Parenting with Purpose
How to Stay Connected in
Jody Lee Cates
Disconnected Times
Staying connected to friends, family and a supportive community is vital for parents juggling the responsibilities of raising kids during a pandemic. Connection to the outside world reduces stress and anxiety while providing the help and encouragement parents need to manage feelings of overwhelm and frustration. Without those connections, it doesn’t take long before it feels like the wheels are coming off for families in quarantine. “Even without the pandemic, parenting young children can make you feel isolated,” says Marriage & Family Therapist Devin Price of San Diego. “And if you’re a parent who’s not having regular adult contact, that can take a toll on you.” Making and keeping healthy social connections happened organically pre-COVID. We talked to other adults at the office or gym. Parents spent time together at playdates for kids, cheering from the sidelines at sporting events, and dozens of other ways. Without these naturally occurring 14 • SanDiegofamily.com • October 2020
opportunities, staying connected while social distancing takes intention, creativity and planning. So how do we stay socially connected in disconnected times?
health needs of your family members. Stay informed about local regulations and outbreaks and adjust plans accordingly.
Be intentional.
Connecting safely means getting creative and thinking differently about what it means to be part of a community. A simple Google search yields a variety of ideas for ways to stay connected online. Use technology to host a virtual dinner party, create a remote book group or workout with friends via livestream exercise classes. Be sure to balance connecting online with personal interaction. “It’s so easy with social media to feel like we’re connected,” Barrett says. “But I have to take a break to invest in real relationships. My girls and I like to bake cookies and drop them off for friends. We’ll call and say, ‘Hey! We’re out front’ and have a socially distanced in-person visit.” Sandy Seaman has a group of girlfriends that got together every
Decide what’s important to you, what you’re missing most, and how much risk you’re willing to take to make it happen. Being strategic and deciding what works best for your family is a more realistic and sustainable way to live. That’s what Cardiff mom Carrie Barrett is doing with her family. “We don’t want to be careless, but we also can’t live in fear,” she says. “We’re choosing to spend time with our core people. Family and close friends who will have our backs (and we’ll have theirs) if any of us get sick.” There’s no rulebook for living in quarantine. We’re all experimenting, and what works for one parent won’t work for another. Don’t feel pressured to do what someone else is doing and always take into consideration the
Get creative.
