Our club has a walker called Ray Who´ll tell you stories all day But, if he mentions an orange Every word you should challenge 'Cos you can't believe a word that he'll say! Roger Dale There are some Lagos walkers my god one tells some porkers One day he told a whopper got arrested by a copper His wife she did not a wail as he was hiked off to jail This walk was on a sunny day the bloody fool his name was Wainwright Jeff Patterson I walked as fast as my legs can go My head was thumping like a Kango I thought that I had walked to Bristol But wait! I see a frosty Cristal And a plate of red hot frango. David Foot There was an old walker called Bunney Didn't know his arse from his tummy He said where’s me stick? So I though I would kick It straight up his back side,...the dummy!! Wendy Bunney I walked with them down past the hedge, On a cliff top too close to the edge, She said "Look out matey" It was Tina Batey, and Ray Pocock, her husband, the Ledge. Nigel Heatley
The rules of the club are the theme Piri Piri with mayo's a dream Cristal's a blast Bad jokes from the past And carrying friends cross the stream Ray Pocock When its Up and Down Dale we are here We are not the quickest that's clear I may be lagging Marg may be flagging But we know we are going to get beer Peter McClusky We sometimes go walking with Ray Which is sometimes quite hard I must say But when problems occur Super Wendy is there And just makes them all go away. Kath Bailey Alternative ending We sometimes go walking with Ray Which can be quite hard I must say We'd be better by far Sitting in the Star bar Eating and drinking all day Kath Bailey We sometimes go walking with Ray Until he turned up in a sleigh We all ran amok Trying to get in this truck Then the reindeers they all ran away. Frank Sharpe
Twice yearly to Lagos we go And walk with our friends as you know The journey's a pain And we know it might rain But at least there's no bloody snow. Malcolm Bailey We walk with up and down dale Not always, ‘cos some weeks we fail But we are getting old And our legs tend to fold Perhaps we should keep off the ale. Malcolm Bailey When we walk with up and down dale Sometimes there's a sting in the tail It can be too far But there's always a bar For a beer at the end of the trail Malcolm Bailey There's a walk near Carrapateira And another at Mexilhoeira North of Silves is the best Much better than the rest Cos than Valdemar's lunch there's none fairer Roger Dale Have a good time on Friday night Choose the right winner so you don't cause a fight A few glasses of wine And you'll all be fine I'm sure the whole evening will be a delight Kath Bailey
There was a walker called Ray, Who set off to walk round the bay He took along Tina, So long since he'd seen her, And that really made her day. Patrick and Mary Lets meet at the cafe Zig Zag, We've just time for a beer and a fag, Then well nip round the block Keep an eye on the clock, Then it's vinho all night till we sag. Patrick and Mary We all love Up and Down Dale, It puts its exercise before ale, But once in a while Just to give you a smile They'll all drink beer by the pail. Patrick and Mary When walking with Up and Down Dale, Our leader he spotted a whale, It rose from the sea And gave a curtsy Then flattened poor Ray with its tail. Patrick and Mary Our walkers are friends old and dear, They stride the Algarve far and near 'This scenery's great But we've no wish to wait, Lets return and start opening the beer'. Patrick and Mary
Our walks could cause people angina, Especially our new member named china She's black and inflatable Makes some feel insatiable Especially when Adams near her..............vvvvv, let down valve!!! Wendy Bunney In the group there's a couple of Rogers On face value they look like two codgers But after closer inspections Reveal two small erections It appears they're just harmless tax dodgers.. Adam Bunney There once was an Essex girl in Lagos Who spoke a lot of tosh But when walking with friends Her accent did mend And she now sounds positively posh Sara Fox There's a walker in the club called Bunney His jokes are sometimes quite funny But most of them stink - least, that's what I think! Just as well he doesn't do that for money. Roger Dale Two walkers named Wendy and Adam. Couldn't tell gravel from macadam. He agreed just to suit her. Don't mention the scooter. Sometimes she can be a right Madame. Adam Bunney
Bunnies are gamboling up and down dales Neath thunder, lightening and gales. They are all on their own, No Roger and Joan Who decamped to the January sales! Roger “Laureate� Williams Jerry and Sara know they'll be missed At the awards - we are off the list But we trust you'll have fun In the land of the sun And hopefully all end up pissed Sara Fox There are members called McCluskey Who have a dog who thinks its a Husky Its name is Geddy Now lets get ready For a walk in the country Warwick Sola There is a member called Ray Who can spin five yarns in a day. But he tells them so well Just ask Bruno Mel. The olive tax you'll just have to pay. Adam Bunney What a lovely group of people they are Walking the legs off a donkey by far To get Piri Piri chicken and ale They will walk through a gale And leave me to get there by car. Michael Sharpe
Tarmacadam’s a place on a walk Where it can be heated when there’s some talk He said there’s no more road Then God did she explode He watched the scooter with the eyes of a hawk! Ray Pocock Beeupnose corner’s a place of some fame Naming locations are part of the game Tributes on each road To hamsters and toads Or sticks of knob heads they failed to reclaim Ray Pocock The Modelo principal is quite sound To some it may seem profound Weight heat and height Calculate them we might To determine how many Cristal’s are downed. Ray Pocock Up and Down Dale is a club Who spends a good deal of time in the pub Cristal, Washing lines Piri Piri and Grape Vines And Scrubbers are part of the rub Ray Pocock The club has a section called "Udders" Though all of its members are nutters! With machete in hand They traverse the land And make new easy trails for us others. Roger Dale
On the Bensafrim walk there's a well Where olives once grew, Ray will tell But to stop Spanish taxes The locals brought axes And chopped all the trees where they fell. Tina Batey At Castelejo there came a big wave For surfers to ride who were brave It crashed over the cliff Or is that just a myth? 'cos the lifeguard had no one to save. Tina Batey We have a club mascot called Pippi Though not young she's still rather zippy She rounds us all up Like a regular pup But with Geddy can still get quite nippy! Tina Batey The 'Spaghetti is hanging' you know Means only fast walkers not slow We like to be quick So we go at a lick But it's just for more Cristals we go! Tina Batey A new club was once formed goes the tale For people to meet on a trail They would go for a walk And crap they would talk That's how we became 'Up and Down Dale' Tina Batey
"Waresmistyk" (*) you might hear someone shout, or "That's where the scrubbers hang out". Catchphrases galore So if you want to hear more The craic's what this club's all about. Roger Dale *
1. A punk duo 2. A cry uttered by a walker when he or she suddenly realises that their "styk" has been left on the ground at the last watering hole
A group of like minded people went roaming On the Algarve it was they were combing The pinnacle of their desire Was to find chicken with fire To make sure that none were left groaning ! Pauline Sharpe The Stalwart Elites are the "Sewers"; The "Udders" - well, they are the hewers. Then there's "Warts" and "Crappy" They don't seem so happy. ´Cos for them there are no known cures. Roger Dale He took us to see hamster graves From a cliff top he showed us some waves But it's crap that he's talking For the speed of his walking Shows that it's Cristal he craves David Foot Predictive script is a scam So Adam becomes a big Swam When cancelling a walk Because he was a dork He will be Swam for the full programme Ray Pocock