RallyUp Mag Vol 5. Num 3.

OUR FIGHT

Proverbs 31:25

Our founder, Niki Powell Cottman’s fight began after her daughter, Kena’i Hollingsworth’s first attempt of suicide at the age of 13, then five other attempts that followed. She wants to change the trajectories leading to developmental challenges and early adversities that have led to youth and young adult suicide and substance abuse.

“the strength comes from being tested by life’s unpredictability.”

Matt

Lauer

“She is clothed in strength & dignity and she laughs without fear of the future.”

Contributors Meet Our Guest

Dr. Robert A. Johnson, MA, LPC, LMHC-S, CCM, GCDF, DHA

Specializes in the treatment of schizophrenia, depression, mood disorders, anxiety, adjustment disorders, PTSD, anger/stress management, intellectual and developmental disabilities, Christian counseling, couples/marital counseling, and family therapy.

Contact Info:

Email: robertjohnson665@aol.com

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/robert-johnson-iii-dha-lpcgcdf-ccm-cssgb-64928013/

Kimberly Whitmon

The CEO and Founder of Soul Strategies. As an Alignment coach, she helps women step into their most authentic and purpose-filled life by learning the inter and intra-personal skills needed to maintain inner peace, despite external chaos. As a certified happiness, emotional intelligence, and spirituality coach - as well as being a woman who navigates mental health herself, she brings a unique mix of theory and practicality, with a healthy dose of reality, to the women she serves.

Soul Strategies LLC

Phone: 202.335.0889

Web: www.mysoulstrategies.com

Email: kim@mysoulstrategies.com

Sadia Khan

UK Health Radio Host Psychology teacher and BPS member Sadia Khan have turned to social media to reach a wider audience. She gives much-needed advice about mental health, well-being, and relationships. Sadia also hosts her radio show on UK Health Radio, as seen in Cosmopolitan Middle East and Health Triangle magazine. Here she will outline what to expect during the holiday season and how to overcome mental health concerns during this period.

RUM FEAUTURES

Charita Brown

Charita Cole Brown was diagnosed with a severe form of bipolar disorder while finishing her final semester as an English major at Wesleyan University. Doctors predicted she would never lead a “normal” life. Despite that pessimistic prognosis and because she sought treatment, Charita went on to marry, raise a family, earn a masters degree in teaching and enjoy a fulfilling career in education.

Contact Information:

Charita Cole Brown Defying the Verdict: My Bipolar Life, visit www.charitacolebrown.com

Vol. 5 Num. 3

Ana’Neicia Williams

Ana’Neicia Williams is the founder of Momology Maternal Wellness Club. MMW Club supports mothers’ social and emotional care during preconception, pregnancy, postpartum, and parenting. As aLicensed Clinical Social Worker in Kentucky, Ana’Neicia is committed to holding moms as they heal their wombs in a safe and supportive space. She is certified by Postpartum Support International to assess and treat perinatal mood, anxiety disorders, and trauma associated with maternal mental health.

Contact Information: Instagram: @momologymwclub. Facebook: Momology Maternal Wellness Club Website: https://www.momologymwclub.com

EDITOR TEAM

Founder/Editor Chief Managing Editor

Asst. Managing Editor Associate Editor Fashion Editor Beauty Editor Youth Zone Editor Comic Illustrator Therapy’s Dope Editor Graphic Designer

: Nikita Powell-Cottman : TJ Woodard

: KeErica Brown : Paul Cottman & Vanity Dawson : Kena’l Hollingworth : TJ Woodard : Lex Morgan : RJ Sterling : Amanda Fludd, LCSW-R : Yeny Ferreras

CONTRIBUTING WRITERS

Lex Morgan TJ Woodard

Vanity Dawson

Talona Smith

KeErica Brown Kendra Hathaway, MFT Torre “Tor” White SherVonne Grose, MFT Amanda Fludd, LCSW-R

YOUTH CONTRIBUTING WRITERS

Nina Hollingworth

Lisence & Copy Right

No portions of the publication can be transmitted, reproduced, or distributed in any form without contacting Founder/Editor-in-Chief Nikita PowellCottman. All articles have been reviewed and approved by Nikita Powell-Cottman and her editorial team.

This Magazine Published By: We Fight Foundation, Inc First Published, 2018

FOUNDER’S Thoughts

Happy Holidays Everyone!

I pray this time of year is not hard for you and you are able to enjoy the real reason for the season. For some, the holidays and gathering with family bring them joy, but for others, this time of year stirs up unwanted feelings, and some family members are a trigger to those unwanted feelings. Navigating through those complicated emotions about family, relationships, and traditions is difficult. All of the above is a challenge to anyone’s mental health. If this is you, let’s start by giving yourself Grace during this holiday! What does giving yourself Grace mean? I am glad you asked:)

Grace is an integral part of self-care that many forget to do. It reminds you that everything is OK. Grace may look different for everyone. Life has challenges; Grace prevents you from giving up. What Grace looks like for others may look different for you. Instead of being critical of yourself, Grace is choosing to be kind to yourself, striving for

inner peace, recognizing that you are doing the best you can, accepting, honoring your limitations, and truly loving yourself!

We want you to do more than survive this holiday season; we want you to thrive. If we are going to thrive through this season and not end in a deep depression, frustration or feeling burned out; we have to take good care of ourselves! This is why this holiday issue is filled with tips and tools to help you reduce those things that challenge your mental health and help you find joy this season! Enjoy!

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year!

Founder/Editor in Chief

Tips to Boost Your Mood!

By TJ Woodward

There’s a saying that “you feel as good as you look,” so why not take a few minutes out of your day and play makeup? The holidays are the perfect time to try a festive look, boost your mood, and shock your family and friends with a simple but fun makeup look. Here are a few enhancements that you can try at home:

DURING THE HOLIDAYS

in different colors. You can go with the basic black or brown, or try colors like green, blue, and gold to add flair to your look.

Merry Mascara

It’s the holiday season! As a makeup artist and avid makeup wearer, I find the holidays a great time for selfexpression. I like the idea of being able to play up my makeup during this season. Maybe you’re not into makeup because it’s “too complicated” or “it takes too much time.” Wherever you fall, this article is for you.

