Second Supper

BEST OF LA CROSSE: VOTE FOR YOUR FAVORITES • WWW.SECONDSUPPER.COM

La Crosse's Free Press VOLUME 10, NO. 13 | APRIL 8, 2010

La X bards share their words page 4

ALSO ...

Documentary features La Crosse 'Human Google' Page 9

PLUS: CSAs SUPPORT YOUR LOCAL FARMER • PAGE 6 | BUSINESS NETWORKING • PAGE 5 | ADVICE GODDESS • PAGE 10

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Second Supper

Social Networking

NAME AND AGE: Amanda Torrison, 24 WHERE WERE YOU BORN? Ozaukee County CURRENT JOB: Lead banquet server @ Radisson DREAM JOB: Being the CEO of my own personal resort LAST THING YOU GOOGLED: The address for the King of Diamonds strip club in Minnesota IF YOU COULD LIVE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD, WHERE WOULD IT BE? In a treehouse on a tropical island WHAT IS SOMETHING YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE? I think it would be cool spend a year to go and reconnect with people I've lost touch with.

IF A GENIE GRANTED YOU ONE WISH, WHAT WOULD YOU ASK FOR? The ability to fly, hands down CELEBRITY CRUSH: Lyndsey Mothertruckin Lohan FIRST CONCERT YOU WENT TO: I believe it was a Less Than Jake concert when I was 14 at the Rave in Milwaukee.

WHAT IS YOUR BEVERAGE OF CHOICE? A Whatchutalkin About Stout from Pearl Street Brewery WHAT BOOK ARE YOU CURRENTLY READING? Books really aren't my thing.

TELL US YOUR GUILTIEST PLEASURE: Coloring in coloring books WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST PET PEEVE? When you are in a conversation with a person who never lets you talk TELL US A JOKE: What do you call two lesbians in a closet? A liquor cabinet WHAT'S THE LAST THING YOU BOUGHT? Hamburgers and hamburger buns at Festival WHAT'S IN YOUR POCKET RIGHT NOW?: Cell phone, a hole, a dollar, a pin from St. Patrick's Day, and two baretts WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PART OF SECOND SUPPER? The show listings of when people are playing downtown HOW DO YOU KNOW SHUGGY (INTERVIEWER)?

He is my super awesome upstairs neighbor that is soooooooo rad and adorable — Shuggypop Jackson, shuggypop.jackson@secondsupper.com

Second Supper

Things To Do Get some musical therapy at the Pump House

The Top

Overrated poets 1. Emily Dickinson 2. Charles Bukowski 3. Robert Frost 4. Billy Collins 5. Allen Ginsberg 6. Mary Oliver 7. William Wordsworth Things that should be neutral 1. Internet bandwidth 2. Judges 3. The line of scrimmage 4. Switzerland 5. Sport coats 6. The MSM 7. Pro athletes' political views

April 8, 2010 // 3

FIRST THINGS FIRST

Lucy Kaplansky, the folk singer who became a psychiatrist and then found her way back to the stage, will perform at 7:30 p.m. Saturday, April 10, at the Pump House Regional Arts Center, 119 King St. Kaplansky had been scheduled to perform at the Pump House in February, but a snow storm forced her to cancel. Early in her singer career, Kaplansky teamed with Shawn Colvin, and those folk sensibilities remain part of her acoustic performances, which also tap into a classic country style. Kaplansky has six records released

by Red House Records, the latest — Over the Hills — in 2007.

She also released a single, "Life Threads," co-written with her husband, Rick, in collaboration with a cosmetics company with a fragrance line bearing the same name. Tickets are $15 for members, $18 for nonmembers; $21 day of the show. For information, call (608) 785-1434. The Pump House, 119 King St., is open from noon to 5 p.m. Tuesday through Friday and from noon to 4 p.m. Saturday. And speaking of the Pump House ...

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Meet a pubished poet

April is National Poetry Month, so be sure to read the winners, on Page 4, in Second Supper's first poetry contest. The Pump House Regional Arts Center's April visitor in its reading series also knows a thing to two about poetry. Karla Huston of Appleton is the author of six chapbooks of poetry, including "Flight Patterns," which won the Main Street Rag chapbook contest and most recently "An Inventory of Lost Things" (Centennial Press). Her visit is scheduled for 7 p.m. Thursday, April 15, at the Pump House, 119 King St. For information, call (608) 785-1434.

2

Check out a traditional pow-wow

The 34th traditional 3 Rivers La Crosse Pow-Wow will take place Saturday and Sunday, April 10-11, at Mitchell Hall on the UWLa Crosse campus. Admission is free with a nonperishable food donation. Grand entry begins at 1 p.m. and 7 p.m. on Saturday and noon on Sunday. There will be a meal at 5 p.m. Saturday. Participants include Chris Grezlik, master of ceremonies; Boye Ladd, arena director; Paul Cloud, head male dancer; Elena Greendeer, head female dancer; and co-host drums Lake Delton and Midnight Express. For information, call (608) 317-3664, e-mail hinuga1@aol.com or visit www.3riverspowwow.com.

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Support those with disabilities

4

The Student Occupational Therapy Association at UW-La Crosse will host Project Funway at 1 p.m. Saturday, April 10, at the Valley View Mall. Project Funway is a nonprofit event promoting inclusion and featuring models who have disabilities. Clothing for the event has been donated by Maurices, Vanity, Herbergers, Buckle, Tradehome Shoes, Pacific Sun Wear, Aeropostale, JC Penny and Christopher & Banks.

Hear a young but successful vocal band

A young group that does not fit the mold of a traditional a cappella band will perform at 7 p.m. Thursday, April 15, at Valhalla Hall in the Cartwright Center of the UW-La Crosse campus. Comprised of four classically trained vocalists, the group InPulse covers a wide range of musical styles, performing songs from groups as diverse as Rascal Flats and Aerosmith, Michael Jackson and The Eagles. Campus Activities Magazine last month named InPulse runner-up for the 2009 “Band of the Year” in its annual readers choice awards. The concert is free.

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Second Supper

COMMUNITY

The bards: Second Supper poetry contest winners “TO THE MEN NO LONGER IN MY LIFE” — 1st PLACE

By Marci Madary

To the men no longer in my life I thought you were interesting.

I mean really interesting.

Your words, like catching honey on my tongue.

Your ideas brilliant even before their utterance.

Your stories captivating;

Your humor witty and clever.

But your psychosis became apparent through rumors on the wind, like the moon emerging from clouds.

Thank you for not calling me.

CLASSIFIEDS FREE RENT: Campus Housing, 4 & 5 bedroom units, single bedrooms available. Contact (608)7823776 and ask about our “free rent” special!

2 AKC registered English Bull Dogs for free, if interested contact; rioandy123@gmail.com HELP WANTED: Second Supper needs a reliable independent contractor to serve as a sales account representative. Hours are flexible but must be available at least 16 hours per week, be outgoing and able to meet weekly deadlines. Call Roger at (608) 782-7001. Pay is commission only.

To advertise, call (608) 782-7001

Second Supper 614 Main St., La Crosse, WI 54601 Phone: (608) 782-7001 Online: secondsupper.com Publisher: Roger Bartel roger.bartel@secondsupper.com Editor in Chief: Adam Bissen adam.bissen@secondsupper.com Student Editor: Emily Faeth emily.faeth@secondsupper.com Sales: Mike Keith mike.keith@secondsupper.com Sales: Jenaveve Bell jenaveve.bell@secondsupper.com Sales: Ansel Ericksen ansel.ericksen@secondsupper.com Contributors: Amy Alkon, Erich Boldt, Nick Cabreza, Brett Emerson, Jake Groteuschen, Shuggypop Jackson, Matt Jones, Carolyn Ryan, Stephanie Schultz, Anna Soldner

I thought you were good looking.

I mean fine, fine looking.

Flattered by your obvious attention.

Drawn to your cologned confidence.

Intrigued by the flirting game;

Thrilled by unimagined possibilities.

But the endless supply of sentences beginning “I” numbed every cell in my brain.

Thank you for not emailing me.

I could have fallen in love with you.

I mean really fallen.

Knees weak, forgetting to breathe fallen.

Not remembering my responsibilities fallen.

Neglecting my children fallen;

Ready to sell my body or whatever else was required fallen.

With one encouraging look, with one blush of love, I would have fallen in so many destructive ways.

Thank you for not loving me.

I owe you all a debt of gratitude because if you had called,

if you had emailed,

if you had loved me, I would have sacrificed an emerging, remarkable me.

SELFISH AS SHELLFISH — HONORABLE MENTION

By Melissa Meyer

There once was a talking board with curves of melons and humps like pillows.

But she was bored as a board.

