Buzz Magazine: May 26, 2005

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Historic Lincoln Hotel 384-8800

Breakfast - Lunch - Dinner 128 Luxury rooms with a European touch. Indoor swimming pool & hot tub.

Alumni Tap: $1.50 Drafts Miller/Bud Light EVERY DAY

Come To The New Balance Store Š 2003 New Balance Shoe, Inc.

209 S. Broadway Urbaana IL

New Balance Urbana

Full Line of NB Shoes & Apparel N is for fit, not fashion. N is for technology, not gimmickry. N is for sticking to your principles. Real shoes engineered for real athletes. In multiple widths, not just multiple sizes. N is for New Balance. Find the perfect fit at New Balance Urbana.

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16 O5 | 26 | O5 . O6 | 1 | O5 champaign . urbana

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buzz weekly

MA Y 26

BEAUTY IS IN THE EYE OF THE BEER HOLDER.

EDITOR’S NOTE PAUL WAGNER • EDITOR IN CHIEF

The thing I miss most about

living at home with my parents is the food. I LOVE food.

Love it. Especially free food. It doesn’t even have to be especially good; if it’s free, I’ll eat it.And food that I don’t have to cook, that’s always good, too.

My parents still insist on eating dinner as a family every night, and I used to think this was silly, what with my sister and I being so involved in sports that dinner could be pushed back to 9 or 10 in the evening. But we always ate together. Full meals, too, and we rarely ate out.The best days were when my dad would barbeque.The man is amazing with a grill. Every weekend we’d have a BBQ at least once, and everyone would be invited.We’re a social family and love company, so friends would always come and mooch off the great free food.

Living in the dorms made me miss the quality of the home-cooked meals; even the bad ones seemed gourmet next to some of the crap they try to feed students in the dorms. But I lived on dorm food for two years, and I turned out OK. Whenever I went home, though, I’d request big, delicious meals because I knew I could get some quality food in me.

But dorm food was prepared for me. My friends and I would head to the dining hall every day around 5:30, grab our food from the buffet style setup, sit at our usual table and eat no longer than 10 minutes after we got there (except for Fat Don’s.We waited a long-ass time for that, and it was worth it).

Nowadays, when I want to eat, I have to pick out and actually cook my own food.

This process can take a long freakin’ time!

And there’s always the dishes. Constantly dishes. So what usually happens is I order out, or I cook food from a box.And no, this food is not that good, nor is it that good for me, but, dammit, it’s quick and easy. Now when I go home, I don’t even care what I eat as long as it’s home-cooked and decent, because it’s WAY better than what I eat on my own. I mean, a boy can only live on Mac ‘n’ Cheese and sandwiches for so long.

- Paul

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J U N . 1 , 2 OO5

BUZZ STAFF v o l u m e

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MA Y 26

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APARTMENTS n o . 2 1

Cover Design • Brittany Bindrim Editor in chief • Paul Wagner Art Director • Claire Napier Copy Chief • Erin Green, Nellie Waddell Music • Kyle Gorman Arts • Katie Richardson Film • Andrew Vecelas Community • Erin Scottberg Calendar • Erin Scottberg Photography Editor • David Solana Designers • Brittany Bindrim, Nikita Sorokin Calendar Coordinators • Cassie Conner Photography • Sarah Krohn, Adriana D’Onofrio, Austin Happel Copy Editors • Erin Green, Nellie Waddell Staff Writers • Frank Krolicki, Cornelia Boonman, Todd J. Hunter, Susan Schomberg, Katie Richardson, David Ruthenberg, Randy Ma, Paul Prikazky, David Just, Shadie Elnashai, Alan Bannister Contributing Writers • Michael Coulter, Seth Fein, Logan Moore, Jeff Nelson Production Manager • Meredith Niepert Sales Manager • Anna Rost Marketing/Distribution • Louis Reeves III Publisher • Mary Cory

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APARTMENTS

Furnished

Furnished

NEAR ENGINEERING CAMPUS

FOR YOUR MONEY!

8/18/05. $340-$370 month Weiner Co. 384-8018 www.weinercompanies.com

$595-$630

2 Bedroom Apts Beckman/Engineering Campus

JOHN STREET APARTMENTS

• dishwasher • furnished • spacious • off-street parking • air conditioned • ethernet access

58 E. John August 2005. Two and three bedrooms, fully furnished. Dishwashers, center courtyard, on-site laundry, central air, ethernet available.

THE UNIVERSITY GROUP www.ugroup96.com 352-3182 Showings Monday-Friday 10-5 Saturday 11-4

307- 309 Healey Court.

Fall 2005. Behind Gully’s. 2 bedrooms. Ethernet available. Office at 309 S. First, C. THE UNIVERSITY GROUP www.ugroup96.com 352-3182 Spacious, sunny Victorian. 1 bedroom & study. Available August.

Year lease. Hardwood floors, laundry, parking. 217-621-6067 Walk one block Krannert, quad.

Great two bedroom, parking, laundry, on bus line. August. 390-6535 or 398-6677.

Unfurnished

New Building “Lofts on John” One bedroom, unfurnished, W/D, dishwasher, opening August 05 $650/mo. Near John and 2nd. Call 356-1407

430

PARK-LIKE SETTING Unf. 2 BR avail. 8/18/05, A/C, laundry, 101 W. Park, Urbana. $500/month.

Weiner Co. 384-8018 www.weinercompanies.com

304 W. Elm, U 2 BR or 1BR w/Study Between campus & Strawberry Fields. parking, A/C, $495/mo.

at 402 East High, Urbana. Close to campus, Lincoln Square, and downtown Urbana.

Available August 1.

Rent $415/month.

352-4918

705 S. RANDOLPH, C 2 BR, Available early June. Near campus and Downtown Champaign. $510/ mo. 352-8540 www.faronproperties.com

Avail. Fall. $465- $475/mo.

Includes most utilities, laundry, pkg, A/C. On busline.

The Weiner Companies, Ltd 384-8018 www.weinercompanies.com

Convenient 1 bedrooms near downtown Champaign now available.

From $390.

508 W. Hill, C. 511 W. University, C. 515 W. Washington, C. These and other apartment locations also available for leases starting throughout the summer. 352-8540, p.m. 355-4608 www.faronproperties.com

e-mail:

buzz@readbuzz.com write:

57 E. Green St. Champaign, IL 61820

48 E. John, C.

call:

52 E. Armory, C.

1, 2

57 E. John, C.

1, 2

217.337.3801 We reserve the right to edit submissions. Buzz will not publish a letter without the verbal consent of the writer prior to publication date.

First copy of Buzz is FREE, each additional copy is $.50

© Illini Media Company 2005

4

103 E. Chalmers, C.

2

105 S. Wright, C.

4

106, 107, 108 E. Healey, C. 107 E. Springfield (new gym), C.

1, 2 1, 2, 3

106 S. Gregory, U.

4

108 N. Busey, U.

2 (house)

306-510 E. Michigan, U.

1, 2, 3

401 W. Springfield, U.

4

402 N. Gregory, U.

2

406 Elm/201 Grove, U.

1

502, 504 W. Elm, U.

Studio, 1

506 W. Elm, U.

1, 2

301 E. Clark, C.

1, 2

404 E. Clark, C.

3

405 E. Stoughton, C.

3

503 E. Stoughton, C.

3

507 S. Fourth, C.

2

510 E. White, C.

2

1010 W. Stoughton (new), U.

608 E. White, C.

3

1102 E. Colorado, U.

903, 909 S. Locust

4

1301 Harding/1302 Brighton (new), U.

1106 S. Euclid, C.

2

1806 Cottage Grove (new), U.

2302 W. John (brand new), C.

1, 2 1, 2

804 W. Illinois, U.

3

809, 813 W. Springfield, U.

2, 3, 4

809 W. Stoughton, U.

2

812 W. Nevada, U.

2

905, 907 W. Oregon, U. 1009 W. Stoughton, U.

2, 3 Studio, 2, 4

2008 S. Vawter, U.

303 E. Green, Champaign www.cpm-apts.com cpm@cpm-apts.com Office Hours: Mon-Thurs: 9-6, Fri: 9-5, Sat: 11-3 s o u n d s

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STATELY BUILDING LARGE 2 BEDROOM 2 BR plus sunroom Avail. Fall 2005 hwd floors, laundry, parking $900/month includes heat, water & trash

hdwd floors, A/C, pkg, w/d hookups $515/month

The Weiner Companies, Ltd.

603 West Green, U The Weiner Companies,Ltd 384-8018 www.weinercompanies.com

SUBLETS

2, 3 2, 3, 4 1 2, 3 2, 3, 4

440

1 BR. Available Now. Parking included. 6th & Stoughton. $400/mo plus utilities. 630-205-4889 AVAILABLE NOW 1 BR loft apartment. Champaign. $380/mo. 773-821-0192.

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Other Rentals 500

Things to Do 700

HOUSES

Announcements800

510

2 bedroom and 7 bedroom house on campus for Fall 2005. 367-6626.

2 BR house. Quiet Champaign location. Lots of amenities. $645/mo.

217-637-0806.

506 W. Springfield August ‘05. 6 bedroom, 2.5 bath furnished home. Huge, beautiful, hardwood, parking. Ted 766-5108.

617 W. CHURCH Beautiful 6 BR 3 Bath furnished home. Hardwood floors, two porches, off-street parking and more. Only $2100/mo. 369-0500.

Eight to Nine Bedroom Fall, Campus, $2850 367-6626 FREE IPOD SHUFFLE TO EACH TENANT! 2 houses. 3 1/2 blocks from quad.

606 & 608 E. Stoughton. 8 bedroom, 3 bath. Available June 1, 2005. $2000/mo, $2000/mo. plus utilities.

Free parking. (630)205-4889.

LOST & FOUND

810

Lost 1/10th size violin one block west of the Music Building, reward $100. Call 586-7200.

read buzz then RECYCLE

Residential Area & Close to Campus 3 BR w/garage, bsmt

SUBLETS

450

Summer Only

Campus Property Management 328-3030 • www.cpm-apts.com

SUBLETS

460

Summer with Fall Option Beginning of June. Spacious 2 bedroom, 1.5 bath, two balconies. Near campus. Accessible bus stop. $624/mo. Reasonable utility bills.

Opportunity to renew lease. 217621-2970.

Fantastic Sublet Waiting For You! Lease is for summer and next school year up through next Aug. Great location by Hessel park, on bus line. Spacious, well lit 1 bedroom. Laundry room, $465 a month.

Free Parking off street.

Free Water.

Free Garbage/ sewer.

Call 390-6339

384-8018 www.weinercompanies.com

large backyard, porches, laundry, hdwd floors

Furn $1,150/month or Unfurn $1,000/month

The Weiner Companies, Ltd.

1, 2, 3 & 4 BRS GREAT LOCATIONS GREAT PRICES

2, 3

212 E. White, C

105 N. Busey, U

2 BR DUPLEX IN URBANA

430

Unfurnished

Apartment in house

Large 1 BR

TALK TO BUZZ

APARTMENTS

The Weiner Companies,Ltd. 384-8018 www.weinercompanies.com

NEED A 1 BR!

Buzz magazine is a student-run publication of Illini Media Company and does not necessarily represent, in whole or in part, the views of the University of Illinois administration, faculty or students.

I N T R O | A R O U N D T O W N | L I S T E N , H E A R | M A I N E V E N T | A R T S & E N T E R TA I N M E N T | T H E S I LV E R S C R E E N | T H E S T I N G E R | C L A S S I F I E D S

430

APARTMENTS

493-8487

510 S. Elm Available Fall 2005. 2 BR close to campus, hardwood floors, dishwasher, W/D, central air/heat, off street parking, 24 hr. maintenance. $525/mo. 841-1996.

THE UNIVERSITY GROUP www.ugroup96.com 352-3182

APARTMENTS Unfurnished

HEALEY COURT APARTMENTS

Corner of Clark & Gregory

OLD TOWN CHAMPAIGN

420

APARTMENTS Furnished

MORE

Furnished efficiency at

503 E. Clark, C., avail.

buzz weekly •

THERE'S A SHORTAGE OF PERFECT BREASTS IN THIS WORLD. IT WOULD BE A PITY TO DAMAGE YOURS.

384-8018 www.weinercompanies.com

ROOMS

530

Room in huge male/female student house near West Side Park and downtown Champaign. $520 per monthly includes utilities, trash, long distance telephone, cable, Ethernet, free Washer/Dryer, private off-street parking, use of large living areas.

Lease & deposit required. Available August 2005. 217-355-2326.

ROOM & BOARD

540

Want community?

Vegetarian meals? Affordable private rooms? www.couch.coop

ROOMMATE WANTED 550 1 bedroom, near campus $300 per month 367-6626 AVAILABLE NOW AND FOR FALL Share beautiful furnished 3 bedroom apartment at Third and Clark. From $225. Ted 766-5108 Female Roommate Wanted 2 BR in Champaign, condo, airconditioning,cable,fireplace, washer/dryer, balcony/patio, furnished, telephone hook-up, garage, 2 bus routes. $425/mo. 217-721-5027 or 217-373-7978. rnhrdttl@uiuc.edu.

Fall 2005

Location

Bedrooms

102 E. Gregory, C 202 E. John, C 610 E. Stoughton, C 910 & 910.5 S. Locust, C 807 W. Oregon, U 810 W. Iowa, U 811 W. Oregon, U

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, & 6 1, 2, 3 2, 3, 4 1, 2 3 2 4

359-0700 • www.GabesPlace.com

Roommate wanted. 1 or 2. Male or Female. Nice house in country. $325 includes everything. 217-840-2257.

PARKING/STORAGE

570

Rent storage for the summer. Student special. Own your own storage. 384-5302

RealEstateforSale 600 CONDOS/DUPLEXES

Thou that placeth an ad upon this page will best thee rival ineth a duel.

620

3 bedroom 2.3 bath, lofted condo in Colony West. W/D. C/A, swimming pool, tennis courts, lots of parking. $895 637-0806

I N T R O | A R O U N D T O W N | L I S T E N , H E A R | M A I N E V E N T | A R T S & E N T E R TA I N M E N T | W I N E & D I N E | T H E S I LV E R S C R E E N | C L A S S I F I E D S

PHONE: 217/337-8337 • DEADLINE: 2 p.m. Tuesday for the next edition.

Services

100

INDEX 000 100 200 300 400 500 600 700 800 900

• PLEASE CHECK YOUR AD! Report errors immediately by calling 337-8337. We cannot be responsible for more than one day’s incorrect insertion if you do not notify us of the error by 2 pm on the day of the first insertion.

• All advertising is subject to the approval of the publisher. The Daily Illini shall have the right to revise, reject or cancel, in whole or in part, any advertisement, at any time.

• All employment advertising in this newspaper is subject to the City of Champaign Human Rights Ordinance and similar state and local laws, making it illegal for any person to cause to be published any advertisement which expresses limitation, specification or discrimination as to race, color, mental handicap, personal appearance, sexual orientation, family responsibilities, political affiliation, prior arrest or conviction record, source of income, or the fact that such person is a student.

• Specification in employment classifications are made only where such factors are bonafide occupational qualifications necessary for employment.

• All real estate advertising in this newspaper is subject to the Federal Fair Housing Act of 1968, and similar state and local laws which make it illegal for any person to cause to be published any advertisement relating to the transfer, sale, rental, or lease of any housing which expresses limitation, specifications or discrimination as to race, color, creed, class, national origin, religion, sex, age, marital status, physical or mental handicap, personal appearance, sexual oientation, family responsibilities, political affiliation, or the fact that such person is a student.

• This newspaper will not knowingly accept any advertising for real estate that is in violation of the law. Our readers are informed that all dwellings advertised in this newspaper are available on an equal oppportunity basis.

DEADLINE:

2 p.m. Monday for the next Thursday’s edition.

RATES: Billed rate: 35¢/word Paid-in-Advance: 28¢/word Photo Sellers 30 words or less + photo: $5 per issue Garage Sales 30 words in both Thursday’s buzz and Friday’s Daily Illini!! $10. If it rains, your next date is free.

Action Ads • 20 words, run any 5 days (in buzz or The Daily Illini), $14 • 10 words, run any 5 days (in buzz or The Daily Illini), $7 • add a photo to an action ad, $10

Employment 000 HELP WANTED

020

Part Time ATTENTION STUDENTS $9 per hour to start.

Earn up to $15 per hour.

No Experience required 25 positions available Full time/ part time 1-800-809-8775

030

HELP WANTED Full/Part Time

Camp Counselors- Gain valuable expreience while having the summer of a lifetime. Counelors needed for Outdoor Adventure, Arts, Aquatics, and more in the Pocono Mountains of Pennsylvania. Apply online at www.pineforestcamp.com

Help wanted for apartment inspections in August. Apply at: Campus Property Management 303 E. Green 328-3030.

BUSINESS SERVICES

110

Mentor and critic for literary and visual arts. $25/hr. 217-417-0233

$8.25/HR. STARTING Office and Warehouse Associate.

Flexible hours, Meyer Drapery 330 N. Neil. Downtown Champaign. Apply in person or send resume. 3525318.

Earn $5000 as an egg donor. Must be 20-29 and a non-smoker. Please call Alternative Reproductive Resources at 773-327-7315 or 847446-1001 to learn how you can help a family fulfill its dreams.

Merchandise 200 FOR SALE

285

Transportation 300 310

www.lookatusedcars.com

Apartments

400

Property Management

Fall 2005 Apartments • Efficiencies 1103 S. Euclid 312 E. White • 1 Bedrooms 508 S. First 108 W. Charles 310 E. Clark 106 E. Armory 312 E. White 105 S. Fourth 104 E. John 103 E. Stoughton 103 E. Healey 108 1/2 E. Daniel 507 S. Elm, C Call for an appointment

351-1767

www.johnsonrentals.com rentals@johnsonrentals.com

APARTMENTS

• 2 Bedrooms 308 E. Armory 1103 S. Euclid 312 E. White 104 E. John 103 E. Stoughton 105 S. Fourth 210/208 E. White 312 E. White • 3 Bedrooms 1103 S. Euclid 807 S. Locust 210/208 E. White 312 E. White 104 E. John • 4 Bedrooms 807 S. Locust 210/208 E. White

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Furnished/Unfurnished 1 bedroom lofts $497 2 bedrooms $545 3 bedrooms $650 4 bedrooms $1000 Campus, parking.

Fall 04, 367-6626

713 S. Randolph,C. Now renting for Fall.

Spacious, 2 & 3 bedrooms from $618.

Near campus, downtown Champaign. Includes cable, parking, water. Has laundry facilities and seasonal pool.

Quality apartments and houses for rent

APARTMENTS

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BEST VALUE 1 BR. loft from $480.

1 Br. $370 2 BR. $470 3 BR. $750 4 BR $755 Campus. 367-6626.

1 Bedroom

1, 2, 3, 4 bedroom apartments Available now Gabe’s Place 359-0700 www.GabesPlace.com

Quiet Luxury Apartments New Security Building

Beckman View Apts.

Efficiencies. Available now and Fall 2005. Secured building. Private parking. Laundry on site, ethernet available. Office at 309 S. First, Ch. THE UNIVERSITY GROUP www.ugroup96.com 352-3182

1006 S. 3RD, C.

Aug 2005. 1 bedroom. Location, location. Covered parking & laundry, furnished & patios, ethernet available. Office at 309 S. First, Ch. THE UNIVERSITY GROUP www.ugroup96.com 352-3182

105 E. John

NO BULL!

Free Best Buy and Campus Tan gift certificate with each signed lease!

Remodeled apartments that redefine campus living.

3 and 4 bedroom apartments available at 810 S. Oak St. between John and Daniel in Champaign.

3 bedroom apartment at $999/mo. (only $333 per roommate!)

4 bedroom apartment at $999/mo. (less than $250 per roommate!)

High-speed internet, water, and trash included!

Laundry in building.

Available Fall 2005. 1& 2 bedroom furnished, great location. Includes parking.

THE UNIVERSITY GROUP www.ugroup96.com 352-3182 207 Wright Engineering Very Large, New 1 Bedroom apt.

Free parking. www.ugroup96.com 352-3182 or (217)841-3028

304 & 306 E. Clark, C Castle Apartments

217-384-6930

3 blocks to Engineering Quad. 3 BR $670, 4 BR $890. C/A, ceiling fan, dishwasher, washer/dryer in unit.

384-1099, castle_apartments@ameritech.net

DI CLASSIFIEDS

307 & 310 E. White 307 & 309 Clark

NINE MONTH LEASES NEGOTIABLE www.johnsmithproperties.com

Unlocking the door to your perfect apartment.

420

Furnished

1005 S. SECOND, C

Don’t get stuck with only those highpriced apartments left for Fall. Wellmaintained 2- bedroom furnished apartments near Beckman and Engineering. Dishwasher, AC, ethernet and off-street parking available. $595- $630/mo. 493-8487

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APARTMENTS

Furnished

Available Now. 2 bedroom on campus. $550 per month. 367-6626.

COURTYARD ON RANDOLPH

217-352-8540 217-355-4608 (evenings) www.faronproperties.com

• Many pet-friendly locations • Furnished AND Unfurnished units • 9 month leases negotiable at some locations

410

LIKE NEW! DJ Equipment for Sale.

Pioneer, Denon, Vestax Mixers. Denon CD Players. Vestax PDX 2000.

Alesis Air FX. Coffins and heavy duty Cases. 217-344-3751. http://mamboitaliano.us/4sale/

AUTOMOBILES

Johnson Rentals

APARTMENTS Furnished/Unfurnished

Summer Jobs

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605 E. Clark St., C. Furnished, washer/dryer, A/C, balcony, dishwasher, intercom, ethernet, microwave, covered parking. www.mhmproperties.com 337-8852

Fall 2005. Large studio, double closet, well furnished. Secured building. $320/month. Available June 1 and August ‘05.

THE UNIVERSITY GROUP www.ugroup96.com 352-3182 or 841-3028

I N T R O | A R O U N D T O W N | L I S T E N , H E A R | M A I N E V E N T | A R T S & E N T E R TA I N M E N T | T H E S I LV E R S C R E E N | T H E S T I N G E R | C L A S S I F I E D S

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509 E. White, C.

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6 7 8

Aug. 2005. Large 1 bedrooms. Security entry, balconies, patios, furnished. Laundry, off-street parking, ethernet available. Office at 309 S. First, Ch. THE UNIVERSITY GROUP www.ugroup96.com 352-3182

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604 E. White, C. Security Entrance For Fall 2005, Large 1 bedroom furnished, balconies, patios, laundry, off-street parking, ethernet available.

Phone 352-3182. Office at 309 S. First, C. THE UNIVERSITY GROUP www.ugroup96.com

Unique 1 & 2 bedroom apartments.

All furnished, laundry, internet, and parking available. Must see!!

THE UNIVERSITY GROUP www.ugroup96.com 352-3182

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705 W. Main, U

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Newer 2 BR $690/mo 1 block from Lincoln Laundry, free parking, A/C The Weiner Companies, Ltd.

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384-8018

602 E. Stoughton

CALL US AT (217) 384-6930 VIEW OUR LISTINGS @ www.johnsmithproperties.com

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Security Building

• On-campus or off-campus • Excellent Tenant Union record • Weekend/evening showings by appointment

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506 E. Stoughton, C

1 and 2 Bedroom Apartments

502 E. University, C. Quiet Building. Huge bedrooms, AC, furnished, parking, Aug. 05.

369-0237. www.zhengrentals.com

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For August 2005. Extra large efficiency apartments. Security building entry, complete furniture, laundry, off-street parking, ethernet available.

Office at 309 S. First, Champaign.

THE UNIVERSITY GROUP www.ugroup96.com 352-3182

BECKMAN APTS.

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6 0 1 -6 0 3 E . C la rk, C .

F u rn ish e d 1 B R w /b a lco n y, la u n d ry, so m e fre e u til.

2 m in . fro m th e U n io n .

S ta rtin g a t $ 3 8 5 .

344-1306 or 352-4104

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DELUXE 2 BR

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309 N. Busey, U. August of 2005. Fully furnished, W/D, ethernet and parking available.

Close to Beckman. $595/mo. Call Chris anytime, 841-1996 or 403-1523

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| 21 | Located just two blocks from the University of Illinois • Easy walking distance to Krannert Center, Engineering Campus, and the Illini Union.

• Also right on the MTD Green Line for easy bus access.

Each Unit Features • Washer/Dryer • Furnished • Broadband Internet • Balcony or Patio • Granite Countertops • and Much More!!!

• Dishwasher

Prices start at only $995 per month

s o u n d s

3

uNDER c OVER

Now & Fall 2005 2 and 3 bedrooms. Furnished with internet. Parking and laundry available. On-site resident manager. Call Kenny, 493-0429.

THE UNIVERSITY GROUP www.ugroup96.com 352-3182

502 W. Green 4 bedroom. 2 bath. Fireplace, W/D, A/C. $1160/mo. 217-721-5670.

buzz weekly •

SIGN ON BABY'S BIB: SPIT HAPPENS

503- 505- 508 E. White

www.weinercompanies.com

Furnished

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3rd and Clark August ‘05 beautiful, furnished 2, 3, and 4 bedroom apts. Ted 766-5108.

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|1-5|

408 E. Clark, C. For August. 1 BR near Beckman. Includes parking, trash. $500/mo.

Campo Rental Agency. 344-1927

APARTMENTS

MA Y 26

Furnished one bedrooms and efficiencies from $325, $365, and $395 near John and Second or Healey and Third. 356-1407.

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GREAT VALUE

| 22 - 23 |

306- 308- 309 White August 2005. 1 & 3 Bedroom furnished apts. Balconies, patios, laundry, dishwashers, off-street parking, ethernet available. 352-3182, 8411996, 309 S. First.

The University Group www.ugroup96.com

INTRO

under the cover

Editor’s Note This Modern World • Tom Tomorrow Life in Hell • Matt Groening News of the Weird • Chuck Shephard AP News Story First Things First • Michael Coulter

AROUND TOWN Sewing the Pieces Together • Erin Scottberg q + a with Nora Sage The Local Sniff • Seth Fein

LISTEN, HEAR Jeff Coffin interview • Kyle Gorman The Raveonettes review • Frank Krolicki The Raveonettes review • Todd J. Hunter Parasol Charts Sound Ground #77 • Todd J. Hunter The Hurly-Burley • Cornelia Boonman Mofro review • Susan Schomburg

MAIN EVENT Buzz Picks Calendar listings Art and Theater Listings Bob n’ Dave • Dave King

ARTS + ENTERTAINMENT Student art Displayed at Krannert Museum • Austin Happel & David Ruthenberg (Th)ink • Keef Knight Artist’s Corner with Katie Richardson

THE SILVER SCREEN Revenge of the Sith review • Andy Vecelas Star Wars reflections • Various writers Movie time listings Slowpoke • Jen Sorenson Drive Through Reviews

PHOTO • CONTRIBUTED BY JEANNINE BESTOSO

035

HELP WANTED

Employment Services Merchandise Transportation Apartments Other Housing/Rent Real Estate for Sale Things To Do Announcements Personals

MA Y 26

NO MORE RHYMES NOW, I MEAN IT ... ANYBODY WANT A PEANUT?

THE

22 • b u z z w e e k l y

“Crown of Frustration” by Jeanninie Bestoso is on display at Creation Art Studios and Gallery through June 5. p. 15

THE STINGER Free Will Astrology Jonesin’ Crosswords • Matt Gaffney

CLASSIFIEDS

Parkview Apartments 121 W. Park, Urbana Efficiency apartments for fall. Includes water, trash removal, on-site laundry. $395/mo. Campo Rental Agency 344-1927.

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OUT TO LUNCH: IF NOT BACK BY FIVE, OUT FOR DINNER ALSO.

chuck shepherd

LEAD STORY Air Travel Blues: (1) In March, a woman suffered a midflight heart attack, leading the KLM pilot to emergency-land at Heathrow Airport in London, but she died before an ambulance could arrive. Six months earlier, Heathrow officials had eliminated costly standby ambulances, resulting in the woman’s plane being met by a paramedic on a bicycle (which carried some emergency equipment but not nearly as much as an ambulance).

(2) In a major incident on Feb. 11, security officers at Dublin International Airport “booted” (in Ireland, clamped) an ambulance at a terminal entrance, even though it was parked in an area reserved for emergency vehicles; a patient with serious injuries was delayed until paramedics paid cash to have the boot removed.

BRIGHT IDEAS The East Valley Tribune reported in April that the police department in Mesa, Ariz., was still awaiting word about its $100,000 federal grant request to buy and train a capuchin monkey for its SWAT team. Capuchins are now used as assistance animals for the disabled, in that they can be taught to fetch things off of shelves, and the police want to see if one can be trained to unlock doors and search buildings on command. The Pentagon’s visionary research agency, DARPA, is considering the proposal.

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Life is either a daring adventure ... or nothing.

Dorothy Parker • Author

ing room in the middle of a procedure in order to cash a check at a nearby bank.

(Subsequently, Arndt was also charged with cocaine possession and sexual abuse of a minor.) In April 2005, prominent Boston plastic surgeon Joseph Upton stepped away from the operating room during a scheduled break in surgery at Beth Israel Deaconness Medical Center and walked down the street to Children’s Hospital Boston to conduct another surgery that he had double-booked for the time, before returning to Beth Israel and satisfactorily finishing the first job. Both patients are fine, but Dr. Upton was ordered not to double-book in the future and not to leave the floor during surgeries.

CREME DE LA WEIRD Gregory Withrow and an associate staged a two-man protest at the California state capitol in Sacramento in April against U.S. policies on Iraq and on immigration, and in favor of white supremacy, among other issues. The associate’s role in the protest was to drive 6-inch nails into Withrow’s hands on a cross as he stood as a martyr for six hours. Withrow had brought notes with him from a Butte County, Calif., health official (seemingly approving Withrow’s plan to hurt himself) and from the Sacramento Parks Department (affirming that no permit was needed for such a protest).

THE CONTINUING CRISIS Among the items cleared by senior Israeli rabbis as kosher for Passover this year, according to reports in the Jerusalem Post: the erectile-dysfunction drug Viagra (provided the pill is placed in special gelatin capsules before Passover begins). [New York Times, 4-15-05]

RECURRING THEMES In 2002, Boston surgeon David Arndt had his license suspended after he left the operat-

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The cure for boredom is curiosity.

There is no cure for curiosity.

y o u r e v e r y d a y n e w s but hell, we’re weekly

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COPYRIGHT 2004 Chuck Shepherd Distributed by Universal Press Syndicate

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Study: Children adopted from foreign countries adjust well A

abroad have been widespread in the media, and that may have skewed perceptions of these children.

The analysis involved studies on adoption between 1950 and 2005, involving more than 30,000 adoptees and more than 100,000 nonadopted children.

During that time, adoption has evolved from being a "shameful secret" to being celebrated and often very visible, especially with the relatively recent phenomenon of white parents adopting Chinese children, according to editorial author Dr. Laurie C. Miller of Tufts-New England Medical Center. In the United States alone, parents have adopted more than 230,000 children from other countries since 1989, she said.

Behavior problems were relatively uncommon among all children studied, but internationally adopted children had a 20 percent higher chance of being disruptive than nonadopted children, and a 10 percent higher chance of being anxious or withdrawn. They also were twice as likely as nonadopted children to receive mental health services.

Children adopted within their own countries had an 36 percent higher chance of being anxious or withdrawn than the international adoptees did, and a 50 percent higher chance of being aggressive or disruptive, the study found.

