The Taste Issue

Free Volume 9 Issue 160 April 23 2009

The

Taste Issue

Serving La Crosse, Onalska, Holmen, Barre Mills, Stoddard WI La Crescent, Hokah, Winona MN

Second Supper Newspaper, LLC 614 Main St. La Crosse, WI 54601 Phone: 608.782.7001 Email: editor@secondsupper.com Advertising: advertising@secondsupper.com Online: www.secondsupper.com Publisher Mike Keith mike.keith@secondsupper.com

Editorial Editor: Adam Bissen adam.bissen@secondsupper.com Student Editor: Ben Clark benjamin.clark@secondsupper.com Music Editor: Jason LaCourse music@secondsupper.com Graphic Design: Matt Schmidt matt.schmidt@secondsupper.com Columnists: Amber Miller amber.miller@secondsupper.com Brett Emerson brett.emerson@secondsupper.com Shuggypop shuggypop.jackson@secondsupper.com Contributors: Jacob Bielanski, Erich Boldt, Nicholas Cabreza, Andrew Colston, Ashly Conrad, Emily Faeth, Brandon Fahey, El Jefe, Emma Mayview, Briana Rupel, Noah Singer, Bob Treu, Nate Willer

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Second Supper vol. 9, issue 160

Letter from the Editor Welcome to the fourth installment of Second Supper’s series on the senses: Taste. In a way, this is the most conventional topic for a weekly newspaper to cover, as restaurant reviews are a staple of the genre and — just puttin’ it out there — most of our advertisers sell food. We’ve got “supper” right up there in our name, so I don’t think we’ve been slighting the sense of taste in the past. I know I choose my words carefully when I write about beer every week. Amber Miller does the same with her coffee column, and I love Jacob Bielanski’s travelogues specifically for the little places he stops to eat at along the way.

Perhaps we could have coasted for this issue, but the sense of taste just demands we push it farther. For one reason, I think taste already receives the most honest dialogue of all the senses. Sight might produce the most conversations, but there’s so many times when we don’t take in the whole picture and we just babble out of ignorance. Touch conversations are reactionary — “ooh,” “ouch!” — sound conversation are relative — “I like this song” — and smell only gets mentioned on the rare occasion there’s something worth noting. But taste, people are always talking about what they’re eating, and for the most part they’re pretty right on.

When you taste something, it’s pretty easy to determine why you like it. I’m not sure why I enjoy the music I do, and — even though I read Ben Clark’s Smock Talk in every issue — I’m really not sure how the senses of smell or sight actually work. But ask me what I love about Mexican food, and I can tell you: cilantro. I know about hops in beer, chiles in spicy food, and that things with more fat in it generally taste better than things with less. And I’m nowhere near a gourmet!

Sp you won’t find any reviews in here of Wisconsin’s baked potato and fish fry cuisine; we’ll do that in an average week. Instead you’ll get reviews from Nate Willer, who’s been hanging around East Asia for two years, slurping up raw fish and rice liquor.We won’t have any sentimental odes to bratwurst or grandma’s cookies either, not when we’ve got Brett Emerson licking bike tires and bars of soap for the rest of us. My feature story has the most coverage of local restaurants, but it all comes from the vegetarian menu, a wide swath of dining that I had previously foresworn. But once again, I think the most interesting sensory fact comes from Smock Talk: Did you know that scientists proved human beings don’t have any taste buds? Me neither!

That should get you talking.

— Adam Bissen

Letter to the Editor I found the April 9 cover story “Is This Art?” close to my heart. I am not a graffiti artist, but my own work has frequently been questioned as to its correctness as art. My response has often been, who cares, why bother and what's the point? I am confident enough in what I do not to care how it's classified. I am an artist, so I produce art.

In 1917, Marcel Duchamp championed the idea of intent with the infamous ready-made urinal transformed to “Fountain” and signed R. Mutt for the Armory Show in New York. As for graffiti art, I believe it could be also classified according to intent. If the intent is to be art — it simply is. If the intent is to be vandalism — it is.

The question, “Is it art?” may imply a sacredness that allows an art designation to trump other concerns. I have personally enjoyed viewing some well-placed and executed graffiti art, so I won’t condemn or condone. I think the questions should be more about quality and placement than classification.

Does a self-anointed artist (or vandal) have the right to enhance or degrade a community’s environment without any over or undersight? The question of property rights was addressed, but what about disrespecting another artist's work? If architecture is an art form, maybe the building's architect should be consulted.

As stated in the article, spray paint on paper may be pretty tough, but who said art was easy? Artists have always confronted challenges and the best overcome them.

All the best, Billy X. Curmano http://www.billyx.net

April 23, 2009

TABLE OF CONTENTS THIS PAGE ..................................... 3 CORRIE BREKKE ........................... 4 DO THIS ......................................... 5 SAVE DA EARTH ............................ 6 HOW TO TASTE .............................. 7 FICTION .......................................... 8 VEG PLEDGE ..................................9 ADVERTISEMENT .........................10 EATING/LICKING ..........................11 THINK PINK ..................................12 CLASSIC AMBER ......................... 13 FILM REVIEWS ............................. 14 SAGITTARIUS ...............................15 COMMUNITY SERVICE ...........16-17 ROCK OUT! .................................. 18

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Second Supper’s finally on the social networking bandwagon, with a whole chain of townies to answer our deliciously revealing questions.

Each week, the interviewee will name someone they're connected to, who will become the next person interviewed, and so it shall continue. You see? We really are all connected.

NAME AND AGE: Corrie Lynne Brekke

TELL US A JOKE What's brown and sticky? A stick.

BIRTHPLACE: Rochester, Minn.

TELL US YOUR GUILTIEST PLEASURE: Reading the Second Supper aloud with the lights turned down low, trying to emulate Shuggypop's voice

CURRENT JOB: Co-owner of the Root Note DREAM JOB: A potter

WHAT BOOK ARE YOU CURRENTLY READING? Catcher in the Rye & To the Light House

COVETED SUPERPOWER: I couldn't trust myself with a superpower.

FIRST CONCERT YOU WENT TO: Amy Grant (I can't believe I'm admitting that — AHH!!)

IF YOU COULD LIVE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD, WHERE WOULD IT BE? Once when I was in an aeroplane flying over the Alps, I saw a little village. I think that might be a nice place to live.

WHAT'S THE LAST THING YOU BOUGHT? A bag of seaweed rice chips. They sound terrible but they taste delicious!

FAVORITE LOCAL RESTAURANT: Kate's on State FAVORITE BAR IN TOWN: Bodega CELEBRITY CRUSH: Beck

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HOW DO YOU KNOW BILL? My old neighbor and friend

Second Supper vol. 9, issue 160

Do This

Bring your Earth Week celebration to a fantastic finale this Saturday at the Earth Day Fair. The place will be packed with goodies of all varieties. A local foods fair will top off your tummy with local and/or organic deliciousness, educational presentations will bring you up to speed on all things green, and you can nurture your inner Van Gogh in a recyclable art class. Take in several environmental films and enjoy the rocking sounds of a few local bands (more on that later). Bring the kiddies (or at least, the part of your own personality that is eternally childlike) and put those craft-making skills to the test. You’ll have the chance to go online and make your “GreenLaCrosse.com Promise.” Green vendors will be displaying the latest in solar panels and sustainable vehicles. And aside from making you a more well-rounded, well-informed environmental hipster, the fair may just send you home with a prize or two on top of that. Nifty door prizes will be distributed every half hour (wow!) and if you’re one of the first 25 people through the doors, you’ll automatically be awarded for your stellar punctuality skills. FYI, the grand prize is a month’s free use of some seriously sweet rides — a Civic Hybrid or a CNG Civic.

I’m sure all of the bands providing live music will be lovely, but I know for a real, live fact that one of them is out of this world. A quartet of four of the most far-out fellas you’re apt to meet, The Levitating Train Committee is going to steam on in to give your auditory senses the time of their lives! While you may hear a well-performed cover of Bob Dylan or Phish (a little Axilla, anyone?) in your time with the LTC, you will also be transported far into the outer space of funky long jams written by theirs, truly.They’re definitely the freshest, zestiest jam band on the music market. They love nothing more than droves of bodies groovin’ away and getting down, so they’ll be the perfect icing on the Earth Week cake. (Speaking of which, there was free Co-op carrot cake last year, and one can only hope for a recurrence of that event this time around…)

Check out greenlacrosse.com to find out more.

— Amber Miller

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By Amber Miller

amber.miller@secondsupper.com

Congratulations folks, we made it to another Earth Day. What I mean is, the earth isn’t a smoldering pile of nuclear waste surrounded by a foggy haze of methane and carbon dioxide, not yet anyway. While I realize the whole point of Earth Day is to get excited about being respectful to the environment, it really does make me pretty depressed (just like New Year’s Eve). The situation that we’ve placed ourselves squarely in the middle of is moderately to seriously dire, and I’ve always thought that having children in the midst of such environmental insanity is just plain unethical. But now I have a sweet little darling to tend to, and the terrible nightmare of what could await him (heck, what could await me, even) haunts me daily, but even more so on Earth Day.

So here I go, firmly establishing myself as the take-no-prisoners style of environmentalist: I’m pretty sure we’ve done it. I’m pretty sure that there is no going back at this point, that even if life doesn’t completely cease to exist, it will drastically and dramatically change in the near future (and I know, it’s easy to think that life will change elsewhere, but not here…but it will change everywhere). Aw shucks, no more Hummers and steaks for everyone…

This whole doom and gloom outlook is no good, though. In fact, it’s this very attitude that inspires some misguided individuals to completely stop trying altogether and resign themselves to lives filled with overconsumption, leaving lights on left and right, letting that water — hot water, no less — run down the drain while teeth-brushing ensues, littering just for the pure joy of creating more garbage.

While I do think it’s probably too late to totally avoid disaster, I don’t want to take any chances here. I mean, this is the planet we’re gambling on, and it’s the only one my son has to, you know, live on. So even if we are totally screwed, I don’t want to give up, I certainly don’t want to make it any worse that it already is, and I really don’t want him to even have the slightest inkling that environmentalism is pointless. Even if it is at this point, it’s just not right to give up and throw more fuel on the flames.