I’m often asked why I wear makeup every day. I’m also asked how I find the time to be so well “put together” daily. My makeup application time is like a therapy session for me. I put on my music (the genre will depend on my mood), sit in front of my mirror, and feel like all my troubles no longer exist. I look at myself, my features, flaws, imperfections, and beauty, and I embrace them all. I go over, in my head, my plans for the day. I set my day with positive thoughts and affirmations, all while applying my makeup. This small change has significantly impacted my day, and it doesn’t take much. It takes little time.

Fa La La La Liner

Liners are fun and a simple

Mascara is the simplest tip to try to bring out your holiday eye. Just like liners, there are many options to choose from. You have mascara for thickening, lengthening, or both. Mascaras also come in color options, but if you want to play it safe, you can stick with a basic brown or black. A tip to try with mascara to get the “falsie” look is to layer your mascara. Apply your first coat, let dry, and then minutes later, apply a second or third coat, depending on your desired look. Remember to start from the base, extend the lash length, and watch out. *You could also apply a strip lash with glue, or if you’re up for the challenge, you can try the magnetic kind.

Light Up the Lips

enhancement that will bring out your eyes. It also provides options based on your personal preference. You can go with a liquid liner with a felt point making it easier to line the top of your eyelid, or you can go with a pencil that gives a more dramatic look to the eye. You can make this line thin or as thick as you like. Eyeliners also come

You may not feel comfortable with doing your eyes, but a popping lip can light up a room like a Christmas tree. Again, you have many choices when it comes to the lips. You can choose from gloss or lipstick—colors ranging from every color on the color wheel. Red lips will do the trick if you want to stop traffic during the holiday. If you

During the Holidays

are uncomfortable with red, a lovely nude with a brown liner always works. Lining the lips with a lip pencil helps keep your gloss or lipstick in place.

Now that you have your makeup look together, you can complete the look with a basic black dress or jumper and add a pop of color like red or green creating a holiday look that will get your friends and family talking. Here are some items that you can use to add color and complete your look:

A colorful scarf

A hat Shoes Belt

Jewelry

change can make a big difference.

Purge and Restore

By Talona Smith

Have you ever asked yourself, why me? What is my purpose? Will it get better? How am I going to get through this? Why the pain, disappointment, and stress? Why am I depressed? What do I need to do?

You have to purge. Purge negative emotions, people, places, and things from your life. It takes time. It is a process.

Coming out of a sad, depressive, or stressful situation may seem more painful than staying in one. Some stay in situations like these because of fear of the unknown. They are afraid to move outside the familiarity of being sad or in pain. Like, when you stay in a heartbreaking situation, you know not to let yourself expect to be happy; expect good results. So you numb yourself towards expecting anything positive to happen in your life to keep from being disappointed. Long-term uncomfortable situations can become so numbing that you no longer realize the negative toll they can take on your mind, body, and soul.

Has anyone ever told you to fake it until you make it? I don’t know how much improvement faking would create, but it can make you feel you need to be more honest with yourself. And you deserve honesty. Genuine honesty.

Be honest with your emotions to work towards overcoming whatever is hindering you—holding you back.

If you are not feeling well at that moment, it’s okay. Breathe. Focus on something or someone that brings peaceful vibes into your space. Breathe. Straighten your back. Square your shoulders. Hold your head high. Breathe.

Just know that when you choose to seek help, the pain you experience when purging yourself from a troublesome situation is temporary. It’s like a pruning experience. Healing is like pruning a tree. You must trim a tree if any part has a disease, fungus, or decay for it to become healthy. Grow healthy. Sometimes branches are removed to improve sunlight exposure or circulation to other parts of a tree.

Pruning helps trees to become fruitful. Pruning keeps trees healthy.

I can only imagine how painful it would be for a tree to have parts of it cut back, but I do know that the proper pruning process is healthy and doesn’t last long.

Removing stressful, unhappy, abusive, or frustrating situations from yourself is only part of recovery. A process you don’t have to go through alone. Talk to someone you feel comfortable with who can support you when needed. Seek help from a relative, a friend, a doctor, a therapist, someone from church, or even a hotline.

You are important. You are valuable. You are necessary.

ESA LIFE AS A TEEN

By Nina Hollingsworth

hat a teenager could go through so young. Just existing amongst your peers can be challenging, including maintaining self-identity. Before getting my emotional support dog, I spent many days feeling lonely and emotionally cooped up in my room. After getting my ESA (Emotional Support Animal), things felt brighter; when I’m feeling a certain type of way, my dog is always there to cuddle and give me kisses all over my face. Her name is Naiyomi. Every day after school, I have something to look forward to when coming home. Her excitement every time she sees me brings me joy. Since having my ESA dog, I’ve felt like I’ve been breathing a new fresh set of air. My smile is more prominent, and my emotions don’t get me down anymore because my Naiyomi makes me happier.

WThe trick to finding the perfect ESA dog for you is to look up things that you like in a dog, such as “hypoallergenic dog breeds” or “dog breeds that don’t shed” eventually, you’ll find a correlation between the things you’re looking for. If you’re looking for one online instead of in a pet store, make sure it’s legit when going to a site. Avoid getting a dog from a site saying they’re going to ship the dog or something like that. Lean more towards the sites that offer to pick up the dog or meet in person, with accurate contact information and information on the dog you’re looking for. Once you have found the perfect ESA, remember to register them at American Service Pets at https://certification. americanservicepets.com. Overall the process of finding the perfect ESA dog is simple. Just be prepared to get ultimately loved on by your furbaby!

Picture this. You’re traveling home from a long day of work, and while driving home, you imagine a long hot shower, a nice dinner, and the comfort of your bed. After sitting in traffic for an hour, you finally get home, walk in, and poof! The smell of weed hits you right in your face! You immediately ask your child why your house smells like weed, already knowing the answer. You’re thinking, oh no, not my child. I taught them smoking is bad for you and can kill you in the long run.

You’re thinking oh no, weed will hurt my child’s brain development. You ask your child, “have you been smoking” and they are hesitant at first but feel comfortable enough to say, “yes.” Not only do they say yes, but they disclose they have been smoking for a couple of years, and you’re taken aback because you’ve been so naïve. “My child doesn’t smoke; they know better, and I taught them to do the right thing.” So, now what? You find out your child is smoking weed and have no idea how to approach the situation.

