The Portland Mercury, November 7, 2012 (Vol. 13, No. 25)

THE MERCURY:

FREE EVERY WEDNESDAY / VOL • 13 NO • 25 / NOVEMBER 7 - 13, 2012 / Familiarity: Breeding Contempt Since 2000

NEW DAY, NEW LOOK

(SAME OLD SHIT)

INSIDE!

, y r e b b Ro pted!

Interru

P. 11

HUA?) IN TH E ACT UA IH CH R EI TH D ( AN CATC HE S RO BB ER S DE NI S C. TH ER IAULT

NEWS

Election Night Hangover!

P.7

FILM

Skyfall: Not the Best Bond Ever!

P.37

LAFFS

Yay! Ian Karmel’s P.43 New Column!

foLLoW us onLInE At: fAcEBooK.com/mIKEthrAshErprEsEnts tWIttEr.com/mIKEthrAshErpdx · WWW.myspAcE.com/mIKEthrAshErprEsEnts

for A fuLL schEduLE vIsIt WWW.mIKEthrAshErprEsEnts.com

H A W T H O R N E T H E A T E R

& NEW YORk RiFLES

FRi

thIs

THuR

FRi NOv

21 ANd OvER SHOW!

8

7:00pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

LikE MOTHS TO FLAMES

thIs

AMiTY AFFLicTiON & gLASS cLOud

8:30pm doors 21 And ovEr In thE LounGE

SuN

thIs

FRi

FRi NOv

14

ALL THAT REMAiNS

thIs

MON MON NOv

TuES

12

6:00pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

HOSTAgE cALM

ALESTORM

iNSOMNiuM · SYSTEM dividE

& LiONizE

I FIGHT DRAGONS

TuE NOv

13

7:00pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

FRi NOv

16

SAT NOv

17

8:30pm doors 21 And ovEr In thE LounGE

Mc LARS · SkY FOx & ASTEROid M

8:30pm doors 21 And ovEr In thE LounGE

FRi NOv

16

6:30pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

The ROGER

21 ANd OvER SHOW!

MAcHiNE HEAd & THE BLAck dAHLiA MuRdER

WEd

thIs

& cREATuRE FEATuRE

24

SAT NOv

People Under The Stairs

6:30pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

on sALE

FRi

17

SAT NOv

10:00Am

7:00pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

503-224-tIXX

CLYNE DUO

WARBEAST

prEsEnts

20

TuE NOv

6:00pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

WOE, iS ME

cHuNk! NO cApTAiN cHuNk!

OuR LAST NigHT · SEcRETS cApTuRE THE cROWN & THE SEEkiNg

JOSEpH viNcENT

MikE MAiNS ANd THE BRANcHES & AMANdA JONES

24

SAT NOv

7:00pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

SuN dEc

ATTiLA vERAH FALLS

ABOvE THE BROkEN & i REckON

& HAARp

23

WEd JAN

iN THiS MOMENT

8 nW sIXtH avenue

& EvE TO AdAM

WEd NOv

21

7:00pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

GALLOWS

23

FRi NOv

7:00pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

TickETS gOiNg FAST!

28

WEd NOv

26

MON NOv

6:30pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

FRi

FRi NOv

& JONNY FRiTz cORNdAWg

SHAdOWS FALL

& vENdETTA REd

& AcARO

FEATuRiNg

kARL dENSON MON dEc

20

3

THu dEc

FRi dEc

SAT dEc

ANTIBALAS & STAY cALM

thE orIGInAL voIcE for

pErformInG ALL thE hIts from thE fIrst tWo ALBums “Iron mAIdEn” And “KILLErs” 21 ANd OvER SHOW!

FRi dEc

21

8

7:00pm doors 21 And ovEr

7

& LONERO

7:00pm doors 21 And ovEr

EvEryonE Who purchAsEs A tIcKEt BEforE dEcEmBEr 1st WILL rEcEIvE An InstAnt doWnLoAd of ‘LovE’ And ‘toxIc GArBAGE IsLAnd’ LIvE from thE studIo At WEBstEr hALL As WELL As A fuLL LIvE rEcordInG from thE BAnd’s currEnt EuropEAn tour

6

855-Cas-tIXX X2

1332 W BurnsIde st

SuN dEc

9

6:00pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

W O N d E R NEW B cuRSivE YEARS dAY A & giRL iN A cOMA & dAvEY SuicidE LikE BiRdS LL FRi i, THE MigHTY FRi HAiL THE SuN R NOv dEc & THE ORpHAN, O O THE pOET M

16

7

7:00pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

MON JAN

21

7:00pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

dEviN TOWNSENd pROJEcT

128 ne russeLL st

S T A R

877.4.FLY.tIX

DEATH GRIPS 1 SAT dEc

& THE ATLAS MOTH

855-Cas-tIXX X2

8:00pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

13 nW sIXtH ave

8:00pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

cOMiNg prEpArE for ImpAct · LIndsEy stIrLInG (soLd out!) · pIErcE thE vEIL (soLd out!) · thE dEEp dArK Woods · KEAnE SOON: ELuvEItIE · thE KILLErs · stu hAmm · uLI jon roth · pInBAcK · hot WAtEr musIc · sABAton · doro · nILE · soILWorK 2 Portland Mercury November 7, 2012

855-Cas-tIXX X2

Dance Gavin Dance A LOT

21 ANd OvER SHOW!

7:30pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

FRi

10:00Am

7:00pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

7:00pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

BROTHERS FROM ANOTHER & THE pHYSicS

& AMERicAN SHARkS

on sALE

SuN JAN

7:00pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

gYpSYHAWk

9

8:00pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

7:00pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

& HOOkERS

503-224-tIXX

thIs

2

HuNTRESS

7:00pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

c R Y S T A L B A L L R O O M

7:00pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

BARN BuRNER

9

6:30pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

7:00pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

thIs

1 5 0 7 s e 3 9 t H a v e n u e

cANcER BATS & LEgAcY OF diSORdER

11

9

6:30pm doors ALL AGEs BAr W/propEr Id

THu NOv

dEviLdRivER

R O S E L SuN A NOv N d ExHuMEd T ATTiTudE H AdJuSTMENT E & WEHRMAcHT A T WEd E NOv R

thIs

ALL AgES SHOW!

855-Cas-tIXX X2

go to

www.MIKEthrashErprEsEnts.coM for complete details and info on how to get your tickets early

News

Feature

Picks

Music

Arts

NOTES lovenotes@portlandmercury.com LETTERS MAY BE EDITED FOR SPACE

CIVIL RIGHTS: CHEAP AND EASY? RE: “Waiting for Marriage” [News, Nov 1], in which Basic Rights Oregon (BRO) discusses its decision against putting marriage rights up for a vote in Oregon in 2012.

Food

Film

TV

trying to win it in the 2012 election would have been expensive and not a sure thing. BRO is right. Winning your civil rights is supposed to be cheap and easy, just like it always has been. Successful civil rights movements have always sat on their hands and waited around for things to get easier. I say we wait as long as it takes! What a tragedy it would have been to try too soon! Because of course all worthwhile election victories are cheap and easily won.

posted by Michael Burdick

WRITING IN ABOUT WRITING IN RE: “Let’s Send Charlie a Message” [Hall Monitor, Nov 1], in which Denis C. Theriault suggests writing in a candidate for mayor to send ex-commissioner Charlie Hales a message.

Denis, I get what you are getting at— but none of these folks (other than the sadly unprepared Eileen Brady and, of course, Sam Adams) have subjected themselves to the sort of personal scrutiny that Jefferson has suffered in the last few months. Sure, he handled it poorly. But to suggest that a complete unknown (Chris O’Connor) would handle it better is ludicrous. If you write someone in, write in someone in who can stand the heat and knows the legwork involved—there are options.

posted by Rangerhunter

WRITE SHORTER THINGS! RE: “The Wait Is Over” [Last Supper, Nov 1], in which Chris Onstad reviews Szechuan Chef, comparing it to less-accomplished Chinese restaurants in town.

Way too much flourish on this review. Two paragraphs before we roll into the restaurant.

You guys need to fill a page? The restaurant is good. The menu is adventurous for the local kale/beet crowd. I’d like to say that a good review isn’t built on the mention of other restaurants in a negative way. A restaurant should stand on its own. A positively shit review, Merc.

Good job.

1624 N.W. Glisan St. • Portland • 503-223-4527 an evening with

WILLIAM TOPLEY

Threatening your employees with joblessness if they don’t vote for Romney is not at all like saying “Eat your spinach, it’s good for you.” It IS like saying, “Eat your poison or I’ll starve you to death.”

mOn

11/12

Posted by AlaskanNow

CAR MOOCHER ETIQUETTE RE: “Sorry Miss Daisy” [I, Anonymous, Nov 1], in which a ranter rants about cyclists who expect their car-owning friends to give them free rides.

years. It’s not a stupid decision, though it will seem that way to many who drive every day and can’t imagine any other way to live. There are lots of us who bike year-round, use TriMet, car-sharing programs, taxis, and offer gas money or otherwise return the favor when we do get a ride. So, it’s certainly not “synonymous with ‘be my taxi.’”

But I guess lazy generalizations are part and parcel of I, Anonymous.

Anyway, this is a real matter of etiquette.

Some of my friends wouldn’t want to be carless themselves, so they feel sorry for me biking or taking TriMet even though I really don’t mind it. So when they strenuously offer to pick me up, I usually say, “It’s fine, I’ll just meet you there.” When the weather’s really bad or a TriMet trip would be upward of 90 minutes, then it makes sense to carpool.

I’m perfectly willing to chip in for gas, but literally every time I’ve held out $10 and said, “please let me help pay for some gas,” they wave it away and insist it’s unnecessary. So eventually one stops trying to insist.

What I’ve found makes the relationship work is this: My friends do something nice for me, and I do something nice for them. Instead of trying to pay for gas for a short trip, I find it’s better to just pick up a tab for them at a bar, café, or food cart. Every so often, just say, “Let me get this,” and it more or less evens out. posted by Not Everyone Needs to Own a Car, America See? Not all cyclists are dirty, filthy animals who continuously suck off the teat of their car-owning friends! For your well-reasoned lesson on etiquette, Not Everyone Needs wins two tickets to the Laurelhurst Theater… and hey. Can someone give them a ride?

COVER ART:

Nikki McClure

nikkimcclure.com See McClure’s new show featuring pieces from her 2013 calendar at Land Gallery, 3925 N Mississippi, Fri Nov 9th, landpdx.com

SPINACH: THE NEW POISON RE: One Day at a Time (Nov 1), in which David A. Siegel, chief executive for Westgate Resorts, tried

115 SW Ash St., Suite 600 Portland, OR 97204 • 503-294-0840 • info@portlandmercury.com

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Wm. Steven Humphrey

INTERNS Lex Chase, Kathleen Marie-Barnett

MANAGING EDITOR Marjorie Skinner

DIRECTOR OF CIRCULATION Jay Williams

NEWS Denis C. Theriault, Sarah Mirk

SALES DIRECTOR Rob Thompson

SENIOR EDITOR Erik Henriksen MUSIC Ned Lannamann

SALES COORDINATOR Autumn Webring

ARTS/WEB EDITOR Alison Hallett FOOD Chris Onstad

DIGITAL SALES MANAGER James Deeley

COPY CHIEF Courtney Ferguson CALENDAR Bobby Roberts

ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES Sarah Elliott, Katie Peifer, Marissa Sullivan

PRODUCTION MANAGER Joe Davis

ALTPERKS OPERATIONS MANAGER Michelle David

SENIOR DESIGNER Nick Olmstead

OFFICE MANAGER Noah Dunham

AD DESIGNER Nami Bigos

GENERAL MANAGER Katie Lake

ART DIRECTOR Justin “Scrappers” Morrison

PUBLISHER Rob Crocker

Patrick Watson Half Moon Run

sat

11/17

JOhn Cale

tue

12/4

(Of the VelVet undergrOund)

Cass mcCOmBs

I’ve been carless by choice for nearly 10

posted by BokChoy

portlandmercury.com

Mission TheaTer

Fun

to scare his employees into voting for Mitt Romney, and then attempted to justify it by saying, “It would be no different from telling your children: ‘Eat your spinach. It’s good for you.’”

Winning your civil rights is supposed to be cheap and easy.

Yes, so glad we waited to ask for our rights. Because

Sex

CRYSTAL

THE

HOTEL & BALLROOM

CRYSTAL BALLROOM

80s VIDEO DANCE ATTACK

sat nov 10 $6 • 9 p.m. • 21 & over • lola’s room

FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 9 8 PM $5 21+OVER

WITH VJ KITTYROX

LOLA'S ROOM

mcmenamins and opbmusic present

Laura Gibson

McMenaMins and True WesT presenT...

RailRoad EaRth

Lost Lander saT-moN Dec 29-31 all ages

Fri Nov 23 all ages

Fri jaN 11 all ages

Floater the deVil makes three 11/11 Brandi Barlile 11/18 Ben giBBard 11/20 yOungBlOOd hawke 11/21 walk the mOOn 11/26 wOrld's finest/the BellBOys 12/2 d2r: the lumineers 12/3 d2r: passiOn pit 12/4 d2r: fun. 12/5 d2r: Of mOnsters & men 12/6 d2r: JOy fOrmidaBle 12/10 d2r: the shins 12/27 & 28 Beats antique 1/8 keane 1/20 slightly stOOpid 2/6 ellie gOulding 2/8 super diamOnd 2/27 fade tO light 4/25 lOCal natiVes

11/9

danceonair.com

AL’S DEn at CRYSTAL

HOTEL

FREE LIVE MUSIC nIghtLy · 7 PM 11/11-17

11/8-10

GaRCia Mishka biRThDay baND shubaly wiTh sPeCial GuesTs

ED FoRMAn Show - laTe-NiGhT Talk show Mix of CoMeDy, MusiC, aND iNTeRviews – ThuRsDays ThRu saTuRDays aT 10:30PM

Ballroom: 1332 W. Burnside · (503) 225-0047 · Hotel: 303 S.W. 12th Ave · (503) 972-2670 mcmenamins.com

CASCADE TICKETS

cascadetickets.com 1-855-CAS-TIXX Outlets: Crystal BallrOOm BOx OffiCe, Bagdad theater, edgefield, east 19th st. Café (eugene)

November 7, 2012 Portland Mercury 3

Creative services donated by Leopold Ketel & Partners.

4 Portland Mercury November 7, 2012

V i s i t O re g o n H u m a n e . o r g t o f i n d yo u r s .

Gossip

News

Feature

Picks

Music

Arts

ONE DAY

at a time THE WEEK IN REVIEW

by Ann Romano

Food

Fashion

Film

TV

Sex

Fun

route by dressing up as “a terrorist”—which to him means a Middle Eastern person with a turban and gun. People still recognized him as the worst person in the world, though. OH! And we almost forgot to mention that Cheers’ Kelsey Grammer disguised himself as “the most terrible dad of the year” by taking his three-month-old baby Faith to the Playboy Mansion for a loud, music-blaring Halloween party. According to TMZ, the baby was apparently being monitored by a “hot chick” who was drinking, while Kelsey whooped it up with partygoer Paris Hilton. The reason Kelsey brought his baby along? “We do not have a nanny or a trusted babysitter,” Grammer told TMZ. WOW. Maybe he can do a nanny-share with Octomom?

MONDAY, OCTOBER 29

THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 1

The Octomom saga continues—and in fact, it’s been so long You’ll all be relieved to know that Hulk Hogan has settled his since we first reported on Ms. O (real name Nadya Suleman), sex tape lawsuit with his ex-bestie “Bubba the Love Sponge.” let’s briefly recap: In 2009 she had eight babies (in vitro) even CAN THESE PEOPLE PLEASE JUST GET REAL NAMES??? though she already had six children Sorry… sorry. Anyway, as reported recently in One Day, Hulk while on public assistance, as well was suing Mr. Sponge for claiming that the former wrestler as allegedly having plastic surgery knew he was being recorded while having sex with Sponge’s to look more like Angelina Jolie. wife, and leaked the sex tape himself. While the settlement’s OHHHH, that Octomom! Well, that financial terms weren’t released, Monsieur Love Sponge was Octomom checked herself into reordered to make a public radio apology to Hulk, saying, “It is hab today after acknowledging she’s my belief that Hulk is not involved, and has not ever been inbecome dependent on the anti-anxvolved, in trying to release the video, or exploit it, or otherwise iety drug Xanax (a personal fave of gain from the video’s release in any way.” Hilariously, when the ours) because of stress. Her 14 kids apology was aired, TMZ reports that “the audio was sped up are currently under the care of three and hard to listen to… just like a legal notice at the end of a car nannies and two friends—who accommercial.” Touché, Bubba the Love Sponge, touché.

ASHTON’S BABY cording to TMZ couldn’t be happier with Octomom’s mini-vacation. One of the nannies confessed FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 2 that it’s “a MILLION times” easier to take care of the kids Arguably the creepiest man in the world—Joe Simpson, the without her around, and they are much calmer, and behaving agent/father of Jessica Simpson—is gay, a source tells the “like angels.” Errrrrr… except for perhaps Nadya’s 11-year- National Enquirer! (Okay! But before we get into that, a quick old son, who TMZ says was caught watching masturbation refresher on Joe’s parenting tactics: When Jessica was 12, porn—starring his MOTHER. (GAHHHHHH!!!) Guys! he reportedly held a virginity ceremony, giving her a Halloween isn’t supposed to be for another two days! “promise ring” and making her promise she’d wait “I’m not MEANWHILE… Gorgeous, formerly thought to be until marriage to have sex, vowing to her that he’d smart actress Mila Kunis was seen walking hand be the only man in her life until she was married. ‘troubled.’ in hand with cheating douchebag Ashton Kutch“I’m going to tell you how beautiful you are every I don’t get er yesterday, and according to the Daily Mail, she day,” Simpson reportedly told her. “And I’m going naked in was sporting a… BABY BUMP. (NOOOOOO!!!!) to be that person until the day you find a man to Seriously! Cut it out! These pre-Halloween scares public.” do that in my place.” When Simpson married Nick are gonna give us a Xanax dependency!

Lachey in 2002, Simpson proclaimed “What better gift to give her husband? Never touched by another TUESDAY, OCTOBER 30 man.” Shudder. Okay, back to the gay rumors!) “The source says An absolutely terrible day for our friends and readers on the the former youth pastor and Baptist minister has a twentyEast Coast as Hurricane Sandy made landfall in New Jersey, something boy toy,” Radar adds. “The stunning confession was killing 69 people in the Caribbean before its arrival, and then the real reason wife Tina filed for divorce from Joe, her hus113 more in the states. Winds clocked in at 80 MPH, the New band of 34 years, in late September.” NATURALLY… A “frusYork subway system was flooded, and more than 217,000 peo- trated” Joe Simpson “is telling friends and colleagues the stople were forced to apply for assistance from FEMA—which, ries that he’s switched teams are absurd,” TMZ claims—runBTW, presidential candidate Mitt Romney once said was ning their story underneath a paparazzi photo of a jaunty Joe one of the bloated government agencies that he’d cut. (Ugh. sporting bleached highlights, a canary-yellow sweater, black The worst.) Our thoughts and prayers are with all of you. And jeans, and yellow-and-black sneakers. We’re not saying being by “you” we mean everyone except Mitt Romney. MEAN- so matchy-matchy necessarily confirms Joe’s gay, per se… but it WHILE… In what was either the most terrible, wonderful, doesn’t really help his case, either. ALSO… Do you think Joe’s or boring news ever—depending if you’re a nerd, Hubby Kip, boy toy has a virginity promise ring? Just wondering! or ourselves… in that order—the Walt Disney Company has purchased Lucasfilm (home to all the Star Wars movies) for a SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 3 whopping $4.05 billion from its creator George Lucas. Why Amanda Bynes—the former child starlet who seems intent on is it “terrible”? Nerds everywhere simultaneously soiled their inheriting Lindsay Lohan’s tarnished “Gossip Queen” crown— Batman Underoos in fear that Disney would “Disney-fy” their wandered around a New York tanprecious Star Wars characters. Why “wonderful”? Hubby Kip ning salon wearing nothing but gogsoiled his already soiled jockey shorts in anticipation of a new gles, according to In Touch magazine.

Star Wars movie—set to debut in 2015—that would not be ru- According to a source, Bynes “seemed ined by the doddering hands of George Lucas. And why “bor- totally out of it” and “didn’t seem to ing”? Because nerdzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. care that everyone saw her naked.”

(It’s worth noting that this is merely WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 31 the latest problem for Bynes, who, Happy Halloween, everyone! And it’s become an annual Hal- as Us points out, “is currently facing loween tradition for us to report on what costumes the celebri- a DUI, two hit-and-run charges, ties were wearing… and mercilessly mock them. Buck-toothed as well as two separate charges for hillbilly popster Miley Cyrus dressed as annoying rapper Nicki driving with a suspended license.”

TROUBLED Minaj in a failed attempt to cancel out her own annoyingness. Thus far, Bynes’ attempts to solve her Kristen Stewart wore a face-disguising mask so she wouldn’t legal woes have amounted to sending a tweet to a certain govbe recognized as a tramp. And Chris Brown took the racist ernment figure: “Hey Barack Obama… I don’t drink. Please fire

HUMP! THIS WEEKEND! SQUEEEE!!

Hurray! Finally all of your horny dreams have been answered: HUMP! 2012 is showing this weekend! America’s favorite and funnest amateur dirty movie fest runs from Thursday, November 8, through Sunday, November 11, at Cinema 21 (616 NW 21st)—and if you need a ticket, then you better move fast! At press time every show except one was sold out—so hop over to portlandmercury.com/ hump NOW to score the hottest seats of the year!

Already got your tickets? AWESOME. Here are some helpful hints to make your HUMP! viewing more enjoyable!

1) Drink alcohol! (For obvious reasons.)

2)Do NOT take out your cell phones during the show! We want to protect our contestants’ anonymity, which is why we destroy all copies of the films after the final showing, and WE DON’T ALLOW ANY CELL PHONE USAGE. Okay? Okay.

3)Be nice! You’re going to witness all sorts of crazy sexy stuff— things you’ve never thought to watch on your favorite porn sites.

Since some of the actors and directors may be sitting in the same theater, be nice and supportive of other people’s kinks!

4)Don’t forget to vote! Who will win the $1,000 prizes for “Best Humor,” “Best Kink,” “Best Sex,” and the $5,000 grand prize for “Best in Show”? The winner will be decided by YOUR VOTE. 5)Have a hilariously good time! There’s no shame in being sexual, and its super fun to be sitting in a crowd of like-minded dirty birds, squealing, laughing, and marveling at the filthy shenanigans being projected onto the screen. Trust us, you’re gonna love it!

HUMP! 2012 Cinema 21, 616 NW 21st Thurs Nov 8Sun Nov 11

See portlandmercury.com/hump for times and tickets

DON’T MISS IT! the cop who arrested me. I also don’t hit and run. The end.”)

After seeing the In Touch story, she threatened legal action. (It is unknown if Barack Obama will serve as her counsel.) “I’m suing In Touch for printing a fake story. I’m not ‘troubled,’” she insisted to Us. “I don’t get naked in public. I’m 26, a multimillionaire, retired. Please respect my privacy.” MEANWHILE… Beach Bum Tanning CEO James Oliver, who not only has the greatest job title ever but also really is the CEO of Beach Bum Tanning, has Bynes’ back! “Employee testimony and security footage have confirmed that Ms. Bynes was not acting inappropriately,” he tells Us. “She is a long-time client and we stand by her account.”

Good enough for us! After all, if you can’t trust the CEO of Beach Bum Tanning, whom can you trust?

SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 4 Proving that there is exactly one sane celebrity in all of Hollyweird, Katy Perry is putting some distance between herself and her former BFF Rihanna. Why? Perry “reportedly thinks Rihanna is ‘making a huge mistake’ by romancing her violent ex” Chris Brown, reports hollywoodlife.com. Brown, who brutally beat Rihanna and threatened to kill her, is back in the good graces of the not-so-bright RiRi, and Katy “doesn’t want to be a part of it.” Good on you, Katy! Now quick, help us lure Rihanna into this van so we can lock her up for her own protection. MEANWHILE… Sex.com Editor Martin Ellison, who has the second-greatest job title ever, recently saw Miley Cyrus’ new dubstep video with DJ Borgore. And he’s sent Miley an offer: $1 million for a softcore “girl-on-girl” version of the video, in which Miley would make out with porn star Jessie Andrews. “We feel quite confident that we can secure the same venue, along with the same goats and little people,” Ellison’s letter reads. Dears, you know how sometimes reality itself seems to jump the shark? Yes. That.

THIS WEEK ON Portlandmercury.com FREE TIX TO THE HOTTEST SHOWS! Free

END HITS

MercPerk$

HALF-OFF TREATS AT SWEETNESS BAKERY! MERCPERKS.COM

Comment on this story at portlandmercury.com

Blogtown

POST-ELECTION RECAPS! BLOGTOWN

November 7, 2012 Portland Mercury 5

Photo stills from Access to the Danger Zone

DOCTORS WITHOUT BORDERS IN PORTLAND

NOVEMBER 14 –17 OHSU LECTURE

PANEL DISCUSSION WITH MERCY CORPS

FILM SCREENINGS

Emergencies of Scale: Delivering Humanitarian Aid in the World’s Largest Refugee Camp and a Sprawling Urban Slum

At Any Price? Negotiating Access to Crisis Zones

Access to the Danger Zone

Mercy Corps Action Center 28 SW First Ave, Portland

Hollywood Theatre 4122 NE Sandy Blvd, Portland

NOV. 14, 12:00 NOON

OHSU, MacKenzie Hall, Room 1162 3181 SW Sam Jackson Park Rd, Portland

NOV. 15, 7:00 PM

NOV. 14, 7:30 PM AND NOV. 17, 2:00 PM Narrated by Daniel Day-Lewis

All events are free, fully accessible and open to the public.

RSVP at doctorswithoutborders.org/portland

It’s Greek.

It’s Freak.

It’s Cheek to Cheek.

BACCHANAL BALLROOM HAPPY HOUR WITH AN EDGE featuring THE BAWDY BEAUTIFUL REVIEW & DJ ZIMMIE 5:30–8:30 P.M. tHurSDaYS in nOVeMBer at the PORTLAND ART MUSEUM sponsored by

6 Portland Mercury November 7, 2012

portlandartmuseum.org/bacchanal

Gossip

News

Feature

Picks

Music

Arts

Food

Fashion

Film

TV

Sex

Fun

Partied Out

Hall Monitor

Drama? What Drama? This Time, Election Results Came Early and Often by the Mercury Election Battalion

E

LECTION NIGHT is either an electric, nail-chomping phenomenon filled with cold sweat and jangly nerves—or, like this fall’s political denouement on Tuesday, November 6, it can feel a bit more like a ho-hum night in bed: about what you expected, over pretty quickly, and mostly pretty good.

By the Mercury’s press time, we knew that Charlie Hales had walloped Jefferson Smith— by a margin of 30-plus points in early returns— making good on a mayoral race promise that everyone called almost a month ago. We also knew pretty early, a development that qualified as a minor surprise, that incumbent City Commissioner Amanda Fritz had shaken off a historically tough challenge from State Representative Mary Nolan.

In another stunner, at least based on absentee results, every single local measure also was ahead. The Portland Public Schools bond and Multnomah County library taxing district were expected to pass—but the arts-education tax, flogged hard

by Mayor Sam Adams even as polls had it in trouble, was somehow joining them on that list.

Oh, and that Barack Obama fellow? Even Fox News was calling his reelection a sure thing around 8 pm our time. Forget Ohio. Try “oh, well,” instead.

But let’s be honest. That’s not why you’re reading this. You want to know about the parties. We won’t disappoint. We sent reporters out all across Portland in search of the odd, the inspiring, and the sad. Here’s what we found.

“Thank you all,” Mayor-elect Charlie Hales told well-wishers, beaming, after his big lead was announced. “The elections are finally over!

Now it’s time to get to the main job of running the city… my goal is to minimize drama and maximize results!”

Hales brought out a tool belt as a prop, and said he heard from Jefferson Smith, who said

kind things. Hales reciprocated, and even gave a shoutout to Eileen Brady.

Shortly off stage, Hales said he felt “great. A little dazzled, but great.”

And what about the national picture? “Is Obama still ahead?” Hales asks, his hands clasped in prayer. “Oh, I hope he gets it.”

“I’m Jefferson Smith, and until about 20 minutes ago I was running for mayor.” Smith’s concession speech, probably wisely, emphasized his appreciation for his volunteers and how he intended to stay involved (somehow) with Portland policy.

CHEYENNE SOPHIA RUTH

His party at the Melody Ballroom—with face-licking puppies, a bouncy castle, and a photo booth with silly props—until that moment, had a kind of school carnival air about it.

Afterward, Smith milled around. Asked what he would have done differently, he said, “I’ve known for a long time that we want the emphasis to be on the future of the city... but I would better address who I am, my strengths and weaknesses.”

Smith did shrug off any talk of fleeing Portland post-election (something he hinted at during a soul-baring interview on the cortandfatboy podcast). “Nah,” he said, “This is my hometown.”

At the Measure 80 pot party, in the stifling heat and smell of SE 82nd’s World Famous Cannabis Café, a cheer went up as Pennsylvania was called for Obama. Pot users and advocates

watched the returns on a TV decorated with a pot-themed American flag, and bartenders brought out chicken wings, cream cheese jalapeño poppers, and plates of Rice Krispies treats made with pot butter.

Despite the measure’s dismal polling, the crowd was upbeat and laidback. “Am I crazy for thinking it will pass?” said activist Anna Diaz. It wasn’t going to.

Mary Nolan conceded to Amanda Fritz less than hour after results first were posted. She told volunteers it was unlikely she’d be victorious—barring a miracle. Nolan’s finance director reassured the crowd by telling them what was important: “The bar is still here. The food is still here.”