She walks through shopping centers with her daddy’s plastic spending hundreds.

She throws away her food if it’s “getting cold.”

But what does she know?

Selfish like shellfish I always say.

One day she said out of the blue, What happens if everything we are is nothing? …coming from the girl who thinks she is something, else.

What happens if everyone is nothing?

Aren’t we all just a speck?

Why are we here?

There are more galaxies out there, We aren’t the center.

So what are we compared to the Unknown?

I fainted…almost.

She is so flat like a board, flat like old soda in my fridge for a week.

Maybe all humans were meant to wonder.

Even the shallow scum pond swimming in plastic.

A rusty windmill makes slow circles in the sun waiting for a breeze — Arla Clemons (1st Place)

A poem pokes itself Into the mind of one who’s Shoveled the way clear — Marya Washington Tyler (HM)

Editor's Note: We would like to thank the many poets who participated in our first poetry contest. The top four winners in each of our categories (free verse and haiku) are reprinted here. First place in free verse earned Marci Madary $100; first place in haiku earned Arla Clemons a $50 gift certificate from Downtown Main Street Inc. THREE MINUTES — HONORABLE MENTION

By Kelleen Nolan

The seconds toddle by as I wait on your cold tub’s edge.

The fear congeals hardens and bounces in my gut, potentially attacking a temporary resident. nonononono NO I rise to my feet, fear driving me up. This isn’t the plan. This isn’t the man I want to spend my life with.

The shrill scream bounces around in the shower and pushes me against the door.

I sob and my shudders exhaust my strength. I fall to the floor.

A final tear crawls down my face as I realize I haven’t known your name even half as long as this would take.

In my right hand the tell-tale test.

In my left hand the pill I missed.

RUSTY ROOM — HONORABLE MENTION

By Karo Hoffman

Most of the time I forget, but today I think of him driving along to a place he has not yet chosen with the sun and wind his only steady companions. His house on wheels — built for a king with its red rusty body and mattress that hardly fits one. Oh, how he loves the road and the strangers he calls friends.

Because he finally went to school, this year he paid more in taxes than he earned all the years before—he now fixes carburetors and has to rent an apartment. He is twice as old as I but three times as lonely. I can imagine that he will meet a woman on the net, someone he connects with like he does all strangers he meets.

Someone he connects enough with to keep it in park and buy a larger mattress. flu’s end…

March. Ice has melted. curry and beer Mississippi is rushing. at last First barge rumbles by.

— Lynne Valiquette (HM) — Mark K. Larson (HM)

Second Supper

Dispatches from HQ New home brew shop open in downtown

The House of Hops home brew shop opened April 6 at 413 Jay St.

Owner and knowledgeable home brew veteran Chris Vial has been planning for two years to open a shop to offer all the essentials for people to make beer and wine from home, from the first time novices to the experts. He decided on a La Crosse location over one in Tomah, which is closer to his home of Mauston, due to the rich brewing tradition in the city.

Vial hopes to start offering beer- and wine-making workshops and have brewing competitions in the summer. The House of Hops will be open Tuesday through Saturday.

For more information, call (608) 7824780 or online at www.thehouseofhops. com.

Incumbents fare well, turnout low in Tuesday's election

LOOKING AHEAD THURSDAY, APRIL 8

who is transforming the cultivation, production, and delivery of healthy foods to underserved, urban populations.

FRIDAY, APRIL 9

7–9:30 p.m.

Mryick Hixon EcoPark Owl Prowl — Learn about these amazing birds and hike at night in Hixon Forest.

THURSDAY, APRIL 15

6-8 p.m.

Franciscan Spirituality Center Movie, Food Inc. — Filmmaker Robert Kenner lifts the veil on our nation's food industry, exposing the highly mechanized underbelly that has been hidden from the American consumer with the consent of our government's regulatory agencies.

SATURDAY, APRIL 17

SATURDAY, APRIL 10

9–5 p.m.

Mryrick Hixon EcoPark Prescribed Burn School — For volunteers who want to help area conservation organizations with prescribed burns: $30 for members of MHEP, TPE and MVC, $35 for nonmembers, $20 for students.

SUNDAY, APRIL 11

12:30-5 p.m.

WTC parking lot, corner of 7th & Vine CSA Farms Bus Tour — Learn about Community Supported Agriculture and tour two organic family farms set amidst the rolling hills of Vernon County’s farm country. Bus picks up and returns to same location. Cost $5.

10 a.m.-noon La Crosse Main Library Preserving the Summer Harvest — Meet Mary T. Bell author of several food drying books and freezing expert Marge Loch-Wouters to learn great techniques to prepare for the 5th Season.

1–4 p.m.

Three Rivers Waldorf School Beginning Homemakers Cheese 101 — Learn the basics of cheese making using fresh goat milk while making three different types of cheeses. Cost $50.

TUESDAY, APRIL 13

7–8:30 p.m.

UW-L Crosse Graff Main Hall Auditorium (2nd floor) Will Allen of Growing Power, Inc. — A recipient of a 2008 MacArthur Foundation Fellowship, Allen is an urban farmer

Describe your typical day: I generally work a 10-hour day, which consists of checking out patients, answering billing and insurance questions, and preparing claims to insurance companies.

On Saturday, May 1, a Beer Collectible Show will be held at Concordia Hall, 1129 La Crosse St., from 9 a.m. to 2 p.m. This show will be filled with a variety of cans, trays, signs, bottles and other beer paraphernalia detailing the rich history of beer.

Appraisers will be available free of charge to determine the value of collectibles people bring in. Food and beer will be available.

Admission is $2, and a table fee of $1 a foot for people who wish to display their collections. For more information, contact Lowell Peterson at (507) 895-8276.

Registration for classes at The Yoga Place, located at 444 Main St., Suite 204 will start on April 12. The next session begins on April 26, and there will be classes for all levels, from beginners to advanced, teaching Iyengar yoga. Founder Chris Saudek has been a yoga instructor since 1982 and has traveled to India numerous times to study at the Iyengar Memorial Yoga Institute.

For more information, call (608) 7842622 or visit www.yogalacrosse.com.

6:30-8:30 p.m.

La Crosse Public Library Main Auditorium Movie screening, FRESH — FRESH celebrates the farmers, thinkers and business people across America who are re-inventing our food system.

Business Networking

Concordia to host beer collectibles show

About 9 percent of eligible La Crosse County voters cast ballots on Tuesday in an election that saw most incumbents retain their seats. Coincidently, only 9 of the 35 county board races were even contested, and incumbents won seven of those races.

In District 3, Bill Feehan, a local Republican leader, topped incumbent Joe Veenstra 142 to 92. Onalaska alderman Dan Ferries beat incumbent Ann Fisher 165 to 114 in the District 31 race. In the race for District 5, which includes much of the UW-La Crosse campus, incumbent Brad Konkel defeated fellow student Jason Krug, 97-40. Former Assistant U.S. Attorney Brian Blanchard defeated Richland County Circuit Judge Edward Leineweber 3,240 to 2,517 to win a seat on the District 4 Court of Appeals.

The Yoga Place offers vareity of classes

April 8, 2010 // 5

COMMUNITY

SATURDAY, APRIL 17

SATURDAY, APRIL 17

2:30-7 p.m.

Unity Park, East Lake Winona Winona Earth Day — Free concert in the park featuring performances by Lucy Michelle and the Velvet Lappelles, a folk-pop sextet, and Magic Mama, an eco-edu-tainer who celebrates organic hip-hop. Also with vendors, exhibitors and food.

Favorite part of job?

The importance to detail.

Least favorite part: The intensity.

Any helpful advice for those considering a similar career?

Pay close attention to detail, and know how to multitask.

NAME AND AGE: Shannon Howard, 30 Occupation: I am an Administrative Assistant.

What do you do?

I perform routine clerical and administrative functions such as billing and insurance filing, and assist patients with questions they may have in regards to billing and insurance.

Education: I have a BA in Sociology and Criminal Justice, and an Associate’s Degree in Dental Assisting.

Why did you choose this field?

I wanted to work in health care, helping people.

One interesting fact about your job: I make my living off of human relations.

Where's your favorite lunch spot?

Outside in the sun, when I can.

Favorite way to unwind?

On a long walk with my husband and children.

Any interesting knickknacks in your office?

No, just pictures of my children to remind me of what’s waiting at home.

Where do you see yourself in 10 years?

I will more than likely be where I am at, but maybe working fewer hours, and spending more time with my children.

How do you know Nikki, last month's interview?

I met Nikki through my husband's co-worker Ben, Nikki's boyfriend.