Substance Use: A Battle for God

By Vanity Dawson

Communicate. Listen to what your child has to say; listening means being quiet and holding your comments. For example, your child has opened up and admitted to smoking instead of lying about it or continuing to hide it. Thank your child for opening up and calmly reminding them they can talk to you about anything, even the hard conversations.

Provide resources. Share pamphlets about drug use and the effects of different substances with your child.

Pray. Immediately go into prayer because this is also spiritual warfare. Substance use can lead to addiction, and we are against warfare that needs prayer.

Pray over your children and your home. Cover their going and coming to different destinations. Pray against the supplier that their dealing may be blocked.

What you may be facing when it comes to youth and drugs may be challenging, but never challenging enough for the Creator of the heavens and earth, God. He will get you through, and He will get your child through.

STEPHEN

“tWitch” BOSS

By TJ Woodard

Like

so many others, my heart broke at the news surrounding the death of the husband, dad, dancer, and actor affectionately known as “tWitch.” I have been following tWitch since his debut on the hit dance competition show, So You Think You Can Dance. The talent and joy he bought to the stage were like nothing I had ever seen. His unique dance style vividly expressed his passion for his Godgiven ability to dance his heart out while brightening the lives of others. Watching his life change before our eyes, news of this loss stunned the world. We followed him from his marriage to his wife and the birth of his children to his numerous television

and movie roles; we felt like we knew him. He became a fixture on the Ellen show until its expiration and was a celebrity judge on So You Think You Can Dance, which is where it all started. Days before, a holiday show on Disney+ aired with him and his wife as the hosts. They also celebrated their 9th wedding anniversary and danced happily on TikTok.

So what went wrong?

It seemed that Stephen had it all, but there was another story that no one knew. Like many who suffer in silence, he did an excellent job at hiding behind his smile while he suffered in silence.

“Looking at some of his pictures, you can see the sadness behind his eyes”

, often overlooked because a smile and “I’m ok” was all that was enough. There’s speculation surrounding why he decided to take his own life. Some say it was money-related. Others say there were problems at home. Although we search for answers trying to figure out what was going on with the 40-year-old entertainer, sadly enough, we may never know. Even a suicide note left behind may not tell the truth about the troubles, pressures, and demons the dancer may have been fighting while the world depended on him to make them

feel good. Unfortunately, this story is more common than we’d like to admit. Life doesn’t always play fair. Sometimes we feel overwhelmed, anxious, fearful, and want to give up. For a person with a mental illness, these times are more frequent and can be more debilitating. This news is another example of why normalizing mental health conversations and digging deeper into the “I’m ok” is so important. If you are a person who is struggling with thoughts of suicide, please reach out for help. If you know someone who needs help, don’t be afraid to ask difficult questions and get them the help they need. If you are unsure if someone needs help, reach out and find out. We can all do a better job to ensure we don’t lose another life, celebrity, or suicide. Rest in Peace, Stephen “tWitch” Boss, and may your legacy continue to live on through the lives of your children and those you touched. Continue to keep the entire Boss family in prayer along with those who this loss and similar stories have impacted.

Positive Mental Health

Tis the Season to be Jolly?

How the Holidays Affect Our Mental Health

By Sadia Khan

There is no denying it, no matter how independent and self-sufficient we have become as a society. There is no better predictor of general well-being and happiness than our relationships with others. No time highlights these connections’ status other than the upcoming holidays. Although we characterize the holidays with joy and laughter, there is no denying the statistics which show a spike in domestic violence, suicide attempts, and prescription medication. So how can we predict and prevent potential triggers for low moods and a possible decline in mental health?

1. RELATIONSHIPS

There are endless perks to being single during the holidays. For one, you save money. You won’t have to choose between the families you will be with during the holidays. You can even go abroad and enjoy the sun if you wish. However, the nights are cold, and friends tend to get busier and busier with their lives; movies saturate the idea of a romantic

Christmas. Overall, this period can highlight your relationship status. The loneliness of being single or in an unfulfilling relationship can often become unbearable.

The pressure to make plans for the new year starts to sink in.

Not to mention the daunting thought of starting the new year and not knowing with whom you will spend the year.

How To Cope?

Firstly do not hide from your feelings. For example, if you feel lonely or sad about the state of your relationship or lack of a relationship, accept and embrace this feeling. It’s OK not to be OK and not feel pressured to enjoy living the single life. If you do not like it, that’s totally fine. What you feel low about is indicative of what you value in life, so lean into this feeling as this suggests what means the most to you. But then get practical. Ask yourself, what can you do to feel better? My advice is always to set a goal about something other than finding a partner. The by-product of this goal will create the space to

attract a partner, for example, getting in shape, opening your social media, and learning about your attachment style and love language. Hence, you will know what type of partner you need and the one to whom you can or cannot commit.

2. DEFENSIVENESS

When your partner suggests, do you respond with what they need to do for you first? Do you immediately find a reason why you cannot do this? Or find a flaw in them? Being defensive rather than responsive is a high predictor of divorce. The key is if you know your partner gets defensive, try and use soft startups; what this means is before approaching a sensitive topic, you start with “I completely understand you are busy” or “I know you are doing your best, but I would really appreciate it if. . .”

The soft startup will allow your partner to drop their guard and be open to influence.

By being aware of these predictors of divorce, you need to catch yourself when you experience this and redirect your energy more positively. There is no denying it, Christmas has a charm and atmosphere that very few can avoid. Everywhere you turn, there are images of people smiling, excited, and connected to their loved ones. However, we do not see the people who spend the day alone, get into debt, or end their romantic relationships over a drunken fight with their in-laws. These three factors strongly impact our mental health over the holidays.

• Family • Relationships

• Finances

In a world of digital connectedness,

face-to-face time is scarce, and many of us only have the holidays to reconnect with our family physically. The problem with this is if there are any preexisting causes of tension or grudges between siblings or cousins, then the holidays become the only chance to hash those out, and conflict can arise. Most of us can think of at least one Christmas that went left and may have left us in a state of panic, anxiety, and depression for the subsequent weeks or months. Experiences such as these can result in PTSD around the holiday period.

How To Cope?

