55 Plus of Rochester, #33: May – June 2015

Savvy Senior: Understanding Social Security Lump Sum Payouts Lunch 60 Club Program: Eat, Drink, Interact

55 PLUS Issue 33 May / June 2015

For Active Adults in the Rochester Area

What Is the Best Age to Retire — 62? 66? 70?

LOUISE SLAUGHTER 86-year-old Fairport congresswoman may run for office again in 2016. In an interview with 55 PLUS she talks about politics, life in Washington and more

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CONTENTS 55 PLUS

Savvy Senior: Understanding Social Security Lump Sum Payouts Lunch 60 Club Program: Eat, Drink, Interact

55

55 PLUS

May / June 2015

PLUS Issue 33 May / June 2015

For Active Adults in the Rochester Area

What Is the Best Age to Retire — 62? 66? 70?

LOUISE SLAUGHTER 86-year-old Fairport congresswoman may run for office again in 2016. In an interview with 55 PLUS she talks about politics, life in Washington and more

Priceless

Owners of Genesee Country Inn in Mumford Living the Dream

Why You Should Consider a Family Wealth Trust

Jim Ingutti: Legend of West Irondequoit High School Still Going Strong

20 24 Savvy Senior 6 Financial Health 8 Estate Planning 10 My Turn 18 Addyman’s Corner 34 Long-term Care 40 Profile of Jim Ingutti 45 LAST PAGE Sister Marjory Henninger, founder of Grace of God Recovery House in Rochester, talks about her journey.

4

55 PLUS - May / June 2015

36

roc55.com

39 45

12 ADVENTURE

28 COVER

16 SOCIALIZING

32 ROCK ‘N’ ROLL

20 PRESERVATION

36 CRAFTING

24 THEATER

39 VOLUNTEERING

• Outdoorsman from Rochester raises • Congresswoman Slaughter: Timeless leadership money for charities

• Lunch 60 Club participants break bread, share companionship

• Antique furniture repair businesses add luster to history

• Joan Luther: a lifetime of love and dedication for theater

26 RETIREMENT

• What you should consider before applying for Social Security benefits

• Phil Naro has hit many high notes through illustrious career

• Turning a love of tatting into a social club: Midge’s Tatters.

• Long-time volunteers talk about their job at Rochester General

42 HOSTS

• The Stankevichs, owners of Genesee Country Inn, live the dream

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5

savvy senior

By Jim Miller

T

Social Security Offers Lump Sum Payouts

here are two different kinds of Social Security claiming strategies that can provide retirees a big lump-sum benefit, but you need to be past full retirement age to be eligible, and there are financial drawbacks that you need to be aware of too.

First, let’s review the basics. Remember that while workers can begin drawing their Social Security retirement benefits anytime between ages 62 and 70, full retirement age is currently 66 for those born between 1943 and 1954, but it rises in two-month increments to 67 for those born in 1960 and later. You can find your full retirement age at ssa.gov/pubs/ageincrease.htm.

At full retirement age, you are entitled to 100 percent of your benefits.

If you claim earlier you’ll receive less, while if you delay you’ll get more — roughly 8 percent more for each year until age 70.

Lump Sum Options If you are past full retirement age, and have not yet filed for your benefits, the Social Security Administration offers a retroactive lump-sum payment that’s worth six months of benefits.

Here’s how it works. Let’s say you were planning to delay taking your Social Security benefits past age 66, but you changed your mind at 66 and six months. You could then claim a lump-sum payment equal to those six months of benefits. So, for instance, if your full retirement age benefit were $2,000, you would be entitled to a $12,000 lump sum payment.

If you decided at age 66 and four months that you wanted to file retroactively, you’d get only four months’ worth of benefits in your lump sum, because SSA rules prohibit you from claiming benefits that pre-date your full retirement age.

Another option that provides even more cash is the “file and suspend” strategy. Again, this option is

6

55 PLUS - May / June 2015

only available to people on (or after) full retirement age.

Here’s how this strategy works.

Let’s say you’re 66, and you decide to delay your benefits. You could file for your benefit and then immediately suspend it. This gives you the ability to collect a lump sum going back to the date you filed. So if you need money at age 69 for example, and your full retirement age benefit was $2,000, you could get a three-year lump sum of $72,000.

Drawbacks The big downside to these strategies is that once you accept a lumpsum payment, you’ll lose all the delayed retirement credits you’ve accrued, and your future monthly retirement benefit will be reduced to reflect the amount you already received.

Here’s an example of how this works. Let’s say that you are entitled to a $2,480 monthly benefit at age 69.

By taking a three-year lump sum payment, your future benefits will shrink back to $2,000 per month, which is what you would have received at your full retirement age. This also affects your future survivor benefit to your spouse or other eligible family members after you die.

You also need to consider Uncle Sam. Depending on your income, Social Security benefits may be taxable, and a lump-sum payment could boost the amount of benefits that are taxed. To help you calculate this, see IRS Publication 915 “Social Security and Equivalent Railroad Retirement Benefits” at irs.gov/pub/irs-pdf/ p915.pdf, or call 800-829-3676 and ask them to mail you a copy.

One other caveat: If you’re married and you “file and suspend” your Social Security benefit, you cannot file a “restricted application” too, which gives you the ability to collect spousal benefits while delaying your own retirement benefit past full retirement age.

55PLUS roc55.com

Editor and Publisher Wagner Dotto

Associate Editor Lou Sorendo

Contributing Writers

Deborah J. Sergeant, Ernst Lamothe Jr., John Addyman Lynette Loomis, Renee Rischenole Deborah Blackwell, Mike Costanza

Columnists

Jim Terwilliger, Susan Suben Jim Miller, Bruce Frassinelli Michael Robinson

Advertising

Donna Kimbrell, Marsha Preston H. Mat Adams

Office Manager

Laura J. Beckwith

Layout and Design Chris Crocker

Cover Photo Provided

55 PLUS –A Magazine for Active Adults in the Rochester Area is published six times a year by Local News, Inc., which also publishes In Good Health–Rochester–Genesee Valley’s Healthcare Newspaper.

Health in good

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Mailing Address PO Box 525 Victor, NY 14564 Subscription: $15 a year © 2015 by 55 PLUS – A Magazine for Active Adults in the Rochester Area.

No material may be reproduced in whole or in part from this publication without the express written permission of the publisher.

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How to Reach Us P.O. Box 525 Victor, NY 14564 Voice: 585-421-8109 Fax: 585-421-8129 Editor@roc55.com

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7

financial health

By Jim Terwilliger

More on Charitable Giving

I

n the March-April issue, we discussed the two pockets used to fund charitable giving — ongoing annual gifts from your cash-flow pocket and more substantial gifts from your accumulated assets pocket.

Cash-flow gifts are made during lifetime, while gifts sourced from accumulated assets can be made during lifetime as well as at death.

We earlier described the use of charitable gift annuities, life insurance, and appreciated securities as charitable-giving vehicles. Today, we will explore three additional options.

Gifts from IRAs IRAs are tax-efficient goldmines when it comes to charitable giving.

One approach involves lifetime giving, the other involves a gift at death.

Lifetime: For the past nine years, Congress has allowed taxpayers age 70-1/2 and older to transfer up to $100K annually directly to charities.

Such transfers, known as qualified charitable distributions (QCDs) are treated as non-taxable distributions.

There are several advantages to giving in this manner. Perhaps the greatest benefit is that required minimum distributions (RMDs) may be used to fund these transfers. For folks who do not need their RMDs for household cash flow, such transfers allow both RMD and charitable interests to be satisfied simultaneously; There are a few downsides. QCDs are not allowed for gifts to donor-advised funds. Most notable, the option of making QCDs has not been extended into 2015 or beyond. Congress has been erratic in allowing QCDs, first in four consecutive two-year periods, then most recently in 2014. Stay tuned to see if this benefit is reinstated.

At Death: Naming a charity as beneficiary of an IRA — or 401(k) or other pre-tax account — offers significant tax advantages. Consider a desire to 8

55 PLUS - May / June 2015

leave an estate of cash, appreciated securities, and an IRA to a combination of heirs and charities.

Most folks think of directing the IRA to family members with the remainder split between family and charity. But every dollar distributed to a family member from an inherited IRA is taxed to the family member at ordinary rates. Naming the charity as beneficiary results in no income tax being paid on that portion.

Further, most other assets in the estate receive a stepped-up tax basis at death, resulting in minimal income tax being paid by heirs when these assets are sold.

Charitable Trusts Trusts can be designed and managed in a way that is customized for the donor. A minimum dollar amount to make such a trust worthwhile is in the $100K-$500K range. Such gifts generally are known as split-interest gifts. A portion of the gift is allocated to charity and is tax-deductible. The other non-deductible portion generally is returned ultimately to the donor or the donor’s family.

Charitable Lead Trust: With this instrument, charitable distributions are made annually from the trust. At the end of the term, the trust terminates and the remainder is distributed to heirs as dictated by trust provisions.

Charitable Remainder Trust: This instrument works in the opposite way.

Here, distributions, generally to family members, are made annually. The term can be a fixed number of years (up to 20) or the lifetime of the donor or, say, donor and another family member. At the end of the term, the trust terminates and the remainder is distributed to charity as dictated by trust provisions.

Charitable Foundations The Rochester area is well served

by local foundations that facilitate charitable giving from both pockets.

Two examples are the Rochester Area Community Foundation (RACF) and the Finger Lakes Area Community Endowment (FLACE), managed by Canandaigua National Bank & Trust.

Both are 501(c)(3) charities, so a gift to either qualifies immediately for a charitable tax deduction. Services offered include: Donor-Advised Fund: A gift is made to one’s charitable account at the foundation. The donor then requests cash distributions to desired charities over time. There is no time limit.

Many donors use this fund on an ongoing basis to make annual contributions and distribution requests.

Perpetual Endowment Fund: A gift is made to a managed charitable investment account that is established for a particular charitable purpose.

Typically, cash distributions are made annually to the charities of interest.

Folks might use this to fund an annual scholarship at a school or fulfill a perpetual pledge to an organization that may not have its own endowment fund.

Both organizations accept appreciated securities, making it easy for a donor to make such gifts even though the charities ultimately receiving the gifts might not have the ability to accept securities.

Charitable giving is a complicated topic. Working through the charitable-giving maze is best done in conjunction with a trusted financial planner and other trusted advisers.

James Terwilliger, CFP®, is senior vice president, financial planning manager at Wealth Strategies Group, Canandaigua National Bank & Trust Company. He can be reached at 585-419-0670 ext. 50630 or by email at jterwilliger@cnbank.com.

Social Security

Q&A

Q: I had additional seasonal earnings after my retirement. Will my monthly Social Security retirement benefit increase?

A: Possibly. And, you can get Social Security retirement or survivors benefits and work at the same time. Each year, we review the records for all working Social Security recipients to see if additional earnings may increase their monthly benefit amounts. If an increase is due, we calculate a new benefit amount and pay the increase retroactive to January following the year of earnings. Learn more about how work affects your benefits by reading our publication, “How Work Affects Your Benefits” at www. socialsecurity.gov/pubs.

Q: I need proof that I receive Medicare benefits. Where can I get a letter proving that?

A: If you need proof that you get Social Security benefits, Supplemental Security Income, or Medicare, get an instant benefit verification letter online by using your personal my Social Security account.

If you don’t receive benefits, your letter will serve as proof that you don’t receive benefits. If you recently applied for benefits, the letter will make that clear as well. The information on your benefit verification letter will include information that applies to your situation.

Q: Now that my husband and I have a large family, we’ve hired a housekeeper that comes once a week.

Do we have to withhold Social Security taxes from our housekeeper’s earnings?

A: It depends on how much you’re paying the housekeeper. If you pay a housekeeper or other household worker $1,900 or more in cash wages throughout the year, you must deduct Social Security and Medicare taxes. This holds true for a cleaning person, cook, gardener, babysitter, or anyone else who provides services for you.

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A wonderful tool to provide protection for your beneficiaries

or people who want to retain full control of their assets and still avoid probate, one of the most effective tools is the family wealth trust. Because property in the trust is not considered part of an estate, it does not have to undergo this sometimes lengthy and expensive process. The property is instead administered and distributed by the trustee, according to the specific terms of the trust.

Avoiding probate means not only avoiding hassle and expense, but also saving time. Probate can extend the amount of time before an heir receives an inheritance by months, years — even longer if the will is contested.

Not only can this create hardship among the heirs, but the property in the estate may also suffer. Many assets must be carefully managed to preserve and enhance their value.