The mood picked up considerably after CBS News called Obama’s victory.

Amanda Fritz, cautious as ever, struggled to get comfortable with the early results. So how will a second term differ from her first? For starters, Fritz says she wants a bureau with trucks.

(As in the fire bureau. Or water; DAN OLSON sorry, Randy Leonard!)

Fritz reportedly spent hundreds of thousands of her own cash to prop up her campaign.

She used up all of her remaining savings on this campaign. “We have a property tax payment due next month, and I’m not sure how we are going to pay it.”

The last voter in line at the Multnomah County Elections Office was a guy named Mark. He really wanted to vote against Charlie Hales, never mind Hales’ opponent—someone named “Christopher”? Told Hales already pretty much won, he said, “It doesn’t matter. Every vote counts.”

—Mercury writers Nathan Gilles, Bill Lascher, Sarah Mirk, Joe Streckert, Denis C. Theriault, and Alex Zielinski contributed to this report.

Trading Places

T

A Blowout and a Tight Race—Just Not the Ones We Expected by Denis C. Theriault

HE STORYLINES, at least for the Portland City Council races on the ballot, seemed set in stone after the May primary election.

Jefferson Smith threw down a compelling gauntlet in the mayoral race, riding an inexorable wave of enthusiasm—and a flawless turnout machine—to finish a narrow second behind Charlie Hales in the primaries. Hales was proving himself gaffe-prone and staid, and it seemed a matter of when, not if, Smith would eventually close the gap.

Meanwhile, incumbent Commissioner Amanda Fritz had drained her savings only to fall short in a desperate bid to escape a runoff with Mary Nolan. Fritz finished 1,500 votes ahead after leading big in early polls, but her foe, a better-connected state representative, now seemed ready to buy a big victory in November, dumping out campaign cash at a pace the self-funded Fritz seemingly couldn’t match.

That stone, however, was more like sand.

Smith’s breath of fresh air wound up befouled by his poor handling of a series of unflattering reports about his past—none more

devastating than his decision to visit the home of a woman he hit during a 1993 college party.

Donations dried up and endorsers bolted. By late October, a race already slipping away amid earlier news of Smith’s terrible driving record had crumbled into a double-digit polling deficit.

“The race was moving toward Hales prior to the assault issue,” pollster Tim Hibbitts said before votes were counted. But “the information about Smith showing up at the doorstep definitively ended it.”

And, then—while Smith’s spectacular flameout was sucking all the oxygen from Portland’s tight-knit political and media circles—Fritz took advantage by quietly shoring up her defenses and staying very much alive.

With a decisive (and intentional) assist from Mayor Sam Adams, observers say, Fritz positioned herself as a high-profile champion of mental health and public safety reform. She was the only other city commissioner besides Adams to make remarks when the city announced a settlement between the Portland Police Bureau and the US Department of Justice last month. That issue, significantly, helped flip one of the only two major media endorsements

Nolan had on her side: Willamette Week’s.

Nolan outspent and outraised Fritz, airing witheringly negative TV commercials to try to close the distance, but still trailed by a solid margin in polls emerging close to election day.

While Fritz only had to talk about herself, Nolan had to tell her own story while simultaneously tearing Fritz’s apart. It didn’t quite work.

“People forget their reputations as legislators aren’t super large,” coming from one district in one neighborhood, “as it relates to city hall and city votes,” says veteran lobbyist and political consultant Len Bergstein.

Tuesday’s winners will join Commissionerelect Steve Novick on a city council facing dramatic change without its longtime lightning rods, Adams and Commissioner Randy Leonard. Hales, a former commissioner, will preside over that shift—but not without some tarnish after his own series of campaign missteps, flipflops, and fibs.

“This is not a positive coronation for Charlie Hales,” Hibbitts says. “The other guy effectively disqualified himself. His team will have to think long and hard about how to gain the trust of a broader swath of the electorate.”

Comment on these stories at portlandmercury.com

by Denis C. Theriault Real Change for the Cops? Eh.

T

HANKS TO a tentative legal settlement announced last month by Mayor Sam Adams and the US Department of Justice (DOJ), real change is finally supposed to be coming to a Portland Police Bureau found guilty of using excessive force against citizens enduring mental illness.

The general terms go something like this: (slightly) more civilian oversight, (vaguely) tighter policies on the use of weapons like Tasers, and a (still uncertain) pledge of improved mental health care facilities.

But is that document, as currently constructed, actually going to deliver on those promises?

Probably not, according to the advocates and skeptics who showed up at city hall for a lengthy hearing last Thursday, November 1, and poked a series of large holes in a deal Adams had hailed as “watershed.”

And it might wind up even more watered down once labor negotiators get their hands on it.

Already, critics say there’s no court-appointed monitor who can boss the city around. Discipline decisions in deadly force cases still can’t be appealed and still aren’t open to the public.

Tasers, painful 50,000-volt stun guns, can still be used against passive resisters.

Worse, the feds have told the city attorney’s office that no one is allowed to discuss the details of negotiations.

Tom Steenson, a longtime civil rights attorney, said he spent hours giving the feds his thoughts on “best practices” but was dismayed to see so little of that work reflected in the current agreement.

An unspoken negotiating partner in police reforms: the police union.

“We were not involved in the negotiations,” he testified. “We don’t know whether the DOJ said those were bad ideas or whether the city said, ‘We’re just not going to do that.’”

Adams, at the end of the hearing, promised to make fixes—changes that would then need to be renegotiated with the feds. That’s a good step, if they’re substantive, and we expect to see some of those proposals this Thursday, November 8.

But there’s another negotiating partner no one’s really acknowledging: the Portland Police Association (PPA).

After the hearing, PPA counsel Anil Karia huddled privately with one of his city counterparts, Stephanie Harper. City leaders might think all those “the cops shall” phrases are ironclad. The union? Not so much.

Karia told Harper he wanted to work “constructively” but that he still needs breathing room when contract talks resume next year.

Already, he’s worried that one of the settlement’s centerpieces—stricter limits on the use of force and a new rule requiring cops to explain their decision-making—might not be “trainable.”

That’s a code word for the status quo: cops fired in fatal shootings always getting their jobs back. And if that’s what “real change” ends up looking like? No wonder everyone’s so freaked out about what we’ll get.

November 7, 2012 Portland Mercury 7

Low-Residency MFA in Visual Studies 8 Week Summer Sessions

Application Deadline: January 18, 2013

pnca.edu

Portland, Oregon merc_horiz0051_12_pdot.pdf

1

C

M

Y

CM

MY

CY

CMY

K

8 Portland Mercury November 7, 2012

3/8/12

4:42 PM

News News

Feature

Picks

Music

Arts

Food

Film

TV

Sex

Fun

Stinging Protest

Teens Pepper Sprayed at March Against Budget Cuts by Sarah Mirk

M

ORE THAN 500 protesters gathered in Portland’s Holladay Park three days before the election to make a sad statement: No matter who is elected, the country will likely see more cuts to education and social services. The mostly upbeat and festive march then took a surprisingly dark turn when police officers pepper sprayed roughly 20 protesters—including at least 10 high school students.

Organized primarily by advocacy groups including Occupy Portland, We Are Oregon, and Jobs with Justice, the protest on Saturday, November 3, brought out a diverse crowd for a march around the Lloyd Center mall protesting “government austerity.”

Since President Barack Obama took office, more than 600,000 state and local government jobs have been cut nationwide—a much steeper decline in public-sector jobs than in previous recessions. In Portland, perhaps the most visible cuts were some 110 teachers that Portland Public Schools had planned to axe last school year. Students helped save those jobs, marching on city hall in May and prompting Mayor Sam Adams to offer the district a $5 million “band-aid” from city coffers. Some of those same students turned out Saturday to protest continued budget shrinkage. But instead of being met with the mayor’s support, at least 10 wound up sprayed by police.

Grant High senior Dylan Tingley was among the group of students at Saturday’s protest holding the large wooden banner reading “Bring the ruckus! No more cuts to education!”

He was motivated to attend the event after being involved in the successful march on city hall this spring.

“We would have lost a lot of our staff,” says Tingley. “I was worried about losing advanced classes when they cut teachers.”

The student contingent was at the front of a crowd that pressed up against police lines.

For about a minute, the crowd inched forward, slowly walking the wooden banners into the line of bike police as a moving wall. Then, several officers began pepper spraying the crowd.

Police say they were worried that the large wooden banners could be used as weapons against officers—they confiscated at least three of the wooden signs at the march.

Interviews with six high school students

J

SHORT-TERM PROGRAMS,

LIFELONG CAREER A protester rests after being pepper sprayed Saturday.

HAIR • SKIN • NAILS

SARAH MIRK

“It was the most painful thing I've ever experienced.”

NOW ENROLLING

877.507.0930

—Grant High School Senior Halley Steiner at the front of the crowd reveal that none heard any warning about use of pepper spray.

Though it is not required by bureau policy, typically police will shout warnings before pepper spraying at protests.

“It was the most painful thing I've ever experienced,” says Halley Steiner, 17, also a Grant senior, who was still having trouble sleeping and eating a day after the protest. She and others laid on the sidewalk as volunteer medics poured water and Maalox over their faces.

After a few minutes, the rest of the protest marched onward, still surprisingly festive and with no other police altercations.

As part of the protest, Jobs with Justice also occupied the offices of the largest lobbyist of Portland City Hall, the Portland Business Alliance, on the afternoon of Friday, November 2.

“They represent corporate interests in our area,” said activist Laurie King. “We’re against the austerity that they’re shoving down our throats.”

Portland

2540 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd

Financial Aid available to those who qualify Accredited by NACCAS | Programs vary by location | Career Placement assistance for graduates For Gainful Employment disclosures, visit www.marinello.com/disclosure

Defining Beauty Education Since 1905

PRTMERC1108PRT

Marinello_PM(Portland)_103012_4.75x6.625_4clr.indd 1

marinello.com 10/30/2012 4:56:39 PM

In Other News

ust a few days before the election, state investigators swooped into the Clackamas County elections office on suspicion of felony-level ballot tampering. A volunteer elections worker is accused of filling in Republican choices for races that voters left blank, though it’s unclear whether the number of ballots affected is as few as two— or as many as 200. Clackamas has recently been plagued by elections problems, including in 2010 when the county office accidentally listed two races on the primary ballot that weren’t supposed to happen until November.

SARAH MIRK

Seattle and San Francisco, that would require larger employers to let workers accrue paid sick leave. About 40 percent of Portlanders in the private-sector lack paid sick time, which is about the norm for America. We’re the only developed, industrialized nation where sick leave is not a right guaranteed by federal law. SM

guaranteed paid sick leave? Worker advocates are pushing city council to consider an ordinance, similar to measures passed in

Reeves moved to Portland in the early 1990s and played quirky gigs around town, including hosting a public access TV show. SM

has passed away, PsayReeves Ballot friends of the well-known tampering, musician who often played cornet for commuters on the paid sick west end of the Hawthorne leave, and the Bridge. Amid rush hour traffic, Reeves, 56, regularly set death of a up a music stand and magic show on an outcropping of Portland curb, iconic in a white hould Portland become and Mickey Mouse hat.

S one of the few cities with icon. tuxedo instantly ortland’s “Working” Kirk

November 7, 2012 Portland Mercury 9

sexapalooza presents

explore. excite. enjoy.

explore

the adult fun show

excite

your love life

enjoy

free with your admission: main stage entertainment | workshops & seminars | product demonstrations | dungeon showcase educational videos | bodypainting | Sex Museum | Alley of Fantasy | fun contests | door prizes | shopping & so much more!

Portland

November 16-18, 2012 Oregon Convention Center - Hall C 777 NE Martin Luther King Junior Blvd. Portland, OR fri: 5pm-midnight | sat: noon-midnight | sun: 12-5pm $12 in advance | $15 at the door | $20 weekend pass

sexapalooza.us 10 Portland Mercury November 7, 2012

valid ONLY sund ay nov 18, 2012 CODE201 not to be com bined with any other promotions. not for resale. ticket value $15

50 shades of fun... featuring the

magic men

of sexapalooza on the main stage

Gossip

News

Feature

Picks

Music

Arts

Food

Fashion

Film

TV

Sex

Fun

d e t p u r r e t n I , y r e b b Ro

Found My I t h ig N e h T ism! Luck! o r e H ! is C. Theriault y n r e e v D y ie b h T ! it Sh

Y

OU HAVE SHIT to thank—because if it wasn’t for “shit,” I’d never have faced off with the two men accused of stealing my stuff, and you wouldn’t be reading this story.

It was late on a Tuesday in August. I was in the process of moving out of a St. Johns rental, and burned out after a day of helping put out the Mercury. But those boxes in the basement weren’t going to pack themselves—and, so, downstairs I went. Stink lines started stabbing my nostrils by the third or fourth stair. And, suddenly, I realized I had a much bigger problem than whether to pack yet another box of why-the-fuck-dowe-have-so-many-books or start in on the kitchen china. There, coming out of the basement drain was a disgusting eruption of feces turned back by an underground clog and left with nowhere better to go than the blue-painted basement floor of our duplex.

Cleaning supplies were required—normally not a problem, except that the heavy-duty stuff was all at the new house, which we’d been renovating for a month.

By then, it was close to 11 pm. My body was crying out for sleep.

But—hey!—there was hot shit in my basement. So on went my pants, and soon I was in the car making the two-minute drive to the new place. I parked in front like usual and went up the steps to the door, shrouded in darkness because the porch light was off.

I fumbled with the key. Then I stopped. The wind was howling.

And I could hear something clanging—the side gates, normally blocking the way from the driveway to a patio alongside the house.

I walked north along the front of the house. I grabbed hold of one gate and as I swung it over to its mate, I stopped again.

A black pickup was on the patio. Packed with boxes. My heart started pounding, and before I could do a damned thing, I was looking right at one of the men who’d been loading it up. And he was looking right back at me.

Truck ’s e ls E e n o e Stuff in Som

GONE, BABY, GONE

T

HIS IS WHEN Kris Henning, a criminal justice professor at Portland State University, tells me, in as many words, that I’m lucky.

Burglaries happen every day in Portland, in every neighborhood, and for a variety of reasons. And only in rare cases is a crook actually caught in the act or spotted by a neighbor while hauling away someone else’s stolen property.

Henning says the national clearance rate for burglary cases— based on arrests—is just 14 percent, and that it’s been that way for decades.

“Once an offender makes a getaway,” Henning says, “the odds of clearing a case are pretty slim.”

Some burglars are professionals who earn their living casing and robbing. But most residential jobs are usually the result of an opportunity that’s way too fucking tempting to pass up. Someone’s broke, with bills to pay or a collection agent breathing down their neck, or they’re looking for quick cash to get high. They see a door or a window left open or unlocked.

Or they notice a house, like ours, with no one home and a lot of equipment piled in a jumble.

They go in.

Henning says most burglars don’t leave behind much evidence when they raid a house for things like electronics or jewelry. And even though Portland cops have a pawn shop detail that combs through one of the more traditionally viewed outlets of stolen goods, there are too many other ways to dump the stuff. Craigslist and eBay and junkers and scrappers, according to news reports and police agencies, all wind up host to ill-begotten goods.

Police resources are so strapped that some cities won’t even send a cop out to take a report if it’s clear the burglar is long gone.

“CSI does not characterize what the real deal is,” Henning says, describing a fantasy world where forensics techs come out

Illustrations by

BT Livermore

to each and every ransacked home instead of focusing on shootings and violent crimes and other priorities. “We don’t have the resources for that.”

He’s right. According to Portland police stats, some 1,500 residential burglaries were reported in just the first six months of this year alone.

WAIT… IS THAT A CHIHUAHUA?

I

SHOULD HAVE been scared. But I wasn’t. I was angry.

And it didn’t hurt that the guy was shorter, skinnier, and more jittery than I was, and had the sour stink of booze floating from his unshaven mouth. He also looked familiar.

I went first, barking: “What the fuck is going on here?”

He shrank a little bit, backed toward the pickup truck, and stammered that he was “with the masonry company.” We were having work done on the chimney, but that would have been obvious to anyone who walked by and saw an inescapable wall of scaffolding.

I followed him slowly and got a good look at what was in the truck. I saw tools, but I also saw some shit a mason or laborer would have no need to be stacking in his personal vehicle: a still-in-the-box gas stove, several boxes of Ikea cabinets, countertops, some paintings and prints.

“You’re with the masonry company?” I shouted. “So why the fuck do you need my cabinets? And you’re drunk, aren’t you?”

He apologized for drinking, weirdly, and then tried to change his story. Instead, he was with the kitchen contractor. The driver’s side door of his truck was open and he got in, pleading that this was a misunderstanding and that I should let him drive off.

At this point, I’d noticed his accomplice. I was outnumbered, and that should have given me pause. But the other guy in the passenger seat was even less menacing. Why? Because he was

“CSI does not characterize what the real deal is. We don’t have the resources for that.”

................................................................................................ Continued on pg. 13

November 7, 2012 Portland Mercury 11

Fall Savings into

NEW

FULL

FRAME

24.3 MEGA

PIXELS

New Powerhouse!

Q Full-frame, FX-format CMOS sensor.

Q Full HD 1080p video.

Q Optional Wireless Mobile Adapter to connect to smartphones or tablets.

Q Compatible with the full range of NIKKOR lenses.

SAVE

100

$

wit wi D600 Bodyy with

B d Only O l D600 Body

* D600 with 24-85mm VR Kit reg price is $2699.99 less $100 instant savings.

Expires 11-17-12.

24 85 85mm VR VR LLens KITT 24-85mm 99* $

2,099

$

2,599

99

D7000 Body Only 99* $SAVE $

999

200

FINALLY SOMETHING TO HONK ABOUT, IF PORTLANDERS HONKED.

D7000 Body with 18-105mm VR Lens KIT

Amazing Performance!

1,29999* $SAVE 200

$

Q DX-format CMOS sensor.

Q 6 fps rapid shooting.

Q Low-noise ISO range 100-6400.

Q 1080p HD Movies with fulltime Autofocus.

D7000 Body with

16.2

85mm VR Lens

1,42999* $SAVE 300

$

MEGA

PIXELS

All the news and talk from your neighborhood. Finally in one place.

Create a free account today at everyblock.com.

* D7000 body only reg price is $1199.99 less $200 instant savings; D7000 with 18-105 VR Kit reg price is $1499.99 less $200 instant savings; D7000 with 85mm VR lens reg price is $1729.99 less $300 instant savings. Expires 11-17-2012.

Purchase the D600 or D7000 with these Lenses or Speedlights & get MORE INSTANT SAVINGS! 70-300mm f/4.5-5.6G ED Zoom-NIKKOR

24-85mm f/3.5-4.5 ED VR Zoom-NIKKOR

WAS $58999 W

WAS $59999

NOW

NOW

38999 $200 INSTANT $

WAS $1,04999 W

AFTER

Nikon SB-910 AF Speedlight

7 70-200mm VR II Zoom-NIKKOR

2,199

$

99

SAVINGS†

Nikon SB-700 AF Speedlight

NOW

WAS $32999 W

499 $50 INSTANT

$

$

Multnomah County Animal Services

99

AFTER

SAVINGS†

SAVINGS†

NOW

299 $30 INSTANT

99

AFTER

AFTER

200 INSTANT

$

AFTER

WAS $54999 W

WAS $2,39999 NOW

1,68999 $200 INSTANT

SAVINGS†

S SAVINGS†

Be a better neighbor.

NOW

$

AFTER

AFTER

SAVINGS†

WAS $1,88999

NOW

89999 $150 INSTANT

$

49999 $100 INSTANT

$

24-70mm f/2.8G ED Zoom-NIKKOR

28-300mm ED VR Zoom-NIKKOR lens

SAVINGS†

† Lenses and Speedlights must be purchased with the Nikon D800, D600, D7000 in order to receive Instant Savings. Expires 11-17-12.

16.0

COOLPIX S800c KIT INCLUDES

MEGA

PIXELS

Android™ Smart Device

Q

All the imaging power of a Nikon—superior optics, telephoto zooming, a high resolution image sensor and much more, meets the endless possibilities of the Android™ OS and Wi-Fi connectivity. † Nikon Coolpix S800c Kit reg price is $399.99 less $70 instant savings. Expires 11-17-12.

Camera Case

2 Year Extended Warranty ON SALE! 99† SAVE $ Q

329

70

$

COOLPIX AW100 KIT INCLUDES

16.0 MEGA

PIXELS

Q

Camera Case

2 Year Extended Warranty ON SALE! 99† $ S SA SAVE Q

Waterproof & Shockproof!

The Coolpix AW100 is ruggedly built for reliable and comfortable outdoor operation.

When you’re on the road it has GPS + e-Compass tracking too!

279

120

$

† Nikon Coolpix AW100 Kit reg price is $399.99 less $120 instant savings. Expires 11-17-12.

COOLPIX S6300 KIT INCLUDES

16.0 MEGA

Q

PIXELS

Freeze the Action Capture those elusive moments with the Nikon COOLPIX S6300. Its 10x optical Zoom-NIKKOR glass lens (25mm-250mm) brings your subjects pture ure up close and the CMOS sensor enables you to capture great images in low light. † Nikon Coolpix S6300 Kit reg price is $249.99 less $110 instant savings. Expires 11-17-12.

NIKON INC. LIMITED WARRANTY INCLUDED ©2012 NIKON INC. NIKKOR LENSES: ONE-YEAR LIMITED WARRANTY PLUS FOUR YEARS EXTENDED SERVICE COVERAGE.

www.ProPhotoSupply.com blog.prophotosupply.com 800-835-3314 HOURS

Q

Q

1112 NW 19th (at Marshall), Portland

MON 7:30-6:00

Q

TUES-FRI 8:30-6:00

Camera Case

2 Year Extended Warranty ON SALE! 99† SAVE $ Q

Q

12 Portland Mercury November 7, 2012

SAT 9:00-5:00

110

$

139

Visit our neighborhood cat adoption partners: Sellwood Dog Supply & Cat Annex......8334 SE 17th Ave, Portland Natural Pet Food Solutions.......7639 S.E. Milwaukie Ave, Portland Personal Beast................................................8119 SE Stark, Portland Pets On Broadway.....................2762 NE Broadway Street, Portland Beauty for the Beast..........................5215 N. Lombard St, Portland Meowhaus...........................................5244 NE Sandy Blvd, Portland

MULTCOPETS.ORG

News

Feature

Picks

Music

Arts

........................................................ Continued fom pg. 11

clutching, on his lap, a (surprisingly quiet and actually pretty cute) brown Chihuahua. Yes, a fucking Chihuahua.

Two thoughts sprang to mind. The skinny guy was fondling his keys, so the first was that I had to keep them there no matter what. The second was that I needed the cops.

While yelling at them, I’d unlocked my phone with my left hand at my side and started dialing 911.

Then while the phone was ringing, I impulsively reached forward and snatched away the keys.

Here, again, I was lucky. What could have been brutal turned slapstick.

He didn’t knife me as I tried to haul ass down the driveway. Or pull a gun. Or punch me. And neither did his friend. He just wanted his keys. So he wrapped me up from behind in a desperate bid to get them back. I played keep-away, flailing my half-trapped arms around like Robby the Robot from Lost in Space (a reference the more elderly grand jurors LOVED when I testified), until I could throw them somewhere safe.

This all took less than a minute. Freed, I announced that I was on the phone with 911.

The dispatcher told me not to confront anyone—smart advice, but a little too late. The Chihuahua-holder got out of the truck and started urging his friend, whom he identified as “Gabe,” “to unload the truck and let’s go.”

The cops rolled up, took my statement, handcuffed the Chihuahua man, and cleared the house. I thought they’d also grabbed Gabe, but he somehow escaped, and was nowhere to be found. Gabe’s friend apologized before being put in a squad car. His dog had to be taken downtown separately, to a kennel in Central Precinct. It bid adieu by pissing on the cop who took him away.

DON’T I KNOW YOU?

I

HARDLY SLEPT that night. A technician spent hours dusting for prints and snapping pictures, gleeful over a trove of evidence—boxes and a truck filled with fingerprints.

A team of burly detectives then showed up in an unmarked car and helped inventory and unload the truck, which was later towed away to the police bureau’s impound lot. I made it back to bed by 5 am.

The next morning, my wife and I headed back to the house to let the workers know what happened and ask if they were missing any tools. The mason who was working on the chimney asked what color the truck was (black). Then he asked me to repeat the guy’s name (Gabe). Turns out, Gabe really was on the job for the masonry company. He was a laborer, hired only a few weeks before. That’s why I’d vaguely recognized him. He’d probably figured out a way to let himself in.

Hearing all that—that he was a worker, not

Food

Film

TV

Sex

Fun

some shadowy figure casing the house from the outside—was a relief.

I began to wonder more about the men— particularly in light of the friend’s surprising apology.

The arrest report identified the friend as Brandon Lee Mares. His mugshot, taken that morning, captured the fright of a man who knows he’s just made a life-altering mistake.

His Facebook profile turns up photos with kids and, unsurprisingly, lots of dogs. Court papers confirm he’s never been arrested or convicted. Not once. But they also show he’s had a rough go in recent months: The 35-yearold is newly divorced (with no kids of his own), was working odd jobs, and had kicked a meth habit this spring. Since then, he’s been in Narcotics Anonymous and attending an outpatient rehab program.

In keeping with his remorseful stance, according to an affidavit, he almost immediately admitted his role in the burglary and said he knew he was headed to my house to do it.

Gabe, later identified as Gabriel Troy Egan, 36, slipped through the law’s fingers only a little while longer. He was too skittish to collect his last paycheck, where a sting would have been waiting, and an arrest warrant had to be sent out to Washington State, where he lived with roommates.

On August 31, 10 days after the burglary, cops in Longview finally caught up to him, pulling him over in a new (for him) truck.

Even still, he almost got away one more time.

He asked if he could be let out of handcuffs to call a friend to fetch his truck. The next thing the cop knew, Egan had took off again and was found hiding in the rafters of a nearby garage.

In court papers, he said he’s struggled with an addiction to opiates since he was 17—never completing high school and doing a sixmonth rehab stint a decade ago before finally settling into a methadone program for the past two years. He said his parents were drug addicts, too.

His conviction record—with seven felonies and 10 misdemeanors—reads like that of a man who’s struggled with an expensive drug habit: burglary, theft, attempting to elude officers, theft, heroin possession.

Property crimes—driven more by “economic and lifestyle issues” than other crimes, says Henning—often see “the highest rates of recidivism.”

“People with recurring involvement in the justice system usually have more than one problem,” he says, speaking not about my case but generally. “It’s not just drugs.

It’s the fact they have a poor employment history, or they hang out with others engaged in criminal activities. They usually have very difficult childhoods.”

Art + Craft Sale part of the 2012 Siren Nation Women’s Music & Arts Festival

JUSTICE IS SERVED?

A

S OF PRESS TIME, I’m scheduled to see both Egan and Mares in court this coming Tuesday, November 13. Mares is out on bail, given his lack of a record, but Egan’s been in jail in lieu of a $50,000 bond.

I thought I might wrestle more with the idea of pressing charges. But I didn’t—I didn’t want an extraordinary amount of justice, just the right amount. I was wronged; my castle had been breached.

But all that wasn’t even the worst part. Once the excitement died down, once it was all in the cops’ hands, I sat on the couch to think about how lucky I was—how this situation could’ve gone very, very wrong. That’s when I came to another realization: I still had an awful, drying explosion of shit in my basement to clean.

Yeah. Real lucky.

Sunday, November 11, 11-5 McMenamins Kennedy School 5736 N.E. 33rd Ave., Portland, OR

www.sirennation.com Explore a range of clever and beautiful art and crafts handmade by women artisans.

November 7, 2012 Portland Mercury 13

doubletee.com / roselandpdx.com

plays

ial very spec guests

NOV 8th • rOselaNd • 8pm • all ages

FeAT. syD ThA KyD & mATT mArTiANs oF oDD FuTure

sat NOV 17th • rOselaNd • 8pm • all ages

TRUST ROBERT DELONG NOV 14th • rOselaNd • 8pm • all ages

AvAilABle NoW

grouplovemusic.com November 19th • roselaNd • 8pm • all ages

Maniac Lok CHILLEST ILLEST STEADY THE BOSS

sat NOV 17th • rOselaNd • 8pm • all ages

NiT griT

& siDesTep

NOV 21st • rOselaNd • 8pm • all ages

Fontanelle, Dead in the Dirt & Loincloth

fri dec 14th • rOselaNd • 9pm • all ages

Mistah Fab MUMbLs

sat december 1st • roselaNd • 8pm • all ages 14 Portland Mercury November 7, 2012

december 13th • rOselaNd • 8pm • all ages

& cap 1

dec 20th • rOselaNd • 8pm • all ages

advaNce tickets through all ticketsWest locatioNs, safeWay, music milleNNium. to charge by phoNe please call 503.224.8499

Picks

My, What a Busy Week!

OUR ARTS AND ENTERTAINMENT PICKS FOR THE WEEK OF NOVEMBER 7-13

Wednesday, November 7

CANUCK STARS—Canada has given us so much over the years: maple syrup, rotary snowplows, and Stars (the band, not the burning ball of gas). With that angsty, sparsely populated sound we’ve come to expect from our Northern neighbors, the Toronto band produces hot jams akin to Broken Social Scene or Metric. So put on your good muff and come on out, eh? RF w/Jets Overhead; Aladdin Theater, 3017 SE Milwaukie, 8 pm, $20, all ages

Thursday, November 8

LEGOS—This is Portland. Toys aren’t just for kids, for better or for worse, which is why the monthly Brick or Block Lego Tournaments at Cruzroom have become such cutthroat affairs. Co-presented with ShanRock’s Triviology, come prepared to marvel at the amount of creativity your citymates have to burn on Legos. AH Cruzroom, 2338 NE Alberta, 7 pm (limit 8 teams, 2-6 people per team), FREE NERD ALERT—We’re already fans of the Doubleclicks, Portland’s own charming nerdfolk duo.

