2012 05 03

Real Estate Section Launches Page 10

Around About in Photos Pages 16 & 22

Harry Hay Exhibit Page 15

The LGBTQ Newspaper and Events Calendar for the San Francisco Bay Area | July 28 2011 www.sfbaytimes.com

/SanFranciscoBayTimes

May 3-16, 2012 | www.sfbaytimes.com

DOMA Continues to Threaten LGBTQ Military Families IM AGE SOURCE | DON K EY HOT EY C REAT IVE C OM M ON S

SOURCE: N ATION AL CEN TER F OR L ESBIAN RIGHTS / P HOTO BY T RISH T UN N EY

NCLR Celebrates 35 Years

/SFBayTimes

House Speaker John Boehner seeking support for DOMA

By Dennis McMillan NCLR Executive Director Kate Kendell (r) with entertainers Kate Clinton and Jane Lynch

This Saturday, the National Center for Lesbian Rights celebrates its 35th anniversary. In honor of that milestone and the organization’s decades of tireless support for our community, the Bay Times is presenting this special commemorative issue.

NCLR was founded in 1977, when the brave and determined Donna Hitchens, fresh out of law school, wanted to make a positive difference. As a legal scholar, she saw the courtroom as a way to change the world. As a lesbian, she had experienced frustrations and

fears—both personal and professional—and didn’t want others to suffer the same. And as a future parent, she knew she would face even more challenges ahead.

the trial and appellate court levels. At present, more than 5000 lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people and their families across the nation are receiving NCLR’s help, with the impact of litigation serving all LGBTQ people in the United States.

Her inspired vision thankfully became a reality. With additional leadership provided by talented women such as Roberta Achtenberg and current executive director Kate Kendell, NCLR has grown to become one of the world’s most inf luential public interest law firms that litigates precedent setting LGBTQ-related cases at

There will be much to applaud this Saturday at the 2012 Anniversary Celebration at San Francisco’s City View at Metreon. There, NCLR will honor seven heroes. Actress Jane Lynch will receive the Vanguard Award in recognition of exemplifying

NCLR’s vision and values of equality and justice for all. Six students from Minnesota’s Anoka-Hennepin School District will receive the Courage Award. The students displayed bravery in standing up against a policy that prohibits staff from discussing LGBTQ issues, prevents staff from effectively addressing bullying, and has created a hostile environment for students who are or are perceived to be LGBTQ or gender non-conforming.

“This year is especially significant, as NCLR celebrates a major mile(continued on page 8)

PHOTO SOUR CE: WIKIP EDI A

PHOTO SOUR CE: WIKIP EDI A

Have You Been to Macondray Lane?

Armistead Maupin and his husband Chris Turner

Armistead Maupin’s dreamy, magical Tales of the City novels and other memorable works weave such a compelling spell that their resonance never fails to captivate. Who, for example, can stroll down Russian Hill’s Macondray Lane without thinking happily of its fictional twin, Barbary Lane?

The wooded enclave in the heart of the city extends a few blocks east and west between Leavenworth and Taylor streets. One can still imagine characters such as Mouse and Anna Madrigal still inhabiting that beautiful area, sensuality sizzling beneath the fog-kissed tranquility.

Maupin continues to live in San Francisco, and will celebrate his birthday on May 13. His life, like one of his books, is full of intriguing twists and plot turns. Born in Washington, D.C. but raised in Raleigh, North Carolina, Maupin worked at WRAL-TV in Raleigh at a station then managed by future U.S. Senator Jesse Helms. The two had a cordial relationship, with Helms even nominating Maupin for a patriotic award, which he won. Of Helms, however, Maupin later said, “I’ve changed and he hasn’t.”

Macondray Lane on Russian Hill inspired the fictional location known as Barbary Lane.

Maupin served as a naval off icer in the Mediterranean and with the River Patrol Force in Vietnam. He worked as a reporter for a newspaper in Charleston, South Carolina, before our lucky break: He was assigned to the SF bureau of the Associated Press in 1971, fell in love with the city, and we have blissfully had him ever since.

In 1974, the San Francisco edition of the Pacific Sun published Maupin’s first weekly installment of “The Serial.” Those of us who read it, and later in the Chronicle as Tales of the City, were absolutely transfixed. Like Bar-

bary Lane, the serial was based on real people and places. The stories featured the adventures of Mary Ann Singleton and a gay man, Michael Huxtable (later to become Michael Tolliver), whom she met at the Marina Safeway.

Tales later inspired three groundbreaking television miniseries. Most recently, it was brought to life on stage as a musical, with all projects receiving rave reviews. Maupin, whose husband is Christopher Turner, continues to do public readings of his own (continued on page 8

Servicemembers Legal Defense Network (SLDN) on May Day fired back at Speaker of the House John Boehner (R-OH) and his Bipartisan Legal Advisory Group (BLAG) for their request to intervene in McLaughlin v.

U.S., the landmark federal court case filed in October 2011 by eight married gay and lesbian service members and veterans who are represented by SLDN and Chadbourne & Parke.

The case challenges the constitutionality of the so-called Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) and three other federal statutes - Titles 10, 32, and 38 - that preclude the military from providing equal recognition, support and benefits for all military families. The Department of Justice announced its intention related to the case in a letter sent to Boehner on February 17, 2012, triggering the BLAG to make known its position.

“Speaker Boehner’s request to defend this case in the wake of the ongoing harm done to military families by these discriminatory laws is reprehensible and callous,” said Army veteran and SLDN Executive Director Aubrey Sarvis. “The Speaker has turned a deaf ear to the urgent pleas of CW2 Charlie Morgan and countless families like hers, who are living with the day-to-day realities of a military that has been forced to create two classes of service members.”

In February, Chief Warrant Officer (CW2) Morgan, a member of the New Hampshire National Guard and a plaintiff in McLaughlin v. U.S. - who also is battling incurable stage IV breast cancer - traveled to Washington, DC to tell her story on Capitol Hill and ask Boehner not to intervene in the case.

“Should I not survive this bout with cancer, my wife Karen will not receive any survivor’s benefits, social security benefits or health insurance coverage,” Morgan said. “Karen is (continued on page 9

Sex, History & Lesbian Outlaws The following is an edited excerpt of an interview of Jeanne Cordova by Margie Adam that took place on April 29, 2012 at the Montclair Women’s Cultural Arts Club in Oakland. Barbara Price hosted the event, which marked the San Francisco Bay Area launch of Cordova’s new book, When We Were Outlaws, A Memoir of Love & Revolution.

During the time you describe - roughly 1970-1976 - you were busy doing many things - sometimes all at once, sometimes one after another. You were president of the LA chapter of Daughters of Bilitis, you were publisher and editor in Chief of The Lesbian Tide, also a staff member at the Los Angeles Gay Community Services Center, and reporter for the LA Free Press and you were one of the principal organizers of the National Lesbian Conference in 1973. Oh, and in your spare time you produced my very first solo concert in LA. I was the musical entertainment part of a Tide fundraiser you did with Jill Johnston who had just published Lesbian Nation.

Women’s Music has been described as the soundtrack of the feminist movement’s entertainment after a hard day’s politics. Where do you come down? What role did women’s music play in your political and personal life during this time?

Jeanne: I should be honest and say, especially when it first started in 1973, women’s music played no role in my personal or political life! I sort of…didn’t like it…and saw it as an interruption to the radical & political, true and critical focus on politics—street demos, civil disobedience, etc.

I’m sure this is because as a child & teenager I was in a house filled with 14 people trying to get along. My mother would always yell, “Turn that damn thing off!” when one of us would turn on the radio. She saw it as needless confusion to the business of life.

This in my house was in fact “business” –construction, building buildings, blueprints.

At 19, in the convent, I was sent to Watts and a bit later into the anti-war street demos. This was my introduction to any kind of music! So I began by listening to the lyrics of Joan Baez & Bob Dylan. And they were political lyrics, so I began to see a role for music—as long as it was political.

At first, as publisher of The Lesbian Tide, I objected to all the attention lesbian feminists were paying to what I saw as “the drivel of entertainment.” We were supposed to be having a revolution.

If music came in anywhere, it should be AFTER the revolution.

But my role as publisher of a big lesbian feminist newsmagazine forced me to start covering these musician types (tease Margie). I remember literally watching in my head, the avalanche of popularity sweep into the lesbian feminist movement! Women’s music quickly topped the charts. Our readers couldn’t get enough of these people and their concerts!

So years passed, and it was only in 1973 when I met and spent a few months living with Margie Adam, and started listening to her lyrics, watching her hour after hour at the piano that I felt personally, the healing power of music and for the first time, melodies.

That’s when I became a convert to women’s music.

So I, shamelessly, as a politico, began to use it, produce it, and bring it into political events I organized! And in my book Outlaws, music, especially that of Joan Baez, Margie, and Carole King, plays a large role.

Margie: You were also engaged in a passionate exploration of non-monogamy, the radical feminist theory and personal practice - in intense love relationships with other lesbians who took their autonomy and self-respect just as seriously as you did. At the same time you were clarifying your butch self in the midst of relentless pressure from lesbian feminists to move away from the either-or butch-femme identities toward androgyny.

Two different and vast subjects of interest - both connected to radical feminist theory. How have your thoughts and feelings evolved since the time in which the memoir is set - the midseventies? Are you married? Are you monogamous?

Jeanne: I’m domesticated --with a life partner for two decades, but I am not theoretically, monogamous. I do still believe that non-monogamy, or as we say today, polyamory, is the most natural state for lesbians. But I can’t seem to find a femme that agrees with me! Including the one I’m domesticated to. I don’t know how she feels politically because the mere mention of this topic never gets to a conversational level in our house. But personally, she doesn’t agree with me.

Seriously though, my views on this issue have not changed much since the early years of feminism, but I have seen that many queer dykes today, both the boomer generation and on down to Millennials, have continued to invent similar styles of living, such as polyamory. So while I’m here in the capital of polyamory, I’d like to point to it and non-monogamy as being very similar. So I would like to pose this question to all those here and elsewhere: What is it about being a lesbian that seems to require that we keep re-inventing new forms of being beyond the gender bi2 BAY TIMES MAY 3, 2012

P HOTO C OURT ESY OF J EAN N E C ORDOVA

Margie: Jeanne Córdova’s memoir When We Were Outlaws takes place at a moment of great transition within the progressive movement in America at the end of the Vietnam War era. A huge national anti-war mobilization had given birth to more hope and more energy among women and gay and lesbian people. This is the backdrop for Jeanne’s award-winning lesbian feminist memoir, When We Were Outlaws.

Jeanne Cordova with Margie Adam and Barbara Price at Montclair Women’s Clutural Arts Club

nary and new forms of relationships beyond the heteronormative dyadic pair?

Margie: It may be hard for some to believe today but back in the day, when The Tide put a photo of two women kissing on the cover, the printer refused to print it. When I read that it reminded me of experiences I had in women’s music where 1. people refused to rent a building to us for a concert 2. they refused to rent pianos, sound equipment 3. printers refused to print posters/programs with the word “lesbian” included.

Tell us the story of how you managed the printer...

Jeanne: Yes, there were many forms of censorship back in the day. When I found myself caught in a room with an old, white, cigar smoking, web-press printer, with that issue of The Lesbian Tide below me on a silent press—I had to rely on my butch background. I told him, “I can give you tips for how to get a girl into bed, if you roll that press for as long as we talk.”

Margie: The Centerpiece of When We Were Outlaws is the story of the struggle you and other lesbian feminists had with the LA GCSC Struggle to include and incorporate lesbians into all levels of the leadership and services of the center. It was fundamentally a struggle between feminism and gay male liberation. Coming to terms with the contradictions inherent in the two movements - one a movement for sexual freedom, the other about replacing male order of hierarchical relationships and creating equalitarian structures of shared power.

