Riverfront Times, August 25, 2021 by Riverfront Times

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MARCH 6-12, 2019

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THE LEDE

“There’s this one quote that one of my friends said that ‘America’s 9/11 is our every day, every single day.’ That’s what happens in our country, where people get killed and kidnapped or, you know, just lose a loved one. And we’re just here [today] to be heard. And hopefully America does something about it.”

PHOTO BY THEO WELLING

FATEMA KHWAJA (RIGHT) WITH HER SISTER MARIAM KHWAJA AT THE SAVE AFGHANISTAN, OUR FLAG OUR IDENTITY RALLY OUTSIDE CITY HALL ON SUNDAY, AUGUST 22 riverfronttimes.com

AUGUST 25-31, 2021

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A Little Inspiration

o be honest, we weren’t sure we would do a Fall Arts Guide this year because of, you know, everything. But then we started looking around and found more really amazing things happening than we could fit in the paper. And, yes, sadly some of this will probably get canceled as the pandemic continues (we had to edit out a few items as we went to press), but seeing the range and quality of projects has me feeling optimistic. The artist responsible for that cover, Alicia Lachance, is just one noteworthy example. A cofounder of the Hoffman LaChance Contemporary gallery (2713 Sutton Ave., Maplewood; 314-398-9636) she is in the midst of a huge year, including in-the-works commissions for Tampa Bay Buccaneers and Manchester United co-owner Bryan Glazer and a separate project with soccer star David Beckham and his design team in Singapore. And that’s just part of what she has going on. After you’re done drinking in her art on the cover, flip back to our guide to what to see this fall, and I know you’re going to feel optimistic, too. —Doyle Murphy, editor in chief

TABLE OF CONTENTS Publisher Chris Keating Editor in Chief Doyle Murphy

E D I T O R I A L Digital Editor Jaime Lees Interim Managing Editor Daniel Hill Staff Writer Danny Wicentowski Contributors Cheryl Baehr, Eric Berger, Jeannette Cooperman, Mike Fitzgerald, Ryan Krull, Andy Paulissen, Justin Poole, Theo Welling, Ymani Wince Columnists Thomas Chimchards, Ray Hartmann Editorial Interns Zoë Butler, Holden Hindes, Erin McAfee, Jack Probst, Victor Stefanescu A R T

& P R O D U C T I O N Art Director Evan Sult Production Manager Haimanti Germain M U L T I M E D I A A D V E R T I S I N G Associate Publisher Colin Bell Account Managers Emily Fear, Jennifer Samuel Multimedia Account Executive Chuck Healy Director of Public Relations Brittany Forrest

COVER

C I R C U L A T I O N Circulation Manager Kevin G. Powers

Fall Arts Guide

E U C L I D M E D I A G R O U P Chief Executive Officer Andrew Zelman Chief Operating Officers Chris Keating, Michael Wagner VP of Digital Services Stacy Volhein www.euclidmediagroup.com

Cover excerpted from art by

ALICIA LACHANCE

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HARTMANN The New Boss Greater St. Louis Inc.’s mission includes Old Guard backers — and priorities BY RAY HARTMANN

or a brief shining moment, transformation hung in the air. The St. Louis business elite had stunned the community last October with news that almighty Civic Progress was no more. Once sacrosanct, the league of the area’s largest companies was now but one of five civic groups folded into one shiny new thing. Greater St. Louis Inc. would change everything. In the unveiling, Andy Taylor, executive chairman of Enterprise Holdings, spoke strange new words: “We’ve got to up our game here. It’s very apparent that some of these other cities [in the Midwest] are ahead of us.” Billionaire humility peviously had not been a thing in St. Louis. So folks soaked up these words delivered by Taylor, the town’s most esteemed mogul by a mile: “Doing this gives us one voice, gives us more focus. It will force us to make an agenda of things we need to get done. We’re off to a very good start. There’s not been one person, one entity that’s said this is a bad idea. It’s like everyone had this collective epiphany.” At last, one large, overriding group — an honest broker, above the fray — with the vision to lead the St. Louis region as a fifteencounty juggernaut with a new sense of unity. Diversity would replace uniformity. Transparency would replace secrecy. Collaboration would replace tribalism. “Perhaps St. Louis can develop the needed attitude to become more like a growing Atlanta than a shrinking St. Louis,” said one gullible fool in the media. But enough about me. Despite the high hopes, a funny thing happened on the way to paradise: Greater St. Louis Inc. didn’t turn out to be such an honest broker after all. Its intentions might remain pure enough, but it functions pretty

much of, by and for the same Old Guard it ostensibly supplanted. To be sure, Jason Hall, the group’s dynamic young CEO, has brought energy and fine messaging for the business community on topics ranging from Medicaid expansion to vaccines to Afghan refugees. But to that essential mission of pulling together St. Louis with one voice? Not so much. There was a key design flaw. Rather than amalgamating five civic organizations, Greater St. Louis Inc. brought together four nonprofits and one very underestimated for-profit component: Arch to Park. Hall had founded Arch to Park in 2018 as a not-for-profit LLC supported by a for-profit real estate investment fund featuring some of St. Louis’ most powerful people and institutions. Technically, this wasn’t a secret, but it flew so far under the radar that hardly anyone noticed. Arch to Park was the square peg in the round hole. The four nonprofits — Civic Progress, Downtown STL Inc., St. Louis Regional Chamber and AllianceSTL — were blended into another nonprofit. But Arch to Park, its name sounding like some environmental group, was green in a different sort of way. Arch to Park was the key to forming Greater St. Louis. It was aptly described in the St. Louis Business Journal as “the group driving St. Louis’ civic mega-merger.” Hall assumed the same top-executive role he had at Arch to Park and brought along most of his talented team to run it. Arch to Park did all manner of good work, and much of that will be carried on by Greater St. Louis Inc. But its real-estate fund was strictly defined as a city-only enterprise. That isn’t consistent with the regional mission of the mother ship. Neither is this: Greater St. Louis Inc. continues to maintain a troubling relationship with the private, for-profit and powerful real-estate fund now known as the Arch to Park Equity Fund, LLC. The regional not-for-profit manages the localized for-profit investment fund. To borrow Taylor’s term, there’s your epiphany. It is both absurd and inappropriate for the “honest broker” to have any special mission in one

of those fifteen counties it shepherds. Yet that’s exactly the state of play today with Greater St. Louis’ seeming obsession with real estate deals in the urban core. What is the message to those not in the urban core? By its very smart definition, Greater St. Louis Inc. must project and maintain its neutrality, in reality and in appearance. But that’s not happening here. Why no cries of outrage? That one’s easy: It turns out this isn’t just any old fund. The Arch to Park Equity Fund LLC has some familiar, truly esteemed faces, rendering the transformation not so transformational. If I might channel lyrics from The Who, “Meet the new boss. Same as the old boss.” As best we know, the investors of Arch to Park are as follows: Taylor; Ameren Corporation; BJC HealthCare; Washington University; Saint Louis University; St. Louis Cardinals; Commerce Bancshares Foundation; Schnuck Markets Inc.; Susan B. McCollum of Major Brands; and the Paula and Rodger Riney Foundation. Never underestimate the Old Guard. Mandatory St. Louis disclaimer: Yes, these are wonderful people and institutions who have done — and continue to do — wonderful things for St. Louis. And no, we should never stop appreciating their contributions. But when it comes to protecting their business interests, they are all business. They need not be worshipped as untouchable. And no, they’re not petulantly going to take their largesse and go elsewhere just because someone dares say a critical thing. Tony Wyche, spokesman for Greater St. Louis Inc. — and by default, the fund — said its investments are legally limited to the border of the city. He declines to describe the inner workings or ownership shares of the investors. Wyche did push back strongly against the notion that Taylor or anyone else has a controlling interest, despite multiple sources telling me he has contributed a significant portion of the $190 million it has reportedly raised. But the fact that the details are none of the public’s business rather says it all. Hall told me that Greater St.

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Louis Inc. merely gets reimbursed at cost for the time and work of three full-time real estate professionals and, yes, when he’s involved in deals, Hall himself. Wyche stressed that Greater St. Louis does not own the fund and thus does not make a dime off it. Talk about a distinction without a difference. Yes, let’s be clear: This is NOT a real estate side hustle. It just looks and feels like one, and appearances matter. I’m not buying what they’re selling. If this is such a civic-minded sacrifice, why wasn’t the Arch to Park Equity Fund LLC set up as a nonprofit? And why can’t it take some of that $190 million and hire its own management team? I am told I just don’t get it, that this is all benign. These companies are providing “patient capital,” supporting real estate efforts of strategic importance to the community that might not be feasible through the normal workings of the market. And they’re doing it civically, for a return on investment well below market rates. I don’t question the sincerity with which that message is delivered. But I don’t believe the message. For Greater St. Louis Inc. to have anything to do with this private investment fund is unacceptable. It blows up any happy talk about regionalism and transparency. Major chambers of commerce should be in the business of promoting and advocating business, not doing it — or managing it — themselves. That’s transactional, not transformative. Rather than providing a strong and unified voice for the region with developing the urban core as one of its priorities, Greater St. Louis Inc. has positioned itself as a strong developer of the urban core with regionalism as one of its priorities. They’ve got it backwards. Which, not coincidentally, is the direction St. Louis continues to head. n Ray Hartmann founded the Riverfront Times in 1977. Contact him at rhar tmann1952@gmail.com or catch him on Donnybrook at 7 p.m. on Thursdays on Nine PBS and St. Louis In the Know with Ray Hartmann from 9 to 11 p.m. Monday thru Friday on KTRS (550 AM).

