Buzz Magazine: Jan. 10, 2013 by Buzz Magazine

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VOL11 NO1

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january 10, 2013

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365 to do

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predictions

sled in cu

movie review

winter activities in cu

calendar

What we thought of Django Unchained.

Don't be a bum this winter.

Your guide to this week's events in CU.

on readbuzz.com Arts & Entertainment: Check out what’s going on in the fashion world with Emily’s latest runway column! Online now!

Food & Drink: Feeling guilty about how you ate in November and December? You should be. Go relive your shame, your delicious, mouth-watering shame, on readbuzz.com right now.

Movies & TV: Check out our TV Roundtable where four buzz writers gossip about the show Gossip Girl.

Community: There’s a goblin poisoning the watering hole! Just kidding! There’s something much more exciting going on in YOUR community right now! Go to readbuzz.com and see!

THE217.COM 2 buzz January 10-16, 2013

Music: Check out a new Records We Dissed on Awolnation’s Megalithic Symphony.

We l co m e b a c k ! Happy New Year! We made it through the apocalypse! I can’t believe it’s already 2013. Not sure where all the time goes, but wherever that magical place is, I’d like to hang out there for a few days and swindle some back to hold on to for a rainy day. Or to add into my probable future zero vacation days. This year is going to be an exciting one. I know that’s what everyone says at the beginning of every new year — kind of like what I tell myself at the beginning of every summer vacation since I was eight years old and then I end up just being a bum — but real talk, friends. This year is going to be bomb.com. Firstly, I’m about to graduate and thus will no longer be a snotty undergraduate student, but rather, a grown-ass woman/adult with a REAL college degree. Holla! I’m glad all that work that I put in over the last 3.5 years will provide me with not one, but two very real pieces of paper that I can hang on my wall for all to gaze upon (AKA my parents)! Secondly, because I will soon be a college graduate, I can now do whatever the hell I want in t-minus six months, including pretending to be Dustin Hoffman if that tickles my fancy. Thirdly, my tenure here at buzz will be coming to a close in a couple months and there will be a new editor-in-chief, which is always exciting. However, we’ve got some badass issues between now and then so don’t get too upset just yet. Realistically though, I am a little nervous to be heading out into the great unknown of job searches, pantyhose (yeah, right) and living at home with my parents (maybe). But it’s equally exciting that I really can do anything my little heart desires. I’ve never had this opportunity in my life: having no more “obligations,” so to speak. I did apply to grad school as a backup plan, but even that is now a decision, not a requirement. Especially recently, I’ve been struggling to decide what I want to do, not what I should be doing with my life, which is easier said than done. So far, I’ve got a couple ideas a’brewin’ for things that I’ve always wanted to do (more on that to come in the future). I've never really sat down and thought about what I wanted — I was, and to some degree, still am, caught up in what I should be doing, namely doing well in school and actually graduating this coming May instead of goofing off and carpe-ing my diems like a boss. If you’ve got suggestions, I’ll take ‘em, even though this is my life, not yours! Happy 2013, everyone. May this year be the year all your dreams come true!

Babble babble

HEADS UP!

LIKES, GRIPES & YIKES Jasmine Lee Food & Drink EditorJASMINE LEE Food & Drink Editor Likes

ILLINOIS HIGH SCHOOL THEATER FESTVAL BY THOMAS THOREN The 38th annual gathering of thespians known as the Illinois High School Theatre Festival kicks off Thursday, Jan. 10, and runs through Saturday, Jan. 12. It is hailed as the largest and oldest non-competitive high school theater festival in the world. More than 4,000 students, teachers and volunteers from dozens of high schools will showcase many different productions and help with more than 150 workshops. During the 34th annual festival, in 2009, I was walking down Sixth Street on an icy, cold day when a husky, underdressed boy stopped me and asked where “Krannert” is. Thinking he must have meant the art museum due to our proximity, I began to point him there before catching myself and realizing he was part of the recent influx of drama students. The boy, wearing gym shorts and a hooded sweatshirt, was shivering and bright red in the cheeks, so I asked him if he was all right to make it across campus. He insisted, so I relented, but I’ve always wondered if that boy ever made it across the frozen Quad tundra. Or was it all an act? Perhaps part of his upcoming performance? No, he was too young. Method acting for a different role? I’ll never know, but if you read this, boy, I hope you survived that episode and came out stronger for it. If, on the other hand, you didn’t make it unscathed, then I am making all of this up and don’t know what you are talking about.

BUZZ STAFF

COVER DESIGN Chelsea Choi EDITOR IN CHIEF Samantha Bakall MANAGING EDITOR Nick Martin ART DIRECTOR Michael Zhang ASSISTANT ART DIRECTOR: Tyler Schmidt COPY CHIEF Jordan Ramos PHOTOGRAPHY EDITOR Zach Dalzell IMAGE EDITOR Nick Martin PHOTOGRAPHERS Thomas Thoren DESIGNERS Michael Zhang MUSIC EDITOR Evan Lyman FOOD & DRINK EDITOR Jasmine Lee MOVIES & TV EDITOR Joyce Famakinwa ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT EDITOR Jessica Bourque COMMUNITY EDITOR Thomas Thoren CU CALENDAR D.J. Dennis COPY EDITORS Karl Schroeder DISTRIBUTION Brandi and Steve Wills STUDENT SALES MANAGER Molly Lannon CLASSIFIED SALES MANAGER Deb Sosnowski AD DIRECTOR Travis Truitt PUBLISHER Lilyan J. Levant

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Jessica Bourque JESSICA BOURQUE YIKES Arts & Entertainment Arts &Editor Entertainment Editor Yikes

» Sack lunches and their nos-

» Mark Zuckerberg: What hap-

talgia factor: My sister has started working as a school nurse’s assistant at an elementary school in our hometown. This means she wears the requisite oversized nurse’s jacket, the one that has kittens splayed all over it, and she constantly has to calm down crying children (She enjoys it while I am astounded at the levels of patience and zen she must have to work with kindergarteners through fifth graders three or four times a week.) This also means that now she’s back on the school schedule — getting to school by 8 a.m. and staying there until 3 p.m. — and she needs to pack a sack lunch, or, either my mom or I pack one for her and drop it off. It may be because of my cynical take-care-ofmyself apartment-dwelling lifestyle I am currently experiencing, but those sack lunches are wrought with nostalgia, memories of high school during which my mom would pack me and my sister some truly excellent lunches. I may have moaned and groaned about my inability to buy those chicken nuggets or that deli sandwich, but now looking back, I was actually really freaking lucky. And now, I get to act all maternal and pack my sister little-less-thanordinary sack lunches. It’s very ego boosting, I assure you.

pens when Facebook can’t sustain itself any longer? How will Zuckerberg keep the company afloat? By selling our personal information, that’s how! He can sell it to advertisers (he already is, actually), future employers, universities, parents, friends, pets, ANYONE! He owns it and can do WHATEVER he wants with it! Just think, employers will determine what kind of worker you will be based on the lifestyle you portray on Facebook! We’re doomed! We’re all doomed! ZUCKERBERG IS GOD!

Jordan Ramos Copy Chief Likes

LIKES

JORDAN RAMOS

Copy Chief

» Ferris Bueller: You know how every person has a soulmate? I am confident on a myriad of levels that Ferris Bueller is mine. If that makes me a weirdo, then so be it, because his passion for life, dry sense of humor, dancing skills and loyalty to loved ones have me falling in love all over again after each watch. He sings The Beatles. He lives near Chicago. HE IS A CHICAGO CUBS FAN. That’s the factor that puts him at the very top of my list. Above all of his good qualities, he’s a Cubs fan. Excuse me while I swoon.