Being an environmentalist is a bit of a curiosity — it seems that it would be the most natural thing in the world for children. It doesn’t seem like something that one has to teach to their children, but in American culture today, it’s actually an uphill battle. When a huge percentage of the toys in this country are imported from China, full of lead paint and what have you, God knows what’s gone in to the manufacturing of them, we have a problem.

When they all require fourteen C batteries (I didn’t even know they made C batteries) and an engineering degree just to get the dang thing out of the 9,000 layers of packaging, we have a problem. And when children don’t even know

how to just play outside anymore because their poor little brains are so addicted to television and computer screens and whatnot, we have a problem!

If we do things right, however, the new generations could grow up to be real problem-solvers, and if we do things really really right, we’ll start changing our own lifestyles so they don’t expect to live up to these ridiculously high standards. Kids are adaptable and passionate; teaching them to not kill the planet shouldn’t be too difficult.

My son has a book called The Great Kapok Tree that’s pretty rad. For one, it has some wild illustrations. It’s basically about one particular tree in the rain forest that a man is trying to cut down and the entire community of animals and people that depend on it presenting different reasons why it’s a pretty bad idea. In the front of the book, there is a world map that shows the total area that used to be covered in rainforest and all that is left now. It’s quite sad, but there’s an upbeat ending and it’s great fun to read while practicing a South American accent of some kind. Anyway, it’s a fantastic book that looks cool and that kids apparently like, so the point is that there are lots of easy ways to teach children about the horrors of modern society and its evil, tree-choppin’ ways.

I don’t want to get too into writing advice — I’m certainly no expert — but it is Earth Day, so here are some of my very own ideas for raising children who love their mama (the big one, not you): * Let your kids get dirty! Everyone is just fear-struck at the idea of dirt these days, but if kids never have a chance to play in it, they’ll never learn to love the earth. * Give them the tools they need to learn science — it’s fascinating to kids and it helps to understand the science behind what’s going on in the environment. Take them to all the neat programs offered by the Hixon Forest Nature Center, too. * Don’t buy them so much stuff. Learning to live simply should start at birth. * Plant an organic garden together. There’s no better way to teach a valuable lesson than

by DIY. Even if you don’t have the space for a full garden, planting a few small pots of herbs can teach the same message. * This one is easy — spend time outside, lots of it. Go hiking, canoeing, and camping. Go on bug safaris. Be quiet in the woods and count birds. Let them live without all the brain-mushing, energy-consuming entertainment devices.

It’s much more peaceful than listening to all the god-awful singing, beeping, blinking toys.

Second Supper vol. 9, issue 160

Do you think this needs more salt?

It’s Friday night and you’re cooking up food for a party (or making up a tasty batch of Wop, whichever.) However, as you come close to finishing up your delicacy, you decide to take a taste to see if there’s anything that you missed.

Do the nachos need more chili sauce? Does the Wop need another fifth of Vodka, or more cantaloupe? It’s up to your sense of taste to figure out.

The sense of taste as we know it is another form of chemoreception, meaning that the end result of a series of chemical reactions occurring in our mouth. We come up with the taste of something that is either sweet, sour, bitter, salty, or savory. The “tastes” that I’ve listed are now the most commonly accepted differential areas of taste that humans are able to accept, even though it is still in debate as to how many variations of taste the human being can differentiate between. Of course, other factors exist into whether or not we decide that something tastes good. The texture, smell and temperature of anything that we shove into our mouths has a huge part in determining how our body reacts to its taste. For example, Philadelphia sushi rolls are delicious to some people, based simply off of the sweetness of the cream cheese in the center of the roll. But to others, the texture of eating the sushi roll overcomes the actual taste that one experiences from it. It’s with these differences that it becomes evident that taste is truly subjective for each individual person.

To begin to understand how we develop our sense of taste, we need to understand how the taste bud works. Long ago, scientists waved “bye-bye” to the model of a tongue containing different regions on it pertaining to different “taste” sites. These models included sweet tastes to the front, sour tastes in the middle, and bitter tastes to the back. All complete rubbish. In reality, each area of the tongue is capable of helping your brain determine which flavor you are currently enjoying (and if you’ve read my previous columns, remember…it’s all chemical reactions, baby!)

Taste buds are responsible for all of the flavors that we encounter in our day to day life, whether it is from enjoying a tasty burrito

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ALL DAY

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to gulping down some fine caviar.

Taste buds are tiny structures that exist on the surface of the tongue and other mouth cavity areas that make it possible for the brain to recognize the chemical reactions that occur.

The way it works is that taste bud is divided into two basic components; the supporting cells and the gustatory (taste) cells.

The supporting cells exist to keep the structure of the taste bud stable, acting like the staves in a wine cellar, keeping everything in place. The gustatory cells act as the major receptors for the nervous system regarding the differentiation between different types of taste.

As I said before, this is completely based off of chemical reactions.

When somebody experiences a flavor that is “sweet” or “sour,” it is a direct result of a ion exchange chemical reaction. To put it bluntly, this means that there is an uneven concentration of ions (whether it be sodium, calcium, potassium, or any other number of ions) that exists between outer cell membrane and the inner membrane of the cell. For the flavors that the body recognizes as “sweet” or “sour,” the cells create a gradient resulting in the rush of one type of ion into the cell as the result of the speedy exit of another. For example, if a sodium ion exits the cell, you can expect a large amount of potassium ions to enter. A number of necessary body functions run on this seem principle (see Metabolism: Steps 1 – 5000+) to keep everything running correctly.

The other method that the body differentiates between flavors (sweet, bitter, and savory) is based of off G protein coupled reactions. These are (believe me) much more complicated than I want to get into detail right now, but I’ll give you the basics, just so you can show off to that hot redhead at the bar next week. G proteins are activated with the presence of an high energy phosphate donating molecule. In layman’s terms, this means that if there’s an ATP or equivalent molecule present when the molecule binds to the taste receptor, it becomes activated and activates a cascade of reactions within the body, which ultimately brings the flavor to the brain. This is why the next time you get dessert, tip your waiter/waitress double, just because of the extra work you’re making your body go through to enjoy that piece of tiramisu.

I hope this answers some questions that you may have had as to why Banana Cream Pie is the most delicious desert on the planet Earth ever. Just kidding, but hopefully, next time somebody asks you about a specific mechanism of taste, you won’t cough and look towards the ground. Instead, you’ll be able to stare them straight in the eye and ask “which part?” Here’s to tasting everything this world has to offer!

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Erika was on the down escalator when she saw Max for the first time in a month. He was on the ascending staircase, and when he saw her he stuck out his tongue at her. Max had a huge tongue, long and vibrant, thick and dark red at its root, a lighter pink at its tapered tip, an instrument with which he could flick a logy fly out of the crisp fall air. His tongue was one of things about Max she truly admired. One Halloween they went to a party as members of KISS, he as Gene Simmons, she as Peter Criss.

She covered her face with cat whiskers, but Max’s tongue was the show.

Today he was wearing his usual Goth get up: black T-shirt with occult logo, black pants, and black tennis shoes. He had a wicked ring in his nose, and his brown hair was washed in pale blue and teased into points.

This is how he went into the world almost every day, but if something important was happening at law school, a visit to a sitting court for example, he would wear a white shirt with frills on the collar and cuffs, and a shiny metal cross dangling across his chest.

Max seemed determinedly unaware that his style choices might hurt his career. Who in this town would seek counsel from a Goth lawyer in an hour of need? Other Goths, perhaps, a largely penurious group who would depend upon public defenders. In the end she approved of his independent spirit and his refusal to let anyone dictate how he lived. She defended him to friends who laughed at his bizarre tastes.

Unfortunately Goth law didn’t prohibit infidelity.

Erika had come to the Mall to buy a blouse she had seen advertised and some socks. She wanted to leave without delay, because she hated the place. Meeting Max was the last thing she wanted to happen. Not even meeting him actually, but just passing him going in the other direction was enough to make her shudder.

Then he was beside her. Apparently sticking out his tongue wasn’t enough. He had reversed direction at the top of the escalator and followed her down, catching her just as she stopped to examine a garlic squeezer. She had always wanted one, though she had no idea what she’d do with it.

“Cooking Italian, are we?” he asked, giving her his lick-smacking grin.

“Possibly. I don’t cook that often.”

“Then how about Mexican instead?”

This was a reference to their life together she did not want to deal with.

“So how’s the cat?” she asked.

“Gone, I fear. He just wandered off. I’m serious about eating Mexican, though. Aren’t you hungry?”

Of course she was hungry. She was suddenly ravenous. Perhaps because she was always hungry around him. Perhaps because the vacation in Mexico was their one success. They had eaten on the beach beneath a full moon, red snapper cooked on a wood fire, so its taste was slightly smoky and acrid before you got to the

luscious white meat. She had sampled mescal in a little shop in Oaxaca that sold an amazing variety of the stuff in small bottles that looked like perfume vials. They purchased a couple of bottles with a taste that was nearly sweet, and it was marvelous with the fish. They had even tried chocolate melted and laced with chile.

But she had read somewhere that taste buds are replaced every week to ten days, so there could be no repeating the sensations exactly.

“Do you know a good place?” she asked, trying hard to sound as if she wasn’t committing herself. He had seriously damaged her and she knew she would never trust him again.

Max reached out and touched her hand.

She had forgotten how cool his skin was, not just on his hands, which might have been poor circulation, but his face and chest as well. All of him. Even inside of her. Which might have made him repulsive, but when he tasted her ear lobes or her shoulder with his cool tongue, she felt delicious. He could do anything with that tongue of his.

“Puerto Penasco,” he said, delicately touching his upper lip with the tip of the organ in question. O taste and see, he seemed to say. She remembered feeling his teeth when he kissed her neck. She wouldn’t have been surprised if they had been filed.

“You’re out of your gourd,” she said, but as she spoke she saw herself flying, or being carried rather, in Max’s arms, tasting the saltless vanilla of his cool chest as they soared above the sandy line between water and jungle that measured the Sea of Cortez. It might be like that. Of course she couldn’t trust him, but what the hell, they were no longer bound by promises. This would be no more than a sumptuous meal with no leftovers.

“We’re going Dutch, right?”

“As always, my dear.”

“Okay then.”

Amos, driving by the mall with a truckload of tasty but unnutritious items, noticed a Gothish character, the purple in his hair brightening slightly in the spring sun as he walked across the parking lot with his arm around Erika.

