Polo Lifestyles February 2022: The Love Issue

VOLUME VI / ISSUE II / FEBRUARY 2022

SNOW POLO WORLD C U P - K IT ZBU H E L · ITALIA P OLO C HA L L EN G E S N OW PO LO S N OW P OLO WORLD C U P - ST- M O R I T Z

DIANA ROSS

FERVOR, FAMILY & FAME

BONJOUR!

GETTING AROUND PARIS LIKE A LOCAL

VULNERABILITY

AND THE ALPHA MALE

THE LOVE ISSUE

TABOO NO LONGER

JAW-DROPPING DISCUSSIONS ON ABUSE, ASSAULT AND RAPE

INSIDE THE LIFE OF THE WORLD'S MOST-POWERFUL GIRLFRIEND

STRIKE UP A ROMANCE

THE NEW NAPA VALLEY IS SOUTH OF THE BORDER

HOT SHOTS

THE AESTHETIC ALLURE OF PEPTIDE INJECTIONS

WHAT BLUE DIAMONDS TEACH US ABOUT SCIENCE

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Ambassador Claude-Alix Bertrand Publisher

Joshua Jakobitz Editor-in-Chief

William Smith

Aubrey Chandler

Copy Editor & Philanthropy Contributor

Contributing Photographer

Claire Barrett

Contributing Photographer & Polo Contributor

Head of Photography

Eva Espresso

Contributing Photographer

Cezar Kusik

Wine Contributor

Raphael K. Dapaah Art Contributor

Jyoti Paintel

Sofya Khizhik

Michael J. Snell

Lifestyles Contributor

Joey Velez

Wellness Contributor

Brett Chody

Trends Contributor

Panthil Dwivedi

Spiritual Contributor

Wellness Contributor

Justin "Goliath" Johnson

Polo Lifestyles is a publication of HT Polo Publishing Co. 995 Detroit Avenue, Suite A Concord, CA 94518

Wellness Contributor

Brand Representatives Michael J. Snell - The Hamptons Stanley Pierre-Etienne Caribbean Jessica Foret Wax - Santa Fe K & Co. Media - Los Angeles Justin Johnson - Atlanta Contributing Photographers Global Polo Media Candace Ferreira Nick Tininenko Matias Callejo Dan Jackson

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Katerina Morgan

Polo Photographer

Content Copyright © Polo Lifestyles 2021 All Rights Reserved.

For information or to advertise Contact editor@htpolo.com Read online at www.pololifestyles.com Cover Photo of Diana Ross Photo on this page

by Eva Espresso from St-Moritz

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INTERNATIONAL POLO CLUB Ylvisaker Cup U.S. Open Women’s Polo Championship® The Gauntlet of Polo C.V. Whitney Cup® USPA Gold Cup® U.S. Open Polo Championship® GRAND CHAMPIONS POLO CLUB USPA North American Cup USPA National 20-Goal Legends of Polo Carlos Gracida Memorial The International Cup AUCKLAND POLO CLUB BMW "The Polo" Open

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SCOREBOARDS & COCKTAILS

SNOW POLO WORLD CUP PERFECT CONDITIONS IN ST-MORITZ

Page 28 POLO LIFESTYLES EDITORS & CONTRIBUTORS

Ambassador Claude-Alix Bertrand Publisher Polo Lifestyles @haiti_polo_captain

Panthil Dwivedi

Wellness Contributor PanthilWrites.com @panthildwivedi

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Josh Jakobitz

Editor-in-Chief Polo Lifestyles @joshuajakobitz

Eva Espresso Photographer

Eva Espresso Photography

@eva.espresso

Claire Barrett

Head of Photography

Claire Barrett Photography

@clairebarrettphoto

Michael J. Snell

Lifestyles & Automobiles Contributor @agnello_1

Raphael K. Dapaah Art Contributor Dapaah Gallery @dapaahgallery

Aubrey Chandler Photographer Polo Lifestyles @aubreychandler

Jyoti Paintel

Spiritual Contributor Polo Lifestyles @jyotipaintel

Joey Velez

Cezar Kusik

Wine Contributor Polo Lifestyles @cezartastesearth

William Smith

Brett Chody

Trends Contributor Polo Lifestyles @brettchody

Justin Johnson

Wellness Columnist

Philanthropy Contributor

Wellness Contributor

@velezmentalhealth

@willismith_2000

@goliathcoaches

Velez Mental Performance May & Stanley Smith Charitable Trust

Goliath Coaches

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Peptide injections for everlasting youth, page 90

Is she the world's most pow- What blue diamonds teach us Fervor, Family and Fame: about science, page 79 Diana Ross, page 116 erful girlfriend? page 94

GET ROMANTIC

IN PARIS

THE CITY OF LIGHTS IS THE PERFECT DESTINATION TO RENEW OR START A NEW ROMANCE PAGE 98

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ST-MORITZ SNOW POLO

S

NOW POLO IS MY FAVORITE VARIATION OF THE ORIGINAL. THERE’S JUST SOMETHING ABOUT THE GRANDEUR, THE WINTER GLITTERATI AND FROSTY BREATH THAT LENDS SOMETHING MAGIC TO THE MOMENT. From December to January, we had the luxury of participating in four major snow polo tournaments: Aspen, Cortina (Italy), Kitzbuhel (Austria) and St-Moritz (Switzerland). The granddaddy of them all is, of course, St-Moritz. Our UK-based photographer, Eva Espresso, captured the story from St-Moritz that starts on page 28.

It wouldn’t be much of a love issue without a compelling section on romance. This year, February takes us to Paris, where we encourage you to strike up (or maybe rekindle) a romance while getting around like a local. There’s a whole section on Parisian street food that had my mouth watering as I approved layouts.

In addition to all that, we have blue diamonds, how vulnerability is sexy AF, and possibly the world’s most powerful girlfriend (hint: she’s dating Amazon’s Jeff Bezos). Our philanthropy contributor joined our resident sommelier for an expanded section on what some are calling The New Napa. Cezar Kusik spent considerable time in Mexico last year and came back an enthusiastic advocate for the region. Bill Smith actually resides in this region, and he provides his insight and favorite haunts to sample some of New Mexico’s best bubbles and vinos.

I don’t always contribute to the editorial content, but when I do it’s a chance to reconnect to my newspaper journalist beginnings. This month, I was moved, triggered and encouraged by a panel of brave women and one man who took to Instagram’s airwaves to discuss a topic that both shocked and encouraged: sexual abuse, assault and rape. Interviewing the panelists and writing the follow up was one of the more challenging things I’ve written lately.

As our copy editor reminded me recently, “The less we think these circumstances are extraordinary, the better equipped we can be to deal with them.” And I suppose that’s how this story fits into the Love Issue: understanding and dealing with circumstances, making the adjustments necessary to prevent another generation from experiencing the horrors burned in our collective memories. I have two nieces and I will give anything to protect them. Talking about this is incredibly difficult – goodness, typing it is hard enough – but so many of us have held our tongues long enough. If that isn’t love, I don’t know what is.

Best, Josh Jakobitz josh@pololifestyles.com

Beyond first class is a class of one.

INNOVATION EXISTS PURELY TO SERVE YOUR COMFORT, SAFETY AND CONVENIENCE VIA MULTIPLE SENSES. A VIRTUAL VOICE ASSISTANT LISTENS TO SERVE YOU. LIGHTING AND FRAGRANCE SUBTLY SOOTHE YOU.

CHOOSE YOUR X. THE BMW X RANGE.

NOW WITH 0% FINANCING.

MBUSA.COM

VOLUME VI / ISSUE II / FEBRUARY 2022

baccarat Every interior can be made better... just add Baccarat to any room anywhere

lucchese The real question is, Where won't you be seen wearing these in 2022?

ritzcarltonyachtcollection

Where will you dock your yacht this year... St-Barths? Monaco? Let us know page 24

chanelofficial Charlotte Casiraghi didn't so much walk the runway as ride it for Chanel Couture 2022

parkerpalmsprings The Parker gives us retro-meetsCaribbean vibes throughout the property but particularly poolside

sisleyparisofficial Only the finest will do, whether it's chocolate or lipstick

kayonjungleresort If you've ever just wanted to get away from it all and unplug, then you're in good company

mrturk Menswear for spring and summer doesn't get any cooler than Mr Turk's line for 2022

veuveclicquotusa Snow polo gives a whole new meaning to Champagne On Ice

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Click and comment on our choices... Tag @pololifestyles.

We will share noteworthy comments with you next month.

harrywinston The creative team at Harry Winston just keep give us LEWKS and we are here for it

nobasicshitofficial Lights, curves, action? This has to be one of our favorite rides to pull up in at the valet stand

violetcakeslondon If you're in London, stop by Violet Cakes for these thematic goodies for Valentines

dolcegabbana The show(s) will go on... and in Paris, couture shows did go on all week for fashion's Couture Week

philipjeffriesltd Gold-leave touches give an air of majesty that kick up the cool factor 100%

visithaiti Gingerbread homes like these are either disappearing or being restored on the island of Haiti

lebarthelemy This time of year, we love an escape to St-Barths

rafaelnadal

Rafael Nadal is all smiles after winning the Australian Open

pawsitivechangeprogram Hard-to-place dogs and prisoners connect in the Pawsitive Change Program in California page 25

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SNOW POLO WORLD CUP ST-MORITZ P H OTO GRA P H S BY E VA E SP RE SSO

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SNOW POLO WORLD CUP ST-MORITZ

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P H OTOGRAP H S BY E VA E SP RE SSO

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SNOW POLO WORLD CUP ST-MORITZ

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P H OTO GRAP H S BY E VA E SP RE SSO

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P H OTO G RA P H S BY E VA E SP RE SSO & KAT H RI N GRA LLA

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SNOW POLO WORLD CUP ST-MORITZ

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P H OTO GRA P H S BY E VA E SP RE SSO

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SNOW POLO WORLD CUP ST-MORITZ

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P H OTO G RA P H S BY E VA E SP RE SSO & W E N DY FALO U RD

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B EN D U R A BA N K SN OW POLO WOR L D CUP K I TZBÜ H EL

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P H O T O G R A P H S B Y K AT E R I N A M O R G A N

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B EN D U R A BA N K SNOW PO LO WOR L D CUP KITZBÜ H EL

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SNOW POLO

RETURNS TRIUMPHANTLY TO

KITZBUHEL

The Gaudenzis successfully brought snow polo back to Kitzbuhel after a long pandemic hiatus. Team Bodvar House of Roses, in their snow polo debut, took home the prized trophy and bragging rights.

The event in Kitzbuhel is a precursor to St. Moritz' snow polo event, played the last weekend in January.

December's snow polo cup in Aspen was also successfully held with limited attendance and controlled access.

PHOTOGRAPHS BY REINHARDT & SOMMER - FOTOGRAFEN

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B EN D U R A BA N K SNOW PO LO WOR L D CUP KITZBÜ H EL

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PHOTOGRAPHS BY REINHARDT & SOMMER - FOTOGRAFEN

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B EN DUR A BA N K SNOW POLO WOR L D C UP KITZ BÜ H EL

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PHOTOGRAPHS BY REINHARDT & SOMMER - FOTOGRAFEN

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BENDURA BANK SN OW POLO WORLD CUP K I TZBÜHEL

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PHOTOGRAPHS BY REINHARDT & SOMMER - FOTOGRAFEN

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SN OW POLO

I TA L I A P OLO CHALLENG E

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T

HE U.S. POLO ASSN. TEAM DOMINATED THE FINAL OF THE 2022 ITALIA POLO CHALLENGE CORTINA, PLAYED ON SATURDAY, JANUARY 8, AGAINST THE GOLDSPAN POLO TEAM (14-11.5) IN A FLOODLIT ARENA WITH FOOTING UNANIMOUSLY JUDGED AS PERFECT. page 54

Polo on snow has a long tradition in Cortina d’Ampezzo (first played there in 1989) and the tournament, which ended after three exciting days with four teams playing, attracted a large number of enthusiastic spectators who braved the harsh weather and enjoyed high-level sport.

The winning team, which fielded France’s Clement Delfosse (hp 5), Germany’s Patrick Maleitzke (hp 5) and Daniel Deistler (hp 0), won the day 14

to 11.5 against Goldspan, which instead fielded the Argentinean players Valentin Novillo Astrada (hp 6) and Pablo Guinazù (hp 3) as well as Luxemburg’s Bert Poeckes (hp 0).

The match was really only balanced during the first chukker, which Goldspan won 3.5 to 2 thanks to a hattrick scored by Guinazù.

After the second chukker it was practically all over. Delfosse and Maleitzke put

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ITALIA POLO CHALLENGE

P H O T O G R A P H S C O U R T E S Y I TA L I A P O LO C H A L L E N G E

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on a real show, and goal after goal created an unbeatable gap with their opponents¸ 9 to 4.5 at the end of the second chukker and then 12 to 5.5 after the third.

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ITALIA POLO CHALLENGE

P H O T O G R A P H S C O U R T E S Y I TA L I A P O LO C H A L L E N G E

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ITALIA POLO CHALLENGE

P H O T O G R A P H S C O U R T E S Y I TA L I A P O LO C H A L L E N G E

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HIGH SOCIETY

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BMW'S

FLYING CAR WINS AIRWORTHINESS CERTIFICATION

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A

FLYING CAR CAPABLE OF HITTING SPEEDS OVER 100MPH (160KMH) AND ALTITUDES ABOVE 8,000FT (2,500M) HAS BEEN ISSUED WITH A CERTIFICATE OF AIRWORTHINESS

BY THE SLOVAK TRANSPORT AUTHORITY. The hybrid car-aircraft, AirCar, is page 64

equipped with a BMW engine and runs on regular petrol-pump fuel.

