2009 POWER MAGAZINE

SPOTLIGHT TECHNOLOGY -MAKING MONEY WITH VOIP

SONAL DEVELOPMENT

DEC/JAN 2008

JHONKANKUS THE 300 YEAR

NEW YEAR

NEW BEGINNINGAS-

write your own ending

BELIEVE IN

YOURSELF TAKE RISKS

LIVE EACH DAY

AS IF IT IS YOUR LAST

OLD FIRST BLACK

CHRISTMAS

FINDING THE

JOY WITHIN “You are worried and upset

about many things, but only one thing is needed.”

Luke 10: 41-42

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12MERRY CHRISTMAS

Finding The Joy Within. “You are worried

and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed.” Luke 10: 41-42

22 Johnkankus. The 300 year First African

American Christmas Tradition.

26 RELATIONSHIPS

Hammering It Home. I’ts widely

recognized that boys benefit from having dads around as role models and teachers about manhood, but does having a father at home make much difference for girls?

32 Real Family Values. Politicians use it

to help portray themselves as upstanding citizens who want the best for our families, while news reporters use it to explain the cause of society’s ills. There is, however, no greater authority on family values than the one who created the family - GOD.

36 Memories. As I observe how families

talk about and share their early family memories, it is clear that your childhood memories—the words you use to describe them and the feelings you attach to them— say volumes about who you are and how you live today.

40 Q&A With Dr. Tim Gardner. How

should I handle peer pressure from friends who don’t understand not having sex until marriage?

SPIRITUAL The Ultimate Comparison Of The Wild And The Wise. Then I saw that

42

wisdom excels folly as light excels darkness;

P R AY E R

50 Our Day Of Rest Can’t Get A Rest.

It is amazing the number of secondary issues that divide believers.

54 PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT

Life Is A Theatre Invite Your Audience Wisely.

56 Believe in yourself. Take risks.

Live each day as if it’s your last!!! It

has been said many times, in order to be great, you have to be good. In order to be good, you have to be bad and before you can be bad, you have to get started.

62 COVER STORY

Alek Wek. Elle magazine took a risk

when they selected to feature the inky colored, African girl from Sudan on their cover.

70 PEOPLE

Who Is Thierry Baptiste. The

forerunner of natural hair care, color, and style.

+

OWER O B ED I E N C E

+ WO R SH I P

+ ED I F I C AT I O N

74 HEALTH

Everyday Wellness. The Healing Laughter

76 P.O.W.E.R. Raises It’s Voice In The Fight Against Cervical Cancer.

78 HOUSE & HOME

Inspirations And Creativity. Are you

seeking to inspire, enlighten, and empower your children, family or friends by filling their homes with a design that is uplifting?

82 Erick Brown’s - Ebhome. His global

perspective combined with his love of elegance and comfort has made him one of the most revered African-American designers in the industry.

90 FINANCE

Obedience Is Better Than Sacrifice. Take

back control over your finances with these helpful tips on how to reduce your credit card debt.

+

R EB I R T H

96 Peaceful Money Management For Couples.

Regardless of how much or how little people have, money management is the most common cause of dissension in relationships.

98 Confronted By Reality. Gripped by

Gambling

100 TRAVELSCAPE

Indonesia. a monumental resort fashioned

out of limestone and takes its inspiration from the surrounding culture of Central Java.

CAREER New Year New Beginning Write your own ending.

108

SPOTLIGHT Technology. Making money with

112

VOIP.

116 SOULFOOD

Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. I have a dream.

122 Mouths Of Babes.

Whatʼs Holding You Back?

Iʼm too old. I donʼt have enough money.

Iʼve never done that before. Itʼs just too complicated. I donʼt see how it will work.

What if I fail?

Excuses! Excuses! They inhibit our goals, obstruct our ambitions, and keep us from living our dreams. Whatʼs your excuse du jour? Is it one of the ones I mentioned above or do you have your own particular little dream snatcher? Perhaps, like me, you have them in rotation so you can readily pull out the one most appropriate to your current circumstances.

A dear friend helped me to put my excuses into proper perspective a few years ago during a conversation we were having about my desire to further my education. I was explaining to her that graduate school was

just not an option for me because I didnʼt have the money to pay for it and didnʼt want to take on a lot of debt in order to fund my education. Do you know what my friend had the nerve to ask me? “Nicole, do you think you might be limiting God in what He wants to do in your life with your excuses?”

Well, I never! What nerve! What audacity!

What… a revelation! My friendʼs question was so poignant because it caused me to take the focus off of my resources and abilities and place it on God and His limitless ones.

Well, I applied to graduate school and was accepted. I am now in the final year of my program which, I might add, has been funded through a fellowship. I give God the praise not just for this particular blessing, but the principle behind it. His Word is true. God is, indeed, able to do “immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine” (Ephesians 3:20), but oftentimes our lack of faith gets in the way.

So what about you? Whatʼs holding you back? Godʼs Word is just as true for you as it is for me. I hope youʼll ditch your excuses and allow God the opportunity to demonstrate His power and providence in your life.

Iʼve recently been presented with the opportunity to finish my last semester studying abroad in Italy. Even though I could list a boat load of excuses (the first five of them being financial) for why this just isnʼt practicable, I choose to thank God for the opportunity and trust Him to handle the details. And I canʼt wait to share my praise report with you. Ciao!

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yourfeedback

I finally had a moment to read the Iyanla article and though she is *by far not my favorite person in the world*, I was very, very disappointed in the journalist who wrote the

article (actually, this came as a surprise to me as everything else I read in the magazine was stellar). My “sister under attack” radar got going on this one. I thought the article wreaked of yellow journalism and over-thetop partiality.

How a professional writer can use the Bible to prove that a non-Christian faith is nonChristian is way beyond my comprehension.

I have many friends who practice the Yoruba faith and though I personally believe it’s hocus pocus, I would never deign to use a

book they don’t believe in to challenge their beliefs - isn’t that an oxymoron? I think a more thought provoking way of directing the

article would be to talk about how Christians

are following this non-Christian “lifestyle” guru.

The writer could have even compared her belief system to the Christian belief system - in a less inflammatory, but more investigative way. But calling her the devil, that is best left to God and his infinite wisdom on her judgment day. The Bible is a

beautiful guide book for Christians and the Christian way of life, not a billy club to be used to beat up on those who do not believe in it... That article reminded me once again of why I don’t read the Enquirer (Is that where the writer came from? Just joking, sort of.) That’s my 2 cents.

Denise, New York

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S H A W - P E R R Y ,

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P O W E R M AG A Z I N E D EC E M B E R 20 07

C H E S

JoyWithin Finding the

“You are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed.”

Luke 10: 41-42

O

ften, I feel like I’m hauling rocks— overburdened, overworked, and overwhelmed. What started out as a joy became a drudgery, and I wanted to give up. Many of you may feel this way as you journey through this thing called life. We knew the journey would be riddled with trials, tribulations, joy, pain, and long suffering. Yet, we are never prepared when we get run over by a few trucks. We can choose to lay there or get up, dust ourselves off, and keep moving toward the finish line. His grace and mercy are sufficient to guide us over the rough spots, the danger signs, and the detours in life.

The Word reminds us that “Joy will come in the morning.”

JANUARY 2008

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As we enter the holiday season, we have much to celebrate! But in our celebration, we often add yet another rock to our overloaded wagon. The beautiful Christmas colors, the scents, scenery, and gifts serve as reminders that we are expected to be joyful, but then we begin to engage in behaviors that may not reflect the joy that should be within us 365 days of the year. The frantic shopping for gifts, decorating the house, cooking for family and friends, shopping for clothes, buying

• • • • •

the gifts I need to buy?

When will I have time to clean and decorate the house for Christmas?

How can I be joyful when the most significant person in my life has died?

How can I be joyful when I am behind the prison walls?

What can I do to make someone happy---when I don’t even have a job?

I have an addiction…what do I have to be joyful about?

WHAT DO I HAVE TO BE JOYFUL If we abide in Him we can give ABOUT? and receive the joy that After I had spent the last 17 no gift years exhausting myself to create exchange required. the “joy of Christmas” for my family and friends, the light toys for the kids, spending money bulb finally went off. A year ago in that many of us really don’t have to December, several days before my spare, increasing our credit card debt. daughter’s 18th birthday, my husband All of these behaviors are enough to whispered in my ear, “Why do you make anyone anxious, depressed, and continue to do all this stuff preparing less than happy with our life journey for Christmas? You are so exhausted on and all the things that associated with Christmas day that all you want to do Christmas. is sleep.” It was at that moment that I As you begin to read this issue of realized that the season of joy should POWER Magazine, you may be be an outward expression of the joy wondering: • How will I find the money to pay for that is within me. This joy is within me

, only He can give unconditionally...

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365 days a year, and this world cannot take it away. It is a joy that is the result of my living room intimacy with our Father, a joy that only He can give and no one can take away, not death, sickness, destruction, or the loss of job, family, or friends. If we abide in Him, we can give and receive the joy that only He can give unconditionally…no gift exchange is required.

Quite frankly, nothing is harder to bear than a burden we’re not called to carry. While God does ask us to bear one another’s burden, He has not asked us to step in and do what people are not willing to do themselves. And while there are many needs, God has not asked us to meet every one. You cannot meet everyone’s needs this holiday season. You are not called to create unnecessary credit card debt to show love. You are not called to collapse in exhaustion or to become depressed about the season.

Think about the Biblical account of the day Jesus visited the sisters, Martha and Mary. The day was probably busier than usual. Why? Because the Feast of Tabernacles was near, and the house was filled with cooking and much

activity. So when Martha invited Jesus and his disciples to stay at her home on their way to Jerusalem, and they accepted her kind hospitality--Martha continued with her expected tasks (cooking, cleaning, decorating, etc). Martha wanted to make everything comfortable so everyone could worship. Does this sound familiar to you? Martha showed her devotion by giving the gift she knew best---the gift of service. Mary, on the other hand, decided to sit at Jesus’ feet and listen, to praise, worship, and adore Him. Mary engaged in living room intimacy with Jesus and derived such joy and peace from His presence.

So what about Martha? Well, even welcoming agendas (hospitality) grow heavy as Martha quickly discovered.

She became frustrated and felt that it was unfair that Mary was seated at Jesus’ feet while she scurried about.

“LORD DON’T YOU CARE?” Martha was distracted by all the preparation that had to be done. She went to Him and asked, “Lord don’t you care that my sister has left me to do all the work by myself? Tell her to

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help me!” Luke 10:40.

The problem is obvious: Martha was doing all the work while Mary basked in all the glory. Help is what we all want when we’re feeling overwhelmed: soft, soothing words and plenty of helpful action. We want everyone to carry his/her own weight. But most of all, we want life to be fair. As you enter this joyous Christmas season to celebrate the birth of our Lord and Savior, be reminded of Jesus’ response to Martha,“…you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed.” Luke 10:41- 42.

DUMPING ROCKS Why not get rid of some of those rocks this holiday season? He knows if we’re overly worried and bogged down by duties (shopping, baking, gift wrapping, caring for a sick loved one, grieving the loss of someone or something) so chances are good our hearts will not hear the Savior’s call to come and sit at His feet. Know that when you are distracted by the circumstances of life, discouraged, tired, and overwhelmed, there is no better place to go than to our Father.

He alone is all we need.

THE CURE “You are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed.”

Luke 10:41-42 Perhaps Jesus was issuing two invitations: • First to know Him—to put worship before work • Not to overdo it—even in our effort to convey love and serve others.

The Mind, Body, Spirit Connection begins with this confession: I cannot meet every need, but I can respond in obedience to the need the Spirit lays on my heart I cannot carry every load, but I can carry the load God has for me For his yoke, indeed is easy, and his burden truly light!!

The POWER Magazine family would like to suggest that you take a deep breath, relax, and know that the real meaning of Christmas is CHRIST!

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gift guide

Johnkankus

THE 300 YEAR OLD FIRST BLACK CHRISTMAS TRADITION

T

he dancers wore rattles

tied to their legs and wrists.

They had cow tails tied to the rumps and add such other odd things to their bodies in several places.

If that description makes you think of Halloween, The Mummers Parade in Philadelphia or Mardi Gras, get ready for a surprise. Those words are from a letter written in 1688 by Sir Hans Sloan describing a Black Christmas celebration he saw. The Johnkankus celebration, as it’s known in the US or its more popular name Jonkonnu, reaches back more than 300 years into North American history, and is still celebrated worldwide--from the rainforests of Brazil and the island of Bermuda to the beaches of Jamaica.

Kwanzaa, an African-American Christmas celebration, developed in 1966 because of the belief that there was no Black Christmas celebration has a great, great, great grandfather in the Johnkankus. Africans wherever they were taken in the new world recreated their culture.

They recreated Africa in many ways but certainly in the tradition of the Johnkankus Masquerade Festival. All those stories about Africans being so beaten and broken down by the middle passage and slavery they forgot who they were are simply wrong.

The African roots of the Johnkankus/ Jonkonnu are clear. In Voyage to Guinea, Brazil and the West-Indies by C. Ward and R. Chandler published in 1735 there is a description of a celebration observed in the kingdom of John Conny, a renowned King or cabocero of the time. That kingdom of John Conny is now part of present day Ghana, Tres Puntas, in Axim on the Guiney coast. On Christmas Day in the 1800s troupes of up to 100 Johnkankus revelers paraded through Wilmington, North Carolina.

Costumed dancers, musicians, bell ringers, Gombe/Gumba players

[Gombe is a Ghanaian word for drum] in their distinctive, getup, creative arrangements of rags and tatters roused the sky. Their instruments of animal bones, sticks, reeds, bells, cow horns and triangles rang loud and clear. The entire community Blacks, Whites, young and old joined in the fun, dancing in the streets.

Today when global warming looms as a major threat to the entire world, we need to remember the valuable lessons

Recycle

Rejoice of the African-American tradition of The Johnkankus. Those first Africans made trash a tradition by recycling, reusing, and being creative. The Johnkankus festivals, hats, costumes, masks, instruments, et al, were completely created out of found objects, rags, tatters, recycled materials, and genius.

