Eleven/Therapy is Dope!

BY AMANDA FLUDD, LCSW-R @therapyisdope

The average amount of time it takes for someone to recognize the onset of mental illness and seek help is eleven years. That equates to about 57% of the adult population with a mental health issue not receiving any kind of support. As a result, that early episode of sadness, anxiety, negative self-worth, or disconnecting from reality, turns into a lasting illness, inpatient hospitalization, and a lifetime of revolving-door psychiatric admissions. It’s like having an episode of difficulty breathing, which then turns into constant shortness of breath when left untreated, when all you needed to do was get it assessed and take your asthma pump regularly so you can breathe. Why don’t you deserve to breathe?

Instead, our communities hold this unrelenting narrative “it will be ok,” “there is nothing wrong with you,” “talk to Jesus,” or therapy is “a white people thing and not for us.”

We take that anchor to our strength and choose to endure like we’ve done for generations through poverty, homelessness, incarceration and substance abuse (all factors that create a risk for poor mental health). Traumatic stress increases our risk for physical health conditions (e.g. obesity and diabetes) because trauma is stored in the body and contributes to a shortened life span. So maybe this narrative does not serve any area in our lives, and the resistance and outright shaming of mental health is the antithesis of everything we stand for.

MYTH #1: GOING TO THERAPY IS A SIGN OF WEAKNESS

It’s our nature to demonstrate strength by holding things in and dealing with them ourselves until we are in crisis. It’s the fear of what others will think or of the unknown that keeps us in the dark, or even the downright distrust of the medical field. If you are going to therapy, this means that you are taking the time to learn how to cope with life in healthier ways. Remember - you can find a therapist that more closely represents who you are. Take for examples www.therapyforblackgirls.com and www.therapyforblackmen.org. Becoming purposefully vulnerable with the intent of repairing emotional damage is absolutely admirable.

MYTH #2: THERAPY IS FOR THE RICH

I'm thrilled to report that the idea of rich people only being able to afford therapy is also a myth! Most insurance plans cover mental health services, and there are affordable websites like openpathcollective.com. Paying out-of-pocket is an option that some people utilize because they elect not to use their insurance, or they want more specialized support that insurance will not cover. Online therapy is also a modern trend that creates an option of convenience. Whichever route you choose, double check the therapist’s credentials. You should work with a licensed therapist or one who is supervised by a licensed therapist. Therapy is worth paying for. It’s just like distinguishing a generic product from a brand one - it demonstrates experience, quality, and style. You get what you pay for.

MYTH #3: THERAPY IS A WASTE OF TIME

You may be thinking, "Therapy is a waste of time. How can a complete stranger help me work through my deeply rooted issues?” To that I respond, “Well, is what you’re doing now working?” While the speed of progress is a case-by-case basis, there is no denying that therapy is anything but a waste of time. To make the most out of therapy, be consistent, do your homework in between sessions, and remember that your therapist is not a mind reader! The more you open up about what you want to address, the better the outcome will likely be. Therapy is work, but it also took work (and time) for you to end up in the position you may be in now.

MYTH #4: BLACK PEOPLE DON’T GO TO THERAPY

Actually, they do. About 80% of my practice is composed of people who are African American and Afro-Caribbean. While most clients are women, we also have male clients. The stigma around mental health is changing, especially for children of immigrants, those with higher education and those who live in large cities like NYC and Atlanta.

At the end of the day, we all deal with issues and have skeletons in our closets. Looking for help is not a sign that you are broken, and the world of help is just as dynamic, creative, colorful, and hopeful as you. Let’s close the gap of time and get the tools we need to speak our minds and live healthier lives.