Would you say these contradictions have resolved themselves?

Jeanne: To a great extent, yes. But not in a way we outlaws might have hoped. In 1976, the Gay Movement stopped being a struggle for sexual liberation and evolved, or devolved, into a struggle for gay rights. Secondly—also in the late 1970s— radical feminism ceased to control the agenda of the Women’s Liberation movement. Liberal feminism took over. The truly radical/ systemic notion of changing the power structure of the patriarchy gave way to a clearer and perhaps more immediate, quest for civil rights in fighting for laws against rape, employment discrimination, domestic violence, sexual harassment, and for the ERA. Choosing the concept of gay civil rights was a more pragmatic and sexier way to sell our movement to heteronormative society.

But we did sell out our radical underpinnings. And I was left with the realization that ALL movements start with radical ideology, but unless they have a real blood—born revolution, like a socialist-styled coup—all movements must adopt a civil rights and assimilationism stance.

Margie: You came to a very clear-eyed and devastating conclusion at the end of your involvement in the GCSC Struggle. Would you read those sentences?

Jeanne: “Dykes stood on thin ice, I realized, in both the gay men’s and women’s movements, trying to negotiate power with no leverage. The women’s movement thought Lesbian Nation was part of the gay movement and gay male leaders sought to palm dykes off onto the women’s movement.”

“Given this conclusion…I had to ask myself; what’s a dyke to do?

Like Del Martin said in her famous essay five years prior to my conclusion, I was ready to leave working within the Gay Male Movement. Martin put my feelings beautifully in Goodbye, My Alienated Brothers when she said, “Goodbye to the male homophile community. Gay is good, but not good enough…goodbye to your old ideas and old values in a time that calls for radical change.

Goodbye to the wasteful, meaningless verbiage of empty resolutions made by hollow men of self-proclaimed privilege…I will

not be your nigger any longer. Nor was I ever your mother. I must go where the action is… to find acceptance, equality, love and friendship… (to) the women’s movement.”

But five years later, in 1975—the year in the book—I’d also fought the long/bitter battle that I talk about in my next book—of pleading with N.O.W. to recognize that lesbianism was a feminist issue. So, I realized Del’s decision couldn’t be mine. I could NOT resolve my activist life by simply leaving the gay male movement and switching to the Feminist Movement.

No, I urgently believed that the answer was to build an Independent Lesbian Movement on a national scale. I became what I called a lesbian primacist. If someone were to look back over the purposeful trail of my political activity and journalism over the last 35 years, you’d see I’ve always been pursuing the building of a lesbian counter-culture and the politics, not of separatism, but of primacy - called Lesbian Nation.

I adopted the politics of separatism on a personal --but never on a political level. As a politico I believed that lesbians had to make coalitions with gay men, with women’s, black, brown, anti-war movements.

But I believed that to be a good solider, you have to go to boot camp—to get the fundamentals, values, goals. And I think that boot camp is lesbian separatism.

Another question I’d like to post would be: Is separatism still viable or necessary in any other role than the boot camp concept I’ve suggested? Is lesbian separatism relevant today?

Margie: Do you think feminism and separatism are compatible?

Jeanne: A truly feminist reconstructed world would erase the need for separatism, so to this extent the two are not compatible.

But without separatism, it is hard to understand, much less fall in love with, the ideology or memory of a truly feminist world.

Emotionally I am inclined to agree with Jill Johnston, who said that the feminist solution is Lesbian Nation. That feminism is the theory and lesbian feminism is the practice. But this is a utopian belief and, as a politico, I’m a pragmatic fighter. So, periodically I drive myself to the gas station—the garden of separatism—and fill up on why I am in this fight to begin with.

Separatism remains alive in many pockets of the world … and still serves the purpose us, as Monique Witting featured so visually in Les Guérillères, of reminding us what we are fighting for.

Margie: Let’s talk a bit about lesbian identity vs. coalition politics. You and I have witnessed a long struggle to include other sexual identities in our civil rights title. Gay gave way to Gay-L esbia n, t hen Gay-L esbia n-Bisexua l, then Gay-Lesbian-Bisexual-Transgendered - and more recently, Gay-Lesbian-Bisexual-Intersex-Queer-and Questioning. LGBTIQQ. Today many people simply say LGBT to describe our community. Others sum up our complexity with one word: queer.

W hat’s you take on what “queer” means today? Do you identify with the word?

Jea n ne: I n 1999, l i ke ever yone over for t y, I hated t he word “queer.”

By 2007, I thought, oh, it’s a catch all, too many letters, l i ke a lphabet soup. T hen, I bega n to under st a nd what Queer Politics was all about—its issues, like that the Patriarchy is still our enemy but somehow it’s no longer f illed with men or masculinity...and that gender is completely f luid, and that feminism was all B.S. because it was mostly led by upper middle class white intellectual women. But don’t we all realize, that it’s always the intelligentia that

initiates social change –if only because they didn’t have

we once didn’t believe in, or how desperately we want to

to work for a living —people like Lenin & Trotsky, Martin

join the patriarchal institution called marriage -- that not

Luther and Malcolm X were all middle & upper middle

even straight people want anymore, or how the best answer

class intellectuals.

is to tell our high school sons/daughters, “It gets better--just wait.”

By 2010, having worked with a younger generation these last 5 yea r s, I had lea r ned t hat t he Q word was much

“Just wait” br ings us full circle back to the 1940’s. Just

more than a summation. At a butch conference in L A—I

wait is what made Del Martin leave the homophile move-

stated from the podium, after Carmen Vasquez’s speech on

ment whose prayer to their members was also, “Just wait, it

“Butch as a Feminist Identity”:

gets better.” But I’m an outlaw and a “queer,” so I am not into “waiting.” “Just wait—at age of 5 when I wanted to be

“ I don’t k now what a ny of you have lea r ned over t h is historic weekend, but I want to announce that what I’ve learned makes me publically want to say that I am leaving the gay & lesbian movement, as of this moment, renewing my vow to keep f ighting, but now under the banner of the Queer Movement.”

What is the Queer Movement? As Judith Butler, its primary theorist says, “In the context of Western identity politics, the term also acts as a label setting queer-identifying people apart from discourse, ideologies, and lifestyles that

a Jesuit…told to “ just wait”…

Margie: For some women, this summary terminolog y, in initials or a single word, is problematical because it feels as though, once again, “lesbian” identity is being submerged or disappeared.

Others say “ lesbian” as a word is ant iquated and as an identity is outmoded, essentially an exclusive term meant to separate women-born women from others who identify as queer women.

typify mainstream LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual, and trans-

How do you respond to the on-going exploration and chal-

sexual) communities as being oppressive or assimilationist.”

lenges of gender ident it y as it impacts lesbians - and in

I’ve come to realize “queer” is not an umbrella word only, but a new politic…that springs out of the thought line of Queer Theory. I studied up on QT. It’s very complex, and as a L .F. I don’t agree with all of it, especially its sweeping,

particular, the “Lesbian Nation” you have so beautifully descr ibed in your book? Do you still use the word “ lesbian” to describe your personal or political self ? Is there a Lesbian Nation of any sort today? Do we need one?

post-constructionist generalization that gender identity is

Jea nne: 1) Yes, I st i l l proud ly use t he “L” word for a l l

all performativ it y, indeed a replacement of the ideolog y

my selves.

under pinning the now libera l gay & lesbian movement.

LGBT movement. Erased by the heteronormative world, and so often by our own G, T, and B siblings. As long as

2) L esbia n Nat ion st i l l ex ist s. L esbia n Connect ion has

this erasure stands, we still need Lesbian Nation because

20,0 0 0 readers; t housands st i l l go to lesbian music fes-

we as queer women, as people who still claim “woman,”

tivals. True, new generations don’t understand fully the

are not t he same as gay men, or transmen, or bisexua l

concept of L N as Johnston & W hiting, but they/we still

men—we need our damn “L .” We need to know our tribe,

live in tribal identity & community & witness each other

our her itage —no matter how many other adject ives we

doing so.

choose to also embrace.

buried. Heaped on top of it have been so many issues, so-

and 3) We st i l l N EE D L esbian Nat ion— and we’re st i l l

© Apr il 2012 Jea nn e C ordova a n d Marg i e Ada m Int e r v i e w,

called civil rights, like how we want to serve in a military

mad-as-hell that the “L” word remains so erased in the

All Rights Reserved.

That it did represent a partial departure, but also a building upon the ideolog y of feminism that took up where it left of f. That it did represent all the things I just half-way repudiated. That the Queer Movement looks at gender and sexuality as the core habitats. I do believe that the radical core, the outlaw core, of the L BGT Movement has been

716702 10x8 4c

Domestic partners have unique investment planning needs and challenges. You’ve worked hard to create a life and build wealth together, now you want to make sure your treasured nest egg will always be there for each other. We understand what you are facing — and we want to be a part of your success.

Wells Fargo Advisors was the first in the industry to offer the Accredited Domestic Partnership Advisor℠ or ADPA℠ designation. Our Financial Advisors who have the ADPA℠ designation have been trained and certified on key issues affecting domestic partners and are dedicated to providing you tailored investment planning solutions to help you meet your financial goals.

Visit us at wellsfargoadvisors.com/adpa to find an ADPA℠ certified advisor near you.

Wells Fargo Advisors is the trade name used by two separate registered broker-dealers: Wells Fargo Advisors, LLC, and Wells Fargo Advisors Financial Network, LLC, Members SIPC, non-bank affiliates of Wells Fargo & Company.

Accredited Domestic Partnership Advisor℠ and ADPA℠ are service marks of the College for Financial Planning ®. © 2012 Wells Fargo Advisors 716702 10x8 4c.indd 1

4/24/12 4:11 PM 3 BAY T IM ES M AY 3, 2012

Cinco de Mayo: An Opportunity to Consider LGBTQ Rights Without Borders

525 Bellevue Avenue Oakland CA 94610 Phone: 510-846-8158 E-mail: editor@sfbaytimes.com www.sfbaytimes.com STAFF Dr. Betty L. Sullivan Jennifer L. Viegas

P H OTO S O U R C E : N AT I O NA L C ENTER FOR LES BIA N R IGHTS

Guest Editorial

Co-Publishers & Co-Editors

Arcelia Hurtado, NCLR

Ayana Baltrip Balagas Design Direction & Production

Abby Zimberg Design & Production

Cinco de Mayo, commonly mistaken for Mexican Independence Day, is, in fact, celebrated primarily in the United States. It commemorates the May 5, 1862 Battle of Puebla where the vastly outnumbered and less well equipped Mexican Army defeated the French army, which at that point had not been defeated for almost 50 years. The news of the defeat of the French invaders reportedly touched off one of the first Cinco de Mayo celebrations right here in California. Mexican miners working in California’s gold country were so overjoyed by the news that they fired off rif le shots, fireworks, sang patriotic songs and made impromptu speeches. During the 1960s, and at the height of the Chicano Civil Rights Movement that paralleled other struggles for social justice in this country, Cinco de Mayo was adopted as a symbolic date and opportunity to celebrate Mexican cultural pride, perseverance in the face of adversity, and resistance in the face of political oppression. Today, most people in the United States see Cinco de Mayo as an opportunity to drink margaritas, Mexican beer, and eat their favorite Mexican foods like enchiladas and guacamole.

