March 2014 by Rochester Woman Magazine

march 2014

too soon to say goodbye

empowering women

Patricia Blair

Remembering Philip Seymour Hoffman

The Mrs. Ballington Booth Bag Celebrating the Legacy of VOAâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Founder

Rocking Rochester Local Women Making Beautiful Music

f o r a l l t h e t h i n g s t h at yo u a r e . . . r o c h e s t e r w o m a n

rochesterWomanMag.com :: march 2014

w w w. r o c h e s t e r w o m a n m a g . c o m

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March ETC 7

57 62

PLATTER CHATTER: Furoshiki Kitchen & Cocktails 8 FASHION FORWARD 10 FOR A GOOD CAUSE: Mrs Ballington Booth Bag 17 YOUR MENTAL HEALTH: Part I

QUEEN OF ARTS 24 COVER STORY: Rocking Rochester

HEALTHY WOMAN: We’ve Come a Long Way Baby 36 FABULOUS FINDS: The Abigail Riggs Collection 38 MENOPAUSE MINUTE: Hot Flashes

LOCAL BUSINESS MATTERS: EFS Auto

IN HER OWN WORDS: Linda Richards

FITNESS: Becoming the Radiant Woman

SPECIAL FEATURE: Jessica Walker

RW INSPIRES 51 CALENDAR OF EVENTS 54 SPECIAL FEATURE: Too Soon To Say Goodbye

TIPS FOR WOMEN: Prepping To Sell Your Home 58

SPECIAL FEATURE: Women and Skin Cancer

LEADING WOMAN: Patricia Blair

51 22

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LETTER FROM THE PUBLISHERS Michelle Sestito, Amanda Lee Peters, and Lisa Canarvis. Read about their journeys on page [27].

“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.” –Eleanor Roosevelt

More than 100 years ago, Maud Ballington Booth, co-founder of the nonprofit organization Volunteers of America (VOA), was an indomitable pioneer who paved the way not only for women to find equal footing in charitable work, but for the human race at large to turn their eyes and hearts toward touching the “untouchables.” In honor of her work and dedication, VOA has commissioned a “Purse With a Purpose” designed by Gail Riggs, to celebrate Booth’s accomplishments. Read the story on page[17].

Publishers Kelly Breuer Barbara McSpadden Editor-in-Chief

Barbara McSpadden

associate editor Ashley Cooper

Creative DIRECTOR Kelly Breuer

Photography

Jeff Gerew John Lee Stephen Reardon Brandon Vick

Contributing Writers

There have been many incredible women throughout history who have broken down barriers, challenged conventional thinking. And by doing so, they have proved without a doubt that women are capable of doing anything they set their mind to regardless of gender. According to the Pew Research Center, today’s young women are starting their careers more educated than their male counterparts. The same research also shows that young women are making more money relative to men their age than their mothers and grandmothers did. We are clearly making progress, but we still have a long way to go and it’s up to us, the current generation, to continue to raise the bar and keep the path moving forward. In the music industry, some incredible women have opened doors for today’s up-and-coming talent. Women like Janis Joplin, Joan Jett, Grace Slick, and Bonnie Raitt, just to name a few, have all had a lasting impression on the female voices we enjoy listening to today. Because their influence can still be heard today, we decided to take a look at the women involved in the local music scene here in Rochester. These women are all setting their own style and making a name for themselves through their words and music. Starting with the most seasoned of the local female musicians, Deb Magone, we also spoke with the next generation of women including the Morgan Twins, Amanda Ashley, Teagan Ward, Melia,

When we think about women’s history, we must recognize that it’s not easy for women to break into male-dominated industries but more and more women are finding their way in. The auto repair industry is one in which women have made few advances. Robin Chiavaroli and Erin Hassall, owners of EFS Auto are changing that. Without any experience in the industry, these women have created a successful business built on one principal that is tried and true in every industry — exceptional customer service. Read their story on page [42]. Lastly, we are excited to announce that you can now enjoy Rochester Woman Magazine on all of your favorite electronic devices. We launched our iPad app last year and this month we are launching apps for Android, Kindle and iPhone. Now, no matter what device you have you can be the first to read RWM delivered to you electronically every month, before the print issue hits the stands. Download your app today and never miss another issue again! Sincerely

Krista Bellardo Anissa Buckley Christopher J. Charleton Bethany Comella Ashley Cooper Susan Glenz Joan E. Lincoln Amy Long Nadia Pierre-Louis Shraddha Pradivadi, MD Linda Richards Nicole Shein Lesley Loss, MD Hayley Strauss Brandy Whitbourne James Woods, MD

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Unlike any other publication in the Rochester area, our feature articles address major topics that interest local women. Each issue includes articles on health, fashion, fitness, finance, home matters, dining, lifestyle and personal perspectives, as well as a spotlight on local Rochester women. The print magazines are distributed locally in over 350 locations and will be in your inbox electronically by the first week of every month. The publication is available free of charge.

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Contact our home office 585.287.5362 1115 E. Main St, Box 60 I Rochester, NY 14609 info@rochesterwomanmag.com

ON OUR COVER... Local musician Deborah Magone has been making beautiful music for over 40 years, and now she joins eight other local female artists for our cover story on the music scene in Rochester. Photo by Jeff Gerew. Make-up by Joan Lincoln and Ashley Knight from JoanLincoln.com

Download our media kit at www.rochesterwomanmag.com The magazine is published 12 times a year by Rochester Woman Magazine, llc. 1115 E. Main Street, Box 60, Rochester NY 14609. Copyright © 2014 Rochester Woman Magazine, llc. No part of this magazine may be reproduced or republished without the consent of the publishers. Rochester Woman Magazine is not responsible for unsolicited submissions, manuscripts, photos or artwork. All such submissions become the property of Rochester Woman Magazine, llc. and will not be returned.

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MOVIES

Single Mom’s Club - 3/14 Brought together by an incident at their children’s school, a group of single mothers from different walks of life bond, and create a support group that helps them find comedy in the obstacles of life, as well as their inner strength to overcome their personal challenges.

OUT & ABOUT Power Your Potential Women’s Leadership ConferenceFriday, March 14 Celebrate National Women’s Month with Saunders College of Business at Power Your Potential. The half-day conference includes a keynote presentation along with an educational presentation on strategic business trends and a panel. Attendees will participate in activities that will build their organization and enhance their career. Prominent Rochester business women will provide firsthand knowledge on challenges that women face and how to become a more effective leader as well as share their personal experiences. Keynote speaker for the event is JJ DiGeronimo, founder and CEO of Purposeful Woman and Tech Savvy Women. DiGeronimo is a technology executive, author, speaker and business woman. She provides Career & Leadership Strategies for High Impact Women to effectively prioritize, align and achieve their desired goals. She is the author of the highly sought-after books for women, “The Working Woman’s GPS”, and “Before You Say Yes” (e-book). She also co-authored, “The Confident Woman, Tapping into Your Inner Power”. DiGeronimo has been featured in numerous publications which include Working Mother WITI, Fox Business, Live on Lakeside, Woman’s Magazine, SHRM, Woman’s Day Magazine, The Glass Hammer, the Grindstone, ITWorld, Career-Intelligence and Rescue a CEO. She has shared her insights and discoveries with many women’s organizations including CISCO, WITI, YWCA, MaryKay, Women for Economic & Leadership Development, Dress for Success and many leadership and entrepreneur conferences. Also speaking at the event will be:

Muppets Most Wanted– 3/21 The entire Muppets gang embarks on a global tour, selling out grand theaters across European destinations. But mayhem follows the Muppets overseas, as they find themselves unwittingly entangled in an international crime caper headed by Constantine—the World’s number one criminal and a dead ringer for Kermit—and his dastardly sidekick Dominic, aka number two, portrayed by Ricky Gervais.

Noah– 3/28 God is saddened at the wickedness of mankind and sends a great flood to destroy all life on Earth, but instructs Noah, a man “righteous in his generation,” to build a wooden ark and save a remnant of life from the Flood. Noah builds the ark and saves his family and representatives of all animals from the massive flood waters which cover the Earth.

Sabatoge – 3/28 An elite DEA task force deals with the world’s deadliest drug cartels and specializes in complex mobile operations. The team executes a tactical raid on a cartel safe house. What looks to be a typical raid turns out to be an elaborate theft operation, pre-planned by the DEA squad. After hiding millions in stolen cash, the team believes their secret is safe - until someone begins assassinating them one by one.

Linda Murphy a lifelong entrepreneur, learner and teacher of business. She is a 25 year CEO of an Industrial Rubber Distributor/Fabrication company, Flex Enterprises, Inc. She led her company to be twice one of KPMG’s Top 1—Fastest Growing Rochester companies. Christina Gullo President/CEO of St. Joseph’s Villa of Rochester (now Villa of Hope). During her tenure at the Villa of Hope, Gullo has led a fiscal turnaround, created a new strategic plan inclusive of new program services, an updated organizational structure and an entire rebranding effort for the organization. The cost to attend Power Your Potential is $10 for students, $25 for RIT alumni, faculty and staff, and $30 for the general public, and includes lunch. To register, go to www.rit.edu/cob/ womensconference or contact Dana Pierce at 585-475-2199 or dpierce@saunders.rit.edu.

March is National Colon Cancer Awareness Month March is National Colon Cancer Awareness Month and the American Cancer Society is emphasizing the importance of age-appropriate colorectal cancer screening. An estimated 50,310 deaths from colorectal cancer are expected to occur in 2014, accounting for 9 percent of all cancer deaths. The Society is recommending preventative measures individuals can take to reduce their risk of developing the disease. Adults should maintain a healthy weight, get plenty of physical activity, and eat a diet that is high in vegetables, fruits, and whole grains, and low in red and processed meats. In addition, limiting alcohol intake can also help reduce your risk of this disease. For information about colon cancer screening and nutrition and physical activity recommendations visit www.cancer.org/coloncancer . Colorectal cancer is highly treatable if found in its early stages, and half of all colon cancer deaths in the United States could be prevented if everyone followed recommended screening guidelines. Most people should start getting screened for colorectal cancer at age 50, but people with a family history are at higher risk and may need to be screened earlier. The Society recommends the following tests to find colorectal cancer early: Tests that detect precancerous polyps and cancer: • Flexible sigmoidoscopy every five years, or • Colonoscopy every 10 years, or • Double contrast barium enema (DCBE) every five years, or • CT colonography (CTC) every five years.

chatter ::platter

Furoshiki

Kitchen & Cocktails

By Nicole Shein | Photos by Brandon Vick

::SHIFT+CONTROL

Manhattan, sometime in the late 1980’s: My roommates and I, having just struggled mightily to make the rent on our five-floor walk-up on the Lower East Side, are preparing dinner together. “Chicken, shrimp, or Oriental?” asks James. Jeff huffs in annoyance. “Did you eat all the beef flavor already?” “It all tastes the same,” I say. “Just have the chicken flavor.” Of course, we were eating instant ramen noodles, those packaged bricks that are ubiquitous in every dorm room across America. If you’ve never fixed yourself a late-night snack of ramen while cramming for a college final, or after an evening of drinking warm beer from red Solo cups, consider yourself lucky. If, however, just the thought of that sodium-laden spice packet inspires flashbacks, then head to Park Avenue for an authentic ramen experience. Furoshiki, located near the busy Park and Berkeley intersection, is a cozy spot to get your slurp on. Their tagline, “Asian-inspired comfort food,” certainly was promising when I stopped by on a chilly, gloomy February afternoon to check out the ramen. Before unwrapping my chopsticks, however, I was presented with a plate of steamed pork-belly buns. These have been a popular menu item in pan-Asian restaurants over the past few years, and Furoshiki’s version -- at least based on the number of other customers I heard ordering the buns -- are hot sellers. With a perfectly soft, steamed bun, the delectable slab of pork belly hiding inside, a piquant sauce and the unusual addition of pickle slices, it was easy to see why. Missing from these were the traditional scallions and peanuts, but it wasn’t much of a loss. The main attraction at Furoshiki is most definitely the noodles. There are five basic ramen offerings -- pork, chicken, miso, veggie, and kimchi -- and all start with a slow-cooked broth. Then, the chefs load the bowls with add-ons like veggies, meat, scallions, soft-boiled egg halves, sprouts, and greens. Patrons can add meats, tofu, kimchi or a “spice bomb” -- a house blend of spices plus Sriracha -- to customize the standard ramen bowls to their liking. The pork-bone ramen that I tasted was indeed a comforting meal, featuring a balance of savory broth, perfectly cooked meat and the requisite noodles. But if you’re not in a noodle mood, Furoshiki also serves up sandwiches (including the now-trendy ramen burger, in which the beef patty is nestled between two rounds of cooked noodle “buns”) and salads. There are also enough small plates that diners could easily orchestrate their own dim sum-style meal, choosing from chicken or beef yakitori, pork dumplings, edamame, salt-and-pepper calamari, fried tofu bites, chicken wings and lettuce wraps. Sides include wasabi peas, shoestring fries, tempura-fried green beans, brussels sprouts, and more. For dessert, there’s cheesecake and chocolate-covered fortune cookies. The bar at Furoshiki, although physically small, boasts a wide range of sake and sake-inspired cocktails, as well as wine and beer. For $10, a group of four can each enjoy a shot, and the restaurant offers a daily 2-for-1 beer and wine happy hour, as well as $3 wine, beer and sake specials from 9-11pm. Furoshiki’s website says that there are 34,488 ramen shops in Japan, which is a testament to the satisfaction this flavor-packed soup can provide. Now Rochesterians can taste for themselves how different the authentic version of ramen is from its much maligned, college-staple cousin. Furoshiki Kitchen and Cocktails I 682 Park Avenue, Rochester, NY 14607 (585) 771-0499 I www.parkavenoodles.com rochesterWomanMag.com :: march 2014

