Philadelphia City Paper, September 1st, 2011 by Philadelphia City Paper

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FOOD | Good grades for a.kitchen

NEWS | Inside Ackerman’s message machine MOVIES | The Debt deal

30 YEARS OF INDEPENDENT JOURNALISM

Sept. 1 - Sept. 7, 2011 #1370 |

www.citypaper.net

COVERAGE STARTS ON P. 12

Elephant Room: Daryl Hannah, Louie Magic and Dennis Diamond

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Bonjour !

We made this

Publisher Nancy Stuski Editor in Chief Theresa Everline Senior Editor Patrick Rapa News Editor Isaiah Thompson Associate Editor and Web Editor Drew Lazor Arts & Movies Editor/Copy Chief Carolyn Huckabay Associate Editor Josh Middleton Staff Writer Daniel Denvir Assistant Copy Editor Carolyn Wyman Contributors Sam Adams, A.D. Amorosi, Janet Anderson, Rodney Anonymous, Mary Armstrong, Nancy Armstrong, Justin Bauer, Shaun Brady, Peter Burwasser, Anthony Campisi, Mark Cofta, Felicia Dâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;Ambrosio, Jesse Delaney, Adam Erace, M.J. Fine, David Anthony Fox, Cindy Fuchs, K. Ross Hoffman, Deni Kasrel, Gary M. Kramer, Gair â&#x20AC;&#x153;Dev 79â&#x20AC;? Marking, Robert McCormick, Andrew Milner, Michael Pelusi, Nathaniel Popkin, Robin Rice, Lee Stabert, Andrew Thompson, Tom Tomorrow, Char Vandermeer, John Vettese, Bruce Walsh, Julia West Editorial Interns Megan Augustin, Matt Cantor, Ryan Carey, Jessica Leung, Esther Martin, Cassie Owens, Massimo Pulcini, Nicole Rossi, Brian Wilensky Associate Web Editor/Staff Photographer Neal Santos Production Director Michael Polimeno Editorial Art Director Reseca Peskin Senior Editorial Designer Alyssa Grenning Senior Designer Evan M. Lopez Designer Alicia Solsman Contributing Photographers Jessica Kourkounis, Mark Stehle Contributing Illustrators Jonathan Bartlett, Ryan Casey Don Haring Jr., Joel Kimmel, Thomas Pitilli, Matthew Smith Human Resources Ron Scully (ext. 210) Accounts Receivable Coordinator Tricia Bradley (ext. 232) Circulation Director Mark Burkert (ext. 239) Advertising Director Eileen Pursley (ext. 257) Senior Account Managers Nick Cavanaugh (ext. 260) Kevin Gallagher (ext. 250), Sharon MacWilliams (ext. 262), Stephan Sitzai (ext. 258) Account Managers Sara Carano (ext. 228), Chris Scartelli (ext. 215), Donald Snyder (ext. 213) Business Development Manager Nicholas Forte (ext. 237) Office Coordinator/Adult Advertising Sales Alexis Pierce (ext. 234) Founder & Editor Emeritus Bruce Schimmel citypaper.net 123 Chestnut Street, Third Floor, Phila., PA 19106. 215-735-8444, Tip Line 215-7358444 ext. 241, Letters to the Editor editorial@citypaper.net, Listings Fax 215-8751800, Classified Ads 215-248-CITY, Advertising Fax 215-735-8535, Subscriptions 215-735-8444 ext. 235 Philadelphia City Paper is published and distributed every Thursday in Philadelphia, Montgomery, Chester, Bucks & Delaware Counties, in South Jersey and in Northern Delaware. Philadelphia City Paper is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. Additional copies may be purchased from our main office at $1 per copy. No person may, without prior written permission from Philadelphia City Paper, take more than one copy of each issue. Pennsylvania law prohibits any person from inserting printed material of any kind into any newspaper without the consent of the owner or publisher. Contents copyright ÂŠ 2011, Philadelphia City Paper. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced without written permission from the publisher. Philadelphia City Paper assumes no obligation (other than cancellation of charges for actual space occupied) for accidental errors in advertising, but will be glad to furnish a signed letter to the buying public.

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2011

contents Setting the stage

Naked City ...................................................................................6 Cover Story ..............................................................................12 Movie Shorts ...........................................................................28 The Agenda ..............................................................................32 Food & Drink ...........................................................................41 COVER PHOTOGRAPH BY NEAL SANTOS PHOTO ILLUSTRATION BY EVAN M. LOPEZ DESIGN BY RESECA PESKIN

the naked city

SEPTEMBER 23 RD

GATES AT 2:30PM

THE SHINS • CAGE THE ELEPHANT PANDA BEAR • ELBOW • THE HOLD STEADY

THE PAINS OF BEING PURE AT HEART • THE JOY FORMIDABLE

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FRIDAY

COMPANY OF THIEVES • DALE EARNHARDT JR. JR. • YUCK MINIATURE TIGERS • DEAD CONFEDERATE SATURDAY

SEPTEMBER 24 TH

GATES AT 10:30AM

PRETTY LIGHTS • GIRL TALK

FOSTER THE PEOPLE • RAKIM • CULTS • KREAYSHAWN

BLACK THOUGHT & J. PERIOD MIXTAPE • TITUS ANDRONICUS DJ ?UESTLOVE • THE VACCINES • TENNIS • THE BUDOS BAND

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naked

the thebellcurve

city

CP’s Quality-o-Life-o-Meter

[ + 1] The National Transportation Safety Board recommends that Ride the Ducks review its safety program. “And now, some words of advice for the citizens of Pompeii.”

[0 ]

A cop arrests two friends paddling a raft down flooded Main Street, saying the charge is “a lack of common sense.” Forget it, Jake, it’s Manayunk.

[ -2 ]

Two men from the suburbs are robbed when they use Craigslist to arrange to meet somebody in SW Philly to buy iPads. On the upside, Lenny Dysktra finally came up with a successful business plan.

[ -4 ]

The number of towns that add fluoride to their water hasn’t increased in Pennsylvania the way it has for the country as a whole, according to the CDC. “Can’t frack with fluoride,” shrugs Gov. Corbett.

[ + 1 ] Birdwatchers gather to check out exotic

species blown into the area by hurricane Irene. As they wash up on the banks of the Schuylkill.

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[ -5 ]

[0 ] [0 ]

[0 ]

Two teens face aggravated-assault charges after exploding a homemade bomb in a postal worker’s mail cart. Too much flash, not enough mob. Cheri Honkala, Green Party candidate for sheriff, rides through Kensington on horseback. Horse now ahead of her in the polls. ESPN the Magazine runs a story titled “What if Michael Vick were white” with a computer-generated Caucasian Vick. Look out, CGI WhiteBot Vick’s gone haywire! He’s making the laughing dog from Duck Hunt fight Arcanine from Pokemon for sport! Oh no, what’s he doing to Crash Bandicoot? With their contract due to expire soon, Catholic school teachers rally for better pay and flexibility. Unfortunately, there’s only one way to earn the blind loyalty and unwavering support of the Archdiocese of Philadelphia.

[ + 2 ] The Rachael Ray Show visits Philadel-

phia and builds a community garden on Passyunk Avenue in South Philly. “Yummo is not a word,” says a disembodied voice. “This is America! Speak English!”

This week’s total: -7 | Last week’s total: 16

EVAN M. LOPEZ

[ propaganda ]

ACKERMAN’S MESSAGE MACHINE The superintendent’s School District communications staff acted as her personal PR image-boosting team. By Daniel Denvir

wo knowledgeable sources tell City Paper that former Superintendent Arlene Ackerman ran a School District communications team dedicated to promoting and defending her personally, and which coordinated and assisted public rallies in her favor, communicated with private supporters, and spent taxpayer time and money on various kinds of “propaganda,” including protest signs and a farewell tribute video. Since Ackerman’s departure after negotiating a nearly $1 million contract buyout, one source says the same team continues to manage Ackerman’s antagonistic public relations campaign against Mayor Michael Nutter and others. The three communications staffers who allegedly orchestrated a personal public relations campaign for Ackerman — former director Jamilah Fraser and staffers Shana Kemp and Elizabeth Childs — resigned last Monday, the same day that Ackerman’s buyout was announced. According to one source, the three were told they would be fired if they did not resign because they had gone rogue, spending the majority of their time working for the superintendent even as she was headed out the door. “The communications office was running a PR-support operation

for Ackerman,” says one source with detailed knowledge. “It seems like a real problem if, as a District employee, you are essentially inciting people to rally against the District that you work for,” says City Councilman Bill Green, a critic of the District’s large communications budget. “It’s clearly not appropriate to spend public dollars that way, and I certainly hope that the city controller and auditor general look into it.” State Auditor General Jack Wagner’s office declined to comment. City Controller Alan Butkovitz did not return calls by press time. “It was a communications office for the superintendent, not for the District,” says a second source. “It was like a personal PR team.” Ackerman paid top dollar to the three people directing her message machine: Fraser received $170,000, and Kemp and Childs made $135,000 each. Acting Communications Director Fernando Gallard would not respond to specific allegations laid out by these sources. “We are currently focusing on the work ahead, and we’re busy making sure that we have a successful school year starting this Sept. 6,” says Gallard. “That is going to be the only focus of my office here, and I’m not going to comment on any allegations regarding the past work done here.” Fraser and Kemp declined to comment for this story, and Childs did not respond to repeated interview requests.

A “clearly inappropriate” use of public dollars.

³ AS CRITICISM GREW louder, the superintendent echoed allega-

tions made by activists that she was unfairly targeted because of her >>> continued on page 9

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[ a million stories ]

✚ SAFE BETS

✚ STORM TROOPERS

Just hours after Mayor Michael Nutter declared a citywide emergency and urged Philadelphia residents to stay in their homes, SugarHouse Casino was alive and humming with gamblers, not a few of them — somewhat amazingly, given the weather — rather elderly. Concern for the hurricane’s impact had led New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie to order Atlantic City casinos shut down for only the third time in the 33 years of legalized gambling there. Not so in Southeastern Pennsylvania, where Harrah’s Chester, Parx Casino in Bensalem and SugarHouse here in Philly remained open — “unless the roof blows off,” in the case of Parx, as reported to the Montgomery County Times Herald. “We will stay open,” affirmed SugarHouse general manager Wendy Hamilton at about 9:30 p.m. Saturday, adding: “It’s actually harder to close a casino than just to remain open.” Asked about safety concerns for people (especially elderly people) leaving the casino in the middle of the storm, Hamilton suggested that “most of the people who are traveling left already,” and that people were welcome to stay the night. “We’re going to have power, a/c, food — it’s a very relaxed atmosphere.” Nearby on the slot machines, 62-year-old Dennis Brian affirmed that his plan was to spend the night at SugarHouse. “I’ll stay until 8:30 tomorrow,” he said, noting, “I’ve got my medicine in my car.” Another slots player said he was staying only until an upcoming prize drawing, adding: “If the city declared an emergency, well, they didn’t close this place. Is it the money?” Shortly after tweeting a few reports from the casino, this author received a reply, also via Twitter: If you see such-and-such per—Isaiah Thompson son, the tweet read, “tell him to go home.”

As the winds died down and the sun reappeared Sunday afternoon, two men emerged from a cardboard shanty beneath an overpass in the Callowhill district and began to carefully hang wet clothing on top of a chain-link fence across the street. That chore complete, the men agreed, they were in fine shape. Richard Green, 40, and Kevin Smith, 46, in fact stayed quite dry, thanks to a simple but remarkably effective rigging of plastic tarps over the little hut in which they’ve spent the last two years, homeless. The two men are among the many homeless who decline to enter the city’s shelter system — both the Ridge Avenue shelter and Our Brother’s Place shelter are only a few blocks away — for various reasons: The conditions are dangerous (“I’ve had more stolen in the shelters than out on the street,” said Smith); the rules are many and onerous; and they’re a particularly tough place for gay couples like them. The couple does use certain services offered by some — not, they emphasized, all — of the shelters and other organizations that serve the homeless. Often, they grab a shower and bite to eat at the Ridge shelter, which is scheduled to close this December. What with the hurricane, though, Sunday had been particularly bleak for them. “The shelters were so packed today they couldn’t feed no one,” commented Green, just as a small sparrow showed up to nibble at some crumbs outside his shanty. Across the street, a flock of pigeons was gathering. “Our little friends,” Green murmured at the bird. “I guess it’s time to feed them.” —Isaiah Thompson

5 10 15

… Stu Bykofsky’s latest target

20 35

MARIA QUIÑONES-SÁNCHEZ

City Paper: You’ve been vocal in opposing a program that gives Immigration and E VA N M . L O P E Z

Customs Enforcement (ICE) real-time access to a police arrest database. Why? Maria Quiñones-Sánchez: The data has proved our concern: Philadelphia is one

of the biggest deporters, and many of the people [in the database] are innocent victims and minor offenders. This is what we believe creates a public security risk, because you have people unwilling to call police because of the relationship to ICE. There’s a growing trend of women not reporting domestic violence. With the city’s “stop snitching” culture, the last thing we need is another blemish on the police force. I’ve proposed a medium point: Instead of giving ICE immediate access to the information, give them access once a preliminary hearing has been held. CP: Daily News columnist Stu Bykofsky on Monday called you “reliably ill-informed,”

and wrote that you put “those here illegally” above your “own constituents.” MQS: I represent the district with the largest group of new immigrants — Russianspeaking, Asian and obviously Latinos. I’m doing exactly what my constituents elected me to do. Philadelphia has been repopulated because of this new immigrant population. CP: Bykofsky wrote he has “no faith” that you read a recent report on deportations.

