of 10. CASUAL ATTIRE & MILLER CAPS WELCOME! peekaboonwa.com 37

NORTHWEST ARKANSAS

SP EC TACU LA R SC IE N CE AN D LE AR N IN G School Assemblies & Workshops • Special Events & Camps Corporate/Non-Profit Presentations • Awesome Party Concept

www.super-sci.com • 479-444-0303

38 March 2017

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39

EVAN’S LEGACY W

hen a champion swimmer enjoying a day at the river with his friends and family drowns, what then?

You look for “good.” You do good. You promote good.

It was a beautiful summer afternoon on June 17, 2014. Evan headed out to the Illinois River with a couple of his best friends. His younger brother Owen and I followed, arriving just shortly after.

There was quite a crowd there that day, as the final touches were being made on the Siloam Springs Kayak Park. I posted on Facebook while we were there, took pictures of the boys blowing up tubes to float the river, and rubbed sunscreen on their backs.

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”

Romans 8:28

After watching them swim and play in the rapids for a couple of hours, Evan and the older boys floated downstream to where the water was calm.

That was the last time I heard Evan's voice.

Thirty minutes or so later, I saw the other boys coming up the river, but Evan was not with them.

When I asked them where he was they said they didn't know. I said, “What?!” They explained that they were headed back up the river when Evan mentioned that he had a cramp and just giggled, like he typically would, and when they turned back around they never saw him again. I sent them back down the river to look for him. I tried my best to look for him on the banks of the river, but with the woods so thick it was impossible. I was praying and hoping that he had swam to the side to rest, and that he was okay. The boys returned again without Evan. Still in disbelief that Evan could have drowned, I called my husband and told him we couldn't find Evan. He immediately called 9-1-1, and the search began.

Evan's body was recovered from the river later that evening. There were no signs of entanglement, injury or suspicious behavior. The cause of death was drowning. An incredible swimmer had drowned. My son had drowned.

We don't know the cause of the drowning. I believe that God was ready for Evan to come home. I believe Evan was ready, too. I am so glad I decided to go spend the afternoon with the boys, now knowing that it would be my last day with Evan.

Evan was an adventurer, and a true free spirit, who loved life. He loved to swim. He would get up at 5:30 every morning to swim for the Siloam Springs High School swim team. He was committed to his teammates and coaches. During the summer, he swam for the Siloam Springs Flyers, where he helped coach his younger teammates and formed friendships with swimmers throughout the tristate area. He had recently joined the Razorback Aquatic Club, AquaHawgs.

Evan loved music... to play it, listen to it, create it everything about it. Piano, guitar, and drums were

40 March 2017

his instruments of choice, but most of his time was spent on percussion, as he was very involved in the high school band and youth group band.

Evan loved learning - about everything! Even with his demanding schedule and social life, he was an excellent student. He enjoyed playing basketball, baseball, hunting, fishing, and doing anything outdoors.

Evan loved people. Evan was fun-loving and loved to laugh. He was always the last one to bed (because he might miss something) and loved being where the crowd was. He believed that family and friends were the most important thing.

Evan knew the importance of honesty and being real. He was a friend to so many. He could make a friend with anyone, whether he was at school, rocking a baby in the church nursery, or serving at a nursing home.

Saturday April 8th, 2017

Walton Lifetime Complex Pool John Brown University

SCHEDULE OF EVENTS 8:00 am Swimathon 2:00 pm Water Polo Tournament 2:00 pm Silent Pie Auction Swimathon entry and information forms can be found at www.evanthomasfoundation.com

Evan loved Jesus.

Evan was so endearing and there are so many funny Evan stories. I will laugh and smile for him every day. On the evening of June 17, 2014, standing on the bank of the river, I thought "how will I ever laugh again?" yet, even then, I was able to find a smile at the very thought of him. That night I was able to rest my head knowing that Evan was “home," and I wasn't praying for him like I did every night before. He was perfect now, and nothing could harm him. Now, I had to pray for strength to make it through this life without him present.

Evan is missed by many, but many have been changed because of him - through his life and

Turn the page …

The goal of Evan Thomas Foundation is to: Foster the love of swimming Support swim education programs Promote the sport of swimming Offer hope and help encourage others who have lost loved ones to drowning Support • Hope • Scholarships

www.evanthomasfoundation.com (479)228-4442 evanthomasfoundation@gmail.com peekaboonwa.com

41

EVAN’S LEGACY

The goal of Evan Thomas Foundation is to: • Foster the love of swimming • Support swim education programs • Promote the sport of swimming • Offer hope and help encourage others who have lost loved ones to drowning Currently, the foundation is offering the following scholarships: • Red Cross Lifeguard Certification • Swim Lessons • Membership and Fees for AquaHawgs • Membership and Fees for Siloam Springs Flyers • College and Career Education

42 March 2017

through his death. Through Evan's love and dedication, his family and friends will continue to carry on his name.