The commercialization of the holiday is undeniable and has its roots in the need for American corporations to make inroads into the booming Latino market. Ironically, the commercialization of what was once a symbol of the Chicano Civil Rights Movement started when Coors Brewing

Karen Williams Special Ambassador & Advertising Executive Karen@sfbaytimes.com

Juan Torres Advertising Executive Juan@sfbaytimes.com Manny Apolonio Calendar Editor

Barbara Brust / Lucille Design Webmaster & Technology Director

Michael Denison Business Manager

Juan Ordonez Distribution

ADVISORY BOARD Tracy Gary Nanette Lee Miller, CPA James C. Freeman Jim Rosenau Judy Young, MPH Gary Virginia Dixie Horning CONTRIBUTORS Writers

Rink, Sister Dana Van Iquity, Ann Rostow, Linda Ayres-Frederick, Annette Lust, Kirsten Kruse, Teddy Witherington, David Grabstald, Kate Kendell, Pollo del Mar, Linda Kay Silva, Albert Goodwyn, Tom W. Kelly, Heidi Beeler, Jeanie Smith, K. Cole, Gary M. Kramer, Dennis McMillan, Tom Moon, Paul E. Pratt, Terry Baum, Gypsy Rose, Karen Williams, Gary Virginia, Shar Rednour, Stu Smith, Zoe Dunning, Kathleen Archambeau, Mykel Mogg, Robert Fuggiti

P H OTO SO UR C E : W I K I PE DI A | MATT H E W STABE N

2261 Market Street, No. 309 San Francisco CA 94114 Phone: 415-503-1386

P H OTO SO UR C E : W I K I PE DI A | MI R ADO R O B I SPADO

Kim Corsaro Publisher 1981-2011

Company decided it wanted to improve its image among Latinos who had long-boycotted the company for its discriminatory practices.

At the National Center for Lesbian Rights, where we fight for social change at the intersection of sexual identity with race, class and gender/gender identity, we will celebrate Cinco de Mayo with gusto, but we will not forget the spirit underlying this special date in Mexican history. Just as the outnumbered Mexican soldiers fought against all odds for their country’s independence from the French, lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender immigrants from Mexico stand up every day in the face of oppression and violence in their home country and assert their right to be who they are.

To love who they love. To survive and not be obliterated by hate and violence. To truly live the distant dream of true equality that remains so elusive for far too many in our community. They are not unlike any of us, separated as we are by only an imaginary border created by a war fought many years ago and not in our name.

They are people like Gina, Laura and Rosa*, three transgender Mexican immigrants who work in the dusty farm fields in the Gilroy/Salinas/Monterey area, picking the crops that make their way to our tables, enduring unspeakable harassment and abuses at work while simultaneously fearing for their safety if they were to return to their home country. They fled Mexico and seek asylum in the United States because they endured a lifetime of

abuse at home, at school, in their neighborhoods and at the hands of strangers and relatives. They sometimes even suffered persecution by police.

At all times, they endured emotional and physical violence and sexual assault. They were beaten with sticks, whips, rocks, bottles and bags of urine.

They were chased by mobs of men who wanted to either beat or rape them. NCLR proudly represents them in asylum proceedings.

They are people like Alicia and her partner Luz, a lesbian couple from Mexico. NCLR represents Alicia, who is currently in deportation proceedings. Luz was deported back to Mexico, leaving her child behind in the United States. These are the diff icult circumstances that far too many LGBT people and families from Mexico face on a daily basis.

So this Cinco de Mayo, as we all raise our margarita glasses to toast the Battle of Puebla, let us not forget the plight of our brothers and sisters across the border. Let us not turn a blind eye to those living here, but hiding in the shadows for fear of being returned to a place of sure death or those locked in detention in a dark cell, wondering whether they will see their children again. Their plight is our concern because they are part of our community. To care about their future is to care about our own. *Names changed to preserve anonymity.

Photographers/ Illustrators

Rink, Dennis McMillan, Steve Underhill, Phyllis Costa, Cathy Blackstone, Robert Fuggati

BACK PAGE CLUB Catch Restaurant Fountaingrove Lodge Jordan, Miller & Associates Pelican Art Gallery NAPA Cellars Wines Olivia Travel

ADVERTISING Display Advertising Rate cards are available by calling 415-503-1386 #3 or e-mail ads@sfbaytimes.com.

Classified Advertising: Refer to the order form in The Classifieds section, which you may mail or fax in, or e-mail us at classifieds@sfbaytimes.com. Deadline is 3 p.m. the Thursday preceding publication. For display classified information, please call Display Advertising at 415-503-1386 #3.

P HOTO BY M ICHA EL DE NISON /BAY TI MES

Thank you to our leading advertisers.

“Bay Times Live!” at Cafe Flore

National Advertising: Contact Bay Times / San Francisco. Also represented

by Rivendell Media., Mountainside, NJ 908-232-2021.

Person of the Week: Shannon Minter, Esq.

Calendar performers, clubs, individuals or groups who want to list events should mail, e-mail or fax notices so that they reach us by 5 p.m. the Thursday prior to publication. Please e-mail items to be considered for the Calendar to calendar@sfbaytimes.com. We cannot take listings by phone.

LETTERS TO THE EDITOR If you would like to write a letter to the editor with comment on an article or suggestions for the Bay Times, email us at editor@sfbaytimes.com. © 2012 Bay Times Media Co, Inc. Co-owned by Betty L. Sullivan & Jennifer L. Viegas Reprints by permission only.

4 BAY TIMES MAY 3, 2012

P H OTO SO UR C E : N AT I O N AL C E NT E R F O R LES BI AN R IG H TS

CALENDAR

During conversations with NCLR leaders this week, Bay Times heard one name cited as the legal eagle hero who remains sometimes unsung – Shannon Minter. Serving as the organization’s Legal Director, Shannon was lead counsel for same-sex couples in the landmark California marriage equality case in 2008 and also on Sharon Smith’s groundbreaking wrongful death suit in 2001.

Originally from Texas, Shannon graduated from Cornell Law School in 1993 and has taught law at Stanford University, Golden Gate University and Santa Clara University.

A trans man who transitioned at age 35, Shannon did not change his name

when he transitioned from female to male, although he later added the middle name Price in honor of his uncle who died in 2003. In 2001 Shannon was married, but says he feels it is an unjustice that transgender individuals may marry although gay and lesbian couples cannot.

He received a Ford Foundation “Leadership for a Changing World” award in 2005, and was named California Lawyer of the Year by California Lawyer in 2009. He received an Honorary Degree from the City University of New York School of Law for advocacy on behalf of same-sex couples and their families.

The Week in Review

By Ann Rostow The Gay Guy Leaves Romney Campaign I really don’t care a great deal about Richard Grenell, Mitt Romney’s short-lived openly gay foreign policy spokesman, but I think his 15 minutes of fame are somewhat instructive. No sooner had we all learned that the Romnster hired a gay advisor for the general election, the man was gone, resigning last weekend as the Romney campaign reportedly begged him to stay.

Grenell, who previously served as press liaison for UN Ambassador John Bolton, was hired a couple of weeks ago, much to the chagrin of Romney’s conservative base. He also roiled the waters a bit with his semi-humorous tweets at the expense of women on both sides of the aisle, including the comment that Callista Gingrich “snapped on” her hair every morning. (Loved it, Ric.) Indeed, I instantly jumped to the conclusion that Grenell had been ousted for being a public misogynist, but that appears to be wrong. According to Washington Post writer Jennifer Rubin, who broke the story of Grenell’s departure, the man was simply fed up with being relegated to the back shelf of the closet during his first ten days on the job. Faced with far right criticism, the Romney camp never defended Grenell, nor did they put him to work either on or off the camera.

In short, the feckless Mitt tried to have his cake and eat it too, winning centrist credit for hiring a gay man while keeping his token recruit safely out of sight. Now, antigay conservatives are taking credit for getting rid of Grenell, while Romney and company look as if they caved in to far right pressure even though they sort of didn’t. All in all, a pathetic display, n’est-ce pas?

Swans’ Way Oh. Here’s something nice. Two lesbian swans have returned to Boston’s Public Garden this week after spending the winter at a zoo. I gather from reading more than the headline that all the local swans spend the winter at a local zoo, so this is not actually “gay” news. But still. The swans, Romeo and Juliet, were outed back in 2005 when park officials investigated why their eggs weren’t hatching.

Turned out the nesting swans were both female, and since we all know that swans mate for life, the pair have become icons of the lesbian animal world.

Park officials said it’s hard to tell if a swan can really be called a “lesbian.”

That said, the couple was observed at a local Home Depot having what appeared to be a squawking dispute near the bean straw display. They also took an unapproved trip to Chestnut Hill for the first round of the ACC Women’s basketball tournament in early March and were picked up at Fran’s Place on the Northshore after zookeepers received an anonymous tip. A zoo assistant reported that both swans smelled of alcohol and cigarettes on their return.

Let There Be Light So. Several stories that I’ve been ignoring of late have come to the fore this week. Tennessee politics, anyone?

I thought not. How about more idle speculation on the North Carolina marriage vote? No? Well, perhaps you’ve been wondering why this column has failed to report on the lesbian den mother who was banned from participating in her son’s Scout troop last month.

I think you understand my dilemma.

But before we begin, here’s something I’ve been wondering about. Why don’t the police on TV crime shows ever turn on the goddamn lights when they go into people’s homes to look for stuff? Have you noticed this?

Instead of flipping on the electricity. they pull out their tiny f lashlights and wander around looking at desks or bookshelves. And let me be clear.

They do this after they have already made sure no bad guys are in the house, so they don’t have any excuse for it. Also, it annoys me that everyone’s house or apartment is always perfectly neat, with the exception of deranged suspects who might have a pizza box or two in the kitchen.

I mea n, rea l ly. T he C SI tea m will find two empty wine glasses on the table.

“Sarah. Take a look at this.”

“Looks like she had company.”

You know what? I’ve got at least five dirty wine glasses floating around this house right now, and I drank from them all. I just haven’t gotten around to washing them. What’s going to happen if I get murdered?

“Sarah, Take a look at these.”

“Yeah. I noticed one in the bedroom and another on the floor of the closet.”

“She must have had half a dozen people over here last night!”

“Look at these dirty towels. She hasn’t done laundry in days.”

“But why?”

“That’s what we’re here to find out.”

Raleigh the Troops Okay. Enough frivolity. Perhaps you recall that our latest antigay marriage ballot vote is coming up next Tuesday in North Carolina. So far, I’ve seen nothing but depressing polls that suggest we will once again lose and that the Cancer State will join the crowds of states with a ban on samesex unions engraved in their constitutions.

Lately, however, I’ve read a few encouraging articles hinting that there might be some slim chance of an upset victory for our side. The North Carolina measure could also outlaw various partner arrangements and might undermine domestic violence laws that cover unmarried men and women who live together. Polls show that a majority of voters support civil unions or domestic partnerships, so in theory, if these voters recognize the broad threat implicit in the marriage measure, they’ll vote no.

But at the risk of throwing cold water on our feverish hopes, let me make two points. First, the f ine citizens of North Carolina don’t, and won’t, recognize the nuanced implications of their “save traditional marriage!” votes. Wishing and hoping for a sophisticated electorate doesn’t produce one.

Second, before every antigay ballot vote, there are always last minute articles claiming that we still have a chance to win, but we never do. I’d be delighted to be proved wrong, but I don’t think North Carolina will be the scene of any humbling forecasting errors on my part.

We’ll see, of course. Maybe I’m just tired of jumping like a hungry puppy for every morsel of optimism that someone dangles at GLBT journalists on the eve of a gay vote. The juicy tidbits invariably vanish, leaving us

Professional Services digging for unappetizing slops in the troughs of failure and discontent. Not this time! Not in North Carolina.