— Compiled by Anna Soldner, anna.soldner@secondsupper.com

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Second Supper

COMMUNITY

Support your local family farmer; join a CSA

By Adam Bissen

adam.bissen@secondsupper.com

Consider for a moment, the origin of your vegetables. Do you know where they came from? In America, most food travels on average 1,200 miles from a farmer’s field to your dinner plate, so unless you have a particularly generous cousin in the San Joaquin Valley, you probably look at produce as just another commodity to buy in the store.

The corporatization of America’s food supply doesn’t merely affect your wallet and carbon footprint, it also changes your vegetables. In order to ship food such great distances, produce is often picked before it’s ripe and genetically modified to have tougher flesh. And since farmers take on huge monetary risks at the beginning of the growing season, they have extra incentive to spray their fields with pesticides and fertilizers — whatever it takes to ensure maximum yield.

But it doesn’t have to be that way. Community supported agriculture, or CSAs, are a growing movement in America’s food economy, and there are at least 15 CSAs that serve the La Crosse market. To join, members make a monetary contribution at the beginning of the growing season (generally around $500) and in return receive a bushel of just-harvested and always rotating fruits and vegetables every week for about five months.

“It’s the freshest produce you can have,” said Mary Ann Phalen, a La Crosse resident

who has been a CSA member for the past six years. “A lot of it has been picked in the last 24 hours and traveled less than 50 miles. You just can’t get fresher produce, and the taste difference is amazing!”

Over the past decade, more and more farmers have come to adopt the CSA model.

Agriculture can be a capital-intensive industry, and with several months between planting and harvest, it can be a risky one as well.

That’s why farmers appreciate the upfront payments of CSA members. They have cash on hand to buy seeds and pay farm hands, and by effectively selling stock in the farm, the business’ risk and rewards are spread among all CSA members.

Jillian Jacquinot, co-owner of LaFarge’s Small Family CSA, spent her younger years traveling the world and working on different farms. About six years ago she had her eyes opened to the CSA model after she worked for a stint at Angelic Organics, a massive CSA outside of Chicago with about 2,000 members. After returning to the Coulee Region she met her fiancé, Adam Varney, at a local organic farm, and the two set off to till their own soil.

“I really wanted my own farm, but I didn’t see how it would be financially possible with no real capital,” Jacquinot said.

“CSAs just seemed to open that window so I thought, ‘Yes, I can actually do this!’”

Now in its fifth year, the Small Farm CSA is looking to serve about 150 members.

After starting with only 25 members, the CSA has grown steadily over time as more

people in the Coulee Region have come to understand the model.

Depending on the CSA — its size, cost, number of farmers, whether it has a greenhouse, etc. — members sign up to receive produce boxes for a harvest season that can last between 10 and 30 weeks. The contents will change depending on what’s ripe, but Cate Eddy, co-owner of Viroqua’s Ridgeland Harvest, said she likes to keep her CSA boxes stocked with staples like onions, garlic, broccoli and carrots. The rest is a mixture of common fruits and vegetables and “those delicious things our grandparents talk about,” like kohlrabi, fennel, Swiss chard and shallots.

With around 250 members, Ridgeland Harvest ranks as a medium-sized CSA. Every Wednesday it drops off member baskets at sites in La Crosse, Onalaska, Viroqua, Black River Falls, Madison and Verona.

“Really, the CSA [model] is what has enabled us to farm full time and continue to build infrastructure on the farm and raise children,” Eddy said. “We see a loss of many farmers in our region because the bottom line can’t be sustained. So I think it’s a real tribute to community agriculture that people realize it’s important for all farmers to stay on the land.”

Few places in the country are served by more CSAs than the Coulee Region. They range from small family operations with a single pickup point to the mammoth Harmony Valley in Viroqua, which has nearly 1,000 members, reaches the Twin Cities and

offers delivery through December.

The Bear Creek Farm in Blair, Wis., sits at the opposite end of the CSA spectrum.

The farm has offered free-range, grass-fed beef since 2002 and is just starting its vegetable CSA this summer. The Bear Creek Farm already sells its Angus beef on a large scale to Organic Valley, “but we wanted something a little more personable,” said Christine Wilson, who owns the farm with her husband, Bob.

Like a lot of local CSAs, the Wilsons already sell some of their product at the Cameron Park farmers market, where Christine loves talking to people about her farm. The 20 members of her CSA are welcome to drop

by Bear Creek at anytime, and she’s organizing four “family fun days” between June and October.

That’s a hallmark of all CSAs: a connection to the farm and the folks that grow your food. Almost every CSA organizes farm days for its members, and most distribute a weekly newsletter with photos, updates and recipes for all the new vegetables. By “personalizing” the produce, people become connected to the meals they eat. It’s not just another thing to buy; food becomes a way of life.

“Everyone should come out and see what we’re doing,” Wilson said. “We want to tell people how wonderful farming is, number one, because it’s a great lifestyle. But we also want to show how everyone should find a safe, reliable source for their food — because not every food source is so safe or reliable.”

Directory of Area CSAs BEAR CREEK FARM N26893 Hwy. 53, Blair, WI 54616 (608) 796-3666 www.bearcreekfarm.net Deliveries: 22 Cost per share: Full: $550, ½: $300 Note: Also offers grass-fed beef, free-range chickens and farmfresh eggs DRIFTLESS ORGANICS 50561 County Road B, Soldiers Grove, WI 54655 (608) 624-3735 www.driftlessorganics.com Deliveries: 20 Cost per share: Full: $575, ½: $350 Note: Also offers sunflower oil shares and grass-fed organic beef packs FEATHERSTONE FRUITS & VEGETABLES 43090 City Park Road, Rushford Village, MN 55971 (507) 864-2400 www.featherstonefarm.com Deliveries: 21-22 Cost per share: Full: $640, ½: $490 Note: Winter shares $200-220 for boxes every other week in November and December.

HARMONY VALLEY FARM S. 3442 Wire Hollow Road, Viroqua, WI 54663 (608) 483-2143, ext. 2 www.harmonyvalleyfam.com Deliveries: 14-30 Cost per share: Full: $885 (30 weeks), ½: $561 (17 weeks)

Note: Also offers organic fruit, organic cheese and organic coffee shares.

JACKSON HOLLOW FARM S1291 Hayes Valley Road, Mondovi, WI 54755 (715) 946-3329 www.jacksonhollow.net Deliveries: 18-20 Cost per share: Full: $500, ½: $300 Note: Partners with a local Amish family; free range chicken shares are $150.

KEEWAYDIN FARMS 15270 Haucke Lane, Viola, WI 54664 (608) 606-0373 www.keewaydinfarms.com Deliveries: 26 Cost per share: Full: $520, ½: $260 Note: Spring Greens Share, $150 for 4 weeks; Winter Storage Share, $210 for 2 large deliveries LAUGHING SPROUT FAMILY FARM E7904 Briar Bluff Road, Reedsburg WI, 53959 (608) 228-3426 www.laughingsprout.com Deliveries: 20 Cost per share: Full: $450, ½: $250 (10 weeks) Note: Also sells cut flowers and will have late season pickles, salsa, and spaghetti sauce.

LYNWOOD FARM CSA W229 Cedar Valley Road, Stoddard, WI 54658 (608) 483-2718

www.Localharvest.org (Lynwood Farm CSA) Deliveries: 9 or 18 Cost per share: Full: $25 membership and $20 for each delivery, ½: $25 membership and $14 for each delivery Note: Boxes include flowers and herb bunches when available.

OLD OAK FAMILY FARM N6370 Niedfelt Road, Bangor, WI 54614 (608) 486-4205 www.oldoakfamilyfarm.com Deliveries: 20 Cost per share: Full: $550, ½: $300 Note: Membership full for 2010 season.

RIDGELAND HARVEST E5538 Nelson Road, Viroqua, WI 54665 (608) 675-3855 www.ridgelenadharvest.com Deliveries: 22-23 Cost per share: Full: $625, ½: $450 Note: Beef bundles: 15 lb. for $110, 25 lb. for $175, 50 lb. for $325; Pork bundles: 15 lb. for $75, 25 lb. for $125, 50 lb. for $250.

SMALL FAMILY CSA S2958 W. Salem Ridge Road, La Farge, WI 54639 (608) 625-4178 www.smallfamilycsa.com smallfamilycsa@yahoo.com Deliveries: 20 Cost per share: Full: $412 Note: Also offers a chicken share and a fall share that is an extra two boxes.

SMITH GARDENS FARM S2257 Yaeger Dugway, Cochrane, WI 54622 (608) 626-2122 www.smithgardensfarm.com Deliveries: 20 Cost per share: Full: $520, ½: $300 Note: Eggs, chicken, lamb, and jams also available.

WHITAKER FAMILY PRODUCE S2822 Garner Hill Road, Hillsboro, WI 54634 (608) 343-4500 www.whitakerfamilyproduce.com Deliveries: 20 Cost per share: Full: $600, ½: $450, ¼: $300 Note: Offers a pay-by-week payment plan.