They included the entire community in their celebration: Black, Whites, young and old. The recent African-

American Christmas tradition of Kwanzaa represents America reaching toward Africa while the Johnkankus/Jonkonnu represents Africa reaching toward America. Saving the planet is something for which we all must work together and play a part. And letâ€TMs not forget the joy those first Africans passed down to us in the festivals of The Johnkankus and Jonkonnu. Its always good to get your dance on. For further research see www.irenesmalls.com Black History Resources

by Irene Smalls Photo Credit Bermuda Dept. of Tourism

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Daughters Hammering It Home

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IT’S WIDELY RECOGNIZED THAT BOYS BENEFIT FROM HAVING DADS AROUND AS ROLE MODELS AND TEACHERS ABOUT MANHOOD. BUT DOES HAVING A FATHER AT HOME MAKE MUCH DIFFERENCE FOR GIRLS?

B

lue Car, the Miramax film released in April 2003, ran just 86 minutes but had some parents on the edge of their seats the entire time. Agnes Bruckner, 16, portrayed Meg Denning, the older daughter in a divorced family. She was a gifted poet who’s yearning for her absent dad surfaced in spare, exquisite verse that caught the eye of Mr. Auster, her high school English teacher. He mentors Meg and sparks improvement in her writing, and he seems to give her the fatherly attention she craves.

But Auster is not her dad; he finds it impossible to resist the girl’s budding sexuality and ends up taking advantage of her.

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Florence Bienenfeld, author of My Mom and Dad Are Getting A Divorce and Helping Your Child Through Your Divorce. Sometimes mothers are so angry at their ex-husbands that they don’t want their kids to have contact with them, Bienenfeld says.

“A dad is a girls first love object,...” and Compared with daughters from twoparent homes, a girl is about five times more likely to have had sex by age 16 if her dad left before she was 6 and twice as likely if she stops living with her dad at 6 or older.

she believes if she has worth then

Moncrief recalls feeling “that I’d be betraying my mom if I saw my father.” In the film, Meg bitterly tells her mother: “He doesn’t come around because of you.”

Her dad hasn’t paid child support, and the mother is furious. Dads are far more likely to pay support if they get to see their children, studies show.

her daddy would want to see her.

The study of 762 girls for 13 years took into account many factors that could lead to early sex, says Duke University psychologist Kenneth Dodge, the study’s co-author. Still, there was an independent link between teenage sex and girls not living with their biological fathers.

THE IDEALIZED DAD Girls who see their fathers often tend to realize that dads have warts, says San Diego psychologist Constance Ahrons, author of The Good Divorce.

But a daughter isolated from her father “may idealize him and yearn for tenderness and attention.

A dad is a girl’s first love object, “and she’s likely to believe if she was worth loving and worthwhile, then her daddy would want to see her,” says Los Angeles marriage and family therapist 28

P O W E R M AG A Z I N E D EC E M B E R 20 07

GENDER-SPECIFIC ROLES In research on parenting, dads have been found to play some important roles. For example, fathers do more rough-and-tumble play than mothers and are more likely to encourage physical risk-taking. Also, youngsters with active, involved fathers tend to get higher grades than classmates whose fathers are rarely around.

Studies of high-achieving women suggest that they have been especially close to their dads. Although there are no national figures on children’s

www.DollsLikeMe.com

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contact with dads after divorce, custody plans are increasingly flexible, Ahrons says.

Amanda Barrett, 24, felt relief after her

parents divorced 18 years ago because they stopped fighting. They decided to share custody. My dad has a lot of respect for me and for women, and I expect men to respect me,” says Barrett, a singer in Los Angeles.

In Blue Car, the outcome is mixed. Meg’s younger sister, Lily, develops mental illness, and her story ends tragically.

But Meg’s brutal sexual encounter with the idolized Mr. Auster propels her back into contact with her real dad. A hapless lip-biter who often can’t think of what to say, he loves his girls nonetheless.

Meg decides to go live with him.

“I know he’s not perfect,” she tells her mother, “but I need him, too.”

DADs Quiz

HOW WELL AM I DOING AS MY DAUGHTER’S FATHER? HERE IS A SHORT DADS & DAUGHTERS SELF-ASSESSMENT QUIZ. CLICK HERE TO TAKE ONLINE QUIZ IT WILL CALCULATE YOUR SCORE. http://www.dadsanddaughters.org/free-resources/DADs-Quiz.aspx

1. I can name her 3 best friends: 2. I know my daughter’s goals: 3. I comment on my wife/partner’s weight: 4. I’m physically active with my daughter (jog, etc.): 5. I make dinner for my family: 6. I talk to my daughter about managing money: 7. I spend 1/2 hour, 1-on-1with her, doing something we both enjoy: 8. I talk to other fathers about raising kids: 9. I talk to other fathers about raising daughters: 10. I restrict her activities more than I do/ would for a son: 11. I talk to my daughter about advertising: 12. I tell my daughter what her strengths are: 13. I comment on my daughter’s weight: 14. I know what school project she’s working on: 15. I protest negative media portrayals of girls: 16. I view pornographic material: 17. I participate in parenting organizations: 18. I yell at my daughter’s mother: 19. I suggest that my daughter go on a diet: 20. I object when others suggest that she go on a diet:

21. I converse with my daughter, and she does most of the talking: 22. I know what my daughter is concerned about today: 23. I know how many student government officers at her school are girls: 24. I have read her school’s sexual harassment policy: 25. I help boys learn to respect girls and vice versa: 26. I tell my daughter stories about my own youth: 27. I initiate contact with her at least 5 times a week: 28. I ask how she feels transitioning to and from my home: 29. I demonstrate respect for her mother and stepparent(s): 30. I fulfill my visitation and support commitments: 31. I volunteer to help with her extracurricular activities: 32. I take my daughter to school: 33. I visit my daughter’s school during the school day: 34. I take my daughter to work with me:

Real Family

FAMILY VALUES

IS A WIDELY USED TERM IN TODAY’S SOCIETY.

Politicians use it to help portray themselves as upstanding citizens who want the best for our families, while news reporters use it to explain the cause of society’s ills. There is, however, no greater authority on family values than the one who created the family - GOD. by Shirley Alexander.

It was in the Garden of Eden that God, Himself, planned the institution of marriage.

Genesis 2:18 says, “And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone: I will make an help meet for him.” God’s intentions for the marriage and family are ones of love, companionship, support, provision, and care. However, much too often few if any of these qualities are present in the modern family. Could it be that we need to return to the family values that the designer of the first family had in mind?

FOUR BASIC RELATIONSHIPS. The apostle Paul outlines the four basic family relationships and the values that must accompany those relationships if the family is to resemble the God family intended. The 5th and 6th chapters of Ephesians provides the foundation for real family values.

(1) “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord” (2) “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her.”

(3) “Children obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.” .

(4) “And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.”

SUBMISSION. The cornerstone for harmony in the home is individual submission to Christ and to

one another. Often the word submission is frowned upon by many because it is seen as a cultural principle rather than a timeless biblical truth. To understand the Christian concept of submission, it is first helpful to understand what it does not mean.

DOES NOT MEAN? Submission does not mean that men are superior to women. Christianity is the one faith that elevates the position of women and praises their worth. Submission does not mean a slavish mind set, where a woman becomes nothing more than a doormat— and a husband an autocratic dictator.

SUBMISSION MEANS? Submission is an ongoing lifestyle where the wife voluntarily yields to her husband’s God-given headship. An amplified version of Ephesians 5:33 would read, “And let the wife see that she respects her husband—that she notices him, regards him, honors him, prefers him, venerates and esteems him; and that she defers to him, and praises him, and loves and admires him exceedingly.

TREATMENT OF THE WIFE. Another real family value can be seen in how the husband treats his wife. A husband is to love his wife with agape love—God’s kind of love as demonstrated to the world in the gift of His only Son. That kind of love is sacrificial love that is willing to deny himself for the protection and provision of his wife.

It is love that is willing to give his wife tender but wise direction in her life so that she experiences the blessings of God. It is a love that values his wife as a woman of great worth, a person to be cherished above

every other woman. When a woman feels truly loved, treasured, cherished, and valued, she is content and fulfilled. Much too often, many men feel that giving their wives materials goods will meet all her needs—but material things can never meet her need for emotional security which comes through sacrificial love.

HUSBAND/SERVANT? A husband’s love is servant-oriented. It is so easy for a husband to make demands of his wife. The real family value is when he becomes a willing servant to his wife.

Remember, Christ, the King of kings, did not consider Himself too lofty that he could not demonstrate an attitude of servanthood by washing His disciple’s feet. Indeed, His main purpose for coming to earth was to serve as a ransom for many. Therefore, according to Christ’s example, headship in the scriptures means servanthood—not dictatorship!

OBEDIENCE. Another real family value is the obedience of children to their parents. God commands obedience in this area because He knows that if a child is consistently rebellious toward his parents, he is likely to disobey in other areas. Even if parents are wrong—and all are, at times—God, still asks the child to obey, knowing that He is able to work all things together for good to those who trust Him. The last real family value is the loving care that fathers and mothers give their children. Unfortunately, far to many parents are too busy amassing fortune and fame to adequately meet the emotional needs

of their children. Children of all ages, but particularly small children need their parents love, time, and attention. We must learn to consider our children’s desires, thoughts, and tastes and when appropriate, allow them the privilege of making choices.

Parent’s time is one of the most important tools a child needs to grow, develop, and mature. As parents, we can play with our children, work on projects together, have family devotion time together, and teach them the word of God.

Real family values are those based on the word of God. Let’s consider these values above all others and put them into practice in our lives and in our homes.

Mem S H I R L E Y

A L E X A N D E R

One of the surest ways to get a family engaged and talking is to pull out the family picture album. Naturally what will follow is the children teasing their parents about their hairstyles, their outdated clothing, and of course their smaller waistlines. The siblings will then start on one another with barbs and jabs about how often the same green dress was worn by all the girls in the family—often naming certain garments as a hand-medown to the 3rd degree. Of course no family album would be complete without pictures of special occasions in a family. Photographs taken on Christmas, birthdays, graduations, vacations, moves to new homes are sure to get each member of the family talking and telling the story about that particular occasion from their perspective.

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I remember being a part of another familyʼs get together and of course the family picture album surfaced. I was amazed when the adult daughter of my friend said to me, “There I am sitting on mamaʼs lap. She was expecting my brother. Even back then, he was pushing me out of the way.”

Knowing something about my friendʼs family, I knew that the young woman, now in her late twenties, had always thought that her younger brother had overshadowed her.

As I observe how families talk about and share their early family memories, it is clear that your childhood memories—the words you use to describe them and the feelings

mories perceptions of our past

you attach to them—say volumes about who you are and how you live today. A number of child psychologists agree that your basic personality, your personal life philosophy, your outlook on life is greatly influenced by what you perceived happened to you as a child. You noticed that I did not say that “what happened to you,” but what you perceived happened to you.

If I were to ask you to remember some of your earliest childhood occurrences could you do it? Can you remember an early birthday party? Can you recall any of your teachers when you were young, especially in kindergarten or first or second grade?

Did you get along with them? Or did you have problems? What kind of vacations did your family take? What about Christmas?

Can you remember a special Christmas?

What made it special?

Who was there? What did your family do for fun?

Did your parents read you bedtime stories?

If you will allow yourself to ponder some of these questions, you might discover

a great deal about yourself.

The memories we carry from childhood can greatly affect how we live our lives today.

Sue Orman in her book The 9 Steps to Financial Freedom has an entire chapter called Seeing How Your Past Holds the Key to Your Financial Future.

In this chapter she writes, “The road to financial freedom begins not in a bank or even in a financial planner office like mine, but in you head. It begins with your thoughts And those thoughts, more often than not, stem from our seemingly forgotten past with money. Iʼll go so far as to say that in my experience, not of my clientsʼ biggest problems in life today— even those that appear on the surface not to be money related---are directly connected with their early, formative J JAANNUUAARRYY 22000048 PPOOW WEERR M MAAGGAAZZIIN NEE

37

experience with money.”

As I listen to adults talk about their childhood far too many share memories of pain, rejection, despair, humiliation, and grief. Many can never experience the joy and contentment of today because they continue to allow themselves to be held hostage by their perceptions of past memories. But there is a way to overcome the memory ghosts of the past and to learn to live in the joy of the present Number one, accept the fact that your memories—or more accurately your perceptions of your memories – may not be based on reality, but on the interpretation you made when you were very young. I Corinthians 13:11 admonishes us, “When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child.

When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.” During our early school years, classmates teased and taunted us about some physical appearance that may have resulted in having low self-esteem. As a child, we just knew that these self-proclaimed anatomy experts were 100% correct in their assessments.

We never stopped to analyze that they were so afraid of getting teased themselves that they got their digs in first to deflect from their own flaws.

Number two, believe the truth instead of the false perceptions formed from childhood.

John 8:32 says, “You shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free.” It is time to believe the truth, rather than those lingering

perceptions from childhood. One of the best places to find a list of the truth about yourself, can be found in the first chapter of Ephesians. Here is a partial list of what God says is true about you: You are in Christ.

Your are blessed with every spiritual blessing.

Your are accepted in the Beloved.

You are forgiven of all your sins.

You have redemption through His blood.

You are predestinated according to His purpose.

You are filled with the Holy Spirit of Promise The list goes on and on, but the point is this.

Who you are in Christ and who you think you are may not be congruent. If they are not, you will want to trust Godʼs definition.

After all, He is the One who created you.

Number three, challenge the perceptions of the past by reviewing your memories and the feelings you attached to them. If there is a painful memory that you canʼt forget, you have two options—1) forgive the offender(s) or 2) refuse to let it go.

Through Godʼs grace, you can forgive every injury, mistreatment, or heartache.

Enjoy the memories that make you laugh and challenge the memories that hamper your joy of living in the present.

www.creatiques4u.com

Q&A GARDNER WITH

QUESTION: How should I handle peer pressure from friends who don’t understand not having sex until marriage?

ANSWER:

First of all, I greatly applaud your stance and your commitment to withstand the peer pressure. That is wonderful. God will honor that. Second, all you can really do is tell them your views— sex is Godʼs gift to be shared between a man and a woman in the sacred relationship of marriage. You can also tell them that exhaustive research has demonstrated that those who are most satisfied sexually—those who are having the “best sex”—are those who are in a committed marriage. It is true— but it should not surprise that Godʼs way is the best.