To give you an example, here’s a headline off the Washington Post blog that reads: “Gay Marriage Battle Down to Wire in North Carolina.”

Read further, and the item cites a Public Policy Polling survey, released on May 1, that shows Amendment One winning by 55-41. Sorry, folks.

That doesn’t sound like a close race to me. We have an advantage in ready cash, so we may be able to outspend the other side in the final days. But unless my first grade math fails me, we’re down by 14 points.

Better Luck Next Time?

I have higher hopes for our f ight against a marriage amendment in Minnesota, where we have until Election Day this fall to push a majority of voters to our side. One article indicated that the amendment’s chances are evenly split within the margin of error, a turn of phrase that leads me to assume that we are down by three or four points. As in North Carolina, we have more money. And we also appear to have more enthusiastic grassroots support.

We also have a bit of a rogue gay marriage lawsuit, now at the state trial court level in Hennepin County.

This is not a Gay, Inc.-approved lawsuit, which traditionally means that it doesn’t have much of a chance of success. But you know what? Our legal progress of late is such that even the rogue cases may eventually prove winnable.

This particularly lawsuit was filed in 2010, and tossed out of court on the basis of the famous 1971 Minnesota state marriage case, Baker v Nelson, a defeat which has continued to plague us for over four decades. The plaintiffs appealed, and the state Court of Appeals helpfully ruled that Baker was no longer good law. Last month, the state supreme court declined to review that decision, so the case has now returned to the lower court for trial.

I’m guessing that gay strategists feel it unwise to be pursuing a freedom-tomarry case during an anti-marriage campaign. After all, you can’t argue that a marriage amendment is “unnecessary,” when pending litigation is there for all to see just exactly how “necessary” an amendment might be.

(If you hate same-sex marriage, constitutional amendments are absolutely necessary and it’s disingenuous for marriage equality supporters to suggest otherwise. But more importantly, it’s alarming when people on our side attempt to play a shell game with ballot campaigns. Anti-marriage amendments aren’t “unnecessary,” they are wrong.)

Whatever their reasons, community strategists have not encouraged this lawsuit. At this rate, however, the case will still be mired in the courts by the time Minnesotans go to the polls, and who knows? Perhaps a struggle for equality featuring real people will tweak a heart string or two.

Don’t Say Goat So I did sort of promise to talk about Tennessee politics. The Volunteer State was considering a “Don’t Say Gay” type law that would have ordered public schools to steer clear of any mention of sexual orientation. After months of headlines, all of which I ignored, the bill was shelved and killed at the last minute. This confirmed my general policy of not cov(continued on page 20)

Read more @www.sfbaytimes.com and check us out on Twitter and Facebook.

BAY T IM ES M AY 3, 2012 5

National News Briefs compiled by Dennis McMillan

Topeka, KS - Ex-K lansman’s Gay Son Challenges Conservative House Democrat – 4.26

Center City, PA - Pennsylvania to Get First Openly Gay State Legislator, and It’s About Time! – 4.26

Openly gay Erich Bishop, 28, told gay rights advocates that his father was a former member of the Ku K lux K lan, say ing, “To call my household as a child racist and homophobic would be an understatement. My father rightly faced opposition from people like you.” Bishop spoke against a bill that gay activists worry will sanction discrimination against LGBTQs under the guise of religious freedom. He also announced he is challenging one of the chief proponents of the bi l l, House Democrat ic Representat ive Jan Pauls.

Brian Sims, a 33-year-old law yer, is defeating Center City’s longtime representative in the state House, making him the f irst openly-gay state lawmaker in Pennsylvania. Sims has a 233-vote lead over his fellow Democratic opponent Babette Josephs, with 51.6 percent of the vote, according to unof f icial returns. Sims served as Josephs’ campaign treasurer when she won reelection two years ago. He will be unopposed in November unless an independent candidate gets into the race.

Pauls, a law yer who has been in the Legislature for 20 years, has been as rightwing as any of her Republican colleagues on social issues. SB 142 seeks to prevent government from burdening an individual’s exercise of religion unless there is a compelling governmental interest. Proponents like Pauls and Republican Lance Kinzer argue it is about ensuring religious freedom. But Thomas Witt of the Kansas Equality Coalition said the bill is about undermining local ordinances, such as one in Lawrence prohibiting land lords and businesses from d iscr im inat ing based on sexua l or ient at ion. K inzer exempl if ied a wedd ing photog rapher sued for refusing to take pictures of a same-sex wedding. Pauls earlier spoke against removing an anti-sodomy law from the state’s books.

“It’s because of the work Babette has done over the years that I was able to run and win in a district like this,” Sims said. “The campaign was about ideas and who could do the best job going forward; not a referendum on the past 27 years.”

Josephs, 71, has been a strong advocate for liberal and progressive causes since she was f irst elected to the House in 1984, representing Center City and some neighborhoods in South Philly. Sims, who is also a motivational speaker, had said during the campaign that he was willing to “work across the aisle” with Republicans who control the state House and the state Senate, as well as the governor’s of f ice.

Source: Philly.com

Source: Topeka Capital-Journal

Boston, MA – Barney Is Quite Frank with His Opinions of Gov. Romney – 4.26

Boulder, CO – Civil R ights Bill Could Pass, Unless Bible Says No – 4.27 Gay civil unions passed the Colorado Senate after senators recited Bible verses, passages of Shakespeare and even a section of military law. Senator Rollie Heath revealed his job in the Army was to sign off on discharge forms dismissing military members who were gay. But Heath later became a passionate supporter of gay rights. All 20 Democrats plus the three women in the GOP caucus supported the measure by Democrat Senator Pat Steadman, who is gay. The 12 men in the GOP caucus voted against.

It will have a tough time in the House: Republicans holding a 33-32 majority.

Openly gay Congressman Barney Frank made it clear how he feels about Mitt Romney, calling the presidential candidate’s politics “despicable.” After a National Stonewall Democrats event, Frank said that Romney’s recent remarks about marriage equality (that he was proud that he prevented Massachusetts from “becoming the Las Vegas of gay marriage”) while that state’s governor, downplay the importance of same-sex love.

“That’s saying our marriages were a trick, were a sham,” Frank said. “He’s clearly prepared to embrace the most — oh, and supporting a constitutional amendment. What that says is that existing marriages are abolished. That’s just outrageous.”

Regarding Amendment 2 of ’92, Democrat Senator Ellen Roberts said, “I could not believe that in this great, generous, freespirited state of mine … we had just passed a constitutional amendment that denied gay people basic rights and liberties.”

Republican Scott Renfroe preached, “I truly believe Jesus is a better answer than Senate Bill 2. Adopting laws that change our definition of morality will tear at the fabric of society.” Democrat Mike Johnston countered, “For me, the great mystery of the Lord is … unconditional love. It is as simple as John 4:8, ‘God is love.’”

Frank also accuses Romney of “lying” when he says he opposes discrimination, arguing, “How does he oppose discrimination? He’s not for any legislation that would make it illegal. So how does he oppose it? He is for a discrimination that would dissolve all the existing marriages. So what does that mean when he says that?”

Frank also insists the prez wannabe deserves no praise for hiring openly gay former UN ambassador Richard Grenell as his foreign policy spokesman. “We’re beyond giving people credit for not overtly discriminating,” the congressman curtly countered.

Source: Denverpost.com

Source: Washington Blade

New York, NY – Dr. Spitzer: Loved Him; Hated Him; Love Him Again – 4.28 Dr. Robert Spitzer, a psychiatrist who published a controversial 2001 study suggesting that in some instances gays could change their sexual orientation, has now retracted those claims. He had led the ef fort to declassify homosexuality as a mental illness in 1973 in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of the A merican Psychiatric Association. In 2007, Spitzer said he was uncomfortable with groups like Focus on the Family and other homophobes who misused his study [to ultimately make queers second-class citizens and deny them rights, as in Prop H8].

Spitzer was drawn to the topic of ex-gay therapy because it was controversial, but was troubled by how the study was used. “I believe I owe the gay communit y an apolog y for my study mak ing unproven claims of the ef f icacy of reparative therapy,” he said. “The f indings can be considered evidence for what those who have undergone ex-gay therapy say about it, but nothing more.” The editor of the Archives of Sexual Behavior refused to accept Spitzer’s retraction. Spitzer said he was proud of hav ing been instrumental in remov ing homosexualit y from the list of mental disorders and was afraid the 2001 study would tarnish his legacy and perhaps hurt others. He emphasized ex-gay therapy “can be quite harmful.”

Source: American Prospect and MS NBC news

Local News Briefs Stop Busting Our Medical Pot Dispensaries!

Webby Awards Recognizes SF Pride Parade Live Webcast with Honors

The Patient Advocacy Committee of the SF Medical Cannabis Task Force has gathered thousands of signatures from SF voters to deliver to Representative Nancy Pelosi in reaction to recent closures of local medical cannabis cooperatives and the five additional cooperatives slated to close their doors mid-May. Patient advocates are hopeful that Pelosi will help end the assault on medical cannabis cooperatives, because of her long history of support for medical cannabis and HIV/AIDS issues. Patient advocates request Pelosi prevent the destruction of SF’s regulatory program that serves thousands of patients with safe and legal medical cannabis.

The live webcast of the 2011 SF LGBT Pride Parade has been selected as Webby Awards Honoree in the Online Film and Video – Events and Live Webcasts category. The live webcast of the Parade, produced by Clear Channel SF in collaboration with the SF Pride Celebration Committee, provides live, uncensored coverage of the entirety of the Parade down Market Street. The 2011 Parade coverage was hosted by Donna Sachet with Michelle Meow, Sebastian Kunz, Morris Knight and Celeste Perry.

A Democratic Party resolution, spearheaded by Gabriel Haaland, supports the rights of cannabis patients by calling on ALL Democratic leadership, including President Obama and Attorney General Eric Holder, to protect safe access and not circumvent state law with the Department of Justice resources. The Harvey Milk Democratic Club also voted unanimously to co-sponsor the patient advocates’ petition. “The Harvey Milk LGBT Democratic Club calls on representative Pelosi and all elected officials to protect our medical cannabis clubs and ensure access to medical cannabis for marginalized, low income patients and demand a stop to the harassment by federal agents,” said Glenn Hyde, president of the Milk Club.

Source: Personal interview by Dennis McMillan

6 BAY TIMES MAY 3, 2012

“Every year, our live webcast keeps raising the bar, so it is deeply gratifying that we have been recognized as a Webby Awards Honoree. I am grateful for all the support from the team at Clear Channel San Francisco who have made the webcast a growing success,” said SF Pride Executive Director Brendan Behan. “Bringing this important civic celebration of our diverse LGBT community to viewers around the globe is such an important part of showing the world that the struggle for LGBT rights, dignity and equality is as vibrant and strong as ever.”

More than 8,000 entries were submitted to the 16th Annual Webby Awards, and fewer than 15 percent were distinguished as an Official Honoree.

Source: Pride ED Brendan Behan

Do Ask, Do Tell Zoe Dunning I’m excited to contribute to the Bay Times with this bi-weekly summary of noteworthy LGBT news and events.

Another post-repeal first: Same-sex marriage proposal on military base On April 24, a Navy veteran (and victim of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell), did ask and did tell his Marine boyfriend he wanted to marry him. This historic moment happened as the Marine arrived at Camp Pendleton in southern California following a tour of duty in Afghanistan. It is believed to be the first on-base marriage proposal involving a same-sex couple (or at least the only one that had a reporter and photographer standing by to document it!). As a retired Navy Commander, I just have to smile and remember how out of reach a moment like this seemed five years ago.