Seventh District representative; first Latina on City Council; former get-out-the-vote activist.

MQS: Council in June unanimously passed a resolution opposing the program, cosponsored by Jim Kenney. The fact that he would pick on me and say that I don’t read my own work is very offensive. I understand that there needs to be someone like him —Daniel Denvir at the Daily News, because there’s a market for that trash.

By Isaiah Thompson

POOR VISION ³ THIS WEEK, DAILY NEWS columnist Stu

Bykofsky once again cried foul from his perch above the Good Ship Philadelphia, this time because of a letter from Councilwoman Maria Quiñones-Sánchez to Mayor Michael Nutter regarding the city’s participation in a program that allows Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) officials access to the city’s police arrest database. The idea, as put forth by ICE, is to target illegal immigrants who pose a public-safety threat. One problem — as the mayor, District Attorney and Police Commissioner agree — is the protection of victims and witnesses of crime who now might be reluctant to call the cops. The present agreement, which excludes ICE from seeing victim and witness reports, officially expired on Wednesday, and city officials are set to decide on the terms of a new one. Bykofsky painted Quiñones-Sánchez as being a loner in opposing the program and said she had misread a recent report by the American Immigration Lawyers Association that found many cases where people were deported for minor infractions. Bykofsky’s bifocals are slipping.Quiñones-Sánchez, who enjoys the support of a unanimous vote by her colleagues in Council, in fact asked the mayor either to terminate the agreement or restructure it, a nicety Stu left out. Her alternative proposal would allow ICE to access information not from the police but from the courts. The proposal comes in response to the illogical proposition maintained by city officials that the current system does, in fact, protect all witnesses and victims. The problem is, that status — entered into the database by responding police officers — can change. Suspects turn out to be witnesses or victims.That’s why we have courts of law, representation, due process: little trivialities of the American Way that the current deal ignores. Had Stu time for closer reading himself, he might not have tooted his horn over his own botched reading of the AILA report: He confuses the 127 cases of questionable deportations studied out of the 400,000 total deportations last year to be a proportion, instead of what the report says those cases represent: a sample of anecdotal examples collected by survey. A different study showed that more than half the people turned over to ICE by Philadelphia Police were never convicted of a crime. But why quibble? Bykofsky’s main argument, “Illegal immigration is illegal,” as he writes, is simple — obtuse, bullying, and heartless — but very, very simple. ✚ Isaiah Thompson can be reached at isaiah.thompson@ citypaper.net.

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[ the rules are many and onerous ]

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<<< continued from page 6

³ ACCORDING TO CP sources, during Ackerman’s

chine is still at work, says the first source, coordinating an increasingly aggressive media strategy that has included sharp-tongued interviews with Education Week, Fox 29 and WURD 900 AM. During the WURD interview, Ackerman said the communications staffers “were ushered out like criminals.” Indeed, Ackerman seems to be turning up the heat: On WURD, she urged parents to “vote with

They organized rallies and made posters in her support. their feet” and take their kids out of the public schools. In a major surprise, she voiced support for school vouchers — a controversial pet project of state Sen. Anthony Williams, an ally. She now plans a series of workshops for parents to, she says, “help them navigate the system.” At last Wednesday’s tumultuous SRC meeting, the activists whom the communications team cultivated shouted in protest, and one person even accused black SRC members of “lynching” Ackerman. “I think that Dr. Ackerman may have played the inside politics not to her advantage,” observes City Councilwoman Jannie Blackwell, who says the former superintendent plans to stay in Philadelphia through December. “But apparently she’s played it well enough that she has her settlement, and she’s still here, and she has her community support.” (daniel.denvir@citypaper.net)

feedback From our readers

TRUTHERS AND CONSEQUENCES We received numerous comments at citypaper.net regarding our story about the fractured 9/11 Truth Movement [“The Truth About Truthers,” Patrick Rapa, Aug. 25].A main subject of the story, Jon Gold, wrote, “Thank you for covering this extremely important issue. This is a fair and balanced article — something you don’t ordinarily see on the subject.” But John Edmiston Milich called it “shallow ‘journalism,’” asserting that “Rapa carefully constructs his ‘9/11 truthers’ as straw men, then knocks them down with facile ignorance and guilt by association. Rapa seeks to marginalize and stereotype those who sincerely seek the facts about what really happened on Sept. 11, 2001.” Commenter Jayeats offered,“Some of the smarter groups of the 9/11 movement have been extremely focused on Building 7 and nothing else. This is a good path to follow — it was the plotters’ biggest failure.” FamilyMember took issue with the “fractured” description: “Where is the mention of all the family members who supported the ballot initiative in New York City a couple of years ago? What about the RememberBuilding7.org campaign that shows military, first responders and family members working together? What about Firefightersfor911Truth.org? And Military Officers for 9/11 Truth (mo911truth. org)? Even the last poll taken about Building 7 shows that half of New Yorkers want it investigated. I don’t know, but I think a lot of people who know the truth are a lot more unified than this article leads one to believe.” But Dave Rickerson counters, “The one point I take seriously that handicaps the truthers more than just about anything else is our inability to work together. Spread too thin, we are not effective.” GET REAL Our cover story about the network of pro-life centers funded by taxpayer dollars [“Cash and Carry,” Holly Otterbein,Aug. 18] caused dctophilly to write:“I am a ‘pro-lifer’ and I liked this story. … The fact that these women agree to speak with counselors from Real Alternatives shows a willingness to consider something other than abortion. I think Real Alternatives would be better served by treating these women as intelligent beings and providing options as well as things like PAP smears, STD tests, mamograms, etc. If you’re going to encourage women to keep their children or at least carry them to term, provide some real medical services to help them and their babies get there in the best physical shape possible.”

✚ We welcome and encourage your feedback. Mail letters to Feedback, City Paper, 123 Chestnut St., 3rd Floor, Phila., PA 19106. E-mail editorial@citypaper.net or comment online at citypaper.net. Submissions may be edited for clarity and space.

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last week in office, Fraser and her deputies fought a rear-guard guerilla PR war, beginning with a sensational Aug. 18 appearance at a principal’s meeting. Ackerman entered to Sade’s “Is It a Crime” and recited the Maya Angelou poem “Still I Rise.” She asked, “Is it a crime to stand up for children instead of stooping down into the political sandbox and selling our children for a politician’s victory?” And then, she dared the SRC to fire her — knowing full well that her departure was already being arranged. Indeed, she was negotiating it. The team’s final offensive was mounted last Monday, as word of Ackerman’s imminent departure spread: A video tribute to Ackerman was posted on the District website. About an hour later, the video was gone, removed by angry District officials. The video, now on Ackerman’s new personal YouTube channel, describes the sorry state of Philly public schools before Ackerman took the helm in 2008, and features teachers, principals, students and parents testifying to the success Ackerman oversaw. But the clips edited into the video were compiled from a variety of sources, and one featured principal was surprised to hear that her interview was used to promote the superintendent.

³ ACKERMAN’S MESSAGE ma-

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race and sex. According to CP’s sources, the communications office was in touch with the same small group of African-American activists, coordinating and making posters for a July 22 rally. “They made posters and then handed them out to 15 or so supporters,” says the second source. One sign asked, “What About Our Children?” Another defended Ackerman’s signature school initiative, reading “Keep Promise Academies.” Pamela Williams, a District security guard and Ackerman supporter, was in and out of the communications office before and after the July 22 protest. (The District later opened an investigation because Williams was out of work on disability at the time.) Emmanuel Bussie, an outspoken pro-Ackerman activist and regular sight at School Reform Commission (SRC) meetings, allegedly coordinated his activism with the District communications team. “They organized rallies,” says the second source. “They had been working with Emmanuel Bussie, and he was, I guess, their contact person to get people to come to rallies.” At an Aug. 3 SRC meeting, Bussie compared Ackerman to Rosa Parks and called for her to stay. Bussie told CP, “I’m in communication with everybody, and it was never about coordinating our actions.” He added, “We just absolutely adore this woman for what she stands for,” saying that Promise Academies delivered resources to students most in need. “Even if I was a regular visitor to the communications office, and I wasn’t a regular visitor to the communications office, it was to ask for data.” He sees no problem with the District spending money to support Ackerman. “As a matter of fact, I think they should have spent more money and more resources to retain Dr. Ackerman.”

“That was, to my knowledge, something in-house, maybe to be shown on the School District channel in the future,” says Christine Connor, principal of John Webster School, noting that her interview was filmed in May to mark Webster’s graduation from Empowerment School status. Both sources consulted for this story confirm that the video was produced by communications staffers Fraser and Kemp, working on the taxpayer dollar.

the naked city

✚ Ackerman’s Message Machine

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Drinking to Cope? The Treatment Research Center is currently conducting a clinical research study in which participants will receive naltrexone (an FDAapproved medication) or placebo (inactive medication). For further information, or an eligibility screening, call 215-222-3200, ext. 170.

[ the naked city ]

the naked city feature

➡ FC ROIVNEGREA G E

The Outer Limits BY SHAUN BRADY sail and a table. The idea, Phillips says, is “to create an epic spectacle in an intimate setting. We set up two elements that, with the audience’s imagination, will complete the picture. It’s very open to the imagination.” Bare bones though it may be, the show is bound to be filled with the flights of whimsy that always mark Phillips’ pieces. “The idea is to trip the audience out and create an experience,” he says. “If you’re going to the theater, let’s create an experience, not just a thing you sit back and watch.” Headlong Dance Theater and Brian Sanders’ JUNK control the vertical, climbing up toward the surface of Mars, or down into a zombie-infested subbasement of an apartment building. Headlong audiences rarely get a chance to “sit back and watch,” and Red Rovers starts by reassigning each attendee a new identity, complete with name tag, for a Jet Propulsion Laboratories conference of Mars rover drivers. They’ll be expected to participate in a yoga session, get involved in a David Bowie dance number, or cobble together a landing appa-

inspired by the deaths of a 19-year-old JUNK dancer and Sanders’ own father, both of whom took their own lives. “I hate it when I as an audience member am used as someone’s therapy couch,” Sanders insists. “So I try to abstract what I’m working on … so that it’s just the essence of my personal experience that other people can identify with.” As with 2009’s swimming-pool-set Urban Scuba, JUNK’s acrobatic grace is contrasted with a decaying space, in this case the cavernous “industrial church” underneath the 444 Lofts. “Part of the idea behind JUNK,” Sanders says, “is turning junk into an art form. It’s making discarded and unwanted and abandoned ideas into something beautiful.” New Paradise Laboratories can change the focus to a soft blur or sharpen it to crystal clarity, shifting perspective via the strange new world of the social network. The Internet may be replete with the human element, posting and tweeting and liking at the speed of data, but it all still feels extremely dehumanizing. NPL has been exploring that paradox: “We’re interested in this intersection of the virtual and the real,” explains Whit MacLaughlin, director of Extremely Public Displays of Privacy, a new show that unfolds in three acts: the first online, the second via a downloadable walking tour, and the third live on an unconventional (and secret) stage. “Your head is basically a virtual realm,” MacLaughlin continues, “so we’re thinking of theater as not just happening in the darkened box. Web expression gives you the chance to invade the whole world with your thinking and think of the whole world as your stage.” The show follows the slightly less sprawling experimentation of 2009’s Fatebook, which gave each of its characters virtual lives in addition to the show itself. “Extremely Public Displays is Fatebook 2.0,” MacLaughlin says, “and it’s all beta.” MacLaughlin promises “three unprecedented theatrical experiences,” striving to preserve some corner of the net to house art for art’s sake. “If we don’t want it to be just a shopping mall, we have to work hard to keep importing soul into the Internet.” You are about to participate in a great adventure. (s_brady@citypaper.net)

“INVADE THE WORLD WITH YOUR THINKING.” The impossibility of our amazing ability to communicate with and get information back from the rovers over millions of miles mirrors how challenging it can be for us as humans to communicate with each other.” The relationships between the gravity-defying corpses in Brian Sanders’ Dancing Dead may have been cut short by some long-forgotten 1970s apocalypse, but that won’t stop them from partying together to a Captain & Tennille hit. Alternately beautiful, tragic and playful, Dancing Dead was

✚ For tickets and information, call 215-413-1318 or visit livearts-fringe.org.

RED ROVERS | PHOTO BY ANDREW SIMONET

DANCING DEAD | PHOTO BY BILL HEBERT

➡ THERE IS NOTHING wrong with your theatrical experience. Do not attempt to adjust the scenery. Four veteran Live Arts and Fringe companies are taking control of your live entertainment. Lucidity Suitcase Intercontinental controls the horizontal, roaming the world as far as Antarctica and as near as Red Lobster. As is typical with Thaddeus Phillips’ inventive productions, he reaches those locales — and others, including a fiber-optic station in New Jersey and the set of Carl Sagan’s Cosmos — with a bare minimum of resources. WHaLE OPTICS, his world première conceived with a quintet of local performers, is especially resourceful, allowing the cast to record whale songs or dine on chain seafood with little more than a rolling scaffold, a ship’s

➡ live arts/fringe (2011)

ratus for a model rover. “I love the unpredictability of it,” says co-director Amy Smith. “You can try to choreograph the audience but you can’t entirely succeed, and that’s exciting.” The show was inspired by an episode of NPR’s Science Friday featuring the head of the Mars exploration mission. “I loved the anthropomorphization of the rovers when he told their crazy stories,” Smith recalls. “He talked about them having bouts of amnesia and degrading and falling apart in an almost human way. The humanizing of these robots really intrigued me.