For the sake of your mental health, try your best to practice the art of forgiveness. Entering the season with negativity and pent-up hostility will only be a burden for you. To squash tension, send a positive text to those you may have issues with to alleviate the situation. Enter the situation with a clean slate; if someone has wronged you, mark your boundaries and do not allow the person to cross them.

3. FINANCES

With the advent of child-centeredness have come many positive outcomes, including a softer, more responsive parenting style. Children are now seen and heard. Their childhood can b seen as a precious developmental stage in which, if parents operate in a dysfunctional manner, the effects can be long-lasting. Hence, most parents try their absolute best to meet their child’s every need. Conversely, there is intense pressure to please children; advertisers know how to hook young minds, and young minds know how to hook parents. Unfortunately, this pressure can result in parents finding themselves in unnecessary debt. How To Cope?

Firstly, remind yourself the most important gift you can give your child

is a relaxed parent. Causing yourself unnecessary stress and anxiety to please them is counterproductive. So, remember, depriving them of certain gifts still gives them a different gist: a happier parent.

Limit social media use and shopping apps around the Christmas holiday. Specifically, apps designed to sell you items you do not need or the ones that show other people buying things they do not need as a form of normative social influence.

Finally, focus the holidays on giving, not receiving; teach your children this is the time to take what they do not need and give it to those less fortunate. They will feel the joy of philanthropy and save themselves some financial woes.

MHCA|MENTALHEALTH CHANGE AGENT

ANA’NEICIA WILLIAMS

LCSW,PMH-C

“And the Lord answered me: Write the vision, and make it plain on tablets, that he who reads it may run.”

Habukuk 2:2

RUM: Tell us about your work as it relates to mental health and wellness.

Ana’Neicia: I promote and invest in individuals, families, and communities’ mental well-being. I offer individual therapy and coaching to assist women and mothers in identifying what womanhood and or motherhood looks like for them—educating my community on the benefits of investing in therapeutic practices to care for themselves. There is a vast misunderstanding of what therapy is and does, so I find myself bringing awareness to daily conversations.

RUM: You are doing incredible and vital work supporting Black mothers before, during, and after childbirth! What has been the most challenging

part of the work you do? What has been the most rewarding?

Ana’Neicia: Thank you! It is an honor to serve Black mothers. With great reward comes much responsibility, which is why I value holding space for them. Many complexities and intersections of Black women contribute to this work’s challenge and reward. Holding space for Black women that are impacted by many systemic issues can be heavy. Often, by the time an individual gets to a session with me, there is much to explore and unpack. I am so appreciative that Black women allow me to support them through some of their most challenging events and experiences. Helping them reach a level of comfort to release the strong Black woman narrative is an art of work to witness. Even though I see the beauty in our

shared space, it saddens me at times that they must return to the same oppressive environments that cause them to operate in survival mode. This work truly requires community care, and I’m working towards offering more of those spaces.

RUM: Do you have any advice for our readers who may be feeling anxiety around becoming a mother or are already mothers?

Ana’Neicia: Absolutely! Anxious feelings around becoming a mom or navigating motherhood are normal. It’s your body and mind communicating with you. You must be mindful of what messages you accept in the process. Messages lead to thoughts, and your thoughts can lie to you if you let them. Your thoughts can have

©️

Photo Credit: Denisha McCauley Photography

you questioning your capabilities, worthiness, or worst-case scenarios regarding motherhood. Know that you have the ability to silence the thoughts that do not serve you with practice. I see so much anxiety within those I serve, and I assist them in redefining their perception of motherhood to create the version that fits them. The moment one understands and grasps this concept, one can offer themselves grace and permission to learn.

RUM: Self-care and prioritizing oneself is radical, especially for Black women. What are some ways you prioritize yourself and practice self-care?

Ana’Neicia: I listen to my body. It’s easy to ignore what we feel and push through, but I am not a fan of the push-through culture. I will disengage and disconnect as I see fit. That’s my boundary, and I am okay if someone does not accept that. Self-care is not selfish, and I’ve learned not to play about me over the years. I also indulge in play often, whether in solitude or community. There is so much value in finding what works for you, and I’m grateful that even in discomfort,

I will still find ways to honor myself with self-care.

RUM: Where do you see Momology Maternal Wellness Club in the next five years? Are there any other projects you are working on?

Ana’Neicia: Growing, glowing and global! I will expand Momology in due time and offer full-service therapeutic experiences that cater to mothers and fathers. Once I align with the right

individuals, the Momology team will be accessible to many near and far.

I am so excited about many projects in motion that it gives me chills. I can not share everything just yet, but I’m currently working on my doctorate in social work, where my work is centered on Black motherhood, and it will be integrated into the practice. I am currently working on a candle product branded under Momology too. We are gearing up for the Second Annual MOMnic event that will take place in May of 2023 to honor Mother’s Day. Many other projects will be revealed in

due time, but the best way to stay informed is to connect with us on social media.

RUM: Any final words for our readers?

Ana’Neicia: Yes, know that It is your birthright to experience mental wellness, so please do not undervalue the time and investment you put into your care of self. When you begin to understand how to care for your overall mental well-being,.

You can show up for yourself fully and offer care to your community.

©️

Photo Credit: Denisha McCauley Photography

I’m Tired... EXPRESSIVE ART CORNER EXPRESSIVE ART CORNER

By Kimberly Whitmon

It means just that… WE MFN TIIIRRREEEDDD!!!.. But not like I need sleep tired.

I’m tired... of the constant negative thoughts, the incessant worrying about everything that has happened and everything that will.

I’m tired... of having to take medication, of forgetting to take my medication and then having to readjust to that medication.

Let’s not get into getting tired of trying to find the right cocktail to begin with.

I’m tired... of getting overstimulated.

Tired of isolating myself from my loved ones and leaving relationships in the wake of my path of destruction.

I’m tired... of constantly having to pay attention to my mood. I have to be hyper-vigilant about every damn thing. What I’m doing, eating, and drinking and how is it going to affect my mood.

I’m tired of having a morphed perception of my body, my abilities, myself; obsessing over details that people probably don’t notice. And then NEVER forgetting the embarrassing feelings that come along with obsession.

I’m tired of having to act like I’m ok cuz... you have one lil funky a$$ episode...and now every little tear might be cause for hospitalization.