But if that wasn’t enough, tonight they’re putting on #NerdNightOut—in which they’ll be joined by comedians Tim Hammer and Erik Charles Nielsen, and YouTube ukulele sensation Molly Lewis.

Excellent. EH Curious Comedy Theater, 5225 NE MLK, 7:30 pm, $8

SIRENS—This year’s Siren Nation Festival, a cityye wide celebration of women’s work across creative d fields, runs throughout the month with art, films, and a crafts. Tonight kicks off its killer music lineup with La Sera, EMA, and JD Samson and MEN. The rest of e the fest sees performances from Alela Diane, Jolie S Holland, Rebecca Gates, and more. MS m, Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi, 9 pm, e $15, sirennation.org for complete schedule

Friday, November 9

NORM—Mumbling, irreverent, with a weird undercurrent of pure nihilism— Norm MacDonald’s comedy isn’t for everyone, but the converted know that he’s one of the best stand-ups working today. Comedy fans won’t want to miss this one. AH Helium Comedy Club, 1510 SE 9th, Thurs 8 pm, Fri-Sat 7:30 & 10 pm, $25-35

HUMP ME!—It’s here! HUMP! America’s favorite amateur porn festival—and this year there are more five-minute films, fun, and sexual hijinks than ever! We guarantee you’ll say, “WOW. I’ve never seen that before,” in between squeals of glee, laughter, and yes, even horniness. WSH Cinema 21, 616 NW 21st, Thurs-Sun, portlandmercury.com/hump for times & tickets, $15

Saturday, November 10 DIVE IN—Two straight-up divey rock ’n’ roll bands team up for a night at Portland’s only dive bar with a functional fireplace. Barely drinking-age kids White Fang open up for gnarly old-school rockers Pierced Arrows tonight among the Tonic Lounge’s stiff drinks and smelly dance floor. SM w/K-Tel ’79; Tonic Lounge, 3100 NE Sandy, 9:30 pm, $7

FINE ART—It’s time to consider retiring that “Guernica” print in favor of some original art, and Disjecta’s annual art auction is just the place to do it. Cultivate your inner art collector by bidding on work from more than 50 participating local artists, plus debonair emceeing from AC Dickson. AH Disjecta, 8371 N Interstate, 7 pm, $20-25, 21+

Sunday, November 11

LEONARD—The songs of Leonard Cohen may be painful and sad, but they’re legendary in their beauty. Few have put as transcendent a point on melancholy as this elder statesman of folk (and beyond) music.

His influence will stretch on for centuries, but you may be running out of time to see him perform the canon live. MS Rose Garden, 1 Center Ct, 8 pm, $39.50-250, all ages

FASHION HOTEL—What’s sexier than meeting a stranger at a hotel? Meeting all your favorite Portland fashion designers, goods creators and models at the Ace Hotel. Sexy! At Content, local creatives take over 28 rooms to show off their lovelies with pomp and flair. Plus you can shop their merchandise at the Cleaners. CF Ace Hotel, 1022 SW Stark, 5-10 pm, $15-20, all ages

Monday, November 12 HUMBLE & HILARIOUS—Ellen Forney is the best! It’s rare to find such creativity mixed with such humility, but maybe the Seattle cartoonist explains how she came to be so awesome in her new graphic memoir. Marbles: Mania, Depression, Michelangelo, and Me explores bipolar disorder through Forney’s typically hilarious comics. SM Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside, 7:30 pm, FREE

YOUNG HICKORY—The ranks of Andrew Jackson Jihad have swollen. The invigorating folk-punk duo is performing as a quartet on this tour, and their enhanced size is the perfect accompaniment to their raucous, purgative live show. With uplifting anthems and bitter ballads, AJJ might be the best thing to ever come out of Phoenix. NL w/Future of the Left, Jeff Rosenstock; Backspace, 115 NW 5th, 7:30 pm, $13, all ages

Tuesday, November 13 CELEBRATION ROCK—Proving that rock ’n’ roll will truly never die, Vancouver duo Japandroids deliver pure fireballs of fist-pumping energy. “Epic” is a sorely overused word these days, but make no mistake: Japandroids’ life-affirming, explosive rock is fucking epic. Get there early for the marvelous Bleached, who are the kind of band you wish Best Coast had turned out to be. NL Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell, 8:30 pm, $16, all ages

BRUNDLEFLY—In 1986, David Cronenberg and Jeff Goldblum unleashed the clever horror classic The Fly—in which a well-meaning scientist (Goldblum) gets his DNA scrambled with that of a housefly.

Then pieces of him start falling off. See every disgusting detail in 35mm! EH Hollywood Theatre, 4122 NE Sandy, see Movie Times on pg. 39 for showtimes, $5-7 November 7, 2012 Portland Mercury 15

MERCURY / DANTE’S & STAR + PIZZA isto ric

The Newly Restored

Historic WW / DANTE’S & STAR

LiveMusic, Music,Cabaret, Cabaret,Burlesque Burlesque&&Rock-n-Roll Rock-n-Roll Live

MERCURY / DANTE’S & The New ly Res tore d His tori c

503-226-6630 • Open Daily 11am-2:30am •

d.com

L!

S

w w w. da n tes l i ve . c o m

THURSDAY crazy delicious

comedy

NOV 8

K EL

TICA ICA

ARET

IC OWN!

AKE

R

FERNO P

POLECAT

D AND.COM

ONSTERS

IONS BAND

EATH

Starring AUGGIE SMITH

$5 ADV - 9PM

Plus Ian Karmel • Xander Deveaux • Stephanie Purtle Hosted by Trevor Thorpe with DJ Mez Matos

KET IE

FRIDAY

electrifying italian indie folk rock

Mbrascatu

NOV 9

FREE SHOW!

E FREW SHO

with sad little man

TWO COW GARAGE THE COPYRIGHTS

SATURDAY

NOV 10

$10 ADV 9:30PM

THE COPYRIGHTS

I CAN LICK ANY SOB IN THE HOUSE TRUCKSTOP DARLIN

SUNDAY

Best Show Burlesque,“The Firedancers In Town!”

DJs, Magic & Debauchery!

NOV 11

NOV 12

So You Wanna Be A ROCK STAR ?

9pm - SQUIDLING BROS FREAKSHOW

NOV 13

10pm $3

8pm Showtime

KARAOKE WITH A LIVE BAND FOR ANOTHER 20 YEARS !

CHUCK’N’BUCK DSL THE

TUESDAY

COMING SOON

NOV 14 $17 ADV 9PM

S H O W

open mic comedy with hostess dirt starr love

WEDNESDAY THE WARD YA G GRAMM WINNRIN LEANS NEW SOS BAND! A R B

REBIRTH REBIRTH BRASS BRASS BAND BAND WITH

LOVEBOMB GOGO MARCHING BAND & MANIMALHOUSE

THURSDAY

NOV 15 $8 ADV 9PM

ALABAMA BLACK SNAKE THE HUGS

11/7 Free Rock Show 11/8 Crazy Delicious Comedy 11/10 Two Cow Garage 11/11 Squidling Bros FreakShow & Sinferno Cabaret 11/12 Karaoke From Hell 11/13 Chuck-n-Buck Show 11/14 Rebirth Brass Band 11/15 Spittin’ Cobras 11/18 Saloon Ensemble & Sinferno Cabaret 11/29 Sonic Smackdown 11/30 Eric McFadden 12/1 Cherry Poppin’ Daddies 12/2 Mickey Avalon & Sinferno Cabaret 12/6 Sonic Smackdown 12/7 Miss Exotic Finals 12/8 Hillstomp 12/9 Jet Black Pearl & Sinferno Cabaret 12/13 Corrosion of Conformity 12/14 Nicky Croon & The Swingin’ Richards 12/15 High On Fire 12/16 Miss Kennedy’s Cabaret 12/18 Wayne Hancock 12/21 Monsters Of Rock 12/29 The Spazmatics TICKETS AVAILABLE @ DANTE’S, STAR THEATER AND WWW.DANTESLIVE.COM OR CALL 503-345-7892

SATURDAY

DEC 1

DEC 2

$20 ADV 8PM

DEC 8

$8 ADV 9:30PM

FRIDAY NOV FRIDAYNOV Plus Ian9Karmel • Xander Deveaux • Stephanie Purtle MUSIC

MARK PETER FRIDAY BUCK EITZEL

$12 ADVANCE TICKETBISCUIT 9PM SHOWTIME

Hosted CLUB Thorpe with DJ Mez Matos FROM R.E.M.by Trevor electrifying italian indie folk rock

Mbrascatu SATURDAY NOV 10 SATURDAYNOV NOV 9

FREE SHOW!

E FREW SHO

ROCKING SOULFUL INDIE FOLK FROM KENTUCKY SINGERCELLIST WITH LUKE REYNOLDS

with sad little man

BEN SOLLEE TE SATURDAY LA PROJECT:NEUROTICA NEUROTICA TWO COW OW!10PROJECT: NOV SH MYTHS & LEGENDS

$12 ADVANCE TICKETBISCUIT - EARLY SHOW 7PM - 6PM DOORS

ME 10PM SHOWTI E $10 ADVANC IT TICKETBISCU

GARAGE

A NEO-BURLESQUE CABARET

THURSDAY NOVANY 15 SOBSONIC THURSDAYNOV I CAN LICK IN THE HOUSE SMACKDOWN! TRUCKSTOP TRUCKSTOP DARLIN DARLIN

TENTACLE BURN + NEVER AWAKE “The Best Show Firedancers AMERAKIN In Town!” OVERDOSE Magic & Debauchery!

SUNDAY DJs,+Burlesque, MONDAY NOV 11

NOV 12

Karaoke FromHellHell Karaoke From SINFERNO ROSEHIP

FRIDAY NOV 16

SINNSAVVY PRODUCTIONS PRESENTS

$15 ADVANCE TICKETBISCUIT - 9PM SHOWTIME

So You Wanna Be A ROCK STAR ?

cabaret

REVUE

KARAOKE WITH A LIVE BAND FOR ANOTHER 20 YEARS !

9pm - SQUIDLING BROS FREAKSHOW

CHUCK BUCK THE

H TUESDAY O SATURDAY NOV 17 SATURDAYNOV 17 NOV 13 W ’N’ mic comedy with hostess dirt starr love DSL open 10pm $3

THE MY OH MYS WEDNESDAY

$7 ADVANCE TICKETBISCUIT - 9PM SHOWTIME

8pm Showtime

NOV 14NOV 23 CD RELEASE FRIDAY FRIDAYNOV PARTY! NICHOLE COOPER SUNDAY NOV 25 SUNDAYNOV

S

COMING SOON

11/7 Free Rock Show 11/8 Crazy Delicious Comedy 11/10 Two Cow Garage 11/11 Squidling Bros FreakShow & Sinferno Cabaret 11/12 Karaoke From Hell 11/13 Chuck-n-Buck Show 11/14 Rebirth Brass Band $12 ADV TICKETBISCUIT - 8:30 SHOWTIME - 8PM DOORS 11/15 Spittin’ Cobras TOP FLYTE WITH ENTERTAINMENT 11/18 Saloon Ensemble PRESENTS LOVEBOMB GOGO & Sinferno Cabaret MARCHING BAND 11/29 Sonic Smackdown THE & MANIMALHOUSE 11/30 Eric McFadden KING OF 12/1 Cherry Poppin’ Daddies $20 ADVANCE TICKETBISCUIT - 9PM SHOWTIME SURF GUITAR 12/2 Mickey Avalon & Sinferno Cabaret 12/6 Sonic Smackdown Miss Exotic Finals 12/7 NOV 15 12/8 Hillstomp 12/9 Jet Black Pearl $8 ADV 9PM & Sinferno Cabaret 12/13 Corrosion of Conformity 12/14 Nicky Croon & The $15 ADVANCE TICKETBISCUIT - 9PM SHOWTIME Swingin’ Richards 12/15 High On Fire 12/16 Miss Kennedy’s Cabaret 12/18 Wayne Hancock PDX’S OWN 12/21 Monsters Of Rock TRADITIONAL 12/29 The Spazmatics FOLK-AMERICANA THE WARD YA GRAMM ING S WINN RLEAN O NEW SS BAND! BRA

$7 ADVANCE TICKETBISCUIT - 9PM SHOWTIME

$17 ADV 9PM

REBIRTH REBIRTH BRASS BRASS WEDNESDAY NOV 28 WEDNESDAYNOV28 BAND BAND

DICK DALE THURSDAY

WORLD/INFERNO FRIENDSHIP O’DEATH SOCIETY

THURSDAY DEC 66 THURSDAYDEC

FRIDAY DEC 7 BLACK SNAKE FRIDAYDEC ALABAMA STRING BAND QUINTET

TICKETS AVAILABLE @ DANTE’S, STAR THEATER AND WWW.DANTESLIVE.COM OR CALL 503-345-7892

WITH POLECAT

YOB &

SAVIOURS

S MATISIC SPAZHR OD IACS THE

& THE AP

$20 ADV 8PM

HILLSTOMP

YOB

SATURDAY

S ATIC ZMOD A P S CS IA IS WEDNESDAY NOV HR 28

THE LEGENDARY

$10 ADV 9:30PM

& THE AP STAR THEATER

w w w. da n tes l i ve . c o

THURSDAY crazy delicious

comedy

NOV 8

Plus Ian Karmel • Xander Deveaux • Stephanie Pur Hosted by Trevor Thorpe with DJ Mez Matos

BABY LE STRANGE • VERA MYSTERIA • LADY STOCKHOLM • FLUER DE SEL • ROCKET THE ASSETTES • GOLDIE GOODNIGHT • AERIALIST JOLENE • COUNTESS VALKYRIE

FRIDAY NOV 99 FRIDAYNOV

FROM AMERICAN MUSIC FROM R.E.M. CLUB

MARK PETER BUCK EITZEL

$12 ADVANCE TICKETBISCUIT 9PM SHOWTIME

SATURDAY NOV 10 SATURDAYNOV

ROCKING SOULFUL INDIE FOLK FROM KENTUCKY SINGERCELLIST WITH LUKE REYNOLDS

BEN SOLLEE LATE PROJECT:NEUROTICA NEUROTICA SHOW! PROJECT: MYTHS & LEGENDS

$12 ADVANCE TICKETBISCUIT - EARLY SHOW 7PM - 6PM DOORS

A NEO-BURLESQUE CABARET

THURSDAY NOV 15 THURSDAYNOV 15 $12 ADVANCE TICKETBISCUIT - 9PM SHOWTIME

SONIC SMACKDOWN!

TENTACLE BURN + NEVER AWAKE + AMERAKIN OVERDOSE

FRIDAY NOV 16 16

SINNSAVVY PRODUCTIONS PRESENTS

$15 ADVANCE TICKETBISCUIT - 9PM SHOWTIME

RELEASE FRIDAY NOV 23 CD FRIDAYNOV PARTY! NICHOLE COOPER SUNDAY NOV 25 SUNDAYNOV $7 ADVANCE TICKETBISCUIT - 9PM SHOWTIME

$12 ADV TICKETBISCUIT - 8:30 SHOWTIME - 8PM DOORS

TOP FLYTE ENTERTAINMENT PRESENTS

THE KING OF SURF GUITAR

DICK DALE

WORLD/INFERNO FRIENDSHIP O’DEATH SOCIETY

THURSDAY DEC 6 THURSDAYDEC 6 $15 ADVANCE TICKETBISCUIT - 9PM SHOWTIME

PDX’S OWN TRADITIONAL FOLK-AMERICANA STRING BAND QUINTET

MORE SHOWS SHOWS

SH

TWO CO GARAGE THE COPYRIGHTS

SATURDAY

NOV 10

$10 ADV 9:30PM

THE COPYRIGHTS

I CAN LICK ANY SOB IN THE HOUSE TRUCKSTOP DARLIN

SUNDAY

Best Show Burlesque,“The Firedancers In Town!”

DJs, Magic & Debauchery!

NOV 11

MONDAY NOV 12

Karaoke FroFr SINFERNO Karaoke

So You Wanna Be A

cabaret

10pm $3

KARAOKE WITH A FOR ANOTHER 2

CHUCK’N’BUCK DSL THE

open mic comedy with hostess dirt starr love

WEDNESDAY

COM SO

NOV 14 $17 ADV 9PM

S H O W

THE WARD YA G GRAMM WINNRIN LEANS O W E N SS BAND! A BR

REBIRTH REBIRTH BRASS BRASS BAND BAND WITH

LOVEBOMB GOGO MARCHING BAND

& MANIMALHOUSE

THURSDAY

NOV 15 $8 ADV 9PM

ALABAMA BLACK SNAKE THE HUGS

11/7 Free R 11/8 Crazy D 11/10 Two C 11/11 Squidlin & Si 11/12 Karao 11/13 Chuck 11/14 Rebirt 11/15 Spitt 11/18 Saloo & Si 11/29 Sonic 11/30 Eric M 12/1 Cherry P 12/2 Mick & Sin 12/6 Sonic S 12/7 Miss E 12/8 Hills 12/9 Jet Bl & Si 12/13 Corrosi 12/14 Nicky Swing 12/15 High 12/16 Miss Ke 12/18 Wayn 12/21 Mons 12/29 The S

TICKETS AVAIL STAR TH WWW.DAN OR CALL

SATURDAY

WITH POLECAT

& THE NIGHT SEGALL BEATS

TICKETS ON SALE SOON!

FR

with sad little man

8pm Showtime

THE MY OH MYS

MONDAY DEC 31 MODAAYDEC

Mbrascatu

TUESDAY

$7 ADVANCE TICKETBISCUIT - 9PM SHOWTIME

FRIDAY DEC 7 FRIDAYDEC

electrifying italian indie folk rock

FREE SHOW!

NOV 13

SATURDAY NOV 17 SATURDAYNOV 17

$20 ADVANCE TICKETBISCUIT - 9PM SHOWTIME

FRIDAY

NOV 9

9pm - SQUIDLING BROS FREAKSHOW

ROSEHIP REVUE

WEDNESDAY NOV 28 WEDNESDAYNOV28

Starring AUGGIE SMI

$5 ADV - 9PM

A STEAMPUNK NEW YEAR’S EVE WITH

TICKETS AVAILABLE AT STAR THEATER, DANTE’S AND WWW.STARTHEATERPORTLAND.COM OR CALL 503-345-7892

NOV 8 - SIGN OF THE BEAST BURLESQUE: METAL MONSTERS NOV 9 - MARK EITZEL & PETER BUCK NOV 10 - EARLY SHOW 7PM - BEN SOLLEE NOV 10 - LATE SHOW 10PM - PROJECT NEUROTICA NOV 15 - SONIC SMACKDOWN NOV 16 - ROSEHIP REVUE NOV 17 - MY OH MYS + JACOB VAN AUKEN NOV 25 - ANUHEA & FULL BAND + POSITIVE VIBRATIONS BAND NOV 23 - NICHOLE COOPER CD RELEASE NOV 28 - DICK DALE NOV 30 - SORRY DEVILS DEC 1 - DEATH GRIPS DEC 2 - BARFLY XMAS PARTY DEC 4 - 2012 STRIPPIE AWARDS DEC 6 - WORLD/INFERNO FRIENDSHIP SOCIETY + O’DEATH DEC 7 - FRUITION & POLECAT DEC 8 - GIGGLE & BLUSH PEEPSHOW DEC 11 - KOPECKY FAMILY BAND DEC 13 - TY SEGALL & NIGHT BEATS DEC 15 - ALT-J DEC 16 - QUEENS OF THE POLE XMAS SHOW DEC 31 - ABNEY PARK & WANDERLUST CIRCUS

DEC 1

$15 ADV 9:30PM

SUNDAY

DEC 2

$20 ADV 8PM

MICKEY AVALON

SATURDAY

DEC 8

$8 ADV 9:30PM

HILLSTOMP

THURSDAY

DEC 13

$18 ADV 9PM

SATURDAY DEC 15

$16 ADV 9PM

WITH GOATWHORE + LO-PAN + APE MA

SATURDAY

DEC 29

$10 ADV 9:30PM

MATISII SPEAAPZHR OD THE

& TH

$20 ADVANCE TICKETBISCUIT 9PM SHOWTIME

DICK DALE

16 Portland Mercury November 7, 2012

METAL MONSTERS METAL

TY

NOV 8 - SIGN OF THE BEAST BURLESQUE: METAL MONSTERS $8 ADV NOV 9 - MARK EITZEL & PETER BUCK 9:30PM NOV 10 - EARLY SHOW 7PM - BEN SOLLEE NOV 10 - LATE SHOW 10PM - PROJECT NEUROTICA NOV 15 - SONIC SMACKDOWN NOV 16 - ROSEHIP REVUE NOV 17 - MY OH MYS + JACOB VAN AUKEN NOV 25 - ANUHEA & FULL BAND + POSITIVE VIBRATIONS BAND & DEC NOV 23 13 - NICHOLE COOPER CD RELEASE ADV NOV 28 - DICK DALE$18 SAVIOURS 9PM NOV 30 - SORRY DEVILS DEC 1 - DEATH GRIPS DEC 2 - BARFLY XMAS PARTY DEC 4 - 2012 STRIPPIE AWARDS DEC 6 - WORLD/INFERNO FRIENDSHIP SOCIETY + O’DEATH DEC 15 DEC 7 - FRUITION & POLECAT ADV DEC 8 - GIGGLE &$16 BLUSH PEEPSHOW DEC 11 - KOPECKY9PM FAMILY BAND WITH GOATWHORE + LO-PAN + APE MACHINE DEC 13 - TY SEGALL & NIGHT BEATS DEC 15 - ALT-J DEC 16 - QUEENS OF THE POLE XMASTHE SHOW DEC 31 - ABNEY PARK & WANDERLUST CIRCUS

DEC 29

BABES AS BEASTS TAKE IT OFF TO CLASSIC METAL!

$12 ADVANCE TICKETBISCUIT - 9PM SHOWTIME

TICKETS AVAILABLE AT STAR THEATER, DANTE’S AND WWW.STARTHEATERPORTLAND.COM OR CALL 503-345-7892

SATURDAY

$10 ADVANCE TICKETBISCUIT - 9PM SHOWTIME

THURSDAY DEC 13 THURSDAYDEC 13

A STEAMPUNK NEW YEAR’S EVE WITH

THURSDAY

SIGN OF THE BEAST BURLESQUE PRESENTS

FRUITION

AVALON

SATURDAY SHOWS MORE DEC 8

THURSDAY NOV 8 THURSDAYNOV

$10 ADVANCE TICKETBISCUIT - 9PM SHOWTIME

SUNDAY MICKEY MONDAY MODAAYDEC DEC 2 DEC 31 TICKETS ON SALE SOON!

503-226-6630 • Open Daily 11am-2:30am •

www.StarTheaterPortland.com

ME 10PM SHOWTI E $10 ADVANC IT TICKETBISCU

$12 ADVANCE TICKETBISCUIT - 9PM SHOWTIME

& THE NIGHT TY SEGALL BEATS

$16 ADV 9PM

$10 ADV 9:30PM

Starring FROM AMERICANAUGGIE SMITH

$5 ADV - 9PM

$15 ADV $12 ADVANCE TICKETBISCUIT - 9PM SHOWTIME 9:30PM

WITH GOATWHORE + LO-PAN + APE MACHINE

DEC 29

NOV 8

SATURDAY

HILLSTOMP

$18 ADV 9PM

SATURDAY

comedy

BABY LE STRANGE • VERA MYSTERIA • LADY STOCKHOLM • FLUER DE SEL • ROCKET THE ASSETTES • GOLDIE GOODNIGHT • AERIALIST JOLENE • COUNTESS VALKYRIE

DEC 1 THURSDAY DEC 13 THURSDAYDEC 13

SATURDAY DEC 15

METAL MONSTERS THURSDAY crazy delicious

FRUITION

THURSDAY

DEC 13

wBEASTS w wTAKE. dIT OFF a TOnCLASSIC t e sMETAL! l i ve . c o m BABES AS

THE HUGS

MICKEY AVALON

SATURDAY

SIGN OF THE BEAST BURLESQUE PRESENTS

$10 ADVANCE TICKETBISCUIT - 9PM SHOWTIME

$10 ADVANCE TICKETBISCUIT - 9PM SHOWTIME

$15 ADV 9:30PM

SUNDAY

503-226-6630NOV • Open Daily THURSDAY 8 11am-2:30am • THURSDAYNOV

THE COPYRIGHTS

FromHelHell l Karaoke From SINFERNO Karaoke cabaret

www.StarTheaterPortland.com

$10 ADV 9:30PM

MONDAY

Live Music, Cabaret, Burlesque & Rock-n-Roll

TH LE

D

Music

UP & COMING

Thriller Night

O

Twenty Years of Thrill Jockey by Ryan J. Prado

N THE CUSP of Thrill Jockey’s 20th anniversary as one of the most eclectic producers of independent music in the world, obvious retrospective inquiries are expected of founder Bettina Richards.

But according to her, the sterling repThrill utation of her brainchild is still as Jockey’s much in the present as in the past.

20th “I didn’t really think about Anniversary what the label would mean,” she Fri Nov 9 Mississippi Studios says. “I certainly hoped that it would make an impact for the art3939 N Mississippi ists that we chose to work for.”

BARN OWL Richards founded Thrill Jockey in TRANS AM 1992 after leaving a position as an A&R representative at Atlantic Records, around the time other influential labels like Merge and Matador were just beginning—and who were themselves disciples of the artist-forward tenets of DC’s Dischord and Chicago’s Touch and Go. Twenty years later (and with all but Touch and Go still in operation), it’s clear this loud revolution of independent music is far from subsiding. To celebrate, Richards has forged a spate of anniversary shows in London, New York, San Francisco, San Diego, Los Angeles, LIZ CARUANA Baltimore, and Portland.

Thrill Jockey’s catalog now spans three that we feel compelled to put out,” says Richdecades, including the accessible jazz-pop of ards. “We can’t help ourselves! It’s not really the Sea and Cake, the enigmatic post-rock whether this is a good idea business-wise, it’s lullabies of Tortoise, and the genre-defying more like, ‘This record is so absolutely deliMatmos. All the way back to its first release cious that I can’t stop myself.’”

That enthusiasm transfers over to releasby Austrian prog band H.P. Zinker, the label— which started in New York before Richards es of projects that feature hyper-complicatmoved to Chicago in ’95—represents a hugely ed mash-ups of distilled, ambient noise and varied and unpredictable slice of underground otherworldly soundscapes. It’s the big risks rock, electro, ambient, drone, bluegrass, and that yield the bigger rewards, according to everything in between. It’s a compulsive sort Richards, and besides, she says, “I’m not of roster that Richards admits is defined by gonna tell you what to put on your record, because if I could make that record, I should her enormous fanaticism of new sounds.

“Our core value as a label is wanting to put make it myself.”

Oregon has begun to play a significant out music we think pushes the boundaries and

This Week’s Music Previews

WEDNESDAY 11/7 STARS, JETS OVERHEAD (Aladdin Theater, 3017 SE Milwaukie) See My, What a Busy Week!, pg. 15.

THURSDAY 11/8 SIREN NATION FESTIVAL: JD SAMSON AND MEN, EMA, LA SERA (Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi) See My, What a Busy Week!, pg. 15.

CRUSHED OUT, NEW YORK RIFLES

LITURGY

RYAN MUIR

MIKE SCHEIDT

MV & EE, LOST CREEK RAMBLERS, BRUMES

JUSTINE MURPHY

role in the Thrill Jockey canon, with locals like Eternal Tapestry (and their side projects Tunnels and Plankton Wat), Golden Retriever, Jason Urick, and Eugene’s Mike Scheidt of YOB rounding out a spectrum-spanning contingent. Each of those artists is part of the Portland 20th anniversary show at Mississippi Studios on November 9, along with Trans Am, Liturgy, and Barn Owl. “All the bands from Portland have this quality of abandon,” says Richards. “I think they clearly would be doing it whether anybody was listening or not, which is a quality that always has appealed to me—that someone is so devoted in exploring their craft.”

Portland Thrills: A Snapshot of Some Recent Portland-Based Thrill Jockey Releases Eternal Tapestry A World out of Time Portland’s kings of the psych-jam séance are approaching a fertile renaissance: A World out of Time marks the band’s third album for Thrill Jockey in les s t h a n two years. With that kind of output, expectations for overindulgence or shtick could be reasonably stratospheric. Instead, Eternal Tapestry’s stream-of-consciousness meditations slither through fussy lead guitars, dynamic jam-rock noodling, and cosmic explorations of sound with a grounded chaos. Sure, the 12-plusminute opener “When I Was in Your Mind” sometimes sounds like nine different bands playing at the same time. But when all the elements of these dark wormholes realign

(like on the excellently meandering tripper “The Weird Stone”), it’s a fantastic voyage into the heart of acid-house hubris. RJP

Golden Retriever Occupied with the Unspoken On their fi rst LP for Thrill Jockey, Golden Retriever (Jonathan Sielaff and Matt Carlson) stamps a new sonic high-water mark, achieving a symbiosis of intuitive symphonic composition and complex ambient layering. It’s the kind of record that induces you to stare at the wall until paint speckles morph and dance around, a lovely cacophony of polyphonic music made from monophonic instruments. Industrial-sounding tracks like “Eudaimonia” percolate in tics and winks like an epileptic fever dream, while album opener

(Hawthorne Theatre Lounge, 1507 SE 39th) Remember the band Boom Chick? No? Well, it’s probably better if you don’t—they’re called Crushed Out now, so that’s the name you need to know. Crushed Out’s great new album, Want to Give, sees the Brooklyn duo of guitarist/singer Frank Hoier and drummer Moselle Spiller bashing out terrific-sounding rock ’n’ roll, digging up echoes of Buddy Holly, Dick Dale, and of course the White Stripes. With stripped-down arrangements and great songs, Crushed Out sound ready for anything.