HOW TO SQUEEZE

::Fashion

forward

FashINTOionYOUR LUGGAGE

By Joan e. lincoln

It’s that time of year again: winter/spring break vacation season. If you’re lucky enough to be getting out of this wicked winter we are experiencing, educate yourself and your family on how to pack a suitcase for your holiday destination. The goal when packing a suitcase is to fit as much as possible into a small space. Being able to pack efficiently is an especially important skill in this day and age. So maybe you drive, fly, or even cruise...but are you prepared to pack your luggage for that holiday destination? Your first step is to check the weather of your final destination. Last week I packed a small carry on luggage, so when I returned to Rochester after driving my daughter down to Columbus, Georgia to begin a new chapter and new career, I could just “CARRY-ON” with no hassle my small piece of luggage for my flight back to Rochester. What I didn’t pack or plan for was to be stranded in Atlanta, Georgia for four additional days two of which had a no travel advisory! You know what that means, especially in an epic ice storm in Atlanta Georgia? No shopping! You know the rule, no more than 50 lbs and no liquids over 3oz. I followed all the rules. Four days stranded in Atlanta and five canceled flights will create frustration for any traveler not to mention her wardrobe. Fortunately, most of what I packed was lightweight, could be layered and for the most part, could be coordinated to mix and match. I packed with great determination and started the bottom layer of my suitcase with footwear and outerwear, then rolling my denim and heavier items, followed by many camis and tops, I squeezed the air out of my suitcase..believe me! Ladies, our most precious makeup and toiletries are always a concern when flying so make sure you follow the rules. I continue to promote the Trish McEvoy Makeup Cosmetic bag system and placed my precious makeup in the middle of the luggage padded with clothing so I didn’t have to worry about having it damaged in transit. Knowing how to pack a suitcase is essential to being a good traveler, it truly is like a puzzle. Also, get the process started early so that substitutions can be made and coordinate with layers so that when cooler and warmer weather occurs you are prepared for what may come your ways. Happy Travels! Joan Lincoln owns Panache Vintage and Finer Consignment in Brighton Commons. Her Fashion Forward segment can also be heard every Thursday morning during Wake Up With Tony on WARM 101.3 exploring all of the latest fashion trends and styles. 10

march 2014 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

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::for a good

The Mrs Ballington Booth Bag Celebrating the Legacy of VOA’s Founder

cause “The more one loves, the stronger becomes the capacity for loving and it is the hands that are always busy with helpfulness that always find yet more to do.” -Maud Ballington Booth

rochesterWomanMag.com :: march 2014

cause ::for a good

National Women’s History month presumably prompts us to consider the past and present role of females in American society. While continual advancement is likely outstanding in some aspects, there have doubtlessly been great strides in the way of achieving gender equality. Much of the progression of today is due, in large part, to the efforts of our courageous predecessors.

Succeeding an unfortunate dispute regarding the “Americanization” of the Salvation Army, the Booths, unable to return to England, opted to found their own organization combining the best of their strengths and their most pertinent passions. Several religious and political leaders showed their support for the organization, including Reverend Josiah Strong, who stated of Mr. and Mrs. Booth:

Maud Ballington Booth, co-founder of the nonprofit organization Volunteers of America, was one such indomitable pioneer who paved the way not only for women to find equal footing in charitable work, but for the human race at large to turn their eyes and hearts once and for toward touching the “untouchables.”

“I believe in the Volunteers because I believe in the man and woman around whom this movement has crystallized. I believe in the Volunteers because I believe in the principles on which the movement is based.”

A diminutive woman barely surpassing five feet in stature, Booth was a force to be reckoned with. As her vision for Volunteers of America then is explicitly recognized by the organization now, it is evident that this woman has left a remarkable legacy over 100 years post-endowment. The phrase she coined, “look up and hope,” is still synonymous with the mission and outreach of Volunteers of America locally, as well. “Besides my kids, Maud is my favorite person to talk about,” shares JoAnne Ryan, President and Chief Executive Officer of Volunteers of America of Western New York. “Truly a well-rounded woman, she exemplified ‘service above self,’ the idea of being there for your neighbor.” Ryan reiterates the wonderment of Booth’s qualifications as a public servant. According to sources, Booth was born Maud Elizabeth Charlesworth in Surrey, England on September 15, 1865 into a world of opulence. Her father, a well-respected lawyer, turned his attention to social welfare and consequently, became an Anglican priest. Veronica Constantine, in her graduate informational paper for Grand Valley State University, asserted that “her parent’s work with social issues led to Maud’s great interest and concern for social welfare and social service.” By 1882, Booth would join Catherine Booth for the Salvation Army, commissioned to organize efforts in other parts of Europe. After her outreach in France and Switzerland, Booth returned to London to minister to the destitute. In 1886, she married Ballington Booth, son of Salvation Army founder, William Booth. According to Constantine, Maud became enamored with Booth after attending a speech he delivered at a Salvation Army Holiness Meeting. Constantine stated: “Captivated by his speech, Maud felt a calling in life to serve the homeless, mentally ill, children and others in need. Ballington’s passionate speech about serving and saving the impoverished profoundly moved the idealistic young Maud.” Ryan brought to mind the sentiment that Maud took her husband’s first name as her own, too. This reflects the couple’s devotion to one another, and to the mission, signifying that both husband and wife would have an equal hand in their work. “She was very much a co-founder,” adds Ryan. After the couple wed, the Booths landed in New York and re-structured several components of the Salvation Army in the United States. As Constantine shared, “Their efforts made the American Unit of the Salvation Army one of the most organized and fiscally sound units within the organization. They used exceptional coordination skills with the volunteers and the donors by persuading influential people to get involved. The Booths were able to greatly improve the American Unit making it one of the best branches of the Salvation Army.” 18

march 2014 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

The vision of the Volunteers of America (originally called, “God’s American Volunteers”) was to “go wherever it was needed and to do whatever work came to hand” (VOA). The organization, which reached 650 volunteers and 140 posts within its first six months of existence, reshaped the public’s view of the poor and hungry, of illiterate, of the mentally ill, of the orphaned and abandoned, of prisoners, of the jobless and more. In whatever social areas that expressed a need, the Volunteers of America were there to serve. Maud Ballington Booth sought to be a beacon of light in the darkest places. She was instrumental in the parole reformation. It was through her efforts that the first services were provided to ex-convicts who were unable to ease back into society. Until the Booths’ intervention, former prisoners were secluded and forced to live out their days laboring in factories. Booth was affectionately deemed “The Little Mother” among the inmates. Equipped with a compassion that stretched beyond what many of the time were capable of, Booth spent much time in the prison walls ministering to the needs of the occupants, fighting to improve the conditions, and raise public awareness. “Maud was very much about redemption, about granting others a second chance,” said Ryan. Mrs. Booth toured the Chautaqua Circuit sharing of her experiences with the prisoners. In 1896, Booth delivered a speech at Sing Sing that has left its mark on history. According to Constantine, the speech “led to the development of the Volunteer Prison League, a group that focused on turning the lives of prisoners around during their period of imprisonment. The group worked to train prisoners and to prepare them for life in the free world.” Before Booth’s influence, there was virtually no concept of a “halfway house.” JoAnne Ryan, a true admirer of Maud Ballington Booth says that the courageous co-founder’s influence has had a tremendous impact on the way she leads the organization today. She is consistently motivated by Booth’s “tireless, humble work” for the betterment of all peoples. Because of Booth, Ryan admits, “I grow every day.” To celebrate the legacy of Booth just in time for annual “Founder’s Week,” the VOA has partnered with local designer, Dr. Abigail Riggs, creator of the “Purse with a Purpose” series to commemorate the pioneers that came before us. Riggs has a designed a “Mrs. Ballington Booth” bag with proceeds from its sale going to aid the Volunteers of America in meeting the needs of the community and therefore, keeping Booth’s spirit alive. The VOA “Purse with a Purpose” is truly a treasure to behold and features the seemingly fragile, yet remarkably strong “water lily” that Booth alluded to in so many of her famous nature analogies. It will premiere this March and is one that you can’t help but add to

“I will help yo u over the roug h places, but I will not ca rry you.”

cause

When asked what the public needs to understand the most about Volunteers of America, Ryan wills that “everybody in our city would understand our work,” lessening the VOA’s reputation as the area’s “best kept secret.” Today, the VOA is still recognized as being one of the few social services with a holistic approach to public outreach, ensuring that an individual’s “physical, emotional and spiritual” needs are met.

::for a good

your collection. Riggs has designed several limited edition bags in the past that were inspired by the likes of Susan B. Anthony (The Miss Anthony), Jacquline Bouvier Kennedy (The Miss Bouvier) and Annie Oakley (The Miss Annie). The bags are sold to benefit local organizations like The Susan B. Anthony House, The Center for Youth, Rochester General Hospital and others.

“If Mrs. Ballington Booth were here today in Rochester, what do you think she would say about the present work of Volunteers of America?” I ask Ryan, out of sheer curiosity. “I think she’d be pleased,” Ryan responds with a smile. “I think she’d be embarrassed by the notoriety, but I think she’d be pleased.” I couldn’t agree more… Source(s): JoAnne Ryan, President and CEO of Volunteers of America Western New York Volunteers of America: http://www.voa.org/About-Us/Our-History LearningtoGive.org (Veronica Constantine) http://www.naswfoundation.org/pioneers/b/MaudBallingtonBooth.htm

rochesterWomanMag.com :: march 2014

cause

::for a good

cause

::for a good

The VOA “Purse with a Purpose” is truly a treasure to behold and features the seemingly fragile, yet remarkably strong “water lily” that Booth alluded to in so many of her famous nature analogies.

From Our Hearts To Yours. Introducing the HeartMatters Cardiac Rehab Program.

St. Ann’s Community is proud to introduce HeartMatters, a new evidence based program that was developed in collaboration with Cardiologists and Cardiothoracic surgeons including Rochester General Hospital Chief of Cardiology, Gerald Gacioch, M.D. and St. Ann’s Chief Medical Officer, Diane Kane, M.D. HeartMatters provides the region’s best program for patients with cardiac conditions such as heart failure, myocardial infarction and post cardiac surgery (i.e., CABG, valve replacement). We recognize the uniqueness of each individual and will work with you to develop a plan of care that will improve your quality of life and reduce the likelihood of readmission back to the hospital. You and your family will receive the knowledge necessary to better manage your condition after returning home.