It takes two minutes and 15 seconds to transform from car into aircraft.

The certification followed 70 hours of flight testing and more than 200 takeoffs and landings, the company said.

“AirCar certification opens the door for mass production of very efficient flying cars,” its creator Stefan Klein said.

“It is official and the final confirmation of our ability to change mid-distance travel forever.”

In June, the flying car completed a 35-minute flight between international airports in Nitra and Bratislava, Slovakia.

The company told BBC News it planned to fly to London from Paris in the near future.

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FLYING CAR THE FUTURE OF TRAVEL?

Steve Wright, senior research fellow in avionics and aircraft systems, at the University of the West of England, said the news was a good step down the road for the company and made him “cautiously optimistic that I am going to see a few AirCars one day - but I think there is still a way to go”.

The three-wheeled PAL-V Liberty, which flies like a gyrocopter, is road legal in Europe and working towards European Union Aviation Safety Agency certification.

Other companies are also developing vehicles that can fly and be driven on the roads.

“Are flying cars the future? Yes... and no,” he said. “The personal-transport revolution is definitely coming but not

But Wright is cautious about how much mass appeal flying cars may have.

really looking like this. From a transport point of view, it has a niche - although, a very interesting niche.”

The AirCar takes off and lands like a conventional plane and requires a pilot’s license to fly. But a number of companies are working on unpiloted air-taxi services with autonomous flight and vertical landing and take-off. Promoters hope they will be a convenient and flexible form of transport - and some are page 65

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attracting significant investment.

Boeing recently announced it was investing an additional $450m (£334m)

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into Wisk, the California-based autonomous-air-taxi company it owns with Kitty Hawk, a company launched by Google co-founder Larry Page.

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FLYING CAR THE FUTURE OF TRAVEL?

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HIGH SOCIETY

T HE BE S T-K EPT S EC R E T E N C LAV E O F T H E J E T- SET FO R DECA DES I S H OME TO A H O ST O F N E W LU X U RY DIGS THE C ARIB B E AN IS LAN D OF S T-BARTH 'S I S CALLI N G

PHOTOGRAPHS BY SLIM AARONS

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ROSEWOOD LE GUANAHANI

S

T-BARTHS IS A DESTINATION THAT’S ALWAYS IN STYLE. THE GLAMOROUS SET—CELEBRITIES, BUSINESS MAGNATES, AND THE DEEP-POCKETED IN GENERAL—HAVE GRAVITATED TO THE CARIBBEAN ISLAND AND FRENCH COLLECTIVITY FOR DECADES.

Roman Abramovich is among the high-profile names who owns a home here, and mega-yachts filled with the likes of Bill Gates and Jeff Bezos are a mainstay presence in Gustavia Harbor, especially in the week leading up to New Year’s. Regulars come for the pristine setting with nary a cruise ship in sight, uncrowded beaches, and a scene that includes buzzy beach clubs by day and chic and sophisticated dining options after dark.

And we can’t leave out the hotels, all of which are small properties and attracpage 72

tions in their own right, that see guests who check in year after year (or even more often than that). Their storied clientele includes everyone from Leonardo DiCaprio and Paul McCartney to Beyoncé and Miranda Kerr.

It may have enduring appeal, but St-Barths’ popularity appears to have reached unprecedented levels over the last few months: According to Nils Dufau, the president of the island’s tourism committee and vice president of the local government, the 500 hotel rooms in St-Barths are almost 100% booked through President’s Day, and have been since the end of October. “Normally, high season starts Thanksgiving weekend, but this year, it began a month earlier. We also see a dip in visitors in early January, but that’s not happening this season,” he says.

Another sign of the demand: Tradewind, a boutique airline company offering both scheduled and private charter flights, which operated in StBarths for 15 years and counts it as one

of its top destinations, has seen record business in the last year. Cofounder David Zipkin says that demand is up 40% in 2021 compared to the year before and well above 2019 levels (oneway flights average $500 per person).

“This is a destination that people are eager to visit, partly because it’s so glamorous and beautiful and partly because COVID-19 cases have been very low on the island,” he says. “It feels safe.”

The pandemic didn’t get in the way of development on St-Barths, particularly on the luxury hotel front where travelers have new and exciting reasons to book a stay.

The just opened Rosewood Le Guanahani St. Barth is getting the biggest buzz. The resort first opened in 1986 but is now branded as a Rosewood.

Spanning 18 acres, it’s set on a secluded peninsula and overlooks the beaches of Marechal Bay and Grand Cul-de-Sac Lagoon. The design is a collaboration between David M. Schwarz Architects, behind high-profile projects such as

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EDEN ROC

the American Airlines Center in Dallas, and Luis Pons Design Lab. It’s heavy on three colors: turquoise, in a nod to the surrounding ocean; yellow, inspired by the sun; and lavender, evoking the South of France.

Le Guanahani has 66 rooms, all designed as residential-style freestanding spaces with either ocean or garden views, a Beach House with an ocean facing restaurant (some of the best food on the island) and cocktail lounge, and a world-class spa with an outdoor relaxation area. Guests have their pick of unique experiences such as tours of hidden beaches throughout St-Barths, guided hikes, and wellness activities like morning yoga at scenic spots.

Next up, the island’s It hotel, Eden Rock - St Barths, open since the 1950s, recently debuted anew after a two-year extensive renovation following the impact of Hurricane Irma in late 2017.

AD100 designer Martin Brudnizki and the locally based Architectonik St Barths worked on a redesign that includes new

suites and rooms, a restaurant helmed

by Jean-Georges Vongerichten that focuses on sustainability by favoring local produce and seafood, and a beach bar. A spa with treatments from skincare guru Dr. Barbara Sturm is also new, and

owner Jane Matthew has expanded her art collection within the property with pieces by emerging artists via the New York Academy of Art. Le Sereno, another choice property for page 73

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the chic crowd, has new Suites Piscine— rooms with a 30-foot-long swimming pool and an expansive outdoor area with a wooden deck and Christian Liaigre furniture. They can be combined with a bungalow for larger groups.

The go-to hotel for privacy seekers, Le Toiny, reopened this fall with a surf shack, refreshed interiors by Lady Bee Osborn, and two new four-bedroom villas—including the onetime home of ballet legend Rudolf Nureyev, with moody, shipshape interiors and a waterfront terrace so broad he could practically dance on the waves. The other, called Villa Over the Ocean, is a contemporary counterpoint, with white walls and beach chic decor. It spans

7,000 square feet and has a swimming pool, tropical garden, and a deck with a gazebo and bar.

Set in the hillside, Villa Marie SaintBarth has launched Gyp Sea Beach Club.

Located on the Bay of St. Jean, it has a bohemian design with oversized mismatched pillows and driftwood furniture. There’s also a restaurant where almost every dish is roasted and a bar with creative cocktails and a DJ spinning upbeat Caribbean music. Guests can enjoy a myriad of diversions at Gyp Sea such as morning yoga, paddling, and snorkeling.

Another hillside property, Hôtel Barrière Le Carl Gustaf St Barth, is new to the hotel lineup and offers panoramic LE SERENO

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views of the port of Gustavia. It has 21 rooms, all ocean facing, and a design from French designers Gilles & Boissier that emphasizes natural materials such as wood and stone. The restaurant, Le Fouquet’s Saint-Barth, is the same as the iconic brasserie in Paris and has a menu created by the legendary chef Pierre Gagnaire. His simple baked mahi-mahi on a bed of lime and tataki of red tuna are must-order dishes.

Whether St-Barths is your favorite spot to vacation or you’re considering visiting for the first time, the hotels on the island offer plenty of discoveries that warrant planning a getaway.

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HOTEL BARRIERE LE CARL GUSTAF

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PHOTOGRAPHS COURTESY GQ

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W H AT T H E OKAVANGO B LU E

DIAMOND

CAN T E ACH U S AB OU T SC IE NC E

F

EW OF THE VISITORS WHO MARVEL AT THE OKAVANGO BLUE DIAMOND ON DISPLAY AT THE AMERICAN MUSEUM OF NATURAL HISTORY IN NEW YORK WILL SEE A HISTORY LESSON IN GEOLOGY AND PLATE TECTONICS IN ITS 20.46 CARATS. BUT SCIENTISTS DO. The oval brilliant-cut fancy diamond, which has a clarity grade of VVS1, meaning it has very, very few slight inclusions, or imperfections, was discovered by the Okavango Diamond Company in 2018 at the sprawling

Orapa mine in Botswana. It is only about the size of a plump almond.

But to George Harlow, a geologist and curator of the museum’s Halls of Gems and Minerals, it is a thrilling road map through millions of years of history.

“This diamond has an extraordinary story,” he said in a phone interview on Nov. 10, the opening day of the exhibition. “For most of history, we didn’t know why diamonds were blue. They were thought to be low in nitrogen. But, in fact, they contain borons, and as soon as the boron is more abundant than nitrogen, the diamond becomes blue.”

For those of us who have not thought about atomic element No. 5 since high school chemistry class, let’s just say that

the mineral can exist deep below the earth’s surface before it razzle-dazzles us in the form of blue diamonds.

While most diamonds are formed about 100 to 150 miles below the earth’s surface, the Okavango Blue probably was formed more than 400 miles below in what is called the transition zone, Harlow said. And the diamond’s boron comes from seawater, which, over millions of years, has been swished around inside the earth by a process called subduction, in which oceanic tectonic plates slid underneath continental plates. That pushed flecks of boron deeper into the transition zone to begin their long journey to diamond-hood.

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said. “The interpretation now is that the seafloor founders much deeper into the earth’s interior than we previously thought.”

The Okavango Blue — on public display for the first time — will remain at the museum, along with more than 1,000 other rough-cut diamonds from Botswana, for about five more months (the exhibition’s closing date is not yet determined, the museum said). The diamond is on loan from the Okavango company, which is wholly owned by the government of Botswana. Both page 80

share their name with the country’s vast inland Okavango Delta, known for its wildlife and unspoiled beauty.

Harlow noted that the public had a centuries-old fascination with blue diamonds, particularly the 45.52-carat Hope Diamond, which had been traced to 17th century India and now is at the Smithsonian National Museum of Natural History in Washington.

“I think the history of the Hope Diamond has driven the interest because a lot of people don’t realize that

diamonds give out spectral colors,” Harlow said. “When people see the Okavango Blue, they’ll be surprised that they see more than just blue.”

And he hopes that those gawking at the gem’s rainbowlike spectrum might also see what he sees.

“Diamonds are a time capsule because they are old, often two billion years or more,” Harlow said. “They also teach us a lot about our planet.”

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TABOO FOR TOO LONG

EVENT PROMOTER HUGLINE JEROME

RAPE. IN THE UNITED STATES ALONE, IT IS ESTIMATED THAT ONE IN SIX WOMEN HAS BEEN A VICTIM OF RAPE, WHILE ONE IN 33 MEN HAS BEEN RAPED IN HIS LIFETIME.

R APE & ASSAU LT V IC T IM S SP E A K O UT, N AME AC C U SE RS O N T H E V IRA L V IDE O TH AT H AS E V E RYO N E TA L KIN G However, rape is vastly underreported, many times due to societal constrains, fear of victim blaming or the sheer shame associated with the violent act.

The topic has been, for too long, taboo in polite social circles, and its off-limits status has, in turn, made society complicit in both allowing it to happen, as well as covering it up. And while the #metoo movement has fueled support

EVENT PLANNER MATTI DOMINGUE page 84

for victims of violent sexual assault rather than the ageold victim blaming (“She was asking for it”), it remains a sensitive, difficult conversation to have no matter the situation or platform.

Rape, sexual abuse and assault continues to do untold damage to victims at every level of society and in every corner of the earth. The idea that somewhere is safe and insulated is a false narrative,

SINGER/DANCER BEATRICE KEBREAU

many times perpetrated by assailants themselves.

Nowhere is this more true than in Port-au-Prince, Haiti, which is where our story takes us this month.

On January 19, 2022, five Haitian women took to the airwaves of Instagram to discuss the topic on the No Filter Channel (@nofilterchannel) profile. Moderated

by Hugline Jerome, Caëlle Jean-Baptiste and Fabiola

CHEF CYNTHIA VERNA

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“Before we started planning the show a week ago, I thought I was alone (in my rape)."

- BEATRICE KEBREAU PROFESSIONAL SINGER Coupet, the guests shared a most intimate, painful secret: all of them had been sexually assaulted, molested or raped in their lifetimes. This lineup of all Haitian women – who are entrepreneurs, personalities and known figures within the Haitian society – shocked viewers, many of whom had never heard rape discussed so openly. For others it recalled a story from 2014, when Cynthia Verna, a chef from Haiti living in Miami, published her memoir, “Calvaires: Viols… et autres souffrances,” which described the sexual assaults and rapes she endured in her adolescence, one of which resulted in the birth of her first-born son. Verna was one of the panelists who joined No Filter Channel to discuss the topic in detail.