These children also were four times more likely than nonadopted children and twice as likely as internationally adopted children to receive mental health services. Also, domestically adopted youngsters had a 60 percent higher chance of having behavior problems than nonadopted children.

Some of the results probably reflect the parents who adopt foreign children, said Dr. Gregory Plemmons of Vanderbilt University's clinic for international adoptees. These parents often are high-achieving and financially well-off, and tend to seek out services like counseling for their children, Plemmons said.

Also, children adopted domestically may suffer from the instability of living with different foster families before getting adopted, Plemmons said.

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new study disputes the notion that children adopted from other countries tend to be badly damaged emotionally because of the hardships they had to endure.

The analysis of more than 50 years of international data found that these youngsters are only slightly more likely than nonadopted children to have behavioral problems such as aggressiveness and anxiety. And they seem to have fewer problems than children adopted within their own countries.

"Our findings may help them fight the stereotype that is often associated with international adoption," said researchers Femmie Juffer and Marinus H. van IJzendoorn of Leiden University in the Netherlands.

They pooled results from 137 studies on adoptions by parents living in the United States, Canada, Europe, Australia, New Zealand and Israel.

In the study, adopted children in general had more behavior problems than nonadopted youngsters, regardless of where the adoption took place—a result that is not surprising, since both groups often suffer deprivation and come from broken families.

But with backgrounds that often include abandonment, orphanages and civil strife, foreign adoptees are sometimes thought of as difficult, disruptive children—an image that the study does not support, the researchers said.

The results are generally reassuring for international adoption—an increasing phenomenon involving more than 40,000 children a year moving among more than 100 countries, the researchers said.

"Before adoption, most international adoptees experience insufficient medical care, malnutrition, maternal separation, and neglect and abuse in orphanages," the researchers said. But to their surprise, they found that these children do well and are largely able to catch up with their nonadopted counterparts.

The study appears in Wednesday's Journal of the American Medical Association.

A JAMA editorial said sensationalized stories about severely disturbed children adopted from

-Helen Keller

s c e n e

(March 21-April 19)

A judge in Los Angeles was peeved when a potential juror let out a loud yawn during the jury selection process. "I'm sorry, but I'm really bored," the man confessed. The judge found him in contempt and fined him $100. Similarly, Aries, the universe will find you in contempt if you let yourself get sucked into activities that dull your senses, shut down your curiosity, or numb your lust for life. This week it's your sacred duty to seek out only the most interesting stimuli.

TAU RU S

(April 20-May 20)

Most towns in Ghana have no street names, and the houses have no numbers. It's hard to find where people live if you've never visited them before. This is a good metaphor for an issue I want to bring to your attention, Taurus. There's a certain part of your life that has never been mapped, let alone organized. And yet it's not at all wild; in fact, it's like a bustling village where the streets have no names. It's high time you brought some order and discipline to this place.

GEMINI

(May 21-June 20)

Film actor Gianni Russo, best known for his portrayal of wise guys, has fathered 11 children with 10 different women. He'll be both your role model and anti-role model in the coming weeks, Gemini. Like him, your fertility will be abundant. Unlike him, you should focus this huge gift with precision and discrimination. Please don't work on any more than two brainchildren at a time.

CANCER

(June 21-July 22)

Research on newly discovered fragments of ancient New Testament texts reveals that Christian fundamentalists have been working under an erroneous assumption. The number of the Beast is not 666, as right-wing prophets of the apocalypse have long believed. The correct figure is actually 616. I mention this, Cancerian, because your ideas about enemies and evil are

what ’s your sign?

also about to undergo a revision. Freed from an illusion, you will at first be sad, then relieved, then confused, then elated.

LEO

(July 23-Aug. 22)

I have a dream that in the New World, everyone will be paid in direct proportion to how much beauty they create. There'll be an affirmative action program that ultimately makes most of us celebrities. Buddhist real estate developers will build a chain of sacred shopping centers in the heartland. The CEOs of the richest companies will be required by law to enjoy oncea-week sessions with Jungian psychotherapists. In the New World, April Fool's Day will come once a month. There'll be scientific horoscopes and mystical logic. Every one of us will have at least one imaginary friend. Compassion will be an aphrodisiac. Pioneers in artificial intelligence will develop computers that can talk to God. That's my vision of the New World, Leo. What's yours? It's a perfect moment to imagine your personal vision of utopia.

VIRGO

(Aug. 23-Sept. 22)

You've probably never heard of one of the greatest heroes of the last 100 years. Virgo microbiologist Maurice Hilleman (1919-2005) developed vaccines for measles, pneumonia, meningitis, hepatitis, and many other diseases. The Guardian said he saved more lives in the 20th century than anyone else. And yet, as is all-too-typical for Virgos, he never got anywhere near the acclaim he deserved. Having said that, I believe the coming weeks will depart from the astrological norm. Many of you Virgos will get much more of the recognition and rewards you have earned but never before received.

LIBRA

(Sept. 23-Oct. 22)

We're all in the closet in one way or another. Every one of us feels that there's some part of ourselves we've got to hide; that if we reveal the totality of who we really are, we will suffer. For example, U.S. Army Sgt. Robert Stout, who was wounded and got a Purple Heart for his service in Iraq, ulti-

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mately decided he was tired of being secret about his homosexuality. As a result, he can't re-enlist, even though he'd like to. My psychotherapist friend Alicia has always used astrology in her practice, but only recently chose to be open about it.

Some of her colleagues broke off relations when she told them. According to my reading of the omens, Libra, it's an ideal time to carefully come out of whatever closet you've been in. I'm not saying there'll be no repercussions; just that you'll have clarity and strength as you deal with them. And the freedom you create with your brave revelation will change everything for the better.

SCORPIO

(Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

One of Sesame Street's most recognizable characters is Cookie Monster. After years of feasting on all the cookies he wanted, the fuzzy blue puppet has recently been forced to limit his intake. In an effort to teach kids better eating habits, the show's producers even require Cookie Monster to sing a song called, "A Cookie Is a Sometimes Food." I vociferously protest this action. Born November 2, Cookie Monster is a Scorpio, and Scorpios shouldn't be compelled to tone down their desires as long as their desires aren't hurting anyone. You're on this earth to explore your cravings, to be led by your cravings to the frontiers of understanding. That's the only way they can teach you all they have to teach. Now go and commune with as many cookies (or your personal equivalent) as you need to.

S AG I T TA R I U S

(Nov. 22-Dec.21)

In the film 3-Iron, a man and woman meet and become lovers without ever speaking. They maintain their per fect silence even as they glide through a series of adventures, forging a sly, resilient harmony. Their romance provides a "fresh, confident vision of love as a kind of Buddhist refuge," reported *The Week.* While I don't recommend that you take up their model of intimacy forever, Sagittarius, I do think it's a per fect time to try it out for a brief period.

Do you dare? Spend a day or even a few hours with the person you're closest to without ever saying a word to each other. (Nonsense sounds are permissible.)

Homework: To get ready for a Summer of Love, write your ultimate personal ad. Address it to your current partner if you're already paired. Share it with me at www.freewillastrology.com.

CAPRICORN

(Dec. 22-Jan. 19)

California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger has no tolerance for his children's carelessness with their dirty clothes. His wife Maria Schriver says that if he finds the kids' pajamas and t-shirts lying around, he simply burns them. I urge you to take a page out of the Terminator's book, Capricorn. It's an excellent time to throw parts of your wardrobe into the fire--especially things that may still look OK but no longer suit your style.

You know what I mean: the clothes that remind you of the person you used to be but no longer are. Once you've got the blaze started, why not fling in a bunch of other stuff that's outdated, worn out, and weighing you down?

AQUARIUS

(Jan. 20-Feb. 18)

Last fall, millions of Ukrainians waged the "orange revolution."

Wearing orange scarves as their symbol of solidarity, they peacefully overturned the results of the rigged presidential election. Citizens of the ex-Soviet republic of Georgia had their own nonviolent insurrection in 2003, wielding bouquets of roses as they toppled their chief tyrant during the "rose revolution." I hereby proclaim the coming week to be the launch of the Aquarian tribe's "seed revolution." Inspired by the metaphor of the seed, you will weed out the rotting status quo and plant your seed-like ideas everywhere you go. Carry a packet of seeds with you at all times. What kind? Doesn't matter: pumpkin, wildflower, magic beans, or anything that excites your imagination.

PISCES

(Feb. 19-March 20)

In 2004 the U.S. federal government gave $2.2 billion to the 50 states, directing them to spend the money to defend against terrorism. So far, though, 86 percent of the donation remains unused. Many of the states can't seem to decide how to allocate the funds. This problem reminds me of a situation in your life, Pisces. You, too, have been blessed with a sizable endowment that you have not taken full advantage of. Is this the week you change all that? It might help to figure out the reasons why you have not yet understood the true purpose of gift.

jonesin crossword puzzle Across 1 Pull out prematurely 5 Warning notices 11 Heated start?

14 ___ extra cost 15 Makes over 16 Use a slip stitch, e.g.

17 Hook two balloons together at the end, bend slightly 19 Little rapscallion 20 Suck the energy from 21 Little cut 22 Rib in a bedframe 23 History books 25 Juicy part of a flower 27 Take a pink balloon, twist it in the middle, then twist at both ends 30 Unmatched, like socks 33 Don on the radio 34 Like Modest Mouse and Cake, at one time 35 Word before vacation 37 Like some hedgehogs 40 Well-mannered guy 41 Borden spokescow s o u n d s

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43 "Snug as ___..."

45 Football positions: abbr.

46 Blow up two green balloons almost all the way...and you're done 50 Vehicle for short flights 51 Candle store choices 55 Kill the dragon 56 Shapely suffix?

59 Oldest of the Hawaiian Islands 60 "Tic ___ Dough" 61 Take two balloons, hold them side by side, then twist the whole thing in the middle 63 Fig. on an inventory 64 Leaning type 65 Tandoor, e.g.

66 ___ Tafari, a.k.a. Haile Selassie 67 Mythical man-beasts 68 Tom and Meg's "You've Got Mail" director Down 1 Session with a podium, maybe s c e n e

2 Mazda maneuver 3 Bobby Ray who withdrew a Secretary of Defense bid under Clinton 4 He tried to join the Blue Man Group on "Arrested Development" 5 Abbr. in jazz fake books 6 Not so much 7 Idyllic place 8 Activity for some reporters 9 Conical domicile 10 ID on a 1040 11 Sleep around out of wedlock 12 Making comments 13 Math groups with no members 18 Former Chinese prime minister Zhou ___ 22 "Ten Summoner's Tales" singer 24 Kid's math homework 26 151, to Claudius 28 Short greeting with a nod

29 From Fuzhou or Fukuoka 30 Pavarotti or Stratas 31 Title given to fourteen Tibetans 32 Throws off 36 Little tune 38 The Grizzlies are part of it 39 Sounds stand-up comics elicit 42 Pam's follower?

44 Lizard that can make chirping noises 47 Bet predicting first and second place 48 React dispiritedly to 49 DVD box set division, maybe 52 New, in Naples 53 Guy who works with whips and chairs 54 Tourist city of Tuscany 57 Airport near Paris 58 Film ___ 61 Sorority letters 62 Hip-hop figures Answers on pg. 13

I N T R O | A R O U N D T O W N | L I S T E N , H E A R | M A I N E V E N T | A R T S & E N T E R TA I N M E N T | T H E S I LV E R S C R E E N | T H E S T I N G E R | C L A S S I F I E D S

20 • b u z z w e e k l y

HEY, A PAGE WITHOUT STAR WARS ON IT. seem to hate him either. Wisely, the film stays somewhere in the middle and lets the audience decide for themselves how to feel. In most cases, people won’t sympathize with Hitler, but they’ll have a new perspective from which to look at him, and this is where the film really succeeds. (David Just) FEVER PITCH 3 stars Drew Barr ymore & Jimmy Fallon Fever Pitch understands that the people who have season tickets near you can feel like a family and that rooting for the team can be comfor ting even when they lose. Fallon and Barr ymore make a charming, romantic duo with offbeat chemistr y. It’s a fitting tribute to love and baseball. (Matt Pais)

THE AMITYVILLE HORROR 2 STARS

Ryan Reynolds & Melissa George The Amityville Horror doesn’t exactly break any new ground, but it is less laughable and maintains a stronger, more consistent tone of creeping terror than the recent Hide and Seek or The Ring Two. Like the poor family that chooses to live in a mansion with evil in its walls, this unnecessar y remake of The Amityville Horror simply revisits something that was better left dead. (Matt Pais) CRASH

Matt Dillon & Don Cheadle A head-on collision of political posturing and racial intolerance, Crash is more than just an ar ticulation of the division between people of different backgrounds.

It’s about the thin line between love and hate that exists between cultures in America, and the 21st-centur y atmosphere of fear, anxiety and resentment that keeps ever yone on opposite sides of an invisible fence. (Matt Pais) DOWNFALL

HITCHHIKER’S GUIDE TO THE GALAXY

Martin Freeman & Mos Def In The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, interspace time travel is little more than extending your thumb and killing time around the universe while the Earth is put back together. There’s not a lot of depth, sophistication or cohesion to the movie, but its wink-wink sense of sly British humor more than succeeds in advancing it past the easygoing giddiness of a kid-friendly sci-fi fantasy.

(Matt Pais) THE INTERPRETER 2.5 STARS Nicole Kidman & Sean Penn If I’m not mistaken, a thriller should be thrilling.

Granted, there are some nail-biting sequences and spine-tingling moments, but there is too much vapid space used for filler. Though the premise is cer tainly original, the film stumbles through its lengthy running time and sparks more political debate than necessar y.

The Interpreter should have been exciting throughout, not melodramatic in some par ts and corny in others.

(Paul Prikazsky)

Bruno Ganz & Claudia Maria Lara Is it really possible to feel sympathy for Hitler and Nazi Germany? Downfall doesn’t glorify Hitler but it doesn’t

KINGDOM OF HEAVEN

Orlando Bloom & Eva Green Like Gladiator, it features searching, male protagonists set against quasi-historical backdrops. Other similar elements include grand wars, familial loss, political intrigue and unruly violence. Many of these same components have been exercised lately via Troy, Alexander and King Ar thur, to recall some. Disappointingly, Kingdom of Heaven often feels conventional and predictable. (Tim Peters) KUNG FU HUSTLE 3.5 stars Stephen Chow Take a healthy dose of slapstick, add a dash of kung fu fighting, a pinch of Looney Toons and ser ve with a popcorn and soda and you have a dish called Kung Fu Hustle that is sure to satisfy a much-needed comedy fix. The movie delivers action, drama, comedy and even a little suspense. Overall, it will make you laugh and then some, and just goes to prove that slapstick is universally funny. What more could you want from a movie? (Brian Nichols) MILLIONS

Lewis McGibbon & Alex Etel There’s a tenderness here that belongs to Etel and McGibbon, two fine young actors who not only embody their own par ts but play off one another so well that they work mar velously as brothers. The movie is undeniably theirs, two per formers whose total age is under 20 but possess an innate honesty beyond their years.

In a movie concentrating on what to do with money that you haven’t earned, these boys show that the greatest riches they have are each other. (Matt Pais) MONSTER-IN-LAW

Jennifer Lopez & Jane Fonda Monster-in-Law is Jennifer Lopez’s best movie since Maid in Manhattan. That should be the first warning. Co-star-

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ring with Lopez is the incomparable Jane Fonda. Together, these two take the audience on a roller coaster of emotion, from bemused all the way to annoyed. By the end, it is easily the worst two-hour mother’s day gift anyone in America could give to their mom. (Andrew Crewell) SIN CITY 3.5 STARS

Bruce Willis & Mickey Rourke Sinfully sexy and deliciously enter taining, Sin City is pumped with more testosterone and male fantasies than a Las Vegas bachelor par ty. If you can get past its boorish, hyper-macho approach to the sexes, director Rober t Rodriguez will plunge you deep into a seedy, intoxicating world of sleaze, deception and revenge.

(Matt Pais)

Fresh flicks

opening this weekend

THE LONGEST YARD Adam Sandler & Chris Rock Sandler takes a shot at the role originally held by Burt Reynolds in the 1974 film about an ex-football quarterback who finds himself incarcerated, and forced into leading a team of convicts against the guards in a game of smashmouth football.

Reynolds actually appears as a convict, and prowrestlers Bill Goldberg and Steve Austin make cameos of their own as guards. (Andrew Vecelas) MADAGASCAR Chris Rock & Ben Stiller The other Chris Rock movie of the week is an animated film about a group of zoo animals who break out of captivity to rescue their friend, only to find that being on their own in the wild is a lot different from living in Central Park Zoo. Also look (or listen, as the case may be) for the voices of David Schwimmer and Cedric the Enter tainer.

(Andrew Vecelas)

3!6/9 2OUTE "URWASH !VE

MADAGASCAR (PG) (3 SCREENS) Fri. & Sat. 12:30 1:00 1:30 2:40 3:10 3:40 4:50 5:20 5:50 7:00 7:30 8:00 9:10 9:40 10:10 11:20 Sun. - Tue. 12:30 1:00 1:30 2:40 3:10 3:40 4:50 5:20 5:50 7:00 7:30 8:00 9:10 9:40 10:10 LONGEST YARD (PG–13) (3 SCREENS) Fri. & Sat. 11:30 12:00 12:30 2:05 2:35 3:05 4:40 5:10 5:40 7:15 7:45 8:15 9:50 10:20 10:50 12:15 Sun. - Tue. 11:30 12:00 12:30 2:05 2:35 3:05 4:40 5:10 5:40 7:15 7:45 8:15 9:50 10:20 ◆ STAR

WARS: EP. III (PG–13) Fri. & Sat. 11:15 12:00 12:45 1:00 1:45 2:15 3:00 3:50 4:20 4:45 5:15 6:00 7:00 7:20 7:45 8:30 9:00 10:00 10:30 10:45 11:30 12:00 Sun. - Tue. 11:15 12:00 12:45 1:00 1:45 2:15 3:00 3:50 4:20 4:45 5:15 6:00 7:00 7:20 7:45 8:30 9:00 10:00

HOUSE OF WAX (R) Fri. & Sat. 1:00 4:00 7:10 9:40 12:00 Sun. - Tue. 1:00 4:00 7:10 9:40 KICKING & SCREAMING (PG) Fri. Sat. Mon. & Tue. 11:10 1:15 3:20 5:25 7:30 9:40 Sun. 11:10 1:15 3:20 5:25 KINGDOM OF HEAVEN (R) Fri. - Tue. 7:00 10:00 MONSTER-IN-LAW (PG–13) Fri. - Tue. 11:00 1:10 3:20 5:30 7:40 10:00 GUIDE TO THE GALAXY (PG) Fri. - Tue. 1:45 4:40 UNLEASHED (R) Fri. & Sat. 1:00 3:10 5:20 7:30 9:50 12:00 Sun. - Tue. 1:00 3:10 5:20 7:30 9:50 BORN INTO BROTHELS (R) Fri. & Sat. 11:30 1:30 3:30 5:30 7:30 9:30 11:30 Sun. - Tue. 11:30 1:30 3:30 5:30 7:30 9:30

CRASH (R) Fri. & Sat. 11:00 1:10 3:20 5:30 7:40 10:00 Sneak Preview: 12:15 CINDERELLA MAN (PG–13) Sun. - Tue. 11:00 1:10 3:20 Sun. 7:30 5:30 7:40 10:00

Showtimes for 5/27 thru 6/2

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first things first

coulter

And they’re such a damn waste of time, too MICHAEL COULTER • CONTRIBUTING WRITER

I was on student council

in high school.This is more an indictment on the quality of leadership in those days than it is a feather in my cap. I’m sure this will come as quite a surprise, but I didn’t really do much besides make smartassed comments and hit on smart girls who were trying their best to ignore me. I didn’t give a frog’s fat ass what happened at homecoming. I cared even less about having bake sales so we could buy a new dictionary for the library or goggles for the science club. (I mean, there’s a big difference between temporarily blind and permanently blind.)

Student council sort of sucked, but I’m glad I did it now. It got me used to meetings.

As a general rule, meetings, whether at work or socially, are a complete waste of time more often than not. Microsoft did a survey to determine the top time-wasters at work and, not surprising to anyone, 32 percent of the folks surveyed named pointless meetings as the top time-waster. Each person estimated spending 5.6 hours per week in meetings. Holy crap, 5.6 hours? That’s more time than I spend a week self-gratifying. I mean, seriously, a whole lot more time, and it seems like that’s all I do.

Um, anyway, back to the meeting thing.

Actually, I’m surprised more time isn’t spent on meetings. For something that is so uniformly despised, there still seems to be quite a lot of them. Maybe it gives everyone comfort to come together and meet. There is power in numbers. I mean, what if a snowstorm stranded us in this room for the next 30 days and we had to get all Donner Party on the situation. I bet we’d be happy there were several of us in the room for a meeting at that juncture.

The key word to the survey, though, was “pointless.â€? For example, I once attended a meeting where the sole purpose was to plan the time of our next meeting. Not only is that pointless, it’s also just absurd. “Well, we’re all here for the meeting today, so it might be best if we work on a date for the next meeting, because, well, it’s really hard to get us all in the room at the same time.â€? It’s like a snake eating its own tail ‌ maybe. I’m not sure I ever really understood that analogy.

It’s tough to hold people’s attention during a meeting.The worst is when the leader calls on you to make a suggestion or comment. “Jimmy, what are your thoughts on

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Meetings suck...

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"A GOOD ESSAY IS 10% INSPIRATION, 15% PERSPIRATION, AND 75% DESPERATION."

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the new plan?�The response you would like to give is,“Well, piss, I don’t know. Like virtually everyone else in the room, I wasn’t paying the first freaking bit of attention.

What the hell is this, second grade?� This statement isn’t appropriate in such situations, so you’re forced to bullshit, just like second grade.“Um, I can see the pluses and the minuses, more pluses than minuses, but still some of each. It’s not something we should rush into, I don’t think. We should have many more meetings on the subject to be sure of our direction.�

Personally, I like a meet- Michael Coulter ing where you get a bunch is a videographof hand-outs. Otherwise, I er, comedian end up creating little doo- and all around dles on my own pieces of smartass. But paper. “Oh good, Jerry read his column handed out a sheet with pie anyway. It’s graphs on it. I bet I can turn damn funny. those into smiley faces with a little creativity.� I swear, every time I look at my notes from a meeting they are always the same. I carefully write the date at the top of the page. Next I write down the topic of the meeting.After that, the meeting actually starts and I begin by drawing a few cubes on the page, then maybe a cartoon head with a caption coming out of his mouth that says, “This meeting sucks balls,� followed by a picture of a monkey with a cigarette in his mouth.

The meeting ends and I tear off the top sheet of paper and toss it in the garbage on my way out ‌ unless I drew a really cool monkey, in which case I’ll tack in on my bulletin board.

Even socially, meeting with your friends for a specific purpose other than simply to get intoxicated is usually a stupid endeavor. “Hey, let’s have a meeting and figure out what we’re gonna do for the party next weekend.� A meeting such as this is usually held in a bar. The party planners sit at a table, have a few pops and talk about general crap. Eventually, someone will be ready to leave, so in the last three minutes of the meeting, someone will offer to bring ice.

Someone else will offer to bring liquor, someone else beer.The meeting is now officially over with only three productive minutes to show for all the effort.

I’m sure there have been productive meetings. I’m sure there have been meetings that bring everyone together, meetings that produce results, meetings that are invaluable to the quality of work. I’m sure there are meetings that aren’t pointless. I gotta say though, I’ve never been to one.

“The Whole Family Loves to ReadBuzz.com�

No.

Rules.

Radio.

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It’s about realizing, painfully, you’ve kept that voice inside yourself, l o c k e d a w a y . And you step back and s e e that your jailer has changed faces.

You’ve become your own jailer.

MA Y 26

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I DON'T LIKE SAND. IT'S COARSE AND ROUGH AND IRRITATING AND IT GETS EVERYWHERE.

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19

: A LEGACY ON FILM

Tori Amos • Singer/songwriter and rape survivor

Reflections from our writers on the end of the biggest sci-fi series of all time

SEWING THE PIECES TOGETHER

ILLUSTRATIONS • BRITTANY BINDRIM

A

Since the release of the Star Wars prequel trilogy, the fans of the series have been split into two groups: loyalists and apologists. With the release of Episode III: Revenge of the Sith, much criticism has been focused on the acting, the dialogue and the CGI. The main problem is that many of these arguments have become tiresome and cliched. It’s not the dialogue but its delivery that makes Star Wars believable and despite the many complaints, there is a vast improvement in this chapter of the trilogy.

Don’t get bogged down in semantics and nitpicky complaints, this is a worthy installment to the saga and tons of fun. Once again, George Lucas has returned to the exciting, operatic experience of Star Wars taking the imaginations of a whole new generation to a galaxy far, far away. The circle is now complete; the Force is with this one.

“I guess it had a lot to do with alcoholism and how he changed after his legal issues; it wasn’t the same,” Erica says.

Erica has the ability to remove herself from a situation in order to view it through a lens unfogged by her emotions. She says it’s the best way to understand and make sense of what’s going on.

Sharing the attitude Erica, a senior studying speech communications at the University of Illinois, brings this attitude of survival to sexual abuse victims when she volunteers as a victim’s advocate for Rape Crisis Services in Champaign. Although she hasn’t had time to volunteer recently, she has acted as a RCS counselor since 2004.

In the spring of 2004, Erica went through the necessary 50 hours of training to become a rape crisis volunteer. After completing the training, she volunteered 10 to 15 hours a week. During a shift—5 p.m. to 9 a.m. on a weekday or 24 hours during the weekend—Erica wears a pager from RCS to answer hotline calls or go to the hospital as a medical advocate for a victim.

As a medical advocate, Erica offers victims any initial assistance they might need and informs them of their rights. She tries to support the victim’s sense of control over the situation and emphasizes that this is not their fault. All advocates carry a bag with literature, personal amenities and a change of clothes for the victim.

“We’re basically there to give them some comfort and let them know there are people out there willing to help them immediately,” says Erica.

That same spring, Erica was taking Community Health 199, a course the University teaches to train Freshman Year Campus Acquaintance Rape Education (FYCARE) facilitators. Between the two programs, she was going through 20-plus hours a week of training. Last fall, Erica taught the two-hour FYCARE sexual violence awareness seminar all University freshmen are required to take.

Erica is as vociferous inside the classroom as she is in her personal life.

“Erica’s fiery,” says Ross Wantland, her 199 instructor. “She has this righteous indignation, this really deep sense of justice that would lead her to challenging and responding to individuals in a way that allowed them to reflect on what they said and maybe think a different way.”

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The Empire Strikes Back SHADIE ELNASHAI

The intergalactic journey was unforgettable and George Lucas has proven capable of conducting a beautifully cinematic orchestra.

Episode III delivers the grand finale of fireworks and swordplay. With light sabers, of course. It is fitting that the sage teacher (Obi wan Kenobi), battling the dark side, must fend off his rebellious apprentice (Anakin Skywalker) in an epic battle of truly mythic proportions. Similarly, the prequels, while technologically superior, lack the reverence and wisdom of Episodes IV-VI. Whether or not the prequels or their predecessors left a greater impression is insignificant. But like the climactic duel, it was undoubtedly an incredible show.

Thanks for the ride, Mr. Lucas.

It was at the age of 4 that I first felt The Force. I practiced for months, trying to move objects or read people’s thoughts.When I failed, I acknowledged that I lacked the requisite discipline and focus. At 6 my iconoclastic syntactical inversions distinctly resembled those of a young Yoda, though more British. By 9 I was jumping out of second-floor windows, convincing myself that it hurt less as I was instinctively accessing The Force.When I was 13 my father would ground me, but I would calmly wave my hand and utter,“You don’t want to do that” … Obi-Wan style. He looked at me oddly, but undoubtedly recognized the power within me.At 16 my inflectional prosody had segued into a more Emperor-esque lilt.

In 2001 I participated in the British Census, and along with 390,000 other Brits I cited Jedi as my religion (I granted myself the title of Master due to my academy of converts). This 0.7 percent share put us as the fourth-largest religion in the UK. That is what Star Wars has meant to me.

DAVID JUST

It finally arrived. Perhaps the most anticipated film of the new millennium, Star Wars: Episode III: Revenge of the Sith is in fact the reason the prequel films were made. Episodes I and II are just building up to what transpires in Episode III. Despite the fact that we already know just about everything that occurs in the film, we have to see it for ourselves. With Episode III, Lucas has provided a terrific and worthy conclusion to the series, and given us the closure we have always needed.

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PHOTOS • 20TH CENTURY FOX

an attempt to understand why things are different.

“It’s always been known to me, ever since I was little, that this happened, that the abuse against him was not his fault.”

Erica’s mother, Rosemary Taffs, has always been honest with t 2 years old, Erica her daughter about Mr. Taffs’ experience with sexual abuse. The Taffs’ father walked into first time they talked about it was during a car ride when Erica her room to discover was 10 years old.

“My mom told me,‘Grandpa touched Dad in places adults shouldthat she had taken all her clothes out of the n’t touch kids,’” recalls Erica.“She said it made him sad and left a big dresser—she wanted to mark on him. She said it made him want to be a better father.”

To Erica, it was just another part of who her father was. It start dressing herself.

At 3, Erica told her didn’t change the way she looked at him—he was still her dad. mother she would no Mr. Taffs never sexually abused Erica.

“I never felt like my father didn’t love me. I knew for damn longer respond to the word “obey”—as she put sure he did.”

Erica attributes much of her it, she “wasn’t a dog.”

At 4, on a family trip understanding and acceptance of to Washington D.C., Erica the situation to her mother. “My threw herself down on the mom made sure I knew abuse is never sidewalk, threw a tantrum the fault of the victim.”

Erica’s endurance was pushed even furand demanded she be carried— ther when her father pleaded guilty to sexshe didn’t want to walk anymore.

At 5, she decided to sign her ual abuse charges on her 14th birthday in Social Security card—it was time 1998.

The terms of his 36-month probation to establish her identity.

“I was a willful child,” Erica says as her prohibited Mr. Taffs from living with fingers weave a needle and thread around the anyone under 18, including Erica. He edge of a patchwork quilt laying across her lap. moved to an apartment, but when that didn’t work out and the Taffs had a hard time find“Nobody could stop me.”

Then, at age 10, Erica learned that her father, the man who ing an affordable place for Mr. Taffs to live, sang her to sleep as a little girl, had been sexually abused as a child. A Erica moved out instead.

Every day for six months, Erica took the bus year later, Erica’s father became a perpetrator of sexual violence when he was charged with molesting a young girl outside the family. The after school to her parents’ house where she spent audacious 11-year-old accepted the facts and refused to let the situa- the next few hours doing normal eighth-grade tion dictate how she’d live her life. She is now a trained rape crisis things—doing homework, watching TV and visiting friends. At dincounselor and victim’s advocate nertime, she’d eat and remains determined to get with her parents, what she wants out of life. then spend time with As Erica, who grew up in them until around 10 Silver Spring, Md., continues There’s my dad as the victim, o’clock, when she would to stitch the white binding my dad as the perpetrator and get dropped off at the around the edge of her quilt, then me and then everything home of family friends—the she talks about how her mom Taffs had no relatives in helped her understand and face else ... it’s a lot to deal with.

Maryland so this was the closher family’s battle with sexual -Erica Taff, Rape Crisis Services volunteer est thing. She slept in the gueabuse through free discussion stroom in their basement of her father’s life and the cirand got a ride to school in cumstances around it. the morning.