THIS YEAR, PERFORMERS ARE REALLY PUSHING IT.

EXTREMELY PUBLIC DISPLAYS | PHOTO BY FESS ELLIOT

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S TA R T S HERE

PHOTO BY NEAL SANTOS

Plays & Players, 1714 Delancey St., 215-413-1318, livearts-fringe.org.

➡ CREATING A PIECE of theater that takes on both method acting and A Streetcar Named Desire — that’s so meta it’s got to be satire, right? Nope. But the Austin-based 28-members-and-counting ensemble Rude Mechanicals know they’re walking a tightrope. “It may smell like satire, but it isn’t,” says director Shawn Sides. “Satire implies that you somehow know better than whatever you are presenting. We are presenting things that we’ve done, learned, practiced, and people we are and continue to be. It just so happens that we are ridiculous.” For The Method Gun, the Rude Mechs came up with a maniacally obsessive boss, Stella Burden — a character who melds iconic stage deities Lee Strasberg and Stella Adler and performance artist Chris Burden — and a theater group suffering under her rule. The faux company must endure Stella Burden’s violently degrading and dangerous theatrical training while creating a modern, high-concept version of Streetcar. It’s no coincidence that several core members of the Mechs spent time in the company of the legendarily manipulative wild man of theater teaching, James Ayres, founder of the esteemed Shakespeare at Winedale in Texas and a harshly demanding gurulike cuss of a teacher. “Doc,” as he is lovingly referred to by several of the Mechs, was a fine entry point for The Method Gun. “Having that guru, who I reckon would be livid to be referred to as a guru, by the way, is part of what drew us to Stella’s company,” says Sides. “Many nights at Winedale, after we did a performance of what we had worked on that day, when we finished there would be a long silence. Doc would spit, tell us we were glib, and then disappear into the night. We were left on the barn stage with nothing but our feelings of failure, inadequacy, foreboding and the gnawing sense that we didn’t quite understand what the word ‘glib’ meant.” Early advocates of the method style of acting like Strasberg and Adler “fancied themselves gurus and so their students understood that as the way these lessons must be taught,” says actor Thomas Graves. To that end, playwright Kirk Lynn says there was a sense of wonderment at work along with a hard-core level of gambling. “The Stella Burden Company was obsessed with discovering something about what it means to risk a part of themselves on stage, of finding a place where truth and beauty meet.” “We did not set out to satirize Streetcar or actor training,” says Graves. “We were trying to understand what it is that we do and why we do it. It’s true that sometimes this whole endeavor seems a bit ridiculous to us. But we keep doing it, so hopefully it’s more than just ridiculous.” (a_amorosi@citypaper.net)

“IT JUST SO HAPPENS THAT WE ARE RIDICULOUS.”

✚ Sept. 2, 10 p.m.; Sept. 3, 3 and 8 p.m.; Sept. 4, 3 p.m.; $25-$30, Wilma

Theater, 265 S. Broad St.; 215-413-1318, livearts-fringe.org.

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✚ Sept. 2-17, various times, $25-$30,

TEXAS REARRANGERS RUDE MECHANICALS GET META WITH THE METHOD GUN. BY A.D. AMOROSI

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➡ TWO MINUTES INTO a phone call with the cast of Elephant Room and something is already on fire. “I don’t want you to worry,” says Dennis Diamond. “But there is a very small fire in the theater. Daryl is rehearsing a bit for the show.” Diamond, with a dark mustache and yellow-tinted glasses, resembles a used-car salesman from the ’80s. Daryl Hannah, with a black mustache and a head of frizzy Weird Al curls, looks like something awful from the ’90s. And their comrade Louie Magic, sporting long blond hair and, yep, a mustache, is the spitting image of Joe Dirt. For weeks now, Diamond, Hannah and Magic — whose real names are Steve Cuiffo, Geoff Sobelle and Trey Lyford, respectively — have been in character, prepping for their magic show at the Live Arts Festival. The performance, Diamond promises, will usher viewers into a “secret society” where “you will be rocked and

amazed by the beauty of magic.” For his part, Diamond is a mentalist, which means he claims to perform hypnosis, mind control and telepathy on viewers. “It’s the art of controlling somebody’s attention,” he explains. When asked if his friends are annoyed with him being in character 24/7, he claims, “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Suddenly, an alarm goes off on the other line. It’s the fire again. “Oh, Daryl!” screeches Diamond. “He has a massive wound … I’m literally holding his face on with one hand.” Despite this, Diamond passes the phone to Hannah, who explains that he was trying to do pyrotechnics, but something went awry. Then he gets into his back story. He explains that he learned “therapy magic” and shamanism in an Arizona jail, where he was locked up for “nothing serious, just some DUIs.” Next time he attempts to do pyrotechnics, “I won’t mix liquid nitrogen with the gunpowder,” he says. “That was a mistake.” This blend of The Three Stooges, absurdism and funstache humor — as well as a few legitimate sleights of hand — is exactly what to expect from Elephant Room, a 75-minute performance that has somehow been deemed appropriate for children ages 10 and up. Sobelle is a member of the demented, fantastic troupe Pig

Streetcar Crash

feature

RUN-INS WITH THE DIME-STORE TRICKSTERS OF ELEPHANT ROOM. BY HOLLY OTTERBEIN

➡ live arts/fringe (2011)

the naked city

Magic Shtick

Iron Theater, and with Lyford he heads up the performance art collaboration “rainpan 43.” The two are also Live Arts veterans. The Washington Post described the Philly-based actors as “oddball” performers who make the audience “happy to be served banana slices on toothpicks while making believe they’re tasting brains.” The New York Times called them “crackpot inventors” who give “intricately nuanced comic performances.” They’re surprisingly decent magicians, too. Indeed, weeks before our phone conversation, the three tricksters magically find me at a bar, though at that point I hadn’t reached out to them at all. Somehow, they knew that I would be writing an article about them, despite the fact that I had learned as much myself only hours earlier. They were all in character — even before they found me — and suavely made a few items disappear before a crowd. When asked how they knew who or where I was, Diamond said, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Then he started explaining his theories about the Bermuda Triangle — there is more than just one swirling in the world’s waterways, apparently — and how performers are lost in it every year. Here’s to hoping there isn’t one in the Delaware, and that these three stick around for a long, strange time. (editorial@citypaper.net)

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Body Language DANCE LECTURER SUSAN FOSTER THROWS HERSELF INTO HER WORK. BY DENI KASREL conference rooms and lecture halls where the last thing you would ever expect is to see someone dancing. But since the subject of my presentation is dance, I feel it’s important to actually show dance while I lecture about it.

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➡ SUSAN FOSTER WANTS to make you think about how you feel while you’re watching dance. Deep thoughts, too — not just about what you’re feeling, but why you’re feeling that way. The reasons may surprise you, as may Foster’s fullbody presentation, “Kinesthetic Empathies & The Politics of Compassion,” which upends the usual format for academic lectures. City Paper: So you’re coming here with a dance lecture, or a lecture dance — can it go either way? Susan Foster: No, actually it’s a dance lecture. I also do what I call talking dances, and that’s where I’m making a dance that happens to have talking involved. These are dance lectures. They’re specifically written for scholarly occasions and for generally stuffy, uptight university

CP: What originally inspired you to do this kind of presentation? SF: One of the things about writing about dance is, it’s very hard to do. And it foregrounds a lot of theoretical issues that other disciples face, but really brings it right up in front of you. It’s terribly difficult to describe human movement. So I wanted people to think about that while I was lecturing. So here I am, presenting information about dance, or about the moving body, and I wanted them to think about the difficulty of writing about what they were looking at, at the same time. CP: And it’s also kind of satire. SF: Absolutely. CP: Is the lecture meant to come off as funny where people are laughing, or is it more an intellectual joke? SF: I think when it succeeds

it’s funny and kind of deep and kind of ironic at the same time, and earnest. All of those. DK: I don’t know if you’re making fun of it, but it is the world you work in. You are a professor, an academic. SF: It is the world I work in. And I’m trying to change that world by humorously commenting on it. CP: As if you’re popping your own balloon? It’s the world you operate in — which, as you say, is stuffy.

“I’M PLANNING TO PUT MYSELF IN SOME PHYSICAL JEOPARDY.” SF: What I’m more trying to do is call people’s attention to what their expectations are for what a lecture is. I start out at a podium and I start moving around. And people start to think, whoa, she’s supposed to stay at the podium. It’s just trying to get people aware of what an occasion usually calls for, what people’s expectations are about things and then trying to unsettle those a bit … and I’m hoping there’s going to be dancing a fair amount of the time I’m lecturing. CP: Because people might feel inspired to get off their feet? SF: I’m going to ask for volunteers.

➡ live arts/fringe (2011)

CP: And the point of that is … SF: One of the things that I’m talking about in this lecture is what happens when you participate in a dance class. What happens when you are actually learning movement from another person? So I’m asking people to observe how people are learning movement from another person. CP: Is that the “Kinesthetic Empathies” part? SF: The question I am asking in this lecture is, how is it that we feel that we know what another body is feeling? And specifically, how is it that we feel that we know what a dancing body is feeling that we’re watching on stage? Usually when people are watching dance, they’re thinking that whatever they’re feeling is the product of having felt along with the person who is dancing. Part of a way of thinking about an answer to that question is, well, what happens to people when they actually try to learn to dance? CP: This kind of reminds me of how it’s often said that dance is the universal language. SF: Dance is the mother of the arts. I’ve heard that, too. I’m not really down with either of those statements. CP: It’s like, it’s universal if there’s some familiarity to begin with. SF: Well, a lot of people are going to say, we can understand, even if we’re from really different situations. And I’m saying that what we have to do is examine the claim to feel that universality, and what is the politics behind it. … It’s very interesting, and it usually rationalizes some form of power organization. CP: Do you need to be a dance head to get what you’re going for? SF: It’s dance-focused, but I think the question I’m asking is a really general question that’s terrifically important for everybody in the world right now. … How do we identify with other human beings? CP: You also hurl yourself into the audience. Is it physically taxing for you to do this? SF: I don’t know. I’m planning to put myself in some physical jeopardy. Whether I survive that or not is another question. (d_kasrel@citypaper.net) ✚ Sun., Sept. 11, 4 p.m., free, Live Arts Studio, 919 N. Fifth St., 215-413-1318, livearts-fringe.org.

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Ready for His Sponge Bath, which deals with his late father’s lung cancer with humor and heart; and NYU professor Jeffrey Stanley’s comedy about family secrets, dream interpretation, Nietzsche and acute alcoholism, Beautiful Zion: A Book of the Dead, featuring live Ouija board spirit world communication with audience volunteers. Cymande Lewis’ My Name is Sam Johnson recalls her formative Vermont years as the only black student in a one-room schoolhouse, and her return to Philadelphia in search of her birth mother. “I began writing this show,” Lewis explains, “to find my voice and make peace with some of the more difficult parts of my life.” Monica Day uses movement, music and ritual to explore the lifelong stigma of her conservative Catholic father’s belief that she was a “whore risk” in Song of the Sacred Whore.Amber Womack’s Should I Be Sweet? is listed under Music in the festival guide, but Womack shares her journey from small-town Texas country singer to NYC opera and cabaret star in story as well as song. Original fictional works include Israeli artist Yael Rasooly’s Paper Cut, in which a lonely secretary acts out her daydreams with cut-out pictures and random objects in an adventure that’s both hilarious and harrowing. Siblings M. Craig

returns in Jose Aviles’ fine-tuned production, featuring Singel as a host of characters involved in a gay wedding, including his locally famous alter ego, Iris Holcombe, as the title character. Solo works exist as plays, but can also be adapted from literature. Nevermore features three Edgar Allen Poe classics: John Devennie performs the little-

Veggie Tales BY CAROLYN HUCKABAY

➡ MEAT MAN

When hardcore vegan activist Violent Violet threatens to put door-todoor meat salesman Meat Man out of business in the town of Unwillington, all hell breaks loose. The carnivorous neighborhood spirals into an anemic freak-out, and, of course, they do it in song. Can’t get those fleshy musical numbers out of your head? Reel 9 Productions reports that they’ve been filming the whole savory she-

known story “Hop-Frog,” while Christopher Reinig shares “The TellTale Heart” and Matthew Celly performs “The Raven,” all infused with music befitting the venue: The Hard Rock Café. Magic Circle Theater Co. provides more spookiness with Solo Tales of Terror: Lovecraft & Stoker. Chris Morse performs the former’s “The Statement of Randolph Carter,” and Josh Hitchens embodies the latter’s “Dracula.” Mark Kennedy’s Checkers imagines a character in Witold Gombrowicz’ 1938 absurdist classic Ivona, Princess of Burgundia. Checkers is a hapless servant who, Kennedy explains, “never quite fully enters a room before being ordered out of it.” His play asks, “How do you speak to your true love when you’ve never even spoken?” 1828.1 Production Co.’s Hello America … My Name Is Jimmy Baldwin brings the famous author of Another Country and Go Tell It on the Mountain back to life in Robert H. Miller’s script. The most recognizable playwrights with solo shows are Neil LaBute (also represented by Room6 Theatre’s This Is How It Goes) and Sam Shepard, author of Buried Child. LaBute’s Bash: Latter Day Plays, presented by RileSmith Arts, contains the confessions of three essentially good Mormons — played by Joe Matyas, Pascale Smith and Josh Totora — who commit bizarrely violent crimes. New City Stage Co. presents Shepard’s solo pieces Savage/Love and Tongues, both written with the late Joseph Chaikin and performed by Russ Widdall. The Fringe may provide adventures, scandals, laughs and plenty of tearful performances. But true success comes in knowing you alone can keep your audience rapt for an hour in those damn chairs. (m_cofta@citypaper.net)

SINGLE ARTISTS GET INTIMATE AND PORTABLE.