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NEWS St. Louis Welcomes Afghans, Hopes for More Written by

DOYLE MURHY

s Afghans flee a Taliban takeover at home, St. Louis o cials hope they’ll land here. e’re ready to welcome Afghan citizens to the ateway City with open arms and open hearts, St. Louis ayor Tishaura ones says. ones spoke last week at a news conference at the nternational nstitute of St. Louis alongside speakers representing the county government, regional business community, military veterans and immigrants who’ve found a home in the region. Local leaders have pushed hard to position the city as a destination for at least 1,000 of the tens of thousands of people leaving and trying to leave Afghanistan. ones and St. Louis County ecutive Sam Page released a oint statement on August 18 in support of accepting the newcomers. St. Louis is one of nineteen cities across the nited States in the running to accept a portion of the influ of Afghans. ost of the focus has been on Afghans who have Special mmigrant isas. S holders worked with American troops in support of the .S. mission, often serving as interpreters, in clerical roles and even fighting alongside American soldiers. n twenty years of war, that support network swelled, and there are believed to be nearly 21,000 S holders. The number multiplies when their families are included, with estimates of 0,000 to 80,000 hoping to escape the wrath of Taliban forces. Arrey benson, president of the nternational nstitute, says the process of resettling the new wave

International Institute President Arrey Obenson says resettlement has begun. | DOYLE MURPHY of Afghans is already underway. t’s not when, he says. e’re already having arrivals. About 0 have come this year, according to benson, but they are not the first. Since 2010, the nternational nstitute has resettled 2 Afghan citizens. About half have been S holders. Pete Lucier, a St. Louis native who served as a arine in Afghanistan and is now a Saint Louis niversity law student, spoke last week of working alongside Afghan interpreters, whom he described as essential to .S. efforts. America owes these people a debt for what they did for me, for my brothers and sisters who served in Afghanistan, he says. eterans, specifically, owe those who are coming here a debt for everything that they did for us. They patrolled alongside us. They sweated with us. hen it came to it, they would grab weapons and shoot back at the enemy with us. And sometimes, they died with us. ach fiscal year, the federal government determines the number of refugees and S holders who will be allowed into the country. As the RFT previously reported in a ovember 2019 cover story, the Trump administration’s anti-immigrant and anti-refugee policies largely choked off the pipeline and dismantled much of the infrastructure used to move people

through the time-consuming process of background checks and paperwork. But the numbers are still e pected to increase in the coming year, and the nternational nstitute hopes for large numbers of Afghans. Blake amilton, vice president of programs for the nternational nstitute, tells the RFT in a phone interview that the pace of resettlement has uickened with the crisis in Afghanistan. n normal times, their team would have seven to ten days’ notice of arrivals, time which they used to find housing and set up other supports. ow, the notice is about 2 hours. This is not normal, not normal circumstances, he says. To fill the need, they’ve worked with partner organizations and local government. ones says the city is following the nternational nstitute’s lead as to what support is needed. She noted that President Biden’s administration has earmarked $ 00 million to help cities resettle S holders and says her administration is looking at whether that could help in St. Louis. or St. Louis leaders, part of the work has been in framing the message to residents. At last week’s news conference, speakers made a point of highlighting the benefits to the region of welcoming S holders, who tend to be

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educated professionals, including lawyers, accountants and clerical workers who were needed to support the .S. efforts. And St. Louis leaders have drawn on the e ample of Bosnian refugees who flocked to the city in the 1990s. The story of the Bosnians, who helped reshape struggling south-city neighborhoods by starting businesses and redeveloping dilapidated housing, is now seen as a huge success for St. Louis. The nternational nstitute and Catholic Charities directly resettled about 11,000 Bosnians fleeing slaughter in their country, and that number multiplied five to seven times, depending on the estimate. But as warmly as St. Louis now remembers the arrival of Bosnians, there wasn’t immediate acceptance. n the early years, neighborhood groups complained about the newcomers, launching missives about outdoor smokers and speeding Bosnian teens. St. Louis leaders seem to be working to head off similar resistance to Afghans, emphasizing the statistically high tendency of foreignborn residents to start new businesses and the need to attract new people in a city where the population continues to decline. After decades of loss, want our city to grow, ones says, and that means laying out the welcome mat for those who want to build a better life for themselves and their families here. ne of last week’s speakers, an Afghan man who arrived in the .S. in 201 through an S , says he’s found St. Louis to be a welcoming place. e ran a small market here that eventually went under during the pandemic and now works in T for the nternational nstitute. e says he was shocked by the speed of the Taliban’s takeover, and he worries about family left behind. e asked that the RFT not publish his name, because he’s concerned relatives will face retribution. The man refers to the forces now in control of his native country as the dark regime and says the Taliban’s recent attempts to present a more civil face to the world is a front that will dissipate in the coming weeks. verall, the dark regime has not changed, he says. t has become more brutal. n

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RIVERFRONT TIMES

Judge Issues Preliminary Injunction in County Mask Battle Written by

JENNA JONES

judge ruled last week to continue a preliminary injunction against the St. Louis County mask mandate. The ruling comes after two brief extensions on the first preliminary injunction. The extensions were granted in order for St. Louis County Executive Sam Page and Attorney General Eric Schmitt’s legal teams to reach an agreement about the mandate outside of court. Despite both teams acknowledging “an increase in COVID-19 cases is cause for concern,” the two parties were unable to reach a consensus on their own, court documents read. Thus, Judge Nellie Ribaudo ruled to continue the preliminary injunction, citing a lack of enforcement in the mandate from the county among the court’s decision. The ruling once again blocks the mandate from being enforced. But the court will still consider the whole case. A permanent injunction is required in order to stop the mask mandate from being enforced. “The people prevailed yet again against County Executive Page and his health department for attempting to impose their

Missouri Rep’s Husband Dies of COVID-19 Written by

DOYLE MURPHY

teve Walsh, press secretary for U.S. Congresswoman Vicky Hartzler, has died after catching COVID-19, according to his wife, state Representative Sara Walsh. She delivered the news last week on Twitter. “It saddens my heart to share that this morning my best friend and beloved husband Steve Walsh was welcomed to Heaven’s glory into the arms of Jesus Christ his Lord and Savior,” the Ashlandbased Republican wrote. The couple both contracted COVID-19, and Sara Walsh told KCRG in early August that she and her husband had chosen not to receive the vaccine because it had not been approved by the Food and Drug Administration. She also said she knew people who’d had bad reactions to it. The vaccines have received emergency-use authorization, and the FDA and

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County Executive Sam Page is still urging everyone to wear masks. | SCREENSHOT will illegally on the people of St. Louis County,” Schmitt said in a news release. “I will not stop in my fight against government overreach.” Schmitt’s statement echoes one issued on August 3, declaring a “huge win” for the people of St. Louis County. Yet, Ribaudo’s ruling criticized Schmitt for claiming victory in this case. Reiterating the August 3 decision, today’s ruling countered Schmitt’s claims saying “the court’s clear and unambiguous statement that the only victory is when the citizens of this State and County are no longer at risk of illness and death at the

health experts have urged everyone who is eligible to get the shot while the long approval process continues. Nearly 200 million Americans have received at least one dose. The FDA announced on August 18 that it was prepared to begin offering booster shots to the fully vaccinated, starting September 20. Missouri remains one of the hardesthit states in the country as the delta variant surges. Health officials continue to try to persuade reluctant residents to get the vaccine, noting that nearly all of those who are dying or forced to be hospitalized are unvaccinated. Even so, it’s been a hard sell here. On August 2, the day before Sara Walsh first announced her husband was on a ventilator with COVID-19, six Republican legislators called on Governor Mike Parson to convene a special session of the General Assembly in hopes of blocking businesses from mandating vaccines for employees. Following Walsh’s announcement of her husband’s death, messages of condolences poured in on Twitter from politicians as well as journalists who knew Steve Walsh from his time as a journalist and through his job as Hartzler’s communications director. “I’m so sorry to hear this devastating news,” wrote Missouri House Speaker

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hands of the COVID-19 virus.” “In a time where our hospitals are near or at capacity in their ICU’s from COVID-19 patients, where surgical procedures are once again being put off due to the strain on our hospitals from COVID-19 patients,” Ribaudo added in her ruling, “and people are being infected at rates significantly higher than many other areas of our Country how can one claim victory.” Page took to Twitter after the ruling, saying he was confident the people of St. Louis County would continue wearing masks to protect themselves and the

community. He also emphasized that public health experts say masks save lives. On the same day of Ribaudo’s decision, St. Louis County Council Chairwoman Rita Heard Days and three other members — Councilwoman Shalonda Webb of the 4th district, Councilman Tim Fitch of the 3rd district and Mark Harder of the 7th district — sent a letter to the judge. It said the council members were hoping to provide additional perspective and information. Council members cited frustrations with Page and his “unilateral rule.” “What is clear to the council is that the County Executive has no intention of ever voluntarily coming to the council or working with the council on public health orders, as required by state law,” the letter read. Also in the letter were accusations against fellow council members and the county executive, charging them with only fighting over masks for electoral benefits. Days’ letter also says two other members — not named in the letter but a reference to Councilwoman Lisa Clancy of the 5th district and Councilwoman Kelli Dunaway of the 2nd district — and Page battle the council over mask mandates “for theater.” The members also said if the county executive would “simply follow the law,” the council would pass a health order that the ruling mentioned. The ruling finished with a note from the court: “It remains the court’s hope that our citizens will respect one another and where appropriate wear face coverings to protect themselves and others from the highly contagious COVID-19 virus.” n

Representative Sara Walsh and her husband Steve Walsh. | SARA WALSH/TWITTER Rob Vescovo. Prayers for you and your wonderful husband Steve. May true arms be around in your time of need.” Missouri Lieutenant Governor Mike Kehoe wrote, “Steve Walsh was a true professional, an incredibly kind man of strong faith, and he was our friend.” Parson interrupted his appearance

at the Governor’s Ham Breakfast at the Missouri State Fair to inform a crowd of hundreds of attendees of Steve Walsh’s death from COVID-19. Parson asked for a moment of silence. “I would ask all of you to put your thoughts and prayers with Sara and her family,” he said. n

THE BIG MAD ANTI-PROGRESS Deworming COVID, Kolten’s curse and St. Louis County’s slap fight Compiled by