These are just a few things that we get ‘tired’ of.

Just know when a person with any type of mental illness tells you they’re tired, just know they are probably NOT talking about sleep

Expressive arts are powerful ways for people to express their emotions. Those who suffer from mental health issues, such as depression, anxiety, etc., can also benefit from expressive arts therapy. Many people use poems, narratives, and other spoken words to promote well-being and healing. It is a multimodal approach that utilizes various methods, including writing, music, visual arts, drama, and dance, to help people achieve personal growth.

Could That Worry Be Generalized Anxiety?

By Amanda Fludd, LCSW-R

Everyone experiences anxiety, from the flutters giving a presentation the nerves before taking a test, to the constant thoughts of if your loved one is safe. But if you seem to worry on most days and struggle to control those feelings, you may have generalized anxiety disorder or GAD.

It’s called “generalized” because you worry and feel anxious about everything rather than one specific event. What makes this stand out from typical worry is how long you’ve had this experience. If you’ve been experiencing consistent concern about things (like doing well on exams, if you’ll advance in your career if the kids are safe) or have this general feeling that something terrible will happen for six months or longer, it could be GAD.

What You Need to Know About GAD

It can develop as a child or an adult and may look like this:

• Persistent worrying or Anxiety about several things that seem out of proportion to the impact of the event

• Overthinking plans and always coming up with the worst-case scenario

• Believing situations and events are threatening or dangerous even with

no fact that they will be

• You can’t handle uncertainty and have trouble making decisions

• Always afraid you’ll make the wrong decision.

• Difficulty concentrating

• It’s hard to let go of the worries

• Feel like you have to be the “strong one” and keep it together for everyone, all the time.

Outside of trouble letting go of your worries, here are some other physical symptoms you may experience:

• Always tired

• Trouble falling asleep or staying asleep

• Developing Anxiety and tension-related ailments, such as tension headaches, stomach aches, or chronic muscle pain

• Sweating

• Heart racing or a sense of panic

• Nausea, diarrhea, or irritable bowel syndrome

• Irritability

Anxiety is among the most common mental health conditions, and it can simply feel like a fear that makes the most simple thing feel impossible, making us over-prepare or hold back, slowing our growth. For people of color, this is often our experience as we are in a heightened state of stress, often don’t feel “good enough,” and are forever worried for our well-being and safety- but that doesn’t mean it’s okay to feel this way. Yet many Black people fear mental health stigma and suffer silently at home.

How many of these can you relate to?

How many people in your family can you think of “worry themselves sick”? Or constantly “bruise their knees” with prayer over the same issue? Or never get off the couch,

or use drugs are alcohol to “calm their nerves”? We sometimes see Anxiety or any other emotional issue as a problem the person can help or change with the right attitude and prayer- and there is room for that in your healing. Still, some conditions require Jesus, some tested tools and interventions, and someone who specializes in Anxiety and recognizes and respects your culture, including the role of race and trauma in the black and brown experience.

If you want to learn more about Anxiety or different anxiety disorders, visit the Anxiety and Depression Association of America’s website at www.adaa.org. They have helpful information about Anxiety and a helpline that you can call if you have any questions or concerns. To read more on how to overcome fear and Anxiety, visit us here. You can also talk to your doctor about your Anxiety, and they can help you develop a treatment plan or find a local Psychotherapist.

Contact & Reference info on pg 23.

Dear Amanda,

Q: Since the season started to change, I have been in a funk. My house is messy, and I need more energy and mental space to organize stuff and clean up. I am trying to figure out where to start to get out of this funk. Help? (Anonymous, Washington, D.C.)?

A: The season’s change can sometimes signal a difference in how we feel and, consequently, make it harder for us to get things done, triggering a funk. It’s common as our days get longer and it gets darker quickly. For some people who experience ongoing sadness or a “funk” for extended periods, it could be something called Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD).

Signs to look out for that it could be something more:

• Low energy on most days

• Trouble sleeping

• Changes in your appetite or weight

• Sluggishness or agitation

• Feeling hopeless, worthless or guilty

• Decreased motivation

• It happens every winter and sometimes in the spring or spring-to-summer seasons

We don’t really know what causes SAD, but it’s suspected it’s connected to less access to sunlight, which leads to a decrease in serotonin which triggers feelings of depression and even a decrease in melatonin which is vital for good sleep and your mood. It almost sounds like we are preparing for hibernation, except we still have life to do.

When you aren’t feeling your best, it can be hard to give energy to everyday tasks like taking care of your home, socializing, or even the things that may help you feel good. Knowing this, it’s a good idea to plan and be intentional with where and how you spend your time.

Since we need more sunlight, try to get out more during the day. Take your lunch

break and go for a walk or open up the curtains and get some vitamin D. Pay attention to the times of the day when you may have more energy and capitalize on that. During high-energy times, tackle high-energy tasks, if even for a few minutes. I like to set a timer and clean in the mornings.

It’s also a good time to be realistic about what you can do. Instead of aiming to get to the gym daily, cut back to twice a week. Instead of retreating to your covers when you have free time, still create time for feel-good moments like going to brunch with a friend, even if it is once a month. The idea is to lower the bar on expectations, reduce the guilt of not doing, and leave space to do as much as you can for the season.

Make sure to reach out to us on IG @ Rallyupmagazine and let us know how you decided to navigate this season!

All the best, Amanda Fludd, LCSW-R for Rallyup Magazine

You can find me at www.intagram. com/therapyisdope

REFERENCE

https://adaa.org/find-help/by-demographics/black-african-american-communities www.therapyforblackmen.org https://www.inclusivetherapists.com/ www.cliniciansofcolor.org

Amanda Fludd, LCSW-R is a Licensed Psychotherapist, Mental Health Consultant, Speaker, and Mindset Coach to High Achieving Entrepreneurs. Find her on Instagram @amanda.fludd, @therapyisdope, or www.amandafludd.com.

Reference: Five Actionable Steps to Overcome Fear and Anxiety by Amanda Fludd: https://amandafludd.com/2022/04/21/steps-to-overcome-fear-and-anxiety/

Mental Illness 2 Mental Wellness

By: Dr. Robert A. Johnson, MA, LPC, LMHC-S, CCM, GCDF, DHA

ALWAYS WAKE UP IN PRAYER, POSITIVITY, AND PERSISTENCE TO CHANGE YOUR LIFE AND OTHERS.”

