BOOM! October 2022

The Necklift, Explained

In last month’s article I discussed the ins and outs of the “Facelift,” a popular cosmetic procedure used to reverse the signs of aging in the mid-face. This month I will discuss the nuances of a “Necklift,” a similarly powerful procedure used to rejuvenate the neck and jawline.

What is a “Necklift”?

The term “Necklift” describes a surgical procedure that reverses age-related changes to the neck. In a successful Necklift, redundant skin is excised, lax muscles are tightened, and excess neck fat is debulked. More experienced surgeons may implement additional techniques to improve neck contour which may include chin/jawline augmentation, gland reduction, or additional muscle trimming. Ultimately these techniques, used either alone or in combination, create a dramatically more rejuvenated appearance to the neck.

What is the downtime from a Necklift?

Contrary to public belief, recovery from a Necklift is generally well tolerated. Patients can expect for “Social downtime,” meaning the time it takes to be presentable in public, to last anywhere from 2-4 weeks. During this time, it is normal to expect bruising, swelling, numbness, and some mild discomfort.

What are the different types of “Necklift”?

The Necklift has evolved tremendously from its initial description wherein only redundant skin was removed, often creating the unsightly “pulled” look associated with such antiquated procedures. Now that we have a better understanding of the neck-related aging process, more comprehensive treatment options are available to address the underlying issues at hand.

To that effect several types of Necklift variations exist today, which can vary

Who is a good candidate for a surgical Necklift?

Men and women of any age who suffer from age-related neck changes would benefit from a Necklift, though for most people this represents their 40’s to 50’s. Ultimately, a detailed assessment of your underlying anatomy is required to determine if a Necklift coincides with your aesthetic goals and expectations.

What is the cost of a Necklift?

based on their incision requirements (behind the ear, and/or under the chin) and the underlying layers being treated (e.g., skin, fat, muscle, glands). Ultimately, the best thing you can do is to ask your surgeon how he plans to address each of your underlying problem areas as alluded to above, including redundant skin, loose muscle, excess fat, bulging submandibular glands, and/or poor jawline definition. Ultimately, every patient is different, and every surgeon is different; so, find someone whom you trust to deliver results consistent with your goals and expectations.

Are there non-surgical alternatives to a Necklift?

No. While several non-surgical options for neck rejuvenation exist, such as injectables (e.g., Botox, fillers, Kybella), lasers (e.g., CO2, IPL), threads, and energybased devices (e.g., radiofrequency, ultrasound), such options often require multiple treatments and are associated with relatively unpredictable, temporary, and limited results. So, while non-surgical alternatives do exist; however, they each have inherent limitations and should never be considered as an equal replacement to a surgical Necklift.

Total out-the-door cost of a Necklift varies considerably ($4,000 plus) and will be based upon your surgeon’s pricing, facility fees, and anesthesia charges. Of note, the surgery is typically performed in an outpatient setting under general anesthesia (you are asleep) and lasts anywhere from 2-4 hours depending on the extent of your surgery.

How can I learn more about a Necklift?

If you are interested in learning more about a Necklift, I suggest consulting with a surgeon experienced in facial rejuvenation surgery. This will ensure that you receive a comprehensive assessment and treatment plan. As a Board-Certified Facial Plastic Surgeon, I always encourage my patients to understand the treatment options available to them before deciding on their plan of action, as often-times, a combined modality (surgical and non-surgical) represents the best option.

As always, choose a surgeon whom you trust. There is nothing more important than the relationship you have with your doctor.

In Good Health,

Dr. Blake Raggio

Facial Plastic & Reconstructive Surgeon

Plastic and Reconstructive Surgery

Before and after Deep-plane Necklift (photo courtesy of Dr. Raggio; shared with patient’s permission)

The mission of BOOM! is to serve the folks of the River Region age 50 plus with information and ideas to inspire new experiences, better quality of life and new beginnings.

Publisher/Editor

Jim Watson

334.324.3472 cell/text

jim@riverregionboom.com

Contributing Writers

Jeff Barganier

Tracy Bhalla

Joy Blondheim

Christie Boucher

Greg Budell

Louise Chambers

Michele C. Hollow

Lisa Iannucci

Bertha Lazenby Knox

Tom Lawry

Susan Moore

Dr. Blake Raggio

Alexandra Raphael

Amy C. Rea

Nick Thomas

Liz Weston

Donna Woods

Cover Photography

Photography by DiAnna Paulk photographybydiannapaulk.com

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Jim Watson, 334.324.3472

jim@riverregionboom.com

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My Breast Cancer Story

Many of you have one. Mine began with my first wife, Marty. Each year during October I share my Breast Cancer Story with our readers. Everyone who has experienced Breast Cancer knows the bond we all share yet everyone’s story is unique. I consider my experience a blessing.

Breast Cancer’s Blessing

Could life be any better? My wife and I were truly enjoying the fruits of our labor. We were business partners; she was the boss and I was her advisor. We had been publishing Montgomery Parents for eight years and serving our community with something we thought was worth doing. We were “empty nesters”, and our schedules allowed for travel and plenty of time to love on the grandkids. Through our effort we had discovered the joy of “made for each other”, because both of us brought something to our marriage and business relationship the other didn’t have. We became a complete work of love. After a 40-year relationship stemming from a 9th grade history class encounter, Marty and I had discovered the “sweet spot” of happiness and we were enjoying the blessing of God’s design. And then we weren’t.

Marty Watson

In April of 2003, our lives changed. Marty and I were sitting in our living room as our family doctor told Marty she had metastatic breast cancer. We were paralyzed by the thought. It’s as if our brains were frozen. It was a Friday afternoon, so we would have to spend the weekend with this intruder; we were being held hostage by breast cancer until Monday’s appointment with the oncologist. We both struggled to understand the why. I researched breast cancer and learned too much while Marty began sharing with family and friends the “news” no one wanted to hear. As an optimist I was going to get to the bottom of this problem and find a solution. Marty, who had a deep faith, knew the solution was with God. Of course, we both would press and probe our doctors for answers and hope and got some of both. But in the end, our journey with breast cancer led to God and the peace that only He can provide. Breast cancer changed our lives, but God was the director.

I became a caregiver, and like many men, was pretty unfamiliar with the job description. But when your wife has breast cancer and every day together is truly precious, you ask a lot of dumb questions and you get smart quick. I’m not talking medical stuff, I’m talking laundry and cooking and pill organizing and, most importantly, serving. Marty lived 30 months after her diagnosis and I wouldn’t trade one moment of serving her for anything in this world. The blessing of serving is hard to realize and appreciate because we all want for ourselves. Our nature is to be selfish. But when you serve someone you forget about your needs and value someone else’s. I learned that from Marty. She was a selfless, caring person and when I took on that role in our lives it was an abundant blessing. Marty showed me where to find hope and how to never lose it. Our hope was and is in God. God’s blessings aren’t about being in the best place of your life, they’re about being in the best place with Him.

Our Cover Profile this month is Joy Blondheim, the founder, along with her husband Dickie, of the Joy to Life Foundation. Joy to Life has been a Godsend by providing free mammograms and other breast cancer screenings when necessary to medically underserved women in Alabama. They're having their annual Walk of Life fundraiser in downtown Montgomery on October 15th so be sure and collect your friends and family and show your support, it's the best way to show your love for all those in the Breast Cancer Community, we all need hope!

Thanks for taking a few moments of your valuable time and reading the October issue, and maybe sharing with friends and family, I appreciate the BOOM! Share. Age well my friends.

Jim 334.324.3472 cell/text

jim@riverregionboom.com

The World Has Changed How Should We respond?

There are few things more jarring and daunting than being dropped into a foreign culture, having to learn a new language, and navigating your way around. The overwhelming strangeness of absolutely everything leaves one feeling unequipped or unprepared for each new day. This is where the church in America finds itself today. Yet we did not move to a distant country, our country and culture became foreign to us.

Years ago, my wife and I packed up our young family and left America to serve the Lord 4000 miles from the Chicago suburb we had been serving in. I was ten years into full time student ministry as we embarked on this life changing venture. We moved to Cheshire, England. Though we knew it would be something of a culture change, we expected a common language and cultural similarities. We were naïve, underestimated the differences and found the first several months overwhelming. Fortunately, our priest was married to an American and they translated life for us.

The shift in culture that America has experienced has been so sudden and strange that it has left many youth and children’s ministry leaders scratching their heads. School teachers are experiencing much of the same. Nowhere is this shift more evident than in the area of sexual orientation and gender identity. To grasp the dramatic shift, consider the data of a 2021 study of over 12,000 US adults. The percentage of those who self-identify as LGBTQ has doubled with each generation. Specifically, that is 2.6% of Baby Boomers, 4.2% of Gen X, 10.5% of Millennials, and 20.8% of Gen Z.

For schoolteachers (my wife among them) there is a reality that most

preteens and teens are experiencing significant confusion around their identity. Every day they have students coming into class announcing a change in how they identify as they try to navigate their world. All this is being driven by our culture and it’s right here in South Carolina.

For youth ministers, there is a clear sense that if they teach anything counter to the cultural narrative, some students will drop out of youth group. Approaching cultural issues is like walking on eggshells. Speak with the wrong tone or words, and student’s eyes glaze over. By the way, this is also the experience of many who are working with college students.

A rapidly shifting cultural landscape is not only challenging for those of us in church leadership, but also overwhelming to kids growing up in the midst of it. We are seeing epidemic levels of anxiety and depression among children and teens in America. The suicide rate has risen drastically. Studies are showing us that despite being the most connected generation, teens today are also the loneliest.

Assuming that the rate of cultural change is unlikely to slow, how do we respond as God’s people? Let’s rule out the instinct to withdraw or hide; we are not likely to become like the Amish and isolate ourselves from the world around us. We need a strategy centered around the Gospel, loving others, being gracious, and remaining true to our faith. We need a reorientation that will especially benefit younger generations.

Three interconnected points of focus come to mind immediately based on what research is teaching us.

First, we need a renewed understanding of family and its place in ministry. We need our churches to be like big families and our families to be like little churches. The church and family need to be places of worship, discipleship, and serving others. They need to be the structures where we experience relational care, God’s love, forgiveness, and truth. It is God’s family in which kids need to find their identity and have that affirmed.

Second, we need a culture of hospitality centered in the family. Keep in mind the understanding of family just mentioned. We have to see the family as a unit where ministry takes place that not only raises up the next generation but blesses the world we are immersed in. When exiled to Babylon, God’s people were instructed to be a blessing to the place that God had put them. Our families need to be a blessing in their communities. Our churches, as God’s bigger family, need to be a blessing to their communities. Our kids growing up need to be part of how we love others and demonstrate God’s love to others.

Third, we need to be very intentional about the evangelism and discipleship of students (children, teens, and college) both in the church and in our communities. Everyone needs good news. We all need hope. The Gospel is Good News that gives us hope and transforms lives. It is no longer enough to provide Sunday School, VBS, and youth groups for our students and expect transformed lives in this rapidly changing culture. The world has changed too much for the church’s strategy for raising up kids to remain the same.

To learn more about these ideas visit www.engagingeverygeneration.com

Jest a Moment: Royal Humor

The closest I’ve ever come to royalty was holding four kings in a game of poker.

As a child growing up in a Commonwealth country in the early 60s, however, we were dutifully required to sing “God Save the Queen” during formal school assemblies.

Like so many others, I was deeply saddened to see the passing of Queen Elizabeth II in September. Since then, many commentators have reminisced about the queen, including tales of her delightful sense of humor which was suitably subtle given her stature. When once asked if she kept a diary and writes it in her own hand, she wryly responded, “Oh yes, I can’t write any other way.”

Throughout the centuries, however, British monarchs haven’t always displayed an overt sense of humor, which is a shame because there were many opportunities to lean toward the lighter side.

For instance, when Queen Elizabeth I was informed in 1588 that the Spanish armada was advancing across the channel, how delightful if she had summoned Sir Francis Drake and playfully suggested, “Drakey, board the invading fleet and hand out haggis and black puddings to the sailors, informing them they are our national dishes. They’ll turn tail and never return.” Or what about when counselors to Henry

VIII raised the issue of marital difficulties? Why didn’t the king declare, “Another divorce? There must be a quicker way.”

Then there was Charles II who didn’t have much to laugh about. Not only was the poor fellow confronted with a Dutch war, but he reigned during the Great Plague of London in 1665 and then, the following year, the Great Fire of London. “It’s not all bad news,” the king could have proclaimed. “Maybe one day they’ll name a spaniel after me.”

Queen Elizabeth II wasn’t the only member of the contemporary royal family to display a grand sense of humor. Her husband, the late Prince Phillip, was a royal wit even in his declining years. After the 2017 announcement of his pending retirement from official duties, he was approached at a function by a man who remarked “I’m sorry to hear you’re standing down.” To which the prince responded, “Well, I can’t stand up much longer.”

Fortunately, King Charles III appears to have inherited his parents’ sense of humor. During a trip to Rwanda in June, then Prince Charles found himself surrounded by bamboo trees and apparently couldn’t resist: "I feel slightly bamboozled." In his younger days, the prince even attempted to break dance, jokingly wrestled with bagpipes, briefly assumed the role of a TV

weatherman, and donned all manner of silly hats in public.

Queen Elizabeth II will be a hard act to follow. In 1986, when a rowdy protester tossed a few eggs at the queen during a trip to New Zealand, she apparently later remarked “I myself prefer my New Zealand eggs for breakfast."

Her Majesty, of course, was frequently called upon in distressing times to deliver reassuring messages to help her nation, and indeed the world, heal.

If turnabout is fair play, then the queen’s own sober words after the passing of Princess Diana should resonate with all who loved Elizabeth: “No one who knew Diana will ever forget her. Millions of others who never met her, but felt they knew her, will remember her.”

The queen’s final journey from London’s Westminster Hall to her burial site at Windsor Castle was an extraordinary event – a dignified display of British pomp and pageantry – witnessed by a million-strong crowd that turned out to collectively honor their beloved monarch.

Many of us watching the broadcast from afar shared their grief, knowing that none would formally hear the regal refrain of “God Save the Queen,” ever again.

Nick Thomas teaches at Auburn University at Montgomery in Alabama, and has written features, columns, and interviews for many newspapers and magazines. See www.getnickt.org

Cheesy Spinach and Artichoke Pinwheels

Everyone’s favorite spinach and artichoke dip in these cheesy, creamy BAKED roll ups!!! So good for GAME DAY!!!