Evan's favorite Bible verse, Romans 8:28, has been my lifeline. God proved himself faithful even while we were gathered at the river waiting for the search and rescue team to find Evan. He does use "all things for good" if we allow our hearts to be open. I know God didn't cause this pain in my life, but I believe he has and will continue to use it for good.

On June 17, 2015, the one-year anniversary of Evan's death, family and friends gathered to celebrate Evan’s life and establish the Evan Thomas Foundation. The foundation expands Evan’s legacy by partnering with established organizations and providing scholarships for their related activities. There are several events throughout the year to celebrate Evan's life and raise awareness about the Foundation. On April 8, the Foundation will be hosting it’s second annual Pies & Polo: Evan’s Birthday Splash Bash. This fun filled day will consist of a swimathon, water polo tournament and silent pie auction. Evan would be turning 19 years old on March 23 this year, so we will gather to celebrate his life and raise funds for the Foundation.

More information and registration forms are available on the Foundation's website www.evanthomasfoundation.com

Camps 1009 MUSEUM WAY • BENTONVILLE, AR AMAZEUM.ORG • 479-696-9280

Spend your Spring Break and Summer with your friends at the Scott Family Amazeum. Registration is now open!

Spring Break Under the Big Top March 20-24 6-11 years

3D Animaker (In partnership with New Design School)

July 17-21 12-16 years Girls STEAM: Dream Big (girls only) July 24-28 6-11 years

Summer Sweet Science June 12-16 6-11 years

Superhero Academy July 31-August 4 6-11 years

Imaginate & Create (In partnership with Crystal Bridges. Crystal Bridges summer camps are sponsored by Nice-Pak Products.)

For complete information, visit amazeum.org and choose Camps from the Events and Programs tab.

Pre-registration and payment is required. Members receive a discount on camp registration.

June 19-23 6-12 years ARK-eology June 26-30 6-11 years Gadgets & Gizmos July 10-14 6-11 years

Amazeum camps presented by

Animaker July 17-21 9-11 years

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44 March 2017

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Parents Left Behind Bereaved Parent Seminar

S

By Dr. Susan Averitt

ometimes, when I sit in a big group of people-like in church--I feel so alone. Despite the crowd of familiar and unfamiliar faces all around, I feel like I don’t belong. I felt this way all the time after I lost Cameron 11 years ago. I couldn’t relate to normal people anymore. My loss was too big and my heart was too broken to connect to the greater community around me.

I don’t feel that way all the time anymore. In fact, I feel it less and less. I think I’m starting to get myself back. Wow... it only took a decade. I can relate to people who haven’t endured my loss because people have such big hearts and share so much love with me. I have learned that people are, for the most part, truly compassionate and empathic.

I love people. So, I am glad I’m connecting again.

As a Parent Left Behind, I wouldn’t wish for anyone who hasn’t lost a child to understand

my pain. I know that unless someone has been through this, there really is no way to comprehend the completeness of that loss. It reshapes and takes over every aspect of the bereaved parent’s life. There is no getting over it, because you can’t erase it. It stays forever, and it becomes a big part of everything that you are. There is no healing because you can’t get well from what ails you.

You just simply learn to survive and live again in a world that is vastly different from the one you once knew. It’s that simple. It’s that complicated.

It’s the paradox of life in a world in which the most excruciatingly painful thing that we can imagine has happened and yet we are still here to live on.

We don’t do it because we chose it. We do it because we don’t have a choice.

I have been blessed with the gift of time. Time did not heal me, make no mistake. But time allowed the tight grip of immense grief to loosen its hold on me. I have made progress I didn’t think was possible. I can sit in a crowded room of people and not feel disconnected most of the time. I can join the voices that sing and praise without feeling like an outsider looking in on my own life. But I will never forget the days when I couldn’t. I will always know the inconceivable pain of being a Parent Left Behind. And I want to wrap my arms around any other parent who has lost a child and silently shout “You are not alone!”

In 2014 and 2015, a small group of us put on a seminar in Northwest Arkansas for other bereaved parents. It was hard. It was awful. It was beautiful.

It was good. About 100 people came to each seminar and I realized what I already knew, that bereaved parents need each other. They need to sit in a room filled with familiar and unfamiliar faces and know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that they are not alone.

They need to meet and talk with other bereaved parents, share their stories, encourage each other.

They need to celebrate their lost loved ones, identify their weaknesses, and find their strengths.

The 2017 Parents Left Behind Seminar will take place on April 8th from 8:00 am -12:30 pm at Central United Methodist Church in Rogers.

If you know anyone who has lost a child—old or young, born or unborn, yesterday or 20 years

46 March 2017

ago—please make them aware of this event. If that lonely mom needs to be at this seminar, then I want her to know about it. If that dad feels lost and empty, I want him to feel welcome with us. For anyone who loves a bereaved parent and just doesn’t know how to help, I want you to come be a part of what we are doing. We are supporting bereaved parents on their lifelong journey of grief following the death of a child.