For more information or to learn how to preplan a rehab stay, please call 585-697-6311 or visit stannscommunity.com. The HeartMatters cardiac rehab program is available at: St. Ann’s Community, Irondequoit and St. Ann’s Care Center, Cherry Ridge Campus in Webster.

Caring forThe Most Important People on Earth

HeartMatters Cardiac Medical Director, Gerald Gacioch, M.D. and St. Ann’s Chief Medical Officer, Diane Kane, M.D.

Supported by a grant from Greater Rochester Health Foundation

part 1 ::interact:

When Today’s Marital Conflict is rooted in Yesterday’s hurts… By Christopher J. Charleton

The media bombards us daily regarding failed celebrity relationships; TV series capture the anguish of spurned love. But whether it’s in a soap opera or reality show, drama is not limited to the big screen. The relational tensions portrayed strike a chord within many of us, and the anger, disappointment, and disillusionment are all-too-often painfully familiar.

Historically, women in our culture have complained that their husbands and partners are largely clueless about their feelings, legitimate needs and heart’s desires, regardless of how frequently or articulately they have tried to communicate them. Common complaints run the gamut: All he does is zone out in front of the TV… He’s always working and never spends time with me and the kids… He complains that I nag and control, but he never takes any initiative! ... He doesn’t listen, and doesn’t care about my feelings; in fact, he judges me for them... He expects sex yet makes no attempt at romance... It’s always all about him… and I feel used and taken for granted… The list goes on and on. Years of accumulated hurts, disappointments and unfulfilled expectations eventually lead to feelings of hopelessness and powerlessness. Many women find themselves trapped in one of three types of marriages: 1) The Cold War Marriage is characterized by endless anger, bickering, nit-picking, insults, blaming and criticism. 2) The Marriage of the Living Dead is like an ornate cemetery mausoleum (beautiful on the outside but full of dead bones.) It appears strong and intimate in social settings but, behind closed doors, there is little to no emotional connection. 3) The Marriage of Peaceful Co-existence is one in which couples function like college roommates. They live separate lives with separate friends, interests, and jobs. They focus on household duties or their kids’ activities, but never rock the boat by sharing their deepest selves. Despite heroic efforts to maintain passion, all marriages run the risk of encountering “intimacy thieves.” More accurately described as anything or anyone that steals away the love you desperately need to feel cherished and secure within your relationship. Competing with issues surrounding work, kids’ schedules, excessive television/video game usage, in-laws, porn, alcohol, sports, hunting, and even multiple mistresses can add to the history of hurt, resentment, and devastation which gets buried by the hectic demands of day to day life. “Half the people who get married in America end up divorced, and of those who stay together, half say they are not very happy,”

states clinical psychologist and theologian Neil Clark Warren, founder of eHarmony. So what’s going on? Every starry-eyed bride is convinced that her love is so passionate, it will conquer all obstacles. Whether things gradually or suddenly fall apart, the question is: What do we do? How do we get off the hamster wheel of fruitless efforts to make changes? The first step is to recognize that the majority of marital conflict deals with three issues: 1) insufficient emotional management, 2) poor communication skills, and 3) the unconscious replay of childhood wounding. Learning emotional management and communication skills are immensely helpful, but the difference between symptom improvement and true transformation lies with number 3. When closely examined, the daily power struggles that most couples endure provide windows into the unresolved wounds of the past. Beneath the complaint of the moment lies a desperate unconscious drive to resolve pain by getting to the core unmet childhood needs. It never ceases to amaze me that smart couples cannot resolve their difficulties. It’s never about intelligence; it’s always about linking the unresolved pain of the past to the conflict of the moment. In other words, the past matters. “As long as you’ve lived, your experiences have sifted down in your psyche, forming layers like the bands of colored rock in the Grand Canyon. The most fundamental layers were laid down in your childhood, when your brain was most impressionable” (Neuropsychologist Rick Hanson, PhD.). Childhood wounding becomes the soil for ongoing marital dissatisfaction. Consequently, when emotionally triggered by the conflicts of everyday life, we unknowingly cease to see our spouse as a help mate. Instead, our partner becomes the representation of our imperfect (though

perhaps well-intentioned) mother, father, sibling, pastor, teacher, etc. After years of strategizing about solutions for change that don’t pan out, many women have discovered an unsettling truth – it is next to impossible to uncover unconscious wounds without the help of an objective observer. We need a trained professional to assist in decoding present day conflict in relation to the age-old hurts, disappointments, unfulfilled dreams, agony, and powerlessness we have buried. Healthy conflict resolution requires the ability to examine the way our past magnifies the pain of the present moment; this is vital to the development of intimacy and relational transformation. What are the points of present pain in your marriage? • Affairs, emotional entanglements at the office, intimacy thieves • A spouse involved with pornography, cybersex, alcohol, & other addictions • Chronic boredom or stagnation in emotional intimacy • The gnawing ache of unfulfilled expectations • Burn out from carrying more than your fair share Whether you want to bring your marriage to the next level of intimacy, are suffering quietly, or are deliberating on the courthouse steps of divorce, the team at InterAct are poised to help. We are equipped to assist you and your spouse resolve the underlying problems that sabotage your best intentions and perpetuate dysfunction and misery. Transforming your relationship IS possible, and hundreds of couples have healed and now experience deeper love, security and intimacy as a result of their professional assistance. Christopher J. Charleton, LCSW, is a nationally-recognized therapist and speaker in the areas of marital restoration, addiction, and trauma. His main office is located in Penfield, NY.

Marital transforMation – Myth or reality? When Bearing the pain is no longer a solution, interact counseling can help 4 Stabilize faltering marriages 4 Raise the emotional intelligence and bonding capacity of men 4 Resolve ingrained bitterness, resentment and passive aggression 4 Address conflict and anger in a way that increases trust and relational enjoyment

2136 Penfield Rd | 585-388-8010 | www.interactcounseling.com

arts ::queen of

By Ashley Cooper

: y a w d a d o n r a B w No hen T

It has been echoed since days of old that troupers of the stage romp and spree where stars of the silver screen fear to tread. Pantomimes of the theatre are some of the most versatile, consummate, adaptable performers produced in the canon of the arts. And at that moment when a would-be entertainer is finally invited to shine at the Broadway caliber, he or she has indubitably landed a rather big break, and therefore further validated a certain status in the market we call, “show business.” Pronounced with humble beginnings in the mid-18th century, the Great White Way’s past is as tumultuous and victorious as our nation’s history. In 1750, Thomas Kean and Walter Murray initiated a residential theater company on Nassau Street in Manhattan. The 280-seat theatre predominately produced Shakespearean plays. A ballad opera entitled, “The Beggar’s Opera” would mark one of the earliest known theatrical productions before the prohibition of New York City theatre during the Revolutionary War. By the late 1800’s, burlesques popularized with the immigration of Lydia Thomas and her “British Blondes.” The musical, along with the induction of vaudeville, also began to disseminate, opening opportunities to female entertainers, producers and writers. Today, for a show to be considered “Broadway,” it must take place in one of the 40 distinctive, professional theaters in Manhattan’s Lincoln

Center or Theater District. Experiencing a Broadway show, for many, crowns the “to-do” list for Big Apple tourists. The shows running today have changed with the times, but remain as popular as they were in the wake of World War II, as the Broadway Theater League observed a 66% increase in ticket sales in the 2013 season in contrast to the season prior. Leading Ladies of Broadway Stacy Wolf, author of Changed for Good: A Feminist History of the Broadway Musical, argues that the Broadway musical both contributed to and shaped feminist history. “Gender inflicts and shapes every aspect of the musical,” Wolf states. “As soon as an actor steps foot onto the stage, the audience sees the actor’s gender and interprets that character accordingly.” Wolf goes on with the assertion that the evolution of female roles in Broadway shows reflects a history of the progression of female presence in society. In Shakespearean times, men typically portrayed even female characters, while the classic Broadway musicals in golden yesteryears often depicted women as strong, but repressed halves of a love story. According to Wolf, a turning point in U.S. history during the 1960’s prompted musicals to feature women in central roles as single, working girls, as seen in the Sally Bowles of Cabaret (1966), in the Charity Hope Valentine of Sweet Charity (1966) and in the Dolly Levi of Hello Dolly! (1964). Today, we see not only the celebration of female empowerment in a wide array of Broadway musicals, but also the celebration of female diversity in shows like Wicked, In the Heights and The Color Purple. In light of National Women’s History Month, RWM is examining the dynamic divas, past-and-present on Broadway, and the roles that defined them. 1. Mary Martin-Dominating the leads in productions like Peter Pan, South Pacific, Leave It To Me and The Sound of Music, the always feminine, always charming Martin managed to snag four Tony Awards over the duration of her career. With a stellar work ethic and consistent professional approach, Martin blazed the trail for preceding female leads in some of the most well-known and most cherished musicals of all time. 2. Ethel Merman-The brassy, bodacious matron of the stage could be heard miles before she arrived. No stranger to the spotlight, Merman popularized roles in thirteen original musicals, including, perhaps her most famous performances in Annie, Get Your Gun and Gypsy. Equipped with a booming set of pipes and unmatched wit, Merman will be forever remembered as the “First Lady of the musical comedy stage.” 3. Liza Minelli-The brood of a marriage that only Hollywood could generate, Ms. Minelli’s insurmountable talent proves that the apple falls not far from the tree. The daughter of cinematic legends Judy Garland and Vincente Minnelli, Liza (with a “Z”!) has owned her

success with immortalizing such roles as Flora in Flora, the Red Menace, Roxie Hart in Chicago and Victoria Grant in Victor/Victoria. 4. Bernadette Peters-A veteran of the Broadway stage, classic beauty Bernadette Peters is one of the most reputable, diverse performers of all time. With two Tonys and nine nominations under her belt, Peters has embraced every role, every challenge. Best known for her roles in George M, Into the Woods and Follies, Peters’ legendary vocal capabilities will forever mark her a star. 5. Kristin Chenoweth-The Good Witch of our hearts, the sprightly blonde may be synonymous with a portrayal of the sometimes egotistical, sometimes tender-hearted Glinda in Wicked. Beyond her magic wand, Chenoweth is an accomplished virtuoso of the theater, having landed the leads on Broadway in Funny Girl and You’re a Good Man, Charlie Brown. Once: Since 1957, the Rochester Broadway Theatre League has brought the Great White Way to the local arts community. This March, the Auditorium Theatre will be housing the national touring group of Once, a modern musical based on the 2006 film. Set in Ireland, Once tells the story of a disgruntled musician who encounters a beautiful Czech girl with a keen interest in his craft. As their romance unfolds, the music transforms into an ethereal experience bound to grip your heart. Winner of eight Tony awards, Once is a production that transcends the quintessential theater-going experience. It is unique in several aspects, including the rarity that all cast members also serve as the orchestra, manning their own respective instruments. Once also is the source for the Academy-Award winning song, “Falling Slowly.” RWM spoke with cast member Claire Wellin who will reprise her role as Réza in the off-Broadway production. Wellin was a member of the original Broadway cast, recruited, in part, for her finesse with the violin. Wellin invites Rochester to not only “abandon expectations of going to the theater” but to “ride the waves that is Once.” Wellin, who hails from Bismarck, Nebraska, graduated with a B.F.A. in Fine Arts from the University of Minnesota, Mankato. The offspring of classically-trained musicians, performing is in her blood. Meryl Streep, Judy Garland and Cyndi Lauper also served as artistic influences for Wellin: each of these women crossovers from the stage to the screen and back. A self-proclaimed “old school” jazz singer, Wellin also studied the likes of Billie Holiday and Ella Fitzgerald. When not touring, Wellin can be found accompanying one of her bands: “Youth in a Roman Field” is an indie group based out of Chicago as well as a folk collaborative called, “Glad Fanny.” To read more about Wellin’s endeavors, visit www.clairewellin.com. Once will be in Rochester March 18-23rd. To purchase tickets, please call (585) 222-5000 or order online at www.rbtl.org.

Isn’t it time you saw yourself in a new light?