Losses may easily occur during this interim period.

There is an emotional price to pay, too. Survivors may be continually reminded of the loss of a loved one as the process drags on. Probate can also lead to loss of privacy. Wills and probate are public matters, whereas a family wealth trust keeps the estate private. Typical probate documents list all assets, appraised value and names of new owners. This information becomes available to marketers, media, creditors and con artists.

If the estate includes real property in more than one state, the process becomes even more complex. An ancillary administration is required to probate out-of-state real estate, which can add to the time, expense and emotional impact of the probate process.

Family wealth trusts are harder to contest than wills. Part of the reason is that trusts usually involve ongoing contacts with bank officials, trustees and others who can later provide solid evidence of the owner’s intentions and mental state. A family

wealth trust that has been in place a long period of time is less likely to be challenged as having been subjected to undue influence or fraud. And because it is a very private document, the terms of the trust might not even be revealed to family members, allowing less opportunity for challenges to its provisions.

A family wealth trust also is a wonderful tool to provide protection for your beneficiaries. An outright distribution of assets even to responsible beneficiaries can put their inheritance at risk to creditors, divorcing spouses and catastrophic medical expense, among other possible calamities. For young, inexperienced, irresponsible or disabled beneficiaries, it is critical that some oversight and management of their inheritance be put in place to protect their inheritance and ensure it will be available for the legitimate purposes you intend.

A family wealth trust provides an efficient, flexible and cost-effective method to put in place the management and protections that are most appropriate to your family situation, overseen by a person or persons you know and trust.

Perhaps best of all, all of this can be accomplished while allowing you to remain in full control of your assets during your lifetime.

While a family wealth trust may not be the best tool in all situations, it is a powerful and flexible approach that best serves the needs of many families.

For over 29 years, The Law Office of Michael Robinson, P.C. has helped thousands of families in the Rochester and Finger Lakes regions protect their legacies. The firm is recognized nationally and locally as an expert resource for estate planning and elder law. Please visit mrobinsonlaw. com or send an email to info@mrobinsonlaw.com. Phone: 585-374-5210

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55+

adventure Rick French celebrates another successful trip up Mt. Kilimanjaro. The head of Pack Paddle Ski regularly takes expeditions up the mountain, while helping climbers raise money for worthy causes.

More a

Than Journey

Outdoorsman raises money for charities

By Mike Constanza

Y

ou might say Rick French enjoys getting away from it all.

“Since 1980, I’ve worked full-time in the outdoors,” says the owner of the expedition company Pack Paddle Ski. “I spend more time in a tent than I do in a house.”

While tramping faraway trails, skiing and climbing mountains around the world, the 57-year-old outdoorsman supports worthy causes.

French acquired a love for the outdoors while growing up in Avon, a community that sits just over 26 miles south of Rochester. As a boy, he sometimes slept in a tent in the back yard of his family’s home.

12

55 PLUS - May / June 2015

“Being inside a house and surrounded by buildings is kind of enclosing,” he says.

Back in 1980, French began turning his desire for rough living into a vocation.

“I worked for outward-boundtype programs, taking troubled youth into the woods,” he explains.

“I worked [for] various programs all over the country.”

Rick’s twin brother, Randy, started PPS in 1984. The next year, Rick joined the firm as co-owner. Based in South Lima, about a half-hour’s drive south of Rochester, the corporation conducts camping, hiking, canoeing, kayaking and skiing trips and expe-

ditions, along with assaults upon the occasional mountain. Rick, who now lives in nearby Livonia, has come to be the business’s sole owner of PPS, which operates with only a few workers and many volunteers.

Down through the decades, Rick has led climbers up Mount Kilimanjaro, backpackers through the Adirondacks, and trekkers across parts of Europe, to name just a few of the kinds of activities his firm has arranged.

After tramping through places near and far, he has developed an almost spiritual view of wild and exotic areas, and a desire to make the world a better place.

“I want to keep every day trying

to find more peace inside,” he says.

“The spinoff of that is often that it contributes benefits to the world.”

PPS seeks to serve both aims.

Though the business operates as a for-profit, its charitable arms are available to assist worthy causes.

Inspirational bond Journeys for Inspiration, for example, is the result of a partnership between PPS and the American Cancer Society. Karen Wozniak learned first-hand how useful that could be back in 2008, when she was in treatment for breast cancer.

“As part of my personal recovery, I wanted to get back into hiking and get back into nature,” explains the 52-year-old Rochester resident.

Wozniak clicked on PPS’s website, and found a notice that the firm planned to take climbers up Tanzania’s Mount Kilimanjaro in 2009.

The trip was set up solely for cancer survivors or the friends or relatives of those who had been taken by the disease. All were using the journey to raise money to fight the disease.

“It was just one of those perfect combinations of things,” she says.

Wozniak signed up for the climb, and began preparing for the difficult journey ahead. Though she’d hiked a bit, the marketing manager for Paychex, Inc. had never attempted anything as challenging as climbing a 19,341-foot mountain in eastern Africa. French, an experienced mountain climber, helped Wozniak and the other adventurous fundraisers prepare for the trip, brought in other veteran climbers to talk to them, checked their equipment and assisted them in other ways. Still, it wasn’t easy.

“Climbing Kilimanjaro was such a physical and emotional challenge,” Wozniak says. “You’re going to a different country and doing something that you’ve never done before, and you really need this emotional, spiritual strength to be able to do something like that.”

After all the preparation and hard work, Wozniak finally stood atop the mountain, where she used French’s satellite telephone to post a verbal message on PPS’s website.

“My family was able to hear my voice when I reached the top,” she says. “I still have that recording.”

Wozniak says her trip garnered just over $5,000, which Journeys for

Inspiration donated to the American Cancer Society. She credits the head of PPS for helping her make the difficult climb.

“I can’t imagine doing it without someone like Rick.”

Since returning to flat land, Wozniak has headed out with PPS again. Last year, she and other hikers followed Rick over 310 miles of the El Camino de Santiago de Compostela, a network of routes that crosses parts of Spain, France and Portugal.

‘Fire in our bellies’ While Wozniak tramped through parts of Europe, Kristine Thompson and her 17-year-old son, Ben, got ready to join another PPS expedition up Kilimanjaro in February 2014.

“We had this fire in our bellies to climb the mountain,” says the 46-year-old Honeoye Falls resident.

The idea wasn’t as much of a stretch for them as it might be for others. Thompson and her family have long enjoyed outdoor activities, and she and Ben have climbed 42 of the Adirondack Mountains’ 46 high peaks.

“We love the Adirondacks,” Thompson explains. “We go there whenever we can.”

French led PPS’s latest Kilimanjaro party on hikes to toughen them up, made sure they had the equipment they needed, and in other ways helped them prepare for the trip. After traveling to Tanzania, the group endured an eight-day trip up the mountain, including the time spent in their base camp acclimating to the cold and thin air. On Feb. 16, they stood atop Kilimanjaro’s peak just as the sun rose.

“The sky was bright blue, and lots of white —white from the snow white from the heavens,” Thompson says.

“It was just a surreal experience.”

Thompson and her son also used the trip to benefit others. After brainstorming with Rick, they came up with the idea of raising funds for Rochester’s Golisano Children’s Hospital. Those wishing to help local kids were able to donate to the hospital’s Jessica Stewart Olin Memorial Fund, which is named after a 5-year-old girl who was taken by a heart ailment about 11 years ago. Jessica’s parents, who live in Victor, are friends of Thompson and her family.

“We wanted to honor her memory,” Thompson says.

While gathering funds for the

Kristine Thompson says she and her son, Ben, “had this fire in our bellies” to climb Kilimanjaro. Last February, they headed to Tanzania to feed that desire. After ascending to the summit, they spent some time sightseeing with their fellow climbers. The Thompson’s trip raised thousands for the Golisano Children’s Hospital.

May / June 2015 - 55 PLUS

13

Love You

Before You Love

55+

adventure

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55 PLUS - May / June 2015

Kristine Thompson and her son, Ben, sightseeing Kilimanjaro National Park with their fellow climbers. treatment of this area’s sick and injured children, Rick and the Thompsons also sought to raise money to help the family of two 7-year-old girls from Moshi. Aziza and Aisha are the twin daughters of Raziki, who regularly cooks for PPS parties that are heading up Kilimanjaro. Families in that part of the world have to pay for their children’s educations, and porters don’t make much. The money would help pay for their schooling.

By the end of February 2014, Thompson and her son had helped bring in over $5,100 in donations for the Jessica Stewart Olin Memorial Fund. Atop that, generous donors had funded the education of Raziki’s twins to the tune of $18,000 —allowing them to attend school for the next 10 years.

Rick has also set out to raise $35,000 to finance the construction of houses for some of the porters who

have served him and his climbers so well down through the years.

“Guys are my age, and with me for 20 years, and they’re still living in one room with five people,” Rick says.

He recently put $10,000 down for the purchase of the land needed for the building of as many as five homes. PPS also helps support two African orphanages.

While such projects are laudable, Rick doesn’t seem to have taken them on to earn the praise of others.

“I don’t think about doing good for the world,” he says. “I think about things that make me come alive, and provide more peace for myself.”

To learn more about Pack Paddle Ski and its charitable efforts, go to http://www.packpaddleski.com.

To donate to the Jessica Stewart Olin Memorial Fund, go to: http:// www.weclimbforkids.org.

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socializing

t c a r e t n I , k Eat, Drin Monroe County high school with the seniors from the Congregate Meal Program for an opportunity to dance, talk and learn from each other.

Lunch 60 Club Program participants break bread, share companionship

By Ernst Lamothe Jr.

W

hen her husband heard about the Lunch 60 Club Program, Arline Pink was game for a social

adventure.

She liked the idea of getting to know people in a group setting and asked, “Why not try something new?”

“At the time, my husband was alive and we enjoyed the delicious meals the program had and every week there was a little dance,” said Pink, 88, of Greece. “My husband and a couple of musicians would come there and play their instruments and we would all just have a great time.”

Administered by the Monroe County Office for the Aging, the Lunch Club 60 Program is a meal initiative for those 60 years and older that dates back to 1972.

It is designed to help seniors enjoy better health through improved

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nutrition and education.

The program features 20 active meal sites throughout Monroe County and serves about 500-600 participants per day.

“I still enjoy being there,” said Pink, who has been part of the program for 30 years. “There is always someone to sit down and talk with.

The sociability makes it feel like family.”

Most locations offer activities and events based on the interests of people who attend. Participation picks up during the warmer summer and fall months, but there are still plenty of people who are not snowbirds and utilize the program during the colder months. This program is provided regardless of participants’ income.

“Offering the Lunch Club 60 helps promote healthy nutrition, socialization, helps seniors in staying

home and reduces isolation,” said Julie Allen Aldrich, Monroe County Office for the Aging director. “This is one way we help older adults and their caregivers in our community.”

Sustained support through federal, state and local funding and contributions from participants and their families allows more access for eligible adults.

While the program is for all older adults, officials do try to target low income, frail, elderly and minority older adults. The suggested contribution is $3 per meal. However, they do suggest a contribution of $6 for individuals with higher incomes.

The program is run through local area senior centers and community centers to complement an array of senior center recreation and wellness activities to improve overall health and wellness.

More than just a meal initiative, Lunch 60 provides various amenities including in-home services, financial management, health insurance information and assistance, kinship care support, caregiver supports, and elder abuse education and prevention.

Aging population grows “We have an ever-growing population of older adults. By 2020, it is estimated that more than 23 percent of the population will be aged 60 and over. That works out to be over 170,000 residents of Monroe County,” said Aldrich. “This program helps maintain and improve the overall health and wellness of older adults, provides respite for caregivers, and is one aspect of allowing older adults the opportunity to continue to live in their community of choice. These programs are not just to send grandma away for the day.”

Many organizations are looking

at how to improve the lives of seniors as well as our boomers. Active programs allow older adults to socially interact, provide civic engagement, work or volunteer.

“It is really important to reduce isolation and it can reduce healthcare costs because the person is happier and participating in their community,” added Aldrich. “By living in their homes, they remain part of the tax base and can contribute to the community’s public services instead of being forced into a much higher-cost nursing home that would deplete their resources. By staying in the community, they give back to the community and have self worth. They can work with our youth, and many can and want to still work or volunteer.”

Pink is also a project council member for the Lunch 60 program.

Her role is helping as a liaison between the seniors and those in charge of the program for the Monroe Coun-

ty Office for the Aging. “Sometimes the debate ranges from the type of programs that seniors would want to see in the future to whether there should be pineapple in the coleslaw.