Finally, you have to examine your friends. It is important to surround yourself with those who do believe as you so and will support you when you’re weak and celebrate with you when you are strong. We ALL need that.

QUESTION: Are there any sexual practices within

DR. TIM

marriage that are considered sinful?

ANSWER: Paul writes: “Everything is permissible”—but not everything is beneficial.

“Everything is permissible”—but not everything is constructive. 1 Corinthians 10:23 (NIV) In marriage, there is sexual freedom to explore different sexual practices (as long as it follow the Biblical guidelines of “one man/husband, one woman/wife.” As such, a Christian wife and husband have sexual freedoms to try different things (different positions, oral sex, and so forth), but do not have the freedom to bring in outside stimulation (pornography, other people). Also, we should avoid behaviors that have proven to be physically unhealthy and destructive (example: anal sex). However, even with this freedom, the ruling law should be the “law of love;” spouses should not force or manipulate their mates into doing something that makes them uncomfortable.

Should husbands and wives be willing to “try new things?” Sure. But should they be forced or, if they try something new and don’t like it be talked into doing it again? No, no they shouldn’t. Love must rule.

Question: I’m currently in love with my future husband, we plan to marry in June of next year, we have been sexually active; we are monogamous.

Is it best to wait until we are married even though we love each other and plan to marry?

Answer:

The short answer is “Definitely, yes!

You should wait.” It is great that you are in love and great that you are planning to marry, but, in reality, a large number of engagements break off for a wide variety of reasons. More importantly, however, is because God has created sex to be the sealing act of the marriage covenant. And He has created the boundaries of marriage to protect that special sign of a married coupleʼs commitment. I encourage you to get the book Sacred Sex and read chapter 10.

Question: Where is the line drawn between intimacy and sex in a relationship? How far can you go without it being considered a sin?

Answer: A great question, but not necessarily a great way to ask it. I assume you are asking as a single person, so I will answer it that way.

To say that touching “here” or doing “this” is as far as you can go, then we all have a line to push up against – and God didn’t give us that line. Our goal before God should be purity.

We should also know that our desire to want

to go “all the way” with someone we love is part of God’s plan. It is a God given desire for physical and emotional oneness. Sex is great – within marriage. However, we must also learn constraint and self-control, both in and out of marriage. The question we should ask is, “Are we conducting our physical relationship in a manner that is honoring to God?” It is clear that God calls us to keep sex within marriage.

It is also clear that we should steer FAR from temptation. Talk with your partner; commit together to live your life in a way that is honoring to God

PulpitPerspective

R E V E R E N D ,

D R .

T R O Y

E .

L A D D

THE ULTIMATE COMPARISON OF THE WILD AND THE WISE Ecclesiastes 2: 4-17 I made great works; I built houses and planted vineyards for myself; (5) I made myself gardens and parks, and planted in them all kinds of fruit trees. (6) I made myself pools from which to water the forest of growing trees.

(7) I bought male and female slaves, and had slaves who were born in my house; I had also great possessions of herds and flocks, more than any who had been before me in Jerusalem. (8) I also gathered for myself silver and gold and the treasure of kings and provinces; I got singers, both men and women, and many concubines, man’s delight. (9) So I became great and surpassed all who were before me in Jerusalem; also my wisdom remained with me. (10) And whatever my eyes desired I did not keep from them; I

kept my heart from no pleasure, for my heart found pleasure in all my toil, and this was my reward for all my toil. (11) Then I considered all that my hands had done and the toil I had spent in doing it, and behold, all was vanity and a striving after wind, and there was nothing to be gained under the sun. (12) So I turned to consider wisdom and madness and folly; for what can the man do who comes after the king? Only what he has already done.

(13) Then I saw that wisdom excels folly as light excels darkness; and yet I perceived that one fate comes to all of them. (15) Then I said to myself, “What befalls the fool will befall me also; why then have I been so very wise?” And I said to myself that this also is vanity. (16) For of the wise man as of the fool there is no

enduring remembrance, seeing that in the days to come all will have been long forgotten.

How the wise man dies just like the fool!

(17) So I hated life, because what is done under the sun was grievous to me; for all is vanity and a striving after the wind.

We are again looking at how this preacher has made many Get up, get out, experiments in an brothers; we eort to discover are just two of something good in the same kind. itself. He looks for But this guy an end or purpose

with all of that wealth and wisdom was still wild enough to go about this movement without considering God in his scheme.

that one might labor for, a goal that might become a resting place for the soul. Here he discovers that the experiences of the wise and the wild are much alike including the chances of life, the descent of death and the fast approaching oblivion.

When you look at us

as people, our conditions and circumstances distinguish or contrast more quickly than the dierences in our character. All of our senses are attracted and our imaginations excited by the spectacle of wealth moving alongside neglectful poverty. We are excited by the power moving alongside helplessness.

However,my brothers and sisters,we must know before we continue that Solomon is speaking of the kind of wisdom that stands much lower than godly wisdom that is the direct product of His Spirit. He has no reference to the wisdom that blesses us with a good that cannot be taken

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rules. So I thought that I would raise three issues suggested by this text for our consideration.

I. First of all in the comparison we recognize the natural difference in the wise and the wild. (Verses 13-14b-”Then I saw that wisdom excels folly as light excels darkness. The wise man has his eyes in his head, but the fool walks in darkness.”)

This preacher moves us to review the nature of things to see that the first difference is as clear as that which exists between night and day or darkness and light. He all but says that God Himself is all wise and all reasonable things that practice in his character and nature stand out by divine wisdom. All other knowledge apart from God or that that does not consider God is the away. He is speaking of that distinction of the head rather than same as leaving God and that of the heart, of the understanding rather than that of the going wild like the prodigal entire spirit. Yes, he is still trying to help us see that any gain son in Luke 15. Look that does not consider God is like chasing the wind (it’s vanity). what he says, you exercise misuse of your God-given Now since we are reflecting and reasonable people,we ought to have faculties or common sense. more interest in the nature of life as it compares to the wild or fool, “The wise man’s eyes are who is moved by passions and other people and the man who in his head.” This proverb considers, deliberates or thinks through carefully and then says that some use the

R E L AT I O N S H I P S

power of observation and judgment given them. It’s obvious that our eyes are intended to guide our steps. When we look before we step, we don’t fall. In the same way our understanding and reason are intended to give direction to our voluntary action, which become our habits which constitute our moral life. The wise use these senses.

The wild or fool on the other hand “walketh in darkness.” He has eyes but makes no use of them. They shut them, or, like so many they blindfold themselves with whatever is around them. They fill their understanding and reason with attractions of passions that naturally cause them to wander from the path and the results are a fall into danger, and many times, destruction.

mystery has oppressed the minds of watchful, reflecting people from the beginning of the fallen age and has caused many to fall into skepticism and others into atheism.

Solomon declares that the wise and the wild in many cases meet with the same fortune while they live when he says, “one even happens to them all.”

Wisdom does not always meet with prosperity and wildness does not always bring the fool to poverty, suffering and shame. There are people who are ignorant, wicked and unthinking, but shrewd enough and sly enough to advance themselves. Then some are wise and are not moved by the world but continue to neglect the means or II. Secondly, in the comparison we recognize source by which their prosperity is secured. the noticeable status of the wise and the wild.

(Verses 14c-16—”and yet I perceive that Let me use two quick examples—one from one fate comes to all of them. Then I said Isaiah 44 and one from 20th century rap. to myself, ‘What befalls the fool will befall God talks to Israel in Isaiah 44 about idolatry me also; why then have I been so very wise?’ or being foolish. He says to them the same And I said to myself that this also is vanity. tree that you are wise enough to use for heat For of the wise man as of the fool there is to warm yourselves and fuel to cook your no enduring remembrance, seeing that in the food, you are foolish and wild enough to carve days to come all will have been long forgotten. the leftover into an image and call it “god.”

How the wise man dies just like the fool!”) Look at the inconsistency and neglect of where the wisdom and the wood come from.

This preacher is convinced by evidence that all of us ever how wise or wild have an apparent Well maybe that one didn’t catch you. equality of our lot in life. He is convinced How many of you remember 2 Pac, the that whatever retribution, reward, or payback rapper? He was wise enough to step up we have coming is of incomplete character and record CDs that would put gold on his in the world. He is impressed with the fact neck and have a home outside the slums that the fortune of men is not determined by or ghetto. He was wise enough to write rap their wise behavior or moral character. This that would reach back into the ghetto slum

and encourage brothers to get out. I know because he said in one of his songs, edited, of course, “someone has to explain why we don’t have anything.” Get up, get out, brothers; we are just two of the same kind. But this guy with all of that wealth and wisdom was still wild enough to go about this movement without considering God in his scheme.

This preacher is sure that only moral means secure moral ends. So we can have prosperity spiritually that will never reveal our greatness on earth. I know because he said, “for of the wise man as of the fool there is no enduring remembrance, seeing that in the days to come all will have been forgotten.”

In other words when a few years have passed, the memory and reputation will be as dead as the one who died whether good or bad.

Now someone may be looking at me now saying if that’s true, why trouble myself with good and right if soon all will be the same? Well our encouragement that we don’t get beside ourselves is -

But it seems very plain that when he comes to his deliberate convictions, he stands as a believer in God because he concludes by saying, “I saw that wisdom excels folly.”

He was as we are who labor in the word of God. He had a higher standard of judgment, a higher law of conduct than the world can every supply to the wild and foolish who never consider God. He is trying to help us to understand that we can’t keep letting earthly results be the measuring rod of our judgment upon morality. We have a much truer standard in our reason and conscience, in that voice from heaven that talks back to us in meditation, that light of the Lord that guides our footsteps which is the word of God. So my brothers and sisters if being wise and good calls for us to be afflicted in the body, to be plunged into adversity by our friends, to be forgotten by other men, do it, for we have chosen the better part.

You need not envy the wealth of the fool. Just keep following Christ, the one who incurred the malice of men, who was despised and rejected and crucified.

Yes he came to the same end. Just like all other men, he died, but because he considered God, he was approved and accepted by God. After death, He was raised and exalted to everlasting dominion. In the Bible wisdom from God is justified of her children. We won’t be shaken because we will always be satisfied with the fellowship of our Master.

III. Thirdly, in this comparison we recog-nize the unquestionable excellence of the wise over the wild. (Verse 17—”So I hated life, because what is done under the sun was grievous to me; for all is vanity and a striving after wind.”)

If this was all that we had to look at, we might think that the spectacle of human life had gotten the best of Solomon’s mind. One could think that he has begun to doubt divine providence. If we leave it here, some may think that he did not care to make a stand “ONLY MORAL MEANS SECURE for right, truth, and good. How-ever, as he MORAL ENDS” YOU NEED NOT passed through these moods of pessimistic ENVY THE WEALTH OF A FOOL character, he had some doubts and difficulties.

SPIRITUAL

M A R C E L L U S

M A R T I N

Our day of rest

Cant Get

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POWE R MAGA Z IN E JANUARY 2004

A Rest It

is amazing the number of secondary issues that divide believers.

Denominations spring up over night because of issues like tongues, church government, baptism etc. Secondary does not mean unimportant. These issues are worthy of consideration and should be handled biblically. But, they are not essential. Essential issues are what make Christianity what it is. Things like the nature of God, salvation and the bodily resurrection are just a few items that are deemed essential. If any of these are deleted or changed, we cease to have Christianity and instead turn to a cultic mindset.

The secondary issue we want to explore is the “Sabbath”. Is it on

Saturday? Is it on Sunday? Who is wrong and who is right? It is ironic that our “day of rest” can’t get a rest from this age-old controversy. What does the Bible say or, for that matter, does not say about the Sabbath? Let’s explore this from both biblical and secular histories so that we can give this issue a well-deserved rest!

IN THE BEGINNING When did time begin? Of course we all know that the Genesis account shows that all things started when God spoke (Genesis 1:1).

That includes time. In Genesis chapter one, time is measured in “days”. The term day can have more than one meaning in scripture.

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and rested the seventh day: wherefore the Lord blessed the Sabbath day and hallowed it (Exodus 20: 9,10a & 11) KJV. In these verses the six-day cycle is spoken of at least twice. The one day of rest (the seventh day) is also mentioned twice. If something is mentioned more than once in a text, that is where the emphasis is being made.

That is a rule of biblical interpretation or hermeneutics. The

church at Rome concerning disputes between Jewish Christians and Gentile Christians. The arguments were over liberties such as what foods to eat and what day to worship on. The Jews were hardcore followers of the Law of Moses. In their minds, Saturday was the Lord’s day of rest. To them, anybody not observing Saturday was in violation. The Gentile believers chose to worship on the first day of the week (Sunday) because of the resurIt is in Jesus that we get our rest. rection. They had no Law of So it really does not matter what day we Moses, so this seemed only worship. It’s all good! logical for them. In Romans 14:1-6, the apostle Paul sets the record point is simply this: straight (read the text). In verse 5 he The Lord wanted them to follow his states, “One man esteemeth one day example. He labored six days, so above another: another esteemeth evshould man. He ceased work for one eryday alike. Let every man be fully day, so should man. Note also that persuaded in his own mind”. Then he even here in Exodus, God does not adds, “He that regardeth (observes) the mention the name “Saturday”. He day regardeth it unto the Lord; and he doesn’t mention any name for that that regardeth not the day, to the Lord matter. To the Hebrews, their seventh he doth not regard it” (v. 6a) KJV. calendar day was already established Simply put, no day is better than any 400 years prior to Mt. Sinai under the other day to worship. Just make sure Egyptian rule. To put it in modern you have a day set aside for rest and terms, it was a no-brainer. worship. As we would say today, “Whatever floats your boat.” Just do THE NEW TESTAMENT: it!!

BRINGING IT ALL TOGETHER In Colossians chapter 2, Paul hits Okay. So what does all of this mean home on this point again with more to you and I today? Let’s look to the clarity. “Let no man therefore judge book of Romans first. In chapter fouryou in meat, or in drink, or in respect teen, the Lord led Paul to write the

of a holiday, or of the new moon or of the Sabbath days. Which are a shadow of things to come; but the body is of Christ”( V. 16, 17). The Mosaic dietary restrictions and calendar observances were shadows of what Christ would fulfill. Many misunderstood the intent of the law. Christ declared Himself to be Lord of the Sabbath. He said, “The Sabbath was made for man and not man for the Sabbath. Therefore the Son of Man is Lord also of the Sabbath”(Mark 2:27, 28) KJV. He is the literal fulfillment of all of the ceremonial laws. He was the ultimate lamb slain for our sins and he is the Sabbath in whom we can rest. “Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls” (Matthew 11:28, 29) KJV. It is in Jesus that we get our rest. So it really does not matter what day we worship.