“Well, well,” he thought. “Life is all a matter of taste isn’t it? And for that there is no accounting.”

Aha! So you too, dear reader, had neglected the possibility of the actual Max appearing in all his subterranean darkness and glory. Also, you had left out of the equation the desire of the writer, in this case one of the region’s most chronically underpaid ones, to try his hand at Romance, especially the cheap sort peopled by characters with extraordinary, even supernatural endowments, and therefore cast his badly loaded dice in the direction of easy popularity and profitability, even though he possesses an inborn self-destructiveness which may not allow him to do so. So hang on, friends, we have nearly taken leave of our senses.

Second Supper vol. 9, issue 160

Cover story Veg pledge In which a carnivore goes a week without meat

By Adam Bissen

adam.bissen@secondsupper.com From the outside, I look like me on any normal night. My laptop is on my lap; my beer is at my side; and my brow is furled because I’m thinking too hard about something dumb. I’m thinking about this past week — or trying to anyway, but right now I can’t get over the nauseating clog that’s churning in my stomach. I’m pretty sure it was something I ate.

One week ago, when I imagined this moment, I thought I would be feeling finer, possibly triumphant or at least grooving on my old mojo. I even gave today a little nickname, Meat Monday, the day I ended my week-long pledge of vegetarianism. That’s right, for seven days and seven nights I followed the same diet that seems to sustain half my friends, all my sisters and most of the Third World — no meat.

I wasn’t expecting it to be either easy or hard, just an illuminating peak before I went back to my charred flesh-loving ways. But why does my stomach feel so heavy?

Oh yeah, it was probably the roast beef sandwich I had for dinner, the tuna sandwich I made for breakfast, and the General Tso’s chicken I took in last night as a midnight snack.

Three meat-accompanied meals in 24 hours hardly seems like a dietary aberration. It’s in

April 23, 2009

line with the typical American way of dining, and with minimal exception (illness, backpacking trips, college poverty, etc.), it’s how I ate for the previous 26 years. When you’re raised in land of the Big Mac and 10 cent Buffalo wings, meat hardly seems like a luxury. It’s just what separates a meal from a snack.

That’s how I had always looked at meat, and prior to last week I figured I always would.

I’m kind of a dude — maybe not a man’s man, but I’ve butchered my share of animals, cooked them over fire, and bonded while picking bloody gristle from my teeth. My favorite authors seem to have a chauvinist streak, and for whatever reason the best protagonists brood over cuts of beef. Meat, then, is at least partially linked to my perception of manhood, which leads me to my first confession about my vegetarian pledge: It was my girlfriend’s idea.

My lady isn’t a true vegetarian. She’ll eat fish and poultry — “no mammals” — but she’s gone long stretches as a Veg-head. Dozens of my friends have, and all of them seem to carve out their own dietary niche. I’ve known vegans in other cities — folks who wouldn’t touch dairy or eggs — but I don’t know any in La Crosse, and I’m not sure how they’d survive

here anyway. I knew a girl in college who called herself a vegetarian, but she’d consume any meat dish if it was about to be thrown away.

One of my sisters can splurge on freerange poultry, but she has no problem with wild game and looks forward to venison harvest. Point is: I used to mock vegetarians for their limiting diets; yet after dabbling for a week, I now realize they are way more creative then the way I used to eat, selecting from a menu whatever animal I was jonesing for at that particular moment.

For deadline reasons — and not symbolic ones — I began my meatless week right after Easter Sunday, a fact that was lost on me until I drove home from my grandmother’s home with a pound of delicious ham (later to be consumed by my roommate and dog). At the stroke of midnight I found myself in a bar, and thankfully the Bodega can appease late-night munchies. On so many occasions I’ve sucked down a greasy panini and a pint, but my first vegetarian snack would be bruschetta with pesto, onions, tomato, rosemary, garlic, parmesan cheese, basil, and olive oil. It was, dare I say, tastier than any sandwich the Bodega staff had ever placed before me.

That was a realization that I had in a number of local joints: Vegetarian fare is more flavorful than most stuff on the menu. John’s Bar, for instance, has the most tasty and bounteously overstuffed vegetarian quesadilla I’ve ever eaten (mostly because I always ordered mine with chicken). The meaty Tequila’s menu was hard to read on an empty stomach, but I felt like a king after taking down a chile relleno, cheese enchilada, bean chalupa, spinach quesadilla, rice, beans, chips, and salsa (for less than the cost of a meat dinner, no less!). Also, I can’t believe it took a stupid vegetarian pledge to reacquaint myself with the ambrosia that is the Belgian waffle.

The eating wasn’t always good, of course.

Finding dinner at Hardee’s was like finding a prostitute in the Vatican City — and I’m not sure my onion rings and chocolate malt was any less sinful. And the selection around this town? Yeesh! One night, a little before nine, my girlfriend called up three Chinese restaurants from the phone book, but none of them would seat us (because of the time, not our dietary restrictions). She asked someone at Buzzard Billy’s if it offered vegetarian fare, and she heard, “Uhh, we’ve got salads” and learned that the beans and rice is actually cooked in ham hocks. Thankfully, Big Al’s offers a veggie pizza and respectable hours, but if it wasn’t for my girl’s cooking, I don’t think I could have survived the week.

Really, I was only tempted to eat meat once during the previous seven days. Most of my meal companions ate vegetarian right alongside me, so they offered the sort of verbal,

visual, and olfactory support I needed to keep from falling off the wagon. But on one Tuesday night, as I attempted to sit alone and pound out some other story on my laptop, I was tempted like Adam in the Garden.

At bar time, my roommate and our friend (nicknamed “The Scrambler” for his breakfast cooking affinity) arrived in the kitchen with two grocery bags full of goodies. They were about to make an egg scrambler, one that would no doubt taste delicious and soak up booze, a favorite of mine at any other time. But on that Tuesday night when I sat sober and solitary and smelled that bacon frying in a pan, I felt as tempted as any recovering cocaine addict in a Miami Beach disco. I wanted it bad, but just settled for scarfing down fatty eggs after my friends picked out all the meat.

Two days later, I committed Original Sin. I made it out to the bars with roomie and The Scrambler, and I thought I had sufficiently articulated my desire to eat a vegetarian egg and potato dish. Fast forward an hour to my kitchen and a forgetful chef. He handed me a steaming bowl and I devoured it — mmm, it was better than any scrambler I had ever tasted — and then I saw the grizzly brown chunk dangling from my fork: the dumbass had thrown in bacon. “What the hell?” I protested, but it was too late. Damage was done, I was drunk, and the food tasted great. I finished the whole bowl.

Then I went back to my computer, felt sick to my stomach, and wondered if I would always be such a glutton. (And since this is a family newspaper, I’ll spare you the sordid details of the following morning’s purging, but rest assured: it wasn’t pretty)

Now here I am, full circle: one week finished as a vegetarian and I still feel ill after eating some meat. These gastrointestinal pangs, I think, are a sign of my body escaping from normalcy — not American normalcy, mind you, but the normal way a Homo sapien would eat: vegetables and legumes. Meat is rather wasteful. My sister knows the exact stats, but a whole lot of human beings could live off the amount of food we pump into a cow over a lifetime of fattening up. For medieval peasants and most modern-day people, meat is a luxury item to be consumed at special times. I’m certainly not going to swear it off, but I think in the future I’ll only order meat because it’s what I crave at the moment — not because it’s a staple for every meal. Right now, in fact, I’m craving a pita and hummus. I gotta find something to soothe this aching tummy.

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Second Supper vol. 9, issue 160

The five best foods you’ve never eaten

By Nate Willer

nate.willer@secondsupper.com As the Second Supper’s foreign correspondent I’ve eaten my way through 10 countries thus far. And I love to eat. I once ate 20 tacos in one sitting so my friend would have something interesting to write about for his English class.

There are very few foods I won’t try at least once. Each country has its own distinct tastes in food, and there are dozens of them that if I had my way would be available wherever I go.

These are some of those foods in no particular order.

Hw-ae (raw fish) A fine delicacy found in Korea as well as Japan. Hw-ae is straight up raw fish. It’s sliced into thin strips that are about the size of a club cracker and served on a giant plate with an assortment of dipping sauces and side dishes to accompany the fish.

A really good Hw-ae restaurant will not have a menu. Instead they will have several large fish tanks full of fish and you choose the actual live fish you want to eat. Hw-ae tastes less like the fish and more like the dipping sauces.There are three main sauces that are served with Hwae. The first is a red sauce called Cho-Go-Chu Jang. Which means vinegar spicy pepper sauce.

It is quite spicy and has sweet vinegar taste.

This sauce is used when you want to eat the fish alone. The second sauce is soy sauce and Wasabi mixed together. This stuff has some serious kick. Wasabi is made from horseradish and will make your eyes water and your nose run if you’re not careful and eat too much.

The Hw-ae is usually dipped in this sauce; then wrapped in a piece of lettuce with some garlic. The final sauce is called Sang-Jang. Which means bean sauce. Sang-jang is made with soybean paste and crushed red peppers. It is also spicy but not as spicy as the Cho-Go-Chu Jang. The Sang-Jang is usually reserved for the garlic or other vegetables on the table, but it tastes great when spread on the lettuce before the soy dipped Hw-ae. Hw-ae is almost

always eaten while drinking way too much Soju (Korean rice wine), it is also very expensive so most people don’t eat it on your average Wednesday night out. Hw-ae is also not for the faint of heart. The fish doesn’t taste like your Legion's Friday night fish fry fish. It tastes like fish, and the chewier it is the more fresh it is, but if you’re adventurous it’s a must eat.

Best Served With: A copious amount of So-ju (Korean rice wine) and someone with deep enough pockets to pay for it.

Fried Shark Fried shark is a food I’ve only seen on one menu throughout my travels. I found it at the Shangrila beach resort on Koh Samui island in Thailand.

And it was the best dish I had there. The meat was tender but not flaky like most fish. It was fried in olive oil and corn syrup with peppers and tomatoes. It was served with some rice, and tasted fantastic. The flavors danced around in my mouth long after the shark had disappeared. It was like no other fish I had or have ever eaten.The shark didn’t break into a million small pieces when you stabbed at it with your fork. The tomatoes were perfectly cooked and still held their shape too. The onions had just enough bite to give the shark a nice balance. If you ever find yourself in Thailand and are wondering if you should have the Pad Thai, the Margharetia pizza or the fried shark, I say without a doubt the fired shark. Your mouth will love you for it and the opposite sex will think you’re cooler than you really are after you tell them you’ve eaten shark.