WISE ACRE PRODUCE CSA 33841 156th St., Harmony, MN 55939 (507) 951-6104 ochtrup@harmonytel.net Deliveries: 20 Cost per share: Full: $450 Note: Offers chicken, pork, eggs and Thanksgiving turkey shares WOODARD RIDGE CSA 1626 Pine Ridge Drive, Onalaska, WI 54650 (608) 519-0674 www.localharvest.org/woodardridgecsa Deliveries: 22 Cost per share: Full: $675 Note: Full share includes a complimentary family membership to Clearwater Farm.

The WisPolitics.com Stock Report Is on Vacation and Returns Next Week

Second Supper

April 8, 2010 // 7

Guest Artists Kenni Holmen April 16 & 17

Nicholas Payton April 16 & 17

43rd Annual

Fred Steele April 15 Connie Evingson April 15

APRil 15-18

Bringing world‑class jazz to Western Wisconsin.

Richie Cole April 17 Randy Sabien April 18

Plan your weekend getaway to beautiful Eau Claire, Wisconsin!

Matt Turner April 18

Four days | six ConCerts | Great Jazz Tickets available online: www.eauclairejazz.com

Get your tickets now at

www.eauclairejazz.com or by calling 715-836-4092 facebook.com/eauclairejazz

twitter.com/ECJazzFest

www.eauclairejazz.com

8// April 8, 2010

Second Supper

ARTS

The Arts Review The Designer's Drugs Media: Book vs. Film Stimuli: The Shining Combatants: Stephen King, Stanley Kubrick

I’m about to drop some blasphemy. I think that Stanley Kubrick’s version of The Shining is a mediocre adaptation of Stephen King’s original novel. That isn’t to say that Kubrick didn’t make a creepy film with some classic horror moments, but it has

nothing in common with its source material. Kubrick seemed so intent on creating iconic moments that he ignored characterization almost entirely. The result was so devoid of personality that Stephen King himself was known to rail against it, and many years later he brought about a new film that was more true to his novel.

Much of the problems in Kubrick’s adaptation lies solely in the casting. For the majority of his career, Jack Nicholson has served as the gold standard for creepy acting. Likewise, Shelley Duvall is the quintessential mousy actress, fulfilling many of her roles with bug-eyed terror. After casting such actors, did Kubrick even need a script?

Nicholson was gonna break out his wolfish grin and go nuts, while Duvall was going to cower in a corner and take abuse. All Kubrick needed to worry about were elevators of blood and creepy twins. The rest ran on autopilot.

While the film and book are superficially similar in story, King’s work actually delivers characterization instead of caricatures. The Jack and Wendy Torrance of his

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book are fairly young and attractive people in dire straits. Jack is a teacher and literary man who destroyed his life with alcoholism — a trait that mirrors King’s own substance abuse problems in his early career. Spending an off-season at the Overlook Hotel is meant to be a starting over for Jack, allowing him time and space to get his writing career back on track. Throughout, his wife is supportive, but not in the same dimly masochistic manner of the film. Along with their psychic son — who, like everyone else, is less creepy in the book — King’s Torrances are shown to be a real family, damaged, yet still trying to keep everything together.

Even the horror elements of each work are fairly matched. Nicholson’s axewielding tribute to Ed McMahon is the film’s best moment, and there’s plenty of spooky imagery to support it. But due to the time limitations of film, Kubrick couldn’t convert every moment, and he left out quite a few of King’s hotel horror exhibits.

And let’s face it, Kubrick ending the film with Nicholson getting lost in a hedge maze and freezing to death is a bit anticlimactic.

King delivers a more violent ending, one of the rare cases of a film being more subdued than its source material.

But hey, at least the film had Scatman Crothers.

Winner: Book — Brett Emerson

Bizarro Masterpiece Theatre Medium: Film Harry Knuckles and the Pearl Necklace (2004) Director: Lee Gordon Demarbre Stars: Phil Caracas, Jeff Moffet, Ian Driscoll Writer: Ian Driscoll

After creating Jesus Christ, Vampire Hunter — the best movie about Jesus Christ, EVER — Canada’s favorite son Lee Gordon Demarbre continued to amass Bizarro film cred with another glorious entry in his Harry Knuckles series. Phil Caracas, Demarbre’s Scott Bakula-looking Lord, once more dons finger fuzz and fights the forces of evil!

Narrated by Barack Obama’s twin brother, the story of Pearl Necklace is a sordid tale of

sasquatches, jewelry theft, virtual reality, evil twins, pro wrestling, and hot babes fighting awkwardly.

Mr. Knuckles bursts onto the scene when he foils a pair of thieves who are making off with Bizarro master Menahem Golan’s artwork. From there, a pair of smokin’ fine ladies recruits Harry to track down Bigfoot, who has stolen a radioactive pearl necklace. From the start, these ladies are not who they appear to be, and figuring out their true allegiances comprises a large part of the story.

But they aren’t the only dames with whom Mr. Knuckles crosses paths. Pearl Necklace’s show-stealing moment comes when Harry, always looking for a good bargain, takes his truck to the Unknown Gas Station. Ol’ Unknown, played by writer Ian Driscoll, is a snazzy-dressed gas pumper with a paper bag for a head, who swivels his hips and prances around like a vaudeville kingpin. When he runs afoul of two bondage nuns and gets decked in the face, Unknown’s bag head gets a black eye and he slumps to the ground, leaving Harry $20 worth of gas time to take down the nasty nuns. Following his inevitable victory via vagina punch, Mr. Knuckles drives off to a Nintendo orchestra of triumph.

Yet do not assume that this glorious movie is a one-trick pony! One great moment comes while Mr. Knuckles is digging for clues about the nefarious conspiracy surrounding the pearl necklace. For answers, Harry enters a dark and dingy bar and encounters Bizarro legend Lloyd Kaufman!

Wearing a giant sombrero and intermittently spewing coins from his mouth, Kaufman challenges Harry to a drinking contest, and awesomeness ensues. Meanwhile, Harry’s best friend, Mexican luchador hero Santos, is led down the parallel roads of love and betrayal, making an awesome joke about masked safe sex before fighting his way out of a wedding ambush. Ultimately, the goodness and purity of both men prevail. Kind of.

Jesus Christ, Vampire Hunter is a titan of cinema, to be sure, but having watched Pearl Necklace, I have become a committed fan of Lee Gordon Demarbre beyond the Lord.

No matter how many pedestrians walk into his shots, Demarbre is a comic genius!

— Brett Emerson

Second Supper

ARTS

Total recall

April 8, 2010 // 9

La Crosse's own 'Human Google' in film festival

By Nick Cabreza

nicholas.cabreza@secondsupper.com

La Crosse radio anchor Brad Williams has a gift that could qualify as a super power.

Awarded the moniker "the Human Google"

by Good Morning America, Brad is one of three known people with hyperthymesia, a condition that allows him to remember pretty much everything.

Brad and his infinite-database of a memory are the subjects of the documentary Unforgettable, which will premiere at this year's Wisconsin Film Festival. The film has been a labor of love for Brad's brother and firsttime documentary filmmaker, Eric Williams, whose idea for the film was sparked by a 2006 Huffington Post article about a study involving a woman with a memory similar to Brad's.

"When we became aware of the University of California–Irvine study of the first person with 'superior autobiographical memory,' my first thought was that they had to meet Brad," said Eric, a native Wisconsinite who now lives in L.A. Williams had found the starting point of an adventure worth documenting. "This type of memory is almost unfathomable to the rest of the world, so that ongoing curiosity about the subject made me feel like there might be an audience for our movie," he said. "Once they agreed to study Brad, my main goal was to follow whatever happened, in hopes that some kind of trajectory would emerge."

"Unforgettable was basically handed to me," he observed. "When you find out that scientists want to study your brother's brain because they know of only one other person like him, how could you NOT make a movie about that?"

Making the movie

Eric began following his brother Brad — a news anchor for the La Crosse Family Radio Group — in the summer of 2006. In the ensuing four-year journey, Eric devoted virtually all of his time, effort and money to documenting his brother's adventures.

The project presented Eric — a screenwriter used to committing his ideas to paper first — with a unique challenge: shoot the footage first and assemble the story later.

"I enjoyed the process, especially editing, which is when a documentary is really created," he said. "I loved figuring out how to

PHOTO COURTESY OF GOOD MORNING AMERICA

Brad Williams of La Crosse, shown here waiting to be interviewed on Good Morning America, is the focus of a documentary, Unforgettable, premiering next week in Madison.