It’s all good!

PRACTICALLY SPEAKING I realize that even after this long explanation on the Sabbath, there will still be those that will still hold fast to Saturday only. So, for the benefit of those persons (and it might be you) let’s look at practical applications of the Saturday only, no work observance. Let’s just say that you have a child and that child

accidentally swallows a marble. It is lodged in the child’s throat. You are frantic! You dial 911. No one answers.

It’s Saturday, the Sabbath. You take the child to the emergency room. The doctor says, “I’m sorry. It would not please God that I work on the Sabbath.”

You can guess how this scenario ends.

Let’s also say that you have a break in.

You call the police. The recording tells you that all law enforcement is off in observance of the Sabbath. These are very real situations that happen everyday. Don’t you see? The Lord already knew that people would have to work on odd days and odd hours. Some of these people are God ordained officials that protect us (Romans 13). Some of these people are Christians, also. God doesn’t do anything without a reason.

Nor does he omit anything without a reason. Maybe, just maybe, he did not specifically name the days in Genesis because He did not want to pigeon hold believers to a specific day. It would not be practical for our everyday living. But, wouldn’t you know that we’d pigeon hold ourselves anyway! I’m just thankful that God is in control and not us.

This issue still won’t be agreed upon until Christ comes back. We can debate it but should never divide over it. Personally, I can’t wait until the day when the Sabbath can finally get its REST.

F A M I LY

Life is a theater -

54

P ERSONAL

POWE R MAGA Z IN E JANUARY 2004

invite your audience carefully.

Not everyone is holy enough and healthy

really understand, know and appreciate

enough to have a front row seat in

you and the gift that lies within you?

our lives. There are some people in

The more you seek God and the things

your life that need to be loved from a

of God -- the more you seek quality, the

distance. It’s amazing what you can

more you seek not just the hand of God

accomplish when you let go, or at least

but the face of God -- the more you

minimize your time with draining,

seek things honorable -- the more you

negative, incompatible, not-going-

seek growth, peace of mind, love and

anywhere relationships/friendships/

truth around you, the easier it will be-

fellowships! Observe the relationships

come for you to decide who gets to sit

around you. Pay attention. Which ones

in the FRONT ROW and who should be

lift and which ones lean? Which ones

moved to the balcony of your life. You

encourage and which ones discourage?

cannot change the people around you...

Which ones are on a path of growth

but you can change the people you are

uphill and which ones are going

around! Ask God for wisdom and dis-

downhill? When you leave certain

cernment and choose wisely the people

people, do you feel better or feel worse?

who sit in the front row of your life.

Which ones always have drama or don’t

Author Unknown

DEVELOPMENT JANUARY 2004

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BELIEVE IN YOURSELF. TAKE RISKS. LIVE EACH DAY AS IF IT’S YOUR LAST!!!

It has been said many times, in order to be great, you have to be good. In order to be good, you have to be bad and before you can be bad, you have to get started.

Getting started involves risks. I have taken my share of risks in my professional and personal life. I’d like to share a few of my experiences with you.

My work or chosen profession of speaking and performing is my dream job. I think my calling as a performer manifested as early as the second grade. On a particular day when we had a substitute teacher, I’ll call her Mrs. Gary.

She stepped out of the classroom, momentarily, to speak with another teacher. At that moment, I decided to show my classmates my chest.

What better vantage point to demonstrate one’s physical prowess than from the top of one’s desk? So, I jumped up on my desk and stood there as I opened my shirt for all to see my chest. At the same moment, Mrs. Gary stepped back into the classroom and caught me in the act and sent me to the principal’s office. From there, I was sent home and told not to return until one of my parents could bring me back to school. Needless to say, I was disciplined by my father, mother, and grandmother. I recall my mother saying to me, in disappointment, “You are the most different child…” I eventually returned to school with the promise to keep my shirt closed. Lesson one: In order to be good, you have to be bad.

As a child, I was blessed to be surrounded

by music. My grandfather, James Obelton Holmes, Jr. “Pop Obie” as I called him, was a classically trained vocalist and educated at Hampton Institute (now Hampton University.)

My father, LeCount Holmes, Sr. was a jazz vocalist who, from a very young age on the Ted Mack Amateur Hour, demonstrated his great singing abilities. My mother, Althea “Sparky” Holmes, loved to listen to classical and jazz music throughout our home. So, music has been in my life for as long as I can remember. But in order to be know my level of excellence, be it great or mediocre, I had to get started singing.

I’m reminded of the first time I sang in a jazz club in Washington, D.C. My friend, Pat, encouraged me to do so. She was aware of my love of music and that I had a fairly decent baritone singing voice, but I was not as confident as I am today. I took the stage, as my palms begin to sweat and the tremor of my nerves could be heard through my voice, however, I got started…and finished the song, “Misty.” I remember it as though it happened yesterday. The audience applauded, although not a standing ovation. I left the stage knowing that wasn’t my best performance, but it was a start. Mediocre, maybe, but as least I did it!! My friend Pat commended my efforts and I’ve been singing on stage every since. Lesson number two: In order to be good, you have to start and take a risk.

My life has included taking many risks. I have had the good fortune to live in six states over the past thirty years. My experiences have included speaking, singing and performing in a variety of settings. In my early years as a performer, I reenacted the great orator and abolitionist, Frederick Douglass before and audience of the Jack and Jill organization in Atlanta, GA. Again, at the prompting

and tightened up my act. I’ve learned much more about being a public speaker and orator. One of my many performances was as Mr. Marvelous, as a masked man dressed in top hat and tails, delivering singing telegrams. As Mr. Marvelous, on bended knee, I’ve honored Ms. Oprah Winfrey in song at her office following her success in The Color Purple. I’ve honored the late Mayor Harold Washington of Chicago as well as Atlanta Mayor Andrew Young. I serenaded Dr. Johnetta B. Cole and the late Yolanda King, both on their birthdays. Mr. Marvelous also sang a tune to the “Fly Jock” Tom Joyner and so many other wonderful people. of a dear friend, I attempted something that was new in the form of a historical reenactment, dawning a wig, full beard and period dress reminiscent of Mr. Douglass’ era. The performance was convincing enough and received a respectable response from the audience. Immediately after my performance, I removed my wig and beard and came out of character to talk with the children in the audience. My comfort with center stage was more highly developed, but I lacked the full knowledge of showmanship. Never come out of character in front of your audience. Lesson number three: In order to be great, you have to be good. In order to be good, you have to take risks.

Since that time, I’ve polished my showmanship

Believe me, over the years, I’ve asked myself these words many times, “When will I grow up?

When will I be like everyone else? When will I take life seriously? When? When? When? Then I realized that I am taking my life very seriously, however nontraditional. Unfortunately there are those who take life so serious and along with being dissatisfied with many life decisions, they fail to experience joy or pleasure. My reality has been filled with much “joie de vivre” as well as many teachable moments and serious challenges.

I have no regrets for any of the experiences in my past. I am thankful for all that I’ve experienced has made me a better person and a better man.

So, my message to you is this, live your life and take as many risks as you possibly can. This life certainly cannot be returned for a deposit. You won’t be able to cash it in when it’s over and get

following statement, “I believe the spirit of another one. Make every second, minute, hour, Frederick Douglass is in this man.” Thank you, day and week count. Life is so short in the grand scheme of things. Take a chance. Risk it and flourish. Ms. Lewis for your vote of confidence.

Lesson four: In order to be great, you have For the past sixteen years, I’ve been a motivational/ to be good. For the record, I remained in character until I returned to my dressing room. inspirational speaker. For twelve of those years I’ve performed my one man show of Mr. Frederick My friends, I ask you to believe in the Douglas throughout the U.S. and London. People often ask me, “How did you decide to portray Frederick Douglass?” My reply, “I think more than anything, I believe, as many spiritual leaders might say, I have a calling.” I was honored to do a month-long tour throughout Pennsylvania earlier this year in February.

Rebekka Coakley wrote in the February 23, 2007 Altoona Mirror the words of Penn State Altoona sophomore, Lesleyan Lewis, by which I remain flattered. Ms. Lewis stated, “where there’s no struggle, there is no progress,” were the most memorable words of the performance for her. She then concluded her remarks with the

impossible so that you’ll achieve the incredible.

In closing, I’d like to share my recipe 21st century success that will make a considerable difference in your life.

1. Remove fear and face it head on.

2. Applaud yourself everyday and give yourself a standing ovation. You are your most attentive audience.

3. Prepare from the inside out. Make sure you are solid spiritually, intellectually, physically and financially.

4. When climbing your our personal mountain, don’t give up. Take a break to catch your second or third wind, along with prayer.

5. Honor the power of family. A family who prays, works, faces challenges and laughs together will stay strong together.

6. Take risks. The Bible teaches that we walk by faith and not by sight. Put that quote in action and know that your real security is in a higher power.

7. Challenge yourself always. This will take you to the next level.

8. Set goals for you and your family, No goals? Call your nearest funeral home and tell them you’re ready to be eulogized.

9. Ownership vs. consumerism, Frederick Douglass once said, If we are not beneficiaries of our own fruits and labor, we might as well be slaves.

10. Attitude is contingent upon how you see yourself, others and situations, Work on keeping your attitude strong.

LeCount’s recipe for the 21st century will work for you, just remember to mix well and refer to this as often as necessary, throughout your life time.

By LeCount R. Holmes, Jr.

L e Count R. H o l mes, Jr .

LeCount R. Holmes Jr. is a motivational and inspirational speaker/trainer from Atlanta, Georgia, whose one-man historical re-enactment of the life and times of Frederick Douglass has received much acclaim.

PROGRAMS ��

Character Portrayal (Frederick Douglass)

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How To Tie Your Tie Through Self-Esteem

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“A little learning, indeed, may be a dangerous thing, but the want of learning is a calamity to any people.”

The Name of Life’s Game is “Don’t Give Up”

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Watch the Words of Your Mouth: They Tell More Than You Know

~ Frederick Douglass

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Difference Matters

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How to Maintain a Positive and Productive Work Environment

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It’s Not Over If You NEVER Quit!

LeCount Holmes, Jr.

Frederick Douglass Accolades for LeCount R. Holmes, Jr.

“Your words of inspiration were truly uplifting and heartwarming…”

Connie Keith, Child Care Director, YMCA “[Our students] were privileged to see a talented man who exhibited self confidence, compassion and intellect.”

Elizabeth L. Harris, Assistant Principal, G. P. Babb Middle School “An outstanding performer and group facilitator…”

Doris K. Wells, Branch Manager & Adult Programmer, Wesley Chapel Library

Determination to Soar Forever

For a custom quote, available dates and more info, contact us at 989.871.2538, Fax: 989.871.2531 or email us at lfckchildress@tds.net Performance fees are adaptable and based on venue, location and time of year.

AlekWek is redefining the face of beauty

S

udanese, supermodel Alek Wek personifies the new mood taking place in the fashion industry, and has sent a loud message as to who or what is beauteous.

The seventh of nine children Alek is from the region called Bahr el Ghazal, in the southwestern part of the country.

Her name means “black spotted cow” the most common and best loved types of cows in Sudan, which is also a symbol of good luck for her tribe the Dinka people.

Alek’s country has always been split between the Islamic Arab north and the animist and Christian South. They don’t ever seem to mix well and the north has always tried to dominate the

south and impose Islamic culture on the non-Muslim and non-Arab southern people.

Having to build their lives on the run, Alek’s parents gave birth to their first child while in exile. Wanting to give their children a good education, the freedom to marry whom ever they choose and an opportunity to prosper in the modern world, they settled in a town called Wau, about 300 miles from Uganda.

Growing up in the traditional Dinka way they never ate more

than two meals a day, with the first one consisting of tea and a bit of bread which was usually what they had for breakfast.

As time went on Alek knew only a few

years of peace with her family before they were caught up in a ruthless civil war that pitted outlaw militias, the muslim-dominated government, and southern rebels against each other in a brutal conflict that killed nearly two million people.

In an excerpt taken from her book Alek chronicles one of many horrific days that prompted their exodus from their hometown. “I stared into the darkness after the gunmen left. There was no moon and we couldn’t light the oil lanterns for fear of the light being seen outside, so it was impossible to see a thing...

Gunfire in the distance kept me on edge; I feared the militias would return. There was the smell of gunpowder.

Men were yelling. Each time one of the cows snorted out in the yard I thought it was someone climbing over the wall.”

A civil war that erupted in the mid-1980s interrupted their relatively placid lives, and as a result of the conflict, Wek’s father, a teacher, was injured and went to the Sudanese

capital of Khartoum for medical treatment.

When the fighting near their home worsened, Wek talked her way onto a military plane that was taking refugees out of the area and to Khartoum.

She was just ten, and had nothing on her except the clothes she was wearing-and left her mother and brothers and sisters behind. “We couldn’t all go together,” Wek recalled in an interview with People, “so I decided I had to go on my own.”

Fortunately, the rest of the family were able to join her in Khartoum soon afterward,and they grieved together when their father died. At that point, an older sister of Wek’s living in London launched a complicated process to get her siblings out of the country.

Only Alek, her mother, and one other sister made it to England as refugees; the other siblings landed elsewhere in Europe. Since leaving Khartoum, Wek and her family have never been reunited all at once because all possess various travel restrictions on their visas.

Wek’s transition from the Sudan

to parochial school in London as an immigrant was not an easy one in the early 1990s. Classmates teased her because of her looks. “It was painful to be called names,” she remembered in the interview with People, but pointed out that she refused to become discouraged, and that after just being herself for a while, “they got used to me.” By 1995, Wek was a college student enjoying a street fair in London one day when someone approached her and asked if she was interested in modeling; Wek refused to take the stranger seriously at first, but the woman was with Models One, a top London agency. Intrigued, Wek then had some professional photos taken, and suddenly saw herself in an entirely new light: as she told People, her first reaction to the images was, “Oh, my God, this is me!” Her only obstacle to launching a modeling career was convincing her mother to let her abandon her college studies.