Ingredients:

1 (14-oz) can artichoke hearts, drained and chopped

2 cups baby spinach, chopped

1 cup sour cream

1/3 cup mayonnaise

1/2 teaspoon garlic powder

1/4 teaspoon onion powder

Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper, to taste

1 cup shredded mozzarella cheese

1/4 cup freshly grated Parmesan

2 (8-ounce) tubes crescent rolls

1 large egg, beaten

2 tablespoons chopped fresh parsley leaves

Directions:

1. Preheat oven to 375 degrees F. Lightly oil a pie plate or coat with nonstick spray.

2. In a large bowl, combine artichoke hearts, spinach, sour cream, mayonnaise, garlic powder and onion powder; season with salt and pepper, to taste. Stir in mozzarella and Parmesan.

3. Unroll crescent rolls, pressing perforations to seal into approximately a 13×18-inch rectangle. Top with artichoke mixture.

4. Starting at the shortest side, roll up, pressing the edges to seal. Cut in eighths. Place, cut side down, onto the prepared pie plate. Brush with egg.

5. Place into oven and bake until golden brown, about 20-25 minutes.

6. Serve immediately, garnished with parsley, if desired.

MGM hosts inaugural Runway 5K while raising money for local charity

The Montgomery Regional Airport (MGM) has seen thousands of people a year fly in and out of its terminal, but no one has had the opportunity to run down its runway. On October 22, 2022, MGM will host its inaugural Runway 5K Walk and Run, beginning at 8:30 a.m.

The unique race is designed to highlight MGM's airport grounds and give individuals a chance to see the airport in a different light. The 3.1-mile race will highlight three of MGM's active runways, which will be closed during the runway event.

Participants can expect to see various aircrafts arriving and departing and running beside static aircraft. Due to the inaugural run, registration has been capped at 500 participants, and

individuals are encouraged to register early.

The registration cost includes:

• A medal.

• A running shirt to be worn on race day.

• An MGM water bottle.

• A clear backpack.

Children 14 and under must be accompanied by a registered adult. Free parking will be available in the MGM parking lot, and participants will be shuttled to the race site.

Additionally, MGM is partnering with River Region United Way (RRUW), a non-profit focused on community assistance, early learning, and financial stability. To raise money for RRUW, MGM will host a raffle with prizes such as a roundtrip domestic flight on either American or Delta Airlines, a Discovery Flight, and more. To register for the race and win your chance at the raffle, visit, https:// mgmairportrunway5k.itsyourrace.com/ register/.

The Montgomery Museum of Fine Arts (MMFA) is excited to announce the upcoming installation BOUNDLESS, an exhibition that epitomizes the words of 18th-century philosopher Jean-Jacques Rousseau: “The world of reality has its limits; the world of imagination is boundless.” Opening November 25, 2022, this exhibition features six artists from across the country who will transform the galleries with colossal works of art.

As part of BOUNDLESS, artist Melissa Vandenberg’s installation, Glorya, will use materials—translucent glass, florist vases— sourced from our community. Vandenberg uses ordinary materials to address and explore ideas of the fleeting nature of power, the construction of identity, and the impermanence of both tangible and abstract notions of what is important. For Glorya, Vandenberg will group 900 to 1,500 clear, glass, floral vases into large clusters within the gallery.

We need your assistance! The MMFA requires more than 1,000 transparent glass floral vases for this sculptural installation by Melissa Vandenberg as part of BOUNDLESS. Please check your cabinets, attics, and garages for vases of any size or shape you are willing to part with—after the exhibition, we will gift all the vases used in the installation to local florists. Bring your secondhand clear glass vases to the Montgomery Museum of Fine Arts located at 1 Museum Drive in Blount Cultural Park by Sunday, November 6, 2022. Please donate and be a part of this significant sculptural installation.

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By Donna Woods

I Like Bikes!

I love photography. It allows me to capture moments and images that draw my eye, have a particular meaning, or spark a memory. I'm sure some people would look at this photo of a bike and think, "Oh, a bike. Well that's nice, I guess." It's funny. I like bikes! I have a lot of pictures of bikes! Bikes make me smile. They bring forth wonderful, carefree memories. I remember my first bike. I remember the sense of freedom and accomplishment at being able to ride without training wheels. My bike was my first "horse" ...

I would put a jump rope around the handlebars, and it would become the reins of my horse. I could steer that bike wherever I wanted with that jumprope, thus launching me into a world of cowgirls and indians ... more so indians, as I favored those. My Papa was half Cherokee which I always thought was cool. He had a bronze tone to his skin, and I remember buying dark makeup to duplicate the look ....

I grew up in a small town, in the country. My bike provided hours and hours of entertainment, and sometimes escape when things weren't always great at home. I remember my brother and I building ramps out of bricks and ply board. We'd pedal really fast and jump those ramps with our bikes. We caught serious air!

Does anyone remember City of Angels, where Meg Ryan's character is riding her bike through a mountain pass. She throws back her head, and opens her arms, and feels the exhilaration of the wind, a smile on her face ... Who can't relate to that moment?! I could, and I remember closing my own eyes, and letting my own memories of such a moment take over .... Bikes allow you to be in the moment, to experience your surroundings more personally than if riding in a car ... They are empowering. Through your own efforts, you're able to transport yourself, fast or slow, whatever the impulse, and the level of output determines your speed and distance ... With a bike you can experience a moment with abandon .... choosing to ride with purpose, or take your feet off the pedals, swinging your legs in rhythm with the motion ... My bike was a "factory" ... I'd turn it upside down, and pour sand down the fenders, while turning the pedals, propelling the sand out the other end ... My bike was my savior on a few occasions when

aggressive dogs tried to nip at my heels, as they chased me on long rides on country roads during my triathlete days ... My bike was a source of adventure. It was an instrument of make-believe It was an instrument of daring behavior ... I'd ride downhill with arms open wide, or jump

obstacles. I was not so daring as my sister, though ... I remember Robin once tried standing on her banana seat, hands free, going down a hill ... It didn't turn out well. My sister was fearless ...

So, when I see a bike, I take a picture. And it doesn't matter old or new, brightly painted, or rusted with age and elements .... Each one tells me a story ... brand new? Oh the adventures its owner will have! Old and rusted? The stories it could tell ...

There is not a time when I see a bike, and immediately not want to ride .... for to me, a bike represents freedom, a journey back to my youth, a melding of me and my environment ... liberation and deliverance .... FUN!

- Donna Woods

If You’re 65

of mail

month

Are you or someone you love on Medicare? Get set, get ready! As the annual Medicare Annual Enrollment Period approaches (it starts on October 15 and runs through December 7), no doubt your mailbox will be flooded with letters, flyers and postcards from insurance companies and brokers pushing many Medicare options. But the one piece of mail you need to pay attention to is your current Medicare plan’s Annual Notice of Change, commonly referred to as ANOC. All Medicare Advantage Plans and Part D Prescription plans are required to send out this important letter before the end of September. They must tell you if your current plan is changing in any way, because if there are changes that you don't like, you have the right to change your plan during the Annual Enrollment Period. And yes, Medicare plans can change from year to year — and sometimes not for the better. What if your prescription drugs are no longer covered? Your doctor leaves the network? Your premium suddenly increases? Your co-payments jump? Protect your health and your wallet… read that ANOC letter!

Each insurance company has their own version of the ANOC letter, which may be up to 20 pages long, so grab a cup of coffee and get comfortable! Here are 6 things to look out for when reviewing your ANOC.

1. Change in plan premium. It’s likely that a plan’s premium may change from year to year. How much is dependent on what the individual carrier changes, but you could even see a plan with a $0 monthly premium change to having an

actual dollar amount for you to pay.

2. Changes in co-pays. Check to make sure your doctor co-pays, including primary and specialists in and out of network, have not changed.

3. Network changes. This will show you if your doctors and pharmacies that are no longer in your plan’s network or no longer a preferred provider.

4. Drug list changes. It’s so important that you look at this list, also called the drug formulary. Prescriptions fall in and out of coverage or change price levels, so please review to see if your drugs are still covered and if there are any new restrictions.

5. Out-of-Pocket Maximum. This is the amount of money you will pay out-of-pocket for all Medicare-covered expenses. Make sure to review this section to see if your out-of-pocket limit has changed.

6. Additional benefits in Medicare Advantage plans. For those with a Medicare Advantage plan, you may have coverage for additional benefits like dental, vision, hearing, telehealth, and more.

Caution! If you ignore the ANOC letter and you do nothing during the Annual Enrollment Period, your current plan will renew for 2023 — and you won’t be able to make any changes until October 2023. But if you review your plan’s annual notice and decide that your current plan may not be right for you in the coming year, it’s time to consider changing your plan for 2023.

According to the Kaiser Family Foundation, “For 2022, the average Medicare beneficiary has access to 39 Medicare Advantage plans, more than double the number of plans per person in 2017, and the largest number of options available in more than a decade.” That means there are more plans for you to choose from this year (great news!). Confused? Overwhelmed? Free help

just a phone call away, Medicare phone is 1-800-633-4227,

www.medicare.gov

By Lisa Iannucci

Why Did I Keep My Elementary School Report Cards?

Finally arriving at the right conclusion should be worth an 'E' (Excellent)

I just sold the home I lived in for more than 20 years. It's the longest I've lived anywhere and where I raised my three children. It took me 22 months to slowly downsize the stuff from my kids, my mom who also lived with us, as well as the lifetime of items I had held onto for all of my then-55 years. I sold so much and gave away even more. I kept what was sentimental and important to me like photos, drawings, and a few choice dollar store tchotchkes that my kids gave me at Christmas when they were little.

However, tucked in a photo album were several of my report cards. I thought I could easily toss them, but I still can't seem to do it. Why?

Now, these aren't the college transcripts that I would need if I choose to go to graduate school (not happening). These are report cards from kindergarten, first and second grade. You know the ones, where the teacher graded our early penmanship with an E for excellent or an S for satisfactory and wrote comments such as "Lisa loves learning." I'm now 57 years old. There's no logical reason to keep them, but why do I feel an emotional attachment to keeping these?

Let's state the obvious: a few pieces of paper do not take up much room anyway, so what's the big deal? I posted a picture of the report cards on Facebook and jokingly asked my friends, Time to get rid of these right? I figured I would be teased for keeping them for so long. Instead, I found a community of friends who begged me to save them. Many of them still had theirs and those who didn't wish they did.

But I kept asking myself 'why?' Why do I need to re-read that my kindergarten teacher thought I was reliable and did beautiful work, but that I was a worrier and a perfectionist? Fast forward several decades and she was right, I still am, but I could have just read that and given myself a good laugh before throwing the papers in the trash. Instead, I've read her comments multiple times since.

Reminder of an Innocent Time

Some of my friends who encouraged me to keep them actually have their parents' report cards, too. One has her dad's report cards and never knew her grandparents, so seeing their signatures was poignant.

Another friend said that the report cards reminded her of a more innocent time. I can see that. It was a time when someone else paid the bills and made me dinner while my life revolved around homework and friends. My childhood wasn't the easiest: my father died when I was six and my mom raised my three older brothers and me on a single salary. But the pressure was on her, not me. I went to school, played Barbies, read books, and dreamed of what my future would be. Innocent. "It would be interesting to see what you were like as a kid," my daughter Samantha said.

One friend asked if my family would want

them when I was gone. I never thought of that. When they packed up to move out, I urged my kids to keep their own report cards to look back on and told them they would regret not having them when they were older. Yet I was questioning the same for myself. So, I decided to ask my now adult children if they wanted to look at them.

I was surprised to hear that they did. "It would be interesting to see what you were like as a kid," my daughter Samantha said. "We can compare them to us." I've shared stories about me and school before, but never showed them the report cards. I was glad I didn't toss them.

My 86-year-old mother passed away in April. Now, after talking to my kids, I realized I never saw my mom's report cards, either. She said that she liked school, but that's all I knew. Now I was wishing I could have seen hers.

I was advised to just take a photo of them and then toss them, but like the smell and feel of an old book, there's something about holding the originals that tugs at my heartstrings.

So, at this point, I knew that I wanted to keep them — mostly for my kids to see — but I still didn't understand why I wanted them. Once they looked at them and laughed at the truism of Mom being called a perfectionist, that would be it. The novelty was over, and I would be back to wondering if I should toss them.

The Reason Came Down to Dreams

Am I going to write my autobiography and use the info in that? Maybe. I was a young widow who raised three children and I am a two-time cancer survivor. I think my story is interesting, but I'm not sure

my readers would care that I excelled in spelling or that math wasn't my favorite subject.

She said that '"it was a time that you made your mom proud." Yes, one of the report cards allowed room for parent comments and Mom wrote, "We are very proud of this report card." It's nice to read, but I still don't think it's the reason I want to keep them. Whether or not I should keep these has taken up more space in my head than other bigger items, but the question of why has truly fascinated me.

Finally, I decided to sit with the report cards and think back to those times — what I could remember at this point anyway. I smiled because it really came down to dreams.

What do you want to be when you grow up, Lisa? I was asked that so much when I was in kindergarten, first and second grade. I said that I wanted to be a stewardess or a doctor, but at my young age, I already knew I wanted to write. For television. For movies. For books. Poems, songs and anything I could. If I close my eyes, I could see little me discovering that passion for reading and writing. I also wanted to travel the world and write about what I saw.

Every time I think of that time in my life, I realize that I've accomplished a lot since then, but that I still have more I want to do. I might be in my late 50s, but that young girl with dreams and passions is still very much alive. And those report cards transport me back to the time in my life when I was learning all about the world.

The report cards are no longer stored in the photo album. Instead, they are now prominently displayed on my desk as a means of inspiring me to keep chasing more dreams.

Lisa Iannucci is the founder of The Virgin Traveler, a travel blog for those who are finally getting a chance to travel later in life. She is the host of the Reel Travels podcast and The Write Start podcast. She is the author of "The Film/ TV Lover’s Travel Guide" and "Road Trip: A Sports Lover's Travel Guide."

Prattville Happenings

Carve out some fun at the 4th Annual Parade of Pumpkins!

Join us for the 4th Annual Parade of Pumpkins in Historic Downtown Prattville from October 21st-October 31st. Festive storefronts, seasonal displays, decorated pumpkins from citizens, and food trucks will transform Historic Downtown. We are excited to announce the new addition of the Pumpkin Barrel Trail and the expansion of the GLOW Trail. This family-friendly event is free and open for all to participate. Grab a pumpkin, get in the spirit, and share your creativity at the Parade of Pumpkins!

To participate:

1. Carve, decorate, or paint your pumpkin.

2. Bring your pumpkin to Historic Downtown Prattville.

3. Place it on display along the parade

or leave in a designated Pumpkin Dropoff area beginning October 20th.