PAPER CUT | PHOTO BY BOAZ ZIPPOR

➡ QUICK QUIZ: What best defines the Philly Fringe? Is it (A) mind-twisting experiences, (B) risqué comedy, (C) emotional explorations, (D) rickety folding chairs, or (E) solo performances? The answer: E. One-man (or -woman) plays are a Fringe staple. Intimate and portable, they allow a single artist — typically both writer and performer — to reach an audience without sponsorship by an established organization. One-person shows are in-your-face experiences, perfect for nontraditional spaces like bars and art galleries, and often secret-revealing confessionals. They can be fiction or non, funny, intense or both. This year’s Fringe features about 20. Autobiographical solo shows include Melissa McBain’s Going Back Naked, which shares the story of her mother, a Depression-era child star who had a risky affair with a young seminarian, became a concert pianist and sold Bibles doorto-door; Philadelphia resident Jay Nachman’s My Dad Is Now

A VEGAN KIDS DANCE … | PHOTO BY J. MAKARY

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OUR CRITIC CANNONBALLS INTO A SEA OF SOLO SHOWS. BY MARK COFTA

✚ For tickets and information, call 215-413-1318 or visit livearts-fringe.org.

SOLO TALES OF TERROR: LOVECRAFT & STOKER

the naked city feature

Party of One

➡ live arts/fringe (2011)

Getting and Jillian Taylor wrote Straw, Stick, Brick, in which Eric Scotolati plays a man building a monument to himself. “It’s about what we leave behind,” Getting explains, “how we leave our mark.” Big Star California, by NYC’s Missing Bolts Productions, backs a young woman’s life-changing road-trip story with live rock music. Eric Singel’s hilarious The Wedding Consultant, which played the Fringe in 2006,

bang, and a DVD and soundtrack will be available for purchase at every show. Sept. 6, 10-11 and 13, various times, $12, Mainstage at the Adrienne, 2030 Sansom St. ➡ A VEGAN KIDS

DANCE FOR ADULTS WITH NUDITY OK, so it’s a bit of a cheat to say Green Chair Dance Group’s eclectic evening of dance-theater has anything

to do with veganism — or nudity, for that matter — except that one of its directors is a total herbivore. But with a lineup that includes Gabrielle Revlock’s bird-inspired movement piece and trans artist Devynn Emory’s take on “gender-variant bodies on stage,” we’ll let it slide. Sept. 9-11, various times, $18, Mascher Space Co-op, 155 Cecil B. Moore Ave., greenchairdancegroup.com. ➡ CARNIVORES ANONYMOUS

It may be listed under comedy, but Carnivores Anonymous is all about vegucation. The performance centers around a talk-show-style slate of celebrity guests who’ve come to spread the good word, from a chef to the stars presenting a vegan cooking demo to anti-war activist Cindy Sheehan speaking out about the power of meatlessness. But don’t worry about antipork proselytizing. Public Eye: Artists for Animals’ Lisa Levinson promises it’s all about good music, comedy, activism and, best of all, delicious snacks. Where do we sign up? Sept. 16, 8 p.m., $15, Rotunda, 4014 Walnut St.

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Thursday & Friday 8PM Saturday 2PM & 8PM Sunday 2PM & 7PM

Caplan Studio Theater

211 S. Broad St., 16th ďŹ&#x201A;oor Tickets $15 215 - 413 -1318 www.livearts-fringe.org

THIS FILM IS RATED R. No one under 17 admitted without parent or able to enter contest. Winners will be awarded one (1) admit two pass and will be chosen at random. Employees of all promo partners are ineligible.

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TWELFTH NIGHT, OR WHAT YOU WILL

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How to Disappear Completely And Never Be Found 9/1-9/18 @ 2030 Sansom St. www.LunaTheater.org

The 2011 Rockys

A two-part collaboration of POETRY, MOVEMENT & SOUND

SEPTEMBER 2-17

Philadelphia Dance Awards + Cabaret 9/5 @ 8pm, 70 min/FREE, Cash bar The Ruba Club, 414 Green St.

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New City Stage Company presents Summer Angel Productionâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s new version of

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6DW 6HSW UG SP 7+( 52781'$ :DOQXW 6W Tickets $10 from the Festival Box Office (215) 413-1318 www.livearts-fringe.org

FOR TICKETS/INFO: 215-563-7500 WWW.NEWCITYSTAGE.ORG

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TEACH YOUR CHILDREN

A play by Tom Tirney Directed by Kaci Fannin

Preview: 9/1 @ 8pm Shows: 9/2-9/17 @ 8pm Matinee: 9/11 @ 2pm

www.teachyourchildren-theplay.com

The Wedding Consultant

Written & Performed by Eric Singel 9/2-9/18 @ Walnut St. Theatre Studio 3 LiveArts-Fringe.org (215) 413-1318

PLENTIFUL is Family Fun

Dance, Music, Treats and Revelry InMovement Studio, 500 Kenilworth St 9/7: 7pm 9/10: 2pm and 7pm. $12 Infatuation Dance Company ^`SaS\ba

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Philly Shakespeare Theatre 21st & Sansom Street

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9 Shows 9/2 â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 9/18

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APOLLO 18 A haiku: “There’s a reason we’ve never gone back to the moon.” Too expensive, right? (Not reviewed) (UA Riverview)

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“Nothing about this case was ever believable. It was always the twilight zone in the Madoff case, because every time you saw something, it never made sense.” Set against an abstracting black background and addressing the camera, fraud investigator Harry Markopolos looks like he’s had an experience in that zone. Even as Markopolos repeatedly went to the SEC, over the course of 10 years, with evidence that Bernie Madoff was stealing from people, no one took notice: Papers were filed and ignored. Based on Markopolos’ book, No One Would Listen, Jeff Prosserman’s film makes its subjectivity a virtue. It shows Markopolos’ self-certainty (bolstered by his colleagues at Rampart Investment Management, who did believe him) and also his growing paranoia: When he re-enacts his concerns in deep shadows cocking a gun and glowering, the scenes are at once sensational, nutty and strangely affecting. Markopolos’ outrage is also supported by interviews with Madoff’s victims, identified here by their Madoff-numbered accounts. Along with Markopolos, they voice the film’s underlying argument: Madoff was not deviant, he was exemplary. His system depends on silence, on insularity, and on repeated looks the other way. The film insists that you look, that you feel uncomfortable, that you worry. —Cindy Fuchs (Ritz at the Bourse)

THE DEBT|BIs it moral to lie in the name of national catharsis, or should

citizens be allowed to confront difficult truths at the risk of widespread dissension? The Debt, a remake of a 2007 Israeli film, poses this question but muddles its answers, losing the weightier themes in a crowd-pleasing rush to push action and romance — an ironic failure given a story that argues against letting the public off the hook with easy fabrications. In the modern day, Helen Mirren plays Rachel Singer, a former Mossad agent whose daughter is publishing a book detailing her heroics as a Nazi hunter. The occasion brings a reunion with her two partners (Tom Wilkinson and Ciarán Hinds) and awakens memories that conflict with the story that’s been told for decades. In the flashback that comprises the bulk of the film, Jessica Chastain, Martion Csokas and Sam Worthington play the younger trio, tasked with bringing to justice the Mengele-styled “Surgeon of Birkenau” (Jesper Christensen). The mission does not go as planned, though Israel goes on believing that justice has been served. The only politics that Shakespeare in Love director John Madden seems interested in is sexual, leading to a trite love triangle featuring Worthington as the mopiest agent in the Mossad (showcasing once again how an actor who played the lead in virtually every blockbuster of the last couple of years can still seem so ignorable). The thriller mechanics remain taut but miss an opportunity to create more than tension. —Shaun Brady (UA Riverview)

A GOOD OLD FASHIONED ORGY|BIn theory, a movie about a bunch of very funny friends throwing a big, crazy sex party should be a kick in the nuts to all the moralistic casual-sex comedies that dropped this year (No Strings Attached, Hall Pass, Friends With Benefits). In practice, A Good Old Fashioned Orgy is as ridiculous as the rest of them, just a bit more self-aware. Hall Pass/SNL alum Jason Sudeikis is charming, if not quite empathetic,

proselytizer it wraps up by enticing you to hear more, reserving its climax to push a website to the (unlikely) curious. —S.B.

ABSURDLY

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A haiku: This one goes out to everybody who thinks Shark Week takes too long. (Not reviewed) (UA Riverview)

✚ CONTINUING BRIGHTON ROCK|C In his directorial debut, Rowan Joffe never attempts to explain why sociopathic anti-hero Pinkie Brown (Sam Riley) falls in with old-school mobsters instead of his scooter-riding contemporaries. It too often feels like a ’40s noir unfolding while Quadrophenia erupts in the background. The parallels hint at a theme of the basic amorality of youth and the struggle to reconcile violent impulses with Catholic guilt and the aimless energy of adolescence; worst of all, Joffe’s recasting of the Ida Arnold character as a matronly café manager not only squanders Helen Mirren but discards Greene’s most colorful asset, the brassy barfly-turnedamateur detective. —S.B. (Ritz Five)

COLOMBIANA In Bogotá, a fantasy space full of yellow light and crooked hillside rooftops, a little girl’s dad is murdered by evil drug runners, inspiring in her a lifelong vengeance plot. When she grows up, Cataleya (Zoe Saldana) becomes a contract killer for her uncle and — oh yes — a pathological serial assassin of those she considers responsible for her father’s death. She’s slinky and well-armed and high-tech, eluding the FBI, the CIA and the drug kingpins who want her dead. She’s also elusive romantically, as such damaged girls tend to be. While it’s sometimes clever and sometimes just stupid, Colombiana consistently fails to surprise. —C.F. (UA Riverview)

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CONAN THE BARBARIAN|CSay what you will about Arnold Schwarzenegger’s Conan the Barbarian, but the Governator undoubtedly brought his absurd charisma to the role. The same cannot be said for Jason Momoa’s Conan, a vengeful meathead who decapitates first and asks questions later. Without the camp humor there’s very little to like about this onetrick Barbarian, whose only solution to a problem is to grunt and run at it with his sword. —S.B. (UA Riverview)

A GOOD OLD FASHIONED

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SEVEN DAYS IN UTOPIA|D Perhaps the one thing duller than watching people play golf is watching people wax rhapsodic about playing golf. Seven Days in Utopia is a golf equipment ad disguised as a religious tract disguised as a film, based on David Cook’s inspirational novel. If you shut your eyes and simply listen to Robert Duvall’s homespun wisdom, the message seems to be something about faith improving both your life and your swing; but given the prominence of the company’s logo in virtually every frame, from close-ups of golf balls to the caps worn by one of the two leads at all times, what’s being hawked here is less Christ than Callaway clubs. Lucas Black plays Luke Chisolm, a prodigy who suffers a meltdown during a tournament game thanks to his overbearing father’s aggressive tutoring. Fleeing his life, he chances upon the titular town and Duvall’s ex-PGA pro-turned-guru, who restores the youngster’s love of the game through a Miyagi-style training regimen involving fly fishing, painting and pitching washers. Of course, what he really needs to learn involves saying grace and carrying a Bible, not to mention the simple pleasures of catching allegorical fireflies and holding off on a first kiss that he discovers through a not-quite-romance with a local girl. The film never suggests enough of Luke’s former life to reveal how any of this was missing beyond the implied fact that a lack of prominent faith is an obvious hole in anyone’s life, and like any good

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A haiku: Life is tough for an Australian superhero. Koalas are cute. (Not reviewed) (Ritz at the Bourse)

A COMEDY ABOUT

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[ movie shorts ]

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as a semi-spoiled man-child whose dad (leathery apparition Don Johnson) decides to sell the house in the Hamptons, thus putting an end to all those improbably elaborate theme parties his son and pals like to throw all summer long. (You know, the kind of expensive, lavishly decorated, aroundthe-pool, costumed super-keggers we normal people go to all the time.) No, this isn’t a good old-fashioned save-theclubhouse flick — it’s a semi-refreshing let’s-go-out-with-multiple-bangs kinda thing — but other familiar tropes are trotted out: the workout montage, the next-morning livestock shot, that thing where all the chicks are hot (Lake Bell, Angela Sarafyan) and the dudes are meh (Nick Kroll, Tyler Labine). It’s about a quarter sexy, half funny and, like any decent non-rom-com, entirely inconsequential, a fleeting indulgence you’ll forget the next morning. —Patrick Rapa (UA Riverview)

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CRAZY, STUPID, LOVE.|BAs mom and dad Steve Carell and Julianne Moore head toward divorce, their son (Jonah Bobo) nurses a fierce crush on his baby sitter (Analeigh Tipton), who is herself hot for Carell. Newly single Carell takes tips from seasoned pickup artist Ryan Gosling, who takes pity on the hapless older man but falls prey to Cupid’s wiles once the uncommonly resistant Emma Stone comes into the picture. Intertwining love plots go back at least as far as Restoration comedy, but the script peddles shopworn adages instead of hardearned truths. Each story feels like something that happened to a friend

of a friend, just far enough removed to feel naggingly out of whack. —Sam Adams (Roxy, UA Riverview)

