Parenting with Purpose
Jody Lee Cates
Parents know from instinct and experience that love gives kids confidence and security and creates unbreakable bonds. It’s love that gets parents through sleepless nights with a newborn, exhausting days with a toddler and frustrating moments with a teenager. But unconditional love is much more than the fuel parents need to make it through the tough parts of raising kids. Unconditional Love What it’s not: Unconditional love is not about permissiveness or catering to a child’s every whim. It is not about how parents feel toward a child at any given moment. Unconditional love is about how children feel loved by parents, completely and without reservation. It comes without requirements to behave or perform a certain way, and it comes with a boatload of benefits that go well beyond positive feelings.
Benefits Backed by Science
Your Child’s Brain on Hugs The power of unconditional love
22 • SanDiegofamily.com • February 2020
Oxytocin is a brain chemical released when a person feels love and connection. When oxytocin increases, growth hormones that support the development of the brain, body and immune system increase as well. That means unconditional love not only makes us feel good, but it’s also good for us. It supports cognitive development and the ability to form positive relationships, reduces stress and anxiety, raises confidence and selfesteem, and strengthens the immune system. Here are three ways to demonstrate unconditional love children need to thrive, along with compelling benefits.
1. Hugs
Studies show that hugs and nurturing touch provide positive stimulation young brains and bodies need to grow. Decades of research indicates that a lack of physical contact is detrimental to children, and those who receive adequate amounts of gentle physical touch score higher on developmental assessments. They also experience fewer emotional and behavioral problems.
