Buzz Magazine: March 22, 2007 by Buzz Magazine

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BUZZ STAFF volume

no.11

Cover Design • Nikita Sorokin Cover Photo • Amelia Moore Editor in Chief • Tatyana Safronova Art Director • Nikita Sorokin Copy Chief • Meghan Whalen Listen, Hear • Carlye Wisel Stage, Screen & in Between • Keri Carpenter Around Town • Evangeline Politis CU Calendar • Annette Gonzalez Photography Editor • Amelia Moore Designers • Agatha Budys, Maria Surawska, Renee Okumura Calendar Coordinators• Caitlin Cremer, Katie Heika, Bonnie Steinberg Photography • Amelia Moore, Greg HInchman Copy Editors • Lisa Fisherkeller, Emily Ciaglia, Ilana Katz, Whitney Harris Staff Writers • Brian McGovern, Carlye Wisel, Amy Meyer Contributing Writers • Michael Coulter, Seth Fein, Mike Ingram, Kim Rice, Ross Wantland Sales Manager • Mark Nattier Marketing/Distribution • Brandi Wills Publisher • Mary Cory

TALK TO BUZZ e-mail: buzz@readbuzz.com write: 512 E. Green St. Champaign, IL 61820 call: 217.337.3801 We reserve the right to edit submissions. Buzz will not publish a letter without the verbal consent of the writer prior to publication date. Buzz magazine is a student-run publication of Illini Media Company and does not necessarily represent, in whole or in part, the views of the University of Illinois administration, faculty or students. First copy of Buzz is FREE, each additional copy is $.50 © Illini Media Company 2006

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UNDER THE COVER |1-3| 3 3 3 |4-5| 4

| 6 - 11 | 6 7 8 9 10 | 12 - 13 | 12

| 14 - 17 | 14 15 16 17 | 18 - 20 | 19 19 20 | 21 | | 22 - 24 |

INTRO This Modern World • Tom Tomorrow Life in Hell • Matt Groening First Things First • Michael Coulter

AROUND TOWN Community Snapshot with Bella Home • Suzanne Stern

LISTEN, HEAR The Faint Concert Review • Amy Meyer The Faint Interview Murder by Death’s New Album • Erin Gillman Album review CU Sound Revue • Mike Ingram

THE HOOPLA Coffee and the People Who Love It • Tatyana Safronova

STAGE, SCREEN & IN BETWEEN Spirits from the Sky • Cliff White Huge Screen vs. Small Scenes • Jeff Gross Dear Bookworm... Book Review

THE STINGER Doin’ it Well • Kim Rice & Ross Wantland Jonesin’ Crosswords • Matt Gaffney Free Will Astrology

CLASSIFIEDS CU CALENDAR

tatyana safronova EDITOR’S NOTE Isn’t it weird how we young people have become those people we thought were old? We spend long hours at work, we argue phi losophy over coff ee and alcohol, and — most notably — we shake hands when we meet each other. We prepare elaborate meals. We now use semicolons, compile resumes and worry about the future of our nation. We worry about relationships and marriage, and act considerate without being told to do so. All this makes me wonder: What did we do as kids? How did we act differently? When I was a kid, I loved watching cartoons, and I always thought that adults couldn’t see them. Cartoons to me were like Magic Eye books, and adults just didn’t know how to do it properly. I really thought we saw different things when I watched cartoons together with my parents. Looking back at it now, it was perhaps their disinterest in those things in the first place that made them look like they weren’t even watching. When I was young, I vehemently defended the existence of Santa Claus, even despite my own best reasoning skills and peer pressure. I wanted to believe that my parents weren’t lying to me, and I think my parents wanted to save face, so

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they still half-jokingly refer to Santa when it’s time for presents on Christmas. Back then I also believed that the sun set into a little pocket in the Earth instead of going around the planet. In the morning, it would emerge out of that pocket for yet another day. When I was a kid, as I lay in bed at night and rubbed my eyes, I was amazed by the colorful patterns that appeared on the black ceiling. I also loved animal fur and wondered why my mother’s hats felt so soft and smooth; I didn’t get a pet until much later. Now, I happen to know that the earth isn’t fl at and that there is no Santa. But I don’t know if I’m more rational now. I have the same attitude as I used to have about the adults and my cartoons as I now do about Americans and my Russian fi lms and songs. I refuse to believe that they understand the story lines and hear the melodies. But perhaps now, I’m also more aware. Now, instead of being awed by my mother’s fur, I smell my cashmere-wool blend sweater and pick up on a faint scent resembling stronger smelling fur hats and coats. I realize that even if the product is not as smooth as fur, it doesn’t mean there are no animals in it. I now shake hands and answer phone calls in a business-like manner. And somewhere in the back of my mind, I wonder what I’ll think about another 15 years from now.

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buzz weekly •

MEET MY CAT SNOW. I’M STARVING!

michael coulter FIRST THINGS FIRST

What’s in a quote? The words of famous philosophers in question

I was talking to a friend the other day (I won’t use his actual name since I’m about to call him an idiot) and he stated something as fact. I asked him if he was sure it was true and he said yes, he had heard someone else say it. Well, it always sort of bugs me when people believe something just because someone has said it. Mere statement of what you believe to be true doesn’t necessarily make it a fact. This column would probably be a perfect example of this point, but whatever. Recently, I came across some famous philosophy quotes that I usually just sort of take at face value, but because of this friend, I thought it might be fun to take a closer look at them. OK, it probably wont be all that much fun, but stick with me. “The unexamined life is not worth living.” — Socrates. Well, far be it for me to argue with Mr. Kingshit philosopher, but I’m not sure that’s completely true. I mean, I get the point, you have to look at yourself to understand yourself and have a meaningful life. See though, I’m not so sure. Personally, every time I spend much time taking a deep inventory of myself and the way I am, I end up feeling sort of creepy, shallow and just plain lazy, maybe even a little sad. On the other hand, if I sort of cruise through and pay attention to not much of anything, I usually have a big stupid grin on my face. Trust me, there’s a certain understated happiness in not having a fucking clue. “I think, therefore I am.” — Rene Descartes. If this quote is actually true, then there’s a good chance I’ve spent quite a bit of my life thus far not existing, just ask my dad. I can’t tell you the number of times he pointed out that sometimes I just don’t think. I always sort of felt bad when he said it, but now I feel even worse about it. Essentially he was saying that not only am I a complete dumbass, but that I’m also not real. I had no idea he was so metaphysical. “One cannot step twice in the same river.” — Heraclitus. This is a statement about how reality is always ebbing and flowing and how no instance is ever repeatable. I suppose he’s right in a universal way, that even if something feels the same, the circumstances will somehow be different. I don’t know though. What if I said “One cannot step twice in the same dog shit?” I mean, I’ve done that before, and I gotta say, it ends up feeling pretty much the same to me every damned time

it happens. The river is always moving, but you know what, it seems like the dog shit is always pretty much the way you left it. “We live in the best possible of all worlds.” — Gottfried Wilhelm Leibniz. Yeah, maybe, but remember this dude lived from 1646 to 1716. Something like that is much easier to say when you don’t have a moron leading your country. That’s probably not fair. I’m sure there were idiot politicians back then, too. Still, I think the point is that if everything were perfect, we would lose our free will, which is actually what we crave the most. God gave us problems so we could be fulfilled. That’s the thing about God; he’s usually sort of a pain in the ass and he’s freaking right all the damned time. I love him and all, but sometimes he really pisses me off. “If a tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it, does it make a sound?” — Bishop George Berkeley. In all fairness, I think the Bishop only said “To be is to be perceived,” but then somebody read that, got all Cheech and Chong, and made up the quote about the tree in the forest. My favorite answer to this question came from a guy I had a few classes with in college. His simple response was, “Who gives much of a shit either way?” I appreciate the philosophers and I do enjoy pondering their ideas, but on the other hand, I can’t help but think of the quote from Bull Durham. “Don’t think too much. It can only hurt the team.” “Ent it ies shou ld not be mu lt ipl ied u n nece s sa r i ly.” — Wi l l i a m of Ock h a m. I really like this one, actually. It seems to me he’s basically saying not to make things harder than they are. It’s almost an anti-philosophy philosophy. You know what you know, or at least what you think you know, and that’s pretty much it. You can add this or that to the equation, but it all comes back to the basic thing. Maybe I just like it because I’m lazy. “The life of man is solitary, poor, nasty, brutish and short” — Thomas Hobbes. Man, I bet that fella is a crapload of fun to have a couple of drinks with on a Friday evening. You know what though, sometimes I would probably agree with him. The thing is, it’s not always that way. Every so often, it’s pretty cool and sort of lovely and you actually feel happy. I’m just saying, nobody goes to see a movie where everything works out just fine for the person all the way through. It’s all the crappy moments that make the nice moments so special. There’s never a better time to recognize this than in the spring.

OOPS! WE MADE A MISTAKE • Although buzz strives for accuracy, we sometimes make mistakes. If you catch something we didn’t,

please let use know at buzz@readbuzz.com. When a correction is needed, it will be listed here.

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ONE-STOP SHOP Bella Home, downtown Urbana’s newest addition SUZANNE STERN • STAFF WRITER | PHOTOGRAPHS BY AMELIA MOORE

Cathy Murphy, general manager for Bella Home, points towards a photo board in the “teen room” of her store. The photos are of the designers of the room, two 14-year-old girls, McKenzie Kirby and Mahala Kneller, whose parents own and work at Bella Home.

alking up the stairs to Bella Home, located at 110 Main St. in downtown Urbana, is a little bit misleading, because it is like a pathway into another world. Cathy Murphy, the general manager, greets you right away and you automatically feel as though you’re walking into her home. Bella Home is a store that is laid out like a trendy apartment with several different rooms, each one with a theme for a certain part of the house. It is a one-stop shop; you can decorate your entire home and fill your closet in one visit. The sturdy brick walls of the building line each room, and the manicured wood flooring allows for the click-clack of Murphy’s high heels as she leads though each part. One of the rooms is set up like a dining room. The long, INTRO | A ROUND TOWN | L ISTEN, HEAR | THE HOOPLA | STAGE, S CREEN &

rectangular table is set so you expect the first course to be served momentarily. Murphy explains that the flatware is made by the brand Julisca, which models its design after 14th century styles. The dishes are sturdy, but designed so that one would never guess. “We’re in the process of setting up a gift registry for brides, or just couples who have been married for 20 years and are sick of what they started with,” she says. Bella Home is owned by Carmen Davis Kirby, who also is co-owner of Davis Electrics, as well as the owner of Bella Mia, a boutique in Champaign. The mother of three had the idea of a home store for a long time, but it wasn’t until she found the space at 110 Main when the idea was really thrown into action. Murphy, a faithful customer at Bella Mia, was called in B ETWEEN | CLASSIF EDS | THE STINGER | CU CALENDAR

early November and within four months Bella Home was open for business (the store’s opening day was Feb. 28). The tour continues through the living room area of the store, where the couches and chairs are just itching for a good conversation over cocktails, followed by a room with chiefly cocktail napkins, entertaining CDs, stationery and tablecloths. This room is facing Main Street, and the March sunshine filters through the windows, making all the colors seem even more vibrant than before. “This building was originally a factory for Pan-O-Cakes,” Murphy says. “The company would send the cake out anywhere in the United States in the pan for just 39 cents, and there’s the original poster.” The poster is yellow and red, and below it sits water crackers and spread for the customers to sample. The bedroom is a girl’s heaven. The bedding is floral and sounds from the scene

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OSTRICH FEATHERS, ANYONE?

bright, and the multitude of pillows makes a sleepy college student want to curl up right along side the display of the different bedding patterns. Right ahead is a cappuccino machine, so for $1.50 shoppers can sip while they browse, making the store feel more like a home. Past the cappuccino machine is the shoe room. “We’ll eventually be carrying 80 styles of shoes, hopefully by early April,” Murphy says excitedly. Following the shoe room is the room for teenagers. This room is one of the most unique of all, because it was designed by Carmen Kirby’s teenage daughter and her best friend. The walls are bubblegum pink and the far wall has quotes in loopy cursive about laughter, love and friendship. There are manicure sets, iPod cases, flip flops and tank tops, as well as a bulletin board with pictures of the girls and their friends. The closet is next. Laid out like the backstage at a runway show, there are about 15 racks of clothing in the airy room. Ranging in brands from Trina Turk and Juicy Couture to Scrapbook, their idea is to have something for women of all ages. In the middle of the room, two teenage girls and another staff member are sifting through catalogs, pricing jewelry and commenting on their products. “You really have everything here, from personal fun, like clothes and shoes, to enough cocktail napkins to open your own bar and the furniture to create your living room,” said Murphy. “This space is just so perfect for Carmen’s dream, and I’m so glad everything has finally fallen together.” Bella Home general manager Cathy Murphy entertains Harley Johnson of Urbana, while Amy Wagoner Johnson explores the clothing boutique at the store. “I’m due next Friday, but we’re hoping for this weekend,” Wagoner says while rubbing her belly.