“I really don’t understand all After the probation period was over, the Taffs moved the shame and guilt and grief that a lot of people feel (after experiencing sexual violence) because I’ve been surrounded by back in together but things weren’t quite the same. Her the opposite opinions for so long,” says Erica, attributing her father developed alcohol problems, and eventually the Taffs split up in late 2001 and finalized their divorce in the summer optimistic outlook to her mother’s nurturing.

There was never any shame attached to her family’s history, only of 2003.

ERIN SCOTTBERG • COMMUNITY EDITOR

RANDY MA

ALAN BANNISTER

1999: I remember when Episode I came out. I can recall the thrill of seeing the Tatooine desert landscape made new, the stunning effects, and of course the blazing blue and red glows captured in the light saber duels. But overall, I remember being disappointed. For many fans, young and old, The Phantom Menace lacked what we were looking for, and instead gave us Jar Jar Binks and an unimpressive desert speeder race. Attack of the Clones in 2002 lifted our expectations and gave us something to hope for in the conclusion of the Star Wars prequels.

With the release of Revenge of the Sith, George Lucas redeems himself. In a way it all makes sense now, and the disappointment of the first two episodes is now replaced with appreciation of the whole, thanks to the well-made transition of Revenge of the Sith into the original trilogy, with countless moments that play off the scenes that captured the world’s imagination from ‘77 to ‘83.

Thank you, Mr. Lucas.

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ARE CHILDREN WHO ACT IN R-RATED MOVIES ALLOWED TO SEE THEM?

SEWING PIECES C O N T I N U E D F RO M PA G E

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For Erica, the class was a catharsis. “I had a really, really hard time. It brought up everything I’ve been dealing with right then and cleansed it all out.”

Putting the pieces together But to get to that point required going through some painful memories. For the first time, Erica acknowledged her personal experience with sexual assault.

“It all kicked me in the face and I was dying for a while,” she says.

Erica closed up and began to cut people out of her life, something she had never done. She stopped coming around to her friends’ houses and spent a lot of time by herself.

“There were so many aspects that go into the whole thing, you know?” Erica says. “There’s my dad as the victim, my dad as the perpetrator and then me and then everything else ... it’s a lot to deal with. If I was going to be an effective counselor, I had to deal with my stuff and get it all out.”

And that she did, with a lot of help from her mom. “It’s nice to have an ally in the family who knows me so well, who understands where I’m coming from,” Erica says. Mrs. Taffs became a leaning post for Erica.

“The divorce and the alcoholism and the legal trouble and the

Empire had the better ending.

I mean, Luke gets his hand cut off, finds out Vader's his father, Han gets frozen and taken away by Boba Fett. It ends on such a down note.

That's what life is, a series of down endings.

STAR WARS EPISODE III:

All Jedi had was a bunch of Muppets.

REVENGE OF THE SITH

-Clerks

sexual abuse, it all really hit her,” says her mother. “That’s not just something you get through. It changes your life.”

Erica and her mother are very close. They shop together, gossip together, dine together and provide unfaltering support for each other. “We’ve had to really cling to each other in the last couple of years,” Erica says.

Growing up, Mrs. Taffs taught Erica the importance of getting things off your chest and encouraged Erica to talk to her friends rather than hold stuff in.“My opinion is that you spill your guts and share with your girlfriends and stuff life that,” explains Mrs. Taffs.

Erica followed her advice and shared everything with her friends to help her cope.

While working things through, one of the only people she remained close with was her friend Carol Czarnecki, whom she met freshman year at U of I and lived with in the dorms as a sophomore.

Carol and Erica have the kind of relationship that doesn’t need perpetual conversation—much of it is on a “silent basis,” as Carol puts it.

“We don’t always need to be talking to have a good time. There are countless times I can remember us going out on drives to escape for a bit, and we would just cruise and not say anything at all to each other.We found comfort in just being in the presence of one another,” Carol wrote in an e-mail sent from Manchester, England, where

she is studying this semester.“Being in England, I realize how much she contributes to my sanity.”

Erica knows the power of listening, too. Carol says that sometimes the best thing Erica does is listen to her vent. “She’ll sit there and listen to what I have to say and offer the support I need, even it it’s just another persons telling me that I’m not overreacting. Going through some things ... Erica was the best thing I could have asked for.”

But for Erica, each separate incident is just another piece sewn into the woman she has become. She takes from each situation the courage necessary to endure challenges that would rip some people apart at the seams.

“In some respects, Erica had to grow up much earlier than most girls. She’s dealt with her family problems, many of her friends’ problems and her own personal dilemmas in ways I couldn’t even imagine,” writes Carol.

As Erica holds out her nearly finished quilt, inspecting the stitches connecting squares of old T-shirts from the Goodwill store, she says, “It’s my mother’s strength and support that has gotten me through all this crap.”

At 21 years old, Erica is ready to get through whatever may be ahead—she calls the shots. buzz

ANDREW VECELAS • FILM EDITOR

Finally, 22 years after the closing credits of Return of the

Lucas no longer has his vision limited by the technology available.

Jedi, George Lucas has given us another film worthy of the Star Wars title. Episode I was marred by an innocuous plot and characters that always felt out of place, and Episode II came to a screeching halt by trying to mix scifi epic with embarrassingly trite romance.

While Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith is not immune to some of the problems that plagued its predecessors, it has enough excitement and spectacle to make up for its shortcomings.

Much of the fun of the original

Star Wars trilogy rests in the experience of being thrown in a galaxy far, far away with reckless abandon. Lucas was comfortable with just hinting at the larger backstory that explained the motivations and histories of his characters, striking a fine balance between a sweeping plot and the nonstop adventure that distinguished the films. Now in the prequel trilogy, he’s been forced to detail at length the political maneuvers and minute explanations that never bogged down the original films, and the series has obviously suffered as a result.

Here Lucas’ script does a better job of alternating the action that Star Wars fans crave with the story he needs to develop.The first two-thirds of the film focus on the gradual transformation of Anakin Skywalker (Hayden Christensen) from a headstrong Jedi to the mechanically vicious Darth Vader. Anakin loses his trust in the Jedi council and is wooed to the dark side

by Senator Palpatine (Ian McDiarmid), who reveals himself as the menacing Sith Lord who the Jedi have long sought.

This seduction occurs in the midst of a number of impressively staged action pieces. Make no mistake, the Star Wars films have always been special-effects laden extravaganzas, and Revenge of the Sith definitely delivers with the eye candy.

Many of the scenes have so much going on in the background that additional viewings are practically necessary in order to take all of it in. The opening space battle occurs on an almost unprecedented scale. Most of the later light saber fights and battle scenes are equally impressive. It seems Lucas no longer has his vision limited by the technology available, as practically every scene takes place before a generally convincing digital backdrop.

Though the film brings the series to new heights visually,

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it does so with a number of dramatic hiccups along the way. It is an understatement to say that Lucas has trouble generating convincing and entertaining dialogue. The romantic scenes between Christensen and Natalie Portman, two actors who have proven their considerable talents in other films, still have not improved much over the last film. It’s a wonder Anakin and Padmé have managed to stay together, since they display nothing in the way of chemistry or interesting dialogue.

Christensen also grates on the nerves in many of his later scenes, as he still proves incapable to look convincingly angry or use inflection in his voice.

When he finally is transformed into the black-clad Darth Vader fans have been waiting to see, complete with voice by James Earl Jones, Lucas manages to spoil an otherwise powerful (and long-awaited) moment with a laughable reference to classic monster films.

On the bright side, McDiarmid has some fun with his role as the evil Emperor, bringing some life to a series whose most distinguished performance has thus far come from a small green puppet. The cast is rounded out by Ewan MacGregor and Samuel L. Jackson, as Jedi knights Obi-Wan Kenobi and Mace Windu, respectively, who bring some life to otherwise plain dialogue.

Other seasoned actors such as Christopher Lee and Jimmy Smits do well in what little screentime they have.

In other words, it’s pretty much business as usual for Star Wars. Corny dialogue and flat performances are as much staples of the series as light sabers and cheesy aliens (a fact that typically gets overlooked by critics).

The pedestrian dialogue typically serves only to advance to the next impressive setpiece. As long as Lucas keeps the action moving and enthralling, it’s easier to overlook the shortcomings.

Luckily, Revenge of the Sith has enough momentum to plow through tiny roadblocks such as banal dialogue and unconvincing performances. While it may not overtake the original trilogy in terms of quality, it’s a proper bridge between the old and new. If it is indeed the last film in the legendary series (at least for now), it at least returns to the qualities that made Star Wars so successful to begin with.

Nora Sage is the volunteer coordinator at Rape Crisis Services, an organization that offers support and services to victims of sexual violence and the people who care about them. All services are free and confidential, and RCS assists people of all genders and races from all walks of life. She has worked at RCS since October 2003 and has volunteered in social services organizations most of her life. As the volunteer coordinator, it is her job to organize the training and education of volunteer advocates to enable them to be of the most assistance to a victim.

How did you come to be the volunteer coordinator at Rape Crisis Services?

I was a volunteer coordinator in Tucson, Ariz., for the community mediation program.Then I moved here and applied for the job as volunteer coordinator for Rape Crisis Services. Happily, I got it.

What made you want to get involved with RCS?

I really love the idea that someday we can end violence against women and children.We’re a grass-roots organization.We help victims through all kinds of outreach, talk to people about sexual assault and help them become aware. Rape is really a silent thing.We’re taught as kids not to talk about these types of topics. We want to get it out in the open so people know that it’s really going on.

Did you go to school for this type of work?

I went to Old Dominion University in Virginia and studied health care, but as I got older—well, I was a member of NOW (National Organization for Women) in college, so I always felt like I was a feminist activist and I’ve always been a volunteer. I started out candy striping in junior high. I’ve worked for a children’s hospice, I volunteered doing youth mediations and I did home building at a place like Habitat for Humanity called Primavera Foundation—there are a lot of places that I have volunteered. To me, it’s always been really important. That’s why I value my volunteers so much. Most of them are college kids and they take time out of their schedule (to train and volunteer when they could

be partying, when they could be studying.) They take shifts where they carry the pager, meet the victim at the hospital, and let them know what their rights are, let them know what their options are. The police are there to try to solve a case, the nurse is there to collect forensic evidence, so no one’s really there for the victim except for us.

What do you do outside Rape Crisis Services?

I volunteer for a victim-offender mediation program. It’s for kids—juveniles—who get arrested for some type of crime like tagging or that type of thing. Instead of sending them to juvenile court, we’ll set up a mediation between the business that they may have done graffiti on (in the case of tagging) and the kid can do restitution through community service rather than having to start a life of crime. I think it’s really a good thing.

What is most rewarding about your work?

I would say, for me, working with volunteers is the most rewarding.

After they leave, I get letters and e-mails saying that their experience here changed their lives. In some cases, even changed the direction they want their lives to go. And I’m just humbled by them.They give so much at a young age. All our volunteers are so sincere and they’re just amazing people.To be able to get up at 3 in the morning and go to the hospital to meet a victim and see what’s happened, and listen to her story and be able to pull yourself out of it enough to give her exactly what she needs the way that she wants to accept all of her decisions, all of her choices ... that’s where I found the most satisfaction.Training them, teaching them, seeing them get the ah-ha! moment when we try to get rid of a rape myth or talk about cultural sensitivity and repression issues and things like that.

What myths would you like to dispel here?

There are a lot of common rape myths. She was wearing sexy clothes so she was asking for it. She was drinking, what did she think would happen? I’ve even had parents say that in front of their kids. Say, ‘I told her not to drink.’ I tell them her drinking didn’t make her deserve to have this happen.

PHOTO • DAVID SOLANA

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ISN'T DISNEY WORLD JUST A PEOPLE TRAP OPERATED BY A MOUSE?

MA Y 26

seth fein

the local sniff

Open Letter to CU Smoke-Free Alliance

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I have had the chance to think about your response to my column condemning you for breaking down freedom in America. And while I still stand by the ideal that no governing body should have dominion over someone’s private property, I believe that, given the recent news, there is some sort of compromise to be worked out here.

Let’s play pretend for a little while.

Let’s pretend that we are in a relationship. I’ll be the dominant and talkative person even if you don’t want that role. But let’s pretend that we are in love and we are having an argument.

I say that smoking should be allowed in private establishments such as bars and restaurants, and you say that smoking should be banned in those places because it has been proven to have an adverse effect on the health of innocent bystanders.

So, we have a problem, yes?

Let’s take the advice of some marriage counselors. Instead of putting the problem between us, let’s stand together, and put the problem in front of us.This way we can see the problem clearly and have a chance to compromise, and most importantly, collaborate on this most important issue. You want things to change and I want to stand by your side and support your efforts.

There is a fundamental difference in the way we are seeing

this problem, and I would like the chance to clear this up.

You believe that restaurants and bars are public domain. But if the toilet breaks at The Iron Post, who has to fix it? If the refrigerator stops working in Lil’ Porgy’s, can they call the city to come repair it?

The answer is no.They can’t.They have to pay for someone to fix it or they have to do it themselves.This is what separates a public building from a private building. If the computers shut down at the courthouse, we all pay for it, because it is a public facility, right? Let’s not go around telling people what they can and can’t do in their places of business. I mean, they pay for the toilets. They pay the taxes. So let’s leave the decision to allow smoking in their businesses up to them.

Good. I’m glad we got that settled. So, now that we’re clear on that, let’s move on to the collaboration part of this reconciliation.

I am a smoker, and you are saddened that I am ruining my health and in effect ruining the health of others voluntarily. I am sorry. I really am. But I am afflicted with an addiction; a disease.

And while I take responsibility for my actions, I need you to be patient with me. I am willing to try to get better, so let’s start with something that is core to this issue.

When I was a child, I was influenced by certain people to start smoking at a young age. Again, I am not assigning blame to anyone else here, but I was young and impressionable.

Certainly, my mom and dad were good about keeping me away

GOOD NIGHT. GOOD WORK. SLEEP WELL. I'LL MOST LIKELY KILL YOU IN THE MORNING.

ar tist’s corner

Katie Richardson

Marvin Gaye says: “Let’s get it on!”

Dear fellow citizens,

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from smoke and it only seems fair that, because it’s illegal to buy and smoke cigarettes until you’re 18, we keep smoke away from the young people. I don’t want my future children inhaling some person’s Viceroy 100 and I don’t want any child now to inhale my USA Gold Light.

So how about we join hands and fight this issue together?

Let’s move to ban all cigarette smoking in privately-owned places that allow children under the age of 18. I think that it’s only fair for us adults to be able to dictate what we do, but let’s keep the smoke out of the children’s lungs. As a smoker, I HATE it when people are smoking around me when I eat and what’s more, I don’t want Seth Fein is from to influence or harm any young children while Urbana. He would I’m suffering from my affliction. What do you like to point out that say? Can we work together on this?

Bill Hicks died of Now that we’re done playing pretend, pancreatic cancer, not please write me. My email address is seth- of any smoking related fein@hotmail.com. I want to change city pol- disease. For the record. icy as much as you do now. Let’s join up and He can be reached at fight this thing. But I am only willing to join sethfein@hotmail.com your alliance if you are willing to accept my compromise. I am a good organizer and can be a fairly persuasive speaker. I mean after all, I still have a job writing for Buzz, even after that whole mayor thing.What do you say, partners?

THE SALVAGED TONGUE

PHOTO • DAVID SOLANA

8 • buzz weekly

Katie Richardson is a recent graduate of the University of Illinois. She has obtained degrees in creative writing, English and journalism. She is currently looking for a job, as writing poetry is a skill that is not, in and of itself, terribly lucrative.

What inspires you?

Wit. Cynicism. Altruism. Friends. People who express themselves in a cunning, cutting or precise manner without being cliché and trite.

When did you start writing poetry?

I started reading and writing poetry when I was in high school. At that time I was way into projecting ‘the dark girl’ persona. Basically, I read Plath, Sexton, Dickinson—all the misery chicks.

I didn’t really look at poetry then as an art form.

I didn’t see it as something that was composed or recognize the ways in which poetry can transcend being a solipsistic vehicle that expresses one person’s basic human emotion.What I wrote then was ridiculous. All of those ‘pieces’ were about death, sadness and how hard being white and middle class in America is, etc. Basically, I considered myself artistic because I had a melancholy disposition and I dyed my hair burgundy.

What is your greatest weakness?

My greatest weakness as a writer is my inability to force myself to write every day. I get lazy sometimes, which has been many writers’, greater writers than me, downfall.

b u z z w e e k l y • 17

My greatest weakness as a human being is my inability to articulate myself well during everyday conversations. Most people who know me only casually have good reason to assume I’m a scatterbrain.

What is your greatest strength?

My greatest strength as a writer is my ability to rework pieces that I have written. I don’t mind revising; in fact, I regard revision as an absolute necessity.

My greatest strength as a human being is my ability to look below the surface of people.

I think the public face is only the beginning of any one person’s humanity.

How do you handle criticism?

Well, if the critic has made some good suggestions, if they have kept the poem’s thematic thread and aesthetic in mind while making suggestions, then I am more than happy to accept criticism. In fact, I think that I am in constant need of helpful suggestions. A more exact word or a different way of expressing a thought will probably only serve to benefit me and the work. However, if someone disagrees with a political or social statement the piece is making then I probably won’t change anything. In those cases I simply say, ‘If I subscribed to your value system then I would find your insights interesting and enlightening, however, since I do not, I think I will leave this just as it is.’

The tongue, after it was held triumphantly in the hand of the sea witch, after the blood dripped down her fingertips, after she smiled sinisterly at it, after it stopped being able to taste the salt on her hand, was thrown into a fire burning under one of her witches’ brews. The mermaid sprouted legs and rose to the surface, never married the prince, then died.

She was fifteen and stupid and the sea witch knew this: The mermaid had settled for a stupid clod, who really just wanted a nice land girl. As a child, I would have liked it better if the sea witch had thrown the damn thing in her trashcan, or a compost pile or the back seat of her car. For if this is Hans Christian Anderson’s parable depicting the perils of losing one’s virginity too soon, then her fate was sealed the second that cherry tongue morphed into a pile of ash. The mermaid didn’t have the chance to turn back. She couldn’t slip in the witch’s lair and sift through a pile of old banana peels for that priceless organ, then find an old sewing kit and stitch the bugger back on. In retrospect, that might have been an unsanitary and under-effective course of action. So, instead, I should like to make the mermaid realize that though she cannot talk anymore, she can certainly still draft a farewell letter to that thoughtless monarch, and then buy herself some nice red shoes. I’d like her to wear those heels everywhere she goes. Along with a low-cut dress, and then go home with every guy she finds attractive who’s willing and able to show her a good time. I’d like her to enjoy it. I’d like her to keep the shoes on while they’re in bed, and I want her to shove her heels in the air and open her mouth as large as she can. I want her to dig her nails so hard into their backs that they are the ones left screaming. I want her to make good use of the hole that the witch, that he, left her with. I want her to realize that it was they who placed such great value on it. And that she didn’t lose anything, she traded it in, because it was hers, because she was a wild little rebel who liked taking chances, and lusted for the opportunity to emerge from a deep boring blueness into the world of red shoes and ecstatic stimulation. And that she’s free now. And she’s only just had a taste of what’s out there.

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every

artist was first an amateur

M U S I C SHOULD NEVER BE HARMLESS

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Daring Displays

JEFF COFFIN’S MU’TET:

Seniors show work in first-ever BFA art exhibit at the Krannert Art Museum

Robbie Robertson • The Band

A NECESSITY OF EXPRESSION AT SUMMER CAMP KYLE GORMAN• MUSIC EDITOR

s DAVID RUTHENBERG • STAFF WRITER

PHOTOS • AUSTIN HAPPEL

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very student earning a bachelor’s degree in fine and applied arts either at the end of the spring semester or in December 2005 was invited to show their work in the first-ever BFA art exhibit; a total of 79 graduating students gladly accepted.This marked the first time anything of this nature has ever been attempted by the University, and will hopefully start “a new tradition,” says Alan Mette, art and design faculty member and member of the BFA Exhibition Committee.

Art education, ceramics, glass, graphic design, industrial design, metals, painting, photography and sculpture were all represented in the exhibit, giving all patrons the opportunity to snack liberally from the art and design variety platter and appreciate the laborious art students who lie in work-saturated hiding for most of the year.

A table on display at the BFA exhibition in the Krannert Art Museum Thursday, May 12.

ummer Camp is a multi-night festival in Chillicothe, Ill., (just north of Peoria). Taking place this upcoming Memorial Day weekend, the festival is three nights of music and primitive camping put on by Jay Goldberg Events & Entertainment (the same people responsible for The Canopy Club).The festival features three nights of music from headliners moe., a performance by local favorites Apollo Project and even dance music from SCI Fidelity house artist DJ Harry. Buzz chatted with Jeff Coffin, reed player for Béla Fleck & The Flecktones and leader of his own Mu’tet, who will be appearing at Summer Camp on Sunday.

How does one learn to listen?

There is a number of different ways. One of the things is how to listen to the music and what to listen to.If you’re looking at a piece of art, you can look at the picture and the frame, or you can get into great detail.You can actually see the brush strokes, where (the artist) may have used blue in this corner ...

You can really get into the transparency of the music, by just listening to the high hat, or the piano, or the bass or the soloist ... eventually, all that stuff unfolds and you’re able to listen to everything, but still be able to pinpoint different things.

Buzz: What is the ‘Mu’tet’ about?

Jeff: It’s from the word ‘mutation.’ It’s always changing, and we can play any music with that group. It’s meant to be a little bit of a community.

Like hand-independence in drumming, for example?

There is ear independence—it’s also the same thing.The ear learns to be able to listen to a lot of things at once.

Anyone who has seen you knows about your ability to play two saxes. How did that evolve, and for what purpose?

It’s a Roland Kirk thing. He’d actually do three at a time.

(The hard part is) trying to figure out different fingerings for things. I do a Montuno thing, drone on one of the horns. A number of years ago, I was playing in an acid jazz group (when that was happening), and we didn’t have any harmony players, so I tried to provide some harmony with the two horns.

Do you ever have difficulty playing in different keys at once?

That’s the trick: thinking in two keys at once.

You have various pedals in your setup. How do you use electronics to enhance your performance?

I use them as a different sound, a different sonic texture. I use an envelope filter, I use a harmonizer, I use a digital delay pedal. I use a phase shifter, whatever I can use that I think actually sounds decent.

Above: Kimberly Skukas' mixed-media sculpture titled "Bus Stop" displayed in the BFA art exhibition at the Krannert Art Museum on Thursday, May 12.

Left: Two angles of Ashley Gierke's "Duplicity" displayed on the floor of the BFA art exhibition at the Krannert Art Museum on Thursday, May 12.

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Could you give an example of how you use the harmonizer?

PHOTO • COURTESY OF CORRINA GREENBERG For example, on ‘Mad Hatter Rides Again,’ there’s a bass breakdown, there’s a series of hits. I put it on a tritone and play a major third and it gives me the flat seven underneath it. If I was going to put a harmony on it, the harmonizer is giving me the harmony I’d put on it.

You regularly have the opportunity to play with Béla, who is such a great improviser.

How do you interact with someone who can go in any direction?

We are all trained, at this point, as improvising musicians, to hopefully be able to go anywhere on the fly. A lot of it is learning how to listen.

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You play a lot of sax on bluegrass/country tracks with the Flecktones. What’s your method for adding sax in these pieces?

I don’t want to sound like Shorter or Coltrane over ‘Big Country.’ I’m going to let the tune or the spirit of the music tell me how that music is supposed to be played. I’m going to try to morph but still maintain my individuality.

Listening, that’s the one big thing.The harmony is a given, the rhythm is a given.

What are the Flecktones up to right now?

There’s a new record that’s in the works. It’ll be out at the very beginning of 2006.

Can we expect as many guests as the last record?

There are no guests, just the four of us. It was something we wanted to do on the last CD.We let providence decide what we’re going to do on it.

Who are your spiritual forebears in your playing?

Guys like Coltrane, Miles Davis ...Albert Ayler, Ornette Coleman, Abdullah Ibrahim, Keith Jarrett, Inayat Khan.

They have a necessity of expression.

What sax player should people these days listen to?

Ravi Coltrane, John Coltrane’s son. Chris Potter; Mark Turner is ridiculous.There are certain guys who come to the top who really sound like themselves. buzz

Summer Camp begins today (for early birds) and continues through to Sunday in Chillicothe.

For more information or to purchase tickets, go to www.jaytv.com.

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BY FRANK KROLICKI

On their first full-length release, 2003’s Chain Gang of Love, The Raveonettes offered up a collection of songs that sounded like the result of a jam session between the ghosts of Buddy Holly and Joey Ramone. Its bubblegum melodies were filled with distortion and bizarre, spooky street imagery, creating a package that somehow worked. Pretty in Black, the follow-up, finds the Danish duo and their now fleshed-out band turning down the noise and incorporating a bit more variety, which will probably leave half their audience disappointed and the other half pleased.

The Raveonettes have never been shy about citing their heroes. Their name is a constant reminder of their love for Brill Building ‘60s girl-group pop (take out the “-ave-”), which marks some of the high points of the album. Sharin Foo coos through a fluffy, surprisingly faithful cover of The Angels’ 1963 hit,“My Boyfriend’s Back.”You almost have to wonder why it’s there, but it becomes irrelevant as it is just as infectious and fun as the original. For their “Ode to L.A.” (and to retro girl-group pop itself), the band sought out former Ronette and seasoned bad girl Ronnie Spector for guest vocals. It’s an overt effort to mimic the lush,“wall of sound” style that Phil Spector mastered with the Ronettes, and perhaps that’s why it works so well. The band makes no secret of the fact that these songs are the result of an intense love of the music that inspired them.

The first single, “Love in a Trashcan,” is a swaggering guitar number with disposable-yet-memorable lyrics about girls falling for trashy, no-good guys. When Sune Rose Wagner proclaims, “If you touch that girl, you know it’s OK/People say she’s a whore anyway/I think she looks like a nice vamp/Looking for love in a trashcan,” you know you’re in for music that doesn’t take itself too seriously. Almost as fun is “Twilight,” which employs a churning disco stomp that truly allows The Raves to rave.

“Here Comes Mary” combines a lilting melody with disturbing lyrics, and could be the equally grim sequel to The Shangri-Las’ “Leader of the Pack.” It’s a novel idea to follow up on the aftermath of that musically infamous motorcycle

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PARASOL RECORDS TOP 10 SELLERS

crash—quite possibly the most melodramatic moment in rock ‘n’ roll history—and the result is captivating. Also downbeat, the folk balladry of “Uncertain Times” manages to be dreamy, dark and hopeful all at once, boasting the lyrics, “And if the atom bomb should end us both/I’ll be happy to go to the stars with you.”

Some songs don’t fare as well. “The Heavens,” a sleepy ballad that Wagner says he wrote for Elvis, had he been alive today, is nice after a few listens but ultimately a dull, forgettable opener. “If I Was Young” suffers from the same problem. “Somewhere in Texas” is a wasteland of a song that succeeds in conjuring desert imagery but not in going anywhere musically special.

Overall,The Raveonettes justify the changes they made to their sound on Pretty in Black enough to make it a must-have disc for fans and a worthwhile listen for curious observers. The noisy bite of Chain Gang of Love is noticeably absent and will no doubt be missed enough by some to consider this material a letdown. But what the album lacks in intensity it makes up for in variety—and variety makes for a more interesting rave.

MA Y 26

22nd Annual Memorial Day Barbecue [Pork chop or chicken dinner includes cole slaw, baked beans, roll and a beverage] Evangelical Covenant Church, 260 S. Union, Paxton, 11:30am, $6.50/person

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1. Orange Peels • Circling The Sun (Parasol) 2. The Frames • Burn the Maps (Anti) 3. The Jan Martens Frustration • The S/T (Hidden Agenda) 4. Snow & Voices • The S/T (Birdsong) 5. Celestine • Between Bedtime and Sunrise (Exergy/Starfly) 6. Mercury Rev • Secret Migration (V2) 7. Perishers • Let There Be Morning (Nettwerk) 8. Spoon • Gimme Fiction (Merge) 9. Moonbabies • War on Sound (Hidden Agenda) 10. Bjorn Norestig • Come Take a Shine (A Westside Fabrication)

May 31 Live Music Bluegrass Jam [amateurs and professionals welcome] Verde Gallery 7-9:30pm, free The Crystal River Band Rose Bowl Tavern 9pm, free Open Stage Espresso Royale Goodwin & Oregon 8pm, free Larry Gates [acoustic] The White Horse Inn 10pm, free ThreeLegChair Moonstruck Chocolate Co. 8pm, free DJ Subversion: DJ ZoZo, DJ Evily, DJ TwinScin [goth/industrial/electro] The Highdive 10pm, $2

The Raveonettes Pretty in Black

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42.7 PERCENT OF ALL STATISTICS ARE MADE UP ON THE SPOT.

Tremblin BG Barfly 10pm, free DJ Reaganomics [‘80s music] Cowboy Monkey 10pm, free DJ J-Phlip OR DJ Lil Big Bass Boltini 10:30pm, free DJ Mike 'n Molly's TBA Karaoke "G" Force Karaoke Neil St. Pub 8pm-12am, free Liquid Courage Karaoke Geovanti's 9pm-1am, free

7:30pm, free

Fitness Water Aerobics [Introductory course for those considering the pool as a way to get in shape.]

Mettler Center 9:30am, free Belly Dance for Fitness The Fitness Center Champaign 8pm, $7-$9 Kids Storytime Pages for All Ages 7pm, free

Books Fiber Arts Discussion Group [Discuss topics from a fibercraft related book while working on crafts, chatting, and sharing tips and techniques.

This week is a knitting refresher. Participants will need to bring size 6-9 knitting needles and a skein of light-colored worsted weight yarn. The book will be Knitlit: Sweaters and Their Stories...and Other Writing about Knitting, by Linda Roghaar and Molly Wolf.]

Pages for All Ages

wednesday June 1 Live Music Apollo Poetics: Apollo Project with guest DJs Nargile, 10pm, free Chambana Jackson’s Ribs-n-Tips, 8-

10pm Ed O'Hare and Friends Rose Bowl Tavern 9pm, free Blues Night: Kilborn Alley Tommy G's 10pm, free

Urbana Booking Co. Presents: The Living Blue, Tractor Kings, The Situation The Canopy Club 9pm, $5

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DJ Chef Ra [roots, reggae] Barfly 10pm, free Karaoke Liquid Courage Karaoke Geovanti's 10pm-2am, free Outlaw Karaoke The White Horse Inn 10pm, free Dancing Tango Dancing Cowboy Monkey 7:30pm, free Salsa Dancing Cowboy Monkey 10pm, free Lectures, Meetings, Workshops Open Poetry Night [writers may read their own work or just listen] Illini Union Bookstore 7-8 pm Fitness UIUC Yoga Club Illini Union room 406 7:30pm, free

Columbia

BY TODD J. HUNTER

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IN EW L 2 VI IL K RE R E OV

1966: Despondent about American indifference to “River Deep,

Mountain High,” Phil Spector secretly went to work with an unknown duo in Denmark.As a sociopolitical statement, they galvanized the girl-group sound with fuzz pedals and songs about sex. Although they made an acetate, there were other, faster iconoclasts, and the album collected dust until 2003, when it was issued as Chain Gang of Love by The Raveonettes.

How Phil Spector really spent the rest of 1966 is anybody’s guess, but that bit of historical revisionism sums up the precursor to Pretty in Black, the new album by The Raveonettes.