For the others, Beatrice Kebreau, Matti Domingue and Coupet, it was the first time they’d spoken openly about the subject. "What I want everyone to take away from this emission is that is there life after an experience like this," said Coupet.

At one point, Jerome’s telephone was simply overwhelmed – streaming the Instagram Live while also receiving hundreds RADIO HOST FABIOLA COUPET of messages – and abruptly died, cutting the live feed.

When she restored it, more than 300 viewers reconnected to watch and listen.

After the Instagram Live ended, Polo Lifestyles connected with Jerome, Kebreau and Verna. The three of them

had been overwhelmed by the reception and were planning the next emission, Let’s Talk About Rape Part 2, scheduled for the following Wednesday evening.

“Before we started planning the show a week ago, I thought I was alone (in my rape),” recounted Kebreau, whose story on Wednesday night detailed a horrific rape by a family member, molestation by a close family friend and her attempted suicide. For years, Kebreau was unable to speak about the assaults and rapes, and as a result, was continually subjected to the presence of both her rapist and molester. On top of that, at school, bullying destroyed her self-confidence, and she longed for peace that she imagined death might bring. At 14, she jumped from the balcony of her family home, but only broke her leg in the process.

In her 20s, she began to work with one psychologist, then another, and finally a psychiatrist to helped her understand that part of her healing could come from helping others. Today, Kebreau uses dance and song therapies as avenues for her healing – and to help others with their own healing, too.

Verna, who became a household name in 2015 within Haitian social circles following the publishing of her book, found the reception this time around to be warmer. “I was put through the wringer seven years ago,” she shared.

Because one of her rapists was a woman, “I was called bisexual, a lesbian; my name was just destroyed,” Verna said.

She created a foundation to help other survivors: Rebirth After Sexual Abuse, or RASA. It was through her charitable work that she started meeting other victims, both in Haiti and aboard. “It’s worth the fight, and when you get an opportunity (to heal), you take it,” she concluded.

The following Wednesday, January 26, Jerome reprised the discussion on rape with two new guests: Dr.

Roseline Benjamin, a psychologist, and Ambassador Claude-Alix Bertrand, the latter of whom surprised Jerome when he named the rapist, Evans Lescouflair, of his adolescence during the livestream.

The details of his assaults over two years’ time were too much for Jerome, who broke down and walked away from the recording. More than double the number from the previous week watched the show live. The recording, posted to her profile, had thousands of views, reposts and shares.

Bertrand’s inbox was flooded immediately, with messages from friends, acquaintances and perfect strangers, some of whom shared their own experiences of assaults and rapes. Bertrand wanted viewers to understand why he spoke publicly about his rape on Wednesday’s show. “There’s a perception that boys and men can’t be raped, because of the physical reaction to intimate touch, but all non-consensual sexual relationships are rape, moreover heinous when the aggressor is an adult and the victim is a child,” he said before detailing what he called two years of hell. Bertrand was only 11 years old when his private school teacher savagely took advantage of his innocence under the guise of oneon-one private tutoring and coaching.

He recounted how, though he had been an honor student, his grades suffered and his interest in school declined. “My lesson all these years later - and what I will tell any parent - is this: notice small changes in your child... those changes are indicative of a bigger problem. As the adults in the room, its our job to figure that part out when our children can't describe what's wrong.”

In the years since his tenure at Bertrand’s school, Lescouflair served as Minister of Sport and Youth for the

BY J O S H JA KO B I T Z E D I TO R - I N - C H I E F

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“There’s a perception that boys and men can’t be raped, because of the physical reaction to intimate touch, but all non-consensual sexual relationships are rape, moreover heinous when the aggressor is an adult and the victim is a child."

- Ambassador UNESCO Itinerant Pour Haiti Claude-Alix Bertrand

The No Filter Channel Instagram Live with hosts Hugline Jerome and Caelle Jean-Baptiste and guests Ambassador Claude-Alix Bertrand and Beatrice Kebreau has launched a viral reaction on the subjects of sexual abuse, assault and rape

Government of Haiti, which has now fueled discussions about his sinister and carefully executed career that kept him close to children for decades. In 2010, a case was brought against him, but didn’t result in any legal action in the confusion following the devastating earthquake that struck Haiti that same year. This time around, it seems that retaliatory mobs may take justice into their own hands in the absence of a clear path to prosecute crimes like these in the Caribbean nation.

Jerome had planned for Part 2 to be the conclusion of her series on rape, but following the emission she indicated it could be a longer running series. “One of the things we’ve noted is the need for our generation of parents to be more in page 86

touch with their child’s emotions and unspoken behaviors. No matter how close you think you are with your child, this is a nearly impossible subject for them to bring up. When we see a change in our child, as the parents, it’s our responsibility to find out what’s going on,” she said.

Kebreau and Verna echoed that sentiment, encouraging parents not to use euphemisms when referring to intimate body parts. “It can be uncomfortable, sure,” said Verna. “But if it helps your child avoid a devastating incident, it will be worth a few moments of discomfort.

Giving a child license to name body parts scientifically is very empowering.”

Verna knows about difficult conversations with her children. Prior to the

publication of her 2015 memoir, she sat down with her son to tell him he was the result of her teenage rape. “He was incredibly kind in his response,” she said.

Later, she noted, he told her it was really “fucked up” that her rapist had gotten away with his crime for all these years.

Honesty is truly the best policy when it comes to your children – let them see you vulnerable and transparent, she concluded.

If you or someone you know has been sexually assaulted or raped, please contact the authorities or reach out to an organization that can help you, such as the National Sexual Assault Hotline in the United States, 1-800-656-4673.

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HOT SHOTS

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ARE PEPTIDE INJECTIONS T HE NEW FOUNTAIN OF YOUTH?

I

BECAME A FITNESS PERSON DURING THE COVID-19 PANDEMIC. WHILE THE WORLD WAS IN CHAOS AROUND ME, I EXERCISED TO STAY SANE. AFTER A YEAR AND CHANGE, THOUGH, I WAS READY TO LEVEL UP.

That’s how I found myself sitting in front of Jamie Gabel, co-founder of Advitam in New York City, a metabolic wellness clinic where Gabel uses treatments like hormone replacement therapy, IV treatments, and more to improve not only how your body looks but how it functions. As we begin to treat wellness as both an internal and external pursuit, experts like Gabel are at the forefront.

After a conversation about my fitness goals (two words: Chris Hemsworth) and lots of blood tests, he recommended hormone replacement therapy to address my lowish testosterone, as well as something else: peptides. I had to dig into my dormant high school biology knowledge to understand. I knew peptides were chains of amino acids, but they’re also signaling molecules that can stimulate the cells in our bodies to perform specific, targeted functions.

It’s a complex idea that sounds simple.

“Over time, if your cells are not working efficiently, they can cause problems,” says William Seeds, co-founder and chairman of the Seeds Scientific Research & Performance Institute and the world’s leading expert on peptide therapy. Those problems can be anything from signs of aging in our skin to musculoskeletal injury to more serious degenerative diseases. Loss of cell function is a part of the natural aging process, but the job of cellular medicine, particularly peptide therapy, is to help

BY GARRETT MUNCE

those cells regain their efficiency. The reason peptides work so well is that our bodies recognize them. “Your body already knows exactly what this signaling peptide is trying to do. We’re just using them to right the ship,” Seeds says.

In my case, Gabel prescribed a combination of growth hormone–releasing peptides (GHRPs) that I injected into my abdomen on a specific schedule for a period of two months. These peptides sent signals to my brain to produce more growth hormone, which helps build muscle and burn fat. In the old days someone might have given me straight-up growth hormone to inject, but that would have come with serious risks. “It’s easy to overshoot with actual growth hormones,” Gabel says. “If this happens, the risks can outweigh the benefits. Many clinicians now feel that growth hormone peptides are a safer alternative.” One of the benefits of peptides is that your cells “are already preprogrammed with genetic information,” like an automatic shutoff valve, so it’s less likely that your body will produce too much of the hormone.

" S E E I N G M Y M US CLE S SWE LL WAS F UN , B U T I ALS O N OT I CE D T HAT I C O ULD T R AI N HAR DE R AN D R E COVE R FAST E R WI T H LE S S S O R E N E S S , T HAT M Y E NE R GY WAS HI G HE R , AN D T HAT I WAS S L E E PI N G BE T T E R ."

GHRPs like the ones I used aren’t always for aesthetics; they have longevity benefits, too. “Your brain function requires

growth hormone. So does your skin.

Really, every cell in the body has a receptor for it,” Gabel says. I experienced that firsthand. Seeing my muscles swell was fun, but I also noticed that I could train harder and recover faster with less soreness, that my energy was higher, and that I was sleeping better. That, I realized, is the beauty of peptides.

In traditional medicine, we identify a problem and take a drug to fix it, but by targeting the source, peptides can have a wide range of effects that work together to help your body perform better. And when it performs better, it looks better, too.

There are about 150 peptides currently available or being studied for all sorts of things, including repairing muscles and tendons, preventing fibrosis, supporting the immune system, regulating the gut, and stimulating collagen production. “That’s just the tip of the iceberg,” Seeds says. He sees a future where peptides could become the standard for the prevention of heart disease, neurodegenerative diseases like Alzheimer’s, and even cancer. Right now peptides are being studied in combination with chemotherapy to help make it more tolerable and less toxic. It’s all still fairly new, but it promises such enormous benefits that, according to Seeds, big pharmaceutical companies are starting to pay attention. “There’s a reason it’s growing,” he says. “Because it’s working.”

One day we may all be injecting or swallowing peptides to treat or prevent every possible ailment. They have helped me achieve a fitter body than I had a year ago, but the reason I’m going to keep using them is more than that. For the first time in a long time, I have actual pep in my step. page 91

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L AU R E N SANC HE Z (& JEF F B EZOS)

THE WORLD'S MOST

POWERFUL

A

GIRLFRIEND?

NYONE WHO CHANCED UPON JEFF BEZOS’ SELFIES ABOARD A LUXURY YACHT IN ST-BARTHS EARLIER THIS MONTH WOULD HAVE BEEN FORGIVEN FOR DOING A DOUBLE TAKE. In mirrored heart-shaped shades and a silk shirt so tight it might have been tattooed on to the 57-year-old’s torso, the Amazon boss looked more like US rapper Pitbull than the one-time monobrowed tech nerd who achieved global domination in a pair of high-waisted beige chinos.

But it was the stunning brunette wrapped around him on the 88-foot vessel, Tender To – which cost a meager £31,000 a week to charter – who completed the new look. In a backless, cutaway metallic 1970s jumpsuit that left little to the imagination, Lauren Sanchez discoed her way into 2022.

As well she might. After all, if Forbes were to publish a ‘Most Powerful Girlfriends’ issue, this 52-yearold media personality would be at the top of the list.

Beneath Bezos’ New Year selfie – the caption celebrating ‘personal growth, renewal, rebirth’ – his girlfriend of three

years (according to official timelines at least) commented: ‘I love you baby. For every reason and no reason.’

Although when Bezos (now 58) and Sanchez first came out as a couple at Wimbledon in July 2019, cynics speculated that there might be 114 billion reasons why the striking journalist might have fallen for the tech mogul and owner of space tourism outfit Blue Origin – and a spate of predictable headlines ensued.

It had only been six months since Bezos and ex-wife MacKenzie Scott had announced the end of their marriage in a heartfelt tweet assuring people, ‘If we had known we would separate after 25 years, we would do it all again.’

MacKenzie Scott – now the third richest woman in the US – has since married their children’s science teacher, Dan Jewett; and anyone zooming in on paparazzi pictures of Sanchez on that yacht will have noticed that her left hand was weighed down by a huge yellow heartshaped ring, fueling rumors that 2022 is the year Bezos and Sanchez will make their union official.

Born to second-generation Mexican American parents – Eleanor and Ray Sanchez – in Albuquerque, Sanchez has been a familiar TV face in the US for

decades.

‘When I first became a reporter,’ she later said in a 2018 interview with British entertainment reporter Mark Wright, ‘I did it because there was no one else [out there] that looked like me.’

Ever since that giant bauble appeared on Sanchez’s finger, however, the questions have moved on, from ‘will they, or won’t they?’ to what kind of influence Mrs Bezos II might have on her husband – beyond that 360-degree transformation from dweeb-suited executive to buff and swarthy playboy.

It was after meeting Sanchez that Bezos set up the Bezos Earth Fund where she is listed as vice chair.

Since then, he has committed to hand out over $10 billion to help fight climate change and protect nature through a variety of global programs set out by the initiative, which has also started to focus more on how pollution and environmental degradation disproportionately harm low-income neighborhoods and other vulnerable groups.

Bezos certainly has a vested personal interest in that now; even if, from what one can tell, Sanchez seems to have encouraged the one-time workaholic to be more spontaneous and eke as much joy out of daily life as he can. page 95

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Strike up a

ROMANCE IN PARIS

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R E S TAUR ANT GU Y SAVOY

THE SEXIEST RESTAURANT IN PARIS

G

UY SAVOY, THE RENOWNED FRENCH CHEF, IS OLD-FASHIONED IN THE VERY BEST SENSE OF THE WORD. HE WAS BORN IN NEVERS IN 1953, WHICH MAKES HIM RATHER OLD FOR A CHEF, A PROFESSION IN WHICH YOUTH TENDS TO DOMINATE. HE HAS OPENED RESTAURANTS IN SINGAPORE (NOW CLOSED) AND LAS VEGAS (STILL THRIVING) AND THREE YEARS AGO HE MOVED HIS EPONYMOUS PARIS ESTABLISHMENT INTO A FINE LOCATION AT THE MONNAIE DE PARIS ON THE QUAI DE CONTI, OVERLOOKING THE RIVER SEINE.

