Over 40: A Sultry Reclamation Of Self

BOUDOIR BY RIA

OVER 40: A SULTRY RECLAMATION OF SELF

FIRST EDITION

ABOUT THIS PROJECT

THE OVER 40 CAMPAIGN IS DESIGNED TO BE A MILESTONE ON THE SELF LOVE JOURNEY ...A REMINDER THAT YOU CAN BE DRIPPING IN SENSUALITY AT ANY AGE..

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MIKA, 55

With all the chaos and uncertainty going on in the world it was difficult to feel like I was in charge of my life, and while there are some things I have no control over, there are plenty of things I can control. Like my thoughts of me and who I am! It doesn’t matter what others think of me but what I think of me! I love and celebrate me today.

I understand that where I am now in life is a direct reflection of the choices and decisions I’ve made. My purpose is to live life to the fullest by taking care of me and my overall happiness to the best of my abilities. This campaign has helped me reclaim control of me! This was about confidence & freedom--the ability to step outside my comfort zone and connect with my sensuality. There's nothing like feeling confident in your own skin!

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GINA, 60

I recently turned 60 and I wanted to do something really different to celebrate my love for my body. I have embraced growing MATURE, and I am excited about growing into my new self. I really haven’t had any pressures placed upon growing older, except for me accepting all of my dimples and stretch marks and just appreciating my body.

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KHALIAH, 43 As I move throughout my 40's and look back at life's ups and downs, I realize this is a season for me to fully embrace my power. I am finally internalizing the construct that beauty is not only skin deep...in fact the more I work on who I am at my core, the more beautiful I am in all of my being. I took the leap to participate in my boudoir shoot because I wanted to have tangible evidence of how far I have come in this journey called life and reflect upon my own timeless beauty.

I, as a doctor, single-mom, and survival of intimate partner violence , know that I am more beautiful now as a result of all of my trials and triumphs than I was 20 years ago. God is continually working on me and refining me...I am so grateful to have been fearfully and wonderfully made.

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With aging, I have felt pressure to subscribe to societal constructs of what defines a beautiful female form. It requires DAILY WORK to counter the external and internal dialogue that might suggest my petite bust or wrinkled brow need modifying or are somehow flawed. Taking the time to love on myself in all the big and small ways (from speaking over myself in the mirror in the morning, to buying lingerie that makes me feel amazing, to committing to a boudoir session) helps me to see myself clearly. I am a queen in my own right, just as I am.

NAHOSHA, 40 My recent journey has been like a blank canvas, empty and colorless. After suddenly losing my husband in Jan of 2021, grief knocked me down and then again in Feb 2022 suddenly losing my best friend. It was not until then that I realized every breath of life is SO precious. I've always been everything to everyone as a mom, wife, employee, sister, family support system and friend, but never making space for who I am. My outlook has shifted tremendously, and I've gained an appreciation for life. I've realized that life is too short for waiting. It's time to do what makes me happy and its necessary for me to live A LOT. I have been holding myself back from so many things, I am my own culprit standing in the way. Fear, doubt, and insecurities of my body had been holding me back from feeling comfortable enough to even think about boudoir photos. Who me? Life happened and forced me into therapy, which is where the discovery of myself began. A transition unexpected but necessary to find the person hiding within. I am now loving my body and the version of me....newly discovered. Although life has happened, there is no better time than stepping into my 40's to celebrate me. This moment is a celebration of life and all of the good things to come! I am worth the investment!

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RISA, 55

Being 55 and having never been married has been the biggest pressure of aging. The "old maid" stigma and the questions of "Why haven't you ever gotten married?" and "What is wrong with you?" get to you. I realized that I live this life for God and me. I want to do what makes me happy, and I want to love on me more. The boudoir session was an awesome jumpstart to that.

I did the shoot to celebrate my 55th birthday. I did it to embrace all of me- flaws and all. After many years of taking care of everyone else, I finally decided to celebrate me and love on me.

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CHRISTINA, 56

This was a very long journey of learning to love and accept myself just as I am right now. I’m not the thinnest or youngest I’ve ever been but I’m 100 times more confident in myself than ever before. Even when I was 100 pounds and a size 6, I struggled and felt insecure. I was burdened by worrying about what everyone else saw when they looked at me. Now, I’m old enough to know better and not give a damn what anyone else thinks.

I wanted to celebrate myself and show some love to the woman that it’s taken me 56 years to become. I love myself just like I am right now. Do I need to continue to learn and improve and grow? Yes, we all do or we become stagnant and boring but I intend to keep on loving the woman I’m evolving into through every step of the journey.

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DEYONNE, 50 I was really really nervous about doing this and I almost backed out of it several times. I had a moment to truly reflect on what I wanted in this next season of my life. It was my 50th birthday and I wanted to shed the weight of other people's opinions and toxic words over my life. I truly wanted to walk and live in my truth and do something COURAGEOUS! I think I put pressure on myself to accept my bodies curves, ripples, lines and stretch marks. I looked at them as imperfections and tried to cover them up. But I have a new take on them and I am choosing to embrace every part of my body and capturing it in its current state was the best thing I could have ever done.The photoshoot gave me a new found confidence in myself. I am truly embracing 50. The shoot blew me away and the pictures were AMAZING!!!! I can't tell you enough how incredible this experience was for me.