This apple does not fall far from that tree.

Tracks three through five comprise the heart of the album.

Lead single “Love in a Trashcan” matches a twangy melody with an equally twangy “c’mon, baby” and a “let’s give it to ‘em right now” guitar solo. The best cut, “Sleepwalking,” bears a strong similarity to “Special K” by Placebo, which itself bears a strong similarity to “Mother's Little Helper” by The Rolling Stones.

A dark love song, “Sleepwalking” seemingly settles down, then churns on as an instrumental for almost another minute.

After another love song, the gorgeously world-weary

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"Uncertain Times," comes the car crash: a tepid cover of "My Boyfriend's Back" by The Angels. The lead vocal is aloof from start to finish, and nothing new is introduced.

If a cover was necessary, "Remember (Walkin' in the Sand)"

by The Shangri-Las would have been a better fit.

Goodness resumes with "Here Comes Mary," a morbid adaptation of "All I Have to Do Is Dream" by The Everly Brothers. "Twilight" and "You Say You Lie" are cool, trippy tracks that sandwich the even cooler "Somewhere in Texas," the one tune here to rekindle the smoky fire from Whip It On. "Ode to L.A." is an uncategorizable extravaganza not content just to revisit "Baby, I Love You" by The Ronettes, even if it evokes equally "This Magic Moment" by Jay & The Americans. It recruits a gratefully divorced Ronnie Spector (née Veronica Bennett) for a duet with Sharin Foo.The tribute is inventive and adds some sunshine to the album. The other celebrity guest of yesteryear is Moe Tucker of The Velvet Underground, who plays drums on "Ode to L.A." and three other tracks.

The original material is solid, and the harmonies hypnotic. Except where The Raveonettes paint by numbers, Sune Rose Wagner and Sharin Foo adeptly rewrite American rock ‘n’ roll history through their Scandinavian perspective. Pretty in Black may not improve upon previous work but is a most welcome extension of their catalogue.

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PHOTOS • COURTESY OF JEANNINE BESTOSO

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I HEAR IF YOU SHOUT “DAVE MATTHEWS” THREE TIMES, HE’LL APPEAR.

Artistry in Wood [Fine furniture and decorative objects by Jeff Boshart, Charleston; Stephen Chrisman, Danville; David Griffin, Charleston; Kurt Henigman, Champaign; Myron Kates, Urbana; Tim LaTourette, Fayetteville, AR; Dwain Naragon, Westfield; Thomas Skaggs, Champaign; John and Charlie Sweitzer, Champaign. And an ongoing display of work by 42 Illinois artists.]

Cinema Gallery through July 2 Tue-Sat 10am-4pm Out Of Site [featuring paintings by Ann McDowell, and mixed media by Josh Ipple and ceramics by Geoff Bant, Linda Dumich, Linda Weiner, and Sara Redd] Springer Cultural Center through June 4 Mon-Fri 8am-9pm, Sat 9am-5pm, Sun 12-5 pm

The work of Mark Reutter is on display at Creation Art Studios.

Beneath The Surface [Featuring paintings

by Richard Benoit and works in glass by Barrie Bredemeier] Verde Gallery through July 2 Tue-Sat: 7am-10pm Cafe; 12-10pm Gallery Digital Media Student Juried Exhibition [The annual student-juried exhibitions serve as a collection of the best student work for the current academic year]

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Parkland Art Gallery through June 16 Mon-Thu 10am-2pm, Tue-Thu 6-8pm Not Enough Space [An international touring exhibit marking the 25th anniversary of the incarceration of two Puerto Rican political prisoners, Oscar López Rivera and Carlos Alberto Torres, in U.S. federal facilities] UIUC Main Library, first floor, 1408 West Gregory Drive, Urbana Spring 2005 Art Exhibition [work by Jeannine Bestoso, Melissa Mitchell, Mark Reutter, Amy Richardson, and Wesley Waters] Creation Art Studios and Gallery through June 5 Hours: Tue-Fri 1-5:30pm, Sat 1-4pm and by appointment, 344-6955, www.creationartstudios.com Centennial High School Student Art Show [For this unique display, the students in artist and educator Shannon Batman's class have created wonderfully expressive self-portraits. The students were inspired by a variety of artists including Frida Kahlo.

The framing for this show was partially funded by a Tepper Grant awarded to instructor Shannon Batman.]

Pages For All Ages through May 31 Mon-Thu 9am-10pm, Fri-Sat 9am-11pm, Sun 10am-9pm Invisible Infrastructure: Maps and Photographs [Works by Christian Sandvig and Hope Hall] Humanities Lecture Hall through July 22 805 W. Pennsylvania Ave, www.iprh.uiuc.edu Mon-Fri 8:30am-5pm Quantum Garden [original prints by Charles Segard] Aroma Cafe through June 4 Mon-Sun 7am-12am Mapping Sitting: On Portraiture and Photography [this exhibition ventures into uncharted territory with photographic and video installations and uses portraits by Arab photographers, including passport studio photographs, photo "surprise," itinerant photography, and group portraits to present a dynamic picture of the Middle East.

Organized by Walid Raad and Akram Zaatari.]

Krannert Art Museum through June 5.

Tue, Thu-Sat 9am-5pm, Wed 9am-8pm, Sun 25pm Suggested Donation: $3 Aroma Cafe is looking for artists to exhibit their work. If you are interested in exhibiting your art, please contact Amanda Bickel, art coordinator at Aroma Cafe at art4aroma@yahoo.com.

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14 • b u z z w e e k l y v e n u e s C H A M P A I G N

MEN, CHOCOLATE, AND COFFEE ARE ALL BETTER RICH.

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U R B A N A

ASSEMBLY HALL | First & Florida, Champaign 333-5000 AMERICAN LEGION POST 24 | 705 W Bloomington, Champaign 356-5144 AMERICAN LEGION POST 71 | 107 N Broadway, Urbana 367-3121 BARFLY | 120 N Neil, Champaign 352-9756 BOLTINI LOUNGE | 211 N Neil, Champaign 378-8001 BOARDMAN’S ART THEATER | 126 W Church, Champaign 351-0068 THE BRASS RAIL | 15 E University, Champaign 352-7512 THE BRIDGE | 124 W. White St. Champaign THE CANOPY CLUB (GARDEN GRILL) | 708 S Goodwin, Urbana 367-3140 CHANNING-MURRAY FOUNDATION | 1209 W Oregon, Urbana CIVITAS | 112 Main St., Urbana0 COURTYARD CAFE | Illini Union, 1401 W Green, Urbana 333-4666 COWBOY MONKEY | 6 Taylor, Champaign 398-2688 CURTIS ORCHARD | 3902 S Duncan, Champaign 359-5565 D.R. DIGGERS | 604 S Country Fair, Champaign 356-0888 ELMER’S CLUB 45 | 3525 N Cunningham, Urbana 344-3101 EMBASSY TAVERN & GRILL | 114 S Race, Urbana 384-9526 ESQUIRE LOUNGE | 106 N Walnut, Champaign 398-5858 FALLON’S ICE HOUSE | 703 N Prospect, Champaign 398-5760 FAT CITY SALOON | 505 S Chestnut, Champaign 356-7100 THE GREAT IMPASTA | 114 W Church, Champaign 359-7377 THE HIGHDIVE | 51 Main, Champaign 359-4444 HUBER’S | 1312 W Church, Champaign 352-0606 ILLINOIS DISCIPLES FOUNDATION | 610 E Springfield, Champaign 352-8721 INDEPENDENT MEDIA CENTER | 218 W Main, Urbana 344-8820 THE IRON POST | 120 S Race, Urbana 337-7678 JACKSON’S RIBS-N-TIPS| 116 N First, Champaign 355-2916 JOE’S BREWERY | 706 S Fifth, Champaign 384-1790 KRANNERT ART MUSEUM | 500 E Peabody, Champaign 333-1861 KRANNERT CENTER FOR THE PERFORMING ARTS | 500 S Goodwin, Urbana Tickets: 333-6280, 800-KCPATIX LA CASA CULTURAL LATINA | 1203 W Nevada, Urbana 333-4950

LAVA | 1906 W Bradley, Champaign 352-8714 LES’S LOUNGE | 403 N Coler, Urbana 328-4000 LINCOLN CASTLE | 209 S Broadway, Urbana 344-7720 MALIBU BAY LOUNGE | North Route 45, Urbana 328-7415 MIKE ‘N’ MOLLY’S | 105 N Market, Champaign 355-1236 NARGILE | 207 W Clark, Champaign NEIL STREET PUB | 1505 N Neil, Champaign 359-1601 THE OFFICE | 214 W Main, Urbana 344-7608 OPENSOURCE | 12 E. Washington,Champaign http://opensource.boxwith.com PARKLAND COLLEGE | 2400 W Bradley, Champaign 351-2528 PHOENIX | 215 S Neil, Champaign 355-7866 PIA’S OF RANTOUL | Route 136 E, Rantoul 893-8244 RED HERRING/CHANNING-MURRAY FOUNDATION | 1209 W Oregon, Urbana 344-1176 ROSE BOWL TAVERN | 106 N Race, Urbana 367-7031 SIDE BAR | 55 E. Main, Champaign 398-5760 SPRINGER CULTURAL CENTER | 301 N Randolph, Champaign 398-2376 SPURLOCK MUSEUM | 600 S Gregory, Urbana, 333-2360 THE STATION THEATRE | 223 N Broadway, Urbana 384-4000 STRAWBERRY FIELDS CAFE | 306 W Springfield, Urbana 328-1655 TK WENDL’S | 1901 S Highcross, Urbana 255-5328 TOMMY G’S | 123 S Mattis, Country Fair Shopping Center 359-2177 TONIC | 619 S Wright, Champaign 356-6768 TRACKS | 116 N Chestnut, Champaign 762-8116 UNIVERSITY YMCA | 1001 S Wright, Champaign 344-0721 URBANA CIVIC CENTER | 108 Water St., Urbana VERDE/VERDANT | 17 E Taylor, Champaign 366-3204 VIRGINIA THEATRE | 203 W Park Ave, Champaign 356-9053 WAKE THE DEAD CAFE | 1210 E. Eldorado St. Decatur 233-4525 WASHINGTON STREET PUB | 600 S. Washington, Tuscola 253-6850 WHITE HORSE INN | 112 1/2 E Green, Champaign 352-5945 ZORBA’S | 627 E Green, Champaign 344-0710

thursday friday May 26 Live Music Andrew Dixon Jazz Quartet The Iron Post 7pm, TBA Acoustic Music Series: Rachel Brandstadter, Joanna Michal Aroma 8pm, free Jammin' Jimmy Bean Tommy G's 9pm, free The Weakdaze Cowboy Monkey 10pm, free Shovelrack White Horse Inn 10pm, free Caleb Rose Bowl Tavern 9pm, free Will Rogers Band Neil St. Pub 10pm-2am, free DJ DJ Jackson's Ribs-N-Tips 8pm, TBA DJ J-Phlip [house] Barfly 10pm, free DJ Bozak Boltini 10:30pm, free Karaoke "G" Force Karaoke Pia's of Rantoul 9pm-1am, free Dancing UIUC Swing Society McKinley Foundation 9:30pm-12am, free Fitness Belly Dance for Fitness The Fitness Center Champaign 8pm, $7-$9 Belly Dance for Fitness Gold’s Gym, Champaign 7:30pm, $7-$9 Yoga for Beginners Ananda Liina Spiritual Community 5:30, free Wine Tasting Krannert Uncorked Krannert Art Center Lobby 5pm, free Lectures, Meetings, Workshops Tyler’s Toast [Tyler teaches participants to make out-ofthe-ordinary foods with no fuss and lots of flavor. Learn to cook with less fat while maintaining taste and texture. Each month brings a new and exciting menu of multicultural fare aimed at tempting taste buds and inspiring home cooks to expand their horizons.]

Mettler Center, 6:30pm, $15/member, $20/non

May 27 Live Music Country Connection Rose Bowl Tavern 9pm, $1 Eclectic Theory The White Horse Inn 10pm, free Jazz Happy Hour: Ear Doctor Mike 'n Molly's 5-7pm, $3 Jeff Helgesen Quintet The Iron Post 5-7pm, TBA The Prairie Dogs Tommy G's 5pm, free Music Among the Vines: The Painkillers [blues] Alto Vineyards 6pm, $3 Red Cloud, Pladough, DJ Wise, J-remy [Christian hip hop] Wake the Dead Cafe 6pm, $7.50/advance, $10/door Albert Flasher Tommy G's 10pm, cover Reasonable Doubt [rock] Tracks 9-pm-12am Will Rogers Band Neil St. Pub 10pm-2am, $3 DJ DJ Mighty Dog Jackson's Ribs-N-Tips 9pm-2am, TBA DJ Bozak [hip hop, downtempo] Barfly 10pm, free DJ Tim Williams [top 40/hip hop/house/dance] The Highdive 10:30pm, $5 DJ Elise Boltini 6-10pm, free World Wide Wave: Mambo Italiano, DJ Bee Cowboy Monkey 9pm, free Dj J-Philp or DJ Lil Big Bass Boltini 10:30pm, free Karaoke "G" Force Karaoke American Legion Post 71 8pm-1am, free Special Events Midwest Games UIUC, starts at 12pm www.midwestgames2005.com

saturday

May 28 Live Music Rev. Robert

Hubers 8pm, free Will Rogers Band Neil St. Pub 10pm-2am, $3 Country Connection Rose Bowl Tavern 9pm, $1 Teen Battle of the Bands: Krash Type, Crown Frog, The Greytones, Mac and Ez, Dark Romm Notes, Right to Remain, 217 (Mid-West), H.O.T, True To Form, Epitaph Crystal Lake Park 3:30-9pm, free Nathanial K. Moore Memorial Day Weekend Benefit: Jammin' Jimmy Bean, Quad Remedy, JAB Tommy G's 4pm, TBA Desafinado Pages For All Ages 7pm, free Fabulous Motown Revue Virginia Theatre 7pm, $21-$23 Music Among the Vines: The Noisy Gators Alto Vineyards 7:30pm, $3 No Secret Band Rock's 8:30pm, TBA Candy Foster and Shades of Blue [blues/R&B/soul] Cowboy Monkey 9:30pm, $4 DJ DJ Mighty Dog Jackson's Ribs-N-Tips 9pm, TBA DJ Night Paulie's 9pm, free DJ Resonate [hip hop] Barfly 10pm, free DJ Mellow Fellow [hip hop/retro/R&B] Nargile 10pm, free DJ Tim Williams [top 40/hip hop/house/dance] The Highdive 10pm, $5 DJ Boltini 10:30pm, free DJ White Horse Inn 10pm, free Karaoke Liquid Courage Karaoke Geovanti's 9pm-1am, free Kids Storytime Pages for All Ages 11am, free Special Events Midwest Games UIUC, starts at 12pm www.midwestgames2005.com

I N T R O | A R O U N D T O W N | L I S T E N , H E A R | M A I N E V E N T | A R T S & E N T E R TA I N M E N T | T H E S I LV E R S C R E E N | T H E S T I N G E R | C L A S S I F I E D S

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sunday

May 29 Live Music The Crystal River Band Rose Bowl Tavern 9pm, free Liquid Courage Open Mic Night Geovanti's 8pm-12am, free Nathanial K. Moore Memorial Day Weekend Benefit: Jammin' Jimmy Bean, Autumn Zero Tommy G's 5pm, $5 Little Oye On the Prairie Cafe Paradiso

11am-1pm, free DJ DJ Wesjile [hip hop] Barfly 10pm, free Hit it Run 10 DJ Resonate, DJ J-Phlip, DJ Bozak, DJ Kosmo [old-school hip hop, dance] Cowboy Monkey, 9pm, free

monday

May 30 Live Music Chris and Jim [cover band] White Horse Inn 10pm, free Finga Lickin' The Office 10:30pm, free Jazz Jam with ParaDocs The Iron Post 8pm, TBA Ear Doctor Mike 'n Molly's 9pm, TBA Open Mic hosted by Brandon T. Washington Cowboy Monkey 10pm, free Quad Remedy Tommy G's 10pm, free DJ Ear Candy [house DJs] Nargile 9pm, free DJ Delayney [hip hop/soul] Barfly 10pm, free DJ Elise [deep sultry house] Boltini 10:30pm, free DJ Missus Mike 'n Molly's TBA Special Events Memorial Day Celebration [American Legion Post 559 will be honoring those comrades that have gone on to post everlasting.]

Lincoln Memorial Gardens, Urbana, 11am

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buzz weekly •

HEY RYAN ADAMS—THERE’S HAIR ON YOUR FACE!

Mofro Lochloosa Swampland Records

BY SUSAN SCHOMBURG

Although it’s been said that a band’s sound reflects the place they call home, it is rarely quite as audible as in the case of the North Florida-based band Mofro, whose funky blend of blues, soul, Southern rock, and yes, even a bit of country, is difficult to articulate. But when you hear it, you are struck with the way Mofro’s sound evokes the sights, smells, topography and climate of their home. Living up to the amusing, yet surprisingly apt, billing of the band as “Cheap-Ass Funk Straight off the Front Porch,” the duo that breathes heart and soul into Mofro is singer/multi-instrumentalist J.J. Grey and guitarist Daryl Hance.

Mofro’s music, unlike many groups that are part of the more mainstream music industry today, is nothing if not sincere. It is music with heart and social—and especially environmental—consciousness and makes one realize what has been missing from much of the music industry today.The lyrics and music are woven so tightly together that one cannot separate the two.

When listening to Lochloosa, the group’s second album, one is liable to be struck with the versatility of the group’s sound, which presents a range of song types and grooves while still somehow managing to form a coherent, no-nonsense sonic fingerprint. Incidentally, this sound is both original but familiar, bringing to mind any number of other groups in the swamprock genre, but sounding like none of them. The almost tactile quality of their music is slightly disorienting when it first hits the ear, and the album takes repeated listenings to let the band’s sound and style seep into one’s skin, but well worth the effort.

Hance’s slide guitar permeates the album, creating atmosphere that supports and enhances the mood of each track without ever quite stepping into the spotlight. It is the closest one can come to having an example of the “strong, silent type” translated into music, and the songs on the album would be

sound ground #77

diminished without them. The haunting slide playing on “Ten Thousand Islands” stands out as particularly beautiful, and is complemented by Grey on harmonica.

Grey’s vocals, like many other aspects of this group’s sound, take some getting used to; they are simultaneously too gritty and too polished to make sense outside of the context of the band’s sound. The warm, sweet-yet-melancholy vocals on the title track are those of a lover, and he absolutely wails by the end, belting out the words from the depths of his being.

The more introspective tracks on the album are balanced by ones that are just good, plain fun. The infectious groove the band lays down on “Six Ways From Sunday” and the gruff, humorous funk of “Dirtfloorcracker” make it next to impossible not to get up and simply move to the music.

Their music is real, their music is organic, their music is simple and honest, and yes, even a bit sentimental. Simply put, Mofro’s music is sonic proof that there really is no place like home.

Mofro will be appearing this Saturday, May 28 at 5 p.m. on the Sunshine Stage at Three Sisters Park as part of the Summer Camp 2005 Music Festival in Chillicothe, Ill.

music

2. this week in music

TODD J. HUNTER • STAFF WRITER

A

nd the radio man says, “Rock ‘n’ roll lives!”

Honorary Champaign-Urbana band Kissinger (now neighbors of Solips in Austin,Texas) will be back here June 9 at Cowboy Monkey.The special occasion is a release show for Me and Otto, the second full-length Kissinger release, and Green Light Go opens. Show time is 10:30 p.m., and cover is $3.

Kissinger last played here Sept. 16 with JigGsaw but stayed another day and saw Terminus Victor. Kissinger made three tour stops here the year prior. March 18, Kissinger won the title of 2005 Austin Music Foundation Incubator Band, which comes with a $15,000 recording budget. Kissinger also appear May 29 at Schubas in Chicago with The Like Young (ex-Wolfie) and Mike Downey of The New Constitution. Show time is 8 p.m., and cover is $10 ($8 in advance).

Green Light Go have news of their own, some sad. Bassist Mike Daab (also of Grand Poobah) is moving to Indianapolis but will go on with the band. Guitarist and co-founder Darin Smith, however, has announced his departure in order to concentrate on a teaching career. A four-state tour starts tomorrow night at Lemmons in St. Louis, and Nik Allen of Pulsar47 will fill in for Smith.

May 24,The Like Young officially issued The Timid EP, a vinyl-only three-track. The show with Kissinger and Mike Downey is the last on the horizon; Joe and Amanda Ziemba will spend all summer practicing and recording songs for album number three. The recording will begin in August at Key Club Studio.Writes Amanda:“As much as we would love to be back out ASAP, it won’t be happening until our next full-length is released.When that hits the streets, so will we.”

Tonight at 8, as part of its acoustic music series, Aroma presents Rachel Brandstadter and Joanna Michal. Brandstadter is a guitarist-vocalist for Cameo Turret, and Michal is a singersongwriter who recently released a six-track EP, Impostor, available at Exile on Main Street.At 11:30 p.m.,The Weakdaze will play across the street at Cowboy Monkey.

Saturday afternoon at Crystal Lake Park, UrbanaTeens.com hosts its first annual Teen Battle of the Bands. Live performance launches at 3:50 with Epitaph for an Enemy, then continues through 8:50 with True to Form, H.O.T., 217, Right to Remain, Dark Room Notes, Mac & Ez, The Greytones, Crown Frog and Krash Type 17. In August, the winner will play on the main stage of the Illinois State Fair, and the top three bands will play at the Urbana Sweetcorn Festival. Saturday night at 7, in Savoy, bossa nova cooperative Desafinado returns to Steep & Brew, the coffee nook at Pages for All Ages.There is no cover for these shows today and Saturday.

All of a sudden,“The Void” mysteriously looks less like a house basement and more like The Canopy Club.Wednesday night, in the second installment of a summer concert series, The Void/The Canopy Club spotlight The Living Blue, Tractor Kings and The Situation. Show time is 9 p.m., and cover is $5. May 17, The Living Blue opened for seminal glam-rock group New York Dolls at the Metro in Chicago.

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Todd J. Hunter hosts WEFT Sessions and Champaign Local 901, two hours of live local music every Monday night at 10 on 90.1 FM. Send news to soundground@excite.com.

11

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BURLY

Excellent singer-songwriter Jonathan Richman (Modern Lovers not included) will play 22 shows this June, completely bypassing Chicago and instead sticking to the land he loves, the East Coast. He will, however, be making an appearance in St. Louis at Blueberry Hill on June 23.

Frankie Poullain, bassist of popular glam-rock revival band The Darkness, has announced his exit of the group. According to British newspaper The Sun, “Tensions grew during recording sessions in Wales over Frankie’s mind being elsewhere. Frankie felt he had done all he could and decided to retire to the French countryside.”

Jenny Lewis, lead singer of Rilo Kiley, and also possibly my best friend if I ever got to meet her, will release a solo album entitled Rabbit Fur Coat to be released by Conor Oberst´s (of Bright Eyes) label sometime by January. “It’s pretty strippeddown, kind of rootsy at times. In the end, it shaped up to be this weird, loose gospel-y record,” she said of the album.

U2 megalomaniac Bono reportably told Chicago Tribune music critic Greg Kot that that the band is interested in rerecording 1997 LP Pop. Bono blames the impending tour (booked by the band’s manager) for what he sees as low quality, but he feels the potential is for something better. I guess not all the past is viewed through rose-tinted glasses.

Dancepunks and British Big-beat DJs rejoice!

DFA Records and Astralwerks have announced a partnership, meaning that Astralwerks will be carrying, among other things, Juan Maclean’s Less Than Human. Hopefully it’ll be better than Daft Punk’s disappointing, more-mortal Human After All, released on Astralwerks this year.

w H at tH e He L L? MOMENT OF THE WEEK Kylie Minogue recently announced that she has been diagnosed with breast cancer, and her Australian tour dates will have to be rescheduled. This announcement on her Web site caused a sheer torrent of fans to visit the site, and promptly overload the server. We send Kylie our best wishes.

I N T R O | A R O U N D T O W N | L I S T E N , H E A R | M A I N E V E N T | A R T S & E N T E R TA I N M E N T | T H E S I LV E R S C R E E N | T H E S T I N G E R | C L A S S I F I E D S

13 Summer Series in C-U

James Branch Cabell • Author

A WOMAN’S FUND TEEN BATTLE OF THE BANDS

Saturday, May 28, Crystal Lake Park, free

3:50 4:20 4:50 5:20 5:50 6:20 6:50 7:20 7:50 8:20

-

4:20 4:50 5:20 5:50 6:20 6:50 7:20 7:50 8:20 8:50

In a town like Champaign-Urbana that is dominated by a large university, a great deal of entertainment outlets are geared toward college-aged people and thus the vast majority of music venues have an age limit of 18 or 19 years old. A setup like this sadly leaves one demographic out in the cold.

There are almost 20,000 teens between the ages of 15 and 19 in Champaign County, and their outlets for entertainment and self-expression are limited as compared to what is available for people just a few years older. The Urbana Park District has created a program to fill this void called UrbanaTeens.com which includes many workshops, classes and events geared toward teens. One of these is the Teen Battle of Bands at Crystal Lake Park.

pm pm pm pm pm pm pm pm pm pm

Epitaph for an Enemy from Champaign (rock) True to Form from Champaign (alternative) H.O.T. from Champaign (alternative) 217 (Mid-wes) from Urbana (hip-hop/rap) Right to Remain from Dekalb (metal) Dark Room Notes from St. Joseph (alternative) Mac & Ez from Champaign (hip-hop/rap) The Greytones from Champaign (alternative) Crown Frog from Champaign (rock) Krash Type 17 from Gibson City (punk)

math. RCS trains advocates to meet victims at the hospital, explain their rights, offer a change of clothes and return their sense of control. Both organizations also staff a 24hour confidential sexual and domestic violence hotline.

Get Active

buzz pick

PHOTO • COURTESY OF WWW.AWOMANSFUND.ORG

This show features 10 bands hailing from Urbana, Champaign, St. Joseph, Dekalb and Gibson City.

The bands will be judged by Ian Goldberg, the owner of the Canopy Club and a DJ from WPGU. The first-, second- and third-place bands will all win a slot playing at the Urbana Sweet Corn Festival in August. The second-place winner will advance to the regional competition in Peoria. The first-place winner will advance directly to the statewide competition that will take place on the main stage at the Illinois State Fair.

Come to Crystal Lake Park on Saturday afternoon to check out some of Illinois’ finest young talent.

The goal of A Woman’s Fund and Rape Crisis Services is to end violence against women and children through education and issue-awareness of the issues. Both foundations are grass-roots, not-for-profit organizations that believe involvement and advocacy are the best ways to stop sexual and domestic violence.

AWF offers adults and children who are victims of domestic violence a safe and healthy environment to reclaim their lives.

They provide counseling, legal advice, transitional housing and other resources to give victims the knowledge to make their own decisions. RCS works with victims of sexual violence to help them get through the traumatizing experience and deal with the after-

A Woman’s Fund and Rape Crisis Services are always looking for volunteers to help fill any of the organization’s many needs.

Besides training to be a sexual violence victim advocate or manning the hotline, professional and administrative services are needed too. You can volunteer to change oil on a resident’s car, or style their hair and do makeup if that’s more your thing.

Or you can work in the office answering phones, doing inventory of donated goods and other clerical work. People are also needed to assist with the routine handy work needed around the building such as painting, landscaping and simple repairs. If you like animals, volunteer as a foster fur parent and care for a victim’s pet while they seek help in a shelter that doesn’t allow animals. RCS and AWF have a space for you nomatter how you want to help out.

Visit www.awomansfund.org, call the office at (217) 384-4462, or stop by 501 W. Church in Champaign (on the corner of Elm and Church) for more information and to see what you can do to help out.

–Erin Scottberg

Summertime in C-U isn’t only less people and better specials at the bars. There’s good music, too. Take the time to grab a drink, hear live music and relax in a beer garden at one of Champaign-Urbana’s fine establishments.

Zorba’s long-running Thursday jazz series continues through summer, with a few breaks. June 30, the Greek restaurant by day turned jazz lounge at night hosts Hot Club D’Urbana, and July 21 brings Hippus Campus.

Verdant Gallery is home to the Acoustic Fusion Concert Series.

Friday, June 3, it’s the duo of Typhanie Monique and Neil Alger with a $5 cover. Tuesday nights are Bluegrass Jam night. Musicians of all levels, from amateur to professional, are invited to bring an instrument and jam in the gallery. Come and play or sit and listen. Either way is free and all you have to do is show up.

Aroma continues its Acoustic Music Series throughout summer.

Tonight is a free show with Rachel Brandstadter and Joanna Michal.

Every Wednesday, stop by The Canopy for Urbana Booking Co.’s “In The Void.” This Wednesday, it’s The Living Blue with Tractor Kings.

World Wide Wave is free at Cowboy Monkey on Fridays at 9 p.m., with house and world music from Mambo Italiano and DJ Bee. Music Among The Vines is hosted

by Alto Vineyards. This Friday, check out blues from The Painkillers, and Saturday, Cajun band The Noisy Gators appear. Both shows are $3.

More blues, rock and jazz are on the way throughout the summer.

Sundays and Tuesdays, the Rosebowl Tavern hosts Crystal River, a country and rock cover band. The music’s good, the drinks flow, and you may just find yourself doing the electric slide and reaching for a cowboy hat.

Mike N’ Molly’s will welcome jazz acts in their sun-struck beer garden Fridays 5-7 p.m. this summer. This Friday it’s the inscrutable Ear Doctor.

All shows have a $3 cover.

PHOTOS • DAVID SOLANA

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buzz pick

The OPTIMIST proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds; and the PESSIMIST fears this is true.

Joni Laurence performs May 5, at Aroma Cafe, 118 N. Neil St., Champaign.

Puzzle

pg.21

–Kyle Gorman and Erin Scottberg

Remember Everything that Happened this Year?...

-World Series -Presidential Election -Unofficial St. Patrick’s Day -The Riots on Green Street -Awesome Illini Sports All of these memories and more are featured in the 2004-2005 yearbook.

In addition, any Illio Yearbook purchased before June 1, 2005 will contain an additional Illini Basketball supplement featuring their amazing season and their trip to the Championship Game.

Call 337-8300 or mail in the order form below to reserve your copy today.

–Cassie Conner

I N T R O | A R O U N D T O W N | L I S T E N , H E A R | M A I N E V E N T | A R T S & E N T E R TA I N M E N T | W I N E & D I N E | T H E S I LV E R S C R E E N | C L A S S I F I E D S

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I N T R O | A R O U N D T O W N | L I S T E N , H E A R | M A I N E V E N T | A R T S & E N T E R TA I N M E N T | W I N E & D I N E | T H E S I LV E R S C R E E N | C L A S S I F I E D S

13 Summer Series in C-U

James Branch Cabell • Author

A WOMAN’S FUND TEEN BATTLE OF THE BANDS

Saturday, May 28, Crystal Lake Park, free

3:50 4:20 4:50 5:20 5:50 6:20 6:50 7:20 7:50 8:20

-

4:20 4:50 5:20 5:50 6:20 6:50 7:20 7:50 8:20 8:50

In a town like Champaign-Urbana that is dominated by a large university, a great deal of entertainment outlets are geared toward college-aged people and thus the vast majority of music venues have an age limit of 18 or 19 years old. A setup like this sadly leaves one demographic out in the cold.