Best Served With: A fresh fruit shake or a bottle or two of Singha beer.

Takoyaki Takoyaki is a popular food in Japan as well as Korea. Takoyaki is made with baby octopus or tempura or sometimes beef or pork. But true Takoyaki is always seafood. Accept no substitutes. Takoyaki also has some pickeled ginger and green onions in it and is held together by a flour bat-

15 things you've never licked I have a long and storied history of putting things in my mouth, so it was only natural that I would end up making an ass of myself and licking things for the Taste Issue. Without going into Jackass sewage chasing territory, I came up with a list of weird things to put on my tongue and describe.

In going through this list, I may have immunized myself to pretty much everything.

Cat — The beast in question picked up the name Catler for her dictatorial tendencies. She is used to my abusive ways, and did not protest when I lifted her and licked her head. The wad of hair that clumped on my tongue, however, left me spitting for minutes.Yum! Ash tray — It’s said that kissing a smoker is like kissing an ashtray, but I’m pretty sure that

April 23, 2009

I’ve never kissed someone and then dry heaved.

This felt like I had swallowed charcoal covered in hot sauce. This urban legend is hereby dispelled. Keep on smoking, my darlings!

Kiss’ “Lick It Up” — I only have this album on my computer and not a physical copy, so I had to resort to pressing my tongue to my computer screen, right up against Gene Simmons’ pendulous lapper. “Young and Wasted” played as I communed with rock’s biggest whore, and it felt good. Dirty with greed, but good.

Bar floor — This is an old trick that freaks out the kiddies. I’m not sure why licking a bar floor is so weird. If it’s made of tile, it’s cool and slightly dirty. If it’s made of wood, it’s room temperature and slightly tastes of marzipan.

If you avoid big clumps of dirt and puddles of vomit, no big deal. Pansies!

A quarter — It’s like licking a 9-volt battery without the sting. You get the metal taste, but there’s really no point unless that’s what you came for. Personally, I like chewing plastic.

Cash — Somebody this week told me to put

ter. Takoyaki is topped with mayonnaise as well as fish shavings, which give the dish its distinct look of being alive. The fish shavings move and twitch. It is a bit disturbing at first because they look a bit like small writhing critters trying to avoid being cooked and eaten. Takoyaki tastes quite "fishy" but with the right amount of mayo can taste like a Hellmann’s doughnut. Takoyaki is served all over Japan and Korea. In Japan it is served as a meal and the restaurant I went to had a griddle in the middle of the table and our Takoyaki was cooked in front of us. In Korea it is sold by street vendors and is often served in bars.

Best Served With: A bottle of warm Sake (Japanese rice wine) or a pitcher of fruit flavored So-ju.

Sha-bu Sha-bu Sha-bu Sha-bu is found in Korea, Japan and China. It is a soup made with a generous helping of vegetables, beef, noodles and rice. When ordering Sha-bu Sha-bu you’re usually given a choice between spicy, super spicy and fish broth. I recommend steering clear of the fish broth unless you like fish flavored beef. Shabu Sha-bu is one of the better soups here in Korea because it’s cooked at your table. Each table in a Sha-bu Sha-bu restaurant is equipped with a gas burner. The broth is brought to your table in a large pot and you’re given a plate of raw vegetables, a plate of thinly sliced raw beef, a bowl full of raw noodles, and a bowl of rice and some other vegetables.The meat is not usually eaten as a part of the soup.The vegetables are added first my money where my mouth is, so I pulled out a Hamilton from my wallet and crammed it in my loser face. It was anticlimactic, but I guess I could have made a pretty sweet spitball from all that capitalism.

Dumpster lid — I only licked a cardboard recycling dumpster, so I think I’m disqualified.

Moldy bread — I had moldy bread, but unfortunately I threw it away before this assignment. So I licked Gene Simmons again. Same thing. Dee-licious!

Shower curtain — My shower curtain is pretty bathtub ringed, but I didn’t really taste much beyond the tingeless plastic. I want to say that I tasted the filth, but it didn’t register.

Dashboard — Nobody cleans their dashboard — especially not me — so my station wagon of doom treated me to a typical buffet of dust. It was vile, but not so vile that I would ever clean my car so as to be able to lick a clean dashboard. Sloth wins!

Cass Street — Tastes of asphalt and crack houses. Whoopee.

Bike tire — Oddly enough, vulcanized rubber tastes pretty good, kind of like a barbecue

and then you dip the beef in the broth until it’s cooked and then eat it. After most of the vegetables and broth are consumed the noodles are added, cooked and enjoyed. The final indulgence is fried rice. After all the noodles, broth and veggies are securely inside your belly your server will come by and make the fried rice for you. Sha-bu Sha-bu is always a huge meal so it’s best not to try to eat it alone. It tastes a lot like beef and barley soup but with the added bonus of noodles and fried rice.

Best Served With: Beer (if your stomach has a volume of 6-7 liters) or So-ju (not because it tastes better, but because it’s less filling).

Grilled Marlin The Grilled Marlin I’m writing about is found in the Philippines. More specifically in Puerta Princessa on the Palawan Island. I don’t recommend going to the Palawan, unless of course you want to try the grilled marlin. I can’t remember the name of the restaurant but Puerta Princessa is pretty small and if you drive down the only paved road in town (seriously) and look for the biggest open air restaurant on that street you’ve found the spot.The place has cozy canopied tables outside. The marlin’s texture is similar to that of shark's but the marlin is much softer. Much like a majority of Filipino food the marinade for the marlin was heavy on the soy sauce, ginger and brown sugar.The marlin steak was grilled with some spicy peppers and some chopped onions. The dish also had some fresh steamed veggies and a large pile of rice. After a week in the Philippines, eating grilled shrimp, Greek salads, BBQ chicken, grilled crab as well as a fantastic Mongolian BBQ this was by far the best meal of the trip.

Best Served With: As many bottles of San Miguel Lager as you can get your hands on.

Well there you have it, folks.The five best foods you’ve never had, as told and eaten by your faithful Second Supper Foreign Correspondent.

So the next time you find yourself in Thailand, the Philippines, Japan or Korea be sure to try what they’ve got to offer. And if you follow my advice you certainly won’t be disappointed. I know I wasn’t.

without the sauce. I suppose this is more of a testament to my sensible choices of well-paved roads, free from dogshit.

Irish Spring — It didn’t have much of a taste up front, but as the seconds went by a minty aftertaste crept up from the back of my throat.

Soon it overpowered my entire mouth and made me want to gag. Oh god this is gross.

Nintendo DS — I tried to play my DS with my tongue, but it didn’t work. I can work my laptop’s touchpad mouse and my iPod’s trackwheel, but apparently Nintendo’s products are too snooty to respond to my tongue’s wiles.

Lame!

Beard — Like pubic hair without the croutons.

It’s appropriate that the worst thing I licked was a bar of soap (though the ashtray was a strong second). The lesson to be gained here is that we as a people are too afraid of dirt and grime, though fear of Gene Simmons is at a suitable level. I highly advocate a healthier attitude toward licking random things.

— Brett Emerson

11

Concert preview Think Pink

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Friday at the 'Corn, a tribute to Floyd

By Adam Bissen

adam.bissen@secondsupper.com There are generally two schools of thought when it comes to cover bands. There are the hair-sprayed dingos who strut the stage playing someone else’s music because they can’t make their own. And then there’s the other kind, musicians so studious they don’t even call their songs covers. They perform tributes.

Which One’s Pink?, a new project from five established La Crosse musicians, falls into the second category — which is good, since they’re tackling Pink Floyd. The group plans to perform a run of career-spanning, detail-obsessive, capable Pink Floyd tributes over the next few months, and the first one will be held this Friday night at the Popcorn Tavern.

In the total spectrum of rock and roll bands, it’s hard to imagine a more difficult group to reproduce than Floyd. The British group released 14 albums in its nearly 40-year career, and some of them are among the most iconic in rock history. Pink Floyd evolved from psychedelic pop-rockers to studio magicians to stadium fillers, and Which One’s Pink? plans to recreate it all.

“We’ve been practicing our asses off trying to get those minute details, because I keep saying that nobody wants to come and see a half-ass jamband version of Pink Floyd,” said Shawn Wooden, bassist for the tribute group and a fixture in the La Crosse rock scene.

“You can’t fuck with Pink Floyd. You’ve got to do it well and it’s got to be done tastefully, so we’re really trying our hardest to pull out all

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the stops, right down to the effects pedals they used.”

Which One’s Pink? started as an offshoot of the LAX All-Stars, a monthly performance curated by Art Hoffman that brings together different musicians for a one-off gig. The AllStars had previously done tributes to Bob Dylan and Phish, and Hoffman suggested a Pink Floyd tribute, partially in honor of Richard Wright, the group’s founding keyboardist who died last fall.

To fill out the Floydian lineup, Hoffman recruited Joel Neumann and Joe Kruezer for guitarists and Mark Smith to play drums. Those scoring at home will count five members of Which One’s Pink?, compared to Pink Floyd’s four, but even the original group added additional members to perform their songs live.

“Some people might call [Pink Floyd’s] music easy, but to try and redo it, that’s another thing,” said Kruezer in an interview last week over Wisconsin microbrews. “There’s a lot of technology, a lot of technique. They’ve got some great singers, too.”

Although Which One’s Pink? was founded for a one-time performance, Hoffman said the band developed such great chemistry that they decided to take the tribute idea and run like hell. Friday night’s Popcorn show, which begins at 10 p.m., is the first in a string of performances. In addition to a handful of La Crosse gigs, Which One’s Pink? is also booked to perform in Winona, Viroqua, Madison, Chippewa Falls, Iowa City, and Lansing, Iowa.

In preparing for the shows, Which One’s Pink learned most every song in the Pink Floyd catalog, from The Piper At the Gates of Dawn (1967) through the Division Bell (1994). Each concert, the group plans to perform three sets and an encore, with the middle set being a single album in its entirety.