» The sound of the letter “L”: I’ve mentioned my love for the sound of the letter “L” in a past Yikes, but I want to talk more about it. Words that contain an L are just generally prettier sounding words! Superfluous is my favorite word specifically because of how it sounds. Ella is my favorite girl name. Nolan is my favorite boy name. I don’t have an L in either my first or last name, which makes me sad inside. My sister, Mallory, is the worst — she gets two! Double the pretty sounds! (Note: A hard G is the ugliest sounding letter. See: grave, ugly, guilt. gastric. These words sound ugly.)

» Defriending: Sometimes, when I wake up, I have fewer Facebook friends than I did the night before. What did I do wrong? A Facebook friendship takes zero effort to maintain (a few “likes” here, a “Happy Birthday!” there) so I must have really offended you for you to terminate our effortless e-friendship. Was it my statuses? Probably not! I haven’t posted one in months! Maybe it was my pictures? Can’t be! I’ve only posted one album in my entire life! It doesn’t add up! I’M TOTALLY LIKEABLE! No, this is a conspiracy! The work of Mark Zuckerberg! He takes away my friends to heighten my social insecurities so that I then seek social acceptance from Facebook! He is an evil mastermind! ZUCKERBERG IS GOD!

» Instagrams: Instagrams? More like pentagrams! And who owns instagram? ZUCKERBERG! Satanists use pentagrams in rituals to honor their lord and savior: Satan! Likewise, Facebook users use Instagram to honor their lord and savior, ZUCKERBERG! Don’t you see?! ZUCERBERG IS GOD! Evan Lyman Music Editor Like

EVAN LYMAN

Music Editor

» Lil Bub: Buzz music writer Maddie Rehayem recently introduced me to the only cat in the world that matters. Her name is Lil Bub. Now, I consider myself a dog person. I didn’t understand the appeal of cats until I saw Bub. For the uninitiated, Lil Bub is a “perma-kitten,” the runt of the litter of a stray cat who was rescued by her owner despite being born with dwarfism, stubby legs and no teeth. Somehow, all of these “happy accidents” led to her looking like the most preciously cartoonish cat in the universe. Not only is she tiny, but she has giant green eyes and her lack of teeth and malformed jaw cause her tongue to permanently rest on the outside of her mouth. She also makes a ridiculous “squonking” sound when she’s petted. To top it all off, her owner insists that she can read minds, which isn’t out of the realm of possibility. Check her out on Facebook, Tumblr, Youtube, etc. She’s a tech savvy cat. January 10-16, 2013 buzz 3

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4 buzz January 10-16, 2013

Used with permission from Creative Commons and bbaltimore.

his year, two fantastically hilarious and just all-around awesome ladies will host the 70th annual Golden Globes: Saturday Night Live veterans Amy Poehler and Tina Fey. This marks the first time, ever, that two women host the event. But as they’ve already made BUZZhistory by becoming the first two women co-anchors of SNL’s "Weekend Update," THURSDAY this award show should JANUARY 10be a piece of cake for them. corp note...keep this same know size always All you buzz readers probably me best as the Food & Drink Editor, with a brief stint as Baby Daddy X 5.417 recapper1this past summer (Yes, yes, I recapped three episodes, should go read them online, 1/8th you page they’re pretty amazing, and then promptly lost the resources to watch the show the day it aired, and BUZZ ADglorious 12/27saga ORas1/3 that wasNO the end of my TV recapper.) However, as all my friends very much know, I live for the small screen (And the big screen, but thanks to Netflix and my newly acquired DVR, I declare the medium of television as the finest thing to exist on the planet.) My first introduction to the ladies went something like this: I saw numerous trailers for Baby Mama, went, “Huh, that looks funny, Bechdel Test-approved lady power,” and then promptly forgot about their and the movie’s existence until maybe two years ago. Then I saw Date Night and was immediately charmed by Tina Fey’s every move. Soon after that, my friend invited me over for a Netflix marathon of Parks and Recreation, starting with “Practice Date,” and before I knew it, I fell in love with Amy Poehler. I immediately went on a Googling and IMDBing binge and squealed in delight when I found out the two ladies were close friends. Like their forbearers, the ladies have slowly uploaded the interwebs with their Golden Globes promotional videos, showing off their best impressions of the award itself, their finishing-each-other’ssentences-kind-of-best-friends perfection and the goofy, smart aleck trademark they are both known for. Poehler already has experience of stealing the

spotlight at award shows, as evidenced by the acceptance speech mixup gag she and Julia LouisDreyfus did at last year’s Emmys. And if you Google search “why Tina Fey,” the first suggestion finishes the prompt with “is awesome.” But aside from their brilliant ability to be smart, sassy and adorable, both women are amazing human beings. Before her SNL days, Fey performed with The Second City. In 1997, she was soon hired as a writer for SNL, and despite initially struggling, became the show’s first female head writer two years later. In 2004, she showed off her writing and acting chops in the cult classic Mean Girls, forever changing the popular culture scene. In 2006, Fey left SNL to work on 30 Rock, a sitcom vaguely based on her experiences on the former. Then, in 2008, she made viral history by impersonating politician Sarah Palin in an SNL sketch. Her autobiography, Bossypants, is possibly one of the only books apart from the Harry Potter heptalogy that I inhaled within a day. Poehler has been constantly working since her improv days back in 1996, quickly becoming a full cast member on SNL in 2002, then co-anchor of "Weekend Update" from 2004 to 2008, as well as finding time to work on a barrage of movies, as well as squeezing a baby out in 2008, and then joining the cast of Parks and Recreation in 2009, further endearing herself to the American masses. This past July, her co-produced Youtube series “Smart Girls at the Party” debuted, a series that emphasizes authenticity, empowerment and individuality in young women. Buzzfeed even posted a “30 Lessons We Learned from Amy Poehler in 2012,” highlighting all the reasons why Poehler basically wins at life. What does it mean that we have two women hosting an awards show? Specifically, two women who are in their early 40s, who have no problem being irreverent and who regularly poke fun at the idealistic paragon of femininity that society has a hard time letting go? Even the promotional materials have

picked up on those aspects; one photo has them posed in glittery, curve-hugging golden gowns, their feet adorned with brightly colored Converse hightops sneakers. In one video, they promise to host the shows in their pajamas, to properly and comfortably partake in the festivities. Fey and Poehler aren’t ones to totter around in skintight, revealing outfits – unless it is to spoof the reality show Jersey Shore – and they don’t need a man to define themselves. In fact, even though they are both married (Fey to television producer Jeff Richmond, Poehler formerly to comedian Will Arnett), you never see them cutting themselves or their accomplishments down to size should they overshadow their spouses professionally. They actually do pass the Bechdel Test, a way of evaluating films’ female characters, in that a movie only passes it if at least two named women talk to each other about something besides a man. Granted, Poehler and Fey are real people in real life, but they are actresses and our main source of contact with them is through the silver screen, whether or not that screen is scripted. These two ladies are a breath of fresh air in today’s entertainment, who make their presence known through their intelligence and charisma, rather than through aggressive sexuality and feminine wiles. Their successes in front of and behind the camera make possible for other actresses, comediennes and writers to do the same, to be able to take on roles other than “quirky and endearing ditz,” “sexy side character,” “sarcastic and single funny girl,” or “bored housewife.” Think of the likes of Mindy Kaling and Eliza Coupe. We lady entertainment watchers finally have awesome role models who we don’t have to qualify as guilty pleasures. Recently, there have been visible progressive strides for female characters both on television and film; The Avengers’ Black Widow was a smartly written heroine who, while wearing a skintight black cat suit, used assumptions about her appearance to kick ass and managed to be the only character in the movie to not succumb to emotion or manipulation. Connie Britton is still as confident and appealing in Nashville, despite the show’s cringe-worthy premise of two women who hate each other and love the same man. The Mindy Project’s titular protagonist is an urban professional who is the anti-Bridget Jones, whose anxious desire for a plus one doesn’t mean she fails at life. Elementary proves that a man and a woman can just be friends, that a female Dr. Watson is even more nuanced and necessary than the traditional male Watson, and that the genius, overbearing, self-assured character of Sherlock Holmes can still exist even if he has had experience with submission. Dame Judi Dench’s M in the Daniel Craig James Bond reboot is an impossibly strong character who can go toe-to-toe with her male superiors, doesn’t flinch at the thought of imminent death and who is crafty and just as skilled in combat as her agents. Combine all those instances with Fey and Poehler’s hosting gig, and you’ve got a very optimistic new year in film for women, and I am gleeful with excitement.