As MLK famously said, the arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends toward justice.

Out Magazine announces its annual “Power List” Not a ble B ay A r e a que er s w ho made the list include Apple CEO Tim Cook at #1, venture capital-

i st Peter T h iel at #3, f i na nc ia l Advisor and talk show host Suze Or ma n (#25), Google execut ive Meg a n Sm it h (# 45), C A Supe r ior C ou r t Jud g e V ic k y K ol a kowski (#56), and CA State Senator Mark Leno (#59). These lists are meant to be provocative and generate disagreement, so I have to take the bait and say: Really?

A ndy Cohen is #10 a nd A n n ise Parker, t he mayor of t he four t h largest city in the United States, is #29? How does a guy who inter v iews Bravo’s R eal Housew ives ran k as more power ful t han t he chief executive of Houston, a city w it h a p o pu l at ion l a r g er t h a n 15 states? I had t he pr iv i lege of meeting Mayor Parker on an Oliv ia cr uise earl ier t h is year and you won’t f i nd a more dow n to e a r t h , s m a r t , de d ic at ed le a der than Annise. Her responsibilities are huge as she impacts millions of people every day. I would be interested in Out ’s criteria for ranking people, because that’s a real head-scratcher.

Oh no, here come those campaign mailings!

For those who are blissfully happy t hat last fa l l’s elect ion season is over, I hate to say you w ill soon see political ads coming to a mailbox near you. It w ill be nothing like what we saw w ith a l l of the city-wide races going on last year – mayor, sherif f, district attorney, etc. However, June 5t h’s pr imar y is com i ng up soon, a nd w it h it comes t he bi-a n nua l g a me of Concentration that is the Democratic County Central Committee ( DCCC) race. If you are a regis-

Sister Dana Sez This was also the Idina Menzel (Wicked’s original Elphaba) CD release party for Live: Barefoot at the Symphony.

Sister Dana Van Iquity wishes a Happy Cinco de Mayo to all you hot tamales out there!

TRIBUTE TO OZ was at the Midnight Sun with Cookie Dough’s Monster Show, “A Visit to the Emerald City.” The night was absolutely wizard (literally) with songs from Wicked and The Wiz. Cookie appeared as Dorothy Gale in Oz - lip-synching OZzy Osborne’s Ozzfest of “Over the Mountain” in her blue gingham dress and red sequined slippers, joining cardboard characters of Scarecrow and Lion, when she ran into the “wicked” witch (a green Jill FeltaFish) doing “No Good Deed,” “The Wizard and I,” and “Defying Gravity” (this last on top of the bar). Florence Frightengale, as a nun, lipped “No Bad News” from The Wiz and “Return to Oz” by the Scissor Sisters. Glitterella, a large and in charge bearded bear, did Wiz’s “You Can’t Win.” Megan Pixel did The Tamperer’s “Drop a House,” punching and kicking the witch to the ground.

Jackie Cox was a green witch doing “The Red Shoe Blues” by Andrew Lloyd Webber, and later reappeared as a mature Dorothy from Wiz singing live a heart-wrenching “Home.”

PEACHES & TOMMY are acid queens! Peaches Christ presented a tribute to Ken Russell (1927-2011) screening his 1975 rock opera Tommy movie and clips from several of his delightfully weird erotic f licks (i.e.

Lair of the White Worm, The Devils, The Music Lovers) at Sundance Kabuki.

On stage was a giant bust of Peaches and a huge pink glittered guitar.

Monks (Citizen Midnight) wearing Marilyn Monroe masks took the stage, stripped off their capes, picked up their instruments and rocked the house as Trixxie Carr sang “Pinball Wizard.” Peaches noted the movie featured the most intense “sploshing” scene ever – with an avalanche of beans and soapsuds practically drowning Ann-Margret. Peaches’ next production, July 28, is “Silence of the Trans.” Can’t wait!

MARCONI CALINDAS is displaying “Colorful Expressions,” sponsored by McKinley Art Solutions, now through June 5th at Hotel Triton, 342 Grant Avenue. Black outlines and pure hues achieving a kind of stained glass effect - inspired by his time in Guam and Northern Mariana Islands - form Calindas’ distinctive style. His subject matter ranges from pop icons (Madonna, RuPaul, John Lennon) to triumphs of the human spirit (Supervisor Harvey Milk, the Pride Rainbow Flag to angels, sunflowers, a family pet, and the iPod).

AIDS LEGAL REFERRAL PANEL (ALRP) held its 12th annual vol-

tered Democrat, prepare yourself to look down a list of 20 -30 names on your ballot and select up to a dozen or so names you recognize.

Like ordering dim sum, only different.

Professional Services

M a ny p e o ple don’t e ven k now wh at t he D C C C do es , but you should. It is the governing body for the Democratic part y in this city and carries the power to put t he of f ic i a l “ E n d or s e d b y t he Democratic Party” stamp on candidates. That by itself can be the dec id i ng factor for some voter s when they go to the polls.

It only takes 20 signatures to f ile papers and run for DCCC, so the r a c e t y pic a l ly d r aw s a her d of candidates, me included. Yes, in full disclosure, I am a candidate for DCCC in Assembly District 17 ( basically the eastern half of the city that is represented in Sacramento by Assemblymember Tom A mmiano.) It has been quite an experience these past four weeks goi ng f rom Democr at ic c lub to Democr at ic club a nd hu mbly a sk i ng for t hei r suppor t . W hen you receive not if icat ion you have received a club’s endor se ment, you have that split-second Sa l ly Field moment (“ T hey l i ke me! They really like me!”). But it wears of f quick ly and you move on to the next questionnaire and PAC inter v iew. I w i l l save some of my f u n n ier c a mpa i g n ex p e r iences for t he next colu m n.

That’s a wrap for my f irst column.

Please write and let me know what topics are of particular interest to you, at zoeforsf@gmail.com.

unteer appreciation party at Pillsbury Winthrop Shaw Pittman offices. ALRP’s mission is to help people with HIV/A IDS maintain or improve their health by resolving their legal issues, providing free and low-cost legal services to Bay Area clients. Founded in 1983, ALRP has handled over 60,000 legal matters for clients over the last 29 years, noted Executive Director Bill Hirsh. ALRP has grown to a full-time staff of eleven and a panel of over 700 volunteer attorneys donating over $1.5 million each year in pro bono legal services. Kudos!!!

Since 1974, SHANTI has enhanced the quality of life, health and wellbeing of people living with life-threatening illnesses, including breast cancer and HIV/AIDS. Shanti held “A Speakeasy Celebration” fundraiser at the Old Mint (the nostalgic “Granite Lady”) at Fifth Street & Mission to celebrate the courage of their clients, dedication of their staff and partners, and the accomplishments of the Shanti Breast Cancer Program in its eleventh year. Donna Sachet emceed.

Dressing in “Roaring 20’s” garb was encouraged. Betty Fu sang songs of the era. A specialty cocktail reception paired good booze with decadent chocolate served in the various vaults.

Two Shanti Breast Cancer Program Heroes were commended: Ju l ie Baumgartner, former Shanti board member, and Diane Carr, RN, NP, director of Breast & Cervical Cancer Services for the SF Department of Public Health. Executive Director Kaushik Roy summed it all up for clients: “We can’t promise you’ll be (continued from page 8) BAY T IM ES M AY 3, 2012 7

Losing the Love War

Examined Life Tom Moon, MFT Q: After two years together, my boyfriend still holds me at arm’s length.

He’s got a problem with the “L” word.

He says I should just know how he feels without needing him to say it.

He has a thousand friends and has to spend time with every one of them, so I get about one evening alone with him every week. And most of the time he won’t schedule anything with me.

Whenever I try to make plans with him in advance, he says “Well, let’s see how the week goes.”

He’s afraid of being close and committed, even though he wants it. I spent a lot of time in therapy getting

over my miserable childhood with emotionally checked-out parents, so I understand why he’s the way he is.

It all goes back to his own childhood with two alcoholic parents that he could never trust or rely on. He’s compulsively independent because he’s too afraid to let himself be intimate with anyone. He obviously needs therapy but he won’t consider it. We may not make it if I can’t get him to see somebody. How can I get him to understand that?

A: Are you asking the right question?

You’re on a mission to get your boyfriend into therapy so that he’ll get fixed and become the kind of partner you need. My question is: Who’s sweating? You have problems with how he’s living his life, but there’s nothing in what you wrote that suggests he does. Your idea that he’s deeply affected by unresolved childhood experiences sounds plausible, but isn’t that equally true of you? Is it just a coincidence that, having been raised by “emotionally checked-out parents,” you’re now trying to change an emotionally checked out boyfriend?

When children grow up in families with parents who can’t meet their

(SISTER DANA SEZ continued from page 7) okay, but we can promise you’ll never be alone.”

CORPUS CHRISTI is not just a thought-provoking play by Tony Award-winner Terrence McNally, imagining Jesus as a gay man living in 1950s Texas, but also an incredible documentary about the making of McNally’s controversial piece and the homophobes who protest it without having actually seen it. Mirroring the reflections of change in society today regarding freedom of speech, civil

E N DE AVOR F OU N DAT ION FOR THE ARTS seeks to support the arts in the GLBTQ community through individual grants and scholarships. Sister Dinah Might and I got to help out their fundraiser at the Celtic Coffee Company in the Tenderloin. Their aim is to not only support artists and students of the queer community, but also educate the larger population about talented GLBTQs by bringing their artistic expressions to life, and helping provide them with a pathway to successful careers. Check out effta.org.

Sister Dana always enjoys a nice big May pole with ribbons streaming from it; and that’s not a sexual reference – or is it?!

•••••••••••••••• M o r e N e w s,

S t o r i e s,

Arts &

Entertainment

@sfbaytimes.com •••••••••••••••• 8 BAY TIMES MAY 3, 2012

Unfortunately, love wars are almost always impossible to win. I think your real task is to stop struggling. Avoid the temptations of wishful thinking and ask yourself this hard question: If you could know for certain that he will never be any different than he is today, could you stay with him? Can you accept him as he is, including the qualities you don’t like? If the answer is no, maybe it’s time to move on.

Love by itself usually isn’t enough to keep a relationship going. Compatibility is equally important.

Tom Moon is a psychotherapist in San Francisco. His website is www.tommoon.net.

(NCLR continued from page 1)

rights, marriage equality and separation of church and state, this passion play is a vehicle for a community struggling to f ind its voice. Meanwhile, the company of actors finds itself on a journey that would forever change their lives. They tour as the “I AM Love” Campaign, teaching audiences to love themselves for who they are. See corpuschristi-themovie. com. James Brandon (who plays Jesus) said, “As the voices of intolerance around the world continue preaching ignorance and hate, we will keep raising our voices from a place of love, and we will spread that love to places where love for LGBT people is lacking.” Rev. Cindi Love, executive director of Soulforce - engaging in nonviolent resistance to bring freedom to LGBTQ people suffering from religious oppression - gave a moving speech at the Castro Theatre.

We Sisters presented a blessing of the kneeling cast, covering them with a massive veil and glittering them. The SF Gay Men’s Chorus sang numbers from Godspell. I then saw the play and was moved to tears.

and

emotional needs they typically become adept at the “love war.” They learn to beg, demand, manipulate, wheedle, cajole, guilt-trip – whatever gets them something approximating love and attention. Many develop a “reparative fantasy” – the delusion that there’s some way they can f ix their caregivers so that they’ll become the parents they should be. Unfortunately, those who have this pattern often carry it into adulthood. They connect with partners who, like your boyfriend, have an avoidant relationship style, and then they treat them as human reclamation projects.

stone—turning 35 years old, an opportunity for us to look back on our history-making cases, and champions who have stood up against injustice and changed the legal landscape for every member of our community,” said Kendell. “We’re thrilled to celebrate how far we’ve come by honoring those who are standing up for what’s right, becoming role models for millions of people across the country.”