And we do it because someone did it for us— held us up when we couldn’t walk, prayed for us when we couldn’t pray, hoped for us when we couldn’t hope. We do it to help remember Cameron and the other precious children who left too soon. We do it because we care and because we have hope for all those that have lost a child. Hope that tomorrow will be a better day and that you always feel loved. Hope that you know you are not alone.

Check out www.ParentsLeftBehindAR.com to learn more about our organization and register for our event on April 8th. The seminar is free of cost to participants. Click on 'Register for An Event' and we will see you there!

Love…Remember…Hope!

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Cerebral Pal sy Awareness Month

We asked FHS Freshman Hunter Joyce to offer his thoughts on Cerebral Palsy (CP) Awareness Month...

This is what he shared.

"When I was in elementary school I was asked if I felt different than the other students.

I said, Yes, I have a sense of humor.

You may just see a kid in a wheelchair, a kid who can't speak, a kid you think can't learn.

But we are so much more."

My new wheels at Ch

ildren's Therapy TEAM

Zion National Park in 2016

March is CP Awareness Month March 25th is National CP Awareness Day

48 March 2017

Aquatics with OT Cara Duren.

in 2015.

NWA’s

ONLY

91o Warm Water Pediatric

Therapy Pools

Call 521-TEAM or visit ChildrensTherapyTEAM.com

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DAD'S VIEW

WITH BEN LACY

say the pen is mightier than the sword. I say Tthishey either is probably a poor choice of weaponry in day and age, but... best of luck.

Seriously though, the pen, or keyboard in this case, is a mighty thing, and writing this article does

occasionally inflate the head of this Dad’s View author. It’s really a fun and interesting opportunity to tell you all a little about the 'Lacy Family Lunacy' and hopefully you can relate. The best parts are the one-way communication and complete lack of accountability! I mean, you can’t really respond to me unless you Facebook stalk me, and if you’ve previously read any of these articles you know my social networking skills are just slightly above two tin cans and a string so... again, best of luck.

But anyway, having the proverbial pen is powerful, as it allows me the ability to only tell you the stuff I want you to know. You know, the stuff that makes me look good and all, and warrants the self-purchase of a #1 Dad t-shirt and matching coffee mug (just kidding). But that’s not the truth-honestly, my parenting mistakes outweigh my majestic moments; and so begins our story.

50 March 2017

Kid #1, female, newly minted 16-year-old went to get her learner’s permit last year. Yes, that in itself is enough to give me night tremors, but wait, there’s more! As you know, part of the license procedure is to have your eyes checked using the same gigantic goofy gadget they used in the 60’s.

My daughter looked into the machine as the test taker instructed her to “read the top row.” “There’s nothing on the screen” responded my daughter.

Here’s the proud parenting moment. She’s freakin’ blind as a star-nosed mole (bet you thought I was going to say bat, didn’t you?)! She could not see any letters; just a blank white screen! The DMV associate, always such nice folks, gave me a cold hard stare that temporarily froze my soul. Okay, so let’s get out of here, grab a TCBY and visit the optometrist! Lesson learned, right?

Middle child / Male / Age 13. Just months after the DMV debacle, we noticed he was having some trouble in school. Grades not what they used to be; not at all interested in reading. But hey, he’s a junior high boy. What do you expect? Certainly couldn’t be an issue with his vision. Just need to ride him harder and make sure he’s “focused”, right? Wrong.

Checked him out; blind as a cave beetle (thought bat was coming this time too?). He had some hilarious, but sad commentary the first time he rocked his specs. “Dad, I can see the other end of the basketball court!” “Wow, I never knew there were individual leaves on trees; just thought they were all bunched together!” Ouch; those hurt. So, after two visually challenged children, surely I would be on the lookout for any warning signs with the youngest sibling?

Nope.

3rd child, an active 4th grader with a fondness for reading. Toward the end of fall he started reading less. Chalk it up to getting older and it not being “cool” to read; more fun to play video games.

Noticed the pile of library books on the coffee table collecting dust instead of being ever-changing.

Homework wasn’t done immediately upon arrival home. It sat and sometimes was done on the way out the door to school. You know what’s coming…. note from the school nurse, “Hey your kid failed his eye exam; ever had him checked?” Are you kidding me? Unfortunately, no; the baby of the family is as blind as a Salem crayfish (no bats for you, but I did give you some great Family Feud answers).

So, as an attentive parent, I swung and missed not once, not twice, but three times. The unholy trifecta, the anti-hat trick. It’s not like there were any warning signs, you know. I mean, even though my years are quickly piling up my eyes are still 20/20-ish? Oh, did I forget to mention that my wife’s eyesight is on par with Mr. Magoo?

That might have been a bit of a red flag. But even though my vision is stellar, I was, as the saying goes, like a blind man in a dark room looking for a black cat that isn’t there. Often as a dad my focus is on everything except the obvious; always looking for something odd, something strange, something with a fancy new label.