DON’T BE AFRAID OF THE DARK|C Sally, relocated by her flake of a mother to live with her architect dad (Guy Pearce) and his interior designer lover (Katie Holmes), is a troubled kid wrestling with abandonment issues — so (naturally!) she clings to the teasing voices pleading for her friendship from a deep, dark hole in the basement. Though the grown-ups don’t believe her, Sally soon starts being terrorized by these otherworldy monsters that operate solely in the shadows. You

couldn’t pay for a better device with which to cultivate big scares, but the herky-jerky organization (screams one sec, snores the next) does no favors for Guillermo del Toro’s film, which takes little advantage of the latitude that comes with an R rating. —Drew Lazor (UA Riverview)

FINAL DESTINATION 5|B Yep, FD5 follows the absolutely exact same formula as its predecessors: Too-pretty-to-live yuppies escape a blood-gurgling catastrophe (thanks to a good ol’ Unexplained Premonition) only to find themselves hunted one by one by the unseen Rube Golbergian Death. Lots of dripping pipes, self-loosening bolts, fraying wires, that sorta thing. This time the disaster’s a bridge collapse, and there’s some weird, unconfirmed and ultimately pointless loophole it’s not worth going into here. This franchise has few surprises to offer, so don’t let anybody ruin FD5’s ridiculous and self-congratulatory ending for you. —P.R. (UA Riverview)

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FRIGHT NIGHT|BUnlike many a remake, this revamp of Tom Holland’s 1985 horror-comedy learned most of the right lessons from its predecessor. Anton Yelchin is Charley Brewster, a high-schooler whose best friend is convinced Charley’s new neighbor is a vampire. It just so happens that he’s right; enter an endearingly hammy Colin Farrell, making speeches about the “scent of fear” while suggesting that one way to survive the tedium of immortality is to simply not be very bright. The horror is tame, the comedy mild — both of which match the limited charms of Fright Night’s model. —S.B. (UA Riverview)

THE GUARD|AJohn Michael McDonagh, brother of lauded playwright and In Bruges director Martin McDonagh, takes a

whole-hog approach to exploiting the provincial reputation of the Irish in his directorial debut, following the amoral exploits of Gerry Boyle (Brendan Gleeson), an acid-dropping, hookerhiring, socially stunted police officer who could very well be the last clean cop on the Emerald Isle. What makes The Guard such a watchable black comedy, aside from its grinningly McQueen-like pace, is Gleeson’s serrated performance, at once childlike, cold and chummy. —D.L. (Ritz Five)

HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS: PART 2|B+ With our hero (Daniel Radcliffe) on a frantic search for the last of Lord Voldemort’s (Ralph Fiennes) Horcruxes, most Part 2 scenes are building blocks for the climactic Battle of Hogwarts, where the two factions finally dance. Though there are snacksize portions of the youthful, magiccharged mischief that four-time Potter director David Yates is so good at staging, there’s simply no time for Harry to sulk — Yates is too busy marching the kids through the thickets of death, remorse and salvation. —D.L. (Roxy)

THE HEDGEHOG|C Paloma (Garance Le Guillermic) is a wealthy, precocious 11-year-old who hides from her family via a camcorder she uses to chronicle “why life is absurd.” Her story is paralleled with that of her apartment building’s janitor, Mrs. Michel (Josiane Balasko), whom Paloma dubs “the Hedgehog” because she is prickly on the outside, refined on the inside. When an elegant Japanese man, Mr. Ozu (Togo Igawa), moves in with his cats, he helps Paloma and Mrs. Michel come out of their shells. All this drama, adapted from Murial Barbery’s novel by writer/director Mona Achache, unfolds at a snail’s pace; Achache layers her film with some nice visuals and even a nifty bit of animation, but it is all just lipstick on a pig. —Gary M. Kramer (Ritz Five)

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THE HELP|C The Help maintains an air of glossy nobility, sanctifying every one of its characters for their courage while shielding its eyes from hard truths at every turn. For all of its Oprah’s Book Clubbiness, the source novel at least maintained that very real threat of violence and abuse that any AfricanAmerican faced by stepping out of line — lines constantly redefined by their angry and frustrated white neighbors and employers. But Tate Taylor places his emphasis squarely on crowd-pleasing, alternating scenes of quiet, dignified suffering with those silly racist, rich white folk showing their true colors. Its prevailing mood is self-congratulatory, tsk-tsk-ing bigotry from the safe haven of its own more enlightened era. —S.B. (UA Riverview) MIDNIGHT IN PARIS|B+ No filmmaker has been so self-aware and yet so trapped by his own neuroses as Woody Allen. Midnight in Paris is his latest auto-diagnosis, recognizing his chronic discontent and romanticization of an ideal other time, other place. That would be 1920s Paris, which screenwriter Gil (Owen Wilson) pines for as his own gilded age. Despite his role as chronicler of modern intellectual life, Allen has never shied away from leavening his films with fantasy, and the latest iteration results in his best film in recent memory. —S.B. (Ritz Five)

ONE DAY|B+ Can a man and a woman be friends without letting love get in the way? One Day may be the umpteenth film this year to address that thorny question, yet only heartless cynics will be bothered by the familiarity of this shamelessly irresistible romantic melodrama. The “one day” in question is July 15, St. Swithin’s Day, when Emma (Anne Hathaway) and Dexter (Jim Sturgess) first meet; the film chronicles Em and Dex’s lives on the same day every year for two decades. This narrative gimmick and the film’s “live for today” message may be contrived, but director Lone Scherfig’s sure hand and fast pace makes the conceit surprisingly moving. —G.M.K. (Ritz East) OUR IDIOT BROTHER|C+ After being tricked into selling pot to a uniformed police officer, ingratiating hippie Ned serves a short stint behind bars, after which he’s forced to live successively with each of his sisters. He complicates each of these situations simply by approaching them honestly and being unable to navigate the con-

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RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES|C+

THE SMURFS|F The Smurfs, brought to the screen by Raja Gosnell, possibly the most shamelessly idea-free director working today, transports a handful of the little blue buggers to Central Park to complicate — but really, enlighten — Neil Patrick Harris’ life. With action and humor squarely aimed at the youngest and least demanding of audiences, there’s also a chase through FAO Schwartz that manages to cram in as much advertising as an entire season of the old Saturday morning cartoon. Cynical, Crass, Aggravating and Joyless aren’t named onscreen, but they’re the Smurfs who make the most impression. —S.B. (UA Riverview) THE TREE OF LIFE|A-

✚ REPERTORY FILM AWESOME FEST Piazza at Schmidts, Second Street and Germantown Avenue, theawesomefest. com. Shut Up Little Man! (2011, Australia, 90 min.): Two San Francisco punks record an argument between their crotchety neighbors, creating one of the world’s first viral audio recordings. Thu., Sept. 1, 8 p.m., free.

THE BALCONY 1003 Arch St., 215-922-6888, thetroc. com. Everything Must Go (2010, U.S., 97 min.): Will Ferrell plays a relapsed alcoholic who throws a yard sale to jump-start his life. Tue., Sept. 6, 8 p.m., $3.

COLONIAL THEATRE 227 Bridge St., Phoenixville, 610-9171228, thecolonialtheatre.com. Pieces (1982, U.S., 89 min.): A chainsaw killer slices his way through a college campus in the attempt to stitch together a person with multiple body parts. Fri., Sept. 2, 9 p.m., $10. M*A*S*H (1970, U.S., 116 min.): Robert Altman’s film that spawned the iconic television show. Sun., Sept. 4, 2 p.m., $10.

SARAH’S KEY|D

“ONE OF THE MOST MOST VITAL VITAL DOCS DOCS TO TO EMERGE EMERGEABOUT ABOUT THE FINANCIAL CRISIS CRISIS IN IN AMERICA. AMERICA.””- -THE THEHOLLYWOOD HOLLYWOODREPORTER REPORTER

640 Waterworks Drive, 215-6850723, fairmountwaterworks.com.

704 South St., 215-413-0999, woodenshoebooks.com. The Circle (2000, Iran, 90 min.): A group of women struggles with extreme oppression and sexism to make it in today’s Iran. Sun., Sept. 4, 7 p.m., free.

MEDIUM RARE CINEMA Video Library, 7141 Germantown Ave., 215-247-3020, regrettablesincerity. com. Roadracers (1994, U.S., 95 min.): A pre-fame David Arquette and Salma Hayek star in this ode to Rebel Without a Cause-type films of the 1950s. Followed by an episode screen-

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IT EIGHT GREAT: At a.kitchen, smoky curls of grilled Spanish rock octopus are enlivened by seared watermelon and pickled watermelon rind. NEAL SANTOS

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A.OK Rittenhouse’s a.kitchen is not your average hotel restaurant. By Adam Erace A.KITCHEN | AKA Rittenhouse Square, 135 S. 18th St., 215-825-7030,

akitchenphilly.com. Breakfast Mon.-Fri., 7-10:30 a.m.; lunch Mon.-Fri., 11:30 a.m.-4 p.m.; dinner Sun.-Thu., 5-10 p.m.; Fri.-Sat., 5-11 p.m.; brunch Sat.-Sun., 8 a.m.-4 p.m. Vegetables, $8-$14; seafood, $12-$16; meat, $14$39; dessert, $8.

en in the morning in Rittenhouse Square. A slate-gray standard poodle preens on the sidewalk in front of a.kitchen, the new all-day eatery carved from the lobby of Korman Communities’ AKA hotel. Its owner, wearing expensive running gear and a more expensive nose, sips coffee, thumbs a BlackBerry and More on: snubs the dude who stops to canoodle her poodle as if he were a homeless man asking for change. The farce unfolds in view of my neat round table, where it feels like I have nothing else to do today but relax, watch the world and consume my recommended daily intake of carbohydrates, one butter-drenched pancake at a time. All around me in the restaurant, well-rested diners appear to be after the same noble pursuit. And a.kitchen makes that pursuit easy. The unhurried pace. The parade of shiny pastries along the white-marble bar. The second cappuccino I order because, what the hell, I’m on vacation.

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Except I’m not. I live here. And I have to be at work in 15. Apparently so does the guy petting the aloof pooch out front. He bounds into a.kitchen and is on the line a moment later, organizing his station in the 150-square-foot, counter-wrapped open kitchen. Off to the side, a.kitchen chef Bryan Sikora, of Django and Talula’s Table acclaim, is talking housemade English muffins with his breakfast chef, a soldier who works 6 a.m. to noon before heading off to his second job, as garde manger at Le Bec-Fin. This morning, Sikora doesn’t seem completely pleased with the muffins, but mine is as soft as a cloud with a crust that comes from being cooked on the flattop griddle. The heavenly breads are quickly becoming a calling card of a.kitchen, just as a.kitchen will become a calling card of all AKA properties. Or at least that’s the plan according to David Fields, the onetime restaurateur (Salt) and restaurant critic (Philly Mag) who’s overseen the concept’s development from the beginning. So who’s overseeing the spicing of the MORE FOOD AND muffin’s zesty sausage patties? Tucked DRINK COVERAGE between the nooks and crannies, it reads AT C I T Y P A P E R . N E T / more macaroni dinner than breakfast M E A LT I C K E T. sandwich, something a little brown sugar or maple syrup would counteract. There’s a fried egg in there, too, but the yolk is as firm as a new mattress, and like any serious sandwich, this one needs cheese. So did the mushroom-and-Taleggio crêpes I had at dinner a week earlier. Dusted in pecorino and browned beneath a salamander, the envelopes were crunchy as Cheez-Its and held precious little Taleggio, a fromage whose funky personality is rarely this shy. >>> continued on page 42

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³ JON REINER, the the James Beard-winning writer who penned Esquire’s“How Men Eat” series, was once himself unable to eat. Debilitated by complications from Crohn’s disease, a “bizarre strain of steerage-class masochism” that causes the immune system to attack its own gastrointestinal tract, the New Yorker was forced by his doctors to adopt an NPO (from the Latin nil per os, or “nothing by mouth”) lifestyle, hooking his deteriorating body up to a food pump in the hopes his excruciating symptoms would abate. Expanding on a 2009 Esquire article, Reiner’s The Man Who Couldn’t Eat (Gallery, Sept. 6) knocks the conventional food memoir on its bloviated head, chronicling with passion and candor what it’s like to waste away — and what it’s like to come back. While the pages of many a scribe’s epicurean remembrances are swollen with engorged passages about mystical meat or wisdom whispered across a gnocchi board, The Man Who Couldn’t Eat deals with shit differently. That’s meant in a literal sense — most food writers shy away from anything even resembling a digestive reference, but Reiner is honest about his violent disease, which leads to his avuncular physicians branding him NPO. The damage of the extreme medical decision lingers even after he’s permitted to eat orally again.“I am an empty vessel into which the last hope for healing is being spooned,” writes Reiner, “only to pass unnoticed and flood out as unstoppable diarrhea.” It’s cruel that Reiner is forced to view eating as “fickle medicine.” Nowhere is this more apparent than during his months-long at-home ordeal, hooked up to a feeding pump (“like living in a blender”) as his worried wife and two young children carry on as normally as they can. Since the sight of their sickly dad upsets his sons, Reiner chooses to excuse himself from the family dinners he’d always held in such meaningful regard (“mealtime now comes with regular servings of separation anxiety”). Patching us in to his tortured internal monologue, Reiner takes us on a Diving Bell and the Butterfly-style ride, his every outside-the-glass craving turned self-destructive by his body’s betrayal. The memoir is scattered with Reiner’s vivid recollections of food — childhood trips to Katz’s Deli, emancipating vacations in Maine, hot empanadas with his boys — and they’re scattered with quiet symmetry across the expanse of Reiner’s nightmare. Though the interminable disposition of his struggle to return to the land of the eating leads to overblown description in spots, The Man Who Couldn’t Eat is unlike any food memoir you’ve ever read. (drew.lazor@citypaper.net)

food

HUNGER GAMES

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f&d

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✚ A.OK

[ food & drink ]