Wek was quickly offered plum assignments, assuaging any worries her mother might have had.

She appeared in some British and Spanish fashion magazines, and arrived in New York City in June of 1996. Her long legs, dark skin, and clipped hair adorning a nearsculptural head excited interest there as well, but she has been adamant about not being barricaded into the “tribal” category. Initially signed with Ford Models, Wek grew unhappy with the way management “sold” her to clients.

When her agent decamped to IMG Models, Wek followed. “Some

people at {Ford} said I would never sell, I was too dark,” Wek told the New York Times’s White. Some also predicted she would never win any cosmetics advertising jobs, but then Wek landed an assignment to represent makeup artist Francois Nars’s new product line.

S o o n international cosmetics giant Clinique was courting Wek as well, as were designers Isaac Mizrahi and Moschino.

She appeared on runways in New York, Paris, and Milan throughout the rest of the year and into 1997, and also had cameos in videos from Janet

Jackson and Busta Rhymes. But it was her appearance on the November 1997 cover of Elle magazine that made Wek one of the hottest models in the industry: despite gains made by all women of color against lingering beauty stereotypes, black models still landed on the covers of top magazines only infrequently.

Furthermore, the ones that did were more likely lighter-skinned women such as Naomi Campbell or Tyra Banks.

Elle’s editor, Gilles Bensimon, shot the cover himself, putting Wek in white on a white background.

With the starkly contrasting colors, Bensimon was trying to project the idea “’Nobody is out, everybody is in,’” as he told the New York Times’s White. “I thought, if I was African-American, I never would see myself in magazines,” Bensimon reflected. Yet the fact that Wek is not actually AfricanAmerican has caused somewhat of a stir, and though the Elle cover incited an onslaught of extremely positive reader mail at the magazine, her agent at IMG does receive some negative letters. Some find fault with Wek’s look, seeing her rise as evidence of a new form of stereotype from the other end of the spectrum,

the “primitive” or “exotic” tag. Wek, who refuses to appear at model calls that ask for black models, is perplexed that her rise to the upper echelons of the fashion industry has generated controversy. “I can’t understand the fuss,” Wek told Newsweek’s Allison Samuels. “In my village there is no problem because we all look the same. Here there is so much difference in skin--so much is thought about it, and that’s sad.”

When not jetting back and forth across the Atlantic on modeling assignments, Wek makes herself at home in in New York. She likes to in-line skate in the city—her fans now call out her name on the street--and entertains her friends by cooking traditional Sudanesefood in her kitchen. She also phones her mother in London often. “I love having friends around,” Wek told the New York Times.

“You’ve got to make yourself happy. I’m a happy person naturally.”

Alek has been named “Model of the Decade”, one of People magazine’s “50 Most Beautiful People and one of the “50 Most Influential Faces in Fashion.

She has also been featured on the covers of Germany: ‘Vogue’ -, Italy: ‘Photo’, Japan: ‘Elle, Russia: ‘L’Officiel, Vogue and the hottest face in fashion”

by Newsweek.

Sometimes seen as the ‘face of Africa’ , she has modeled in numerous ready to

wear and Haute Couture fashion shows for designers such as Coach’s “Most Influential People” campaign, Ralph Lauren, The Gap, the Banana Republic and Clinique.

Alek also designs a range of designer handbags called “Wek 1933”, that has her fathers name and his year of birth on the brass zipper tags. And if that isn’t enough she is an artist and has fascinating artwork on her website.

Alek’s daring story of fleeing the war on foot and her escape to London, has inspired many around the globe.

This Christmas if you are looking for that special gift, consider purchasing her autobiography for your family and friends and introduce them to International Super ROLE Model - Alek Wek. We would like to thank: and acknowledge the writers and photographs who gave us permission to quote excerpts and utilize photographs.Thank You www.bestsexycelebs. com for the collaboration.

For more information about Alek Wek visit these reources: Wikepedia, Alek Wek, Alek’s co-author Stephen P. Williams www.alekwek1933.com, www.geocities. com Please forgive us if we accidentally overlooked your contribution

WWW.ALEKWEK1933.COM

Immediately you may think, a hair stylist, but the Indianapolis native introduced himself to the world more than 10 years ago.

Mr. Baptiste is the forerunner of natural hair care, color, and style. Technically he is a loctician; What is a Loctician?

A Loctician starts, grooms, colors, cuts, and repair locs, but if you have ever seen Thierry Baptisteʼ work than you know

Who is Thierry Baptiste? he is an artist/educator, whose palette happens to be hair. He states, “the greatest misconception about my artistry is that people believe locs are not hair,” but as he displays through his loc art (if I may) “locs are larger strands of hair that can be and is shampooed, cut, colored, styled, and very versatile.” He has transformed what you thought natural should be or look like.

By Tasha Jones

He deďŹ es society on a daily basis by creating master pieces that carry the history of Africa which deposits a self awareness that exudes love (must I remind you, he is an educator).

Natural hair, listen to the sound of it, natural hair, in a world that spoon feeds nipping, tucking, ďŹ xing, correcting, botox, lifting, stretching you get the picture, natural is refreshing. As it is, Mr. Baptiste, is a natural guru, who ďŹ ne tunes the natural look, educates the unnatural and natural mind, and builds/encourages the spirits of those who have ever encountered

him or his work. He is an artist who practices peace and positivity, in fact those elements are the focal points for Mr. Baptiste, and just as Picasso; his work is easily recognizable, but in the case of Mr. Baptiste his work carries the rhythm of the Motherland. It dances off canvases with vibrant color, uncanny style, and an opulence of creativity. On a continual basis Mr. Baptiste dares himself to evolve, and in the evolution, Mr. Thierry BaptisteĘź naturalism is a

breath of fresh air in a world that is over congested and over processed!

For more information on thierry baptiste please check www. thierrybaptiste.com or visit www. myspace.com/thierrybaptiste.

For more by Tasha Jones please check www.iamtashajones.

Com, www.indy.com, www. myspace.com/iamtashajones

H E A LT H

M A R Y

S H A W - P E R R Y ,

P H D . ,

C H E S

Everyday Wellness

The “Healing” Laughter

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POWE R MAGA Z IN E JANUARY 2004

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augh and the world laughs with you.

Like ripples in a still pond, laughter spreads positive energy through a room in seconds, releasing tension, bridging barriers, and sparking friendships.

And as you open your beautiful, smiling face to the world, laughter moves deep within, getting to the heart of stress and stimulating healing at its roots.

“Yes…laughter is good for the mind, body, and spirit” Free your psyche. Finding humor in a difficult situation can ease emotions and paint a positive frame of mind.

Laughter lets loose endorphins, helping you better cope with pain.

Relieve stress with laughter. Humor lowers levels of cortisol—a fight or flight chemical that puts pressure on the heart and inhibits the immune system.

Laugh it off. A good belly laugh burns as many calories as a ten-minute bike ride and tones muscles in the stomach, legs, and back--just for fun.

The physical act of laughing conditions the lungs and releases an antibody that helps protect the upper respiratory tract.

Laughter is indeed the best medicine. Getting the giggles puts the immune system in overdrive, raising the level and activity of cells that work against viruses.

Plan to have some fun: Looking forward to a good laugh is as beneficial as laughter itself.

“Next time you feel anxious or ragged around the edges, remember a good laugh helps to keep the doctor away!!”

H E A LT H

POWER RAISES ITS VOICE IN THE FIGHT AGAINST CERVICAL CANCER

J

anuary is Cervical Health Awareness Month, with the goal of educating and empowering women across America to visit their clinician for their Pap smear test. Vigilance on the part of women about early detection through cervical cancer screening is crucial because cervical cancer, caught early, is nearly 100 percent curable.

The American Cancer Society (ACS) reports that between 60 and 80 percent of American women with newly diagnosed invasive cervical cancer have not had a Pap smear in the past five years and may have never had one. The unscreened population groups include older women, and the uninsured, ethnic minorities (especially Latina women, African Americans and Asian Americans), and poor women, particularly those in rural areas.

Cervical cancer is one of the most common causes of cancer worldwide, and one of the most preventable and treatable. The American Cancer Society (ACS) estimates that about 12,800 cases of invasive cervical cancer will be diagnosed in the United States in 2008 and about 4,800 women will die from the disease.

Recent advances approved by the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) have been developed to enhance the sensitivity of the Pap smear. While the new technologies add some cost to the conventional Pap smear, these costs may be offset by the savings gained by reduction in repeat Pap tests and doctor’s office visits and the elimination of unnecessary, invasive procedures that may cause emotional concern for women. Check with your clinician.

JANUARY 2008

POWER MAGAZINE

77

L T OEN H EHAOLT UH S E &DHR . OE M

S T R A U S S

& Creativity L

ooking for a new way of decorating

that lifts your spirit on a daily

basis? Are you out to inspire a

Aw o Chr nderful istma s gift!

child to go after and do whatever they choose

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POWE R MAGA Z IN E JANUARY 2004

to, overcoming all odds? Are you seeking to

inspire, enlighten, and empower your children, family or friends by filling their homes with a design that is uplifting? Your search is over!

Create inspiration through interior design with an ethnic enlightment for encouragement, empowerment and the enthusiasm of children and adults of various cultural backgrounds.

Create a room with symbols that constantly encourage you to go for it, beckoning

sports where he would have to work really hard. The portrait of her daughter while engaging in a stance at ballet rehearsal was designed to encourage her choice

Ethnic Inspirations

by Marshaé has what you are looking for or we can create that special custom design. your thoughts so you can achieve the impossible or reminding you of the challenges you face and the strength you have to face them.

At Ethnic inspiration by Marshaé, the products are made for you to achieve your goals and dreams.

A Mom-Prenuer (Mom/Entrepreneur) M. Ramona Dorsey, wanted to decorate her children’s rooms with designs that encouraged them in whatever they were vying for in life. In her search there was nothing that met her needs. She then created the design for the children’s rooms from portraits of them in action on the football fields and ballet. The designs were made to encourage her son in his choice of

to dance ballet. Ramona Dorsey saw an opportunity to not only encourage and inspire her own children but all children and Ethnic Inspirations by Marshae was developed.

Inspiring and uplifting the homes of families of diverse and ethnic and cultural backgrounds throughout the world is her goal. She strives for continuously building of children’s self- confidence and foundation at an early age to face life challenges and choices through daily inspiration. Ethnic Inspirations by Marshaé has several products for children and adults that fill homes with reflections of their children in action. Hence the JANUARY 2004

POWER MAGAZINE

79

“Fill your homes with reflections of you”.

At the website, you will find many designs of wallpaper borders, art prints and other products to decorate rooms in your home that provide an inspirational atmosphere that allows you along with your children to dream and envision their future.

The new line of borders is an expansion of

American boys playing golf. The “Let’s Cheer” depicts young African American girls cheering it up for their favorite team.

Coming Soon! You will enjoy the decorative flare and colors, a touch of music, play, and dance with “An International Playground”, “Mocko Jumbi”, “Steel Pan”, “Mariachi”, “Island Princess”, “Orchestra”, and “Under the Sun”. The talk around town is it has more fun, love, and encouragement for the arts. This Fall 2007, Ethnic Inspirations by Marshaé was featured on Trade Show Today on “Bravo” and “Health and Beauty” TV Networks. You can also visit with Ethnic Inspirations by attending the American Baby Faire in Atlanta, Georgia on November 17 & 18, the “Expressions of Children” collection. 2007, located at Cobb Galleria on Cobb The new designs come with all the joys Parkway, Marietta Georgia. of childhood, playing, dreaming, and Visit the website to review products or just having fun. The “Rain Drop” design call to begin on creating whatever you reflects Asian girls playing in the rain. “It’s would like.

Showtime” depicts Hispanic girls dancing ballet. “Fairy Wonderland” was designed to let children know that no dream is impossible, and “Tee it up” fosters African

www.ethnicinspirations.biz or 1-888-626-0520.

By Valeria Webb

Fill your home with reflections of you!

™

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by Marshaé

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HOUSE&HOME

Black Interior Designer Showcase

Everick Brown’s

F

or some Interior Designers traveling the world helps them incorporate the colors and textures of foreign places into their designs; for Everick Brown his love of world traveling and culture has become the basis for his design style. His global perspective combined with his love of elegance and comfort has made him one of the most revered AfricanAmerican designers in the industry.

Born and raised in Los Angeles, Everick was exposed to high fashion, art and design at an early age via his mother who studied fashion design and owned a jewelry store. I was immersed in high fashion, color, and design my whole life but I was also very academic. After graduating from Fairfax High School, Everick attended Dartmouth College where he studied government with plans to go into law or politics. It was his love of fashion that led him to the New York City retail industry where he worked for Macys as the General Manager for Men’s Furnishings and J. Crew as a General Merchandising Manager.

Merchandising became Everick’s unofficial design training. Studying trends, creating displays, and visualizing lifestyles are all part of merchandising and design, it was great training.

While traveling all over the world for J. Crew, Everick gained exposure to primitive art and cultures which helped him develop his signature style modern classics with a global perspective.

Brown’s design influences come from furniture, artifacts and textiles from Africa, Asia and Europe. “I noticed while traveling in Europe that people were living in these old homes, some as old as 500 years, but all of their furniture and accessories were modern” Brown says.

With his style solidified, Everick began to work on residential interiors and developed an impressive roster

of clients. My clients are typically the rich-and-not-so-famous, Wall Street investment bankers, psychologists and

psychiatrists. They are very welltraveled and know a lot about design.

Growing tired of his commute from

New York City to his home in Chappaqua, Everick decided to bring his global perspective to the high-end residents of Westchester County. In 2002 he opened ebhome, a showroom which oers accessories, furniture and art in Mount

Kisco. With a huge following and a write-up in the New York Times just two weeks after the store opened, ebhome was a bonaďŹ de success and was voted Best New Store in Westchester, in 2002. In

2006 a second showroom opened in South Norwalk, Connecticut.

In selecting designs for the showrooms, Everick attends gift and art shows and considers designer

referrals. Some of ebhome’s most popular pieces included sectionals and hand-blown glass vases as well as the ever-popular organic pieces. We are expanding our collection to include more sustainable green merchandise.