At a Glance

WHAT: Screening of Unforgettable WHEN: Friday, April 16 WHERE: Monona Terrace, Madison FYI: For tickets and other information, visit www.unforgettabledoc.com.

piece everything together, how to pace it, how to match it with music. That was more fun than writing a screenplay, where you're writing a blueprint for a film that may or may not ever get made."

Brad's experiences produced an array of interesting footage. Good Morning America, Jimmy Kimmel, Regis and Kelly — they all sought interviews with Brad. The Human Google likewise found himself competing in a trivia match with Jeopardy! juggernaut Ken Jennings, and he also had his nickname put to the test when challenged to answer questions faster than a librarian using Google.

Eric eventually amassed over 80 hours of footage. "I compare editing the movie to making a really complicated mix tape," he explained. Editing grew to consume most of Eric's free time, and, as he put it bluntly, "The biggest challenge of making Unforgettable was making Unforgettable."

The WI Film Festival premiere

Unforgettable arrives at a Wisconsin Film Festival (April 14-18 in Madison) loaded with intriguing documentaries. The more light-hearted Unforgettable should provide a nice retreat from the more serious docs, like My Neighbor My Killer (about the Rwan-

dan genocide) or The Most Dangerous Man in America (about the Vietnam War).

Eric Williams has compared his film stylistically to past memory-themed documentaries Spellbound and Wordplay. "They both were so entertaining and so warm in their portrayals of the people they profiled. I'd like to think we've got a similar tone and sense of humor," he said.

The WI Film Festival has a tradition of embracing films and filmmakers with ties to the Badger State. Part of the festival's "Wisconsin's Own" series, Unforgettable will screen Friday, April 16, at Madison's Monona Terrace. The premiere also doubles as a de facto homecoming for its director, a graduate of the University of Wisconsin.

"I'm really happy that the premiere will be in Madison, which is still one of my favorite places on earth, except in the winter," he said.

"Unforgettable has been the most fulfilling project of my career," admitted Williams.

"It'll be interesting to see it on a huge screen with a live audience. If I hear them laughing, I'll be very relieved. It should be less stressful than if our first screening were at one of the huge festivals, but I'm sure I'll be nervous. Brad is much more unflappable than I am. Through this whole experience, nothing much has fazed him."

Williams hopes to screen his film at more festivals (the movie will also play California's Big Bear Lake International Film Festival in September), but the April premiere may be the only chance for La Crosse to see its own Human Google in action any time soon.

Eric added, "Unforgettable is very likely the only feature film ever to include the Rivoli marquee and the Doerflinger's building.

How can you pass up a chance to see that?"

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10// April 8, 2010

Second Supper

ADVICE

The Advice Goddess

By Amy Alkon amy.alkon@secondsupper.com The dawg whisperer

In the wake of revelations about Sandra Bullock’s cheating husband, I’m wondering about your take on why she’s with him. She doesn’t seem like the usual low self-esteem type who goes for bad boys.

— In Bad Boy Recovery Myself

It seems women have a crafting gene.

Martha Stewart taps into hers, and like a one-woman swarm of rickracking, spongepainting locusts, transforms everything in her path. Other women start by perking up flowerpots and end tables and move on to unsuitable men. There’s no rush like walking into a room with a changed man on one’s arm (even better than the feeling of having much better shoes than all the other women at the party).

There’s evidence this transformation is doable — at least in movies starring Jennifer Aniston. The ideal subject is the man no other woman has been able to domesticate.

The woman tells herself he just hasn’t met the right woman (her, of course!). With her unique brand of beauty and heart, she will do the impossible: paper-train the wolf and get him to roll over on command. It’s love as brainwashing, “Beauty and the Beast” with a pole-dancing twist: “I’ll make you forget those strippers!”

Unfortunately, like the leopard and his spots, the wolf and his big-boobed, tattedup she-wolves are not soon parted. There’s a reason Bullock’s husband previously married a porn star, and it probably isn’t because he thinks porn stars make the best mothers. Maybe he wanted to turn over a new leaf with Bullock, and maybe he did for a while, becoming the sort of guy who rides the lawn mower into the sunset instead of the chopper into the strip club parking lot.

But, change is hard, maybe even impossible, save for the most determined and self-disciplined. Even they may have to hit bottom a few times (and, no, not the naked, tattooed kind). So, if you’d like to stay “in bad boy recovery,” the most you should ever expect is to influence a man — maybe to cut back on foods labeled “screamin’ hot nacho cheese-flavored” and to avoid dressing like he was naked and ran into a Salvation Army and put on whatever was closest to the door.

Look for a guy who already seems together, and take a good look at his past because it’s a pretty good key to what (or who) he’ll do in the future. Should you find yourself jonesing for a project, see what you can do with a hot glue gun, a spray can of gold paint and 26 packages of macaroni. Whatever you come up with, it’ll at least be distracting, and definitely less misery-inducing than that fun game you project daters like to play, “Spot the tall, dark, handsome captain of industry in the chronically unemployed drug user with the personality disorder.”

Fuzz kill

I just started hanging out with a woman I was good friends with in high school. To my shock and dismay, she now has a mustache! She has dark hair but wears glasses — maybe she can’t see it herself. I don’t feel close enough to her to say something, but she’s recently divorced and about to start dating, so maybe I should anyway … but how?

— Hair-ified

Maybe slip it into conversation. You know, “Why did the caterpillar cross your upper lip? Wait … he isn’t crossing … it seems he’s injured or dead!” OM, that would be mean — but nowhere near as mean as all those friends of hers refusing to endure the few moments of conversational discomfort it would take to clue her in. Sorry, make that supposed friends, because if you’re actually this woman’s friend, HOW DO YOU LET

My Reality?

HER GO AROUND WITH VISIBLE FACIAL HAIR?!

We’ll assume she isn’t mustachioed because waxing would kill her chances with the circus. And unless she lifted her arm and you spotted cornrows, she’s probably one of those women with the unfortunate combination of fine, dark hairs and vision issues — causing her to be in the dark about her desperate need to mow. In addition to wrecking her chances with any guy whose feminine ideal isn’t Tom Selleck, every single person who ever talks to her is thinking only one thing: “She’s got a mustache, she’s got a mustache, omigod, she’s got a mustache.”

It’s a mission of mercy, letting a furlipped woman know. You could take her for a girls-getting-their-nails-done session, then suggest she join you in the two-for-one lip wax (a nonexistent special prearranged by you). There’s also the gentle mention — “Did you know you have the faintest line of hair just above your lip?” (Even if it's “faint” like the African bush.) If neither of those work, there’s always tricking her into it: “Let’s play a game - it’s called ‘let’s put adhesive tape on our upper lips and pull!’”

Amy Alkon's just-published book, "I see rude people: One woman's battle to beat some manners into impolite society" is available from McGraw-Hill ($16.95).

Got a problem? Write Amy Alkon, at AdviceAmy@aol.com. (c) 2010, Amy Alkon, all rights reserved.

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Second Supper

April 8, 2010 // 11

MUSIC

music directory // April 9 to April 15 FRIDAY,

just a roadie away

April 9

Madison

FREIGHT HOUSE // 107 Vine St.

population

LaBarge (father/daughter duo) • 8 p.m.

HUEY LEWIS // APRIL 19-20 Northern Lights Theatre • $45-$55

NEUIE'S NORTH STAR // 1732 George St. Junkyard Saints (supergroup) • 8 p.m.

STEVE MARTIN // APRIL 20 Pabst Theatre • $55-$75

NIGHTHAWKS TAP // 401 S. Third St. The Levitating Train Committee (rock) •

FLAMING LIPS // APRIL 21 Riverside Theatre • $38.50

10 p.m.

NORTH SIDE OASIS // 620 Gillette St.

THRICE // APRIL 24 The Rave • $17

Olson/Dunn Band (rock & country) • 9 p.m.

ONALASKA AM. LEGION // 731 Sand Lake Road Time and a Half (rock & country) • 7 p.m.

PEARL STREET BREWERY // 1401 St. Andrew St. Don Joe Band (f/ Peter Townsend) • 5 p.m.

PIGGY'S BLUES LOUNGE // 501 Front St. S. Tom Hipps Trio (blues) • 8 p.m.

In what has become a semi-annual treat, Great American Taxi will return to the Joint on Monday night and turn the place into a boogie-down honky tonk. Taxi may be best known as the current outlet for Vince Herman, formerly the banjo player for Leftover Salmon. But it’s also the outlet for keyboard player Chad Staehly, better known locally as the brother of Christian Staehly (who himself is better known as “Chubba,” or “that guitar player from the Smokin’ Bandits.”) So that explains the La Crosse connection and how the Joint regularly pulls in one of the top acts of the jamband scene — now forget all that and just go to show. It will be some swampy, funky, grass n’ roll, the kind we only get ‘bout twice a year.