But ultimately people will like being part of this program,” said Pink.

Aldrich said communities need to reframe the way they think about older adults and ensure that they are not ageist in policies, procedures and businesses.

“Our older adults are a huge asset and should not be thrown away or disrespected,” she added. “They need to be celebrated and supported. We need as a society to go back to core values of family and community and take care of those who have taken care of us.”

For more information on the program, contact your senior center or site or the Office for the Aging at 585753-6280.

Seniors dancing with Monroe County high school seniors at the senior holiday ball.

May / June 2015 - 55 PLUS

17

my turn

By Bruce Frassinelli Email: bruce@roc55.com

My Wife Marie

T

‘The emotional, life-and-death roller coaster we had ridden for nearly three years had ended in sadness and disappointment’

he column I wrote about my wife Marie’s struggle with stage four ovarian cancer in early 2013 was euphoric.

She came through a near-death experience nine months earlier, underwent surgery and, in the fall of 2012, was declared cancer-free.

Shortly after I wrote that article, the cancer returned.

Three months after the good news, in January of 2013, the CA-125 marker, which tracks the presence of cancerous tumors, started to climb, slightly at first, then more rapidly.

When she was first diagnosed on Valentine’s Day 2012, the reading was 10,500 — normal is 35. By mid2014, the reading was more than 4,200, and by Oct. 17, it had gone to more than 11,000, the highest ever. The cancer was spreading exponentially, her oncologist Marie and Bruce Frassinelli

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said. A month later, the number doubled to nearly 23,000. There was nothing more that chemotherapy or modern medicine could do.

Marie had received seven different types of chemotherapy and had been in the hospital for various treatments 14 times over a 34-month period. A second opinion, first from Fox Chase in Philadelphia, then later from Memorial Sloane Kettering Cancer Center in New York, confirmed the findings.

Marie wanted to die at home, so she and the family agreed that the time for hospice care had come.

A hospice representative met with us on Dec. 4, 2014. A month and a day later, on Jan. 5, 2015, Marie took her last breath. She was 72.

The emotional, life-and-death roller coaster we had ridden for nearly three years had ended in

sadness and disappointment.

Now we are left with memories.

There were some poignant moments along the way: When clumps of hair started to fall out from the chemo, Marie asked her son, Mike, on the first day of spring 2012 to cut her hair in our garage. There she was, wrapped in a garbage bag to keep the hair off her clothes, with Mike buzzing her hair as if she were a new military recruit.

Her hair began to grow back after the final original chemo treatments. She bought a wig, but hated it; for awhile, she wore a baseball cap when she went out in public, but then that independent spirit that she had shown through this entire ordeal took hold, and she decided to wear nothing on her head.

It’s funny how that head of frizz became a symbol of her determination to beat this grim reaper. Her grandchildren would rub her head for good luck and laugh, saying it reminded them of a teddy bear.

As we look back on this incredible, improbable odyssey, we are amazed at the support system of family, friends and acquaintances who called, visited, sent letters, flowers, Mass cards, curing oils and other expressions of love, hope and caring.

Her children, brothers, other family members and friends would sit with her for hours, day in and day out during those dark days in the hospital and at home before the end came. They gave reassurance, and, most of all, never gave up hope for a miracle, but there was to be none.

Marie had been on the prayer list of at least a dozen churches in the Oswego area, where we lived for 16 years, and in Pennsylvania.

The daily phone calls and cards

propped up her spirits when she needed it most. Every day when I brought in the mail, she would ask expectantly, “Any cards for me?”

Each day there were at least three or four. The transformation as she read the cards aloud was instantaneous.

We are still in shock that this insidious disease made such quick work of her after it returned with a vengeance.

When we were told in the fall of 2012 that Marie was cancer-free, we vowed that we would never take a day, even a minute, of our lives for granted again. We knew there was a possibility that this would happen, that life is fragile and given to us for an undetermined period of time. We cherished her for a little more than two years after we had received that good news. The oncologist thought she had five to eight years, maybe more, but the villainous cancer had other ideas.

Marie’s goal was to make it to Christmas Eve, a traditional event at our home where we celebrate the feast of the Seven Fishes and 13 Dishes. Twenty family members gathered, and although Marie could not prepare any of the dishes, as she had done typically, she supervised the event, chopped some vegetables and even ate a little of the meal.

Afterward, we opened gifts, and she read love letters from her sons, her grandchildren, her brothers and me. We all wanted her to know how much we loved her, how much she has meant to us and how we will always cherish her memory because of the way she had touched us in so many special ways.

Tears flowed endlessly during this very emotional evening. We knew it was to be the last group farewell, and we made the most of it.

Marie’s legacy will be the determination and grace she showed in the face of unspeakable pain and suffering. On those rare occasions when it appeared as if she could not go on, she remembered the legion of supporters who were counting on her to rise above the discomfort and live as normal a life as possible.

When she did this, her voice got stronger, her eyes sparkled, her smile returned. She was back in battle mode. She fought the best fight, right up until the end.

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preservation

Furnishing T Tradition Antique furniture repair businesses add luster to history

By Lynette Loomis

Mary Tichenor established Tichenor Furniture Services in Honeoye Falls in 1958. She continues to operate this unique enterprise which repairs family heirlooms and museum pieces including furniture, statues, clocks, lamps and artwork. Clients have included the White House, Philadelphia Museum of Art, Strong Museum, Granger House, Genesee Country Museum, George Eastman House and the Genesee Valley Club.

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he generation referred to as the baby boomers grew up when toasters were fixed, not thrown out, and planned obsolescence was unheard of.

A door was sanded and repainted and its screen was repaired or replaced. A piece of furniture was handed down to the next generation along with a story. Then there was a reversal of interest in things from the past and an increased desire for everything “new.”

Cheaper goods were available and craftsmanship was less valued than cost. The country began to think, “Well, if it breaks, I’ll just buy a new one.” Enter the big American trashcan, the landfill. More boomers and other generations are thinking “green” and finding interesting and responsible ways to reuse things from the past.

In the heart of Honeoye Falls is a Rochester landmark in the field of antique furniture repair, Tichenor Furniture Services.

Paul Tichenor, a master cabinetmaker who studied at the Henry Ford Museum, established the business in 1958.

Mary Tichenor continues to operate this unique enterprise which repairs family heirlooms and museum pieces including furniture, statues, clocks, lamps and artwork.

Clients have included the White House, Philadelphia Museum of Art, Strong Museum, Granger House, Genesee Country Museum, George Eastman House and the Genesee Valley Club.

The business has had Monet and Renoir paintings in the shop for repair.

“You can learn a lot not only about craftsmanship and history but also the personality of some of the owners. We repaired a chair owned by George Eastman and found that he had a habit of putting his used gum under the arms of the chair,” Tichenor said. “Or we have seen young love expressed by initials carved in a piece. If we find a letter taped to the underside of a drawer, we always return it

In the heart of Honeoye Falls is a Rochester landmark in the field of antique furniture repair, Tichenor Furniture Services. It has had Monet and Renoir paintings in the shop for repair and clients include the White House and the Philadelphia Museum of Art. to the owner, unread of course.”

One of the more challenging pieces Tichenor’s has repaired was a 10-foot statue of Jesus that had been damaged during transport.

The left-hand fingers were broken off and the repair special material from the Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York City.

Another delicate repair was a painting by 19th-century Artist W. Langley.

“There was a small hole in the canvas and some water damage which we repaired and we restored the gold leaf frame to its original beauty,” said Tichenor.

When Paul Tichenor passed away in 2009, some people worried that the business would close.

But Mary, who had worked in the business for 30 years, did not hesitate to continue her husband’s legacy.

“We had 10 employees who counted on us, and two and three generations of families who entrusted their most precious memories with us. Of course we would continue,” she said.

Jim Trott, senior finisher, has worked at Tichenor’s for 40 years.

“It’s a wonderful feeling to be able restore either the beauty or functionality of a piece. When some people come to us, they are very worried that a family heirloom has been ruined, or a precious museum piece cannot be restored,” he said.

“When they see the final result, our team shares a sense of pride that our craftsmanship has been appreciated.

I think this is what any artist values.”

Charlie Symington is a third-generation customer of

Jim Trott, senior finisher, has worked at Tichenor’s for 40 years. “It’s a wonderful feeling to be able restore either the beauty or functionality of a piece,” he says.

Tichenor Furniture Services.

“My parents and grandparents appreciated their family heirlooms and used Tichenor’s on a regular basis to refinish old treasures and upholster worn out chairs,” he said.

“I can’t say that I really appreciated their work as a child, but when I moved back to Rochester a few years ago, I had more than a dozen recently inherited pieces of furniture in great need of repair and refinishing.”

The most notable was the restoration of a massive 10-foothigh grandfather clock that belonged to his great-grandfa-

ther, Thomas W. Finucane.

“It is wonderful to be able to see this beautiful clock restored. It and many other pieces saved by Tichenor’s fill my house in Brighton.

I think having older pieces gives one a sense of continuity, a connection to our past,” Symington said.

The ReStore story Kevin Duhamel has always enjoyed doing projects around his home, so after retiring from JPMorgan Chase, the opportunity to work on building a Habitat for Humanity house sounded like May / June 2015 - 55 PLUS

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preservation

the perfect volunteer project.

“I was looking for some way to volunteer that wasn’t at a desk.

I liked the philosophy of Habitat for Humanity: Everyone, everywhere, should have a healthy, affordable place to call home. I also liked the idea that families helped themselves,” Duhamel said.

For six years, he helped to build houses. A knee surgery made it impossible for him to work on site building houses, but then Habitat opened a ReStore in the Rochester Public Market.

The ReStore is a retail store open to the general public that sells both new and used building supplies and household items.

Proceeds go to building additional Habitat homes in Rochester.

“For eight years, I worked at the store and called on commercial businesses to donate extra building supplies,” he said.

Linda Hall has been a lifelong repurposer and has furnished much of her Adirondack home with treasures found at ReStore, including mission oak furnishings and lighting fixtures.

Kevin Duhamel shows one of the many new or mint-condition sinks at ReStore. He chairs the ReStore committee and all proceeds benefit Habitat for Humanity.

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He has chaired the ReStore committee for the past six years and served on the Habitat board for the same period.

Duhamel said donating building materials, cabinets, sinks and furniture is a great thing to do.

“I am increasingly conscious of the need for our community to ‘go green’ whenever possible. We need to reuse things and not stock our landfills with materials and furniture that could be used by someone else,” he said. “Many people cannot afford to buy a new kitchen, so buying their cabinets or appliances from ReStore makes good economic sense.”

Duhamel said many times, contractors will encourage a home owner who is updating a room to donate their older furnishings to ReStore.

“We have five paid staff at ReStore and five volunteers any one time. To a person, each of us

appreciates helping someone move forward to improve their life,” he said. “Other customers come into the store to find treasures as well. The money they spend on used furniture, flooring, lighting or whatever goes to help Habitat build homes. Everyone benefits.”

Linda Hall is an example of a person who appreciates previously owned materials.

“I have been a ‘repurposer’ since I was very young. I believe we can save the environment by reusing, repurposing and recycling,” she said. “I am a regular customer of ReStore. I have found mission lamps, outdoor lanterns and an Adirondack-designed hanging lamp, sinks, faucets, cabinets and knobs, and a dry sink. I also have been delighted with the flooring we have repurposed, including hardwoods, porcelain, ceramic tile and margoleum.”

Hall said she has used an entire set of previously used windows for her Adirondack room and a large trapezoid window for an Adirondack forest view.

“Not to mention all of these finds and 10 new replacement doors,” she added.

Much of her Adirondack home has been furnished with products from ReStore, including a mission cherry couch and chair, a mission table, shelving as well as lighting and chairs.

“Clearly, we have renovated much of our Adirondack home with purchases from the ReStore.

We like the character repurposed materials give our home and the hunt for treasures is part of the fun,” she said. “For us, the quality of the materials we have found — the craftsmanship, durability and beauty — could not have made better purchases and the thrill of finding so many perfect items, at the right price, has pleased us greatly.

“Knowing that these materials are being reused and not discarded and that the proceeds from our purchases help local families also is a great feeling. “ We will continue to shop at the ReStore to support their mission and to complete the many projects we have under way.”

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theater Joan Luther, 67, offers her home in the Village of Naples to artists from all over the country, who come to Naples to perform throughout the summer season at Bristol Valley Theater. Luther is an active member of the community, both in theater and with politics. She makes voodoo dolls in her spare time and donates the proceeds to charity, and she also referees volleyball games in Bloomfield.