In reality, most of the time when kids have an issue it’s just the same old things my parents had with me, and theirs with them, and yadda, yadda, yadda. It’s nothing cataclysmic, despite what you read on WebMD (for the love of Pete, do not visit that site). You know, can’t see the forest because of the trees. And let’s face it; there are a whole lot of trees out there now. So I’m returning my matching #1 Dad t-shirt and coffee mug, and hoping to see a little more clearly next time.

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MARK YOUR CALENDARS! PEEKABOO MAGAZINE KIDSFEST AT BFF

DOWNTOWN BENTONVILLE

Saturday, May 6th from 10-2 WHERE THE KIDS OF THE COMMUNITY TAKE CENTER STAGE! Bounce Houses, Obstacle Course, Mechanical Bull Riding by 16:9 Entertainment Petting Zoo and Pony Rides with Farmland Adventure Arcade Games and Activities from Fast Lane Entertainment Arts and Craft Projects with Imagine Studios Tumbling and fun with The Little Gym And many more!!

To be a part of KidsFest email editor@peekaboonwa.com

CHILDCARE • PRESCHOOL • LEARNING ACADEMY To be a part of our monthly guide to childcare email editor@peekaboonwa.com

54 March 2017

BENTONVILLE

“I BUILT A CIRCUIT BOARD A

casacastillo

As Evie’s eyes twinkle and she gives a big thumbs up, she can tell you why SHE LOVES SCHOOL.

Evie’s school day in prekindergarten may begin with

CASA CASTILLO 2000 East Central, Suite 1 in the tinkering studio.

(479) 640-4925 “We get to build stuff, and we BUILT A CIRCUIT casacastillo.net CasaAnd Castillo isevery a day!”

Spanish BOARD! we go to Art Studio Language Immersion Center With a curriculum focused on science, and Suzuki Music School. technology, engineering, arts and We are a childcare center, mathematics (STEAM), our students learn preschool, music school, from integration of these dynamic areas at and offerafter ansearly c age.h o o l programs Our low student, teacherfor ratio and caring older children. faculty help students look at the world We are a family in a new way. owned care center and See whatare The New School we dedicated experience can mean your to providing forchild your child.with the absolute Schedule a tour today by best calling care available.

479-521-7037 or visit singing in music, creating art and end with creating

HAPPY KIDS LEARNING ACADEMY 301 SE 28th Street (479) 464-8686 abchappykids.com Our Learning Academy offers a wide range of programs fora variety of ages - from infants to toddlers, and two year olds to preschoolers. Our curriculum is tailored to each age group and is based on sound child developmental principles regarding how children ideally grow and learn.

Mary's Little Lamb's Preschool

thenewschool.org.

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NORTHWEST ARKANSAS’ PREMIER INDEPENDENT SCHOOL SERVING PRESCHOOL THROUGH GRADE 9

MARY'S LITTLE LAMB 506 SE Moberly Ln Ste 6 (479) 273-1011 mllpreschool.com Mary’s Little Lambs Preschool is a licensed private preschool early education program dedicated to serve our community and provide quality care and education for children of all ethnic, religious, social, and developmental backgrounds.

We offer early e d u c a t i o n a l experiences in a safe, inspiring, and nurturing environment that will help children to reach their fullest potential.

The New School is an independent school that respects, embraces, and celeb

staff. TheNEW New School does not discriminate on the basis of race, religion, ge THE SCHOOL origin in the admission of students, in hiring, or in the adminis 2514 N New School Pl (479) 521-7037 thenewschool.org A coeducational, independent school serving students from toddler age through grade nine. The school community is dedicated to inspiring a love of learning and empowering students to reach their potential for academic achievement, creativity and citizenship. With a low student-to-faculty ratio, our students are known and cared for by an excellent faculty in an encouraging atmosphere.

ROGERS

HAPPY KIDS LEARNING ACADEMY Central Rogers Academy 2808 W. Walnut St (479) 621-6126 North Rogers Academy 2204 N. 12th St (479) 202-5691 abchappykids.com Our Learning Academy offers a wide range of programs fora variety of ages - from infants to toddlers, and two year olds to preschoolers. Our curriculum is tailored to each age group and is based on sound child developmental principles regarding how children ideally grow and learn.

IBC GO CENTER PRESCHOOL 2555 S. 26th Street 479-636-1230 preschool@ibcgocenter.com Immanuel Baptist Church Global Outreach Center invites your child to come learn and grow at our preschool! We strive to help each child achieve through outstanding, Christian based curriculum and interactive learning!

Enrolling Now-classes available for 3-5 yrs!