In another nod to Floyd, Which One’s Pink? also plans to go all out with its stage show. On Friday it’s bringing in Chris Klower (renowned for his work with The Smokin’ Bandits) to run lights and lasers, and Wooden said that Hoffman’s keyboard setup is quite impressive.

And then there’s the final issue that seems to be a hang up for every cover band, Tribute or not: how to come up with a name. Neumann said the group struggled on the matter, before it settled on this lyric from “Have A Cigar,” the autobiographical ode to a group making it big: “The band is just fantastic/ That is really what I think./Oh by the way, which one's Pink?”

Second Supper vol. 9, issue 160

Reviews: Your Guide to Consumption Classic Amber Leinenkugel’s Brewing Company Chippewa Falls, Wisconsin I pity the fools that drink Leinenkugel’s but don’t live anywhere near Wisconsin. They think they’re getting the goods, but really they’re just poseurs. OK, maybe it is a bit tactless to brag about beer, but when you come from Wisconsin you don’t really have a whole lot else to puff yourself up with (other than dairy products and sausages and, umm, a history of Progressivism, I suppose). Leines, you see, is one of the state’s flagship breweries, one of a handful of Wisconsin beer makers that is known nationwide. In its 142-year history, the Chippewa Falls stalwart has turned out its share of great beer. It just prefers to keep the good stuff close to home and ship the fruity, gimmicky, or cheaply made stuff nationwide to a gullible public that sees a Wisconsin birthplace and/or a racist American Indian logo as bona fides for quality beer.

The first time I saw Sunset Wheat, for example, was in California and my first Summer Shandy came in Atlanta. They both tasted like shit, but for some reason my non-Midwestern friends were eager to drink them with me. Poor things, they’ve never tried a Lienenkugel’s Original, Red, Creamy Dark, or Honey Weiss, but they will be getting cases of this new Classic Amber year-round. Lucky for them, Leinenkugel’s fifth best beer isn’t half bad.

True to form, the beer pours an amber color, thinner than most other ales in this style, but it does have that nice lacey head that’s inherent to most Leine’s products. Unfortunately,

BEER

Review

it also has same musty, overly malted aroma that Appearance: 6 seems to accompany everything from Chippewa Aroma: 4 Falls. With lowered expectations, then, I raised Taste: 6 a glass — only to discover that it doesn’t taste Mouthfeel: 5 like most amber beers on the scene. While the Drinkability: 7 most adventurous amber beers come on with a hard hop bite (for a Total: 28 fine example, seek out Ale Asylum’s Ambergeddon), this Classic Amber seeps in slowly, more like a lager than an ale. The taste is all malts, nicely toasted but kind of underwhelming.

There are some strong caramel notes on the front end and a bit of a nutty finish, but this is a pretty one-dimensional beer. It taste’s like oldschool Leine’s though, so while the amber is a little watery it’s still highly drinkable. For the seasoned Leinenkugel’s drinker (of which I am one), it has a schizophrenic taste: the unforeseen combination of Leine’s Original, Creamy Dark, Red, and Oktoberfest. It’s not an excellent beer by any means, but it is an economical one, and perhaps it can help the country warm up to the true taste of Wisconsin.

— Adam Bissen

Bean Juice espresso I’ve spent plenty of time reviewing coffees from all over the world, and a handful of other random coffee-related conversations have occurred in this column. But I felt it was time to step up — oh yes, the time had come for an espresso review! I was hesitant to do a writeup of any espresso besides that which is made by my own hand, and for good reason: espressos are notoriously finicky, dynamic and ever-changing. There are many more factors that determine the quality of an espresso as compared to the old standby, coffee.

Espressos are often blends of various beans; the final shot depends greatly on atmospheric pressure, the fineness of the grind, the hand which tamps the espresso, the particular machine which runs the shot… there are just too many things that could go wrong. Unless you know a really great barista, a barista who you would trust with your own life (yeah, I’m hardcore). To Bean Juice I went, and two fantastic baristas greeted me with their smiling faces — Robin Cernak, barista extraordinaire, and Theresa Held, owner of the fine establishment.

I did a little investigation and found out that this blend is quite worldly — it has a bean from virtually every coffee-producing region on the planet: a South American, an African, a Cen-

April 23, 2009

tral American, and an Indonesian — very exciting. My first choice was a macchiato, which is a shot of espresso topped by a dollop of foam.

Robin was responsible for a beautiful presentation, a consequence of her well-known artistic talents. The demitasse contained a floating heaven of micro-bubble foam surrounded by rich, deep-gold crèma; I could hardly bring myself to imbibe such beauty. That was followed by straight espresso, pulled

by Theresa herself. The crèma on this espresso was a champion crèma, a matrix of texture and flavor that coated my taste buds in blankety goodness. The aroma promised an intense and bright espresso, and the mouthfeel was out of this world. There was a brilliant acidity that filled out the cup, and it found itself in counterpoint of fruity notes that weren’t at all over-powering. This espresso was intense, but not aggressive; it seemed energizing and not just from the caffeine.

A versatile espresso, this one would hold up well as an Americano or a latte easily. Bean Juice’s espresso presents a wild combination of excellent texture and full-bodied espresso that is sure to put a smile on your face.

— Amber Miller

Oh hi, right now I'm listening to the music of a guy who goes by the name of Jandek. It's also cloudy and bleak outside, which goes hand in hand with the audio in my ear. Jandek is perhaps the biggest enigma in modern music. He has self-released over 50 albums since 1978 by mail order only out of an office that goes by the name of Corwood Industries, located in Houston, which appears to be little more than a P.O. Box. The music itself is something that can truly be described as haunting, almost downright disturbing. In some ways, it reminds me or the aural equivalent of the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre movie in somber eeriness, as I could see the music composed in the same creepy Texas country house where Leatherface lived. The majority of his work consists of a sparse male vocalists who sometimes mumbles or howls accompanied by an atonal acoustic guitar tuned in seldom if ever used open tunings playing something strangely akin in vibe to the country blues and folk music of East Texas, artists like Townes Van Zandt, Lightnin' Hopkins, Blind Lemon Jefferson, Blind Willie Johnson or the field recordings made by people like Alan Lomax or Harry Smith. But while the heat-induced lazy aura of that region is similar to those cats, lyrically and sonically he is an entirely different ball of wax, not from just those above mentioned troubadours, but from pretty much anybody you could name drop. One could say Jandek is a troubled soul, one who lays his bleakest emotions on record as if torn from

gÉh Z c \ ^ 9Zh $RUGS 4HE

As seen in the case of Rage against the Machine, people tend to question public figures who gain fame and fortune by criticizing the established order. How can Rage reconcile a decade spent screaming about capitalism’s evils while releasing three major-label albums, a rarities disc, and a live performance — to say nothing of all the merch? In such cases, the messages typically get dismissed as entertainment, while the messengers are derided as two-faced. I disagree with this attitude; in fact, I feel that those most prominent in our human industries have the most responsibility to speak out against the errors within them. Very few people listen to an unfunded message, and those who infiltrate the system and speak out against it are not always propped up anarchists. Still, it’s not a bad idea to question these people’s true intentions.

Dr. Drew Pinsky has spent decades in both the public eye and in private practice. He has hosted the radio show Loveline for more than 25 years and has appeared in TV shows such as Celebrity Rehab. Alongside such public figures as Phil McGraw and Ruth Westheimer, Dr. Drew is one of America’s most known doctors. Thus, it’s both appropriate and questionable that Pinsky has written a book about the perils of celebrity-fueled narcissism.

For example, the book seems largely written in Pinsky’s tone of voice, leaving Dr. Young as a sideline player, an assistant. There is only one person on the book’s cover, and who it is shouldn’t be surprising. Still, it seems as though

the pages of a diary, personal stream of conscious murmurs that are the sort of bile that float around in the dark corners of our minds that only the deepest among us spend much time dwelling on. Don't mistake this music for some emo dweeb in tight jeans and MySpace glory though, it's nothing like that crap at all.

But the thing is, nobody knows who the man behind the mask of Jandek is, an individual who avoids leaving any traces to his identity, having given only two interviews to handpicked journalists in his career. Rumored to be a man named Sterling Smith, the cult of his personality as an outsider artist is as riveting a story as the music he creates. In 2004 he stunned his fan base by performing his first live performance in Glasgow, Scotland, though some choose to debate if the man on the stage was even the same guy who put out all the albums. A handful of concerts have taken place since then, as well as a documentary that's worth watching called Jandek on Corwood, which you could (and should) view in it's entirety on YouTube. Once the sunshine comes back, I'm sure Jandek will go back on my shelf, but while it's grey outside, it's a daydream moment of introspective emotions to match the mood created by the skies over La Crosse.

— Shuggypop Jackson

Medium: Literature Stimulus: Dr. Drew Pinsky & Dr. S. Mark Young — The Mirror Effect Anno: 2009 this book is on the side of the angels.

It begins with a cataloging of celebrity madness in our current culture, and how the phenomenon has grown into the beast it is now. Though not naming names beyond the tabloid headlines, the opening chapters make one wonder if this work is going to be little more than a celebrity dishfest. Soon, however, the book moves into its main purpose as a dissection of narcissism (here shown as self-loathing instead of ego), how the spread of technology has made it pandemic, the infection of teens, and how the public is savagely complicit in the creation and destruction of its idols. Solutions of empathy and compassion are offered; none are surprising, but considering the subject, it doesn’t hurt to repeat them.

One weird moment comes in the discussion of Jamie Kennedy’s semi-documentary Heckler, a film about unchecked criticism much in line with this book’s spirit. Dr. Drew speaks highly enough about the film to where I ended up watching it myself. And who should appear in that film but — Dr. Drew! While the message was relevant, it felt like a weird and potentially sneaky form of self-promotion.

Nonetheless, this book is a very worthwhile read on the state of the current madness, not compromising its smarts or vast importance while keeping its finger on the pulse enough to draw a crowd.

— Brett Emerson 13

Film

Future Sons by Noah Singer

The Great Buck Howard (2009) Director: Sean McGinly Cast: Colin Hanks, John Malkovich, Emily Blunt Writer: Sean McGinly There was a time when I looked back on my wildly unsuccessful creative writing attempts and noticed a peculiar trend: most of the stories I had written self-indulgently revolved around struggling, under-appreciated writers.