RFT STAFF

elcome back to the Big Mad, the RFT’s weekly roundup of righteous rage! Because we know your time is short and your anger is hot: HORSE DOCTORS: If the good people of Lake Ozark are determined to have a complete dipshit as their mayor, could they just stick with one? There was the old mayor, Gerry Murawski, who admitted on tape to local news site LakeExpo that he paid for a prostitute but insisted he didn’t know she was sixteen. And now his replacement, Dennis Newberry, is on record, via his own public (now removed or set private) Facebook post, saying he has “procured” some ivermectin for a longtime friend who he says is deathly ill with COVID-19. (Sidenote: He put quotes around ivermectin, which also worries us a bit.) Newberry mentions that his friend is in the hospital, but the mayor is asking for prayers in hopes that trained healthcare workers will stand aside and allow his friend to be dosed by amateurs with a drug commonly used to treat parasites in horses. If you are not typically in the horse-deworming business and are just hearing about ivermectin, the FDA has made a point of saying it does not approve it as a COVID-19 treatment. “You are not a horse. You are not a cow. Seriously, y’all. Stop it,” the agency tweeted over the weekend in a plea to those planning to dabble in a little ivermectin self medication. Really, the main problem isn’t one (or two) clown mayors; it’s that politicians far above them and merciless grifters have been so effective in undercutting the advice of experts that frighteningly large swaths of the population are scared of a vaccine that millions have safely taken, but will raid veterinarians’ supplies in desperation. The Newberrys of the world aren’t the genesis, just the manifestation, played out to tragically absurd ends. The Curse of Kolten: Hey, John Mozeliak, remember Kolten Wong? He’s a two-time Gold Glove winner who can hit, run fast and jump high. Even better, he’s an actual delight of a player, who Cards fans adored — someone who genuinely seems to love to play baseball and doesn’t need to pretend that wearing a

“You are not a horse. You are not a cow. Seriously, y’all. Stop it,” the FDA tweeted over the weekend. bowtie or a plaid blazer every once in a while is a personality. Anyway, we were thinking about him recently because he returned to St. Louis (where he would have stayed if someone hadn’t cheaped out on picking up the very reasonable option on his contract) with the Brewers and reminded us that he’s fun to watch and baseball should be fun. Did you catch the moment when he stole second on Yadi and Yadi enjoyed it because everyone likes Kolten that much? Seems like a good guy to have in the clubhouse. THE FOREVER SLAP FIGHT: It’s hard to remember who was supposed to learn what lesson in the ongoing fight between St. Louis County Council members and County Executive Sam Page. After a couple weeks of meetings, letters, snide tweets, radio talk-show interviews and the county’s entry into the increasingly crowded “We’ve been sued by shameless culture warrior Eric Schmitt” club, the county has accomplished approximately nothing. Honestly, it probably lost a few steps. It has managed to unite anti-vaxxers, who have taken to comparing proposed requirements to wear masks at the grocery store to the atrocities of the Holocaust. So good job encouraging that element while arguing points of order. Meanwhile, the delta variant rolls on through another deadly summer toward another fatal fall. Hospitals are filling and more kids are getting seriously sick. At least the county’s elected officials will have shown other county officials … something. AIR FRYER: Outside sucks right now. A week of temperatures in the 80s ruined us for this week of approximately 1,000 degrees. Why do you do this to us, Missouri? What are we supposed to do with roasting heat and 90-plus percent humidity? Last week, we were drinking beers on patios. This week, we’re peeling our bare legs off of vinyl seat covers. It’s miserable. But, hey, you could always go cool off at the Lake of the Ozarks where you can count on good friends to bring you horse dewormer if you catch COVID and become mortally sick. n

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Nation t o p g n i t l e m a , s d o o F At Louisa l a i t n e s s e t n i u q e h t s e c u d o r p s r e of work h s i d s i u o L St.

BY VICTOR STEFANESCU

ugust 8, 1994, was a big day for Denis Krdzalic — he still remembers the date. That’s the day for him: the day he came to America.

Krdzalic is from Bosnia, like many who now call St. Louis home. He was studying at the University of Zagreb in Croatia as a war that killed an estimated 100,000 people ripped through his country. Declared an alien of Bosnia, Krdzalic, 23 at the time, was referred to American refugee services and moved to St. Louis. He couldn’t even find the city on a map. “And I’m really good at geography,” Krdzalic says. Knowing nothing about the city, Krdzalic found a forklift gig in shipping and receiving at Louisa Foods about 40 days after he arrived. The pasta company was a fairly small operation back then. Krdzalic says about 60 workers operated a factory floor now run by a diverse workforce of roughly 250 immigrants and St. Louis natives. They push out one of the city’s most recognizable dishes to far reaches of the country. The toasted ravioli you are probably thinking about right now

most likely came from Louisa. Whether it’s the Super Bowl party t-ravs grabbed hot out of the oven at kickoff or the sober-you-up fried pasta you got at the bar last week, it all starts at the 1918 Switzer Avenue factory in Jennings. Louisa Foods didn’t invent travs — the company’s management wants that to be clear — but they make the most iconic ones, even with the rise of national competitors. “We’ve never tried to be the biggest … that has never been our goal, to be the biggest,” says Tom Baldetti, the third-generation owner of the company. “We’ve tried to make it as good as we can.” Fernando Baldetti, an Italian immigrant and Tom’s grandfather, started Louisa by hand-making traditional ravioli in the basement of Garavelli’s. The cafeteria-like Midtown restaurant, where he was a partner, shuttered in the ’70s. Then John Baldetti, Fernando’s son, bought a ravioli machine

Denis Krdzalic (center) with Tom Baldetti, Chef Paolo Pittia and Pete Baldetti. | ANDY PAULISSEN

in New York and began making ravioli as the Louisa brand in a two-family flat in Baden. Out of the residence, the Baldettis were delivering their ravioli to restaurants across the metro area. Back then, food distribution juggernauts like US Foods and Sysco were less dominant, so restaurants frequently ordered their ingredients through local suppliers such as Louisa. Louisa’s ravioli wasn’t “toasted” by the Baldettis until about 50 years ago, according to Pete Baldetti, the plant manager at Louisa. Then, a customer asked for it to be breaded, and things changed. “So, they bought like a little tiny thing,” Pete Baldetti says. “It’s like a little round tunnel that turned on wheels. It was like a chicken breader I guess.” Going from that tiny chicken breader to today’s factory with Italian-made machines the size of trains, Louisa has grown its brand, and with it, the notoriety of the toasted ravioli. The company eventually moved to another Baden facility, and then it’s current Jennings plant in 1989, attracting workers like Krdzalic with it. Two days before Krdzalic started driving forklifts at Louisa, he was washing windows, trying to make some cash. He came to America single and found a place to live in south city. After a successful interview

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with John Baldetti — the owner of Louisa Foods at the time — rdzalic worked his first shift on September 19, 1994, another date locked in his mind. In Krdzalic’s early days there, he biked to work. All he had to navigate St. Louis at the time was a printed map someone had given him, and he followed a wandering bus route that zigzagged through the south side. “I would ride, but I didn’t know any shortcut because of how the bus [ran],” he says. “So, it took me about 50 minutes.” ver time, rdzalic figured out those shortcuts and began to settle into his new city. He was doing basic, entry-level work at Louisa when he began, but he felt challenged at work as he struggled with an unfamiliar language, culture and people. That’s what made him stick with the company. “I stay long because I start moving really, relatively fast to the different kinds of jobs, the different responsibilities — every time more and more responsibility,” Krdzalic says. “So it’s [a] challenge for me, and I like that.” Krdzalic worked eighteen months before getting a first promotion, and that’s about the time he ate his first t-rav. And he liked it. t’s so specific for idwest and everything,” Krdzalic says. “I think it has some kind of appeal …

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Once made in the Baldetti family’s flat, Louisa’s t-ravs are now produced in Jennings and shipped around the country. | ANDY PAULISSEN

T-RAV NATION Continued from pg 13

it’s a great product.” But in his early months at Louisa, he took home the company’s lasagna, not toasted ravioli, because it was easy to make. “I came here as a single guy, you know, just me,” he says. “We are coming from parts of the world [where it’s] not too custom for males to be really good and familiar with the kitchen. … Just, I need to put it in the oven. It’s like big deal for me, I can go all week.” Climbing his way up, Krdzalic became a living Wikipedia of Louisa — it seems like he knows everything about the company. He also took on the role of an unofficial interpreter. hen first got here — retired from the Air Force in 2003 — Denis was a second-shift supervisor,” Pete Baldetti says. “And that shift had probably 75 or 80 percent Bosnian people, so it really made it so he could be very effective in the communication and everything.” On a recent morning on the windowless, timeless factory floor of Louisa, rdzalic points his finger at workers huddled over a production line. “Mexico, Bosnia, Jennings, Jennings, Venezuela … Nigeria and Myanmar,” he says, describing the varied nationalities of those shifting boxes of ravioli into bigger boxes. Krdzalic, 50, is now the pro-

Every shift, Krdzalic finds a way to communicate with production-floor workers from about 30 countries, whether it be through pushing a thin vocabulary to its limit or using hand signals. In that process, he has stretched his own international dictionary. duction manager at Louisa. Every shift, he finds a way to communicate with production-floor workers from about 30 countries, whether it be through pushing a thin vocabulary to its limit or using hand signals. In that process, he has stretched his own international dictionary. “Every time somebody calls with a foreign language, they transfer it to me, like I know 50 languages,” Krdzalic says. And just about everyone else at Louisa has grown their vocabulary, out of necessity. “I have a guy in the freezer, Korean, who knows at least twenty Bosnian words,” Krdzalic says, shouting over the constant hum of big machines. “He knows probably 50 with the bad ones.” From ravioli being stamped out, to boxes of oven-ready ravioli rolling off the line, all the steps involved in making a Louisa toasted raviolo occur on one uninterrupted line. “Nobody knows who invented toasted ravioli,” says Tom Baldet-

ti. “I think I do know that we’re the first ones to make a continuous process.” All the pieces — and workers, with how they communicate — need to be synchronized for things to work. The first pieces, including raw ingredients such as diced vegetables, shredded parmesan cheese and ground beef, start off in vegetable, cheese and meat rooms steeped in the aromas of their ingredients. Krdzalic reminisces back to when workers would set up shop in the vegetable room, hand-peeling onions for the next day’s production. Although onions come to the factory pre-peeled now, Louisa products start with the fundamentals. Mushrooms are inspected by hand when they arrive, vegetables are cut fresh, and 15,000 pounds of cheese per shift gets grated through a two-step process, he says. Many of these ingredients converge in a production kitchen. Unlike your kitchen, there aren’t any stovetops, toasters or Whirl-