There are almost 20,000 teens between the ages of 15 and 19 in Champaign County, and their outlets for entertainment and self-expression are limited as compared to what is available for people just a few years older. The Urbana Park District has created a program to fill this void called UrbanaTeens.com which includes many workshops, classes and events geared toward teens. One of these is the Teen Battle of Bands at Crystal Lake Park.

pm pm pm pm pm pm pm pm pm pm

Epitaph for an Enemy from Champaign (rock) True to Form from Champaign (alternative) H.O.T. from Champaign (alternative) 217 (Mid-wes) from Urbana (hip-hop/rap) Right to Remain from Dekalb (metal) Dark Room Notes from St. Joseph (alternative) Mac & Ez from Champaign (hip-hop/rap) The Greytones from Champaign (alternative) Crown Frog from Champaign (rock) Krash Type 17 from Gibson City (punk)

math. RCS trains advocates to meet victims at the hospital, explain their rights, offer a change of clothes and return their sense of control. Both organizations also staff a 24hour confidential sexual and domestic violence hotline.

Get Active

buzz pick

PHOTO • COURTESY OF WWW.AWOMANSFUND.ORG

This show features 10 bands hailing from Urbana, Champaign, St. Joseph, Dekalb and Gibson City.

The bands will be judged by Ian Goldberg, the owner of the Canopy Club and a DJ from WPGU. The first-, second- and third-place bands will all win a slot playing at the Urbana Sweet Corn Festival in August. The second-place winner will advance to the regional competition in Peoria. The first-place winner will advance directly to the statewide competition that will take place on the main stage at the Illinois State Fair.

Come to Crystal Lake Park on Saturday afternoon to check out some of Illinois’ finest young talent.

The goal of A Woman’s Fund and Rape Crisis Services is to end violence against women and children through education and issue-awareness of the issues. Both foundations are grass-roots, not-for-profit organizations that believe involvement and advocacy are the best ways to stop sexual and domestic violence.

AWF offers adults and children who are victims of domestic violence a safe and healthy environment to reclaim their lives.

They provide counseling, legal advice, transitional housing and other resources to give victims the knowledge to make their own decisions. RCS works with victims of sexual violence to help them get through the traumatizing experience and deal with the after-

A Woman’s Fund and Rape Crisis Services are always looking for volunteers to help fill any of the organization’s many needs.

Besides training to be a sexual violence victim advocate or manning the hotline, professional and administrative services are needed too. You can volunteer to change oil on a resident’s car, or style their hair and do makeup if that’s more your thing.

Or you can work in the office answering phones, doing inventory of donated goods and other clerical work. People are also needed to assist with the routine handy work needed around the building such as painting, landscaping and simple repairs. If you like animals, volunteer as a foster fur parent and care for a victim’s pet while they seek help in a shelter that doesn’t allow animals. RCS and AWF have a space for you nomatter how you want to help out.

Visit www.awomansfund.org, call the office at (217) 384-4462, or stop by 501 W. Church in Champaign (on the corner of Elm and Church) for more information and to see what you can do to help out.

–Erin Scottberg

Summertime in C-U isn’t only less people and better specials at the bars. There’s good music, too. Take the time to grab a drink, hear live music and relax in a beer garden at one of Champaign-Urbana’s fine establishments.

Zorba’s long-running Thursday jazz series continues through summer, with a few breaks. June 30, the Greek restaurant by day turned jazz lounge at night hosts Hot Club D’Urbana, and July 21 brings Hippus Campus.

Verdant Gallery is home to the Acoustic Fusion Concert Series.

Friday, June 3, it’s the duo of Typhanie Monique and Neil Alger with a $5 cover. Tuesday nights are Bluegrass Jam night. Musicians of all levels, from amateur to professional, are invited to bring an instrument and jam in the gallery. Come and play or sit and listen. Either way is free and all you have to do is show up.

Aroma continues its Acoustic Music Series throughout summer.

Tonight is a free show with Rachel Brandstadter and Joanna Michal.

Every Wednesday, stop by The Canopy for Urbana Booking Co.’s “In The Void.” This Wednesday, it’s The Living Blue with Tractor Kings.

World Wide Wave is free at Cowboy Monkey on Fridays at 9 p.m., with house and world music from Mambo Italiano and DJ Bee. Music Among The Vines is hosted

by Alto Vineyards. This Friday, check out blues from The Painkillers, and Saturday, Cajun band The Noisy Gators appear. Both shows are $3.

More blues, rock and jazz are on the way throughout the summer.

Sundays and Tuesdays, the Rosebowl Tavern hosts Crystal River, a country and rock cover band. The music’s good, the drinks flow, and you may just find yourself doing the electric slide and reaching for a cowboy hat.

Mike N’ Molly’s will welcome jazz acts in their sun-struck beer garden Fridays 5-7 p.m. this summer. This Friday it’s the inscrutable Ear Doctor.

All shows have a $3 cover.

PHOTOS • DAVID SOLANA

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buzz pick

The OPTIMIST proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds; and the PESSIMIST fears this is true.

Joni Laurence performs May 5, at Aroma Cafe, 118 N. Neil St., Champaign.

Puzzle

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–Kyle Gorman and Erin Scottberg

Remember Everything that Happened this Year?...

-World Series -Presidential Election -Unofficial St. Patrick’s Day -The Riots on Green Street -Awesome Illini Sports All of these memories and more are featured in the 2004-2005 yearbook.

In addition, any Illio Yearbook purchased before June 1, 2005 will contain an additional Illini Basketball supplement featuring their amazing season and their trip to the Championship Game.

Call 337-8300 or mail in the order form below to reserve your copy today.

–Cassie Conner

I N T R O | A R O U N D T O W N | L I S T E N , H E A R | M A I N E V E N T | A R T S & E N T E R TA I N M E N T | W I N E & D I N E | T H E S I LV E R S C R E E N | C L A S S I F I E D S

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14 • b u z z w e e k l y v e n u e s C H A M P A I G N

MEN, CHOCOLATE, AND COFFEE ARE ALL BETTER RICH.

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U R B A N A

ASSEMBLY HALL | First & Florida, Champaign 333-5000 AMERICAN LEGION POST 24 | 705 W Bloomington, Champaign 356-5144 AMERICAN LEGION POST 71 | 107 N Broadway, Urbana 367-3121 BARFLY | 120 N Neil, Champaign 352-9756 BOLTINI LOUNGE | 211 N Neil, Champaign 378-8001 BOARDMAN’S ART THEATER | 126 W Church, Champaign 351-0068 THE BRASS RAIL | 15 E University, Champaign 352-7512 THE BRIDGE | 124 W. White St. Champaign THE CANOPY CLUB (GARDEN GRILL) | 708 S Goodwin, Urbana 367-3140 CHANNING-MURRAY FOUNDATION | 1209 W Oregon, Urbana CIVITAS | 112 Main St., Urbana0 COURTYARD CAFE | Illini Union, 1401 W Green, Urbana 333-4666 COWBOY MONKEY | 6 Taylor, Champaign 398-2688 CURTIS ORCHARD | 3902 S Duncan, Champaign 359-5565 D.R. DIGGERS | 604 S Country Fair, Champaign 356-0888 ELMER’S CLUB 45 | 3525 N Cunningham, Urbana 344-3101 EMBASSY TAVERN & GRILL | 114 S Race, Urbana 384-9526 ESQUIRE LOUNGE | 106 N Walnut, Champaign 398-5858 FALLON’S ICE HOUSE | 703 N Prospect, Champaign 398-5760 FAT CITY SALOON | 505 S Chestnut, Champaign 356-7100 THE GREAT IMPASTA | 114 W Church, Champaign 359-7377 THE HIGHDIVE | 51 Main, Champaign 359-4444 HUBER’S | 1312 W Church, Champaign 352-0606 ILLINOIS DISCIPLES FOUNDATION | 610 E Springfield, Champaign 352-8721 INDEPENDENT MEDIA CENTER | 218 W Main, Urbana 344-8820 THE IRON POST | 120 S Race, Urbana 337-7678 JACKSON’S RIBS-N-TIPS| 116 N First, Champaign 355-2916 JOE’S BREWERY | 706 S Fifth, Champaign 384-1790 KRANNERT ART MUSEUM | 500 E Peabody, Champaign 333-1861 KRANNERT CENTER FOR THE PERFORMING ARTS | 500 S Goodwin, Urbana Tickets: 333-6280, 800-KCPATIX LA CASA CULTURAL LATINA | 1203 W Nevada, Urbana 333-4950

LAVA | 1906 W Bradley, Champaign 352-8714 LES’S LOUNGE | 403 N Coler, Urbana 328-4000 LINCOLN CASTLE | 209 S Broadway, Urbana 344-7720 MALIBU BAY LOUNGE | North Route 45, Urbana 328-7415 MIKE ‘N’ MOLLY’S | 105 N Market, Champaign 355-1236 NARGILE | 207 W Clark, Champaign NEIL STREET PUB | 1505 N Neil, Champaign 359-1601 THE OFFICE | 214 W Main, Urbana 344-7608 OPENSOURCE | 12 E. Washington,Champaign http://opensource.boxwith.com PARKLAND COLLEGE | 2400 W Bradley, Champaign 351-2528 PHOENIX | 215 S Neil, Champaign 355-7866 PIA’S OF RANTOUL | Route 136 E, Rantoul 893-8244 RED HERRING/CHANNING-MURRAY FOUNDATION | 1209 W Oregon, Urbana 344-1176 ROSE BOWL TAVERN | 106 N Race, Urbana 367-7031 SIDE BAR | 55 E. Main, Champaign 398-5760 SPRINGER CULTURAL CENTER | 301 N Randolph, Champaign 398-2376 SPURLOCK MUSEUM | 600 S Gregory, Urbana, 333-2360 THE STATION THEATRE | 223 N Broadway, Urbana 384-4000 STRAWBERRY FIELDS CAFE | 306 W Springfield, Urbana 328-1655 TK WENDL’S | 1901 S Highcross, Urbana 255-5328 TOMMY G’S | 123 S Mattis, Country Fair Shopping Center 359-2177 TONIC | 619 S Wright, Champaign 356-6768 TRACKS | 116 N Chestnut, Champaign 762-8116 UNIVERSITY YMCA | 1001 S Wright, Champaign 344-0721 URBANA CIVIC CENTER | 108 Water St., Urbana VERDE/VERDANT | 17 E Taylor, Champaign 366-3204 VIRGINIA THEATRE | 203 W Park Ave, Champaign 356-9053 WAKE THE DEAD CAFE | 1210 E. Eldorado St. Decatur 233-4525 WASHINGTON STREET PUB | 600 S. Washington, Tuscola 253-6850 WHITE HORSE INN | 112 1/2 E Green, Champaign 352-5945 ZORBA’S | 627 E Green, Champaign 344-0710

thursday friday May 26 Live Music Andrew Dixon Jazz Quartet The Iron Post 7pm, TBA Acoustic Music Series: Rachel Brandstadter, Joanna Michal Aroma 8pm, free Jammin' Jimmy Bean Tommy G's 9pm, free The Weakdaze Cowboy Monkey 10pm, free Shovelrack White Horse Inn 10pm, free Caleb Rose Bowl Tavern 9pm, free Will Rogers Band Neil St. Pub 10pm-2am, free DJ DJ Jackson's Ribs-N-Tips 8pm, TBA DJ J-Phlip [house] Barfly 10pm, free DJ Bozak Boltini 10:30pm, free Karaoke "G" Force Karaoke Pia's of Rantoul 9pm-1am, free Dancing UIUC Swing Society McKinley Foundation 9:30pm-12am, free Fitness Belly Dance for Fitness The Fitness Center Champaign 8pm, $7-$9 Belly Dance for Fitness Gold’s Gym, Champaign 7:30pm, $7-$9 Yoga for Beginners Ananda Liina Spiritual Community 5:30, free Wine Tasting Krannert Uncorked Krannert Art Center Lobby 5pm, free Lectures, Meetings, Workshops Tyler’s Toast [Tyler teaches participants to make out-ofthe-ordinary foods with no fuss and lots of flavor. Learn to cook with less fat while maintaining taste and texture. Each month brings a new and exciting menu of multicultural fare aimed at tempting taste buds and inspiring home cooks to expand their horizons.]

Mettler Center, 6:30pm, $15/member, $20/non

May 27 Live Music Country Connection Rose Bowl Tavern 9pm, $1 Eclectic Theory The White Horse Inn 10pm, free Jazz Happy Hour: Ear Doctor Mike 'n Molly's 5-7pm, $3 Jeff Helgesen Quintet The Iron Post 5-7pm, TBA The Prairie Dogs Tommy G's 5pm, free Music Among the Vines: The Painkillers [blues] Alto Vineyards 6pm, $3 Red Cloud, Pladough, DJ Wise, J-remy [Christian hip hop] Wake the Dead Cafe 6pm, $7.50/advance, $10/door Albert Flasher Tommy G's 10pm, cover Reasonable Doubt [rock] Tracks 9-pm-12am Will Rogers Band Neil St. Pub 10pm-2am, $3 DJ DJ Mighty Dog Jackson's Ribs-N-Tips 9pm-2am, TBA DJ Bozak [hip hop, downtempo] Barfly 10pm, free DJ Tim Williams [top 40/hip hop/house/dance] The Highdive 10:30pm, $5 DJ Elise Boltini 6-10pm, free World Wide Wave: Mambo Italiano, DJ Bee Cowboy Monkey 9pm, free Dj J-Philp or DJ Lil Big Bass Boltini 10:30pm, free Karaoke "G" Force Karaoke American Legion Post 71 8pm-1am, free Special Events Midwest Games UIUC, starts at 12pm www.midwestgames2005.com

saturday

May 28 Live Music Rev. Robert

Hubers 8pm, free Will Rogers Band Neil St. Pub 10pm-2am, $3 Country Connection Rose Bowl Tavern 9pm, $1 Teen Battle of the Bands: Krash Type, Crown Frog, The Greytones, Mac and Ez, Dark Romm Notes, Right to Remain, 217 (Mid-West), H.O.T, True To Form, Epitaph Crystal Lake Park 3:30-9pm, free Nathanial K. Moore Memorial Day Weekend Benefit: Jammin' Jimmy Bean, Quad Remedy, JAB Tommy G's 4pm, TBA Desafinado Pages For All Ages 7pm, free Fabulous Motown Revue Virginia Theatre 7pm, $21-$23 Music Among the Vines: The Noisy Gators Alto Vineyards 7:30pm, $3 No Secret Band Rock's 8:30pm, TBA Candy Foster and Shades of Blue [blues/R&B/soul] Cowboy Monkey 9:30pm, $4 DJ DJ Mighty Dog Jackson's Ribs-N-Tips 9pm, TBA DJ Night Paulie's 9pm, free DJ Resonate [hip hop] Barfly 10pm, free DJ Mellow Fellow [hip hop/retro/R&B] Nargile 10pm, free DJ Tim Williams [top 40/hip hop/house/dance] The Highdive 10pm, $5 DJ Boltini 10:30pm, free DJ White Horse Inn 10pm, free Karaoke Liquid Courage Karaoke Geovanti's 9pm-1am, free Kids Storytime Pages for All Ages 11am, free Special Events Midwest Games UIUC, starts at 12pm www.midwestgames2005.com

I N T R O | A R O U N D T O W N | L I S T E N , H E A R | M A I N E V E N T | A R T S & E N T E R TA I N M E N T | T H E S I LV E R S C R E E N | T H E S T I N G E R | C L A S S I F I E D S

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May 29 Live Music The Crystal River Band Rose Bowl Tavern 9pm, free Liquid Courage Open Mic Night Geovanti's 8pm-12am, free Nathanial K. Moore Memorial Day Weekend Benefit: Jammin' Jimmy Bean, Autumn Zero Tommy G's 5pm, $5 Little Oye On the Prairie Cafe Paradiso

11am-1pm, free DJ DJ Wesjile [hip hop] Barfly 10pm, free Hit it Run 10 DJ Resonate, DJ J-Phlip, DJ Bozak, DJ Kosmo [old-school hip hop, dance] Cowboy Monkey, 9pm, free

monday

May 30 Live Music Chris and Jim [cover band] White Horse Inn 10pm, free Finga Lickin' The Office 10:30pm, free Jazz Jam with ParaDocs The Iron Post 8pm, TBA Ear Doctor Mike 'n Molly's 9pm, TBA Open Mic hosted by Brandon T. Washington Cowboy Monkey 10pm, free Quad Remedy Tommy G's 10pm, free DJ Ear Candy [house DJs] Nargile 9pm, free DJ Delayney [hip hop/soul] Barfly 10pm, free DJ Elise [deep sultry house] Boltini 10:30pm, free DJ Missus Mike 'n Molly's TBA Special Events Memorial Day Celebration [American Legion Post 559 will be honoring those comrades that have gone on to post everlasting.]

Lincoln Memorial Gardens, Urbana, 11am

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HEY RYAN ADAMS—THERE’S HAIR ON YOUR FACE!

Mofro Lochloosa Swampland Records

BY SUSAN SCHOMBURG

Although it’s been said that a band’s sound reflects the place they call home, it is rarely quite as audible as in the case of the North Florida-based band Mofro, whose funky blend of blues, soul, Southern rock, and yes, even a bit of country, is difficult to articulate. But when you hear it, you are struck with the way Mofro’s sound evokes the sights, smells, topography and climate of their home. Living up to the amusing, yet surprisingly apt, billing of the band as “Cheap-Ass Funk Straight off the Front Porch,” the duo that breathes heart and soul into Mofro is singer/multi-instrumentalist J.J. Grey and guitarist Daryl Hance.

Mofro’s music, unlike many groups that are part of the more mainstream music industry today, is nothing if not sincere. It is music with heart and social—and especially environmental—consciousness and makes one realize what has been missing from much of the music industry today.The lyrics and music are woven so tightly together that one cannot separate the two.

When listening to Lochloosa, the group’s second album, one is liable to be struck with the versatility of the group’s sound, which presents a range of song types and grooves while still somehow managing to form a coherent, no-nonsense sonic fingerprint. Incidentally, this sound is both original but familiar, bringing to mind any number of other groups in the swamprock genre, but sounding like none of them. The almost tactile quality of their music is slightly disorienting when it first hits the ear, and the album takes repeated listenings to let the band’s sound and style seep into one’s skin, but well worth the effort.

Hance’s slide guitar permeates the album, creating atmosphere that supports and enhances the mood of each track without ever quite stepping into the spotlight. It is the closest one can come to having an example of the “strong, silent type” translated into music, and the songs on the album would be

sound ground #77

diminished without them. The haunting slide playing on “Ten Thousand Islands” stands out as particularly beautiful, and is complemented by Grey on harmonica.

Grey’s vocals, like many other aspects of this group’s sound, take some getting used to; they are simultaneously too gritty and too polished to make sense outside of the context of the band’s sound. The warm, sweet-yet-melancholy vocals on the title track are those of a lover, and he absolutely wails by the end, belting out the words from the depths of his being.

The more introspective tracks on the album are balanced by ones that are just good, plain fun. The infectious groove the band lays down on “Six Ways From Sunday” and the gruff, humorous funk of “Dirtfloorcracker” make it next to impossible not to get up and simply move to the music.

Their music is real, their music is organic, their music is simple and honest, and yes, even a bit sentimental. Simply put, Mofro’s music is sonic proof that there really is no place like home.

Mofro will be appearing this Saturday, May 28 at 5 p.m. on the Sunshine Stage at Three Sisters Park as part of the Summer Camp 2005 Music Festival in Chillicothe, Ill.

music

2. this week in music

TODD J. HUNTER • STAFF WRITER

A

nd the radio man says, “Rock ‘n’ roll lives!”

Honorary Champaign-Urbana band Kissinger (now neighbors of Solips in Austin,Texas) will be back here June 9 at Cowboy Monkey.The special occasion is a release show for Me and Otto, the second full-length Kissinger release, and Green Light Go opens. Show time is 10:30 p.m., and cover is $3.

Kissinger last played here Sept. 16 with JigGsaw but stayed another day and saw Terminus Victor. Kissinger made three tour stops here the year prior. March 18, Kissinger won the title of 2005 Austin Music Foundation Incubator Band, which comes with a $15,000 recording budget. Kissinger also appear May 29 at Schubas in Chicago with The Like Young (ex-Wolfie) and Mike Downey of The New Constitution. Show time is 8 p.m., and cover is $10 ($8 in advance).

Green Light Go have news of their own, some sad. Bassist Mike Daab (also of Grand Poobah) is moving to Indianapolis but will go on with the band. Guitarist and co-founder Darin Smith, however, has announced his departure in order to concentrate on a teaching career. A four-state tour starts tomorrow night at Lemmons in St. Louis, and Nik Allen of Pulsar47 will fill in for Smith.

May 24,The Like Young officially issued The Timid EP, a vinyl-only three-track. The show with Kissinger and Mike Downey is the last on the horizon; Joe and Amanda Ziemba will spend all summer practicing and recording songs for album number three. The recording will begin in August at Key Club Studio.Writes Amanda:“As much as we would love to be back out ASAP, it won’t be happening until our next full-length is released.When that hits the streets, so will we.”

Tonight at 8, as part of its acoustic music series, Aroma presents Rachel Brandstadter and Joanna Michal. Brandstadter is a guitarist-vocalist for Cameo Turret, and Michal is a singersongwriter who recently released a six-track EP, Impostor, available at Exile on Main Street.At 11:30 p.m.,The Weakdaze will play across the street at Cowboy Monkey.

Saturday afternoon at Crystal Lake Park, UrbanaTeens.com hosts its first annual Teen Battle of the Bands. Live performance launches at 3:50 with Epitaph for an Enemy, then continues through 8:50 with True to Form, H.O.T., 217, Right to Remain, Dark Room Notes, Mac & Ez, The Greytones, Crown Frog and Krash Type 17. In August, the winner will play on the main stage of the Illinois State Fair, and the top three bands will play at the Urbana Sweetcorn Festival. Saturday night at 7, in Savoy, bossa nova cooperative Desafinado returns to Steep & Brew, the coffee nook at Pages for All Ages.There is no cover for these shows today and Saturday.

All of a sudden,“The Void” mysteriously looks less like a house basement and more like The Canopy Club.Wednesday night, in the second installment of a summer concert series, The Void/The Canopy Club spotlight The Living Blue, Tractor Kings and The Situation. Show time is 9 p.m., and cover is $5. May 17, The Living Blue opened for seminal glam-rock group New York Dolls at the Metro in Chicago.

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Todd J. Hunter hosts WEFT Sessions and Champaign Local 901, two hours of live local music every Monday night at 10 on 90.1 FM. Send news to soundground@excite.com.

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Excellent singer-songwriter Jonathan Richman (Modern Lovers not included) will play 22 shows this June, completely bypassing Chicago and instead sticking to the land he loves, the East Coast. He will, however, be making an appearance in St. Louis at Blueberry Hill on June 23.

Frankie Poullain, bassist of popular glam-rock revival band The Darkness, has announced his exit of the group. According to British newspaper The Sun, “Tensions grew during recording sessions in Wales over Frankie’s mind being elsewhere. Frankie felt he had done all he could and decided to retire to the French countryside.”

Jenny Lewis, lead singer of Rilo Kiley, and also possibly my best friend if I ever got to meet her, will release a solo album entitled Rabbit Fur Coat to be released by Conor Oberst´s (of Bright Eyes) label sometime by January. “It’s pretty strippeddown, kind of rootsy at times. In the end, it shaped up to be this weird, loose gospel-y record,” she said of the album.

U2 megalomaniac Bono reportably told Chicago Tribune music critic Greg Kot that that the band is interested in rerecording 1997 LP Pop. Bono blames the impending tour (booked by the band’s manager) for what he sees as low quality, but he feels the potential is for something better. I guess not all the past is viewed through rose-tinted glasses.

Dancepunks and British Big-beat DJs rejoice!

DFA Records and Astralwerks have announced a partnership, meaning that Astralwerks will be carrying, among other things, Juan Maclean’s Less Than Human. Hopefully it’ll be better than Daft Punk’s disappointing, more-mortal Human After All, released on Astralwerks this year.

w H at tH e He L L? MOMENT OF THE WEEK Kylie Minogue recently announced that she has been diagnosed with breast cancer, and her Australian tour dates will have to be rescheduled. This announcement on her Web site caused a sheer torrent of fans to visit the site, and promptly overload the server. We send Kylie our best wishes.

I N T R O | A R O U N D T O W N | L I S T E N , H E A R | M A I N E V E N T | A R T S & E N T E R TA I N M E N T | T H E S I LV E R S C R E E N | T H E S T I N G E R | C L A S S I F I E D S

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BY FRANK KROLICKI

On their first full-length release, 2003’s Chain Gang of Love, The Raveonettes offered up a collection of songs that sounded like the result of a jam session between the ghosts of Buddy Holly and Joey Ramone. Its bubblegum melodies were filled with distortion and bizarre, spooky street imagery, creating a package that somehow worked. Pretty in Black, the follow-up, finds the Danish duo and their now fleshed-out band turning down the noise and incorporating a bit more variety, which will probably leave half their audience disappointed and the other half pleased.

The Raveonettes have never been shy about citing their heroes. Their name is a constant reminder of their love for Brill Building ‘60s girl-group pop (take out the “-ave-”), which marks some of the high points of the album. Sharin Foo coos through a fluffy, surprisingly faithful cover of The Angels’ 1963 hit,“My Boyfriend’s Back.”You almost have to wonder why it’s there, but it becomes irrelevant as it is just as infectious and fun as the original. For their “Ode to L.A.” (and to retro girl-group pop itself), the band sought out former Ronette and seasoned bad girl Ronnie Spector for guest vocals. It’s an overt effort to mimic the lush,“wall of sound” style that Phil Spector mastered with the Ronettes, and perhaps that’s why it works so well. The band makes no secret of the fact that these songs are the result of an intense love of the music that inspired them.

The first single, “Love in a Trashcan,” is a swaggering guitar number with disposable-yet-memorable lyrics about girls falling for trashy, no-good guys. When Sune Rose Wagner proclaims, “If you touch that girl, you know it’s OK/People say she’s a whore anyway/I think she looks like a nice vamp/Looking for love in a trashcan,” you know you’re in for music that doesn’t take itself too seriously. Almost as fun is “Twilight,” which employs a churning disco stomp that truly allows The Raves to rave.

“Here Comes Mary” combines a lilting melody with disturbing lyrics, and could be the equally grim sequel to The Shangri-Las’ “Leader of the Pack.” It’s a novel idea to follow up on the aftermath of that musically infamous motorcycle

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PARASOL RECORDS TOP 10 SELLERS

crash—quite possibly the most melodramatic moment in rock ‘n’ roll history—and the result is captivating. Also downbeat, the folk balladry of “Uncertain Times” manages to be dreamy, dark and hopeful all at once, boasting the lyrics, “And if the atom bomb should end us both/I’ll be happy to go to the stars with you.”

Some songs don’t fare as well. “The Heavens,” a sleepy ballad that Wagner says he wrote for Elvis, had he been alive today, is nice after a few listens but ultimately a dull, forgettable opener. “If I Was Young” suffers from the same problem. “Somewhere in Texas” is a wasteland of a song that succeeds in conjuring desert imagery but not in going anywhere musically special.

Overall,The Raveonettes justify the changes they made to their sound on Pretty in Black enough to make it a must-have disc for fans and a worthwhile listen for curious observers. The noisy bite of Chain Gang of Love is noticeably absent and will no doubt be missed enough by some to consider this material a letdown. But what the album lacks in intensity it makes up for in variety—and variety makes for a more interesting rave.

MA Y 26

22nd Annual Memorial Day Barbecue [Pork chop or chicken dinner includes cole slaw, baked beans, roll and a beverage] Evangelical Covenant Church, 260 S. Union, Paxton, 11:30am, $6.50/person

s

Lead

1. Orange Peels • Circling The Sun (Parasol) 2. The Frames • Burn the Maps (Anti) 3. The Jan Martens Frustration • The S/T (Hidden Agenda) 4. Snow & Voices • The S/T (Birdsong) 5. Celestine • Between Bedtime and Sunrise (Exergy/Starfly) 6. Mercury Rev • Secret Migration (V2) 7. Perishers • Let There Be Morning (Nettwerk) 8. Spoon • Gimme Fiction (Merge) 9. Moonbabies • War on Sound (Hidden Agenda) 10. Bjorn Norestig • Come Take a Shine (A Westside Fabrication)

May 31 Live Music Bluegrass Jam [amateurs and professionals welcome] Verde Gallery 7-9:30pm, free The Crystal River Band Rose Bowl Tavern 9pm, free Open Stage Espresso Royale Goodwin & Oregon 8pm, free Larry Gates [acoustic] The White Horse Inn 10pm, free ThreeLegChair Moonstruck Chocolate Co. 8pm, free DJ Subversion: DJ ZoZo, DJ Evily, DJ TwinScin [goth/industrial/electro] The Highdive 10pm, $2

The Raveonettes Pretty in Black

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42.7 PERCENT OF ALL STATISTICS ARE MADE UP ON THE SPOT.

Tremblin BG Barfly 10pm, free DJ Reaganomics [‘80s music] Cowboy Monkey 10pm, free DJ J-Phlip OR DJ Lil Big Bass Boltini 10:30pm, free DJ Mike 'n Molly's TBA Karaoke "G" Force Karaoke Neil St. Pub 8pm-12am, free Liquid Courage Karaoke Geovanti's 9pm-1am, free

7:30pm, free

Fitness Water Aerobics [Introductory course for those considering the pool as a way to get in shape.]

Mettler Center 9:30am, free Belly Dance for Fitness The Fitness Center Champaign 8pm, $7-$9 Kids Storytime Pages for All Ages 7pm, free

Books Fiber Arts Discussion Group [Discuss topics from a fibercraft related book while working on crafts, chatting, and sharing tips and techniques.

This week is a knitting refresher. Participants will need to bring size 6-9 knitting needles and a skein of light-colored worsted weight yarn. The book will be Knitlit: Sweaters and Their Stories...and Other Writing about Knitting, by Linda Roghaar and Molly Wolf.]

Pages for All Ages

wednesday June 1 Live Music Apollo Poetics: Apollo Project with guest DJs Nargile, 10pm, free Chambana Jackson’s Ribs-n-Tips, 8-

10pm Ed O'Hare and Friends Rose Bowl Tavern 9pm, free Blues Night: Kilborn Alley Tommy G's 10pm, free

Urbana Booking Co. Presents: The Living Blue, Tractor Kings, The Situation The Canopy Club 9pm, $5

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DJ Chef Ra [roots, reggae] Barfly 10pm, free Karaoke Liquid Courage Karaoke Geovanti's 10pm-2am, free Outlaw Karaoke The White Horse Inn 10pm, free Dancing Tango Dancing Cowboy Monkey 7:30pm, free Salsa Dancing Cowboy Monkey 10pm, free Lectures, Meetings, Workshops Open Poetry Night [writers may read their own work or just listen] Illini Union Bookstore 7-8 pm Fitness UIUC Yoga Club Illini Union room 406 7:30pm, free

Columbia

BY TODD J. HUNTER

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IN EW L 2 VI IL K RE R E OV

1966: Despondent about American indifference to “River Deep,

Mountain High,” Phil Spector secretly went to work with an unknown duo in Denmark.As a sociopolitical statement, they galvanized the girl-group sound with fuzz pedals and songs about sex. Although they made an acetate, there were other, faster iconoclasts, and the album collected dust until 2003, when it was issued as Chain Gang of Love by The Raveonettes.