There's no better way to betray an amateurish understanding of the role of fiction than by writing about writers. In The Great Buck Howard, Colin Hanks — who played a struggling writer in his other biggest film, 2002's Orange County — plays that writer. And the worst part about his character? He's not necessary.

Combine the frivolity of Hanks' character with his painful non-acting and unsolicited tell-notshow narration, and you've pinpointed all the distractions in an otherwise hysterical satire on the entertainment industry.

It's through Hanks' Troy that we witness the life of Buck Howard, a has-been magician, or "mentalist," who performs before half-full theaters in po-dunk towns like Wausau, Wisconsin.Troy, a real condom-sniffer from the beginning, works as Buck's road manager to pay the bills whilst pursuing his fuzzy goals of "being a writer." What he sees is a man who, still bragging of having appeared on Johnny Carson

61 times, is oblivious to how much the limelight has passed him by. As a true lover of the craft, Buck continues to wow audiences night after night (he claims to put on 400 shows a year), especially with his trademark "effect," a trick in which he successfully finds his nightly cash payment after having audience members hide it in the auditorium.

Despite playing the title character, Malkovich feels underused as the quirky, egotistical Buck. He makes the most of a pretty insubstantial part, initiating many of the film's funniest jokes, including a running gag in which he greets people with a violently-exaggerated handshake.

There's enough hilarity and enough soft-spoken morality in "Buck Howard" to make this something more than a film quietly released into the pre-summer graveyard where movies go to die. Unfortunately, too much of the film revolves around Troy, and while writer/director Sean McGinly could have beefed up Malkovich's character, he was too busy funneling cheesy life lessons and campy writers' inside jokes our way through the purposeless Troy.

— Nick Cabreza

Zardoz (1974) Directed by: John Boorman Starring: Sean Connery, Charlotte Rampling Written by: John Boorman What the hell is wrong with Sean Connery?

No actor’s career is spotless — Medicine Man and The Rock will attest to this being true in Connery’s case — but this film will be forever remembered as The First James Bond’s most notorious performance. But even here, Connery manages to defy categorization. Most notorious films are so because they are said to be really bad — or at least fail to live up to expectations. People throw the word notorious around in describing films like Showgirls, Ishtar, and American Pie: Band Camp. Yet Zardoz does not gain its notoriety from being a bad film; it’s actually a high end art film that plays with its audience’s perceptions without reliance on cheap plot twists. John Boorman, the helmsman responsible for classic films such as Deliverance and Excalibur, knows how to put out a good flick (though critics would have you avoid the savaged Exorcist II). In Zardoz, Boorman delivers another fine work, full of high storytelling and 70s grade lust. Quality is not the issue here — though it is kind of funny to hear a flying stone head preach that the gun is good and the penis is evil.

No, what ensures Zardoz its place among cinema’s Holy Shit Pantheon is that Connery spends the majority of the film scrambling around in a braided ponytail, porn stache, thigh-high boots, and a bright red set of wres-

14

tling tights. His hairy chest is exposed throughout. Perhaps this wouldn’t be so amazing if the fashion criminal wasn’t Sean Connery, but as it stands, this is the gloriously worst costume seen on film.

This well-dressed scamp begins the film as a gunslinging barbarian named Zed, murdering for his flying stone head god — the titular Zardoz — in the Dark Ages of the future.

Soon, Zed becomes dissatisfied with the 9 to 5 and questions the lifestyle. He stows away on the magic head, caps the fool at the wheel, and autopilots to an immortal and sterile utopia.

The jaded locals treat him like a new pet as they prance around their perfect prison, but a larger conspiracy threatens to break them out of complacency and back into the world of life and death. Zed, who is the centerpiece of this plot, isn’t as base as he seems — at some point he even puts some pants on.

Though overshadowed by its wardrobe department, Zardoz is an expansively unique work of future dystopia. The explanation behind the name itself is one of the film’s most inventive moments. But a strong lesson can be learned here — not everything that came out of the '70s was good. Like Connery’s trunks, some of it was completely brilliant.

Reminds you to support the retailers, restaurants, taverns and bands that support us. We are funded solely by advertising so if you want to support us, support

conscientious commerce: TASTES LIKE VICTORY.

— Brett Emerson

Second Supper vol. 9, issue 160

I'm Jonesin' for a Crossword "Look Under the Cushions" — treasure where you least expect it.

By Matt Jones Across 1 Sanders' rank: abbr.

4 Takes in too much 7 Band box 10 QB's scores 13 ___-male 14 Cut branches (off) 15 Wade's opponent 16 Miner's find 17 Dream up 19 Gas station with a blue and red logo 21 Quad City that's home to the Mississippi Valley Blues Festival 23 "I found a ___, which blended into the beige. No way am I going to eat it."

25 Be 26 Palm whose berries are now used in fruit juices 27 Punk offshoot 30 Dreyer's ice cream, in the Eastern U.S. 31 Poultry dish with broccoli and cheese 36 Popeye's love Olive 37 Bullfighting cheer 38 "So that's where the ___ to this old pen went!"

39 Ballpark figure

66 Record label with a "Manhattan" offshoot 67 "___ to Billie Joe" 68 TV chef Martin 69 Runnable computer file suffix 70 Ointment

42 Ongoing NYC tribute project where musicians cover the works of other musicians 45 You, in olden days 48 "Entourage" agent 49 "I'm rich! No, just kidding. It's only a ___."

50 "Amazing" magician famous for debunking 52 Briny bath additives 56 Rule that ended when Turkey became a republic 59 "Ew...all I found were the stale rem-

nants of a ___."

60 "The Wapshot Chronicle" author John 63 Part of mph 64 "Much ___ About Nothing" 65 Brain scan, for short

Down 1 Laurence Fishburne TV show 2 Physics unit 3 Item used to fasten planks, in old shipbuilding 4 1966 Gold Glove Award winner Tony 5 "Singin' in the Rain" codirector Stanley 6 Go on a buying spree 7 With the bow, in music 8 Former "S.N.L." actor Jay 9 Actress Holly Robinson ___ 10 Doughnut-shaped 11 "The ___ Chaperone" 12 French legislative bodies 18 Suffix for anatomical reproductive

organs 20 Temptress 22 Went into a personal online chat, for short 23 Folded food 24 Stiff and sore 28 Karaoke bar eqpt.

29 Roundish 32 "Rock and Roll, Hoochie ___" (1974 hit) 33 Literary lioness 34 ___-do-well 35 G.I.'s address 39 Parent company of Popsicle and Skippy 40 They're in charge of the bldg.

41 Tends to priority number one?

42 ___ a wild goose chase 43 Greet the judge 44 If ___ (Kenneth Cole shoe) 45 Allegro non ___ (lively, but not too lively, in music) 46 It's far from love 47 Unabridged 51 Lance Bass headline, on a 2006 cover of People 53 Pageant host

Answers to Issue 159's "Triple Threats"

54 ___ Twin (alias of electronic musician Richard D. James) 55 It may force a city to surrender 57 Alan of "M*A*S*H" 58 Brightly colored 61 It'll never get off the ground 62 Messy morsel at a barbecue

2009 Jonesin' Crosswords (editor@jonesincrosswords.com) For answers to this puzzle, call: 1-900226-2800, 99 cents per minute. Must be 18+. Or to bill to your credit card, call: 1800-655-6548. Reference puzzle #0411.

Maze Efflux by Erich Boldt

ireless Free W et!

Intern ig Ten NFL, B rk!

Netwo

Great Study Environment right across from Onalaska High!

426 2nd Ave South Onalaska, WI 608.781.9999 - www.thetimbers.biz

(southwestern)

April 23, 2009

(soups & sandwiches) 15

COMMUNITY SERVICE [ Area food & drink specials ] LA CROSSE All Star Lanes Arena 4735 Mormon Coulee ArenaLAX.com

Alpine Inn Animal W5715 BlissHouse rd.

110 3rd st.

Alumni 620 Gillette st.

Beef & Etc.

1203 La Crosse st.

Barrel Inn 2005 West ave.

Barrel Inn 2005 West ave.

Beef & Etc. 1203 La Crosse st.

Brothers The Cavalier 306 st.

114 Pearl 5th ave.

Big Al’s 115 S 3rd st.

The Cavalier Chances 114 5th ave. R 417 Jay st.

CheapShots 318 318 Pearl Pearl st. st.

Chuck’s

1101 1101 La La Crosse Crosse st. st.

Coconut Joe’s 223 Pearl st.

Sunday

Monday

ALLfor NEW! 3 games $5 starts at 8 p.m. text

3 games for $5 starts Arenaat 8 p.m.

bucket special $2.00 Domestic Silos $2.50 Jack Daniel Mixers $2.00 Goldschlager

Beer Pong $7.00 w/dog 4Italian Cansbeef 8-close meal: $6.69 Pizza Puff meal: $4.49 2 for 1 cans &

bottles during 2 for 1 bottles and cans Packer games during the game 2.25 for mini pitcher

closed free pitcher of beer or soda with large pizza 12 - 7:

2-4-1 rails $2.50 beers

Buck Night starts at 6 p.m. to 83361

Bud Night 6 - CL: bottles $1$1.75 Domestic Taps $2$5 Craft Import Taps pitchers $2.50 Vodka Mixers $1 Shot Menu $7 22oz tbone 16oz top sirloin 9.75 sutffed sirloin 8 jack daniels tips 8 $1 shots of meatball sandwich Doctor, cherry doctor - 8-cl meal: $6.69 Happy hour 4-6 $1.75 cans, $2 mix drinks 2 Chicago dogs meal:

$5.891/4 barrel

giveaway Buck Burgers 8-11 $1 burgers 1/4 Barrel giveaway during Monday night meatballfootball sandwich

$2.50 Select imports/craft Beers $2.50 Top shelf Mixers $2 Mich Golden bottles

3 games for $5 starts at 7 p.m. for specials

Import Ladies drink night free Rails and Domestic starts at 7Light p.m.Tap Beer 9-11pm on the Dance Floor

Happy Hour64-p.m.