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SHAREESE, 42

I feel like this is a new start to a new chapter in my life where I’m pouring more love back into myself and this session made me see not only the outer beauty that I possess, but I’m more beautiful because my heart and light are shining through like never before.

As women we endure so much with our bodies. Having children, hormonal changes, etc. but we should definitely embrace our bodies and not allow outside forces to dictate our sexiness. Our sexiness should become more as we age instead of decline, but it has to definitely start from within-with our heart and true feelings we have for ourselves. I want other women to see that being 40 doesn’t mean you’re finished. You can start over at any point and be more successful, beautiful, feminine, and more powerful than ever before.

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SHAWN, 45 With the emergence and popularity of social media, there has been pressure to compare and compete. I’ve tried combatting this by spending less time on social media and maintaining a healthier lifestyle.

I had been following Ria Rouse on Instagram for a while and was always in awe of her clients’ transformations. I decided if “they” can do it …so can I! The testimonials of the previous years’ women prompted me to join the campaign. I wanted to have a testimony too! And here it is.

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TAMIEKA, 41

My body has changed so much during the pandemic.

Coupled with me turning 40, my body just isn’t the same.

I didn’t feel sexy anymore. I felt like I was losing the ability to love myself.

Because of how much weight I gained, I had a hard time imagining these pictures coming out looking beautiful.

BUT I didn’t let that stop me from committing fully during the photography session. Every time I look at my photos I feel my confidence grow. I stand differently.

Shoulders back. I’m no longer hiding from the public, no more avoiding the public eye.

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TIFFANY, 41 Pressures I have experienced as I have aged have included making an effort to appear younger than my actual age, particularly due to social media. I made the decision to finally commit to a boudoir session because of my survival testimony. My current weight and temporary ileostomy initially held me back from committing to the photo shoot. However, I decided to embrace and celebrate the body I currently have as it is because of this very body, I am still here and sustained me through 26 rounds of chemotherapy and radiation.

The experience was far more than what I expected in such a positive way. Surprisingly, I was far more comfortable, open and fearless during my session. The session further liberated and inspired me to love the skin I am in.

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VERONICA, 40

I lost myself as a mom and wife and basically neglected EVERYTHING if it pertained to caring for myself. (Other than brushing my teeth and showering of course LOL!) I felt like a prisoner in my own life--like things happened TO me instead of me showing up for myself and making things happen. I finally began letting go of that terrible mindset at the beginning of 2019.

I focused on making ME happy first and let everything else fall in place. And fall in place, it did. I got back in shape and dropped 50lbs. and my overall sense of wellbeing is way up. My goal is to celebrate no longer feeling like a ghost of the woman I USED to be and capture who I've grown into and the woman I'm becoming. Better, daily.

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CELI, 43 I had heard of boudoir, but I really didn’t know much about it. I really thought it was something risqué. When I first stumbled upon Ria’s Facebook page, I was immediately drawn in. The women in the photos were so stunning and beautiful! In every photo, the women glowed with self love and confidence and I was encouraged to book my session. I wanted to share my experience to help lift the spirits of others just as the women before had lifted me. I believe that we must encourage one another and straighten each other’s crown when one is not able to do so on her own. I am my sister’s keeper!

I was afraid that my photos wouldn’t be great if I didn’t lose weight. I thought I could only wear a one piece lingerie and not the bra and panty set. I did make some diet changes, but ultimately I had to change my thought process. I learned I had to love me and that made my photo shoot more special. I saw a lady I hadn’t seen for 10+ years. I took that moment and ran with it. I’m now buying high heels and wearing more than lip gloss. My session was great confidence booster!

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BRANDICE, 43 I never really look to be "the center of attention." But I've realized as I get older we must celebrate ALL the little things. I'm over 40, a pretty good functioning adult, retired military, successful in my eyes, etc. I don't know that I felt pressures in aging as far as being sexy. More so to be as healthy as I can. I've really accepted my body and life as it is. I am pretty happy with it.

I try to keep myself healthy and understand what an impact that makes as I get older. Don't get me wrong! I don't live a strict life/lifestyle but as I watch my parents age and I see the doctors' bills, medication, etc. and I know the statistics around black people and our health as we age, I try to not purposefully add to the statistics if I can help it. As far as being sexy...it is what it is. I'm confidently awkward. Lol. I have my days that nothing looks right, and my days that I'm KILLIN IT in workout clothes and a puff. I take each day as it comes.

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KRE, 40 I was on the verge of turning 40, and I wanted to do something not just for myself but also something that I typically would never do. Initially, fear held me back… insecurities held me back… I chose, however, to overcome those feelings and just do it!! The feelings did not go away, but I didn’t want the negative voice to overpower the positive one. I no longer want fear or doubt to stand in the way of opportunities that allow me to grow, become more confident, and create awesome memories. The opportunity to take some great pictures AND display them for others to enjoy (not hoard them for myself or hide myself) became the appeal for me.