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The location is in keeping with Savoy’s style of luxurious cooking. There are doormen at the entrance and one guides clients up the red carpet to the restaurant. At 8:15 p.m. on a Friday, Savoy looks immaculate. Grey hair, grey beard, gray trousers and a white chef ’s jacket without, unusually, his name embroidered on it. He smiles at us as we pass by.

The couple we are meeting are old friends, originally from Korea, but now living in Hong Kong. When we last ate together, in the dim sum restaurant at the Four Seasons Hotel in Hong Kong, I described them as “the table from hell” as they can be tricky to please.

At Guy Savoy, neither the wine, nor the food, nor the service gives them any grounds for complaint. Once seated, we are handed the menus and a wine list

that comes in such a thick book that a table is provided for easy reading.

The menu, admittedly much slimmer, gives me pause for thought. It starts in French, before moving on to English with a French translation. Then come pages in Chinese, Japanese and Russian, as evidence that Savoy’s culinary reputation has traveled far and wide.

And then there are the prices. With these, Savoy makes no attempt to hide either his ambition or his status. The first starter — iced poached oysters with a granite of seaweed — costs €105. The two vegetarian first courses will add three digits each in US dollar-equivalent to your bill. One, described as multicolored vegetables in a seasonal vegetable ragout, is €90. It looks very splendid, a panoply of the produce of a sunny summer topped with a splayed-out courgette flower.

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As is typical of very high-end restaurants, there is little difference between the prices of the first and main courses.

The most expensive dishes are, in fact, a first course of boned skate wing topped with caviar, and a main course of roast lobster with a bouillabaisse sauce, both at €150 each.

There are plenty of extras, of which perhaps the best arrives first. Described as a club sandwich, it consists of two small squares of brown bread holding together three pieces of creamy foie gras served on a skewer — an impressive opener.

Our first courses are also most impres-

sive. The boned skate wing with caviar looks so generous it could be called caviar with skate; the raw tuna, while slightly underwhelming, is extremely fresh. We all choose fish for our main courses, with two ordering the red mullet. They are served two fish each, with an intricate cube of courgette and spinach and a sauce of red mullet liver.

My John Dory is perhaps the most spectacular. Alongside the two fillets comes a transparent bag of clams cooked in the oven, opened and then placed on the samphire with the fish. It also has a sauce, a reduction from the fish and shellfish, which fortunately the waiter

leaves on the table because otherwise I would have to chase him into the kitchen for more. I drain the lot with my spoon.

Variations on a millefeuille and apricots comprise our desserts. Both are excellent, but these are really just a prelude to a cart of supplementary desserts, a huge variety of ice creams and sorbets, as well as a cherry clafoutis. Nobody leaves here hungry. We drink a bottle of Dauvissat 2008 La Forest Premier Cru Chablis (€175) and a bottle of 2009 Nuits-SaintGeorges Clos de la Maréchale (€240).

Our bill comes to €1,555.

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G E T T I N G AROU ND PARIS

EMILY IN PARIS' GUIDE TO CHIC PARISIAN HOTSPOTS R EGARDLESS OF HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT NETFLIX’ EMILY IN PARIS, WE’RE HERE FOR THE CLOTHES THAT WON’T STOP AND LOCATIONS THAT REMIND US OF SUMMERS SPENT IDLY IN THE SOUTH OF FRANCE AND EVENINGS AT CHIC PARISIAN HOTSPOTS. THE ENTIRE SERIES HAS BEEN FILMED IN PARIS, WHICH MEANS THE BACKDROPS OF THE SCENES ARE TRULY STUNNING.

Season two of the show, which dropped on Netflix on Dec. 22, features even more beautiful filming locations than

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season one. The production also moved to the South of France this season, giving us amazing views of the beaches.

Riverboats run up and down the river frequently, so you can have your own charming party on the water.

Many of the locations used in season two of Emily in Paris are easy to spot because of the city’s iconic architecture, but some locations weren’t exactly what they seemed. Production used a variety of spots in the City of Light, and with the help of cast and crew, and even Netflix, we’ve tracked down some of the filming spots you can actually go to right now. Now, on your next trip to Paris, you can truly channel Emily and have a très bien time!

VILLEFRANCHE-SUR-MER

BATEAUX MOUCHES

GRAND-HOTEL DU CAP-FERRAT

Production took to the Seine to film the party scene on a Bateaux Mouches.

The stunning hotel Emily, Mindy, and Camille stay at in Saint-Tropez is the Grand-Hotel du Cap-Ferrat in Saint-

Emily’s jaunt to Saint-Tropez for a luxurious weekend wasn’t exactly in Saint-Tropez, but it was nearby in Villefranche-sur-Mer and Saint-JeanCap-Ferrat. Both beautiful locations were used as the backdrop of SaintTropez. There were a few spots in SaintTropez that can be seen in this episode, but much of the filming was done in these small towns.

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Jean-Cap-Ferrat. The lavish hotel is a Four Seasons property.

PALOMA BEACH The scenes at Laurent G’s in SaintTropez were filmed at a beautiful beach club called Paloma Beach in Saint-Jean-Cap-Ferrat.

SENEQUIER One of the few true Saint-Tropez backdrops is this restaurant, Senequier.

VERSAILLES The show truly did film this lavish episode at Versailles. Gregory Dupree’s (Jeremy O. Harris) opulent show couldn’t possibly have taken place anywhere else. The palace is a short train ride away from Paris. page 103

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LE MARCHÉ D’ALIGRE When Emily and Gabriel are shopping for food for her dinner party, they’re at Le Marché D’aligre, a bustling market in the 12th arrondissement.

LE CAFÉ MARLY Emily, Camille, and Sylvie enjoy a breezy lunch outside the Louvre with the museum’s iconic pyramids in the background. They’re seated at Le Café Marly.

LA SAMARITAINE Emily and her new (temporary) friend Petra (Daria Panchenko) had fun gallivanting around La Samaritaine before Petra starts to steal things. The shopping center is massive and has everything you — and Emily — could want. Filming also returned here for the Laboratoire Lavaux event later in the season.

LE CHAMPO CINEMA When Luc (Bruno Gouery) invites Emily to a movie, they go to Le Champo Cinema, which can be seen in the exterior shot. You can find this popular arthouse theater in the Latin Quarter. page 104

TORTUGA GALERIES LAFAYETTE PARIS HAUSSMANN When Emily finally gets Camille to hear her out on the whole Gabriel thing, they meet at Tortuga Galeries Lafayette Paris Haussmann with a view of Palais Garnier in the background.

PONT DES ARTS One of the spots Mindy sings with Benoit is on the Pont des Arts, a pedes-

trian bridge over the Seine.

FONTAINE SAINT-MICHEL Mindy and her new band perform one afternoon at the Fontaine SaintMichel, which can be found in the sixth arrondissement.

LE RAIDD The night that Emily and Julian (Samuel Arnold) go to a gay bar to find Gregory

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Dupree, they end up at Le Raidd.

The club is known for its shower shows.

ÉMILE ANTHOINE STADIUM Gabriel and Alfie’s kick-around is at Émile Anthoine Stadium, with a beautiful view of the Eiffel Tower in the background.

LE CHÂTEAU DE SONNAY Le Château de Sonnay again plays the backdrop for Camille›s parents› home. The beautiful building is a few hours outside Paris and dates back hundreds of years.

ROXIE Mindy’s stint as Dame Pipi is at a real-life supper club called Roxie. You can find it in the eighth arrondissement.

CHÂTEAU DITER Though Emily, Camille, and Mindy go to an epic party at the Ragazzi House, the party was filmed at Château Diter, which is on the French Riviera.

HAMMAM LES CENT CIELS As a birthday surprise, Camille takes Emily to a hammam, or spa. It was filmed at Hammam Les Cent Ciels, just outside Paris.

PERROTIN PARIS Camille’s gallery scenes were filmed in the real-life gallery Perrotin Paris.

BREAKFAST IN AMERICA 2 Emily jokes with Alfie that he’s found the most non-French restaurant ever, and that spot is Breakfast in America 2.

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PLACE DES VOSGES

LA SOCIÉTÉ

SHANGRI-LA PARIS

Once Mindy and Benoit admit they have feelings for each other, sparks fly at Place des Vosges in Le Marais.

Sylvie certainly makes an entrance at La Société when she meets up with Erik.

You can find this chic cafe in the sixth arrondissement.

Mindy and her band’s “big gig” is at a supper club, which she’s not thrilled about. And though the exterior shots of the location imply that it’s at Huatian Chinagora, the scenes were filmed at Shangri-La Paris, a luxury hotel.

THE BOMBARDIER Emily was startled to find that her traveler drink from The Bombardier was actually just beer. It would figure that Alfie would take her to this British pub in the Latin Quarter.

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HÔTEL PLAZA ATHÉNÉE Sylvie meets with her husband, Laurent, at the Hôtel Plaza Athénée, a stunning Dorchester hotel.

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N A IL T H E R OM ANTIC MOOD IN PARI S

THE BELLE ETOILE SUITE AT LE MEURICE

A

LMOST ALL HIGHEND HOTELS BOAST ABOUT THEIR IMPRESSIVE SUITES, BUT ONLY A SELECT FEW OF THESE ROOMS GET THE ACCOLADE OF BEING CALLED THE MOST EXTRAVAGANT OF THE BUNCH. page 108

Luxury suites aren’t a new phenomenon, but the caliber of this top room category debuting at upscale properties worldwide in recent years is another level altogether, according to Jack Ezon, the founder of the luxury travel company Embark Beyond. “The latest suites aren’t necessarily the biggest, but they feature incredible design and one-ofa-kind collectibles, from furniture to

art,” he says. “Every little detail has been thought out.”

The Belle Etoile Suite at the Le Meurice in Paris is a prime example (from $28,300 a night). The seventh-floor penthouse accommodation features a 360-degree view of the city that includes 18 landmarks—the Eiffel Tower, Palais Garnier, and Place

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Vendôme are all on the list. It’s hard to top the terrace here, which is immaculately landscaped to mirror the Tuileries Garden in front of the property and spans 3,000 square feet.

Belle Etoile’s design is a collaboration between Charles Jouffre, Margaux Lally, and Luc Berger and plays up elements such as bronze and gold shades, lightly

aged oak, and formal furniture in various materials like silk. The long dining table seats 10, and the cinema-style sitting room is meant for entertaining family and friends. Then there’s the marble-clad bathroom—a retreat unto itself—where guests can see the Sacré Coeur in Montmartre while taking a soak in the oversized tub.

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Le Meurice’s general manager, Franka Holtmann, describes a stay in Belle Etoile like being in your own Parisian

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apartment. “You get views of iconic landmarks and are in opulent surroundings that are very private,” she says.

“There is a sense of home.”

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R E F U E L ON THE RU N IN PARIS

TO-DIE-FOR FOODTRUCK GASTRONOMY

D

INING OPTIONS ABOUND IN PARIS, BUT SOMETIMES YOU’RE JUST ON THE RUN BETWEEN MEETINGS, SHOWS, OPENINGS OR APPOINTMENTS AND ANOTHER ESPRESSO JUST ISN’T GOING TO SUFFICE.

Petrossian’s Rostoff St-Petersburg sandwich, rolled like a gourmet wrap, is a combination of Alverta caviar, mozzarella, ricotta, baby spinach and beautiful slivers of hazelnuts, making it the most chic snack in Paris.

18, boulevard de la Tour-Maubourg, 75007

A sandwich would be just the thing to tide you over. Fear not, Paris’ burgeoning (and increasingly chic) street-food scene is serving up delicacies between slices of baguette. Here are six sandwich options for you when you’re on the move in Paris.

Bambino’s Baguette Sandwich, stuffed with grilled chicken, aioli and a dipping sauce, accompanied by a glass of organic wine like Macon Cuvee 910 du Clos des Vignes du Maynes Bambino 15, rue Saint-Sebastian, 75011

Le Menshi Katsu from Mokoloco (the second location from the same owners of Mokonuts Bakery) is known for its fresh and gourmet recipes. Organic beef short ribs from Axuria, located in the Basque region, are paired perfectly with sweet bread and anchovy sauce.

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The Baguette Sandwich with Caviar from Café Prunier is a delicious nugget to savor right then and there or take back home or to the office. Crunchy and crispy bread envelopes balls of melting caviar.

15, place de la Madeleine, 75008

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The French dip sandwich from Brasserie Rosie drips with cheese, roast beef, pickles and a secret sauce. Perfection in every bite.

53, rue du Faubourg Saint-Antoine, 75001

Chef Alexandre Arnal revisits French classics at Chez Jeanne, particularly with his Bikini sandwich. Toasted baker’s bread is stuffed with truffled Manchego, large button mushrooms and candied porcini mushrooms. A must-have.