<<< continued from page 41

a.kitchen is a less circus-y Parc and a more relevant Rouge. There were also boorish beef kebabs, glazed in citrus-y barbecue sauce and served with garlicky broccoli rabe befitting Villa di Roma, as well as a massive Marcona almond “macaroon” as heavy as a paperweight. (It’s actually a French macaron, despite the menu’s spelling, which indicates the cookies sold at fudge “shoppes” on the Ocean City boardwalk.) I wasn’t sure whether to eat it or hurl it at my flighty server when I was ready for the check. Fortunately, I found plenty to like from Sikora’s catalog of interesting but approachable small plates. Divided into vegetables, seafood and meat, there may be too many of them, resulting in long delays between courses, but they’re mostly worth the wait. Take the housemade burrata, which seeped ivory cream into fruit salad of gem-cut cantaloupe, watermelon and honeydew. Sikora tops the dish with crispy shavings of country ham from Matt Ridgway, the charcutier who sells his PorcSalt wares at the Rittenhouse farmers market. Sweet, salty and creamy, the starter is part prosciutto e melone, part Caprese and wholly delicious. Watermelon appeared again, both the juicy, steak-like meat (cubed and seared) and the pickled rind alongside smoky curls of grilled Spanish rock octopus, another triumph. Sweet corn broth set the tone for the suave risotto mined with tender shreds of Lancaster chicken leg, and tart lemon curd with a stack of buttery shortbread cookies redeemed the macaroon disappointment. My favorite dinner dish by far was gnocchi, which rendezvoused with diced summer squash, béchamel and luscious house-smoked haddock in a buttered gratin dish. It was unexpected and novel, two adjectives rarely used to describe food at hotel restaurants. Then again, a.kitchen is much more than just a hotel restaurant. It also makes sense in the city’s dining fabric, with a chef whose name you know instead of some corporate yahoo who doesn’t know us. It’s a less circus-y Parc, a more relevant Rouge, and the Rittenhouse beau monde has taken notice. In seersucker blazers and Stone Harbor tans, they spilled out the restaurant’s open front when I arrived for my dinner reservation. And more still were trying to get inside, where white marble surfaces, charcoal tiling and a low ceiling of white-oak planks lends a.kitchen the look of a luxe Swedish sauna. The only massages here are verbal ones, often directed at the willowy hostesses by smarmy sweet-talkers looking for a table with no reservation. I’ll give it to these girls; a.kitchen attracts some pushy people, but its gatekeepers stayed gracious as the shutouts sulked off. The rejected should try returning in the morning. Back at breakfast, the pancakes are ethereal, with crisp, buttertanned edges and fluffy middles, and the bowl of austere Greek yogurt attractively furnished fresh berries and Malvern-based Laura’s granola. As the minutes tick by, tourists polish off their chorizo frittatas and Bloody Marys and depart, patting themselves on their savvy backs for choosing such a fashionable base camp.You’d think I’d be jealous of them, but they should be jealous of me. I’m the one who gets to eat here whenever I want. (adam.erace@citypaper.net)

feedingfrenzy By Drew Lazor

³ NOW SEATING Cook | Audrey Claire Taichman, who’s already got

Audrey Claire and Twenty Manning Grill, hits the 20th Street trifecta with Cook, a demonstration space, culinary center and epicurean boutique opening right after Labor Day. The former Snackbar has been overhauled and now houses a cheery test kitchen decked out with everything visiting chefs need to teach classes touching on a wide range of craveable topics; the fall schedule kicks off Sept. 6 with Le Bec-Fin’s Georges Perrier. Though teaching will be Cook’s primary focus, it also doubles as a food lover’s gift shop, offering books, kitchen tools, pantry items and other proprietary doodads. Restaurant industry folks get 10 percent off everything. 253 S. 20th St., 215-735-COOK, audreyclairecook.com. ³ WAITING LIST Pitruco Pizza | Longtime friends Eric Hilkowitz,

Nathan Winkler-Rhoades and Jonah Fligelman are taking artisan pizza on the road with Pitruco, a mobile wood-fired oven that should debut by October. They’re building a fully functional trailer oven they’ll use to crank out a taut selection of Neapolitan-inspired pizzas. The plan is to post up at 35th and Market on the regular. twitter.com/pitrucopizza. ³ LITTLE VITTLES

Look for G-Ho’s Sidecar (2201 Christian St.) to unveil its second floor in a month and a half. The new level, which will accommodate an additional 45, will have both bar and table seating. Once it’s open, owner Adam Ritter plans on tweaking hours — the bar will soon open at 10:30 a.m. daily, offering a modified brunch menu even on weekdays. ³ Garces Trading Co. (1111 Locust St.) has renovated inside — there’s now more room for walkins without reservations. ³ Resurrection Ale House (2425 Grays Ferry Ave.) is bringing back its beloved fried chicken, which left the menu last winter. The bar will celebrate its second anniversary on Sept. 21 by slingin’ nothing but chicken from opening till 5 p.m. (free nibbles from chef Joey Chmiko after); the panko-crusted bird will return to the regular menu the day after. Got A Tip? Please send restaurant news to drew.lazor@citypaper.net

or call 215-735-8444, ext. 218.

the naked city | feature | a&e | the agenda food classifieds

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H/AC/Refrigeration Instructor needed for building trades training program. Must have at least 3 years work experience plus good communication skills. FT, M-F, 7:30am -3:30pm, excellent benefits! Call 267-298-1684 to apply or send rĂŠsumĂŠ to teachatrade@yahoo.com

Drivers-NEW PAY INCREASE FOR TANK DRIVERS. Lots of Freight, Great Miles, 3 Weeks Paid Vacation, Incentives, Insurance & 401(k). Food Grade Products. CDL-A & 1 Year OTR Experience Required. Call 877-882-6537. www.OakleyTransport.com

Needed immediately for up-

CLASS A DRIVERS NEEDED: Regional or OTR Great Pay, Paid Orientation, 401K, Health Coverage, $1500 SIGN-ON BONUS THROUGH 9/30/11. ONLINE TRANSPORT 877997-8999 Apply at www.onlinetransport.com

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215-627-8200 PA â&#x20AC;˘ 302-777-2201 DE 521 S. 2ND ST. PHILA.,PA â&#x20AC;˘ APPT. ALSO AVAIL IN DE & NJ

HELP WANTED DRIVER

Driver-CDL A; Experienced OTR Drivers. Regional Lanes. HOME MOSTWEEKENDS! Up to $.50 Per Mile. 888-463-3962. 6mo. OTR exp. & CDL Reqâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d. www.usatruck.jobs HELP WANTED DRIVER

DRIVERS WANTED: $7500

lulueightball By Emily Flake

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# &$' """

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Over 42 Yrs Exp! All Work Guaranteed. Immediate Service. Licensed & Insured. Licensed #16493. PA-040852

Brooker, Richardson, Dickerson, Lee and Associates

Criminal Law, Family Law, Immigration and Personal Injury

DIABETIC TEST STRIPS NEEDED CALL: 610-453-2525

Free Consultation....Good Customer Service....Reasonable Prices.....Fights vigorously for Clients.

1500 Market Street, 12th Floor, East Tower, Philadelphia, Pa 19102 (267) 702-2026 jlee@bralawfirm.com

Most Brands Accepted. Pay up to $10 a Box

â&#x20AC;&#x153;As long as I have any choice, I will stay only in a country where political liberty, toleration, and equality of all citizens before the law are the rule.â&#x20AC;? - Albert Einstein

P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R | S E P T E M B E R 1 - S E P T E M B E R 7 , 2 0 1 1 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T |

FREE LIST of hunting land bargains in West Virginia. 100 acres & up. Loaded with wildlife. Lots of timber. Great investment. www.timberbargains.com

Potter County: 17 wooded acres bordering state forest near Keating Summit. Electric, perc, direct access to snowmobile trails. $72,900. Owner fi nancing. 800-6688679.

classifieds

for sale, king charles puppies shots and health certificates, ready to go! $550.00 717989-4235

LAND FOR SALE

the naked city | feature | a&e | the agenda | food

For Sale

food | the agenda | a&e | feature | the naked city classifieds

merchandise market

CABINETS GLAZED CHERRY Brand new, solid wood/dovetail. Crown molding. Can add or subtract to fit kitchen Cost $6400. Sell $1595. 610-952-0033 Grass Fed Beef Packages, 1/4 beef: $725, 1/2 beef: $1259. Call (717)5156160 email: beef@swissvillaLLC.com

Cash for Comics: 1940-1970’s Collectors Welcome. 215-510-4372

Laptops Net Ready, MS Office, Wireless From $170. 500 games $10, 610.453.2525

Arcade video games pinball machine jukebox. Trade for printing or new windows tntquality@aol.com 215.783.0823 BRAZILIAN FLOORING 3/4", beautiful, $2.50 sf (215)365-5826

BD MATTRESS Luxury Firm w/box sprIng Brand New Queen cost $1400, sell $299; King cost $1700 sell $399. 610-952-0033

BDRM SET: Solid Cherry Sleigh Bed, Dresser, Mirror, Chest, & 2 Nite Stands. High Quality. One month old, Must sell. Cost $6000 ask. $1500. 610-952-0033 BED A brand new Queen pillow top mattress set w/warr. $229; Full $220; King $299. Memory Foam $295. 215-752-0911

Coins, Currency, Gold, Toys, BED: Brand New Queen Pillowtop Mattress Set w/warr, In plastic. $175; Twin $140; 3 pc King $265; Full set $155. Memory foams avl. Del. avl 215-355-3878 Bedroom Set brand new queen 5 pc esp. brown $489. Del Avail 215-355-3878 MOVING SALE: Armoire, Desk, Chair, refrig, dining rm set etc. (215)441-5528 New Mattress Sets: $99, Twin, Full or Queen. Delivery avail, 215-307-1950 SECT. lthr blk, dining set,ent ctr,55" Sony TV,stat. bike, total gym, 610-203-9401

pets/livestock

54 | P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R |

S E P T E M B E R 1 - S E P T E M B E R 7 , 2 0 1 1 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T

Please be aware Possession of exotic/wild animals may be restricted in some areas.

Maine Coon Kittens, CFA reg., M/F multiple colors. (215)438-8759 SIAMESE KITTENS: Male & Female 1st shot, vet chked, reg, pedigree, choc., blue, lilac point, Nancy 610-678-0822

AMERICAN PITBULL Pups, 8 weeks, POP, $200. 215-271-0473 or 215-626-8735 AUSTRALIAN Shepherd Pups - beautiful, AKC, ch. parents, hlth guar, 215-482-6553 BEAGLE PUPS - AKC, shots, wormed, health guar, $250, 856-228-7877, aft 6p BICHON PUPS - 1st shots, wormed, registered, 2 F, 2 M, $500, 215-425-3126 Boxer BABIES AKC-Hlth Cert, shots, tails, dewclaws done by Vet. Home raised w/5 gnrtns-not kennel. Ready now 717-278-6190

CAIRN TERRIER pups, ACA, vet checked, F $700, M $400-$450. 717-989-8345 Cane Corso (Italian Mastiff) $1000 & up 609-970-0025 CANE CORSO PUPS - ACA registered, wormed, shots, $500, 267-259-2499 CHOCOLATE LABS, AKC Pups, home raised, shots, vet checked. 717-821-2287 COLLIES - good w/ kids, vet exams, AKC beauties. SW, Blue, Tri, 856-825-4856 COTON DE TULEAR PUPPIES: Adorable, Home bred, non-allergetic/shedding, 215-840-0101; www.looeycoton.com Dachshund long hair, AKC, 8 weeks, shots, vet exam, $450. 704-663-5303 Doberman Pups, cropped, $1500 & up adrkdobermans.com 856-287-6840 ENGLISH BULLDOG Puppies - ACA, s/w, health checked, $1200, 717-354-5771

GOLDEN RETRIEVER PUPS - AKC, shots, wormed, vet checked, family raised, ready to go 8/31/11, $600, 610-286-0062 G olden Retriever Teddy Bear Creme Goldendoodle puppies - first shots, vet checked, 2 yr guar. 6F 4M 570-765-5026 HAVANESE Pups, AKC, non allergic, 4M, 3F, ready for new homes 302-492-3216 Irish Setter pups, AKC, vet chkd, shots, parents our pets, $500+. (302)328-1720 IRISH SETTER Pups: reg, health cert, s/w, parents are great pets, Call now to reserve. M $750 F $650. 717-687-8530 IRISH WOLF HOUND PUPS, male & fem., AKC, ready to go. $1500 (610)331-1962 Lab Pups, AKC, s/w, home raised, health guar. 610-944-3609 or 610-506-7109