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I don’t think age put pressure on me or was a hindrance on deciding to have a boudoir session… I’m actually coming into my own and my confidence as I am getting older. For me, it was the pressure of being a mother.

Mothers aren’t typically viewed as sexy… our bodies change after carrying babies. Additionally, we have the societal expectation to behave and carry ourselves in a certain way. I’m finding myself only being a mom these days- all the choices I make involve my kids, many of the activities in which I participate pertain to or involve the kids. I want to be a great mother, but I also want to be more than that!

CYLINDA, 56 I wanted to celebrate me so I decided that boudoir would be that celebration. I wanted to show that women like me who are over the age of 50 are beautiful and confident.

Although there are parts of my body that I do not like, I decided to show it anyway. I felt the pressure because I gained a lot of weight because of menopause. But I decided that other women needed to see that the weight doesn’t cancel out your sexiness. Sexiness is all in the mind and not the body. I loved every moment of my session. I felt beautiful and empowered. I learned to connect to my body.

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ALIDA, 53 Despite some of the ups and downs in my life I still feel there is so much more to do and experience. I remember being younger and meeting women in their 50's sorta settling into a sedentary life. I recall saying no that will not be me. There's more to do, see, and hear! Plus I do not feel like I am 50. I still ride my bike, skate, shoot some hoops, or play kickball. Those activities keep me young physically and mentally.

This campaign reminded me of all those good things and feelings because I was dealing with the remnants of caring for a child with health challenges and I was tired. I was motivated to take a chance and put myself first when I saw the campaign. My weight/size held me back at first.

Its something that I had been truly working hard to get down but I thought what if I never get down to the "ideal" size, then what? It was finally time to invest in me.

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JOSALYNE, 41 There were plenty of reasons that held me back. My weight, my age, my fear of someone seeing my body. Even my blemishes, acne, scars, stretch marks, old tattoos, if I’m being honest!! Not to mention money. I realized that all of those things make up the 41 years of me. The children I had stress acne as well acne from me neglecting my selfcare. The scars from my life stories. Tattoos from different phases of growth. The weight for various reasons but I carry it well nonetheless! Stretch marks, who cares!!! The money…. Honey, let’s be real. I deserve this. To be pampered, treated like a Queen, and feel like a star for a day. I have given up countless vacations, shopping trips, mental health days and nights, so I can absolutely spend this money on myself and not feel guilty.

There is a need for a positive embodiment of women and self-love. Not the desire to be “the new “, but just ”the you” is okay . We can be the old school and give the young girls something classy and respectful to look up to. Be beautiful, sexy, sassy, and love ourselves just how we are.

Embrace being in our femininity and set our own standards.

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TAMICA, 45 From a childhood of constant taunting about my looks from my big nose to big lips, I grew up to be a very insecure woman regarding how I look compared to other women. I was never really pretty in my eyes so I rarely wore lipstick for fear of drawing attention to my lips. Now I realize I was a beauty before this world recognize what beauty actually is and sadly I fell prey to the limited belief and definition of beauty. I was fearful that I would hate what my face would look like in photos or my facial expression would look weird. Now I also have this mom pudge since having my daughters that I can't seem to get rid of. Those thoughts that I wouldn't LOOK pretty or look too fat in the photos were my primary hang up. I had been wanting to do a shoot for years but kept wanting to wait until I had my weight under control before I would take the plunge.

The decision to do the session came from the thought that I wasn't getting any younger and didn't want to have any regrets of not doing it when I was younger i.e my 40s. I was 45 and what better way to commemorate my 45 years on the earth by celebrating me with all my accomplishments and beauty that I never appreciated as a teen or younger woman.

I definitely tried to come in with an open mind however my own personal insecurities immediately crept in. Going in I kept thinking I didn't meet my weight goal prior to the shoot and was worried how that would come across in the photos. I was in my head during certain parts of the shoot but once I saw those pics shiiiiiid you couldn't tell me nothing. I had forgotten how FIIIINE I was even with the little extra weight. I AM Beautiful and realized I am that girl. I decided that I can't let those insecurities take over my mind. I have two teenage daughters and I decided I wouldn't let my babies hear me say anything negative about my body anymore. I saw a different woman in those photos that I had never seen before EVER. She looks like a vixen, like the women I have seen so many times and questioned how they could be so confident. . She is fierce and sexy!! SHE is ME!!!

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SONDRA, 67 I’ve never done a photo shoot and thought it would be fun! One of my college sisters. had a session and I decided to take the plunge What held me back before was my age and weight loss/gain. The 40 over 40 campaign was a chance for me to get out of my inhibitions and celebrate me!

My mind is young but my body is not. It was hard to take the first step but in the session I felt comfortable. Ria made me feel beautiful!

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SHANNON, 53 I was on a weight loss journey and I have always been self conscious. So this was something I did for the new me.

Seeing all the beautiful women over the age of 40 from all walks of life inspired me to show up and be seen, since I usually always wanted to be invisible. On this self love journey I see I am beautiful and I want to be seen.

What I have learned is my beauty comes from within. Ria made me feel like a super model. She allowed me to be free and I felt like a different person. She inspired me to be the best person I could be. Now im always in front of a camera.

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