MY HEALTHY LIFE
Why Relationship Building Is the No. 1 Skill for 2020—and the Next Decade
S
trong relationships are vital to a healthy career. When you can’t make real connections with others in the workplace, they won’t feel loyal to you. You become a tradable commodity. When times get tough, you may be the first one pushed out the door. On the other hand, when you have a small group of close professional relationships, you’re able to get your ideas recognized and supported. You’re able to be a successful leader. You’re able to collaborate and innovate effectively and serve your clients in the way they deserve. Trust is the foundation of strong relationships—yet it’s noticeably absent from our culture. Over the last few decades, nearly every measure of trust has declined. This trust deficit and our professional relationship woes have grown in tandem with the rise of the Internet—and they’ve crept in so insidiously we may not have realized it was happening. The “normalizing” of digital relationships has masked the weakness of many professionals’ face-to-face relationship-building skills. This is especially true for younger professionals, who have grown up on a steady diet of online “friends” and connections and are less schooled in the art of face-to-face relationship building.
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WOMENOFCOLOR | SPRING 2020
The ability to build trusted professional relationships should never be left to chance. We must get intentional about learning and practicing the attitudes and skills that allow us to build the 15–25 trusted relationships that matter to our careers. (Contrast this to the hundreds of “surface” online connections people seem obsessed with racking up.) Through 20 years of research and extensive experience working with over 50,000 professionals, I have identified nine attitudes and skills that allow us to build solid, trust-based relationships. In my masterclass, “Building Relationships That Matter,” I teach people how to cultivate them and give very specific tips for implementing them in their day-to-day relationships. If you’re looking for a good New Year’s resolution, here you go: work on boosting your relationship IQ by focusing on these nine attitudes and skills in 2020.
GENEROSITY. If trust is the universal lubricant for relationships, generosity is the fuel that gets them started and keeps them growing. Generosity is the willingness to give freely of your time, expertise, experience, and social capital. In other words, it’s not just about giving money
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