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pool ovens, but rather 500-gallon tanks that can cook off up to 3,000 pounds of filling each batch, according to Krdzalic, who moves aside for workers carting heavy tubs of the ingredients through the room. Walking out of the kitchen, you see the lines. A handful of production lines snake through the busy factory. The scene feels a little like a Willy Wonka factory. Walking around, you come inches from machines heated to hundreds of degrees and occasionally have to step over pipes. The company pushes out 40,000 pounds of breaded ravioli per shift. Conveyor belts and rotors push the pasta from one end of a line to another, through Italian-crafted machines that cook an array of products, including gnocchi and tortellini. T-ravs start as dough. Flour flows from a ceiling duct into automated mixers set on a platform that rises above the production floor. The combination then gets “mixed, mixed, mixed,” as Krdzalic says, and sent to each line. The dough lands in extruders that squeeze out uniform sheets. For the t-ravs, it takes two sheets of dough to encase the filling, which is inserted by pistons. That’s how Krdzalic says it should be. “Some companies, they cheat,” he says. “They make one single pasta. They flip it over and they call [it] ravioli. … That’s a different kind of pasta.” Custom-made Italian dies then pop out uniform ravioli. Louisa has shelves of these antique dies ready to go. Along with other parts, they get tweaked to custom specifications by the company’s mechanics, Krdzalic says. “We will buy some stuff and we will modify it,” he says. “That’s nice, to be part of something that it’s, no, it’s just not like blasting ravioli.” The individual ravioli travel along the line and into piping-hot blanchers. Workers stand by the blanchers, making sure nothing goes wrong. Then, the cooked ravioli moves through the batter and breading, a particularly Midwestern touch. From there, the ravioli travels through a centerpiece of Louisa’s factory floor: a spiral freezer. Added to the factory in 2004, the freezer can harden t-ravs in about 20 minutes, Krdzalic says. The freezer is contained in a person-less room that looks like an archetype of the North Pole. Snow-like moisture latches onto every surface in the room, illuminated by a blue-white haze. Large fans, which aid the cooling sys-

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Louisa’s green boxes of t-ravs are a familiar sight in grocery stores. | ANDY PAULISSEN tem, make things loud. “[In] wintertime, you will have more icicles and ice,” Krdzalic says, opening a door to reveal the arctic scene. “In summer … it will feel like Siberia.” Krdzalic answers the main what-if question before it is even posed. “If you turn [the fans] off, it’s actually bearable,” he says. “You can survive here probably five hours. The fans on, maybe fifteen minutes.” Next the ravioli moves to boxes and workers. A woman grabs green boxes of toasted ravioli for retail sale in pairs and swings them into bigger cardboard containers with skilled form. Unlike the toasted ravioli that get sent to local restaurants and national chains with fryers, t-ravs in the green boxes are meant for home-cooking, and get flash-fried for about fifteen seconds to be oven ready. Once, Krdzalic says, the macro fryer these t-ravs roll through randomly released a fire-suppressant system when he was right by it. “I told [a] guy, ‘I thought it’s gonna be like an instant, freaking, you know,” he says about the explosion he expected. “[I] was like one yard away. I just walked out.” In Krdzalic’s new position, it’s his job to respond to crises like this pseudo-fire and oversee production — a tough role. “We’re just trying to make it so that he doesn’t die,” Pete Baldetti jokes. During Krdzalic’s career at Lou-

isa, life has changed for him. He has a wife and two kids now, and he lives in south county. He takes a vacation every year, exploring St. Louis and the United States — or rediscovering Europe. “Every year, I go on vacation, because my father taught me that, and I’m from Europe,” Krdzalic says. “Your vacation is [a] sacred thing.” But a lot, too, hasn’t changed. Every day after work, as Krdzalic has done since getting a car, he just sits for a minute. “If I’m close to four o’clock, then I will listen to the news,” he says. “If it’s already past four o’clock, then I will switch to the music, and I will sit for about a minute, minute and a half. And I have this satisfaction that we did something today, that I made something, that I resolved something.” If Krdzalic ever loses that feeling of satisfaction, he says, he will leave Louisa. But in 27 years, he hasn’t, and that goes for his love for the company, too. “Every time I go to any stores to get my beer or something, I always make a detour around the frozen food, and I check Louisa retail section and see what is missing or what, how they look and what’s the date there,” he says. So, Krdzalic will continue to lead Louisa’s production floor, supervising workers who, like him, came to the country with nothing, crafting a product which brings St. Louis pride: toasted ravioli. “It’s something so American,” he says. n

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AUGUST 25-31, 2021

RIVERFRONT TIMES

AUGUST 25-31, 2021

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CAFE

[REVIEW]

Meat with a Mission Have A Cow serves its community with grass-fed beef burgers in a charming cafe setting Written by

CHERYL BAEHR Have A Cow Urban Farm Store and Cafe 2742 Lafayette Avenue, 314-261-0305. Mon.-Sat. 7.a.m.-3 p.m. (Closed Sundays.)

teve St. Pierre will never forget the reactions from the people in his circle when he told them that he was leaving behind his home in Edwardsville, Illinois, and moving his family to north St. Louis. Instead of quizzical looks, questions about his motivations and plans, or words of encouragement, the comments that were thrown his way ranged from doom to gloom. Why on earth would he do such a thing? Did he not realize he was going to ruin his young children’s lives? Wasn’t he scared? St. Pierre wasn’t necessarily taken aback, because he, too, had similar questions. Edwardsville had been his home for eighteen years; there, he, his wife Lisa and their three young children had good lives, a nice home, a successful toy store and by all markers were doing well. However, St. Pierre could not help but feel that he was being called to do something different. He describes the feeling as a crisis of faith wherein he began questioning the Christian tradition he had been brought up in and what it really meant. These questions got even more urgent while on a mission to Kenya with his church. There, he was particularly moved by the story of a seven-year-old girl who had lost both her parents to AIDS and had recently been attacked while manning her uncle’s home, and he questioned how the God he believes in could allow such suffering. That’s when it hit him: To truly live in the love he wanted to live in, he had to enter

A delicious mission: Field Greens salad, The Whole Farm burger, sides, cinnamon roll, The Porker sandwich and pancakes. | MABEL SUEN

Co-owners Steve and Lisa St. Pierre with their daughter Grace. | MABEL SUEN into the places where that seemed to be lacking. When he left for the trip, he thought that place might be Kenya. However, before returning to the States, he realized that he was being called somewhere a little closer to home. He shared his thoughts with his wife, and less than a week after landing home, they were looking at a house off of oodfellow Boulevard, five blocks north of the Delmar Loop. They closed on it a month later, packed

up their belongings, and left Edwardsville to start their new life in the community they wanted to serve. That service took the form of Restore St. Louis, a ministry that helps people in the community with things like home repair, health care and tutoring. The organization also started a school and put significant effort into trying to combat human tra cking in the area — tremendously important efforts but, as St. Pierre

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would come to realize after a conversation with a local gang member, efforts that were incomplete. During that talk, the young man in question told St. Pierre that, while he appreciated all that he was doing, what his community really needed was jobs. His words hit St. Pierre hard, and while on a plane back from a speaking engagement, St. Pierre started sketching out a plan for what a jobs-focused ministry would look like. By the time he landed, he had the full plan for Have A Cow Cattle Company, Urban Farm Store and Café. To call the entire Have A Cow operation ambitious is an understatement. Though they had no farming experience, the St. Pierres bought a 180-acre cattle ranch in Owensville, Missouri, in 2017 and established a herd to begin producing grass-fed beef. Four years later, that beef is sold directly to consumers and at Have A Cow’s Urban Farm Store and Cafe, which is located in St. Louis’ Gate District. All three prongs of the outfit — the farm, the store and the restaurant — exist with the intention of providing job opportunities for people throughout the St. Louis community. St. Pierre admits it’s a corny thing

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Continued on pg 21

RIVERFRONT TIMES

Presented by

+ 0 3 IPATING PARTIC RANTS RESTAU

5 Taco Specials

Offer valid for dine-in or to-go at participating restaurants. Stay tuned for more info and a full list of restaurants at: STLTacoWeek.com stltacoweek.com |

@stltacoweek | #stltacoweek

Participating restaurants coming soon! 20

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The kitchen crew at Have A Cow Urban Farm Store and Cafe. | MABEL SUEN