NIGHTHAWKS TAP // 401 S. Third St.

LA CROSSE PUBLIC LIBRARY // 800 Main St. The King Everything Rock & Blues Revue Phat Cats (Django jazz) • 1:30 p.m.

• 10 p.m.

POPCORN TAVERN // 308 S. Fourth St. POPCORN TAVERN // 308 S. Fourth St. Our American Cousin, Adam Without PIGGY'S BLUES LOUNGE // 501 Front St. S. The Sunday Blend (fusion) • 10 p.m.

Eve (bluesy garage rock) • 10 p.m.

Tom Hipps Trio (blues) • 8 p.m.

SHER BEARS // 329 Goddard St. Good Tymes (classic rock) • 8 p.m.

THE CAVALIER LOUNGE // 114 5th Ave. N. Dox Phonic (electric grass) • 10 p.m.

THE ROOT NOTE // 114 4th St. S.

Driftwood, Henry and X4 (experimental)

• 8:30 p.m.

THE WAREHOUSE // 324 Pearl St. Set it Off, Joel Tock, London (pop) • 7 p.m.

SATURDAY,

April 10

VITERBO FINE ARTS CENTER // 929 Jackson St. Platinum Edition (show choir extravaganza) • 7:30 p.m.

JB'S SPEAKEASY // 717 Rose St. Plow (w/ TBA) • 10 p.m.

MAPLE GROVE // W4142 Highway B Highway 16 (rock & country) • 8 p.m.

208,054

POPCORN TAVERN // 308 S. Fourth St. Blackwater (funk & soul) • 10 p.m.

SOUTHSIDE COMM. CENTER // 1300 S. Sixth St. Bluegrass jam • 1 p.m.

THE JOINT // 324 Jay St.

April 12

T.U.G.G. and Jon Wayne and the Pain (reggae) • 10 p.m.

MONDAY,

THE ROOT NOTE // 114 4th St. S.

POPCORN TAVERN // 308 S. Fourth St. Shawn's "Pot Luck" jam • 10 p.m.

Boo Bradley and Grand Picnic (roots/ Americana) • 8:30 p.m.

THE WATERFRONT TAVERN // 328 Front St. Dan Sebranek (acoustic) • 8 p.m.

NORTH SIDE OASIS // 620 Gillette St.

Urine, Fuzzy HD, Blue Collar Slobs (rock & roll) • 9 p.m.

THE JOINT // 324 Jay St. Great American Taxi (Colorado boogie) •

10 p.m.

April 11

FIRST PRESBYTERIAN // 233 West Ave. S.

La Crosse Chamber Chorale ("Come, Creator Spirit") • 3 p.m.

BROTHER ALI // May 1 Turner Hall • $15

WEDNESDAY,

April 14

DEL’S BAR // 229 Third St.

Travis Oppelt and Garrett Gilbertson (acoustic) • 10 p.m.

NIGHTHAWKS TAP // 401 S. Third St. The Bad Axe Band (open jam) • 10 p.m.

POPCORN TAVERN // 308 S. Fourth St. Open jam • 10 p.m.

THURSDAY,

April 15

JB'SSPEAKEASY // 717 Rose St.

Sterus with Dan Tedesco and the Long Haul (rock!) • 10 p.m.

NIGHTHAWKS TAP // 401 S. Third St. Dave Orr's Damn Jam (open jam) • 10 p.m.

April 13

TUESDAY,

POPCORN TAVERN // 308 S. Fourth St.

SUNDAY,

NOFX // Apri 29 Riverside Theatre • $20

TBA • 10 p.m.

THE JOINT // 324 Jay St. SOMA (open jam) • 9 p.m.

THE ROOT NOTE // 114 Fourth St. S. Jazz jam • 8:30 p.m.

POPCORN TAVERN // 308 S. Fourth St. TBA (Tell Brownie About it) • 10 p.m.

THE ROOT NOTE // 114 4th St. S. Open Mic • 8 p.m.

THE STARLITE LOUNGE // 222 Pearl St. Kies and Kompanie (jazz) • 5 p.m.

VALHALLA HALL (UW-L) // 1725 State St. InPulse (a capella) • 7 p.m.

MISCELLANY

12// April 8, 2010

Sudoku

Answers below

The Universe and Other Small Things

By Ralph Winrich Special to Second Supper

ENJOY YOUR SUPPER ONLINE AT www.secondsupper.com

Lets face it; we live in a time of change.

Nothing new there, but change occurs faster now then ever before. Not just change in our lives, but in how we perceive things. Take the Solar System.

In the good old days, everything was neat and orderly. The stars stayed where they belonged and the planets moved in predictable paths; all six of 'em. Predictable yes, understandable no. But no one seemed bent out of shape over it. After all there were more pressing issues to deal with, like survival, who would be king or will there be war.

But along came the invention of the telescope and sooner or later someone had to look up instead of out, and, well, change came fast in the night sky. It wasn’t long before the Sun, not the Earth, was proved to be at the center, which came as a blow to our fragile egos. Then a few centuries later another planet was discovered and a few years later another. Things were getting complicated. But few people took notice, as there were more pressing issues to deal with, like keeping up with the neighbors or will there be war.

Have an opinion?

Send your letters to the editor to Second Supper, 614 Main St., La Crosse, WI 54601 or by e-mail to editor@secondsupper.com.

Letters should be signed and include phone number for verification purposes.

Please limit letters to no more than 300 words. Second Supper reserves the right to edit letters for length, clarity and grammar. For more information, call (608) 782-7001.

Reminds you to support the retailers, restaurants, taverns and bands that support us. We are funded solely by advertising so if you want to support us, support them!

CONSCIENTIOUS COMMERCE: Word

The telescope showed us far orbiting worlds named Uranus and Neptune, as well as numerous little worlds orbiting between Mars and Jupiter with too many strange names to keep track of. Except for the occasional small world labeled as a group “asteroids,” things held their place and we seemed to have a good handle on it. But in 1930 things changed again as another far-out wanderer was discovered and named. The planet Pluto joined our happy family.

Now this is where science becomes interesting. Science is supposed to be a process that follows specific rules and procedures of order. In other words, no politics. But politics is always in the background. The politics of getting grant money is one example. Another example that many, for some reason, now identify with relates to Pluto.

For some reason Pluto is a favorite among younger people. Maybe it’s the cute name, or maybe the fact we know so little about the place; after all, the less you know, the more mysterious something becomes.

But just a few years ago the astronomical community, in the form of something called IAU or International Astronomical Union, voted Pluto off the island, demoted it to the status of “Dwarf Planet,” then added several other objects to keep it company. The new official designation is minor planet number 134340, which just doesn’t roll off the tongue, does it?

Poor Pluto. This far-out world takes more than 249 earth years just to make one trip around the sun. It’s a place where spring doesn’t exist, let alone summer. Some people would argue this point, stressing that in its orbit Pluto at times is inside the orbit of Neptune and warms up enough to allow its atmosphere to show up. The rest of its long year this appears to remain frozen, laying around like so much snow. If this is your idea of spring you must love what we have here!

Slowly astronomers have made some discoveries about Pluto, like the fact it now has three moons. But not much else is known. This will change. In 2006 a mission to Pluto was launched. It lifted off while Pluto was still a planet. In 2015 it will fly by Pluto and for a brief moment take numerous measurements and photos. The flyby will take less than 60 minutes after a journey of nine years. It won’t save the planet status of Pluto, but it will remove some of the mystery.

So we can again go back to more pressing matters, like survival, who will be president or will there be war.

Second Supper

Oh hi, right now I am listening to Harry Smith's Anthology of American Folk Music. Let's get right into this one, folks. Harry Smith was this total freak show of a human who was born in 1923 in Portland, Oregon.

His parents were practicing members of an occult society, his mother taught on a reservation where Harry was introduced to shamanic experiences at an early age, and Harry spent his teenage years making field recordings of various shamanic ceremonies.