These are the words that Dr. Robert A. Johnson, III, lives by in his life. Dr. Johnson has served in many firsts, such as being the youngest and first Black male to work in a state agency Medicaid- Hospitals Division, and being the first Black male in a thriving counseling private group practice. In addition, Dr. Johnson is the Top 1 percent of Licensed Black Male Therapists in South and North Carolina (border states}. Dr. Johnson focuses and specializes in the treatment of schizophrenia, depression, mood disorders, anxiety, adjustment disorders, PTSD, anger/ stress management, intellectual and developmental disabilities, Christian counseling, life, business, and job coaching, vocational and occupational problems, couples/marital counseling, and family therapy.

Mental Illness has shown an enormous increase amid the pandemic; however, this disabling condition has impacted numerous in silence. This condition is due to the myths of Mental Illness, poor education, and limited resources related to treatment. It is becoming partly accepted today because Mental Illness has numerous different faces, races, socioeconomic statuses, and many other factors. The focus is establishing supports and systems to provide education and creating treatment methods to combat mental Illness. The question is, how do we move from Mental Illness to mental wellness?

How Does Mental Illness Look?

Mental Illness comes in numerous forms, from isolation to painting a picture of happiness. Yet, Mental Illness is common in the general population. Mental Illness impacts our thoughts, body, and soul. The key to overcoming mental Illness is treatment, systems that yield resources that lead to healthy support systems.

What is Mental Wellness?

Mental wellness is acknowledging, encouraging, empowering, focusing, advocating, taking responsibility, engaging, and being initiative-taking in being your most healthy self. The question that comes to mind is how to do this in the area of our mental wellness. Here are some suggestions:

“The Process of Moving from Mental Illness to Mental Wellness”

It is vital to understand the importance of healthy eating. Our bodies live off fuel that produces the energy that yields from the types of foods that we put in our bodies. Always consult your primary care doctor, nutritionist and/or dietician to assist you in creating a wellbalanced diet for you and maintain accountability.

2Engaging yourself in physical activity/exercise can increase your energy. Physical activity/exercise is a part of self-care and helps center your focus. Sometimes, we can get overwhelmed, highly stressed and/or highly anxious; however, engagement in physical activity/exercise helps to reduce those stressors. This type of engagement requires consistency, commitment, and a plan tailored to meet your needs.

Sleep’s importance is pivotal to your mood and thought process. The recommendation is to get between six to eight hours of sleep. Sleep is critical to the promotion of mental wellness. 4

Limit your engagement in alcohol and other substances that may be harmful to your body. Consider the side effects it may have on your body, including the impact or altering of your mood and overall functioning. Remember to take care of yourself and your well-being to promote healthy mental wellness. 5

Levels of connection are essential to your mental wellness. We are currently living through a pandemic,

which has impacted our engagement level; however, thinking outside the box with socially distanced, safe ways to engage is crucial. Thinking outside of the box can range from a virtual book club to phone conversations and other creative events with limited capacities, to name a few. Having a sense of belonging during this time can improve your mental wellness.

Anytime you feel in crisis, please do not hesitate to to call or text 988, you’ll connect with mental health professionals with the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, formerly known as the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline.

Remember you are not in this alone in this life; you are moving forward to your best life, from “Mental Illness to Mental Wellness!”

6

Enjoy the outside, breathe, and meditate. Meditation and nature can contribute to your overall mental wellness by enjoying the sun, feeling the energy outside, and being in the moment.

Most importantly, connecting with your spirituality and the importance of your being. Having a spiritual connection allows us to understand our blessings, being, and being grateful. Take time for this moment. 8

7

It is also important in the pandemic to release ourselves from technology that can impact our thoughts and space. Release yourself from this energy with moderation. 9

It is always crucial for you to engage in ongoing education and resources related to improving your mental wellness. Expanding your knowledge will allow you to understand specific best practices that you can apply in your life. 10

Always remember that there is help for you. Always understand asking for help is the most effective way to improve your mental wellness.

Remember You are not in this alone.

Mydiagnosisdo esnotdefneme Mydiagnosisdo esnotdefneme

Photo credit Omari Photo

RUM: Describe your work as it relates to mental health and wellness.

CHARITA: I am the author of the memoir, Defying the Verdict: My Bipolar Life (Curbside Splendor Publishing.) I have been an active member of the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), since 2015. NAMI is the nation’s largest grassroots mental health organization. Our mission is to “improve the lives of people living with mental health conditions, their families, and communities through education, support, and advocacy.” I have served on the NAMI Maryland Board of Directors since 2018 and actively volunteer with my local affiliate, NAMI Metropolitan Baltimore. I was featured at NAMI’s National Convention, NAMICON 2021, in the short documentary, Shattering Racial Stereotypes to Defy the Verdict: https://youtu.be/LyarbNfJ72s. I was also awarded NAMI Metropolitan Baltimore’s 2021 Marcia G. Pines Lifetime Advocacy and Service Award for furthering NAMI’s mission. I strive to cure mental healthcare stigma by sharing my story and have given keynote presentations for The Morgan State University Psychology Department, The Alpha Phi Sigma Criminal Justice Honor Society and other organizations.

RUM: What was it like to get a bipolar diagnosis in college? Specifically, how did you come to the decision that you needed help?

CHARITA: When I received my accurate Bipolar I disorder diagnosis in 1980, I was committed to a state psychiatric facility by two doctors in Connecticut who diagnosed my manic state as so severe that I was dangerous to myself and others. I remained in the facility for fifteen days until the mania subsided. At that time, I saw the episode as an anomaly and prayed that GOD would allow me to die rather than have that happen again. That is spiritual suicidal ideation. When I lived, I wrongly assumed I would never experience mania again.

I wasn’t aware that I had inherited my grandmother’s bipolar (manic depressive) illness. Clothed in shame, I took a semester off from school, returning to complete my senior year of college from 1981 to 1982.

In March of 1982, two months before receiving my bachelor’s degree, I had a psychotic episode frighteningly reminiscent of my grandmother’s

breakdown and subsequent hospitalization that I had witnessed in my childhood. Two friends of mine escorted me home to Baltimore by train, where my family could get me proper treatment.