Jeff Gerew now booking Spring sessions. Call or email today. 585-746-0974 • jeff@C7photo.com • www.C7photo.com 26

march 2014 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

Rocking Rochester

LOCAL WOMEN MAKING BEAUTIFUL MUSIC BY ASHLEY COOPER I PHOTOS BY JEFF GEREW

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Amanda Lee Peers In the 1950’s a boisterous cultural revolution shook the earth (quite literally) when the progressive phenomenon called, “rock and roll” entered the scene. How could a musical genre, with roots in such familial sounds as jazz, blues and western swing be so imposing upon a nation’s moral code? As with anything new, rock and roll was threatening: a style of music that was symbolic of a rebellious cultural revolt, a time of turbulence and therefore, much-needed change. Rock and roll, the novelty that never wore off, shaped an entire generation. As Larry Williams suggested, “Rock and roll has no beginning and no end for it is the very pulse of life itself.” As if rock and roll music was not threatening enough, a deluge of controversy, perhaps not yet depleted, stirred when women began identifying themselves with rock and roll music. This month, Rochester Woman Magazine invites you to experience the perspectives of a carefully-selected panel of highly favored local musicians, all female. Many of them commented on the trail-blazers for women in the music industry, particularly in the realm of rock and roll, or any musical situation in which, as Deborah Magone put it, “women are commanding the stage.”

In terms of pinpointing these early female pioneers, unafraid to resist the laws of conformity, Magone suggests that a good place to start is with a woman by the name of, “Sister Rosetta Tharpe,” who seems to posthumously have a cult-like following. Today, many are quick to forget her name, but little do they know that were it not for Tharpe,

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Michelle Sestito so-called the “Godmother of Rock and Roll,” there mightn’t have been such early rock forerunners as Jerry Lee Lewis, Little Richard, or “The King” himself—Elvis Presley. Perhaps decades before her time, Tharpe was one of the premier “crossover artists,” having popularized a gospel record into the mainstream circuit. Equipped with an animated stage persona, belting set of pipes and electronic guitar, Sister Rosetta inspired musicians across the gamut. Ultimately, Tharpe may have inadvertently paved the way for women in the industry with her contemporary Ella Fitzgerald. According to local “indie pop” harpist/vocalist Mikaela Davis, Fitzgerald is, “a lady with amazing phrasing, scatting, range and musical ability. I’ve idolized ‘Lady Ella’ since I discovered jazz. If anyone has ‘blazed the trail,’ it’s got to be her, in my opinion.” If you’ve had the pleasure of hearing Davis sing, you might liken the soft, ethereal quality of her voice to Fitzgerald’s. Davis goes onto say of her predecessors that, “we learn from the women of the past and present in the music industry that anything is possible! Take every opportunity you get.”

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Morgan Twins Just about the time that Sister Rosetta passed away, other brave and innovative female musicians dared to break out of the mold. Enter Janis Joplin and Grace Slick.

Melia

Joplin, a transcendent artist and veritable “game-changer” in the industry, deviated altogether from the traditional female performer of the era. She charismatically fronted three rock/blues bands before joining the likes of the star-studded Festival Express. Many modern-rockers are products of her influence.

By the 1970s, a slew of musically repressed women entered the forefront, again, defying the societal norm. Suzi Quatro was the first female bass guitarist to make the big time. Quatro, in turn, directly influenced yet another unsurpassed pioneer of rock and roll: Ms. Blackheart herself, Joan Jett.

Deborah Magone, who, at moments seems to channel her, was introduced to “The Pearl” before the age of ten. Other local artists record their earliest exposure to Joplin as clearly as any significant life event:

In our interviews, local headliners Amanda Lee Peers, Lisa Canarvis and Melia Maccarone all cite Joan Jett as a master vanguard.

“Shortly after I started performing, I had something happen that influenced the way I looked at everything I was doing,” recalls edgy singersongwriter Teagan Ward. “I was walking home from grabbing a bite to eat with a group of friends and on the side of the road, I found a CD. When I picked it up I read on the frontside ‘Janis Joplin: Greatest Hits.’… I popped the CD into the stereo in my bedroom and listened to it in its entirety. What I heard changed the way that I look at performing live all together. Janis put so much energy into not only her voice, but also her body while performing. She demanded everyone to not only listen but to watch just as closely, and I knew that this is how I wanted to be.” Ward credits Joplin, who tragically succumbed to the “Curse of 27” in 1970, as being a major perpetuator in the decision to head her own band. No listed entourage of female rock legends is complete without mentioning Jefferson Airplane’s lead singer, Grace Slick. Another revolutionary, Slick’s thunderous voice and audacious attitude left their mark in history. Owning one of the most enduring careers of her contemporaries, Slick also fronted Jefferson Starship, Starship and The Great Society.

When an all-girl rock band called, “The Runaways” showed up circa 1975, the masses dismissed the act as a passing fancy. Today, music critics are taking the breakout band more seriously, examining their repertoire with an elevated degree of reverence. The collective members of the band who popularized “Cherry Bomb” went on to enjoy success an independent performers, including Jett, Lita Ford and Cherie Currie. Succeeding the short-lived success of “The Runaways” were the Wilson sisters of “Heart,” Patty Smith, Chrissy Hynde of “The Pretenders,” Pat Benatar and Stevie Nicks, among others. The above-mentioned artists, along with countless others, have doubtlessly changed the way the world has approached this wonder-here-to-stay known as, “rock and roll.” “Where would music be without women?” asks Deborah Magone. “Women bring a whole different perspective to music: the lyrics, the melody, the point of view.”

In Their Blood

Among the dynamic,rochesterWomanMag.com versatile female artists we’ve interviewed, :: march 2014 29

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Lisa Canarvis most fell into music as a result of a genetic breakthrough. Alternative rocker Michelle Sestito explains, “I was born into it. My dad was a guitar player in Rochester. For me, it comes naturally.” Amanda Lee Peers fostered her talent within the church. “I grew up in the church,” she verifies. “My entire family was very involved so it was just the natural order of things for me to get involved as well. I attended a very charismatic church and music played a big part in the service. I think my passion for music stems from that. I saw firsthand how powerful music was to people and how influential and life changing it could be.” The Morgan Twins, who recently caught global attention on NBC’s hit reality show The Voice, call their astounding vocal abilities “a gift.” Neither one received professional training, yet others in our panel spent the better part of their lives under the tutelage of grand masters, such as Mikaela Davis, who was a member of the Rochester Philharmonic Youth Orchestra for four years. For the now outgoing, seemingly omnipresent Amanda Ashley, possessing a talent that separated her from the rest was sometimes unnerving. “From childhood through early adolescence, I was very nervous, and even somewhat embarrassed by my talent,” she divulges earnestly. “I always loved to sing, and had a desire to perform, but was afraid of being ridiculed, which gave me mild anxiety to jump on stage. I knew my vocals were different, and knew they were powerful, but feared how they would be perceived by my peers…Through the years which hormones, and the trials and tribulations of being a young 30 march 2014 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

Amanda Ashley

teenager began to settle in, I began writing songs as a way of coping and channeling any and all negative feelings and emotions I was going through.” When asked whether being a woman in the music industry presented any challenges, some of the artists we interviewed admitted to lingering sexism issues, while others commend the progress that’s occurred in recent years. “I’m fortunate to only run into a sexist action or comment every so often,” comments local rocker Melia Maccarone. “The business end is where I see more sexism or a man’s desire to feel dominant over me but I don’t anymore. Now I’ve found the right people and I’m lucky to have a trustworthy and incredibly supportive manager.” “Unfortunately,” Maccarone adds, “I have also run into issues with females. I’ve gotten rejected or even kicked off bills because I was a girl. According to the management, a girl next to a girl doesn’t look good. Yet, guys are next to guys all the time. So what is the industry portraying us as? Just

Mikaela Davis pretty faces? I personally think women need to stick together.” Michelle Sestito presents a positive report; her experiences have allowed her to cherish the positives of being a woman in the industry, though all the while, she balances a full-time job outside of music and raising a family. Amanda Ashley rarely encounters issues related to sexism, but admits that as a businesswoman, she fights to be taken seriously. Lisa Canarvis shares a similar experience: “Sometimes people who work in the scene and handle the business overlook you,” she says. “You could be in a group with three or four guys and they want to talk to ‘the guy’ in the band or they just assume it’s not you so they look and talk to everyone else. That can be annoying, but more often, I think it’s because a lot of women may look shy or appear standoffish and that can be interpreted as disinterested or detached.” The performance aspect of being a musician, the intimate connection with the audience, for many, is the opportunity to shine, to dismiss all conflicts or ill-will against confidence. “I love to perform,” shares Amanda Peers. “It’s where I get to let loose and really express myself. A lot of people who see me for the first time are surprised when I get onstage. I’m normally a quiet and composed person, but when I walk on that stage I really come out of my shell.” Rochester, home to the International Jazz Festival, is often alluded to as a city accepting and embracing of all arts. The gracious panelists agree, but not without revealing the drawbacks of being a local musician. Michelle Sestito explains that the majority of challenges rest in the competition with cover bands, and the lack of awareness.

Teagan Ward “We just got back from performing a few shows down south and I caught myself describing the Rochester music scene to a local performer with a great sense of pride,” says Teagan Ward. “I guess I had never really thought about it, but Rochester has been good to us, and continues to be. There is a great amount of opportunity here that stems from the history that this city holds and I am proud to say that this is where my musical beginnings are.” For aspiring musicians craving words of wisdom from veteran performers, Cara Morgan, who also works as a mental health therapist at Rochester General Hospital advises, “to take chances because you never know what could come out of it! Don’t let failure stop you from continuing to try.” Deborah Magone has enjoyed a long career and remarkable success all over the world. While she is content with her career as an artist, she shares: “I’d be even more content if everyone remembered to support and fight for independent live music, musicians and music programs in schools across America. It’s so important to the health and well-being of absolutely everyone.”

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OUR ROCKERS (From left to right) Teagan Ward, Morgan Twins, Melia, Michelle Sestito, Amanda Ashley, Amanda Lee Peers and Lisa Canarvis

rochesterWomanMag.com :: march 2014

Madonna OB/GYN is Accepting New Patients Welcoming New Patients To Madonna Ob/Gyn Offering a state of the art facility that provides all aspects of women’s health as well as Botox!

Catherine Falcon, NP • Sraddha Prativadi, MD • Madonna Tomani, MD, FACOG • Catalina Vial, MD • Christy Jackson, CNM If you are considering a new OB/GYN, come to our conveniently located state-of-the-art facility at Cambridge Place in Brighton, right off of I-590.

•We offer Comprehensive, Compassionate OB/GYN services focusing on women’s health and wellbeing in a serene and personalized atmosphere. Women’sHealthCare Call us at 585-698-7077 to schedule a complimentary Get Acquainted appointment.