Arts & Entertainment

GRaphic novels to get into

A list of must-reads for anyone looking to read graphic literature by Jessica Bourque Fun Home: Aptly labled a “tragicomic” by creator Alison Bechdel, Fun Home is one of the most heartbreaking yet touching graphic novels ever written (Disclaimer: It’s also one of my personal favorites, so this will get very gushy.) The novel explores Bechdel’s troubled relationship with her father, his struggle with his sexuality and his eventual suicide. Their complicated father-daughter relationship is paralleled by Bechdel’s own story of coming out and self-discovery. Fun Home is told in a non-linear fashion with Bechdel telling and retelling various anecdotes in a somewhat chaotic order; Bechdel herself called it a “labyrinth.” But this complex narrative structure makes Bechdel’s story all the more fascinating (it never feels confusing) and entertaining to read. Fun Home is both popular (It was a New York Times best seller!) and critically acclaimed (It won the coveted Eisner Award, among others!)

Journalism!

Clockwise from top left: Habibi, Maus, Fun Home, Persepolis. Used with Permission from the Creative Commons.

the words “comic book” still conjure images of hulking heroes and masked villains, then you aren’t reading enough comics. Graphic novels are serious literature. Don’t think so? You are sorely mistaken and seriously missing out (Some of the most critically acclaimed books of the last 50 years have been graphic novels!) Yes, they have pictures, but they also have ingenious narrative structures and praiseworthy prose. They communicate stories in a way no text novel can, and now many schools and universities are even incorporating graphic literature into class curriculums. For anyone still doubting the power and legitimacy of a graphic novel, I’ve compiled a list of “must-reads” that will surely change your mind. This list is obviously not comprehensive but is a mixture of my personal favorites and some critical successes.

Memoir!

Persepolis I & II: Americans have a skewed perception of the Middle East, especially Iran. Persepolis may not un-skew that perception, but it will undoubtedly provide the reader with a better appreciation of Persia (Fun fact: that’s Iran!) Author Marjane Satrapi’s cleverly weaves in Persian history with her own tale of coming of age during the Islamic revolution. Throughout the novel she makes a point to challenge Western misconceptions about Islam, Iran and Middle Eastern culture in a subtle yet powerful way. She opens the book as a 10-year-old living in Iran and takes us through her teen years in France, her eventual homelessness, her failed marriage, her suicide attempt and much more. The book became so popular and well-received that it was turned into an award-winning animated film.

Footnotes in Gaza: Joe Sacco is a pioneer of comic journalism and Footnotes is perhaps Sacco’s greatest work (Although his previous novel Palestine is also quite good!) Sacco has a degree in journalism and uses his reporting skills to write journalistic comics (He is published in major publications such as The Guardian and Harper’s Magazine) that are as accurate as any traditional text story. In Footnotes, Sacco investigates two separate mass killings of Palestinians by Israeli forces during the Suez War. Historical documents and extensive interviews are the backbone of this gripping novel, but it is Sacco’s artistic renderings that bring this investigation to life. A.D.: New Orleans After the Deluge: Josh Neufield draws from his own experiences as a Red Cross volunteer after Hurricane Katrina and his extensive interviewing of New Orleans residents to create this New York Times best seller and Eisner Award nominee. The novel follows six main characters (who are real people Neufield interviewed) in the hours before the hurricane hit and the days of destruction that followed. Neufield shows the horror of Hurrican Katrina through a very personal lense by following these six people throughout the novel. The novel was first published as a series of web comics but became so popular that it was compiled into a novel. If you are looking for a wonderfully vivid account of this national tragedy, look no further.

History!

The Beats: A Graphic History: Comic book legend Harvey Pekar is behind this celebratory novel that delves into Beatnik subculture. I say “celebratory” because this graphic retelling only adds to the legend of Beat culture created by icons like William S. Burroughs, Jack Kerouac and Allen Ginsberg. The novel is historically accurate but reads much like a tribute to this wild generation, by capturing and describing every manifestation of Beat culture. The reader sees the intimate re-

lationships between famous Beat authors and is introduced to famous Beat hangouts like San Francisco’s City Lights bookstore. While The Beats doesn’t dissect any great works of Beat literature, it leaves the reader with an appreciation and awe for the Beat culture and sparks a desire to read some Burroughs and Ginsberg novels. Maus: You can’t make a list about influential, enlightening graphic novels without including Maus. As the first graphic novel ever to win the Pulitzer Prize in 1992, Maus is often hailed as the greatest graphic novel of all time. The book, written by American cartoonist Art Spiegelman, depicts Spiegelman’s interviews with his father Vladek, a Polish Jew and Holocaust survivor. Maus is one part memoir in that it reveals, in intimate detail, Spiegelman’s troubled relationship with his father and his difficulty coping with his mother’s suicide, and another part historical non-fiction in its retelling of his parent’s tragic Holocaust survival story. Maus is both applauded and criticized for the way Spiegelman plays with racial constructions in the novel by depicting Jews as mice, Germans as cats and Polish non-Jews as pigs. However controversial it may be, Maus is still considered a masterpiece by most literary scholars and critics, and is now valuable course material for several fields.

Religion!

Buddha: This lighthearted novel written by manga-master Osamu Tezuka tells the story of Siddhartha (AKA Gautama Buddha, AKA Buddha) with some creative liberty. No, Buddha is not historically accurate and many of the characters are included simply to add entertainment. However, Tezuka’s depiction of Siddhartha and the teachings of Buddhism stay true to Buddhist traditions and history. Tezuka uses the fascinating of Siddhartha as the focal point of the novel beginning before Siddhartha was born until he dies and achieves enlightenment. Buddha is an eightvolume series but reads quickly as it is written at a high-school reading level (You can read two books in one sitting!) The novels is laced with Tezuka’s quirky sense of humor and the tone never feels serious, but anyone who reads the novel will walk away with a basic understanding of Buddhism. Habibi: This Islamic fairytale includes some of the most beautiful art you may ever see. Craig Thompson, author of the uber-successful and amazing Blankets, spent seven years drawing Habibi. The result is some amazingly intricate art that leaves the reader studying at the pages in awe. Thompson’s narrative is just as incredible as his art. Habibi is a fictional story about two runaway slaves living in what Thompson calls an “Orientalist landscape.” The book explores several themes, but the most compelling (in my opinion) is the way Thompson shows the commonalities between Islam and Christianity. Thompson juxtaposes passages from the Quran and the Bible and spends pages delving into the historical background of each. January 10-16, 2013 buzz 5

food & drink

It’s Time for Feasting

Academy Award nominees’ favorite foods by Shalayne Pulia and Jasmine Lee Favorite Food: Whitman’s Giant 40-ounce Sampler Leave it to Kmart to market 40-ounces of chocolate. But, in this case, Anne Hathaway’s character Fantine could certainly use a giant box of chocolate. Though, this particular “box-ochocolat” would not have been around for Fantine, a similar gift of sweet treats would have been much appreciated after the kind of heartache she experienced. Les Miserables tells the musical tale of Fantine and her illegitimate daughter, Cosette, among other characters in an intricate tale of deception, unrequited love, heartache and strength of the human spirit. I will not ruin the story line for you, but after her necessary turn to prostitution and a life literally down in the dumps, Fantine would certainly enjoy a giant carton of various chocolate delights – a female staple after experiences of heart-related woes.