All the World’s a Stage Joan Luther: a lifetime of love and dedication for theater in the heart of the Finger Lakes

By Deborah Blackwell

I

t’s been said by those who have it, when the theater bug is in your blood, it becomes part of you.

No one has it more than Joan Luther, 67, of Naples, who for more than 40 years has been part of Upstate New York’s theater scene in more ways than one.

Luther has seen it all. She began as a technical apprentice in her youth, followed by years of active involvement in Bristol Valley Theater. Not only a mentor and friend, she houses the actors and technicians that come to Naples for summer productions at the playhouse. She is also an adjudi24

55 PLUS - May / June 2015

cator for the Theater Association of New York State.

“Being a technical theater person early on, I had to wait during rehearsals to do what needed to be done, so I spent a lot of time just watching,” says Luther. “That is where I began to learn many aspects of the theater. I was waiting and watching and learning, and that’s how I got a lot of my background.”

Luther began as an apprentice at Bristol Valley Theater in Naples in 1966 at age 18. Then called Bristol Valley Playhouse, a high school art teacher encouraged Luther to take a

job there to help sew costumes. The theater was just two years old at the time.

“When I graduated from high school, I took the summer job as an apprentice and I learned a trade in the technical aspect of the theater.

So you can imagine how much it has changed over the years,” says Luther.

“I worked there when I was young, then after I married and had children, I went back to the theater again so I could learn more.”

She made her living for 25 years working for the Ontario County Board of Elections in Canandaigua,

but while living in the village of Naples, kept her connections to the Bristol Valley Theater. This summer theater in the heart of the Finger Lakes offers a wide variety of plays and musicals. More than 90 percent of the artists who perform there are professional actors from all over the United States.

The artists and technicians who come for summer productions need a place to stay, and Luther hosts them at her village home. Depending on the production and cast size, some come for three weeks while others stay the whole summer.

“I have had many people come in and out of here. It’s an entirely different kind of living. It’s country living at its finest,” says Luther. “They can walk into the village, get a meal at the tavern, see a show, and play “Trivial Pursuit” on the porch. They think they’ve died and gone to heaven.”

She stays in touch with many of her guests, some she met 20 years ago. She finds hosting interesting and works hard to make their stay memorable.

“I cannot count the number of evenings I spent just sitting with Joan on her porch or at her kitchen table listening to her share stories and exchange ideas,” says David Shane, associate artistic director, Bristol Valley Theater. “I’m so grateful that over the years I’ve been able to count on her support not only as a patron of the theater, but also as one of my nearest and dearest friends.”

‘One of my anchors’ Shane stayed with Luther for some part of every summer for six years when he was a summer season actor and director before moving to Naples permanently to become the associate artistic director at Bristol Valley Theater.

“Joan is one of my anchors that has always taken in artists and encourages her friends. She has formed lifelong friendships with the folks who have stayed with her,” says Karin Bowersock, artistic director, Bristol Valley Theater.

Luther’s stories are legendary, according to Bowersock, who invited Luther to speak at the Bristol Valley Theater Storytelling Series.

Like the time she rented her house to 13 French-Canadian hunters who did not speak much English. She

said two men came to look at the house first, and said they would like to stay there, but when they arrived, they had 11 other men with them.

Luther moved all of her antiques into a separate part of the house and had to make room for their hunted deer in the garage. She says it was one of more interesting rental experiences she has had.

Luther’s nearly lifelong affiliation with theater led her to her another professional endeavor, adjudicating for TANYS since 2003. TANYS supports community theater at the high school and college levels, as well as children’s theater and nonprofessional community theater.

Luther adjudicates across New York and other states. She reads the scripts, watches the productions, takes notes, then talks with the cast and crew about what she saw, what can be improved and how well the show works.

“I travel up and down the East coast for this. You see can some wonderful shows and meet interesting people,” says Luther. “The fact that they bring live theater to a small community is Joan Luther announces awards during a banquet with the Theater Association of New delightful.”

Once a year, TANYS York State (TANYS), last November in Auburn. holds a state festival and invites between eight and 10 verse and her energy is unmatched.” shows.

In her spare time, Luther is presiThere is also a national festival put on by the American Association dent of the library board, on the town of Community Theaters that hosts planning board, town zoning board people from all over the world, ac- of appeals, works with the local food cording to Luther. In 2011, TANYS pantry, and is a volleyball referee at hosted a national festival in Rochester a local bar in Bloomfield from May and 12 shows from across the country through October.

Mother to two grown children competed at GEVA Theater Center.

One of her newer pastimes, Lu- and three grandchildren, Luther’s ther now makes handmade voodoo theater bug was passed on. Her son dolls and donates the profits to TA- is a professor of set design and is in theater production at the University NYS. “Joan is incredibly civic-mind- of Minnesota.

“My love of adjudicating stems ed, dedicating countless amounts of time and energy to the betterment of from my 40 years of theater, launched her community and to organizations when I was an apprentice at Bristol that do the same,” says Shane. “She Valley Playhouse in 1966,” says Luis as passionate about the arts as she ther. “I have a deep admiration for is about community service and poli- the theater. It becomes your second tics on the whole. Her interests are di- family.”

May / June 2015 - 55 PLUS

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retirement

When to Retire?

Experts: what you should consider before applying for Social Security benefits

By Deborah Jeanne Sergeant

S

hould you collect Social Security early or wait until 70? It may seem an easy question to answer, but it’s actually a lot more complicated.

“It’s pretty commonplace that people simply collect Social Security at age 62, the earliest they can take retirement, and sign up without knowing the ramifications,” said Keith Splain, financial adviser and managing partner with William Warren Associates in Rochester.

“They do it just because they can but it’s usually not a good decision to do so.”

As for his own situation, Splain,

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56, says he doesn’t plan to take early Social Security. As he approaches retirement age, it’s a decision he’s mulling over these days.

“Based on my income needs, I see no reason to take it early,” Splain said. “But each person is different.”

Waiting until 70 can significantly raise his Social Security income, he and other financial advisers say.

Though the “full retirement” age ranges from 65 to 67, taking it as early as 60 — for qualifying widows and widowers — means receiving less overall. If you wait until 70, you’ll end up with 32 percent more total income, which offers a nice incentive

to wait, “That’s the best way to go if you have enough income coming from pensions, 401ks and other investments,” Splain said.

For others, taking the benefit earlier makes more sense.

“Longevity and health issues are a concern,” Splain said. “If someone has a serious illness and their expected lifespan is short, they may want to take it early.”

Consider family health history and your current health, he advises.

Ron Cupello, financial adviser with Cupello Financial Services in RochHendee ester, talks with clients about their financial needs and goals for retirement.

“They need to look at their bills and know if they want the maximum benefit,” Cupello said. “They also need to look at their investments. If

they retire early, they may need to dip into their savings.”

If you’re still working, your retirement will be easier if you “maximize your income and get rid of all the debt you have, whether charge cards or mortgage or car payments,” Cupello said.

That way, your retirement budget won’t have to spread so far.

Doug Hendee, certified financial planner with Brighton Securities Corporation in Rochester, doesn’t measure when one should retire solely on the numbers.

“From a psychological, quality of life perspective, if you keep waiting and retire when you’re 70 and die when you’re 71, you probably should have taken early Splain retirement,” he said. “It’s not always about the money. If you can’t stand your job and it wears on you from a health perspec-

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Is it worth working longer? Is three more years of hating your job every single day worth it? That’s a tough thing to quantify.”

Jim Terwilliger, certified financial planner with Canandaigua National Bank & Trust in Pittsford and a contributor to 55 PLUS, advises couples to plan on enough retirement income on the basis of at least one of the spouses living to age 95, which isn’t uncommon anymore.

Since numerous claiming options exist based upon age and marital status, talk with a qualified financial adviser before making changes to your retirement plans.

Terwilliger said that some financial advisers “are ignorant” as to how Social Security benefits work.

“It’s critical that someone anticipating retirement talks with a financial planner who’s knowledgeable about the subject and I’m not talking about investment advisers. They aren’t necessarily fully versed on it.

“Find advisers who charge on a fee basis, not on selling products on commission,” Terwilliger said.

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cover

Timeless Leadership U.S. Congresswoman Dorothy Louise Slaughter wears Rochester on sleeve

By Ernst Lamothe Jr.

I

t never gets easier. But it was never really easy to begin with.

Dorothy Louise Slaughter knew this the first minute she considered running for political office and it was a friendly reminder this past fall when she narrowly defeated her latest challenger.

Representing the 25th Congressional District of New York — which includes Monroe County — Slaughter was first elected to the U.S. Congress in 1986.

Today, the Fairport resident is now serving her 15th consecutive term in the House of Representatives after her hard-fought battle against Gates Town Supervisor Mark Assini, the Republican challenger who was defeated by 869 votes. The last time she won by such a narrow margin was her first victory in 1986 when she defeated incumbent Fred J. Eckert.

“I was nervous about it. I was worried about low voter turnout which is exactly what happened,” said Slaughter.

Her career has been marked by many landmark votes, taking the lead in several historic initiatives as well as being the first woman to chair the House Committee on Rules in 2007.

Now at 85, she reflects on a long28

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standing career of being a pioneer lawmaker, a dedicated wife, a diligent mother of three daughters, a caring grandmother of seven grandchildren and a strong woman in the midst of what is still considered a male-dominated profession.

“I was never shy about speaking my mind,” said Slaughter. “When you have a passion for something, you shouldn’t stay quiet.”

Champion of science, health Born in Harlan County, Ky., and possessing her signature Southern drawl, Slaughter entered Congress in January 1987. The daughter of a coal miner, the family moved to Monticello, Ky. where Slaughter attended high school.

As the only microbiologist in Congress — she received her Bachelor of Science degree at the University of Kentucky — Slaughter has led the charge in addressing major science and health-related issues.

At the University of Kentucky, she was a singer in a jazz-swing band and continues to enjoy local live music today. But also during that time, she began forging her thoughts on science and health.

After graduate school, she went

to work for Procter & Gamble in New York doing market research. But soon, there was a push toward politics.

“I was born with perseverance.

Sometimes I think it was my mountain genes that makes me as tough as I am,” said Slaughter.

She has always been passionate about health-related issues, both as a mother and microbiologist. She fought for research into an anti-miscarriage drug that provided devastating health consequences to mother and their unborn children exposed in utero.

Then she led the charge in breast cancer research. For decades, she worked to secure grant money for the National Institutes of Health. In 1993, that became a reality with a $500 million grant dedicated to breast cancer research.

The Office of Research on Women’s Health named her visionary for women’s health research.

Latest reports say about 232,340 new cases of invasive breast cancer are expected to be diagnosed among U.S. women, according to the American Cancer Society. An estimated 40,000 women will die this year from the disease.

“All the research work was be-

Photo Congresswoman Louise Slaughter being recognized in 2014 by the Humane Society’s Legislative Leader Award for her work on animal rights and welfare. ing done on white men when women were the majority in the country.

We couldn’t afford for research on breast cancer to be so sporadic, not to mention that none was being done on ovarian cancer,” said Slaughter.

She has been a champion for science and art throughout the community.

“Congresswoman Slaughter’s understanding and focus on the importance of science and technology to the regional economy and passionate support of the importance of arts is critically important to our community,” said Kate Bennett, president of the Rochester Museum & Science Center.

“She has brought great benefits and resources to our workforce development opportunities and to our quality of life. Her commitment is a force for good in the greater Rochester region.”

One of her signature accomplish-

ments in Congress was leading the effort for the Genetic Information and Non-Discrimination Act, which prevents health insurance companies from revoking an individual’s insurance or being terminated based upon genetic information.

“Senator Ted Kennedy at the time called it the first civil rights bill of the 21st century,” said Slaughter.

Champion of the military Five years ago, her focus turned to protecting the men and women who served in Afghanistan and Iraq.

In tough terrain and in a foreign area, there were many unknowns fighting in the Middle East. But a surprising unknown was the lack of quality equipment the soldiers had.

“At that time, I was so angry that I could hardly speak of it,” Slaughter said. “Our soldiers should have the

best equipment available to them.”

She persuaded the Department of Defense to recall 16,000 pieces of body armor and replace them with safer armor. At that time, the inspector gen-

Interests Outside Congress As a member of Congress, Louise Slaughter doesn’t have much spare time. However, she does have a few interests. She has been a longtime fan of the Campbell Brothers, a well-known gospel-blues-jam band. She also loves reading any newspaper she can get her hand on, catching up on the television show “Homeland,” and cooking. Her potato salad, whiskey cake and pot roast are all specialties.

