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ICU presents.,

u cnts presents ery Wednesday

9-12

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WINE50

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OR A CRATE OF

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Every Thursday from 5pm In Da Vinci's Bar nnted by The iJ^m^iurt* X 4 9 5

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4

Not too Late for the Ball

w a n t m e d i c s t o b e fully integrated into ¹ÄÍί ¯Íίͧ¹Ï ¼ t h e i r u n i o n (less , then I s u g g e s t t h a t t h i s o u t d a t e d a t t i t u d e is rel-

It m a y n o t b e t o o late t o g o t o t h e Ball

egated

W e h a v e , after m a n y p h o n e calls, p e r -

b e l o n g s in t i m e for next years freshers!

s u a d e d A l e x a n d r a ¡ ¢ £¢ ¤ e t o a l l o w us t o try a n d m e e t d e m a n d b y r e l e a s i n g m o r e tickets f o r t h e ICU S u m m e r Ball, w h i c h § w ill b e h e l d o n f r i d a y t h e ¥ ¦ h ¨ © ª« . T o

t o the scrap

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A

M r Dear

heap

where

it

t Year M e d i c

Áа°

y

Á°Ä¯ÍÎ

f e e s , r e m i n d i n g u s that A U T h a s l o b b i e d

t i n e s t i c k s d r o p t h e i r butt's o n t h e grass.

parliament against t h e m . ®µ¯Ã±¯ , please, stop trying t o turn

This m a k e s t h e l a w n a m e s s y a n d u g l y

the issue into 'Lecturers v Students' a n d ÁÃÄ ÁÃÄ let's s t a n d t o g e t h e r â r ¬êy f o r Staff, r °Ãͧ s for Students, as t h e placard dis´

p l a c e t o sit. T h e r e s h o u l d b e a f i n e , p r e f e r a b l y £5 p e r b u t t p e r s m o k e r o n litt e r i n g . T h e m o n e y c o u l d g o t o w a r d s f re e beverage for t h e next exhilarating M a n

p l a y e d o n t h e f r o n t p a g e o f last w e e k ' s

Utd g a m e , w h e n they g o o n to dominate

f e l i x s t a t e d clearly.

another season o f football.

,

¯²°¶ ´ e Constantinides ® ´ S t u d e n t a n d IC A U T m e m b e r

b e a s fair a s p o s s i b l e , t h i s l i m i t e d n u m -

B e f o r e t h e s m o k e r s say, w h a t a b o u t the p e o p l e w i t h their crisp packets a n d

ber o f tickets will b e i s s u ed over t h e

W h y d i d y o u d e v o t e half a p a g e in t h e

U n i o n f r o n t d e s k t o t h e first p e o p l e that

last Issue t o s o m e o n e w h o b y h i s o w n

f i n n e d , b u t a s y e t t h e f a g butt's o u t n u m -

come through the door.

admission, knows nothing about nothÑ i n g I'm n o t t a k i n g i s s u e w i t h h i s v i e w s

b e r a n y o t h e r r u b b i s h ïÀ t o ï.

Congratulations g o out to Shermina B h a t t a c h a r y y a ( M e d i c i n e I) w h o h a s w o n

a b o u t t h e a c a d e m i c abilit y r e q u i r e d t o

a M e a l for T w o at Luigi M a l o n e ' s , A l e x a n -

pas s t h e first year m e d i c a l statistics e x a m ;

der Yip ( D o c ¬ ­ D I) w h o h a s w o n a T w o ®¯°±² ¯²µ²¶ n Tent a n d A m y Davis ³ ´ y III) ¸¹ w h o h a s w o n a · C o l o u r T e l e v i s i o n . It's

I t o o , c o n s i d e r It s o m e w h a t f a r c i c a l . Ò e

chewing

g u m , they

also s h o u l d

be

I h o p e t o s e e a cleaner Q u e e n s lawn

Rythmes all Wrong ëìííî

for us all t o enjoy, f o r t h e f e w days o f s u n shine w e will get.