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CONCERT REVIEW: THE FAINT March 13 at the Canopy Club in Urbana

AMY MEYER • STAFF WRITER

Imagine a hipster house party in Urbana, but bigger and better. To set the scene, the room is lit solely by multicolored beams of light. They occasionally flash on and off to cause a strobe effect, while projection screens play bizarre videos to the beat of dance music. On Tuesday, March 13, the Canopy Club hosted The Faint, which was a concert that could be described as a huge dance party with trippy visual effects and tunes to get your hips swaying. The evening started with a half-hour set by Coco Coca, a local one-man band nominated for Best New Artist in the upcoming WPGU/buzz Local Music Awards. Accompanying Coca on stage was an electric guitar, a synthesizer and a huge inflated skull. Synthesized beats were looped and sampled with vocals that were hard to distinguish. The most interesting part of his set was when he played the synthesizer with the head of his guitar. Coca got two groups of kids dancing during the set, including a tall man wearing leggings and a Marge Simpson-style long, beaded necklace. Flowers Forever from Omaha also played a half-hour set with the standard bass, drums and guitar, along with the addition of trumpet, keyboards and trombone. Interestingly, some of the drum parts were played with mallets, but other than that, the extent of on stage excitement involved slow swaying. Along with slow breakdowns, portions of a few songs sounded like an opening track to a western film, or a bullfight. Their lyrics were along the lines of “Flowers, flowers, you will save us, cover our eyelids, you will save us.” After surprisingly short sets from the opening bands, The Faint came on and opened with “Dropkick the Punks.” The backdrop consisted of three projection screens that played videos to go along with the lighting effects and upbeat music. The band danced along to their songs and got the crowd jumping. Surprisingly, more people were pushing and jumping than dancing. The Faint played some slower songs that the crowd did not seem to recognize, along with songs like “Worked Up So Sexual” from their album Blank-Wave Arcade. “Posed to Death” and “Glass Dance” from Danse Machabe were played, in addition to “Desperate Guys,” “I Disappear” and “Birth” off of their latest record, Wet From Birth, which composed the majority of their set. Although the opening bands were slow, if a person was not dancing by the closing song, “Agenda Suicide,” there is seriously something wrong with them.

Todd Fink of The Faint rocks out during their show on Tuesday, March 13. PHOTO BY AGATHA BUDYS

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BUZZ: Where did it all begin? JACOB THIELE: The band started when Todd [Fink, vocalist] and Joel [Petersen, bassist] were interested in doing something creative. They were skateboarders, so, you know, cold Nebraska winters, stuck indoors, you have a lot of creative energy, and [are] looking for an outlet for that. They let Toddâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s little brother, Clark [Baechle] play drums in the band after awhile. There were some different people in the band and at some point they wanted to change their sound because they felt the two-guitar thing was just too ordinary or something. [They] added some keyboards, asked me to play keyboards in the band. Then, we tried to do more visual stuff, and Dapose came into the picture. He was just going to do lighting and visual design stuff, but heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a pretty awesome guitar player, so when we were writing the album and ready to go into the studio, he came up with a bunch of guitar stuff that found its way onto the record and that helped define the band, our sound and line-up. B: How would you describe your music? JT: Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re kind of all punkers, hardcore indie scene kids that realized that we thought music was most powerful when it could get you moving, and to dance. In Omaha, we would go to clubs and listen to terrible techno and house, and we realized we could pick up on which functions of the music are most effective. And in a way, that influenced our song and music writing, but weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re a bunch of punk kids who make dance music that borrows elements from techno/ electronic music. B: What made you decide to integrate more visual elements into live shows? JT: I think we all consider ourselves artists. We all went to college for art and design. We all took college level art classes. I think that kind of thing comes more naturally to me than the music. Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re interested in all forms of art and creative stimulation. sounds from the scene

B: What is unique about your band? JT: I think that we also have a unique way of looking at song writing. We stick to pop song format, but we like to make music choices based on what is not being done at the moment. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s just a taboo, [an] unspoken rule, that at this point and time, certain styles of music, certain drumbeats or certain ways of voicing melody are off limits because theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re being overused. Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re purposely trying to set ourselves apart ... We run the videos live from the stage; I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know any other band that does that. The set-up we use is the lighting comes from below instead of above. It goes back to when we played basements â&#x20AC;&#x201D; it somehow seemed appropriate for our sound, and it sets a tone. B: Where do find inspiration for your music? JT: A lot of different things. We have a lot of friends in Omaha that play music â&#x20AC;&#x201D; a lot of creative, really driven people that we surrounded ourselves with. We see them working hard and improving their craft. The improvement isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t the focus, just that they do it and are passionate about it. Anybody doing exciting things â&#x20AC;&#x201D; people that are tasteful in their execution of music, people that are doing things like that, â&#x20AC;&#x201D; [are] fresh in a way, but [itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s] so tastefully done. B: What is in the future for The Faint? JT: Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re finishing writing some songs, getting that done in the studio and then recording the [new] album. Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re going to play some shows here and there to keep ourselves interested in music, instead of just sitting around and waiting for things to happen. B: If you could let people know one thing about your band, what would it be? JT: We try and let people know everything they need to know through the music and art we make. I guess if we have something to say, we say it in our songs.

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Murder by Death’s unique sound makes us nostalgic for the Old West ERIN GILLMAN

J A PA NE S E

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• STAFF WRITER

“Screw it. If all else fails and I’m still hungover at 6:0 0, I just get d r un k again.” That’s sound advice from Adam Turla, a man who has done his fair share of pl ay i ng a nd pa r t y i ng like a rock star. He laughs shyly as he reca l ls h is “tried and true” remedies for hangovers and discusses Murder by Death’s current tour opening for Reverend Horton Heat. F i ve h o u r s i n a h o t , st ick y ca r on a Sat urd ay after noon would be e nou g h t o d a m p e n t he br ightest spir its, but the lead vocalist and guitarist for the band seems downright pleasant. When asked if the end less road tr ips to get from here to there grow old, he simply replies, “No, you just have to take what comes with tour ing.” It’s that relaxed, just-go-with-it attitude which keeps the band relatable and relaxed through the chaos of cross-countr y tou r i ng. T he se n at ive s of Bloom i ng ton, Ind iana, got together around seven year s ago to do two of their favorite things — play music and party. “The time just adds up. We had known each other from just going on and being in college, drinking and having a good time. It was more just for fun, but some opportunities came up and we just rolled with it. None of us planned in the beginning to make a career out of it,” explained Turla. That’s exactly what those oppor tunities turned into. Turla sings lead vocals with a mysterious, smoldering voice while jamming on the guitar. Sarah Balliet contributes her talents to a couple of unexpected instruments for a rock band — the cello and keys. Alex Schrodt brings life to the drums and Matt Armstrong thumbs the bass. The combination of members and talents creates the un ique sound of the haunting Old West — I’d expect them to be wearing cowboy garb and dodging bullets in a saloon shoot-out. Turla’s voice resembles a young Johnny Cash, whom they reference in songs like “Sometimes the Line Walks You.” In seven years the band has recorded and released four full-length albums, an early EP and a seven-inch tribute for their musician friend Matt Davis, who died tragically at a young age. Their most recent release, In Bocca al Lupo, has received a plethora of praise from critics and fans.

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PHOTO COURTESY OF MYSPACE.COM/MURDERBYDEATH

“The style is different. It’s supposed to be an anthology of short stories. Each song is a different story about sinners and redemption. This album is much less coherent from the others, because it’s not all about one stor y,” Turla descr ibes. It’s cur ious how the busy band members fi nd t ime to generate new ideas for songs, but that creativity keeps fans interested in the ever-changing moods and plots of their albums. W hen asked about h is blossom ing creativity, Adam replies, “It just sort of comes up. Sometimes I spend a long time working out an idea, sometimes it’s quicker, but it’s all natural.” If only we could all be so lucky. Turla has a ver y charismatic, laid-back feeling about him. There’s nothing more enticing than a down-to-earth band that’s slightly reserved and withdrawn offstage, but rea l ly knows how to amplify a crowd while on stage. Even the stars can get a little star-struck when it comes to meeting other bands. Adam Turla explained, “Well, we’re on tour with Reverend Hor ton Heat, a nd a l l the g uys in the band are such spectacular musicians that I feel in awe of their ability. They’re so talented, and I really admire them. We got to play with the Pogues, my favorite band, a while back. That was a really big deal for me. Meeting them was a little terrifying.” Another terrifying event was when Adam ate a snake egg. Yes, a real one. “I got really sick, but it was a bet I had to oblige. I had to go to the hospital, and they managed to remove it, but I got really sick.” Talk about sounds from the scene

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I COULDNâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;T SEE!

one interesting hospital visit. Adam explained that many more antics go on during a tour, one of which was happening as we spoke. The tour manager for the group is also in charge of the d r iv ing a nd, therefore, the music played in the car. â&#x20AC;&#x153;He goes on l i ne a nd dow n load s music weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll hate, because he does all the driving. Heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll pop in some terrible emo band with the sole purpose of torturing us.â&#x20AC;? A side f rom t he qu i rk s of tou r i n g a nd recording new albums, Murder by Death is ver y serious about music. They always play the song â&#x20AC;&#x153;Those Who Stayedâ&#x20AC;? at the end of a set to energize the crowd for the next band. Their work behind the scenes translates into a â&#x20AC;&#x153;dark cowboyâ&#x20AC;?-themed masterpiece on stage, and on March 27th expect only the best from this wild bunch from Bloomington. What else can you expect from a guy who had a snake rummaging around in his stomach? Come see Reverend Horton Heat, Murder By Death and The Tossers at the Highdive next Tuesday night. The doors open at 8 p.m. for the 9 p.m. show, which is 19 and over. Tickets are available in advance for $20.

album REVIEW APOSTLES OF HUSTLE The Anthem of Nowhere [ARTS & CRAFTS] MICHAEL YOHANAN

