IN THE LENSES OF A BLACK CODA FEMALE INTERPRETER

Part two

Jason Hurdich, M.Ed.; CDI, RID Board of Directors Secretary (Past Region II Representative)

Amber Robinson, B.S. and NIC

Amber: Music from the Deaf side was loud, pounding percussion. You could feel the beat, but it wasn’t quite as pronounced on the hearing side. So the differences were there. Also, the experiences were different in the church. In the Deaf world, there were many churches with deaf services. On the hearing side, we had to use interpreters, or I became the interpreter.

Jason: That’s interesting. Wow, growing up, you were immersed in the Deaf world, the Deaf culture and all of the things there, but in the Black culture, Black identity seems that may not have been overly thought of as much as, compared to the primacy of Deaf identity; it seems that the Black identity formation came later.

Amber: Yes, not so much that my Black identity was later - but because in the Deaf world, I felt “normal.’’ It wasn’t until I arrived in Troy that I noticed a difference, which was startling. At home in a Deaf Black house, we don’t sign that way. We don’t do that. I never knew that kind of thing happened. The signs I saw were very different from home. At home, we used Black ASL compared to Troy’s school signs. But with hearing families and friends there at the college - I noticed and identified and learned to identify who I am, and I learned to like these things and what I didn’t like - that was my experience.

Jason: That’s interesting! Now when you talk about your Troy experience, as you mentioned, that is southern Alabama, right?

Amber: Yes, in very much south Alabama.

Jason: Troy University has the only ITP in Alabama. As you recall, I worked with you in Troy. It is a town of 19,000 students, a small town south of Montgomery, the capital of Alabama. You shared during your presentation at the ALRID conference that you felt like the ITP class was white; you were the only Black student. All of your teachers were white. You felt like ITP was 100 percent white-run, as you shared. Would you mind elaborating on those points as you reflected upon that, how did that impact you, can you give an example of what we might have overlooked in our own privilege, and can you share your experience with that?

Amber: Troy - I was the only Black student in the ITP of white students. We had the largest graduating class in the Troy ITP history at the time, I think around maybe 23 or so students. I was the sole Black student. There was another Black interpreter who was studying online with a different curriculum; however, our experience was on campus. As the sole Black student in the whole class in a white space then, I was the sole visibly different interpreter. I saw a lot of things that I had never noticed before, like microaggressions.

“I was the only Black student in the ITP of white students.”

Amber: Such as clothing - that is very important in Troy - you must be professional and have colorcontrasting clothing, so your hands are visible. But their key difference they recommended dark colors repeatedly. I am a dark woman! So I had to speak up and ask, “what colors should I wear?” What could I wear? Because my experience is different from the white experience because they know that as a legacy of training for white interpreters. They suggested I could wear pastel colors, which left me feeling off. Whiteness was not considered in the suggestions I was given. But it was hard to figure out what I could wear to look good with dark skin. But not many people realized that these factors were impacting me because of colorism.

Which means that darker-skinned women - really, we stand out. We are always criticized, especially people in the Black community. Especially in the media, which you will see in books a lot of the time. For example, the author Alice Walker writes about colorism. That was really impactful because I was hurt. Now I struggled with darker-skinned women being looked down upon. I struggled, and when I finally started feeling good about myself, the ITP corrected me and criticized me. They criticized my clothing choices and my skin, but they were unaware. They were unaware of the impact because they had never experienced that. But a lot of Black darkskinned girls experience that. So, for example, my sign right now

Jason: I remember you mentioned that during your presentation. had to remember to pull back into the sign box. But that is how white interpreters sign, nice, small, and restricted; light signing, using the signing space chin to belly, and within my shoulder width. As I grew up, I felt we just signed like Black people, and Black people speak the same way, and Black deaf people have their signing, but they called it English, not ASL.

I was signing as a child, and they would say, you’re signing in English. No, I was not signing in English. I signed that way because Black people signed that way. Black ASL was the key difference. Just like hearing people do, we have Black sign language and slang. Black people use AAVE, African American Vernacular English. So you have to understand that I was a Black interpreter looking for more than what I could find in my ITP.

“They criticized my clothing choices and my skin, but they were unaware. They were unaware of the impact because they had never experienced that.”

“My sign space is not small. My signing space is wide and large because Black people sign like that. But I was corrected for that.”

Amber: My sign space is not small. My signing space is wide and large because Black people sign like that. But I was corrected for that. I was told no, that my signing space must become smaller, and that we have jobs on camera where you need to sign; I had a hard time really being able to interpret because I Jason: You felt like the spotlight was being shone on you, and you were being criticized even by your Deaf teachers for your signing style, right?

Amber: Right. My Deaf teachers didn’t realize there were Black ITP students who also wanted to become interpreters. They took ASL 1 and ASL 2, and then they stopped.

“You can be straightforward and honest, you absolutely can, you understand. But the different cultures, the difference is there.”

Jason: Interesting.