In Baltimore, my parents and I were informed that I was experiencing the maturing form of bipolar disorder.

Translation: My episodes would become more and more severe until I could eventually require a caregiver. I was not expected to finish college or to marry and have children. This was the death knell for me. Up to this point in my life, I prided myself on my academic achievements. I mistakenly equated having bipolar disorder with not being smart. And I’d always looked forward to marrying and having a family. That March, I ended up being committed to a state psychiatric facility –this time in Maryland—for a second time. The reason was the same as time number one: doctors deemed me dangerous to myself and others. Fall of 1983, I was committed again, having taken myself off the medication that was working for me. This commitment was

As Galatians 2:20 declares: “I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless, I live; yet not I but Christ lives in me: and the life that I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of GOD who loved me and gave Himself for me.”

followed by a three-year recovery period in which I followed all medical protocols: I regularly saw a psychiatrist and therapist and adhered to my medication regimen. I thought those dreaded episodes were over.

In 1986, I recognized a shift to the mania for the first time. My friends took me to my therapist, who arranged for me to be hospitalized. This treatment was different from my prior inpatient stays because, for the

first time, I felt that my illness was being treated. In the state hospitals, I felt I was being housed until the medication could kick in so the mania would subside and I could return home. I never left the state hospitals with a hopeful prognosis. Once I was released from the hospital in 1987, I reached out to a pastoral counselor I once worked with from 1982-1983. That earlier therapeutic process was unsuccessful because I was unwilling to do the healing work.

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Photo credit Omari Photo

Though I’d endured treatment, I had never accepted my bipolar diagnosis. Once I had accepted the diagnosis, I spent two and a half years with my therapist, processing and discarding anything in my psyche that might hinder my progress. Together, we created a wellness plan that I adopted and have continued to use successfully throughout my life.

At the end of the process, I married my wonderful and anointed husband, Oscar William Brown, Jr. Together; we gave life to two beautiful daughters. Oscar passed away after two and a half years of marriage. I grieved but did not have a bipolar episode. My daughters have grown to be stable and kind women.

RUM: Do you have advice for college-aged readers experiencing a mental health challenge?

CHARITA: Yes. Know that it is okay not to be okay. Acknowledge what you are going through and create a wellness plan. As my husband, Oscar, would say, “Plan your work and work your plan. Do not feel like you have to plow through by yourself.” I, personally, have never seen anyone get well alone. Some people benefit from a therapist’s expertise. Others need a friend who will listen without judgment as you externally process what you’re going through.

RUM: What does self-care mean to you? What are three ways you practice self-care?

CHARITA: Self-care is prioritizing your physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual health. The Native American axiom calls these the four rooms. It says we should go in each room daily if only to air them out. Three ways I practice self-care:

1Setting healthy boundaries and adhering to them. “No” is a complete sentence.

2Pause and breathe.

3Feel my feelings fully. I recognize how I am feeling. Sit in the emotion. Then let it pass. I’ve learned that suppressing emotions is not good for my health. It negatively impacts each of my four rooms.

5Explain “Mental Health is Physical Health.” Our brains are a part of our bodies and should be acknowledged as such. Just as we would get a broken arm reset. We should prioritize a balanced mind. When we need a mental health tune-up, we should take advantage of resources to stabilize our mental and emotional health. This sometimes requires a mindset shift to accept that mental health is indeed physical health. Therefore, it should be our daily priority.

RUM: Any final words?

CHARITA: Rather than needing a caregiver, I became an assisted living style care manager for both my parents as they aged in place in their own home. My father, Leonard E. Cole, passed away in December 2019. My siblings and I are blessed by our ninety-year-old mother, Anita H. Cole’s presence with us. I glorify GOD for the enjoyable, high-quality life I have in Him. As Galatians 2:20 declares: “I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless, I live; yet not I but Christ lives in me: and the life that I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of GOD who loved me and gave Himself for me.”

To learn more about Charita Cole Brown and Defying the Verdict: My Bipolar Life, visit www.charitacolebrown.com

Charita Cole Brown was diagnosed with a severe form of bipolar disorder while finishing her final semester as an English major at Wesleyan University. Doctors predicted she would never lead a “normal” life. Despite that pessimistic prognosis and because she sought treatment, Charita went on to marry, raise a family, earn a masters degree in teaching and enjoy a fulfilling career in education. Her powerful story is chronicled in her award-winning debut book, Defying the Verdict: My Bipolar Life (Curbside Splendor Publishing 2018).

Bipolar disorder –formerly known as manic depression— is highly treatable. However, of the estimated 5.7 million Americans living with the disorder, over 50% won’t seek treatment. The fact that the US suicide rate for people who have bipolar disorder is 12 times higher than that of the general population is even more sobering.

Charita Cole Brown earned a BA in English from Wesleyan University and an MAT in Early Childhood Education from Towson University in Maryland. A retired educator, she is now a member of the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) Maryland Board of Directors and is also active in the local affiliate, NAMI Metropolitan Baltimore.

Brown strives to cure mental healthcare stigma by sharing her story. She has given keynote presentations for the Morgan State University Psychology Department and the Alpha Phi Sigma Criminal Justice Honor Society. Besides her active involvement in mental health education, she currently manages assisted living style care for her elderly mother and served on the Baltimore City Commission for Women.

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Photo credit Omari Photo

COPING DURING The Holidays

By TJ Woodward

The holiday season is upon us. For many, it is a festive and exciting time of the year. It is the time of year we look forward to with all the holiday decorating, shopping, and parties. For others, not so much. This season can bring sadness, anxiety, and depression. Days are shorter, nights are longer, and loneliness and grief can show up in uninviting ways. The holiday season can trigger emotions that may have been suppressed throughout the year. Seasonal depression is real; it can feel like someone hit the light switch off. We must be intentional in looking after our friends and loved ones during this time. This list can include those we haven’t talked to in a while, and our strong friends and family members are not exempt. If you are someone who struggles during this time, I would like to encourage you to reach out and connect. Help is available, and you do not have to suffer in silence or go through this season alone.

Reasons for Mental Health Challenges During the Holidays

• Financial Concerns

• Stress & Anxiety

• Grief/Loss

• Family/Relationships Trouble

There are ways to cope and help others manage their mental health during the holiday season. Here are some suggestions.