â&#x20AC;˘ STAFF WRITER

Andrew Whiteman, lead singer of the Apostles of Hustle, proudly proclaims â&#x20AC;&#x153;music is my pimp.â&#x20AC;? The bandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s sophomore album, The Anthem of Nowhere, certainly whores itself out to a frenzied collection of music styles, turning tricks that aim to unite â&#x20AC;&#x153;everyone who feels they have no voice or canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t be heard.â&#x20AC;? Band members Julian Brown, Dean Stone and Bryden Baird fi rst found their indie flavor after Whitemanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s two-month retreat in Havana, Cuba, leading to the combination of experimental rock and Latin infl uence of AOHâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s fi rst album, Folkloric Feel. AOHâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s collective music approach is definitely influenced by Whitemanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s position as the guitarist for Broken Social Scene. With The Anthem of Nowhere, AOH broadens their eclecticism, gearing themselves towards a BSS audience while remaining somewhat genuine to their international roots. The albumâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s crowd favorite is sure to be the CDâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s fi rst track, â&#x20AC;&#x153;My Sword Handâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Anger,â&#x20AC;? which provides a beautiful composition

of feedback infused guitar riff s, galloping percussions and simple yet melodious vocals that work miraculously on this track and display the Whitemanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s production genius. â&#x20AC;&#x153;National Anthem of Nowhere,â&#x20AC;? the albumâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s self-titled track, certainly provides just that, as the song cannot quite grasp any one place or feeling. Its dull lyrics achieve no power among the clutter and confusion of instruments, although the song certainly s howc a s e s t he b a nd â&#x20AC;&#x2122;s easygoing and free-flowing nature. Vocals, however, remain a constant problem throughout the album. Genuine, but far from outstanding, Whitemanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s forgettable voice falls like an anvil into his envisioned nowhere-land. This is not to say that many of the albums tracks donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t kick ass. My personal favorite, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Rafaga!,â&#x20AC;? a Latin-rock version of a Federico GarcĂa Lorca poem, perfectly expresses the bandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s enticing Buena Vista Social Club

sensationalism that would surely cause Ibrahim Ferrer (bless his soul) to shake his hips. â&#x20AC;&#x153;A Rent Boy Goes Downâ&#x20AC;? is the albumâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s pop-folk wunderkind. With a lyricism comparable to that of Paul Simon, a footstomping beat and a sentimental melody, the song flows through you like a breeze, as though you were eating a snow cone on a hot summer day. Otherwise, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Fast Pony for Victor Jaraâ&#x20AC;? and â&#x20AC;&#x153;NoNoNoâ&#x20AC;? are the only other standouts on the album, as they remain close to those infectious Latin rhythms that birthed the band. Certainly, this album and the attempted journey it takes you on will grow on you with each new listen, but unfortunately for the Apostles of Hustle, much of their audience will not make it that far. The album will leave them lost in nowhere, searching for some sort of significance. Listeners can only hope the Apostles of Hustle remain close to those Cuban roots which inspired them to create in the first place. If they donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t, they will fall deep into the nothingness that has become the fate of so many indie-folk bands of today.

The Program in Jewish Culture and Society presents d f Y g Y b h g k]h\ gdYW]U` [iYghg.

Idith Zertal Professor of History Institute for Jewish Studies, University of Basel, Switzerland

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mor y of Holocaust in the Thethe Memory of the Holocost in the Arab-Israeli ConďŹ&#x201A;ict Idith Zertal is a professor of contemporary history at the Institute for Jewish Studies at the University of Basel, Switzerland. She is the author of Israelâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Holocaust and the Politics of Nationhood (Cambridge U Press, 2006); From Catastrophe to Power (University of California Press, 1998) and co-author (with Akiva Eldar) of Lords of the Land, a history of the Jewish settlement project in the occupied territories since 1967, to be published in the US in the fall of 2007. March 28, 2007 Levis Faculty Center Reading Room 7:30pm reception to follow www.jewishculture.uiuc.edu

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sounds from the scene

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GRAPHIC DESIGN BARRRRR CRAWWWL..

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mike ingram CU SOUND REVUE

Local CDs coming from the woodwork For those who sti l l haven’t heard the recently released New Ruins CD, The Sound T hey Make, do yourself a favor a nd g e t t o E x i le on Main Street or Parasol Records and pick up a copy. You ca n even prev iew a few tracks at myspace.com/newruins. The disc is infectious, and one of the best to come out of this scene in recent years. The songs translate very well in the live setting, as you can see for yourself tonight at Cowboy Monkey, where New Ruins will share the stage with another great local, Scurvine. Also on the bill is De Novo Dahl. The show starts at 9:30 p.m. and is $5. The New Ruins MySpace page will also point you in the direction of other upcoming dates, including a Courtyard Café show with Jose Gonzales, the man behind the song behind the Sony Bravia commercial with all the bouncy balls. Ryan Groff of elsinore also has a new CD, People in the Midwest, though it won’t be out until late April. Keep an eye out for news of its release, which will mark Ryan’s first official solo effort. It appears that it will be followed by a new EP from the band, as well. Elsinore has had a whirlwind couple of years since joining the CU scene as a transplant from Charleston. This year they’re again nominated for a couple of CU music awards — best folk/ Americana band and best CD for last year’s Nothing For Design. Ryan himself is also up for a solo award in the best singer/songwriter category. Last year, the band won the writein category for best live band. Those looking to catch Ryan in a solo appearance can find him tonight at Aroma Café at 8 p.m. for free, playing with the Noisy Gators. Pulsar47 is also slated to release their first CD in the coming months. The CD title is Slow Motion Quest, and the band has already put some of the new tracks, like “Lazer Wolf,” up at myspace.com/pu lsar47. The band is making some of my absolute favorite music right now, so I’m incredibly excited to hear how the disc turns out. To catch the band live, which is quite a spectacle, head to the Iron Post on Thursday for another installment in the 7-9 Sundays series run by Jane Boxall. Pulsar will share the stage with Chicago outfit Small Town and Tritone frontman Adam Wolfe. The show is $3.50, or $3 with a flyer from one of the bands. No shows in town for Casados this week, as they hit the road on Friday for the first leg of a nationwide tour. This run will take them to the East Coast and places in between. The band

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has a new CD, Passages, that Nic and Heather Dillon are hoping to have in their hands before leaving for the tour. The next local show for Casados will be on April 7 at the Iron Post, as the band makes a stop in town as it crosses the Midwest on the way out west. Tracks from the CD are up at myspace.com/casadosmusic, as well as a tour schedule. Tell your friends. The Tractor Kings also have a forthcoming CD, the first since 2003, and this time with basically a new lineup behind frontman Jake Fleischli. If the live performances of the songs are any indication, this record will be epic. According to band members, recording is finished. Hopefully this means we’ll see the new album very shortly. That’s all for news on local releases for now, but there will be more in coming weeks. It’s a good time to be involved in the local music scene, as there are several bands that are really doing some great things. At press time, there was no music news whatsoever to report about Don Gerard. We at the CU Sound Revue are still waiting and hoping, though. In non-CD, regular show news, there’s a big, if not extremely awkward, show at the Highd ive th is Tuesday. The un l ikely bi l l teams up Reverend Horton Heat, Murder By Death and The Tossers. Three great bands with three fairly different crowds in one big show — it should make for an interesting night, assuming Tossers fans don’t just start beating the shit out of everyone else. They’ll likely be just as mesmerized by Murder By Death cellist Sarah Balliet as everyone else is though, so it should be fine. Doors open at 8 p.m., with the show starting at 9 p.m. and tickets are $20. Be there or be square. Also on Tuesday, Ken Andrews (Failure, Year of the Rabbit) will make a stop at the Double Door in Chicago. It’s not local at all, but I’m planning on being there. Failure is one of my all-time favorite bands, and I’ve been a fan of basically everything Ken’s ever done. No Champaign date, sadly, but many of you have seen his wife, Charlotte Martin, during her stops in town. Cowboy Monkey packs a one-two punch for the weekend. Friday night features the Chicago Afrobeat Project, along with local beat-meisters Fotomana, with a 9:30 start and a $5 cover. The bands will both play long sets that will surely keep the asses bumping all night long. On Saturday night, the club goes more rock with Centaur, Tummler and You Will Die. Centaur is the post-Hum project from Matt Talbott, and the band only pops up occasionally, so be sure to get out and catch the show. It starts at 10 p.m., and the cover is $5. Mike Ingram can be reached with show/music news at forgottenwords@gmail.com.

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COOL KIDS.

FEATURED EVENTS

THIS WEEK AT

DynamO Théâtre: me me me... With a talented mix of mimes, jugglers, gymnasts, and more, DynamO Théâtre excels in the art of imaginative storytelling through acrobatic movement. In me me me…, parents and children alike will delight in the adventures of Mathilda, an enthusiastic student who attempts to overcome rejection with an unexpected move that takes an entire school by surprise. Recommended for ages 8 through 12.

K R A N N E RT C E N T E R F O R T H E P E R F O R M I N G A RT S

Saturday, March 31 at 3pm

Th Mar 29

Fr Mar 30

Colwell Playhouse

Krannert Uncorked 5pm, free

Mark Morris Dance Group: Dido and Aeneas 7:30pm, $18-$36

Flex: $14 / SC & Stu 9 / UI & Yth 4 Single: $16 / SC & Stu 11 / UI & Yth 6

Enescu Ensemble 7:30pm, $2-$8

Patron Co-sponsors Dorothy Buzzard Anonymous

Mark Morris Dance Group: Dido and Aeneas 7:30pm, $18-$36

Stuttgart Chamber Orchestra Leon Fleisher, conductor and piano Leon Fleisher, the extraordinary American conductor, pianist, and renowned instructor at the Peabody Conservatory of Music, is the soloist in Mozart’s Piano Concerto in A Major, K. 414, even as he leads this refined European ensemble in symphonies by Boccherini and Haydn.

Patron Sponsors Nancy and David Morse Jack S. Baker Patron Co-sponsors Janet and Ralph Simmons

An Imaginary Invalid 7:30pm, $6-$13

Corporate Silver Sponsor

Patron Co-sponsors Masako and Wako Takayasu Anonymous

Other School of Music Events

Sa Mar 31 Guest Artist Recital: Arte Bella L’Amour Vange: Love and Revenge in Cantatas and Airs of the Baroque Charlotte Mattax, director and harpsichord with Sherezade Panthaki, soprano, and Benjamin Hayek, viola da gamba Smith Memorial Hall, Recital Hall 805 S. Mathews; Urbana 4pm, free

Patron Co-sponsors Masako and Wako Takayasu Anonymous An Imaginary Invalid 7:30pm, $6-$13

Patron Co-sponsors Dorothy Buzzard Anonymous

333.6280 8 0 0 . K C PAT I X

Patron Season Sponsors Dolores and Roger Yarbrough

Marquee performances are supported in part by the Illinois Arts Council— a state agency which recognizes Krannert Center in its Partners in Excellence Program.

sounds from the scene

Chamber Music Series Sponsors: Jean and Howard Osborn

Arts for Kids with the Mark Morris Dance Group: Movement and Music 11am, free DynamO Théâtre: me me me... 3pm, $4-$16

Chamber Music Series Sponsors Jean and Howard Osborn

Creative Intersections Sponsor

Corporate Silver Sponsor:

Sa Mar 31

Foellinger Great Hall

Prelude with Leon Fleisher and members of the Stuttgart Chamber Orchestra 6:30pm, free

Stuttgart Chamber Orchestra 7:30pm, $10-$34

An Imaginary Invalid 7:30pm, $6-$13

Saturday, March 31 at 7:30pm Flex: $32 / SC & Stu 27 / UI & Yth 18 Single: $34 / SC & Stu 29 / UI & Yth 20 Choral Balcony: $15 / UI & Yth 10

Corporate Power Train Team Engine Members

40˚ North and Krannert Center, working together to put Champaign County’s culture on the map.

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the

hoopla

coffee and the people who love it

Ask Herriott about his trips; he has a stack of photographs from his latest trip to Costa Rica. Ask him about the African coffees; because of the humidity, African coffees have a high content of malic acid, which expresses fruit notes reminiscent of blueberries when the beans are roasted at temperatures of up to 430 degrees. Ask him all this during the monthly “cuppings” at the roastery. During a cupping, hot water is poured over a tablespoon of coffee grounds and left to steep. Then with your nose over it, you break the hardened surface of the liquid and an aroma — at its most fragrant — escapes. Finally, you slurp the coffe, as the fl avors consume all the taste buds in the mouth.