Rust and Bone Used with permission from Creative Commons and eveos.

anuary is the month for award shows! Movies, television shows, actors and singers are all put under the microscopic eyes of critics, the masses and golden statues as they battle out who exactly will win this year’s “best of” awards. It is expected for the entertainment side of magazines to discuss contenders and the winners and losers, but in an irreverent take on the list of nominees, buzz Food & Drink has gathered a handful of them, picked and chose random filmic protagonists and posited their potential favorite foods below. So dress up fancy, turn on your television, keep these pages of buzz open on your lap and enjoy the upcoming week of American award shows.

MOVIES

Technically, the Oscar nominations haven’t been decided, but the Golden Globe nominees were named on Dec. 13 and there has been a significant amount of buzz surrounding Oscar predictions, so read on.

Brave Projected Nomination: Best Animated Film Character: Princess Merida Favorite Food: Anything but bewitched miniature cakes. Brave is the animated Disney Pixar film that warmed the hearts of mothers everywhere. A notso-traditional tale about teen angst and that tested relationship between a mother’s expectations and a daughter’s dreams. Princess Merida and Queen Elinor eventually mend their relationship, but not before a bewitched cake curses the queen into a black bear. As a result, I’d say Princess Merida’s favorite food would consist of any other sweet treat she could find and share with her loving family, especially treats that she and her triplet brothers could easily smuggle away in their sleeves.

6 buzz January 10-16, 2013

Argo Projected Nominations: Best Adapted Screenplay (Chris Terrio), Best Supporting Actor (Alan Arkin), Best Director (Ben Affleck), Best Picture Character: Tony Mendez Favorite Food: Mystery chocolate cupcakes with a chocolate chip cookie baked into the center. This film is based off the true story of the Canadian Caper that happened during the 1979-1980 Iranian hostage crisis. Well first of all, after all that stress, Mendez would certainly enjoy one heck of a cupcake indulgence (perhaps among various other hard liquors). An unsuspecting chocolate cupcake would remind Mendez of his cover as a Hollywood producer for the fake Sci-fi film Argo. On the outside, this treat seems as normal as any other chocolate cupcake (or Hollywood producer). Little do onlookers (or the Iranian militants) know, the cupcake is not a cupcake at all, but a glorified chocolate chip cookie. With the dessert’s true identity kept a secret until the last bite, Mendez is reminded of his true identity and covert mission.

Les Miserables Projected Nominations: Best Adapted Screenplay (William Nicholson), Best Supporting Actress (Anne Hathaway), Best Actor (Hugh Jackman), Best Picture Character: Jean Valjean Favorite Food: NOT BREAD. Not much explanation needed here. After 19 years in prison for stealing bread under a tyrant police officer, Inspector Javert, followed by decades of hiding from said inspector, it’s safe to say this character would indulge in anything but bread – which unfortunately, would be a wee difficult in the land of croissants and baguettes. Character: Fantine

Projected Nominations: Best Supporting Actress (Marion Cotillard) Character: Stéphanie Favorite Food: A Petite Steak Filet My recent Marion Cotillard obsession after noticing her as my favorite character in Midnight in Paris continues with this French-Belgian film. Her American film calling card features a more effortlessly sexy yet beautiful, old Hollywood extravagant yet simple gown wearing, twisted yet alluring character as seen in The Dark Knight Rises and Inception. This foreign film however, features a raw side of Cotillard as a killer whale trainer who loses both her legs in a terrible accident. She still manages to find love however, in Ali, a young, single father desperate for work. While Stéphanie’s world is based on marine life, in light of her accident and ever-feminine air of Cotillard, I presume this character would prefer the “turf” side of surf and turf.

Zero Dark Thirty Projected Nominations: Best Original Screenplay (Mark Boal), Best Supporting Actress (Jessica Chastain), Best Director (Kathryn Bigelow), Best Picture Character: Maya Favorite Food: All-American cheeseburger and fries This controversial retelling of the decade-long manhunt for Osama bin Laden features character Maya as the persistent CIA operative who spent many years tracking down the al-Qaeda terrorist. This emotional action/drama film tugs at the heartstrings of every American filled with anger toward this mastermind terrorist and a sense of pride for Country and the six Navy S.E.A.Ls who brought him down. This is why I believe character Maya would gladly indulge in an all-American feast of barbecued hamburgers and fries, with perhaps a little pie on the side as well.

Lincoln Projected Nominations: Best Adapted Screenplay (Tony Kushner, John Logan and Paul Webb), Best Supporting Actress (Sally Field), Best Supporting Actor (Tommy Lee Jones), Best Actor (Daniel Day-Lewis), Best Director (Steven Spielberg), Best Picture Character: Abraham Lincoln Favorite Food: Something spicy As most Americans know, and all who watch this film will be reminded of, Lincoln had a lot on his figurative plate while he was president. Fighting for the emancipation of the slaves became his most notable achievement as president. The trials and tribulation of that fight are evident in this film that chronicles Lincoln’s final four months of life. Arguably too preoccupied to be concerned with the food he ate, Lincoln may have benefited from some spicy cuisine. Perhaps food with a little kick could have helped the character take that ever-needed moment to enjoy his food. If we can all “chew it over with Twix,” doesn’t the former President who is responsible for the Emancipation Proclamation deserve a little break from reality as well?

Django Unchained Projected Nominations: Best Original Screenplay (Quentin Tarantino), Best Supporting Actor (Leonardo DiCaprio), Best Picture Character: Calvin Candie Favorite Food: Fine southern sweet confectionary indulgences (all the more to aid those rotting teeth) “I think he really represented the moral decay at the time. It was only fitting that…he was rotting from the inside,” said DiCaprio to the New York Post on December 16, when asked about his role as vicious Calvin Candie. Candie is the cold-hearted villain in this old west, slave riddled backdrop for Quentin Tarantino’s Django Unchained. He is a plantation owner who ruthlessly forces his male slaves to learn to fight and his female slaves into prostitution. As DiCaprio says, the character is a personification of the moral absence of the time, further exemplified by his rotting teeth. Only fitting then, would it be to have Candie’s favorite food be as extravagant and tooth-rot inducing as possible. A truly revolting character deserves such sweet demise.

TELEVISION The New Normal Nominated for: Favorite New TV Comedy Character: David Murray Favorite food: Pan seared, herb roasted salmon The New Normal is Ryan Murphy’s answer to Modern Family, in which two gay men find a single mother to become their surrogate, and a new kind of family and reality sets in once these three characters lives become entangled. While at times the characters and weekly situations seem a bit

community formulaic, the show is at its best when it focuses on the slow development of the David-BryanGoldie-Shania relationship. David is quite fit, with a healthy love of eating green and organic produce, a love that he more than occasionally tries to enforce upon the wildly eccentric Goldie and Shania duo. His mother is a French trained chef and even his estranged father knows how to make a fancy salad. He celebrates finding the perfect bulbous carrot at the local farmers’ market, involuntarily reaches for Skinnygirl wine, and debates at length over which pressed juice to purchase from the gym; so appropriately, his favorite food would be something artfully presented, healthy, steamed, low in calories and high in taste, and a dish that calls for a glass of fruity red wine. Character: Bryan Collins Favorite food: Dessert and the occasional fast food hamburger A consistent throwaway joke of Andrew Rannells' Bryan character is his love for sweets and desserts, a love that he usually keeps on the backburner because of his vanity and workout regimen, until disaster strikes, stress settles in, and the only way he can cope in a patronizingmother-in-law or a everything-managed-hasgone-to-pieces or a rearing-against-a-repulsive-

conservative-Jane-Forrest situation is for him to eat ALL THE JUNK FOOD in his vicinity.