LAB PUPS: shots, wormed, vet checked, family raised, $150. (717)445-6168

Hot Tub 2011 6 person, 7ft. w/lounger 30 jets, waterfall, LED color lights. Factory warranty and cover. Still in wrapper. Cost $8000; Sell $3695. 610-952-0033

(2) Eagles Season Tickets: 8 games, Sec 132. Row 24. $2950. 609-685-2100 BUYING EAGLES SBL’s & TICKETS

LOST - Badge, if found return to Ben Franklin High School.

everything pets ENGLISH BULLDOG Pups - 3 males, vet checked, shots, call 856-716-0135 English Bulldog Pups, parents on premises, papers, shots, de-wormed, vet certified, Call 215-696-5832 (Bensalem) English Bulldogs Pups, 4 male, 3 female, out of 40 generations of champions, $2000-2500. 609-440-5153; 856-697-5305 ENGLISH MASTIFF AKC SALE! 2 females left, ready to go. Call for pricing. (lin./unlim. reg. prices) Call for apt. 856299-1366 or pure.focus@verizon.net Fox Terrier/Toy Poodle mix pups, $75 each. 1M, 1F, (717)768-0188 German Sheperd Pups 8 weeks, 3 males, sable. Call 267.243.8476 or 215.617.4574 German Shep Pups: ACA, s/w, nice guard dog,nice markings $395 717.442.5261 Goldendoodles Paper trained, home raised, great with kids, shots. Vet recommended. 610-799-0612 GOLDEN RETRIEVER PUPS: AKC, 3 beaut. males, S/W, vet chkd, farm rsd, well socialized, rdy now, $400 neg, 717.821.6041 Golden Retriever Pups: AKC, family farm raised, w/children, vet/shots/wormed, Ready to go! $500. (610)370-7597

PIANO: Mason & Hamlin Studio Grand, 2007, A92652. 5 ft 8 in., black satin finish, includes stool. Moving, must sell! $22,500. Call 609-941-1758

MALTESE Pups, 2 Males, AKC, healthy, ready now, call 215-519-6591 MALTESE PUPS - AKC, Ready to go. Call 856-875-6707 PIT BULL Pups: 1 F, 3 M, 10 wks, shots, wormed, UKC reg., $400, 215-280-4388 Pit Bull Pups, Male & Female. W/ papers, $300. (267)973-0984 Pit Bull Terrier RED DEVIL PITS $500 Firm Call for more info 609-287-1647 Poodle Standard, 10 mo. Male, housebroken, neutered, breeder raised, $1200. plabate@verizon.net (609)298-0089 Poodle Standard, pups, AKC, home raised, cream, brown, black, plabate@verizon.net (609)298-0089 PUG PUPPIES - AKC, Man’s best friend. S/W, M: $475, F: $500, 717-354-6582

Rottweiler: AKC, sire German bloodline, shots, wormed, $800. 717-445-6751 Rottweiler pups AKC, champion bloodline, family raised, vet checked, wormed $650. Call (717)445-9158

Scottish Terrier pups, ACA, vet checked, F $600-$800, M $750. (717)989-8345 SHIH TZU Pups - ACA, shots, wormed, vet checked. $400. 717-813-1580 WELSH CORGIE, Pembroke male, 3.5 months, mostly house trained, wonderful puppy, good w/ kids, 215-559-4377 Yorkie mix & Malshi puppies, 2 year health guarantee, $475+ (610)913-0393 YORKIE PUPPIES - AKC, Male, 10 weeks, shots & wormed, $650, 302-697-3515 YORKIE PUPPIES: home raised, AKC reg. Starting at $650, 215-490-2243 YORKIES - AKC, 3 Females, 1 Male, shots, ready, $800, 856-430-9017

HORSE WEDDING CARRIAGE, White, vis-a-vis Green velvet interior, built in CD player/speakers, beautiful condition, asking $4,800/obo. (856)453-5955 Reg. APHA Colt - Tobiano, 2 years old, Palimino & white, shots & wormed, $500, 609-364-4360

CALL 215-669-1924

EAGLES TICKETS for sale, uppers, lowers & hot ones, individual games or full season books available. Books come with playoff rights. (310)667-0083 PHILLIES Tickets for sale, in field boxes only. Individual games or packages available. Uppers & Lowers for all postseason games. (310)667-0083

WANTED: EAGLES SEASON TICKETS. Top $ paid. Call 800-786-8425

33&45 RECORDS HIGHER $ REALLY PAID

** Bob 610-532-9408 **

33 & 45 Records Absolute Higher $

* * * 215-200-0902 * * *

Books -Trains -Magazines -Toys Dolls - Model Kits 610-689-8476 Diabetic Test Strips! $$ Cash Paid $$ Local pick-up, Call Martin 856-882-9015

jobs Housekeeper,etc,PT-FT,5 yrs exp,3 refs, car, bkgd chk, Overbrook, 215-290-2100 Housekeeper needed in Newtown, PA (Bucks County) 3-7pm daily on wkdays, must drive, Call 609-760-8212 aft 5pm

Gentleman w/Truck Desires Work Moving & Junk Removal. 215-878-7055 Heating & Plumber des position No job too big or small, John 215.232.9751 I desire a position and have extensive history of clerical and confidential mail exp. Customer service & computer skills exp., plus a successful military career, proficient in mail room/clerical assistance. email: Lwilson68@gmail.com NURSES AID desires private duty. Exp & refs. Univ City area pref’d. 215-386-0360

Trains, Hummels, Sports Cards. Call the Local Higher Buyer, 7 Dys/Wk

Dr. Sonnheim, 856-981-3397

I Buy Anything Old...Except People! antiques-collectables, Al 215-698-0787 JUNK CARS WANTED Up to $250 for Junk Cars 215-888-8662 Lionel/Am Flyer/Trains/Hot Whls $$$$ Aurora TJet/AFX Toy Cars 215-396-1903 SAXOPHONES, WWII, SWORDS, related items, Lenny3619@aol 609.581.8290

apartment marketplace 319 Gates Street 2BR/2BA 610-405-6213

$1,350

12xx S. 17th 2br $585+ new paint & carpet, call 610-710-1986 15xx 9th St . Large apt, heat & hot water incl, new w/w, no pets. (856)430-2900

apartment marketplace 62xx Jefferson 3rd fl, 2BR apt, w/w crpt, kitc, gd area in the city 215-400-1518 7XX North 63rd St. 2BR $800 Apt. with deck. Owner pays heat. 1st, last, sec. 609-315-1259.

Golf View Apts nw carpets 1br/1ba $695 www.perutoproperties.com 215.740.4900 Various 1, 2 & 3 BR Apts $625-$850 www.perutoproperties.com 215.740.4900

Balwynne Park 2 BR $840+ W/D, C/A, W/W, Garage. 484-351-8633

23XX Van Pelt St. 1BR/1BA $500/mo. Renovated $1000 to move in. SSI and Disabilty ok’d 215-416-0839.

24xx N. 29th St. 2BR, 3rd fl $525+ utils $1575 mve in,Section 8 ok,267-978-8480 20xx Federal St: Lg, modern Efficiency call between 9a-5p (267)516-0977 Broad St. 1br/1ba $600 nice, lg kit, dck, dw, gd, wd 215.465.5449

56xx W. GIRARD lge 2+ BR , 3rd fl, w/w, new paint, refrig, $650+ 267-645-9421 69th & Elmwood vic 1br $525+elec 1st floor, large yard, (215)821-8858 69th & Woodland lrg 1 BR $650 1st flr, new renov, must see 215.868.8507

40th & Cambridge 1BR $535 Free utils, 3 mo mv in,Scott: 215.222.2435 50th & Haverford 1BR $560 & up Lg kitch & bath, sec+rent.215-747-4049 52xx Delancey St. Studio $450 clean, 1st & 2 mo dep, Sec 8 215.236.5473 54xx Walnut St lg 2 BR $650 3 mo. move in, avail now! 215-242-6694 61st & Arch Studio Apt $450/mth Recently Renovated, $1000 to move in. Call Chase 215-881-6730. 6xx N 52nd St. 2 BR $600 2nd floor, liv. rm, din. rm, kitchen, balcony 215-477-2766 or 267-934-9167 882 N 41st small 1BR $560 2 month sec + 1 month rent 215.300.9382 9xx S. 58th 2Br $675+electric newly renov., 1st/last/sec. 215-718-5980 Parkside Ave lrg 1 BR $600 high ceiling, $1200 move-in. 215-219-1715 Walnut St 1br $550+utils 2br $695+utils renovated, 215-471-1365; 215-663-0128

2xx N. 52nd St Efficiency & 2 BR Nr new El transp. Sec 8 ok 484.358.0761

33rd & Gordon 1 BR $500 newly renovated, call 267-273-6542 33RD ST. 1 & 2 BR $625 & up newly renov, near Univ 215.227.0700, 9-5

1, 2, 3, 4 Bedroom FURNISHED APTS LAUNDRY - PARKING 215-223-7000

2043 N Carlisle 2BR $1,000+utils newly renov, 215-908-4538 Broad St Efficiencies & Apts $550 & up furn/unfurn, utils incl, newly renovated Stacey 215-236-1612 or 302-345-6334

45xx Old York Rd lg 2 BR, $625+utils 1st/last & sec,$1875 move in 215.791.2125 46xx Broad St. 2br $800+utils 1st, last, sec 215.329.2863 / 215.229.2433

58xx N. 4th 2BR/2Ba $725 newly renovated, Call (215)914-0712 Residential Life: Studio, 1Br & 2Br apts Spacious & Bright Apts near LaSalle Univ. Regional Leasing Office-5600 Ogontz Ave Call or Come in M-F 9a-5p 215.276.5600 Section 8, Students & Seniors Welcome.

22xx W. Tioga 1 Br $600/ 3 mo adv Newly renov, 215.229.2433; 215.329.2863 3331 N 16th St. 3BR /BA $800 Your next home is near Temple Medical school. Spacious apt, hardwood floors, plush carpet in the bedrooms. Beautiful cabinets & tons of countertop space. Quiet Block, full-sized washer & dryer. Call today! I have others t oo! 267-312-6852 40xx Old York Rd Efficiency $475/mo. $900 move in req. (267) 456-9403

399 E Upsal 2 BR $700 1st floor, backyard, basement, 1 mo. rent & 1 mo. security, call 215-285-1375 GREENE & HARVEY - FALL SPECIAL! Lux. 1BR’S Newly dec, w/w, g/d, a/c, ca ble ready, Laundry/Beauty parlor/off st prkg. 215-275-1457 215-233-3322 W. Mt. Airy 142 W Sharpnack 1br $575+ 3rd flr, washer/dryer 215-849-6205

1929 W Colonial St. 2br $870+utils sec 8 ok, nw crpts, grb disp 267.582.6463 2xx W. Grange 3 BR/1.5 BA $745+ utils, beautiful apt, yard, 215-805-6455 64xx N. 16th St 1br $675+utils fin. bsmnt, 1st floor, no pets or smoking, Call 215-765-1611 or 215-593-5479 65th Ave 1 BR $525 h/w flrs,nr trans, avl immed,610.527.8547 6751 N 13th 1-2br $495 -$595 new paint & carpet, Call 215-316-7117 70xx Forest Ave 2br $650+utils 1st floor duplex, newly renovated, available immediately, 215-224-2953

Frankford & Castor 1BR $495+utils wall/wall, $1485 move in, 215.743.0503

32XX RED LION RD. 2br $850+utils Price includes water and appliances. Call 267-515-9248 3rd & Godfrey 1br $565 incl water w/w, 2nd flr, 1st, last & sec. 267.251.5675 53xx Akron 1 BR $650+ elec 2nd flr, 1st & last to move in, 215.651.1140 Academy & Grant 2 BR $675+ util 1st flr, dplx, bsmnt, no pets, 215-934-7181 Philmont 2 BR duplex, 2nd flr $820+ C/A, bsmnt, yard, garage, (215)752-1091 PHILMONT HEIGHTS 2 BR 1st flr $795 new kitch, w/w & paint, gar, 267.467.1596 Pratt St. 1 BR duplex $435+utils Newly renov, ample prkng 856.414.9200

WARMINSTER Lg 1-2-3 BR Sect. 8 OK Great Move-in Specials!! Pets & smoking ok. We work with credit problems. Other unit sizes available. Call for Details: 215-443-9500

Paoli 1br heat & hot water included off st prkg, hdwd flrs, (610)783-7726

2xx E Walnut Ln, nice lrg rms w/ wood floors, $100/wk & up (267)912-9644 33rd & Ridge Ave. $100-125/week. Large renovated furnished rooms near Fairmount Park & bus depot. 215-317-2708. 41xx Old York Rd., lg furn rms, nwly ren, w/w $85-$100/wk, must see 215-552-5200 42xx Frankford, $450/mo 2nd Flr rm, private entr, kit & Ba, clean 267-979-0413 45th & Lancaster; 63rd & Market; 52nd & Race;29th & Cumberland. 215.290.8702 4900 MARVINE ST: $110/wk, kitchen priv., no smoking/drugs. 215-436-2060 • 55th & Media • Hunting Park • 55th & Girard • 54th & Lancaster Share Kitchen & Bath, $350 & up No sec dep, SSI OK. 215-758-7572 55th/Thompson furn $115/$135 wk frig micro priv ent $200 sec. 215-572-8833 56th and Walnut $90-$110 week Access to kit, utils incl. 267-230-5875 61xx Vine St. - furnished rooms for rent, kitchen use, $125/wk, 267-495-4878