He went on to study anthropology at the University of Washington before drifting down to Berkeley where he got turned on to reefer and the proto-beatnik bohemian elite. He started doing abstract paintings, made weird animated films, and was amassing one of the most amazing 78 rpm record collections of under-appreciated music from the post-war south. Smith ditched the West Coast in 1951 after being lured to Manhattan under the patronage of a Baroness from the Guggenheim. He was soon broke, however, and went to Moses Asch, founder of Folkways Records, to sell his collection of "hillbilly" and "race" 78s he'd been collecting. Asch agreed to buy them, but only if Smith would compile a series for Folkways to release. Smith put together a six-record set of songs from 1926-32 that became a watershed moment in music, hugely influencing the hep cats of the era, including a young Bob Dylan and Jerry Garcia. Dylan has characterized the collection as "traditional music...based on hexagrams. It comes about from legends, bibles, plagues, and it revolves around vegetables and death." It brought forgotten blues musicians such as Mississippi John Hurt and Blind Lemon Jefferson and country musicians such as The Carter Family and Clarence Ashley to a new generation and shaped a lot of the music of the '60s underground and blues revival. Meanwhile, Smith himself became a fixture of the NYC psychedelic boho scene, continued making short films, performed magic, and reportedly was one smelly individual. He was constantly trading his art for food, shelter and to fund his parasitic and dissolute life of drug addled squalor. Yet he was lionized by the hippest of the hip. He died of cardiac arrest in 1991 in a Chelsea Hotel room he'd been staying at for decades. In a 2006 documentary of his work called The Old, Weird America, performers such as Beck, Lou Reed, Nick Cave, Elvis Costello, Steve Earle, Emmylou Harris, Allen Ginsberg and Philip Glass all wax poetics about this strange mole of a man whose bizarre interests helped shape America's counter-culture.

The new generation of crusty string band street performers and yuppified O Brother Where Are Thou fans are all in Smith's debt.

— Shuggypop Jackson

Second Supper

The Best Food & Drink Specials in Town LOCATION

April 8, 2010 // 13

YOUR GUIDE TO CONSUMPTION

SUNDAY

To advertise here, call (608) 782-7001 or e-mail us at advertising@secondsupper.com.

MONDAY

TUESDAY

WEDNESDAY

THURSDAY

FRIDAY

SATURDAY

ARENA

Midwest Poker League 7 p.m.

Closed

Wyld Wednesday: $2 Jumbo UV, mixers $1.50 Coronas

Ladies' Night, $5 Long Island pitchers

$1 Cherry Bombs, $1 Keystone Light silos

$1 Cherry Bombs, $1 Keystone Light silos

BODEGA BREW PUB

$2 BBQ Pork Sliders

2-Fers, Buy any regularly priced food item and get one of equal or lesser value for free

$2.50 Coors vs. Keystone pitchers. All specials 9 p.m. to close

AUC2D: $5, domestic taps, rail mix- 10-cent wings, $1 Miller High Life ers, Long Islands. All specials 9 p.m. bottles, $1.50 rail mixers; $2.50 call to close drinks. All specials 9 p.m. to close.

107 3rd St. S. 782-1883 122 4th St. 782-0677

BROTHERS

Closed

306 Pearl St. 784-0522

FEATURES

Free beer 5:30-6:30; Free wings 7:30- Taco buffet 11-2; 8:30, Free bowling after 9 $1 Pabst bottles and $1 bowling after 9

W3923 State Highway 16 786-9000

HOWIE’S

Fish Tacos: 1 / $2.50, 2 / $5.00, 3 / $6.50.

AUC2D: $5, domestic taps, rail mixers and Long Islands. Wristband Night: $2.50 SoCo & Jack. All specials 9 p.m. to close.

$3 3 Olives mixers, $3 Mojitos, $2 $3 Bacardi mixers, $3 Mojitos, $2 Cherry Bombs, $1 Bazooka Joe's; Cherry bombs, $1 Bazooka Joe's.

FAC: $3 domestic pitchers, micro/ All specials 9 p.m. to close. import taps, anything that pours.

4-9 p.m.

All you care to eat pizza buffet, 11-2

All you care to eat fish fry 4-10; un- Prime rib dinner 4-10; limited Glow-N-Bowl $9.99 unlimited Glow-N-Bowl $9.99

1125 La Crosse St. 784-7400

Happy hour 4 to 9 p.m.; 9 p.m. to 9 p.m. to close: $3.50 domestic 9 p.m. to close: $1 rails, $2.50 pitch- $5 all you can drink close: Night Before Class - $3 pitch- pitchers ers, beer pong ers of the beast

9 p.m. to close: $1.25 rails, $1.75 bottles/cans

9 p.m. to close: $2 Captain mixers, $2 bottles/cans, $3 Jager bombs

IMPULSE

Closed

Closed

Karaoke 9 p.m.-Close; Happy Hour daily 5-8

Wine & martini night; Happy Hour daily 5-8

18+ night (1st and 3rd Thursday of each month); Happy Hour daily 5-8

$25 open bar package, 11 p.m. to Happy Hour daily 5-8 close: domestic/import beer, rail, call drinks, martinis; Happy Hour daily 5-8

JB’S SPEAKEASY

$1.75 domestic bottles

SIN Night

$1.75 domestic bottles

Happy Hour 5 to 7 p.m.

Happy Hour 5 to 7 p.m.

Happy Hour 5 to 7 p.m.

TJ's Oasis 620 Gillette St., 3 p.m.

Howie's 1128 La Crosse St., 7 p.m.

Arena 620 107 S. 3rd St. 7 p.m.

The Commodore 215 S. Chestnut St., 6 p.m.

Dewey's Side Street Pub 621 St. Paul St., 6 p.m.

Sloopy's Alma Mater 163 Copeland Ave., 7 p.m.

Days Hotel 101 Sky Harbor Drive, 7 p.m.

Adams Street Pub 1200 11th St. S., 6:30 p.m.

Ike's Jabber Jaws 433 Avon St., 6 p.m.

$6.95 lunch buffet $9.95 breakfast buffet 10 a.m. to 2 p.m.

BBQ sandwich

Tacos

Chili dogs

Tacos

$2 can beer (2-6 p.m.) $11 buckets of beers (6-close)

$2 can beer (2-6 p.m.)

12" pizza: $8.99 up to 5 toppings (4-close)

Wings, Wings, Wings... $2 off 14: Ladies night, 2 for 1 drinks (6-close), Friday Fish, $2 can beer (2-6) pizza, $2 can beer (2-6 p.m.) $2 can beer (2-6 p.m.)

2 for 1 pints/pitches w/ student ID over 21

Buck Burgers

Tacos $1.25

15-cent wings

$8.99 12-ounce T-bone

15-cent wings

$1.50 taps 6 to 8 p.m.

All Mojitos $5

214 Main St. 782-6010

9 p.m. to close: $2 Bacardi mixers, $2 domestic pints, $1.50 shots blackberry brandy

Happy Hour 5 to 7 p.m.

717 Rose St. 796-1161

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THE LIBRARY

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123 3rd St. 784-8020

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$3 Jumbo Long Island Iced Teas, $3 3 Olives mixers $5 Miller/Bud Light Pitchers, $2.25 Leinies Bottles (7-1AM)

137 4th St. 782-6622

$5 Pitchers/$2 bottles of Miller $1.75 Miller/Bud Light Taps, $2.25 $1.75 Rails, $1.50 Domestic Taps, $2 domestic bottles, $2.50 Skyy/ products (11-4pm) MIcro/Craft Taps, $2.50 Cherry Bombs $3.50 Jager Bombs Absolut mixers, $2 Dr. shots $2 Corona Bottles, $2 Kilo Kai Mixers (7-1AM) (7-1AM) (7-1am) , $3 Bloodys (7-1AM)

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Ask for great eats

11 a.m. to 3 p.m., Barn burner $7.95; 4 to 9 p.m., Hobo dinner (serves two) $30.95

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Happy Hour until 10 p.m. $1.50 domestic taps, $2 rails from 10 to close

601 St. Andrew St. 781-0005 126 3rd St. N. 782-9467

$1 taps of PBR, $1 rails

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$3 call doubles, $2 Bud products

Ladies' Night: $2 top shelf, $1 Pink $8.50 Fish Bowls, $2 Miller products $1 off Three Olives, $2 domestic taps Tacos Everyone: $2.50 bombs, $2 taps, $3 Jack/Captain doubles

14// April 8, 2010

Maze Efflux

Second Supper

CONSUMPTION 1, 2, 3, 4 You know the rest?

By Erich Boldt

By Matt Jones

The Beer Review Dead Guy Rogue Brewery Newport, Oregon

This week I end my mini binge of Maibocks with what may be the most popular — and least recognized — Maibock in the country, Rogue Dead Guy. Although this is a true juggernaut in the craft beer world, most people are surprised to learn its heritage. I know I was shocked. From the first time I ever tried a Dead Guy (in a campground outside Portland, Ore., August 2006) until I started doing my Maibock research last month, I just figured Dead Guy was a quality West Coast ale. It has lots of crisp hop notes and little of the maltiness associated with bocks, and it certainly doesn’t say “Maibock” anywhere on the label. But sure enough, a poke around the Rogue Web site shows this beer to be brewed “in the style of a German Maibock,” but fermented with the brewery’s famed “PacMan” ale yeast. This creates a smooth-sipping brew with the clean finish of an ale. No wonder Dead Guy is the go-to beer of the West Coast and a reliable fall-

back for connoisseurs everywhere else. But the question for La Crosse beer drinkers is this: Is Dead Guy worth $10 for a six-pack?