4. The City has lights set for your pumpkin each night. (Candles are prohibited.)

5. Enter your pumpkin in the “Best Pumpkin” Contest for a chance to win $100 in cash sponsored by Julianne Hansen Fine Art & Pottery and more!

One of the best features during the Parade of Pumpkins is the festive

downtown merchant storefronts. Each participating location will be featured in a "Best Storefront Contest" on the City of Prattville's Facebook page, and voting will begin October 25th. While you enjoy the pumpkins, displays, and creativity, please make sure you select which Downtown Merchant storefront is your favorite by voting on the City of Prattville Facebook.

During the Parade of Pumpkins, we are partnering with AICC to host a food drive. Drop-off locations for non-perishable items and toiletries are inside the front entrance of City Hall.

For more information, visit www. prattvilleal.gov, the City of Prattville social media accounts, or email paradeofpumpkins@prattvilleal.gov

Save the Date for the Dinner in the District

the Autauga County Heritage Association. This event isn’t your average dinner party! Come enjoy a unique celebration seated on the bank of Autauga Creek overlooking the historic Daniel Pratt Gin Factory. The open-air celebration kicks off with a cocktail hour followed by a multi-course meal inspired by Daniel Pratt’s famed community dinners. tickets can be purchased at www.prattvillechamber.com

Save the date to join us on November 3 for Dinner in the District featuring live music, outstanding food and community fellowship – all in the heart of Historic Downtown Prattville. Tickets go on sale October 3 at 10:00 A.M. Additional details will be provided soon on Facebook. This event is presented in partnership by the Prattville Area Chamber of Commerce, City of Prattville and Southern Bite. Proceeds will benefit

UPCOMING SENIOR TRIP: Christmas in Nashville

Come join us as we head to the winter wonderland of Nashville! Parks and Recreation Department is planning a senior trip on December 14-16, 2022, to the Gaylord Opryland Resort, an Oak Ridge Boys Dinner Show, admission

to "ICE" (a walk-through ice sculpture display), admission to Cheekwood, a Nashville City Tour, flat bottom boat ride, transportation, and more! For more information, please call the Gillespie Senior Center at 334-595-0840 Cost: $600 per person for the traditional view, $700 per person for an Atrium view. (Price based on double occupancy.)

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By Liz Weston

How to Cultivate a Happier Retirement

Researchers have identified several factors besides money that contribute to a happier retirement, including good health, strong relationships, and a sense of purpose.

But setbacks are inevitable, in life and in retirement. Not everyone enjoys good health—and no one enjoys it forever. Loved ones die or move away. The pursuits you thought would give your life meaning may not, or may not be possible: Think of all the activities and plans canceled because of the pandemic.

Yet many retirees continue to be happy despite difficulties, and research indicates that their psychological attitudes help determine how well they cope with change.

“Mindset is key, and it’s one of those things that’s within our control,” says executive and retirement coach Joe Casey, author of “Win the Retirement Game: How to Outsmart the 9 Forces Trying to Steal Your Joy.”

Cultivate Optimism

A 2014 study by two Kansas State University researchers found that people who are more optimistic tend to be more satisfied in retirement. Study participants’ levels of optimism were measured by their agreement with statements including “In uncertain times, I usually expect the best” and “Overall I expect more good things to happen to me than bad.”

Positive emotions such as optimism help people to be more resilient and to

think more creatively, while pessimism can make it harder to take productive action or cope with difficult situations, says the study’s lead researcher Sarah Asebedo, now a professor at Texas Tech University’s School of Financial Planning.

But don’t despair, pessimists: You can learn to be more optimistic.

“I do think certain people might have a disposition toward optimism or pessimism, but that doesn’t mean you

explains. “It’s really more the ‘OK, let’s look for the good.’”

Cultivate a Positive View of Aging

While positive thinking in general can help you cope with life, positive thinking about aging may actually extend your life.

A 2002 study led by Yale University professor Becca R. Levy found that people who had more positive views of aging lived a median of 7.5 years longer than those with more negative attitudes. The gap persisted even after the researchers took into account other factors that affect longevity, such as age, gender, socioeconomic status, health and loneliness.

can’t change your outlook and change your way of viewing a situation,” says Asebedo, who also edits the Journal of Financial Therapy.

Asebedo recommends psychologist Martin E.P. Seligman ’s book, “Learned Optimism: How to Change Your Mind and Your Life,” which explains cognitive behavioral techniques to combat pessimism. If you need further or ongoing help, consider talking with a therapist about developing a more optimistic outlook.

“It’s not the Pollyannaish view,” Casey

Researchers examined how study participants’ views of aging predicted their survival up to 23 years later. The 338 men and 322 women ages 50 and older had responded to several statements about aging, including “As you get older, you are less useful” and “I am as happy now as I was when I was younger. ”

Positive views of aging had a greater impact on life span than many health factors. For example, low blood pressure or low cholesterol each contribute about four years of longevity. Other healthy behaviors, including refraining from smoking, maintaining a healthy weight and getting regular exercise, add one to three years to life spans.

Levy’s research also has found that positive views of aging can protect

against dementia and help people recover from health setbacks.

People can change their views by becoming more aware of, and challenging, negative stereotypes of aging, Levy writes in her book “Breaking the Age Code: How Your Beliefs About Aging Determine How Long and Well You Live.” She also recommends making intergenerational friendships to combat ageism and looking for positive role models.

Cultivate a Growth Mindset

Casey says people can struggle in retirement if they believe that they have stopped evolving and that their days of learning new things are behind them. He coaches his clients to develop a “growth mindset” that embraces learning and change.

He points to research by Stanford University psychology professor Carol Dweck, author of “Mindset: The New Psychology of Success.” Dweck found that people who believe their intelligence and talents can be improved—what she calls the growth mindset—tend to be more successful in life than those who believe their abilities are innate—what she terms a fixed mindset.

Casey encourages clients not just to learn, but to challenge themselves. That may mean learning something that takes effort, or mastering a skill.

“Mastery gives you a sense of control and gives you a sense of achievement, which often people miss when they leave the more professional workplace,” Casey says.

But mastery also requires another aspect of a growth mindset: being willing to risk, accept and learn from failure. That can be hard for people who are good at their jobs, Casey says.

“They’re not used to being bad at anything,” he says. “To get good at something, to master something, you have to be bad at it first.”

By Liz Weston of NerdWallet

Can You Afford to Retire?

The answer may be more complicated than you think, and an incorrect answer could be costly

Can you afford to retire? The pandemic has pushed many people to confront this question earlier than they may have planned. The answer may be more complicated than you think, and an incorrect answer could be costly. To correctly answer the question, it may help to build a retirement income and expenses pyramid.

Longevity risk is one reason that the answer is complicated. Many people retiring today live twenty-five years or longer after they retire; think of that as being unemployed for 25 years. In addition, that twenty-five-year period of time is filled with three different phases with different sets of expenses: the Go-Go years, the Slow-Go years, and the No-Go years. Another complication is that your lifestyle when you retire may be totally different, with a different set of expenses; it’s a whole new budget. Finally, your sources of income are likely to be different and subject to new sets of risks.

On Wednesday, October 26th from noon to 1:30 p.m. Susan Moore of Moore Wealth Management, Inc. will be conducting a complimentary webinar that covers how to build your pyramid, estimating what your income and expenses will be during retirement. There will be both a live and recorded version. Please call the Moore Wealth Management office for further information or reservations at 334.209.1612 or email sarah@ moorewealthmanagement.com. If you miss the webinar, we also offer free consultations that are without obligation.

A pyramid approach attempts to prioritize the sources of income and expenses. First, you build the foundation of the pyramid with your guaranteed sources of income which include Social Security, some types of annuities and pensions. This involves a whole set of

Financial Thoughts with Susan Moore

is subject to different risks than one in which you are accumulating assets. Conventional wisdom was that a safe withdrawal rate from a portfolio was 4%; new studies show that in a low interest rate world the “new” safe withdrawal rate is 2.5% to 3%. ¹ In addition, a portfolio producing an income is subject to greater risks of sustained losses than a portfolio providing no distributions.

By Susan Clayton Moore, J.D. Principal of Moore Wealth Management, Inc.

questions: when to take Social Security to maximize it for your circumstances; when and how to take income from the annuities; and which pension option to take and is your pension safe (is it at risk because of underfunding)?

Once you’ve determined the guaranteed sources of income that make up the foundation, then you must budget and figure out your essential expenses, which include food, housing, healthcare and taxes. These expenses may vary widely in the three phases of Go-Go, Slow-Go and No-Go. This too involves a whole set of questions: how to maximize your healthcare coverage and minimize your costs; can you afford to age in place or do you need to plan to downsize into independent or assisted living options; and how to minimize taxes on Social Security and avoid higher Medicare premiums.

Then you build the middle level of the pyramid which includes your variable sources of income from savings and investment portfolios and your desired expenses like vacations, hobbies, entertainment and taking care of family. Like the essential expenses, these may vary widely depending up on the three phases. A portfolio producing an income

Finally, you are ready to build the top of the pyramid which include your legacy plans: helping to fund grandchildren’s education, gifts to family while you’re alive and at your death; and philanthropic giving while you’re alive and at your death. These should be funded with your longer-term holdings or illiquid investments.

Retiring is complicated. The old adage applies: if you fail to plan, you plan to fail. Build your pyramid!

Susan Clayton Moore, J.D., is a financial advisor and wealth manager of Moore Wealth Management, Inc., with offices in Auburn, Montgomery, and Alexander City, AL. Susan has under advisement assets over $170 million (as of 1.21.2022) in brokerage and advisory assets through Kestra Financial and has been a financial planner for over 38 years. Contact Susan at 334.209.1612. Email contact is

The opinions expressed in this commentary are those of the author and may not necessarily reflect those held by Kestra Investment Services, LLC or Kestra Advisory Services, LLC. This is for general information only and is not intended to provide specific investment advice or recommendations for any individual. It is suggested that you consult your financial professional, attorney or tax advisor with regard to your individual situation.

Securities offered through Kestra Investment Services, LLC (Kestra IS), member FINRA/SIPC. Investment Advisory Services offered through Kestra Advisory Services, LLC (Kestra AS), an affiliate of Kestra IS. Kestra IS or Kestra AS are not affiliated with Moore Wealth Management, Inc. https://bit.ly/KF-Disclosures

https://www.onefpa.org/journal/Pages/The%204%20Percent%20Rule%20

Why Intelligent Aging

Should Be Healthcare’s Moonshot

“It’s not how old you are, it’s how you are old.” –Jules Renard, French author.

It was the summer of 1965 when Medicare was signed into law, guaranteeing that the federal government would manage the provision and cost of medical care for all seniors. In doing so, President Lyndon Johnson proudly declared: “No longer will older Americans be denied the healing miracle of modern medicine. No longer will illness crush and destroy the savings that they have so carefully put away over a lifetime.”

As the country’s then 19 million seniors celebrated, little note was taken of the nearly 70 million children who were part of a generation that would come to be known as the “baby boomers.” A nation of people once very young is today growing older by the minute. In fact, every day, about 10,000 baby boomers turn 65.

In 2019, Medicare covered about 63 million beneficiaries. This is expected to swell to over 80 million beneficiaries by 2030. As this tectonic demographic shift happens, there is another essential fact to consider: On average, those 65 and older consume five times more health resources than those under 65.

Caring for aging boomers will likely stress the economic well-being of the workingage population. The number of tax-paying workers per Medicare beneficiary fell from 4.6 during the program’s early years to 3.1 in 2015 and the trend downward continues: This number is expected to be 2.3 by 2030.

The hypergrowth of Medicare beneficiaries multiplied by a five-times consumption

factor is problematic. Add medical inflation, an expected staffing shortfall and a decreasing number of workers to pay for it and you can grasp the magnitude of the problem.

Changing Outcomes By Changing The Model

A paradigm shift is needed to better manage older citizens’ needs and curb rising costs. Leveraging the use of artificial intelligence (AI), digital tools and other smart technologies across the spectrum of care settings can help change healthcare approaches from being reactive to proactive.

When it comes to the health and well-being of older people, a big part of what needs to be done is preventing and better managing chronic conditions that can be proactively monitored and better managed with intelligent lifestyle and community-based services.

Intelligent Aging Opportunities

Telehealth visits among Medicare beneficiaries increased 63-fold during the pandemic. Equally important, 95% of Medicare beneficiaries were satisfied with their telehealth experience. Here are other examples of how intelligent technologies could support older consumers:

Ambient Intelligence: Continuous “anywhere” monitoring could provide new and ongoing opportunities to assess and manage the health and wellness of older citizens. Whether through wearables, sensing devices in the home or embedded in things we have regular contact with like

car seats and mattresses, smart devices can gather data that is analyzed by healthcare professionals and presented back to the consumer.

Intelligent Virtual Assistants: These can be used between human visits to help keep people healthy by making assessments and providing individuals with ongoing and real-time intelligent advice. Manually managing and recording daily activities such as nutrition and fitness has always been tedious and difficult. AI virtual assistants can automate the acquisition of deep knowledge of an individual’s diet, exercise, medications and emotional state.

Artificial Intelligence: AI can help reduce social isolation for many older Americans and create new healthy connections between friends, family members and the community. AI chatbots at home help people stay on top of things like taking medications, reminding them of doctors’ appointments and even scheduling transportation.

As we consider the health, medical and economic challenges of serving this important population, let’s start first by acknowledging and celebrating our successes. Things like public health and medical breakthroughs are allowing more people to live longer than at any point in history. As we celebrate this accomplishment, let us recognize that this success creates new challenges that the existing healthcare system was never designed to address.

Creating a new approach starts with moving away from our traditional views and beliefs regarding aging. Nowhere will this be more important than how we leverage technology to improve the provision of services to manage the health and wellbeing of older citizens.

Tom Lawry is the National Director for Artificial Intelligence, Health and Life Sciences at Microsoft.

Source: www.Forbestechcouncil.com

BREAST CANCER AWARENESS MONTH

Walk of Life is Back, October 15th, Get Involved!

Our Walk of Life for breast cancer is back! Join the fun! No matter if you’re a walker, a runner or just someone who wants to enjoy getting outside and helping others in the process, our Walk of Life has something for you! Plus, it’s exciting to see thousands of people take to the streets of downtown Montgomery to show their support for those dealing with breast cancer! Your participation provides mammograms + breast screening services to women and men in every county of Alabama. EARLY DETECTION IS SAVING LIVES — thanks to you! Registration is open, so head over to www.joytolife.org and sign up as a runner, walker, volunteer or team today! Join us October 15th for family fun for everyone—including a 5K run/walk, Kids Zone, food trucks, games, music and much more! Register online at www.joytolife. org today as an individual, team, volunteer or survivor! Remember—the registration fee gets you to the start line, but your fundraising helps us get to the finish line in the fight against breast cancer! The Walk of Life, October 15th. Register today at www.joytolife.org

EARLY DETECTION IS SAVING LIVES — thanks to you!