CL- 9 p.m. M-F $2 $2.50 DomesticSparks Silos $2.50 Premium Silos $2.50 Three Olive Mixers $2. Goldschlager

$1 softshell tacos $1 shots of meal: doctor, Italian beef cherry $6.69 doctor Chicago chili dog: $3.89 Bucket Night 6 beers

for $9meal: Italian beef $6.15 Chicago chili dog: $3.45 Thirsty

(rocks only)

77 -- CL CL Tequila’s Tequila’s chips chips & & salsa, salsa, $2 $2 Coronas, Coronas, $2.50 $2.50 Mike’s, Mike’s, Mike-arita Mike-arita

$3.00 Domestic Pitchers, $2.00 Shots of Cuervo, $3 Pitchers 1.75 Rails Rumpleminz, Goldschlager

Mexican Monday Guys'$2.00 Nite Corona, out 1.50 silos Corona Light, Cuervo

AUCD Taps and Rails

25 cent hot wings $1 shots of Dr. 25 cent wings Dollar

domestic pitchers barrel parties at cost $4.50 domestic pitchers Pitcher and Pizza $10

77 -- midnight midnight Ladies: Ladies: 22 for for 11 Guys: $1.50 Guys: $1.50 Coors Coors and and Kul Kul Light Light bottles bottles $.50 domestic taps, $1 microbrews, $3 domestic $.50 taps Domestic 3.00 pitchers, pitchers $6 microbrew pitchers

$2 $2Tuesdays, Tuesdays, including including $2 $2 bottles, bottles, import import taps, taps, beer beer pong, pong, apps, apps, single single shot shot mixers, mixers, featured featured shots, shots, and and 50 50 cent cent taps taps

WING WING NIGHT-$1.25/LB NIGHT-$1.25/LB BUFFALO, BUFFALO,SMOKEY SMOKEY BBQ, BBQ,PLAIN PLAIN $1.00 $1.00 PABST PABSTAND AND PABST PABST LIGHT LIGHT BOTTLES$1.50 BOTTLES$1.50 ROLLING ROLLING ROCK ROCK BOTTLES BOTTLES $2.25 $2.25 BUD BUD LIGHTS LIGHTS $1.00 $1.00 SHOT SHOT OF OFTHE THEWEEK WEEK

Wristband Night Wristband Night $5$5COLLEGE I.D. COLLEGE I.D. $9$9general public general public Karaoke Karaoke $1 shot $1 shot specials specials

7-CL:night football domestic beer: $1.50 $1.50 domestic Mexican beer:rails $2.00 pints, $1.50

7-CL: chicken $1.50 domestic primavera pints, $1.50 rails

7-CL: shrimp $1.50 domestic pints, burrito $2 craft pints, $1.50 rails

FiestaHollow Mexicana Fox 5200 Mormon Coulee

chicken & veggie fajitasown Build your for Mary two Bloody 16oz Mug - $4.00

football night domestic beer:Pizza $1.50 Homemade Mexican beer: $2.00 & PItcher of Beer

$9.00

N5292 Hwy 35 rd.

1904 Campbell $5.99 $5.99 gyro gyro fries fries & & soda soda

Huck Finn’s Howie's

127 dr. st.

1128Marina La Crosse

9-clNBC Mary night. (Night Bloody Before Class) $3 pitchspecials ers of the beast - 2 4-9 p.m.

Happy10 Hour

Football Sunday $1.75 domestic JB’s Speakeasy 11-7 happy hour, free The Helm 717 Rose st. food,bottles $1.50 bloody, 1/2

108 3rd st

price pitchers DTB

Arterial

$1.50 U call domestics and rails

1003 16th st 16

9-cl$3.50 Domestic pitchers $1.75 domestic bottles

Free Wings

live live DJ DJ $1 shot $1 shot specials specials

7-CL: chili $1.50 domestic pints, verde $2 craft pints, $1.50 rails

Ask 2server 3-9: for 1 for details domestic bottles and rail drinks

Fish

Euchre, 7 p.m.

HAPPY Fry HOUR 3 - 8

Buy Buy one one gyro gyro get get one one half half price price

free free baklava, baklava, ice ice cream cream or or sundae sundae with with meal meal

$1.25 $1.25 domestic domestic taps taps buy buy one one burger burger get get one one half half price price

EVERYDAY 3 -7 9-cl and$1.25 9 - 11 rails,

buy one get one Domestic $2.00 Malibu, $2.50 Jaeger, beerJaeger ('til 6 Bombs p.m.) $3.00 Holmen Meat Locker Jerky Raffle

$1.75 bottles/cans

Karaoke Karaoke OPEN-CL $2 U "Call" it

$8.95 16 oz. steak $8.95 1/2 lb. fish platter

Prime Rib

GREEK GREEK ALL ALL DAY DAY buy buy one one appetizer appetizer appetizer half price appetizer half price get get one one half half price price with meal with meal 9-cl -$2 captain mixers, $2 bottles/cans, $3 jager bombs

9-cl $2 bacardi mixers, $2 domestic pints, $1.50 shots blackberry brandy

HAPPY HOUR 5 - 7

All day (everyday!) $1.75 domesticspecials $1.25 Old Style Light bottles

Check our ad for specials

$1.50 LAX Lager/Light $1 shots of Dr.

$2 Domestic Bottles and Cans

most

Ask server for details

HAPPY HOUR 5 p.m. - 10 p.m.

$5 AUCD

12 - 7 cents off items

$2.50 JUMBO CAPTAIN AND FLAVORED FLAVORED BACARDI MIXERS BACARDI MIXERS $3.00 JAGER BOMBS $3.00 JAGER BOMBS

free wings 6 p.m. - 9 p.m.

HAPPY HOUR 9-cl- $1 rails, $2.50 pitchers, Beer Pong

50

Happy Hour 7 - 9. $2 for$2.50 all single shot mixers and all beers.

JUMBO CAPTAIN AND

beer pong 6 p.m. $8.95 16 oz steak

happy hour 1 -6 M - F $1 Most Pints, $2 Absolut Mixers

After ClassMixers $3 $2.00 Captain Pitchers $1.75 Rails

HAPPY HOURshrimp EVERYDAY 3 - 6 chili chicken burrito verde primavera $1.25 Bucket of Domestic 25 Cent Wings BURGERS Cans 5 for $9.00 HAPPY HOUR 6 AM - 9 AM

1908 Campbell rd.

10 - 50 CL: (increases cents per hour) $1.50 rails $1 rails

Italian beef meal: $6.15 2 Chicago dog meal: $3.00 Bacardi mixers/ $3.45 mojitos Great drinks! $2 Cherry Bombs $1.50 $1 Bazooka Joes bloody marys 11Happy a.m. Hour - 4 p.m

Happy Hour 12 - 7

$2.00 Cruzan Rum Mixers, $2.50 Ladies'Jameson Nite outShots, 1.50 $3.00 Raill Mixers mixers/ $2.50 X bombs

$3.00 Patron Shots $2 Pearl Street Brewery beers

chicken & veggie OPEN-CL fajitas $2 U "Call" it for two

Gracie’s Gracie’s 1908 Campbell rd.

$6.75 shrimp dinner 50 cent taps 4 - 7

77 -- midnight midnight $2 $2 Malibu Malibu madness madness $2 $2 pineapple pineapple upsidedown upsidedown cake cake

77 -- midnight midnight $1 $1 rail rail mixers mixers $2 $2 Bacardi Bacardi mixers mixers

Fiesta Eagle'sMexicana Nest

Lakeview Goal Post

$2 Cherry Bombs $1 Bazooka Joes

beers & rails

Ladies Ladies Night Night buy buy one, one, get get one one free free wear wear aa bikini, bikini, drink drink free free

N3287 County OA

pepper & egg sandwich meal: $4.50, fish sandwich meal: $4.99, ItalianCaptain sausage meal: $3.00 mixers/ mojitos $6.15 Great drinks!

All day, everyday: $1.00 Shots of Doctor, $2.00 Cherry Bombs, $1.75 Silos of Busch Light/Coors All day Everyday: $1 Doctor $2 Silos. M-F: Happy Hour 2-6 $.50 off everything but the daily special

closed closed

$2.50 X-Rated Mixers $2 Captain Mixers $2 Premium Grain Belt $2 Snake Bites

batterfried cod, fries, Italian beef meal: pepper & egg sandwich beans, and garlic bread $6.69 meal: $5.50$5.00 2 Chicago dog meal: Italian sausage meal: $6.69 $4.50$5.89

Topless Topless Tuesday Tuesday

5200 1914 Mormon CampbellCoulee rd.

$2.50happy Bomb Shots hour $2.50 Ketel One Mixers $2 Retro Beers "Your Dad's Beer"

Cosmic $1 cherryBowl bombs starts at 9 p.m. until midnight

AUCE wings $5.00 free crazy bingo hamburger or cheeseburger buy one cherry meal: bomb $3.89 get one for $1 Italian Beef w/dog meal: 3 p.m.$7.89 - midnight

$1 $1 Kul Kul Light Light cans cans

411 3rd st.

3-7

$2 Silos

Saturday

$5 bbq ribs and grilled chicken sandfries wich meal: $5.29 Polish sausage meal: $4.49

$4 $4 full full pint pint Irish Irish Car Car Bomb Bomb

Dan’s Place

Cosmic & $1 cherryBowl bombs Karaoke starts at until 9 p.m. midnight

Stop in for Value Menu too big to list here

$6.00 AUCD

bucket night 6 for $9

Friday

shots of Doctor hamburger meal: 8-1 $6 sandgrilled chicken $3.69 wich meal: $5.29 meal: $6.15 HAPPY HOUR 3 PM - 8 cheeseburger PM meal: Polish sausage meal: 2 dogs meal: $ 5.25 10 cent wings (9 - CL) $3.89 $3.99 Martini$2.50 Ladies' Night Wristband $1 High Life 6- 8bottles All Mojitos $5 Blatz vs. Old Styletriple James Martini: vodka, $1.50burgers, rail mixers$2.60 soup orNight salad bar $1.25Tuesday make your own $2.25 meatsec, orpitchers marinara orange juice $1.50 taps $2 Guinness pints FREE with entree or tacos, $4.75 taco salad cheeseburgers, $2 off spaghetti: $3.45 $2 HAPPY large pizza, $1 fries4 - 7 sandwich until 3 p.m.