NED LANNAMANN

“Serene Velocity” articulates a deepsea weave of contrasting rhythms and textures, highlighted by modular dolphin cries. RJP

Jason Urick I Love You Jason Urick’s third release for Thrill Jockey is maybe the most consciously unstable of his career. Having written it during a time of transition, Urick’s deconstruction of place and time manifests in oddly organic-sounding strokes of ambient wanderlust.

Warm, humanistic tones spill out of laptop opuses l i k e “A g e l e s s Isms”; as such, a robotic hybrid of emotional drone and evocative noise comes together in a beautiful little dance that maybe only Urick knows the steps to. RJP

(Little Axe Records, 5012 NE 28th) Self-described as “lunar raga,” MV & EE (Matt Valentine and Erika Elder) clearly have a strong enough familiarity with off-kilter melody to accurately label themselves as such. But it’s not only “lunar” raga—it’s an Americana raga, which is as interesting to listen to as it is to say out loud. Imagine Neil Young’s and Pink Floyd’s languidness combined with the unsettled temperament of Tim Kinsella’s music and you’d get, well, the aural depiction of what it’s like to peel off an acid trip while floating down a river. A really bright, tinny, waveless river. Considering they’ve put out over 30 releases in the past decade, it’s not incredibly surprising that their lineage floats on and off of apparent improvisation, but that feel is the flesh and blood of their ideological sound. It all comes off effortlessly, as if they couldn’t stop making music even if they tried. JONATHAN MAGDALENO

SONS OF HUNS, BLACK SKIES, CALTROP, BISON BISON (Slabtown, 1033 NW 16th) I only learned about Sons of Huns in February, with the release of their 11-track Live at the Banana Stand recording. I didn’t know anything about them when I started listening; five minutes later, that live album—which sounds fantastic—had effectively annihilated every trace of wintry sluggishness from my brain. Nothing clears the cobwebs from the attic like some metal in the garage. A few months later, they have a new 7-inch with an accompanying video for “Leaving Your Body,” evidence of a true commitment to disseminating their eyebrow-singeing rock to the masses. Unlike most garage acts these days (and there are a lot of them), Sons of Huns aren’t a retro act.

They don’t sound like star-struck fans of the Ramones, the MC5, or the Stooges. Revisiting the past can be a lot of fun, but hard rock has a future, and Sons of Huns are writing it. REBECCA WILSON

FRIDAY 11/9

MARK EITZEL, PETER BUCK (Star Theater, 13 NW 6th) Mark Eitzel has a long history of spinning sad drunken barroom songs. But people grow up. So the heralded singer/songwriter, who spent a fair amount of his time at the helm of American Music Club singing about getting drunk bellied up at the bar, is now focusing more of his great storytelling abilities on tales of dinner parties and guests who bring terrible bottles of wine. This laidback approach to partying suits the folksy songs of Eitzel, as shown on his new solo album Don’t Be a Stranger. His Americana-rich voice has all the lonely yearning of the past, with his trademark funny and smart and self-deprecating lyrics, like in album highlight “Oh Mercy,” where he sings, “Please, please invite me to your party… I

Continued on page 19

THIS WEEK ON THE MERCURY ’S MUSIC BLOG Music

BASIN & RANGE TOUR DIARY!

ALL NOVEMBER LONG

Free

WIN TICKETS TO SEE TITUS ANDRONICUS! THURSDAY!

Comment on these stories at portlandmercury.com

Tweet

OUR DUMB TWEETS

FOLLOW @ENDHITS ON YOUR TWITTER MACHINE

November 7, 2012 Portland Mercury 17

Fri 11/9

The Sumner Brothers Mike Coykendall Widower 9:30 p.m.

A Benefit for the Oregon Bluegrass Association

Sat 11/10

Josh Cole Band Stumbleweed 9:30 p.m.

Sun 11/11

Daniel Rodriguez (of Elephant Revival)

The Sale 7 p.m.

Tue 11/13

The Vespers King Clifton 8:30 p.m.

thursday, november 8 5:30 p.m. is “eagle time”

brothers oF the hound

Laura IvancIe steph InFectIon and the heebIe JeebIes dna 8:30 p.m.

FrIday, november 9 5:30 p.m. is “eagle time”

reverb brothers saturday, november 10 4:30 p.m. is “eagle time”

the student Loan monday, november 12

InFInIty oF It aLL twItch· scott deans 8:30 p.m.

COMING SOON: 11/16 11/17

jaCkStraw the lONeSOMe bIllIeS the blaCkberry buSheS

18 Portland Mercury November 7, 2012

(5 0 3) 2 3 2 - 0 0 5 6

bookingeastend@gmail.com

Music

You Could Get Lost Out Here “W

A.C. Newman’s AM Gold by Ned Lannamann

ITH THE New Pornographers, I’ve never really been trying that hard to make a big statement about anything,” says Carl Newman. “I was just trying to make rock records. So I had to do this before I go back to my day job of making rock records.”

It’s easy to slap the “personal solo album” sticker onto Shut Down the Streets, the third solo record he’s released as A.C. Newman, especially if you directly compare it to the string of acclaimed albums from his Vancouver, BCbased all-star group the New Pornographers.

(Newman has since relocated to Woodstock, New York.) With Streets, Newman reflects on A.C. NEWMAN Easy listening. two massive events in his life: the death of his NOAH KALINA mother and the birth of his son. While New- sive songs Newman’s ever recorded, and the man’s melodies remain as intoxicating as ever, album proceeds in a predominantly calm and the music is softer and subtler, and his lyrics commanding vein. Along the way, there’s the are the most direct and personal he’s written, Pornographers-esque romp of “Encyclopedia of Classic Takedowns,” the meditative, hoperelying on honesty rather than wordplay. ful “Strings,” and the devastated closer, “I had a very specific thing I wanted “They Should Have Shut Down the to do with this record,” he says. “I A.C. Streets,” which deals directly with just wanted to do a straightforward Newman the death of Newman’s mother. record that touched on that stuff.

Sat Nov 10 “It was the first time where, And that was about it.”

Doug Fir especially when I was writing Musically, the album mirrors 830 E Burnside the lyrics, I thought, most of these Newman’s upbringing on AM radio, songs are going be about a specific departing from the occasionally bathing,” Newman says. “And some of the roque and martial arrangements on Newman’s excellent 2009 solo album Get Guilty. things in there are fairly easy to pick out— This time, Gerry Rafferty was a touchstone: there’s definitely the theme of my mom, and “I found myself listening to ‘Baker Street’ my son being born, and of going away and and just thinking, ‘What a brilliant arrange- seeking out solitude. There’s even the one ment,’” Newman says. “Not that I was copying song that’s just about how absurd making muit, but it was in my mind when I was arranging sic is to me, in the middle of it all; all these songs. Trying to make it sort of psychedelic, huge things are surrounding you in life, and you look at what you do for a living and it but in this easy-listening ’70s way.

“The radio hits that I grew up listening to, seems like such a farce.”

Shut Down the Street’s candid veraciousness I’ve always just absorbed a lot of that stuff,” Newman continues. “And I think that has may have been a direct response to what Newalways snuck into my music a lot more than man was dealing with, but the result is some anything I studied later. Like, I’ll always love of his most compelling work. Still, he underthe Monkees. I feel like there will always be plays its frankness, saying it was something some of the Monkees in me, because that was he had to get through his system in order to the music I loved when I was a really little return to the more playful elements of his betkid. And yeah, AM radio, or Gerry Rafferty, ter-known band. “I think to a certain degree I or the Cars, or whoever you might want to put made this record as a sort of palate cleanser,” says Newman. “I felt like, I’ve got to do somein there.”

Streets opens with the stunning “I’m Not thing like this, and now that I’ve done it, I can Talking,” one the most succulent and pen- go back and do other things.”

UP & COMING

This Week’s Music Previews

Continued from page 17

haven’t talked to anyone in days/but look I brought all this imported beer.” Then he gets all drunk and sloppy in the kitchen after enchanting everyone with erudite conversation. I guess some things don’t change—you can count on Eitzel’s well-crafted songs and lost weekends. With longtime collaborator R.E.M.’s Peter Buck on the same bill, this should be a grown-up evening of slow-sipping songs. COURTNEY FERGUSON

SIREN NATION FESTIVAL: ALELA DIANE, JESSE SYKES, ANTJE DUVEKOT (Alberta Rose Theatre, 3000 NE Alberta) This year’s Siren Nation Festival—empowering women of all ages to create their own art, and highlighting the many achievements of women in the arts—is a many splendored thing. With performances across the city for five days straight, your show-going docket ought to be filled. Alela Diane’s unwavering tribal folk is practically an institution. Diane spent the early part of this year scaling back her bulging live band (of which her father is a member), and instead revisited her roots

www.eastendpdx.net

weds. 1 1/7 - Rabbits, owl, crag dweller, heavy voodoo thurs. 1 1/8 - industrial park, blue rituale, cellmate fri. 1 1/9 - mR. Loveless(sf), the queued up, a happy death

sat. 1 1/17 - 800 octane, thundering asteroids, stumblebum

as a solo performer after splitting from Rough Trade Records. Her upcoming album, likely to be released by someone early next year, is tentatively titled About Farewell, and according to Diane is “basically a public recitation of my diary.” That sound you just heard is everyone in Portland sighing in joy at the same time.

RYAN J. PRADO

JEFFREY LEWIS AND THE JUNKYARD, FELSEN, NEW MEXICAN REVOLUTION (Backspace, 115 NW 5th) I regret enlisting a laughably trite opening line like this, but how come Jeffrey Lewis isn’t huge? There’s no doubt that he’s one of the best lyricists currently producing music—easily right up there with John Darnielle—but how many more fucking records does this guy have to make (including various collaborations, he’s released over 20) until he achieves anything that even remotely resembles a break? Why isn’t he selling out arenas or making national television appearances or gaining recognition as one of the greatest songwriters of his generation? It seems like Lewis occupies somewhat of a blind spot: too “creepy” and emphatic and genuinely nerdy (not like Rivers Cuomo or Michael Cera adorable-nerdy) to appeal to any facet of the mainstream, while the parochial pitchfork-wielding critics have consistently accused him of mere Richman imitating. Those people don’t know what love is and are bad at listening to music. “Don’t Be Upset” is a perfect mid-autumn jam, and several others come close. MORGAN TROPER

Continued on page 21 November 7, 2012 Portland Mercury 19

THURSDAY!

DONNA The BUFFALO

•

$10 ADVANCE

+BROTHERS COMATOSE

FRIDAY NOVEMBER 9

SIREN NATION FESTIVAL PRESENTS

AC NEWMAN SATURDAY!

FRIDAY!

MICHNA GIRLFRIENDS +YOURSELF & THE AIR

THURSDAY NOVEMBER 8

A SPECIAL EVENING WITH THE INSANELY TALENTED LEADER OF THE NEW PORNOGRAPHERS

•

$15 ADVANCE

+HARRIET

SATURDAY NOVEMBER 10

•

$15 ADVANCE

INCENDIARY GARAGE-PUNK FROM LEGENDARY NYC TRIO

REBECCA GATES

D RTLAN O P AL GIN Y STYLE I R O ENCH FR

MAKE IT A NIGHT

•

$10 ADVANCE

TRANSCENDENT ELECTRO-POP FROM TORONTO

DIAMOND

830 E BURNSIDE • 503-231-WOOD • www.dougfirlounge.com

DOUG FIR RESTAURANT + BAR OPEN 7AM–LATE EVERYDAY SERVING BREAKFAST, LUNCH, DINNER, LATE-NIGHT. HAPPY HOUR 3-6 PM EVERYDAY, COVERED SMOKING PATIO, FIREPLACE ROOM, LOTS OF LOG. LIVE SHOWS IN THE LOUNGE...

RINGS

TICKETS

+QUASI

GOING FAST

MONDAY NOVEMBER 12

•

$15 ADVANCE

MIND-BLOWING ELECTRO POP FROM BUZZ-WORTHY PDXER

ONUINU

AC REˆ P

+YENTA (formerly Clea Partridge)

SUNDAY NOVEMBER 11

+MINDEN

+GOLD FIELDS

WEDNESDAY NOVEMBER 14 •

$10 ADVANCE

A CO-HEADLINE EVENING OF STELLAR CANADIAN INDIE AND ALT-ROCK

WINTERSLEEP

AN EVENING WITH ELOQUENT AND SOULFUL SINGER/ SONGWRITER

RACHAEL YAMAGATA

THURSDAY NOVEMBER 15

•

$8 ADVANCE

FRIDAY NOVEMBER 16

•

$12 ADVANCE

CRITICALLY ACCLAIMED DOOM SOUL FROM UK SINGER/ SONGWRITER

COLD SPECKS

SATURDAY NOVEMBER 17

•

$14 ADVANCE

A THANKSGIVING EVE HONKY TONK WITH

DENVER

YARDS

.le www

SUNDAY NOVEMBER 18

•

$6 ADVANCE

POST-THANKSGIVING EVENING OF STRING-BENDING MADNESS

LEFT COAST

COUNTRY

RAYMOND BYRON

& THE WHITE FREIGHTER

+BLIND BARTIMAEUS

TUESDAY NOVEMBER 20

•

$10 ADVANCE

+MERIDIAN

WEDNESDAY NOVEMBER 21 •

$8 ADVANCE

AN INTIMATE EVENING WITH POWERHOUSE TRIO OF ESTABLISHED

RNDM

A CO-HEADLINE EVENING OF EPIC PDX RAWK!

The

PRIDS THE UPSIDEDOWN +MIRACLE FALLS

SATURDAY NOVEMBER 24

•

$8 ADVANCE

IN MUSIC WE TRUST PRESENTS THEIR FINAL DF SHOWCASE

WILL WEST & THE FAMILY STRANGERS

+LINE & CIRCLE

SUNDAY NOVEMBER 25

$5 ADVANCE

$16 ADVANCE

A CO-HEADLINE EVENING OF BUZZ-WORTHY GOODNESS

DEEP SEA DIVER WILD BELLE +LEMOLO

MCDOUGALL +FOREIGN TALKS

WEDNESDAY NOVEMBER 28 •

•

THURSDAY NOVEMBER 29

•

$12 ADVANCE

BRAD PARSONS BAND +BEN LARSEN & JACK DWYER DUO

FRIDAY NOVEMBER 23

•

$8 ADVANCE

LEGENDARY ALT-POP FROM BELOVED ENGLISH SINGER/SONGWRITER

WORLD PARTY

+THE WINDSOR PLAYER

MONDAY NOVEMBER 26

•

$22 ADVANCE

Astronautalis/Busdriver 12/10 The Dandy Warhols 12/16 - All Ages Matinee/21+ WEINLAND NYE Supergroup 12/31 Marco Benevento 2/8 Mouse On Mars 2/19 All of these shows on sale at Ticketfly.com

FEDERALE 11/30 • BRAINSTORM 12/1 • WHITEHORSE 12/4 • WOVENHAND 12/5 • THE CAVE SINGERS 12/6 HOW TO DRESS WELL 12/7 • TRIXIE WHITLEY 12/8 • KING TUFF 12/9 • THE MOTHER HIPS 12/15 • SUPERSUCKERS 12/29 ADVANCE TICKETS AT TICKETFLY - www.tickfly.com and at JACKPOT RECORDS • SUBJECT TO SERVICE CHARGE &/OR USER FEE ALL SHOWS: 8PM DOORS / 9PM SHOW • 21+ UNLESS NOTED • BOX OFFICE OPENS 1/2 HOUR BEFORE DOORS • ROOM PACKAGES AVAILABLE AT www.jupiterhotel.com

20 Portland Mercury November 7, 2012

IE

1 NW

BAR AND T N A AUR T 258 S .226.1 RE • 5 03 6TH

USA AVE

5PM-1:30AM RI/ S AT T• F IGH COCKTAILS N ID ING RV

A WELCOME AFFAIR FOR PDX INSTRUMENTAL POST-ROCKERS

ED ROMANOFF +ADRIEN REJU ELLIOTT BROOD +THE WOODEN SKY

ER

101 1

Present that night’s show ticket and get $3 off any entree Sun - Thur in the dining room

THE MYNABIRDS

UR 5P NOW M-M SE

EL TEN ELEVEN

GENRE DEFYING ECLECTIC-AMERICANA FROM NY STATE

MON -T H

EXPERIMENTAL WALL-OF-SOUND POST-ROCK FROM SO-CAL DUO

happy.com

Music

UP & COMING

This Week’s Music Previews

Continued from page 19

THRILL JOCKEY RECORDS 20TH ANNIVERSARY SHOW: TRANS AM, LITURGY, ETERNAL TAPESTRY, BARN OWL, MIKE SCHEIDT, GOLDEN RETRIEVER, JASON URICK (Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi) See Music, pg. 17.

SATURDAY 11/10 PIERCED ARROWS, WHITE FANG, K-TEL ’79 (Tonic Lounge, 3100 NE Sandy) See My, What a Busy Week!, pg. 15.

AC NEWMAN, HARRIET (Doug Fir, 830 E Burnside) See Music, pg. 19.

PSYCHIC TV, DBC, KING DUDE, VICE DEVICE (Rotture, 315 SE 3rd) Genesis Breyer P-Orridge (born Neil Megson) has changed a lot over the past four decades—both musically and physically through work with proto-industrial band Throbbing Gristle and psychedelic rock unit Psychic TV, and P-Orridge’s pandrogynous morph in honor of late wife Lady Jaye.

Genesis is living, breathing art, and continues to make art, as well as continuing to create music under the Psychic TV moniker. The band just released the 12inch Silver Sundown Machine vs. Alien Lightning Meat Machine, their first in five years, and the evolution of the music and Genesis herself seems endless.

MARK LORE

TWO COW GARAGE, TRUCKSTOP DARLIN’, THE COPYRIGHTS, I CAN LICK ANY SONOFABITCH IN THE HOUSE (Dante’s, 1 SW 3rd) Columbus, Ohio’s Two Cow Garage don’t get to the West Coast nearly as often as they ought to, what with them being musical kindred spirits to Portland’s I Can Lick Any Sonofabitch in the House and all. The band—led by gravel-throated vocalist/guitarist Micah Schnabel—boasts a rabid following for its ornery hybrid of rough-and-tumble punk rock opuses and Springsteenish pageantry, probably most affectingly on the 2008 LP Speaking in Cursive. The band followed up that effort with 2010’s Sweet Saint Me, released on Suburban Home Records, and is now just inches away from a vinyl reissue of their 2004 release, The Wall Against Our Back. Expect a rowdy dust-up of larynx-shredding anthems, loud rock ’n’ roll and earnest sentiment by a bunch of dudes (including ICLASOBITH) who sound like they could beat the shit out of you, but probably won’t. RJP

SUNDAY 11/11 SIREN NATION FESTIVAL: CARINA ROUND, ROSI GOLAN (Alberta Rose Theatre, 3000 NE Alberta) Fans of Puscifer—one of the side projects of Tool’s Maynard James Keenan—will recognize singer Carina Round, as she has lent her vocal talent to that project. But Round’s solo career is what’s really worth paying attention to. The British-born, LA-based singer/songwriter released the excellent Slow Motion Addict in 2007 and the even better Tigermending earlier this year. With macabre, powerful, adult pop, Round is a force of nature. Almost no one showed up at her last Portland gig, so she took the opportunity to drink a lot of whiskey and get to know the tiny crowd. Even then, Round put on a great show—so don’t miss this one. NL

BRANDI CARLILE, BLITZEN TRAPPER (Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside) The Pacifi c Northwest exports a lot of melodious Americana, and now two of the most widely loved are sharing the stage. Blitzen Trapper, of course, needs no introduction, which must be why they’re opening. Out with her fourth LP is country songstress Brandi Carlile. Hailing from the boonies of Washington, Carlile grew up obsessed with Patsy Cline. She doesn’t seem to have grown out of this, and that’s why I fi nd her so compelling. Her fourth album, Bear Creek, is a soulful, leisurely album, easy to listen to, with a few soundtrack-ready singles. The album gracefully confronts the blahs of turning 30 in a surprisingly mature way. But Carlile is nothing if not backward gazing, and her sweetly textured voice is meant for country. That’s probably why I favor her more oldtimey songs (“Keep Your Heart Young” and the gospel tune “Raise Hell”) over the incursions into roots rock (“Hard Way Home”). RW

SIREN NATION: REBECCA GATES, THE MYNABIRDS, YENTA (Doug Fir, 830 E Burnside) The first (and only) time I saw the Mynabirds was at Pickathon this summer. Yes, Laura Burhenn was wearing that wolf hat you see in photos, and yes, she took command of the nighttime crowd and had everyone dancing in the moonlight.

Generals is a strong, exclamatory follow-up record that was apparently inspired by the Avedon photo “Generals of the Daughters of the Revolution.” To say the album is solely about female empowerment would be untrue, but there is a political charge to it, paired with poppy dance beats, anthem-like lyrics, and blues guitar. The more I listen to her music, the more I don’t want to miss her at this year’s Siren Nation Fest, where we’ll be able to catch her as part of the new generation of revolutionary women. RACHEL MILBAUER

GENERATIONALS, RACES (Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi) New Orleans duo Generationals make pop music that’s instantly catchy and instantly familiar. It’s also difficult to pin down exactly where their hearts reside, as members Ted Joyner and Grant Widmer cycle through American and British pop from the ’60s through the ’80s. Maybe that’s where the name comes from. If anything, Generationals’ brand of pop will take you back to your youth—summers off, school dances, growing pains. If you’re presently living this glorious period in your life, Generationals are here for you. The bonus is they’ll hopefully open your ears to a flood of great music that came before them. ML

GENDERS, THE BLACK APPLES, WOODWINDS (Rontoms, 600 E Burnside) When Portland group Youth split earlier this year, members Maggie Morris, Stephen Leisy, and Matthew Hall quickly picked up the pieces and formed Genders, adding drummer Katherine Paul (Forest Park) to round out the new group. Now Genders is releasing their debut EP, a self-titled, three-track record that’s sparkly, buoyant, and forlorn—the group describes themselves as “psych-pop-mope-dance” and it’s tough to find something more precise than that. Their EP is excellent, highlighted by “Sugarcoat,” a yearning pop tune that shifts from calm and collected, to soaring with abandon with the shrugging shift from chorus to verse. Genders celebrate the release of their EP with LA’s the Black Apples and Woodwinds, the project of Megan Spear of Jared Mees and the Grown Children, who also have a new record released tonight. NL

Museum by MOONLIGHT at the World Forestry Center

Enjoy free drink samples and a special viewing of our current exhibit, Timberrr!

A Nostalgic Look Back at Working in the Woods.

Thursday, Nov. 15 6:00-8:30pm

Special after-hours event for those 21+

Discovery Museum www.worldforestry.org

Dress in your best flannel, suspenders or beard and admission is only $5!

LEONARD COHEN (Rose Garden, 1 Center Ct) See My, What a Busy Week!, pg. 15.

LOSS, WORM OUROBOROS, DISEMBALLERINA, EPHEMEROS (Rotture, 315 SE 3rd) All right, you seasonally depressed heshers out there, stop pining for the return of the sun—because Portland’s newest doom troop Ephemeros is here with the soundtrack you need for your weather-induced despair. A Portland all-star band of sorts, Ephemeros features members from such faded greats as Anon Remora, Nux Vomica, and El Cerdo. For those who like their heavy emotions complemented by equally heavy riffs, Ephemeros provides the desolation and sadness you crave via some serious sonic devastation. Think Pallbearer, but with much harsher vocals and a smidge less melody. Bring a hefty bag of juicy imaginary oranges ripe for the squeezing, because this is epic, claw-raising shit. ARIS WALES

STATIONTOSTATION: HOLCOMBE WALLER (The Secret Society, 116 NE Russell) It’s a live show and a recording session: StationToStation is the brainchild of engineer Sean Flora, who captures bands in the live setting for an internet simulcast (radio.seanflora.net) and a rebroadcast on KZME 107.1 at a later date. Tonight StationToStation’s subject is Portland songwriter Holcombe Waller, who you last saw playing keys for Menomena, and has some new material to share. I think the idea is that this concert/session will provide recorded material for Waller’s next album, although both he and Flora likely won’t know for sure until they see what’s on the tape. At any rate, Waller is worth seeing in any capacity, playing subtle but knifetwisting folk that dances with the elements, sung in an elastic voice with a remarkable range. NL

MONDAY 11/12 ANDREW JACKSON JIHAD, FUTURE OF THE LEFT, JEFF ROSENSTOCK (Backspace, 115 NW 5th) See My, What a Busy Week!, pg. 15.

TUESDAY 11/13

JAPANDROIDS, BLEACHED (Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell) See My, What a Busy Week!, pg. 15.

November 7, 2012 Portland Mercury 21

BIG ENOUGH TO SHARE. Scorpion Bowl Cocktails

3267 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Open Everyday 2pm-2:30am

3 Locations Open 24HRS!!!

22 Portland Mercury November 7, 2012

Music

Live Music

squarepegconcerts.com

LISTINGS

This

sat

WEDNESDAY 11/7

★ ALADDIN THEATER—Stars, Jets Overhead, 8 pm, $20 ALBERTA ROSE THEATRE—Woman of Heart and Mind: A Joni Mitchell Birthday Tribute: Anne Weiss, Kris Deelane, Bre Gregg, Paula Sinclair, Sue Zakolar, Dan Gaynor, 8 pm, $10-12 AL’S DEN—Mishka Shubaly, 7 pm, free ANDINA—Jason Okamoto, 7 pm ASH STREET SALOON—42 Ford Prefect, Blackout Dates, Jonesmore, 9:30 pm, $5 BACKSPACE—The Volt Per Octaves, Rainbows, 9 pm, all ages BIDDY MCGRAW’S—Half-Step Shy Happy Hour: David Gerow, 6 pm, all ages BLUE DIAMOND—The Fenix Project, 9 pm BUFFALO GAP—Andy Stokes, 9 pm CAMELLIA LOUNGE—The Goods Jazz Jam: Errick Lewis & the Regiment House Band, 8:30 pm ★ DOUG FIR—Rags & Ribbons, The Horde & The Harem, The Ascetic Junkies, 9 pm, $5 DUFF’S GARAGE—High Flyers, 6 pm, $2; Suburban Slim’s Blues Jam: Suburban Slim, John Neish, Jeff Strawbridge, 9 pm EAST BURN—Irish Music Jam, 7 pm ★ EAST END—Rabbits, Owl, Crag Dweller, Heavy Voodoo, 9 pm EDGEFIELD—Crown Point, 7 pm, free ELLA STREET SOCIAL CLUB—Alto, Cool Hair, Subject Body, Painted Debris, 9 pm, $3 EUGENIO’S—Open Mic, 6:30 pm FIRE ON THE MOUNTAIN—Kory Quinn, 9:30 pm GOOD NEIGHBOR PIZZERIA—Open Mic GOODFOOT—Garcia Birthday Band, 9 pm, $5 GROOVE SUITE—Low Limit, The Great Mundane, Graintable, Brownbear, 10 pm, $5-7 ★ HOLOCENE—Slim Fortune, Sun Angle, XDS, No Tomorrow Boys, DJ Pretty Ugly, 8:30 pm, free ISLAND MANA WINES—David & Goliath, 4 pm IVORIES—Dave Fleschner, Alan Hagar, 7:30 pm, $5 JADE LOUNGE—Hazel Rickard, 7 pm; Adria & Friends, 7 pm JIMMY MAK’S—Mel Brown Quartet, 8 pm, $5 KAUL AUDITORIUM, REED COLLEGE—We’ll Meet Again: The Songs of Kate Smith: Stephanie Blythe, 7:30 pm KELLS—Bill Tollner, 9 pm KELLY’S OLYMPIAN—Yo Adrian, Absent Minds, Smash Bandits, 9 pm, $5 THE KNOW—Vattnet Viskar, Chasma, Spectral Tombs, 8 pm LANDMARK SALOON—Bob Shoemaker, 6 pm; Jake Ray & The Cowdogs, 9:30 pm LAURELTHIRST PUBLIC HOUSE—Renegade Stringband, 6 pm; Counterfeit Cash, 9 pm, free MISSISSIPPI PIZZA PUB—Mr. Hoo, noon, all ages; Samsel & the Skirt, 9:30 pm ★ MISSISSIPPI STUDIOS—Those Darlins, Heavy Cream, Don’t, 9 pm, $12 MUDDY RUDDER—Sleepy Eyed Johns, 8 pm O’CONNORS VAULT—Jon Koonce & One More Mile, 8 pm, free THE PRESS CLUB—Ezra Holbrook, 8 pm RED ROOM—Open Mic, 9 pm ROCK BOTTOM BREWERY—Jordan Harris, 9 pm ROSE GARDEN—Unashamed: LeCrae, Trip Lee, Tedashii, Pro, KB, Andy Mineo, 7 pm, $19.50, all ages ★ SOMEDAY LOUNGE—Siren & the Sea, Native Siblings, Hustle & Drone, Albatross, 9 pm, $6 SUNDOWN PUB—SongWrecker Cabaret, 9 pm TIGER BAR—Silencer, 9 pm, $5 TONY STARLIGHT’S—Mel Kubik, Christopher Woitach, 7:30 pm, $8 VIE DE BOHEME—Solomon Douglas, 8 pm, $8 THE WAYPOST—Classical Revolution, 7 pm ★ WHITE EAGLE—The Royalty, Grand Tarantula, Bend Sinister, The Hoons, 9 pm, $10-12

THURSDAY 11/8 ALBERTA ROSE THEATRE—Caravan of Thieves, 8 pm, $10-12 AL’S DEN—Mishka Shubaly, 7 pm, free ANDINA—Greg Wolfe, 7 pm ARLENE SCHNITZER CONCERT HALL—The Fresh Beat Band, 6:30 pm, $46.50-129.50, all ages ARTICHOKE MUSIC—Songwriter Roundup, 7 pm, $5 ASH STREET SALOON—Brohers of Destruction, Antique Scream, Ion Storm, 9:30 pm, $5