Men Wearing Pink-Shaaban Temple No.103 Supports Breast Cancer Awareness!

The Nobles of Shaaban Temple No.103 decided to show their support for all women and men affected with breast cancer, and pay their respects to those who have passed away from breast cancer by teaming up with The Real Men Wear Pink Campaign here in Montgomery, Alabama. Shaaban Temple came up with a unique way to give back to the American Cancer Society by putting together a breast cancer photo-shoot involving The Nobles of Shaaban Temple No. 103, and The Montgomery County Sheriff's Department. The Nobles designed an all-white walking shirt with pink letters on the back that reads, "REAL NOBLES WEAR PINK." It's time for us Nobles to come together and support our survivors and sisters and bring more awareness to our black community on how severe this disease is, stated Noble Brian "Blue" Smith. It's time for us as men, as Nobles, as brothers to stand behind our brothers and sisters and support them during this fight, stated Illustrious Potentate Kofee Anderson. Hopefully this campaign will put a spark in the nobility not only in the Desert of Alabama, but across the Domain to support our breast cancer fighters not only just for the month of October but year round.

Beat the Odds Casino Night

The Beat the Odds Casino Night and Drawdown Event is a exciting party with a casino night theme, a drawdown for a chance to win $10,000, and a BIG 5 auction. The event features real casino tables, complete with dealers for blackjack and other card games, as well as a craps table, roulette wheel, and even slot machines. Guests will enjoy live music and a wonderful buffet. There are fantastic prizes at the end of the evening such as a pair of Iron Bowl tickets, a YETI Cooler, a weekend getaway and a $250 Amazon Gift Card. The owner of the winning drawdown ticket will go home with $10,000, which makes for an exciting conclusion to the evening. There will be a wine pull and a bourbon raffle. Enjoy an evening with us as we raise money to help local cancer patients in Central Alabama “Beat the Odds!” Date: Thursday October 20, 2022, Time: 6 P.M to 9 P.M., Venue: Wynlakes Country Club. Call the Cancer Wellness Foundation for more information 334.273.2279

Illustrious Potentate Kofee Anderson

L-R, Noble Brian"Blue"Smith, Noble Curtis Graves, Noble Micheal Rucker, Noble Sean Macon, Noble Falando Jenkins, Illustrious Potentate Kofee Anderson, Noble Kelvin Alexander, Noble Marcus Ector, Noble brian McConico

L-R, Noble Brian"Blue"Smith, Noble Curtis Graves, Noble Micheal Rucker, Noble Sean Macon, Noble Falando Jenkins, Illustrious Potentate Kofee Anderson, Real Men Wear Pink Representative Lexie Larson, Noble Kelvin Alexander, Noble Marcus Ector, Noble Brian McConico

Attracting Lady Bugs to Your Garden

Lady Bugs are the good kind of bug you want in your garden. They are a gardener’s friend that provides organic and natural pest control free of charge.

If you are already spotting them on your plants, then your garden is more pest free than most. A ladybug is not only lovely to spot moving along on your blooms but super helpful in eating aphids. A ton of them. They eat other bag bugs too, but aphids are the pests most gardeners know about and want to get rid of.

Although, you can buy ladybugs, you don’t need to because if you provide the right conditions for the ladybugs they will show up on their own. The thing is if you just buy the ladybugs, they won’t stay without food, shelter and water. In the end you are better off planting a few plants that draw them to your garden. By providing what a ladybug what they need they will come and hang out in your garden helping you keep pests away.

This past fall I planted a patch of Bachelor Buttons and before spring came, I noticed a wave of ladybugs hanging out. Now as spring is here, I notice the

ladybugs still in the patch of Buttons but also substantially more ladybugs in the vegetable patch, and on my climbing roses.

Ladybugs are abundant!! If you too want them to come, consider adding a few of these plants to your garden space. The goal is to get the ladybugs into the garden before you have trouble. So be thinking of how you can fall plant and direct seed when mentioned. Or get these out in the garden as soon as

the temps are warm enough.

Bachelor Buttons - fall plant from seed for best results with this one Coneflower

Sunflowers – fun to start from seed Nasturtium

Chives

Tomato

The added benefit of attracting the ladybug to the garden is you’ll also be setting the stage for other helpful insects like bees, wasps, and butterflies to show up and work in your garden. You’ll attract more birds to your yard space, and they eat bad bugs too. These are the garden helpers we all need and want. A word of caution is a ladybug larvae look like bad bugs so make sure to look up ladybug larvae pictures before you start squishing bugs you are not sure of.

Putting in a shallow birdbath with a few stacked pebbles in the water for the insects provides the water they need. The pebbles are so the insects, such as ladybugs, have a landing spot.

Christie Boucher, an intern in the Master Gardener 2022 Master Gardener Class. For more information on becoming a master gardener, visit www. capcitymga.org or email capcitymga@gmail.com

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Fall Activities Are Still Available at AUM OLLI

Even though classes for the Fall 2022 term began on September 19, 2022, there are still bonus opportunities and lunch presentations available for registration.

The bonus opportunities include two book discussion groups: one that meets once a month (the second Tuesday of the month at 2:00 p.m.) at the Selma – Dallas County Public Library and one that meets at the Center for Lifelong Learning (75 TechnaCenter Drive) twice a month (the first and third Tuesdays at 10:00 a.m.).

In addition to book discussion groups, four authors will appear in person at the Center for Lifelong Learning on the Tuesdays (listed below) from 8:30 – 9:45 a.m. to talk about their books:

October 04 – Tim Lockette

October 18 – Maire Martello

November 01 – John Dersham

November 15 – Wayne Flynt

The books will also be for sale and available for signing so you can leave with unique holiday gifts.

Another bonus opportunity during the Fall 2022 term is an archeological and ecological walk through the 250-acre wooded area of the AUM campus, led by AUM faculty members. This event is scheduled for Friday, October 21, from 1:00 – 3:00 p.m. The tour will include an introduction to the plants and animals that occupy the area and an overview of the land’s recent history, focusing on the families that lived and worked on it during the 20th century.

AUM OLLI is once again hosting a potluck lunch – scheduled for November 3 at 11:00 a.m. Bring a dish, and visit with AUM OLLI members and instructors in an informal setting. As we have discovered at past potlucks, some OLLI members are amazing cooks!

The one field trip that AUM OLLI is hosting during Fall 2022 is already full, but it will be offered again in future terms: a wine and food tasting at Peppertree Steaks and Wines. Past participants continue to rave about what they learned about wine and the delicious food served to those who attended.

The bonus opportunities and lunch presentations are included in the OLLI membership fee of $40.00 per year. In addition to joining, AUM OLLI members need to register for each session they wish to attend. Visit www.aum.edu/OLLI to register or call 334-344-3804

Red River Meeting House

(If) my people who are called by My name humble themselves and pray, and seek My face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, will forgive their sin, and will heal their land. 2nd Chronicles 7:14: (NAS).

Two “great awakenings” have impacted American history. One occurred about thirty years before the American Revolution, setting the stage for the “Black Robe Regiment” of preachers who led American colonists in the fight against British tyranny.

The second broke out on the American frontier around 1800 during a period of lawlessness and debauchery. Concerned that westward expansion minus the moderating Word of God would lead to America’s demise, Christian evangelists migrated to Southern Kentucky / Northern Tennessee and boldly proclaimed the Gospel. It was during revival meetings at the Red River Meeting House near Adairville, Kentucky north of

Nashville that flames of the 2nd Great Awakening were ignited.

As I believe America is in the grip of a satanic cabal and only God can save us from our sad state of lawlessness, delusion and depravity; I decided to go kneel upon the hallowed ground of the Red River Meeting House, as did those who came before us, and pray that America will once again turn back to God.

Cindy and I stopped in Nashville and spent the night at the beautiful, historic Union Station Nashville Yards Marriott Hotel. Next morning, we eased north to Springfield, Tennessee, strolled in the town square and talked with nice folks. Lunch found us at the Public Place Bar and Grill. Packed with locals. Always a good sign. Great burgers and banana pudding, too.

Adairville, Kentucky is a quick drive north of Springfield through stunning fields of grain, corn, tobacco, and what looks like sugar cane. We crossed the

Red River along the way. It’s more a scenic creek here. But originates as a Cumberland River tributary upon which Union boats approached Clarksville, Tennessee during the Civil War.

The meeting house is a right turn off Highway 431, then about two miles down Route 663 through a farming community. A left on a gravel road culminates at the Red River Cemetery and Red River Meeting House. Gravestones in the cemetery tell the remarkable story of the people who populated this former frontier, arriving through Philadelphia and Charleston via Virginia and the Carolina’s. Soldiers who fought America’s earliest wars are buried here. A tombstone is inscribed with the 23rd Psalm … in Gaelic. And there’s even the grave of a veteran of Waterloo!

When revival broke out on the frontier, families travelled in covered wagons from great distances and camped for five days to hear preachers with

Historic Marker

Pulpit Red River Meeting House

Red River Meeting House

names like McGready, McGee and Hodge. Presbyterians, Methodists and Baptists worked together “against the frontier’s increasing wickedness” and for men’s souls; and to turn the young nation back to the God of the Bible. Thus, this sanctified place represents significant American history, a marker for a great turn from lawlessness and shame to law and order and Biblical truth. It’s a serene spot where one senses the presence of the Almighty. We certainly did.

On the way home, we stopped in Adairville and visited with Terri Clinard Holliday who owns the Grapevine Antique Store wherein I purchased an interesting book by Glenda Orme Clark titled: “A Table in the Frontier: Pioneers, Protestants & the Presence of God.” Chronicled in that book, are “amazing events and astonishing first-hand accounts of the Second Great Awakening in Kentucky and Tennessee.”

I’ve learned something astonishing: Frontier believers in the early 1800’s claimed that God had revealed to them the coming of a Third Great Awakening sometime after the year 2000. Clark writes, “… God assured them that another great outpouring would come, and that this time it would be world-wide ... it would be followed by a time worse than anything America had ever experienced. Some of these people had, only a few years before, experienced an Indian war. They said that what would come would make that warfare and those times seem pale by comparison. The horrible times that would follow would come as a judgement on the church of America, for though many would repent and be converted in that awakening, the church as a whole would not change, and the church of

that time (today) would be in great need of repentance. Their sins would be complacency, conformity to the world system, love of money and material things, and a seeking after such things, rather than seeking after God ... In becoming like the world system, Christians of that day would assure themselves that they were pleasing to God, though they would actually be far from pleasing Him.”

Will people turn back to God? Or will the great “apostasy” (falling away from the faith) precede the Lord’s soon return? The Apostle Paul wrote: Let no one in any way deceive you, for it (the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ, and our gathering together to Him) will not come unless the apostasy comes first, and the man of lawlessness is revealed, the son of destruction … 2nd Thessalonians 2:2-3 (NAS).

I don’t know the answer to these questions. But either way, I’m looking up!

In case you’re interested, the next Annual Primitive Camp Meeting and Rendezvous will be held at the Red River Meeting House October 14-16, 2022. www.unionstationhotelnashville.com www.publichousetn.com www.rrmh.org

The Grapevine-Facebook

Jeff S. Barganier is a novelist, travel writer and manager of Cindy Barganier Interiors LLC (www.cindybarganier. com). He travels far and wide upon the slightest excuse for something interesting to write about. Contact: Jeffbarganier@knology.net. Instagram: @jeffbarganier. You may print out Jeff’s features at www.jeffbarganier.com

Grave Site at Red River Cemetery

Shop Owner Terri and Cindy

This & tHAT i

Brunch for Widows @ Frazer

Join us for a morning of laughter, encouragement, and testimony with great food. Our speaker for this event is Dr. John Ed Mathison. Music will be provided by Alyssa Taylor. Oct 15, 2022 from 11:30 AM–1:00 PM. The free event will be held in the Activity Center, Room 8114. Please register using the QR code or contact Donna below so we know you're coming. Contact Donna Hendrick with any questions, dhendrick@frazer.church, phone, 334-495-6391.

Alabama Radio Moments

The Alabama Department of Archives and History (ADAH) has a new temporary exhibit, Alabama Radio Moments, at the Museum of Alabama to highlight the history and technology of radio. The new exhibit explores ways in which radio influenced the lives of Alabamians in the twentieth century--how they learned about current events, enjoyed sports and music, and connected with the world beyond their local community. Featuring items from the launch of Alabama’s first public radio station through the beginning of the age of television and into the 1970s, the exhibit will highlight Alabamians’ contributions to radio technology and programming the importance of radio to the social and political climate of the era. Curated and designed by ADAH staff, the exhibit is presented in partnership with the Birmingham-based Alabama Historical Radio Society (AHRS) and features a number of artifacts from the group, as well as Huntsville collector Marc Bendickson and Tuscumbia radio station WZZA. Alabama Radio Moments will be on view through May 2023. Admission to the opening events and to the Museum of Alabama are free. The Alabama Department of Archives and History is the state’s government-records repository, a special-collections library and research facility, and home to the Museum of Alabama, the state history museum. It is located in downtown Montgomery, directly across Washington Avenue from the State Capitol. The Museum of Alabama is open Monday through Saturday from 8:30 to 4:30. The EBSCO Research Room is open Tuesday through Saturday from 8:30 to 4:30. To learn more, visit www.archives.alabama.gov or call (334) 242-4364.

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BOOM! starts conversations and shares stories. Share your business with BOOM! readers. For more information call/text 334.324.3472 or visit www.riverregionboom.com

Oktoberfest Common Bond Brewers

It's that time of year again! Come to Common Bond Brewers for Oktoberfest. Saturday, October 8, 2022, 12:00 PM 10:00 PM, Common Bond Brewers 424 Bibb Street, Suite #150 Downtown Montgomery. It's that time of year again! Come to Common Bond Brewers for Oktoberfest. We've got all your favorite Oktoberfest beers and some special releases for the occasion. And, of course, we'll have plenty of food to keep you fueled up for a night of revelry. So raise a glass and join us in celebrating the best time of year! Featured Food-German Food Truck - Bibb Street PizzaFlammkuchen (German Pizza) Featured Beverages-Wulfenbrau Fest Bier, R&D Small Batch, 20oz Limited Edition Bier Steins For Sale!