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DIANA RO

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ROSS

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ARCH 26TH IS THE ICONIC DIANA ROSS’ BIRTHDAY, AND BEFITTING OF HER STATUS AS AN INTERNATIONAL STAR, SHE RECEIVES LOTS OF CONGRATULATORY MESSAGES ON SOCIAL MEDIA. THOSE THAT STAND OUT THE MOST ARE FROM HER FIVE CHILDREN. Diana Ross and her children have amassed millions of followers on social media over the last several years. In truth, their individual accounts are some of the most beautiful and healthy spaces on social media. The support the siblings show each other and the love they have for their mom, as well as how they display it, is inspirational.

Diana Ross is undeniably a phenomenal woman. She built the house in which most of the women in entertainment currently live. She overcame the hurdles of racism and sexism and thrived in an industry that was still in its infancy. She triumphed over bad press, rumors and innuendos, building a rich career and an even bigger legacy.

Professionally, she is a legend. But Diana Ross is also a wonderful mom.

“Our mum is a mum before she is anything else,” daughter Tracee Ellis Ross has been quoted saying many times over. Rhonda Ross, the eldest daughter, noted that their mother encouraged her children to be their own person. “I credit my mother with that. She allowed for us to have our own and to know that our own was important.”

All five of her children always speak highly of her, never even sharing a side joke or a sarcastic remark about her as a parent. Moreover, they are all independently living fruitful and healthy lives.

Whether it’s in pictures and videos on social media or walking the red carpet together, this is a family that exudes love. It flows genuinely.

Diana Ross has been a strong presence in the careers of her children.

In video archives, she proudly invited Rhonda as a teenager to sing at one of her events. In other videos, she performs with or while holding her other sons and daughters. page 117

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The glamorous life of the stage did not and could not take away her love, care, attention, and pride in her children. Her children have shared on many occasions that while growing up, she never left them for more than a week. When she was touring nearby, she made sure to come home every night and be there in the morning to help them make their beds and make breakfast. “She always made an effort to be a mom first,” said daughter Chudney.

Now that her children are all adults, she still performs regularly with them and has even toured jointly with Rhonda. page 118

Evan Ross shared in an interview that watching his mother’s performance in Lady Sings the Blues is what inspired him to go into acting. He also sought his mother’s blessings and opinions in his duet I Do that he sings with his wife Ashlee Simpson.

Tracee shared that her mother visits regularly on the set of Black-ish.

“I have five beautiful children, a wonderful career, a wonderful life,” said Diana Ross back in 1996 during her Super Bowl performance rehearsals.

Tracee recently shared in a social media

post that her phone was running out of space and she was really feeling bad as she had to delete some voice messages from her mother. She shared she found it hard because she sends such sweet messages.

Looking back at her childhood and Diana Ross as a mother rather than a superstar, Tracee said, “She really gave us space and the courage to live the lives that we want to be living, and to have time to dream and conjure up the life that I wanted to be living. ” Gal Mux Special to Polo Lifestyles 2021

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Left: Surrounded by family; Above: a younger Diana Ross page 119

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DIANA ROSS page 121

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FASHION & STYLE

PARIS HAUTE COUTURE SHOWS PARIS MEN'S FASHION WEEK page 123

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SERENA WILLIAMS 13.9 MILLION FOLLOWERS page 124

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PA R I S H AU TE C O U TU RE

EMBODYING THE SPIRIT OF THE CHANEL WOMAN

STYLE

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VERY CHANEL COUTURE COLLECTION COMES WITH ITS OWN SPECTACLE. WHO CAN FORGET FALL 2015’S CASINO-THEMED SET COMPLETE WITH BACKGAMMON TABLES OR SPRING 2016’S GARDEN OF DELIGHTS? FOR SPRING 2022, VIRGINIE VIARD OFFERED HER VERSION OF A VIRAL MOMENT BY KICKSTARTING HER COLLECTION WITH A SPECIAL APPEARANCE FROM A FASHIONABLE ROYAL.

horse, Kuskus, much to the audience’s delight at the Grand Palais.

Charlotte Casiraghi, the Monégasque princess and granddaughter of Hollywood legend Grace Kelly, opened the show by riding down the runway on her steed, the eight-year-old Spanish bay

Though she only became an official Chanel ambassador back in 2020, Casiraghi has long been part of the house’s repertoire of stars. A fixture in the front row since her teens, Casiraghi even had Chanel design one of her wed-

In addition to working as a model, founding a film production company, Swoon, and writing for magazines, Casiraghi is an experienced horsewoman. A competitive showjumper for more than a decade, she has participated in the sport’s global champions tour and has been actively involved in equestrianism at home in Monaco. Dressed in her tweed little black jacket, riding boots, and jockey’s cap, Casiraghi looked ready for competition while embodying the spirit of the modern Chanel woman.

ding dresses for her 2019 marriage to Dimitri Rassam. The late designer Karl Lagerfeld was a personal friend of her family, particularly her mother, Princess Caroline of Hanover, who he regularly outfitted in haute couture for special events like Monaco’s annual Rose Ball.

This season Casiraghi helped hammer home the collection’s themes.

Viard collaborated with artist Xavier Veilhan and focused on couture’s versatility. “I like sport, and it’s funny to think that the Chanel tailleur is something you can wear for playing golf or riding a horse,” Veilhan shared with Vogue’s Hamish Bowles backstage. Thanks to the variety on Viard’s runway and Casiraghi’s athleticism, that winning idea came through, and the show began on a thrilling—and viral— high note. page 125

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STYLE

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STYLE

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PA R I S H AU TE C O U TU RE

W

CHRISTIAN DIOR'S PURITY OF VISION

ITH HER SPRING 2022 COUTURE COLLECTION, CHRISTIAN DIOR CREATIVE DIRECTOR MARIA GRAZIA CHIURI CONTINUES HER DISTILLATION OF THE ESSENCE OF ATELIER CRAFTSMANSHIP, BEGUN ANEW LAST SEASON.

With her purity of vision, thoughtful applications of timeless craft that synthesize categories of ornamentation and structure, and consideration for physical presence, Chiuri’s creative vision for couture is here expressed perhaps stronger than ever before.

Returning to and developing on a collaboration from last season, Chiuri once again commissioned for the show’s backdrop and staging wall-towall embroidered panels created by the Chanakya ateliers and the Chanakya School of Craft based in Mumbai, India.

Embroidery also formed the focal point of the collection, and this season the creative director pushed it further, embodying a mission to show that the timeless technique is more than a method of ornamentation and adornment of an otherwise finished piece, as it is often considered, and is a craft that can exemplify the creation and purpose at the heart of the atelier.

Thus, embroidery takes a primary position in the construction and visual identity of garments. Canvases of sheer fabric are painted with thread, creating constructions and patterns that play page 130

central roles in clothing’s function to dress the body. Embroidery glides along the surface of a piece and rises from it, occupying space. With exaggerated and variable thread lengths, tassels cascade down gossamer dresses.

There’s no lack of graceful solidity to the collection either, however, as Chiuri explores the elegant possibilities of fabric itself. Woven between looks characterized by glitter and embroidery are sculptural jackets and fluid dresses and skirts that exude the pure simplicity of a single brushstroke.

Chiuri also displays a mastery of other ways to transform a two-dimensional cut of fabric into a piece that lives through three-dimensional space, like plissé and reverse seams.

Light as a feather, the color palette is kept to an airy minimal, with white, ecru, silver, black, and gray that sometimes creeps ever so slightly towards a soft blue.

This timeless minimalism of color and clarity of form creates an unmistakable juxtaposition to the embroidered artwork it is positioned in front of, which joyfully combines the impactful colors of pop art, the organic reverence for mystery and the natural world of religious and tribal art, and the cubist deconstructions of late modernism. It’s hard to say whether this artwork draws out a universal, unifying, and uplifting character from the craft of the collection, or if its colorfully raw exuberance and outsider status stands in sharp contrast to the collection’s frigid and timeless impeccability.

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STYLE

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PA R I S H AU TE C O U TU RE

INSPIRING RUNWAY LOOKS FOR 2022

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PARIS MEN'S FASHION WEEK

THE BEST FROM DIOR - HERMES - KENZO

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MEN'S FASHION WEEK - PARIS

DIOR page 138

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STYLE

HERMES page 139

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STYLE

KENZO page 141

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CELEBRITY GOSSIP ALGORITHMS DECODED

BRETT CHODY Trends contributor @brettchody

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LIND ITEMS… WHAT EVEN ARE THEY? INCREDULOUS GOSSIP? FAN FICTION? OR ARE THEY COLD HARD FACTS ABOUT THE INS AND OUTS OF HOLLYWOOD AND ALL THE PEOPLE IN IT? The truth is, they’re a little bit of all those things — and it’s up to you to decide what your take is on them. page 144

Blind items are short excerpts of celebrity gossip that use clues rather than names when talking about the item’s subjects. For example, you may read, “This foreign-born, A-list singer…” and be talking about Justin Bieber. Or another may read, “This A-list reality star who’s married to a billionaire rapper…” and be talking about Kim Kardashian.

You get the gist.

Blind items have been around for almost two decades now thanks to websites like “Crazy Days and Nights” and BlindGossip.com. But for the most part of their existence, the blind-item community was mostly made up of pop-culture, fanatic web sleuths who knew where to find blind items and how to recode them. But thanks to the massively popular Instagram account

@DeuxMoi and a few TikTok creators, they’ve experienced a major facelift and democratization in the past year.

Deux Moi began back in 2013, but rose to prominence as Instagram’s sole blind item account at the beginning of the pandemic in 2020. The creator of it remains anonymous; however, everyone assumes it is either someone with major connections to the entertainment industry or a colloquial pop-culture fan who just got really lucky. Lucky because they receive hundreds — if not thousands — of tips a week from Hollywood insiders, studio executives, assistants, and regular old fans about a myriad of celebrities and celebrity scandals.

The account, which now boasts over 1.3 million followers, prefaces every-

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thing it posts with a disclaimer that not everything sent it is true, nor can it be verified. However, a large number blind items that have been posted have turned out to be true in some way, shape or form. When this happens, Deux Moi posts a story of the original blind item along with the headline of the story the item was talking about with the iconic three words, “BLIND ITEM REVEALED.” Not only is Deux Moi a hub for those obsessed with celebrity gossip, but also for celebrities themselves. The Instagram is followed by a few big names in the industry, such as pop star Dua Lipa and supermodel Gigi Hadid. TMZ’s official Instagram account is even a follower as well. This demonstrates that Deux Moi has cemented themselves as a

trusted source of celebrity information in modern day, even though it’s based completely in blind items.

Blind items have also gotten a face lift thanks to a few TikTok creators like Shannon McNamara of the Fluently Forward podcast. McNamara– who is in her late twenties– has been into blind items for years but decided to talk about them on TikTok because she felt like there weren’t any blind items being discussed on the platform. Soon enough, a video she made about a blind item blew up and she realized that a huge portion of Generation Z – the age of the majority of TikTok users– had no idea what blind items even were. She took it into her own hands to become the voice of blind items on the platform as well as start her own podcast about celebrity

blind items, which has become one of the most popular entertainment podcasts on both Apple and Spotify since its launch a few months back.

Thanks to Deux Moi and McNamara, blind items are back with a vengeance. If you’re a pop-culture fan, it’s in your best interest to follow both of them to perhaps be the first to know about the hot gossip that’s happening in your favorite celebrity’s life.

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{PRIVATE VIEWING}

OLIVIA MAE PENDERGAST page 149

VERNISSAGE

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A S E R I E S B Y R A P H A E L K . D A PA A H I N T R O D U C I N G T H E - N E X T- B I G A R T I S T S T O T H E W O R L D O F A R T C O L L E C T O R S A N D C U R AT O R S

VERNISSAGE

OLIVIA MAE PENDERGAST FREEDOM, BEAUTY AND PURITY INSPIRED

BY THE FANG PEOPLE OF CENTRAL AFRICA RAPHAEL DAPAAH Art Contributor @dapaahgallery

I

T IS NOT OFTEN ONE COMES ACROSS AN ARTIST WHOSE WORK IS UNDENIABLY CONTEMPORARY, PROGRESSIVE AND ORIGINAL, YET STILL FIRMLY UNDERPINNED AND INFORMED BY 20TH CENTURY ART MOVEMENTS OF REVOLUTIONARY OLD MASTERS SUCH AS PICASSO, MODIGLIANI AND GAUGUIN.

abstract art, inspired by the elegant sculptures and masks of the Fang people of Central Africa.

It would be remiss not to acknowledge the clear parallels between Olivia’s style of work and the old master, Modigliani, a fact she acknowledges as she discovered and fell in love with the artist’s work as a student years ago.

The iconic disproportion and elongated forms of her Kenyan muses, the vacancy of their expressionless eyes, and their easy, but stoic poses, pay homage to, and reference, his masterpieces. However, what makes Olivia’s portraits uniquely distinct and significant in style and in substance, is the

Olivia’s paintings, and indeed the artist herself, are reminiscent of a golden age where artists were daring, bold and inventive, in search of new perspectives, greater freedom, and a simplicity that is the purity and essence of life.

Gauguin escaped the rigidity of life in France, rejecting its social conventions for the liberty, peace, and inspiration he hoped to find in Tahiti, where he created his greatest works.

For both Picasso and more significantly Modigliani, freedom, beauty and purity was to be found in their encounter with page 151

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subject of her muses and her balancing of the scale.