How Phil Spector really spent the rest of 1966 is anybody’s guess, but that bit of historical revisionism sums up the precursor to Pretty in Black, the new album by The Raveonettes.

This apple does not fall far from that tree.

Tracks three through five comprise the heart of the album.

Lead single “Love in a Trashcan” matches a twangy melody with an equally twangy “c’mon, baby” and a “let’s give it to ‘em right now” guitar solo. The best cut, “Sleepwalking,” bears a strong similarity to “Special K” by Placebo, which itself bears a strong similarity to “Mother's Little Helper” by The Rolling Stones.

A dark love song, “Sleepwalking” seemingly settles down, then churns on as an instrumental for almost another minute.

After another love song, the gorgeously world-weary

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"Uncertain Times," comes the car crash: a tepid cover of "My Boyfriend's Back" by The Angels. The lead vocal is aloof from start to finish, and nothing new is introduced.

If a cover was necessary, "Remember (Walkin' in the Sand)"

by The Shangri-Las would have been a better fit.

Goodness resumes with "Here Comes Mary," a morbid adaptation of "All I Have to Do Is Dream" by The Everly Brothers. "Twilight" and "You Say You Lie" are cool, trippy tracks that sandwich the even cooler "Somewhere in Texas," the one tune here to rekindle the smoky fire from Whip It On. "Ode to L.A." is an uncategorizable extravaganza not content just to revisit "Baby, I Love You" by The Ronettes, even if it evokes equally "This Magic Moment" by Jay & The Americans. It recruits a gratefully divorced Ronnie Spector (née Veronica Bennett) for a duet with Sharin Foo.The tribute is inventive and adds some sunshine to the album. The other celebrity guest of yesteryear is Moe Tucker of The Velvet Underground, who plays drums on "Ode to L.A." and three other tracks.

The original material is solid, and the harmonies hypnotic. Except where The Raveonettes paint by numbers, Sune Rose Wagner and Sharin Foo adeptly rewrite American rock ‘n’ roll history through their Scandinavian perspective. Pretty in Black may not improve upon previous work but is a most welcome extension of their catalogue.

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& Art

T heater

PHOTOS • COURTESY OF JEANNINE BESTOSO

c

I HEAR IF YOU SHOUT “DAVE MATTHEWS” THREE TIMES, HE’LL APPEAR.

Artistry in Wood [Fine furniture and decorative objects by Jeff Boshart, Charleston; Stephen Chrisman, Danville; David Griffin, Charleston; Kurt Henigman, Champaign; Myron Kates, Urbana; Tim LaTourette, Fayetteville, AR; Dwain Naragon, Westfield; Thomas Skaggs, Champaign; John and Charlie Sweitzer, Champaign. And an ongoing display of work by 42 Illinois artists.]

Cinema Gallery through July 2 Tue-Sat 10am-4pm Out Of Site [featuring paintings by Ann McDowell, and mixed media by Josh Ipple and ceramics by Geoff Bant, Linda Dumich, Linda Weiner, and Sara Redd] Springer Cultural Center through June 4 Mon-Fri 8am-9pm, Sat 9am-5pm, Sun 12-5 pm

The work of Mark Reutter is on display at Creation Art Studios.

Beneath The Surface [Featuring paintings

by Richard Benoit and works in glass by Barrie Bredemeier] Verde Gallery through July 2 Tue-Sat: 7am-10pm Cafe; 12-10pm Gallery Digital Media Student Juried Exhibition [The annual student-juried exhibitions serve as a collection of the best student work for the current academic year]

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Parkland Art Gallery through June 16 Mon-Thu 10am-2pm, Tue-Thu 6-8pm Not Enough Space [An international touring exhibit marking the 25th anniversary of the incarceration of two Puerto Rican political prisoners, Oscar López Rivera and Carlos Alberto Torres, in U.S. federal facilities] UIUC Main Library, first floor, 1408 West Gregory Drive, Urbana Spring 2005 Art Exhibition [work by Jeannine Bestoso, Melissa Mitchell, Mark Reutter, Amy Richardson, and Wesley Waters] Creation Art Studios and Gallery through June 5 Hours: Tue-Fri 1-5:30pm, Sat 1-4pm and by appointment, 344-6955, www.creationartstudios.com Centennial High School Student Art Show [For this unique display, the students in artist and educator Shannon Batman's class have created wonderfully expressive self-portraits. The students were inspired by a variety of artists including Frida Kahlo.

The framing for this show was partially funded by a Tepper Grant awarded to instructor Shannon Batman.]

Pages For All Ages through May 31 Mon-Thu 9am-10pm, Fri-Sat 9am-11pm, Sun 10am-9pm Invisible Infrastructure: Maps and Photographs [Works by Christian Sandvig and Hope Hall] Humanities Lecture Hall through July 22 805 W. Pennsylvania Ave, www.iprh.uiuc.edu Mon-Fri 8:30am-5pm Quantum Garden [original prints by Charles Segard] Aroma Cafe through June 4 Mon-Sun 7am-12am Mapping Sitting: On Portraiture and Photography [this exhibition ventures into uncharted territory with photographic and video installations and uses portraits by Arab photographers, including passport studio photographs, photo "surprise," itinerant photography, and group portraits to present a dynamic picture of the Middle East.

Organized by Walid Raad and Akram Zaatari.]

Krannert Art Museum through June 5.

Tue, Thu-Sat 9am-5pm, Wed 9am-8pm, Sun 25pm Suggested Donation: $3 Aroma Cafe is looking for artists to exhibit their work. If you are interested in exhibiting your art, please contact Amanda Bickel, art coordinator at Aroma Cafe at art4aroma@yahoo.com.

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every

artist was first an amateur

M U S I C SHOULD NEVER BE HARMLESS

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Daring Displays

JEFF COFFIN’S MU’TET:

Seniors show work in first-ever BFA art exhibit at the Krannert Art Museum

Robbie Robertson • The Band

A NECESSITY OF EXPRESSION AT SUMMER CAMP KYLE GORMAN• MUSIC EDITOR

s DAVID RUTHENBERG • STAFF WRITER

PHOTOS • AUSTIN HAPPEL

E

very student earning a bachelor’s degree in fine and applied arts either at the end of the spring semester or in December 2005 was invited to show their work in the first-ever BFA art exhibit; a total of 79 graduating students gladly accepted.This marked the first time anything of this nature has ever been attempted by the University, and will hopefully start “a new tradition,” says Alan Mette, art and design faculty member and member of the BFA Exhibition Committee.

Art education, ceramics, glass, graphic design, industrial design, metals, painting, photography and sculpture were all represented in the exhibit, giving all patrons the opportunity to snack liberally from the art and design variety platter and appreciate the laborious art students who lie in work-saturated hiding for most of the year.

A table on display at the BFA exhibition in the Krannert Art Museum Thursday, May 12.

ummer Camp is a multi-night festival in Chillicothe, Ill., (just north of Peoria). Taking place this upcoming Memorial Day weekend, the festival is three nights of music and primitive camping put on by Jay Goldberg Events & Entertainment (the same people responsible for The Canopy Club).The festival features three nights of music from headliners moe., a performance by local favorites Apollo Project and even dance music from SCI Fidelity house artist DJ Harry. Buzz chatted with Jeff Coffin, reed player for Béla Fleck & The Flecktones and leader of his own Mu’tet, who will be appearing at Summer Camp on Sunday.

How does one learn to listen?

There is a number of different ways. One of the things is how to listen to the music and what to listen to.If you’re looking at a piece of art, you can look at the picture and the frame, or you can get into great detail.You can actually see the brush strokes, where (the artist) may have used blue in this corner ...

You can really get into the transparency of the music, by just listening to the high hat, or the piano, or the bass or the soloist ... eventually, all that stuff unfolds and you’re able to listen to everything, but still be able to pinpoint different things.

Buzz: What is the ‘Mu’tet’ about?

Jeff: It’s from the word ‘mutation.’ It’s always changing, and we can play any music with that group. It’s meant to be a little bit of a community.

Like hand-independence in drumming, for example?

There is ear independence—it’s also the same thing.The ear learns to be able to listen to a lot of things at once.

Anyone who has seen you knows about your ability to play two saxes. How did that evolve, and for what purpose?

It’s a Roland Kirk thing. He’d actually do three at a time.

(The hard part is) trying to figure out different fingerings for things. I do a Montuno thing, drone on one of the horns. A number of years ago, I was playing in an acid jazz group (when that was happening), and we didn’t have any harmony players, so I tried to provide some harmony with the two horns.

Do you ever have difficulty playing in different keys at once?

That’s the trick: thinking in two keys at once.

You have various pedals in your setup. How do you use electronics to enhance your performance?

I use them as a different sound, a different sonic texture. I use an envelope filter, I use a harmonizer, I use a digital delay pedal. I use a phase shifter, whatever I can use that I think actually sounds decent.

Above: Kimberly Skukas' mixed-media sculpture titled "Bus Stop" displayed in the BFA art exhibition at the Krannert Art Museum on Thursday, May 12.

Left: Two angles of Ashley Gierke's "Duplicity" displayed on the floor of the BFA art exhibition at the Krannert Art Museum on Thursday, May 12.

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Could you give an example of how you use the harmonizer?

PHOTO • COURTESY OF CORRINA GREENBERG For example, on ‘Mad Hatter Rides Again,’ there’s a bass breakdown, there’s a series of hits. I put it on a tritone and play a major third and it gives me the flat seven underneath it. If I was going to put a harmony on it, the harmonizer is giving me the harmony I’d put on it.

You regularly have the opportunity to play with Béla, who is such a great improviser.

How do you interact with someone who can go in any direction?

We are all trained, at this point, as improvising musicians, to hopefully be able to go anywhere on the fly. A lot of it is learning how to listen.

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You play a lot of sax on bluegrass/country tracks with the Flecktones. What’s your method for adding sax in these pieces?

I don’t want to sound like Shorter or Coltrane over ‘Big Country.’ I’m going to let the tune or the spirit of the music tell me how that music is supposed to be played. I’m going to try to morph but still maintain my individuality.

Listening, that’s the one big thing.The harmony is a given, the rhythm is a given.

What are the Flecktones up to right now?

There’s a new record that’s in the works. It’ll be out at the very beginning of 2006.

Can we expect as many guests as the last record?

There are no guests, just the four of us. It was something we wanted to do on the last CD.We let providence decide what we’re going to do on it.

Who are your spiritual forebears in your playing?

Guys like Coltrane, Miles Davis ...Albert Ayler, Ornette Coleman, Abdullah Ibrahim, Keith Jarrett, Inayat Khan.

They have a necessity of expression.

What sax player should people these days listen to?

Ravi Coltrane, John Coltrane’s son. Chris Potter; Mark Turner is ridiculous.There are certain guys who come to the top who really sound like themselves. buzz

Summer Camp begins today (for early birds) and continues through to Sunday in Chillicothe.

For more information or to purchase tickets, go to www.jaytv.com.

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ISN'T DISNEY WORLD JUST A PEOPLE TRAP OPERATED BY A MOUSE?

MA Y 26

seth fein

the local sniff

Open Letter to CU Smoke-Free Alliance

•

J U N . 1 , 2 OO5

MA Y 26

•

I have had the chance to think about your response to my column condemning you for breaking down freedom in America. And while I still stand by the ideal that no governing body should have dominion over someone’s private property, I believe that, given the recent news, there is some sort of compromise to be worked out here.

Let’s play pretend for a little while.

Let’s pretend that we are in a relationship. I’ll be the dominant and talkative person even if you don’t want that role. But let’s pretend that we are in love and we are having an argument.

I say that smoking should be allowed in private establishments such as bars and restaurants, and you say that smoking should be banned in those places because it has been proven to have an adverse effect on the health of innocent bystanders.

So, we have a problem, yes?

Let’s take the advice of some marriage counselors. Instead of putting the problem between us, let’s stand together, and put the problem in front of us.This way we can see the problem clearly and have a chance to compromise, and most importantly, collaborate on this most important issue. You want things to change and I want to stand by your side and support your efforts.

There is a fundamental difference in the way we are seeing

this problem, and I would like the chance to clear this up.

You believe that restaurants and bars are public domain. But if the toilet breaks at The Iron Post, who has to fix it? If the refrigerator stops working in Lil’ Porgy’s, can they call the city to come repair it?

The answer is no.They can’t.They have to pay for someone to fix it or they have to do it themselves.This is what separates a public building from a private building. If the computers shut down at the courthouse, we all pay for it, because it is a public facility, right? Let’s not go around telling people what they can and can’t do in their places of business. I mean, they pay for the toilets. They pay the taxes. So let’s leave the decision to allow smoking in their businesses up to them.

Good. I’m glad we got that settled. So, now that we’re clear on that, let’s move on to the collaboration part of this reconciliation.

I am a smoker, and you are saddened that I am ruining my health and in effect ruining the health of others voluntarily. I am sorry. I really am. But I am afflicted with an addiction; a disease.

And while I take responsibility for my actions, I need you to be patient with me. I am willing to try to get better, so let’s start with something that is core to this issue.

When I was a child, I was influenced by certain people to start smoking at a young age. Again, I am not assigning blame to anyone else here, but I was young and impressionable.

Certainly, my mom and dad were good about keeping me away

GOOD NIGHT. GOOD WORK. SLEEP WELL. I'LL MOST LIKELY KILL YOU IN THE MORNING.

ar tist’s corner

Katie Richardson

Marvin Gaye says: “Let’s get it on!”

Dear fellow citizens,

J U N . 1 , 2 OO5

from smoke and it only seems fair that, because it’s illegal to buy and smoke cigarettes until you’re 18, we keep smoke away from the young people. I don’t want my future children inhaling some person’s Viceroy 100 and I don’t want any child now to inhale my USA Gold Light.

So how about we join hands and fight this issue together?

Let’s move to ban all cigarette smoking in privately-owned places that allow children under the age of 18. I think that it’s only fair for us adults to be able to dictate what we do, but let’s keep the smoke out of the children’s lungs. As a smoker, I HATE it when people are smoking around me when I eat and what’s more, I don’t want Seth Fein is from to influence or harm any young children while Urbana. He would I’m suffering from my affliction. What do you like to point out that say? Can we work together on this?

Bill Hicks died of Now that we’re done playing pretend, pancreatic cancer, not please write me. My email address is seth- of any smoking related fein@hotmail.com. I want to change city pol- disease. For the record. icy as much as you do now. Let’s join up and He can be reached at fight this thing. But I am only willing to join sethfein@hotmail.com your alliance if you are willing to accept my compromise. I am a good organizer and can be a fairly persuasive speaker. I mean after all, I still have a job writing for Buzz, even after that whole mayor thing.What do you say, partners?

THE SALVAGED TONGUE

PHOTO • DAVID SOLANA

8 • buzz weekly

Katie Richardson is a recent graduate of the University of Illinois. She has obtained degrees in creative writing, English and journalism. She is currently looking for a job, as writing poetry is a skill that is not, in and of itself, terribly lucrative.

What inspires you?

Wit. Cynicism. Altruism. Friends. People who express themselves in a cunning, cutting or precise manner without being cliché and trite.

When did you start writing poetry?

I started reading and writing poetry when I was in high school. At that time I was way into projecting ‘the dark girl’ persona. Basically, I read Plath, Sexton, Dickinson—all the misery chicks.

I didn’t really look at poetry then as an art form.

I didn’t see it as something that was composed or recognize the ways in which poetry can transcend being a solipsistic vehicle that expresses one person’s basic human emotion.What I wrote then was ridiculous. All of those ‘pieces’ were about death, sadness and how hard being white and middle class in America is, etc. Basically, I considered myself artistic because I had a melancholy disposition and I dyed my hair burgundy.

What is your greatest weakness?

My greatest weakness as a writer is my inability to force myself to write every day. I get lazy sometimes, which has been many writers’, greater writers than me, downfall.

b u z z w e e k l y • 17

My greatest weakness as a human being is my inability to articulate myself well during everyday conversations. Most people who know me only casually have good reason to assume I’m a scatterbrain.

What is your greatest strength?

My greatest strength as a writer is my ability to rework pieces that I have written. I don’t mind revising; in fact, I regard revision as an absolute necessity.

My greatest strength as a human being is my ability to look below the surface of people.

I think the public face is only the beginning of any one person’s humanity.

How do you handle criticism?

Well, if the critic has made some good suggestions, if they have kept the poem’s thematic thread and aesthetic in mind while making suggestions, then I am more than happy to accept criticism. In fact, I think that I am in constant need of helpful suggestions. A more exact word or a different way of expressing a thought will probably only serve to benefit me and the work. However, if someone disagrees with a political or social statement the piece is making then I probably won’t change anything. In those cases I simply say, ‘If I subscribed to your value system then I would find your insights interesting and enlightening, however, since I do not, I think I will leave this just as it is.’

The tongue, after it was held triumphantly in the hand of the sea witch, after the blood dripped down her fingertips, after she smiled sinisterly at it, after it stopped being able to taste the salt on her hand, was thrown into a fire burning under one of her witches’ brews. The mermaid sprouted legs and rose to the surface, never married the prince, then died.

She was fifteen and stupid and the sea witch knew this: The mermaid had settled for a stupid clod, who really just wanted a nice land girl. As a child, I would have liked it better if the sea witch had thrown the damn thing in her trashcan, or a compost pile or the back seat of her car. For if this is Hans Christian Anderson’s parable depicting the perils of losing one’s virginity too soon, then her fate was sealed the second that cherry tongue morphed into a pile of ash. The mermaid didn’t have the chance to turn back. She couldn’t slip in the witch’s lair and sift through a pile of old banana peels for that priceless organ, then find an old sewing kit and stitch the bugger back on. In retrospect, that might have been an unsanitary and under-effective course of action. So, instead, I should like to make the mermaid realize that though she cannot talk anymore, she can certainly still draft a farewell letter to that thoughtless monarch, and then buy herself some nice red shoes. I’d like her to wear those heels everywhere she goes. Along with a low-cut dress, and then go home with every guy she finds attractive who’s willing and able to show her a good time. I’d like her to enjoy it. I’d like her to keep the shoes on while they’re in bed, and I want her to shove her heels in the air and open her mouth as large as she can. I want her to dig her nails so hard into their backs that they are the ones left screaming. I want her to make good use of the hole that the witch, that he, left her with. I want her to realize that it was they who placed such great value on it. And that she didn’t lose anything, she traded it in, because it was hers, because she was a wild little rebel who liked taking chances, and lusted for the opportunity to emerge from a deep boring blueness into the world of red shoes and ecstatic stimulation. And that she’s free now. And she’s only just had a taste of what’s out there.

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MA Y 26

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J U N . 1 , 2 OO5

buzz weekly • 7

ARE CHILDREN WHO ACT IN R-RATED MOVIES ALLOWED TO SEE THEM?

SEWING PIECES C O N T I N U E D F RO M PA G E

6

For Erica, the class was a catharsis. “I had a really, really hard time. It brought up everything I’ve been dealing with right then and cleansed it all out.”

Putting the pieces together But to get to that point required going through some painful memories. For the first time, Erica acknowledged her personal experience with sexual assault.

“It all kicked me in the face and I was dying for a while,” she says.

Erica closed up and began to cut people out of her life, something she had never done. She stopped coming around to her friends’ houses and spent a lot of time by herself.

“There were so many aspects that go into the whole thing, you know?” Erica says. “There’s my dad as the victim, my dad as the perpetrator and then me and then everything else ... it’s a lot to deal with. If I was going to be an effective counselor, I had to deal with my stuff and get it all out.”

And that she did, with a lot of help from her mom. “It’s nice to have an ally in the family who knows me so well, who understands where I’m coming from,” Erica says. Mrs. Taffs became a leaning post for Erica.

“The divorce and the alcoholism and the legal trouble and the

Empire had the better ending.

I mean, Luke gets his hand cut off, finds out Vader's his father, Han gets frozen and taken away by Boba Fett. It ends on such a down note.

That's what life is, a series of down endings.

STAR WARS EPISODE III:

All Jedi had was a bunch of Muppets.

REVENGE OF THE SITH

-Clerks

sexual abuse, it all really hit her,” says her mother. “That’s not just something you get through. It changes your life.”

Erica and her mother are very close. They shop together, gossip together, dine together and provide unfaltering support for each other. “We’ve had to really cling to each other in the last couple of years,” Erica says.

Growing up, Mrs. Taffs taught Erica the importance of getting things off your chest and encouraged Erica to talk to her friends rather than hold stuff in.“My opinion is that you spill your guts and share with your girlfriends and stuff life that,” explains Mrs. Taffs.

Erica followed her advice and shared everything with her friends to help her cope.

While working things through, one of the only people she remained close with was her friend Carol Czarnecki, whom she met freshman year at U of I and lived with in the dorms as a sophomore.

Carol and Erica have the kind of relationship that doesn’t need perpetual conversation—much of it is on a “silent basis,” as Carol puts it.

“We don’t always need to be talking to have a good time. There are countless times I can remember us going out on drives to escape for a bit, and we would just cruise and not say anything at all to each other.We found comfort in just being in the presence of one another,” Carol wrote in an e-mail sent from Manchester, England, where

she is studying this semester.“Being in England, I realize how much she contributes to my sanity.”

Erica knows the power of listening, too. Carol says that sometimes the best thing Erica does is listen to her vent. “She’ll sit there and listen to what I have to say and offer the support I need, even it it’s just another persons telling me that I’m not overreacting. Going through some things ... Erica was the best thing I could have asked for.”

But for Erica, each separate incident is just another piece sewn into the woman she has become. She takes from each situation the courage necessary to endure challenges that would rip some people apart at the seams.

“In some respects, Erica had to grow up much earlier than most girls. She’s dealt with her family problems, many of her friends’ problems and her own personal dilemmas in ways I couldn’t even imagine,” writes Carol.

As Erica holds out her nearly finished quilt, inspecting the stitches connecting squares of old T-shirts from the Goodwill store, she says, “It’s my mother’s strength and support that has gotten me through all this crap.”

At 21 years old, Erica is ready to get through whatever may be ahead—she calls the shots. buzz

ANDREW VECELAS • FILM EDITOR

Finally, 22 years after the closing credits of Return of the

Lucas no longer has his vision limited by the technology available.

Jedi, George Lucas has given us another film worthy of the Star Wars title. Episode I was marred by an innocuous plot and characters that always felt out of place, and Episode II came to a screeching halt by trying to mix scifi epic with embarrassingly trite romance.

While Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith is not immune to some of the problems that plagued its predecessors, it has enough excitement and spectacle to make up for its shortcomings.

Much of the fun of the original

Star Wars trilogy rests in the experience of being thrown in a galaxy far, far away with reckless abandon. Lucas was comfortable with just hinting at the larger backstory that explained the motivations and histories of his characters, striking a fine balance between a sweeping plot and the nonstop adventure that distinguished the films. Now in the prequel trilogy, he’s been forced to detail at length the political maneuvers and minute explanations that never bogged down the original films, and the series has obviously suffered as a result.

Here Lucas’ script does a better job of alternating the action that Star Wars fans crave with the story he needs to develop.The first two-thirds of the film focus on the gradual transformation of Anakin Skywalker (Hayden Christensen) from a headstrong Jedi to the mechanically vicious Darth Vader. Anakin loses his trust in the Jedi council and is wooed to the dark side

by Senator Palpatine (Ian McDiarmid), who reveals himself as the menacing Sith Lord who the Jedi have long sought.

This seduction occurs in the midst of a number of impressively staged action pieces. Make no mistake, the Star Wars films have always been special-effects laden extravaganzas, and Revenge of the Sith definitely delivers with the eye candy.

Many of the scenes have so much going on in the background that additional viewings are practically necessary in order to take all of it in. The opening space battle occurs on an almost unprecedented scale. Most of the later light saber fights and battle scenes are equally impressive. It seems Lucas no longer has his vision limited by the technology available, as practically every scene takes place before a generally convincing digital backdrop.

Though the film brings the series to new heights visually,

q+a

it does so with a number of dramatic hiccups along the way. It is an understatement to say that Lucas has trouble generating convincing and entertaining dialogue. The romantic scenes between Christensen and Natalie Portman, two actors who have proven their considerable talents in other films, still have not improved much over the last film. It’s a wonder Anakin and Padmé have managed to stay together, since they display nothing in the way of chemistry or interesting dialogue.

Christensen also grates on the nerves in many of his later scenes, as he still proves incapable to look convincingly angry or use inflection in his voice.

When he finally is transformed into the black-clad Darth Vader fans have been waiting to see, complete with voice by James Earl Jones, Lucas manages to spoil an otherwise powerful (and long-awaited) moment with a laughable reference to classic monster films.

On the bright side, McDiarmid has some fun with his role as the evil Emperor, bringing some life to a series whose most distinguished performance has thus far come from a small green puppet. The cast is rounded out by Ewan MacGregor and Samuel L. Jackson, as Jedi knights Obi-Wan Kenobi and Mace Windu, respectively, who bring some life to otherwise plain dialogue.

Other seasoned actors such as Christopher Lee and Jimmy Smits do well in what little screentime they have.

In other words, it’s pretty much business as usual for Star Wars. Corny dialogue and flat performances are as much staples of the series as light sabers and cheesy aliens (a fact that typically gets overlooked by critics).

The pedestrian dialogue typically serves only to advance to the next impressive setpiece. As long as Lucas keeps the action moving and enthralling, it’s easier to overlook the shortcomings.

Luckily, Revenge of the Sith has enough momentum to plow through tiny roadblocks such as banal dialogue and unconvincing performances. While it may not overtake the original trilogy in terms of quality, it’s a proper bridge between the old and new. If it is indeed the last film in the legendary series (at least for now), it at least returns to the qualities that made Star Wars so successful to begin with.

Nora Sage is the volunteer coordinator at Rape Crisis Services, an organization that offers support and services to victims of sexual violence and the people who care about them. All services are free and confidential, and RCS assists people of all genders and races from all walks of life. She has worked at RCS since October 2003 and has volunteered in social services organizations most of her life. As the volunteer coordinator, it is her job to organize the training and education of volunteer advocates to enable them to be of the most assistance to a victim.

How did you come to be the volunteer coordinator at Rape Crisis Services?

I was a volunteer coordinator in Tucson, Ariz., for the community mediation program.Then I moved here and applied for the job as volunteer coordinator for Rape Crisis Services. Happily, I got it.

What made you want to get involved with RCS?

I really love the idea that someday we can end violence against women and children.We’re a grass-roots organization.We help victims through all kinds of outreach, talk to people about sexual assault and help them become aware. Rape is really a silent thing.We’re taught as kids not to talk about these types of topics. We want to get it out in the open so people know that it’s really going on.

Did you go to school for this type of work?

I went to Old Dominion University in Virginia and studied health care, but as I got older—well, I was a member of NOW (National Organization for Women) in college, so I always felt like I was a feminist activist and I’ve always been a volunteer. I started out candy striping in junior high. I’ve worked for a children’s hospice, I volunteered doing youth mediations and I did home building at a place like Habitat for Humanity called Primavera Foundation—there are a lot of places that I have volunteered. To me, it’s always been really important. That’s why I value my volunteers so much. Most of them are college kids and they take time out of their schedule (to train and volunteer when they could

be partying, when they could be studying.) They take shifts where they carry the pager, meet the victim at the hospital, and let them know what their rights are, let them know what their options are. The police are there to try to solve a case, the nurse is there to collect forensic evidence, so no one’s really there for the victim except for us.

What do you do outside Rape Crisis Services?

I volunteer for a victim-offender mediation program. It’s for kids—juveniles—who get arrested for some type of crime like tagging or that type of thing. Instead of sending them to juvenile court, we’ll set up a mediation between the business that they may have done graffiti on (in the case of tagging) and the kid can do restitution through community service rather than having to start a life of crime. I think it’s really a good thing.

What is most rewarding about your work?

I would say, for me, working with volunteers is the most rewarding.

After they leave, I get letters and e-mails saying that their experience here changed their lives. In some cases, even changed the direction they want their lives to go. And I’m just humbled by them.They give so much at a young age. All our volunteers are so sincere and they’re just amazing people.To be able to get up at 3 in the morning and go to the hospital to meet a victim and see what’s happened, and listen to her story and be able to pull yourself out of it enough to give her exactly what she needs the way that she wants to accept all of her decisions, all of her choices ... that’s where I found the most satisfaction.Training them, teaching them, seeing them get the ah-ha! moment when we try to get rid of a rape myth or talk about cultural sensitivity and repression issues and things like that.

What myths would you like to dispel here?

There are a lot of common rape myths. She was wearing sexy clothes so she was asking for it. She was drinking, what did she think would happen? I’ve even had parents say that in front of their kids. Say, ‘I told her not to drink.’ I tell them her drinking didn’t make her deserve to have this happen.

PHOTO • DAVID SOLANA

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It’s about realizing, painfully, you’ve kept that voice inside yourself, l o c k e d a w a y . And you step back and s e e that your jailer has changed faces.

You’ve become your own jailer.

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I DON'T LIKE SAND. IT'S COARSE AND ROUGH AND IRRITATING AND IT GETS EVERYWHERE.

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19

: A LEGACY ON FILM

Tori Amos • Singer/songwriter and rape survivor

Reflections from our writers on the end of the biggest sci-fi series of all time

SEWING THE PIECES TOGETHER

ILLUSTRATIONS • BRITTANY BINDRIM

A

Since the release of the Star Wars prequel trilogy, the fans of the series have been split into two groups: loyalists and apologists. With the release of Episode III: Revenge of the Sith, much criticism has been focused on the acting, the dialogue and the CGI. The main problem is that many of these arguments have become tiresome and cliched. It’s not the dialogue but its delivery that makes Star Wars believable and despite the many complaints, there is a vast improvement in this chapter of the trilogy.

Don’t get bogged down in semantics and nitpicky complaints, this is a worthy installment to the saga and tons of fun. Once again, George Lucas has returned to the exciting, operatic experience of Star Wars taking the imaginations of a whole new generation to a galaxy far, far away. The circle is now complete; the Force is with this one.

“I guess it had a lot to do with alcoholism and how he changed after his legal issues; it wasn’t the same,” Erica says.

Erica has the ability to remove herself from a situation in order to view it through a lens unfogged by her emotions. She says it’s the best way to understand and make sense of what’s going on.

Sharing the attitude Erica, a senior studying speech communications at the University of Illinois, brings this attitude of survival to sexual abuse victims when she volunteers as a victim’s advocate for Rape Crisis Services in Champaign. Although she hasn’t had time to volunteer recently, she has acted as a RCS counselor since 2004.

In the spring of 2004, Erica went through the necessary 50 hours of training to become a rape crisis volunteer. After completing the training, she volunteered 10 to 15 hours a week. During a shift—5 p.m. to 9 a.m. on a weekday or 24 hours during the weekend—Erica wears a pager from RCS to answer hotline calls or go to the hospital as a medical advocate for a victim.

As a medical advocate, Erica offers victims any initial assistance they might need and informs them of their rights. She tries to support the victim’s sense of control over the situation and emphasizes that this is not their fault. All advocates carry a bag with literature, personal amenities and a change of clothes for the victim.

“We’re basically there to give them some comfort and let them know there are people out there willing to help them immediately,” says Erica.

That same spring, Erica was taking Community Health 199, a course the University teaches to train Freshman Year Campus Acquaintance Rape Education (FYCARE) facilitators. Between the two programs, she was going through 20-plus hours a week of training. Last fall, Erica taught the two-hour FYCARE sexual violence awareness seminar all University freshmen are required to take.