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New York’s bipartisan Upstate delegation gathers in Washington, D.C., before the State of the Union address Jan. 20. eral found the Army failed to follow federal contracting rules in procuring armor and contracts.

“When I heard that a large percentage of soldiers killed in Iraq could have survived if they had proper body armor, I couldn’t believe it. It took years to get action for something to happen,” Slaughter said.

“One day I ran into a Marine when I was doing a press conference for something else in the Rochester area and he came to me and said it never would have occurred to him that a woman from his hometown would be the one to get things done.

We didn’t give up and good things happen when you don’t give up.”

Champion for Monroe County Slaughter deeply cares about areas in Monroe County.

She remembers fighting for a little piece of wooded land in Fairport that later turned out to be on the national landmark list. Rochester, which is 30

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known for many things including its arts, benefited from more than $1 million in grants through the National Endowment for the Arts and National Endowment for the Humanities.

“Investing in the arts and humanities is not only critical to stimulating creativity and imagination in our society, but it also energizes our economy,” added Slaughter. “I am so proud of our local arts community which helps make Rochester a terrific place to live, work and learn.”

She also has pushed for economic, science and education advances in Rochester.

“Louise is a great champion for scientific research and for higher education. She understands both and the benefits that they bring both to the Rochester area and to society generally,” said Joel Seligman, president of the University of Rochester. “When an issue arises, she takes it head on.

She’s a delight to work with and is simply sharp, knowledgeable, tena-

cious and personable. I’m glad she’s our representative, and I’m happy to call her my friend.”

Champion of speaking her mind Previously, being part of the House Rules Committee helped bring the Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act law to the forefront and eventually through the finish line. It is the most expansive health care law in almost half a century. It is something several presidents attempted and failed or decided simply not to attempt because of the sheer measure of passing such a nationwide law.

Now, the Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act, called Obamacare, has transformed how hospitals nationwide do business.

No longer are they focused primarily on inpatient, but now the shift is to outpatient and the preventive care of population health by offering high-quality services while cutting cost.

The shift has pushed many hospitals into merging so they can offer quality of care with federal reimbursement tied to just that — patient satisfaction.

“I’m proud of what we did there.

It definitely wasn’t easy,” said Slaughter.

In addition, President Barack Obama signed an executive order on immigration. The order cracked down on illegal immigration at the border focusing on deporting undocumented people who recently crossed the border.

It requires undocumented families who have been here for five years or longer to pass a background check and pay back taxes while they stay in the U.S. The move was applauded by Slaughter.

“The president’s action takes a number of bold steps toward fixing our broken immigration system,” she said. “This program would provide relief from deportation for a period of three years, but immigrants under this program would not be eligible for certain federal benefits such as health coverage obtained through the Affordable Care Act.” She also agreed with the executive order that expanded protection for children brought to the U.S. through no fault of their own to have

access to college education and contribute to society.

“President Obama is well within his constitutional bounds to act on immigration,” added Slaughter. “Every single president since Dwight Eisenhower, including Ronald Reagan and George H.W. Bush, has taken executive action on immigration.”

But whether you agree with her or not, Slaughter is not simply going to tell you what you want to hear. She has been critical of Republicans and how they have handled their Congressional responsibilities. She also hasn’t shied away from criticizing her own party all the way up to the White House.

“There are a lot of things that trouble me and I think there was a lack of leadership from the White House. There needed to be a clearer message because people don’t understand who are on their side,” said Slaughter. “There are things that both sides are not doing well that people don’t like.”

But while she was excited about the continued push of the Affordable Care Act and the new immigration law, last year also had some heartbreaking elements.

She spoke about the death of Robert Slaughter, her husband of 57 years.

The couple met in Texas while she

worked for a chemicals manufacturer.

After getting married, they moved to Fairport. He was a legal administrator for Rochester-based Eastman Kodak, a company that family members hold dear to their hearts.

“When I joined Kodak, one of the first people to welcome me to the job was Congresswoman Slaughter,” said Jeff Clarke, chief executive officer of Kodak. “We spoke at length about the rich history of Kodak in our community and our shared commitment to maintaining the Kodak brand. When she left my office, she told me to contact her for any reason, both big and small, because Kodak is close to her heart. The Congresswoman meant what she said and ever since she has demonstrated her support for Kodak employees time and time again.”

Slaughter once again pushed forward with the strength of her family and friends to continue working in government and winning her re-election last fall.

“The great thing about Congress is that we can positively affect people’s lives in so many ways,” she said.

“This is something that I want to continue to do for years to come. I put in 14-hour days and I don’t take a nap either. I am blessed to be able to do this job and have people trust me. I plan to do this as long as I can.”

Running Again in 2016?

Even though Congresswoman Louise Slaughter has yet to confirm the news, there have been rumors that she has decided to run again next year, according to a Democrat and Chronicle report.

If Slaughter, 86, of Fairport does run, it would make her the state’s longest-serving House member.

There are four other House members who are over the age of 80: Don Young, 81, representative from Alaska; Sander Levin, 83, and John Conyers, 85, both from Michigan; and Sam Johnson, 84, of Texas.

Slaughter will turn 87 three months before the 2016 election.

According to the Democrat and Chronicle, Slaughter and her allies in Congress are already sending emails requesting donations to-

ward her bid. “Louise won by just 869 votes last year, attracting the attention of [House] Speaker [John Boehner and every mega tea party donor across America,” House Democratic Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi reported as saying in an email to potential donors.

Mark Assini, the town of Gates supervisor, is the Republican candidate that will likely challenger her next year.

“God willing and with support of my family and friends, I plan on running again in 2016,” Assini said in an email to the Democrat and Chronicle. “It is still my firm belief that you can’t fix Congress with the same people who broke it to begin with. Term limits and reaching across the aisle on critical issues is

the key to positive, lasting change.”

For now, Slaughter is focused on her job, which recently included working with fellow Congress members Richard Hanna, Paul Tonko, John Katko and Tom Reed to introduce legislation to reauthorize the National Women’s Right History Project.

The act was signed into law in 2009 after nearly a decade of work

by Slaughter and former New York Senator Hillary Clinton. It focused on supporting and promoting the efforts of the women’s right movement in Upstate New York and throughout the country. Reauthorization is a critical step in securing funds.

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music

k c Ro ! n O Rochester musician has hit many high notes through illustrious career

By Renee Rischenole

M

any famous musicians began their career from their hometown of Rochester, a city known for its rich musical legacy.

Some notable names that many may recall are Cab Calloway, Chuck Mangione and Lou Gramm among many others, including Phil Naro, an Emmy award-winning singer, songwriter and producer.

Naro’s roots began in Rochester and so did his professional music career. In 1973, the 15-year-old sophomore attending East Ridge High made the move from amateur to professional when he performed with a

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band called Stormbreaker.

It played around the Rochester area but when the band broke up, he joined another high school band called Olias.

Olias performed across Upstate New York and one of its favorite places to perform was at the Penny Arcade near Charlotte Beach.

After Olias disbanded, Naro began auditioning for other bands around the country. He traveled on a Greyhound bus to Maine, Boston, New York, Cleveland and all the way to Los Angeles but without any success.

“One day I picked up a newspa-

per called The Toronto Star and answered an ad for a band looking for a singer,” Naro said.

In 1979, Naro packed his belongings and moved to Toronto to join the band Chain Reaction. The band performed on four tours across Canada and released two albums under Attic Records. It was together until 1981.

After the band parted ways, in 1982 Naro moved back to Rochester to join the local band Saas and performed around Upstate New York.

“While at one of our concerts, Billy Sheehan stopped out to see me perform and asked me to play with him in Talas, which was a Buffalo-based

band,” Naro said.

For three years, Talas toured the United States and Canada for 365 days a year but when the band broke up, Naro moved back to Toronto to play with a few bands there.

Brush with a legend Naro had then received a call from Peter Criss, the drummer for the hard rock band KISS, to join his band for a project in Los Angeles.

After completion of the project, Naro briefly moved back to Rochester for about six or seven months spending some time there until moving back to Toronto for good. It was then that Naro began performing in an acoustic duo called The Phil and John Show that he continues to be a part of (www.thephilandjohnshow.com).

The duo plays cover songs six nights a week at different pubs around the Ontario area.

“We’ve been playing for 17 years.

It’s what keeps me the busiest,” Naro said.

Indeed he has been busy. Naro is also a member of two bands, DDrive and Druckfarben. DDrive is a rock band based out of Rochester and Druckfarben is a progressive rock band based out of Toronto.

“I manage my time really well,” Naro replied when asked how he does it all.

Although Naro has been living in Toronto for 27 years, he continues to have ties to Rochester, not only because of his band but family as well.

Naro was born and raised in Rochester. He grew up in the Irondequoit area with his parents and brother. As a child he didn’t realize he wanted to be a musician even though he would sing a lot around his house.

ished into a professional career.

Although Naro lives in Toronto these days, he continues to travel back and forth to Rochester at least 10 times a month for recordings, rehearsals and performances with his band DDrive.

Currently working on its fourth CD, DDrive plays shows at different locations around the Rochester area.

It has two upcoming performances. The first one is June 23 at the Jazz Festival and the other is Aug. 22 with location to be announced.

Naro will also be performing a solo at the Scotland Yard Pub, downtown Rochester.

While in Rochester, Naro spends time with his family and he enjoys going to the clubs to see local talent.

Some of his favorite restaurants are Benucci’s Italian Restaurant, Ricci’s Family Restaurant, Sips Coffee and Café and the Scotland Yard Pub. He had a recent performance with the House of Guitars All Star Band at the 2014 Rochester Music Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony where once again he had the opportunity to work with Gramm.

“Even though I live in Toronto, my heart still belongs in Rochester, where it all began,” Naro said.

In 2008, Naro also received the Daytime Entertainment Emmy Award for singing the theme song for the cartoon, “6Teen.”

Naro features a website at www. philnaro.com.

Family influences “My mom and dad would sing at home, nothing professionally,” said Naro. “They always had the Italian music playing.”

It wasn’t until he was around 10 years old when he was exposed to professional singing while tagging along with his Uncle Santo. Naro’s uncle was a singer and played the guitar for wedding gigs and Naro would observe.

“I thought he was the coolest guy because he looked like Elvis,” Naro said.

Five years later, his talents flour-

Phil Naro, an Emmy award-winning singer, songwriter and producer, has roots in Rochester.

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addyman’s corner

By John Addyman

You Don’t Have To Look In The Mirror To See Your Genes

D

o you remember the first time you came face-to-face with your genes?

My moment came a dozen years ago, when my youngest daughter, Mary Kate, was in her late teens.

She was having a tough time with friends and future and college.

We started to have a father-daughter discussion, and pretty soon, we were yelling at each other, despite both of our efforts not to do that.

I paused and told her she was doing to me almost exactly what I had done to my parents a long time ago — arguing passionately.

What she said next stunned me.

“Dad, I AM you!”

Hello, genes…

After that, I kind of got used to having my kids pointing out that one weird thing or another they did was entirely my fault and they had no control over it.

But on a recent Saturday morning, I got reintroduced to the meetyour-genes concept all over again.

Some background: my wife and I love garage sales. We collect things. My son-in-law, Chad, puts it a little differently — he says we are practicing hoarders.

I’ve collected records for 50 years. I have large cookbook and DVD movie libraries. I love Santa Claus cookie jars and antique flour sifters and glass juicers. My wife, Gayle, collects snowmen cookie jars, and since she redecorates the house by season — she is always looking for Easter, Christmas, Thanksgiving, Valentine’s Day, Fourth of July, fall, winter, spring and summer ephemera and gee-gaws.

Maybe my son-in-law is right…

Anyway, the grandchildren like to go to garage sales and flea markets

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with us. And over the years, Jaden, 8, and Jeremy, 6, have learned how to bargain and they do it quite well.

Granddaughter Lucie, 9, still hasn’t acquired the art and, like her dad, tends to buy very little if anything on what my wife calls our “junking” Saturdays.

Last weekend, we were making our rounds, and we stopped in Goldy’s Goodies in Palmyra. I bought some records and a metal pan. Lucie looked at the jewelry but nothing tickled her fancy.

Jeremy, however, had locked onto something. I stood there shaking my head as he said he wanted to buy it, tugging on my arm all the while.

On the shelf in front of us was an old Royal standard typewriter, an Office Master model, I think, with a wide carriage, the kind you’d find in an accounts receivables office more than 50 years ago. Big, metal, heavy-duty.