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woman ::healthy

we’ve come a long by sraddha prativadi, md

The history of women and medicine over the last 100 years has seen remarkable developments and advances that have allowed us to witness a greater respect and consideration of health issues specifically related to women not only as patients, but as practitioners in the field of medicine as well. Increasing safety and decreasing deaths and illness related to pregnancy and childbirth and a confluence of influences that today allow us to enjoy a high-level of scientifically advanced care while experiencing a compassionate, feminine style of administration of medical care. We are achieving a greater balance of safe, scientific medical care that is mixed in with a humanistic approach to communication and administration of that care, allowing us, as women and men alike, to benefit from the intellectual advancements while retaining a human connection, which in and of itself is critical to positive outcomes, regardless of the healing modality used. Specifically since 1900, we have seen marked reductions in the number of women and infants who lost their lives to pregnancy and childbirthrelated events. This is mostly due to our increasing knowledge of and development of antibiotics, anesthetic techniques, improved surgical techniques and understanding, ability to screen for conditions at the biochemical level and prevent related injury, the access to safe medical facilities and a refinement of our knowledge of when to intervene. The women’s health profession has seen far-reaching changes over the past 300 years in the Western world. In the 1700s, the work of assisting women in labor was performed by other women, known as midwives, from the middle English word meaning “with woman”. This work was deemed completely separate to the work that was performed by those who called themselves physicians, who were all men. The world of pregnancy and childbirth was completely seen as a woman’s world and those in the medical profession were not involved. In fact, the attitude of that day seemed to be one of arrogance, with pregnancy and obstetrical care being perceived as not “fitting” of a physician’s activities. In the American colonies, it was not seen as decent for a man to attend childbirth, which was perceived as a woman’s event. As time passed, the medical profession found ways to be involved with obstetrical practices. Some new developments truly advanced the obstetrical and gynecologic care of women and infants but there also existed a dynamic that marginalized women’s knowledge at the time. There was increasing work in improving surgical interventions such as cesarean section that could help save the lives of infants and mothers in special situations, new gynecologic procedures being invented and overall advancement of general surgical knowledge. This initial engagement of medicine in the obstetrical world led to a development of a medicalization of childbirth that had both its advantages and faults. In the 1800s, we witnessed the creation of more reliable medical schools, the entrance of the first American woman, Elizabeth Blackwell into a medical school right here in the Finger Lakes Region of Western New York, and multiple milestones on surgical technique that clearly move forward medical care both for and by women. In the late 1800s, we saw ether first used for humanitarian intervention during childbirth. By the turn of the century, there were more women advocating for this compassionate intervention during childbirth to improve the labor experience. The first few decades of the 1900s saw pivotal medical developments that clearly demonstrated the advantages of medical interventions. Namely advances in infection control, antimicrobial therapy and anesthesia allowed for clear advances in women’s health and childbirth outcomes. By the 1920’s, however, a dangerous attitude of the “pathology“ of childbirth grew, leading

wayBaby

to an overly interventional culture surrounding childbirth, with medical interventions seen as the way to get rid of the risks inherent in pregnancy and childbirth. Between 1915 and 1930, our country saw no improvement in maternal and infant mortality outcomes despite establishment of prenatal care and aseptic technique, likely due to lack of access to care and due to this over-interventionalization. In the subsequent decades, the care of our women and infants has become more methodical, evidence-based, multi-faceted and successful in creating an extremely low maternal and infant mortality rate. While obstetrics can be unpredictable, with only a few minutes to respond in certain situations, we are able to provide a humanistic, beautiful birth experience. With the safety net of high level, reliable emergent medical care that can be critical to survival of women and infants. When unpredictable emergencies occur, we have the luxury of an interdisciplinary team of highly trained professionals who also oversee a non-interventional labor course. Because we are surviving birth and childbirth, something we take for granted nowadays, we can focus our intellectual and medical resources on developing knowledge in a multitude of areas of womenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s health. From counseling young girls on the menstrual cycle and prioritizing their educational development, to menopausal care; from assessment and detection of genetic risk factors to advanced robotic surgical techniques for cancer treatment; from prevention of pregnancy to aiding a couple in timing and achieving a conception, we are only touching the surface of the breadth and depth of care to which we are now privileged to have access. There is an increasingly balanced approach in the care of women in terms of assuming strengths, abilities and limitations of current medical approaches and an increasing respect and methodical inquiry into the non-physical aspects of care and what has been considered as traditional and sacred knowledge of women and healers. At the University of Rochester Medical Centerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Highland Hospital, where I feel blessed to be able to take care of women and families, I am constantly witness to a merging of the spiritual and the scientific, of the analytical and the humanistic aspects of modern medical care at multiple levels of the hospital across various specialties. This benefit is not only for women. I see men, as family members and practitioners, being more involved in the beautiful process of caring for women. Both at the start of life in the events of childbirth and the transitions associated with the end of functioning of the physical body, I witness men experiencing these events and expressing themselves from multiple aspects of their minds, intellects and souls. While there has been success in what we are able to achieve in medicine both from a scientific and humanistic perspective, we have much yet to achieve in making this care even more sophisticated and accessible to more human beings in our country and the world at large. As our scientific knowledge advances, and our language develops to be able to express the dynamics of the interface between the physical and non-physical, the modern and the traditional, the male and female characteristics of our cultures, I foresee a beautiful future where we have a sophisticated continuum of knowledge and care that allows us to tap into the healing potential at multiple layers of our anatomy, physiology, biochemistry, spirituality and energies even to the quantum levels. As women, I feel we are uniquely gifted to engage in this process of further development and creation of the healing arts and dissemination of this healing throughout the planet. Dr. Prativadi practices at Madonna OBGYN she can be reached at www. madonnaobgyn.com or by calling (585) 698-7077.

The ABIGAIL RIGGS COLLECTION

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The Abigail Riggs Collection was borne from founder Gail Riggs’ desire to teach her children, Abigail and John, about empowerment and generosity, about the pioneers who came before them, about the amazing women who often suffered great personal sacrifice to brighten our way, and about every mother’s loving desire to connect the next dot.

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The first project, “Purse with a Purpose”, carries a notable quote prominently placed on the backside of each bag, beside you, like an arm around your waist, reminding you of the strength and sisterhood stitched into our history. Limited editions and numbered: Ms. Anthony, Miss Bouvier, Miss Annie and the First Lady Series; each are intended to raise money for the causes these individuals pioneered. The Abigail Riggs Collection has partnered with like-minded nonprofits in order to give a percentage of the proceeds and raise awareness worldwide. Wear one, tell her story and connect the next dot…

MS. ANTHONY COLLECTION

All Susan B. Anthony purses are handmade and feature: hidden detachable Abigail Riggs Bee key chain; magnetic closure; measure 17” wide x 5” deep, standing 17” at the top of the handles.

THE NEW RIGGS SCARF

The Abigail Riggs Collection has launched their 100% silk scarf line this season to rave reviews in LasVegas and New York. Each is a piece of art to accessorize their core handbag lines. The honoree quote such as Susan B. anthony’s, “Failures Impossible,” that adorn each handbag also appear on the silk scarf. The inspirational affermation is designed to help change internal negative self talk to positive and is a form of cog nat 38

march 2014 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

FIRST LADY SERIES

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Handmade of premium patent leather; Detachable Abigail Riggs Collection Bee key chain; Encased in double tassel sleeper pouch. Lrg dimensions: 18.5” X 16” X 6.5” Sm dimensions: 15” X 14” X 5”

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MISS ANNIE COLLECTION Handmade of the highest quality leather and suede; Leather tassel accented with genuine turquoise pendant; Offered in 2 shades of brown leather; 12 inch x 12 inch pouch with an adjustable 43 inch leather strap w/ boondoggle; 8 inch extensions on both sides to allow strap to extend out to 51 inches; Encased in double tassel sleeper pouch.

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minute ::menopause

WHAT DO WE KNOW ABOUT HOT FLASHES IN MENOPAUSE? Byjames woods, md

It is 3 am and while in bed you are awakened by a sudden burst of heat in your face, neck and arms that forces you, now drenched in sweat, to throw off the covers, only then to shiver with chill. With up to 75% of women experiencing this phenomenon during the menopause transition and 10% for a lifetime, what do we know about the biology of hot flashes? Hot flashes are initiated by enhanced sympathetic activity within the brain in association with reduced ovarian estrogen production. Yet the occurrence of hot flashes correlates poorly with measured levels of plasma, urinary or vaginal estrogen. Hot flashes are , however, linked to elevated baseline plasma levels of norepinephrine metabolites in symptomatic women, which increase further during a hot flash. Estrogen’s actions in the brain during ovulation to reduce the response of sympathetic receptors may explain why, during estrogen withdrawal, enhanced sympathetic activity occurs. But how does this explain the clinical picture of hot flashes? Scientists have found that, during the reproductive years, a woman can adjust to a change in her environment of about 0 .4 degrees C without stimulating the hypothalamus, which is the thermoregulatory part of her brain. Entering a warm room, smoking a cigarette, or having spicy food before menopause does not seem to stimulate a central sympathetic response. This is referred to as the “thermoneutral zone.” Yet in the menopausal years, coincidental with a drop in estrogen levels, the thermoneutral zone disappears. This change has been reproduced in the animal model where administering norepinephrine into the blood also narrows the thermoneutral zone. Any small rise in temperature then triggers the hypothalamus into action with the goal to lower the body’s temperature. As a result one’s heart rate increases to direct capillary blood flow to the skin and moisture is released through the sweat glands, both intended to reduce one’s body temperature. Then a brief drop in body temperature occurs, the chill factor. Treatments using cognitive behavioral therapy or mind-body interventions such as yoga, hypnosis, or acupuncture effectively reduce one’s response to hot flashes, but have little or no effect on frequency. Nonetheless these approaches have been shown to improve one’s response to stress, sleep disorders, and depression. Moreover, dietary modification and weight loss have been shown to reduce vasomotor symptoms. Estrogen is the gold standard medication for treating hot flashes, usually reducing their incidence and severity. The effectiveness of other treatments must be judged against their placebo effect, the lessening of symptoms based on the woman’s expectation that the treatment will work. For those who cannot take systemic estrogens, treatment with Clonidine , a blood pressure medicine, Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors (SSRIs) fluoxetine, paroxetine or sertraline, (depression medicine), or gabapentin, an anticonvulsant, have all been reported to reduce hot flashes in 20 to 50% of women tested.

march 2014 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

James Woods, MD is the former Chair of the Department of Obstetrics and Gynecology at the University of Rochester School of Medicine.

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The Hess/Woods/Warshof Obstetrics and Gynecology practice specializes in perimenopausal and menopausal care and welcomes new patients to our practice. Patients are seen at 2255 South Clinton Avenue Rochester, NY 14618 To make an appointment, please call 585.271.7800

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matters ::local business

Leveling the Playing Field

By Amy Long | Photos by John Lee

Despite the fact that women make up approximately half of the auto-owning population, their place in the auto repair industry is still vastly underrepresented. Enter Robin Chiavaroli and Erin Hassall. The two women met and became fast friends along with Chiavaroli’s husband Paul, through a business relationship with Hassall’s husband, Jack. For some time, the two friends kicked around the idea of one day starting a business together and saw opportunity in a niche market that tended to take unfair advantage of women.

“We knew from the beginning we needed to market to women. Our waiting room is awesome. It’s the best. I started taking pictures of people sleeping on our couch. It’s a very homey feel. Everyone loves it. We have a fireplace in there, a sofa, leather chairs. It’s great,” said Chiavaroli. The two did not have to wait long for business to build. Right out of gate, customers old and new responded immediately to their unique business model. While Hassall and Chiavaroli run the show, handling back of the house business responsibilities, Hassall’s husband Jack handles the marketing and web site.

“We discussed how women often get raked over the coals in the auto industry, and how great it would be to have a woman run auto business,” said Chiavaroli.

Despite their responsibilities behind the scenes, the women always make it a point to connect with every new customer that walks through the door, and quickly respond to any customer concerns on the web site.

In 2008, Hassall’s husband Jack was looking to purchase a strip mall and in the process found the perfect location for their dream. With the support of both spouses, the women worked on their business plan and in 2010 closed the deal on both the mall and their shop.

What really motivates Chiavaroli and Hassall is the satisfaction of providing honest and quality service where other auto shops may fail.

“We took over an existing business called Express Fleet Service. We didn’t want to confuse the built in customer base, so we shortened the name to EFS Auto,” said Chiavaroli. Unfortunately, just six months after the launch, Chiavaroli’s husband died of cancer. Despite her grief, Chiavaroli knew she had to keep moving forward in honor of her late husband whose support had meant so much to her: “It was rough going but I decided to move forward. This was our dream. I just didn’t have the heart to not do it.” Neither Chiavaroli or Hassall came from an auto mechanic background, but they had the former fleet business service manager and two long time technicians on their side. “We got lucky. They had well over 70 years of combined experience, so we formed a team for success. They really embraced our idea and who we were, and they’ve been very loyal which is rare in the auto industry from what I’ve learned.” In addition to an experienced service team, the women created an aesthetically comfortable environment that breaks with traditional, testosterone run auto shops.