HAVE A COW

Continued from pg 19

to say, but he truly believes that his mission with Have A Cow is to love and serve one another. It’s a nebulous idea, but one that he and his staff carry out through kind hospitality and delicious food. Though he admits that the food component is second to his overall social mission, he and his team have still taken great care to create tasty American breakfast and lunch fare. This is especially evident in the cafe’s burgers, which use the local, grass-fed beef produced at the Have A Cow cattle ranch. The meat is incredibly fresh, simply seasoned and cooked perfectly to temperature. Good on its own propped on a buttery brioche bun as the Half-Pounder, the burger also shines as the more decadent Whole Farm option with a farm egg, bacon and cheese. Have A Cow’s Triple S sandwich is another delicious use of the ranch’s beef. This riff on a Philly cheesesteak pairs hunks of the tender meat with grilled peppers, onions and pepperjack cheese, all tucked into a pillow-soft hoagie bun. Another sandwich, the Barnyard Chick, is equally well executed. Dressed (optionally) with avocado, Swiss, bacon and honey mustard, the chicken is plump, juicy and well seasoned. It’s straightforward comfort. Though the burgers give it a run for its money, Have A Cow’s chili may be the cafe’s tastiest dish. This thick concoction, brimming with chunks of beef, beans and rusticchopped mild green chiles, is a hearty, mouthwatering affair. On a hot summer day, it was still enjoyable; in the heart of winter, it will be a must-have dish. For breakfast, Have A Cow offers traditional favorites like farm eggs

cooked to order, thick-cut bacon, biscuits and gravy, and wa es. Pancakes are a standout; thinner than a traditional hotcake but fluffier than a crepe, the cakes have a wonderfully crispy edge that gives them an almost savory undertone. The quiche, made from a puff pastry shell, is equally delicious. Filled with ricotta, cheddar, bell peppers, onions and spinach, it’s a wonderful treat that works well for breakfast or for lunch. St. Pierre is thrilled with the way the cafe has come together and the response he’s received. Already, he feels that he has been able to create a community that draws from a kaleidoscope of backgrounds, even in the midst of a pandemic, which makes such relational activities di cult. e still feels there is significant work to be done, however, and he admits that there are some things that have not yet come to fruition. If there’s one thing that gives him hope that they will one day, it’s his son, who was twelve years old when the St. Pierres packed up and moved their lives from Edwardsville to north St. Louis. Instead of the move ruining his life, as so many had warned, he went on to graduate from high school, attend Truman State University, the Missouri University of Science and Technology, and get a job working for Boeing. He recently moved into the same north-city neighborhood where he grew up with his wife and eight-month-old son. Sometimes, St. Pierre likes to joke with him that he’s going to ruin his son’s life. To that, he replies, “No, Dad, I’m all in.”

Have A Cow Urban Farm Store and Cafe Have A Cow Burger ............................. $10.75 Cattleman’s Chili (bowl) ............................. $6 Bunkhouse Breakfast ..........................$11.50

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RIVERFRONT TIMES

SHORT ORDERS

[ S T. L O U I S S TA N D A R D S ]

Slice of Life Opened in 1956, Frank & Helen’s Pizzeria is a St. Louis family tradition Written by

CHERYL BAEHR

hen Rebecca Horvath wants to get across just how seriously she takes her role as a steward of the Frank & Helen’s Pizzeria legacy, she brings up the light fi tures. The jewel-toned, vintage Tiffany-style chandeliers have been casting a warm glow over the restaurant’s dining room for decades — through generations of diners, three ownership changes and the necessary updates to the old cinderblock building. On Horvath’s watch, that will never change. “We’ve done updates, but this still looks like a 1970s pizzeria, and we want to keep it that way,” orvath says. The lights are e tra special. Even if we remodeled the entire place, we’d still keep the lights. I have my staff ask me what we’d do if there was a fire, and tell them that everyone needs to grab a light and run.” Whether or not those chandeliers have been hanging at Frank & Helen’s since its beginnings in 1956 is one of those details lost to history. What is known is that the restaurant wasn’t started by Frank or Helen. Founded as Jule’s Pizza Place at the corner of Olive and Midland boulevards by Julius Seitz 65 years ago, the restaurant would undergo its name change when Julius sold the place to his brother, Frank, in 1959. Frank changed the name to Frank’s Pizza, but that would be short-lived; about a year later, he brought on his sister, Helen, as a partner, sealing the deal on the moniker for posterity. Though there were several restaurants along that stretch of Olive Boulevard that catered to the area’s families and high school students, Frank & Helen’s became a favorite and quickly grew out of its space. Though the brother

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AUGUST 25-31, 2021

“The lights are extra special,” says owner Rebecca Horvath. Everything is proudly old school at Frank and Helen’s. “We make our pizze the old-fashioned way and haven’t changed our recipes,” she says. Over the decades, sitting down together as a family here has become a tradition that extends across generations. | ANDY PAULISSEN

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The composition of the creamy garlic dressing is such a closely held secret that, for most of his tenure, Frank insisted he be the only one to make it so as not to give away his recipe. and sister bought the adjacent storefront to e pand their dining room, it still wasn’t enough room, and they decided to look for larger digs. They never dreamed that would come in the form of a car wash, but when Frank happened upon the barebones building, he knew he’d found their spot. In no time, they blocked off the front and back car entrances, moved in the equipment and set up shop to open in 19 for their first guests to the restaurant’s current home at 8111 Olive Boulevard. Frank and Helen owned the restaurant for 35 years, gaining a following for their pizza, steaks, broasted chicken and house creamy garlic dressing — which is such a closely held secret that, for most of his tenure, Frank insisted he be the only one to make it so as not to give away his recipe. He and Helen knew their guests by name, manning the front door and welcoming them in, oftentimes to the prearranged tables they’d denote with a black plastic “Reserved” placard. Their presence was a constant, so it was reassuring to longtime regulars that, when they were ready to retire, they sold the restaurant to one of their waitresses. She eventually sold it to a niversity City police o cer and his wife, who ran the place for about ten years before Horvath and her husband, Patrick, took over in 2008. For the Horvaths, owning Frank & Helen’s is the realization of a dream that began under the prior

owners in 2002. As orvath e plains, Patrick was best friends with the University City police officer who owned the restaurant and served as his manager when he needed e tra help. There was always the e pectation that he would eventually sell it to Patrick, and though there was a point when the Horvaths didn’t know if that would come true, he eventually handed over the reins, placing it into the hands of two people who he knew would take good care of such an institution. “We try to stay true to our roots,” Horvath says. “We make our pizza the old-fashioned way and haven’t changed our recipes. We still make the crust, sauce, grind the cheese each day and make our own sausage from the original recipe. Even one of the ovens we have is still the original. We call it ‘Frank’ and the other one is ‘Helen 2.0.’ We had both originals until the original Helen gave out on us, but Frank is still original, and he’s the one we use when we have to cook a pizza on the fly because he’s the fastest.” As firmly as they want to adhere to the old way of doing things, the Horvaths have made some changes that they feel make the restaurant better. Horvath admits it’s a balance, but she stands by their decision to get rid of the canned corn and green beans and frozen appetizers, even as those lessthan-ideal originals were hard for some regulars to let go. Despite those cries for the canned corn, though, they have earned the trust of the longtime guests who are happy that they can still bite into that ridiculously juicy broasted chicken — maybe dipped in some creamy garlic dressing — and share their joy with their children, and children’s children. “Not a day goes by that we don’t have at least two people come in and tell us that they have been coming here for 40, 50 or 60 years,” Horvath says. “They tell us this is where their grandparents had their first date, and it’s cool to be a part of those family traditions. t definitely puts an added pressure on us that if we go under, we are taking someone’s family memories with us. We don’t want to fail, so it makes us heighten our game, because we know this is something that is supposed to be in St. Louis.” n

MARSH Grocery Cooperative opened on Saturday in the city’s Carondelet neighborhood. | COURTESY OF MARSH GROCERY COOPERATIVE

[FOOD NEWS]

MARSH Grocery Co-Op Tackles Food Insecurity Written by

CHERYL BAEHR

t. Louis’ Carondelet neighborhood is now home to a brick-and-mortar, community-owned grocery store. The new project, MARSH Grocery Cooperative (6917 South Broadway), celebrated its grand opening Saturday, with the vision of addressing the intersection of food justice and social justice. Described as a way to bridge the gap “between ecologically sound, nutrientdense foods and affordability,” MARSH Grocery Cooperative will operate on a sliding-scale model whereby shoppers pay what they can afford. According to Beth Neff, one of the worker-owners and MARSH’s founder, the store will increase accessibility of nutritious and environmentally friendly food, both geographically and financially. “Food insecurity is a big issue, but there are so many other issues that prevent people from eating nutrient-dense food or from having a plot of land to farm,” Neff says. “People choose the food they choose because of extremely complex, interrelated issues. Here, we are trying to see what happens when we

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build our own grassroots food system from bare bones. We want to envision and try to build it rather than going off of default models of how things are done.” As Neff explains, the idea for MARSH (which stands for Materializing and Activating Radical Social Habitus) originated with her and her daughter, who were looking for a way to connect Neff’s background in food-based social practices with her daughter’s interest in cultural arts. Their ideas coalesced once they found a building in Carondelet that — though in need of serious rehabilitation — seemed like the perfect place to establish their multifaceted cooperative that would consist of a diner, grocery store and online shop. However, after taking over the building in 2019, they encountered serious setbacks, including the pandemic and a massive basement flood that destroyed expensive heating and water systems. That forced them to reassess what they were able to offer initially. “We had to switch gears that first year and start with the grocery cooperative, because that was the piece that made the most sense,” Neff explains. “We developed an online catalogue, connected with suppliers and opened the cooperative about two weeks before the COVID shutdown, which really honed our focus.” In addition to running the online food co-op during the pandemic, MARSH partnered with local food pantries and St. Louis Mutual Aid to provide grocerContinued on pg 24

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[IN MEMORIAM]

R.I.P. Chef Ma St. Louis mourns the death of the legendary owner of Chef Ma’s Chinese Gourmet Written by

CHERYL BAEHR

he St. Louis food scene has lost one of its greats: Chef Ying Jing Ma, known as “Chef Ma,” died on August 5. Ma leaves behind a legion of fans who came to know him for his culinary prowess over the years, most recently at his Overland restaurant, Chef Ma’s Chinese Gourmet (10440 Page Avenue, Overland; 314-395-8797). A representative of Chef Ma’s Chinese ourmet confirmed a’s passing to the Riverfront Times, though they did not offer any details out of respect for his family. The representative emphasized that the restaurant has continued to operate since Ma’s passing and that, even in their grief, his employees are committed to continuing his legacy and plan to keep the restaurant open, as he would have wanted. A veteran chef with numerous accolades (including his most prized award for a version of Iron Chef in Austin, Texas), Ma was known for his broad appeal to both diners in search of outstanding Chinese American fare as well as those looking for traditional Chinese dishes. He got his start