It weighed about half of what Jeremy

weighs.

“I want it,” my grandson said.

“What will you do with it?” I asked.

He gave me that you’re-a-sillygranddad-to-ask-me-that-question look.

“I’m going to type on it, of course,” Jeremy said. “That’s what it’s for.”

The thing had no ribbon, and it was $10.

“It’s a lot of money for a boat anchor,” I told him. Jeremy didn’t understand the boat anchor reference.

“Can I bargain for the typewriter?” he asked.

“Go right ahead.”

Jeremy walked over to the man in the store and asked if he could buy the typewriter for $5.

“What are you going to do with a typewriter?” the man asked Jeremy.

“Do you have a boat?”

Jeremy didn’t give him the same

look he gave me, but turned on the little-waif-who-wants-a-typewritermore-than-anything-in-the-world face. Once the shopkeeper realized Jeremy was serious and realized he could part with the typewriter in the next three minutes, the deal was made.

“Would you carry the typewriter out to the car?” Jeremy asked me.

“And do you have $5? I didn’t bring any money.”

I told Jeremy I had used a typewriter very similar to this one, but a little older — an Underwood Model 10 — when I took my first job as a sports writer for a newspaper in West Chester, Pa, many, many years ago. I started to explain how the typewriter works, but he stopped me.

Jeremy’s hands were in front of him, like he was typing in air, showing me how the typewriter worked.

“I know,” he said.

He was looking at me like he really did know. And he flashed his goofy, I-got-this-covered smile…like he was born to be a writer.

Those genes were singing to me from his chromosomes.

Lucie, on the other hand, didn’t get it.

“What does the typewriter do?” she asked.

I explained. Telling her how you hit the key, which actuates the striker, and the striker hits the ribbon and leaves an impression on the paper.

Each striker is a letter.

“How many fonts does it have?” she asked.

“One.” “One?” “One. Courier, I think.”

“How big does it print?” she asked.

“One size.”

“One?” “One.” “How many colors does it have?”

“One.” “One?” “One.” “Why did you buy it?” she asked, her father’s daughter.

“It’ll be fun,” Jeremy told her.

“I’m going to type on it. It’s mine.”

Lucie is just at the age when she has starting to say this to herself more frequently: “Boys!”

Jeremy and I looked at each other: “Yeah!”

Big Bands Schedule 55 PLUS had such a nice response • Market Café at Wegman’s to a story it published last issue — “Big 745 Calkins Road, Henrietta Bands and Swing Dancing”— that Jon Seiger and the All-Stars Trio we’ve added (and corrected) some Every Thursday night from dates and times where readers can May 7 through July 30, 5:30 p.m. enjoy the sounds of a big band and dance the night away.

• Flower City Jazz Society Glendoveers Banquet Hall Nels Carman/Penfield 2328 Old Browncroft Blvd., Rotary Big Band Rochester • Penfield Recreation Center May 18 – Jon Seiger and All-Stars 1985 Baird Road, Penfield Band with Neville Dickie, May 5, June 2 at 7:30 p.m.

6:30 p.m.

• Rochester Jazz Festival June 15 – Joe Cavallaro’s Dixie Rochester Regional Health System Band, 6:30 p.m.

Big Tent July 20 – Jazz Happens Band, Main and Gibb streets, Rochester 6:30 p.m.

June 21 at 6 p.m.

August 17 – Stompers and All That Jazz, 6:30 p.m.

Big Band Dance Series • Rochester Cajun/Zydeco • Robach Community Center, Network Ontario Beach Park Harmony House 180 Beach Ave., Rochester 58 East Main St., Webster May 6 - Al Bruno Trio with Jon Kevin Naquin & The Ossun Seiger, 6 p.m., Nostalgic Reunion Playboys at 7:15 p.m.

April 24 at 8 p.m. (lessons at 7:15 May 13 - Al Bruno Trio with Jon p.m.)

Seiger, 6 p.m., Jack Allen Band, River City Slim & The Zydeco 7:15 p.m.

Hogs May 20 - Al Bruno Trio with Jon May 9 at 8 p.m.

Seiger, 6 p.m., Rochester (lessons at 7:15 p.m.)

Metropolitan Jazz Band, 7:15 p.m.

May 27 - Al Bruno Trio with Jon • The Swing-In Seiger, 6 p.m., Greece Jazz Band, St. Thomas Episcopal Church 7:15 p.m.

2000 Highland Ave., Rochester The series takes the summer off Live and DJ music and returns Sept. 2.

Every Thursday, May 7 through the summer •Stardust Ballroom 8:30 p.m.

Edgerton Community Center 41 Backus St., Rochester • Flower City Ballroom Dancers Tuesday night dances begin again Penfield Recreation Center in the fall, check the website for 1785 Baird Rd., Penfield details www.cityofrochester.gov/ Music by DJ. ballroomdances/ May 10 at 6 p.m.

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crafting

Women Bond Around Tatting

By Deborah Jeanne Sergeant

Midge’s Tatters celebrated the group’s fifth anniversary with a luncheon at Patty’s Pantry on Dewey Avenue. (l to r): Maggie Lipton (club chronicler), Mary Ellen Davie (she has been certified as a Master Tatter and handles public relations), Kathy Koscial, Peggy Marcone (president), Sue Laging, Midge Richards (the club’s namesake).

Mary Ellen Davie tatted this doily.

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S

even years ago, Peg Marcone turned her love of tatting into a social club: Midge’s Tatters.

Named for Marcone’s tatting mentor, Midge Richards, the group meets monthly to share patterns, teach, learn and just gab.

“It had been Midge’s dream to start a club,” Marcone said of her 93-year-old friend, who still tats and is a member. “I took it upon myself to start the club.”

Marcone has served as president since the club’s founding. The eight members host themed meetings such as Christmas projects or work on the same pattern doily, for example.

“We all look forward to when we get together,” Marcone said. “We laugh and have a good time.”

The group doesn’t have a specific headquarters but alternates among members’ homes for hostesses.

Tatting encompasses far more than doilies. Marcone, who learned at Richards’ elbow in 1990, and her fellow tatters adorn Christmas ball ornaments and clothing with tatting work, and make entire tablecloths,

hats, jewelry and more from tatting.

Crafters use an intricate series of knots, delicate chains and loops with thread using a shuttle (shuttle tatting) or needles (needle tatting).

“There’s so much you can do with tatting,” Marcone said. “It keeps me busy and my fingers busy.”

Members of Midge’s Tatters offer tatting presentations for the Greece Historical Society and demonstrate their skills at fiber arts fairs.

Tatters Across Time, Inc., a Montana-based tatting proficiency organization, certified member Mary Ellen Davie, an octogenarian, as a master tatter.

“I’ve never seen her without tatting decorating her clothing somehow,” Marcone said. “Midge is pretty much the same.”

Over the years, the members have grown close. Tatters sent Marcone cards when she was sick last year.

“It’s like an extended family,” Marcone said.

Midge Richards (left) chats with Sula Baxter, a less experienced tatter.

Focus is on fun The members’ other interests have drawn them into wider social circles. Through the influence of another of Midge’s Tatters, Marcone joined a mahjong club.

“I don’t know as if I would have done it without her [urging me],” Marcone said. “It’s a lot of fun.”

Marcone hopes to expand the size of the tatting group, which is open to people of all ages.

In fact, a teenager belonged to the group for a while until she left to attend college.

Marcone’s own tatting story began at about that age, when she solemnly swore, hand raised, to her 97-year-old great-aunt that she would learn to tat someday. Decades later, she stumbled upon an advertisement Richards placed and soon Marcone fulfilled her pledge to tat.

Eventually, Marcone passed on her tatting knowledge to one of her three children.

Her husband, Joseph, isn’t “into” tatting, but boasts to others that his wife possesses the rare skill.

“It’s so delicate and pretty,” Marcone said. “I can do it anytime, anywhere.”

Marcone stayed home with her children for 18 years, and then worked at a credit counseling service

Mary Ellen Davie (left) and Carol Conrow are member of Midge’s Tatters.

Sue Laging, Peggy Marcone, Mary Ellen Davie, and Marylou Gorman showing off the tatted star that was the club challenge for December 2014.

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for three years. Now retired, Marcone’s meetings with the tatters give her an opportunity for socializing.

She hopes more retirees interact with like-minded hobbyists to form groups and clubs.

“Be dedicated to what the club is about,” she advised. “Find people who are interested in it.”

She emails members before an upcoming meeting to remind them, and afterwards to discuss the previous meeting. She also keeps the club going by generating more ideas for tatting projects.

“I love to see people’s faces when I give them something simple as a heart or bookmark,” Marcone said.

More on Tatting?

Anyone interested in tatting should contact Peggy Marcone at pmarcone@rochester. rr.com or 585-247-8328.

Though some in her group sell their tatting, Marcone doesn’t.

“How could you put a price on it with all the time you spend?” she asked.

Midge Richards, wearing a shirt decorated with a piece of her tatting.

Carole Conrow displays stationery adorned with pieces of her tatting.

Mary Ellen Davie shows off her awards pins for beginner tatter, intermediate tatter and master tatter.

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Peggy Marcone showing mounted and framed this doily she made. It’s 17 inches in diameter and took approximately 300 hours to create.

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volunteering

‘A Treat of Your Life’ Volunteers at Rochester General talk about helping people, developing new friendships and staying active

By John Addyman

T

o convince students of the value of volunteer work, the Center for Student Involvement at the University of California / San Diego provided 10 good reasons for kids to share their time and energy with others: 1 — You make a difference 2 — Volunteering encourages civic responsibility 3 — You get a chance to give back 4 — You learn a lot 5 — You strengthen your community 6 — You grow as a person and enhance your self-esteem 7 — You help bring people together 8 — You gain professional experience and learn new things 9 — You save resources 10 — It’s good for you!

But what about people 55 and over — is volunteering good for them, too?

“You’d be missing a treat of your life if you didn’t decide to do something like this,” said Thelma Haizlip of Brighton, a 20-year volunteer at Rochester General Hospital. “If you like people, this is a place for you.

It’s all about treating people the way you’d like to be treated.”

“If you’re going to retire, you have to think about what you’re going to do,” said George Hazlip, Thelma’s husband, another RGH volunteer. “Think about what you’d like to do. I like working with people. Here, I can spend some time making peo-

ple more comfortable and happy.”

George has been helping make people comfortable and happy since the 1970s, when he was a member of the board of directors at Northeast Health

Center.

Then there’s Grace Sanford, from Webster. She was a mother of two with her kids in school and nothing to do during the day — her husband

George Haizlip, 83, served on the Rochester General Hospital board for 23 years and remains active as a volunteer, doing clerical work and assisting in the orthopedics practices. He is also active in other ways — often in the gym at 5 a.m., and a former track athlete and daily softball player. He demonstrates that volunteering is something that keeps you young.

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volunteering

Grace Sanford, 97, is the dean of volunteers at Rochester General Hospital, where she has been active for 58 years. She’s in the mailroom once a week, and has become a fixture within the halls of the hospital. Her late husband urged her to start her volunteering career because he didn’t want her to work — remember those days? — and when he retired to play a lot of golf, he told her to keep at it. And she has. didn’t want her to work. Remember those days?

“I didn’t know what I wanted to do,” she explained. Grace found something to do at the precursor of RHG — the old North Side Hospital, when it was new — 58 years ago.

She worked in the lab. “I helped them in everything they needed help with,” Grace said. “I worked with the secretary there who started when she was 19 years old. She still sends me a Christmas card every year. She’s a grandmother now.”

Grace is the dean of volunteers at RGH. You can find her in the mailroom every Friday.

She’s 97.

George completed a career as 40

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a senior human resources manager, including 36 years at the Gleason Works. He’s had special projects assigned to him as a volunteer.

He served on a special committee of volunteers who spoke to patients about their experiences with the hospital, “How they were treated,” he explained. “The rationale was that people with something on their minds wouldn’t necessarily talk to nurses, but would talk with us honestly.”

He’s 83.

Thelma, with a professional career of her own, was a member on the Hospital Association Board. When she started her volunteering work, she was making sheets to send to servicemen. “Now we raise money for

pediatrics, social work and volunteer services. We have parties for children at Easter and Christmas and sponsor Camp Hachamo for kids with asthma,” she said.

Her volunteer career included being a surgical hostess. “I talked to family members after their loved ones went into the operating room, keeping them informed on the steps that were going on, trying to make them comfortable. I like dealing with people, helping them, and giving them good news.”