Caregiver of the Month Spotlight: Dorothy Darrington

Dorothy has been with Home Care Assistance since January of 2020! During that time Dorothy has worked with several clients and has received rave reviews from them all. In recent months Dorothy has proven to be reliable, compassionate, and dedicated to the job. Dorothy has a smile and a personality that will light up the room.

“Caregiving is a series of small acts of care that alter the course of someone’s life.” -thecaregiverspace.org

We appreciate your hard work and dedication, thank you for a Job Well Done!!

For more information visit www.homecareassistancemontgomery.com

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Fall Foliage Prediction Map

The 2022 Fall Foliage Map is the ultimate visual planning guide to the annual progressive changing of the leaves. While no tool can be 100% accurate, this tool is meant to help travelers better time their trips to have the best opportunity of catching peak color each year. Why do leaves fall? The beauty of nature is sometimes found in the profound ‘intelligence’ it exudes. Perennials, which includes trees, must protect themselves in order to get through the harsh, freezing temperatures of winter. If trees did not shed their leaves, their soft vegetation would certainly freeze during winter time, damaging and, no doubt, killing the tree. In order to cope with the grueling winter temperatures, trees slowly close off the veins that carry water and nutrients to and from the leaves with a layer of new cells that form at the base of the leaf stem, protecting the limbs and body of the tree. Once the process of new cell creation is complete, water and nutrients no longer flow to and fro from the leaf - this enables the leaf to die and weaken at the stem, eventually falling gracefully to the ground.

Alabama Dance Theatre's ballet, Dracula, is a tale of twists and turns true to the original novel. In the blink of an eye, you are taken from London, England to a chilling castle in Transylvania. The ballet opens with Renfields arrival and ultimate descent into madness in Dracula's Castle with his three brides. Far away in London there is a tearful goodbye between Jonathan Harker and his fiancé, Mina Murray. Business has Jonathan traveling to the far reaches of Transylvania to meet a mysterious client inside a remote crumbling estate. En route to the castle he passes a Romani village and receives an ominous warning about what fate awaits Jonathan should he go there. Ignoring the warning, he journeys on to the castle. Upon arrival he soon discovers that he has walked into a nightmare and has become a prisoner in Dracula's Castle. The story does not end here, but intrigue and surprises are better left unsaid. Dracula is full of beauty and magic even in its darkest moments. Witness the drama and horror that is sure to unfold in Dracula, a perfect treat for Halloween weekend. The Alabama Dance Theatre presents a full length story ballet based on Bram Stoker's novel. ADT Company dancers, guest artists, and members of the community will perform on four dates: Friday, October 28th at 7pm, Saturday, October 29 at 2pm and 7pm, Sunday, October 30th at 2pm. Not recommended for children under 7 years old. Troy University's Davis Theatre, 251 Montgomery Street, Downtown Montgomery. More info visit www.alabamadancetheatre.com

The Alabama Dance Theatre Presents Dracula

Make a Difference Day is October 22

Since 1992, Make a Difference Day has been recognized every fourth Saturday of October as a national holiday dedicated to volunteering.

Today, Make a Difference Day is one of the largest national days of community service in the country and is a celebration of neighbors helping neighbors. This year, HandsOn encourages you to join us on Saturday, October 22 and build a better community for us all to enjoy!

Among the many projects taking place on that Saturday are:

• A Food Distribution with New Hope Worship Center

• The Glassner Autumn Challenge with Montgomery Bicycle Club

• Cat Care with PAWS of Alabama

There are nearly 100 other options available on October 22 (and every other date) for you to consider! To review our volunteer calendar, visit http://volunteer.handsonriverregion.org/calendar and help make a REAL difference in the River Region.

A GriefShare Support Group -- Your Journey from Mourning to Joy -- will meet every Wednesday through Nov. 30 from 10 AM until noon. All meetings will be in the East Sanctuary. This is a free group with discussion concerning stages of grief, the storms that accompany it, and ways of dealing with loss. Sorry, childcare is not available during this time.

Capital City Master Gardeners Association Lunch & Learn @ Montgomery Cultural Arts Center

Capital City Master Gardener Association presents Lunch & Learn, the 1st Wednesday of Every Month from 12-1 pm. They will meet at Montgomery Cultural Arts Center (Armory Learning Arts Building), 1018 Madison Ave., Montgomery 36104. Mark your calendars, October 5, “Planting Bulbs & Tubers for Next Year’s Bloomers” Karen Weber, Horticulturist and Master Gardener, will present a program on “Planting Bulbs & Tubers for Next Year’s Bloomers”. Come join us to learn about bulbs to plant for brilliant color next year. Discover the best varieties and how to care for each. Should you plant tulips and irises in this area? Do these plants return each year? Let’s find out! November 2, “Garden Tools and Equipment” Mike Forster, Master Gardener, will present a program on “Garden Tools and Equipment”. How do you sharpen garden tools for next year? What are different types of shovels and how are they used? Is annual maintenance needed for my yard equipment? Mike will have answers in this hands-on presentation.

December 7, “Holiday Decorating in the South” Anne Carr and Linda Cater, Master Gardeners, will present a program on “Holiday Decorating in the South”. Watch as these ladies take ordinary items from the back yard and create lovely seasonal decorations for inside and outside your home. Come early for a good seat. BRING A SACK LUNCH, FREE PROGRAM, WATER PROVIDED, For information, please contact the Montgomery County Extension Office 334.270.4133. Also visit www.capcitymga.org.

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The 37th Annual Eagle Awareness!

Eagle Awareness Weekends are unique and so special. Created to coincide with Alabama’s Bald Eagle Restoration Program in 1985, steeped in the tradition of birding lore and legend, and led by some of the best conservationists and birders in the field, these Friday through Sunday Lake Guntersville State Park events bring people of diverse backgrounds and common interests together in one of the most beautiful parks in Alabama to observe and learn about one of the most mesmerizing avian species on the planet. Every moment is filled with wonder, delight, old and new friends, adventure, and educational opportunities. The park’s Pinecrest Dining Room serves delicious

meals and whether you stay in a lodge room, chalet, or in the campground, the amenities are excellent. Eagle Awareness Weekends feature live bird demonstrations and programs provided by notable speakers, guided safaris for viewing eagles in their natural habitat, and the natural beauty of the mountains and Lake Guntersville.

Each year we welcome hundreds of guests to experience and learn about the natural history of these majestic eagles, other birds of prey, and wild creatures. Exclusive opportunities are offered each year during Eagle Awareness weekends through our packages, these include lodging, two breakfasts, and one dinner, a welcome packet, VIP access to presentations, discounts at the restaurant and gift shop, photo opportunities with birds of prey, activities for children, engagement with featured sponsors, one-on-one access with the naturalists, and memories that last for a lifetime. It's no wonder that these weekends are the perfect gift for the one that has "everything". These weekends fill quickly so we encourage you to reserve your package as soon as possible.

Make your reservations for the following weekends:

January 20-22, 2023

January 27-29, 2023

February 3-5, 2023

For more information regarding Eagle Awareness Weekends at Lake Guntersville State Park, please contact: indya.guthrie@ dcnr.alabama.gov For Reservations: Call (256) 505-6621 OR 1-800-ALA-PARK or email guntersvillereservation.statepark@dcnr. alabama.gov

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Dr. John Ed Mathison Documentary – Frazer Church

Frazer Media has partnered with Wet Paint Films to produce an original documentary about our Pastor Emeritus, Dr. John Ed Mathison. Featuring interviews with Frazer members, pastors, ministry leaders, family, and friends, this documentary tells the story of John Ed's life and his work in ministry. John Ed retired in June 2008 after 36 years of serving as the senior minister of Frazer Church. Since then, John Ed Mathison Leadership Ministries was established to help equip pastors and churches, including participating in the global Billion Soul Initiative. The Premiere will take place on November 2 at 6 PM in Wesley Hall and will include interviews with the filmmakers and with John Ed himself.

Whether you have been involved with First Choice for years or are just discovering what we are all about, you do not want to miss the annual Celebration of Life Gala benefiting our pregnancy resource center! Join us in hearing stories of what God has done through the ministry over the past four decades. It promises to be a night of celebration and worship! For more information or to register for the 2022 Celebration of Life Gala, please visit our website at www.supportfirstchoice.org . First Choice Women's Medical Center opened as Sav-A-Life Montgomery in 1982. Our vision is to reach abortion-vulnerable members of our community in the name of Christ to make life their first choice. We provide Christ-centered medical, parenting, and life-skill services to extend help, offer hope, and promote healing. Celebration of Life Gala, Thursday, November 3rd, 6:30-8:30 pm, Renaissance Hotel, Downtown Montgomery

By Alexandra Raphael

My Grandbaby Boom

Becoming

I was caught off guard when my son asked me if we could take care of his ten-month-old daughter for ten days. Although I wanted to respond magnanimously, I found the prospect of such a long babysitting gig scary. Bowie had slept at our house twice in her short life, but she had stayed less than twentyfour hours each time. It didn't help Darrel (my partner) and me to relax, when my son e-mailed us an Excel spreadsheet of Bowie's schedule, color-coded to show every nap, snack and playtime.

When we bought our house, we were not thinking that one day we might share a large brood of grandchildren. We were thinking about what a wonderful, selfish life we could have together | Credit: Juan Pablo Serrano Arenas

Darrel and I met when our children were fully grown and independent. When we bought our house, we were not thinking that one day we might share a large brood of grandchildren. We were thinking about what a wonderful, selfish life we could have together.

Darrel had lost his wife to cancer. I was a long-time divorcee. We moved into a skinny row house in downtown Toronto, just big enough for the two of us and the occasional weekend guest. We did not buy a crib to put in our extra bedroom. I never imagined that within five years, I would become the grandmother of seven children under five years of age. This might seem short-sighted on my part since the probability of having grandchildren is fairly high for those who have children. But in my case, my grandparenting experience has been compounded. My own children gave me three grandchildren. To this bounty, Darrel's children added four more.

From Single Mother to Grandmother

I fully appreciate each of these little people who have now become part of my life. But since I spent most of my thirties and forties as a single working mother of two children, I did not picture a future for myself as the matriarch of a large, blended family. I was not and never will be an earth mother.

I was a typical 1980s feminist. My dream was to become a big firm lawyer. I saw myself striding into a boardroom in shiny high heels, swaddled in an expensive suit with mega-shoulders, toting a big leather briefcase.

But when my daughter arrived, this fantasy faded. After my return from maternity leave, the shoulders of all of my suits smelled like spit-up. Occasionally, I grabbed the diaper bag rather than my briefcase in my haste to get to the office. Eventually I realized that I should stop trying to fake it. I found a job in government with more humane hours. My husband and I had a second child, but we no longer had the same vision of our future. We divorced a few years later.

This part of my life story is ridiculously close to the plot line of "Baby Boom," a 1987 comedy about the clash between feminism and motherhood. The movie is about a high-powered Madison Avenue advertising executive, J.C., who has forsworn motherhood and domesticity. J.C., played by Diane Keaton, becomes the guardian of a baby when the baby's parents die in a car crash. She is totally smitten by the baby and soon realizes that she cannot keep up with the demands of her job.

After many hilarious scenes in which J.C. proves to herself that "she can't have it all," she quits her firm and moves to Vermont where she can devote herself to being a parent. J.C.'s boyfriend doesn't want to abandon his glamorous life and stays in Manhattan.

While babysitting Bowie, I started to think about a sequel to this movie. In this (yet to be made) film, J.C. meets her soulmate twenty-five years later, and moves back to Manhattan. Her plan is to live a selfish New York lifestyle with her new partner. But then things take an unexpected turn. Their kids get jobs in

The author's granddaughter, Bowie Credit: Alexandra Raphael

Manhattan and move to New York with their growing families. J.C. finds herself pushing a stroller through Central Park and whiling away her afternoons at the Children's Museum. J.C. likes being a grandma. She realizes that the best parts of her life were not in her plan.

A Love for My Role as Grandma

It is the fifth night of our babysitting gig. Darrel and I are watching Bowie on the baby monitor. It looks like she is finally drifting off to sleep. Things had started out well this evening but when I took Bowie onto my lap to give her a little cuddle while she drank her bottle, milk seeped out of the bottle and down her neck, soaking her sleeper with sticky white fluid. Bowie was far too tired by this time to deal with me wrestling her out of her wet sleeper and

into a dry one. She started to wail. It took another half hour of rocking and singing until she was ready sleep. We were both exhausted by the time I got her into her crib at 7:30 pm.

At last, there are no more baby sounds coming from the monitor. Bowie's tiny little body is curled into a corner of her crib. On the monitor, she looks so soft and small that it is hard to believe that

her cries can fill our whole house when she is hungry or tired and cannot cope with the world any longer.

I think about the morning when I will hear Bowie stirring in her crib. I will tiptoe soundlessly into her room so that I can listen to her babbling for a few minutes.

I know that when she sees me, her whole face will crease into smiles, and she will sit up. I know that she will forgive me for dripping milk down her neck the night before, when all she wanted to do was sleep. She always forgives me. After all, I'm her grandma.

Alexandra Raphael lives in Toronto with her partner and her dog, Moses. She retired from practicing law in 2017 and is currently on the Board of Directors of Centennial College. Her writing has appeared in The Globe and Mail, on the ReThink Breast Cancer website and on Medium.

Source: www.nextavenue.org

Joy Blondheim

"The Joy to Life Foundation is an invaluable partner with the Alabama Department of Public Health's Alabama Breast and Cervical Cancer Early Detection Program" -Nancy Wright director of ABCCEDP.

This month’s cover profile is Joy Blondheim. As many of you know, Joy along with her husband Dickie, started the Joy to Life Foundation with the mission of providing free mammograms and other screenings when necessary to medically underserved women in Alabama. Joy to Life has been doing this great work since 2001 and they will be having their annual fundraiser, “Walk of Life” on Saturday, October 15th. Joy is a leader in the Breast Cancer Community and her efforts have been a Godsend to many women in Alabama, especially those with the greatest need. Joy recently shared some of her story with us and we wanted to share it with you. If you have a heart for those touched by Breast Cancer, please gather your friends and plan to participate in this year’s Walk of Life, your support provides hope and love to those in need.

BOOM!: Please give us a brief biography, i.e., where you’re from, education, what brought you to the Montgomery area, did you raise your family here, schools, married, family, etc.?