,

might have looked for a m o r e original

Karan Kapoor. ÿ d yr. M e d i c

p e r s p e c t i v e o n it t h o u g h , d o n ' t y o u think,

Sorry t o b e s a d a n d p e d a n t i c (typical IC

still not t o o late f o r y o u t o w i n , a s t h e next

rather t h a n implicity putting t h e w h o l e

p o s t g r a d t h e n ;-)), b u t I c o u l d n ' t h e l p

p r i z e d r a w w i l l h a p p e n t o d a y at ¦º » » ¼ ½ ,

t h i n g d o w n t o s o m e sort o f i n i q u i t o u s

noticing the minor clanger your music

where y o u could w i n o n e o f three free

t r e a t m e n t f o r t h o s e o f u s in t h e B M S . N o t

reviewer

d i n n e r suit h i r e s o r a h a i r c u t - w o r t h ¾¿À.

totally u n r e l a t e d is t h e slight in t h e s a m e

All y o u h a v e t o d o t o e n t e r is o w n a ticket

article o n t h e m e d i c a l lecturer w h o w a s

R y t h m e s D i g i t a l e s ñ a r e (I t h o u g h t ) w e l l ó ôõ ö÷ k n o w n not to be french. ò s Lu C o n t '

by t h e t i m e o f t h e d r a w . Á² r the record, the S u m m e r

b r o a d c a s t t o t h e b i o l o g i s t s in t h e n e i g h ðε b o u r i n g lecture theatre. Ó y h i s fault,

( w o r k o u t w h a t that t r a n s l a t e s a s y o u r -

I t h i n k y o u m a y f i n d it i n t e r e s t i n g w h a t

selves....) a c t u a l l y c o m e s f r o m that w e l l

the staff/student c o m m i t t e e have to say

k n o w n gallic m e t r o p o l i s o f R e a d i n g . I

o n t h e matter. T h e m i n u t e s f r o m their last

åå å ) are attached, I m e e t i n g ÞÞ M a r c h ·

Ball

d r o p p e d in i s s u e ï ï ¿ ð . ' L e s

T e a m don't get free tickets, w e pay as  y o u d o , s o w h y d o w e d o it (a) T h e C h a l -

g a m e . . . or w a s he

but o f c o u r s e , h e w a s a d o c t o r a n d s o fair  Well, never m i n d ,

take

l e n g e a n d (b) w h e n y o u g e t t h e r e y o u

that's just f a c t u a l a c c u r a c y a n d N O B O D Y

homework.

realise it's d e f i n i t e l y a n e v e n t w o r t h fight-

c a r e s a b o u t that...

i n g for.

'The

®Ã°§

doing

their

k n o w t h e y a r e o l d m i n u t e s b u t it d o e s

p o i n t ( c r i b b e d f r o m last y e a r ' s m u d µÃ±§²Íøа e n c r u s t e d official ´ y g u i d e ) , if Á°¯Íù they were h they w o u l d b e called

IC s t u d e n t s , staff a n d a n y o f t h e i r f r i e n d s , Idris Ó

s o w h y n ot invite s o m e f r i e n d s f r o m

wasn't

O n an entirely sad a n d pedantic

Yours,

y o f t h e Year' is o p e n t o all

it s o m e o n e

ðÎÄÍ

ICSM's Cameras

clarify t h e s i t u a t i o n o n t h e c a m e r a s ! !

S e e p a g e 5, p a r a g r a p h c f o r t h e relevant section.

'Les R y t h m e s D i g i t a u x ' i n s t e a d .

g

Cheers!

other universities, t h e n t h e y c a n s e e for t h e m s e l v e s that IC s t u d e n t s d o k n o w

r

h o w to have a g o o d time!

t

Yours anorakly,

e Kind Regards,

Rob Leah Ðŵ¯

³é º Ó . Ó

s

Matt

d y S c h o o l ¬ ­ ú)

c) Behaviour

n S u m m e r Ball T e a m

h t

Mish-Mash M e s s Dear

Á¯µÄÅ

,

I r e a d M r M i s h - M a s h ' s c o l u m n w i t h interest a n d n o t a little i n c r e d u l i t y last w e e k ¸Ê Ë ÆÇÈÈÉe ·· . I w i s h I w a s t a k i n g t h e stats

r

Dear

y and

×Ø

Á¯µÄÅ

ÕÖ Ô

c h a p b e h i n d Les R h y t h m e s D i g i t a l e s is Á°¯ÍùÌÑ English not Òe c o m e s from

It w a s r e p o r t e d t h a t c o m p l a i n t s h a v e

Reading, alledgedly.