Kate Clinton returns for a command performance as emcee. A special guest at the celebration will be out actor Wilson Cruz, known for roles in television’s My So-Called Life and the Broadway production of Rent.

Cr uz, an advocate for LGBTQ equality and youth, will present the Courage Award to the Anoka-Hennepin students.

We at the Bay Times hope to see many of you at the NCLR Anniversary Celebration, where we come together to honor those who have become role models for millions of people through their unfailing commitment to justice.

For three decades, NCLR has led historic cases, and today is still trailblazing in pursuit of fairness, and legal protections for all LGBTQ people.

See special section pages 11-14.

(MACONDRAY cont. from page 1) works. He also supports numerous LGBTQ causes.

The chapters of Maupin’s real life’s book continue to unfold but, looking back at his already prolific career, he said, “Most gay fiction I was reading when I was coming out in the early 70s made me claustrophobic because it only dealt with the life of the gay bar and everybody in it was gay. Often gay and male and there weren’t even any lesbians in the picture. That didn’t make me feel the way I wanted to feel about life and it didn’t correspond with the life that I was living in San Francisco which was wonderfully mixed up in terms of the people that came and went in my life and that was part of the enormous exhilaration of it. It felt revolutionary.”

It still does. Happiest of birthdays to you, Armistead Maupin, and may you enjoy many, many more birthdays to come!

Tales of Armistead

In May of 1976, Susan Stokeld, a regular customer of Zott’s in the financial district in the City, started regaling me and anyone near her stool at the bar about a “serial” that the Chronicle had started running by a handsome young Southern blonde boy. Within weeks it became the chief topic of conversation at my joint as well as at Perry’s in the Marina and The Washington Square Bar & Grill in North Beach.

On Friday’s, the then uber popular mainstream radio station KSFO had a regular sock hop at Zott’s, and the popular DJ Jim Lange suggested we have a ‘Tales of the City” party and the station along with KSAN, the huge rock station, would cover it.

Susan took charge and invited Armistead to lunch where we cocktailed and put together our 1st Tales soiree.

Localites like Quentin Kopp, Judge Ira Brown, Joan Hitchcock, television personalities, authors, politicians and columnists along with society dames and even a large contingent of “the gay’s” clamored to get drinks and celebrate the freedom and love Tales brought to “Sin City.” If memory serves me, at one point Armistead stood on a table and announced he was gay and took a hit off a joint.

The party was a giant success and several days later we got a note from Armistead thanking us and saying he had a blast and was still washing blue glitter our of his hair and clothes.

I’ve touched base with Armistead over the years, one time not long after the party he had a party for 49er football hero Dave Kopay at the Duck House on Telegraph Hill when Kopay burst out of the closet.

Mayor George Moscone and a host of other wonderful San Franciscans were there that night and many of us walked down the hill and closed the “Washbag” later that night.

Everyone thought he was handsome as hell, charming, witty and humble (all true). One young regular worked Armistead has been a supporter and SFBayTimes10x8 Week 2B:Layout 1 4/26/12 2:34 PM Page 1 for I. Magnin and said he’d get a donor to Shanti for many years so

P HOTO: F LOREN C E LOW P HOTOGRAP HY / SP E C IAL TO T H E BAY T IM E S

Stu Smith

Armistead Maupin on the occasion of publishing “Mary Ann in Autumn”

we connect there as well. One Pride weekend, my columnist buddy Bruce Bellingham called and asked me to go to the then Hotel Ana where Armistead and Laura Linney were doing press interviews. Anti gay candidate for governor Simon joined the party to do a press conference for his campaign. Beautiful, witty Ms. Linney asked Mr. Simon if he was aware that he was surrounded by homosexuals. He wasn’t, and exited like a brushfire.

Armistead is one of the great Mr. San Francisco’s.

We All Agree

KEEPSFGREEN.COM

(DOMA continued from page 1) a stay-at-home mom, taking care of our four-year old daughter while I undergo chemotherapy. Now, after fighting for my country in Iraq and fighting for my life with this illness, I am forced to fight the Speaker of the House in order to make sure that my family is cared for when I am gone.

It’s shameful.”

“Speaker Boehner’s politically motivated ongoing defense of these unjust laws is hurting military families,” said Sarvis. “It’s time to repeal DOMA

and revise these antiquated laws that are preventing all military families from being treated with fairness and equality. There cannot be two classes of service members.”

Stories

More, and Arts & Entertainment online @sfbaytimes.com

San Francisco Democratic Party San Francisco Labor Council San Francisco League of ConservationVoters San Francisco Chamber of Commerce Alice B Toklas LGBT Democratic Club Bernal Heights Democratic Club Californians Against Waste District 8 Democratic Club District 11 Democratic Club Harvey Milk LGBT Democratic Club Irish American Democratic Club Laborers Local 261 Noe Valley Democratic Club Richmond District Democratic Club San Francisco Building and Construction Trades Council San Francisco Conservation Corps San Francisco Firefighters, Local 798 San Francisco for Democracy San Francisco Log Cabin Republicans San Francisco Police Officers Association San Francisco Planning and Urban Research Association (SPUR) San Francisco Small Business Network San Francisco Young Democrats Teamsters 350 Teamsters 665 Westside Democratic Club *Partial List

Paid for by Keep San Francisco Green; No on Prop A, A Coalition of Recology, Labor, Business, and Environmentalists. Major Funding by Recology, A Resource Recovery Employee-Owned Company FPPC #1344802

Don't Call It Frisco

bunch of mannequins that we hung from the ceiling, and ladies and gents of the bar selected the characters they would portray in a costume contest.

Everyone wanted to come and as the night approached it was “the event” to be seen at. We decorated the place in Barbary Lane style, the staff all dressed as one of the characters and a party started. It was so crowded we started serving drinks in Leidsdorff Alley and Commercial Street and both radio stations and a few television stations joined the mayhem.

VOTE NO ON JUNE 5 TH BAY T IM ES M AY 3, 2012 9

Bay Area Real Estate Avoid the Most Common Buyer Errors p e n s i v e pr o c e s s . T he s e e r r or s generally fall into three areas: • Paying too much • Losing a dream home to another buyer • Buying the wrong home

Pam Winterbauer

Shoppi ng for a new home is a n emot ion a l ex per ience. It ’s a l so t ime consuming and comes w ith a myriad of details. Some buyers, however, caught up in the excitement of buying a new home, tend t o over lo ok s ome it em s . T he i r home purchase turns into an ex-

When you have a systematic plan before you shop, you’ll be sure to avoid these costly errors. Here are some tips on making the most of your home purchase: Bidd i ng w it hout su f f icient infor mation What price do you of fer a seller? Is the seller’s asking price too high?

I s it a de a l ? W it hout r e s e a r c h on t he m a rket a nd compa r able homes, you could lose thousands of dollars. Before you make that

of fer, be sure you have researched the market. A professional realtor can of fer an unbiased opinion on the value of a home based on market cond it ions, cond it ion of t he home and neighborhood. Without knowledge of the market, your offer could be too much. Or worse, you could miss out on a great buying opportunity.

Buying a mis-matched home What do you need and want in a home? Sounds simple. Yet, clearly identifying your needs and bringi n g a n objec t ive v iew to home shopping, leaves you in a better posit ion. S omet i mes, homebuyers buy a home that is too large or too small. Perhaps they didn’t consider t he d r ive to work , t he d ist ance to school, or t he many repa i r jobs wa it i ng for comple-

tion. Plan ahead. Use your needs list as a guideline for every home you view.

Unclear title Before you sign any document, be sure the property you are considering is free of all encumbrances.

As part of their services, a realtor can supply you with a copy of the title to ensure there are no liens, debts, undisclosed owners, leases or easements.

Outdated survey Before the purchase is completed, an updated survey is essential. This report will indicate boundaries and str uctura l changes (add it ions to the house, a new swimming pool, neighbor’s new fence that is extending a boundary line, etc.).

Unexpected repairs For $300 - $500 a professional inspector w i l l conduct a t horough inspection of the home. This way, you’ll have an idea of the cost of future repairs. Make the f inal contract subject to a favorable report.

Shopping without pre-approval It only takes a few days to get f inancing pre-approval. When you a r e s ho p pi n g for a home, t h i s gives you more power. A seller is more l i kely to consider a n of fer from a serious buyer.

Pam Winterbauer is the past president of the Bay East Association of Realtors, the 2006 Realtor of the Year, and is a broker-owner based in Northern CA.

The Enduring Value of A Victorian Era Home

Jason Allen-Rouman

The street-face of many a Victor ia n home del ight s t he eye a nd teases the imag inat ion. Visua l ly fortif ied with all manner of trim, e ven t he er s t wh i le g r a nd d a me and simple car penter row house evoke m i ld apprec iat ion, i f not nosta lg ia, for a long-lost way of life.

A s t he P resident of T he V icto r ia n A l l ia nce of Sa n Fra ncisco,

t he oldest not-for-prof it a l l-volunteer architectural preservation organization in The City, I know all too well the inherent persona l and publ ic sig n if icance t hese large and small bedazzling wonders carr y. I’m also a real estate professional with a keen sense of their market value.

For many, the idea of a real estate agent who is also a preservationist seems absurd. Don’t agents see dol la r sig ns a nd prof it wherea s preser v at ion i st s pic ket a nd ob str uct prog ress? The tr uth, as it often does, lies somewhere in between.

T he V ictor i a n A l l i a nce, whose members are bot h homeow ner s a nd renter s a l i ke, ha s deep r o ot s i n t he o p p o s it ion t o t he ea rly w ides pread demol it ion of t h i s c it y ’s V ic t or i a n - er a hou s i ng stock . T he dest r uct ion t hat

st a r ted i n T he M i s s ion d i st r ict and later moved to The Western Addition sparked an outrage that led to action.

W h a t s e e m s a n a t h e m a t o d a y, mow ing dow n per fect ly wonderfu l, interest ing, imag inat ive old houses to erect bland, expressionless apartments better suited for the grounds of a federal penitentiary, was too much by 1973. The sing ular v ision of our ded icated founders was to demonstrate how V ic t or i a n s wer e wor t h s av i n g.

A s t he f i r st w ave of i n ner c it y pioneer s r ec l a i m i n g t he fer t i le g round abandoned in d roves by the newly suburban, many worked t i r e le s s l y t o s a lv a g e t he i r ow n homes from neglect or downright abuse. They wanted to share what they’d learned and, thereby, help stem t he r u i nous t ide of a neutered landscape.

Today, our ranks swell with kindred spirits. With walkability and access to transit, restored Victorians thrive as active households.

And, just as importantly, they are scarce and highly desirable.

10 BAY TIMES MAY 3, 2012

As an agent, I live and breathe by represent i ng people eit her buying or selling a home. Victorians qu i ntessent ia l ly say “ Sa n Fra ncisco,” and ow n ing one bestows an air of authenticity to its inhabitants, especially when the propert y reads as wel l kept from the street. This holds true whether it is a condom i n iu m f lat, T IC , or s i ngle -fa m i ly dwel l i ng, t he l atter of which car r ies a premium, given our stock of them is well def ined w it h no rema in ing swat hs of large open space on which to build more.

Like all free markets, supply and dema nd def i ne a t rad i ng pr ice.

Right now, despite continued nat ional f inancial fears and global instability, San Francisco’s housing market is bustling.