Where both Modigliani and Picasso clearly referred to African aesthetic, style and motifs, often without credit or acknowledgment, to further their artistic movements, and western art at large; Olivia avoids their faux pas by virtue of being candid about her inspirations being an American artist, working and living amongst Kenyans.

Furthermore, each muse she captures beautifully on canvas has given their prior consent to pose for her, which is easily detected in the tranquil and easy nature of the subject, suggesting a level of trust, comfort and respect between both the painter and the subject. ‘Grace with Pink Cup’ and ‘Girl Sitting in White’ are perfect examples of this soft dynamic and interplay, when one observes their open and free body language and actions, in addition to the

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honorific halo that the artist has bestowed on them, an ancient symbol of reverence.

Empathy and a quest to truly see and appreciate people as they are is integral to Olivia’s practice and motivations. Her loose, almost transparent brush strokes, and soft, muted color palette, serve as an intentional visual device to see both beyond and through the obvious physical traits of her sitters in an attempt to capture their true essence and spirit, and connect on a deeper and more ethereal level. ‘Young Girl in Pink’ exemplifies this best, as the viewer is immediately drawn to the precocious and curious nature of a young girl teetering between the restraints of maturity and the exuberance of youth.

The question often asked, and hotly debated in art circles, is whether an artist not of African descent, can be considered a contemporary African

artist. The jury is still out on this case, however, most would agree that contemporary African art is about centering African art at the heart of global art, and not on the periphery, as has been the case historically. By this logic, any artist, African or otherwise, that centers African people, culture and narratives at the center of their practice, with sincerity, appreciation, and empathy, should be welcomed and embraced as such. Olivia is such an artist.

Olivia’s elegant pieces will be on show at the Emerge solo exhibition between January 29th to March 20th 2022 Out of Africa Gallery Carrer Nou 1 - 08870 Sitges, Barcelona - Spain www.outofafricagallery.com RAPHAEL DAPAAH ART CONTRIBUTOR POLO LIFESTYLES 2022

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MANSION OF THE MONTH

1201 TOWER GROVE DRIVE BEVERLY HILLS, CALIFORNIA

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MANSION OF THE MONTH

1201 TOWER GROVE DRIVE BEVERLY HILLS, CALIFORNIA

B

EHIND PRIVATE GATES ON JUST OVER 3 ACRES, THIS BEVERLY HILLS AMERICAN ENGLISH ESTATE BOASTS COVETABLE CITY SKYLINE, CANYON AND OCEAN VIEWS.

Interiors by renowned White House designer Michael Smith, whose romantic and comfortable aesthetic allows the home’s architecture to speak on its own.

The home was featured in Smith’s book “The Curated House,” as well as Architectural Digest. page 158

Enter the charming foyer with its architectural wood beamed ceiling and inviting comfort. Instantly, the gracious formal living room beckons, grounded by its original Georgian plaster fretwork ceiling, antique limestone fireplace, Venetian plaster walls and French doors overlooking expansive terraces and picturesque grounds. The captivating salon/office features green glazed millwork paneling, a lovely fireplace and “secret” bar. Retreat through the paneled billiards room, into the well-appointed gentleman’s library wing boasting a soaring coffered ceiling with hand stenciled design, bleached, waxed pine paneling, custom bookcases/cabinetry,

a stately marble fireplace and an office with private entrance (potential bedroom suite). The formal dining room enchants with a striking Zuber panoramic mural wallpaper and French doors that lead out to the terrace. The adjacent, light-filled, chef ’s kitchen flows into the airy, octagonal breakfast room with charming vaulted ceiling. Stairs ascend to the master landing suite with skylights running along the entire floor.

The sumptuous master suite, awash in light, features gleaming oak floors, dual large walk-in closets and a luxurious bathroom suite to pamper every indulgence with marble countertops, soaking tub, sauna and stand-up shower with

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CONTACT JOSEPH CILIC THE CILIC GROUP M. 310.925.1402 O. 310.454.0080

$49,950,000 BEDROOMS 7 | BATHROOMS 11 FULL AND 4 PARTIAL 16,439 SQUARE FEET

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spectacular and uniquely private views across the treetops to city and ocean.

Two additional bedroom suites compete the floor. The back stairs descend to the main level and into an intimate family room that leads to a secluded upstairs bedroom suite.

“rooms” feature specimen trees, framed views and unique charms—from sun drenched gardens, to woodsy courtyards and dells, to sweeping emerald lawns, to contemplative retreats and belvederes soothed by the sounds of water, to one of the City’s loveliest tennis courts.

Step outside and enter a world of your own: magnificent grounds, both lush and private. Designed by Christine London, the garden includes mature towering trees and perennials, expansive lawns for entertaining, a heated gazebo for alfresco dining and viewing dramatic sunsets, “secret garden” arches, gravel and limestone paths, courtyards, tranquil fountains and a majestic four-season planting array. The topography is dramatic and each of the many outdoor

A two-story guest house nestles among trees in the canyon and consists of two 1b/1ba guest suites. The stone and glass conservatory—crowned by a copper-trimmed lantern and surrounded by enchanting treetop views and courtyard garden—is both a tranquil sanctuary and intimate, soft-lit dining destination.

Soak in the sun at the swimming pool and spa flanked by the pool house and pool pavilion with graceful columns and outdoor fireplace. Walk down elegant

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stone steps to a championship, N/S, lighted tennis court with loggia, bar and bath.

The approx. 6,000 sf Tennis Court Building is the perfect space for a fully equipped home office or private secondary living space, with dedicated entrance and motor court. Currently it is an entertainer’s delight with an outfitted theater, entertainment lounge with bar, billiards room, sizeable office, recording studio and golf simulation room. Additional compound amenities include: ample parking, gym, manager’s office, wine cellar; all outbuildings/gazebo design by AD 100 architect Oscar Shamamian.

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MANSION OF THE MONTH

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ZORRO RANCH STANLEY, NEW MEXICO 87056 USA

PRICE $27,500,000 BEDROOMS 6 / BATHROOMS 7 FULL / 2 PARTIAL INTERIOR 33,339 SQ FT. / EXTERIOR 7,500 ACRES ZORRO RANCH The Zorro Ranch includes the grand three story, four-bedroom main house, nearby caretaker’s residence and multiple other residences throughout the property, including one separately and privately page 164

located residence and the four residences at Ranch Central, located near the ranch entry area, the Lodge and Log Cabin, both located in their own private area.

The ranch includes a grass air strip and hanger. Other amenities include the

stables, fire house and yurt.

Approximately 35 minutes from Santa Fe, providing inspiring views in all directions.

Listed by Neil Lyon and Matt Desmond

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CASTILLO CARIBE CARIBBEAN LUXURY IN THE CAYMAN ISLANDS PRICE UPON REQUEST

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OW YOU CAN HAVE IT ALL: LIFESTYLE, LUXURY, LOCATION AND LIMITED TAX LIABILITY. WITHOUT DOUBT CASTILLO CARIBE IS ONE OF THE FINEST BEACH-FRONT ESTATE HOMES IN THE WORLD OFFERING EVERY LUXURY FOR MODERN DAY LIFE WITH ALL THE LIFESTYLE OPTIONS ONE WOULD EXPECT FROM THE CAYMAN ISLANDS AND THE CARIBBEAN.

Although the Cayman Islands enjoy year-round sunshine and a temperate climate, this benefit is eclipsed in most people’s eyes by the Islands’ offshore status. The Cayman Islands are well known as a financial center on the world’s stage and provide the highest quality of lifestyle available in a tax

neutral environment, making it very appealing to people of high net worth to seek residency here - a position that is actively encouraged by the local government and, as a British Overseas Territory, is a very stable option.

There are a number of destinations in the world that are able to offer offshore status to a greater or lesser degree, but the Cayman Islands have no local taxes whatsoever: no property tax, no income tax, no capital gains tax and no inheritance tax. Castillo Caribe offers a rare opportunity to combine this with privacy, security, luxury and lifestyle all on a pristine white sandy beach overlooking the crystal-clear waters of the Caribbean Sea. The space afforded here is too limited to provide adequate description of all the properties features and amenities, please request a detailed package by emailing: heather.carrigan@sothebysrealty.com

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Bey ond Cue rvo & Cor ona

BA JA CALIFORNIA

BY CEZAR KUSIK

SOMMELIER & WINE WRITER page 170

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In Search Wines of Baja of Solace California BA JA CALIFORNIA

THE NEW NAPA

CEZAR KUSIK Wine Contributor @cezartastesearth

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EXICO HAS ONE

OF THE WORLD’S OLDEST AND CULTURALLY RICH HERITAGES. THE AZTECS AND THE MAYANS LIVED THERE AFTER ALL. THEIR HISTORIC LEGACY HAS BEEN PASSED ON THROUGH CENTURIES AND HAS REMAINED A BIG PART OF THE PRESENT. It is visible in the country’s traditions, page 172

everyday customs, art, food, and drink.

From Baja California to the Yucatan, Mexico offers an astonishing diversity of landscape, fauna, flora, and cultural sophistication.

When one thinks of Mexico and its tasty libations, it is the countless number of Tequila labels that first comes to mind or an ice-cold bottle of Corona beer with a wedge of lime nestled in the bottle’s neck with a few Tacos Al Pastor on the side for me, please. Rarely you would hear someone say, “I feel like a glass of Mexican Cabernet Sauvignon or Chardonnay.” Yet historically, Mexico is the oldest wine growing region in Americas. The vines were brought here from Europe in the 16th century by the Spanish conquistadors.

Not long after Hernan Cortes and his fellow conquistadors landed on the

shores of Mexico in February 1519, the Spaniards depleted their supplies of wine brought from the Old World and began planting vineyards locally. Over the next few centuries, the vineyard plantings became so prevalent in the new colony, that they threatened Spain’s wine export interests, and in 1699 King Charles II outlawed wine production all together (except for religious purposes, of course). Under the watchful eye of God himself, vineyards continued to be cultivated and wine was made at Catholic missions. Wine cultivation returned to normal after Mexico gained its independence from Spain in 1821.

The early 1900s brought the devastating effects of phylloxera and the Mexican Revolution and the wine business declined. The industry bounced back, however, in the 1930s and with renewed demand from the national market.

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It is ironic to talk about a 500-year-old wine region as up-and-coming. Since its commencement in the 1600s, Mexican wine was solely made for local consumption and was practically unknown outside the country. This has changed in the last few decades, roughly from the mid-1980s. The number of the wineries has been growing exponentially.

Many small, boutique operations with meticulous, environmentally conscientious farming practices have sprung up with a focus on quality rather than quantity and with meticulously applied advanced wine making techniques. In 2006, there were less than 25 wineries in Mexico. Now, there are more than 120 commercial wineries in Baja California alone. Mexico is an innovators’ paradise. Almost no traditional appellation regulations apply here. The wines’ varietal makeup and quality is left to the discretion and transparency of the wine maker. Blends found nowhere else in the world can be a common practice: Cabernet Sauvignon with Tempranillo and Syrah or Nebbiolo married to Tempranillo are good examples.

It is in Baja California where nearly all notable wines of Mexico are made with roughly 80 percent of the entire

country’s production, although that statistic fluctuates. It is Baja’s geographic positioning that makes it most adoptable to wine vine farming; it is furthest North with dry and warm Mediterranean-like climate. The region of Valle de Guadalupe stands out within the peninsula and has even been boldly branded the “Napa Valley” of Mexico by some optimistic enthusiasts.

Valle de Guadalupe is northernmost wine region on Baja and best known mainly because of its proximity to the US border. Traveling down south one passes through the valleys of Ojos Negros, La Grulla, Santo Tomás, and San Vicente with each area offering unique micro-climate and terroir. The elevations of vineyards differ dramatically, climbing as high as 3400 feet in Ojos Negros and descending below 600 feet with gentler, maritime climates near the Pacific Ocean. Valle de Guadalupe’s more continental geographic positioning comes with harsher weather conditions. The diversity of soil composition is reflected in the presence of granite, red clay rich in iron, magnesium, decomposed sandstone, and some white clay which all lend themselves to accommodating different grape varieties.

This diversity of growing conditions allows for a wide range of grapes. Over 30 different varieties are grown in Baja vineyards alone. The peninsula’s overall warm to hot temperatures contribute to wines that tend to be ripe and fruit forward. Reds are often inky in color, jammy, spicy, and bold, packed with dark fruit aromatics and high alcohol levels. The whites are perfumy with rich tropical fruit flavors. Even thin skin grape like Nebbiolo, which in its native foggy Piedmont (Italy)produces elegant, nuanced, earthy wines, in Baja results in a dense and voluptuously lush counterpart. (Talk about the effects of micro-climate and terroir!) There are some wine makers whose efforts to tame the effects of this warmth- abundant climate on wines are paying off. Examples of toneddown wines focused more on elegance and subtlety can be found sporadically and are a testament to the region’s additional potential.

These are the most planted wine grapes in Baja.

Reds - Cabernet Sauvignon, Merlot, Tempranillo, Grenache, Nebbiolo, Sangiovese, Mourvedre, Syrah, Malbec, Petit Verdot, Cabernet Franc, Carignan, Listan Negro, Zinfandel, and Montepulciano.

Whites - Sauvignon Blanc, Chardonnay, Chenin Blanc, Palomino, Viognier, Vermentino, and Colombard.

Cabernet Sauvignon is the most planted red, while Chenin Blanc is the leading white grape in terms of volume.