t h e b e h a v i o u r o f s t u d e n t s d u r i n g lec-

r

®µ¯Ã±¯ ÙÚ

ÕÛÜ

m a d e it d i f f i c u l t t o b o t h t e a c h a n d c o n -

Danny

c e n t r a t e . It w a s g e n e r a l l y a g r e e d

I w o n d e r w h e t h e r Ý Þ ß d yr b i o u n d e r Á¯µÄ ¸Ê x · · ) h a s t a k e n part in a n y

in t h e e x a m , b u t I a s s u r e o u r d e a r K e v

o p p o s e t h e i n t r o d u c t i o n o f f e e s . If s/he

that if h e o n l y h a d h a l f a n h o u r t o c o m -

h a d , t h e y w o u l d s u r e l y k n o w that l e c t u r -

p l e t e t h e f o u r stats t e s t s r e q u i r e d , h e

e r s h a v e s h o w n g r e a t i n t e r e s t in t h e

m i g h t f e e l j u s t a little bit p r e s s e d f o r ®¯°Ìà ¼ s t h e r e a s o n 'so m a n y time. w a n n a b e d o c t o r s f a i l e d ' Is t h e fact that

f u n d i n g debate and have indeed ¹±Ì²á¯ d solidarity to students over t h e ¹ tuition fees issue.

they are selected t o deal with p e o p l e ,

W h e n t u i t i o n f e e s w e r e first f l o a t e d

that

t h i s sort o f b e h a v i o u r w o u l d n o t b e t o l -

y

activity t o d e f e n d t h e s t u d e n t g r a n t a n d

e r a t e d p a r t i c u l a r l y in t h e p r e s e n c e o f

s

patients...

d .

Action

No Butts, Dear

Á¯µÄÅ

û üý

Õþ

At t h e b e g i n n i n g o f s u m m e r t e r m T will

e

r e m i n d t h e year o f t h e appropriate stand a r d s o f b e h a v i o u r . T e c h n i c i a n s will b e ¹±Ì²á Ð ¹ ¼ o n the allowed to record a n d

,

screens any unacceptable behaviour.

rather t h a n w i t h m a c h i n e s like t h e m a j o r -

as a p o s s i b i l i t y b y LSE, IC A U T s e n t a let-

N o w that's s u m m e r is h e r e I d o n ' t f e e l

ity o f IC.

ter o f s u p p o r t t o a s t u d e n t c o n f e r e n c e

like s i t t i n g in a n ashtray.

M o s t o f t h e first y e a r m e d i c s I k n o w

h e l d t o o p p o s e their i n t r o d u c t i o n . N a t i o n -

l a w n is r a p i d l y b e c o m i n g o n e t h o u g h .

h a r b o u r n o ill t h o u g h t s o r p r e j u d i c e s

ally, A U T s u b m i t t e d a w e l l t h o u g h t o u t

N o l o n g e r a p l e a s a n t p l a c e t o c o m e sit

t o w a r d s o t h e r IC s t u d e n t s . I f i n d K e v i n ' s

a l t e r n a t i v e t o t h e c u r r e n t f u n d i n g sys-

a n d c h a t , o r t o e n j o y a b o t t l e o f Evian,

c o l u m n deeply upsetting a n d very n e g -

t e m w h i c h c a n b e r e a d o n - l i n e at ̧§ ááá ÃЧ ²°¶ Ðä ¼âãã º º º . I have been o n

because of smokers. Before they take u p

stick t o m e d i c t r a d i t i o n , a n d o n t h e o t h e r

a n d the interruptions o f people

w a l k i n g in a n d o u t o f t h e l e c t u r e t h e a t r e

,

k n o w that t h e r e is a h e l p s y s t e m a v a i l a b l e

h a n d w e h a v e o l d e r m e d i c s t e l l i n g us t o

b e e n received f r o m lecturers regarding

levels

, such language...

s

gradà ³

a very a w k w a r d p o s i t i o n . O n t h e o n e

lectures

tures... It w a s r e p o r t e d that t h e n o i s e ÕÖ Ô

e x a m that h e d e s c r i b e d . It's r e a s s u r i n g t o

ative. W e (as first y e a r s ) f i n d o u r s e l v e s in

during

C a n I b e really a n a l a n d p o i n t o u t that t h e

e

The Queen's

Deadline for letters for is

n Wednesday.

t h e r e p o s i t i o n o n t h e c r u c i f i x as martyrs

every national student demonstration ååæ since · a n d t h e r e a r e always local A U T Á a n d çèé ÓE banners flying. W h e n i C U

t o liberty o f t h e i n d i v i d u a l I'm n o t w a n t -

Letters m a y b e e d i t e d f o r l e n g t h , b u t

ing a ban o n smoking o n the lawn,

w ill n o t b e a l t e r e d in a n y o t h e r w a y .