A c cor d i n g to Sup er v i s or M a rk Fa r r e l l , t h e c i t y ’s u n e m p l o y ment rate is at 7.5%. Expanding technolog y compan ies, h ir ing at brea k neck rates a nd m i nt i ng young millionaires, have created a pool of eager would-be homeow ners. Combined w it h a nearr e c or d low i nvent or y of av a i l able proper t ies for sa le, roughly

a month and a half ’s worth, and sellers who’ve accepted a def lated starting point, we’ve seen the retur n of of fer dates and mu lt iple bids in many neighborhoods once seen as prime candidates for misguided 1960s “redevelopment.”

These are once again heady times in San Francisco real estate. We are and w i l l rema in a relat ively narrow spit of land at the tip of a spectacularly beautiful peninsula where people from all corners of the world want to live, work, and own a home. In every generation, some will leave in the midst of a recess ion, a f ter a n ea r t hqua ke, or when better weather beckons; beh i nd t hem w i l l be t hose who w i l l ingly rat iona l ize our cost of housing, feel com for t able da ncing w ith chance, and don’t want a sunburn.

Ja son All e n-R o u m a n i s t h e c u r re nt president of T he Victorian Alliance of San Francisco and a residential spec i ali st w ith S oth eby’s Int e r nat ional Realty.

NCLR Roundtable Bay Times co-publishers Dr. Betty L . Sullivan and Jennifer L . Viegas were recently inv ited to participate in a roundtable discussion with three notable NCLR leaders.

They included the organization’s founder, San Francisco Super ior C ou r t Jud g e D on n a H it c hen s , now retired, who is known for numerous jud icia l and commun it y accomplishments. Hon. Rober ta Actenberg, NCLR’s f irst executive director, is recognized throughout the US for her work in the Clinton and Obama administrat ions as well as for her roles in business, government and law. Kate Kendell is the feisty and beloved NCLR leader who is credited with holding the reins through the organization’s growth and development for more than a decade. Due to the tireless efforts of these three leaders, as well as their associates and supporters, NCL R is now recognized as a national force for human rights.

a r t icu lated a v ision for t he les bia n com mu n it y. Don na H itchens created an organization that could then expand into one with

C onver sat ion a mong t hese colleagues was lively and revealing.

A collegial discussion of seasoned activists, their words evidenced a common commitment and admirat ion for t he organ izat ion t hey have nur tured for decades. A lso shining through were signs of deep fr iendship and shared humanit y – human it y as on ly l i ke-m inded travelers can know it— especially those who choose to work as a team and to build that team while str iv ing for change dur ing times that are ripe w ith challenge and frustration, yet continually f illed with promise and hope.

a la rger nat iona l reach, fur t her i nst it ut iona l i zed so it cou ld become the group that Kate Kendell could later build into a larger and more inclusive organizat ion that would be even more v isionary, more than we could have ever imagined.

B ay Ti m es: G oi ng back to t he beginning, how did NCLR start?

W h at pr ompt e d s et t i n g up t he or ig i na l L esbia n R ight s P roject and how d id that occur through t he g r oup k now n a s t he E qu a l Rights Advocates?

Don n a H itc hen s: I wa s a law student in 1976 -77, working with t he E qua l R ight s Advocates on civil rights issues. The community was ver y focused on sodomy law and very little was being done on public access issues or employment or family law. The Berkeley Law Foundation was offering grants for innovative public law work, and I wanted to do a public interest law project on lesbian issues. The Equal Rights Advocates organization became the f iscal sponsor for the project we began. That was 35 years ago. Roberta Achtenberg became the executive director and led the development from the initial project under ERA to becoming its own 501c3 organization as the National Center for Lesbian Rights. In subsequent years, Kate Kendell has done a remarkable job in addressing marriage equality, employment nondiscrimination, adoption and second parent / co-parent adoption and military issues.

Rober ta Achtenberg: The sing u la r ach ievement of t he E qua l R ights Project is that it is an inst it ut ion t h at res ponded to t he needs of the lesbians and that it

there proudly and visibly, becoming a close colleague of California Supreme Court justices. No doubt knowing Donna, who is super re-

Leaders of the original Lesbian Rights Project which began in 1977. Front row: Donna Hitchens and Marian Chapman; back row: Teresa Friend, Pam Liberty, Linda Barr, and Roberta Achtenberg

K ate Kendel l: Donna and Ro b e r t a a r e s p e a k i n g m o d e s t l y.

What we were able to build on is what has been an animating feat u re si nce 19 9 4. A cha r acter i s tic, deeply embedded one around t h is quest ion: W ho is bei ng left b eh i nd ? L o ok i n g at t he ent i r e lesbian and gay community, with transgender issues still below the radar, looking at lesbian and gay concer n s a nd seei ng lesbia n i s sues were not being addressed at the national level and how lesbians were not benef itt ing. Youth, t r a n sgender people, elder s, i mm ig rants…A s t he LGBTQ commu n it y c ont i nue s t o move for ward, we a lways stop, look over our shoulders, and ask ourselves that question, “Who is being left behind?”

Don na H itchens: One t h ing that is very dif ferent now from the early days—For f ive or six years we were reactive. Now the organization is more proactive.

Kate Kendell: It is a real strength for any movement to go from a defensive to an offense position. We began saying we are entitled to the same rights, protection and secur it y that ever yone else takes for granted. On the docket we had cases that changed how LGBT people are treated. It became a national movement. Leadership has been a key factor, given the prof ile of our founders, of Roberta Achtenberg in the Clinton administration conf irmation hearings. A lso, Donna Hitchens transformed family court in San Francisco to a friendly and open one for lesbians. Her voice in the judiciary changed the perceptions of lesbians and gay people and their lives. Donna put herself out

sponsible, impacted their impressions of LGBT people and favorably affected cases involving them.

R o b e r t a A c h t e n b e r g : Ju d g e Mary Morgan was also a trailblazer, addressing early lesbian mother custody cases. She was the f irst lesbian appointed to the court. Donna Hitchens was the f irst elected lesbia n judge. From t he beg i nning, the Equal Rights Advocates collaborated w ith public interest groups doing work on civil rights a nd women’s issues. T h is was a progressive legal rights organization and that was not the position of the national gay movement.

Donna Hitchens: It was before the A IDS crisis and the awakening of men and women to pursue a joint destiny. We were dif ferent because our organization was collaborating w ith minorit y bar associations and other social justice groups.

Bay Times: W hat do you see in the future for NCLR? K a t e K e nde l l : W hen you a s k what’s t he most impor tant issue you have worked on, it’s hard to answer. Among them would be the wrongful death case with Sharon Smith in 2001 and also transforming custody cases. There are two tasks we are working on. First, as a lega l and pol icy organizat ion, winning and achieving formal legal equality and ending any legally sanctioned stigmatization.

The second is more dif f icult and e n d u r i n g. T h e c o m p a n i o n t o for ma l lega l equa lit y is w inning hearts and minds, reshaping this culture to come to a place of not just accept a nce, but embr ac i ng L GBT cu lt u re a nd u nder st a nd i n g t h at le s bi a n s a d d v a lue t o t his culture. These t wo go hand i n ha nd, a nd it’s a ch icken a nd eg g s it u at ion . I f you w i n leg a l batt les but do not add ress overall acceptance, there will still be pockets where people feel shame and are stigmatized. We therefor

always have our eyes on the culture piece. In fact, we are planning our own obsolescence in the next thirty to thirty-f ive years. I want to be gone in another twenty yea rs. To cha nge t he cu lt ure to such an extent that we can close ourselves down.

Roberta Achtenberg: We won’t be a lone. T here a re ot her s who wa nt to get beyond lega l equa lity. We have many colleagues who w i l l accompa ny us on t he journey and it is good to have “neighbor s .” Fa it h a nd v a lues g roups are among these and the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force and ot her orga n i zat ions t hat NCL R now works in coalition w ith. We are creating cultural change and unusual allies are showing up for us. From Obama to others, there’s an understanding we all are aski ng what k ind of count r y do we want to live in. There’s a v ision.

We have to be united and work together to achieve that vision. Now mor e t h a n e ver b efor e, we a r e work ing w it h organizat ions t hat include us in cross intersectional interesting work.

Bay Times: Do you have a favorite memory concerning your work with NCLR? Robe r t a Ac htenbe rg: Per sonally, it gave us our children. I am g r atef u l for a n i n st it ut ion t h at created a safe scene allowing us to parent our children. I wouldn’t be Benjie’s mother without the Equal Rights Project.

Donna Hitchens: I want to echo that one.

Kate Kendell: It is the quintessent ia l ver sion of “t he per sona l is pol it ica l.” W hen a sked, “ D id y ou a n d S a n d y g et m a r r i e d ? ” N C L R w a s s o i nvol v e d i n t he litigation, we didn’t. In 2008, we

did. A round “the w in,” our k ids told the story of how their school broke classes and had an assembly to celebrate. T hey were ecstat ic, and a lso because l icor ice red vines were handed out at the assembly! Another memory is repr es ent i n g Sh a r on Sm it h i n t he wrongful death dog mauling case.

Sharon is to this day a close friend in my life and of our family. These hallmarks are not just about making widgets. It’s the deepest kind of humanity and connection. I’ve felt blessed ever y day that I have worked for NCLR. Don na H itc hens: T h is is ver y personal work that we do because it touches our people and friends.

A memor y I have is the courage of those women in the early days who were willing to litigate their cases, r isk i ng t hei r fa m i ly relat ionsh ips, t heir jobs. T hey were incredibly courageous and didn’t go back in the closet.

Bay Times: W hat fuels NCL R? What is the real key to continuing its success?

Kate Kendell: None of the landma rk moment s or g reat work would be possible w ithout a l ineage of a ma zi ng st a f f who c a rr ied out and gave l ife to our v ision and our mission. These are folks who often could make a lot more money elsewhere but chose to dedicate their talents to truly ma k ing t he world better for our community. Their milestone cont r ibut ions wou ld not have been possible i n t ur n, w it hout our stead fa st donor s . From t he be g inn ing, NCL R’s work was sup ported solely by indiv iduals who shared our goals and vision. Even today, 75% of our funding comes from individual donors. While the leadership of NCL R is often the public face, we would be nowhere without our staf f and supporters.

When Women Take Off Their Fancy Dress After Spending An Evening At a Good Cause Be it tux and starch cascading silk chiffon silver high-heels patent leather evening pumps bowties or plunging Vs, cloth & smiles have history.

Remember, your grandmother, “Handsome is as handsome does.” Later, she confessed, “The stars are always with us but if you don’t leap & grasp, your hands, empty, Dear.”

Kit Kennedy, Bay Times Poet In Residence BAY T IM ES M AY 3, 2012 11

nn e y r ish Tu T y b o t Pho

NCLR Timeline: A Glance at History 19 77— L e s bi a n R i g ht s P r oje c t founded (re-named National Center for Lesbian Rights in 1989) 19 8 0 — N C L R w i n s v ictor y in Ca l ifor nia K reps , den ied a job Sherif f because of her entation

landmark for Denise a s C ou nt y sexual ori-

19 81— N C L R b r i n g s g r o u n d breaking case on behalf of a woman discharged from the National Guard solely for being a lesbian

19 8 7— NC L R w i n s one of t he f irst second-parent adoption cases in the country and begins promot i ng second-pa rent adopt ion as a legal strateg y for protecting same-sex parent families 1988—NCLR wins one of the nat ion’s f irst cour t custody batt les for a parent with A IDS on behalf of Artie Wallace, a gay dad whose son was kidnapped by his ex-wife

1985—NCLR represents two gay men in one of the f irst cases in the country to seek equal health benef its for same-sex partners

1993—NCLR is the f irst nationa l L GBT leg a l or g a n i zat ion to launch a g roundbrea k i ng advo cacy program on behalf of LGBT youth

1986 —NCL R represents A nn ie Aff leck and Rebecca Smith as they become one of the f irst same-sex couples to jointly adopt in the U.S.