Joy: I was adopted in Chicago, Illinois at 3 weeks old by my Parents Hilly and Hazel Aronov in 1947 and immediately brought back to Montgomery to the most wonderful family a girl could ask for. I have lived here all my life growing up in the public school system. I graduated Sidney Lanier H.S. in 1965. Then I went

on to the University of Georgia. Dickie and I married in 1967 and in 1969 our first child was born in Atlanta, Georgia. After Dickie’s service in the Military in Tahlequah, Oklahoma we moved back to Montgomery in 1973 and have been here ever since. Our second child was born 3 weeks after arriving back home in 1973. Our older son Brad is 53 and lives with his 7-year-old son Alex in Los Angeles. Brad produces reality TV shows for multiple networks. Our younger son Hilly, is 49 and is employed by the Hansen Group and lives in Atlanta with

his wife Michele and their 2 children, Max 14 years old and Zac who is almost 12 years old.

BOOM!: Many of our readers know you through your Joy to Life Foundation which you and your husband founded in 2001. Would you please share the beginnings of your journey in founding this valuable organization and its mission? How has Joy to Life evolved over the past twenty years? How would you measure the impact of Joy to Life in the Breast Cancer Community of Alabama?

Joy after Lymphodema Surgery at MD Anderson Cancer Center

Joy and Dickie wearing our New Joy to Life Logo.

Joy doing her best to cut the grass with her "pink lawn mower"

Joy: In 1997 I was diagnosed at age 49 with stage 2 breast cancer with Lymph Node involvement. I had a bilateral mastectomy with reconstruction at M. D. Anderson Cancer Center in Houston, Texas. It was a 13-hour surgery that was followed by 8 months of chemotherapy. It was the most difficult time of our lives. As I began to recover, I thanked God every day for good health, wonderful family and a magnificent group of friends that dedicated themselves totally to me as I went through treatment.

When my husband Dickie and I got back to some normalcy in our lives, we began to think of ways we could give back to our community because we were so grateful and blessed to have come through a very trying time. We knew that there were thousands of women in our tri-county area that did not have the advantages that I had---particularly, those women without good medical insurance. We approached a national organization with our idea of providing free mammography to women who had no insurance and no means to pay. We knew that Medicaid paid for women over 50 to have a mammogram but for those women under 50 there was a huge void. The organization that we approached did not think our idea would work, so we decided to try ourselves. After much research and discussions

with community leaders the Joy to Life Foundation became a reality in 2001.

Now let’s fast forward to 2022.

OUR MISSION

The Joy to Life Foundation has a simple mission: provide free mammograms and other breast cancer screenings when necessary to medically underserved women in Alabama, provide limited grants when needed, build and support

breast cancer awareness among all Alabamians, and overall good health, well-being, and education throughout the state.

The Joy to Life Foundation now serves people in ALL 67 counties in the state of Alabama. Since 2001, we have partnered with the Breast and Cervical Cancer Early Detection Program at the Alabama Department of Public Health to help women ages 40 to 49. Out of our own Joy to Life Office we help women and some men (yes, men get breast cancer too!) any age under 40. We are the only organized group in the State of Alabama that will provide funding for a man to have breast screenings. We have provided funding for over 98,000 breast screenings in the State. Many, many lives have been saved!

According to Nancy Wright, Director Cancer Prevention and Control Division for Alabama Department of Public Health:

"The Joy to Life Foundation is an invaluable partner with the Alabama Department of Public Health's Alabama Breast and Cervical Cancer Early Detection Program (ABCCEDP). For nearly 20 years, Joy and Richard Blondheim, its co-founders, have helped our program provide no cost mammograms to

Son Brad and Grandson Alex Blondheim

Dickie Blondheim

Daughter-in-law Michele, son Hilly, Grandsons Max And Zac

Joy, grandsons Max and Alex

women who have no insurance and a low income. They have saved hundreds of lives. As the Foundation has grown over the years, they have moved from providing support for counties in the Montgomery region, to providing support statewide. They are the only non-profit in our state that provides funding and support statewide.

In addition to providing funds to ABCCEDP, the Foundation also assists high risk or symptomatic women under age 40, who are not eligible for the program, receive breast cancer screening. Without the Foundation, these uninsured, low-income women would be unable to receive free lifesaving help. It has been an honor to work with the Blondheim's in providing breast cancer screening services to women in need across Alabama”

BOOM!: Your signature fundraising event, “Walk of Life” is coming up October 15th in Downtown Montgomery, please share the excitement surrounding it’s return, its new month, and how our readers can participate? Are there other ways our readers can support Joy to Life and its efforts for early detection of Breast Cancer?

Joy: After a 2½ year absence because of the pandemic, we are very excited about our Walk of Life coming back on October 15. We hope our community will support this major fundraiser

by registering at www.joytolife.org. People will have the opportunity to register from now all the way to the day of the Walk of Life. We need everyone’s help to make this a success. The Walk of Life in 2019, before Covid, had 3000 participants, and we would love to see those crowds again! The Walk of Life is a celebration of life and a time to reflect on those who lost their battle with Breast Cancer. The Walk begins at 8:30 am and the Start is always a moment you don’t want to miss!

In addition to supporting the Walk of Life, your readers can support the Joy to Life Foundation by purchasing our Pink Car Tag, buying our Pink Trash Cans, or simply donating to our mission. Every dollar is deeply appreciated, and the community’s support is never taken for granted. Again, we hope to see

everyone on October 15 when we bring the Walk of Life back “To Life”!

The public's support is more important than ever this year. The Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation closed its affiliate in North Alabama leaving a void for so many women who needed their services. With no hesitation, Joy to Life decided we must fill that void and assume

Komen’s responsibilities in north Alabama. Joy to Life has doubled its screening program because of the Susan G. Komen Offices closing in Alabama!

BOOM!: Your husband Dickie is a co-founder at Joy to Life (JTL), would you please describe the experience of working with your husband in growing and nurturing JTL? What’s the secret to working with your spouse in getting things done?

Joy: Obviously, breast cancer and its prevention are our passion ---- It has been such a fulfilling experience to create and develop the foundation together to see our vision become a reality --- We bounce ideas off of each other and we really listen to each other as we work together to accomplish our goals --- We have always had great mutual respect for one another and have always been kind to each other. We always worked together from the moment we married. We were always united in raising our children and now “D and JJ” are always united in spoiling our grandchildren!

BOOM!: Many of our readers listen to podcasts for information, entertainment, and education. You have a podcast at JTL, would you share how that came about and why? How can people get your podcast?

Joy: Tommy and Nancy Fields of Big Dreamz Creative, suggested that we try to do a podcast. Tommy thought it would be a great way to introduce Joy to Life to a wider audience, and a way to let our followers become more familiar with our mission in a relaxed format. We do our best to give our listeners good

Grandson Zac, 11 years old, a fishing surprise

Grandson Max, 13 yrs old, thinking HR!

Grandson Alex 6 years old learning to surf

information about breast cancer, good health habits, delicious healthy recipes, and moving and dynamic stories from survivors and their families. We always hope our podcast will touch people, give them good up to date information about breast cancer and healthy lifestyles and maybe make a difference in their lives!

I was very nervous about doing a podcast at first but now it is something I look forward to and I hope the public learns something they didn’t know before. I personally learn something new every time we produce a new podcast. “Everything Joy to Life” can be found on our website or wherever people listen to podcasts.

BOOM!: With a busy life, how do you like to spend time with family and friends? Describe your experience as a grandmother?

Joy: Dickie and I love to spend time with our family and friends! We try to see our children and grandchildren as much as possible. Our younger son Hilly his wife Michele, Max and Zac live in Atlanta, so we see them quite often. Our other son, Brad is in California, so a quick road trip is out of the question. I am a very fearful flyer, but we do take most of our vacations to California to spend time with Brad and his little boy, Alex.

Skiing used to be our big vacation trip in Park City, Utah when our children were growing up, and we are trying to resurrect that trip with the grandchildren now. It is a wonderful family vacation!

We spend most of our time these days

watching the grandchildren play baseball, basketball, and soccer and when they come to our home, they like nothing more than fishing in our pond to try and catch the “big one”! Hours are spent fishing and talking on the dock! And even when it’s just the two of us, there is nothing more relaxing than enjoying our property or just sitting on the dock with a Martini talking and enjoying a beautiful sunset!

BOOM!: JTL has become part of the AUTLIVE Cancer Program and fundraiser started by The Bruce Pearl Family Foundation, what’s that like partnering with Coach Pearl and one of his passions?

Joy: We were so deeply touched when Coach Pearl selected the Joy to Life Foundation as one of his Foundation’s charities to support. His Foundation's focus is on helping children and families in Alabama who are facing life threatening illnesses. Coach Pearl genuinely cares about people, and he truly recognizes the importance of our lifesaving mission! We are extremely grateful to him for that. Coach Pearl is making a difference in our state, and Auburn is lucky to have him.

BOOM!: What is it about living in the Montgomery/River Region area that you like? What do we need more of?

Joy, Dickie and grandson Zac

Joy: Montgomery has always been my home, and when Dickie and I made the decision to raise our children here, I was absolutely thrilled! Although no community is perfect, Montgomery was a wonderful place to raise a family then, and I very much hope the young people today see the advantages of what a smaller town can provide. I believe it is easier to find a place for yourself in a smaller community. We have made wonderful friends and connections in Montgomery, and those connections have made a difference for us both personally and professionally. When the foundation began, we were certainly lucky and blessed to have so many people to reach out to whom we felt might help us start Joy to Life. As we began our journey, not only did we find that to be true, but we also met so many others that were absolutely embracing of our idea.

There are many positives about living in the Montgomery area but the one thing I know we need to continue to work on is education, particularly so our resident population will continue to increase. A good public school system is critical to bringing more businesses and families to the area.

Dickie and I love living in Montgomery, and we will always continue to do our part to improve our community.

BOOM!: As you’ve aged, how have your priorities changed? How would you describe what it means to “age well”?

Joy: As we have aged, Dickie and I have learned to take a breath before we let the little things aggravate us. We’ve learned if we have the right attitude, we can handle most problems. We take “one day at a time” and try not get overwhelmed. With age comes a quiet understanding of what is important in life. So “don’t sweat the small stuff”!

We both feel we are aging well because we work at staying well every day. We try to eat right, we exercise, we keep a positive spirit, and we stay connected to people. Connection is a very important

component to maintaining a healthy mental attitude.

BOOM!: Give us three words that describe you?

Joy: This is a very difficult question for me to personally answer, so I asked Dickie to answer this question. This is his response:

“Absolutely Named Properly”

BOOM!: Do you have any hobbies or other activities that grab your attention?

Joy: I love to exercise and be outdoors. I have walked regularly with the same good friends for 40 years, and I still love our weekend walks together. The pace has gotten a bit slower, and the talking a bit longer, but it is a special time for us. The memories we share are priceless!!!!

BOOM!: What are some of the future challenges you’re contemplating for the Joy to Life Foundation? For yourself?

Joy: The largest challenge we have is also the absolute biggest dream we have for the Foundation! Our dream and our challenge are to create a breast cancer survivor serenity park with an 8,000 square foot butterfly conservatory as its focal point. The park will be dedicated to Breast Cancer and Survivorship using the butterfly as a metaphor for HOPE! There are only 300 butterfly conservatories in the world and Joy to Life will have the unique distinction of having the only one in the world dedicated to breast cancer and all cancer survivors.

Because of the historical impact of civil rights in Montgomery, tourism has become a leading industry here. We know that the butterfly conservatory would attract another 250,000 to 400,000 people adding to an already booming industry. The breast cancer survivor park is a dream Dickie and I have had for years, and we continue to work toward making this vision come true. Hopefully within the next year our fundraising will begin, and everyone will hear more about this incredible project.

BOOM!: Many people, as they age, experience a renewed sense of purpose, new goals, etc. How would you describe this sense of renewal in your life? Any advice for the rest of us seeking renewal? What are your thoughts on retirement?

Joy: I learned a renewed sense of purpose at 49 years old when, out of nowhere, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Shortly after my diagnosis I knew that my life would change, and I would work hard to help others facing the same challenge. At the time I didn’t know how I would help I just knew I would.

I began volunteering even during chemo with the American Cancer Society, and as I began sharing my experiences with other cancer survivors, it not only helped them, but it also helped me. It made me realize that the rest of my life would be dedicated to helping make a difference in any way that I could. Twenty-two years later, with the help of so many people along the way, Joy to Life has made a difference for so many women and changed my life forever!

We want to thank Joy for sharing some of her life's story with us this month. Be sure to share and let her know you read her story in BOOM! Also, thanks to her husband Dickie for navigating the technology highway to share their photos. If you want to reach out to Joy, email her at joy@joytolife.org.

If you want to support Joy to Life or Walk of Life visit www.joytolife.org. Thanks to DiAnna Paulk and her creative photography skills, you're the best! If you have questions, comments, or suggestions about our cover profiles, including nominating someone, please text them to Jim Watson at 334.324.3472 or email them to jim@riverregionboom.com

THE WAY WE WASN’T

"A true story from the Greg files"

My high school graduating class is having another one of those benchmark reunions this month.

While pondering my RSVP, I recalled a comment made by the most influential teacher in my life, Miss Donna Banks.

I had Miss Banks for English and Journalism. I aced them both but her everlasting contribution to my career was her emphasis on creative thinking. The process of seeking interesting things, or better yet- finding something interesting about something seemingly boring, has come in handy over 5 decades in media.

Something else Miss Banks said in class also stuck with me.

She was thirty-something at the time when she said “I hated my 20s! I would NEVER want to relive my 20s again!”.

This struck a room of 17–18-year-olds as odd. No one said it out loud, but we were thinking, “you’d rather be OLDER than younger?”!

Miss Banks was a wise woman. I was half-way into my 30s when her statement made inarguable sense.

Recently it occurred to me to ask my Facebook family (most are past 29) about that era in life.

The question- what did you care about in your twenties that you don’t care about today? Hundreds of people replied. They made me laugh, cry and realize how un-uniquely the same we are.

The Top 3 answers1. Caring what other people think about me.

I get it. It took several trips to rehab to finally form my own opinion of who I am. It took time to separate myself from my work. Obviously, I care that enough people love what I do so I can keep doing what I love. If someone doesn’t like me personally, well, that’s their opinion and I just don’t have time to try and change it. Or worry about it.

2. Partying/Going Out Funny how this works.

In my 20s, I had to have something lined up for the weekend. Every weekend. A Saturday night that didn’t involve a woman or place to be seemed like such a wasted opportunity! Then things changed. I recall a Saturday evening in my early 30s. I had a nice place with a highrise view of the ocean in Pompano Beach. I had nothing planned, but did have a great book, a few movies on VHS (LOL) and was shocked at how happy I was to relax and do nothing. Was I growing up? Finally?