Erica is as vociferous inside the classroom as she is in her personal life.

“Erica’s fiery,” says Ross Wantland, her 199 instructor. “She has this righteous indignation, this really deep sense of justice that would lead her to challenging and responding to individuals in a way that allowed them to reflect on what they said and maybe think a different way.”

C O N T I N U E D O N PA G E

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The Empire Strikes Back SHADIE ELNASHAI

The intergalactic journey was unforgettable and George Lucas has proven capable of conducting a beautifully cinematic orchestra.

Episode III delivers the grand finale of fireworks and swordplay. With light sabers, of course. It is fitting that the sage teacher (Obi wan Kenobi), battling the dark side, must fend off his rebellious apprentice (Anakin Skywalker) in an epic battle of truly mythic proportions. Similarly, the prequels, while technologically superior, lack the reverence and wisdom of Episodes IV-VI. Whether or not the prequels or their predecessors left a greater impression is insignificant. But like the climactic duel, it was undoubtedly an incredible show.

Thanks for the ride, Mr. Lucas.

It was at the age of 4 that I first felt The Force. I practiced for months, trying to move objects or read people’s thoughts.When I failed, I acknowledged that I lacked the requisite discipline and focus. At 6 my iconoclastic syntactical inversions distinctly resembled those of a young Yoda, though more British. By 9 I was jumping out of second-floor windows, convincing myself that it hurt less as I was instinctively accessing The Force.When I was 13 my father would ground me, but I would calmly wave my hand and utter,“You don’t want to do that” … Obi-Wan style. He looked at me oddly, but undoubtedly recognized the power within me.At 16 my inflectional prosody had segued into a more Emperor-esque lilt.

In 2001 I participated in the British Census, and along with 390,000 other Brits I cited Jedi as my religion (I granted myself the title of Master due to my academy of converts). This 0.7 percent share put us as the fourth-largest religion in the UK. That is what Star Wars has meant to me.

DAVID JUST

It finally arrived. Perhaps the most anticipated film of the new millennium, Star Wars: Episode III: Revenge of the Sith is in fact the reason the prequel films were made. Episodes I and II are just building up to what transpires in Episode III. Despite the fact that we already know just about everything that occurs in the film, we have to see it for ourselves. With Episode III, Lucas has provided a terrific and worthy conclusion to the series, and given us the closure we have always needed.

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PHOTOS • 20TH CENTURY FOX

an attempt to understand why things are different.

“It’s always been known to me, ever since I was little, that this happened, that the abuse against him was not his fault.”

Erica’s mother, Rosemary Taffs, has always been honest with t 2 years old, Erica her daughter about Mr. Taffs’ experience with sexual abuse. The Taffs’ father walked into first time they talked about it was during a car ride when Erica her room to discover was 10 years old.

“My mom told me,‘Grandpa touched Dad in places adults shouldthat she had taken all her clothes out of the n’t touch kids,’” recalls Erica.“She said it made him sad and left a big dresser—she wanted to mark on him. She said it made him want to be a better father.”

To Erica, it was just another part of who her father was. It start dressing herself.

At 3, Erica told her didn’t change the way she looked at him—he was still her dad. mother she would no Mr. Taffs never sexually abused Erica.

“I never felt like my father didn’t love me. I knew for damn longer respond to the word “obey”—as she put sure he did.”

Erica attributes much of her it, she “wasn’t a dog.”

At 4, on a family trip understanding and acceptance of to Washington D.C., Erica the situation to her mother. “My threw herself down on the mom made sure I knew abuse is never sidewalk, threw a tantrum the fault of the victim.”

Erica’s endurance was pushed even furand demanded she be carried— ther when her father pleaded guilty to sexshe didn’t want to walk anymore.

At 5, she decided to sign her ual abuse charges on her 14th birthday in Social Security card—it was time 1998.

The terms of his 36-month probation to establish her identity.

“I was a willful child,” Erica says as her prohibited Mr. Taffs from living with fingers weave a needle and thread around the anyone under 18, including Erica. He edge of a patchwork quilt laying across her lap. moved to an apartment, but when that didn’t work out and the Taffs had a hard time find“Nobody could stop me.”

Then, at age 10, Erica learned that her father, the man who ing an affordable place for Mr. Taffs to live, sang her to sleep as a little girl, had been sexually abused as a child. A Erica moved out instead.

Every day for six months, Erica took the bus year later, Erica’s father became a perpetrator of sexual violence when he was charged with molesting a young girl outside the family. The after school to her parents’ house where she spent audacious 11-year-old accepted the facts and refused to let the situa- the next few hours doing normal eighth-grade tion dictate how she’d live her life. She is now a trained rape crisis things—doing homework, watching TV and visiting friends. At dincounselor and victim’s advocate nertime, she’d eat and remains determined to get with her parents, what she wants out of life. then spend time with As Erica, who grew up in them until around 10 Silver Spring, Md., continues There’s my dad as the victim, o’clock, when she would to stitch the white binding my dad as the perpetrator and get dropped off at the around the edge of her quilt, then me and then everything home of family friends—the she talks about how her mom Taffs had no relatives in helped her understand and face else ... it’s a lot to deal with.

Maryland so this was the closher family’s battle with sexual -Erica Taff, Rape Crisis Services volunteer est thing. She slept in the gueabuse through free discussion stroom in their basement of her father’s life and the cirand got a ride to school in cumstances around it. the morning.

“I really don’t understand all After the probation period was over, the Taffs moved the shame and guilt and grief that a lot of people feel (after experiencing sexual violence) because I’ve been surrounded by back in together but things weren’t quite the same. Her the opposite opinions for so long,” says Erica, attributing her father developed alcohol problems, and eventually the Taffs split up in late 2001 and finalized their divorce in the summer optimistic outlook to her mother’s nurturing.

There was never any shame attached to her family’s history, only of 2003.

ERIN SCOTTBERG • COMMUNITY EDITOR

RANDY MA

ALAN BANNISTER

1999: I remember when Episode I came out. I can recall the thrill of seeing the Tatooine desert landscape made new, the stunning effects, and of course the blazing blue and red glows captured in the light saber duels. But overall, I remember being disappointed. For many fans, young and old, The Phantom Menace lacked what we were looking for, and instead gave us Jar Jar Binks and an unimpressive desert speeder race. Attack of the Clones in 2002 lifted our expectations and gave us something to hope for in the conclusion of the Star Wars prequels.

With the release of Revenge of the Sith, George Lucas redeems himself. In a way it all makes sense now, and the disappointment of the first two episodes is now replaced with appreciation of the whole, thanks to the well-made transition of Revenge of the Sith into the original trilogy, with countless moments that play off the scenes that captured the world’s imagination from ‘77 to ‘83.

Thank you, Mr. Lucas.

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20 • b u z z w e e k l y

HEY, A PAGE WITHOUT STAR WARS ON IT. seem to hate him either. Wisely, the film stays somewhere in the middle and lets the audience decide for themselves how to feel. In most cases, people won’t sympathize with Hitler, but they’ll have a new perspective from which to look at him, and this is where the film really succeeds. (David Just) FEVER PITCH 3 stars Drew Barr ymore & Jimmy Fallon Fever Pitch understands that the people who have season tickets near you can feel like a family and that rooting for the team can be comfor ting even when they lose. Fallon and Barr ymore make a charming, romantic duo with offbeat chemistr y. It’s a fitting tribute to love and baseball. (Matt Pais)

THE AMITYVILLE HORROR 2 STARS

Ryan Reynolds & Melissa George The Amityville Horror doesn’t exactly break any new ground, but it is less laughable and maintains a stronger, more consistent tone of creeping terror than the recent Hide and Seek or The Ring Two. Like the poor family that chooses to live in a mansion with evil in its walls, this unnecessar y remake of The Amityville Horror simply revisits something that was better left dead. (Matt Pais) CRASH

Matt Dillon & Don Cheadle A head-on collision of political posturing and racial intolerance, Crash is more than just an ar ticulation of the division between people of different backgrounds.

It’s about the thin line between love and hate that exists between cultures in America, and the 21st-centur y atmosphere of fear, anxiety and resentment that keeps ever yone on opposite sides of an invisible fence. (Matt Pais) DOWNFALL

HITCHHIKER’S GUIDE TO THE GALAXY

Martin Freeman & Mos Def In The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, interspace time travel is little more than extending your thumb and killing time around the universe while the Earth is put back together. There’s not a lot of depth, sophistication or cohesion to the movie, but its wink-wink sense of sly British humor more than succeeds in advancing it past the easygoing giddiness of a kid-friendly sci-fi fantasy.

(Matt Pais) THE INTERPRETER 2.5 STARS Nicole Kidman & Sean Penn If I’m not mistaken, a thriller should be thrilling.

Granted, there are some nail-biting sequences and spine-tingling moments, but there is too much vapid space used for filler. Though the premise is cer tainly original, the film stumbles through its lengthy running time and sparks more political debate than necessar y.

The Interpreter should have been exciting throughout, not melodramatic in some par ts and corny in others.

(Paul Prikazsky)

Bruno Ganz & Claudia Maria Lara Is it really possible to feel sympathy for Hitler and Nazi Germany? Downfall doesn’t glorify Hitler but it doesn’t

KINGDOM OF HEAVEN

Orlando Bloom & Eva Green Like Gladiator, it features searching, male protagonists set against quasi-historical backdrops. Other similar elements include grand wars, familial loss, political intrigue and unruly violence. Many of these same components have been exercised lately via Troy, Alexander and King Ar thur, to recall some. Disappointingly, Kingdom of Heaven often feels conventional and predictable. (Tim Peters) KUNG FU HUSTLE 3.5 stars Stephen Chow Take a healthy dose of slapstick, add a dash of kung fu fighting, a pinch of Looney Toons and ser ve with a popcorn and soda and you have a dish called Kung Fu Hustle that is sure to satisfy a much-needed comedy fix. The movie delivers action, drama, comedy and even a little suspense. Overall, it will make you laugh and then some, and just goes to prove that slapstick is universally funny. What more could you want from a movie? (Brian Nichols) MILLIONS

Lewis McGibbon & Alex Etel There’s a tenderness here that belongs to Etel and McGibbon, two fine young actors who not only embody their own par ts but play off one another so well that they work mar velously as brothers. The movie is undeniably theirs, two per formers whose total age is under 20 but possess an innate honesty beyond their years.

In a movie concentrating on what to do with money that you haven’t earned, these boys show that the greatest riches they have are each other. (Matt Pais) MONSTER-IN-LAW

Jennifer Lopez & Jane Fonda Monster-in-Law is Jennifer Lopez’s best movie since Maid in Manhattan. That should be the first warning. Co-star-

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ring with Lopez is the incomparable Jane Fonda. Together, these two take the audience on a roller coaster of emotion, from bemused all the way to annoyed. By the end, it is easily the worst two-hour mother’s day gift anyone in America could give to their mom. (Andrew Crewell) SIN CITY 3.5 STARS

Bruce Willis & Mickey Rourke Sinfully sexy and deliciously enter taining, Sin City is pumped with more testosterone and male fantasies than a Las Vegas bachelor par ty. If you can get past its boorish, hyper-macho approach to the sexes, director Rober t Rodriguez will plunge you deep into a seedy, intoxicating world of sleaze, deception and revenge.

(Matt Pais)

Fresh flicks

opening this weekend

THE LONGEST YARD Adam Sandler & Chris Rock Sandler takes a shot at the role originally held by Burt Reynolds in the 1974 film about an ex-football quarterback who finds himself incarcerated, and forced into leading a team of convicts against the guards in a game of smashmouth football.

Reynolds actually appears as a convict, and prowrestlers Bill Goldberg and Steve Austin make cameos of their own as guards. (Andrew Vecelas) MADAGASCAR Chris Rock & Ben Stiller The other Chris Rock movie of the week is an animated film about a group of zoo animals who break out of captivity to rescue their friend, only to find that being on their own in the wild is a lot different from living in Central Park Zoo. Also look (or listen, as the case may be) for the voices of David Schwimmer and Cedric the Enter tainer.

(Andrew Vecelas)

3!6/9 2OUTE "URWASH !VE

MADAGASCAR (PG) (3 SCREENS) Fri. & Sat. 12:30 1:00 1:30 2:40 3:10 3:40 4:50 5:20 5:50 7:00 7:30 8:00 9:10 9:40 10:10 11:20 Sun. - Tue. 12:30 1:00 1:30 2:40 3:10 3:40 4:50 5:20 5:50 7:00 7:30 8:00 9:10 9:40 10:10 LONGEST YARD (PG–13) (3 SCREENS) Fri. & Sat. 11:30 12:00 12:30 2:05 2:35 3:05 4:40 5:10 5:40 7:15 7:45 8:15 9:50 10:20 10:50 12:15 Sun. - Tue. 11:30 12:00 12:30 2:05 2:35 3:05 4:40 5:10 5:40 7:15 7:45 8:15 9:50 10:20 ◆ STAR

WARS: EP. III (PG–13) Fri. & Sat. 11:15 12:00 12:45 1:00 1:45 2:15 3:00 3:50 4:20 4:45 5:15 6:00 7:00 7:20 7:45 8:30 9:00 10:00 10:30 10:45 11:30 12:00 Sun. - Tue. 11:15 12:00 12:45 1:00 1:45 2:15 3:00 3:50 4:20 4:45 5:15 6:00 7:00 7:20 7:45 8:30 9:00 10:00

HOUSE OF WAX (R) Fri. & Sat. 1:00 4:00 7:10 9:40 12:00 Sun. - Tue. 1:00 4:00 7:10 9:40 KICKING & SCREAMING (PG) Fri. Sat. Mon. & Tue. 11:10 1:15 3:20 5:25 7:30 9:40 Sun. 11:10 1:15 3:20 5:25 KINGDOM OF HEAVEN (R) Fri. - Tue. 7:00 10:00 MONSTER-IN-LAW (PG–13) Fri. - Tue. 11:00 1:10 3:20 5:30 7:40 10:00 GUIDE TO THE GALAXY (PG) Fri. - Tue. 1:45 4:40 UNLEASHED (R) Fri. & Sat. 1:00 3:10 5:20 7:30 9:50 12:00 Sun. - Tue. 1:00 3:10 5:20 7:30 9:50 BORN INTO BROTHELS (R) Fri. & Sat. 11:30 1:30 3:30 5:30 7:30 9:30 11:30 Sun. - Tue. 11:30 1:30 3:30 5:30 7:30 9:30

CRASH (R) Fri. & Sat. 11:00 1:10 3:20 5:30 7:40 10:00 Sneak Preview: 12:15 CINDERELLA MAN (PG–13) Sun. - Tue. 11:00 1:10 3:20 Sun. 7:30 5:30 7:40 10:00

Showtimes for 5/27 thru 6/2

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first things first

coulter

And they’re such a damn waste of time, too MICHAEL COULTER • CONTRIBUTING WRITER

I was on student council

in high school.This is more an indictment on the quality of leadership in those days than it is a feather in my cap. I’m sure this will come as quite a surprise, but I didn’t really do much besides make smartassed comments and hit on smart girls who were trying their best to ignore me. I didn’t give a frog’s fat ass what happened at homecoming. I cared even less about having bake sales so we could buy a new dictionary for the library or goggles for the science club. (I mean, there’s a big difference between temporarily blind and permanently blind.)

Student council sort of sucked, but I’m glad I did it now. It got me used to meetings.

As a general rule, meetings, whether at work or socially, are a complete waste of time more often than not. Microsoft did a survey to determine the top time-wasters at work and, not surprising to anyone, 32 percent of the folks surveyed named pointless meetings as the top time-waster. Each person estimated spending 5.6 hours per week in meetings. Holy crap, 5.6 hours? That’s more time than I spend a week self-gratifying. I mean, seriously, a whole lot more time, and it seems like that’s all I do.

Um, anyway, back to the meeting thing.

Actually, I’m surprised more time isn’t spent on meetings. For something that is so uniformly despised, there still seems to be quite a lot of them. Maybe it gives everyone comfort to come together and meet. There is power in numbers. I mean, what if a snowstorm stranded us in this room for the next 30 days and we had to get all Donner Party on the situation. I bet we’d be happy there were several of us in the room for a meeting at that juncture.

The key word to the survey, though, was “pointless.â€? For example, I once attended a meeting where the sole purpose was to plan the time of our next meeting. Not only is that pointless, it’s also just absurd. “Well, we’re all here for the meeting today, so it might be best if we work on a date for the next meeting, because, well, it’s really hard to get us all in the room at the same time.â€? It’s like a snake eating its own tail ‌ maybe. I’m not sure I ever really understood that analogy.

It’s tough to hold people’s attention during a meeting.The worst is when the leader calls on you to make a suggestion or comment. “Jimmy, what are your thoughts on

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"A GOOD ESSAY IS 10% INSPIRATION, 15% PERSPIRATION, AND 75% DESPERATION."

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the new plan?�The response you would like to give is,“Well, piss, I don’t know. Like virtually everyone else in the room, I wasn’t paying the first freaking bit of attention.

What the hell is this, second grade?� This statement isn’t appropriate in such situations, so you’re forced to bullshit, just like second grade.“Um, I can see the pluses and the minuses, more pluses than minuses, but still some of each. It’s not something we should rush into, I don’t think. We should have many more meetings on the subject to be sure of our direction.�

Personally, I like a meet- Michael Coulter ing where you get a bunch is a videographof hand-outs. Otherwise, I er, comedian end up creating little doo- and all around dles on my own pieces of smartass. But paper. “Oh good, Jerry read his column handed out a sheet with pie anyway. It’s graphs on it. I bet I can turn damn funny. those into smiley faces with a little creativity.� I swear, every time I look at my notes from a meeting they are always the same. I carefully write the date at the top of the page. Next I write down the topic of the meeting.After that, the meeting actually starts and I begin by drawing a few cubes on the page, then maybe a cartoon head with a caption coming out of his mouth that says, “This meeting sucks balls,� followed by a picture of a monkey with a cigarette in his mouth.

The meeting ends and I tear off the top sheet of paper and toss it in the garbage on my way out ‌ unless I drew a really cool monkey, in which case I’ll tack in on my bulletin board.

Even socially, meeting with your friends for a specific purpose other than simply to get intoxicated is usually a stupid endeavor. “Hey, let’s have a meeting and figure out what we’re gonna do for the party next weekend.� A meeting such as this is usually held in a bar. The party planners sit at a table, have a few pops and talk about general crap. Eventually, someone will be ready to leave, so in the last three minutes of the meeting, someone will offer to bring ice.

Someone else will offer to bring liquor, someone else beer.The meeting is now officially over with only three productive minutes to show for all the effort.

I’m sure there have been productive meetings. I’m sure there have been meetings that bring everyone together, meetings that produce results, meetings that are invaluable to the quality of work. I’m sure there are meetings that aren’t pointless. I gotta say though, I’ve never been to one.

“The Whole Family Loves to ReadBuzz.com�

No.

Rules.

Radio.

wpgu.com I N T R O | A R O U N D T O W N | L I S T E N , H E A R | M A I N E V E N T | A R T S & E N T E R TA I N M E N T | T H E S I LV E R S C R E E N | T H E S T I N G E R | C L A S S I F I E D S

4 •

buzz weekly

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MA Y 26

OUT TO LUNCH: IF NOT BACK BY FIVE, OUT FOR DINNER ALSO.

chuck shepherd

LEAD STORY Air Travel Blues: (1) In March, a woman suffered a midflight heart attack, leading the KLM pilot to emergency-land at Heathrow Airport in London, but she died before an ambulance could arrive. Six months earlier, Heathrow officials had eliminated costly standby ambulances, resulting in the woman’s plane being met by a paramedic on a bicycle (which carried some emergency equipment but not nearly as much as an ambulance).

(2) In a major incident on Feb. 11, security officers at Dublin International Airport “booted” (in Ireland, clamped) an ambulance at a terminal entrance, even though it was parked in an area reserved for emergency vehicles; a patient with serious injuries was delayed until paramedics paid cash to have the boot removed.

BRIGHT IDEAS The East Valley Tribune reported in April that the police department in Mesa, Ariz., was still awaiting word about its $100,000 federal grant request to buy and train a capuchin monkey for its SWAT team. Capuchins are now used as assistance animals for the disabled, in that they can be taught to fetch things off of shelves, and the police want to see if one can be trained to unlock doors and search buildings on command. The Pentagon’s visionary research agency, DARPA, is considering the proposal.

Silver Bullet Bar 1401 E. Washington, U. www.silverbulletbar.net 344-0937 BEST BAR IN CHAMPAIGN-URBANA BEST DJ’S AND MUSIC - BEST DRINK SPECIALS

Monday - $2 Domestic Beers Tuesday - $2 Rum & Coke Wednesday - $2.50 Screwdrivers Thursday - $2 Amaretto Stone Sours FREE POOL 8PM-9PM FEMALE DANCERS NIGHTLY

Life is either a daring adventure ... or nothing.

Dorothy Parker • Author

ing room in the middle of a procedure in order to cash a check at a nearby bank.

(Subsequently, Arndt was also charged with cocaine possession and sexual abuse of a minor.) In April 2005, prominent Boston plastic surgeon Joseph Upton stepped away from the operating room during a scheduled break in surgery at Beth Israel Deaconness Medical Center and walked down the street to Children’s Hospital Boston to conduct another surgery that he had double-booked for the time, before returning to Beth Israel and satisfactorily finishing the first job. Both patients are fine, but Dr. Upton was ordered not to double-book in the future and not to leave the floor during surgeries.

CREME DE LA WEIRD Gregory Withrow and an associate staged a two-man protest at the California state capitol in Sacramento in April against U.S. policies on Iraq and on immigration, and in favor of white supremacy, among other issues. The associate’s role in the protest was to drive 6-inch nails into Withrow’s hands on a cross as he stood as a martyr for six hours. Withrow had brought notes with him from a Butte County, Calif., health official (seemingly approving Withrow’s plan to hurt himself) and from the Sacramento Parks Department (affirming that no permit was needed for such a protest).

THE CONTINUING CRISIS Among the items cleared by senior Israeli rabbis as kosher for Passover this year, according to reports in the Jerusalem Post: the erectile-dysfunction drug Viagra (provided the pill is placed in special gelatin capsules before Passover begins). [New York Times, 4-15-05]

RECURRING THEMES In 2002, Boston surgeon David Arndt had his license suspended after he left the operat-

J U N . 1 , 2 OO5

The cure for boredom is curiosity.

There is no cure for curiosity.

y o u r e v e r y d a y n e w s but hell, we’re weekly

nEwS oF thE wEiRd

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COPYRIGHT 2004 Chuck Shepherd Distributed by Universal Press Syndicate

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Study: Children adopted from foreign countries adjust well A

abroad have been widespread in the media, and that may have skewed perceptions of these children.

The analysis involved studies on adoption between 1950 and 2005, involving more than 30,000 adoptees and more than 100,000 nonadopted children.

During that time, adoption has evolved from being a "shameful secret" to being celebrated and often very visible, especially with the relatively recent phenomenon of white parents adopting Chinese children, according to editorial author Dr. Laurie C. Miller of Tufts-New England Medical Center. In the United States alone, parents have adopted more than 230,000 children from other countries since 1989, she said.

Behavior problems were relatively uncommon among all children studied, but internationally adopted children had a 20 percent higher chance of being disruptive than nonadopted children, and a 10 percent higher chance of being anxious or withdrawn. They also were twice as likely as nonadopted children to receive mental health services.

Children adopted within their own countries had an 36 percent higher chance of being anxious or withdrawn than the international adoptees did, and a 50 percent higher chance of being aggressive or disruptive, the study found.

These children also were four times more likely than nonadopted children and twice as likely as internationally adopted children to receive mental health services. Also, domestically adopted youngsters had a 60 percent higher chance of having behavior problems than nonadopted children.

Some of the results probably reflect the parents who adopt foreign children, said Dr. Gregory Plemmons of Vanderbilt University's clinic for international adoptees. These parents often are high-achieving and financially well-off, and tend to seek out services like counseling for their children, Plemmons said.

Also, children adopted domestically may suffer from the instability of living with different foster families before getting adopted, Plemmons said.

OPEN Monday - Thursday 8pm-1am Friday-Saturday 8pm-2am Ladies & Couples Welcome Always Free Admission with our T-Shirt ATM $5.00 Admission/Ladies Free Accepted MUST BE 21

I N T R O | A R O U N D T O W N | L I S T E N , H E A R | M A I N E V E N T | A R T S & E N T E R TA I N M E N T | T H E S I LV E R S C R E E N | T H E S T I N G E R | C L A S S I F I E D S

s o u n d s

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a s t r o l o g y

ARIES

ASSOCIATED PRESS • CHICAGO

new study disputes the notion that children adopted from other countries tend to be badly damaged emotionally because of the hardships they had to endure.

The analysis of more than 50 years of international data found that these youngsters are only slightly more likely than nonadopted children to have behavioral problems such as aggressiveness and anxiety. And they seem to have fewer problems than children adopted within their own countries.

"Our findings may help them fight the stereotype that is often associated with international adoption," said researchers Femmie Juffer and Marinus H. van IJzendoorn of Leiden University in the Netherlands.

They pooled results from 137 studies on adoptions by parents living in the United States, Canada, Europe, Australia, New Zealand and Israel.

In the study, adopted children in general had more behavior problems than nonadopted youngsters, regardless of where the adoption took place—a result that is not surprising, since both groups often suffer deprivation and come from broken families.

But with backgrounds that often include abandonment, orphanages and civil strife, foreign adoptees are sometimes thought of as difficult, disruptive children—an image that the study does not support, the researchers said.

The results are generally reassuring for international adoption—an increasing phenomenon involving more than 40,000 children a year moving among more than 100 countries, the researchers said.

"Before adoption, most international adoptees experience insufficient medical care, malnutrition, maternal separation, and neglect and abuse in orphanages," the researchers said. But to their surprise, they found that these children do well and are largely able to catch up with their nonadopted counterparts.

The study appears in Wednesday's Journal of the American Medical Association.

A JAMA editorial said sensationalized stories about severely disturbed children adopted from

-Helen Keller

s c e n e

(March 21-April 19)

A judge in Los Angeles was peeved when a potential juror let out a loud yawn during the jury selection process. "I'm sorry, but I'm really bored," the man confessed. The judge found him in contempt and fined him $100. Similarly, Aries, the universe will find you in contempt if you let yourself get sucked into activities that dull your senses, shut down your curiosity, or numb your lust for life. This week it's your sacred duty to seek out only the most interesting stimuli.

TAU RU S

(April 20-May 20)

Most towns in Ghana have no street names, and the houses have no numbers. It's hard to find where people live if you've never visited them before. This is a good metaphor for an issue I want to bring to your attention, Taurus. There's a certain part of your life that has never been mapped, let alone organized. And yet it's not at all wild; in fact, it's like a bustling village where the streets have no names. It's high time you brought some order and discipline to this place.

GEMINI

(May 21-June 20)

Film actor Gianni Russo, best known for his portrayal of wise guys, has fathered 11 children with 10 different women. He'll be both your role model and anti-role model in the coming weeks, Gemini. Like him, your fertility will be abundant. Unlike him, you should focus this huge gift with precision and discrimination. Please don't work on any more than two brainchildren at a time.

CANCER

(June 21-July 22)

Research on newly discovered fragments of ancient New Testament texts reveals that Christian fundamentalists have been working under an erroneous assumption. The number of the Beast is not 666, as right-wing prophets of the apocalypse have long believed. The correct figure is actually 616. I mention this, Cancerian, because your ideas about enemies and evil are

what ’s your sign?

also about to undergo a revision. Freed from an illusion, you will at first be sad, then relieved, then confused, then elated.

LEO

(July 23-Aug. 22)

I have a dream that in the New World, everyone will be paid in direct proportion to how much beauty they create. There'll be an affirmative action program that ultimately makes most of us celebrities. Buddhist real estate developers will build a chain of sacred shopping centers in the heartland. The CEOs of the richest companies will be required by law to enjoy oncea-week sessions with Jungian psychotherapists. In the New World, April Fool's Day will come once a month. There'll be scientific horoscopes and mystical logic. Every one of us will have at least one imaginary friend. Compassion will be an aphrodisiac. Pioneers in artificial intelligence will develop computers that can talk to God. That's my vision of the New World, Leo. What's yours? It's a perfect moment to imagine your personal vision of utopia.

VIRGO

(Aug. 23-Sept. 22)

You've probably never heard of one of the greatest heroes of the last 100 years. Virgo microbiologist Maurice Hilleman (1919-2005) developed vaccines for measles, pneumonia, meningitis, hepatitis, and many other diseases. The Guardian said he saved more lives in the 20th century than anyone else. And yet, as is all-too-typical for Virgos, he never got anywhere near the acclaim he deserved. Having said that, I believe the coming weeks will depart from the astrological norm. Many of you Virgos will get much more of the recognition and rewards you have earned but never before received.

LIBRA

(Sept. 23-Oct. 22)

We're all in the closet in one way or another. Every one of us feels that there's some part of ourselves we've got to hide; that if we reveal the totality of who we really are, we will suffer. For example, U.S. Army Sgt. Robert Stout, who was wounded and got a Purple Heart for his service in Iraq, ulti-

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mately decided he was tired of being secret about his homosexuality. As a result, he can't re-enlist, even though he'd like to. My psychotherapist friend Alicia has always used astrology in her practice, but only recently chose to be open about it.

Some of her colleagues broke off relations when she told them. According to my reading of the omens, Libra, it's an ideal time to carefully come out of whatever closet you've been in. I'm not saying there'll be no repercussions; just that you'll have clarity and strength as you deal with them. And the freedom you create with your brave revelation will change everything for the better.

SCORPIO

(Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

One of Sesame Street's most recognizable characters is Cookie Monster. After years of feasting on all the cookies he wanted, the fuzzy blue puppet has recently been forced to limit his intake. In an effort to teach kids better eating habits, the show's producers even require Cookie Monster to sing a song called, "A Cookie Is a Sometimes Food." I vociferously protest this action. Born November 2, Cookie Monster is a Scorpio, and Scorpios shouldn't be compelled to tone down their desires as long as their desires aren't hurting anyone. You're on this earth to explore your cravings, to be led by your cravings to the frontiers of understanding. That's the only way they can teach you all they have to teach. Now go and commune with as many cookies (or your personal equivalent) as you need to.

S AG I T TA R I U S

(Nov. 22-Dec.21)

In the film 3-Iron, a man and woman meet and become lovers without ever speaking. They maintain their per fect silence even as they glide through a series of adventures, forging a sly, resilient harmony. Their romance provides a "fresh, confident vision of love as a kind of Buddhist refuge," reported *The Week.* While I don't recommend that you take up their model of intimacy forever, Sagittarius, I do think it's a per fect time to try it out for a brief period.

Do you dare? Spend a day or even a few hours with the person you're closest to without ever saying a word to each other. (Nonsense sounds are permissible.)

Homework: To get ready for a Summer of Love, write your ultimate personal ad. Address it to your current partner if you're already paired. Share it with me at www.freewillastrology.com.

CAPRICORN

(Dec. 22-Jan. 19)

California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger has no tolerance for his children's carelessness with their dirty clothes. His wife Maria Schriver says that if he finds the kids' pajamas and t-shirts lying around, he simply burns them. I urge you to take a page out of the Terminator's book, Capricorn. It's an excellent time to throw parts of your wardrobe into the fire--especially things that may still look OK but no longer suit your style.

You know what I mean: the clothes that remind you of the person you used to be but no longer are. Once you've got the blaze started, why not fling in a bunch of other stuff that's outdated, worn out, and weighing you down?