Amber: Then I realized as I was asking them, “Did you feel okay?” It was not because the language was so hard. They were criticized because of their signing style, or they would take ASL 1, ASL 2, ASL 3, and ASL 4 and would be doing well. Then, once they got into the ITP, they were criticized for signing too much English and were told, “your hands are signing incorrectly.” They felt they needed to leave and find something else, and they felt so defeated. So you have to understand that the criticisms, yes, you can be straightforward and honest, you absolutely can, you understand. But the different cultures, the difference is there. And that really there was a loss in the ITPs, really the culture of the ITPs was geared towards understanding the Deaf, but not understanding other cultures that were coming into the program; the lack of representation was real. But also, the class was solely taught with understanding the Deaf culture as well; that was the primary perspective. Yeah, I understand. But there was no Black Deaf representation.

Jason: You mentioned Black students were taking ASL 1 and ASL 2, and still teachers were criticizing their ASL, calling their signing English, saying they were not fitting in, but criticizing them from a white ASL perspective, which forced the student population to shrink. It wasn’t about ASL 1, 2, 3, or 4. It was that we lost a potential interpreter, right? We lost them.

Amber: Yes, because really, ignoring their Black identity, and that’s not all. It was not about not understanding deaf culture. We would then come into the ITP being excited to learn ASL and then being criticized. Why should you stay? Why would you want to stay with that? You can accept that I can sign, just not the way you want.

Jason: I understand. You continued with the program knowing that mindset was present in the ITP, and you continued in doing that. What pushed you to continue, even not knowing about Black ASL until later? How did you move through the program and decide to stay?

“I moved through the program because I am a CODA. It helped me understand this world that you will have to live in.”

Amber: I moved through the program because I am a CODA. It helped me understand this world that you will have to live in. You have to understand the criticism and use that to foster your own push for success. Also, that straightforward blunt attitude that’s just part of the Deaf culture as well. I had to accept that this was something that I understand, okay, I made mistakes, but I’m still myself. The other thing is that I was involved with many other activities and organizations that helped me understand that as a Black woman in a privileged white world, I have to navigate things for myself. And understand that later it will be successful, it will be fine, I will succeed. And lastly, really, my family set me up for success.

“Why would I not have a Black name that is pretty like my sister’s? I wanted her name; it was creative. But I realize that it helped me.”

Jason: Can you give me an example of your family setting you up for success? Amber: In my presentation, I explained my own name; my full name is Amber Marie Robinson. My sister’s name is Camisha Ann Robinson. I noticed the difference on paper; you look at my name, and it looks white. Compared with my sister, her name you can identify that it is Black. I thought to myself, why would I not have a Black name that is pretty like my sister’s? I wanted her name; it was creative. But I realize that it helped me. My job experience in Alabama, seeing a white name, you will be accepted for jobs. That happens in the Black community if you have a whitesounding name, but you’re really not white - you’re Black.

Jason: Did you see the dichotomy for your sister?

Amber: In college, I had four roommates. Of the four of us, three were white. I was the only Black woman there. So I walked in and was cleaning up my space. I heard the door and saw my roommate awkwardly saying hi to me. It was very different. I Introduced myself, “Hi, my name is Amber.” She asked me, “Are you sure?” I said, “Yes. Yes, I’m Amber.” She said, “I thought you would be white because I saw your name on the form when we were getting ready to move in. I thought you were a white girl. Wow.” I was like, “Yeah. That’s me.” It was awkward.

Jason: Yeah, I can imagine it was awkward.

“If they see a Black person in sloppy clothing, we are judged for that. It would not be remarked upon if a white person was viewed in sloppy clothes.”

Amber: So, it happens. Also, just to add, clothing: my parents always taught me when going out in public or going places, people around will judge your clothing, that is representative of who you are, so I always want to look my best when I go out when I’m going into a room. For example, in Troy, I always walked into the classroom dressed FINE. The clothing was good. If it was gym class, I always wore something really nice because when people look at you entering the room, if they see a Black person in sloppy clothing, we are judged for that. It would not be remarked upon if a white person was viewed in sloppy clothes.

Jason: I remember your dad, Patrick. He tended to always wear a suit and tie. You mentioned that during your presentation as well. I remember you shared that practice was reinforced at home. Would you mind elaborating on that teaching from your dad and why that was significant?

Amber: Growing up, my family had a practice. It was like a pyramid. At the top is the white man, then the middle, white women. Then at the next level, the Black man. Then at the bottom, Black women. On the bottom level. This means that you have to be the best when you enter a room. You can’t be less than. You can’t be seen as weak because people will judge and perceive you that way in your profession. Typically, going into a Black world, you have to be the best. At all times, the clothing and hair fit and match because that is what people expect in the South. Black people really are looked down upon.

“You can’t be seen as weak because people will judge and perceive you that way in your profession.”

room where white people are, you have to be on your best behavior. You can have a movement when you can be a Black person and relax, but you have to code switch. Black people use that a lot. My dad taught me that you have to sign differently when you go into a room. You want white people to understand and be comfortable and think, I can read your signs and understand what you are saying. However, if I go to a Black professional setting, it’s the same way. You have to sign clearly, but a little more expressively. My hands right now, my sign window grows and changes depending on the space that I am in. My comfort level changes depending on my audience.

There are all those stereotypes and labels. No. I want to know that when I come in, I mean business. And my attitude and personality will become how I decide whether I am comfortable in a room. Going into a

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