TATYANA SAFRONOVA • EDITOR IN CHIEF | PHOTOGRAPHS BY AMELIA MOORE

offee is my drug of choice. I drink it cautiously and I set rules: I can’t be full when I drink it and I don’t have more than one shot of espresso in the evening. And I only drink espresso drinks. “Small cappuccino, please.” An espresso macchiato, perhaps — that’s an espresso with a sliver of foam on top — if I like the cafe’s espressos enough to drink them raw. An iced latté, maybe, when I can’t stomach the warmth. And no sugar. When did I get like this? Why did I move away from the sugary coffee drinks of high school? When I started drinking “coffee”,

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I thought I was a hotshot, ordering Frappuccino Blended Coffee instead of Frappuccino Blended Creme from Starbucks. There was one, a favorite, that blended a brownie into the mix. It was to die for. (We all say things about Starbucks, but they can really please a sweet tooth.) I got to where I am today when I realized I couldn’t consume that much sugar and, ironically, when I realized I hated the taste of coffee. It took me a couple of years to sit down and really enjoy it in its pure form. For me, coffee became a treat, an escape from average and overpowering fl avors like “sweet.”

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I once read that as we age, our taste buds dull; candy doesn’t taste as sweet and vegetables don’t taste as bitter. As we grow, we learn to pick out the fruity notes in our coffees, the nutty fl avors in our wines, and we learn to love cheese, no matter how pungent and expensive it is. Maybe we would have been even keener tasters as kids, but who would give children caffeine? And so as we age, we have to learn to taste our drink with appreciation and diligence, because the effort on the part of roasters and brewers is just as intense as our search for a challenging taste. Take, for example, a lesson from Latin America. Michael Wells, owner of the downtown Champaign café Aroma, traveled to South America, to the Caribbean and to Mexico, places where coffee farming is heavily concentrated. “If you go to any Latin American country and ask for a coffee, fi rst of all you’re going to get an espresso,” he said. Instead you have to ask for an American coffee, in which case you’re either going to be served an Americano — an apt name for an espresso diluted with water — or instant coffee. Even if we do enjoy a shot of espresso or a frothy cappuccino now and then, we don’t know how to enjoy them properly, said Heather Pulcini, owner of the Serene Bean Café in Champaign. “You don’t drink it through a lid, don’t pour sugar over it and stir it up. … There’s actually really a certain way to pour your sugar through.” She simulated the technique on my cappuccino, small and unsweetened, of course. (She takes hers the same way.) “You pour it so it’s just in one spot. And you take your straw and you stir it just a little bit,” she said. Her stirring was miniscule, the cup of cappuccino untroubled. “You learn that overseas. … Nobody ever really gets taught how to drink coffee here. … I mean, look at our world. We’re a corporate busybody world, you know? We get some people who think about the economy and about the environment and think about all that stuff, and you get people who just gulp.” She opened her business only seven months ago in a town where Starbucks and Espresso Royale are just down the street. However, like the rest of us who don’t pay attention to standards and apprehension as we gulp our large coffees, she is unfazed.

Mark Herriott is a frequent name dropped in conversations; he’s a source of information and advice for Heather Pulcini and her budding café; he’s Aroma’s weekly source for its coffee of the day; and he’s the constant supplier of Café Kopi, on the other side of the block from Aroma. Kopi was the fi rst coffee shop in the area when it opened in December 1993. In fact, it was the Michael Wells’ hub when he and his wife discussed how to turn around their lives after they moved to Champaign from the Chicago suburbs in 2002. Paul West has been the owner of the café for the past six years. “I don’t have a really super-defi ned palette just to pick out all the … fi ner notes of the coffee,” he said. “Some people do and I don’t because I don’t spend a lot of time on it.” Perhaps that sounds bad, but there’s really more to owning the shop than cupping and picking coffees. “Today I was repair guy,” West said, “just walking around maintaining and fi xing things ... On other days, you have to be the accountant and the personnel guy.” And on other days, he’s training new staff . West used to train his employees with a book solely on brewing techniques, written by David Schomer, one of the founders of the coffee

roastery and café chain Espresso Vivace. “It doesn’t even get into the milk,” West said. Now, he’s moving more toward automation as the pool of applicants decreases with more businesses popping up around town, and as the shop gets more and more busy as it serves not only coff ee but also a wide variety of food and alcohol. West installed new equipment a month ago with specifi c brewing processes for each of his coffees. Strawberry Fields, a natural food grocer and cafe in Urbana that uses Espresso Vivace’s beans for its espresso drinks, still abides by Schomer’s techniques. Bob Burkhalter is the café manager and trains his employees for weeks on the machine that only some are allowed to use. “It’s useful, I think, to maintain that diligence,” he said. There are four variables to making an espresso: the grind of the beans — a fi ner grind is required to release the most fl avor — the pressure used to compact the grounds, the temperature of the water and the time it takes to make a shot. At 180 degrees, the water pushes through the entire cake of grounds, and in 18 to 24 seconds, the perfect shot is fi nished. If one variable is off, the results may change considerably. The grind can be influenced by humidity and the pressure by human error, in which case it may be plausible for some cafes to move toward automation, like Kopi. But Paul West’s automation at Café Kopi only goes so far; people, after all, come in for a smiling face when they stop in to replenish their energy. “You don’t want to completely eliminate the human factor. This place has got to have some personality (or) we’d put just a vending machine at the front door.” Perhaps a vending machine could design fl awless latté art — those hearts and leafs on the top of your foam — and make perfect drink every time. But then we’d again be the gulping Americans, unable to sit down and think over our cups of coffee.

The Colombian coffee dance (interpretation)

She came from four years in the Air Force and hit the ground running. She managed for Espresso Royale for four years and decided to open her own business. “This isn’t my dream café, but it’s gonna be,” she said. Before she painted the walls, did the lighting and the fans and decorated the whole place last summer, the space inside the McKinley Foundation was going to be abandoned by a non-profit cafe. Since it opened, Serene Bean developed a relationship with a fair-trade, organic roaster; arranged a deal with the McKinley Foundation to donate a portion of its money to their missions; and won over enough people during finals week in its first semester that it had to spend some 70 dollars on the shipping fee for an emergency delivery of coffee to meet the demand. “So why don’t I take the opportunity and start something small and learn how to do it,” she continued, “build it up, work with it, get it going and then, two or three years from now, people are going to know where the Serene Bean is.” Everyday, she still gets customers saying they didn’t even know the café existed. There are much more subtle facts the general public doesn’t know about coffee: where it grows, how it’s grown and by whom, and how it’s processed, roasted and fl avored. One man, Mark Herriott, is the local encyclopedia on all that and more. Herriott, owner of Columbia Street Roastery, attributes health benefits to coffee — namely, as a rich source of antioxidants — as well as his improved palate for food after years of careful attention to coffee fl avors.

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PARKLAND PLANETARIUM Spirits from the Sky, Thunder on the Land CLIFF WHITE • STAFF WRITER

egend has it that the first human child descended from the union of “The Great Red Star” (the planet Mars) and “The Bright Star” (the planet Venus) and that all the people on earth hail from these two great figures of the night sky. No — this isn’t some racy Greco-Roman creation myth that wasn’t covered in school. This tale of heavenly body lovemaking is a Skidi creation story told to children to emphasize the grandeur of the sky and to instill respect for the stars. By noticing the paths of these planets at night, the Skidi people also devised this story to explain the unusual patterns that these planets create in the sky. The Skidi (pronounced Skee-dee) people are the wolf band and one of the four tribes of the Pawnee Native American Nation. It is the Skidi traditions which capture center stage at the William Staerkel Planetarium at Parkland College. Through the exhibit, Spirits from the Sky, Thunder on the Land, viewers are treated to a glimpse of the rich heritage of the Skidi people. Their ancestral home was located in eastern Nebraska and northern Kansas, but they were relocated to Oklahoma in the 1870s. Although the Skidi no longer reside in the place of their cultural origin, the traditions that their ancestors began through telling these myths about the skies have continued. Reclining in navy blue chairs, patrons will be captivated by the stunning visual display of the night sky and told of the various meanings the stars had for the Skidi people.

The show is narrated by a Grandfather who tells his grandchildren how his father told him about the sky and the relationship mankind has to it. According to the narration, the stars served as the ancient Skidi people’s “clocks, calendars and compass.” The Skidi people constructed their entire culture around their observations of the night sky. For the Skidi, the sky is called “tirawahut,” or the center of everything. It is this relationship between the sky, land and man which must be in balance. Everything, from the way they designed their clothing, pouches, drums and even homes to the festivals to celebrate life and to pray to the heavens, centered on the great figures above. Many constellations which are a part of the Greco-Roman pantheon of astronomy hold an important place in the Skidi tradition of star gazing as well. For instance, the Big and Little Dippers of the Greek cosmology, are called the “Stretchers” in the Skidi custom. They see the constellation as two stretchers which carry the gods across the sky. With the intricately detailed North American sky projected onto

the domed ceiling, the Planetarium creates a perfect cloudless night for the viewers to marvel at the beauty of the stars. Other constellations are “Seven Brothers,” which is the name given to what is known as the Pleiades, and the “Swimming Ducks,” which describes the tail of Scorpio. While Spirits from the Sky, Thunder on the Land may not be the most extravagant light show ever, it provides a glorious insight into the culture of a people rarely exhibited. The exquisite beauty of nature is what this show recreates and in a place where the stars are dimmed by lights, it’s nice to see them any way possible. This is the last weekend to see this spectacular show on Friday and Saturday at 8 P.M. at the William Staerkel Planetarium at Parkland College. Adult tickets are $5, but students pay only $3 and it’s worth it.

ACCORDING TO THE SKIDI TRADITION, THE BIG AND LITTLE DIPPERS FORM STRETCHERS THAT CARRY THE GODS ACROSS THE SKY.; PHOTO COURTESY OF WWW.IMAGES.GOOGLE.COM.

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EVERYWHERE IS WITHIN WALKING DISTANCE IF YOU HAVE THE TIME.

Is Bigger Always Better ?

PHOTO COURTESY OF STRANGEZOO.COM

HUGE SCREEN VS. SMALL SCENES JEFF GROSS • STAFF WRITER

nyone who has ever seen a movie at an Imax or Omnimax theater will tell you that it’s an experience all on its own. With their giant, convex screens that encompass your whole peripheral and subwoofers that overshadow any NBA player, Imax and Omnimax films immerse you into the film in a way a regular theater screen can‘t … but that doesn’t always make it worth the ticket price. For visual films such as Episode III: Revenge Of The Sith, Spider-Man and even Pirates of the Caribbean, it’s well worth the experience and $10+ fee, but who the hell needs to shell out that

sounds from the scene

much cash to see Night At The Museum (in fact, why bother spending any money to see that P.O.S.)? It’s often the case that Imax/Omnimax films are simply overpriced for what they offer. Sure, I’d like to see any movie on “the big screen,” but I’m not going to double my ticket fee just so that the animated car is twice as big. That said, we have plenty of nice theaters here in Cornfield, USA. Of the three theaters locally available (Boardman’s Art Theatre, Goodrich Savoy 16 and Carmike Beverly Cinema 18), we have two solid choices. Boardman’s has a limited, but great selection of

art films from the indie circuit that it plays with great sound/picture quality. The seats are pretty comfy, too. Savoy’s a bit more expensive, but with 16 screens, it’s got a nice selection of films that it can make available to the public. Savoy also has stadium seating with reclining chairs — a big plus. Beverly (the theater located next to Meijer), on the other hand, is a complete piece of shit. I cannot tell you how many times I’ve seen a movie at Beverly (out of mere location convenience — unlike Savoy 16, it’s on a bus route) and either the sound or video gets fucked up. The worst

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part is that every time I inform a manager about this, they merely say “I’m sorry.” They usually attempt to fix the problem, but sometimes don’t. What’s worse is that they refuse to compensate the viewer with a pass to see the film again. Any other theater chain would give you a free ticket if you claimed that an employee so much as looked at you wrong, yet Beverly is too cheap to try and build customer loyalty. Simply put, Beverly (under its new management policies) is a terrible venue. If you have the opportunity, do yourself a favor and visit either Boardman’s Art Theatre or Savoy 16.