She now spends one day a week in the mailroom and is on the board of the gift store, where she works twice a month.

Thelma is 76.

Doug Della Pietra, the hospital’s director of customer services and volunteers, says Rochester General Hospital has just what someone who isn’t a college kid anymore needs to continue to feel valued and contributing when the years of the work grind — and their kind of fulfillment — are over.

“RGH provides people an opportunity to stay active, to continue using the expertise and skills they’ve used throughout their working careers,” he said. “Studies show that volunteering is linked to healthful life outcomes.

Here, you can continue to gain new social connections while giving back.”

You can also get in shape.

“For example,” said Della Pietra, “one of our volunteer positions at the main entrance, in visitor services, is very, very active. They will walk you from the main entrance to wherever you’re going in hospital, or push your wheelchair. They walk 10,000 to 12,000 steps in four-hour shifts. It’s great exercise, a great way to stay active, and to make a difference and feel good about what you’re doing for the lives of the people we serve — all at once.”

For Sanford, the 97-year-old from Webster, her work at the hospital is something she gets ready for every week.

“I love it,” she said. “I look forward to coming here every week. I love being with everybody.”

“She finds volunteer work here

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Thelma Haizlip, 76, is a board member on the Rochester General Hospital Association, which raises money for special activities, and is also on the board of the Twig gift shop. She volunteers in the gift shop and in the mail room and recommends volunteering as a way to feel useful, meet people, and be of help to others who need it. She emphasizes that passing up an opportunity to be a volunteer is “missing a treat in life.” so engaging,” said Della Pietra, “She always has a smile on her face that is so radiant and catchy. There’s a gracefulness about her. She’s elegant.

“Grace is also very unassuming and humble,” he added. “There was a time when she found it more difficult to come in to work from the parking garage to the mail room — it’s quite a distance. We offered her a couple of options, but she felt she couldn’t take them because she didn’t want to be treated differently than other volunteers. She is so others-centered and others-focused.”

The Rochester Business Journal honored Grace with the healthcare achievement in volunteering award.

George and Thelma were honored at the RGH volunteer gala two years ago.

George is active with patients in the orthopedics practice, assembling customized take-home kits for people in therapy or being discharged.

EQUAL HOUSING OPPORTUNITY

Mary Ellen Maier, the mailroom supervisor, has worked with Thelma and Grace for many years, and she certainly knows George, too.

As a volunteer or staff member, “there’s not a day goes by that you’re not helping people,” Maier said.

George, Thelma and Grace are special, though. It’s not just the years of service — more than 100 among them — but the approach they take to volunteering.

“They are very genial to everyone,” Maier said, “always giving something; they give back to this hospital an awful lot.”

RGH enjoys 55,000 to 60,000 hours of volunteering every year, 40 percent of that delivered by active older adults. Their contribution and presence are significant in many ways.

“People like Thelma and George and Grace are my second family,” Maier said. “They mean a lot to me.”

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hosts

Richard and Deborah Stankevich enjoy a minute on the deck of their inn, situated on eight acres of land in Mumford. They purchased the Genesee Country Inn nearly a decade ago when they decided to re-invent their lives and run the country-elegant bed and breakfast, which for them is living their dream.

Mumford Marvels Deborah and Richard Stankevich, owners of Genesee Country Inn in Mumford, truly live the dream

By Deborah Blackwell

W

ith a never-ending positive attitude, much hard work and lots of flexibility, Deborah and Richard Stankevich are living their dream.

Owners of the Genesee Country Inn in Mumford, this couple took a long road with many detours to their current homestead — a historical retreat property in the serene woods of Upstate New York. Mumford is a hamlet about 20 miles southwest of Rochester.

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“It’s never too late to pursue whatever it is that is your passion,” says Deborah, 64. “And I always find time to do the things I love, whenever I have a free moment.”

She lives by those notions. When you throw in a lot of desire, family support and a real dedication to happiness, she says, you have a formula for success at any age.

The Genesee Country Inn offers its owners an opportunity to love what they do and live where they

love, while their guests enjoy a respite from the outside world. This haven amidst scenic beauty, with a touch of history and an elegant backdrop, is where the Stankevichs found their little piece of heaven nearly a decade ago. But it was not until after a long stint exploring other professions in several different locations.

“Richard was employed with Traveler’s Insurance,” says Deborah.

“We moved with his job to seven different states, 16 times. I was a teacher

for 30 years, and am still certified in several states.”

When the couple decided they wanted to spend more time together and be closer to family in the Finger Lakes region, they spent a few years mapping out their plan while living in Arkansas. Although they had no formal training running an inn, they examined their skills, listened to their hearts, and followed their dream to Mumford.

“Owning the inn offers us a chance to serve others. We enjoy sharing our hospitality and love meeting our guests,” says Richard, 65.

It also was like coming home for the Stankevichs, who both grew up in Buffalo, met in the seventh grade and were married in 1971.

Deborah gained quite a familiarity with the hospitality industry as a child. Her grandparents and then her parents owned Benny’s Grill and Lounge on Genesee Street, where Deborah spent many years working and learning how to cook.

Now her guests come from far and wide to her inn for her delicious,

home-cooked food.

“Deborah and Richard are amazing hosts who offer the most beautiful and delicious breakfasts,” says Karen Johnson-Stoj of Elma. “They put their hearts and souls into making the inn a special retreat.”

Deborah and Richard knew they could transform the eight acres on Spring Creek into a place where guests could, for even a moment, experience “living the dream.”

They began an extensive renovation shortly after purchasing the circa-1799 stone plaster mill-turned bed and breakfast.

The antique country inn boasts 10 guest rooms each with private baths, restored unique architectural features, fireplaces and views overlooking colorful country gardens, a private spring-fed trout stream, and acres of woods, seasonal beauty and wildlife.

“It’s a short drive a world away,” says Deborah. “We have this beautiful piece of property, but are still close to other things. Guests absolutely love getting away to this convenient spot.”

Sharing the tasks Both Richard and Deborah handle the majority of tasks around the inn. Richard takes care of all the maintenance, repairs, exterior work, gardening, landscaping, and in his spare time he refinishes furniture.

Deborah prepares daily breakfasts and writes a blog titled “Living the Dream,” where she talks about life as an inn owner and shares recipes.

For several years she wrote a column called, “Life of an Innkeeper,” for the quarterly publication, “The Good Life,” as well as writes travel articles for ILoveInns.com.

She wrote a book, “Getting it in Writing,” published in 2011. She also knits, stitches and is an accomplished archer.

The couple enjoys walking their two dogs and watching movies. They belong to a book club together and try to give back to their community.

In addition to running their inn and pursuing their interests and hobbies, Richard belongs to the Scottsville Rotary Club and Deborah is the pres-

The Genesee Country Inn in Mumford, owned by Richard and Deborah Stankevich, sits on eight acres surrounded by natural beauty. This retreat location is “a short drive a world away,” for guests who come from all over to experience a quiet country setting near Rochester and it’s surrounding area.

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hosts

Couple had no prior training in running a bed and breakfast business ident of the Scottsville Free Library Board.

This is a very different path for both Richard and Deborah, who simply enjoy their guests and love sharing their home. Deborah says the best thing about owning a bed and breakfast is meeting so many interesting people and having wonderful conversations.

“We both worked directly with people in our former jobs, so moving into hospitality was a very easy transition,” Richard says.

This past fall they held an Aspiring Innkeepers seminar for future inn owners to learn about running a bed and breakfast. They also donate five rooms on Veterans Day through the B&B for Vets Program as a remembrance to both of their fathers, who served in World War II and Korea.

Their parents were positive and supportive influences, and the Stankevichs do the same for their own children. She says having that emotional network in place is critical to success.

Offspring succeeds as well “I learned early that with hard work you could achieve your dream and be successful,” says Deborah.

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“We encouraged our sons to discover their passion and to pursue it. We told them they would then find happiness.”

That they have. Their three boys, now grown, live their own dreams, inspired from watching their parents.

Oldest son Michael, 38, is a professional photographer for National Geographic Wild, and is the supervising producer on the National Geographic Wild show, “The Incredible Dr. Pol.” In fact, the Stankevich’s rescued Great Dane, Jackson, was featured on the show in November. Son Nicholas, 36, is vice president of operations and finance for Exel Office Services/ Xerox, and owner of Aquatics Now Swim School in Los Angeles. Son Jason, 35, is an account manager for SharpSpring, a software company in Florida and is owner of Falling Leaf Media in Gainesville.

“Richard and I have always been

there for our sons as they pursued their own dreams. We provide them with a loving and supportive family to explore and develop their gifts,” says Deborah. “We have always been there to listen and encourage and to show them that they can do anything they set their minds to do. And our sons have supported us with whatever we decided to do, even investing in and running a bed and breakfast.”

Living their dream is truly a way of life for the Stankevichs and their family. They not only seek opportunity for happiness, but they create it.

“The Genesee Country Inn was an opportunity for Richard and me to use our talents to create a world that we could share with others,” says Deborah. “Every day is special here.

It is truly a magical place that provides a respite from daily life.”

For more information, visit http://geneseecountryinn.com.

The backyard of the Genesee Country Inn is a quiet retreat, offering a view into acres of scenic woods filled with wildlife and the sounds of nature.

Richard and Deborah Stankevich bought the antique mill circa 1799 and restored and renovated it, offering upscale amenities amidst history and its country setting.

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profile

Jim Ingutti refereed basketball games for more than 50 years. Today he enjoys working as an athletic supervisor at Irondequoit High School, assisting fans at the games.

Legend of West Irondequoit High Jim Ingutti is a veritable institution at this Rochester-area school.

And he’s still going — at 93

By Ernst Lamothe Jr.

I

t was only going to be a month.

Jim Ingutti was asked by a West Irondequoit High School principal to help as a teacher’s aide for a month because the person who was in that role was sick.

Ingutti figured he would do his Good Samaritan role and volunteer for those 30 days because he was retired and had free time. Well, the teacher’s aide recovered from her sickness and Ingutti was still having fun with the kids.

Twenty-six years later, he is still there in his role.

“I never thought I was going to stay here this long. But spending time with the kids is so great and keeps me

young, so I decided to keep coming back,” said Ingutti, 93.

Born in Rochester Sept. 14, 1921, he has called Irondequoit home for more than 50 years. In his role as teacher’s aide, he helps supervise several athletic events such as football, basketball and baseball. Sports are a passion of his being a former basketball referee for 55 years. He also played high school baseball and on a team sponsored by Graflex, where he worked for 44 years before his retirement.

Ingutti estimates he has been in every school in Monroe County at least 20 times during his referee career. He joked that he stopped work-

ing as a basketball referee less than five years ago “to give the young fellas a chance.”

He also walks the halls to make sure order is maintained or simply just to answer questions from students walking by. Ingutti also helps out in the cafeteria and hallways.

A World War II D-Day veteran, Ingutti has worked at the high school since 1988.

He loves the energy He says he feels even more alive every time he walks into the school for his five-day-a-week shift. Staying at home and not interacting with others slows him down. He said even May / June 2015 - 55 PLUS

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“[Jim Ingutti] has the energy of a man in his 50s.

Jimmy is just a great guy that you want to be around.

You can tell that kids love being around him and so do I. He comes to work happy to be here every time I see him.” Tom Dolan

Jim Ingutti visits with students at Irondequoit High School where he works as a teacher’s aide. He started working at the school 26 years ago to fill a vacancy for 30 days. “I never thought I was going to stay here this long. But spending time with the kids is so great and keeps me young, so I decided to keep coming back,” he says.

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though people have thought he was crazy to still be working at the high school, he continues to love it everyday.

“Kids always bring energy and excitement,” added Ingutti. “That is one of the reasons I keep coming back year after year. I can’t see myself just sitting in the couch letting your mind wander. You need to keep the blood circulation going by mingling with people.”

Tom Dolan has worked with Ingutti for about a decade. He didn’t know much about him when he first came to West Irondequoit, also as a teacher’s aide. But soon they had a connection and he got to know the wonderful man who still drives a car, plays golf and is as sharp as ever.

“He is as spry as anyone I meet on a given day,” said Dolan, 68. “He has the energy of a man in his 50s. Jimmy is just a great guy that you want to be around. You can tell that kids love being around him and so do I. He comes to work happy to be here every time I see him.”

Also known for his outstanding sense of humor and and singing voice, Ingutti treats students and staff to a tune — especially “White Christmas” — in December and “Danny Boy” on St. Patrick’s Day. Ingutti says he’s most proud of his family. He has five children, 12 grandchildren and 13 great-grandchildren.

