WHAT IS IT LIKE TO BE A BLACK WOMAN IN AMERICA

BY DEIONA MONROE

CREDITED TO HEYCOFFEEBREAK.COM

Even with all that we go through, there is absolutely nothing that would shift me into thinking that I would ever want to be anything other than a woman who is black. I say anything because one, I wouldn’t want to be a man and two, I wouldn’t want to be anything but Black. Now, don’t get me wrong, I love men— especially my melanin brothers. However, it doesn’t compare to being a woman I mean…look at us! Being Black is unmatched. No matter how much we’ve been ridiculed and burdened, Black people are impenetrable. As a race, we’ve been stripped of our livelihood on so many occasions, but regardless we still rise. Now, take the woman, add the black. And Boom, fabulous creation.

With being so uniquely awesome, you’d think there would be no issues that come with being a black woman. We see so much appropriation of our style, culture, even down to our physical features, that you’d think we’d be admired so much more—unfortunately, we’re not. Though loved, we are hated at the same time. This brings me to point one.

BEING A BLACK WOMAN MEANS BEING IMITATED, BUT NEVER APPRECIATED.

In America, for whatever reason, the originator never receives as much acknowledgment as the copier. Throughout history, we see endless images, articles, newspaper spreads, ads, campaigns…so many things that ridiculed our appearance. Now, the most desired bodily features and attitudes are the ones of the ridiculed black woman. Plump hips, onion booty and the full lips are the soughtafter images…but only after it was gentrified.

owners…we get no respect. Of course, I love all my females and am happy that I don’t need to purchase anything but DAMN, is it really that hard to give us credit when credit is due? Did people forget where these images came from? And don’t get me wrong, there are those who show nothing but praise and admiration for the original creations, but, then there are those who are more satisfied with appropriation.

Though I am often imitated—as Jay-z once told us of himself—it is impossible for the black woman to be duplicated. Indeed, some may have successfully accomplished looking like a black woman, but, they will never authentically be a black woman. Yeah, yeah, y’all may be able to look like us, but you’ll never be real. People can make themselves into a false copy and be adored for it, but in the end, it is just so flattering.

BEING A BLACK WOMAN MEANS I’LL ALWAYS WORK 2X AS HARD.

I’m far from lazy, but honestly, it really gets me tight to know that I have to go above and beyond and then some—for even the simplest things— simply because of my sexual orientation and the amount of melanin in my pigmentation. History has clearly illustrated how African-Americans and women had little to no rights or say into how the criminal justice system was organized or how the laws were established and enforced. Being a black woman, it’s like having rights and dignity stripped away twice as much.

The good thing about this: the black woman has always proven to be strong. No matter how much turmoil we’ve faced, we always overpower and get the job done; I know you’ve seen the memes. Time and time again, the black woman has been

responsible for getting things done and keeping everything in order. And quite honestly, I see myself having to work twice as hard as a challenge, not a barrier. I, being a black woman, am such a threat and because of how powerful I am, it only makes sense that things would be made much more complicated for me. And that’s fine because the black woman always prevails.

BEING A BLACK WOMAN MEANS I HAVE TO REMEMBER TO LOVE MYSELF.

Everyone should love themselves and love others and never forget to do both. However—from what I’ve noticed over the years—the ones who bring themselves down the most are people of color, especially women of color. In this country, it’s easy for someone to not like who they are or what they look like—for a while, “black” wasn’t seen or displayed as beautiful; none of the models or actors on TV were of color. As time progressed, we saw more color appear, but not in their natural state. Women of color were pressured to be lighter, have straight, long hair, dress a particular way, even walk a certain way. The real black woman was undesirable.

But now, look at us! As I mentioned before, we are envied; even when others try to bring us down, we always have to remember that black is beautiful. I didn’t when I was younger, but my growth has made me love myself—my natural self—WAY more. From my kinky-coily curls, to my skin being 6 different shades of brown because I don’t properly tan…I love it all. I make sure that I know that I am a beautiful black woman and that I deserve nothing but love.

“We must reject not only the stereotypes that others have of us, but also those that we have of ourselves.” - Shirley Chisholm

There are a deal of hardships and strongholds that come with being a black woman, but those things are the reason why I LOVE being a black woman. When I was younger, I couldn’t fully comprehend the power we have, the change we have made and the accomplishments we have achieved. It warms my soul when I see a sister doing her thang.

MAN…IT’S GREAT TO BE A BLACK WOMAN.