A1 Nice, well maintained rms, N & W Phila. Starting @ $115/wk 610-667-0101 Broad & Olney deluxe furn rms priv ent. $110 & $145/wk Sec $200. 215-572-8833 BROAD St: Move in Special $190, Large cln furnished rms,w/w crpt,215-681-3896 C & Roosevelt Blvd. rm priv house, conv to shops, trans. & Temple Univ. $100/wk, $400 move-in. Call 856-217-2477 Delaware Co. Newly renov, close to trans. $100/wk 1st wk FREE 267.628.7454 Frankford, room in apt, furn, no drugs, near El, $85/wk+ $300 sec. 215-526-1455 Germantown Area: NICE, Cozy Rooms Private entry, no drugs (215)548-6083 Germantown Ave, rm prv BA, $140/wk paid bi-wkly & 2 week dep. 267.338.9870 Hunting Park: Fully Furn Luxury Rooms. Free utils/cable, Avail now, 267-331-5382 LaSalle Univ. Area: ROOM FOR RENT Renovated, HW floors, 1.5 Shared BA, full shared kitchen, Patio, 215-850-6618, Max MT. AIRY (Best Area) $135/week. SSI ok, 215-730-8956 N Phila, lrg room, king sized bed, use of kitch, utils incl, SSI & SSD ok215.307.2645 N. Phila Rooms for rent $85-$100/week plus 1 month sec. Call 215-669-0912 N Phila: Rooms for rent. Furnished, w/d, $400-$500/mo+cable. (215)221-5538 N Phila/W Phila/Logan,pvt ent,$75-$110 wk, pvt BA/kit, $140 wk 609-877-0375 SW,N, W Move-in Special! $90-$125/wk Room sharing avail. SSI ok, 215-220-8877 SW Phila - Elmwood, nice room, use of entire house. 267-972-7242 W. & N. Phila. nice rooms, well maint., kitchen privileges, utils incl 215-350-6626

12th & Wolf 2 BR/2 BA $1300 furnished, totally renovated, 215-718-5172 15xx S Bailey, Gray’s Ferry 3Br/1Ba $775 New carpets, flooring, fresh paint. Convenient block. Big patio. 215-228-1060 19xx Wilder St. 2br $900 newly renov, sec 8 ok. 267-467-0140

45xx N Mole St. 3BR $700+ utils $2250 mv in,Section 8 ok, 267-978-8480

13xx Narrangassett 3br/2ba $800+utils Near Asbury Park. 267-973-1961 Pulaski Ave 3BR/1.5BA $950 Germantown Home Newly Renovated Section 8 ok. 215-939-3745

201 N. Wilton St. 4Br/1Ba $800 Utils HW flr, new kitchen, security system $2400 to move in. Call 215-919-8700.

70xx Saybrooke Ave. 2Br/1Ba $670 Avail Immed., Sec 8 OK. 267-467-7163

1661 Robinson St 3 BR $825 NO DRUGS! 267-259-0430 38xx W. Girard Ave 5 BR/2 BA $1200 rear deck, $3000 move in, 215-365-4567 5209 Florence Ave. 3br/1ba $ 850+utils Newly Renovated, 1st, last & 1 month security required, (215)477-8254 56th & Christian 3 BR $750+ utils clean, must see, 610-587-3245 56th & Lansdowne 3br/1ba $850+ sec 8 ok, front porch, yard 610-649-9009 56xx Christian St 3br/1.5ba $800+utils 3 month req. to move in (215)248-0547 57xx Cedar Ave 4 BR/1 BA $1000+utils 1st/last & security, 267-253-0953 9xx S 58th St lg 2 BR $600+ utils fresh paint,great condition, 215-416-5862 Philadelphia 3br $800 1st and last to move in, $35 application fee, available now. Call 215-803-8876 W. Phila 1br-4br Apts & Houses, $700$975. 1st/last/sec. 215-878-2857

5016 Cedar Ave 5 BR/4 BA $1700 renov,hrdwd flrs, fin bsmnt, 215.880.3378

35xx Braddock St, 19134 PHA SEC 8 OK 2 br, 1 ba, 1 blk from public transp, front porch, back yard, washer, dryer, refrig. $700/month, plus util. 215-946-6000

Jasper St. 3 BR $750+ Close to Church, schools, Tioga station. open porch, d/w & w/d. 201-321-0543

Monmouth & Jasper 4 BR/1 BA $1000 porch,$2000 mv in,no pets, 215.559.9289

50xx Ditman 4 BR Section 8 approved, 215-205-9910 57xx Tulip 2br Section 8 approved, 215-205-9910

9xx Carver 3BR $750 avail 9/1, nr schl, new paint 610.710.1986 Castor Gardens Big 3BR/1.5BA $900+ garage, basement, no pets, 215-750-3612 Cottman/Castor vic. 3br/1.5ba $1000+ utils, Free Storage! 267-401-7375

7xx W Rockland 4br/1.5ba $1100 fully renov, sec 8 ok. 267-467-0140

$400, Call 856-365-2021

JUNK CARS WANTED 24/7 REMOVAL. Call 267-377-3088

ESCAPE XLT 4x4 2003 $7,450 exc cond,lo mi, runs smooth267.670.6703

YUKON DENALI V8 2005 $18,000 70k mi,ex cond,runs great, 267.304.6652

FORD Conversion Van 2001 $7900 90k, TV, all pwr, high top (215)681-8323

Scion 2007 $10,500 35K miles, silver, call 267-238-7327

HD FDXL Low Rider 2007 $10,900 2500 mi, garaged,like new, cobalt/pewter color, PA insp, many extras, 302.426.1923

Monte Carlo ’10: 40’, 4 slides, 2br, $28k /bo, w/d, c. ht/air, extras 610.470.7039

CHEVY Z71 SILVERADO 4x4 1996 $5500 5spd, many new parts, 155k 215.870.4681

low cost cars & trucks Cadillac Sedan DeVille 1999 $1500 rns & looks great, AC, 100K 267.582.9961

Isuzu Rodeo LS 1999 $2950 4x4, loaded, like new (215)840-4860

Chevy Cavalier 1999 $2400 4 cylinder, 55k, auto, white 610.825.3533

MAZDA Protege 1994 $1575 mint, 5 speed, A/C, 78k, 4 cylinder, 35 mpg, 1 owner, runs new, 215-620-9383

Chevy Lumina 1991 $950 auto, cold a/c, new insp. 215-620-9383 Chrysler Concorde 1997 $2500 78K orig. mi, mint, insp. 610-667-4829

OLDSMOBILE LS 1999 $2300 mint cond,loaded, new insp, 610.203.6561

CHRYSLER Sebring 2006 $4600 50k mi, 4 dr, 4 cyl, clean, 215-850-5702

Toyota Camry LE 1994 $2250 4 cyl, all powers, xtra clean, sunrf, new insp, runs new, nds nothing 215.620.9383

FORD Escort LX 1996 $1350 auto, cold a/c,4 cyl, 94k mi, 215.620.9383

VOLVO 940 1995 $1750 auto,a/c,4 cyl,109k,rns new 215.620.9383

Frankford & Torresdale area 3 BR Sect. 8 approved, call 267-939-6965 Knorr St. 4 BR/1.5 BA $980 Large EIK, big back yard. 917-379-7302 Weikel St 2BR $700 renov, nw carpet, backyard. 917.379.7302

DARBY 3 BR row Section 8 ok, 610-529-3531

$985+ utils

Sharon Hill, 815 Green Hill Rd 2 BR $795 1 mo rent, 1 mo sec, no pets 610.586.5562 Upper Darby 3Br/1Ba Row $900+utils garage, backyard, Call (610)202-9292

MOORESTOWN 3BR/2BA $1,450+utils sgl fam,c/a, 856.912.2647 / 609.314.3945

619 W. Norris St. 3BR/1.5BA $1350. Neg. Water included, gas heat, newly renovated. 267-770-2718.

Junk Cars & Trucks Wanted,

Fishtown (Riverside) 3br/2ba $1200+ laundry rm, modern house, updated kitch, Bridesburg 4br/2ba $1000 267.266.2514

OVERBROOK 3 BR $1150 newly remodeled, finished basement, Section 8 ok, call 215-680-4049

24th & Lehigh Area Sect. 8 ok new paint, near transp, (610)337-2244 24xx W. Toronto 3br/1ba $725+utils newly renov, s/s fridge, carpet & hdwd, porch, backyard, w/d. 267-228-4538 25xx N Gratz St 3br/1ba $695+utils washer, lrg kitch, sec 8 ok (215)425-3696 27xx N 25th St. 3 BR/1 BA $800 w/w crpt, a/c, sec alarm (215)744-8338 29XX N. Taney 3 BR/1 BA $550+utils good credit only,$1650 mvn 201.871.0856 3614 N. Bouvier St. 3 BR $800 near Temple School of Med., 215.301.4943 36xx N Gratz 4 BR $875 $875 dep. renov, Sec 8 ok, 215-298-3977

MAGNUM 2007 $10,999 black on black, exc cond, 302-345-0176

86xx Thouron 3BR $1050 corner prop,grt loc,avail now610.710.1986

7xx E Allegheny large 2br/1.5ba $700+ newly renovated, Call 215-836-1960 10xx S 51st 4 BR $875+ utils newly renov,hdwd flr & cpt, 215-416-5862 60xx Reinhard St. 3 BR frnt prch & bk yd, Sec 8 ok. 215.356.2434

JUNK CARS & TRUCKS

$200 Cash & Up (267)241-3041

2xx Tusculum St. 2 BR $525+ utils $1575 to move in, 610-876-0604 23xx Greenwich, Pt Breeze 3BR/1BA $775 1070 sqft. New heater. A/C with remote. Back patio 215-228-1060

$300 & Up For Junk Cars Call 215-722-2111

RL 2005 $17,000 74K, exc cond., all options. 610-806-6018

resorts/rent N. Wildwood 2+br apts from $99/night 2 blocks to bch/boardwalk 609.729.0561 WILDWOOD clean 2-3br, low rates Wkly Cable, pkg, nr beach 609-522-7678

Brigantine 2BR special $125/night (mid week) near beach, 856-397-0616 WILDWOOD, NJ: RUS MAR MOTEL steps to beach, pet friendly, ocean views, renovated rooms. 609-522-0101

BrierCrest 5 BR, sleeps 12; Saw Creek 3br sleeps 8, 9/5, 10/10, 11/11, 11/24, 12/25, 1/1, Wks & Wkends 609-587-9493

COLLINGDALE Efficiency $525 heat & water incl., Call Dan 610-789-3765

20th/Hunting Park-CableTV w/ all channels, A/C, micro, dorm fridge, shared bath, $360 move in, $120/wk, 215-221-5195 22nd & Hunting Park, renov, lrg rm, furn $85-$95 wk 2nd week free 215.960.1600 22xx Oakdale St, 16th xx St. Luke, $400$500/mo, kitchen priv., cable, income verification/references req. 610-716-8621 23XX Van Pelt St Renovated rooms $75/ wk. $150 move in Disabilty/SSI welcome 215-416-0839. 27xx N. Oxford St, 29th & Cecil B Moore, newly renovated, shared kitchen & bath, $90-$100/week, 267-816-3058 28xx N 27th St.: Furnished room, utils included, $100/wk, SSI ok, 267-819-5683

homes for rent

38xx N Darien St 3 BR/1 BA $750+ utils $1500 to move in, 215-439-1082

Dodge Challenger 1973 $3,100 in primer,compl car, no eng 609.567.2963

P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R | S E P T E M B E R 1 - S E P T E M B E R 7 , 2 0 1 1 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T |

13xx E. Luzerne St 2br duplex $900 complete renov, sec 8 ok 267-467-0140 18xx Harrison 1Br’s $600-$675 new renov., 3 to choose from215.914.0712 Frankford & Oxford 1 BR $580 Also Efficiency, $500. Utilities included We speak Spanish, 215-620-6261 Margaret St. 1 BR $695+ utils beautiful, newly remodeled, 215-526-1455

East Olney:furn 2 rms & ba, cable ready, $120/wk.$360 move in. 215-329-1181

W. PHILADELPHIA $100-$150/wk. 4 rooms avail. Priv. Ba 610-803-2696

automotive

classifieds

1 BR & 2 BR Apts $705-$835 spacious, great loc., upgraded, heat incl, PHA vouchers accepted 215-966-9371 5220 Wayne Ave. Studio, 1 BR & 2 BR newly rehab, 267.767.6959, Lic# 507568 Germantown 1 BR & 2 BR $500 & up newly renovated, 215-520-1542 The Fieldview Apts: 705-15 Church Ln Comfortable Living- Historic Germantown 1br $750, 2br $850 Gas,Water,Heat Free Close to Septa,Grocery,Eatery & LaSalle U. Call for appt. 215-276-5600 M-F 9-5

DARBY 1 BR $495 w/w, A/C, near transportation & shopping, private entrance. call 610-358-2438 Drexel Hill Large Efficiency near all transport., heat & water included, day 610-259-2379, eve 215-331-6947 Sharon Hill 816 Green Hill Rd 2br $695+ 1 mo sec, 1 mo rent, no pets 610.586.5562

Lawncrest: 6xx Allengrove St. 3br Section 8 ok. 215-407-2559

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