Elementary Nominated for: Favorite New TV Drama Character: Joan Watson Favorite food: fruit smoothie CBS debuted Elementary this past September, a New York, gender-swapped take on the much loved Sherlock Holmes canon. Jonny Lee Miller plays the post-rehab center addict recovering Sherlock whose pressing need to figure out the inconsistencies in life causes him to overstep the bounds of social niceties. The fabulous Lucy Liu plays Joan Watson, an ex-surgeon who now moonlights as a sober companion for recovering addicts, reluctantly pulled into Sherlock’s consulting activities. While we don’t get a lot of insight into Sherlock, Joan soon falls into a familiar schedule, and every episode makes sure to pan over the woman as she methodically makes her morning, post-run fruit smoothie. In goes strawberries, yogurt, juice and protein powder into Joan’s high-powered blender, while Sherlock either opts for a cup of tea or nothing at all for breakfast. This quick scene allows for a bit of introspection and convenient character

study: The put-together, deliberately professional Joan is just as disarming and unexpected as an enhanced pink drink, as opposed to the helter-skelter, twitchy Sherlock who regards routine as unnecessary and dull.

The Big Bang Theory Nominated for: Favorite Network TV Comedy Character: Sheldon Cooper, PhD Favorite food: Big Boy hamburgers and Chinese food The Big Bang Theory is on its sixth season now, and the show’s characters have been, for the most part, completely fleshed out, from their wardrobe preferences to their past dating history. Sheldon Cooper is my favorite character, and as specific and long-winded his official doctoral name is (Dr. Sheldon Lee Cooper, B.S., M.S., M.A., Ph.D., Sc.D), so are his favorite foods. For example, on Mondays he eats Mee Krob with extra peanuts; on Tuesdays he eats the barbecue bacon cheeseburger from the Cheesecake Factory; on Thursdays he has Giacomo’s sausage, mushroom and olive pizza; and on Fridays, he orders the Szechuan Chicken with diced chicken and low sodium soy sauce. He even learned Mandarin specifically so that he could ensure the best possible din-

ing experience at the local Chinese restaurant. However, his absolute favorite food is the Big Boy burger from the titular restaurant.

Supernatural Nominated for: Favorite Sci-Fi/Fantasy TV Show Character: Dean Winchester Favorite food: Sandwiches and pie Tumblr has this whole Dean Winchester meme about his love for food – there’s an entire tumblr blog titled “Dean Winchester Eating Things.” My only knowledge about the show is through that, actually, so imagine my surprise when I realized that it’s actually a show about two brothers fighting evil, supernatural beings to protect their world from demons. However, apparently among all this hunting and killing business, Dean has time to gorge on his food favorites, and bemoan whenever his brother brings him cake instead of the much better pie. There was even an entire episode about sandwiches : “How to Win Friends and Influence Monsters,” season seven, episode eight, in which demons schemed to take over the world via cursed sandwiches, and the audience got the delightful scene in which Dean nearly cried at the sight of his gurgling turkducken sandwich.

2013 Predictions

What’s to come in the new year by Community staff Chia Pets become Chia juices: Remember Chia Pets? The terracotta animal figurines everyone sprouted green chia plants on in the ‘80s? Well, chia seeds are going to make a comeback in 2013. According to a recent New York Times article, chia seeds are a great source of nutrition, as they are rich in omega-3 fatty acids, antioxidants, protein and fiber. With a history of use dating all the way back to the Aztecs, the tasteless seeds are versatile and can be incorporated into a multitude of foods including breads, dairy products and beverages. The chia seed is already becoming known as more than just a novelty item. Companies like Mamma Chia are starting to gain popularity for including chia seeds in its organic fruit juices. This year, I predict even more people will join in on the health trend causing companies to ditch the high-fructose corn syrup and embrace the chia! —Maggie Su Apple’s takeover: Due to my immense dislike of odd numbers, I don’t really like the sound of “two thousand and thirteen.” Snowballing off of that, I am almost entirely sure I’ll be writing “2012” on my papers, medical forms and exams for the next three months. However, 2013 is going to bring great changes, I can just feel it in the air. New Year’s resolutions will finally be fulfilled, promises kept and goals met … Truly though, this year is going to be the year, right? The Mayans said it was the end, but in contrast it is a new beginning. I predict Apple is going to take over the world. There will be Apple lawnmowers, Apple landlines, Apple cars, Apple ovens, microwaves and any other thing

you own now that doesn’t include that deliciouslooking miniature white apple logo. The iPhone 6 is going to blow the iPhone 5 out of the water. We thought Siri was top notch surfing the web for us, getting us to where we need to go and entertaining us with her bizarre feedback. The iPhone 6, however, will feature its own personal butler with applications like shaving, cleaning your house and even brushing your teeth for you. Think, with this Apple takeover, we won’t have to do much of anything this year. —Sarah Kidwell Celebrity drama Since couple Kanye West and Kim Kardashian announced during the final days of 2012 that they are excited to welcome a baby into the world, I believe the new year will include a new level in the couple’s relationship. Even though Kim K. has yet to finalize the divorce from her short-lived marriage to Kris Humphries, she may become engaged to Kanye West. For their child’s sake, we can only hope this time it is authentic. Another noteworthy celeb prediction is for the famous eye candy, Liam Hemsworth, to finally come to his senses and break it off with his notso-fortunate looking fiancee, Miley Cyrus. Rumors circulated over the holidays that the two secretly tied the knot, but for now the ill-fated news has yet to be confirmed. If they end up getting married instead of breaking it off, as I predict, I only hope for Hemsworth’s sanity that Cyrus invests in some quality hair extensions. —Victoria Wiggins

Used with permission from Creative Commons and Jeffery Beall.

In your mind 2013 will be an important year for technology. Software engineers will develop a way for cell phones to be completely hands-free and voicefree. That’s right, you’ll be able to communicate by thought. Just think it and your phone will do it! Have to send a text while you’re in class or driving? No problem, just think your message and your phone will send it. No extra psychic powers required. Additionally, the technology used to create Google’s self-driving cars will be expanded to consumer markets. For a pretty penny, you will

be able to get around in style in your very own self-driving car. As for campustown, I predict the Alma Mater will not return until June and the graduates will riot in protest of their lost photo opportunities. In the fall, to the dismay of underage students, many popular campus bars will only allow patrons 21 years of age and older to enter. This will disrupt campus traditions such as Unofficial St. Patrick’s Day and football “block,” but campus police will be able to focus on patrolling and crime will greatly decrease. —Monica Detter January 10-16, 2013 buzz 7

music

Regional Bias Best of 2012 by buzz Music staff

his year was an interesting one for local releases. While full albums were a rare treat, many local artists moved toward singles and EPs, sacrificing grandiose artistic statements for quick and compact morsels of music. While we couldn’t get to it all, we at buzz made a big step in covering the local scene more closely, and we’d like to continue doing so in the future. So don’t be a stranger! Any CU band/artist who expects to release something in the coming year, send a heads up to music@readbuzz.com and we will do our best to review your stuff in an installment of our Regional Bias column. We don’t bite ... Hard. In the meantime, here’s a quick recap of some of our favorites from 2012:

The Divide, Self-titled EP Mumford & Sons put out an album last year. It was as complacently average and intently mediocre as their sore little English hearts could manage, yet people still seemed excited by it. I don’t mean to judge others’ tastes, but why settle for processed fodder like Marcus Mumford when an authentic Americana band lurks in our own backyard? While Babel relied on the oozing cheese of its unnecessarily large vocabulary of human body parts to affect raw emotion, local folk four-piece The Divide are simply honest boys telling it like it is rather than streamlining your music consumption. But as if the superiority of singer Ben Montalbano’s intimate storytelling isn’t persuasive enough, last year’s self-titled effort from The Divide features much of the same instrumentation as Mumford & Sons, only more precisely executed for emotional crescendo, such as the anxiously paced banjo of “If I,” the flirtatious swing of “Windows,” or the simultaneous nostalgia and optimism evoked by “When the Spring Comes.” To really feel the authority The Divide commands over the folk and Americana genres though, listen to stand-out track “Colorado.” Montalbano’s steady croon, kept company by a solemnly faithful electric guitar line, soars through a bitter, angry, yet self-conscious deposition of failed romance. The Divide offers an authentic Americana experience of Midwestern lust, love and loss with the catchy hooks to keep you humming the friendly bass melody of “County Line” long after the shallow, superficial Mumford comparisons die out. —Tyler Durgan