“Recently, a gentleman called on behalf of his mother who knew nothing about cars and had been quoted over 600.00 for a repair at another shop. She was anxious about it and called her son. We told him to bring the car in for us to check it out. We diagnosed the problem and repaired it for 185.00 and still made a profit. That happens more than you could imagine.” Chiavaroli continued, “I just don’t understand how anyone thinks that is good business. One, treat people the way you want to be treated, two how do you sleep at night, and even if you do, how is that a good business model?” For these two Rochester natives, success is proportionate to their genuine dedication to their customers and filling a long overdue service need for both women and men. “We get new customers every day, either from the web site, our excellent customer reviews, and word of mouth. And it’s not just women. We get a lot of men who don’t know as much about cars and are tired of being ripped off.” While women have certainly leveled the playing field in the new millennium, some stubborn gender gaps are taking a little longer to fill. Fortunately, for car owners of both sexes, Chiavaroli and Hassall show no signs of going backwards.

words ::in her own

If I can doAnyone It Can! By Linda Richards

I am a 41 year old mother of three. Growing up I was always “thick” and considered myself fat, in High School I was 185, and at 5’10” that wasn’t terrible, but I got my fair share of being called “thunder thighs.” At 18, I was pregnant with my first child and at that point my weight began sky rocketing to over 200lbs, I felt as though I was out of control. I went to doctor after doctor but got the same answer… stop eating so much. I tried, and I exercised, but nothing I did seem to make a difference. Finally I found a doctor that would listen to me; he diagnosed me with a thyroid disorder, something I had since before having

march 2014 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

children! When I was diagnosed with Thyroid cancer in 1999 my weight was well over 250lbs, I had two surgeries to remove my entire thyroid, followed by two years being filled with doctors’ appointments, radioactive chemotherapy and trying to fight that disease. I received my first cancer free scan in late 2001, I had fought back and won, take that cancer! Too bad my weight was over 285lbs.

Having won the battle against cancer I was ready to get back to life, in 2005 I started working for non-profit organization

words

::in her own

helping underprivileged women. I threw myself into my job as I loved having the ability to help people make a better life for themselves. When my program’s budget was cut in 2010 I was devastated, not being able to find another job didn’t help my depression, looking at the scale to see that somewhere I had crossed the 300lbs line really didn’t help. I had reached a new low in self-esteem a new high in weight, I was morbidly obese, and my fat was literally killing me! What I saw before me was a lifetime of obesity related issues and Type 2 diabetes, I had beaten cancer for crying out loud, this fat was not going to beat me! It was time to be devoted to making a better life for myself. This new resolve was great, but having tried and failed at just about every program that came across my television at two o’clock in the morning was not boosting my confidence at all. This with the fact that I didn’t have a thyroid, had two bad knees and a laundry list of reasons why I was so overweight (many of them legitimate) it was going to take a real change in mindset. My turning point was October 6th, 2010, one month after I lost my job, I pulled up to a local 24-hour gym and did something I never thought I would do… I joined, weighing now 318lbs. I had never been a member of a gym before, I was more of a “suffer at home” type of exerciser, not wanting to flaunt my uncoordinated, out of shape fitness prowess. The fact that this gym was open 24 hours was perfect! I was able to go to the gym at odd hours so I would not be seen. I did not want people to look at me and judge me for being so overweight. Slowly, I started care more about how I felt as opposed to what I thought others were thinking and surrendered to non-nocturnal gym hours. It was a slow process at first and I concentrated just on getting my exercise and didn’t pay much attention to my eating. Once I saw a little weight slowly come off, I decided I could make little changes in what I eat, nothing too drastic, just small changes like whole wheat bread and trying to not taking that second helping. In January of 2011 our gym held a “Biggest Loser” competition, I was now under 300 pounds, and it was a huge step for me to allow someone that didn’t have a stethoscope around their neck to see how a scale was judging me. The competition was 16 weeks long and during it I discovered a competitive side, at the end I had lost 65 pounds and secured first place, ahead of two men, I have

to add. I couldn’t remember the last time I had weighed under 250 and it felt wonderful, so wonderful I signed up for a half marathon! I crossed the finish line in August, I never imagined being able to accomplish this. It ignited something weird in me, some kind of odd confidence in my ability, I wasn’t the fastest but I did it! I decided it wasn’t about the scale anymore, it was about stepping out of my comfort zone and finishing something I started. This is something I very rarely had done in the past when it came to exercise or fitness. This new found confidence in myself gave me a “go big or go home” attitude and I thought why not sign up for the American Diabetes Association “Tour de Cure”? Ride 100 miles? No problem! (Should I mention that I couldn’t remember the last time I had rode a bike?) While training for the 100 mile ride, I was able to make my goal weight of 163 pounds and fit in to a size 4 down from a 24! Working with the ADA through the Tour de Cure made me realize how blessed I was to be able to gain control of my health and stop Type 2 diabetes in its tracks. Riding the 100 miles with hundreds of other riders was overwhelming, powerful and inspiring. The transformation from 320 pounds to 163 not only changed my health and appearance but every aspect of my life. I became a personal trainer and weight loss coach the very gym where I began my journey, having found a career that helps me help others take control of their health. I learned to take control of my eating, my life and my health, if I could do it with no thyroid, two bad knees and a long list of excuses… anyone can! I no longer believe in the word excuse.

“

The transformation from 320 pounds to 163 not only changed my health and appearance but every aspect of my life.

rochesterWomanMag.com :: march 2014

becoming the ::fitness

By Anissa Buckley

Radiant

“You will burn more calories, experience lean muscle growth, break through fitness plateaus, achieve personal bests, more easily perform activities of daily life and have more fun. You will experience a level of well being and radiance you only noticed in others until now…………….” Ok, sounds like an advertisement for a supplement or a new breakthrough diet. But it’s not. Instead, the topic at hand is an exercise format that is being touted as the #1 trend in exercise for 2014 by IDEA Health & Fitness Association. It’s called HIIT, pronounced “heat” or High Intensity Interval Training. The reason for its popularity is because it really does deliver on all that is noted above, namely that you will lose more fat and burn more calories than with other forms of exercise, which will ultimately make living your life easier and happier. HIIT delivers on these results because, during the classes, your heart rate is elevated to about 90% of its maximum level, for periodic bursts. This type of training is more intense than other forms of exercise, so that even your recovery requires more energy, or calories, thus increasing your metabolism. As an example, you may move from rowing as fast as you can, to slamming medicine balls on the floor, to holding a plank or push-up position. The concept is that you keep moving, from one exercise, to the next, with only a small break in between to catch your breath. Not only is it great for burning fat and weight loss, but it’s enjoyable and social as well. HIIT classes are designed so that you will never experience the same class twice. Instructors are trained on “modules” or segments which they can then pair together in an infinite number of ways to keep the class from getting stagnant or boring. Classes are often run competitively in either a partnered or team format. As an example, you may be partnered at the beginning of class with another class member. The instructor may ask you to row 200 meters on the rowing machine as fast as you can. In the meantime, your partner is holding a push-up, or plank position, for as long as it takes you to complete rowing the 200 meters. You can see how your partner has a vested interest in cheering you on! All in all, this new type of exercise is getting results for people who have previously failed to see results with traditional exercise. The continuous plod on the treadmill becomes familiar to your muscles, tendons and ligaments after a period of time, so your metabolism slows to reserve energy. With HIIT, your muscles are constantly confused. They are asked to transition from leg exercises, like squatting, which use gluteus muscles, to upper body exercises like rowing which uses tricep and deltoid muscles. This takes more energy from your body to support the constant change, hence increasing your metabolism. By now, you may be thinking “hey, this sounds like a great way to train for the Olympics, but it’s not for me”. If that’s what you’re thinking, then I challenge you to think again. One of the best perks of HIIT is that everyone can move at their own pace. Today, you may only be able to hold a plank position for 10 seconds, however, those ab muscles that are screaming at you in the first class tighten up quickly and within 2 weeks, you’ll find yourself holding a 60 second plank. You’ll continue to notice other areas of improvement in everyday living. Grabbing grocery bags from the car becomes easier and taking that flight of stairs at home no longer leaves you breathing hard. So, the next time you attend a party and see that specimen of ultimate health and fitness across the room, baring her well-defined biceps and triceps in her sleeveless top, don’t hesitate to approach her. Ask her about her exercise plan and, more often these days; you’ll hear her tout the positive benefits of the new type of exercise class called HIIT. Or……..what you may also find is others, approaching YOU, to hear about how you’re looking so healthy, fit and radiant! Turn up the HIIT and lose that winter layer! Cheers!

march 2014 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

Anissa Buckley is President of Real Life Food and Fitness, a “first of a kind” weight loss program that combines a fresh, satisfying meal program with fun, high intensity workouts in a motivational team environment.

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::special

feature

goin

march 2014 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

Certainly no stranger to hard work, this dedicated athlete has big plans for her future. Jessica Walker, a Rochester native, is part of the 2014 Development Team for the 2018 Winter Olympics. Currently training in Lake Placid, N.Y., Walker hopes to compete in the Olympic Skelton run and represent the United States in the next winter games.

From here, Walker will train on the development team and really show what she’s got. Her determination will be key as she moves towards team competitions to produce good times, and will have opportunities to compete in several skill competitions over the coming months. Two days of timed runs down the ice will determine what circuit she will be placed in for traveling competitions.

Walker got her athletic start when she was involved in basketball and track during her high school years at Aquinas. After graduating in 2008 she went on to Buffalo State University, where she became a track All-American athlete.

Walker will gain experience and build her resume as she competes across the world, working towards the National team. At the end of the summer a national competition will determine if Walker has earned her place on the 2018 U.S. Olympic team.

After graduating with a double major in forensic chemistry and biochemistry, Walker returned to her alma mater for a visit where she met new conditioning trainer, Nathan Young. Walker noted that Young recognized her drive and ambition and suggested she look into bobsled.

“The Olympics are every athlete’s dream,” says Walker. “I get to start fresh and try to perfect it as much as I can.”

“My experiences at Buffalo State gave me the drive and determination to get where I am, in one year everything came together,” comments Walker. By May 2013, Walker was ready to showcase her bobsledding skills in Lake Placid at the “Combine Test”-- the first step to getting on the Olympic development team. After her performance, development coach Don Hass suggested that she take a trip down the ice on the sled, and make the transition to Skeleton. Requiring similar abilities needed for track, like speed and initial push, Walker connected with the sport immediately.

Beyond her Olympic dreams, Walker ultimately wants to help people. Her dual degree was only the first step in her ultimate career goal—being a doctor. “I just have a lot of plans. I want something to fall back on so I’m never scrambling,” she notes. Walker is considering pediatric oncology: “I think that job requires someone stern, yet passionate. The family-to-family support is amazing and even to just change one life for even a second would be a good feeling.” Well, she surely has a lot on her plate, but this determined athlete thrives on the inspiration that surrounds her. “In track, it was an individual competition, but for the greater good of your team. Skeleton is the same thing; it’s for the greater good of the team, and with the Olympics, the country.”

As a second- degree taekwondo black belt, Walker has never been afraid of hard work. Being new to the sport and the only woman to make the 2014 development team for this round proves that it all pays off and puts her on the road to the Olympics.

After talking with Jessica, there’s no doubt she’s determined, strong, and ready to prove herself and achieve her Olympic goals. Her background will give her the competitive edge to get to South Korea in 2018.

In less than a year, all of Walker’s plans had changed, but having a strong and skilled athletic background helped Walker as she took on this new sport.

“I’ve always been self-motivated, and once I have a goal in mind I always do everything I can to get there. I used to be too hard on myself, but I’ve learned to adjust to things and take them all as learning experiences.”