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I WANNA LIVE â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;TIL I DIE, NO MORE, NO LESS.

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The good, the bad and the ugly

The three ulitimate shit reads

KEVIN OLSEN â&#x20AC;˘ STAFF WRITER

JEFF GROSS â&#x20AC;˘ STAFF WRITER

Sometimes 2+2=5 ALINA DAIN â&#x20AC;˘ STAFF WRITER

Read This:

Less Than Zero

by Bret Easton Ellis

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CORTNEY TIDWELL

Enough is Enough:

The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald

Show: 6:30pm Doors: 5:30pm

with special guest

This is Bret Easton Ellisâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; fi rst book, preceding Rules of Attraction and American Psycho, offering an in-depth look into what rich college kids in California do with their spare time in the summer. Ellis is referred to as a Generation X author and his debut book exemplifies it in every sense. The bookâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s protagonist, Clay, comes back home after going to school out east and the book entails his struggle with love, drugs and sexual orientation and is a tailspin into self-depravity for every character the reader meets. It is a harrowing portrait of drug culture and sexual exploitation of wealthy kids in the 1980s.

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While F. Scott Fitzgeraldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s novel is labeled as a classic, there has to be a point where our culture no longer worships this book the way our teachers of old have told us that we must. Especially in our time of war and economic threat, I do not think we are currently uplifted by the story of Gatsby and his long-lost love Daisy. This is a great American novel, but only in its time and I think it is about time we move on and make a new category of classics.

So hereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a good list of books to pick up just in case you eat a few too many tacos at Chipotle and need a good, long read ... without further adieu, I present you with the three ultimate shit reads of all time.

1. Welcome To The Monkey House by Kurt Vonnegut Jr. Vonnegut is one of the most bizarre and talented contemporary writers and this collection of short stories features some of his fi nest work. From the dystopian commentary on the virtues of egalitarianism to Vonnegutâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s chilling view of morality in the eponymous novella, Welcome To The Monkey House is one of the best collections of short stories ever.

2. America: The Book by Jon Stewart

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s utterly hilarious and you donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have to read it in any specific order to get a good laugh; thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not to mention the fact that itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s disturbingly educational. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the perfect supplement for both PS 101 and a roll of T.P.

3. 1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die

Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t Waste Your Time:

by Steven Jay Schneider

by Charlotte BrontĂŤ

This is by far the ultimate shit read for anyone who likes to watch movies. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a collection of insightful, but short articles on what several writers believe to be the most important and entertaining fi lms in almost a decade of cinema (which makes it perfect for those quick deuces too). With 1001 fi lms, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s almost guaranteed to have interesting articles on many of the fi lms you love and numerous fi lms that youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll soon want to see.

Jane Eyre

This is another classic novel, but not in a way that anyone needs to read it anymore. It is an excruciatingly long, boring book. It is boring because it deals with issues that are now old and no longer relevant. Jane tells the tale of a girl who lives her life independently and overcomes the norms of society, but in the end she marries into a high social class, contradicting her previous sense of morality, thus calling her character into question.

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This spring, reading a good book might be a nice way to relax and absorb yourself in another world. Forget reading things you have to â&#x20AC;&#x201D; like textbooks, spreadsheets and Excel graphs â&#x20AC;&#x201D; and read something you want to. Let your mind wonder with these three extraordinary books:

1. The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde

If you are into the myster ious and the unexplained, read The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde. It is the story of a man who stays forever young and handsome on the outside, yet turns selfi sh and evil on the inside. At the same time, a painting of him reflects his inner corruption by slowly aging and growing more revolting with each passing year. It is as much gothic and frightening as it is an intelligent work of satire, philosophy and social criticism.

2. Brave New World by Aldous Huxley

Within the genre of science fiction, the supposedly utopian future of Brave New World by Aldous Huxley describes a society in which humans are no longer naturally born, but genetically engineered into social castes. Humans continuously take in drugs to avoid their emotions and the concepts of mother and father no longer exist. Unlike George Orwellâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s 1984, what strikes a chord is that this version of the future clashes with a part of the world which is still â&#x20AC;&#x153;traditionalâ&#x20AC;? in a dramatic and heart-wrenching way. You may find yourself shedding a few tears, but this is one of those books that is remembered long after being read.

3. The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini

This book is a modern and eye-opening sounds from the scene

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novel. This is the story of a young boy from a wealthy family, growing up in pre-Russian invasion Afganistan. A tragic mistake forces the boy to separate from his servant and best friend, and war leads him to flee to the United States. Years later he ventures on a dangerous journey back to his native countr y, facing Taliban soldiers and potential death, all to confront his own conscience and redeem himself. Although the book does turn somewhat clichĂŠ towards the second half, it is nevertheless intelligent, touching and reminds us that behind different cultures and languages, all people everywhere

Saved by the break KATE KROGER â&#x20AC;˘ STAFF WRITER

I love to read â&#x20AC;&#x201D; really, I do. I am an English major at heart, but somehow, between the cracks of my busy life (Facebook, e-mail, homework, naps, etc.) my free minutes seem to mysteriously disappear â&#x20AC;&#x201D; and with them goes my ability to satisfy this love of mine with the literature it deserves. But, luckily for you and I, spring break is here to save the day. It is the perfect time to catch up on a classic or two, and I have a few suggestions from my own literary history to help you out:

Avoid: The

Great Gatsby

by F. Scott Fitzgerald

If youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re looking for clichĂŠ â&#x20AC;&#x201D; then this is the choice for you! It features Gatsby, Daisy and Tom, wealth, destruction and the good old American Dream, and it has been taught, and re-taught and rere-taught in probably every high school everywhere. I may be bitter because of the ungodly amount of critical essays I had to read about this one, but frankly, I couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t care less what the green light on the dock symbolizes. Good riddance, Gatsby.

Seek Out: Dandelion

by Ray Bradbury

Wine

If the warm weather hasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t already put you in the mood for a nice long summer, then this book surely will. It is a refreshing change from some of Bradburyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s other work; warm, personal and moving. It vividly pours life into every possible image of summer and invites you to step inside. The characters and their growth are beautiful and refreshing, their adventures both memorable and significant. I guarantee it will leave you feeling a little sunnier.

Favorite:

The Awakening

by Kate Chopin

I read The Awakening as a summer reading assignment, days before my junior year of high school, on a camping trip. It was so empowering, thought-provoking and addictive that I fi nished it that very night â&#x20AC;Ś by fl ashlight. It is the unconventional story of Edna Pontellier, wife and mother, who decides that maybe she wants something a bit different than the life she leads. It is courageous and honest, and it changed who I was. I would recommend it to anyone. sounds from the scene

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â&#x20AC;&#x153;The problem with not having anybody to tell you what to do, I understood, is that there was nobody to tell you what not to do.â&#x20AC;? This quote sums up the source of Augusten Burroughsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; problems in Running With Scissors. Burroughs learned how to live his life in quite an unconventional fashion: living in his motherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s psychiatristâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s house with an eclectic collection of preteens smoking cigarettes, grown women eating kibble and various welcomed rodents. As a child, Augusten swooned for reflective surfaces and freshly-ironed slacks. He believed his mother to be the most glamorous woman in the world with her teased hair, Parliaments and red patent-leather pumps. She began her mental breakdown when Augusten was around 12 and decided the best decision would be to send him to live with her psychiatrist, Dr. Finch, and his family. The world of the Finches was filled with dirty language, Christmas all year long, electroshock therapy, crushed Valium and a hole

in the roof. That mash of insanity is exactly why the book is so appealing. It took Augusten time to adapt to their illogical lifestyle, but eventually he fit right in with the wild bunch. Dr. Finch adopted a young man named Neil Bookman, who was around age 33 when Augusten joined the clan. Bookman and Augusten set in motion a very strange relationship, while Augustenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s mother sank deeper into her depressive/bipolar state. I recommend reading this memoir as soon as you can get your hands on it. I realize Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m a little behind the curve in reading it now, but it was wellworth the trip to Borders. Running with Scissors will keep you entertained with witty humor and graphic descriptions. While reading this book, you may feel the sudden urge to dance around to The Osmonds and eat crayons, but please refrain. Just sink into your couch and drift through the bizarre world of Augusten, who tried his best to keep his head above water and a sliver of sanity in his warped mind.

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the stinger

kim rice & ross wantland DOIN’ IT WELL

The spring break issue(s) Redefining what it means to have a hot, sexy spring break

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jonesin CROSSWORD PUZZLE

“Use Your Noodle”- -a halfbaked quotation. by Matt Jones

Across 1 Masi of “Heroes” 4 Vows sometimes rushed in comedy movie weddings 8 Seek, as a goal 14 ___-10 Conference 15 Charge alternative 16 Big name in fragrances 17 Anonymous culinary quip, part 1 19 Candy subject to a 2002 vote 20 “Would ___ to you?” 21 “You know where you can stick it!” 23 Line dance 25 Where to get mil. mail

26 “The Wonder Years” character 30 Doc seen for head colds 32 Big’___ (Al Bundy’s favorite magazine) 34 Orange component 35 Quip, part 2 39 It may be signified by raising a sign 40 Author Tolstoy 41 Gas station freebie 42 Bug 43 Quip, part 3 47 “___ boy!” 48 “That’s great news!” 49 “___ trip” (former hiphop magazine) 50 Like some tempers 52 Newsman Koppel 54 How orchestra musicians respond

58 Low-risk proposition 61 Name hidden in Hirschfeld caricatures 62 Giovanni of “Saving Private Ryan” 65 Quip, part 4 67 Kicks to the curb 68 Cookie with orange filling in October 69 It usually ends in septembre 70 Tony-winning play during the time of Henry II 71 “Shinola, Vol. 1” band 72 Thesaurus wd. Down 1 Vision-related 2 Painter Frida 3 Flip ___ 4 Tend to a sprain

5 Uninspired pet name in “Hi and Lois” 6 Milo of “Barbarella” 7 Heavy track item 8 Supplier of unsuccessful Road Runner traps 9 Drill bit end 10 Metal band with the final album “Reinventing the Steel” 11 Lieberman’s party in the 2006 election (abbr.) 12 Sleep stage 13 South Africa’s highest ranked golfer Ernie 18 Silver Bullet Band leader Bob 22 Led Zeppelin drummer John 24 ___-Saxon 27 Drop by 28 Opening 29 Fargo’s st. 31 Wee 33 Waterway from Rouen to Dijon 35 Actor Colin of “Nanny McPhee” 36 “___ Billie Joe” 37 Until now 38 Newman’s Own rival 39 Petting zoo noises 44 Bad thing to get on a trip 45 Bert feature 46 Former Clinton staffer Shalala 51 There’s no accounting for it 53 Tractor maker John 55 Uses as a source 56 Accord 57 Gone from the table? 59 Gesture during a 1968 Olympics ceremony 60 You, a long time ago 62 Civil War soldier 63 “___ heard enough” 64 Lighter maker 66 Ages and ages

answers on pg. 20

sounds from the scene

Ross recently had an opportunity to do a callin program on the “horrors” of spring break. The program focused on a very stereotypical (and expensive) version of the spring break: traveling to some exotic warm location, drinking a lot, hanging out on a beach and having sex. Included in this discussion were some of the facts about drinking and sexual safety; for instance, individuals who have been drinking are seven times less likely to use condoms. But the overarching question the hosts wanted answered seemed to be, how can we protect the women on spring break from the unsafe conditions into which they place themselves? One problem we see with conversations like these is they totally erase men’s involvement and responsibility during spring break. It is pretty offensive to just assume that men’s violence is inevitable. Because we believe and perpetuate this, we suggest that women keep away from men, because all men are violent (or have the potential to be). Another big problem with this type of message is that we’re also “protecting” women from their own sexuality. When we tell women to watch what they drink, who they are with and what messages they are sending, we are telling women, “Don’t be too sexy. That will get you into trouble.” Doin’ It Well is not about to repeat those messages. SPRING BREAK ISSUE #1: (SOME) MEN’S VIOLENCE Men’s violence against women is about men’s behavior, yet we usually focus on women’s behaviors as the solution. What would it look like if men were seen as the solution for the violence some men perpetrate? What if the spring break call-in show featured a group of men who were asked questions like, “How come some men perpetrate violence against women?” and “What violence prevention messages should men be aware of to have a safe spring break?” This approach would make the responsibility more equal, instead of the current assumption: “Men: go have fun. Women: be careful!” SPRING BREAK ISSUE #2: HOT & SEXY WOMEN The messages around women’s sexuality are clear. When they’re sexual, they’re putting themselves “at risk” (of violence, of being called names, etc.). When they’re hurt, they shouldn’t have been so sexual. Certainly, women may self-