SILOAM SPRINGS FIRST BAPTIST CHRISTIAN SCHOOL 3364 W. Pleasant Grove Rd. Rogers (479) 878-1052 fbcchristianschool.org Offering Preschool through Middle School grade offerings with a mission to pursue academic excellence while growing in the grace of God's Word so that we may engage our community with the saving knowledge of Jesus Christ. and grade school – and into awesome grown-ups LOWELL

FRIENDSHIP PEDIATRIC SERVICES 212 South Lincoln Street (479)770-0744 fccare.org Developmental Preschool: Friendship Community Care’s Developmental Preschools are learning hubs for children aged six weeks to five years with developmental disabilities or delays + children who qualify for the Arkansas Better Chance program. FCC prepares children for success in integrated and therapeutic classroom settings, so that they have the skills they need to continue growing with strength and independence throughout Kindergarten and grade school – and into awesome grown-ups

FRIENDSHIP COMMUNITY CARE 918 South Mount Olive (479)524-2456 fccare.org Developmental Preschool: Friendship Community Care’s Developmental Preschools are learning hubs for children aged six weeks to five years with developmental disabilities or delays + children who qualify for the Arkansas B e t t e r Chance program.

FCC prepares c h i l d r e n for success in integrated and therapeutic classroom settings, so that they have the skills they need to continue growing with strength and independence throughout Kindergarten and grade school – and into awesome grown-ups.

OUR LIST YSS HERE! NE BUSI

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56 March 2017

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How to be a full-time parent on a part-time schedule, post-divorce

BY DWAIN HEBDA

Nothing about divorce is easy -- for either party -- between the expense, the emotional turmoil and the disruption of routine that marks the beginning of your new normal. Add children and parenting responsibilities into the mix and the situation gets even more complicated.

Parents learning to cope with the realities of shared legal and physical custody issues, often still hurting from how the marriage ended, need to work hard to keep proper perspective, said Katherine Rogers, a family counselor based in Bentonville.

keeping the children in a home and routine that’s familiar to them. Fathers who don’t have primary physical custody of their children can often struggle to recreate the home environment in their new place of residence.

“Most of the time there's some sore feelings, hurt feelings in both parties,” she said. “But regardless of the parents’ relationship, they have to focus their efforts. When it comes to communication, to keep it from going sour, base it solely on the child or children, and that's it. Keep it simple.”

On the other hand, the parent with secondary physical custody -- more often, fathers -- can sometimes be seen as a refuge from the rules of the primary household. Both of these perceptions can generate resentment in one or the other parent, on top of whatever lingering animosity might exist over the divorce itself.

Shared custody is an important conduit by which both parents continue to maintain regular contact with their child. Recent studies have shown such contact is a powerful salve for the child to process and overcome their parents going their separate ways.

“Research from the last couple of decades shows that it's not the fact that the two parents live in different homes that makes the divorce difficult for the kids,” said Rachel Pinto, clinical director of the North Little Rock office of Chenal Family Therapy. “We've actually found that for the parents who can make the divorce workable and who provide stability and security for the children, those children, whether they have one home or two homes, actually turn out just as well as kids who are from a nuclear family situation.”

While both parents share the responsibility for this, each side often faces very different challenges.

Statistics have long shown that mothers gain custody of children in divorce at a much higher rate than fathers, and so may have the advantage of 58 March 2017

“It's really hard because you will be, for the rest of your life, sitting across the table from someone who you have decided you cannot live with anymore and yet you have a partnership with them on the investment in your life that means the absolute most to you,” Pinto said. “Here's this person that really, honestly, you’re divorcing for a reason, and at the same time this third person or however many children you have together, who are the people you care about the most in the world.”

Rogers said as difficult as it may be, the first step toward a productive, healthy co-parenting relationship lies in a divorced couple’s ability to put their personal feelings aside, and keep them there, for the sake of their children. In fact, it’s her first cardinal rule for divorced couples.

“Never speak foully of the other party in front of the child,” she said. “You've got to be really careful about that because children hear phone calls, they read text messages, their senses are very keen at this point. So you never, ever speak foully of the other.”

Rogers also suggested learning how to pick one’s battles when it comes to differences in parenting styles and house rules. Understanding what’s serious and what’s just a personal irritant can help keep things civil between the adults.

“Each parent is going to have to pick and choose their battles wisely,” she said. “If you see legitimate concern--we're talking the child being in danger here--you’re going to have to weigh in at that point. But, if we're talking about going to a bar-b-q at some friend's house and staying out till 11:00 at night, that’s something else.”

Non-primary custodial parents should also not feel pressure to go out of their way to entertain the kids when spending time with them. While it’s fine to take in a movie, go to the zoo or other recreation that all families enjoy now and again, trying to jam the visit full of activities is exhausting and largely misses the point of the time together.

“It’s a very male way of looking at things, and I'm not making fun of it, but I think there are a lot of dads who are like, ‘What's the purpose of this?’ and ‘What are we going to do during a visit? How am I going to make this the best?’” Pinto said.

“What I can say to that is the number one complaint that I hear (from young patients) is ‘I

just wanted him to sit with me and chill out, but instead he pulled me out of bed at 8:00 a.m. on Saturday and we didn't get home until 10:00 p.m.’