1

| Prepare in Advance

If this time of year is challenging for you or those around you, try putting some things in place that might help with coping. Planning a schedule of events or setting up therapy sessions might be an excellent place to start. Addressing any feelings of anxiety and triggers upfront might also be a good idea.

2 | Connection is Key

Stay connected. Depression and other mental health issues can increase with isolation. Reaching out to your friends and family might be a good idea if they do not contribute to your anxiety or stress. Consider getting out and attending an event or two and seeing how you feel. If you find you are more comfortable at home, maybe invite a few friends to

celebrate with you. Being alone is not bad as long as you are in a good place.

3 | It’s all about Balance

The holidays can be a bit overwhelming with the demands of shopping for others, event invites, and the pressure of doing things you may not want to do. Some people tend to take on more to keep busy while attempting to avoid the holidays altogether. Balance is essential, especially during the holidays. Staying active is a great way to fight depression and anxiety during the holidays. However, taking time to rest is also wise. This time of rest is the reason why having balance works so well. Although things can become overwhelming, a healthy mix of activity and rest can help you cope.

4 | Avoid Triggers

We must limit access to anyone or anything that can trigger an emotional or mental setback. Again, this list can include family members and friends. Try to focus on good memories and things that bring you joy. Remember, this season is only temporary. Take a deep breath…you will get through this! These are a few tips on how to care for your

mental health during the holiday season. Many of us experience mental health challenges during the holidays, which can be stressful.

TJ Woodard is a certified ICF Life & Business Coach. She is a devoted advocate for mental health awareness and suicide prevention. She is also an active duty service Airman, podcaster, mentor and 4x Amazon’s Bestselling author and has helped push many others into their purpose. For more information, visit www. tamikawoodard.com

Make this an enjoyable holiday season by focusing on the good things and the people you have around you.

& HEALTH

Oshēn Salmon RECIPE

Active Time 45 MIN Total Time 1 HR 15 MIN Yield SERVES : 6 to 8

This holiday season, RallyUp Magazine would like to bring some recipes that are good for your mental health and add to your meal with your friends and family. Our first-holiday recipe comes from Oshēn Salmon. It is a Sweet Spiced Rosemary and Maple Salmon. This recipe is simple, and preparation can be therapeutic. Once it is all said and done, you’ll have a dish that will make you proud. down and cook, turning the shrimp halfway through, until the shrimp and shellfish are cooked through and all of the liquid.

INGREDIENTS

2 Oshēn Salmon fillets or 1 pound of fresh Oshēn Salmon

1/3 cup of low-sodium soy sauce

Your choice of fresh rosemary seasoning

1/4 cup orange juice

1 teaspoon kosher salt

1/2 cup maple syrup

1/4 teaspoon black pepper 1 tablespoon olive oil Black and white sesame seeds

HOW TO MAKE IT

Step 1

Preheat oven to 400 degrees. In the meantime, whisk together the maple syrup, soy sauce, orange juice, salt, and pepper in a medium-sized bowl.

Step 2

Place the salmon flesh-side down in the sauce and let sit for 15 minutes. While waiting, line a large baking sheet with parchment paper.

Step 3

After 15 minutes, place the salmon on the parchment-lined baking sheet and drizzle with olive oil. Add pinches of rosemary seasoning on top. Place the sheet pan in the oven.

Step 4

Roast the salmon for 10-15 minutes or until flaky.

Step 5

While the salmon cooks, pour the remaining maple sauce into a small saucepan and bring to a boil over high heat. Cook for about 5 minutes or until the sauce has reduced into a glaze.

Step 6

Remove the salmon from the oven and drizzle the glaze over the top. Add sesame seeds for an extra crunch. Pair it with vegetables, such as roasted carrots or broccolini.

Enjoy To connect with Oshen Salmon for more information on this recipe and more, you can follow them on IG @OshenSalmon

& Wellness

Blackened Ceaser Salad RECIPE

Active Time 20 MIN Total Time 20 MIN Yield SERVES : 4

Having a healthy diet is essential to your mental health. What you eat can decrease anxiety and improve your mood. Here are some foods that can reduce anxiety, along with a recipe you might like to try. Here are a few suggestions to help improve your mental health and a quick and easy recipe for you to try.

Kale & Salmon – Contains Omega-3, which is known to reduce anxiety, thus lowering the risk of depression.

Green Tea – Has L-theanine, known to have a calming effect helping to promote relaxation.

Tumeric – Has active ingredient curcumin, boosts dopamine, and has an antidepressant effect.

Eggs – Contain tryptophan that helps boosts serotonin improving brain function and relieving anxiety.

Chamomile Tea – Has medicinal properties helping to calm nerves and assist with sleep and relaxation.

Avocado – Has B6 and Folate, which helps to regulate mood and sleep.

INGREDIENTS

4 6 oz. salmon filets

1 tsp Garlic powder

8 cups Kale

1/2 cup Caesar dressing, Creamy

2 tbsp Lemon juice

1 1/8 tsp Black pepper

1/2 tsp Cayenne pepper

1 1/2 tbsp Paprika

1 tsp Salt

1/2 tbsp Oil

1/2 tsp Cumin

1 cup Croutons

1/4 cup Parmesan cheese

In a small bowl, combine blackened seasoning. Rub seasoning all over the salmon generously.

Heat oil in a large nonstick skillet over medium-high heat. Once the skillet is nice and hot, carefully add salmon.

Cook the salmon for about 3-4 minutes until the bottom is blackened (not burnt, see photo). Then, flip the salmon over and cook for another 3-4 minutes until blackened—Cook salmon through to an internal temperature of about 125 degrees.

When done, remove salmon from skillet and transfer to plate. Squeeze a little lemon juice over cooked salmon.

Add chopped kale and drizzle a few tablespoons of Caesar dressing in a large bowl. Sprinkle with croutons, shaved parmesan, and cracked black pepper and toss to combine.

Enjoy!

Photo credit and Recipe can be found on https://amandacooksandstyles.com/blackened-salmon-caesar-salad/

Fresh homemade Kale Caesar Salad recipe topped with seared blackened salmon topped with creamy Caesar dressing, croutons, freshly shaved parmesan, and cracked black pepper