“I didn’t even know what skeleton was,” she says. “But I love learning, I love that this is giving me an opportunity to develop. These people share my drive, so it’s enjoyable.” It’s a lengthy process to get to the Olympic Games with several integral parts to complete along the way. With a positive attitude, Walker is optimistic that she has a fair shot.

feature

By Hayley Stauss I photo by john lee

::special

ng for Gold

Editor’s note: Training for the Olympics is not only hard work but is very expensive. Jessica is currently working to raise money to fund her training efforts. If you would like to contribute and help this local athlete represent Rochester in the 2018 Olympic games in South Korea, visit: www.gofundme.com/gojessicawalker.

rochesterWomanMag.com :: march 2014

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Inspire

rochester women

Amy Bell

Mrs. Rochester and Sales Associate with Premium Mortgage

By Brandy Whitbourne | Photo by Stephen Reardon

Contending with life as a shy, awkward teenager lacking selfconfidence, Amy L. Bell was determined to make a change. Not knowing where to begin, she finally found her true inspiration through entering and participating in pageantries. At a mere 16 years old, Bell entered the Miss Upstate NY Teenager Pageant with no prior runway experience; Bell left the competition poised with a fresh outlook. “I made a vow to myself on that day to change, grow and work really hard on my self confidence,” said Bell. “I went back to the same pageant the following year and claimed the title of Miss Upstate New York Teenager by beating out 43 contestants from our surrounding counties. That was the start for me. Pageants have made me the person I am today and I have not given up my passion.” Bell would go on to run her own pageant business, Les Bells Pageants, for eight years. Les Bells held five state titleholders and a first runner-up every year. “We did Rochester proud,” said Bell. “But, you can’t talk the talk without walking the walk and that is why I still compete in pageants today. I was Mrs. New York United States in 2001 and have been trying to capture the title of Mrs. New York America. I want to be just like one of my best friends, Melissa, who was successfully able to accomplish this feat. I came in close with two 2nd place runner-up finishes and one 1st runner-up finish, but the title seems to be out of my grasp. I currently hold the title of Mrs. Rochester and I feel this is an honor to be able to represent our community in a positive light.” Born in Buffalo, NY, Bell moved to Rochester at the age of three and has happily resided here ever since. She attended Syracuse University and came back to this city to enter the workforce. “I worked for HSBC Mortgage Corporation for 19 years and was promoted all the way up to Assistant Vice President,” said Bell. “I was number one in unit sales for mortgage lending since 1995. But sadly, the company was going through some major changes and I had to find a new place of employment. I moved to Premium Mortgage in February 2011. Since then, I have been named number one in sales for 2012 and 2013. In addition, we opened my own satellite office in Geneseo, NY and am titled the, ‘Queen of Livingston County’ for mortgage financing. This definitely goes along with my pageant career. I believe in tying both worlds together and give my real estate agents a top five award ceremony, the winner receives a crown,” said Bell. This year, Bell is being put to the test having been asked by the Woman’s Council of Realtors to revamp their annual Breast Cancer Awareness Fashion Show. The event is being held at the Harro East Ballroom on September 19, 2014. “I am truly excited about this new opportunity,” said Bell. “We are making some very large changes this year and will be opening the event to the public. I am looking forward to making the event ‘pop’ and ‘sparkle’: two of my most favorite words. So many of us have been touched by (continued on page 54) rochesterWomanMag.com :: march 2014

inspire :rw

“I loved history in school, but I always saw myself being creative in design, so I design the exhibits.” Larry Ann Evans

Executive Director of the Museum of Wayne County History By Bethany Comella | Photos by Stephen Reardon

Larry Ann Evans’s path to history was not a straight one, though she never regretted taking it. Now the Executive Director of the Museum of Wayne County History, the position is one in which she never saw herself. “I came to history in a roundabout way,” Evans said, “because I didn’t major in it or anything like that. I left Lyons to try to break into the film industry as an actress.” After graduating high school, she moved to San Diego for college, then Los Angeles, San Francisco, and eventually Spain. All told, she spent over a decade in the film industry, working alongside stars such as Jay Leno, Robin Williams, and Marlon Brando. After having her son while in Spain, Evans returned to Lyons with her family to take care of her parents, by then in their later years. Her mother passed away within a year and her father a year later. But she remained, despite the fact that Wayne County was a long way from Hollywood. She found creative outlets, however, working with local radio station WACK, as there was no film industry in the area. She spent five years with the station. Evans had her own historical connections to Lyons and Wayne County, though at the time she still was not connected with the museum. Her great-grandfather, Jerry Collins, was Deputy Sheriff of Wayne County for over fifty years, retiring in 1934. His son, Evans’s grandfather Cornelius, was also Deputy Sheriff for several years, underneath his father. Cornelius contracted tuberculosis, so the family moved to Colorado for 16 years, when Evans’s mother, Ann Collins, was a small child. In Colorado, Ann took to riding horses, frequently performing tricks atop them. She brought her love of horses back to Lyons, where Collins graduated from Lyons High School. Professionally still known as “Ann Collins” following her marriage, Evans’s mother became well-known as an equine artist. Her father trained and bred racehorses, and the two – with a young Larry Ann in tow – traveled up and down the East Coast, following the track, until Evans reached high school, when they settled in Lyons. Following her parents’ deaths, Evans was able to reconnect with her family history at the Museum of Wayne County History. She began volunteering at the museum, working on the newsletter, and was eventually asked by the board of directors to work on a fundraiser, the “Lock Up and Jail ‘Em.” “Sure, I can do that,” she said. The fundraiser was a great success for the museum, raising close to $10,000, and Evans was approached by the board to become the Executive Director, as the museum had lost theirs several months prior. Evans officially came on board in 2007. Although living in Lyons meant largely abandoning the film industry, her position with the Museum has provided the perfect creative outlet. (continued on page 54)

inspire

::rw

“Success is hard work and a measure of how much you have helped others.” Ruth Perrin

Assistant to the President, Van Bortel Group By Krista Bellardo | Photo by Brandon Vick

In what many would consider a male-dominated industry, Ruth Perrin has made a name for herself in the automotive business. Working alongside Kitty Van Bortel, the mogul behind the Van Bortel dealerships, Perrin has learned what it takes to be successful not only in business, but in the community in which one serves. And more often than not—she’s found that hard work and a genuine passion are utmost essentials. The Van Bortel group has had enormous success at each of its dealerships, including the Used Car Center that was the start of it all. Van Bortel Subaru has become one of the top selling Subaru dealerships in the country, while the Ford dealership is one of the most successful in the multi-state area. “We really care,” said Perrin. “It starts at the top with Kitty and then all of the managers, too. Everyone has bought in on the fact that the customer of the utmost importance.” After graduating high school in Rome, N.Y., Perrin went on to study business administration, marketing and finance at the State University of New York at Oswego. She has a diversified background, working in the automotive industry for just a few years before spending 6 years in the communications field. It wasn’t until 18 years ago that she started working as a business and finance manager at Van Bortel. In 1998, just two years after she started working for Van Bortel, she was awarded Employee of the Month. As the business expanded and the Ford dealership was started, Perrin took on her current role as assistant to the president, a position that allows her to do a multitude of things. She does customer care and service, marketing programs, event planning and assists President Kitty Van Bortel in other special projects. “The best parts of my job are being able to help the customers and being able to help our employees,” said Perrin. “I’m a good liaison between the departments, the employees and the customers.” At the Van Bortel dealerships, this customer relationship is what Perrin says Kitty has built her business around. Whether they’re buying a new car, getting their car serviced or just coming in for information on a particular model, Van Bortel dealerships focus all transactions on creating an experience where customers feel welcome and comfortable. Like many successful women, Perrin works to find the perfect balance between her professional and personal roles. As a wife and mother, she still finds time to walk her golden retriever every day, read as often as possible and explore nature whenever she can. “Balance is a very important word,” said Perrin. “You still have to have a home life. You still need to have fun and take care of yourself, eat healthy and get exercise in addition to your work and helping others.” In the community, Perrin is a Friend of the Honeoye Falls(continued on page 54)

rochesterWomanMag.com :: march 2014

amy bell

Larry Ann Evans

ruth perrin

breast cancer in some way, me included, and am looking forward to bringing attention to this cause. This is my opportunity to help increase our fundraising for WCR and our charitable event.”

“This is the thing now,” Evans said, “basically museums are looking for a creative publicist type – it’s a design-oriented promoter. And the boards are doing more of the curating – collections, care, working with the collections, and the history. The boards take care of a lot of that now.”

Mendon Rotary Club. She also participates in many Chamber of Commerce activities. For Perrin, getting to help the people of the local community who are in real need of a helping hand is the most rewarding part.

(cont)

inspire

For anyone pining for a career in sales or entertaining the notion of pageant competitions, Bell advises to be true to who you are. Don’t try to fit in with the crowd but rather let your voice be heard:

::rw

(cont)

“My advice as Mrs. Rochester has always been to, ‘follow your dreams, wherever they may take you.’”

“I loved history in school, but I always saw myself being creative in design, so I design the exhibits, design the newsletter, the postcards, the posters – I love all that.” The museum is not Evans’s only local creative outlet. She also serves on the Board of Directors for the Geneva Theater Guild, and coordinates their youth theater. She has been involved in several of the adult productions in the past, and right now is directing two shows simultaneously – “Spamalot” at Geneva High School, and “Everything I Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten” at St. FrancisSt. Stephens in Geneva. Aside from a creative outlet, the position with the museum has also given Evans the opportunity to further explore her roots with the building, the town, and the county. Evans’s mother was already featured in a permanent exhibit showcasing her equine paintings, and a likeness of her grandfather, Sheriff Jerry, still sits at his desk inside the museum.

(cont)

“My job in all of those things is that I’m just a worker,” said Perrin. “I love to help whenever I can.” In 2006, Perrin was honored with the Paul Harris Award from her fellow Rotarians, an award that recognizes helping people in the community, being an outstanding citizen and looking out for others. For women looking to follow in Perrin’s footsteps, she noted that one of the biggest things she has learned from working so closely with Kitty is that your reputation is one of your most important assets. Working to maintain and uphold that reputation every day is the key. “Success is hard work and a measure of how much you have helped others, whether it’s your customers, your employees or the whole community,” said Perrin.

march 2014 EVENTS CALENDAR

Flights of Winter Fancies

8 An Evening of Wishes

15 Experience Italy with Hope Hall

15-23 The Home and Garden Show

22-23 Gilda’s Guys Bachelor Auction

Organization: The Hochstein School of Music Time: 3:00-5:00pm5:30PM to Midnight Where: Hochstein School of Music Website: hochstein.org Organization: Make-A-Wish Foundation Time: 4:30PM Where: Locust Hill Country Club Website: wny.wish.org Organization: Hope Hall Time: 6:00 pm Where: Italian American Sports Club Website: www.hopehall.org Organization: The Rochester Home Builders’ Association Time: 10:00AM to 5:00PM Where: The Rochester Riverside Convention Center Website: www.rochesterhomebuilders.com Organization: Gilda’s Club Rochester Time: 6:00pm Where: Harro East Ballroom Website: www.gildasclubrochester.org

Residential programs

July 5 –26, 2014

Music Horizons

Collegiate experience for classical high school musicians June 29–July 11, 2014

Summer Jazz Studies

Collegiate experience for jazz high school musicians July 13–25, 2014

Eastman at Keuka

Music on the lake for middle school students Institutes

Percussion Trombone Trumpet Viola Saxophone UR Connection

Design a full-day camp with pre-college courses at the university of Rochester and music classes at the eastman School of Music

esm.rochester.edu/summer

rochesterWomanMag.com :: march 2014

feature ::special

Too Soon to say

‘Good-Bye’