“You want to do fun stuff like every parent wants to do fun stuff. Everyone wants to have fun with their kid and everyone wants more time with their kid, even the person who has them 70 percent of the time. So, yeah, plan some stuff, but make sure that you keep the focus on making sure your kid knows that you are happy they're there and that you're interested in them, you're curious about them, you want to know what's going on with them.”

Rogers said a number of factors can upset this delicate relationship, including when one or both the adults move into new relationships and blended families. She recommends taking extra steps to help maintain routine in these situations.

“Consistency and routine is best for any child, I don't care who you're talking about,” she said.

“Even in new situations or when they're going back and forth from different homes, you can provide consistency by giving that child their own space, their own routine as much as possible. Not giving them that sacred space and routine to follow could lead to some major problems.”

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60 March 2017

Math & Language Therapy

Academic

READING • SPELLING HANDWRITING • MATH GRAMMAR

Multisensory Language Therapy “Take Flight” , a comprehensive intervention for students with dyslexia based on OrtonGillingham concepts.

Reading • Spelling • Handwriting • Phonics Vocabulary • Fluency • Comprehension (classes available) Pre-Flight (Phonological Awareness) Multisensory Math • Counting and Numeration • Addition & Subtraction facts for instant recall • Multiplication & Division facts for instant recall • Fractions • Decimals & Percents • Integers & Algebra I & II Multisensory Grammar • Parts of Speech, Capitals, Punctuation …

Verbal to Written Expression (thoughts on paper) Writing Treatment for Hyperlexia (can read, but does not understand what is read) Study Skills • Time Management • Notetaking • Memory Technique • Test Taking Strategies …

Visit us at www.amltherpy.com or call 479-253-3256

Bentley

Greeter

104 North 37th Street Suite B Rogers, AR 72756

Karen Sykes — Certified Academic Language Therapist (CALT) 29 years experience teaching

Lisa Lundeen — CALT, 6 years experience in Social Work, 6 years experience teaching

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ways a blessing

Deserving, Enriched & Blessed The D.E.B. an outreach Mail:Project 1140 NisWalton Blvd program andBella thriftVista, storeArkansas boutique with a heart479-544-9397 to help every child in Phone: needEmail: with clothing essentials. s.laney479@sbcglobal.net OurWebsite: mission is to filldebproject.com the unmet gap in clothing needs to children who are victims of either disasters, economic Facebook: DEBproject distress or are entering the foster care system. The Instagram: DEB_PROJECT Organization strives to honor these requests with dignity and grace.

How Can You Help?

We could not do what we do without the generous assistance from our community. If you would like to get involved, here’s how you can help provide clothing to deserving children in need: • We accept gently used or new clothing • Your time is a wonderful donation • Financial donations are always a blessing “What a strange power there is in clothing.”

Isaac Bashevis

Phone Email Websit Facebook Instagram

479-544-9397 s.laney479@sbcglobal.net debproject.com DEBproject DEB_PROJECT

1140 N Walton Blvd., Bella Vista, Arkansas

4010 Miner Court ale For S

to

Overwhelmed Mom to In Control Mom

I A COLUMN FOR MOMS, BY MOMS, AND FOR THE LOVE OF MOMS

By Meagan Ruffing Hi! Welcome to my column “Mom to Mom” where all moms are welcome. Each month I will share real life stories from my own every day parenting struggles as well as stories from other moms in the community who face certain challenges. Join me, as we share our less than glamorous motherhood moments so there may be one less lonely mom out there.

If you have a Mom to Mom story you would like to share with Peekaboo readers, email me at ruffingmeagan@gmail.com.

64 March 2017

f you are a mom, than you know the word “overwhelmed” goes hand-in-hand with the role of raising little ones. Whether you’re a first-time parent or a parent of multiples, the life you had before kids looks a lot different than the one you’re living now.

When I first became a mom, I struggled with finding balance. Balance between who I wanted to be and what I thought a mother was supposed to be. It didn’t help that my first born had severe acid reflux, colic, and a benign developmental delay in walking. Parenthood just wasn’t how I’d imagined it to be, and the reality of this seeped into every crevice of my life.

Fast-forward eight years, two more kids, and a mom who is a little bit wiser than she once was, I am here to tell you there is hope for you moms out there who feel overwhelmed. The first step is taking a deep breath, grabbing a pen (or the nearest crayon) and writing down what it is that is making you feel overwhelmed. Follow these steps below and you will be well on your way to going from overwhelmed to in control.

Once you have written down what it is that is overwhelming you (kids, lack of sleep, marriage, overeating, weight, and so on), you can begin to tackle the very thing that has been causing you so much stress.

Ask yourself, “Why is this overwhelming me?”

If it’s your weight that is bothering you, the reason might be something like, “My clothes don’t feel good on me. I can’t seem to stop snacking, etc.) Once you pin point why this overwhelming situation is making you frazzled, you can begin to take back control. State it for what it is and move on.