It is essential that everyone begin to take a look at green design and we are definitely at the forefront of that.

When asked about trend forecasting Everick says look no further than places like Target and television commercials. “There is definitely a move toward modern in America. Even Ralph Lauren’s collection, which has always been classic traditional, there are modern elements emerging”. He continues, “If you look at the set for Ellen’s show, it’s all modern, it’s definitely becoming the norm in the states.

Despite the success of his stores, Everick continues to work primarily as an Interior Designer. He was a featured designer for the popular Essence Showhouse for Essence magazine, a renovation of the historical Abyssinian Baptist Church in Harlem and most recently he was invited to speak on modern design for the New Caanan Historical Society’s Interpretation of Modern Today.

by Jerise Henson BIDS Contributing Writer

www.macys.com/

O

bedience Is Better Than Sacrifice No matter what the popular prosperity message teaches, sacrificial sowing will not lead to financial increase if you are not adhering to the universal laws of money management.

LaVondilyn J. Watson

It’s not by might, nor by power, but by my spirit, says the Lord. There is nothing we can do to force the Lord into blessing us financially if we haven’t done the work necessary to receive from Him. His blessings are freely given to those who love and obey Him. Increase is a direct result of a life of obedience.

On that particular night, though, I wondered if they knew that.

not you should obey what you are hearing.”

Bernique is the founder of Increasing H.O.P.E., a non-profit organization that provides financial literacy training in the community. And although she serves community businesses and schools, she has a heart for the Body of Christ and focuses much of her efforts on educating believers on how to manage their finances God’s way. While serving, she is constantly presented with the challenges that the popular prosperity message creates.

According to Bernique, “So, if our bills are overdue, our homes people are pouring their finances, money they being cannot afford to repossessed, and our credit give, into offering plates on Sunday world, why then are we sowing and suffering sacrificial seeds on terribly Monday through Saturday, with the expectation that God will bless their sacrifice.

As I watched the saints of God, some haves, but However, what they are finding is that the increase most have-nots, rush toward the pulpit, pledges in hand, hope and expectation in their hearts, something that they are praying for, and being promised, never arrives. Why? on the inside of me just didn’t set well. A feeling of “Because they are not implementing the universal doubt, anger and then sadness fell over me. Didn’t laws of money management,” she explains. “They they know that their superfluous giving wouldn’t are failing to budget, and set boundaries for their move God, that only obedience would? spending. They aren’t paying themselves first. They That “something” on the inside of me that reacted aren’t delaying personal gratification. They’re not defensively was undoubtedly the Holy Spirit; the paying their bills on time and maintaining an same Spirit that speaks to me when I am about to acceptable credit score,” she says. “They are not being walk into a dangerous situation. Someone else may responsible [with] their finances,” she adds, “and God call it “intuition”, but this “something” is one of the benefits of my relationship with Christ and it tells me responds to faithfulness and responsibility, just like the lord did in the Parable of the Talents.” when something “ain’t right.” That particular night, This notion of responsibility is the premise upon that whole picture wasn’t quite right. which Bernique’s platform of Kingdom Conscious Money ManagementTM is built. This new The “prosperity message” creates problems perspective of money management teaches that we, Perhaps you’ve had that feeling—that uneasiness as the Body of Christ, are simply managers of the when it was time to give that sacrificial offering.

Perhaps you’ve felt that gentle tap on the door of your money that we have been given. God is the rightful owner of all the resources of the earth—our money heart when the request for an ungodly amount came included.

And He looks to us to manage it wisely— down from that earthly throne. If you have, you are not just the ten percent that we tithe, but the ninety not alone. According to Dorothea Bernique, author percent that we keep as well. Bernique teaches that of Kingdom Conscious Money Management, many God desires us to be faithful stewards over the funds people in the Body of Christ are having that same that He provides us and that our financial situations experience every Sunday.

“Our spirits will bear witness with the Spirit of God,” are a direct result of the level of spiritual maturity we she explains. “If what we are hearing lines up with the have in Christ.

So, if our bills are overdue, our homes are in Word of God, there should be peace. There should not foreclosure, our cars are being repossessed, and our be a struggle with the inner man about whether or When the call from the pulpit came to pledge their entire income tax checks, did it even register to them that the size of the seed didn’t matter if their intentions were all wrong, if their financial house was not in order? I wondered if they knew that pledging a fortune without the right relationship would not yield the results their pastor was promising.

“Who among you will be found faithful?” he asked.

“God will honor your sacrifice,” he guaranteed, “and give you the desires of your heart.”

are

in foreclosure, our cars are scores mirror that of the Sunday morning?”

www.kingdommoney.org

ostentation (or pretentious display...the act of showing or exhibiting...intending to attract notice) “That attitude has now been brought into the Church,” Bernique states. “We’ve lost sight of the true meaning of prosperity. We’ve defiled it and reduced it to attempting to obtain worldly riches without having a right relationship with Christ.

And Revelations 3:17-19 gives us an accurate picture of what it is to have riches without a relationship with Him. It says you are wretched, and miserable, and poor, and blind, and naked...What a horrible state to be in!”

But that same passage says: as many as I love, I rebuke and chasten: be zealous therefore, and repent. Bernique is quick to share the depths of God’s grace and His Because thou sayest, mercy, stating that no matter how far you may have strayed away increased with goods, and have God’s desire for your knowest not that thou from finances, He is so faithful and just to forgive you. God wants art wretched, and loving, fulfilling relationship with blind, and naked. Rev 3:17 youa through Jesus Christ. He wants to bless you bountifully! Bernique teaches will, but your intentions must be in line with His that it’s God’s will for you to prosper; He just will. According to Bernique, the major problem doesn’t want you to do it without Him. with the popular prosperity message that is taught “Prosperity is based on a sincere relationship with from many pulpits today is that it focuses on selfGod, obedience to His Word and a life of trust and gratification—sowing seeds for a new house, or for faith. He wants to increase you spiritually, physically, a fancy car. This popular message teaches that there mentally and emotionally—all so you can glorify is nothing wrong with having “things”—and to a Him and advance His Kingdom! certain extent, it’s right, she says, but not when you “Seek ye first the Kingdom,” Bernique advises. feel like you deserve those material things.

“Don’t focus on the stuff, just get the relationship “The attitude displayed in [the prosperity message] right and the stuff will come as a result.” is one of haughtiness and arrogance, like status and material things are your right as a child of God. It’s How responsible will you be with God’s money? not an attitude of gratitude. It doesn’t come from a As for those who are sowing mercilessly and place of humility and responsibility,” says Bernique. getting nothing in return—contrary to what you God wants to bless us, but mainly so we can bless may have been told, it’s not always a matter of others. He wants us to be a distribution center— waiting on “God’s divine timing” for your harvest. constantly doing things to build and advance the Bernique advises that you listen for the voice of Kingdom. “It’s not about the big house, about the God; just like the Holy Spirit confirmed for me cars, not about the bling bling, but it’s about the that something wasn’t quite right about those Kingdom of God,” she asserts. saints sowing their entire income tax checks Wikipedia defines “bling bling” as: a hip hop (which they hadn’t even gotten yet!), the Spirit will term which refers to expensive jewelry and speak to you as well. “There should be no guilt or other accoutrements. But it also defines it as: an discomfort when you are giving. And intimidation entire lifestyle built around excess spending and

credit scores mirror that of the world, why then are we sowing sacrificial seeds on Sunday morning?

“It is an unjust balance. We are operating by faith by sowing seeds, but there are no works, no acts of responsibility in the other areas of our finances,” she says. “God will not overlook all of that. He is a God of order. And He desires obedience. You will not see the results your pastor is promising, if you know in your heart of hearts, that you have been mismanaging God’s resources.”

It is God’s will that you prosper...just not without Him The good news is that God desires for you to prosper! He wants to bless your finances, and He

I am rich, and need of nothing; and miserable, and poor, and

and manipulation are red flags,” warns Bernique. increase, not how much you sow. So, spend Monday “Ask yourself, ‘am I giving to please God or am I through Saturday getting your financial house in giving to please man?’ and honestly assess who your order. Prove to God that you can be faithful over obedience, and allegiance for that matter, is to. Are the little things and perhaps then, He will bless you hearing from God?” you with more. And then maybe on Sunday, that We’ve all heard it said that “experience is the sacrificial offering won’t hurt so badly; it won’t be as best teacher,” and if this is true, Bernique is a star much of a sacrifice. According to the Word of God, student. She is well aware of the ill effects the obedience is better than sacrifice anyway. prosperity message can have on a believer, having been a part of a congregation like the one described LaVondilyn J. Watson, Author of The Presents above. When the Spirit of God convicted her, she of God, writes full-time on the beautiful coast of didn’t initially respond, but eventually, she could no Charleston, SC. She publishes articles, books & longer ignore its prompting. greeting cards that encourage the kingdom of God. “We are going to have to answer to God for what Visit her company, UPLIFT Publishing Co., at we hear Him speaking to us. That teacher, leader, www.encouragethekingdom.com. pastor...will not be there with you when you have to give an account for how you handled God’s resources,” she says.

“I had to choose whether or not I would be Photo attributes: Mildred Moore, Moore Memories obedient to God or stay in a situation where, Photography, www.moorememories.com ultimately I would be blocking the blessings of the Lord and hindering my ability to work and serve in His Kingdom.”

In the end, it’s really not about us and what we want. It’s not about sowing all we have for that nice house or car (although God wants us to have those things). It’s not about us positioning Dorothea Bernique ourselves to receive from God more material www.increasinghope.org things or to have our personal needs met. It’s about positioning ourselves financially to be a blessing to one another—to help His mission of Kingdom advancement. We can’t do that if we are irresponsible with what He has given us to oversee.

And we can’t be a light to the world when our finances are a mess. How can we be an example to them if we look just like they do?

The Word says our people perish for a lack of knowledge. Thanks to ministries like Dorothea Bernique’s, we now have the knowledge. There’s no longer any reason for us to perish. The question becomes, however, will we act on the information we have been given or will we continue to ignore the Spirit’s knock on our heart’s door?

The advancement of the Kingdom of God depends on your finances. How responsible you are with God’s money, and the condition of your heart when you give, will determine your level of

FINANCE

K AT H Y

M I L L E R

F I N A N C E

E D I TO R

PEACEFUL MONEY

MANAGEMENT FOR COUPLES

R

egardless of how much or how little people have, money management is the most common cause of dissension in relationships. While each couple is unique, most arguments about financial matters start with either lack of organization or lack of communication.

Both of these are behavior issues, and behavior can be changed. Following are some tips for peaceful money management: 96

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GET ORGANIZED Create systems that work for both people. Choose one place for checkbooks, receipts, and other information regarding financial transactions. Use a file marked “Payables” for credit card statements, monthly mortgage, car, and insurance payment booklets, utility bills, etc, which should all be kept together until they have been paid.

making the data more accessible to your partner.

SCHEDULE A “MONEY MANGEMENT MEETING” Sit down with your partner regularly to discuss your finances. Arrange all information about what bills are due, how much is due, and the date each payment is due into an easy-to-read format. I recommend using the system in A Good Steward’s Money Management Journal ($14.95 at www.agoodsteward.net), a calendar/workbook with simple, stepby-step instructions for organizing your finances.

Together, go over your expenses, compare your monthly income to your monthly expenses, and brainstorm solutions to problems that arise or ways to increase income. For instance, if you find your paycheck will not cover the new hockey equipment your son needs next week, you PUT DETAILS IN WRITING could choose to take action on selling Many people carry their financial that timeshare in Orlando or the treadmill information around with them in their turned coat-hanger that is collecting dust in head -- the monthly direct debit for the your basement. Maybe you have medical health club membership, the month they bills you have been meaning to submit to renew their auto insurance, the day they the insurance company for reimbursement. promised to pitch in for Aunt Martha’s You might decide it is a good idea to take new sofa-bed. While the ability to remember facts and figures is impressive, on a part-time job or pick up an extra shift at work. The point is to think of solutions all that information takes up prime real estate in your mind. Did you know Albert together.

Einstein could not recite his telephone STOP MONEY NAYHEM number from memory? He saved the The Money Meeting is meant to empower space for new ideas. Getting all those you. While facing the facts and figures may details out of your head and onto paper be disheartening or upsetting at first, will help you feel more peaceful while

CONFRONTED BY REALITY “Please,” I whispered to the officer, “not in front of my grandson.” Shaking his head, he leaned toward me with handcuffs dangling from his outstretched arm. Moments earlier he had told me, “I just want you to go downtown with me to answer a few questions.” And now he was handcuffing me and mumbling something about police procedure. He pulled the handcuffs back when he noticed five-year-old Tyler standing a few feet away. Tyler clutched a little red truck in one hand and the hem of his mom’s skirt in the other. My family stood frozen and stared at the six police cars backing out of the driveway. I felt the officer’s hand on my arm as he escorted me to the only remaining car. With each rapid breath, my heart felt like it was going to explode. Ducking into the back seat, I looked up at him and held out my wrists. CLICK. CLICK. The cuffs were securely in place and Tyler hadn’t seen.

Everything was happening so fast. It was far too much to be feeling in the space of a

single moment, but that was the kind of moment it was. For years I had danced with the devil, but instead of waking up from a nightmare, I awoke in the middle of it. Peeking out the car window, I watched my family huddled together. I thought of my sons . . . my third daughter and her children . . . and Tommie, my boyfriend. When everyone came home that evening, Juannie and Kathy would tell them some version of what happened. They would probably stare at each other a n d try to make some sense of it. They couldn’t. Looking down at the handcuffs, I wondered if my family would forgive me... he shot a worried glance into the back seat.

Satisfied that I would be okay, he climbed into the driver’s seat and started the engine... “You remind me of my mother.

She’s about your age.”

I whispered, “I am a mother, and look what I’ve done!”

Gripped by Gambling As you are reading this paragraph, someone you know may be embezzling money to support a gambling addiction.

Every day the newspaper, TV, radio and magazines carry stories about the compulsive gambler who has committed a crime, committed suicide because of the shame, or they are being locked up in a psyche ward. Some women have used their bodies to earn money for gambling.