According to his mother, however, Hoffman caught the acting bug rather serendipitously when an unforeseen injury in high school quelled a prior dream of becoming an athlete. In May 2013, Judge Marilyn Hoffman O’Connor revealed to Rochester Woman Magazine: “His whole identity was gone, so he ended up acting in the school play. He played Corporal Radar O’Reilly in the play M.A.S.H. After his first night, he made a comment to me… ‘Out of all the home runs I hit, touchdowns I’ve made and bases I stole, it never added up to that moment on stage.” O’Connor never deterred her son from following his dreams and Hoffman, in return, attributed the success of his performance in Capote (2005) to her. When delivering his Oscar acceptance speech, Hoffman publicly acknowledged O’Connor, proudly beaming in the audience. “…And my mom’s name is Marilyn O’Connor and she’s here tonight,” he thoughtfully concluded. “I’d like you to, if you see her tonight, congratulate her, because she brought up four kids alone. She deserves a ‘congratulations’ for that. We’re at the party, Ma you know?” After a well-deserved, rippling applause, Hoffman continued, “She took me to my first play and she stayed up with me to watch the NCA Final Four. Her passions became my passions. Be proud, Mom, because I’m proud of you.” The entertainment industry is bursting at the seams with good actors. We are so profoundly affected by Hoffman’s tragic ending because…it is not that he was merely a “good actor,” he was, in fact, a great one; critics are labeling Hoffman as one of the greatest actors of his generation. He had the unmatched capability to seize not only a viewer’s entire scope of attention in one scene, but to seize one’s unadulterated sympathies, one’s trust and one’s affection—even when portraying the most hopeless and tortured of souls. As film editor David Fear best put it in his Rolling Stone tributary article, “No modern actor was better at making you feel sympathy for…idiots, failures, degenerates, sad sacks and hangdogs dealt a bum hand by life, even as, no— especially when-he played them all with their worst qualities front and center. But Philip Seymour Hoffman had a range that seemed all-encompassing, and he could breathe life into any role he took on.” Hoffman, who appeared in over 60 films as an actor, was known for wholly and unabashedly submerging himself into his roles. When reviewing his legendary repertoire of work left behind, I noted the striking phenomenon in losing all trace of the down-to-earth, everyman humanity of Hoffman as he essentially became those characters. According to Fear, “Hoffman didn’t just make you believe that he was Truman Capote, the role for which he won an Oscar, or a

feature

Perhaps Rochester felt the blow of actor Philip Seymour Hoffman’s untimely demise a little harder on February 2nd, 2013. It was here, after all, that the Fairport native first entertained notions of becoming an actor. The craft, for Hoffman, initially rose to consciousness at the age of twelve after viewing a local production of Arthur Miller’s “My Three Sons.”

megalomaniac villain in Mission: Impossible III. He made you feel connected to these people, no matter how far out or fantastic they were. He made you feel for them, period.” Those who knew Hoffman remember him as remarkably generous, kind and fiercely dedicated to the craft. After graduating from Fairport High School in 1985, Hoffman attended New York University’s Tisch School of the Arts and achieved a BFA in Drama in 1989. By 1995, Hoffman had appeared in several films, including Scent of a Woman, When a Man Loves a Woman and Nobody’s Fool, and joined the LABryrinth Theater Company where he would later serve as artistic co-director.

::special

“I think you should be serious about what you do because this is it. This is the only life you’ve got.” –Philip Seymour Hoffman

Over the course of his career, he would give one flawless performance after another; Roger Ebert labeled him “one of the best new character actors…able to take a flamboyant role and find the quiet details in it.” Whether he was portraying an uptight, pandering personal assistant in the Coen Brothers’ The Big Lebowski, a sweaty, hot mess of a storm chaser in Twister, a larger-than-life music critic in Cameron Crowe’s Almost Famous or a tormented priest in Doubt, Hoffman was always disturbingly raw, heartbreaking, tender…edgy. His performances will forever haunt and inspire their viewers at large. Rochester Woman Magazine is shocked and saddened by this significant loss. We will never forget Mr. Hoffman’s sincerity and graciousness, humbly extending himself to this publication last spring when we featured a piece on his exceptional mother, Judge Marilyn Hoffman O’Connor. We offer our deepest sympathies to his family.

“

Philip Seymour Hoffman had a range that seemed allencompassing, and he could breathe life into any role he took on.” --film editor David Fear

”

rochesterWomanMag.com :: march 2014

women ::tips for

Prepping to Sell: Six Tips to Be Spring Market Ready

If you are among the hundreds of people getting ready to put their house on the market in Rochester, then these six helpful tips are designed with you in mind! Whether you are a first-time seller or a seasoned veteran, these tips never go out of style.

1) Find An Awesome Real Estate Partner. It may seem self-serving to make this the first tip, yet I truly believe the best thing you can do for yourself is to find someone you work well with to guide you through this process. If you do not have a trusted real estate partner, I recommend interviewing several to compare your options. Find someone with high energy and drive who takes a proactive approach to selling. Make sure he or she embraces technology and online marketing because the internet is the top place buyers find homes today. 2) Know Your Numbers. Make sure you understand how much you owe on the property, including your primary mortgage and any home equity loans. Once you determine your list price with your agent, you will have a better understanding of how much equity you can roll into your next home. Your agent will also review closing costs with you to understand your true net gain or loss. Knowing your numbers up front will help avoid any surprises down the road like the need for a short sale. 3) Have a Plan. Where are you going to next? Do you have enough equity in your current home to be able to afford your dream home? Should you sell your house first and then put an offer in on a home, or vice versa? These are common questions I am asked, and the answer

really depends on current market conditions in your specific area. Your real estate partner will help you determine the best strategy for success. 4) Make a FABULOUS First Impression. There’s a saying in our industry that the first impression is the only impression. I couldn’t agree more. Focus on curb appeal and staging techniques that will make your house shine in photos. In terms of getting your house “market ready”, I like to follow these four rules: de-personalize, de-clutter, clean and neutralize. Less is more with staging so keep it simple. 5) Don’t Over-Improve. There are many misconceptions about the ROI of home improvement projects, likely due to many TV shows that portray homeowners investing $50k into a new kitchen and increasing their home’s value by $60k. We do not see those types of returns in our market. Therefore, if your goal is to sell soon, I stress low cost projects like removing wallpaper, painting and updating light fixtures. Consult with your agent about improvements that will give you the best bang for your buck. 6) Be Prepared to Move Quickly. If you price it right and have your home in pristine condition, it should move quickly in this market. Have an attorney selected so you don’t have to find one at the last minute. Gather important documents like your abstract, certificates of compliance and any warranty info. This will help your agent move quickly when the time is right! Susan Glenz I Licensed Real Estate Salesperson Keller Williams Realty I 2000 Winton Road S, Building 1, Rochester NY 14618 I www.facebook.com/SusanGlenzTeam

Real Estate. Like it’s never been done before. See what others are saying about their experience! Facebook.com/SusanGlenzTeam

Susan Glenz | Real Estate Salesperson Keller Williams Realty 2000 Winton Rd South Bldg 1, Rochester, NY 14618 Office: 585.340.4940 SusanGlenz@kw.com 58Email: march 2014 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

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::special

feature

women&skin cancer Facts You Should Know By Lesley Loss, MD

Did you know that skin cancer is the most common form of cancer in the United States? Melanoma, a potentially fatal type of skin cancer, is the seventh most common cancer for females and represents 4% of all cancers in women. While women under age 40 have the greatest probability of developing melanoma skin cancer, there has been a frightening rise in the rate of non-melanoma skin cancer over the past few decades. In the last 30 years, the incidence of basal cell and squamous cell carcinoma has increased by 200% and 700% respectively! The rising incidence of skin cancer is related to a number of external factors that cannot be easily quantified. The reality: there is rarely one causal factor; instead it is a complex interplay of recurrent damage to the skin with defective repair mechanisms. It is also true that an individual’s genetic background changes their susceptibility, and people with a family history of skin cancer are at increased risk themselves. The greatest risk is from exposure to UV radiation, either in the form of sun exposure or tanning bed use. Contrary to popular belief, one is not “healthier” than the other. Getting a “base tan” before vacation increases the risk for developing skin cancer (one session results in an increase in risk for melanoma of 20%, basal cell carcinoma 29% and squamous cell carcinoma 67%) and accelerates premature photo-aging. An alternative if travelling somewhere warm where you will be in the sun is strict moderation of sun exposure, avoidance of peak hours (mid-day), seeking shade, wearing sun protective clothing (with UPF) and frequent re-application of broad spectrum UVA/UVB SPF 30 or higher. Remember that the risk of melanoma doubles with five or more lifetime sunburns or a single blistering sunburn in childhood or adolescence. So what about Vitamin D you might ask? Many people living at our latitude are vitamin D insufficient and I commonly hear people refer to daily sun exposure as their “daily dose of vitamin D.” Keep in mind that there is no difference in your body’s handling of vitamin D taken orally versus that synthesized in the skin by exposure to UV rays. Oral supplements containing vitamin D are labeled with the dose in International Units (IU), whereas vitamin D generation from UV exposure is not easily quantified. Ultimately, the jury is out on what the ideal vitamin D level is for an individual, but if you ask a dermatologist, attaining that level should not involve UV exposure. Prevention starts at home with a good skin-care routine consisting of a daily UVA/UVB SPF 15 or higher for the face, ears, nose, neck, chest and any other areas of skin not covered by sun protective fabrics. Look for make-up and foundation that has an SPF built-in. Regular application of SPF 15 or greater sunscreens with UVA/UVB coverage has been shown to decrease risk of squamous cell skin cancer by 40% and melanoma by 50%. In addition to decreasing an individual’s skin cancer risk, studies have shown 24% less aging in patients who apply sunscreens daily. What’s the best sunscreen you might ask? Quite simply, it is the one you will remember to use every day, insuring that it is SPF 15 or greater and has UVA/UVB coverage. After all, as Benjamin Franklin wisely said “an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.” Reference(s): www.skincancer.org - full list of references for facts from this article are available on this website. 60

march 2014 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

woman ::leading

Empowering Women to Be Their

Best By Nadia Pierre-Louis Photo by Brandon Vick

growing family as well as ensuring that her children have the resources to make a living in the future has always been her main goal.

This April, Patricia Blair will be traveling to the Marriot Marquis in New York City not only to hear guest speaker Star Jones but to appear Along with empowering women to be successful, taking care of her as a veritable nominee for “Woman of the Year” by the National family and gardening, Blair is also an avid volunteer in the Rochester community. After a bout with breast cancer in 2007, Blair underwent Association of Professional Women. a mastectomy and reconstruction. She’s been volunteering at the As a successful business woman and mother, Blair has a lot to say to Breast Cancer Coalition and has met some true leaders such as Holly young women, especially those on their own and in the work field. Anderson, who runs the coalition and Sylvia Cappelino, who Blair “My focus is empowering women to go out and be the best they can describes as her inspiration and also the first person to come to her be and not be afraid or intimidated,” said Blair. “And I think I’ve aid when she was diagnosed. exemplified that since I was 25.” Blair is also seeking to better serve the local Jewish community; this At a young age, Blair found herself a single mother in need of a break is a population that will always remain close to her heart. During in order to support herself and her daughter. In 1975, she moved World War II, Blair’s father, Dr. Naim N. Khuri, stayed in Germany to New Orleans to live with her aunt and uncle and found a job for three years as a chief physician at the Dachau concentration working as one of the very few female Cadillac representatives in camp. He never spoke about the war with Blair due to the horrific the United States. After 13 years, she was promoted to new car sales nature of his experience, but one day at her mother’s house in her manager and was doing quite well for herself. She put her daughter hometown of Binghamton, Blair saw a book that was written about through private school, purchased a home and lived a cozy life there her father. She took the book home and decided to donate it to the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum in Washington, DC. until her mother was taken ill in 1989. Blair really looked up to him for giving her such a good work ethic. After helping to nurse her back to health, Blair made the move to “He never gave in to me. He always told me I had enough… and Rochester in September of 1991 to work at a dealership on West he was right,” said Blair. Ridge Road. Two years later, Blair became ill with Hodgkin’s disease. Unfortunately, the illness prevented her from returning to work as Having a strong and supportive family is truly the groundwork for she bravely battled her way through chemotherapy and radiation an overall successful life. Blair is an example for single mothers to treatments. Luckily, she had a supportive mother who helped her see realize that although things may not sometimes go in one’s favor, through a trying time. By 1995, Blair had wed her former husband, one must form his or her own path to survive. Not being afraid to Joel Chiarenza, gained custody of his four children and was introduced get out into “an arena of men” is also an assertion that Blair wants women to keep in mind throughout their careers. to commercial real estate.

Today, Blair is thriving in her role at the local management consulting Throughout her busy life as a working mother, Blair didn’t have many business known as “Frontier Communities” which located on Scottsville opportunities to sit back and relax. Today, she takes advantage of that time by volunteering, spending time with her beautiful family, cooking, Road and operated by ex-husband Joel and their four children. entertaining and spending as much time as possible outdoors. She Blair was taught to stand on her own two feet and be able to take continues to stay true to her life’s motto: “to thy own self be true”. care of herself from her parents. “The hardest job is being a parent, the easy job is working outside the home,” said Blair. Managing the march 2014 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

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