Write down your next small step. Literally, what is the next small step you can take in going from overwhelmed to in control? If it’s a rocky marriage that has your stomach in a ball of knots, maybe scheduling an appointment with a therapist is your next small step. It’s actually a big step but in the bigger picture, it’s one small step in taking control.

Decide how big of an issue this is. Is it an immediate problem? A problem that can wait a few weeks? Or maybe it’s something that can wait several months? Whatever your overwhelming situation is, decide where it falls on the urgency list and treat it as so. An example of each one of these might be:

Becoming a mom is tough stuff. It’s great stuff but it’s tough stuff. Who you once were will come through again, you just have to be diligent and intentional about letting her peek through from time-to-time. Give yourself a break and a pat on the back for bringing this amazing child into the world and acknowledge things for what they are; tough. You will get through this and you will come out stronger from this. Your days of not showering and forgetting to eat will become a thing of the past before you can say, “I can’t believe he’s 8 years old! Where did the time go?” “ In her poignant new book, I See You, author Meagan Ruffing pulls back the heavy curtain of secrecy and sha me to show us a gritty side of parenting that many of us know little about (but should), and that many others will find all too fa miliar. ” Dr. Jodi Detrick ~ Writer, Speaker, Coach Author of The Jesus-Hearted Woman

In I See You, Meagan Ruffing offers practical tips and gentle encouragement to overwhelmed moms everywhere. This book is for those who suffer from postpartum depression, challenges in their marriage, who have a strong-willed child, a child with special needs, or for the mom who wonders if she can do it all. Meagan shares her personal testimony and heartache the comes with the lonely journey of finding a way through a child’s diagnosis, treatment, and the difficulties of day-to-day living when “perfection” didn’t happen.

With worksheets, scripture, and detailed lists, this book is for every mom who wants to be the best version of herself but doesn’t know where to begin. I See You will provide the support parents need to go from overwhelmed to in control.

Meagan Ruffing is a parenting journalist who loves helping and encouraging moms to go from overwhelmed to in control. She enjoys meeting moms right where they’re at in their parenting journey and coaching them one-on-one or in a group setting to work through personal challenges and life-long goals. Meagan writes about what she knows and with three kids of her own, she knows that parenting is tough stuff. Through her writing, she shares what works for her and her family in dozens of regional parenting publications across the United States and in Canada.

You can see Meagan’s work in magazines such as Calgary’s Child, North State Parent, Peekaboo, Connection, and many more. When Meagan’s not writing, you can find her with her Mothers’ of Preschoolers (MOPS) groups where she is a ministry $15.99 USD coach for MOPS International. Visit her at http:// www.meaganruffing.com/ and sign up for her free parenting newsletter where you will find fun tips, links to her articles, information about speaking events, and encouraging words to get you through your day.

MEAGAN RUFFING

Meagan Ruffing is in the business of helping moms go from overwhelmed to in control. She believes in creating an environment where moms are free from judgement so there will be one less lonely mom out there. You can read more about her movement at www.meaganruffing.com and in her new book, “I See You: Helping Moms Go from Overwhelmed to In Control.”

HELPING MOMS GO FROM OVERWHELMED TO IN CONTROL

Everyone dreams of the perfect family—the one with the spouse, the 2.5 kids, the dog and the cat, with a house in the suburbs. But life is never perfection, and sometimes what is tossed your way can be difficult and exhausting. How do you cope with the loneliness, the isolation, the marriage difficulties, or the questions you ask yourself over and over again—the whys, the what ifs? How do you build a life that works for you and your child, that honors both of you as well as the rest of the family?

I S E E YO U

Baby not sleeping = Urgent.

Want to lose weight = over the next several weeks.

Get my house back in order = Not Urgent but something I will work on over the next few months.

Have an accountability friend. This is key.

Find someone who you can trust and who will hold you accountable. This might be your spouse, your closest friend, or your neighbor. You might have different accountability people for different situations in your life and that’s okay. That is normal. Once you have decided and pinpointed what it is that is overwhelming you, and you have figured out what your next small step will be, go ahead and tell someone what your action plan is.

HELPING MOMS GO FROM OVERWHELMED TO IN CONTROL

a InsiDe

ETS HELPFUL WORKSHE & SCRIPTURE CARDS

MEAGAN RUFFING

Photo courtesy of Lazer Lee Photography Cover design by Meagan Ruffing and Veronica Zucca

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Every child deserves one of these:

Even the 559 foster children in Northwest Arkansas in one of 188 homes.

Contact us to learn how you can help 479.418.1314

/nwacall ™

nwa@thecallinarkansas.org thecallinarkansas.org/nwa save the date!