& sara Jackson-holman

saturday nov 10 aladdin theatre 3017 Se milWaukie ave · Portland, or · 7:30Pm ShoW · all ageS ticketS at all ticketmaSter locationS · charge By Phone 1-800-745-3000

CRUSHED OUT

“the gentle giant”

Hawthorne Theatre Lounge, Thurs 11/8 GRIFFIN DAVIS

BACKSPACE—To the Wind, Troubled Coast, The Goddamned Animals, Habits, AAPOAA, 7:30 pm, $7, all ages BERBATI—Koonda Holaa, Papaye, John Makay, 9:30 pm BIDDY MCGRAW’S—Vanport Drifters, 9 pm BLUE DIAMOND—Ben Jones, 9 pm BLUE MONK—The Beat of Empowerment: The Boomers, Mexican Gunfight, John Lamb, Dustin Silva, 7 pm, $10 BRASSERIE MONTMARTRE—Alan Jones Jazz Jam, 8 pm BUFFALO GAP—Stephen Baker, The Breaking Yard, 8:30 pm, free CAMELLIA LOUNGE—Laura Berman, 8 pm, $10 CORKSCREW WINE BAR—Sellwood Jazz Ensemble, 8 pm ★ CURIOUS COMEDY THEATER—#NerdNightOut: The Doubleclicks, Molly Lewis, 7:30 pm, $8 DOUG FIR—El Ten Eleven, Michna, Girlfriends, Yourself & The Air, 9 pm, $10-12 DUFF’S GARAGE—Tough Love Pyle, 6 pm, $2; Laurie Morvan, 9 pm EAST END—Industrial Park, Blur Ritual, Cellmate, 9 pm EAT: AN OYSTER BAR—Steve Cheseborough, 7 pm EDGEFIELD—Michele Van Kleef, 7 pm, free THE ELIXIR LAB—Johnny D’s Community Jam, 7 pm FOSTER & DOBBS—JP Hoe, 8 pm, $25 GOODFOOT—The Way Downs, The Keplers, 9 pm GRAND CAFE/ANDREA’S CHA CHA CLUB—Pilon d’Azucar Salsa Band, 9:30 pm HALIBUT’S—Terry Robb, 8 pm, free HAWTHORNE THEATRE—She & Her Sister, Out of Place, The Charlie Darwins, Endless Loop, Bleeding the Raines, Lumus, Bomb Shel, Mutagen, Guillotine, Great Dain, $11-13, all ages ★ HAWTHORNE THEATRE LOUNGE—Crushed Out, New York Rifles, 8:30 pm, $7 HEATHMAN—Johnny Martin, 7 pm ★ HOLOCENE—The We Shared Milk, Bear & Moose, Eidolons, 8:30 pm, $5 IVORIES—Bridging the Gap, 8 pm, $7 JADE LOUNGE—Andrew Norsworthy, Dan Weber, 8 pm JIMMY MAK’S—The Clayton Brothers, 9:30 pm, $20-25; Mel Brown B3 Organ Band, 8 pm, $5 KELLS—Bill Tollner, 9 pm KELLY’S OLYMPIAN—Highway, Ryan Traster, 9 pm, $5 KENTON CLUB—The Overs, 9 pm, free ★ THE KNOW—Bloodmoon, Lamprey, Order of the Gash, 8 pm LANDMARK SALOON—The Pickups, 8:30 pm LAURELTHIRST PUBLIC HOUSE—Lewi Longmire Band, 6 pm; Jim Page, Billy Oskay, 9:30 pm ★ LITTLE AXE RECORDS—MV & EE, Lost Creek Ramblers, Brumes, 8 pm MISSISSIPPI PIZZA PUB—Mo Phillips, Johnny & Jason, 6 pm ★ MISSISSIPPI STUDIOS—Siren Nation Festival: JD Samson & MEN, EMA, La Sera, 9 pm, $15 MOCK CREST TAVERN—Claes of the Blueprints, 8:30 pm MT. TABOR THEATER—Great American Taxi, Poor Man’s Whiskey, 8:30 pm, $13; Cody’s Wheel, Fireflyz, The Real, 9 pm, $7 MUDDY RUDDER—Brooks Robertson, 8 pm THE PRESS CLUB—Kin Trio, 8 pm QUIMBY’S AT 19TH—Chris Baum Project, 9 pm, free RED ROOM—Erik Anarchy, Town & The Writ, Super Desu, God Bless America, Cancer & the Rat, Dovehead, Solar Cellar, 8 pm, $5 ROSELAND—Datsik, 8 pm, $20, all ages ★ THE SECRET SOCIETY—Lone Madrone, 6 pm, all ages; Siren Nation Festival: Ezza Rose, Sara JacksonHolman, Cabin Project, 9 pm, $6 SHAKER AND VINE—Bass Mandolin, 8 pm, $5 ★ SLABTOWN—Sons of Huns, Black Skies, Caltrop, Bison Bison, 9 pm, $5 SLIM’S—Chautauqua, 9 pm, free THE TARDIS ROOM—Blue Milk, 8 pm THIRSTY LION—Eric John Kaiser, 8 pm TIGER BAR—Karaoke from Hell, 9:30 pm, free TONIC LOUNGE—Manx, Snarl, Child Bite, Bottom Feeders, 9 pm TOWNSHEND TEA HOUSE—East Forest, 7 pm, $10-20

★ Means we recommend it. To list your live music or DJ event, send your information at least nine days in advance to music@portlandmercury.com).

On Sale

Fri 10:00AM

thursday november 15 elsinore theater 170 high St Se · Salem, or 7:30Pm ShoW · all ageS ticketS at SafeWay/ticketSWeSt locationS charge By Phone 503-224-tiXX

tuesday april 23 elsinore theater

170 high St Se · Salem, or 7:30Pm ShoW · all ageS ticketS at SafeWay/ticketSWeSt charge By Phone 503-224-tiXX

Straight No Chaser tuesday november 27 arlene schnitzer concert hall

1037 SW BroadWay · Portland, or ·8:00Pm ShoW · all ageS ticketS at all ticketmaSter locationS charge By Phone 1-800-745-3000

KopecKy DADDIES Cherry Poppin’ saturday dec 1 dante’s

1 SW 3rd ave · Portland, or · 8:30Pm ShoW · 21 & over ticketS at SafeWay/ticketSWeSt charge By Phone 503-224-tiXX

Family Band

tuesday december 11 star theater 13 nW 6th ave Portland, or 9:00Pm ShoW · 21 & over ticketS at SafeWay/ ticketSWeSt locationS charge By Phone 503-224-tiXX

& henry at War

saturday dec 15 mississippi studios

3939 n miSSiSSiPPi ave · Portland, or 8:30Pm ShoW · 21 & over ticketS at SafeWay/ticketSWeSt locationS charge By Phone 503-224-tiXX

Randy Rogers Band Wade Bowen thursday January 17 mississippi studios 3939 n miSSiSSiPPi ave · Portland, or 8:00Pm ShoW · 21 and over ticketS at SafeWay/ticketSWeSt locationS charge By Phone 503-224-tiXX

November 7, 2012 Portland Mercury 23

SAT 11/10 - NEW MONSOON FRI 11/9 - DJ AQUAMAN’S SOUL STEW THURS 11/8 - THE WAY DOWNS, THE KEPLERS WED 11/7 - GARCIA BIRTHDAY BAND MON - SONIC FORUM - OPEN MIC TUES 11/13 - FREE!!! - SCOTT PEMBERTON TRIO WED 11/14 - THE DEAD KENNY G’s (Skerik, Mike Dillon, Brad Hauser) THURS 11/15 - OTIS HEAT, YOGOMAN BURNING BAND FRI 11/16 - DJ AQUAMAN’S SOUL STEW SAT 11/17 - TAPWATER, McTUFF TUES 11/20 - FREE!!! - SCOTT PEMBERTON TRIO

GOODFOOT

4P 5 PINB OOL TABLES ALL MA CHINES DRINK EVERY& DRAW SUN

irs upsta aily d open :30 5-2 airs st downn at 9 ope w nights o on sh

2845 SE STARK * WWW.THEGOODFOOT.COM * 503.239.9292 24 Portland Mercury November 7, 2012

Music

Live Music

LISTINGS

TWILIGHT CAFE & BAR—Roadkill Carnivore, Burning Monk, Raw Dog & the Close Calls, 7:30 pm, $3 VELO CULT—Worlds Collide: Acoustic Jewish Folk: Beth Hamon, 7 pm, $5-10 VIE DE BOHEME—Rob Scheps Big Band, 8:30 pm WHITE EAGLE—The Brothers of the Hound, 5:30 pm, free, all ages; Laura Ivancie, Steph Infection & the Heebie Jeebies, DNA, 8:30 pm, free WILF’S—Mike Horsfall, Karla Harris, 7:30 pm

FRIDAY 11/9 ALADDIN THEATER—Los Lobos, 8 pm, $40-45 ★ ALBERTA ROSE THEATRE—Siren Nation Festival: Alela Diane, Jesse Sykes & Phil Wandscher, Antje Duvekot, 9 pm, $12-15 AL’S DEN—Mishka Shubaly, 7 pm, free ANDINA—Sambafeat, 8 pm ARLENE SCHNITZER CONCERT HALL—Indigo Girls, Oregon Symphony, 7:30 pm, $25-95, all ages ARTICHOKE MUSIC—Friday Night Coffeehouse, $5, all ages ASH STREET SALOON—American Me, Betrayed by Weakness, I Reckon, Fear the Slaughter, 9 pm, $6 ★ BACKSPACE—Jeffrey Lewis & The Junkyard, Felsen, New Mexican Revolution, 9 pm, $10, all ages ★ BERBATI—Franz Nicolay, All the Apparatus, 9:30 pm, $7 BIDDY MCGRAW’S—Lynn Conover, 6 pm, all ages; Silverhawk, 9:30 pm BLUE DIAMOND—Lisa Mann & Her Really Good Band, 9 pm BLUE MONK—Northbound Rain, 9 pm BRANX—Turquoise Jeep, Illaj, Stewart Villain, Gang $ign$, 8 pm, $13, all ages BRASSERIE MONTMARTRE—Boy & Bean, 8 pm BUFFALO GAP—The Sale, 9 pm, free ★ BURGERVILLE—The No Tomorrow Boys, Thanks, Fringe Class, 6:30 pm, free, all ages CAMELLIA LOUNGE—Circle 3 Trio, 9 pm, $6 CANVAS ART BAR—Open Mic: Steve Huber, 7 pm, free, all ages COLONIAL HEIGHTS PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH— Crazy Jane Collaborates: Cascadia Composers, 7:30 pm, $5-20 CRYSTAL BALLROOM—The Devil Makes Three, Johnny Fritz Corndog, 9 pm, $20-23, all ages DANTE’S—Mbrascatu, Sad Little Man, 9 pm, free DOUG FIR—Donna the Buffalo, Brothers Comatose, 9 pm, $15-17 DUFF’S GARAGE—The Hamdogs, 6 pm, $2; Jon Koonce, 9 pm EAST BURN—Closely Watched Trains, 10 pm, free ★ EAST END—Queued Up, Mister Loveless, A Happy Death, 9 pm EDGEFIELD—Carl Solomon, 7 pm, free ELLA STREET SOCIAL CLUB—Emaculent, X-Kid, Willie Joe, Unique, Rose City Miss Chief, Barstars, Angelique, 9 pm, $5 FIRKIN TAVERN—Drunk on Pines, The Betwixties, Ryan Vapes, 8 pm, free FORD FOOD & DRINK—Lorna Miller, Walter Cryderman, 5 pm, free, all ages; Strange Language, 8 pm, free, all ages GOODFOOT—DJ Aquaman’s Soul Stew, 9 pm HALIBUT’S—Franco Paletta & the Stingers, 8 pm, free HAWTHORNE THEATRE—Miss May I, The Ghost Inside, Like Moths to Flames, The Amity Affliction, Glass Cloud, 6:30 pm, $17-20, all ages ISLAND MANA WINES—David & Goliath, 4 pm; Joe Marquand, 4:30 pm IVORIES—Chuck Israel’s Orchestra, 8 pm, $10 JADE LOUNGE—Aaron Zimmer, Renee Muzquiz, Krista Herring, Kate Turner, 6 pm JIMMY MAK’S—Brian Copeland Band, Jake Oken-Berg, The Beautiful Train Wrecks, 8 pm, $10 KELLY’S OLYMPIAN—Mount Mazama, The Subterranean Howl, 9 pm, $5 KENTON CLUB—Banh Me, Valkyrie Rodeo, Papaye, Moodring, 9 pm, free THE KNOW—Rarefaction, Shadow House, Splintered in Her Head, 8 pm LANDMARK SALOON—WC Beck, 6 pm; Get Rhythm, 9 pm LAURELTHIRST PUBLIC HOUSE—Woodbrain, 6 pm; Oreganic, Laura Ivancie, 9:30 pm MACADAM’S BAR & GRILL—Cody Weathers & The Men Your Mama Warned You About, 9 pm, free MISSISSIPPI PIZZA PUB—Level 2, 6 pm; Patina, 9 pm ★ MISSISSIPPI STUDIOS—Thrill Jockey Records 20th Anniversary Show: Trans Am, Liturgy, Eternal Tapestry, Barn Owl, Mike Scheidt, Golden Retriever, Jason Urick, 7:30 pm, $12 MOCK CREST TAVERN—Suburban Slim, 9 pm MT. TABOR THEATER—Stuart Davis, Kelsey Lindstrom, 7:30 pm, $10

MUDDY RUDDER—Sportin’ Lifers, 8 pm MUSIC MILLENNIUM—Felsen, 6 pm, free, all ages NEL CENTRO—Mike Pardew, 9:30 pm THE PRESS CLUB—SuS Quartet, 8 pm RECORD ROOM—Bath Party, Lunge, Young Dad, 8:30 pm, $3-5 RED ROOM—Thistle-Stalk, Dear Assassin, A Killing Dove, Onyx Guild, 9 pm, $5 ★ ROSELAND—GWAR, Devildriver, Cancer Bats, Legacy of Disorder, 7:30 pm, $20-23, all ages ★ THE SECRET SOCIETY—Pete Krebs & His Portland Playboys, 6 pm, all ages; Blue Cranes, Jessica Lurie Ensemble, 9 pm, $10 SHAKER AND VINE—Faerabella, Jude Contreras, 8 pm, $5 SLABTOWN—The Bloodtypes, Le Shat Noir, Lucky Tigers, 9 pm SOMEDAY LOUNGE—The Slants, The Suicide Notes, Oh Darling, 9 pm, $7 ★ STAR THEATER—Mark Eitzel, Peter Buck, 9 pm, $12 THE TARDIS ROOM—Sewer Sugar, Gay Ghost, 9 pm THIRSTY LION—Ants in the Kitchen, 9:30 pm TONIC LOUNGE—Exotic Club, We Are Like the Spider, Generations, 9 pm TONY STARLIGHT’S—Signatures, 8 pm, $15 TWILIGHT CAFE & BAR—Hepsi, Violation, 9 pm, $5 VIE DE BOHEME—Tim Snider, Max Ribner, 8:30 pm THE WAYPOST—Mikah Sykes, John Houx, Felix Hatfield, 8 pm ★ WHITE EAGLE—The Reverb Brothers, 5:30 pm, free, all ages; Mike Coykendall, The Sumner Brothers, Widower, 9:30 pm, $8 WILF’S—Mark Elf, Dick Berk, Dave Captein, 7:30 pm WONDER BALLROOM—EOTO, 8 pm, $16-20, all ages

SATURDAY 11/10 ALADDIN THEATER—Tyler Ward, 7:30 pm, $15-17 ★ ALBERTA ROSE THEATRE—Siren Nation Festival: Jolie Holland, Edna Vasquez, Like a Villain, 9 pm, $15 AL’S DEN—Mishka Shubaly, 7 pm, free ANDINA—Toshi Onizuka, 8 pm ARTICHOKE MUSIC—Sky in the Road, 8 pm, $15 ASH STREET SALOON—Sugar Tits, Treat Me Right, TLS Journey, 9:30 pm, $8 ★ BACKSPACE—The Glorious First of June, Ten Million Lights, Sundaze, 9 pm, $5 BIDDY MCGRAW’S—Muriel Stanton, 6 pm; Supervisor, 9:30 pm BLUE DIAMOND—Melanie Roy, 9 pm BLUE MONK—Midnight Serenaders, 9 pm BRANX—Iwrestledabearonce, Oceano, Vanna, Within the Ruin, The Plot in You, Surrounded by Monsters, 8 pm, $14, all ages BRASSERIE MONTMARTRE—Martin Zarzar, 8 pm BUFFALO GAP—Ras Jammie & the Splifftones, 9 pm, free CAMELLIA LOUNGE—Gaea Schell Trio, 8 pm, $10 ★ CLUB 21—Drunk Dad, Red Liquid, Diesto, 10 pm, free COMMUNITY MUSIC CENTER—Ken Beare, Maria Choban, 8 pm, free ★ DANTE’S—Two Cow Garage, Truckstop Darlin’, The Copyrights, I Can Lick Any Sonofabitch In The House, 9 pm, $10 ★ DOUG FIR—AC Newman, Harriet, 9 pm, $15 DUFF’S GARAGE—Surf Guitar Night: Banzai Surf, The Apollo 4, Susan & the Surftones, The Verbtones, 9 pm EDGEFIELD—Matt Meighan, Anna Hoone, 7 pm, free ELLA STREET SOCIAL CLUB—My Father’s Pocket Watch, Walkfast, Fontaine Classic, Basketball Jones, 9 pm, $5 EVANS AUDITORIUM, LEWIS & CLARK COLLEGE— Venerable Showers of Beauty Gamelan, Aloysius Suwardi, 7:30 pm, $5-15 FORD FOOD & DRINK—Camille Bloom, 7 pm, all ages GOODFOOT—New Monsoon, 9 pm, $10 HALIBUT’S—Kevin Selfe, 8 pm, free HAWTHORNE THEATRE—Prepare for Impact, Tides, Apollo, Hell’s Parish, Assyria, 7 pm, $8, all ages HAWTHORNE THEATRE LOUNGE—Mosby, 6 pm, free ★ HOLOCENE—Atlas: DJ Anjali, E3, The Incredible Kid, 9 pm IVORIES—David Friesen Trio, 8 pm, $10 JADE LOUNGE—Ama Bently, Claire Barnes, Leila Chicko, Annie Vergnetti, 6 pm JIMMY MAK’S—Michael Allen Harrison’s Superband, 8 pm, $10 ★ KELLY’S OLYMPIAN—Adventure Galley, Ninja Turtle Ninja Tiger, Tiger House, 9 pm, $5 ★ KENTON CLUB—TORTL, Bison Bison, 9 pm, free ★ THE KNOW—O Inimigo, Chemicals, Mass Exit, Rad Habits, 8 pm, $6 LANDMARK SALOON—Can’t Hardly Playboys, 9 pm LAURELTHIRST PUBLIC HOUSE—Tree Frogs, 6 pm; Cats Under the Stars, 9:30 pm MISSISSIPPI PIZZA PUB—Lorna Miller, 4 pm, all ages; Boa Saida, Ginkgo Murphy, 6 pm; z’Bumba, 9:30 pm, $7 MISSISSIPPI STUDIOS—MRS., DJ Beyondadoubt, 10 pm, $5 MOCK CREST TAVERN—The New Iberians, 9 pm ★ MONTGOMERY PARK—Reich-analia: Third Angle, 7:30 pm, $10-30 MT. TABOR THEATER—Dementia, 10 pm, free MUDDY RUDDER—Alan Hagar, 8 pm NEL CENTRO—Mike Pardew, Dave Captein, Randy Rollofson, 9:30 pm

November 7, 2012 Portland Mercury 25

The Mercury Music Blog

News.

MP3s. sNark.

Now Playing at endhits.portlandmercury.com

26 Portland Mercury November 7, 2012

Music

Live Music

LISTINGS

PONDEROSA LOUNGE (AT JUBITZ)—Lock Stock & Barrel, 9 pm, $2-5 THE PRESS CLUB—Yiddish Republik, 8:30 pm ★ RECORD ROOM—The Chair Project, Aerial Ruin, Vibrato, 8:30 pm, $3-5 RED & BLACK CAFE—Oliver Franklin, Aaron J. Shay, 7 pm RED ROOM—Kong at the Gates, Burning Monk, Article 13, Tentacle Burn, 7 pm RINGLER’S PUB—Jonah Luke, 3 pm, free ★ ROTTURE—Psychic TV, DBC, King Dude, Vice Device, 9 pm, $18-20 ★ THE SECRET SOCIETY—Everything’s Jake, 6 pm, all ages; The Tezeta Band, 9 pm, $7 SHAKER AND VINE—Finn Dixie, 8 pm, $5 ★ SLABTOWN—The Cry, Guantanamo Baywatch, Pataha Hiss, Youthbitch, 9 pm ★ SOMEDAY LOUNGE—New Cassettes, Apollo Run, The Lower 48, 9 pm, $8 STAR THEATER—Ben Sollee, 7 pm, $12; Project Neurotica, 10 pm, $10 THE TARDIS ROOM—San Cha, Tyler Holmes, Leafeater, Graham Sound, Dusty Santamaria’s Singing Knives, 8 pm THIRSTY LION—Boys Next Door, 9:30 pm TIGER BAR—Sonicles, Hair Assault, Dain Ryan, 9 pm, $6 ★ TONIC LOUNGE—Pierced Arrows, White Fang, K-Tel ’79, 9:30 pm TONY STARLIGHT’S—The Tony Starlight Show: Tony Starlight, 8 pm, $15 TWILIGHT CAFE & BAR—Town & The Writ, Chronicles of Bad Butch, Alex’s Hand, 9 pm, $3 VIE DE BOHEME—The Sultans of Slide, 9 pm WHITE EAGLE—The Student Loan, 4:30 pm, free, all ages; Josh Cole Band, Stumbleweed, 9:30 pm, $8 WILF’S—Mark Elf, Dick Berk, Dave Captein, 7:30 pm WONDER BALLROOM—Water Tower, Fruition, Sassparrilla, 8 pm, $10-12

SUNDAY 11/11 ★ ALBERTA ROSE THEATRE—Siren Nation Festival: Carina Round, Rosi Golan, 8 pm, $12-15 AL’S DEN—Garcia Birthday Band, 7 pm, free ANDINA—Matices, 6 pm; Danny Romero, 7 pm AUGUSTANA LUTHERAN CHURCH—Augustana Jazz Quartet, 6 pm, free, all ages BACKSPACE—Page of Cups, Jesse Layne, 5 pm, $3-10, all ages BIDDY MCGRAW’S—Felim Egan, 8 pm BLUE MONK—Trio Subtonic, 8 pm CLYDE’S PRIME RIB—Ron Steen Jazz Jam, 8:30 pm, free CORKSCREW WINE BAR—Catarina New, 6 pm ★ CRYSTAL BALLROOM—Brandi Carlile, Blitzen Trapper, 8 pm, $46, all ages DANTE’S—Sinferno Cabaret, 11 pm ★ DOUG FIR—Siren Nation: Rebecca Gates, The Mynabirds, Yenta, 9 pm, $15 EAGLES LODGE—Cirijaye, Railway, 5 pm EAT: AN OYSTER BAR—Reggie Houston’s Box of Chocolates, 11 am EDGEFIELD—The Northstar Session, 5 pm, free ELLA STREET SOCIAL CLUB—The Shortsleeves, Mechlo, Andreas, 9 pm, $5 FIRKIN TAVERN—Open Mic, 8 pm, free FORD FOOD & DRINK—Tim Roth, noon, free, all ages ★ HAWTHORNE THEATRE—Municipal Waste, Napalm Death, Exhumed, Attitude Adjustment, Wehrmacht, 7 pm, $16-18, all ages IVORIES—Weber Iago, David Valdez, 7 pm, $8 JADE LOUNGE—Vanessa Rogers, 7 pm JIMMY MAK’S—Love for Linda: Patrick Lamb, 9 pm, $25, all ages KELLS—Irish Session, 6 pm; Pat Buckley, 9 pm KENTON CLUB—Morning Glory, 9 pm, free THE KNOW—Synthetic ID, Sick Rats, Di Di Mau, Lunge, 8 pm LAURELTHIRST PUBLIC HOUSE—Dan Haley, Tim Acott, 9:30 pm, free LV’S—Blues, Brews & BBQ, 6 pm MIGRATION BREWING—Whistlepig, 7 pm MISSISSIPPI PIZZA PUB—Succotash, 6 pm; Sparkle Nation, 9 pm ★ MISSISSIPPI STUDIOS—Generationals, Races, 9 pm, $10 ★ MOON & SIXPENCE—Foghorn Stringband, free MUDDY RUDDER—Irish Music, 4 pm MUSIC MILLENNIUM—Ty Curtis Band, 3 pm, free, all ages; Sutton Sorensen, 5 pm, free, all ages ★ RECORD ROOM—Vacation, Still Caves, Rat Party, 8 pm, $5 ROCK BOTTOM BREWERY—Dojo Toolkit, 9 pm

★ RONTOMS—Genders, The Black Apples, Woodwinds, 9 pm, free ★ ROSE GARDEN—Leonard Cohen, 8 pm, $39.50-250, all ages ★ ROTTURE—Loss, Worm Ouroboros, Disemballerina, Ephemeros, 9 pm, $10 ★ THE SECRET SOCIETY—StationToStation: Holcombe Waller, 7:30 pm, $12 SLABTOWN—Skipp Coon, DJ Mister Nick, Gangster Computer God, 9 pm, $5 THE SPARE ROOM—Angel Bouchet Band, 8 pm, free ★ VALENTINE’S—Plankton Wat, Ensemble Economique, Warm Climate, 9 pm VIE DE BOHEME—Harmonica Party: Arthur Moore, 6 pm WAVERLY HEIGHTS CONGREGATIONAL CHURCH— The Portland Sacred Harp, 2 pm, free WHITE EAGLE—Daniel Rodriguez, The Sale, 7 pm, $10

MONDAY 11/12 AL’S DEN—Garcia Birthday Band, 7 pm, free ANDINA—Pete Krebs, 7 pm ★ BACKSPACE—Andrew Jackson Jihad, Future of the Left, Jeff Rosenstock, 7:30 pm, $13, all ages BLUE DIAMOND—Tom Grant, 9 pm ★ BUNK BAR—Gentlemen Jesse & His Men, Youthbitch, Vacation, 9:30 pm, $8 DANTE’S—Karaoke from Hell, 10 pm ★ DOUG FIR—Jon Spencer Blues Explosion, Quasi, 9 pm, $15-18 EDGEFIELD—Skip vonKuske, 7 pm, free GOODFOOT—Sonic Forum Open Mic, 8 pm, $1 HAWTHORNE THEATRE—Epica, Alestorm, Insomnium, System Divide, Destiny Potato, Reficul, 6 pm, $20-25, all ages ★ HOLOCENE—Octopus Project, Magic Mouth, Lavender Mirror, 8:30 pm, $10-12 ISLAND MANA WINES—David & Goliath, 4 pm JADE LOUNGE—Salon De Musique: Jaime Leopold, 7 pm JIMMY MAK’S—Bright Lights Conversation, 6 pm, free; Dan Balmer, 8 pm, free KATIE O’BRIEN’S—Mumfords, The Depaysement, No More Parachutes, 9 pm, free KELLS—Pat Buckley, 9 pm THE KNOW—Blue Light Curtain, Appendixes, Fang Moon, 8 pm LAURELTHIRST PUBLIC HOUSE—Portland Country Underground, 6 pm, free; Kung Pao Chickens, 9 pm, free MISSION THEATER—William Topley, 8 pm, $22-25 MISSISSIPPI PIZZA PUB—Mr. Ben, 5 pm, all ages MISSISSIPPI STUDIOS—Roomrunner, The Tomorrow People, Summer Cannibals, 9 pm, $6-8 MUDDY RUDDER—Lloyd Jones, 8 pm MUSIC MILLENNIUM—The Northstar Session, 6 pm, free, all ages PUB AT THE END OF THE UNIVERSE—Open Mic, 8 pm, free QUIMBY’S AT 19TH—Soul Mates, 7 pm ROCK BOTTOM BREWERY—Mt. Air Studios, 10 pm TIGER BAR—AC Lov Ring, 9 pm WHITE EAGLE—The Infinity of it All, 8:30 pm, free

TUESDAY 11/13 ALADDIN THEATER—Robert Cray, 8 pm, $40-45 ★ ALBERTA ROSE THEATRE—Joy Kills Sorrow, Fish & Bird, 8 pm, $10-12 AL’S DEN—Garcia Birthday Band, 7 pm, free ANDINA—JB Butler, 7 pm ASH STREET SALOON—Dogs of August, Artimus Treefrog, 9:15 pm, $4 BACKSPACE—Desert of Hiatus, Wrangel-St. Elias, Trance Farmers, 9 pm, $5, all ages BLUE DIAMOND—The 4 of Diamonds, 9 pm BLUE MONK—Pagan Jug Band, 6:30 pm, free ★ BUNK BAR—Hustle & Drone, Talkative, 9 pm, $3 ★ CLUB 21—Organs, Youthbitch, Grrrl Friend, 10 pm, free DUFF’S GARAGE—Trio Bravo, 6 pm, $2; Dover Weinberg Quartet, 9 pm, $2 EDGEFIELD—Caleb Klauder, Reeb Willms, 7 pm, free THE ELIXIR LAB—Johnny D’s Community Jam, 7 pm FIRKIN TAVERN—Tim Karplus Band, Steph Infection & the Heebie Jeebies, 8 pm, free GOODFOOT—Radula, 9 pm, free; Scott Pemberton Trio, 9 pm, free HAWTHORNE THEATRE—Streetlight Manifesto, Hostage Calm, Lionize, 7 pm, $17.50-20, all ages HAWTHORNE THEATRE LOUNGE—That Much Further West Radio, 4 pm, free THE HUTCH—Open Mic, 8 pm, free IVORIES—Jazz Jam: Carey Campbell, Hank Hirsh Trio, 7:30 pm JADE LOUNGE—Songbird Showcase: Cynthia O’Brien, 7 pm JIMMY MAK’S—The Mario Sandoval Vibraphone Quartet, 6:30 pm, $3 KELLS—Pat Buckley, 9 pm KENTON CLUB—When the Broken Bow, 9 pm, free LANDMARK SALOON—Sagebrush Sisters, 7 pm ★ LAURELTHIRST PUBLIC HOUSE—Jackstraw, 6 pm, free