Typically, quality wine grapes (as opposed to table grapes) cannot be grown passed the 30th parallel (both North and South). It is simply too hot, too humid, and usually both. There are some factors which can bypass that rule. The Baja climate is arid (low humidity), and many vineyards are planted on high elevations offering cooler temperatures and diurnal shift for the vines. Nevertheless, irrigation is required. page 173

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Wines of Baja California The author enjoying a wine tasting

Of course, there are other regions outside Baja where wines are made in Mexico. There is Sonora in Mexico’s Northwest mainland across the Sea of Cortez from Baja. The Valle de Parras in the La Laguna region in the Sierra Madre Oriental mountains of central northern Mexico where one can find the oldest winery in the Americas, Casa Madera, founded in 1597. Zacatecas, Guantajuato, Querétaro in Central Mexico are also notable wine regions.

There is a growing correlation between Mexican wine and its bountiful and distinctive cuisine. Mexican chefs throughout the country and beyond have proved themselves worthy of the highest distinction, taking pride in representing the food of their origin. In the past very few Mexican restaurants, even in Mexico yet alone abroad, featured Mexican wines.

Nowadays, many new and established eateries offer well thought-out wine lists with a focus on wines made in Mexico.

In fact, a number of chefs are winery owners or are actively involved in winery operations.

All the innovations and modernizations within the industry have dramatically improved the quality of wines, which led to heightened recognition, and ultimately to increased interest of the wine consumer in Mexico and abroad. Mexican wines are now exported to nearly 40 countries. In five years, between 2012 and 2018 the average per capita wine consumption in Mexico doubled. Wine page 174

is also becoming a more frequent accompaniment in daily routines: meals, social gatherings, or a relaxing glass of wine after work.

With all this in mind one can only hope that in the years to come, Mexico will become more widely known for adding wine as yet another stellar, staple libation to this vibrant country’s drink portfolio.

A few Baja wineries worth of note.

ALXIMIA WINERY Run by Alvaro Alvarez, a mathematician turned wine maker, the winery is an architectural marvel. Its wine making motto is based on four principals: •

The earth that gives rise to the vineyards.

•

The water that is vital in the Valle de Guadalupe.

•

The fresh air that comes from the sea.

•

The fire in the form of the heat from the sun.

DECANTOS VINICOLA A modern winery founded about 8 years ago whose wine making philosophy, as the name indicates, is based on decantation and gravity to reduce the mechanical intervention. They produce three tiers of wine: Young Line, Reserve Line, and Premium Line in all three shades – white, rose, red.

They specialize in red varietals: Barbera, Tempranillo, Grenache, Cabernet Sauvignon, Barbera, Syrah, Zinfandel.

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VENA CAVA This winery self-advertises as “the hippest winery in Mexico”. With Phil Gregory as its wine maker, this property

is another architectural attraction – it is built entirely from recycled material.

Beyond the architecture, reds dominate here as well, but there is a Rose, a

white, and even a sparkling wine in their selection.

CESAR KUSIK WINE CONTRIBUTOR POLO LIFESTYLES 2022

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VOLUME VI / ISSUE II / FEBRUARY 2022

Wines of New Mexico AND YES, THE WINES OF

NEW MEXICO

As an amateur vinophile, I relish reading Cezar’s contributions in Polo Lifestyles. This month, his focus on Mexico pulled my heart strings as I gained a deep appreciation and love for Mexican wines when I was working in Mexico City and traveling to other parts of the country. Yes, I fell in love with tequila as well, but that's for another time.

His column also spurred my desire to share the similarities between the centuries of winemaking in Old Mexico with those of New Mexico, where, since moving to in 2016, I have developed a love for the budding industry and a few standouts that are praiseworthy.

The same dynamics that brought grape cultivation into Mexico brought it further north into Nuevo Mexico.

Sixteenth century Spanish missionaries sought a local source for sacramental wine as they settled into the Rio Grande Valley. With many ups and downs, by the late 19th century, New Mexico, now a U.S. territory after being annexed after Mexico’s loss in the Mexican-American War, had emerged as the fifth largest wine producing area in the country.

Then came disastrous floods and the page 176

folly of Prohibition. On the latter, despite the zeal of faith-inspired teetotalers, New Mexico remained farenough removed from the epicenters of American life that overall land dedicated to wine cultivation in New Mexico actually doubled during Prohibition.

But the mighty Rio Grande proved a more formidable protagonist and major floods, culminating in the largest in 1943, decimated the industry.

It took a half century, but the wine industry in New Mexico bounced back and is creating some incredible wines… and at a very reasonable price point.

Here are a few to add to your rotation.

Gruet – Perhaps most well-known beyond New Mexico is Gruet. Founded in 1984, Gruet’s heritage is pure French (the family has been making Champagne in France since the middle of the 20th century) and so is their method – champenoise – for developing one of the best U.S. sparkling wines outside California.

Two distinct vineyards in New Mexico’s arid south – and a third in central New Mexico added in 2014 and done in partnership with the Pueblo of Santa Ana –

yield a line-up of a half-dozen, non-vintage sparklings that deliver consistency, value and astonishment by those who’ve never tasted them before. My favorite is the Blanc de Blancs: gorgeous beading in the glass helps deliver essences of apple and honeysuckle and the Brut style avoids any cloying sweetness. Several years ago, while in New York City for the U.S. Open, a posh bar served Blanc de Blancs as their by-the-glass option, though I will own we ordered a bottle.

Maybe two.

Gruet’s Chardonnay is also noteworthy and done more in the California style.

Buttery and oaky come to mind and highly reminiscent of the Chardonnays out of Napa and Sonoma prior to the over-oaking sensation of the 1980s.

Gruet maintains tasting rooms in both Albuquerque and Santa Fe. I find the Albuquerque location garish in its architecture and off-the-freeway location; the Santa Fe tasting room is comfortably ensconced in the Hotel St. Francis with a lovely outdoor patio for warmer weather where I happened to have seen actor Emilio Estevez enjoying bubbly last summer.

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Lescombes Family Vineyards – Also nestled in the southern part of the state, the Lescombes family tends some 200 planted acres of similar sandy and arid soils as Gruet, and also creates a respectable sparking, as well as a much larger line up under a half dozen other brands. I will admit that I find some of those brands undrinkable, including one brand that marries New Mexico’s ubiquitous Hatch chiles with wine. No. Just no.

What they do incredibly well are reds and under their flagship label of D.H. Lescombes. The Mouverdre is unforgettable. Matured in French oak for two years before bottling, it is deep and inky, bursting with stone fruit and notes of white pepper. It’s a limited release each year so I tend to get a call as soon as it becomes available so I can score a case. The limited release wines from Lescombes show the care and attention that the label prides itself on, so stay with them and eschew the other more gimmicky, commercial brands.

Lescombes runs a series of bistros with locations in Almagordo, Albuquerque and Las Cruces with the latter just being named a “Top 100 U.S. Restaurants 2022” by Yelp. They also have tasting rooms in Deming and Santa Fe. The Santa Fe Tasting room serves up self-created flights for patrons and has one of the best charcuterie boards to be found. Each location serves an extensive variety of the family’s wines.

Finally, I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention a few of my favorite, smaller wineries in New Mexico. La Chiripada Winery, in the small rural village of Dixon, is always a stop for me when journeying north of Santa Fe. Billed as “New Mexico’s Oldest Winery,” it’s guaranteed to be a funky visit with a large variety of wines. I am partial to their reds including the Rio Embudo Red, a blend of obscure Leon Millot and DeChaunac

grapes grown in nearby Embudo Valley and Ruby Cabernet from the southern part of the state’s Mimbres Valley.

Vivac Winery, founded in 1998, is doing some extraordinary magic with traditional Italian grapes, including Nebiolo, Barbera, Montepulciano, Refosco and Aglianico. Their tasting room, also in

Dixon, is a great spot to sample the line-up and see how the northern New Mexico terroir, as well as the winemaking Padberg brother-duo behind Vivac, transforms the grapes into something unique and delicious.

BILL SMITH PHILANTHROPY CONTRIBUTOR POLO LIFESTYLES 2022 page 177

VOLUME VI / ISSUE II / FEBRUARY 2022

ALIGN WITH YO SPIRITUALITY · FAITH · QUESTIONS · GROWTH · FOCUS

THE YEAR OF LOVING YOU

“Remember that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one.”

— ELEANOR ROOSEVELT JYOTI PAINTEL Spiritual contributor @pololifestyles

J

UST TO PREFACE, THESE LAST TWO YEARS OF LIVING IN THE PANDEMIC HAVE NOT BEEN ABOUT TAKING RISKS, IN FACT, QUITE THE OPPOSITE: MANY OF US ARE SO RISK-AVERSE THAT WE STILL ONLY MAKE TRIPS OUT OF THE HOUSE FOR ESSENTIAL GOODS AND SERVICES. Travel is still greatly hindered and monitored and borders that were once free are tightly controlled to reduce the risk of transmission during a pandemic.

Most of us have now felt that letdown - the annual social gatherings with faraway friends and family: holidays, page 178

weddings, and other symbolic social gatherings that are missed out on and that can take a toll on our emotional well-being.

For most people though, the biggest jolt was felt when they found themselves facing loneliness when always being in the confines of their home. Working full-time jobs, raising and trying to educate children, taking care of household duties, and other simultaneous external demands were simply overwhelming.

Two years on and while the world is collectively working together to end the pandemic, many people are still working from home. Tasks that were once spread out into other arenas, or were given allotted time slots pre-pandemic have been all thrown together now and transitioning to permanently working from home has been a mixed-bag for a lot of people. Not surprisingly, working from home, or WFH, has increased feelings of isolation, boredom, and a sense of feeling trapped. According to a recent study published by the Journal

of Occupational Medicine in March of 2021: “For individuals who live alone, full time WFH without face-to-face interactions and social support everyday could contribute to mental issues such as social isolation and depression. For others, blurred work-life boundaries can make it difficult to detach mentally from work, which can increase stress and anxiety.”

If the isolation is hard for people who live alone then those who have families to raise face other challenges: “A common area of concern in worklife boundaries is balancing work schedules around other family members, where, for some parents, work time becomes “porous” as they might need to take care of house chores and run errands in between their work meetings. In some cases, parents might choose to sacrifice their sleep hours and work at nights or early mornings since these are the only quiet hours where they could concentrate on work and

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OUR PURPOSE IN SY N C W IT H YO UR V IB E

R E N E WA L · C O M M U N I T Y · S U P P O RT · E X P LO R AT I O N · E N E R G Y avoid frequent interruptions. Ongoing work-family conflict can lead to emotional exhaustion.”

PUTTING YOUR BEST INTERESTS AT HEART OF THE MATTER “Self-care is your fuel … Whatever the road ahead or the path you’ve taken, self-care is what keeps your motor running and your wheels turning.”

— Melissa Steginus

If you find yourself in a situation where you feel emotionally exhausted and trapped but quitting your job or simply removing yourself from the responsibility of a family and household isn’t possible, then you wouldn’t be alone, But unfortunately, you also won’t be able to go on much further without reaching the point of breakdown.

It may take courage to admit that something is wrong because then there is no going back and ironically the most predictable aspect of life is unexpected chaos: we all know the parable of the Titanic: dangerous icebergs are most dangerous lurking behind the fog in calm waters. Indeed. So in order to improve our lot we must move from the known to the unknown, Yet, another unexplainable truth of the law of attraction in this life is that ‘for everything we want, there is something we must give up’. In this case, we sacrifice security on some level for the possibility of limitless personal expansion.

If you see it as a process that yields

answers and revelations along the way, then you’ll be in the right place to start this: meaning you understand that eventually you’ll be asked to give up things that have defined you in the past to create a new you.

Here are five steps you can take that might change your life, but first, consider some preparation It’s important to not have technology around. Make time in one-hour increments to work on your process. If it goes on longer, that is fine, but know that there will be some emotionally heavy-hitting issues put on the table, so make sure you leave enough time to heal yourself with the valuable self- love and tenderness if you need it afterwards.

I know this sounds strange, but you have to ‘talk to yourself ’, and I mean out loud!

When we let what is running around in our mind out, some of it is meant to be taken seriously, and then some of it is meant to be seriously laughed at. In this process remember levity is your greatest ally, nothing is unfaceable. Hearing it out loud somehow does the trick of letting the thought either move forward or go to the recycling bin.

1.BE HONEST You may be unhappy in a number of areas of your life, but complaining about it does not bring about change. Take responsibility- identify right now what is making you miserable.

2. ACCEPT RISKS

with every step in the right direction your courage muscles get stronger.

Realize that risk leads to growth and it usually starts with fear, but rarely ends with it.

3. FOCUS PRIORITIES Value your needs. Remember to place value on your own well-being in every sense , not just physical, but starting with that first! Do not assume you have time later to address ‘you’ because you might not.

4. RENEW Having an “evolving” attitude inspires authority to renew yourself and make whatever changes will lead you to that renewal. Do you need to have more time to exercise, meditate, socialize, and / or be alone? Discover whatever it is that will make you feel good and make time to do it often and unapologetically.

5. FACE YOUR FEARS If you are afraid of a certain event such as a marriage crisis, or burnout from a job, or even a medical emergency, do not wait for said crisis to occur before having an awakening about the quality and value of your life. Good pilots anticipate and train for in-flight scenarios of disaster and malfunction and they are familiar with alternate methods to calmly and safely bring the plane down in an emergency.