10.10.17 Horton farms

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At a

Glance ARTS and MUSIC

Amazeum (Pg. 31, 43) (479) 696-9280 Crystal Bridges (Pg. 13) (479) 418-5700 crystalbridges.org Imagine Studios (Pg. 33) (479) 619-6085 Trike Theatre (Pg. 45) (479) 464-5084 triketheatre.org Walton Arts Center (Pg. 23) waltonartscenter.org

BANKS First Security (Pg. 12) www.fsbank.com; www.onlyinark.com

CHILDCARE/NANNY SERVICES ABC Happy Kids Learning Academy (Pg. 65) (479) 202-5691 abchappykids.com Better Beginnings (Pg. 15) (800) 445-3316 arbetterbeginnings.com Casa Castillo (Pg. 70) (479) 640-4925 Mary’s Little Lambs Preschool (Pg. 38) (479) 273-1011

CHURCH First Baptist Church Rogers (Pg. 56) fbcrogers.org

CLOTHING Deal Depot (Pg. 51) (479) 750-DEAL DEB Project (Pg. 62) (479) 544-9397 Oh Baby Boutique (Pg. 69) (479) 254-2911 www.ohbabynwa.com

DENTIST My Village Ped Dentistry and Orthodontics myvillagesmiles.com (Pg. 45) Pediatric Dental Associates (Pg. 57) (479) 582-0600 Smile Shoppe Pediatric Dentistry (Pg. 26) (479) 631-6377 Rogers

DERMATOLOGY / SKIN CARE Advanced Dermatology / Skin Care Center (479) 268-3555 (Pg. 42) Lips & Lines (Pg. 17) (479) 330-1201 NWA Center for Plastic Surgery (Pg. 2) (479) 571-3100 nwacenterforplasticsurgery.com

EDUCATION/TRAINING

Academic Math & Language Therapy (Pg. 61) (479) 253-3256 First Baptist Christian School (Pg. 56) FBCChristianSchool.com The New School (Pg. 34) thenewschool.org (479) 521-7037 Super Science (Pg. 38) (479) 444-0303 www.super-sci.com

FAMILY FUN / ENTERTAINMENT Crystal Bridges (Pg. 13) (479) 418-5700 Fast Lane Entertainment (Pg. 4) (479) 659-0999 www.fastlanebowl.com Girl Scouts (Pg. 64) (800) 632-6894 New Life Ranch (Pg. 57) NewLifeRanch.com Starlight Skatium (Pg. 60) (479) 444-STAR Super Science (Pg. 38) (479) 444-0303 www.super-sci.com

FITNESS/SPORTS ATA (Pg. 52) Bentonville: (479) 273-1212 Fayetteville: (479) 443-5425

To advertise and become a part of the Peekaboo Family email: editor@peekaboonwa.com

FOOD / DRINK TCBY (Pg. 3) (479) 636-8229 (TCBY)

HEALTH AND WELLNESS Best Start (Pg. 21) (479) 575-9359 Children's Therapy TEAM (Pg. 49) ChildrensTherapyTEAM.com Friendship Pediatric Services (Pg. 67) fccare.org Northwest Primary Care (Pg. 8-9) nw-physicians.com SoapWare DC (Pg. 59) (800) 455-7627 Tate HealthCare (Pg. 46, 50 ) (479) 271-6511 www.tatehealthcare.com Touch Therapeutic Massage (Pg. 44 ) www.touchtmbyflor.com

JEWELRY AND GIFTS David Adams (Pg. 22) davidadams.com (479) 444-7778 Oh Baby Boutique (Pg. 69) (479) 254-2911 www.ohbabynwa.com

LEARNING CENTER Academic Math and Language Therapy (Pg. 61) (479) 253-3256 www.amltherapy.com ABC Happy Kids Learning Academy (Pg. 65) (479) 202-5691 abchappykids.com Larson's Language Center (Pg. 68) (479) 633-9900 Lexicon (Pg. 18) lexiconnwa.com Mary’s Little Lamb Preschool (Pg. 38) (479) 273-1011

MARTIAL ARTS ATA (Pg. 52) Bentonville: (479) 273-1212 Fayetteville: (479) 443-5425

PEDIATRICIAN Bentonville Pediatrics (Pg. 71) (479) 273-5437 Living Tree Pediatrics (Pg. 39) (479) 282-2966 Northwest Pediatric Convenient Care (Pg. 7) (479) 751-2522 NWA Pediatrics (Pg. 35) nwapediatrics.com Ozark Pediatrics (Pg. 60) (479) 544-9432

REAL ESTATE Homes by Jonathon (Pg. 63) (479) 586-3890 www.homesbyjonathon.com Limbird Real Estate Group (Pg. 63) (479) 799-8929

THERAPY Academic Math and Language Therapy (Pg. 61) (479) 253-3256 www.amltherapy.com Children's Therapy T.E.A.M. (Pg. 49) (479) 521-TEAM Friendship Pediatric Services (Pg. 67) (479) 524-2456

WOMEN'S HEALTH Baby Face & More (Pg. 47) (479) 270-7391 Lifespring (Pg. 17) (479) 271-0005 Parkhill (Pg. 47) Parkhillclinic.com Siloam Springs Women's Center (Pg. 11) (479) 524-9312 Willow Creek (Pg. 5) NW-physicians.com Women's Health Associates (Pg. 19) whanwa.com

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