Ritual Queen by Shokti
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hokti here, ritual mama of the Albion and EuroFaeries, Queer Spirit Festival organiser and facilitator of ecstatic full moon drum circles in London since mid 2000s, offering some history and practical tips from my 8th house Capricorn Moon... Ritual is deeply programmed into the subconscious patterns of humanity. Through ritual we can bring ourselves into alignment with the planetary energies. The movement of the earth round the sun and through the heavens creates a spiral dance—to which we can attune our hearts, minds and bodies. This is the way to wellness, wholeness and happiness. AIDS was my gateway to gatekeeping … the cocoon in which the witch/shaman/priest in me was birthed … in 2000 this butterfly emerged, looking for his tribe.... Accelerated: I came out aged twenty-one, in the final year of a history degree in the refined but peculiarly repressed atmosphere of Cambridge University in the UK. The genie finally out of the bottle, I rushed to bigger cities chasing joy, sex and love: entering the gay game in the mid 80s as ‘Don’t Die of Ignorance’ was broadcast on TV by the government, coming out into a gay scene tense with fear. Four years later I was diagnosed HIV+, then for five more years I was still well enough to continue feasting on life’s pleasures—the gay caterpillar, with no other ambition than to dance, to have great sex and to find love. It’s true what they say— the terminal diagnosis inspired me to live life to the full, I was out dancing every weekend, I did find deep passionate love. But aged thirty AIDS was kicking in, and everything changed. Individual: I had given up on god and religion in my early teens, and nothing had come along to make me think again until AIDS brought me an Accelerated Individual Discovery of Self. Fortunately, five years of taking LSD at weekends in fantastic underground 40 RFD 180 Winter 2019
gay clubs had, it turned out, prepared me well for this shock of the shakti awakening. I called out to God and SHE came to me—opening my mind and heart to the spiritual realms, old mental/emotional structures collapsed—I experienced an ecstatic rush of rebirth lasting months—suddenly my eternal soul was leading the way, and instead of being upset about dying I was more excited to be alive than I had ever been before. Discovery: Once I adjusted to the shock of the veils dissolving I dived into a study of philosophy, witchcraft, Taoism, Buddhism, mystical Christianity, Kabbalah etc; started to meditate and make up my own rituals. As my body faded my soul came alive, all fear of death vanished and during the painful journey of suffering that my body endured in the next three years I practised. Learning to open my heart to spirit I discovered the power of devotional spirituality, and studying the teachings of the worlds’ mystics from every race and faith I completely transformed my understanding of life. Of Self: Learning the mystical truths at the core of all faiths, I moved to a place of viewing life as one dance—which brought great ecstasies as I returned to the world post-AIDS but left me somewhat ‘empty’, unaware of my place within it. Spirit showed me then that our personalities and relationships are also part of the divine play. After five years in the transformational AIDS cocoon, in the year 2000 I stepped out into the world again, as a fragile, fresh butterfly. The shamanic witch in my soul was awake, but now had to face people (a task easily as daunting as death!) and it was time to find my soul’s friends and my tribe. I have been finding them ever since. First I met queer pagan witches in the south of England: many of them women working powerful nature and deity magic. I met gentle men at Edward Carpenter Community retreats, then among the Eurofaeries, at gatherings in the Netherlands and Germany I found my tribe of queer magicians, healers, teachers and artists. I came home. At Folleterre I became