The beer pours a murky golden amber color with a frothy off-white head that maintains decent retention. Compared to the traditional style, the Dead Guy looks like a watered down Appearance: 7 Maibock, but it’s Aroma: 8 the aroma that truly pushes this beer forTaste: 8 ward. Here, you get a delightful blend of Mouthfeel: 7 caramel malts, some piney hops and faint Drinkability: 7 whiffs of what might be kiwi. In decidedly un-bock fashion, the Total: 37 flavor comes on with all hops. It hits the tongue assertively, puckers the lips and then slides through the mouth with warming malts. Slowly, the caramel sweetness and biscuity body seep in. It turns earthy at the finish and goes down smooth, but the mouth is left with a distinctly bitter aftertaste. Truly, this is a Maibock like no other.

It’s still a great beer that’s pretty drinkable (especially considering the 6.5 percent ABV), and beer styles are merely labels anyway, so props to Dead Guy for being so original. Is it worth the ten bucks? Of course it is, you cheapskate. We’re talking about craft beer here, not sandwiches.

— Adam Bissen

ACROSS 1 Cruel stuff 7 Rat 11 It creates a big bang 14 Keys on the piano?

15 Nobelist Wiesel 16 "Ni ___, Kai-Lan" (Nickelodeon cartoon) 17 "...what are we ___?" (from a protest chant) 19 Actress Mendes 20 Stimpy's smarter half 21 Villainous look 22 Assassinated Egyptian 24 Singer DiFranco and namesakes 26 "...tell me that you ___" (from a Feist song) 28 Full of prickles 30 Friend of Pooh 31 "___ Without a Face" (Billy Idol song) 32 "___! The Genetic Opera" 35 Scotts Miracle-___

36 "...I declare ___" (from a kids' game) 39 650, to Nero 41 Heavy burden 42 Lockup, in Liverpool 45 Place to catch a play in Italy 47 It's put up for celebrations 49 "...get your woman ___" (from a Coolio dance song) 53 "And here it is!"

54 Harding in 1990s tabloids 55 Like some mothers 57 King theorized to have died from malaria 58 Letter in frat names 59 "...I love the ___" (from "Full Metal Jacket") 62 Good name 63 Of grand proportions 64 Cheesy chip 65 AMA members

Answers to April 1 puzzle Freefillin;:Take the plunge into random vocabulary

66 "___, Where's My Car?" 67 Attach, in a way DOWN 1 "Everything Is Illuminated" author Jonathan ___ Foer 2 Property transfer recipient 3 It can't be taken away, in "The Greatest Love of All" 4 "___ bin ein Berliner" 5 Takes a breather 6 For the most part 7 Israeli desert 8 Woodard of "Desperate Housewives" 9 2016 Olympics setting 10 Olympic heptathlete Jackie Joyner-___ 11 It's shown when kicking someone out 12 Jane's Addiction guitarist Dave 13 Precisely 18 Prefix for classicist 23 "The Queen of Christian Pop" 25 Under the radar 27 "Scratch my head!" to a cat 29 WWII naval vessel

32 Bleed, like dye 33 Aussie bird 34 Network for Ken Burns documentaries 37 Donkey feature 38 Turkish title 39 Stood for 40 Little snoozes 43 Vacationing 44 Resulted in 45 In full duration, like a pregnancy 46 Reprimanded, with "out" 47 Makes babies 48 Squeals, as with a perp 50 Sensational and shocking 51 In reserve 52 Have power over 56 Insecticide once hawked by Muhammad Ali 60 TV's Nahasapeemapetilon 61 "...man ___ mouse?"

For answers, call (900) 226-2800, 99 cents per minute. Or to bill to a credit card, call (800) 655-6549. Reference puzzle #0462.

AVAILABLE ONLY ONLINE • Best of La Crosse ballot • Review of 'Clash of the Titans' www.secondsupper.com

Second Supper

April 8, 2010 // 15

THE LAST WORD

Y Marks the Spot

By Brett Emerson brett.emerson@secondsupper.com

Nowadays, you really don’t need to have read a single poem to loathe the majority of poetry. Today’s horrible laureates, more often than not, peddle their wares through music. Any time you find yourself in a public place, odds are that your ears are being used as a chamber pot for thousands of obnoxious sentiments without your being aware of it. As I’m certainly one of these exposed people — and because I’m not bad at putting the occasional sets of rhymes and lines together — I tend to pick up on the idiocy that passes for popular lyricism, and have a ready supply of hate for music at large.

As such, much of the following list of my gripes against poetry didn’t spring out of my being brought in to help judge the Second Supper’s poetry contest, but I definitely brought my prejudices to the table in

reading all submissions.

In poetry, it’s irrelevant to me what one writes about, or how something is written, so long as it’s thoughtful, honest, and well crafted in some way. Yet there is something to be said for playing the odds, for knowing when a poem is likely to be terrible. Consider these few ideas that aid my calculations:

• For the love of God, never, ever get down on your knees. You will inevitably begin begging someone, “Please!” And you will become another huge poetic pussy.

• Leave the canned and contrived anguish in your diary. Actually, no. Take it out of there as well. The walls are closing in.

There are voices in your head. Whatever.

Like all clichés, these ones are easy to default to and don’t have anything to say. How about explaining what put you in dark straits and making your sentiments actually mean something?

• Some of the world’s worst poetry comes from its writers being fixated on rhyme. Going back to the last point, the voices in my brain are driving me insane. Additionally, if you have time to lean, you have time to clean. Placing two similar-sounding words at the end of adjacent lines does not grant one the privilege of ignoring rhythm, content or style.

• Then again, there are all sorts of atonal clots of prose trying to pass for poetry as well. A series of sentences contorted into lines of poetry doesn’t a poem make; it’s a

paragraph written by someone who doesn’t know when to use the Enter key. Even worse is the avant-garde school of poetry that wastes entire pages in stuttering out one/ goddamn/sentence.

• It’s usually a bad idea to write poetry about the people you’re dating, or the people you want to date. This is what’s popularly known as the “Axl Rose putting his girlfriend in a Guns N’ Roses music video” rule.

Love poems are best written in hindsight, rather than with the needy and impulsive lust of the present tense. The latter usually ends in embarrassment later on. If you’ve been married for longer than 20 years, feel free to ignore this rule.

• Parenthetical asides often derail the flow of poetry (he said, chewing on the nub of a red plastic brush, staring at the blue wristband which betrayed a weekend of shame). I’d say that a good rule is that you get one set of parentheses per poem, and even then you’d better think twice about using it.

• Not all poetry is meant to be read aloud. Not every poem is a song.

• In this vein, writing a sonnet doesn’t make one Shakespeare. Which is to say, mastery of formula is no indicator of talent.

• Furthermore, writing in Renaissance Fair High Style is a sure way to make your audience blink out. Thees and Thous and Doths and Verilies seem to be old favorites of that stripe of poet who uses language

to conceal a shortage of ideas. If speaking Ren makes sense within the context of the poem (or the audience), go for it. If a poet is doing it because it sounds impressive, the work will be seen as the pretentious drivel it is.

• Metaphors and ambiguity are typical tools of poets, but excessive vagueness renders a work pointless. If you’re going to write a poem that’s so encrypted that only you can understand it, what’s the point of taking it out of your head?

• Here’s a big one: Don’t be Bob Dylan.

Really, don’t write like anyone you admire.

Your influences ought to be tools, not templates.

• Also, don’t be Charles Bukowski. The secret behind the endurance of Bukowski’s writings isn’t that he swore his head off, got drunk a lot, and fell down many flights of stairs. It’s because the guy had heart beneath all his foulness. Acting vulgar for the sake of acting vulgar — or to shock the squares — will only get a person so far. It’s the spirit behind the nastiness that gives it force or impotence. The fact that you can swear or write about bodily secretions really impresses very few people over a certain age.

To really get under their skin or inside their heads requires more effort.

• A great poet can ignore and break all the rules of poetry.

• Never assume you are a great poet. If you are, you'll be.

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$2.00 - 1 Player, $3.00 - 2 Players 50 Cents Off Drinks, $1 Off Pitchers

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THURSDAY FRIDAY 5 Domestic Bottles 4 $10 $5 Micro/Import Bottles $11.50, $7 Micro/Craft Pitchers (7-1am)

$5 Miller Lite/Bud Light Pitchers

SATURDAY $2.25 Leinies Bottles (7-1am)

$2 Captain Mixers $2 Long Islands $3 Effen Vodka Mixers (7-1am)

16// April 8, 2010

Second Supper

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