November 7, 2012 Portland Mercury 27

28 Portland Mercury November 7, 2012

Music

LV’S—Ron Steen’s Jazz Jam, 8:30 pm MISSISSIPPI PIZZA PUB—Supadupa Marimba Brothers, 6 pm ★ MISSISSIPPI STUDIOS—Bahamas, The World Radiant, 9 pm, $12 MT. TABOR THEATER—Open Mic Night: Simon Tucker, 8 pm, free THE OLD CHURCH—Octetlandia: 45th Parallel, 7:30 pm, all ages QUIMBY’S AT 19TH—Tom Grant, 8:30 pm, free ROCK BOTTOM BREWERY—Brothers ’n’ Laws, 9 pm SHAKER AND VINE—Arthur Moore’s Harmonica Party, 8 pm SLIM’S—Open Mic, 9 pm, free TASTE ON 23RD—Brandstson Duo, 6:30 pm, free THIRSTY LION—Eric John Kaiser, 9 pm TONY STARLIGHT’S—Bo Ayars, 6 pm, free; Ayars Vocal Showcase, 7:30 pm, $7 TWILIGHT CAFE & BAR—Open Mic Night: The Roaming, 8 pm VINO VIXENS—Arthur Moore’s Harmonica Party, 6 pm WHITE EAGLE—The Vespers, King Clifton, 8:30 pm, $8 ★ WONDER BALLROOM—Japandroids, Bleached, 7:30 pm, $16, all ages

DJ LISTINGS

WEDNESDAY 11/7

BEECH ST. PARLOR—DJ vs. Nature CC SLAUGHTERS—Trick: DJ Robb, 9 pm, free CRUZROOM—Do You Remember Rock & Roll Radio: Pat Kearns, Mark Brachmann THE EMBERS AVENUE—Gothic Industrial: DJ Jens, 9 pm FIRKIN TAVERN—VJ Norto, 9 pm GROUND KONTROL—TRONix: Bryan Zentz, 10 pm JONES—Spin Sugar: Doc Adam, 10 pm, $5 LADD’S INN—DJ Kutthroat, 9:30 pm, free THE LOVECRAFT—DJ Nealie Neal, DJ Unruly, 9 pm MOLOKO PLUS—King Tim 33.3, Discus Noir, 10 pm, free THE REFECTORY—Wednesday Eastside Karaoke: KJ RC, 8 pm SAUCEBOX—DJ Nealie Neal TIGA—DJ Bill Portland TIGER BAR—Juicy Wednesdays: DJ Detroit Diezel, 9 pm, $2 TUBE—No Counts: Chazz Madrigal, 10 pm THE WHISKEY BAR—Whiskey Wednesdays: American Girls, 10 pm, free

THURSDAY 11/8 BEECH ST. PARLOR—DJ Quincy Hoist BERBATI—Deff Ro, 9:30 pm CC SLAUGHTERS—Hiphop Heaven: DJ Alex Hollywood, 9 pm, free CLUB 21—Greyskull CROWN ROOM—Counter Culture, 10 pm, free THE EMBERS AVENUE—Request Night: DJ Jens FEZ—Shadowplay: DJ Horrid, DJ Ghoulunatic, DJ Paradox, 9 pm, free JONES—New Jack Swing: Doc Adam, 10 pm, $5 LUCKY DEVIL—DJ Panty Droppa, free MOLOKO PLUS—King Tim 33.3, Discus Noir, 10 pm, free NICK’S FAMOUS CONEY ISLAND—Eye Candy: VJ Norto, The Phantom Hillbilly, 9 pm, free ★ ROTTURE—I’ve Got a Hole in my Soul: DJ Beyondadoubt, 9 pm, $5 SANTA FE TAQUERIA—Salsa Social SOS: DJ Armando, 9 pm SAUCEBOX—Evan Alexander SOMEDAY LOUNGE—Happy Hour: Mr. Romo, DJ Michael Grimes, 4 pm TIGA—DJ Old Frontier TRADER VIC’S—DJ Drew Groove, 6 pm TUBE—Big Trouble in Little Chinatown: DJ Zimmie, Dev From Above, 7 pm VAULT—Jams: DJ 60/40 WORKSHOP PUB—Phonographix Video DJs, 9 pm

FRIDAY 11/9 BEECH ST. PARLOR—DJ Avant to Party BERBATI—Digital Stimulation, 9:30 pm BLITZ 21—DJ Sovern-T, 9 pm, free CC SLAUGHTERS—Filthy Fridays: DJ Robb, 9 pm, free ★ DEVILS POINT—DJ Kenoy, 9 pm, free ★ EAGLES LODGE—In the Cooky Jar: DJ Cooky Parker, 9 pm ELEMENT—Chris Alice, 9 pm THE EMBERS AVENUE—On the Avenue: DJ Jens, 9 pm FOGGY NOTION—Bent: Roy G Biv, Mr. Charming, 9 pm, $5 GOLD DUST MERIDIAN—DJ Cecilia, 10 pm, free GROOVE SUITE—Cock Block: Mena, Mercedes, Melody Fisher, Miss Vixen, DJ Coast2Coast, 10 pm, $5

GROUND KONTROL—Super Cardigan Brothers, 9 pm, $2 ★ HAWTHORNE THEATRE LOUNGE—DJ Lorax, DJ Bob Ham, 6 pm, free HOLOCENE—KM Fizzy, 5 pm, free JONES—Back to the Future Fridays: DJ Zimmie, 8 pm, $5 LOLA’S ROOM—’80s Video Dance Attack: VJ Kittyrox, 8 pm, $6 LUCKY DEVIL—DJ Joe, free MATADOR—Infamous: DJ Rattooth, DJ Makeout, 10 pm, free MOTHERS VELVET LOUNGE CAFE—Mr. Mumu ★ ROTTURE—Live and Direct: Rev Shines, Slimkid3, DJ Nature, 9 pm, $5 STAR BAR—Blank Fridays: DJ Ikon, 10 pm, free TIGA—DJ Coloured Glass TRIPLE NICKEL—DJ Stockholmz, 9:30 pm TUBE—Heavy Hitters: Ante Up, 10 pm

SATURDAY 11/10 AURA—Twice as Nice: DJ TJ, A Train, Tandem, 10 pm, $10 BEECH ST. PARLOR—Mudslide McBride BERBATI—DJ Mello Cee, 9:30 pm CC SLAUGHTERS—House of Hollywood: DJ Alex Hollywood, 9 pm, free CROWN ROOM—Up & Up: DJ Nature, 9 pm, $5 CRUZROOM—Vnylogy DJs DEVILS POINT—DJ Brooks, 9 pm, free EAST BURN—Symbolism, 10 pm, free THE EMBERS AVENUE—Portland Tonight: DJ Jens, 9 pm FEZ—Twice as Nice: DJ TJ, A Train, Tandem, 10 pm, $10 GOLD DUST MERIDIAN—Clap Trap: DJ Gregarious, DJ Disorder, 10 pm, free GREELEY AVE. BAR AND GRILL—Eye Candy: VJ Norto, The Phantom Hillbilly, 9 pm, free GROOVE SUITE—After Dark GROUND KONTROL—DJ Destructo, DJ Chip, 9 pm, $2 JONES—’80s & ’90s Dance Music, 10 pm, $5 THE LOVECRAFT—Music for Mannequins: Tom Jones, Erica Jones, 10 pm LOW BROW LOUNGE—DJ Saltfeend, Samizdat, MonkeyTek, 10 pm LUCKY DEVIL—DJ Kenoy, free MOLOKO PLUS—King Tim 33.3, Discus Noir, 10 pm, free MOTHERS VELVET LOUNGE CAFE—Mr. Mumu TIGA—DJ Slim Chances TRIPLE NICKEL—DJ Stockholmz, 9:30 pm TUBE—DJ Stray, 10 pm THE WHISKEY BAR—Roger Shah, DJ Zoxy, DJ Eddie, DJ Timmy, DJ Web, Gotek, DJ Licious, 9 pm

SUNDAY 11/11 AALTO LOUNGE—Whiskey Bitters, 9 pm, free ★ BEULAHLAND—The Original Eye Candy Video Night: VJ Norto, The Phantom Hillbilly, 9 pm, free CC SLAUGHTERS—Superstar Divas, DJ Robb, 8 pm, free CRUSH—DJ Mikey, 10 am-2 pm DEVILS POINT—Stripparaoke: KJ Zero, 9 pm, free THE EMBERS AVENUE—Noches Latinas: DJ Marco, 9 pm GOLD DUST MERIDIAN—DJ Mike-a-nay, 10 pm, free THE LOVECRAFT—DJ Hellion, 10 pm LUCKY DEVIL—Ladies Night: DJ Mani, free

MONDAY 11/12 BERBATI—Henry Dark, 9:30 pm BLUE MONK—Deep Cuts, 8 pm CLUB 21—Witch Throne GROUND KONTROL—Service Industrial: DJ Tibin, 9 pm KELLY’S OLYMPIAN—Eye Candy: VJ Norto, Phantom Hillbilly, 8 pm, free MATADOR—I Don’t Like Mondays: DJ Rhienna, DJF, 10 pm, free O’MALLEY’S SALOON & GRILL—Heavy Metal Monday: Bozyk, 9 pm STAR BAR—Metal Mondays: DJ Nefarious, 10 pm, free TIGA—Gentleman Matthew Yake TRADER VIC’S—DJ AM Gold, 6 pm

503.288.3895 3939 N. Mississippi info@mississippistudios.com

8pm doors/ 9pm show BarBar all ages until 9pm 21+ unless otherwise noted

Siren Nation Festival Presents: Radical live performances from inventive & liberated performers

JD SAMSON & MEN EMA LA SERA

Thu, Nov 8

$15 Adv

TRANS AM

LITURGY ETERNAL TAPESTRY BARN OWL · MIKE SCHEIDT GOLDEN RETRIEVER · JASON URICK

Fri, Nov 9 7pm Doors/7:30pm Show $12 Adv New Orleans indie band of classic pop cuts and new wave rhythms

GENERATIONALS

GATSBY ROARING 20’s

w/DJ BEYONDA

Sat, Nov 10 10pm Doors/10pm Show $5 DoS Noise-pop bliss with a nod to the 90s

ROOMRUNNER THE TOMORROW PEOPLE SUMMER CANNIBALS

Mon, Nov 12

$6 Adv

TWO NIGHTS

MAST Presents: Traditional ear-ripping barn turners from notable artists of the Stringcheese Incident and Leftover Salmon

RACES Sun, Nov 11

$10 Adv

Juno nominated Toronto artist making atmospheric and arresting folk

BAHAMAS THE WORLD RADIANT Tue, Nov 13

$12 Adv

101.9 KINK.FM Presents: Founding member of The Bangles brings 60s era folk to the stage with her latest solo album

SUSANNA EMMITT-NERSHI BAND HOFFS HEAD FOR THE HILLS 2 DAY PASSES AVAILABLE FOR $30 (limited to 100) $20 Adv

Thu, Nov 15 - and - Fri, Nov 16 Red Bull Music Academy Presents The Endless Summer Tour: West Coast dance powerhouses join forces to make sure you feel the heat

MICHELE VAN KLEEF Sat, Nov 17

Sun, Nov 18

$8 Adv

The annual championship of quizzy masters.

Testicide XV

$22 Adv

Multi-instrumentalist whose songs make for otherworldly and expansive pop

DELICATE

CLASSIXX JEROME LOL COSMIC KIDS

STEVE

DANA BUOY

Mon, Nov 19

(OF AKRON FAMILY)

$12 Adv

Soul Food: A Benefit Concert for the Oregon Food Bank

SOUL

VACCINATION

TUESDAY 11/13 BEECH ST. PARLOR—Jason Urick CC SLAUGHTERS—DJ Robb, 9 pm, free CROWN ROOM—See You Next Tuesday: Kellan, DJ Avery, 9 pm, free ★ DEVILS POINT—DJ Kenoy, 9 pm, free THE EMBERS AVENUE—Recycle: DJ Tibin, 9 pm, free GROUND KONTROL—Rock Band Tuesdays: MC T. Wrecks, 9 pm, free THE LOVECRAFT—Death Club: DJ Entropy, 10 pm MATADOR—DJ Donny Don’t, 10 pm, free SOMEDAY LOUNGE—Lift: Phidelity, Joyride, Bassbin Brothers, 9 pm, $7 ★ SWIFT LOUNGE—Boogie Tuesday: Maxx Bass, Gwizski, Mikie Lixx TUBE—Tubesday, 10 pm

20th Anniversary

Tue, Nov 20 7pmDoors/7pmShow Free Show!

Coming Soon...

11/23: TONY FURTADO BAND 11/24: THE LOVE LOUNGERS 11/25: BLOOD BEACH 11/27: PETER AMES CARLIN 11/28: LEE DEWYZE 11/29: AND AND AND 11/30: CALIFONE 12/1: BATTLEME / MY GOODNESS 12/2: LAWRENCE ARABIA

Wed, Nov 21 6:30pmDoors/7pmShow $15 Adv

12/3: CINEBITCH 12/5: MOONDOGGIES 12/6: SCOTT LAW REUNION BAND 12/7: THE CHARLIE HUNTER & SCOTT AMENDOLA DUO 12/8: SARA WATKINS (EARLY) 12/8: MRS (LATE) 12/9: PDX/RX: SHY GIRLS 12/11: LOST BAYOU RAMBLERS 12/12: PINEHURST KIDS

12/13: THE DIMES 12/14: DAVID BAZAN BAND 12/15: COREY SMITH 12/16: EL VEZ MEX-MAS 12/20: FANNIE MAE’S QUEER QUISTMAS 12/21: THE DRUTHERS 12/22: TANGO ALPHA TANGO 12/27: PETUNIA AND THE VIPERS 12/28: JERRY JOSEPH & THE JACKMORMONS

mississippistudios.com November 7, 2012 Portland Mercury 29

skeleton key tattoo 1729 se hawthorne blvd.

503-233-4292

safe, sterile, friendly custom tattoos walk-ins and by appointment

Why am I alive?

LOW-COST BANKRUPTCY FREE CONSULTATION

KELLY K. BROWN BANKRUPTCY ATTORNEY

 



PRESENTS: THE PENDLETON® FASHION SHOW, THURSDAY 11/15 @ DIG A PONY / STARTS AT 7:30 FASHION SHOW AND CHARITY RAFFLES START AT 8PM* FREE PENDLETON® GIFT TO FIRST 100 THROUGH THE DOOR COME DRESSED IN YOUR FAVORITE PENDLETON® CLOTHING FOR YOUR CHANCE TO

WIN A PRIZE!

RAFFLE TICKETS AVAILABLE FOR PURCHASE @ COMMUNION 3556 SE HAWTHORNE BLVD. OR AT THE DOOR, DAY OF SHOW $2 EACH, 3 FOR $5

* PROCEEDS GO TO ‘TOYS FOR TOTS’

CONTENT NOV.11.2012 5-10pm 1022 SW STARK ST. TICKETS AT ACE HOTEL: $15 ADVANCE / $20 DOOR Julia Barbee Bridge & Burn Btwn Wind & Water Tanner Goods Jayme Hansen, Kate Fenker, Hans Lindauer Sara Bergman Reif Brady Lange

Sword + Fern Portland Garment Factory LiFT Bwana Spoons PINO Joshua Buck/Chicago Harper/Studio SKB Made on the Moon Draught Dry Goods The Portland Collection

presented by

ACEHOTEL.COM/CONTENT

30 Portland Mercury November 7, 2012

Honeyfox Vanport Outfitters Dawn Sharp Ruki Kate Towers Demimonde Poler The Good Flock Carly Mick

ThinkRenaissance.org

503·224·4124 www.kellybrown.com

Stop foreclosure and garnishment Evening and weekend appointments We are a debt relief agency. We help people file for bankruptcy under the Bankruptcy Code.

520 SW Yamhill · Suite 420 · Portland 97204

Gossip

News

Feature

Picks

Music

SMALL PRESS NEWS

Arts

Food

Fashion

Film

TV

Sex

Fun

Poetry Powerhouse

ArtChart OUR PICKS OF THE WEEK

Bad Blood Builds an Empire by Jacob Schraer various independent enterprises. Poor Claudia, size, that’s receptive to that. In a way, it’s a type of the poetry press that Swenhaugen founded and consumer-based activism.” runs with Marshall Walker Lee, would now hanJoining forces establishes them as a larger dle all chapbook production for Octopus Books, presence in Portland’s ever-changing literary Schomburg’s longtime imprint. Mains would take community. They begin by hosting one of their bigthe editorial reins of Octopus magazine, while the gest Bad Blood events to date on Tuesday, NoBad Blood series would continue under all of their vember 13, at ADX, featuring Eileen Myles, a New supervision for events, publicity, and community.

York-based career poet whose most recent book, “We thought it would be fun, and maybe Snowflake/Different Streets was released a little tongue in cheek, to buy each last spring by Seattle’s Wave Books. other out. Because this is so not a Two authors from Octopus Books will moneymaking thing. It’s almost the be introducing new releases: Patriantithesis of that because there’s cia Lockwood’s Balloon Pop OutADX, 417 SE 11th, no money involved,” said Schomlaw Black and Ben Mirov with Hider Tues Nov 13, 8 pm, burg recently when I spoke with Roser. Rounding out the evening is badbloodpoetry.org the three of them. Recounting the Portland’s own Donald Dunbar, host path to creating this new entity, they of the If Not for Kidnap reading series, all agree it spawned from an already colwith another new release, Eyelid Lick, a lective sense of dedication and responsibility. dynamic and richly designed collection from “Everybody was already helping out in each in- Fence Books. These poets represent different dividual thing,” said Mains, who teaches at PCC. aesthetic styles, ranging from sparse to highly “In a funny way, consolidating them allows for a lot experimental. With a lineup featuring nationally less bureaucracy.” known names and established talents, Bad Blood It’s also Portland-specific. “There are more continues to reach further and organize some of people here that appreciate small things,” says the best reading in the country, for free, right here Mains. “This just happens to be a place, for its in Portland.

I

N SEPTEMBER, Bad Blood convened at ADX for its 13th reading. Two years into its existence, the poetry series had an established track record of popular events featuring poets from Portland and the country at large.

Bad Blood was launched by local writers Drew Swenhaugen, Zach Schomburg, and Joseph Mains. Longtime friends, Bad Blood brought them together professionally. That night at ADX, they announced a new endeavor: the merging of their

OPERA REVIEW

A Very Bad Man Portland Opera’s Don Giovanni by Fancy Lad Lannamann the New York City Opera’s 2009 staging of Don as Leporello, Don Giovanni’s long-suffering manservant, is the production’s unmistakable trump Giovanni works well.

Mozart could never be accused of gloomi- card, earning consistent laughs as the show’s ness, but the otherwise comic Don Giovanni much-needed conscience. Daniel Okulitch is contains a darker tone that indicates the hollow- strong in the title role as well, despite a preshow caveat from General Director Christoness of a life lived without restraint. The pher Mattaliano that Okulitch was unopera opens with the title character der the weather for Sunday’s mati“ravishing” Donna Anna—there’s a nee. I admit to getting Giovanni’s rapey undercurrent never made paramours mixed up at first, but fully explicit. Throughout, a wobPortland Opera at the all three—Donna Anna (Stefania bly line separates Giovanni’s Keller Auditorium, 222 SW Dovhan), Donna Elvira (Mary gentlemanly skills of seduction Clay, 241-1407, Thurs Nov 8 Dunleavy), and Zerlina (Sandra and his tendency to use physical & Sat Nov 10, $25 & up, Piques Eddy)—distinguish themforce to get into the pants of any portlandopera.org selves. From a musical standpoint, girl that catches his eye. It’s clear the production is very strong. that Mozart’s Don Giovanni is not At well over three hours, it’s also inthe Casanova-like loverman that leaps credibly long. The decision to stage every perto mind when most people hear the name Don Juan. Giovanni’s more than a libertine—he’s an former’s motions as very slow walking doesn’t amoral monster, a point hammered home when he help. The set suggests a stark municipal room, casually murders Donna Anna’s father, the Com- part courthouse and part church, dotted by a distracting clutter of chairs and capped by an mendatore, whose ghost returns later.

Mozart’s gymnastic music is, needless to unsubtle, light-up crucifix. The staging doesn’t do say, the highlight of this production, and it’s much to illuminate the story, which finds its best performed with precision, temper, and a sala- expression through the captivating performers ciousness to match the storyline. Jason Hardy and Mozart’s infallible music.

Don Giovanni

I

CORY WEAVER

NDICATED BY recent outreach programs that include affordable ticket prices and inviting local comics artists to dress rehearsals, Portland Opera’s chief goal is to make opera approachable—to strip away any historically stuffy connotations, while preserving opera’s crowd-pleasing abilities. To that end, their current production of

COMIC REVIEW

Cartoon Marbles Ellen Forney Takes the “Crazy” Out of “Crazy Artist” by Alison Hallett

I

F YOU’VE BROWSED the sex toys at Babeland or taken a recent walk through the streets of Seattle, odds are you’ve seen Ellen Forney’s work.

Over the course of 15 or so years, her brash, sexy comics have cropped up in venues both highbrow and low: she’s illustrated kinky personal ads for Seattle alt-weekly The Stranger, created banners for Seattle streets, and provided the art for Sherman Alexie’s great, National Book Award-winning The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian.

She teaches comics at Seattle’s Cornish College of the Arts, recently won a Genius Award from The Stranger, and is much-loved for a series of instructional how-to comics including “How to Smoke Pot and Stay Out of Jail” and “How to Fuck a Woman

with Your Hands.” Oh, and she does custom wed- as Forney struggles to figure out if once she’s no ding invitations. longer a crazy artist, she’ll still be an artist.

Her personal new graphic memoir MarTo write the book, she interviewed friends bles: Mania, Depression, Michelanand family members about their memogelo, and Me dives 15 years into ries; she also includes scans from the past, to the days when Forold journals, which clearly illusney was a stoner 30-year-old trate the night-and-day differrecently diagnosed with bipoence between Forney’s epilar disorder. With honesty and sodes of mania and depreshumor, Forney describes the sion. She meticulously docuchallenges of coming to terms ments the various medications

by Ellen Forney (Gotham Books) with her diagnosis: In addition and therapies she underwent— Reading at Powell’s City of to figuring out how to manage what worked, what didn’t, what Books, 1005 W Burnside, medications and treatment for meds gave her memory probMon Nov 12, 7:30 pm the disorder itself, Forney worried lems, what made her break out, and that being bipolar was somehow tied what killed her sex life. to her creativity, and that if she medicated “My intent wasn’t specifically to have writherself into normalcy, she might somehow lose ac- ing the book be a form of therapy, but it wound up cess to her own creative processes. Throughout being that,” Forney told me over the phone from Sethe book, there’s a persistent fascination with the attle. “It was like pulling out this enormous splinter connection between mental illness and creativity, and really cleaning that out. And then also I wanted

Marbles: Mania, Depression, Michelangelo, and Me

Comment on these stories at portlandmercury.com

TIMOTHY KARPINSKI

Bad Blood

THE DAY WE SAW THE SUN COME UP

TIMOTHY KARPINSKI & BROOKE WEEBER COMPOUND • 107 NW 5TH • THROUGH DEC 2

Sunshine—Essential local choreographer Tahni Holt presents an evening-length dance piece exploring narrative, audience expectation, and perpetual renewal. BodyVox, 1201 NW 17th, Fri Nov 9-Sun Nov 11, 8 pm, plus Sun Nov 11, 3 pm, $12-16, tahniholt.com Be Funny—A solid lineup of the usual local comedy suspects is headlined by Auggie Smith, performing his first PDX gig since abandoning us for Los Angeles last year.

Mississippi Pizza, 3552 N Mississippi, Thurs Nov 8, 9 pm, $5, 21+ Nikki McClure—An exhibit of new papercut works by Nikki McClure, made with single sheets of black paper, an X-Acto knife, and a willingness to tell stories of life, friendship, and community. Land, 3925 N Mississippi, opening Fri Nov 9, 6-9 pm, through Dec 2 The Onion Book of Known Knowledge— A reading from the Onion’s compendium of things people know, presented by editor Will Tracy. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside, Sat Nov 10, 2 pm, powells.com Christopher Kimball—The host of America’s Test Kitchen presents The Science of Good Cooking, a foolproof cookbook that allows readers to engage in some food science of their own. (By which we mean: Cook some damn dinner.) Powell’s Books at Cedar Hills Crossing, 3415 SW Cedar Hills, Beaverton, Mon Nov 12, 7 pm, powells.com

PORTLANDMERCURY.COM HAS A COMPLETE CALENDAR OF ARTS EVENTS

it to be very specifically and immediately useful to other people—that’s why there’s so many endnotes where people can see where things came from.”

It’s only a matter of time until someone puts together an anthology of addiction and mental illness as depicted in graphic novels: Nate Powell’s swirling fields of buggy black; Julia Wertz’s fed-up brain fleeing her body in disgust; Alison Bechdel’s endless sessions on the therapist’s couch. Marbles’ contribution might well be its wrenchingly effective snapshot of depression: one wordless page of simple, sequential black-and-white images depicting Forney, a lump in the bed, dragging her blanket to the living room to become a lump on the couch.

Her highs, though, are just as bad, and she’s frank in describing the damage she did to friendships in the grandiose throes of a manic episode.

“The idea of the crazy artist is that we’re passionate, up and down, throwing ourselves around… and that this outpouring of passion is where our art comes from,” Forney says of eventually learning to manage her disorder and her art. “When I was first diagnosed I had the idea that that was a part of being an artist. It’s different for everyone, really, but I guess the big answer for myself is that stability has been really good for me and my creativity.”

November 7, 2012 Portland Mercury 31

News

Feature

Picks

Music

Arts

Food

Film

TV

Sex

Fun

BOOK REVIEW

Sisterhood of the Traveling Rants

W

Sister Spit’s Vital New Anthology by Alison Hallett

HY SHOULD ONLY musicians get to go on tour? Since the mid ’90s, Michelle Tea’s traveling roadshow Sister Spit has packed poets, storytellers, and performance artists into a tour van, a touring brigade of queer-friendly, countercultural ambassadors crashing venues across the country and the world. Initially conceived as a way to harness the energy of San Francisco’s poetry scene in the early ’90s, Sister Spit has since featured such notables as Eileen Myles, Beth Lisick, Blake Nelson, Portland’s Nicole J. Georges, comic shot through with the and many, many more. crankiness of being vegan Sister Spit: Writing, Rants, on the road; and Tamara and Reminiscence from the Llosa-Sandor’s entry is a Road collects diaries, comedited by Michelle Tea ics, poems, and stories from Reading with Michelle Tea, Nicole J. dour reflection on that soggy Oregon logging town to the Sister Spit participants—some Georges, and more, Powell’s City south (“Living in Eugene is like tour specific, some not. Nelson’s of Books, 1005 W Burnside, dating a girl you’re slightly embartour diary captures an endearing Thurs Nov 8, 7:30 pm rassed by"). Taken together, it’s an disenchantment with the students at energetic, diverse collection in which wildthe colleges they’re visiting (“generally ly disparate styles and sensibilities all casually coexI’m finding college kids to be a bit more clueless ist—just like, one imagines, they do on the road. than expected”); Georges turns in a food-focused

Sister Spit: Writing, Rants, and Reminiscence from the Road

Arts Calendar

READINGS

7:30 pm, Sat-Sun 2 pm, Wed Nov 14, 7:30 pm and Wed Nov 21, 7:30 pm, through Nov 25, $21-40

WEDNESDAY 11/7

FALL OF THE BAND

POLINA OLSEN

A reading from Portland in the 1960s, about the decade in which Portland legitimately earned its reputation as a hippie wonderland. Annie Bloom’s Books, 7834 SW Capitol, 246-0053, 7 pm

THURSDAY 11/8

BEYOND JUDY BLUME Bitch Media hosts an interactive community forum on identity and sexuality in Young Adult literature. PSU’s Smith Memorial Student Union, 1825 SW Broadway, 7 pm

APRIL STREETER, ELLY BLUE An evening with two of Portland’s best-known bike advocates. Powell’s Books on Hawthorne, 3723 SE Hawthorne, 228-4651, 7:30 pm

FRIDAY 11/9

PETER AMES CARLIN Bruce is Carlin’s intimate biography of Jersey boy-turnedrock icon Bruce Springsteen, featuring anecdotes from friends, family, and the Boss himself. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside, 228-4651, 7:30 pm

SATURDAY 11/10

THIS IS WHAT IT MEANS TO SAY PORTLAND Readings from authors Mitchell Jackson, Tom Spanbauer, Kerry Cohen and more. Someday Lounge, 125 NW 5th, 248-1030, 5 pm, free

MOTHER COURAGE AND HER CHILDREN Theatre Vertigo’s production of Bertolt Brecht’s passionate anti-war play. Theater! Theatre!, 3430 SE Belmont, Thurs-Sat 7:30 pm, through Nov 17, $15

COMEDY CRAZY DELICIOUS COMEDY Featuring headliners Augie Smith and Ian Karmel. Dante’s, 1 SW 3rd, 226-6630. Thurs Nov 8, 10 pm, $5.