AQUARIUS

(Jan. 20-Feb. 18)

Last fall, millions of Ukrainians waged the "orange revolution."

Wearing orange scarves as their symbol of solidarity, they peacefully overturned the results of the rigged presidential election. Citizens of the ex-Soviet republic of Georgia had their own nonviolent insurrection in 2003, wielding bouquets of roses as they toppled their chief tyrant during the "rose revolution." I hereby proclaim the coming week to be the launch of the Aquarian tribe's "seed revolution." Inspired by the metaphor of the seed, you will weed out the rotting status quo and plant your seed-like ideas everywhere you go. Carry a packet of seeds with you at all times. What kind? Doesn't matter: pumpkin, wildflower, magic beans, or anything that excites your imagination.

PISCES

(Feb. 19-March 20)

In 2004 the U.S. federal government gave $2.2 billion to the 50 states, directing them to spend the money to defend against terrorism. So far, though, 86 percent of the donation remains unused. Many of the states can't seem to decide how to allocate the funds. This problem reminds me of a situation in your life, Pisces. You, too, have been blessed with a sizable endowment that you have not taken full advantage of. Is this the week you change all that? It might help to figure out the reasons why you have not yet understood the true purpose of gift.

jonesin crossword puzzle Across 1 Pull out prematurely 5 Warning notices 11 Heated start?

14 ___ extra cost 15 Makes over 16 Use a slip stitch, e.g.

17 Hook two balloons together at the end, bend slightly 19 Little rapscallion 20 Suck the energy from 21 Little cut 22 Rib in a bedframe 23 History books 25 Juicy part of a flower 27 Take a pink balloon, twist it in the middle, then twist at both ends 30 Unmatched, like socks 33 Don on the radio 34 Like Modest Mouse and Cake, at one time 35 Word before vacation 37 Like some hedgehogs 40 Well-mannered guy 41 Borden spokescow s o u n d s

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43 "Snug as ___..."

45 Football positions: abbr.

46 Blow up two green balloons almost all the way...and you're done 50 Vehicle for short flights 51 Candle store choices 55 Kill the dragon 56 Shapely suffix?

59 Oldest of the Hawaiian Islands 60 "Tic ___ Dough" 61 Take two balloons, hold them side by side, then twist the whole thing in the middle 63 Fig. on an inventory 64 Leaning type 65 Tandoor, e.g.

66 ___ Tafari, a.k.a. Haile Selassie 67 Mythical man-beasts 68 Tom and Meg's "You've Got Mail" director Down 1 Session with a podium, maybe s c e n e

2 Mazda maneuver 3 Bobby Ray who withdrew a Secretary of Defense bid under Clinton 4 He tried to join the Blue Man Group on "Arrested Development" 5 Abbr. in jazz fake books 6 Not so much 7 Idyllic place 8 Activity for some reporters 9 Conical domicile 10 ID on a 1040 11 Sleep around out of wedlock 12 Making comments 13 Math groups with no members 18 Former Chinese prime minister Zhou ___ 22 "Ten Summoner's Tales" singer 24 Kid's math homework 26 151, to Claudius 28 Short greeting with a nod

29 From Fuzhou or Fukuoka 30 Pavarotti or Stratas 31 Title given to fourteen Tibetans 32 Throws off 36 Little tune 38 The Grizzlies are part of it 39 Sounds stand-up comics elicit 42 Pam's follower?

44 Lizard that can make chirping noises 47 Bet predicting first and second place 48 React dispiritedly to 49 DVD box set division, maybe 52 New, in Naples 53 Guy who works with whips and chairs 54 Tourist city of Tuscany 57 Airport near Paris 58 Film ___ 61 Sorority letters 62 Hip-hop figures Answers on pg. 13

I N T R O | A R O U N D T O W N | L I S T E N , H E A R | M A I N E V E N T | A R T S & E N T E R TA I N M E N T | T H E S I LV E R S C R E E N | T H E S T I N G E R | C L A S S I F I E D S

PHONE: 217/337-8337 • DEADLINE: 2 p.m. Tuesday for the next edition.

Services

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INDEX 000 100 200 300 400 500 600 700 800 900

• PLEASE CHECK YOUR AD! Report errors immediately by calling 337-8337. We cannot be responsible for more than one day’s incorrect insertion if you do not notify us of the error by 2 pm on the day of the first insertion.

• All advertising is subject to the approval of the publisher. The Daily Illini shall have the right to revise, reject or cancel, in whole or in part, any advertisement, at any time.

• All employment advertising in this newspaper is subject to the City of Champaign Human Rights Ordinance and similar state and local laws, making it illegal for any person to cause to be published any advertisement which expresses limitation, specification or discrimination as to race, color, mental handicap, personal appearance, sexual orientation, family responsibilities, political affiliation, prior arrest or conviction record, source of income, or the fact that such person is a student.

• Specification in employment classifications are made only where such factors are bonafide occupational qualifications necessary for employment.

• All real estate advertising in this newspaper is subject to the Federal Fair Housing Act of 1968, and similar state and local laws which make it illegal for any person to cause to be published any advertisement relating to the transfer, sale, rental, or lease of any housing which expresses limitation, specifications or discrimination as to race, color, creed, class, national origin, religion, sex, age, marital status, physical or mental handicap, personal appearance, sexual oientation, family responsibilities, political affiliation, or the fact that such person is a student.

• This newspaper will not knowingly accept any advertising for real estate that is in violation of the law. Our readers are informed that all dwellings advertised in this newspaper are available on an equal oppportunity basis.

DEADLINE:

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Action Ads • 20 words, run any 5 days (in buzz or The Daily Illini), $14 • 10 words, run any 5 days (in buzz or The Daily Illini), $7 • add a photo to an action ad, $10

Employment 000 HELP WANTED

020

Part Time ATTENTION STUDENTS $9 per hour to start.

Earn up to $15 per hour.

No Experience required 25 positions available Full time/ part time 1-800-809-8775

030

HELP WANTED Full/Part Time

Camp Counselors- Gain valuable expreience while having the summer of a lifetime. Counelors needed for Outdoor Adventure, Arts, Aquatics, and more in the Pocono Mountains of Pennsylvania. Apply online at www.pineforestcamp.com

Help wanted for apartment inspections in August. Apply at: Campus Property Management 303 E. Green 328-3030.

BUSINESS SERVICES

110

Mentor and critic for literary and visual arts. $25/hr. 217-417-0233

$8.25/HR. STARTING Office and Warehouse Associate.

Flexible hours, Meyer Drapery 330 N. Neil. Downtown Champaign. Apply in person or send resume. 3525318.

Earn $5000 as an egg donor. Must be 20-29 and a non-smoker. Please call Alternative Reproductive Resources at 773-327-7315 or 847446-1001 to learn how you can help a family fulfill its dreams.

Merchandise 200 FOR SALE

285

Transportation 300 310

www.lookatusedcars.com

Apartments

400

Property Management

Fall 2005 Apartments • Efficiencies 1103 S. Euclid 312 E. White • 1 Bedrooms 508 S. First 108 W. Charles 310 E. Clark 106 E. Armory 312 E. White 105 S. Fourth 104 E. John 103 E. Stoughton 103 E. Healey 108 1/2 E. Daniel 507 S. Elm, C Call for an appointment

351-1767

www.johnsonrentals.com rentals@johnsonrentals.com

APARTMENTS

• 2 Bedrooms 308 E. Armory 1103 S. Euclid 312 E. White 104 E. John 103 E. Stoughton 105 S. Fourth 210/208 E. White 312 E. White • 3 Bedrooms 1103 S. Euclid 807 S. Locust 210/208 E. White 312 E. White 104 E. John • 4 Bedrooms 807 S. Locust 210/208 E. White

410

Furnished/Unfurnished 1 bedroom lofts $497 2 bedrooms $545 3 bedrooms $650 4 bedrooms $1000 Campus, parking.

Fall 04, 367-6626

713 S. Randolph,C. Now renting for Fall.

Spacious, 2 & 3 bedrooms from $618.

Near campus, downtown Champaign. Includes cable, parking, water. Has laundry facilities and seasonal pool.

Quality apartments and houses for rent

APARTMENTS

420

BEST VALUE 1 BR. loft from $480.

1 Br. $370 2 BR. $470 3 BR. $750 4 BR $755 Campus. 367-6626.

1 Bedroom

1, 2, 3, 4 bedroom apartments Available now Gabe’s Place 359-0700 www.GabesPlace.com

Quiet Luxury Apartments New Security Building

Beckman View Apts.

Efficiencies. Available now and Fall 2005. Secured building. Private parking. Laundry on site, ethernet available. Office at 309 S. First, Ch. THE UNIVERSITY GROUP www.ugroup96.com 352-3182

1006 S. 3RD, C.

Aug 2005. 1 bedroom. Location, location. Covered parking & laundry, furnished & patios, ethernet available. Office at 309 S. First, Ch. THE UNIVERSITY GROUP www.ugroup96.com 352-3182

105 E. John

NO BULL!

Free Best Buy and Campus Tan gift certificate with each signed lease!

Remodeled apartments that redefine campus living.

3 and 4 bedroom apartments available at 810 S. Oak St. between John and Daniel in Champaign.

3 bedroom apartment at $999/mo. (only $333 per roommate!)

4 bedroom apartment at $999/mo. (less than $250 per roommate!)

High-speed internet, water, and trash included!

Laundry in building.

Available Fall 2005. 1& 2 bedroom furnished, great location. Includes parking.

THE UNIVERSITY GROUP www.ugroup96.com 352-3182 207 Wright Engineering Very Large, New 1 Bedroom apt.

Free parking. www.ugroup96.com 352-3182 or (217)841-3028

304 & 306 E. Clark, C Castle Apartments

217-384-6930

3 blocks to Engineering Quad. 3 BR $670, 4 BR $890. C/A, ceiling fan, dishwasher, washer/dryer in unit.

384-1099, castle_apartments@ameritech.net

DI CLASSIFIEDS

307 & 310 E. White 307 & 309 Clark

NINE MONTH LEASES NEGOTIABLE www.johnsmithproperties.com

Unlocking the door to your perfect apartment.

420

Furnished

1005 S. SECOND, C

Don’t get stuck with only those highpriced apartments left for Fall. Wellmaintained 2- bedroom furnished apartments near Beckman and Engineering. Dishwasher, AC, ethernet and off-street parking available. $595- $630/mo. 493-8487

J U N . 1 , 2 OO5

APARTMENTS

Furnished

Available Now. 2 bedroom on campus. $550 per month. 367-6626.

COURTYARD ON RANDOLPH

217-352-8540 217-355-4608 (evenings) www.faronproperties.com

• Many pet-friendly locations • Furnished AND Unfurnished units • 9 month leases negotiable at some locations

410

LIKE NEW! DJ Equipment for Sale.

Pioneer, Denon, Vestax Mixers. Denon CD Players. Vestax PDX 2000.

Alesis Air FX. Coffins and heavy duty Cases. 217-344-3751. http://mamboitaliano.us/4sale/

AUTOMOBILES

Johnson Rentals

APARTMENTS Furnished/Unfurnished

Summer Jobs

•

605 E. Clark St., C. Furnished, washer/dryer, A/C, balcony, dishwasher, intercom, ethernet, microwave, covered parking. www.mhmproperties.com 337-8852

Fall 2005. Large studio, double closet, well furnished. Secured building. $320/month. Available June 1 and August ‘05.

THE UNIVERSITY GROUP www.ugroup96.com 352-3182 or 841-3028

I N T R O | A R O U N D T O W N | L I S T E N , H E A R | M A I N E V E N T | A R T S & E N T E R TA I N M E N T | T H E S I LV E R S C R E E N | T H E S T I N G E R | C L A S S I F I E D S

4 4 5

509 E. White, C.

| 9 - 11 |

6 7 8

Aug. 2005. Large 1 bedrooms. Security entry, balconies, patios, furnished. Laundry, off-street parking, ethernet available. Office at 309 S. First, Ch. THE UNIVERSITY GROUP www.ugroup96.com 352-3182

9 10 10 10

604 E. White, C. Security Entrance For Fall 2005, Large 1 bedroom furnished, balconies, patios, laundry, off-street parking, ethernet available.

Phone 352-3182. Office at 309 S. First, C. THE UNIVERSITY GROUP www.ugroup96.com

Unique 1 & 2 bedroom apartments.

All furnished, laundry, internet, and parking available. Must see!!

THE UNIVERSITY GROUP www.ugroup96.com 352-3182

11 11

| 12 - 15 | 12 14

705 W. Main, U

15

Newer 2 BR $690/mo 1 block from Lincoln Laundry, free parking, A/C The Weiner Companies, Ltd.

15

| 16 - 17 |

384-8018

602 E. Stoughton

CALL US AT (217) 384-6930 VIEW OUR LISTINGS @ www.johnsmithproperties.com

2

|6-8|

Security Building

• On-campus or off-campus • Excellent Tenant Union record • Weekend/evening showings by appointment

2

506 E. Stoughton, C

1 and 2 Bedroom Apartments

502 E. University, C. Quiet Building. Huge bedrooms, AC, furnished, parking, Aug. 05.

369-0237. www.zhengrentals.com

2

For August 2005. Extra large efficiency apartments. Security building entry, complete furniture, laundry, off-street parking, ethernet available.

Office at 309 S. First, Champaign.

THE UNIVERSITY GROUP www.ugroup96.com 352-3182

BECKMAN APTS.

16

17 17

6 0 1 -6 0 3 E . C la rk, C .

F u rn ish e d 1 B R w /b a lco n y, la u n d ry, so m e fre e u til.

2 m in . fro m th e U n io n .

S ta rtin g a t $ 3 8 5 .

344-1306 or 352-4104

| 18 - 20 | 18 19

DELUXE 2 BR

20

309 N. Busey, U. August of 2005. Fully furnished, W/D, ethernet and parking available.

Close to Beckman. $595/mo. Call Chris anytime, 841-1996 or 403-1523

20 20

| 21 | Located just two blocks from the University of Illinois • Easy walking distance to Krannert Center, Engineering Campus, and the Illini Union.

• Also right on the MTD Green Line for easy bus access.

Each Unit Features • Washer/Dryer • Furnished • Broadband Internet • Balcony or Patio • Granite Countertops • and Much More!!!

• Dishwasher

Prices start at only $995 per month

s o u n d s

3

uNDER c OVER

Now & Fall 2005 2 and 3 bedrooms. Furnished with internet. Parking and laundry available. On-site resident manager. Call Kenny, 493-0429.

THE UNIVERSITY GROUP www.ugroup96.com 352-3182

502 W. Green 4 bedroom. 2 bath. Fireplace, W/D, A/C. $1160/mo. 217-721-5670.

buzz weekly •

SIGN ON BABY'S BIB: SPIT HAPPENS

503- 505- 508 E. White

www.weinercompanies.com

Furnished

J U N . 1 , 2 OO5

11

3rd and Clark August ‘05 beautiful, furnished 2, 3, and 4 bedroom apts. Ted 766-5108.

420

•

|1-5|

408 E. Clark, C. For August. 1 BR near Beckman. Includes parking, trash. $500/mo.

Campo Rental Agency. 344-1927

APARTMENTS

MA Y 26

Furnished one bedrooms and efficiencies from $325, $365, and $395 near John and Second or Healey and Third. 356-1407.

21 21

GREAT VALUE

| 22 - 23 |

306- 308- 309 White August 2005. 1 & 3 Bedroom furnished apts. Balconies, patios, laundry, dishwashers, off-street parking, ethernet available. 352-3182, 8411996, 309 S. First.

The University Group www.ugroup96.com

INTRO

under the cover

Editor’s Note This Modern World • Tom Tomorrow Life in Hell • Matt Groening News of the Weird • Chuck Shephard AP News Story First Things First • Michael Coulter

AROUND TOWN Sewing the Pieces Together • Erin Scottberg q + a with Nora Sage The Local Sniff • Seth Fein

LISTEN, HEAR Jeff Coffin interview • Kyle Gorman The Raveonettes review • Frank Krolicki The Raveonettes review • Todd J. Hunter Parasol Charts Sound Ground #77 • Todd J. Hunter The Hurly-Burley • Cornelia Boonman Mofro review • Susan Schomburg

MAIN EVENT Buzz Picks Calendar listings Art and Theater Listings Bob n’ Dave • Dave King

ARTS + ENTERTAINMENT Student art Displayed at Krannert Museum • Austin Happel & David Ruthenberg (Th)ink • Keef Knight Artist’s Corner with Katie Richardson

THE SILVER SCREEN Revenge of the Sith review • Andy Vecelas Star Wars reflections • Various writers Movie time listings Slowpoke • Jen Sorenson Drive Through Reviews

PHOTO • CONTRIBUTED BY JEANNINE BESTOSO

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HELP WANTED

Employment Services Merchandise Transportation Apartments Other Housing/Rent Real Estate for Sale Things To Do Announcements Personals

MA Y 26

NO MORE RHYMES NOW, I MEAN IT ... ANYBODY WANT A PEANUT?

THE

22 • b u z z w e e k l y

“Crown of Frustration” by Jeanninie Bestoso is on display at Creation Art Studios and Gallery through June 5. p. 15

THE STINGER Free Will Astrology Jonesin’ Crosswords • Matt Gaffney

CLASSIFIEDS

Parkview Apartments 121 W. Park, Urbana Efficiency apartments for fall. Includes water, trash removal, on-site laundry. $395/mo. Campo Rental Agency 344-1927.

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I N T R O | A R O U N D T O W N | L I S T E N , H E A R | M A I N E V E N T | A R T S & E N T E R TA I N M E N T | T H E S I LV E R S C R E E N | T H E S T I N G E R | C L A S S I F I E D S

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buzz weekly

MA Y 26

BEAUTY IS IN THE EYE OF THE BEER HOLDER.

EDITOR’S NOTE PAUL WAGNER • EDITOR IN CHIEF

The thing I miss most about

living at home with my parents is the food. I LOVE food.

Love it. Especially free food. It doesn’t even have to be especially good; if it’s free, I’ll eat it.And food that I don’t have to cook, that’s always good, too.

My parents still insist on eating dinner as a family every night, and I used to think this was silly, what with my sister and I being so involved in sports that dinner could be pushed back to 9 or 10 in the evening. But we always ate together. Full meals, too, and we rarely ate out.The best days were when my dad would barbeque.The man is amazing with a grill. Every weekend we’d have a BBQ at least once, and everyone would be invited.We’re a social family and love company, so friends would always come and mooch off the great free food.

Living in the dorms made me miss the quality of the home-cooked meals; even the bad ones seemed gourmet next to some of the crap they try to feed students in the dorms. But I lived on dorm food for two years, and I turned out OK. Whenever I went home, though, I’d request big, delicious meals because I knew I could get some quality food in me.

But dorm food was prepared for me. My friends and I would head to the dining hall every day around 5:30, grab our food from the buffet style setup, sit at our usual table and eat no longer than 10 minutes after we got there (except for Fat Don’s.We waited a long-ass time for that, and it was worth it).

Nowadays, when I want to eat, I have to pick out and actually cook my own food.

This process can take a long freakin’ time!

And there’s always the dishes. Constantly dishes. So what usually happens is I order out, or I cook food from a box.And no, this food is not that good, nor is it that good for me, but, dammit, it’s quick and easy. Now when I go home, I don’t even care what I eat as long as it’s home-cooked and decent, because it’s WAY better than what I eat on my own. I mean, a boy can only live on Mac ‘n’ Cheese and sandwiches for so long.

- Paul

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APARTMENTS n o . 2 1

Cover Design • Brittany Bindrim Editor in chief • Paul Wagner Art Director • Claire Napier Copy Chief • Erin Green, Nellie Waddell Music • Kyle Gorman Arts • Katie Richardson Film • Andrew Vecelas Community • Erin Scottberg Calendar • Erin Scottberg Photography Editor • David Solana Designers • Brittany Bindrim, Nikita Sorokin Calendar Coordinators • Cassie Conner Photography • Sarah Krohn, Adriana D’Onofrio, Austin Happel Copy Editors • Erin Green, Nellie Waddell Staff Writers • Frank Krolicki, Cornelia Boonman, Todd J. Hunter, Susan Schomberg, Katie Richardson, David Ruthenberg, Randy Ma, Paul Prikazky, David Just, Shadie Elnashai, Alan Bannister Contributing Writers • Michael Coulter, Seth Fein, Logan Moore, Jeff Nelson Production Manager • Meredith Niepert Sales Manager • Anna Rost Marketing/Distribution • Louis Reeves III Publisher • Mary Cory

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APARTMENTS

Furnished

Furnished

NEAR ENGINEERING CAMPUS

FOR YOUR MONEY!

8/18/05. $340-$370 month Weiner Co. 384-8018 www.weinercompanies.com

$595-$630

2 Bedroom Apts Beckman/Engineering Campus

JOHN STREET APARTMENTS

• dishwasher • furnished • spacious • off-street parking • air conditioned • ethernet access

58 E. John August 2005. Two and three bedrooms, fully furnished. Dishwashers, center courtyard, on-site laundry, central air, ethernet available.

THE UNIVERSITY GROUP www.ugroup96.com 352-3182 Showings Monday-Friday 10-5 Saturday 11-4

307- 309 Healey Court.

Fall 2005. Behind Gully’s. 2 bedrooms. Ethernet available. Office at 309 S. First, C. THE UNIVERSITY GROUP www.ugroup96.com 352-3182 Spacious, sunny Victorian. 1 bedroom & study. Available August.

Year lease. Hardwood floors, laundry, parking. 217-621-6067 Walk one block Krannert, quad.

Great two bedroom, parking, laundry, on bus line. August. 390-6535 or 398-6677.

Unfurnished

New Building “Lofts on John” One bedroom, unfurnished, W/D, dishwasher, opening August 05 $650/mo. Near John and 2nd. Call 356-1407

430

PARK-LIKE SETTING Unf. 2 BR avail. 8/18/05, A/C, laundry, 101 W. Park, Urbana. $500/month.

Weiner Co. 384-8018 www.weinercompanies.com

304 W. Elm, U 2 BR or 1BR w/Study Between campus & Strawberry Fields. parking, A/C, $495/mo.

at 402 East High, Urbana. Close to campus, Lincoln Square, and downtown Urbana.

Available August 1.

Rent $415/month.

352-4918

705 S. RANDOLPH, C 2 BR, Available early June. Near campus and Downtown Champaign. $510/ mo. 352-8540 www.faronproperties.com

Avail. Fall. $465- $475/mo.

Includes most utilities, laundry, pkg, A/C. On busline.

The Weiner Companies, Ltd 384-8018 www.weinercompanies.com

Convenient 1 bedrooms near downtown Champaign now available.

From $390.

508 W. Hill, C. 511 W. University, C. 515 W. Washington, C. These and other apartment locations also available for leases starting throughout the summer. 352-8540, p.m. 355-4608 www.faronproperties.com

e-mail:

buzz@readbuzz.com write:

57 E. Green St. Champaign, IL 61820

48 E. John, C.

call:

52 E. Armory, C.

1, 2

57 E. John, C.

1, 2

217.337.3801 We reserve the right to edit submissions. Buzz will not publish a letter without the verbal consent of the writer prior to publication date.

First copy of Buzz is FREE, each additional copy is $.50

© Illini Media Company 2005

4

103 E. Chalmers, C.

2

105 S. Wright, C.

4

106, 107, 108 E. Healey, C. 107 E. Springfield (new gym), C.

1, 2 1, 2, 3

106 S. Gregory, U.

4

108 N. Busey, U.

2 (house)

306-510 E. Michigan, U.

1, 2, 3

401 W. Springfield, U.

4

402 N. Gregory, U.

2

406 Elm/201 Grove, U.

1

502, 504 W. Elm, U.

Studio, 1

506 W. Elm, U.

1, 2

301 E. Clark, C.

1, 2

404 E. Clark, C.

3

405 E. Stoughton, C.

3

503 E. Stoughton, C.

3

507 S. Fourth, C.

2

510 E. White, C.

2

1010 W. Stoughton (new), U.

608 E. White, C.

3

1102 E. Colorado, U.

903, 909 S. Locust

4

1301 Harding/1302 Brighton (new), U.

1106 S. Euclid, C.

2

1806 Cottage Grove (new), U.

2302 W. John (brand new), C.

1, 2 1, 2

804 W. Illinois, U.

3

809, 813 W. Springfield, U.

2, 3, 4

809 W. Stoughton, U.

2

812 W. Nevada, U.

2

905, 907 W. Oregon, U. 1009 W. Stoughton, U.

2, 3 Studio, 2, 4

2008 S. Vawter, U.

303 E. Green, Champaign www.cpm-apts.com cpm@cpm-apts.com Office Hours: Mon-Thurs: 9-6, Fri: 9-5, Sat: 11-3 s o u n d s

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STATELY BUILDING LARGE 2 BEDROOM 2 BR plus sunroom Avail. Fall 2005 hwd floors, laundry, parking $900/month includes heat, water & trash

hdwd floors, A/C, pkg, w/d hookups $515/month

The Weiner Companies, Ltd.

603 West Green, U The Weiner Companies,Ltd 384-8018 www.weinercompanies.com

SUBLETS

2, 3 2, 3, 4 1 2, 3 2, 3, 4

440

1 BR. Available Now. Parking included. 6th & Stoughton. $400/mo plus utilities. 630-205-4889 AVAILABLE NOW 1 BR loft apartment. Champaign. $380/mo. 773-821-0192.

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Other Rentals 500

Things to Do 700

HOUSES

Announcements800

510

2 bedroom and 7 bedroom house on campus for Fall 2005. 367-6626.

2 BR house. Quiet Champaign location. Lots of amenities. $645/mo.

217-637-0806.

506 W. Springfield August ‘05. 6 bedroom, 2.5 bath furnished home. Huge, beautiful, hardwood, parking. Ted 766-5108.

617 W. CHURCH Beautiful 6 BR 3 Bath furnished home. Hardwood floors, two porches, off-street parking and more. Only $2100/mo. 369-0500.

Eight to Nine Bedroom Fall, Campus, $2850 367-6626 FREE IPOD SHUFFLE TO EACH TENANT! 2 houses. 3 1/2 blocks from quad.

606 & 608 E. Stoughton. 8 bedroom, 3 bath. Available June 1, 2005. $2000/mo, $2000/mo. plus utilities.

Free parking. (630)205-4889.

LOST & FOUND

810

Lost 1/10th size violin one block west of the Music Building, reward $100. Call 586-7200.

read buzz then RECYCLE

Residential Area & Close to Campus 3 BR w/garage, bsmt

SUBLETS

450

Summer Only

Campus Property Management 328-3030 • www.cpm-apts.com

SUBLETS

460

Summer with Fall Option Beginning of June. Spacious 2 bedroom, 1.5 bath, two balconies. Near campus. Accessible bus stop. $624/mo. Reasonable utility bills.

Opportunity to renew lease. 217621-2970.

Fantastic Sublet Waiting For You! Lease is for summer and next school year up through next Aug. Great location by Hessel park, on bus line. Spacious, well lit 1 bedroom. Laundry room, $465 a month.

Free Parking off street.

Free Water.

Free Garbage/ sewer.

Call 390-6339

384-8018 www.weinercompanies.com

large backyard, porches, laundry, hdwd floors

Furn $1,150/month or Unfurn $1,000/month

The Weiner Companies, Ltd.

1, 2, 3 & 4 BRS GREAT LOCATIONS GREAT PRICES

2, 3

212 E. White, C

105 N. Busey, U

2 BR DUPLEX IN URBANA

430

Unfurnished

Apartment in house

Large 1 BR

TALK TO BUZZ

APARTMENTS

The Weiner Companies,Ltd. 384-8018 www.weinercompanies.com

NEED A 1 BR!

Buzz magazine is a student-run publication of Illini Media Company and does not necessarily represent, in whole or in part, the views of the University of Illinois administration, faculty or students.

I N T R O | A R O U N D T O W N | L I S T E N , H E A R | M A I N E V E N T | A R T S & E N T E R TA I N M E N T | T H E S I LV E R S C R E E N | T H E S T I N G E R | C L A S S I F I E D S

430

APARTMENTS

493-8487

510 S. Elm Available Fall 2005. 2 BR close to campus, hardwood floors, dishwasher, W/D, central air/heat, off street parking, 24 hr. maintenance. $525/mo. 841-1996.

THE UNIVERSITY GROUP www.ugroup96.com 352-3182

APARTMENTS Unfurnished

HEALEY COURT APARTMENTS

Corner of Clark & Gregory

OLD TOWN CHAMPAIGN

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APARTMENTS Furnished

MORE

Furnished efficiency at

503 E. Clark, C., avail.

buzz weekly •

THERE'S A SHORTAGE OF PERFECT BREASTS IN THIS WORLD. IT WOULD BE A PITY TO DAMAGE YOURS.

384-8018 www.weinercompanies.com

ROOMS

530

Room in huge male/female student house near West Side Park and downtown Champaign. $520 per monthly includes utilities, trash, long distance telephone, cable, Ethernet, free Washer/Dryer, private off-street parking, use of large living areas.

Lease & deposit required. Available August 2005. 217-355-2326.

ROOM & BOARD

540

Want community?

Vegetarian meals? Affordable private rooms? www.couch.coop

ROOMMATE WANTED 550 1 bedroom, near campus $300 per month 367-6626 AVAILABLE NOW AND FOR FALL Share beautiful furnished 3 bedroom apartment at Third and Clark. From $225. Ted 766-5108 Female Roommate Wanted 2 BR in Champaign, condo, airconditioning,cable,fireplace, washer/dryer, balcony/patio, furnished, telephone hook-up, garage, 2 bus routes. $425/mo. 217-721-5027 or 217-373-7978. rnhrdttl@uiuc.edu.

Fall 2005

Location

Bedrooms

102 E. Gregory, C 202 E. John, C 610 E. Stoughton, C 910 & 910.5 S. Locust, C 807 W. Oregon, U 810 W. Iowa, U 811 W. Oregon, U

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, & 6 1, 2, 3 2, 3, 4 1, 2 3 2 4

359-0700 • www.GabesPlace.com

Roommate wanted. 1 or 2. Male or Female. Nice house in country. $325 includes everything. 217-840-2257.

PARKING/STORAGE

570

Rent storage for the summer. Student special. Own your own storage. 384-5302

RealEstateforSale 600 CONDOS/DUPLEXES

Thou that placeth an ad upon this page will best thee rival ineth a duel.

620

3 bedroom 2.3 bath, lofted condo in Colony West. W/D. C/A, swimming pool, tennis courts, lots of parking. $895 637-0806

I N T R O | A R O U N D T O W N | L I S T E N , H E A R | M A I N E V E N T | A R T S & E N T E R TA I N M E N T | W I N E & D I N E | T H E S I LV E R S C R E E N | C L A S S I F I E D S

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Historic Lincoln Hotel 384-8800

Breakfast - Lunch - Dinner 128 Luxury rooms with a European touch. Indoor swimming pool & hot tub.

Alumni Tap: $1.50 Drafts Miller/Bud Light EVERY DAY

Come To The New Balance Store Š 2003 New Balance Shoe, Inc.

209 S. Broadway Urbaana IL

New Balance Urbana

Full Line of NB Shoes & Apparel N is for fit, not fashion. N is for technology, not gimmickry. N is for sticking to your principles. Real shoes engineered for real athletes. In multiple widths, not just multiple sizes. N is for New Balance. Find the perfect fit at New Balance Urbana.

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