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limit their sexuality based on their intuition. This doesn’t change the fact that women have the right to be sexual in ways that feel right to them. What would self-defined sex for women look like? That’s just it; we don’t know what it would look like because it would be self-defined. Maybe it would look a lot like the list of Women’s Sexual Rights from last week. And here are a few more: Women have the right to be sexual on spring break and not be blamed for it. Women have the right to drink, and they also have the right not to be targeted with alcohol by men for sex (or for making Girls Gone Wild videos). Women have the right to experience their sexuality for themselves, not solely for the benefit of men. SPRING BREAK ISSUE #3: HOT & SEXY MEN Most men do not perpetrate violence against women. However, men do have a role in perpetuating a culture of violence against women, and it’s up to men to change this. It’s time for men to “take sexy back” and redefine what this means. Sexy is not standing around a keg commenting on women’s bodies as objects, based on size, shape or features. Sexy is not joking about or making comments about using alcohol as a way to get sex (i.e., one more drink and she’ll be good to go). Sexy is not pressuring other men to have sex at all costs in order to prove masculinity. S e x y me n r e s p e c t wome n , a nd s e ek relationships (whether long-term or for one night) based on mutual involvement, sexual pleasure and expression. Sexy men challenge other men when they objectify women, by saying things like “That’s not cool, dude, she’s a person.” Sexy men call out their friends when they notice how drinking events are targeted toward women (buying women drinks). Sexy men talk with their friends about how hot sex is consensual and, possibly, sober. Sexy men challenge other men that there is more to sex than just having it; the experience of it can make a huge difference. By all means, be sexy. Be sexual, or choose not to. Just make sure it’s on your terms, and is deliberate, not based on what MTV tells you about how spring break should be. Kim Rice and Ross Wantland are professionals in the field of sexuality and violence prevention. Email them at buzzdoinitwell@yahoo.com. B ETWEEN | CLASSI

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free will astrology MAR. 22 — MAR. 28 ARIES

March 21 – April 19

Hundreds of years ago, the Native American tribe known as the Seneca had a rule of thumb about when to sow corn seed. You had to wait until the weather was warm enough to lie naked in the dirt without discomfort. I believe a similar principle applies to your plans to start a certain new enterprise, Aries. Hold off on the launch until you’re able to take off all your clothes in a natural setting and stretch out on the ground without shivering.

T A U RU S

April 20 – May 20

It has been too long since you visited the Middle of Nowhere. You’ve been a fixture in the heart of a well-defined Somewhere for quite some time. But now, Taurus, you need the enriching confusion of the Cosmic HUH?! it’s prime time for you to wander out into the fertile chaos of the WHAT THE HELL!? zone. Have fun! Don’t forget to writhe! Now please repeat and repeat and repeat after me, slowly building from a smirking giggle to a cackling belly-laugh, WHERE AM I AND HOW DID I GET HERE?!

GEMINI

May 21 – June 20

This would be a good week to take a class at clown school, give out free ice cream to the underprivileged, or sing show tunes to a captive audience at a retirement home. In fact, the cosmos will be very favorably disposed toward you if you do anything to increase the pleasure you bring other people. Here are some other ways you might proceed: Listen raptly to allies who’ve lost their way; think deeply about what a loved one needs most; deliver sincere praise to people you’ve never praised before; say a rowdy prayer for an acquaintance who could use a jolt of inspiration; or do a good deed anonymously, ensuring that the recipient of your blessing doesn’t know who gave it.

CANCER

June 21 – July 22

Charles Darwin called Thomas Malthus a “great philosopher,” and said his theory of evolution was based on Malthus’ ideas. Yet Malthus advocated genocidal measures to control population growth. In “Essay on the Principle of Population,” Malthus wrote: “Instead of recommending cleanliness to the poor, we should encourage contrary habits. In our towns we should make the streets narrower, crowd more people into houses, and court the return of the plague. In the country, we should build villages near stagnant pools, and encourage settlement in marshy and unwholesome situations.” So the evidence is clear that Darwin’s theories had a grotesque pedigree. Should we therefore dismiss them altogether? Not necessarily. What’s useful is not always derived from what’s good. Is there a comparable situation in your own life, Cancerian? Are there essentials you benefit from even though their origins are problematical? The time is ripe for coming to terms with weirdness like that.

LEO

July 23 – Aug. 22

The water you drink is three billion years old, give or take five million years. The stuff your body is made of is at least ten billion years old, probably older, and has been as far away as 100,000 light years from where it is right now. The air you breathe has, in the course of its travels, been literally everywhere on the planet, and has slipped in and out of the lungs of almost every human being who has ever lived. There’s much more evidence I could offer to prove to you that you’re an infinite and eternal creature, Leo, but suffice it to say that you’re much greater and older and bigger and wilder and freer than you have ever imagined. The experiences you’ll soon have will give you a deeply felt sense of how true that is.

VIRGO

Aug. 23 – Sept. 22

LIBRA

Sept. 23 – Oct.22

SCORPIO

Oct. 23 – Nov. 21

S AG I T TA R I U S

Nov. 22 – Dec. 21

CAPRICORN

Dec. 22 – Jan. 19

AQUA R I U S

Jan. 20 – Feb. 18

The secret you’re looking for, the secret you think you desperately need, does not exist--at least not officially. Unofficially, however, it’s very real. It’s alive and hot and exciting. But it’s in the care of people you don’t notice or value. It’s something you’d normally regard as cheap and insignificant. So let me ask you, Scorpio: Can you change the way you use your eyes? Will you drop the opinions that get in the way of you seeing the truth? The secret you’re in quest of, the resource that might solve so many problems, will be easy to pluck if you’ll just change your mind about matters that you imagine have nothing to do with the secret.

Flora, a Komodo dragon in a British zoo, recently became pregnant and hatched five babies without ever having had contact with a male. This is the first recorded virgin birth among her species. She’s your power animal for the coming weeks, Sagittarius. Whether you’re female or male, you too now have the power to spawn a beautiful brainchild without being intellectually or emotionally fertilized by anyone. That of course doesn’t mean you should avoid the kind of intimate interactions that would fructify you. On the contrary, I urge you to seek those out in abundance. But my point is that you don’t need them in order to be a fount of creativity.

The bumper sticker I saw today said, “Having abandoned my search for the truth, I’m now looking for a good fantasy.” Though it’s meant to be sarcastic, it’s actually a perfectly useful piece of advice for you right now. Consider this: The truth is overrated. It’s so complicated and ever-shifting that it’s impossible to pin down. To earnestly pursue it is often a waste of your valuable time and energy. Besides, why bother trying to understand the nature of reality when it’s more important and productive to aggressively shape the nature of reality? As another bumper sticker says, “Life isn’t about finding yourself. It’s about creating yourself.” In light of these meditations, Capricorn, I suggest that you drum up some fresh, fun, fabulous fantasies.

Writing in American Scientist, professor of neuroscience Irving Biederman says that human beings are literally addicted to learning new ideas. At the moment when we grasp a concept we’ve been grappling with, our brains experience a rush of a natural opium-like chemical, boosting our pleasure levels. I suggest that you take advantage of this fact to get really high in the coming week, Aquarius. Your ability to master challenging new information is at a peak, which means your access to natural opiates will be abundant.

PISCES

Feb. 19 – March 20

A pound of gold weighs less than a pound of tumbleweeds. That’s because the weight of gold is measured by the troy system of measurement, in which there are 12 ounces in a pound, whereas the weight of tumbleweeds is assessed according to the avoirdupois system, in which a pound consists of 16 ounces. Still, you’d probably rather have a pound of gold than a pound of tumbleweeds, right? Keep this in mind as you decide what resources to go after in the coming week. Homework: What was the pain that healed you most? Testify at http://FreeWillAstrology.com.

It’s the perfect time to kill off old habits that bring you down and to sever bad connections that bring out the worst in you. Therefore, I suggest you make an undercover search-anddestroy visit to the murkiest parts of the underworld. When you get back, invite skeletons to come out of the closet and monsters to crawl out from beneath the bed for a nice long heart-to-heart talk full of tough love. And in general, don’t you dare avert your gaze from any song and dance that might halfscare you and half- inspire you into triumphing over evil. P.S. In every decay there’ll be beauty; in every loss there’ll be a glimmer of future joy.

If we were going to equate your relationship options with varieties of ice cream, we might say that in the next eight weeks you will have a choice between Black Raspberry Avalanche, Caramel Toffee Bar Heaven, Cherry Chip ba da Bing, Grandma’s Cookie Dough, New York Strawberry Cheesecake, Cashew Praline Parfait, Peanut Butter Truffle, and good old Vanilla. Oddly enough, Vanilla might turn out to be the most gratifying. Of all the varieties, it would certainly have the best aftertaste.

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â&#x20AC;˘ PLEASE CHECK YOUR AD! Report errors immediately by calling 337-8337. We cannot be responsible for more than one dayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s incorrect insertion if you do not notify us of the error by 2 pm on the day of the first insertion. â&#x20AC;˘ All advertising is subject to the approval of the publisher. The Daily Illini shall have the right to revise, reject or cancel, in whole or in part, any advertisement, at any time. â&#x20AC;˘ All employment advertising in this newspaper is subject to the City of Champaign Human Rights Ordinance and similar state and local laws, making it illegal for any person to cause to be published any advertisement which expresses limitation, specification or discrimination as to race, color, mental handicap, personal appearance, sexual orientation, family responsibilities, political affiliation, prior arrest or conviction record, source of income, or the fact that such person is a student. â&#x20AC;˘ Specification in employment classifications are made only where such factors are bonafide occupational qualifications necessary for employment. â&#x20AC;˘ All real estate advertising in this newspaper is subject to the Federal Fair Housing Act of 1968, and similar state and local laws which make it illegal for any person to cause to be published any advertisement relating to the transfer, sale, rental, or lease of any housing which expresses limitation, specifications or discrimination as to race, color, creed, class, national origin, religion, sex, age, marital status, physical or mental handicap, personal appearance, sexual oientation, family responsibilities, political affiliation, or the fact that such person is a student. â&#x20AC;˘ This newspaper will not knowingly accept any advertising for real estate that is in violation of the law. Our readers are informed that all dwellings advertised in this newspaper are available on an equal oppportunity basis.