SUPERHEROES A comedy benefit for the families and victims of the Dark Knight Rises shooting in Colorado. Hawthorne Theatre Lounge, 1507 SE 39th, 233-7100, Sat Nov 10, 8 pm, $5

THE WEEKLY RECURRING HUMOR NIGHT Featuring performances from Anthony Lopez, Tynan DeLong, and more. Tonic Lounge, 3100 NE Sandy, 2380543, Wed Nov 7, 9:30 pm

VISUAL ART

SUNDAY 11/11

FLUXUS WITH TOOLS

The Dahlia Bakery Cookbook shares all manner of treatmaking secrets from the James Beard Outstanding Restaurateur-winning Seattle chef. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside, 228-4651, 7:30 pm

HAUNTED

TOM DOUGLAS

A performance lecture by Fluxus artist Alison Knowles.

PNCA Swigert Commons, 1241 NW Johnson, Thurs Nov 8, 6:30 pm

TUESDAY 11/13

A group show curated by Erin McCarty featuring works focused on the theme of anxiety. Pony Club Gallery, 625 NW Everett St. #105, through Dec 1

A reading by Mercury reporter Sarah Mirk and poet Carl Adamschick. PSU’s Smith Memorial Student Union, 1825 SW Broadway, 7 pm, free

HEADTRIP

SARAH MIRK, CARL ADAMSCHICK

MARK BOWDEN The author of Black Hawk Down presents The Finish, about the hunt for Osama Bin Laden. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside, 228-4651, 7:30 pm

THEATER THE BODY OF AN AMERICAN Playwright Dan O’Brien’s story of befriending war reporter Paul Watson. Ellyn Bye Studio at the Armory, 128 NW 11th, 445-3700, Tues-Sun 7:30 pm, Sat-Sun 2 pm, through Nov 11, $20-39

BLOODY BLOODY ANDREW JACKSON Portland Playhouse’s offers an uneven production of this “presidential emo rock musical.” ALISON HALLETT Portland Playhouse, 602 NE Prescott, 488-5822, Thurs-Sat

32 Portland Mercury November 7, 2012

An episodic, live, semi-improvised comedy series, following the life and times of Portland band Ghost Dad. Action/ Adventure Theater, 1050 SE Clinton, Fri 8 & 10:30 pm, Sat 9 pm and Sun 8 pm, through Nov 18, $12

New works by Tripper Dungan, most of which react with ChromaDepth 3D glasses in order to make Dungan’s cartoon imagery even more immersive. Redux, 811 E Burnside, 231-7336, through Dec 4

MARIANNE WEX An exhibition of large photographic panels, taken between 1972 and 1977 in Hamburg, Germany. YU Contemporary, 800 SE 10th, 236-7996, through Dec 15

SIGHT UNSEEN: NEW WORKS BY WOMEN The Siren Nation festival begins with this exhibit of over 40 Northwest artists. Albina Press, 5012 SE Hawthorne, 282-5214, Thurs Nov 8, 6 pm, free

For a complete calendar of arts events, see portlandmercury.com

Sold Out

Fashion

by Elissa Hall

Content 2012

P

ORTLAND HAS its art events pretty well covered, between series like the TimeBased Art Fest, Design Week, and Stumptown Comics Fest, not to mention the gamut of Thursday and Friday art walks. However, in a town flooded with galleries and art events, REIF Portland’s fashion scene has tended to develop outside of the mainstream realm and—let’s be SWORD + FERN honest—its most visible moments have so far been among its feeblest. Attempts influenced

by New York fashion events, like Fashion Week and Fashion’s Night Out, have provided a glimmer of fashion’s presence here, but Portland always requires a distinct style identity of its own, one that synthesizes the city’s love of art and design with its approach to fashion.

As PINO’s Crispin Argento puts it, “The show Portlandia famously coined, ‘Portland is the place where young people go to retire.’ I think that statement is incorrect. Portland is a place where young educated people come to pursue their dreams and their crafts.”

Enter Content 2012, the third installation of Portland’s most original, premier fashion event. from designer Emily Baker’s primary focus (Full disclosure: Mercury Managing Editor and on jewelry. Moreover, the presentation will Sold Out columnist Marjorie Skinner helps be accompanied by a sound installation from produce it.) Content fills the noticeable gap PAWPRINCE, Lovers’ Kerby Ferris’ spanking between art and fashion in the Portland design new solo adventure. scene. Originally founded by Project Runway Fashion “haus” Reif observed a surge winner and formerly Portland-based in Portland popularity this past year.

Content designer Gretchen Jones, the event Three-quarters due to hard work grants local designers complete 2012 and one-quarter due to hot models creative autonomy over one room and photography, designer LindAce Hotel, 1022 SW apiece, for one night only, at the sey Reif has established herself Stark, Sun Nov 11, Ace Hotel. The results are myriad on the front lines of Portland’s 5-10 pm, $15-20, installations that take over the fashion community, one immacall ages. entire second floor, representing a ulately designed turban at a time. mix of the scene, from the avant-garde This time Reif pares down the “party (Julia Barbee’s perfumed crystals, anyone?) to atmosphere” of previous years to one visually the industrial minimalists (Draught Dry Goods, striking element—let's hope for French new the Good Flock). A new component added last wave-inspired performances similar to Reif’s year is a pop-up shop at the Ace’s adjacent event fall campaign. Another notable installation space, the Cleaners, where attendees can shop comes from Made on the Moon, a very new the merchandise of the event’s designers. line (check out their recently launched website, A few highlights from this year’s roster of madeonthemoon.co) that explores experimenparticipants: tal Japanese shibori dye techniques.

On the heels of a tumultuous year that While it’s essential to support the visibility included a re-branding, relocation, and a of women’s fashion in Portland, menswear has severe bike accident, Julia Barbee fiercely also seen a resurgence, thanks in part to PINO’s returns to the Content 2012 bill. With an Argento. When asked about his intention at MFA in studio art, she has performed solo Content to help Portland men properly tie their and group exhibitions for over 10 years. Botneckwear, he said, “Yes, I will be showing peotom line: Barbee is an experienced artist who ple how to properly tie a bow tie, showing the speaks to walking the line between conceptual different types of bow ties, and celebrating the art and fashion. “I try to just trust my instincts, gentleman in general. In addition, I will have a knowing that as our culture and technologies little bit about what I am trying to do ultimately shift, the ideas of fashion and art, galleries, with PINO in terms of economic development and even space are changing… I’m just happy and sustainable fashion.” Indeed, Portland I can keep making things I love that tread fine menswear will be in full and handsome form lines.” Expect an installation that explores the with additional rooms by Tanner Goods, the “manipulation and reshaping of the body as Portland Collection, and man-friendly accesan artistic process” in response to the multiple sory lines Draught Dry Goods, the Good Flock, evolutions of the past year.

Vanport Outfitters, and Poler.

Other enticing presentations include the With nearly 30 participating lines, it debut of Sword + Fern’s “Water Object” series, appears Content 2012 will offer something “a collection of tabletop objects” crafted from for every sartorial and aesthetic taste. Here’s concrete and natural materials. These will hoping that the event harnesses its conceplikely challenge ideas about space and time tual power to propel Portland fashion to its (hence the name, a reference to the fluidity fullest, weirdest potential. With this smart inherent in water) and marks a departure lineup, it’s almost certain to.

Find Your Perfect Match portlandmercury.com/personals

THIS WEEK ON THE MERCURY ’S FASHION BLOG mod.portlandmercury.com

CONTENT 2012: RECAP, PICS, GOSSIP! Comment on this story at portlandmercury.com

November 7, 2012 Portland Mercury 33

W E N !

DAY

W E N K! LOO )

Shit. d l O e (Sam

Now on Wednesdays!

34 Portland Mercury November 7, 2012

News

Feature

Picks

Music

Arts

Food Food

Film

TV

Sex

Grendel’s Coffee f House Serving organic coffee

Fun

Last Supper

Vegan & Gluten Free Available

BEAN, BAR, REVOLUTION Craft Chocolate Swings into Gear By Chris Onstad

8th & East Burnside

Happy Hour 3pm-6pm

503-595-9550

we deliver 503-335-0300 T

LIZ DEVINE

HE LOCAL CRAFT chocolate-making was like a slap to the head. Smooth, with orange community is preparing itself for a boom. and dried fruit flavors particular to Madagascar In the way that Portland charcutiers, cheese- beans, it made the other bar taste like a child makers, and distillers set up shop in the last hitting all the black keys on a piano. Now eager decade and made nationally renowned names to compare local products, Lindley brought out for themselves, local chocolatiers, bean-to-bar samples from Portland’s own CocanĂş, Woodchocolate makers, and chocolate purveyors block Chocolate, and Mana Chocolate. “Bean to barâ€? is a term you hear here and have—seemingly independent of one another—put the elements in place to make Port- there, and it’s fairly self-explanatory: The land’s chocolate scene a niche explosion in the farm-fermented cacao beans (read: stored along jungle roads while birds roost on them) coming years.

Aubrey Lindley, one half of the team that come to the chocolate maker whole and raw, founded the Westside’s Cacao shop in 2006, and are then put through the labor-intensive is one of our most evangelic experts on the stages of sorting, cracking and winnowing, subject. Cacao, co-owned by Lindley and part- refining and conching, aging, and tempering, before they are crafted into the finer Jesse Manis, is a museum of fine nal edible product, all under one roof. bar chocolates and confections from Craft unusual for a single outfit to do around the world, with a curated chocolate: It’s the bean processing and then proselection of proudly displayed lothe best of duce a retail confection, as there is cal products. Lindley is to chocolate all crafts! a traditional division between the what Steve Jones is to cheese, what engineering-type mindsets that do Geoff Latham is to game, what Elias the dirty, noisy, machine-driven work, Cairo is to cured meat. He can, almost by scent alone, blindly identify nearly every prod- and the artist-type mindsets that create the uct in his shop, and launch into the history of final product. The “farm-to-tableâ€? ethos that the cacao bean varietal in each bar, as well as drives so much local food production, of the personality and proficiency of its distant course, means we have a disproportionately (and not so distant) maker. We tasted nearly a high number that do just that. Mana is one, dozen bars together one recent afternoon, and as is Woodblock, and SebastiĂĄn Cisneros of he began demystifying a product I lacked even CocanĂş was off hunting beans in Ecuador at the most basic framework of understanding. press time—so that will soon be three, out of By the end of the session, it was clear that I was around 36 bean-to-bar companies nationwide.

Mana’s bar was pure, dark, and rich, an arunlikely to enjoy a Hershey bar ever again; this was the equivalent of giving up Coors Light for chetypal chocolate that smoothly coated the tongue and began to do what good chocolate Belgian ales—so hardly a loss.

It’s entirely possible to geek out on choco- does: create that primal awareness of somelate, the way wine bores take one of the world’s thing exciting beyond nutrition, that physical most enjoyable substances and, with their and emotional thing which chocolatiers curitight-fitting sport coats and insufferable ped- ously forbid putting into words. Woodblock’s antry, suck all the joy out of it. However, the sample had its own personality, its own subtly chocolate makers I spoke with in the ensuing different sheen, snap, and mouth feel. Both weeks seem universally against poncey de- were sophisticated, indistinguishable in qualscription. Elizabeth Montes of SahagĂşn Hand- ity from European bars, and made less than made Chocolates vehemently advises, “Don’t five miles away.

No local chocolate story would be complete learn new words. Learn new tastes.� That said, resources such as the flavor wheel in the without an appearance by grand dame Sarah 33 Bars of Chocolate tasting booklet (33books. Hart, of long-standing Alma Chocolate. Like a com) provide a starting-point vocabulary that Tom Robbins heroine, she is a lanky, fedorabegins to unlock the doors and help us identify topped, bangle-cuffed bohemian, writer, and what we like. Without these words, we are like veteran cook. Her bon bons, available since the new wine drinker in the bottle shop, grunt- 2005, are luxurious and understated things ing, “I don’t know� and “dry?� to the steadily that shun novelty and trends. “I just listen to the chocolate,� she says, of where she starts deflating clerk.

After trying some dark and troubled bars by when divining new flavors. Her tireless cona renegade Spanish chocolatier with challeng- viction, paired with a devil-may-care business ing ideas about texture, Lindley brought out a attitude, has me convinced that soon the rest bar of Madagascar 70 percent, made by Dande- of the world will be listening, as well. lion Chocolate in San Francisco. The disparity @PdxMercFd on Twitter between the two, despite identical ingredients,

3240 n williams www.pizza-agogo.com

 Â?Â? Â? Â?Â?Â?Â?Â? Â? Â?   Â?  Â? Â

Find restaurants, bars, and reader reviews at portlandmercury.com Comment on this story at portlandmercury.com

November 7, 2012 Portland Mercury 35

INVITE YOU TO AN ADVANCE SCREENING OF

Send an email (subject line “BD Portland Mercury”) with your full name and address to contestpdx@gmail.com for your chance to win complimentary tickets!

Enter to win a TWILIGHT prize pack by texting the keyword RENESMEE and your ZIP CODE to 43549.

THIS FILM IS RATED PG-13. Parental Guidance is suggested for those under 13.

Please note: Passes received through this promotion do not guarantee you a seat at the theatre. Seating is on a first come, first served basis, except for members of the reviewing press. Theatre is overbooked to ensure a full house. No admittance once screening has begun. All federal, state and local regulations apply. A recipient of tickets assumes any and all risks related to use of ticket, and accepts any restrictions required by ticket provider. Paramount Pictures, The Stranger and their affiliates accept no responsibility or liability in connection with any loss or accident incurred in connection with use of a prize. Tickets cannot be exchanged, transferred or redeemed for cash, in whole or in part. We are not responsible if, for any reason, recipient is unable to use his/her ticket in whole or in part. All federal and local taxes are the responsibility of the winner. Void where prohibited by law. No purchase necessary. Participating sponsors, their employees and family members and their agencies are not eligible. NO PHONE CALLS!

IN THEATERS EVERYWHERE NOVEMBER 16 WWW.BREAKINGDAWN-THEMOVIE.COM

Portland Mercury WED: 11-07 YOU AND A GUEST ARE INVITED TO 4.75” X 3.25” AN ADVANCE SS SCREENING ALL.BD2-P.1107.PM

VISIT www.GOFOBO.cOm/RSVP AND ENTER THE CODE: mERc4V36 to download your screening passes.

Screening will be held on Monday, November 12th at 7PM! RATED R. RESTRICTED. UNDER 17 REQUIRES ACCOMPANYING PARENT OR ADULT GUARDIAN. Please Note: Tickets are limited and will be distributed on a first come, first served basis while supplies last.

No phone calls, please. Limit two tickets per person. Each pass admits one. Seating is not guaranteed. Arrive early. Theatre is not responsible for overbooking. This screening will be monitored for unauthorized recording. By attending, you agree not to bring any audio or video recording device into the theatre (audio recording devices for credentialed press excepted) and consent to a physical search of your belongings and person. Any attempted use of recording devices will result in immediate removal from the theatre, forfeiture, and may subject you to criminal and civil liability. Please allow additional time for heightened security. You can assist us by leaving all nonessential bags at home or in your vehicle.

IN THEATERS NOVEMBER 21ST SILVERLININGSPLAYBOOKMOVIE.COM

portland mercury tHurS 11/8 4.75 x 3.25” all.Slp-p.1108.pm

SS

8028 SE Stark Street, Portland, OR • 503.261.1180 • www.tubandtan.com 36 Portland Mercury November 7, 2012

Film

Secret Agent Man

Skyfall: James Bond, Unhinged by Ned Lannamann fully assumed the mantle, with his grim, tightlipped, almost thuggish 007 a worthy reinvention of Ian Fleming’s character.

(The phenomenal sky-jumping pubSkyfall licity stunt at the Summer Olympics dir. Sam Mendes surely didn’t hurt.) For whatever reaOpens Fri Nov 9 son, Skyfall—the 23rd “official” Bond Various film—is the most anticipated in deTheaters cades, and for the most part it doesn’t disappoint, although it isn’t as thrilling as 2006’s Casino Royale.

In a solid pre-titles sequence, Bond chases a stolen hard drive containing the names of embedded agents through the streets of Istanbul. He’s mistakenly gunned down by fellow MI6 operative Eve (Naomie Harris), who’s under orders from M (Dame Judi Dench) to take the shot. Believed dead, Bond spends the early stages of Skyfall hidSKYFALL With someone having stolen his training wheels, all he could do was glare menacingly. ing out in the tropics, drunk, unshaven, and E’RE ALL IN LOVE with James the general global unease of the day, when resentful. It’s fun to see 007 so unhinged, Bond again. Maybe it’s because we there’s something pretty appealing about a and just as great to see him whip himself nearly lost him when MGM virtually went hero without superpowers. Maybe, and most back into fighting shape once he reports for bankrupt in 2010. Or perhaps it’s due to likely, it’s because Daniel Craig has now duty. Bond goes to Shanghai, then Macau,

W

Rock Bottom

One of Us

Regional Film at the NW Filmmakers’ Fest by Marjorie Skinner

Smashed: From Fun Drunk to Scary Drunk by Alison Hallett

S

but most of the action in Skyfall takes place in the UK, including a lengthy sequence in the London Underground and a protracted, somewhat sluggish climax on the Scottish moors.

This means the typical exotic settings are pushed aside for gray, gloomy Blighty— Skyfall could be the dourest picture in the franchise’s history. Gadgets are summarily dismissed, and the customary harem of Bond girls is reduced to the lone Sévérine (Bérénice Marlohe, who’s plenty). As such, it’s the preposterous, over-the-top villain—a creepily blond Javier Bardem—that remains the only touchstone from the established Bond formula. Bardem’s hilarious and fantastic, and a welcome relief from doddering ol’ Dame Dench, who’s in this movie an awful lot.

A big chunk of Ian Fleming’s backstory for Bond (revealed in the novel You Only Live Twice) becomes a plot point for Skyfall, but for the most part, the film is intent on stepping out of the shadow of 007’s immense legacy.

That means Skyfall lacks the series’ typically giddy charm, but there’s enough cold-blooded intrigue to replace it. And it means Bond isn’t finished evolving. Here’s to a long, actionpacked future.

SMASHED “You know Irish coffee isn’t the same as regular coffee, right?”

OME PEOPLE CAN DRINK for fun and principal invites her to an AA meeting, she some people can’t, and figuring out you’re nervously explains to the group that recentin the latter camp is rarely pretty. Smashed in- ly, “Things have gone from embarrassing to troduces a schoolteacher who’s bottoming out scary.” Charlie supports her decision to get sohard: Kate (Mary Elizabeth Winstead) is a heavy ber, but when his own partying continues unabated, the couple is left to figure out whether drinker in her mid-20s, and “fun drunk” is fast their entire relationship was based on dissolving into sad, destructive, smoksharing the type of good times Kate is ing-crack-under-a-bridge drunk.

Smashed no longer capable of having.

Smashed spends its first third Winstead’s smart performance or so establishing Kate’s boozy dir. James Ponsoldt Opens Fri Nov 9 utterly grounds the film, even as bona fides: First she lies to her Fox Tower 10 Smashed’s narrative feels underdestudents and her principal about veloped—Kate’s drunken exploits are why she’s vomiting at work, and thoroughly documented, but her recovthen there’s the aforementioned crack incident. It isn’t long before she’s pissing in ery itself is glossed over, focusing more on the corner of a convenience store at 2 am af- how her sobriety affects her relationships ter the clerk refuses to sell her more booze. than on the process of getting sober in the Where Smashed diverges from most alcoholic first place. Where Smashed really succeeds, cautionary tales, though, is in acknowledg- though, is in offering a nuanced, human poring that drinking can be fun. Kate and her trait of an alcoholic. Kate is a good person husband Charlie (Breaking Bad’s Aaron Paul) who does bad things when she’s drunk, and might drink all the time, but they often have a the film doesn’t downplay the fact that Kate good time doing it. For a while, at least, booze and Charlie had some pretty fun times when transforms the raw materials of their life—sex they were drinking together. It’s refreshand bike rides and late-night croquet games— ing to see a movie that permits this kind of complexity, and it’s impossible not to root for into intense, glamorous adventures.

But the consequences of Kate’s drinking Kate as she finds the courage to take responkeep piling up, and when her laconic vice sibility for her disease.

L

THE CRIME OF THE D’AUTREMONT BROTHERS Guilty... of being three handsome devils!

Shelton’s Your Sister’s Sister may have already IKE MANY of our art scenes, Portland’s been around the block, for instance, but their filmmakers are a small but active coninclusion in the festival is important because it tingency of the film world. We have some big places them on the timeline. names, but only a few, and some well-known As always, lesser-known and distributed titles under our belts, but again, just a few. films from throughout the Northwest are The city’s biggest boom of late has been in ripe for discovery. The shorts program television rather than film—but in an inmight sound like a risky, haphazard dustry as small as ours, that counts.

The proposition, but it’s embedded Now in its 39th year, the North39th with gems (I’ve said it before, west Filmmakers’ Festival Northwest but the experimental films of showcases the best and most Filmmakers’ Orland Nutt are a goddamn relevant output from the reFestival local treasure), and this year gion. In part, it’s to invite the dirs. Various features a number of excelcommunity to discover what’s Fri Nov 9-Sun Nov 18 lent, if macabre, documentahappening onscreen in their Northwest Film Center’s ries, most notably The Crime of corner of the world, but at its Whitsell Auditorium the d’Autremont Brothers, about a heart, it’s aimed as much at bur1923 Oregon train robbery, and the geoning filmmakers as the viewing bleak, unflinching East Hastings Pharmapublic—something observable in its marketcy, which documents the life of pharmacists ing, which this year features a bleeding heart whose primary duty is dispensing methabeing revealed behind screen curtains. done in the downtown eastside of VancouPerhaps the fest’s most important function, ver, BC. But whatever your preferred genre, though, is creating an archive of the Norththe Northwest Filmmakers’ Festival has any west’s film culture. The festival isn’t necessarentry point to the active independent underily geared toward high-profile premieres: Feaground at your door. tures like James Westby’s Rid of Me and Lynn

Comment on these stories at portlandmercury.com

November 7, 2012 Portland Mercury 37

“A front-runner for best American film of the year.”

News

-ERIC HYNES, THE VILLAGE VOICE

Feature

Zachary Booth

A film by Ira Sachs keepthelightsonfilm.com

4.75" X 2"

facebook.com/keepthelightsonfilm

Jay

Steve

Film Film

TV

Sex

Fun

twitter.com/ktlomovie

THUR 11/8

AE: (circle one:) Angela Maria Josh Tim

Freelance 3

McCool

ART APPROVED AE APPROVED CLIENT APPROVED

THE FLY Above: Jeff Goldblum, shirtless, with a monkey. That is all. Good day.

ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT PINK ’N’ PORN FOR $1.99!!!

Deadline:

onfirmation #:

Two bucks, two movies: 1966’s Love Robots—a Japanese flick described as “a campy, erotic version of Alphaville”—and 1979’s Ms. Magnificent, a porno that was originally titled Superwoman—until DC Comics found out, at which point the filmmakers used permanent marker to scribble out the “S” shield on Ms. Magnificent’s “robust bust,” then released it anyway.

Behold! Cinema. Cinema 21.

BIG EASY EXPRESS In April 2011, the bands Mumford and Sons, Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros, and Old Crow Medicine Show traveled from Oakland to New Orleans by passenger train, and Big Easy Express documents the brief tour. Trouble is, these are some of the most boring bands on the planet, a point hammered home by watching them play “This Train Is Bound for Glory” a gajillion times. One of the musicians actually says to the camera, “It’s like we left our baggage at home and just packed our instruments.” So yeah, it’s pretty insufferable, and director Emmett Malloy chops up the concert performances with footage from different nights, assuming you won’t notice the musicians are wearing different clothes. And at a scant 66 minutes, Big Easy Express is a rip-off as well.

NED LANNAMANN Clinton Street Theater.

THE EFFECT OF DADA AND SURREALISM ON HOLLYWOOD MOVIES OF THE 1930S Film historian Dennis Nyback presents clips from eight feature films that show how “Hollywood cheerfully took serious art movements and dropped them into feature films without any framing devices to enchant and mystify the audiences reeling from the Great Depression.” The Faux Museum.

★ THE FLY See My, What a Busy Week!, pg. 15. Hollywood Theatre.

A FORMER ROCKSTAR IS hUNTING DOwN A NAZI CRIMINAL. ThIS COULD BE hIS GREATEST hIT.

★ GREMLINS “I warned you. With mogwai comes much responsibility.

But you didn’t listen.” Laurelhurst Theater. ★ HUMP! See pg. 5. Cinema 21. ★ KUNG FU THEATER Old-school kung fu on 35mm. This time: 1980’s Fist of the White Lotus! Hollywood Theatre.

THE MAN WITH THE IRON FISTS

sean Penn

“DAZZLING TO BEhOLD.”

PORTLAND_TMB_1108 , ANThONY LANE

FROM AwARD-wINNING DIRECTOR

PAOLO SORRENTINO

hARRY DEAN

Food

LIVING ROOM® THEATERS 341 SW Tenth Avenue, Portland (971) 222-2010

PORTLAND MERCURY

Artist: (circle one:) Heather Staci Freelance 2

Emmett

Arts

© Southport Music Box Corp

musicboxfilms.com

STARTS FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 9

Aurelio

Music

Film Shorts

“Exquisitely, even thrillingly authentic.”

-A.0. SCOTT, THE NEW YORK TIMES

Thure Lindhardt

Picks

STANTON

jUDD

hIRSCh

EVE

wINNER

CANNES FILM FESTIVAL Prize of the ecumenical Jury

hEwSON AND FRANCES McDORMAND

Regal EXCLUSIVE ENGAGEMENT PORTLAND Fox Tower Stadium 10 STARTS FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 9 (800) FANDANGO #327 38 Portland Mercury November 7, 2012

PORTLAND MERCURY

CHECK DIRECTORIES fOR SHOWTIMES NO PASSES ACCEPTED

Somehow RZA managed to make his very own kung fu movie, and it’s exactly like you’d expect: really, really enthusiastic, and really, really not very good. Weirdly drained of his charisma, RZA stars as “Blacksmith,” a... blacksmith who eventually makes himself some iron fists, which he then uses to punch the fuck out of people. Lucy Liu and Russell Crowe also show up, and there’s a lot of fighting between various clans, and a lot of callbacks to Shaw Brothers flicks, and a lot of ridiculous wigs.

It’s kind of fun and entirely incomprehensible, and the action is underwhelming. But still, good for RZA. ERIK HENRIKSEN Various Theaters.

NOISE AND RESISTANCE

★ THE OTHER DREAM TEAM What does the 1992 Lithuanian Olympic basketball team have to do with the Grateful Dead? Find out in this documentary that mixes basketball, international politics, and the fall of the Iron Curtain. At the 1988 Olympics, the USSR won the gold medal in basketball over the US, but many of the main players were Lithuanian, made to compete for their Soviet occupiers. The emergence of an independent Lithuania, the backgrounds of the players, the country’s basketball fever, and an Olympic comeback make for an exciting story. GILLIAN ANDERSON Fox Tower 10. ★ SKYFALL See review this issue. Various Theaters. ★ SMASHED See review this issue. Fox Tower 10.

THE SUPER 8 DREAMS OF SAUL LEVINE Artist Saul Levine presents a selection of his work from the past 35 years—”a lot of it highly edited where splice tape becomes an essential component of the image,” according to Cinema Project. More info: cinemaproject. org. YU Contemporary.

THIS MUST BE THE PLACE This might be the most confusing and confused movie ever put into the ethersphere. Sean Penn plays a cross between a doddering grandma, Robert Smith, and burned-out Ozzy Osbourne. He also wears a shit-ton of makeup, which you get to admire at least seven times in claustrophobic close-ups. Penn is Cheyenne, a soft-spoken eccentric former rockstar who lives in a mansion in Dublin with his firefighter wife (Frances McDormand) and trawls the mall with a sciatic shuffle and a shopping cart alongside his teenage goth girl BFF. But about halfway into this shambling thing, Penn gets a call that his father has died—then it turns into a Nazi-hunting/road-trip/Holocaust story, with Judd Hirsch, Harry Dean Stanton, and David Byrne (?!?!). This Must Be the Place feels like a really perplexing game of Mad Libs. COURTNEY FERGUSON Fox Tower 10.

★ WE WERE HERE For years, documentaries about the AIDS epidemic landed so close to the trauma of that time that they couldn’t be seen properly. Fifteen years after protease inhibitors stopped the merciless death march of AIDS in America, the horror and heroism of the early years can finally be commemorated in full. David Weissman’s documentary We Were Here tracks the “gay plague” as it ravaged San Francisco in the early 1980s, striking down a generation of men and drawing forth exceptional tenacity and bravery from those lucky enough to be survivors. (Perennially unsung heroes: lesbians, who raced in to help when gay men proved too sick to care for each other.) It’s an awesome thing to behold. You’ll bawl your eyes out and be grateful for the opportunity.

DAVID SCHMADER Fifth Avenue Cinema.

THE WORLD’S GREATEST SINNER A screening of “Timothy Carey’s grindhouse magnum opus,” an “outrageous and prophetic examination of religion, politics, and rock ’n’ roll.” Presented by Carey’s son. Hollywood Theatre.

WRECK-IT RALPH

Q*bert, his game long since unplugged, is a gibberishspouting panhandler. When he’s done racking up combos in Street Fighter, Zangief finds solace at Bad-Anon, where videogame villains share their vulnerabilities. For FOR ENGAGEMENT thoseTHIS of us raised in the Mario Age, the first few minutes of Wreck-It Ralph are like a videogame Who Framed Roger Rabbit, with everyone from Sonic to Bowser ★ THE NORTHWEST FILMMAKERS’ stopping by. But once its nostalgic, clever opening is FESTIVAL out of the way, Wreck-It Ralph gets significantly less See Film, this issue. Northwest Film Center’s Whitsell fun: It’s just Toy Story in an arcade. ERIK HENRIKSEN Auditorium.