Horrible Things, Dumb Days Punk through and through, Horrible Things’ Dumb Days bleeds out with the laments of a post-relationship heartache. The nine-track album never releases the gas pedal, delivering a high-energy sound that entices and encapsulates you with every listen. The first eight tracks on Dumb Days follow the healing process after a devastating break up. Coming full circle on the eighth track, “Steps,” (which contains perhaps the catchiest vocal melodies on the album) the first seven songs are dominated by the clouded

8 buzz January 10-16, 2013

mind of an abandoned heart. The anger is immediate in “La Paressé” as lead singer Tim Reynolds screams out the line “You mother fucker, you stole her away from me,” and continues, although selffocused throughout the remainder of the album. Appropriately sprinkled with Peter Pan’s “I Won’t Grow Up,” the meticulous thought put into the writing of Dumb Days is apparent, as each song grows upon the last, completely presenting the evolution of emotional grievance. The premier track “$20” is merely one minute and six seconds long, but successfully stands out as one of Horrible Things’ best. It’s not surprising to find “I found on the ground, twenty bucks” echoing in your head for hours on end or for the line to be triggered by Andrew Jackson’s face upon that cloth, green canvas. “(I’m) Passive Aggressive” is no different. The sixth track’s opening line finds a way to infiltrate your ears and stay there. Perhaps the best ear infection available, Dumb Days is filled with catchy vocals, in-your-face music, and an emotionally relatable subject to draw your empathetic interest. Just as Reynolds admits, “It’ll happen again, but until then…” in terms of crawling back to love, there’s no way to escape Dumb Days after you get a taste. You’ll be back and you’ll be begging for more. —Sean Neumann

Santah, You’re Still A Lover EP While Santah recently relocated to Chicago, they will still always be a Champaign band in our eyes (or our hearts). Santah released You’re Still A Lover this year, a five-song EP full of lush guitars, interesting keyboard textures and large harmonies. The harmonies come courtesy of Vivian McConnell, sister of lead vocalist/guitar player/ songwriter Stan McConnell, now a full-fledged member of the band. The lyrics on You’re Still A Lover beautifully depict someone falling head-over-heels in love and all of the emotions that come with it. “Teeth” shows a man falling in love with a woman while still in a relationship with another woman, while also acknowledging the vulnerability that comes with new love: “Not at all kidding, it’s not at all cheating if I am giving it all to you/All my weaknesses, I can’t promise them, but you already knew/I’m a catch, I’m so deep/I’m a trap, I’ve got teeth/But you already knew.” The musical arrangements on You’re Still A Lover are great; keyboard arrangements weave in and out of the mix of standout track “Indigo,” creating a dreamy landscape that transcends traditional indie rock, and “Springfield” starts the EP with Santah’s best groove yet. Though it is a bit short at five songs, You’re Still A Lover is a welcome addition to Santah’s catalog, and easily one of the best CU releases of the year. Here’s to hoping a new full-length comes soon. —Dan Durley

Coed Pageant, The Seasons EPs Coed Pageant, the side project of Bradley and Gretchen Bergstrand of The Palace Flophouse,

released a substantial EP for each season of the year. Anyone who has lived in the Midwest would notice how these EPs showcase the duo’s ability to get at the essence of, musically and lyrically, each season. Ever so relatable now is the loneliness brought on by Midwestern winters, as both Bergstrands sing on “Be Here,” “They open up the wounds that you had sword had gone away.” They sing together for the most part, splitting into pleasant harmonies and back. Even the instrumental tracks on the spring, summer and fall EPs achieve seasonal perfection. Tastefully added horns and strings on other tracks do the same. —Maddie Rehayem

Withershins, Silver Cities Silver Cities, the sophomore LP from Withershins is heartfelt and twinkly, and perhaps more “buildy” than any other CU album, or album in general released in 2012. The full-bodied sound of this band is a symphony created with echoed-out guitar solos and precisely placed vocals, exemplified on the second and third tracks, “Glittered Out” and “Monkey.” Frontman Isaac Arms’ raw emotion on this album is tamed by some beautiful production (done by Aaron McCallister at Earth Analog). Each song is an exciting venture into the band’s shoegazy instrumentation and emotional lyricism. —Maddie Rehayem Editor’s Note: Perhaps the most interesting thing about this album is that it is a “CU rock” album to its core. As Arms remains one of the driving forces of the current scene, Silver Cities manages to speak about the highs and lows of being in a CU band while sounding very much like Hum and Braid, perhaps the greatest and most influential CU exports.

Kowabunga! Kid, Surf Witchery Halloween Cassingle After taking over 2011 with Easter’s heartfelt and near-perfect Demonstration, the boys and girls from Garfield’s Garden didn’t rest in 2012. Easter bassist Aaron Shults formed his lo-fi, Wavvesinspired side project Kowabunga! Kid and put out two short, but sweet, releases. While both were tons of fun, Surf Witchery saw the trio really come into form with some spooktacular Halloweenthemed garage-punk. If you didn’t get a chance to hear “Wolf Luv” and “Surf Witchery” back in October, give it a listen on their bandcamp. It still rocks no matter the time of year. —Evan Lyman

Honorable Mentions: The 92s, Void EP Kowabunga! Kid, Self Titled EP Witch In Her Tomb, Self Titled Megan Johns, Hey, Lonely Hank, The Venture EP Anna Karenina/Anna Karina, Autobiographies EP Sonny Stubble, Self-Titled Neoga Blacksmith, Some Pig

Top down: Dumb Days, You're Still A Lover, Surf Witchery and The Divide. Used with permission from Horrible Things, Santah, Kowabunga! Kid and The Divide, respectively.

movie review

django unchained

★★★✩✩ r

Used with permission from Columbia Pictures.

he first thing you need to know about Django Unchained is that it’s not Inglourious Basterds part 2; if you approach this film with those expectations you might leave unsatisfied. It is not Quentin Tarantino’s revenge fantasy answer to the American slave trade as a whole. Instead, this film focuses on one man’s journey. The year is 1858 and slaves whose feet are chained together are marching to be placed with their new owners, among them is Django (Jamie Foxx). He is beaten down, tired, cold and scarred from whippings. He never makes it to these new owners, however, and instead, Christoph Waltz’s Dr. King Schultz, who audiences may recognize as the cunning, bloodthirsty high ranking SS officer from Inglourious Basterds, steps in and buys Django. We quickly learn that Dr. Schultz is a former dentist turned bounty hunter who needs Django’s help identifying three slave driver brothers who have bounties on their heads. So while Dr. Schultz makes it

clear he is against slavery, he needs Django’s help and as Schultz says, it doesn’t hurt that he is in no position to say no. He agrees to grant Django his freedom, and a portion of the earnings, once their mission is complete. They continue to work together, Django now a free man, and the two men form a mentor/mentee relationship. Throughout these scenes, you see that Tarantino has made the Spaghetti Western he has always wanted to tackle as a director. After the winter, Dr. Schultz and Django come up with a plan to rescue Django’s wife, Broomhilda (Kerry Washington), from a Mississippi plantation known as Candyland. Django and Broomhilda were cruelly split up and sold separately, a common practice of the time. Tarantino never shies away from the visceral brutality of slavery, as we see the scars left from whippings, chains and shackles. There is a particularly gruesome scene featuring a slave named D’Artagnan. The film has its sources of humor, but none of them come from the violence of slavery.