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602 E. Clark Street Fall 2007, $330-$350. F efficiencies next to Beckman. Private porch/ balcony. Water included. Parking available. Wampler Property Management 352-1335 wamplerapartments.com

711 W. Main Street, Urbana

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August 2007. Historical Buildings. Studio, 1 and 2 bedroom apts. 308 N State Street $656- $726 309 W Hill Street $577- $630 308 N Prairie Street Studios $608- $665 1 bdrm $645- $822 2 bdrm $1150- $1177 Wampler Property Management 352-1335 wamplerapartments.com

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1512 Ogelthorp, U. 3- 4 BR/ 2 Bath, 2 Car Garage. Rent $1100. 344-0674

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$610-$665 large 1 BR apts w/ hardwood floors. Units have sunporch/office. Water & heat included. On-site laundry. Parking available. Wampler Property Management 352-1335 wamplerapartments.com

Summer income opportunity in Chicago Earn $7000 as an anonymous egg donor this summer. Must be 21-29 and non-smoking. Travel to Chicago this spring necessary to donate this summer. Call Alternative Reproductive Resources at 773-327-7315 ASAP or email info@aar1.com for a prequalification form.

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In house babysitter wanted for 2 year old girl. M, T, W, TR 9am-1pm. email: eiuedukh@yahoo.com.

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Courtyard on Randolph 713 S. Randolph, C. Now leasing for August. Furnished/ Unfurnished. Spacious 2 and 3 bedrooms starting at $630. Close to campus and downtown. Water, Direct TV and parking included. Balcony, laundry and seasonal pool. (217)352-8540 www.faronproperties.com

Large 2 BR, 1 BA, free internet, central heat/ac, washer/dryer, parking included, $570 w/o utilities, 630-7394159, joekwak@sbcglobal.net

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TICKET TUESDAYS IT MAY SAVE YOUR LIFE

sounds from the scene

INTRO | A ROUND TOWN | L ISTEN, HEAR | THE HOOPLA | STAGE, S CREEN &

B ETWEEN | C LASSIFIEDS | THE STINGER | CU CALENDAR

cu calendar

THU. MAR 22 Live Bands Twick G. with special guests The Movement, Def Child and Earl Johnson Canopy Club, 9am, $5 MRS Trio Iron Post, 7pm, $2 Noisy Gators and Ryan Groff [The Noisy Gators play an acoustic set of Cajun music. Ryan Groff from elsinore opens the show.] Aroma Cafe, 8pm Caleb Rose Bowl Tavern, 9pm, no cover The Fuz Canopy Club, 9pm, $5 New Ruins, Exit Clov, Scurvine, De Novo Dahl Cowboy Monkey, 9:30pm, $5

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Concerts B.B. King [Time has only made the King of Blues more popular, more cherished and more relevant. At age 81, B.B. King still sings and plays the blues with the relentless passion and untouchable skill that have made him a living legend.] Virginia Theatre, 8pm, $77/$61/$46 DJ DJ/Gentlemen’s Club [Nothin’ but Rock.] Silver Bullet Bar, 8pm Dancing Free Swing Dance McKinley Church and Foundation, 9:30pm

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TRY GOING TO EVENTS MARKED BY THE LOGO. COME ON, YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO.

Karaoke Boneyard Karaoke Memphis on Main 8pm, no cover Karaoke with Randy from RM Entertainment Fat City Saloon, 9pm Liquid Courage Karaoke The Office 10pm Lectures/Discussions Free English Speaking, Listening Class [These classes work well for those whose native language is not English and emphasize beginning and intermediate listening and speaking skills.] Parkland College, 9am

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Recreation “Allerton Legacy” Exhibit Allerton Park 9am Miscellaneous Japan House Group Tours Japan House, 1pm Altgeld Chime-Tower Tours [To arrange a concert or Bell Tower visit, e-mail chimes@uiuc.edu or call 3336068.] Altgeld Hall, 12:30pm Meetings French Department: Pause Cafe Espresso Royale, Oregon St. (Urbana), 5pm Family Fun Group Funfare [Preschool groups are invited to come. Register with the Children’s Department in advance at 367-4069. The program will feature stories, songs, puppets and films.] Urbana Free Library, 9:45am Mind/Body/Spirit Krannert Uncorked [We’re showcasing the best in beverages. Beverages may be tasted free of charge and will be available for purchase by the glass at special discounted price during the tasting. They will also be featured for the remainder of the week on performance nights.] Krannert Center for the Performing Arts, 5pm, free Meditation and Yoga Classes [Free meditation and yoga classes that include meditation exercises, yoga postures, deep relaxation and yoga philosophy.] Ananda Liina Yoga & Meditation Center, 6pm

FRI. MAR 23 Live Bands Billy Galt Sings the Blues, Blues restaurant, 11:30am Jeff Helgesen Quintet [Jazz music.] Iron Post, 5pm, no cover Dan, Bob & Joni Hubers, 8pm, no cover John Stone Memphis on Main 8:30pm, $10 Country Connection Rose Bowl Tavern, 9pm, $1 The Fuz, Musiac Canopy Club, 9pm $5 Dan Hubbard Iron Post, 9pm, $3 Delta Kings [Rock and blues.] Cowboy Monkey, 9:30pm, cover Candy Foster and Shades of Blue Chief’s Bar and Grill, 9:30pm, $5 Chicago Afrobeat Project Cowboy Monkey, 11pm, $5-$7 DJ DJ/Gentlemen’s Club Silver Bullet Bar, 8pm DJ Mertz at Boltini House, Funk and Electro.] Boltini Lounge, 10pm, no cover Deeplicio.us [DJ Mambo Italiano. House music.] Ko.Fusion, 11pm no cover Karaoke Liquid Courage Karaoke American Legion Post 71, 8pm Workshops Scrap-booking [Bring in your photographs and make scrapbooks of different activities going on at

B.B. King

Virginia Theatre, 8 p.m. March 22, $77/$61/$46

If someone asked you to list off a set of music genres that have become popular over the past few decades, a few immediately come to mind: rock, grunge, pop and indie. What about blues? Did it just slowly fade away from the music scene? Or has it become something that lingers in the back of your mind that you don’t even think to include or mention? Blues, a genre that became popular back in the mid-1900s, has been one of the most underrated music styles in today’s society. Despite being one of the most influential movements in music history, people have come to appreciate its humble nature. Blues legend B.B. King, the 81-year-old vibrant and passionate musician, the King of Blues, will perform at the Virginia Theater with “Lucille,” his beloved guitar. Named the greatest living guitarist by Rolling Stone, this is a chance to experience talent at its finest and see how the world of blues has influenced so many styles of music today. To some, B.B. King is a god. He epitomizes grace, genius and creativity. Even at the ripe old age of 81, his music will find its way into his audiences’ souls. —Katie Heika

INTRO | A ROUND TOWN | L ISTEN, HEAR | THE HOOPLA | STAGE, S CREEN &

B ETWEEN | CLASSI

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| THE STINGER | CU CALENDAR

the center. Refreshments will be served. Those who wear green will get a special prize.] Douglass Annex, 1pm, free Miscellaneous Altgeld Chime-Tower Tours Altgeld Hall 12:30pm

SAT. MAR 24 Live Bands The Blue Addictions, The Niantic Iron Post, 6pm, $4 Alleyway Sex, Secret Agent Bill, Shot Baker [Live bands will be featured as well as The Feramoans, Carbomb Lottery and F.D.R.] IMC 7pm, $5 New Twang City Hubers, 8pm, no cover Sippy and the Night Owls Memphis on Main, 8:30pm, $4 Candy Foster and Shades of Blue [Cover band of songs such as “Disco Inferno” and “Lets Stay Together.”] Iron Post, 8:30pm, $4 Country Connection Rose Bowl Tavern, 9pm, $1 Band Hard Rock Show Chief’s Bar and Grill, 9:30pm, $5 Tummier, Centaur, You Will Die Cowboy Monkey, 10pm, $5 Concerts Community/Campus Women’s Music Series, Concert I [Concert series to promote local women in the arts. Also a fundraiser for the Center for Women in Transition.] Independent Media Center, 8pm DJ DJ/Gentlemen’s Club Silver Bullet Bar, 8pm DJ Tim Williams Highdive, 10pm, $5 DJ Wesjile [Hip-Hop, party breaks.] Boltini Lounge, 10pm, no cover Karaoke Liquid Courage Karaoke Geo’s, 9pm Film “The Wizard of Oz” (1939) [The tale of a young Kansas girl who dreams of a better world “somewhere over the rainbow.” When Dorothy is thrust into the eye of a tornado and lands in the fantasy world of Oz, she soon finds herself in a heap of trouble with three hapless misfits to guide, an evil witch at her heels and no way to get home.] Virginia Theatre 1pm, $3 “Meet Me In St. Louis” (1944) [The well-off Smith family has four beautiful daughters. Seventeen-year-old Esther has fallen in love with John, who has just moved in next door. The family is shocked when Mr. Smith reveals that he has been transferred to a job in New York, which means that the family has to leave St. Louis and the 1904 St. Louis fair.] Virginia Theatre, 7pm, $3 Recreation “Allerton Legacy” Exhibit Allerton Park 9am Meetings Illini Folk Dance Society Illini Union 8pm Miscellaneous Altgeld Chime-Tower Tours Altgeld Hall 12:30pm WCIA Home and Garden Show [This year’s event will host more than 140 exhibitors showcasing home improvement and landscaping products, pools and hot tubs, sunrooms, painting tools, pest control, windows, cabinets, lawn care and more. There will be a variety of howto seminars taught by professionals.] Assembly Hall, 9am

sounds from the scene

Catfish Jenkins The Fake Fictions MANS The Record Low

ART & THEATER

Canopy Club, March 25, 9 p.m. $1

State of the Art 2007 [Renowned watercolor artists from across the country will display their unique creations during the 10th Biennial Watercolor Invitational at the Parkland Art Gallery.] Parkland Art Gallery through March 28 Collected [Features art of various media from around the world that examines the creation and production of history and culture through the process of collecting.] OPENSOURCE Art through March 31 Paintings by Lucy Synk [The work of local painter Lucy Synk is featured in this show which includes recent original pieces alongside framed prints of her past work.] Pages For All Ages through March 31 Visual Dialogue [A show of recent paintings by St. Louis artists Grace Lin, James Wu and Yingxue Zuo.] Cinema Gallery through April 7 Watercolors from D17 [Group exhibition of watercolors by Ann Rund, Gayle Tilford, Barb Johanek, Melissa Lynch, Martha Seif, Cindy Carlson, Barbara Ryan and Ann McDowell.] Heartland Gallery through April 7 Commerce and Consumption: Works From The Permanent Collection [Photographic works from the museum’s permanent collection that are defined by marketing and advertising actions have been selected for this exhibition, an accompaniment to “Branded and On Display.”] Krannert Art Museum and Kinkead Pavillion through May 13 Branded and On Display [Features the work of artists exploring the theme of branding and the significance of marketing in our culture. Representing a range of media — sculpture, video, installation, sound, painting and photography, the works are compelling and provocative, nudging us to “re-view” our culture with an appraising eye.] Krannert Art Museum and Kinkead Pavilion through April 1

After returning from spring break, why not extend the holiday with a funkadellic jam band that holds the laid-back, sipping-on-a-frosty-drink-while-sitting-on-the-beach sentiment this Sunday? A merge of David Bowie, Jimmy Buffet, Talking Heads and a slight taste of Prince on guitar and Jeff Tweedy on vocals, the Chicago band Catfish Jenkins is the gel that sticks funk and rock together. Each song has a catchy hook that results in the snapping-fingers/bobbing-head syndrome. In particular, the song,“Careful What You Wish For” emulates the Buffet charm of “Margaritaville” while still containing a more alternative rock twist. Another song, “Lemonade and Wine,” takes mellow guitar and mixes it with funk as the back beat. Remember that gel I mentioned? Well, this is it.