MARSH

Continued from pg 23

ies and prepared foods to those in the area who were struggling to find and buy food. Through their work, they made connections with other organizations in town and learned a lot about how several different issues like employment, housing and food insecurity were affecting people in the community. Based on what they observed, they wrote a grant to the USDA’s Healthy Food Funding Initiative and were awarded funds that would allow them to launch their brick-and-mortar operation to address these issues. As Neff explains, the MARSH Grocery Cooperative will function like a traditional grocery store in the sense that anyone

Chef Ma will be remembered for his outstanding restaurant and otherworldly cooking prowess. | MABEL SUEN

Chef Ying Jing Ma was a favorite of diners but also of other chefs in St. Louis. | MABEL SUEN more than 40 years ago in his native Hong Kong with Marriott Hotels and opened properties for the brand around the globe in such locations as Singapore, Malaysia, Hawaii, Los Angeles and San Francisco. Ma arrived in St. Louis in the early 1990s to work for Mandarin House, where he ran the iconic restaurant’s massive banquet operation for several decades. In 2015, Ma struck out on his own, opening an unassuming restaurant, Chef Ma’s Chinese Gourmet, in a former Taco Bell in Overland. There, he gained a reputation for everything from his outstanding fish stew which wasn’t always on the menu, but when it wasn’t, he would bring it out on request) to twice-cooked pork, black pepper beef, pumpkin brown butter shrimp and his house speciality, Hainan chicken. is mastery of flavor and fierce

commitment to perfection was evident in everything he did, even in ubiquitous American-style dishes like hot braised chicken and Mongolian beef, whose sauces he insisted on cooking from scratch. Even when he moved the restaurant to its current location in Overland just a few months ago, he never wavered from his commitment to putting his best into everything he did. Joel Crespo, owner of Guerrilla Street Food and regular guest at Chef Ma’s Gourmet Cuisine, remembers Ma as one of the best cooks in town and an unsung genius in the city’s food scene. “He was so ambitious and a beast of a cook,” Crespo says. “He had two menus — one more of your traditional Chinese takeout menu and one that was more authentic Chinese — and no matter whether he was doing orange

can come in and shop for a variety of products, including produce grown on the property’s vegetable garden, meat and prepared foods. Instead of prices, shelves will be labeled with how much each item costs the cooperative to provide; when shoppers head to the checkout, they will be given the option to pay what they can, whether that means more or less than the labeled amount. “The point of the sliding scale is that if you are only looking at things like quality and less environmental impact, say with grass-fed beef for instance, it may be better quality, have less fat and have less impact, but those things don’t mean anything to you if you only have a certain amount of money in your pocket or on your EBT card,” Neff says. “Our hope is that getting quality food will help improve

your family’s well-being, and you can decide for yourself how much that is worth to you and what you can afford.” Though you do not have to be a member of the MARSH co-op to shop at the store, Neff hopes that people will join and they’re offering several ways to do so, including purchasing a one-time $100 membership, donating time and becoming an automatic member after shopping at the store ten times. As she explains, members are what make up the cooperative and get to vote on board members as well as help craft the organization’s mission. “We’re just so excited about this being a place of mutual benefit for workers, producers and consumers,” Neff says. “We’re ready to tell everybody that we’re here.” n

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chicken and crab Rangoon or Hainan chicken and pumpkin shrimp, he would execute it with the same perfection and consistency, and he would nail it every time. It was always fresh, and I feel like he did it so effortlessly. Living where I live, there are hundreds of great Chinese restaurants with varying styles, and as much as I love so many of them, anytime someone would ask where was a good Chinese place to go, I’d always recommend Chef Ma’s.” For Crespo, Ma’s greatness extended beyond his talents as a chef. “Every time you went there, it was him touching all the food and doing all of the cooking, no matter what day of the week it was,” Crespo says. “He’d always be doing five things — flipping woks and plating up dishes — but he would see you, and he would be personable and remember you and remember details of your life. I will remember that level of kindness. He wasn’t just a masterful cook; he was a kind person.” Crespo also knows that kindness extended to the staff at Chef Ma’s. “My heart goes out to his family and to the people at the restaurant,” Crespo says. “It seemed like they were a close-knit group, and I know how that is — whether they are actual family or restaurant family, that’s a special relationship, and I know how much they are hurting. I wish them strength and peace.” A visitation for Ma was held on Wednesday, August 18, at Valhalla Cemetery and Funeral Chapel. As for the restaurant, it continues to operate with its normal hours, and his staff plans to do so indefinitely. Though grief-stricken, the representative from the restaurant explains that it is the best way they know to honor the man who dedicated his life to making the world a more delicious place. n

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REEFERFRONT TIMES

[WEED NEWS]

High Waters O’Fallon Brewery, Swade Cannabis team up for Mohi, a nonalcoholic THC-infused beer Written by

DANIEL HILL

ans of nonalcoholic beverages and nonflammable T C have great cause for celebration this week, as Swade Cannabis and O’Fallon Brewery have teamed up to launch a new cannabis-infused craft beer. The new brew, dubbed ohi, pairs ’ allon Brewery’s beermaking prowess with Swade Cannabis’ parent company BeLeaf to produce the stoney new suds. And while the team could have opted to simply leave the alcohol in the beverage, making for a doublewhammy drink that would make even our Loco blush, they opted instead to employ some capital-S Science in order to deliver an option suited for those who prefer to go alcohol free. e determined that consumers who like craft beer would also want similar options for non alcohol beer,” says Brian Owens, head brewmaster for ’ allon Brewery, in a press release. The ’ allon process is truly uni ue — we start with a traditional beer recipe, which goes through full fermentation, and then we gently remove the alcohol in vacuum under strict temperature controls. e end up with great A beer that tastes as close to real beer as you can get.” The result, according to the release, is a beverage that delivers craft-beer taste with only 80 calories, with each twelve-ounce can packed with five milligrams of emulsified T C. The effort is the latest development in two trends that have been building in recent years: the nonalcoholic craft beer craze, with ellbeing Brewing Co. being the local torchbearer, and drinkable cannabis beverages such as the eef Cola line of drinks sold in most local dispensaries. According to BeLeaf C itch

Mohi aims for the sweet spot where non-alcoholic craft beer meets THC-infused drinks. | VIA SWADE CANNABIS yers, combining the two ust makes good sense. e have seen the immediate embrace of T C-infused beverages, and the growing buzz around alcohol alternatives in society as a whole, so we knew the demand for new and better adult beverage options was e ploding beyond the cannabis world, and O’Fallon Brewery was the perfect place to start, eyers says. e think the brand will be a favorite and we know that patients are looking for new ways to consume cannabis. The scientific heavy lifting is made possible through BeLeaf’s Phytos manufacturing brand, which employs methods such as C 2 e traction, ethanol e traction and hydrocarbon e traction to produce the company’s live resin and other non-flower products. The process by which they infused

The process by which they infuse the brews with THC will make for a stronger and faster onset of effects than more traditional edibles — which can take around an hour to begin to kick in. riverfronttimes.com

the brews with T C will make for a stronger and faster onset of effects than more traditional edibles — which can take around an hour to begin to kick in — according to the company. ohi uses natural flavors, which give it a refreshing orange citrus and vanilla flavor, and contains nano emulsified T C, BeLeaf CS Stephanie Cernicek says. This means that the onset occurs uickly and stronger than its traditional counterpart, usually within the first fifteen minutes, and gives the patient full control of their e perience. ohi is now available at all Swade locations. Pricing is set at $8 a can pre-ta , or $ 0 for a fourpack — but remember, you need to have a issouri medical card to purchase it. or more information, visit swadecannabis.com. n

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CULTURE

Fall Arts Guide Is Back In the midst of pandemic craziness, St. Louis’ artists have continued to create. Here’s how to see what you’ve been missing BY RFT STAFF

fter a seemingly endless period of COVID-induced artistic stasis, a time during which creators were forced to suspend the sharing of their works with the public (or, at best, find new and innovative ways to put themselves out there), 2021 has finally seen the reintroduction of the arts into our public lives. As vaccinations have rolled out across the country and people attempt in earnest to regain a sense of normalcy, we’re finding that the artists we love haven’t been just sitting on their hands throughout the pandemic — they’ve been honing their crafts, channeling di cult feelings into their work and re-emerging with a renewed sense of purpose. It’s not to say anything about whether any of this was worth it, but it is inspiring to see what St. Louis’ creative community is capable of doing under the most trying of circumstances. In keeping, our Fall Arts Guide celebrates some of the artistic endeavors we’re most excited about in this decidedly different year. Of course, no attempt to fully catalog all of these efforts would ever be complete; instead, we tasked several members of our staff with highlighting the stage productions, concerts, gallery showings and other forms of artistic expression that have most piqued their interest for this fall season. e’re crossing all of our fingers and toes that all these events are still able to go on as planned, but of course, with the delta variant bringing yet more uncertainty into our lives again, we’re all too aware that anything can happen. That is to say: ake sure you check with the venues and organizations behind these events before you leave your home, and make sure that you’re following all of the safety guidelines asked of you — chief among them, please get your shots! We’re ready for next year to be a full-blown and unmitigated

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arts extravaganza, but that’s going to take everyone pitching in to do their part. —Daniel Hill

St. Louis Sound

August 28, 2021 to January 22, 2023. Missouri History Museum, 5700 Lindell Boulevard. Free. 314-746-4599. There’s no question that music runs through the veins of St. Louis. From Scott Joplin to Chuck Berry to Jay Farrar to Nelly, there are St. Louis legends across almost every genre. To celebrate this fact, for the rest of this year through 2022, the issouri istory useum’s St. Louis Sound exhibit will be free to the public at the issouri istory Museum. Nearly 200 artifacts will be displayed from national acts, local legends and essential venues in the St. Louis music scene, including the stage floor from Mississippi Nights. Check out cool outfits worn by the all-female punk band the Welders, in addition to those worn by Willie Mae Ford Smith and Tina Turner. Guitar lovers will be drooling at the ones owned by Chuck Berry, Jeff Tweedy, Albert King and Mel Bay. There’s even a section of pieces from Gaslight Square during the jazz scene of the 1920s. There’s an exciting range of items to see, and not just from the places in STL music history you’re so used to seeing highlighted. And for your listening pleasure, bring your headphones to enjoy a curated playlist of St. Louis musicians while you browse the exhibit. —Jack Probst