You’re the pilot of your life and you can save it when something goes wrong!

The riskiest step is always the first. But page 179

VOLUME VI / ISSUE II / FEBRUARY 2022

MOLD YOUR MIND C OM MU N I CAT I O N

FORGE CONNECTIONS

WITH LASTING IMPACT JOEY VELEZ @joeyavelez88 Healthy Lifestyles Contributor

F

EBRUARY IS A MONTH WHEN WE HAVE A DAY DEDICATED TO EXPRESSING OUR LOVE FOR ANOTHER INDIVIDUAL. WHETHER THAT BE A BELOVED PARTNER OR A LONGTIME CRUSH, LOVE IS EXPRESSED THROUGH VARIOUS MEANS: GIFTS, FLOWERS, AND EXTRAVAGANT MEALS, TO NAME JUST A FEW. While these options provide joy and happiness, buying gifts and going out to nice dinners every night might burn a hole in your wallet. Forging strong connections with those around you does not have to come from material items, you can accomplish the same goal through something you do every day: communication. In particular, how you respond to good news and how you give feedback can not only make the relationship stronger, but can help bolster the benefits of positive emotion in those you communicate with. page 182

ACTIVE CONSTRUCTIVE RESPONDING AND EFFECTIVE PRAISE When someone shares good news with you, the way you respond will have an impact on the relationship. There are four ways in which we respond to good news: passive constructive, passive destructive, active destructive, and active constructive.

However, only one of these four ways strengthens relationships. Passive constructive would be considered a conversation killer. This is when someone shares good news but then there is no follow up and the conversation ends there, possibly due to disinterest.

Passive destructive is when you hijack the conversation, changing the topic and completely ignoring what the individual just shared.

Active destructive is when you focus on the negative aspects of someone’s good news. For example, if someone came to you and shared that they bought a new house and your response was, “Are you crazy? In this market? Sounds nuts!”

Finally, and the response style that builds strong relationships, is active constructive. This is when you further the conversation by showing authentic interest in their story. You build positive emotion in that person by having them elaborate on their experience.

There are at least two scenarios to keep in mind when deciding to engage in active constructive engagement. First, does the news involve some danger or some level of concern? If the news is considered dangerous, then you should not respond in an active constructive manner.

In this scenario, you should focus more on understanding and addressing the aspects of danger than on the good news.

For example, your friend has had a little too much to drink, but wants to show you how fast their new car goes. If there is some level of concern on your end, but the news is not considered dangerous, then make this a two-part conversation.

The first conversation would be playing the active constructive role, building that positive emotion, but maybe the next day you bring up your potential concern.

For example, that same individual wants to show you his new car, but you notice that their spending habits have changed substantially in the recent months, which just so happened to be around the time they went through a major life change. In the moment, spread the joy and excitement of the new car, but a follow up conversation to check in on that person may be warranted.

Second, you may not care about the news itself. However, this is still an opportunity to build up the individual sharing the news. If we respond like we do not care, then that individual

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is less likely to share good news with you in the future, therefore hurting the relationship.

Another form of communication that can impact the relationship is how you provide feedback. It is a natural tendency for human beings to bring attention to the negatives, or the areas that need improvement. We frequently provide such feedback with detail on what was potentially done incorrectly, but also

tend to include how to fix it.

However, what happens when that person does something well? The feedback we give turns from a more detailed response to “Good job. Keep it up.” With this type of feedback, it is more difficult to build-off of what was done well This is where effective praise comes in.

Effective praise identifies what worked and builds momentum by teaching the individual how they brought about

those positive outcomes so they can replicate those outcomes in the future.

This process demonstrates that you were attentive during their sharing. It demonstrates your authenticity, and it helps create winning streaks for that individual. The more wins we come across, the better.

EMOTIONAL TOLL Living on the East Coast has made communicating with my family on the West page 183

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You may not care about the news itself. However, this is still an opportunity to build up the individual sharing the news. If we respond like we do not care, then that individual is less likely to share good news with you in the future, therefore hurting the relationship.

Coast more challenging., particularly during phone calls with my mother. One reason why this is a challenge is because she is a prime example of a “joy thief.”

When I share good news, the conversation quickly changes to her good news.

As a result, and to no fault of her own, I have been impacted in two ways: I either do not share good news with her anymore or I become a “conversation killer.”

I do not share good news because I do not want to experience frustration when she changes the subject to focus on herself.

On the flip side, when she shares good news, I do not bother asking follow up questions because, quite frankly, she does not reciprocate. You can imagine how short our conversations are when this is my mindset. Due to this, our connection has weakened. This is not fair to my mother because she has done so much for me in my life – especially since I moved to the East Coast – that we should be doing more to strengthen our connection. Mom, if you’re reading this, please call and we’ll give it another shot. Yet, in order for this to happen, we both have to do a better job at responding to each other more actively and constructively.

During my first internship of graduate school, my fellow classmates and I worked a week-long youth soccer camp.

Our role was to provide an hour-long workshop to improve their mental focus before they got into more sport-specific drills. Once the workshop was complete, we would receive feedback from our supervisor for about 15 minutes.

For the areas I did well, it was a quick “good job” and then move on to where I needed to improve, which he spend a lot more time on. He noticed that my body language changed as he covered the improvement areas. He asked how I page 184

felt about the feedback and I was honest with my response. His feedback led me to believe that I was not doing anything well.

In my mind, my supervisor was not doing anything to build my confidence.

For what I did well, he would simply state “good job;” whereas he would give me a laundry list of things that I needed to do differently where improvement was needed. Based on this conversation, he decided to change the way he gave feedback. He gave me effective praise for the things I did well and why he felt that way, but kept his same process on the improvements areas which was also necessary. Not only did my body language change during feedback, but I went into my next workshop with more confidence than the time before.

FORGING STRONGER CONNECTIONS In order to respond more actively and constructively – and in a way that benefits the receiver – one strategy is to ask follow up questions. Don’t worry - there is no right number of questions you should ask, but the process itself allows the individual to continue talking about their good news. The key is to demonstrate genuine interest in the news they are sharing. If you notice that you are starting to lose interest or it is becoming harder to ask follow-up questions, find a way to end the conversation on a positive note. Another strategy is using the phrases, “That is wonderful!” or “That is amazing!” followed by a question.

This pairing demonstrates excitement and curiosity of what the individual experienced.

In order to provide effective praise, name the process that went into the individual being successful. When explaining what somebody did not do well, we take the approach of “That

was not good because...” so we can use the same approach for explaining what somebody did well. For example, “That was good because...” or “I liked this because...” adds that extra one or two sentences of detail, which increases the likelihood that this behavior will be replicated.

FINAL THOUGHTS For whatever reason, there is too often a natural tendency for human beings to focus on the negative aspects of ourselves and other people, to make judgments of others, and to out-do one another by talking about our own experiences.

However, in order to strengthen the bond between two people, you must bring attention to the positive aspects of both yourself and your other, and to actively listen to others instead of focusing on yourself. Not only can you strengthen your connection, but at the end of the day, you build that person up. It does not take much to make a person feel good. Be the change the world needs by responding more actively, constructively to somebody’s good news and help build momentum through effective praise.

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VOLUME VI / ISSUE II / FEBRUARY 2022

LIFE COACHING AND EXPERT

WELLNESS EXERCISES A GUIDE TO THE NEW

ALPHA MALE

JUSTIN JOHNSON Wellness contributor @goliathcoaches

V

ULNERABILITY MIGHT AS WELL BE AN EXPLETIVE FOR MEN. EVERYTHING IN US TELLS US THAT VULNERABILITY IS WEAKNESS. My father and I had our biggest fallout when I was 17. Weeks after that fallout, I remember seeing him cry for the first time. What did that do to me as a young adult? My father, being the premier Alpha male man in my life, made me think crying was an emotion that men didn’t use. “Stop crying. Why are you always crying? Look at the cry baby…”

However, crying is a human expression. Clearly, anything done in excess can be a problem, and crying is not an exception. What I had developed at page 186

that point in my life, was an excess of holding back my true emotions – and only expressing through anger. I’d get angry and lash out, fighting and being combative toward authority because I had no practiced tools for truly processing the honest emotions I felt.

My father did his best with the knowledge he had, so blaming him or my mother for how I acted takes no accountability. He was raised in a time when showing perceived weakness could literally mean your life. In his desire to protect me, he taught me how to hide emotion by the way he responded to emotion.

Today, I have two sons and I try to be as vulnerable as I can with them. I want them to see me happy, to see joy and positivity, I also want them to see me cry or even be embarrassed. How are they ever going to learn to process their full range of emotions if they don’t see the premier man in their lives processing?

Don’t hide emotions from your kids; more importantly don’t hide from

yourself. You are no less a man because you shed a tear. Emotions are not sexist; we all have them. They are tools that allow us to process situations that may be hard or almost impossible to process otherwise.

Why are we so attached to ideas like vulnerability being synonymous with weakness? Why are we so attached to these ideas of Alpha? In many communities, we latch on to the ideals that justify that we are equal to our counterpart. Why don’t we just feel equal? Why do we need something to justify being “man enough”?

Since it’s Black History Month, we’re going to look at how exactly this Alpha ideal has taken root in the black community… and why it can be very toxic.

Throughout history on nearly every continent – but, for the sake of this article, specifically in North America– the black community was property, without rights or representation. As nations abolished slavery, the United States, too, abolished the practice and ended the slave trade. Not fully recognized

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as citizens under various Black Codes, black men officially counted for just 1/3 of a man, their wages were capped, they were largely denied access to voting, education and decent housing. The various Black Codes were largely adopted into nationally recognized Jim Crow laws that widely existed until 1968.

And in 2022, we still are fighting for equality. It is not by happenstance that ideas reflective of strength and power are quickly adopted by the black community. Alpha status is not something that is only practiced by the black community, but I do believe it is something that can be very harmful if is continued in its current fashion.

My goal, during Black History Month is to redefine what it is to be a black Alpha male and restore the community and respect we need within our culture.

WHAT DOES ALPHA MALE MEAN? Alpha is a term that is used to represent a dominance hierarchy. The top of the hierarchy would be the Alpha, as in singular. We have perverted the term to mean the Alpha Group, which comes from David Mech in his studies of wolf packs in 1970, mainly in his book “The Wolf: The Ecology and Behavior of an Endangered Species.”

What he determined was that the Alpha wolf, or the leader of the pack, established and asserted his dominance by fighting the rest of the males in the pack.

That gave the Alpha wolf more privileges for breeding and plundering other spoils. Mech later recanted his term, Alpha wolf, and after more research, the Alpha wolf status was changed to the breeding wolf. He went on to admit

that the term was misused: the male that does the most breeding is now called breeding male; not the Alpha male. A wolfpack is usually just a family. As the males in the wolf pack grow older, they create their own packs. Alpha, in reference to wolves, is merely the parents.

Now, let’s get back to our human adaptation of Alpha male. Socially, anything that gives us a sense of power is attractive, especially to the disenfranchised.

We relish in these ideas, feeling more powerful and exuding a false sense of confidence. For a culture that has been treated less-than, it’s easy to draw a parallel between these ideas and the desire of equality.

I like to think back to a quote my father instilled in me growing up, “Fair is not a real word.” Every time I uttered something not being fair, he quoted this to page 187

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me. He was teaching me that nothing is fair, and in it not being fair, we must recognize our personal advantages and use those to be who we want to be.

Here lies the issue with the current philosophy of the Alpha male. It is rooted in dominance, in an archaic, animalistic fashion. Win by any means necessary: cheat, steal, step over people, value selfishness over selflessness. It spews chauvinism and praises victory with no regard to the sacrifice.

“If you’re not first, you’re last,” Ricky Bobby said in Talladega Nights, as he put everything he loved behind winning. It is a low-energy ideal, a survival mode expression. So what do we do? Do we scrap the idea of Alpha all together? I don’t think so; I think Alpha can be used to express a standard for men, especially black men.

The new black alpha male has characteristics that are important, supportive

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and high-energy expression. Survival is simply a low-energy basis and we must treat it as such, so that we can use our true gifts that come from our intuitive self. I’m currently writing a book that explores these characteristics in deep detail, but for this article I will name the Alpha 9: Protector, Provider, Vulnerability, Listener, Assertiveness, Respect, Service, Discipline and Moral.

These nine attributes, I believe, can do much healing for the black community, allowing us to create standards and morals we can use to mend the pain and heartache we have suffered for centuries.

the damn game.

Creating a set of standards creates goals, upholding these standards builds pride and being accountable can change one man, one family and ultimately the community.

Once we hold ourselves accountable to a standard, we do not break, we won’t need titles to validate our power. The alpha is innate, it’s who we are, now we need to ensure we execute it. The world is watching and waiting, lets step into the position we deserve. Let’s make the standards of the new black Alpha our new generational pass down.

It’s a brick-by-brick ideology, that allows for a strong foundation and builds up our cultural houses. How do we end the violence, help the poor? By getting in

The goal is power: power from the inside out, true power and true strength.

The tools we have, such as our emotions, give us the needed power for the situation. In order to restore the strength in our families and the community, in addition to all-around respect, we have to abide by a set of rules. The attributes I outlined earlier, I believe, are a great way to establish the strength, accountability and emotional intelligence we need to center ourselves in the light we should be viewed in.

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