Labour

enjoyable.

Club organised a debate

on

a l t h o u g h it w o u l d m a k e it e v e n

more

w h e n w e try t o i n t e g r a t e w i t h IC w e a r e ¹Ã°°²¶Ãͧ¹ accused of being by snide

t u i t i o n f e e s last year, IC A U T m e m b e r s

I h a t e t h e fact that t h i s p a c k o f puff-

d i c k h e a d s s u c h a s o u r f r i e n d K ev in. If ICU

a t t e n d e d a n d v o i c e d their o p p o s i t i o n t o

i n g p i l l o c k s after d r a g g i n g o n t h e i r n i c o -

Letters n e e d n o t b e s i g n e d , b u t a swipe card must b e s h o w n w h e n subm i t t i n g a n o n y m o u s letters.

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Editorial Assistant Required

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Alexandra Palace releases more tickets.

First come first served, Prize Draw today at 5.00pm for Free Dinner Suit Hire and Ladies Haircut (Worth ÂŁ40)

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f you've got a minute m a yb e y o u ' d

p r o l o n g e d raising of the

help me out with a little survey that

eyebrows

a

I'm con du ctin g .

M o o r e in

u

Which of the fol-

lowing would you say, preys most heav-

,

la

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t

Roger

Only Live

m

but worse (in the sense of really

ily on your mind at this m o m e n t in time

bizarre) was still to c o m e .

a) The p r o b l e m of b u r g e o n i n g Third

through the channels I c h a n c e d u p o n ,

World debt with all the implications that

in turn,- a Chinese cookery p r o g r a m m e

g

it carries for peace and stability in sub-

which was making use of scanning elec-

Saharan Africa b) Th e e m e r g e n c e of

tron micrographs to explain the best

terrorist states with nucleat capabilities

way to fry beansprouts; a p r o g r a m m e

in the new world order resulting from

enticingly advertised in the Japan Times

the end of the Cold War a n d the col-

as

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s h o w with

% &

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terial strains that are resistant to all but

had sex with his Japan es e girlfriend (who

t n 1

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consisted of a Swiss bloke telling the watching public about the first time he

as

l n

c o m m u n i s m c) T h e

" 't line of d e f e n c e antibiotics such (" )*

n d) The way C o k e g o e s

g

which

alarming increase in the number of bac-

lapse of Soviet

e

r ,

was sitting giggling at his side

t

all

gripping his hand like s o m e o n e drown-

fizzy and froths over the side of the

ing) whilst her parents slept in the room

t

glass w h e n y o u pour it onto ice cubes,

above; and a music show, the grand

g

Bit of a tricky o n e isn't it?

finale of which was a half-hearted ren-

If, like m e , your nocturnal hours

dition of

+e

Sunshine p e r f o r m e d by a five-piece

beques and cocktail parties laid waste

ukulele orchestra complet e with A l o h a

by uncontrollable outbreaks of carbon-

shirts and ties,

ated

beverage

supereffervescence.

At this point I could stand no more and was forced to pull the plug on the

Because Incredible though it may s e e m ,

magic eye and gulp d o w n a handful of

it was this very topic which was the

Ibuprofen to ease what had now turned

subject of a /

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e special report o n

O s a k a just the other day.

the ba t h r o o m to try and drag my poor

parade o f experts, f r o m a g r o u p of

eyebrows, which by this time were o n

female office workers - w h o s e profeslives

by

this

a Chinese cookery programme

a

professor

d

of

n g e g g e n

pearing into my hair-

-

W h i c h

original position,

e n e

By now s o m e of

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superiors'elevensesto

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problem

when preparing their

g

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are

apparently m a d e hell

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into a migraine, before hurrying off to

A whole

sional

d

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T

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World is Waiting fot the

are assailed by terrifying visions of bar-

worry

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