Texts from My Family: A Comedy Show

8 p.m. Thursday, September 2. The Heavy Anchor, 5226 Gravois Avenue. $10. 314-352-5226. Families can be embarrassing. Luckily, parents and grandparents have learned to text, so everything doesn’t have to be a long-winded call about what your more successful siblings are doing or why you didn’t pick up the previous three times they called. In-

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Mama Cat is the subject of Theo Welling’s long-range photo project. | THEO WELLING stead, dads can text dad jokes and grandmas can text asking why in the world you would dye your hair pink, and it all stays safely in your phone. Texts From My Family is a show where the performers enter their passcodes to show off just how funny their interactions with their families genuinely are. Comedians mily ickner and Alexis Winford host an evening full of stories and texts from people like you. The evening features family stories from Matt Barnes, Danielle oward, Aaron Brooks, Angela Smith, Michelle Kidwell and Mandy Bouckaert. It’s an excellent opportunity to see that your family isn’t the weirdest one in St. Louis (or to recoil in horror when you realize they are.) —Jack Probst

The Works of Farah Al Qasimi

September 3 through February 13. Contemporary Art Museum, 3750 Washington Boulevard. Free. 314-535-4660. The time of the COVID-19 quarantine was productive for artist

Farah Al Qasimi. Featured in the Contemporary Art Museum beginning on September 3, her upcoming work spans a 60-foot wall. Titled “Everywhere there is splendor,” her exhibit has photography, video and performances. The multi-media work explores themes of culture, domesticity, labor and escapism. Several pieces feature family photographs or other pieces of her family’s history. A press release from the Contemporary Art Museum says Al Qasimi “found it ever more urgent to deepen her connection with her family’s past” after reflecting on the uncertainty of the future, along with the tumultuous past year. Additionally, four more exhibitions will debut at CAM alongside Al Qasimi’s exhibition, running from September 3 to February 13, 2022: “Shara Hughes: On Edge” includes more than 30 vibrant paintings and is the first ma or solo museum exhibition from the artist.

“Summer Brooks: The New Gar-

FALL ARTS GUIDE year. And while Hamlet and King Lear may tilt on the fate of nations, Clarke says the drama of Avengeance will be no less substantial or cutting in its portrayals of destiny and betrayal. “Right now, we’re in a tragic mode, but we don’t have to remain here,” she says, describing both the play’s setting and the neighborhood in which she still lives. “It’s a story of hope,” she adds, “and the hope is that people will come to understand that there is value here, and to stop giving up and walking away from it.” Avengeance premiers September 9 at 8 p.m. at the Annie alone ome in the ille neighborhood. For more information, visit stlshakes.org/production/ theville/ or call 314-531-9800. The performances are free. —Danny Wicentowski

Music at the Intersection Shakespeare in the Streets’ 2019 production of Love at the River’s Edge. The event is returning, this time as Avengeance, for three performances in September. | PHILLIP HAMER

den Variety” is scultpor Summer Brooks challenging beauty standards for African American women. A press release says the artist hopes “to engage viewers in conversations about stereotypes placed onto people of color by colorism and racism.” “Lorna Simpson: Heads” is an exhibition of two digital animation videos by Simpson herself. The videos detail Simpson’s process of working with collage and photo manipulation. “Kathy Butterly: Out of one, many / Headscapes” is a ceramic sculp-

ture exhibit. Butterly combines two different projects of hers, one set from 1996 to 2018 and one set mostly made just for the CAM exhibit. “Out of one, many” is based off pint glasses and explores female figures, while eadscapes surveys the mind. The Contemporary Art Museum is free and open to the public Thursdays, Saturdays and Sundays from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. and Fridays from 10 a.m. to 8 p.m. beginning on September 3. —Jenna Jones

Sweat

September 8 through 26. Edison Theatre, 6465 Forsyth Boulevard, University City. $15 to $55. 314-935-6543. Written by two-time Pulitzer

Prize-winning playwright Lynn Nottage, Sweat explores the intersection of economics, race and cultural identity through a meeting of friends in a fictional bar in Reading, Pennsylvania, with reviews of the play noting that its characters represent blue-collar workers who voted for Donald Trump as president. Described as a “deeply heartfelt drama” with plenty of humorous elements, the play sees its characters’ friendship tested by layoffs and the outsourcing of work, as the friends are forced to decide between looking out for one another or fending for themselves. The Black Rep’s production of the award-winning play is directed by Ron imes, and runs from September 8 through 26. For tickets and more information, visit theblackrep.org. —Daniel Hill

Shakespeare in the Streets: Avengeance

8 p.m. September 9 through 11. Annie Malone Home, 2612 Annie Malone Drive. Free. 314-531-0120. All the world’s a stage, and the St. Louis Shakespeare Festival is once again venturing beyond its summer home in Forest Park to prove it with Shakespeare in the Streets. Marking its tenth production after a pandemic-canceled 2020, the

annual program, which is free to the public, ventures into St. Louis neighborhoods to stage a locally produced original play inspired by one of the bard’s timeless classics. This year, that classic is none other than Hamlet — but in this adaptation, titled Avengeance, the tragedy departs from Hamlet’s royal anxieties in Denmark to land in the Ville in north St. Louis, where a young man wrestling with the decision to leave his family home is visited by the ghosts of famed comedian and activist Dick Gregory and pioneering Black hair-care entrepreneur Annie Malone. Written by Mariah Richardson and directed by Ville resident Thomasina Clarke, the play pivots on the notion of revenge for the current state of a once-thriving neighborhood now hard-hit by depopulation, disinvestment and disillusionment. “Hamlet’s premise is his father’s ghost coming back wanting to be avenged,” Clarke notes in an interview. “These ghosts have come back to ask for change, not just from the community, but from the city at large, which has abandoned them.” Among the all-persons-of-color cast is Carl Overly, Jr., who played Cornwall in St. Louis Shakespeare Festival’s nationally lauded production of King Lear earlier this

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September 10 through 12. Grand Boulevard and Washington Avenue. $55 to $300. The inaugural Music at the Intersection Festival will see headliners including Roy Ayers, Gregory Porter and Lalah athaway joined by more than forty local acts spanning across such genres as blues, rock & roll, jazz, soul, R&B and hip-hop. Additionally, national acts including Lee Fields & The Expressions, Jon Cleary & the Absolute Monster Gentlemen, kebe Shakedown, eyon arrold, the Soul Rebels featuring A, Bettye La ette, D - un , the Baylor Project and Don Bryant featuring the Bo-Keys will all perform as well. The ambitious undertaking will take place across six venues in Grand Center, with performances at the Fabulous Fox Theatre, the Big Top, the Sheldon Concert all, the randel Theatre, Jazz St. Louis and the Open Air tent. Tickets are available in the form of single- or multi-day passes, ranging from $55 to $300 for VIPs. For more information, visit musicattheintersection.org. —Daniel Hill

Dreaming Zenzile

September 10 to October 3. The Loretto-Hilton Center, 130 Edgar Road, Webster Groves. $29 to $99. 314-968-4925 The Rep is hosting not one, but two world premieres this fall. Up first: the long-awaited debut of Dreaming Zenzile kicks off the season and hits the stage on Septem-

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taken of St. Louis’ matron saint. “The loose goal is to make a book of it eventually,” he says, but at this show you can expect to see lush prints of the kinds of shots Welling has become known for: still portraits, portraits in motion, and an eye for the details that make a human being unique. Due to COVID-19, the show itself is appointment only, but there will be a reception on September 24 where Welling will speak about this project. And he’ll be just in time, because Mama Cat has made it known that she is moving to Florida soon. Some cities have characters; St. Louis has a pot-banging angel — at least for now. —Evan Sult

St. Louis Symphony Orchestra has a slate of (free!) shows planned for Forest Park this fall. | DILIP VISHWANAT

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ber 10. Originally scheduled for a March 2020 release but pushed back due to COVID-19, the musical maps the life of South African musician and activist Miriam Makeba. In an interview with the RFT in March 2020, the writer and main performer Somi Kakoma said that “the idea is that we just ask people to dream for 90 minutes.” Dreaming Zenzile will take place live at the Loretto-Hilton Center from September 10 to October 3. —Jenna Jones

Dinosaur Jr. with Ryley Walker

8 p.m., Thursday, September 16. The Pageant, 6161 Delmar Boulevard. $30 to $35. 314-726-6161. If you’ve been missing the power of live, loud, bone-crunching rock & roll during the pandemic, Dinosaur Jr. is ready to give you a booster dose. The September 16 concert will be one of the biggest shows to happen at the Pageant since it came back to life after suffering (yet somehow surviving through) the sudden closure of all things fun during the pandemic. And no nonmedical industry was hit harder than the live music entertainment business. While restaurants had to try to pivot to curbside and everyone else learned how to wear masks, the concert industry mostly sat, defeated, until people could get a vaccine. And while there are many more things we can do now since those first early dark days of the pandemic, live music has remained a rare treat. The Pageant is trying to keep the doors open, too, so there are rules in place now to help keep everyone safe. The ven-

ue was one of the first in town to announce that patrons must have a vaccine or a recent negative test to enter. And guests will need to wear a mask, too. But it’s a small price to pay to be baptised by the glory that is the Dinosaur Jr. live show. If you’ve seen it before, you know that in addition to the mask, you’ll want to bring earplugs, too. Dino does it loud. —Jaime Lees