3. Stuff

One of my Facebook commenters laughingly looked back on his obsession with the size of the speakers in his car and home audio system. This was an aspect of life where size mattered. Oh, my beautiful Marantz tuner pumping Styx into my 5-foot-tall speakers and the several of the first 48-inch TVs among many other baubles. I watched all of it roll down the driveway at 10 cents on the dollar when times got tough- hell, they were awful- in the late 90s. Friends consoled me by saying “Greg, it’s just

stuff. It can be replaced”. They were right of course. Over time, I replaced all my stuff. In fact, I over-replaced it. Now, I’m trying to get rid of stuff. There’s a garage sale coming up! I’ll announce the date as soon as I can move the Grade B stuff out of the way so people can buy the Grade A stuff, I wonder why I bought in the first place.

Honorable Mention in the Facebook experiment went to Cars, My Appearance and Trying to Please Everybody. The thread was beautiful in that so many expressed what they really care about nowGod, family and the USA.

So, about the reunion RSVP. I went to my 40th and left

very disappointed. When I signed in, I saw a list of familiar names and asked if they were attending. “No”, I was told. “They’re dead”.

Wow! Welcome back! It reminded me of the scene in Gone With The Wind when the Atlanta newspaper was handing out casualty lists from Gettysburg.

For a good part of the night, I sat with a couple buddies chatting over a bowl

STUFF-like 5ft black lacquer speakers

of mostaccioli (a Chicago dining staple). We didn’t talk chicks. Or sports. Or music.

Everyone was retiring or getting ready for it. Not one person still lived in the Chicago city limits. A few lively stories about Viagra broke up the never-ending diatribe about surgeries and things “I don’t do anymore”.

Before the “party” and against my better judgement, I drove back to my old neighborhood.

Once a monument to the Greatest Generation and Boomerhood, I was sickened by its decaying state. Not one of the original neighbors was left. They’d fled Chicago like everyone else. The safest place on earth seemed cold and hostile. My high school was in disrepair with broken windows, and enough wear and tear to be emblematic of a very broken city (as you may have heard in the news).

The roads were wretched, traffic abysmal. I stopped by the cemetery where Mom and Dad rest and came to a conclusion.

“Mom. Pops. Next time I see you we’ll all be in the same place. I can’t come back here anymore”.

If I hated what I saw 10 years ago, it’s only going to be worse in 2022. For more information, visit www.HeyJackass.com.

My Reunion RSVP is “no”. I’ll spend that weekend at the Alabama Fair thanking people who keep me doing what I love.

The River Region is my happy home. I don’t need to travel 700 miles to relive the “good old days”.

Instead, I’ll abide by one of my alltime favorite song lyrics by BOOMer Goddess Carly Simon, from her song “Anticipation”

Sing along!

“And stay right here, 'cause these are the good old days".

These. Are. The. Good. Old. Days!

(If you have a comment on this column, email me at gregbudell@aol.com. It's still fun to hear from new people!)

Greg Budell lives in Montgomery with his wife, Roz, Stepson, Sho, and dogs Hershey and Briscoe. He’s been in radio since 1970, and has marked 16 years in the River Region. He hosts the Newstalk 93.1FM Morning Show with Rich Thomas, Jay Scott & Jessie Lynn, 6-9 AM Monday-Friday. He returns weekday afternoons from 3-6 PM for Happy Hour with sidekick Rosie Brock. Greg can be reached at gregbudell@aol.com

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By Amy C. Rea

Should Committed Couples Sleep in Separate Rooms?

Sleeping apart is becoming more known and accepted. Why aren't people talking about it?

It's so common that it's almost a cliché: One (or both) parties in a committed relationship snores too much, and for the other person, the reaction can be: My spouse's snoring is killing me. (Or possibly, If they don't stop snoring, I'll kill them.)

But other than shoving your partner onto their side to see if that eases the snoring, sending them to the doctor for a sleep apnea test or trying noisecanceling headphones or earplugs, what else can be done? You can't possibly sleep in another room. Committed couples are supposed to sleep together. If you sleep in separate rooms, others will assume that something's wrong with your relationship. In fact, you might think there's something wrong with your relationship.

"One night when I elbowed him in the forehead, he started sleeping on the futon more regularly."

Here's the good news: You're not the only ones sleeping apart. What's more, as more research is done on couples' sleeping patterns, sleeping apart is becoming more known and accepted.

Wendy Troxel, senior behavioral scientist at the RAND Corporation and

author of "Sharing the Covers: Every Couple's Guide to Better Sleep," studies sleep behaviors and science, and she said that sleeping apart shouldn't be viewed as stigmatizing; there's no right or wrong way for a couple to get their night's sleep, as long as what they do works for them.

When Sleeping Together is Disruptive Audrey Henley from Beloit, Wisconsin, learned soon after moving in with her boyfriend that sleeping in the same room was going to cause issues for them. "He would snore, which prevented me from falling asleep, and I moved around a lot," she said. "At the time we had bad air conditioning, so on hot nights he would sleep on the futon in the living room. One night when I elbowed him in the forehead, he started sleeping on the futon more regularly."

They've since moved into a house and have separate bedrooms. "We considered buying a larger mattress to make sleeping in the same bed work, but we talked about it and decided to keep having our own beds," Henley

said. "We go to bed at different times and work on projects late at night without bothering each other."

Sometimes the need for separate sleeping spaces comes from life changes, whether women going through perimenopause or someone in the relationship developing medical conditions. Some treatments, such as sleep apnea, may be medically treated.

Karla Huston of Lakewood, California, was married nearly 50 years before beginning to regularly sleep separately from her husband. "From time to time I would go to the sofa or my daughter's bedroom where I could get some sleep," she said. But then he was diagnosed with prostate cancer, and the treatment caused him to have hot flashes and need to use the bathroom frequently during the night. As his caregiver, she needed rest more than ever.

"I like it when she sleeps with me, and I like it when she doesn't. Nobody's mad, nobody's sad."

"That doesn't make you any less married or less of a couple or less intimate with each other," she said. "You've got to sleep. You're a better person, able to tackle what comes in front of you when you have a good night's rest."

Sleeping Apart as a Preference

Sometimes there isn't a major physical problem, just a case of separate arrangements being the most comfortable. Amy Boland of Minneapolis noted that she and her wife married in her 40s when they'd already had considerable life experience sleeping separately.

"It's a big adjustment to sleep together every night," she said. Her wife sometimes is restless or needs a fan to sleep and usually goes to her separate room at that point.

"I like it when she sleeps with me, and I like it when she doesn't. Nobody's mad, nobody's sad," Boland said.

Committed Couple, Sleeping Apart: What the Experts Say Troxel thinks these partners made smart decisions. She doesn't advise every couple to take that step, but notes that it benefits a good many people.

"I'd love to see the conversation move into putting sleep as a priority in your relational goals," she said. "That third of our lives where we're not awake has a critical function in our relationships. Prioritizing that need and being open and willing to problem-solve to find strategies that are going to work for you is the best thing you can give your relationship."

Licensed marriage and family therapist Megan Bearce of Minneapolis, author of "Super Commuter Couples," noted that even 15 years ago, The New York Times did a story on homebuilders who saw increased demand for homes with two main bedrooms. Yet the stigma of being thought to have marital problems remains.

"The elephant in the room is the guilt and shame that sometimes gets attached," she said. She noted that couples who have different work shifts, such as one works days and one nights, don't sleep together much and no one thinks twice about it.

"We found that those who weren't sleeping well were more likely to exhibit specific relational behaviors, including the display of hostility."

In reaching out on social media for sources for this story, I received dozens of replies from people who sleep apart, but several who didn't want to go on record about it, showing anecdotally that the stigma is alive and well.

What Happens When We Don't Get Enough Sleep

"Lack of sleep is linked to relational effects," Troxel said. "We know that sleep-deprived conditions cause profound disruptions to our mood, irritability levels go up, we're more likely to develop depression, anxiety, substance abuse disorder, and communication skills suffer. We also become less empathic, all of which can be toxic for a relationship."

Studies conducted in a sleep lab showed Troxel just how bad things could be when partners engaged in a common conflict. "We found that those who weren't sleeping well were more likely to exhibit specific relational behaviors, including the display of hostility. That's where the goal of communication is really to hurt the other person," she said. "When you're sleep-deprived, you're more likely to lean towards those toxic behaviors, which then have an impact on the partner who may or may not be sleepdeprived."

-

How to Approach the Topic of Sleeping Apart

"Have a constructive conversation about why you're doing this," said Bearce. "Some people think it's forever, and they shut down. So make the change in shorter bits: 'Hey, let's try this for a week.'"

Troxel also points to the need for conversation and intentionality, noting that that openness may lead to a result that works, whether it's sleeping apart together with different arrangements. "Don't have the conversation when you're both sleep-deprived and angry," she said.

But do have the conversation: She's seen couples who evolved into sleeping apart without talking and ended up with one partner mad about the snoring, while the snorer felt rejected and hurt. Getting it out in the open and determining the best way for both sides to get enough sleep is key. If there are kids still at home, be sure to let them know what's going on, or they may worry that their parents are divorcing.

Henley has found separate bedrooms improved her relationship. "Sleeping in different rooms won't make you grow apart, it will just make it easier to get a restful night's sleep," she said. "I would say we get along more and fight less because we both sleep better. Have an honest conversation with your partner and give it a trial run."

Amy C. Rea is a writer from St. Anthony, Minnesota, whose work has been published in Heavy Table, Growler Magazine, and Midwesterner, among others.

www.nextavenue.org

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To Scrub or Not to Scrub…

Scrub, exfoliate, polish…

We’re not talking about cleaning pots and pans, or scrubbing the floor, we’re talking about removing a layer of dead skin cells from your epidermis (your skin). Your skin is creating new cells and shedding old cells every day; we actually lose a shocking 200,000,000 (yes, you read that right!) EVERY HOUR! Some of these do actually fall off, get transferred onto things we come into contact with –clothes, sheets, etc., but that still leaves a lot just lining the surface of our skin.

When your skin feels a little “rough” to the touch, as opposed to “smooth as a baby’s bottom”, that’s when you know you need to exfoliate and get rid of a layer of those dead cells. Your skin can also develop a dullness in appearance and fine lines will become evident over time. This layer of cells can also create the production of whiteheads and blackheads as hair follicles become blocked and/or sebum trapped. All signs that you need to pay your skin some attention. The good news is that many of these signs can and will be reversed by the simple act of exfoliation.

Both body and face can benefit from a regular exfoliation routine, but do not use the same products on both! Your face has skin that is much more sensitive and needs to be treated differently to your body, especially hands and feet.

Basically there are three levels of exfoliation – the roughest, for your hands and feet can consist of coarse sea salt, pumice stones, ground walnut shells, even sand; the middle level,

Tracy

for your body, could consist of ground apricot kernels, oatmeal, fine sea salt, sugar, etc.; the finest level is for your face and is often referred to as a polish rather than a scrub, this could be fine sugar, ground oatmeal, powdered herbs and even fruit enzymes.

The very simplest rough exfoliator, to be used on hands and feet, would consist of something like: a cup of coarse sea salt mixed with a tablespoon of olive oil and a few drops of your favorite essential oil (if desired). Mix well, then apply to damp skin, rub in well for a few minutes then rinse with warm water. Pat skin dry. Of course, you can use any of the rough level exfoliants – ground pumice, ground walnut shells, etc.

For the rest of the body a similar recipe is used but with a finer exfoliant. You can mix one or more together if you like, fine sea salt with oatmeal for example. Again, add a tablespoon of olive (or any other carrier oil – avocado, grape seed, wheat germ, vitamin E….) and again, your choice of adding essential oils or not, but only a few drops.

The face is a little trickier; you must

avoid the eye area and never use salt of any kind – if you get it in your eyes, it can be terrible. Use the finest ground polishing agents, like ground oatmeal, finely ground coffee grounds, extra fine sugar. Some people cannot even use these on their face, the skin is just too sensitive OR – like myself – their skin has just got thinner as it gets older (happens to us all, I’m afraid) and you find you can no longer scrub your face like you used to. In this case, enzymes are the way to go rather than abrasive granules. Enzymes help to break down the keratin in the skin's upper layers, which helps it lift off anything dead and it does this in a funky way. The enzymes literally digest the dead skin on your face. Sounds weird but it works!

You can try this recipe: 1 cup fresh pineapple, cubed ½ cup fresh papaya, cubed 1 Tbsp honey

Blend together and apply a thin layer to the face, avoiding eye area. You may feel a tingling sensation; if it gets too uncomfortable, remove it immediately, otherwise leave for 5-10 minutes then remove with warm water. Pat skin dry.

Other things you can try are puréed pumpkin (very in season!!) strawberries, kiwi. Any can be mixed with yoghurt and or honey. I promise you; your skin will thank you for the attention, and you will feel so much better in your own skin. One last word do not over exfoliate, you should not need to do this more than twice a week and if your skin is sensitive, only once.

Let me know how your experience goes. I’d love to hear about it.

25 years of using homeopathic remedies, it was time to take

as a source for useful essential oil and

questions

By Michele C. Hollow

How Music Taps Into the Emotions of People with Alzheimer's

On a recent book tour visit at an assisted living home, Elaine Durbach, of Maplewood, New Jersey, addressed a roomful of older adults in wheelchairs. They sat motionless with their eyes open. No one appeared interested until she asked, "How many of you remember your first love?"

"That's when the wicked grins and broad smiles formed," Durbach says. "Some sat up and raised their hands, offering to share their stories." They listened when she read from her novel, Roundabout, which is about a long-ago first love.

"She tapped into an important memory," says Sam Fazio, senior director of Quality Care and Psychosocial Research at the

Alzheimer's Association. "It's a memory most of us can recall quite well. It also opens up our emotions when we connect to something important to us or something we care about."

I noticed this when I brought my young child to visit a friend's mom living in a nursing home for people with Alzheimer's disease. My friend's mom and the others in the unit slumped in their chairs and showed no emotions.

We could see them through a glass partition. They sat like statues. When I opened the door, and people saw my two-year-old, almost everyone became animated. They wanted to hold my child and talk to him.

"The child sparked an emotion in some

people," Fazio says. "Not everyone responded. Perhaps a dog would get a response from others in the room. To get a response, you must make the right connection with the individual. It's like listening to music. What we like is personal."

According to Fazio, several studies prove music benefits those with Alzheimer's. Scientists have observed significant improvements in memory, orientation, depression, and anxiety in people with mild and moderate Alzheimer's who listened to music.

"Getting a reaction comes down to your musical preferences," Fazio says. "If you love classical music, you'll respond. If you don't, you won't respond."