by Joyce Famakinwa Jamie Foxx is an actor whose larger-than-life persona (during his talk show appearances he always seems like he is on the verge of bursting into a song and dance number), could be distracting, but in the past he has proven his ability to rein it in and disappear in the role. He does this here again, delivering a quiet performance where we see him evolve from a man who has experienced some of the worst torture that life has to offer to somewhat of a larger-than-life folk legend. Leonardo DiCaprio plays smarmy plantation owner Calvin Candie, and as soon as he is on screen he instantly repulses you. Pretentious, greedy and crass, he is evil incarnate. The film’s other villain, Steven (Tarantino alum, Samuel L. Jackson), Candie’s house slave, had the potential to be more complex, which he is despite the films reluctance to explore this. Steven embodies the effects of how racism manifests into self-hate and ultimate loyalty to one oppressor. Washington, who is arguably given the least to do out of all the main characters, makes the most of her screen time; a lesser actress would have been forgettable in this role. It is also worth noting that this is the first Tarantino script since Pulp Fiction that does not include a significant story arc featuring a female character. All the usual Tarantino’s signature moves are here: cooler-than-thou characters, Mexican standoff, distinct soundtrack, references to his favorite genres and a host of others that film fans will immediately pick up on. Overall, Django Unchained is a very ambitious film — what Tarantino film isn’t — but it could have used more time in the editing room.

Winter Activities by Sa rah Kidwell inter in central Illinois is often a bitter time. And with bone-chilling weather without fluffy snow, it makes for quite an unenjoyable season. However, we tend to have our classic go-to activities, such as shopping, seeing movies with friends and occasionally catching an all-day marathon of last year’s favorite television show followed by lots of junk food and good laughs. While those things are always available, Champaign-Urbana has much more to offer its cabin fever-struck citizens than a lazy day on the couch during the wintertime. The first one of these fun activities is getting a group of friends or family together for ice skating at the University’s Ice Arena. Located at 406 E. Armory Ave., the ice skating rink is an active way to spend a day this

winter. If you know young ones who don’t know how to skate, the ice arena also offers winter and spring ice skating classes. Ice skating is only one of many activities CU offers during the wintertime. On Jan. 17 at 2 p.m., there is an awesome opportunity to get more ethnically rounded during a tour of the Japan House, followed by a traditional Japanese tea ceremony, at 2000 S. Lincoln Ave. There will be a short introduction and tour of the Japan House, which is free. If you choose to participate in the tea ceremony, there is a small fee of only $8. Hot tea would be a delicious break from a cold winter day! Gather friends, loved ones and all Illini fans together on Jan. 17 to attend the men’s basketball game at Assembly Hall. They will play North-

WEEK AHEAD

Raging Bull

Opens Jan. 11, 10 p.m. The Art Theater, 126 W. Church St., Champaign $9/Adults, $7/Students When you think of dramatic onscreen physical transformations, think Robert De Niro in Raging Bull. The film focuses on the life of boxer Jake LaMotta. More than just a film about boxing, the Martin Scorsese classic is an intense character study. Here is your chance to see it on the big screen! —Joyce Famakinwa, Movies & TV Editor

Chase Baby and Chasin’ Treezz with I2K, Pion-G, Mo Astro, Woods G, and DJ EpilepC Friday, Jan. 11 at 9 p.m. The Canopy Club, 708 S. Goodwin Ave., Urbana

Here it is again! More hip-hop for dat ass. I gotta say I’m glad to see Canopy Club is booking these local hip-hop shows, with Chase Baby who’s been making his name in the area, as well as former UC Hip-Hop Congress president EpilepC and others. Can you kick it? Yes, you can, if you’re 18+. —Evan Lyman, Music Editor

Standup Comedy Open Mic

Things to do to make the cold season in CU more enjoyable

buzz’s

western, and the Illini truly deserve our support for doing well so far this season. Shortly after, on Jan. 21, there will also be an Illini women’s basketball game against Northwestern, also at Assembly Hall. This would be a great way to spend time with family and friends while supporting our local Big Ten university! Although these activities are fun, there is so much more CU offers during the wintertime than these select few activities. To see these and much more, visit http://www.visitchampaigncounty.org/calendar/ to see what is going on locally every month in Champaign-Urbana. While movie days are most definitely a must, don’t make it the only thing to do this winter. Happy New Year!

Thursday, Jan. 10 at 9 p.m. Clark Bar, 207 W. Clark Street, C. Free!

What better way to spend a Thursday night than listening to a bunch of drunk men tell you sad stories about their penises? That’s right! Comedy open mic! I’ll be there this week (Hopefully. I also might have to go to court because I accidentally ran over a woman and her, alleged, two kids — but I only saw one stroller, so I say there’s only one kid!) Anyway, enjoy the comedy stylings of the Tuttle Brothers who will definitely be there. Also probably Sinbad, popular BET and Def Jam Comic of the ‘90s will be there. Lots of Sinbad standup appearances in CU for his 2013 residency! —Nick Martin, Managing Editor

January 10-16, 2013 buzz 9

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10 buzz January 10-16, 2013

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440

Large, furnished room available January 1st in beautiful Victorian house, two blocks from campus, Urbana. Family-style, co-ed living with other graduate students. Includes many amenities and utilities. Individual six month lease with optional extension. $515/mo. Julie: 630-759-5932, http://www.studenthousingurbanail. com

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APARTMENTS

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CALL 217.390.9900 to setup a Tour 7 days/week

LIL BUB

Sledding Spots in CU

A guide to the best, and possibly only, four sledding opportunities in town

jone sin’

by Matt Jones

“The World Didn’t End”--but some other things happened in 2012.

by Thomas Thoren

The sled hill at Prairie Park. Photo by Thomas Thoren.

e live in a notoriously flat part of the country, but that doesn’t mean we can’t take part in the winter sledding tradition. After the snowfall on New Year’s Eve, I set out to examine four places to go sledding within Champaign-Urbana’s city limits. Sure there are other sites in the area that provide great sledding along with more beautiful scenery, such as Lake of the Woods in Mahomet or Allerton Park near Monticello, but the massive snowfalls that provide the best sledding conditions also create driving nightmares. You’ll want snow so badly that you are forced to walk in order to go sledding. Here are the four locations in order from wimpiest to gnarliest. If you need a sled, you can grab any number of makeshift sleighs such as a lunch tray, trash can lid or flattened cardboard box. For only $5, however, you can buy a durable saucer from any box store; it will provide a much better ride and will last for many winters to come. To start, I suggest heading to Crystal Lake Park in Urbana. There is a single gentle hill that stretches out to create plenty of space for multiple riders at a time, so you won’t have to worry about waiting in line for your next trip down. You won’t have to steer clear of any obstructions or colliding with trees unless you get a running start and really launch yourself toward the treeline. Just make sure you don’t sled on the sides leading down to the lake! You can look down at the ice all you want as you walk around the park; there is no need to see it from underneath as well. Next up is the triangular hill located between two baseball diamonds in Prairie Park, 1202 E. Washington St., Urbana. The three corners of the triangle form long, gentle hills while the three sides are much steeper, though shorter. The exposed top of the hill means the wind howls at you as you prepare for your next descent. There aren’t many trees to get in your way at this hill either, so

you’re free to sled without any worries. Now that you have some faster sledding under your belt, it is time to visit the hill between Orchard Downs and the Japan House in Urbana. It is taller and steeper than the previous two hills and includes many different paths to the bottom. The two main ways are the usual long, but still steep, hills that gradually get you going fast and sustains that speed until the end. Watch for the trees on the bottom of the east side of the hill, though! Try the south side for a perilous path among plants and trees, or the north side with a curving bank that will make you feel like you’re riding on a bobsled track. For CU’s take on Mount Everest, head to Centennial Park in Champaign where you will find a hill so big and intimidating that you have to take one of more than five walking paths in order to get to the summit. You know how some roller coasters make you swear they are steeper than vertical? Well this is nature’s equivalent to that. The hill has a wide expanse with multiple different paths to the bottom, so you won’t need to wait long for your next dance with gravity and fate. There are some paths that are relatively tame, others that drop you and accelerate you immediately, and other paths that appear to be molded over the winters in order to create a bumpy ride of ups and downs. A few freshly prepared snow jumps were dotted throughout the hillside and base as well for those souls who are either brave or unlucky enough to go airborne. You’ll feel comfortable gaining plenty of momentum as you plummet down the slope because there is nearly nothing to collide with until you have been sliding along flat ground for awhile. The snow has receded for now, but there is always another snow storm on its way. Get your sleds ready for when it comes!