Bacon and Babes: Drag Brunch

12 p.m. Sunday, September 19. Mad Art Gallery, 2727 South Twelfth Street. $40. 314-771-8230. Brunch has become a trendy meal to gather with friends, but it can be tiring to host it yourself. The bacon must be crisp, the eggs can’t be runny, the toast can’t be burnt and the mimosa must constantly be flowing for all your guests. It’s stressful as hell trying to please everyone, and your friends aren’t even Instagram influencers Solve all these problems by convincing your group to buy tickets to the Bacon and Babes Drag Brunch at Mad Art Gallery. You get all the fun of brunch without having to prepare it, plus there’s a drag show. Your $40 ticket includes a catered buffet by chef Ron Buechele and one complimentary mimosa. (Just one? Well, this is brunch, of course, so bucket mimosa specials are just $15.) Performers include Andy Whorehal, Chasity Valentino, Lucy Couture, Roxxy Malone and Noah Mazzaratie Steele. It’s bound to be a loud, proud and spectacular event not to be missed. —Jack Probst

SLSO at Forest Park

7 p.m. Wednesday, September 22. Art Hill, 1 Fine Arts Drive. Free. Once a year, the world-class musicians of the St. Louis Symphony

Orchestra serve up a free concert in the scenic environs of the world-class Forest Park. Led by Music Director Stéphane Denève, the SLSO delivers a selection of classical favorites, music from film and patriotic songs, capping off the event with a fireworks show. It’s the perfect excuse to pack a picnic basket and lay out a blanket at the base of Art Hill for a night of family fun or a romantic evening with the one you love — and all for free —Daniel Hill

Theo Welling: “Mama Cat,” Work in Progress

Friday, September 3-Saturday, September 25. Reception and artist talk 3 p.m. on Friday, September 24 at The May Gallery at Webster University, Sverdrup 123. Cathy Daniels, known not just in St. Louis but to activists around the world as Mama Cat, has been a force of humanitarian transformation for many years. But it was the police violence in Ferguson that brought about the PotBangerz, a nonprofit movement within the movement” aimed at getting hot food and essentials out to the unhoused population in St. Louis while advocating for their needs and rights as human beings and neighbors. Theo Welling has been documenting Mama Cat and her work for over a year, when he hasn’t been out shooting features and The Lede (see page 5) every week for the Riverfront Times (hey, thats’ us . t’s a mi ture of everything in her life,” he says. “Protest and politics, family life, outreach, opening a transitional house for women who are unhoused, and food. Food is the basis of everything.” This show at The May Gallery will be elling’s first chance to display some of the shots he’s

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The Rolling Stones

7:30 p.m. Sunday, September 26. The Dome at America’s Center, 701 Convention Plaza. $66.50 to $699. 314-342-5201. If the remaining Rolling Stones can survive this year, then so can we. Just recently, Rolling Stones drummer Charlie Watts dropped off of this tour shortly before passing away. But the deeply saddening loss of a core member of the band and one of the best drummers of all time could not stop this tour — not even a once-in-a-lifetime (hopefully) worldwide pandemic could stop this tour. The greatest living rock band in the world just keeps on pushing through and will likely continue to give performances that are second to none. It’s just what they do. This concert is a rescheduled date from June, when it was postponed because of COVID-19, so if you’re fully vaccinated and not scared of catching a breakthrough case, the concert gods (who now include Charlie Watts) are smiling down on you for this Rolling Stones appearance. There are plenty of tickets available for you to scoop up, including some spots in the pit that usually go for four times the price they’re listed at now. —Jaime Lees

The Gradient

October 1 through 24. The Center of Creative Arts, 6880 Washington Avenue. $25 to $85. 314-725-6555. Just after the Rep’s world-premiere of Dreaming Zenzile comes the first-ever performance of The Gradient. Written by Steph Del Rosso, the play is a satire. It takes place in the future, when men who are accused of sexual misconduct are taken to a facility that must rehabilitate them into responsible citizens. The show starts its run on October 1 at the Center of Creative Arts and ends on October 24. Purchase tickets online at repstl.org. —Jenna Jones

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SAVAGE LOVE QUICKIES BY DAN SAVAGE Hey, Dan: I’m a woman who recently went out on a third date with a man. I invited him back to my place and we started making out, which led to him going down on me. Moments later he took off his pants and to my surprise he had a micro penis. I was shocked and turned off. I did not want to continue, but knowing how sensitive men can be, I maintained a poker face, did my best to not let on that I was turned off, and he was able to orgasm. Is there a nice way to let someone know you do not want to continue to have sex because of their penis size? And is there a responsibility on the part of a person with a micro penis to disclose that fact before sex? I think I would’ve been less turned off if I wasn’t so shocked. Smaller Men And Lessons Learned I don’t believe you, SMALL. I don’t think you would’ve been any less shocked or turned off if this guy brought up the size of his dick between the start of the first date and the end of the third. And if he had, SMALL, you would’ve written me a letter about this weird guy who started telling you about his small dick and ended your letter with a shocked, “Who does that?” (And I would’ve said, “Guys into SPH, because otherwise there’s no reason someone would bring that up in advance.”) Look, dicks are a lot like labia: they come in all shapes and sizes, and you usually don’t know what you’re gonna get when you go to bed with someone for the first time. hile it’s fine to have a preference for larger or smaller, you should be prepared for natural variance and prepared to roll with it. If you can’t bear the thought of winding up in bed with a guy whose dick is too small for you, SMALL, then solicit dick pics in advance of a first date. r make a disclosure of your own: You’re a size queen who requires a guy to be packing at least [however many] inches. But if asking for dick pics and/or disclosing your dick preferences

in advance seems too forward, SMALL, you’re under no obligation to fuck a guy if you’re not into his dick. No one is obligated to go through with sex just to spare someone else’s feelings. We should try to be considerate of other people’s feelings, of course, which sometimes means offering up an excuse, however transparently false it might be. But you can get up and go whenever you like. Hey, Dan: I’m married to a wonderful woman. I know that’s where the BUT comes in, but it’s the truth. She’s fantastic. The challenge is sex. My wife always struggled with physical intimacy. She doesn’t like to have her neck or ears touched or really any form of gentle touch. These were favorites of mine, but we were compatible in other areas, so it wasn’t a big deal. It got worse after our children were born, and now her body is almost totally off limits to me and I’m really struggling. I’ve communicated that sex is important to me and she makes a good faith effort, but it’s strictly intercourse. I miss foreplay. I’ve tried to broach this subject and my wife gets very defensive. What are some baby steps I can propose? Touched Or Not There aren’t a lot of baby steps between someone not kissing your neck and someone kissing your neck, T , so unless your wife is willing to get into therapy and work on identifying the root cause of her aversion to touch — and there may not be one — there’s not much you can do. She might just not like it. If things got worse after the kids arrived, perhaps things will improve once they’re older. And if most of the childcare responsibilities fall on your wife’s shoulders, well, she might be all touched out by the time you come for her neck. But if you were sexually incompatible at the start of the relationship — if you never really clicked sexually — that’s a hard-bordering-on-impossible thing to reverse engineer years or decades in. Hey, Dan: I find when I ride one of my dildos anally that my back pain will go away, or at the very least lessen. I know there are all kinds of great chemicals that get released when a person comes but is there

Maybe you’ve stumbled over (and impaled yourself on) a unique version of the placebo effect — only you’re taking dildos, not sugar pills. more to this than that? Is it like acupuncture points, but in my ass? I’ve had physical issues with my back that physical therapy hasn’t been able to help. But stuffing my ass solved my back pain. Any insights? Anal Makes Everything Nice Maybe it’s physical, maybe it’s chemical, or maybe you’ve stumbled over (and impaled yourself on) a unique version of the placebo effect — only you’re taking dildos, not sugar pills. Don’t waste time wondering why this works, AMEN. Just be thankful it does. Hey, Dan: My husband and I are opening our relationship. I’m good looking enough to get a date easily, but my husband ... well, he’s ridiculously sexy to me, and he’s had enough hookups in his life to know he’s attractive to other women. But he’s in his late 30s now and — there’s no delicate way to put this — ear hair, long eyebrow hairs, nose hairs, receding hairline, long chest hairs that creep up his neck. TOO MUCH STRAY HAIR EVERYWHERE! From ten feet away he looks amazing but close he just looks unkempt. My question is this: How do I tell him? I’m all about body positivity but the kind of women he’s attracted to put time and care into their appearance and I think he should do the same! Hinting has not worked. I love him as is but don’t want to listen to him complain that it’s tough for a “middle-aged guy” to find a date. His age is not the issue! Husband Is Not Trying Enough Really

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A lot of young straight guys think a casual disregard for their own looks is masculine and alluring. And it often works — until those ear and nose hairs start coming in. At that point they think, “I’m not doing anything differently, but I’m not getting attention like I used to!” To get that same kind of attention, of course, they need to start doing things differently — e.g., they need to adopt new grooming practices and start taking better care of themselves. My advice: Stop hinting, HINTER, and start telling. Hey, Dan: I’m a young gay man who likes to be spanked hard. I tried dating nice guys, but they didn’t want to hurt me. Now I want to give kinky hookup apps a try, but I worry sadistic guys who do want to hurt me won’t be nice. I want to be hurt but I’m worried about being with someone who enjoys it too much. Does that make sense? I’m kind of stuck and could use a little push. Hate Extremely Limp Paddling You tried imploring vanilla nice guys to hurt you and that didn’t work, HELP, so it’s time to take a chance on kinky guys who do wanna hurt you. (That’s the push you wanted, right?) Some kinky people are assholes, of course, so use your best judgment and trust your gut. But I gotta say … some of the nicest guys I’ve ever met were sadists. It wasn’t just that these guys wanted to hurt me in safe, sane and mutually pleasurable ways and that was nice of them. They were genuinely sweet. At first, thought they might be overcompensating out of guilt, HELP, or, even worse, that their kindness was an act. But eventually I had to conclude that some sort of inverse relationship exists between being the kind of self-aware, selfactualized sadist who wants to do terrible things to someone who wants terrible things done to them, and just generally being a decent and thoughtful person. Now go get spanked by a guy who likes spanking you as much as you like getting spanked. mail@savagelove.net @FakeDanSavage on Twitter www.savagelovecast.com

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