Various Theaters.

A German documentary about the international music scene, “where unity derives from autonomy along with the best punk sound you’ve heard for years.” Half of the proceeds go to theNO Rock ’n’ Roll Camp for Girls.

SORRY, PASSES ACCEPTED Hollywood Theatre.

★ MEANS WE RECOMMEND IT. THEATER LOCATIONS ARE ACCURATE FRIDAY NOVEMBER 9-THURSDAY NOVEMBER 15, UNLESS OTHERWISE NOTED. FILM TIMES AND SHORTS ARE ALSO AVAILABLE AT PORTLANDMERCURY.COM.

S

T

News

Feature

Picks

Music

Arts

Food

Film

TV

Sex

Fun

Film Times

LISTINGS ARE GOOD FRIDAY-THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 9 -15 UNLESS OTHERWISE NOTED.

The Effect of Dada and Surrealism on Hollywood Movies of the 1930s Sat 8

Fifth Avenue Cinema 510 SW Hall, 725-3551

We Were Here Fri-Sat 7, 9:30; Sun 3

Fox Tower 10

846 SW Park, 800-326-3264

Brooklyn Castle Fri-Thurs 12:20, 5:05, 9:35 Cloud Atlas Fri-Thurs 12:30, 4:15, 7:45 Looper Fri-Thurs 12:50, 4:25, 7:10, 9:40 The Master Fri-Thurs 12:40, 4:10, 7, 9:45 The Other Dream Team Fri-Thurs 2:25, 4:40, 7:05 The Perks of Being a Wallflower Fri-Thurs 12:05, 2:30, 4:45, 7:15, 9:30 Samsara Fri-Thurs 2:45, 7:25 The Sessions Fri-Thurs 12:10, 12:45, 2:55, 5:15, 7:30, 9:10, 9:45 Seven Psychopaths Fri-Thurs 12, 2:35, 5, 7:35, 9:55 Smashed Fri-Thurs 12:15, 2:40, 4:50, 7:40, 9:35 This Must Be the Place Fri-Thurs 12:35, 4:20, 7:20, 9:50

Northwest Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium 1219 SW Park, 221-1156

The Northwest Filmmakers’ Festival See nwfilm.org for showtimes.

Pioneer Place Stadium 6 340 SW Morrison, 800-326-3264

Flight Fri-Wed 12:15, 3:40, 7:10, 10:40 The Man with the Iron Fists Fri-Wed 1:15, 4:45, 7:45, 10:20

Pitch Perfect Fri 12:30, 3:50; Sat 3:50; Sun-Wed 12:30, 3:50 Sinister Fri-Mon 7:20, 10:10; Tues 10:10; Wed 7:20, 10:10 Skyfall Fri-Wed 12, 3:30, 7, 10:30 Twilight Breaking Dawn Marathon Thurs 11:25 am The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2 Thurs 10 pm Wreck-It Ralph Fri-Wed 4:15, 10 Wreck-It Ralph 3D Fri-Wed 12:45, 7:30

Northeast

Skyfall Fri-Sun 12, 3:20, 6:40, 10 Skyfall IMAX Fri-Tues 12:30, 3:50, 7:10, 10:30; Thurs 12:30, 3:50, 7:10, 10:30

To Kill a Mockingbird Thurs 7 Twilight Breaking Dawn Marathon Thurs 11:25 am The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2 Thurs 10 pm

Roseway Theater 7229 NE Sandy, 282-2898

Skyfall Fri 1, 4:30, 8, 11; Sat-Thurs 1, 4:30, 8

Southeast Academy Theater 7818 SE Stark, 252-0500

The Bourne Legacy Fri 6:30, 9:15; Sat 9:45; SunThurs 6:30, 9:15 Brave Fri-Mon 12:10, 2:15, 4:25; Tues-Wed 2:15, 4:25; Thurs 2:15 The Dark Knight Rises Fri-Sat 8:35; Mon-Thurs 8:35 End of Watch Fri-Thurs 3:45, 9:55 Moonrise Kingdom Fri-Mon 11:50, 6; Tues-Thurs 6 ParaNorman Fri-Mon 12, 4:15; Tues-Thurs 4:15 Robot & Frank Fri-Thurs 1:50, 8 Trouble with the Curve Fri-Thurs 2, 6:15 The Walking Dead Sun 9 (free)

Avalon

3451 SE Belmont, 238-1617

Brave Fri-Thurs 12:55, 6:20 The Campaign Fri-Thurs 4:30, 8:10, 10 The Expendables 2 Fri-Thurs 4:20, 8, 9:55 Ice Age: Continental Drift Fri-Sat 11:10 am, 2:45; Sun 2:45; Mon 11:10 am, 2:45; Tues-Thurs 2:45

ParaNorman Fri-Thurs 12:45, 2:30, 6:15

Bagdad Theater

3702 SE Hawthorne, 225-5555

The Campaign Fri 9:45; Mon 8:20; Wed-Thurs 8:20 Legend of Aahhhs Fri 7 ParaNorman Sun 2, 6; Mon 6; Wed-Thurs 6 The Walking Dead Sun 9 2021 SE Hawthorne, 231-7919

Skyfall Fri 5:30, 8:20; Sat-Sun 2:40, 5:30, 8:20; MonThurs 5:30, 8:20

Clinton Street Theater

4122 NE Sandy, 281-4215

2522 SE Clinton, 238-8899

Access to the Danger Zone Wed 7:30 Arsenic and Old Lace Fri 7; Sat-Sun 2 Beasts of the Southern Wild Fri 9:10; Sat 5, 7; Sun

The 11Eleven Project Sun 2 (free), 4 (free) Beauty Is Embarrassing Fri-Mon 7; Wed 7 Big Easy Express Fri-Sat 9; Sun 10; Mon 9; Tues 10; Wed 9

K2uesday Tues 7 Rocky Horror Picture Show Sat 11:30 pm Siren Nation Film Festival Thurs 8 The Walking Dead Sun 9

800 SE 10th Ave, 236-7996

The Super 8 Dreams of Saul Levine Mon-Tues

Laurelhurst Theater 2735 E Burnside, 232-5511

The Dark Knight Rises Fri-Sun 3:30, 8:50; Mon-Thurs 8:50

Gremlins Fri-Sun 4:15, 9:40; Mon-Thurs 9:40 Moonrise Kingdom Fri 6:45; Sat-Sun 1:30, 6:45; MonThurs 6:45

ParaNorman Sat-Sun 2 Robot & Frank Fri 7:30; Sat-Sun 2:15, 7:30; Mon-Thurs 7:30

THE

FLY

8; Mon-Thurs 5:30, 8

Brave Fri-Mon 3 The Expendables 2 Fri-Mon 10:05; Wed-Thurs 10:05 The Odd Life of Timothy Green Fri-Mon 5:30; Wed-

Thurs 2:30, 7:45

A 35 mm pRINT OF DAVID CRONENBERG’S

Wreck-It Ralph Fri 5:30, 8; Sat-Sun 12:50, 3:10, 5:30,

5736 NE 33rd, 249-7474

EVENT HOTLINE: (503) 493-1128

now servInG Beer & wIne. All AGes stIll AdmItted!

6712 SE Milwaukie, 236-5257

YU Contemporary

Thurs 5:30

4122 NE SaNdy BoulEvard

Moreland Theatre

Kennedy School

ParaNorman Sat-Sun 12:30 Trouble with the Curve Fri-Mon 7:45; Tues 2:30; Wed-

enter taining Por tl and since 1926

Cinemagic

Hollywood Theatre

5, 9:10; Mon-Thurs 9:10 The Fly Fri-Mon 9:30; Tues-Wed 9:45; Thurs 9:30 Kung Fu Theater Tues 7:30 The Master Fri 6:45, 9:20; Sat-Sun 3:30, 6:45, 9:20; Mon-Thurs 6:45, 9:20 Noise and Resistance Mon 7 Samsara Fri 7:10; Sat 3, 5:10, 7:10; Sun 3, 7:10; MonThurs 7:10 The Walking Dead Sun 7 The World’s Greatest Sinner Sat 9

Portland’s Historic non-Profit tHeatre

TIN HOUSE PrESENTS ARTHUR MILLER’S

139 NW 2nd, 206-218-3984

1510 NE Multnomah, 800-326-3264

THE MISFITS

The Faux Museum

Lloyd Center 10 Cinema

WiTh adaM BravE BooK SiGNiNG! sUndAY AUGUst 19 · 2:00pm

Downtown

oPENS friday NovEMBEr 9

7:30

Northwest Cinema 21

616 NW 21st, 223-4515

All-You-Can-Eat Pink ’n’ Porn for $1.99!!! Wed Love Robots at 7, Ms. Magnificent at 8:30 American Meat Mon 7 Blue Velvet Tues 7 Hump! Fri-Sat 4:30, 7, 9:30, 11:59; Sun 4:30, 7, 9:30

Mission Theater

1624 NW Glisan, 223-4527

Moonrise Kingdom Sat 2:30

KUNG FU THEATER ThE oNly KNoWN 35mm PriNT of

FIST OF THE

WHITE

LOTUS TuESday Nov. 13 · 7:30 pm

Safety Not Guaranteed Fri-Sun 4:30, 7, 9; Mon-Thurs 7, 9

Searching for Sugar Man Fri-Sun 4:45, 9:30; MonThurs 9:30

Trouble with the Curve Fri 7:15; Sat-Sun 1:45, 7:15; Mon-Thurs 7:15

Film Times are updated daily at

PORTLANDMERCURY.COM

See the Mercury movie section for showtimes, and visit our NEW website

w w w .H o l l y

w o o d T H e a T r e . org November 7, 2012 Portland Mercury 39

Savage Love

by Dan Savage

A Tidy Campsite

D

EAR READERS: I’m writing this week’s column in a drug-induced coma. Well, not quite a coma, but close. I was fighting a cold for two weeks, and the cold won: It morphed into an insanely painful sinus infection—you know it’s bad when your doctor urges you to err on the side of too much Vicodin, not too little. So a warning to everyone whose letter appears in this week’s column: My reliably sucky advice is probably going to be suckier than usual.

T

his probably falls into the category of a sowhat’s-the-problem problem: I’m a bearish 44-year-old who can’t get a hot Latin 18-year-old guy to stop sucking my dick. Craigslist was involved initially. But now he comes by for weekly sessions of mutual head and leaves immediately afterward. His round trip on the subway lasts longer than his stays at my place. He’s a sweet kid but deeply closeted; given what little I know of his Dominican family and group of friends, he’s years away from coming out. I’m under no illusion that I’m what he’s looking for, but I am an available sexual outlet. The trouble for me is he won’t kiss and won’t do anything social with me, and the novelty of getting naked with an 18-year-old has worn off. I could stop seeing him, I guess, but saying, “You give great head, but you bore me” is rude. I’m mindful of your rule about treating younger partners like campsites: Leave them in better shape than you found them. I’m doing that, by treating him respectfully and showing him that it’s possible to be openly gay and have support from family and friends, but I don’t know where to go next.

Not Wild About the Boy

D

on’t sell yourself short, NWATB: It’s possible that this 18-year-old is into you. He could be one of those younger guys who prefer older men, and bearish older guys could be his type. But the eat-and-run routine makes it somewhat likelier that you’re not, in fact, what he’s looking for, but all he feels he can safely get. You’re far enough away geographically, and far enough removed socially, that there’s no risk of exposure. He’s not going to run into you on the street when he’s walking around with his friends, and the odds that you know someone in common are nonexistent.

Anyway, here’s what you do: Tell him that he’s hot, tell him that he’s a good little cocksucker, but that’s not enough for you to sustain your interest. You’re not asking to meet his friends or family—you’re not asking him to risk exposure—but if he wants to keep blowing you, well, there’s going to be some getting to know you. He’ll have to risk a conversation now and then, maybe even watching a movie together sometime at your apartment. Tell him you can’t be friends-with-benefi ts with someone who isn’t a friend.

A lot of desperate-to-stay-closeted cases convince themselves that they won’t ever have to come out if they can get their sexual needs met in one place and their emotional needs met in another. By showing him that a healthy gay person successfully integrates his sexual and emotional needs—which you’ll have done whether he keeps coming over or not—you’ll be honoring the campsite rule.

I

’m a man who just got out of a two-year relationship with a great girl. She was always a little controlling, and I felt like I had to tiptoe around her all the time, so I’m glad to be out of the relationship. But I was still providing her with a lot of emotional support. This was fine until she started bothering me for advice

Sex

on what to do about her rebound relationship.

This seemed beyond the call of duty, and I suggested to her that we needed to reevaluate our boundaries. She flipped out and has threatened to force all our mutual friends to pick her over me. I’m also worried that she will tell everyone we know about my pegging kink. I’m comfortable with that aspect of myself, but other people don’t need to know. Do I stick up for kinks or deny it and blame a vengeful ex?

Kink-outing Is Not Kind

D

enying it won’t work if your vengeful ex has photos that she’s willing to deploy. So if there’s documentary evidence, KINK, prepare yourself to own your kink and laugh it off. Assholes and vengeful exes can only use the details of your turn-ons against you if you’re ashamed of them. If you don’t care who knows, KINK, or you can fake it, the people who know won’t care that they know, you know? Shrug off the reveal, laugh along with any good-natured ribbing.

I

know you were raised Catholic but are now an atheist. I’m curious if you might still believe in God if you took the time to expose yourself to other faith traditions that are more accepting of gay people. Have you looked at Buddhism or Hinduism? There is a great deal of evidence for reincarnation, and what better way to say “it gets better” than by saying you get to do it again and again until you get it right?

Born Again and Again

T

he Catholic Church’s stance on homosexuality gave me a big sad when I was an adolescent, it’s true, but I didn’t come to the conclusion that there is no God based solely on that big sad.

My sexuality prompted me to question not just the faith in N which I was raised, BAAA, TO EW N but all faiths. And none, in my E JO semi-informed opinion, stood up to scrutiny. I simply don’t know how any reasonable person can look at all world religions, living and dead, and come to the conclusion that one particular tribe or prophet or science-fi ction writer got it right and every other tribe, prophet, and science-fi ction writer got it wrong.

But if I was gonna pick a faith based on gayness alone, I would go with Antinous. He was the big gay lover of the big gay second-century Roman emperor Hadrian, the dude who built the wall that kept Mary Queen of Scots from sneaking into Roman Britain and stealing the scones of stones or something. Hadrian, a bearish guy in his 40s, was hopelessly in love with Antinous, a Bithynian teenager. Hadrian’s Bithynian, like the NWATB’s Dominican, must have given amazing head because after Antinous died—he drowned while swimming in the Nile—Hadrian had him declared a god. Take it away, Wikipedia: “The grief of the emperor knew no bounds, causing the most extravagant veneration to be paid to Antinous’ memory. Cities were founded in his name, medals struck with his likeness, and cities throughout the east commissioned godlike images of the dead youth for their shrines and sanctuaries… As a result, Antinous is one of the best-preserved faces from the ancient world.”

My husband Terry looks like Antinous—it’s true—so, yeah, I’d hit and/or worship that.

As for reincarnation, well, have you seen Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants? I wouldn’t mind coming back as that magical pair of pants—only, instead of being passed between best friends Lena, Tibby, Bridget, and Carmen, I’d like to be passed between Broadway stars Cheyenne, Andrew, Nick, and Kyle. And instead of being a pair of magical blue jeans, I’d like to be a magical dance belt. If there’s a religion that could make that happen for me, BAAA, sign my ass up. mail@savagelove.net @fakedansavage on Twitter

Find the Savage Lovecast at thestranger.com/savage.

40 Portland Mercury November 7, 2012

Comment on this story at portlandmercury.com

I❤ TV

TV

™

by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey

Browncoats Unite!

A

S I’VE SURELY mentioned, there’s only one sure cure for a raging hangover, and that’s (1) a meal made up of 93 percent pork fat, (2) an 83-ounce jug of Coca-Cola—of which 27 ounces are rum, (3) boisterous sex, and (4) an entire afternoon of watching multiple episodes of either Veronica Mars, classic Melrose Place, or Joss Whedon’s Firefly. IMPORTANT: Do not attempt to rise from the couch for anything other than boisterous sex. (The empty Coke cup is there for you to pee in.)

OH! Speaking of Firefly, did you know it celebrated its 10th anniversary this fall?

That’s right—10 years… which means you’re OLD. You’re older than Oldy McOlderson, the oldest old-timer at the Decrepit Octogenarian Geriatric Old Person’s Home for the Terminally OLD… which went out of business 50 years ago. That means you’re forgetful, and you need a quick reminder about this awesome show!

Created in 2002 by genius nerd Joss Whedon (Buffy the Vampire Slayer) for the Fox network, Firefly was a “western space opera” about a freedom fighter (Nathan Fillion as Captain Mal Reynolds) who winds up on the losing side of a civil war, and now scrapes by at the edge of the solar system on the “Firefly-class” spaceship Serenity, smuggling goods and transporting unseemly clients. He and his roughneck crew pick up a brother-and-sister team who are being pursued by the “Alliance”—a huge government entity who won the war, and therefore treat their citizenry like poop. The sister possesses uncanny psychic and fighting abilities (thanks to some creepy brain tinkering by the Alliance), which means the government wants her back… BAD… and Mal and the gang have to somehow make a living

JEREMY EATON

while staying one step ahead of those jerky governmental pee-holes.

While Whedon’s clever cross between Civil War history and Star Trek may have thrilled critics, the Fox execs were unsurprisingly baffled, and tried to force Whedon to make the malcontented Mal less “dour” while adding “larger-than-life characters”—this was, after all, the same year they debuted the grotesque reality show Joe Millionaire (BOOOOOO!!!). As you can probably guess, Firefly tanked, and aired only 11 of its 14 episodes before being cancelled. (In its defense, not a single new Fox show debuting in 2002 lasted longer than two seasons. HAW!! They’re the worst.)

However! Thanks to big DVD sales and huge support from fans (who call themselves “Browncoats” after the duster worn by Captain Mal), Whedon and Universal Pictures produced the entirely excellent 2005 Serenity feature film, which gave this “failed” show even more supporters to help celebrate Firefly’s 10th anniversary.

And what better way to party than with an all-day Firefly marathon (Science Channel, Sun Nov 11, starting at 7 am), followed by a roundtable reunion of the cast titled Firefly: Browncoats Unite (10 pm). SQUEEEEE!!! Expect tons of backstory, memories, and what the future may hold for one of the best sci-fi series EVAHHHH! Again… SQUEEEEE!!!

So, like, you better start drinking now. If you’re going to spend the entire day watching this on the couch, you’ll need one hell of a hangover. (And don’t forget your cup!)

I am the future of Twitter! @WmSteveHumphrey

This Week on Television WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 7 10:00 FX AMERICAN HORROR STORY A patient exposes creepy Doc Arden (who has the worst porn collection ever, BTW).

11:00 BRAVO LOLWORK Debut! A new reality show about an internet company that makes funny cat pictures. WOW. Now I will kill myself.

THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 8 9:30 NBC PARKS AND RECREATION Leslie becomes increasingly frantic upon meeting Ben’s parents—but they love her anyway.

(No, they don’t.)

10:00 FX IT’S ALWAYS SUNNY IN PHILADELPHIA The gang visits a psychiatrist, and guess what?

Diagnosis: abnormal!

FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 9 8:00 CW AMERICA’S NEXT TOP MODEL One of the models has a complete freakout while riding a horse, which is really the only reason to watch this show.

SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 10 10:00 TBS WEDDING BAND Debut! Brian Austin Green (Beverly Hills, 90210) stars as the aging leader of a wedding

band in this new cable sitcom.

11:30 NBC SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE Host: Anne Hathaway (snore). Musical guest: Rihanna (hot!).

SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 11 9:00 AMC THE WALKING DEAD The governor throws a surprise party for the people of Woodbury, and surprise! Somebody will die.

10:00 SCI FIREFLY: BROWNCOATS UNITE The original Firefly cast reunites and reminisces about one of the greatest sci-fi shows EVARRRR! MONDAY, NOVEMBER 12 11:00 MTV CATFISH: THE TV SHOW Debut! Somewhat based on the film; real-life internet daters meet each other to find out if everything will go horribly awry.

11:00 VH1 STORYTELLERS Featuring the fantastic Alicia Keys, sharing the stories behind her songs.

TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 13 9:00 ABC HAPPY ENDINGS Max discovers he is AWESOME at hosting Bar Mitzvahs—which is exactly when everything turns less than kosher.

Comment on this story at portlandmercury.com

November 7, 2012 Portland Mercury 41

Portland

503.299.9911 Salem

503.689.8080

FREE to listen & reply to ads!

FREE CODE: Portland Mercury For other local numbers call:

1-888-MegaMatesTM

24/7 Customer Care 1(888) 634.2628 18+ ©2012 PC LLC 2349

WHY WAIT – Hookup TONIGHT! FREE TO TRY UNLIMITED VIP MEMERSHIP $19 FOR 1 WEEK Always FREE TO CHAT WITH VIP MEMBERS

503-222-CHAT VANCOUVER 360-696-5253 EVERETT 425-405-CHAT TACOMA 253-359-CHAT SEATTLE 206-753-CHAT BOISE 208-350-2500 STRAIGHT/GAY/BI

www.LiveMatch.com

portlandmercury.com/hump

Photo by Michael J Demeo

Tickets now on sale! 11/8 — 11/11 at Cinema 21 616 NW 21st Ave • 21+ all shows except Sun 11/11 4:30 PM now 18+ 42 Portland Mercury November 7, 2012

Gossip

News

Feature

IDIOT BOX // MATT BORS

Picks

Music

Arts

Food

Fashion

Film

TV

Sex

Fun

Matt Bors is a Portland-based political cartoonist; view his work at mattbors.com

I

MAAKIES // TONY MILLIONAIRE

Tony Millionaire’s work is published by Dark Horse Comics and online at maakies.com

DINOSAUR COMICS // RYAN NORTH

by Ian Karmel

BELIEVE it was legendary Algonquin Round Table fixture Dorothy Parker who once penned, “I need a hero, I’m holding out for a hero ’til the end of the night.”

It’s with that delectable bon mot in heart, head, wang, and spiritual vagina (which I believe all men secretly possess) that I suggest we reconsider whom we identify as “heroes” in our society.

For example: the person who works the graveyard shift at your local mini-mart. Yes. Nobody should have to go through the shit they go through so you can buy Swedish Fish and condoms (put the Swedish Fish in the condoms for a fun no-calorie snack!) at 3 am—but they totally do, every night. Who do you think spends more time with the worst people in the world: the most selfless, hard-working social worker on the planet, or Dave, who’s pulling the 10 pm-6 am shift at the Plaid Pantry down the street from your house? You know, deep down in your spiritual vagina, that it’s Dave. (I picked a gender-neutral name on purpose because IAN KARMEL GETS IT, LADIES.) Sure, there are other heroes as well: cops, firefighters, teachers, military personnel, astronauts, sandwiches. (Yeah, that’s a joke about a type of sandwich called the “hero”—want to fight about it? But it’s also exactly how I feel about sandwiches. Be real, when was the last time a cop actually helped you? Okay, now when was the last time a sandwich helped you? Sandwiches/Biden 2012.

Also, please know I went with this joke instead of one about the TV show Heroes, so COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS AND HIS MYSTERIOUS WIFE, THE COUNTESS YOUR BLESSINGS.) I’m not here to quibble with that list—yeah,

some cops are total barf-wagons who abuse their power and some teachers are riding out the job market until the need for comparative literature majors skyrockets… but let’s not throw the baby out with the bathwater. Also, use the drain in your bathtub instead of throwing out bathwater.

What I’m here to do is suggest adding convenience store employees to the “hero list”… and chew gum. (Oh man, this gum is delicious. So minty, and yet with a smack of ham.)

How can anything seem normal once you’ve worked a graveyard shift at one of those places? How many times can a seemingly harmless person try to pay for a bottle of wine with a handful of dead moths before you stop trusting EVERYBODY? And how do we repay these heroes? Scorn unfettered! When you see a teacher or a cop in a movie, they’re played by Ryan Gosling or Mariska Hargitay. (Say her name out loud. It’s a blast.) When you see a convenience store worker in a movie, they’re played by me. If you bring home a date, and they’re in the military, your parents will admire your date’s commitment amid constant travail. If you bring home someone who humps the midnight shift at 7-Eleven, your parents will hide their prescription painkillers.

No longer! Let us hoist these selfless few on our shoulders. Let us celebrate those who forgo sanity and decent wages so we can get all hammered and buy a terrible, terrible sandwich at 3:30 am.

Let us now appreciate all the Daves, for I believe it was Dorothy Parker who once famously quipped, “I’m not sure how to end this article, but people who work the graveyard shift at convenience stores are pretty dope.”

Ryan North has daily comics available at qwantz.com

YOUR ANONYMOUS RANTS FROM THE MERCURY ’S I, ANONYMOUS BLOG ILLUSTRATED BY KALAH ALLEN

FECES: FOR A BRIGHTER, WHITER SMILE! Dear Annoying Roommate: I see that you have placed your toothbrush in a mug and then placed that mug on the back of the toilet seat. While I find this an interesting, if not vile, choice, it is not one I will argue with. There are so many annoying things you do, like smack your lips like a goddamn eight-year-old when you eat, steal my beer, and put YOUR fucking underwear on the same goddamn rack as MY hand towel (which forced a rewash).

You then proceed to call me out for leaving a dish in the sink? Therefore, I will not remind you that when we take a poo and flush the toilet, a cloud of fecal particles fills the air, contaminating everything nearby. I will not point out that your toothbrush is at the very epicenter of the shit cloud, getting covered in all manner of fecal particles and bacteria—and thus when you brush you are literally smearing shit all over your mouth and teeth.

And while I will not point out the stupidity of your disgusting decision, I have to ask: HOW’S MY SHIT TASTE BITCH!?—Anonymous

UNDERWORLD // KAZ

Kaz's work is published by Fantagraphics; view his work at kazunderworld.com

Submit your unsigned confessions and accusations of 300 words or less, changing the names of the innocent and guilty, to “I, Anonymous,” at anonymous@portlandmercury.com, or on the I, Anonymous blog at portlandmercury.com.

November 7, 2012 Portland Mercury 43

The Portland Mercury BULLETIN BOARD online > > > www.portlandmercury.com/backpage (503) 294-0840

BANKRUPTCY - Stop Creditors

Revived Cellular & Technology

SALVIA AND KRATOM!

Monday-Friday 10:30 - 7:00, Saturday 11:00 - 5:00 7816 N Interstate Ave - near Fred Meyer 503-286-1527

FREE Consultation. PAYMENT PLANS. Scott Hutchinson, Atty. Since 1997.

Experienced Debt Relief Agency.

CALL (503) 808-9032 www.Hutchinson-Law.com Quick Fix Synthetic Urine now available.

Your hookah headquarters. Glass pipes, discount tobacco, detox products & vaporizers.

Still Smokin’ Tobacco For Less 12302 SE Powell 503-762-4219

Help Wanted at Revived Cellular 7816 N Interstate Ave

Part-time technician and part-time customer service representative positions available. If interested call the store at 503-286-1527

Area 69

7720 SE 82nd Ave Adult Movies, Video Arcade and PIPES! New Variety of Kratom pills!

503-774-5544

Junk Cars Wanted Quick Cash

Ask for Jake (503) 936-5923

House Of Pipes Glass and Tobacco

925 NE Broadway 1009 Mollalla Ave Portland, OR Oregon City Glass Pipes, Tobacco, Kratom

Oregon Wage Claim Attorneys Helping Oregon employees collect their wages and penalties!

Free Consultation

Schuck Law (503) 974-6142 / (360) 566-9243 http://wageclaim.org

Poppi’s Pipes

1712 E. Burnside Pipes, Detox, Scales, Hookah, Shisha New Kratom New Store Hours Mon - Sat 10 am - 9 pm!

503-206-7731

Poppis pipes NEW LOCATION NOW OPEN 3619 SE division 971-229-1760 Come in for a Free gift and Medible for OMMP! Professional MANSCAPING 503-841-0385

Bodyhair grooming for guys by guy in NoPo. PDXadult.com

SELL US YOUR USED CELL PHONES

SMOKE SIGNALS ON SANDY Vaporizers, hookahs, glass pipes, tobacco, gift items

3554 NE SANDY BLVD. 503-235-0504

SMOKING POT?

Wanna Stop? Marijuana Anonymous can help. www.madistrict11.org. 503-221-7007

Blackfern Surfboards

Custom Boards and Ding Repair www.blackfernsurf.com 360-391-4845

TOBACCO FOR LESS INC

KRATOM, VAPORIZERS, PIPES, HOOKAHS GOOGLE TO SEE INSIDE STORE 4071 NE SANDY BLVD 503-327-8276

Tokens

Smoke Shop

Glass & Cheap Smokes 1971 W Burnside 503-206-7353

VAPORIZED Smoke Shop

Open 11-9 Mon-Sat, 12-5 Sun 8778 NE Sandy Blvd

Vasectomy * Essure Lovejoy Surgicenter 503-221-1870

CLASSES & EVENTS HOST YOUR EVENT HERE!!

BOSSANOVA BALLROOM 722 E Burnside 503 206 7630 Bossanovaballroom.com BRAZILIAN JIU JITSU Learn ground defense skills under black belt instruction Info @ nwfighting.com. 503-740-2666

Improv, Standup at the Brody Learn spontaneous theater, comedy from the specialists.

For 15 years, offering qualified instruction, supportive environment.

503-224-2227 www.brodytheater.com

Tai Chi Classes

Enhance awareness via moving meditation nwfighing.com or call 503-740-2666

www.mellowmood.com ll d

4119 SE Hawthorn Hawthorne,, Portland ph: 503-235-PIPE (7473 (7473)

drink 639 SE Morrison star-bar-rocks.com