Symagery [An exhibition by Melissa Pokorny, Assistant Professor, School of Art and Design. Using a variety of materials, Pokorny’s work investigates the collision of public and private space, architecture and the built environment, mediated nature and the real and imagined contingencies suggested by these forced conversations.] Humanities Lecture Hall, IPRH, through May 11 A History of New [Explores what happens when a new technology is co-opted and subverted into a tool, supporting system or display medium for artists. University students and museum visitors are invited to help build a graphically rich timeline of technological and scientific innovations, and the resulting reactions and responses to these innovations. The timeline will be displayed on the wall of the CANVAS Gallery and within the CANVAS itself.] Krannert Art Museum through July 29 Why Knot? [For 20,000 years, humans have manipulated fibers to construct objects that aid in food gathering, commemorating the dead and protecting and beautifying the body and home. The Spurlock Museum celebrates these artifacts and the skilled craftspeople who create them.] Spurlock Museum beginning March 27 through August 26

After spending too much over break, the cost of only $1 for some high-quality music is hard to resist. Come kick back at the Canopy and just go with the flow. —Caitlin Cremer

SUN. MAR 25 Live Bands 7 to 9 Sundays featuring Small Town, Adam Wolfe and Pulsar47 Iron Post 7pm, $3.50 Crystal River Rose Bowl Tavern, 9pm no cover New Sound Sundays featuring The Fake Fictions, MANS, The Record Low and Catfish Jenkins Canopy Club, 9pm, $1 Swellets, Frank Must Go and Oceans Iron Post, 9pm, $5 DJ DJ/Gentlemen’s Club Silver Bullet Bar, 8pm Dancing Salsa Sundays featuring DJ Bris [Beginning with free dance lessons then letting the floor to open dancing.] Cowboy Monkey, 7pm, no cover Lectures/Discussions Thriller Talk: A Mystery Book Club [Share your sleuths at Thriller Talk,

sounds from the scene

a mystery book club! Read the book selected for the month or read another by the same author. You are summoned to appear and give testimony on the plot and people in “Loves Music, Loves to Dance” by Mary Higgins Clark.] Urbana Free Library, 2pm Recreation Sunday Morning Bird Walks in Busey Woods [Join the Champaign County Audubon Society members on a trip.] Anita Purves Nature Center 7:30am “Allerton Legacy” Exhibit Allerton Park 9am Women Only Swim Kenney Gym 5:30pm Tae Kwon Do [Learn martial arts. No previous experience is required.]

Meetings University Falun Dafa Practice Group Illini Union, 4:10pm

MON. MAR 26 Live Bands Open Mic Night with Brandon T. Washington and Mike Ingram Cowboy Monkey, 10pm WEFT Sessions featuring Lucky Mulholland WEFT 90.1 FM, 10pm DJ DJ/Gentlemen’s Club Silver Bullet Bar, 8pm

Campus Recreation (CRCE), 9pm

Lectures/Discussions Free English Speaking, Listening Class Parkland College, 9am “Historical Materials and Research on Premodern Japan” [A lecture by Ishigami Eichi.] Foreign Languages Building, 1pm

Miscellaneous Altgeld Chime-Tower Tours Altgeld Hall 12:30pm

“Bones of Contention: The Making and Meaning of a National Hero”

[This lecture by Maria Todorova focuses on the activities, death and posthumous fate of Bulgaria’s national hero Vasil Levski (1835-73) and provides a singular view into the mechanism of hero worship.] Alice Campbell Alumni Center, 7:30pm “Nanoparticles For Targeted Cancer Therapy” [A lecture by Jianjun Cheng, Ph.D.] Small Animal Clinic, 12pm Workshops Resume Critique La Casa Cultural Latina, 3pm, free Recreation “Allerton Legacy” Exhibit Allerton Park, 9am Miscellaneous Altgeld Chime-Tower Tours Altgeld Hall 12:30pm Meetings UIUC Senate Meeting Levis Faculty Center, 3pm Italian Table [Italian conversation.]

Krannert Center for the Performing Arts, 12pm Mind/Body/Spirit WCIA Home and Garden Show Assembly Hall, 11am

TUE. MAR 27 Live Bands Billy Galt Sings the Blues Blues restaurant, 11:30am Mae with Special Guests The Hush Sound, Sherwood Canopy Club, 7pm, $15 in advance Crystal River Rose Bowl Tavern, 9pm no cover Rehearsal Space in the Void Room [With Jason Finkleman’s Nu-Orbit Ensemble.] Canopy Club, 9pm, no cover Murder by Death with Reverend Horton Heat [In support of MbD’s latest album “In Bocca Al Lupo” that Outburn Magazine called “flawless, tragic and beautiful.”] Highdive, 9pm, $20

INTRO | A ROUND TOWN | L ISTEN, HEAR | THE HOOPLA | STAGE, S CREEN &

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DJ DJ/Gentlemen’s Club Silver Bullet Bar 8pm Subversion featuring DJ Nhyrvana & DJ Vermis Cowboy Monkey, 10pm, $2 Chris O [A blend of downtempo and deep house.] Boltini Lounge 10:30pm, no cover Karaoke Liquid Courage Karaoke Geo’s, 9pm Karaoke with Randy Miller Bentley’s Pub, 9:30pm, free Lectures/Discussions Free English Speaking, Listening Class Parkland College, 9am Ninth Letter: A Unique Literary Arts Magazine [Ninth Letter is the awardwinning literary/arts journal published by the U of I’s creative writing program in collaboration with the School of Art & Design. Editor Jodee Stanley and Art Director Jennifer Gunji-Ballsrud will talk about the history and mission of the publication and its affiliated web site, as well EDS

| THE STINGER | CU CALENDAR

as its pedagogical impact on both programs involved in its production.] University YMCA, 12pm “Between Ramallah and Tel Aviv: Gay Palestinians and the Politics and Performance of Race and Sexuality in Israel-Palestine” [Jason Ritchie, Anthropology and PSAMES FLAS Fellow, will be speaking.] Foreign Languages Building, 12pm “Historical Materials on Ancient Japan: The Shosoin Monjo Collection and Todaiji Temple in the 8th Century” [With speaker Ishigami Eichi, Tokyo University Historiographical Institute.] Foreign Languages Building, 2pm “More Black Men in Prison Than In College: Why It’s Everyone’s Problem” [This panel will address the urgent and devastating problem of racial disparities in incarceration. Speakers will present the issues of racial profiling, the prison-industrial complex and the plight of people of color, especially in Illinois. Will close with a spoken word performance from student George Ploss.] Pennsylvania Avenue Residence Hall, 7pm “The Memory of the Holocaust and the Arab-Israeli Conflict” Levis Faculty Center, 7:30pm, free

Why Knot?

Whether it be knitting a sweater or using a net to catch some delicious fish, we’ve all been exposed to the world of interlocking fiber. Beginning March 27, the Spurlock Museum will explore the 20,000-year history of manipulating fiber through its new exhibit, “Why Knot?” The exhibit features four main areas: “Tools and Techniques,” which explains the tools and processes needed to work fiber; “Reveal and Conceal, a discussion on how fiberworking can create clothing that both covers the body and reveals its form; “Boatswains and Bobbins,” which focuses on the role of worked fibers in maritime professions such as fishing and sailing and “Details and Decorations,” which features intricate objects meant to be viewed in a detailed manner.

Sporting Events Illinois Baseball vs. Indiana Illinois Field, 6pm Workshops The Job Search in Consulting [This workshop will discuss job search strategies in consulting for graduate students. It will provide information about how to begin and organize the job search, what strategies are most effective, how to research organizations and where to find other helpful resources.] Illini Union, 3pm Recreation “Allerton Legacy” Exhibit Allerton Park 9am Miscellaneous Altgeld Chime-Tower Tours Altgeld Hall 12:30pm Meetings Book Discussion Group [This month’s book is “Lighting the Way: Nine Women Who Changed Modern America” by Karenna Gore Schiff.] Amy Kummerow, 1805 Pleasant St., Urbana, 2:30pm Illini Folk Dance Society Illini Union, 8pm Fundraisers “Find A Cure Fiesta” [Sigma Kappa sorority’s annual fundraiser for Alzheimer’s research. All you can eat taco bar, nachos and refreshments.] Sigma Kappa House, 4pm, $4/$5 at the door Family Fun Babies’ Lap Time [Babies and their parents or caregivers are invited to this program of songs, stories and rhymes for young patrons, ages birth to 24 months.] Urbana Free Library, 9:45am Soap Science [Experiment with soap and try to make the biggest bubble ever.] Anita Purves Nature Center, 1pm

WED. MAR 28 Live Bands Lunchtime Acoustic Series featuring Ryan Groff (of elsinore) Courtyard Cafe 12pm Irish Traditional Music Session Bentley’s Pub, 7pm Feudin’ Hillbilly’s Rose Bowl Tavern 9pm, no cover We the Living, Doug Robinson and the Reason Why, Pinko Canopy Club, 9pm $5/$7 after 10pm

College is OVER.

Spurlock Museum beginning March 27 through Aug. 26

In addition, visitors will have the opportunity to feel a variety of fibers and even try their own hand at knitting, crocheting and braiding. —Bonnie Stiernberg

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616 E. Green • Champaign Workshops “Preparing for a Job Fair” Career Center, 8am

DJ DJ/Gentlemen’s Club Silver Bullet Bar 8pm DJ Stifler [Country until 11pm and then hip-hop and dance music.] Highdive, 8pm, $3/$5 after 10pm

Recreation “Allerton Legacy” Exhibit Allerton Park 9am

Dancing Tango Dancing featuring Joe Grohens Cowboy Monkey, 7:30pm, no cover

Miscellaneous 2007 East Central Illinois Business Expo [The Champaign County Chamber of Commerce proudly presents this third annual event featuring the products and services of over 100 businesses from across the region. The event is open to the public and admission and parking are free.] Assembly Hall, 10am, free Altgeld Chime-Tower Tours Altgeld Hall 12:30pm

Karaoke Liquid Courage Karaoke Geovanti’s 10pm Lectures/Discussions Free English Speaking, Listening Class Parkland College, 9am “Choice of Routes in Congested Traffic Networks: Experimental Tests of the Braess Paradox” [With Amnon Rapoport, University of Arizona.] National Center for Supercomputing Applications Building, 2pm “Bring Them To Justice: Putting Faith Into Action” [Rev. Bayer will speak at a community event on the topics of religious compassion and justice, the role of progressive religion in addressing social concerns like war in Iraq and how to put faith into action. A discussion will follow.] Illinois Disciples Foundation, 7pm “Technical Visionaries: Engineering Insights into Creativity and Innovation” [Raymond Price will lecture.] Everitt Laboratory, 12pm “African Studies: Perspectives from Veterinary Biosciences” International Studies Building, 12pm, free The No. 44 Society Book Collectors’ Club [Special lecture by David Gilner.] Main Library, 3pm

Meetings Deutshe Konversationsgruppe [German conversation group.] Bread Company, 706 S. Goodwin Ave. Urbana, 1pm Scandinavian Coffee Hour Bread Company, 4pm Illinites Meetings [Looking for leadership opportunities and experience, or just like to program? Look no further than the Illinites committee.] Illini Union, 6pm Book Discussion Group Pages for All Ages, 7pm Family Fun “Toddler Time: Transportation” [Children, ages two through four, with an adult, are invited to listen to stories and sing songs about all kinds of vehicles.] Urbana Free Library, 10:30am “Babies’ Lap Time Moonlight Edition” [Parents with their babies are invited to come listen to songs, stories and rhymes.] Urbana Free Library, 6:30pm

Film “My Life as a Dog” Temple Hoyne Buell Hall, 7:30pm, free

INTRO | A ROUND TOWN | L ISTEN, HEAR | THE HOOPLA | STAGE, S CREEN &

B ETWEEN | CLASSI

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| THE STINGER | CU CALENDAR

sounds from the scene