Stumped? Find the solutions in the Classifieds pages.

Across 1 Did some hoof work 5 Acoustic guitarist’s lack 8 Reasons for some performance anxiety 13 “___ but known....” 14 Go head to head 15 Words intoned 16 With “The,” hit summer movie with Robert Downey, Jr. 18 Imply 19 “Rah!” 20 Nervous movement 22 Wayside taverns 23 Cruise ship that capsized off Italy’s coast in January 2012 26 Zeus’s sister (and lover) 27 Ctrl-S function 28 “Yuck!” 31 Devilish sort 33 Beth preceder 37 If it had happened, you wouldn’t be reading this 42 Org. with a shelter outreach program 43 Group of cubicles 44 Thesaurus wd. 45 It’s just a little bit 48 Paint hastily 51 Where Michael Phelps won even more medals 57 R&B’s india.___ 58 “This is ___ boring”

59 “OK, sir, I gotcha” 61 “___ Dearest” 63 Snacks snapped up after its manufacturer went bankrupt 65 Apply oil ritually 66 “Tickety ___” (animated Nick Jr. show) 67 Folk singer Burl 68 Last name in British automakers 69 “What a display!” 70 Jane’s Addiction album “Ritual ___ Habitual”

Down 1 Fuzzy carpet 2 Devastation 3 “___ Billie Joe” (Bobbie Gentry song) 4 Best-selling author D’Souza 5 Schubert song played at weddings 6 Salyut 7 successor 7 Green sauce 8 Drab crayon hue 9 100% 10 Get up 11 Singer/guitarist Lopez 12 Taco salad ingredient 15 Center of activity 17 Airport terminal area 21 The newly-elected 24 Rough it

25 Mirror shape 28 Thurman who killed Bill onscreen 29 Natural ___ (subject of “fracking” in 2012) 30 Prefix meaning “less than normal” 32 Go boom 34 Pre-album releases, for short 35 He unleashed “Gangnam Style” on YouTube in 2012 36 “Chicken Run” extra 38 Like the scholarly world 39 Org. once involved with Kosovo 40 “Agent ___ Banks” 41 He played the youngest son on “Eight Is Enough” 46 Very beginning 47 Dairy noise 49 Getting all ___ your face 50 What a toddler aspires to be 51 1996 presidential race dropout Alexander 52 University of Maine town 53 Leonard who wrote “I Am Not Spock” 54 Powerball, e.g. 55 Sour cream and ___ (dip flavor) 56 Girder material 60 ___ buco (veal dish) 62 Suffix for “opal” 64 Court

January 10-16, 2013 buzz 11

CALENDAR

JANUARY

2012(JAN10)3qUARTER(bUzz)

JANUARY 10-16, 2013 SUBMIT YOUR EVENT TO THE CALENDAR: Online: Click "SUBMIT YOUR EVENT" at the217.com • E-mail: send your notice to calendar@the217.com • Fax: 337-8328, addressed to the217 calendar Snail mail: send printed materials via U.S. Mail to: the217 calendar, Illini Media, 512 E. Green St., Champaign, IL 61820 • Call: 531-1456 if you have a question or to leave a message about your event.

KR ANNERT CENTER FOR THE PERFORMING ARTS

5pm Complete listing available at

THE217.COM/CALENDAR THURSDAY 10 Live music & karaoke Chillax with DJ Belly and Matt Harsh Radio Maria, 10pm

SA JAN 26

TH JAN 17

Krannert Uncorked with Eclectiq Soul, R&B // Marquee

Chancellor for Public Engagement

10am

SU JAN 27

Dance for People with Parkinson’s 3pm

// Marquee

7:30pm

Champaign-Urbana Symphony Orchestra: Musical Travels // Champaign-Urbana

SATURDAY 12

Krannert Uncorked

7:30pm

February Dance

7:30pm

Sing the Truth! Angelique Kidjo, Dianne Reeves, and Lizz Wright Continue the Legacies of Miriam Makeba, Abbey Lincoln, and Odetta // Marquee

7:30pm

Stefan Milenkovich, violin

About 9:30pm

Global Transfer Afterglow: Jeff Chan’s Cultural Arts Quartet

5pm

TU JAN 22

7pm

Food & festivals 7pm

Russian National Ballet Theatre: Don Quixote // Marquee

Russian National Ballet Theatre: Chopiniana/Romeo and Juliet // Marquee

// School of Music

THESE SPONSORS MAKE GOOD STUFF HAPPEN:

Sing the Truth! Angelique Kidjo, Dianne Reeves, and Lizz Wright Continue the Legacies of Miriam Makeba, Abbey Lincoln, and Odetta Dianna Armstrong Anonymous Global Transfer Afterglow: Jeff Chan’s Cultural Arts Quartet

5pm 7pm

Krannert Uncorked

// Marquee

Russian National Ballet Theatre: Swan Lake // Marquee

7:30pm

Russian National Ballet Theatre Craig Sutter

TH JAN 24

Live music & karaoke

TUESDAY 15

// Dance at Illinois

WE JAN 23

MONDAY 14 BOOM-JAM Open Stage Boomerang’s Bar and Grill, 8pm Lounge Night Radio Maria, 10pm Hootenanny Rosebowl Tavern, 8pm Abe Froman Project Mike N’ Molly’s, 8:30pm

MLK Commemoration: A Service of Celebration Event // Office of the Vice Chancellor

// Marquee

for Public Engagement

Salsa Night with DJ Juan Radio Maria, 10:30pm

Industry Night Radio Maria, 10pm

// Marquee

SU JAN 20

Live music & karaoke

SUNDAY 13

TH JAN 31

5pm

FRIDAY 11 Karaoke with DJ Hannah Phoenix, 8pm

Cleveland Quartet Award Winner: Jasper String Quartet // Marquee

SA JAN 19

Miscellaneous

Live music & karaoke

MLK Community Celebration and Writing Contest Presentation // Office of the Vice

FR JAN 18

Symphony Orchestra

CUcomedy.com’s Comedy Karaoke The Clark Bar, 9pm Cosmopolitan Club University YMCA, 7pm

10am

Johannes Brahms’ Instrumental Music with Piano: Ian Hobson, piano, Smith Memorial Hall, 805 S. Mathews, Urbana // School of

Cleveland Quartet Award Winner: Jasper String Quartet Lois & Ernest Gullerud Diana Sheets & Stephen Levinson

Music, Sinfonia da Camera, the Center for Advanced Study, and Kranner t Center

Miscellaneous Tuesday Night Trivia Jupiter’s at the Crossing, 7pm

C A L L 3 3 3 . 6 2 8 0 • 1. 8 0 0 . K C P A T I X

WEDNESDAY 16

Corporate Power Train Team Engine

Food & Festivals Caribbean Grill Lunch To Go Refinery, 11am

Live music & karaoke Open Decks with DJ Belly Radio Maria 10pm

12 buzz January 10-16, 2013

Marquee performances are supported in part by the Illinois Arts Council—a state agency which recognizes Krannert Center in its Partners in Excellence Program.

40 North and Krannert Center —working together to put Champaign County’s culture on the map.