I have 16 years of recovery from gambling and have written a book which has been placed in all the high schools, colleges, and universities in the state of Mississippi.

Please take a minute and look at my story of addiction, recovery, and my life today. http://www.grippedbygambling.com/ Ask yourself, are you spending more than you want to on gambling? Are you beginning to lie to your friends when they ask questions about your gambling? If you think you may have a problem or have any questions about the addiction, this book will answer some of your questions and reveal some warning signs. The author, Marilyn Lancelot, has sold over twelve hundred copies. It has been purchased by readers in at least 30 states in the US, several provinces in Canada, Mexico City, England, Ireland, Scotland, Australia, New Zealand, Poland, and several other countries.

Sincerely, Marilyn Lancelot

remind yourselves that sometimes the problem gets bigger before it gets better. In order to prevent the session from turning into an argument, preface your meeting with an agreement about what you will do when tensions rise. Some couples choose to light candles and take deep breaths; others take a walk or drink a cold glass of water. You could consider having an objective thirdparty sit with you the first few times.

In my coaching practice I often act as a mediator as couples learn how to communicate about their finances without arguing.

If you find yourselves in trouble get help right away. Do not make a bad situation worse by delaying action.

Professional counseling and coaching services are available, and sometimes one session is all it takes to get you back on track. Learn how to make money management a positive force rather than a destructive force in your relationships. If there are real problems, they will be easier to face when you face them together.

Kathy Miller is a Prosperity Coach and the founder of A Good Steward, a consulting firm that helps individuals, couples and groups overcome personal and professional obstacles. For more information or to schedule a confidential consultation, call (908) 647-1856 or visitwww.agoodsteward.net.

Indonesia Amanjiwo

Amanjiwo (which means “peaceful soul� opened in 1997) is a monumental resort fashioned out of limestone and takes its inspiration from the surrounding culture of Central Java.

The resort is located within a natural amphitheatre with the limestone Menoreh Hills rising directly behind, the Kedu Plain in front and four volcanoes – Sumbing, Sundoro, Merbabu and Merapi – gracing the horizon.

Amanjiwo looks out onto Borobudur, the largest Buddhist sanctuary in the world.

Indeed, Borobudur is carefully mirrored in the resort’s design and central dome.

The view runs arrow-straight through Amanjiwo’s entrance and the stone corridor that neatly cleaves the resort, up the steps to the soaring, bell-shaped rotunda, down to the Dining Room, on to the Terrace, past rice fields in an unwavering line to Borobudur itself. Several kampungs (small villages) are within walking distance.

Amanjiwo is constructed from paras yogya – the local limestone. Thirty-six suites radiate outward from the main building in two deep crescents. These are rimmed by high, limestone walls set off by spider lilies and morning glory. The walls blend into the stone walkways that link the suites to the main building and the Pool Club. At the far end of the resort, in a lush tranquil setting, is the Dalem Jiwo – a large private suite.

Amanjiwo is constructed from paras yogya – the local limestone. Thirty-six suites radiate outward from the main building in two deep crescents. These are rimmed by high, limestone walls set off by spider lilies and morning glory. The walls blend into the stone walkways that link the suites to the main

building and the Pool Club. At the far end of the resort, in a lush tranquil setting, is the Dalem Jiwo – a large private suite.

Amanjiwo’s suites feature terrazzo flooring, high ceilings, domed roofs and sliding glass doors that open onto a garden terrace with a view of Borobudur. Fifteen suites come with

to the suite’s private swimming pool.

The 15-metre pool, finished in a green Javanese stone known as hijau danau, is set into the rice fields. The Dalem Jiwo personal attendant, always on call, has separate quarters in the compound.

The Dalem Jiwo Suite is set in a discrete compound complete with a

private swimming pools. All suites include a thatched-roof gubug (pavilion) with a daybed for outdoor lounging and dining. Interiors include a central, fourpillar bed on a raised terrazzo platform, sungkai wood screens, coconut wood and rattan furniture, old batik pillows in classic Yogyakarta style, and traditional glass paintings.

The Dalem Jiwo Suite is set in a discrete compound complete with a private entrance, a classically styled rotunda and surrounding terrace with two separately walled bedrooms, each with stone steps descending

private entrance, a classically styled rotunda and surrounding terrace with two separately walled bedrooms, each with stone steps descending to the suite’s private swimming

pool. The 15-metre pool, finished in a green Javanese stone known as hijau danau, is set into the rice fields.

The Dalem Jiwo personal attendant, always on call, has separate quarters in the compound.

Four Pool Suites have views of the Menoreh Hills and surrounding farmland. The 10 Deluxe Pool Suites have views of Borobudur and Java’s most sacred mountains – Merapi, Merbabu, Sumbing and Sundoro. The natural stone pool stretches from the bedroom toward the outdoor pavilion. The pool is six metres by three.

From Borobudur and Gedong Songo to Prambanan and the Dieng Plateau, many of the most ancient and important of Asia’s religious monuments and temples are on the plains and volcanic slopes of Central Java. The 8th Century Buddhist wonder known as Borobudur is among the bestpreserved ancient monuments in the world. The sanctuary, with its million and more cut-stone blocks, 1,460 stone relief panels and 504 life-size Buddha statues, each sculpted from a single stone, occupies a modest plateau. From the top

www.naturesindulgence.net

gallery of Borobudur, Central Java reveals itself. From Borobudur, return to Amanjiwo atop one of the Sumatran elephants available for Amanjiwo guests. The two-hour safari rambles through the kampungs of Borobudur with uncluttered views.

The Dining Room, with its silver-leaf ceiling swirling with muted colours, is defined by a double row of stone columns.

At either end, gold-leaf murals recreate scenes from the Hindu epic Mahabharata.

The tables are of black terrazzo, the chairs silverpainted rattan with Yogya cushions.

Indonesian and Western cuisine is served in an open-air setting. The specialty of the house is makan malan, a series of classic Javanese selections served in brass dishes.

Getting There: Amanjiwo can be reached by daily domestic flights to Yogyakarta and Solo either from Indonesia’s capital, Jakarta, or from Bali. Flights take less than an hour from either place and Amanjiwo is a one-hour complimentary transfer from Yogyakarta or two hours on the more scenic route from Solo, which passes some of the biggest volcanoes in Java. There are

also several direct flights to Solo from Singapore. Climate: Situated six to nine degrees south of the equator, Java enjoys a warm, tropical climate year-round with the most agreeable months being May to October. Humidity is highest between November and March, during the rainy season. Even during the heaviest rains, however, the sun is rarely out of sight for long. The mean temperature is a pleasant 27.2°C (81°F).

The great temples and the glittering arts of Java sprang not from Jakarta but from Central Java.

Make your own personal discoveries with Amanjiwo’s cultural excursions – by car, bicycle, horse or elephant. Resort drivers can escort guests through the region’s cities and villages, taking them to art galleries and trance dances, hidden temples and royal palaces. They can bring guests to Borobudur at dawn, show them the sunset from the highest point in the Menoreh Hills, accompany them up volcanic Mount Merapi at midnight or simply help explore a local market in the bustle of early morning.

CAREER

N ATA L I E

M I L L E R

N ew Year

NEW BEGINNING

write your own ending GIVE

THOSE CHARACTERS LEGS A ND L E T T HEM WA L K ON T O T HE PAGE

10 8

P O W E R M AG A Z I N E D EC E M B E R 20 07

How many times have you heard someone say, “I could write a book”? But instead of saying, “Why don’t you?” I always ask, “What would you write about?”

And then it starts. Everyone has a story. So I tell them to get something on paper. Then the truth comes out. “Oh, I can’t do that, I’m not a writer,” or “ I haven’t got time,” or I’ll get to that later when I’m finished with (you fill in the blank). Well I did that bob and weave for

twenty years, evading my God given talent, and to what avail?

Certainly not glorifying God in a way in which he provided.

Finally four years ago the desire to stay at home with my three year old forced me to face the excuse I had been using for years: I can’t be a writer, I won’t make any money. After quitting my job the answer became clear: and I’m not making any money anyway, so I might as well write.

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CAREER

Funny how God can put us exactly where he would have us to be.

So now you think you might want to write too? Maybe you’ve always wanted to tell your life story. Maybe your mother’s story.

If it’s a memoir, pick up a pen or glide your fingers across the keys until you’ve typed a page of information that you can use. Make a to do list of information needed to see this project through.

Research, talk to people, take notes. It’s all part of the process of writing. Maybe you have a fiction piece, an idea that keeps coming at you, each time a little more involved and with characters that act out a certain way, say a few things, but only exist in the corridors of your mind. Give those characters legs and let them walk onto the page. Write a synopsis just as if you were talking to me: “I’ve got this story and it goes like this…” Write until one of the characters starts talking. When you’re really attuned to it, you’ll be sitting in the room with your characters, unseen, taking notes. That’s when the fun starts.

Indiana came into play. I joined the year that I quit working and immediately started taking classes, joined interest groups and attended readings. Just being with other writers buoyed my desire to be one. I started telling people I was a writer and they started asking me what was I working on.

Writing for me is a joy, a blessing and a challenge. We’ve since had another child and I’ve had to be creative with finding the time to write. But it’s such a part of me; I never want to deny myself this gift. If you find that it’s a part of you, even in the smallest way, I encourage you to explore it.

This should be the year that you write and the time is now.

Beyond the fun there are two parts to writing: art and business. The artistic side of it includes your God given talent and any skills you’ve acquired; and the business side of it is well, the work. The writing, the editing, the submitting, the sharing your writing with others. And if you want to go professional – getting paid for what you produce.

I found that I needed to balance these two parts of writing. I needed classes and colleagues and venues to share my work.

For me, this is where The Writer’s Center of 110

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Natalie Davis Miller is a freelance writer and a member of the Writersʼs Center of Indiana. She is also a recipient of a 2003 Indiana Arts Commission Individual Artist Grant, supporting the completion of her novel, Higher Ground.

out of and on

1. Write whenever, wherever. Keep a notebook and pen with you. You never know when a tasty little morsel of an idea may hit you. I write in the pick-up line while waiting to pick up my seven-year old from school. It may be for only 15 or 20 minutes but itʼs 15 or 20 minutes everyday.

2. Get a schedule. I owe this one to Dan Barden, Professor, Butler University: start out writing 5 –6 days a week for 10 minutes a day. Then try to increase it by five more minutes the next week and so on. Getting yourself into a writing habit is a way of getting yourself out of procrastinating. And the consistency will show in the tone of your writing.

3. Donʼt worry about form, at least not yet. Much of the writing comes in the rewriting, at least for me. Often in transcribing my handwritten notes, I edit. Or if Iʼm composing at the keyboard, I do a quick look at the previous dayʼs work, (no major overhauls yet of the entire piece) and

I get back to writing. Sometimes the words spread out like butter and thereʼs nothing to edit. Sometimes it spreads like clumpy peanut butter and thereʼs plenty to do to make it edible. But itʼs all there.

4. Read, read, read. Read the type of books you might like to write. Read things you normally wouldnʼt read.

Read bad books and tell yourself you can do better. Read wonderful books and tell yourself you want to write like that. Look for books and magazines on the craft of writing at the library and bookstore.

5. Join ʻWriting” organizations. Even if you arenʼt writing yet, go to the readings, check out the classes, and meet other writers.

6. Did I mention write? Like anything, the more you do it, the better you get.

You donʼt have to have a life long desire to make a career or hobby of writing to be a writer. Writing makes a writer.

DECEMBER 2003

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SPOTLIGHT TECHNOLOGY

Making Money With

VOIP

Often times in life we hear about wealth trends too late. For instance did you make money on the PC revolution or the Internet explosion? Most people hear about business opportunities well pass the window of opportunity when the business is most lucrative. Today, I’m going to talk to you about the possibilities of making money with VoIP (Voice over Internet Protocol) the hottest trend in telecommunications right now.

WHAT IS VOIP?

Voice over Internet Protocol is a technology that allows you to make telephone calls using a broadband Internet connection instead of a regular (or analog) phone line. Using VoIP cuts the cost of making phone calls by more than 50% over traditional land line services. VoIP gives you rich calling features such as voicemail, caller id, 3-way calling, call forwarding and more.

There are also enhanced calling features that traditional phone service does not offer. For instance, the GLOBALINX VoIP product allows you to make unlimited long distance calls anywhere in the world at no additional costs (GLOBALINX to GLOBALINX) and it allows the user to take their phone number anywhere they go. Last, but certainly not least the GLOBALINX videophone allows you to actually see

the people you are calling in real time video.

Itʼs amazing technology that is absolutely changing the way the world communicates.

HOW DO I USE A VOIP PHONE?

Use it like you would use any telephone.

You pick up the phone, hear the dial tone and dial the telephone number of your choice. There are no extra numbers to dial and no special routines to follow. Itʼs that simple. You donʼt need a computer and you donʼt have to be a tech wizard to use VoIPjust someone who wants a great price and lots of features from their phone service.

Estimates project more than 60% of US households will be using VoIP in the next three years. For more information and to see a demo for yourself visit www.5linxmedia. com.

HOW CAN I MAKE MONEY ON THIS EXCITING NEW TECHNOLOGY?

So now you ask how can you get a piece of the pie? Itʼs a big pie and there is more than enough money being made for everyone to share in the glory- if you want to.

Companies like Vonage, Skype and Lingo are just a few of the over 1,100 companies marketing VoIP. These companies however use traditional marketing strategies which can cost them millions and millions of dollars to acquire their customers. GLOBALINX through a partnership with 5Linx, allows independent 1099 representatives an opportunity to market VoIP phone service as well as other telecom and technology services, and get paid incredible weekly and residual commissions for acquiring

customers. Set up a retail outlet marketing this technology or set up a home business. As an agent with 5linx you can market and get paid on VoIP and other products such as cellular, satellite TV, high speed Internet service, home alarm systems and more - with many major US carriers. You can make full-time or part-time income with this exciting home business. No specific skills or backgrounds are required, as the company provides all of the training you need to be successful. All across the US and abroad people are earning extraordinary income with this business.

For more information call 1-877-486-4774 or go to www.newvoipbusiness.com to learn more about this exciting company and technology.