Favorite songs, humor and storytelling help meaningful connections form.

Vaudeville Visits’ Dikki Ellis as Dapper Dan and Ilene Weiss as Beatrice, star of stage and screen, work together entertaining older adults with dementia and Alzheimer’s at several hospitals | Credit: © Photographer Florence-Montmare

Old-Time Tunes and Laughter

Deborah Kaufmann, the co-founder of Healthy Humor, an arts organization that brings music, laughter, and joy to older adults and children in several U.S. hospitals and senior residential care facilities, remembers one patient lying in bed staring at the ceiling.

"He was unresponsive for a while," she says. "I took his hand in mine, talked to him, and suddenly he started singing 'I Can't Give You Anything But Love Baby.'"

Kaufmann and another performer of Healthy Humor's Vaudeville Visits, a program specifically designed for older adults, sang it a second time. "This time, I stopped after "I can't give you anything but," and he filled in the blank," she says.

Vaudeville Visits' performers create easily recognizable iconic characters from the stage, screen, and culture. These include a Hollywood song and dance team, a chef, a bride, a used car salesman, and others.

In addition, the performers use music, juggling, puppetry, storytelling, and improvisation to entertain and engage.

"When Vaudeville Visits' performers entertain, we don't rush," Kaufmann says. "It may take a bit of time to connect with someone."

Penny Cook, president and CEO of Pioneer Network, a nonprofit organization working to transform the institutional culture of nursing homes to person-centered care, agrees, "we need to take the time to connect. Our primary goal is to move eldercare to a place where all care and support are person-directed; it's taking time to know the person and engaging with them."

Person-Centered Care

"Person-centered care means listening to our patients and focusing on their

needs," Cook explains. "It's about setting up the day to make it enjoyable. For instance, most of us enjoy that first cup of hot coffee in the morning. It's a simple pleasure we miss when we don't have it. But missing it can change the trajectory of the day."

"That cup of coffee is a simple pleasure that makes such a big difference. It's important to provide that to people as they get older," she says, adding they know this small gesture of personcentered care benefits the patients.

At age 93, Cook's stepfather moved into a nursing home. He had dementia and mobility issues. At the assessment, the nursing home staff asked personal questions and found out he loved listening to classical music; they placed a CD player by his bed.

"He had no idea how to use the CD player," Cook says. "And it was placed in a hard-to-get spot that my mom couldn't reach when she visited. It would be so easy having a staff member press 'play.'"

A Collaborative Approach

Patients, especially those in long-term care, want their doctors to know their likes, dislikes, and needs. In addition, studies have shown that collaborative care can improve physical and psychological health and strengthen a patient's confidence.

"The staff also benefits," Fazio says. "They interact more with their patients, and there's less turnover."

Dikki Ellis, who has performed with Vaudeville Visits, often hears praise and thanks from overworked medical personnel. When visiting patients, the mood on the floor is light and joyful. "Laughter makes people more accommodating," Ellis says.

"Someone who may not be cooperative or in a bad mood is easier to work with because of the humor from these

interactions. It's something the staff appreciates," he adds.

Often the mood is joyful. Sometimes sorrow appears. "Either way, we have to be there for the patients," Ellis says. "Using humor, song or dance creates pathways to their memories. We enter the patient's room and look around for clues. There might be a photograph we can discuss. It might be a song or a joke."

One woman started weeping when they played a song that reminded her of her husband. "All of a sudden, she wanted to talk about him," Ellis says. "She missed him, and despite the tears, we didn't back away. We listened. It was an honor to be there."

Finding Clues to Memories

The nurses' station is one of the first stops in a hospital or elder care facility. Ellis and the other Vaudeville Visits performers inquire about the patients, their likes, and their ages. "Age can tell us about the music they grew up listening to," Ellis says.

One woman, who didn't communicate, loved bubbles. "There's a child inside each one of us, and the bubbles brought the kid out in her," he says. "She watched the bubbles and smiled. She has adult memories and childhood ones. We touched on one of those memories."

Michele C. Hollow is a freelance writer, editor and ghostwriter specializing in health, climate, social justice, pets and travel. Follow her on Twitter at @ michelechollow.

www.nextavenue.org

Getting To Know You

Angels for the Elderly

“Home is where the is”

Not just in Hallmark movies but in real life, HOME is where the heart is. Agree? For most of us, home is where we feel safe, loved and content. We have a favorite chair, comfy clothes and a routine that suits our personality and values. We have family and friends nearby who understand us and want the best for us. For many, HOME is definitely near the top of our blessings list.

As we enjoy this side of 50, most of us want to stay in our home, maintain our independence and thrive as best we can. What happens, though, when life throws a curve ball, and we’re faced with the unexpected and unwanted? Do you ever wonder what options are available when HOME is no longer a safe or comfortable place for you or your loved one? Maybe a fall, a stroke, an accident or even recovery from scheduled surgery leaves you uneasy about living independently in your home. Maybe you’re alone, possibly unable to drive or missing loved ones, co-workers and friends who can no longer keep in touch like they once did. Or just maybe, you’re one of a growing number who’ve noticed changes in cognitive or emotional health that make it risky for you or a loved one to live at home.

Could you use some good news? Would you be relieved to know that you or your loved one could be safe, loved and well cared for right here in the River Region—living in a comfortable home with those facing the same challenges you experience? Tucked away in the Dalraida neighborhood, Angels for the Elderly is just such a place! With four separate ranchstyle homes, Angels has a longstanding reputation as one of the area’s premiere Specialty Care Assisted Living communities. By state regulation, residents’ level of care and medical oversight are much stronger in the specialty care setting. With only 16 private bedrooms/baths in each house, Angels’ intimate houses aren’t just “homelike.” They actually look like home, smell like home, and quickly become home to residents and their loved ones who are valued and immediately accepted as part of the Angels’ family.

We all have a past, present and future. At Angels, we focus on the person, not the diagnosis. While residents may be “different,” we never see them as “less” or “broken.” Our experience shows that residents and family members can thrive, despite challenges they face. We are family, and we lovingly support one another--day

in and day out. Whether it’s chatting at the table, visiting in the hallway, rocking on the porch or engaging in daily oneon-one and group activities, we laugh, we cry, we play, we sing, we dance, we dream, we pray, we reminisce, and we encourage because we truly care about one another. Simply stated, our goal is to help residents and their families experience the joy of everyday living.

Have questions? Need more information or resources? We can help. Would you appreciate a listening ear or the benefit of our experience? We’re here for you. No obligation. No judgment. Whether you need a place to call home or you’re just gathering information for what the future may hold, we would be delighted to meet you. We’d love to answer questions and show you around our campus. We’ll even treat you to a delicious homecooked meal if you’d like to chat over lunch in our sunroom.

To schedule an appointment or learn more, contact Kim Wilson at 334.313.6138 or kwilson@ angelsfortheelderly. com. Please visit our Angels for the Elderly Facebook page to learn more about our activities, our campus and our incredible Angels’ family or our website, www.angelsfortheelderly.com

By Louise Chambers

Age-Defying Grandpa Dives Into a Lake, on 106th Birthday, Says God Takes Care of Him

A great-great-grandfather, who dove into a lake unassisted to celebrate his 106th birthday, is going viral for his age-defying antics.

Franklin Estes of Williamstown, Massachusetts, has two grandchildren, five great-grandchildren, and three greatgreat-grandchildren. He currently lives with one of his grandchildren, 55-year-old Shaun Kelley, and Shaun’s wife, Nancy, in Laconia, New Hampshire.

Franklin turned 106 on July 29.

“He celebrated his birthday with us in Laconia,” Shaun told The Epoch Times. “We had a family party for him with cake, ice cream, and his favorite: Manhattans!”

On the weekend that followed, Shaun took his grandfather out on his boat, where he spent the day with a few cocktails, lounging in a tube on the water.

“[He] then decided he wanted to dive off the boat before we got back to our slip at the marina,” Shaun said. “He felt fantastic. He loves the water, and loves doing things that defy his age.”

Franklin was so adamant that he didn’t need a life jacket that Shaun had to instruct his son to take one into the water.

The daring centenarian is no stranger to thrill-seeking, and Shaun and his family have always tried to do something special for their beloved patriarch’s birthday.

Shaun said: “A few years I took him golfing, once to the TPC at Sawgrass. At 101, we took him horseback riding, and when he turned 102, that was the first time he dove off my boat.”

Shaun shared footage of Franklin’s 106th birthday dive on TikTok, where it went viral. The reactions from the public have been “overwhelming.”

In another TikTok video, Shaun interviews his grandfather. Still sharp as a tack, the smiling 106-year-old says he owes his long

life to good, caring parents, and “God taking care” of him.

“Between TikTok and other platforms, he’s had well over 10 million views and tens of thousands of comments,” Shaun told The Epoch Times. “He’s blown away by the positive comments and encouragement.”

Franklin has been close to Shaun since he was a child and the pair have spent weeks and weekends with each other. When Shaun left for college, Franklin would visit, even attending college parties with the young student and his roommates. Since Shaun’s been married with a family of his own, Franklin’s been joining them on vacations.

“Years ago, I made a promise to him that I would never let him go into a nursing home,” Shaun said. “Last year, it got to be too much for him living on his own. On his 105th birthday, he had a pacemaker put in, and that was when he moved in with me. He was driving up until then!” Franklin did not have an easy life to begin with. He was born prematurely in Massachusetts in July of 1916, weighing just 2 pounds, 6 ounces (1.07 kg). He overcame polio and lived his childhood through the austerity of the Great Depression and the Second World War.

Despite the struggles of his early years, he went to college to study history and later married, welcoming a daughter, Barbara. He divorced his wife around 1970 but went on to meet the “love of his life,” Althea, whom he married in 1972. Sadly, she passed away from cancer in 1996.

Franklin worked as a plant manager for Gavitt Wire and Cable and retired at the age of 70.

Until he turned 100, sociable Franklin loved to play golf, swim, and exercise, and has always enjoyed making new friends, with whom he shares his stories. Today, he loves to read, nap, and watch Western movies, the news, and football on TV.

In 2020, Shaun took his grandfather to meet his favorite TV personality of all time, Tucker Carlson. Recalling the moment, Shaun said, “Tucker was extremely gracious and spent about 20 minutes talking and taking pictures with him. It was one of the highlights of his life.”

Witnessing his grandfather’s long life, Shaun said his grandfather’s secret is a healthy diet and exercise, “everything in moderation,” and faith in God.

“He’s a man of strong faith, and to this day gets on his knees to pray every night,” Shaun said. “Gramp has had a tough life … he’s a fighter, he perseveres. He’s taught me to never give up, work hard, and persevere through the hard times"times.”

Share your stories with us at emg.inspired@ epochtimes.com, and continue to get your daily dose of inspiration by signing up for the Inspired newsletter at TheEpochTimes.com/newsletter

Franklin, during his 106th birthday celebrations. (Courtesy of Shaun Kelley)

GRANDPARENT ALERT: Gogue Center announces 2022–23 Family Series

Series includes four family-friendly performances with tickets priced at $10 each

The Jay and Susie Gogue Performing Arts Center at Auburn University presents its 2022–23 Family Series beginning this October. The series, which features four family-friendly performances, will bring innovative, high-level children’s programming to the East Alabama performing arts venue throughout its current performance season. Arriving just in time for Halloween, the 2022–23 Family Series begins with the bilingual, multicultural musical “Sugar Skull: A Día de Muertos Musical Adventure” on Sunday, October 23. The new year brings a new story from the Hundred Acre Wood in Disney’s “Winnie the Pooh” on Tuesday, January 31. Two of Kwame Alexander beloved children’s books burst to life on stage as “Acoustic Rooster Barnyard Boogie: Starring Indigo Bloom” on Thursday, March 16. The series will conclude next spring as Mexican vocalist and songwriter Sonia De Los Santos joins Grammy-winning Americana folk duo the Okee Dokee Brothers for “Somos Amigos: Songs on Common Ground” on Friday, May 12. Seating for all four performances is general admission. Tickets are priced at $10 each. All performances in the series will be presented indoors at the Woltosz Theatre. Tickets for 2022–23 Family Series performances and all Gogue Center events can be purchased online at goguecentertickets.auburn.edu. For additional information, contact the Gogue Center box office at 334.844.TIXS (8497) or gpactickets@auburn.edu

By Bertha Lazenby Knox

I REMEMBER SYRUP MAKING TIME

Syrup making time is late October through November, but preparation beings in the early spring. The patch where the cane will be planted is broken up with a steel-beam plow and laid out in rows for planting. The sugar cane is uncovered where it was bedded in the fall and the fodder striped from the stalk, then the stalk is put into the row with the eyes on the stalk turned up so the shoots will have no problem coming through the soil, then it is covered with a plow.

Through the spring and early summer, it is cultivated and fertilized. After the cane is laid by for the summer the fodder is scattered in the middles where it will rot and make mulch, fertilizer and help keep the grass from growing. Wood is cut and stacked near the syrup mill to let dry for cooking the syrup.

Early October the work begins, the cane is cut and put in piles, and then the best stalks are selected to keep for planting in the spring. When the stalks have been bedded for spring planting the remainder of the cane is striped of fodder, loaded on the wagon, and hauled to the syrup mill for making syrup.

On the morning Papa was cooking syrup he was up early to

start the activities of the day. The mule was hitched to the pole that

The aroma from the syrup cooking could be smelled a far distance. The yellow jackets swarmed around the juice barrel and often my brothers were stung my them. I was not allowed to help at the syrup mill, but as usual I was there seeing what was taking place and sometimes, I would get stung by the yellow jackets.

One of the hardest jobs of syrup making was cleaning afterward. The grinder was washed and then the pipes flushed out. The cooking pan was the most difficult to clean because it was sticky from the syrup.

turned the grinder to extract the juice from the cane stalk. My brothers would take turns feeding the cane into the grinder. One would have to sit where the pole would not hit them as the mule went around. After the barrel was full it flowed into the cooking pan where

a fire was started and the cooking process

began. The juice was cooking into syrup as it flowed from one section of the pan to another until it reached the end, there the syrup dripped into another barrel to be put into gallon cans.

If you are driving north of Wallsboro on Hwy. 231 on the Saturday before Thanksgiving and you smell a pleasant aroma it will be Jimmy Stubbs cooking syrup. Stop by, drink some juice, fight off the yellow jackets and buy a gallon of sugar cane syrup. Go home and make a pan of cathead biscuits and sop syrup or bring out the old iron frying pan, put in some fresh butter, pour in the syrup, and make some pull candy. Good eating!!

Randy, Steven, Earl, and Mulder Knox cutting sugar cane