HOUR 7- CL: $4.95 $2.25 margaritas, Italian sausage: 3- CL: 7- CL: 7- CL: ($3.95 by itself) largeclosed taco pizza with $1 anyDr. pizza Martini Madness shots Margarita Monday off 2 for 1 2 Beers, Ladies' Night Guys' Night 61-topping 8 p.m. pizza $2 off $2.50 all martinis $3 Jager Bombs taps $11 $1.25 beers & rails $1.25 $1.50 rails/domestics

77 -- CL CL $1 $1 domestic domestic 12 12 oz oz $2 $2 Stoli Stoli mixers mixers

closed closed

Tuesday Wednesday Thursday

$2 U Call it imports $3 Crown Mixers

$5 All Pitchers

$2 Corona/Corona Light, $4 Patron

$2 Stoli Mixers, $1 DR Shots

Second Supper vol. 9, issue 160

Area food food & & drink drink specials specials ] COMMUNITY SERVICE [Area LA CROSSE JB’s Speakeasy 717 Rose st.

The Joint 324 Jay st.

Legend’s

Sunday

Monday

Tuesday Wednesday

$1.75 domestic bottles

$1.75 domestic bottles

$1.75 domestic bottles

1/2 off Pearl Street pitchers during Packer game

4 - 8 p.m.

Bacardi $3 doubles/pints

closed

223 Pearl st.

closed

Nutbush

Thursday

Friday

Saturday

HAPPY HOUR 5 - 7 $1.00 off all Irish shots $2.50 pints of Guinness $3.00 imperial pints

$2 domestics and rails, 4-8

4 - 8 p.m. domestic bottles/rails $1.75

4 - 8 p.m. domestic bottles/rails $1.75

WING NIGHT $2 SVEDKA MIXERS $2.50 JACK MIXERS $2.25 BUD LIGHTS $2 SHOTS OF ALL DOCTOR FLAVORS

closed

AFTER COMEDY: PINT NIGHT $1 PINTS OF RAILS MIXERS AND DOMESTIC TAPS $2 PINTS OF CALL MIXERS AND IMPORT TAPS $3 PINTS OF TOP SHELF MIXERS

5 - 7 p.m.

2-4-1 happy hour

great drinks!

$2 SHOTS OF GOLDSCHLAGER $5 DOUBLE VODKA ENERGY DRINK

HAPPY HOUR 3 - 6

3264 George st.

Players

Price by Dice

214 Main St

Ralph's

In John's Bar 109 3rd st. N

Ringside 223 Pearl st.

Schmidty’s 3119 State rd.

2 for 1 Happy Hour ALL NIGHT LONG

Chef specials daily Mighty Meatball sub $6

CLOSED

CLOSED

breakfast buffet $9.95 10 a.m. - 2 p.m.

BBQ Sandwich

Karaoke @ 10 p.m.

2-4-1 Happy Hour 5 - 10 AUCD Rail mixers @ 10 p.m.

Karaoke @ 10 p.m.

2-4-1 Happy Hour 5 - 10 $1 Pabst cans, Dr. shots @ 10 p.m.

chicken parmesan sub $6

Italian sandwich w/banana peppers and parmesan &6

open 4-9

Buck Burgers

Sports Nut 801 Rose st.

Train Station BBQ 601 St. Andrew st.

Top Shots 137 S 4th st.

Yesterdays 317 Pearl st.

LA CRESCENT

Crescent Inn 444 Chestnut st.

WINONA Godfather’s 30 Walnut st.

April 23, 2009

HAPPY HOUR 4 PM - 7 PM cheeseburger HOOP DAY!! MAKE YOUR SHOT AND YOUR ENTRÉE IS FREE!

2-4-1 Happy Hour 3 - 8 Best Damned DJ'S @ 10 p.m.

Chicken salad on rye w/ lettuce, tomato, onion $5 $6.99 FISH SANDWICH FOR LUNCH, $7.99 FISH SANDWICH FOR DINNER, $9.99 ALL YOU CAN EAT FISH FRY ALL DAY

happy hour all day long! $1.00 OFF WILD WINGS, $1.00 PHILLY STEAK AND CHEESE.

Chili Dogs

Tacos

Fish Sandwich

12 oz. T-Bone $8.99

Fish Fry $6.95

All day (everyday!) specials $3 Double Captain & Cokes $2 Double rails $1 Cans of beer

120 S 3rd st.

1019 S 10th st.

Southwest chicken pita $5

2-4-1 Happy Hour 3 - 9 Best Damned DJ'S @ 10 p.m.

LUNCH BUFFET $6.95 Tacos

Shooter’s

Tailgators

double $6.50

2-4-1 Happy Hour 5 - 10 $2 Capt. mixers $1.75 domestic beer, $1.50 Rails, $1 Pabst cans @ 10 p.m.

happy hour all day

$4 domestic pitchers

Tacos $1.25

15 cent wings

HAPPY HOUR 10 AM - 12, 4 PM - 6 PM $2 Bacardi mixers

$2 Spotted Cow & DT Brown pints

Bucket Night 5 for $9

closed

11-3: Extra side with sandwich 4-9: $1 off rib dinner

Special varies

11-3: Barn burner $7.95 4-9: Hobo dinner (serves 2) $30.95

$1.75 light taps and Dr. shots

$1.50 Bud/Miller Lite/ PBR taps all day $1.75 rails 10 - 1

$2 domestic bottles 7 - 12, $2.50 Skyy/ Absolute mixers 10-1 $2 Dr. drinks

$1 Point special bottles

$2.50 pints Bass & Guinness

$1.75 domestic bottles

$2.25 Pearl st. pints $1.50 PBR bottles

Sunday

Monday

Tuesday Wednesday

$2 Rolling Rocks $2 domestic beer

8 - CL $1.50 rails $1.75 Bud cans

$1 shots of Dr. $2.50 Polish

Sunday

Monday

Tuesday Wednesday

ask for great eats

Fiesta Night 7 - 12 $2 tequila shots $2.50 margaritas

family buffet 5 -8 kids under 10 pay .45 cents per year of age

$1 domestic taps $3 Jager Bombs

5 domestic bottles for $10, $2 Bacardi mixers, $1.50 rail vodka mixers 10 -1

$1 Dr. shots $3 16 oz Captain mixers 11-3 $7.95 Chicken on fire 4-9: Bones & briskets $13.95

$2 Long Islands, PBR bottles, Captain mixers

15 cent wings

$1 Dr. shots $3 16 oz Captain mixers 1/2 Chicken 3 bones $12.95

$2.75 deluxe Bloodys ‘til 7, $5 lite pitchers 7 - 12

$1.75 rails $1 PBR mugs

Thursday

Friday

$2.50 Captain $2.50 Jager Bombs & Polish

$2 u-call-it (except top shelf)

Thursday

Saturday

Friday

Saturday

any jumbo, large, or large 1 topping pizza medium pizza up to 5 $9.99 toppings: $11.99 (get 2nd large for $5)

17

Ã

Thursday, April 23 Del’s Bar Nick Shattuck and Friends The Root Note Open Mic Night Popcorn Tavern Chuff Nighthawks Dave Orr's Damn Jam

Just A Roadie Away...

April 25, continued 10:00

The Root Note Beauford Firebeard

8:30

Nighthawk's Milktoast Mania

10:00

10:00

My Second Home Paxico

10:00

10:00

The Waterfront Jim Bee Three

7:00

8:00

5:00

Howie's Karaoke

Valhalla at UW-La Crosse Augustana 7:00

8:00

The Joint Moon Boot Posse and Snowbelly Bitchhog

Cavalier Lounge Kin Pickin'

10:00

Friday, April 24 The Waterfromt Jim Bee Three Popcorn Tavern Which One's Pink?

Freight House Dan Sebranek and Hans Meyer The Joint Dave Lambert Blues Band

8:00 10:00

8:00 10:00

The Timbers Don D. Harvey

10:00 8:00

10:00

Popcorn Tavern Shawn's Open Jam

8:30

Piggy's Blues Lounge Shufflin' Duprees

Popcorn Tavern Paulie

10:00

8:00

The Joint Brownie's Open Jam

10:00

Northside Oasis Dan Berger and Friends

10:00

American Legion Patu Baton w/ T.U.G.G. Hoffer's Tavern Pulse 8

Popcorn Tavern Smokin' Bandits

5:45

Del's Bar Kevin Koutnik

7:00

9:00

Baus Haus Greg "Cheech" Hall

7:00

18

9:00

Fri. 4/24

Ed's Bar

Fri. 4/24

The Fountainheads

Accoustic Cafe

Fri. 4/24

Pudge Pampuch

American Legion

Sat. 4/25

Jeremiah Nelson and the Shifty Switches

Gate City Jazz Band

Ed's Bar

Sat., 4/25

Jefferson's Riverside Center

Sun., 4/26

Wednesday, April 29 Popcorn Tavern Mitch's Open Jam

10:00

Draught Haus

Tuesday, April 28

8:30

Saturday, April 25

Thurs., 4/23

Houghton’s Hootenanny w/ Mike Caucutt 10:00

Howie's Comedy

10:00

Trouble Shooter

Ed's Bar

10:00

9:00

Nighthawks Dr. Mel and the Medicine Men Blues Show

Starlite Lounge Miles Johnson Quartet

27,069

Monday, April 27

Northside Oasis Sell Out

The Root Note The Ericksons w/ Josh Franke 8:30

Thumbelina, Baby Guts, Le Deux Magots

Sunday, April 26 Popcorn Tavern Eric and Al

Winona population

Bluff Country & Drew Peterson

Starlite Lounge Kies & Kompanie

Howie's The Freezers

Ã

Entertainment Directory 4/23 - 4/30

10:00

69.6514

l 608.7 l a C s t e k c i T r o F

Got a show?

Let us know!

We'll put it in, yo. editor@secondsupper.com

Second Supper vol. 9, issue 160

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Good People, Good Drinks, Good Times $2.00 - 1 Player, $3.00 - 2 Players 50 Cents Off Drinks, $1 Off Pitchers

$1.75 - Light Taps $1.75 DR. Shots

Saturday April 23, 2009

$1.50 Bud/Miller Lite $2.00 Domestics 7-12pm & PBR Taps $2.50

$1.75

Skyy/Abs. Mixers 10-1AM

$2.00 Dr. Drinks

$2.75 Deluxe Bloody Marys ‘til 7:00 PM $5.00 Light Pitchers 7:00PM - Midnight 19

20

Second Supper vol. 9, issue 160