Lisa Nicole Cloud, CEO of Elite Marketing Strategies, a (5Linx agency)

www.mmgsuccessmastery.comlisanicole

“I Have A

Delivered on the steps at the Lincoln Memorial in Washington D.C. on August 28, 19

Five score years ago, a great American, in whose symbolic shadow we stand signed the Emancipation Proclamation. This momentous decree came as a great beacon light of hope to millions of Negro slaves who had been seared in the flames of withering injustice.

It came as a joyous daybreak to end the long night of captivity. But one hundred years later, we must face the tragic fact that the Negro is still not free.

One hundred years later, the life of the Negro is still sadly crippled by the manacles of segregation and the chains of discrimination. One hundred years later, the Negro lives on a lonely island of poverty in the midst of a vast ocean of material prosperity. One hundred years later, the Negro is still languishing in the corners of American society and finds himself an exile in his own 116

land. So we have come here today to dramatize an appalling condition.

In a sense we have come to our nation’s capital to cash a check.

When the architects of our republic wrote the magnificent words of the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence, they were signing a promissory note to which every American was to fall heir.

This note was a promise that all men would be guaranteed the inalienable rights of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. It is obvious today that America has defaulted on this promissory note insofar as her citizens of color are concerned. Instead of honoring this sacred obligation, America has given the Negro people a bad check which has come back marked “insufficient funds.” But we refuse to believe that the bank of justice is bankrupt.

We refuse to believe that there are

by Martin Lu P O W E R M AG A Z I N E O C TO B E R / N OV E M B E R 20 07

A Dream”

963. Source: Martin Luther King, Jr: The Peaceful Warrior, Pocket Books, NY 1968

insufficient funds in the great vaults determination of the Negro. This of opportunity of this nation. sweltering summer of the Negro’s legitimate discontent will not So we have come to cash this pass until there is an invigorating check -- a check that will give us autumn of freedom and equality. upon demand the riches of freedom Nineteen sixty-three is not an end, and the security of justice. We have but a beginning. Those who hope also come to this hallowed spot that the Negro needed to blow off to remind America of the fierce steam and will now be content will urgency of now. This is no time to have a rude awakening if the nation engage in the luxury of cooling off returns to business as usual. There or to take the tranquilizing drug of will be neither rest nor tranquility in gradualism. Now is the time to rise America until the Negro is granted from the dark and desolate valley his citizenship rights. of segregation to the sunlit path of racial justice. Now is the time to open the doors of opportunity to all The whirlwinds of revolt will of God’s children. Now is the time continue to shake the foundations to lift our nation from the quick of our nation until the bright day sands of racial injustice to the solid of justice emerges. But there is something that I must say to my rock of brotherhood. people who stand on the warm It would be fatal for the nation threshold which leads into the to overlook the urgency of the palace of justice. In the process of moment and to underestimate the gaining our rightful place we must

uther King, Jr, O C TO B E R / N OV E M B E R 20 07

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not be guilty of wrongful deeds.

Let us not seek to satisfy our thirst for freedom by drinking from the cup of bitterness and hatred.

We must forever conduct our struggle on the high plane of dignity and discipline. we must not allow our creative protest to degenerate into physical violence. Again and again we must rise to the majestic heights of meeting physical force with soul force.

The marvelous new militancy which has engulfed the Negro community must not lead us to distrust of all white people, for many of our white brothers, as evidenced by their presence here today, have come to realize that their destiny is tied up with our destiny and their freedom is inextricably bound to our freedom.

our bodies, heavy with the fatigue of travel, cannot gain lodging in the motels of the highways and the hotels of the cities. We cannot be satisfied as long as the Negro’s basic mobility is from a smaller ghetto to a larger one. We can never be satisfied as long as a Negro in Mississippi cannot vote and a Negro in New York believes he has nothing for which to vote. No, no, we are not satisfied, and we will not be satisfied until justice rolls down like waters and righteousness like a mighty stream.

I am not unmindful that some of you have come here out of great trials and tribulations. Some of you have come fresh from narrow cells. Some of you have come from areas where your quest for freedom left you battered by the storms of persecution and staggered by the winds of police brutality. You have been the veterans of creative suffering. Continue to work with the faith that unearned suffering is redemptive.

We cannot walk alone. And as we walk, we must make the pledge that we shall march ahead. We cannot turn back. There are those who are asking the devotees of civil rights, “When will you be satisfied?” we Go back to Mississippi, go back can never be satisfied as long as to Alabama, go back to Georgia, go 118

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back to Louisiana, go back to the slums and ghettos of our northern cities, knowing that somehow this situation can and will be changed.

Let us not wallow in the valley of despair. I say to you today, my friends, that in spite of the difficulties and frustrations of the moment, I still have a dream. It is a dream deeply rooted in the American dream. I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: “We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal.” I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at a table of brotherhood. I have a dream that one day even the state of Mississippi, a desert state, sweltering with the heat of injustice and oppression, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice.

I have a dream that my four children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character. I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day the state of Alabama, whose governor’s lips are presently dripping with the words of interposition and nullification, will be transformed into a situation where little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls and walk together as sisters and brothers. I have a dream today. I have a dream that one day every valley shall be exalted, every hill and mountain shall be made low, the rough places will be made plain, and the crooked places will be made straight, and the glory of the Lord shall be revealed, and all flesh shall see it together.

This is our hope. This is the faith with which I return to the South.

With this faith we will be able to hew out of the mountain of despair a stone of hope. With this faith we will be able to transform the jangling discords of our nation into a beautiful symphony of brotherhood. With this faith we will be able to work together, to pray together, to struggle together, to go to jail together, to stand up for O C TO B E R / N OV E M B E R 20 07

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freedom together, knowing that we will be free one day.

This will be the day when all of God’s children will be able to sing with a new meaning, “My country, ‘tis of thee, sweet land of liberty, of thee I sing. Land where my fathers died, land of the pilgrim’s pride, from every mountainside, let freedom ring.” And if America is to be a great nation, this must become true. So let freedom ring from the prodigious hilltops of New Hampshire. Let freedom ring from the mighty mountains of New York. Let freedom ring from the heightening Alleghenies of Pennsylvania! Let freedom ring from the snowcapped Rockies of Colorado! Let freedom ring from the curvaceous peaks of California! But not only that; let freedom ring from Stone Mountain of Georgia! Let freedom ring from Lookout Mountain of Tennessee!

Let freedom ring from every hill and every molehill of Mississippi. From every mountainside, let freedom ring.

When we let freedom ring, when we let it ring from every village and 120

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every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God’s children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual, “Free at last! free at last! thank God Almighty, we are free at last!”

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“Mouths of Babes”

It’s a limited curriculum. For kindergarten classes in the Public School system, only the basics are taught - the ABC’s, Coloring 101, Number recognition and, to help the children develop their social skills, Intro Playground. For some kids, it’s enough. For others, like Miguel Ramos, it’s nothing.

“Learning disability,” his teachers murmur, and then shake their heads.

In the overcrowded, understaffed inner city schools, it’s easy for a kid like Miguel to fall through the cracks. But the teachers do what they can. Patiently line the crayons along the boy’s desk, point out the colors, repeating numbers drawn on the board, and hope that something sinks in.

What they don’t know is that Miguel is already a cum laude graduate of the School of Hard Knocks, a degree conferred to children in his circumstances. His daddy Javier’s been in prison longer than Miguel’s been He’s a difficult case, the teachers agree. alive . A narcotics bust sent him up, They’ve seen his kind before - the one he took the dive for, but that can dysfunctional child of a child. His happen when you’re in a gang. Nobody mother’s just seventeen and seems...well, rats on their brothers - it’s part of the irresponsible. And the father? They’ve code of the street. So Raoul sits in a never seen Miguel’s father- not even 6 X 8 at Stateville, marking time and sure he’s around, so that can’t bode well. wondering about the son he’s never Since Spanish is the language spoken seen. at home, Miguel doesn’t understand much English. Hard to tell what he Miguel’s mother? Already leeched of understands since he doesn’t speak, their childish roundness, Alicia’s arms merely stares at his teachers with those and face bear the tattoos that mark her big dark eyes that seem centuries older as an Insane Cobra. The same gang than his face. During class, he tracks her parents were in, the same that will the colored letters of the flashcards, the embrace her son. Miguel is a gang baby bright pictures of puppy and kitten - a cycle that starts at birth, ends when and car, and shows no emotion, no the casket is lowered into the ground. recognition at all.

And in between, whatever fate allows.

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STATEMENT OF NEED David E. Rogers states, in Adolescents At Risk that “The United States is doing poorly by its teenagers. We are seriously neglecting their welfare, their growth and development and we are paying a mounting price for that neglect... almost one in four adolescents have a low to absent probability of becoming responsible and productive adults.”

Symptoms of eventual failure in school become apparent to school authorities and teacher alike during the early grades in school.

These symptoms include behavior problems, attendance problems, non-completion of assigned homework, multiple suspensions, and poor grades. A local school district report indicates that African American males had the highest dropout rate of any other group. It is reasonable to expect that the vast majority of these high school dropouts are from at-risk neighborhoods and from less than ideal family situations. To further compound the problem, the vast majority of these youth are being raised in single parent homes, almost half of them having as their primary guardian a grandparent or other relative as opposed to their mother or father. The relationship between poverty,

school failure, child abuse, neglect, and juvenile delinquency is clear. Single offenses committed by 10-13 year olds, in some communities, comparatively speaking, out number the actual percent of the population these children represent.

The University of Pittsburgh’s Office of Child Development completed a study on children at risk based on several identified risk factors associated with negative outcomes for children including “growing up in persistent or concentrated poverty; growing up with a parent who is unemployed, a teenager, or a school drop out.” My experience working with youth over the past 15 years supports these findings.

Again, to quote David E. Rogers, successful intervention includes programs that “...were initiated early and dealt with antecedents not the failures; ...were caring programs that gave one-on-one attention to children... and many successful programs were located in schools. but often were not of them.” They were generally run by outside groups or agencies. The Mentoring Support Network provides a model to address the needs of our youth and young adults through mentoring and marketing that can make a difference nation-wide.

Now the ball is in your court. Let’s get started today.

Please click on our website or email address below to learn more. www.mentoringsupportnetwork.com hv.williams@mentoringsupportnetwork.com 412-231-3989 O C TO B E R / N OV E M B E R 20 07

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For gang babies, even their christening is a pledge of allegiance.

After the Church’s standard religious ritual, gang members bring their baby home for a night of revelry. Like most other families, except that here the bassinette is draped in gang colors - Cobras’ green and black for Miguel.

No christening gown, only a tiny set of gang colors that herald the baby as a future ‘banger. And photographs of the blessed event that show the proud parents, flashing gang signs in the background, pointing to the baby. His tiny hands are crossed over the black semi-automatic pistol they placed on his chest. A totem for the bloodshed to come, or an indication that this baby is already dead....it’ll just take a few years for the bullet to catch up with him.

But Alicia doesn’t think about that much. It’s hard on the street without her man, harder still with a kid. Hard to scrape up the money for food and drugs and the party life she still desires.

Cobras are expected to run with their set. She needs their friendship, and more than that, their protection. Gang women aren’t safe alone out here, and without Javier, anything can happen.

The other Cobras look out for her, but like everything else, protection costs.

Her body is still the currency that pays the fee, but there are younger, 124

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finer bitches out there, threatening to replace her. Girls who don’t live minute to minute worrying about the next fix. It’s oblivion Alicia buys with a needle and a spoon, escape from the thrusting men who use her and move on. At seventeen, she’s strung out, used up, and beyond caring about anything but getting high.

So when the phone calls come from Miguel’s school, Alicia ignores them.

The gueras are crazy - there’s nothing wrong with her kid. He knows plenty!

At five years old, he already knows how to chamber a round in the family guns - an important lesson in the survival game. He knows about gang loyalty, and protecting what’s his.

How to identify friends and enemies.

And didn’t she teach him how to bag marijuana for street sales, adding enough stems to increase the gram weight? Her kid is smart - street smart. In the Cobras’ world, that’s all that matters.

When the school’s phone calls give way to letters, she brushes them aside. Miguel doesn’t have a learning disability. So what if he doesn’t talk?

Better that than to be jabbering and screeching like some little brats. She knows he’s normal, even if she doesn’t spend much time with him herself.

Hanging out and getting high takes

Friendly. The big cop shows other up a lot of her time, but Miguel can handle it. Teach him to be independent, pictures - large drawings of the trouble Stranger Danger can bring. You never - a real man, just like his Daddy. know where he’ll turn up, the cop says. Could be on the street, or in a car.

So Miguel’s teachers do what they Miguel thinks of the drive-bys in his can. Flashcards and numbers and neighborhood and nods. He knows all color names are patiently repeated to the silent staring boy. While the other about Stranger Danger. And figures that maybe this is one cop who’s children play in the schoolyard, he okay. He knows about taking care of stands alone. No reaction moves his business, protecting against enemies. somber face, no emotion lights his Like the Cobras, Officer Friendly ancient eyes. carries a gun, and he wears blue like But on one Friday morning, everything the other cops, which must be the color of his gang. The little boy nods changes. Miguel’s class is visited by ‘Officer Friendly,” a cop who comes to again. It’s part of the street code, just speak with the kids. Taking in the blue like the Cobras. And for the first time, uniform and silver badge, Miguel’s eyes Miguel’s teacher sees him smile.

Several nights later, police respond widen in recognition. He’s seen cops to a ‘shots fired in the house’ call at before all over his neighborhood, and Miguel’s address. A man’s bleeding hears his mother speak of them. And body is sprawled across the threshold, she spits afterward, like a curse. and even in the dim light, his prison tattoos are clearly discernible. It’s But this cop is different. He’s got a Javier, recently paroled and returning gun - another thing Miguel knows home to his wife and child. The wife about, and he’s smiling. He walks around the room, joking and laughing, who now nods incoherently over a crack pipe while the child holds a showing pictures to the kids. Talking about some bad dude named ‘Stranger smoking 9mm Glock. Catching sight of the approaching police, Miguel Danger.’ Miguel turns the unfamiliar points at his father, and proudly, words over in his mind .He mouths carefully speaks those exotic English them silently, savoring the feel.

“Stranger Danger.” English words that words: “Stranger Danger.” mean trouble.

Copyright 2002 by Gina Gallo The class listens intently to Officer O C TO B E R / N OV E M B E R 20 07

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