THE MEDIUM ANNOUNCES BID TO ACQUIRE FOX NEWS

BY JAMES TERI NUWUS :3

In the wake of Fox News’ reported 800 million dollar settlement payout to Dominion Voting Systems for a defamation suit related to a long-running smear campaign regarding its supposed role in an alleged conspiracy to rig the 2020 U.S. presidential election in favor of Joe Biden, esteemed Rutgers University publication The Medium has announced its plans to purchase the popular right-wing news outlet for an undisclosed amount of money.

The Medium is excited to welcome such a well-known news comedy brand to our family.”

According to Haas, the acquisition was done out of a desire to not only boost The Medium’s online presence, but also in an attempt to break into the world of broadcast network television, as the burgeoning media mogul has already announced his intentions to replace Fox’s Tucker Carlson with himself.

Rupert Murdoch, founder and executive chairman of Fox’s parent company News Corp, seemed equally smitten with the development, saying “I’m not sure that kid really knows what Fox is, or what its audience expects of it, but at this point? Fuck it.” He elaborated further by adding, “Although we’ve used the ‘entertainment’ excuse any number of times in the past for legal purposes, I don’t know that the viewer base’s necessarily gonna be stoked now that it’s operated by a literal college satire paper, but I guess as long as it

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