Last year, Ingutti went on an Honor Flight, a private, nonprofit organization created solely to honor America’s veterans for their many sacrifices and give them opportunities to go up in a plane. Igutti was a soldier in the Battle of the Bulge.

“I’m happy to be active and alive, and I am going to keep doing this as long as I can,” Ingutti added.

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tech

Automatic Date Reminders Make Life Easier As number of grandchildren and appointments grow, having a way to keep track of all that can be a great help

By Deborah Jeanne Sergeant

N

eed help in keeping track of birthdays, anniversaries and other special dates in your family? As grandchildren and great-grandchildren multiply, it gets even harder to remember when to send greetings and gifts. Relax; there are apps and websites for that, too.

“There are tons of these apps on phones and websites,” said Joel Elias, who teaches and coordinates classes at TechAge Adult Computer Learning Center, a program of the JCC of Greater Rochester.

One such app is Birthday Reminder (iPhone, free). You can import dates easily from Facebook, contacts, or manually. It includes 35 free electronic birthday cards, which is a pretty good assortment for a reminder app (some offer just three).

Birthdays for Android (free) also lets you import easily, and automatically erases duplicates. The app lets you text or tap to call the birthday person. The app also backs up the info externally so you won’t lose your data. Overall, it’s a basic app that’s easy to use.

Another of these is EverMinder (www.EverMinder.com, free), which allows only the members you select to know other members’ birthdays and receive notification of such. The

optional gift registry and links ordering makes birthdays a cinch for grandparents who don’t live close to their grandchildren. You can select or de-select reminders, so if your lowkey son-in-law really hates receiving reminders he’s another year older, you can remove the reminder, unlike with social media platforms such as Facebook.

“It would be nice for a caregiver of an elderly person,” said Daniel Jones, owner of Daniel Teaches, a senior tech tutoring business in Rochester. “As a group, you can collectively set up reminders. It doesn’t seem to make sense for an individual.”

Jones also likes Tick Tock Task (iPhone, $.99), which operates as a general reminder app. You can use it for birthdays and one-time reminders such as appointments. It’s streamlined and doesn’t offer too many options, which can get confusing. Yet, one can also customize it by color for urgency and with icons to make the user experience as unique as you.

Jones also likes the Reminders app (iPhone, pre-programmed) on his phone.

“You can type in your grocery list, reminders for birthdays, and program it so it will remind you before that event,” Jones said. “I set up all my reminders on my calendar. That

way, I can get reminders 15 minutes or two days before an event, however I set it up.”

Reminders seamlessly updates all devices using Calendar, Outlook, and iCloud, which is a plus if you use a tablet, laptop and phone, for example.

Jerry Taylor, owner of SeniorTech in Macedon, and his clients “like the basic calendar” inherent to every cell phone. Although they may not have as many customizable features, they’re free and can help people unfamiliar with electronic reminders get the hang of it before investing effort or money in a reminder app.

Try these tips for effectively programming an electronic reminder:

• Don’t delete perennial reminders; just turn off the alarm.

• Allow enough advance notice for the reminder to actually help you, instead of the day itself.

• Personalize it in a way that makes sense to you. If you choose an alarm sound that’s the same as your ringtone, you may disregard an important reminder.

• If friends and family don’t want to sign up for a group reminder app, don’t push it. You can still remind yourself of their special day on your phone and send greetings.

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long-term care

By Susan Suben

LTC Planning: Men and Women Are Different

L

ong-term care is a difficult topic to talk about let alone plan for. The way we approach this topic is often guided by whether or not we are a man or woman because men and women have different natures.

They sometimes think, respond and act differently when confronted with certain situations. We’ve often heard it said that men are from Mars and women from Venus.

These differences in temperament are sometimes very evident when it comes to long-term care planning.

According to wikisummaries. org, following are some of the distinct male/female characteristics and behaviors as described in John Gray’s book “Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus.”

• Men love to have their abilities recognized and appreciated; women love to have their feelings recognized and appreciated.

• Men like to work on their

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own and exercise their abilities to solve problems quickly and singlehandedly; women like to co-operate and exercise their feelings through interactive communication.

• When faced with tough problems, men become non-communicative so they can work out how to best help themselves; women become communicative so that others can work out how to best help them.

Bear in mind that men and women don’t exhibit these qualities exclusively but I would like to refer to them in the context of long-term care planning. Men and women tend to have different needs and wants based on their personality characteristics therefore, they approach the topics of long-term care and caregiving from a different point of view.

Women generally drive longterm care planning.

The reason being is that women often assume the role of primary caregiver.

They experience the feelings associated with caregiving — the frustration, guilt, emotional upheaval and social isolation. They will often sacrifice their own needs so that others are taken care of.

Based on statistics and what they see happening with family and friends, they know that their husbands will probably need care first and will pre-decease them. They are more likely to want to talk about this risk to with others. They might attend support groups and seek out professionals who can provide information and guidance. They want the comfort of knowing a plan is in place that will give them peace of mind

Yes, when it comes to long-term care, women are from Venus, men are from Mars and protect them and their family.

On the other hand, men view themselves as providers and pragmatic problem solvers. They have always been able to help their families deal with trying times. Should a long-term care situation arise, they assume they will have the ability to handle it. They also tend to see themselves as invincible so it is hard for them to talk about the consequences of a long-term care illness because it makes them feel vulnerable. Spending money to fund a long-term care plan may not seem like money well spent. Generally, they believe that they will never need long-term care, and if they do, their wives or children will take care of them.

Let’s take a look at what the research on long-term care has to say about men and women.

According to a Wall Street Journal article, “Long-Term Care Over An Uncertain Future: What Can Current Retirees Expect,” written by Peter Kemper, Harriet Komisar and Lisa Alecxih, the odds of a 65 year old man and wom-

an needing care is as follows: • Percentage who will need care: 58 percent men; 79 percent woman • Average number of years: 2.2 years men; 3.7 years women • Percentage needing no care: 42 percent men; 21 percent women • Percentage needing one year or less: 19 percent men; 16 percent women • Percentage needing two to five years: 17 percent men; 22 percent women • Percentage needing five or more years: 11 percent men; 28 percent women According to LTC insurance research, women account for 66 percent of LTC insurance claims and stay on claim one year longer than men.

Long-term care is a very real issue that both men and women need to address in a way that makes them feel comfortable and takes into consideration the dynamics of their personalities. Constructive communication is a first start. A woman needs to express her feelings and concerns about being able to care for her husband and herself without fearing for her financial security. A man needs to alleviate these fears by communicating a concrete approach to dealing with the financial and emotional issues that both he and his wife could face.

A thorough investigation of available long-term term care planning strategies is recommended.

There are many to choose from, such as a traditional stand alone long-term care insurance policy, a NYS Partnership plan or life insurance policy with LTC rider.

By compromising wants and needs, a LTC plan can be put into effect. The bottom line is that men and women desire to care for each other. How they do it may differ but the final result should benefit both of them.

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A Little More Now May Mean A Lot More Later.

Financial Consultant AXA Advisors, LLC 175 Corporate Woods, Suite 250 , Rochester, NY 14623 Tel: (585) 475-8460 Fax: (585) 292-1569 Diana.Apostolova@axa-advisors.com

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Susan Suben, MS, CSA, is president of Long Term Care Associates, Inc. and a consultant for Canandaigua National Bank & Trust Company. She can be reached at 800-422-2655 or by email at susansuben@31greenbush.com. Ideas for this article came from ICB’s webinar, “LTC Planning, Men vs. Women.”

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page

By Mike Costanza

Sister Marjory Henninger

S

Founder of Grace of God Recovery House

ister Marjory Henninger has donned a nun’s veil, taught children their ABC’s, helped local men throw off drug and alcohol addiction, fought against injustice, and been put out of her order.

Through it all, her energy, enthusiasm and good humor never seem to have flagged. Nowadays, she’s known as “Sister Margie.”

Q. You co-founded and head the Grace of God Recovery House, a nonprofit facility that Spiritus Christi Church operates in Rochester. Can you tell us about your facility?

A. This is a place for men recovering from drug and alcohol abuse who have no place to go in between treatment and a halfway house…or an apartment. They don’t get thrown back into the streets or back into a home situation where people are using and drinking, and then after all that rehab fall through the cracks again. They live here and work the program here.

Q. What kinds of services does Grace of God provide for these men?

A. We do groups with the men, and each man that comes in [and] gets a primary staff person that is their goto person—another person that’s in program. They’re in either AA [Alcoholics Anonymous] or NA [Narcotics Anonymous] but they’re people who have much more time — seasoned people, so to speak.

We [also] do meals together… groups together…one on ones. We work with them in continuing their outpatient program, making sure that’s in place and working with the other halfway house that they’re going to.

Q. Born in Rochester and raised in Chili, you have spent much of your 50

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adult life working with those in need.

Why? A. My mother — we lived near the railroad tracks — used to feed the transient people that got off the trains. When the need arose, she responded to it. I feel like that’s what I do — when the need arises, I respond.

I also grew up in an alcoholic family, so my call had developed over the years.

Q. You were born Irene Henninger, and took the name “Marjory” when you joined the Sisters of St. Joseph of Rochester in 1960. Why did you become a Catholic nun?

A. I always had a little religious bent to me. When I was a little girl, I would make May shrines in my bedroom, and go out and pick violets and put them in there. We also had retreats in high school that I loved — we’d have a week of retreat before Easter — so I was always attracted to some parts of that. I guess when I got through high school and saw the Sisters of St. Joseph…I just decided, “Yeah.” And, I wanted to be a teacher, so it kind of connected.

Q. After teaching in two Catholic schools and working as the principal of a third, you became pastoral assistant at Corpus Christi Church, a Roman Catholic church that is part of Diocese of Rochester. Father James Callan, with whom you’d worked before, was in charge of the parish. How were conditions in the parish at that time?

A. Corpus Christi was going downhill. It was just the two of us — there was nobody else on the staff — so we just kind of did the next thing that came along. There was no money, so we just lived out of donations that we had in an envelope in Father Jim’s office. The diocese wasn’t worried

about us, because they were going to close it (Corpus Christi). We had free rein...it was wonderful.

Q. In 1998, the Roman Catholic Church fired the leadership of Corpus Christi. As a group, you decided to found Spiritus Christi, a church more in line with the values that all of you, and a large part of your congregation, found important. In 2002, the Sisters of St. Joseph decided to ask you to leave. Why did the order do so?

A. They said I was giving grave scandal, because I was preaching and participating in this church. Their whole move with me was to try to get me to leave Spiritus Christi. I just kept saying “My vocation has not changed, my call from God has not changed, so do what you’ve got to do.”

Q. You’ve beaten ovarian cancer, had a tumor removed from your pituitary gland, and recently underwent knee replacement surgery. What is in your future?

A. I don’t know how long I’m going to be here [at Grace of God]. I know that no matter what I’m doing, I’m going to be happy. I don’t know if I’ll be visiting the sick. I don’t know if I’ll be going back to the street. I was a sister of St. Joseph, now I’m a sister of Spiritus Christi, because nothing has changed for me.

To donate to the Grace of God Recovery House, contact Sister Margie at irhenn@ aol.com. Writer Mike Costanza, who conducted this interview, is a member of Spiritus Christi Church.

From Our Hearts To Yours.

Introducing the HeartMatters Cardiac Rehab Program.

St. Ann’s Community is proud to introduce HeartMatters, a new evidence based program that was developed in collaboration with Cardiologists and Cardiothoracic surgeons including Rochester General Hospital Chief of Cardiology, Gerald Gacioch, M.D. and St. Ann’s Chief Medical Officer, Diane Kane, M.D. HeartMatters provides the region’s best program for patients with cardiac conditions such as heart failure, myocardial infarction and post cardiac surgery (i.e., CABG, valve replacement).

We recognize the uniqueness of each individual and will work with you to develop a plan of care that will improve your quality of life and reduce the likelihood of readmission back to the hospital. You and your family will receive the knowledge necessary to better manage your condition after returning home.

For more information or to learn how to preplan a rehab stay, please call 585-697-6311 or visit stannscommunity.com.

The HeartMatters cardiac rehab program is available at: St. Ann’s Community, Irondequoit and St. Ann’s Care Center, Cherry Ridge Campus in Webster.

Caring forThe Most Important People on Earth

HeartMatters Cardiac Medical Director, Gerald Gacioch, M.D. and St. Ann’s Chief Medical Officer, Diane Kane, M.D.

Supported by a grant from Greater Rochester Health Foundation

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