19 9 4 —NCL R d r a mat ic a l ly exp a n d s it s a d v o c a c y o n b e h a l f of L GB T i m m i g r a nt s w it h t he launch of it s I m m ig rat ion P roj-

12 BAY TIMES MAY 3, 2012

ect, becom ing t he f irst nat iona l LGBT legal organization to do so 19 9 6 —NC L R represent s a les bian mother in Florida in a precedent- set t i ng c a se hold i ng t hat courts must not base custody decisions on stereot y pes about lesbian and gay parents 1999 —NCL R is the f irst LGBT leg a l or g a n i zat ion to l au nc h a permanent Elder Law Project as t he f i r st wave of baby boomer s become senior citizens 2000—In a powerful decision that adopts many of the arguments put for ward by NCL R in an amicus br ief, t he Nint h Circu it awards asylum to a gay man from Mexico and holds that sexual orientation is an immutable characteristic

20 01—NCL R becomes t he f irst nat iona l L GBT leg a l org a n i zation to launch a Transgender Law Project 2001—NCLR is the f irst national LGBT organization to tackle the rampant homophobia and transphobia in sports with the launch of its Sports Project 20 01—NCL R w i ns a la nd ma rk wrongful death lawsuit on behalf of Sharon Smith against the owners of two vicious dogs who killed Sharon’s life partner, Diane A lexis Whipple 2002—NCL R w ins a v ictor y on behalf of a lesbian mother in Mississippi who lost custody of her child to her former husband who had physica l ly abused a nd padlocked her in their home

20 02—NCL R represent s M ic h a e l K a nt a r a s , a t r a n sg ender dad in Florida, in a landmark custody and divorce case televised on Court TV 2003—NCL R litigates and w ins t he f irst school harassment case to involve bot h lesbia n a nd gay st udent s who were subjected to years of anti-lesbian and anti-gay harassment 20 05 —NCL R w ins t he f irst round of the California marriage battle when the San Francisco Superior Court rules that excluding same-sex couples from t he r ight to marr y v iolates the Ca lifornia Constitution 2 0 0 6 — NC L R s uc c e s s f u l l y de fends the marriage of a Cherokee

Photo by E li

zabeth Ma

ngelsdorf

Photo byTrish Tunney

Photo b yTr ish Tu

nn e y

lesbian couple before the Cherokee Supreme Court 2006—NCLR launches the Family Protection Project to improve access to family law ser v ices for low-i ncome, sa me-sex pa rent families, with a focus on ser ving families of color 2 0 0 7 — I n t h e f i r s t l aw s u it t o sh ine a publ ic spot l ight on perv a s ive homophobi a i n women’s sports, NCLR represents Jennifer Harr is, a for mer col lege basketball star, in a discrimination case a g a i n st Pen n St ate a nd for mer coach Rene Portland 2007—NCLR represents a gay couple in a landmark victory against an internet adoption business that discriminates against same-sex couples and single parents

2 0 0 7 — N C L R a n d C a l i fo r n i a Ru r a l L eg a l A s s i st a nce l au nch anot her f irst-of-its-k ind project, Proyecto Poderoso / Project Powerful, to improve legal ser vices for low-income LGBT farm workers and people in rural California 2 0 0 8 — N C L R i s l e a d c ou n s e l in the historic case in which the Ca l ifor nia Supreme Cour t r ules t he st ate ca n no longer exclude same-sex couples from marriage, includ ing hold ing t hat L GBT people are entitled to the highest level of constitutional protection, the f irst time any high court has ever done so 2008 —The day after passage of California’s Proposition 8, NCLR f i les a leg a l cha l lenge w it h t he California Supreme Court

20 09 —NCL R w i ns a ca se t hat establishes that Florida must give full faith and credit to all adopt ion s , i nc lud i n g s e c ond - pa r ent adopt ions, g ra nted to sa me- sex couples by other states 2 0 0 9 —NC L R’s L eg a l D i rector Sha nnon M i nter test i f ies i n t he f irst- ever cong ressiona l hear ing on gender identity discrimination 2 010 — N C L R r e pr e s e nt s C l ay Gr e ene, a n e lderly m a n for c e fully removed from the Northern Ca lifor nia home he shared w it h his long-time partner after he was hospita l ized, eventua l ly sett l ing the case for $600,000 2010 —NCLR wins U.S. Supreme Court case upholding the right of col leges a nd u n iver sit ies to en-

force non-discrimination policies that protect LGBT students 2011—NCLR client Vanessa Adams sett les w ith Federa l Bureau of P r i s on s , e s t a bl i s h i n g m ajor changes in t ransgender med ica l policy for those in federal facilities 2011—NCLR prevents state of f icials from separating and denying hea lt h ca re r ight s to a n elderly lesbian couple in rural Florida 2 011— NC L R s uc c e s s f u l l y s ett les a feder a l ca se on beha l f of t wo lesbia n h igh school sen ior s in M innesota, enabl ing t hem to walk together in “royalt y court” procession

faci ng u nspea k able d iscr i m i nation, harassment, and violence in their countries of origin 2011—NC L R d r a f t s com ment s on behalf of over 30 organizations successfu l ly persuad ing t he Department of Housing and Urban Development to i nc lude L GBT people and families in their housing benef its and programs 2 0 11 — N C L R c o n v i n c e s D e par tment of Hea lt h and Human Ser v ices to proh ibit a nt i-L GBT d iscr i m i nat ion i n t he new st ate healthcare exchanges 2012—NCLR’s 35th anniversary

2 011— N C L R w i n s 2 0 a s y lu m cases on behalf of LGBT people BAY T IM ES M AY 3, 2012 13

Why We Support NCLR What NCLR Means to Me

I have pol it ic a l i s sues w it h t he i n s t it ut ion of m a r r i a g e. W hen NC L R st a r ted to pu l l toget her the suit against the State of California, she knew Diane and I had not gotten married so she took the chance to ask us to be l it igants.

Kate knew that we believe in full human rights, no matter what our more complex questions are about the specif ic institution. I love the i rony of t he sit uat ion, a nd t hat Kate knew the depth of our political beliefs.

By Jewelle Gomez & Karen Williams What’s the ultimate challenge for a newspaper publ isher? Get t ing T WO busy act iv ists to w r ite an a r t ic le tog et her on a dead l i ne.

Well, that’s the task that was requested for this special insert to celebrate NCL R’s 30+ birthday, and who better to meet the challenge than San Francisco’s favorite author, poet, and play w r ight Jewelle Gomez and famous celesbian comic Karen Williams, who began performing comedy in the Bay Area in the early eighties.

We l l , e ve n publ i s her ’s d r e a m s come tr ue, even if t he for mat is Q& A. Enjoy!

W hat does NCLR mean to you?

Jewelle: NCLR is a fabulous example of lesbian feminism at work.

Thirty f ive years ago, some lesbians decided they would not stand for accepting the short end of the legal stick any more. Pooling their resources and their smarts, they created one of the most dynamic, successful and revered organizations in our community.

Lesbians know how to create institutions out of our activist impulses, and how to make the advances we produce for ourselves benef it the entire queer community.

ports the legal r ights of lesbians like NCLR. W h e n di d yo u s t a r t yo u r re lationship with the organization?

Jewel le: My spouse, Dia ne Sabi n, was co - cha i r of t he NCL R board t went y years ago and she asked me ( before we were pa r tner s) to be pa r t of a benef it for t he org a n i zat ion. At t he t i me I still lived in New York, so I was just lea r n i ng about NCL R . Her enthusiasm led me to learn more.

I c a me to u nder st a nd t h at a ny human r ights movement needs a legal strateg y for some issues as a crucial part of the work.

Karen: I remember having a leg a l problem on a job yea r s ago that reeked of sexual harassment and I wasn’t sure where to turn. I called NCLR to get some advice.

L i ke ma ny people, I wa s a fra id of “ le g a le s e ,” but I fou nd t he staf f at NCL R to be patient and k nowledgeable. NCL R is a v ita l com mu n it y org a n i zat ion whose r e put at ion i s f a r-r e a c h i n g. No organization that I know of sup-

Ka ren: I really don’t remember the f irst NCLR event I attended.

I ’ve been aw a re of t he or g a n izat ion for ma ny years and have had the opportunity to work with t h e m a s w e l l . I ’m a l w ay s i m pressed with their legal victories and the lives they’ve touched.

B. Scott Levine

tion ordinance in Dade Count y.

By cont rast, NCL R was for med that very same year and immediately began working hard to protect t he civ i l r ights of LGBT men and women and their families. It is now t h i r t y-f ive ye a r s later, and we still have to f ight for our equalit y. I a m g r a t e f u l t o NCL R for lead ing t he way. That’s why I support NCLR.

When I moved to San Francisco in 1979, NCLR had already been here act ively f ighiing for LGBT r ight s. I moved here f rom t he E a st C oa st to at tend t he Un iver s it y of Sa n Fr a ncisco School of L aw.

I cou ld have gone to l aw s c ho o l i n ot he r areas of t he countr y.

But I chose to come to t he Bay A rea, because I knew that the burgeoning gay rights movement was f lourishing in San Francisco. A few years earlier, I lived and went to high school in F lor ida. I n 1977, A n it a Br ya nt had won her insidious campaign to repeal a gay anti-discr iminaHelene Wenzel That’s an easy question with an easy answer. I support NCLR because NCLR supports me. And you.

And her. And them. I first heard about NCLR what seems l ike eons ago when I was…well, younger. As time passed and I matured, so did NCL R . W h i le I had been a card-carr y ing member for many years, I really only became an active supporter after 1999 when, responding to the “suggestion” made by Del Martin and Phyllis Lyon, NCLR created its Elder Law Project, the nation’s premier organization focused on the needs and concerns of our aging population.

14 BAY TIMES MAY 3, 2012

W hat se r vices does NCL R offer that make it a unique organization?

An attorney in private practice based in Oakland, S cott L e vine spec ializes in bu s iness law, real estate, estate planning , litigation and domestic partner issues. He has more than twenty years experience practicing law.

With the Project, NCLR opened its doors w ide to a ver y specia l population that could have been forgotten. And by doing so, it acknowledged the LGBT life cycle: from g roundbrea k ing work on issues of lesbians and children, to t he s pec i a l concer n s of a g i n g , lon g t er m care, and end of life for LGBT elders. T han k you, NCLR, for being so inclusive!

Hel e ne V. We nzel i s an elder law and estate planning attorney. She is pastPresident of the Northern California chapt e r of th e Nat ional Aca de my of Elder Law Attorneys (NAEL A).

Jewel le: I won’t t a l k about t he services since they’re on the website (www.nclrights.org). But what is rea l ly un ique about NCL R is the passion and personal investment that the staf f brings to their cl ient s. It’s about bei ng pa r t of a hu m a n r i ght s movement a nd t h at i s i n s pi r i ng for t hose who f ind themselves on the legal front l i nes. It’s not about a ca se; it’s about people’s l ives, and NCL R meet s t hem where t hei r hu ma n needs are.

K a r e n: I k new K ate’s pa r t ner, Sandy Holmes, before I met Kate.

Sandy and I were good friends of another amazing activist, Margaret Sloan Hunter. I love Sandy and Kate as a couple and as a family because I feel that it adds another dimension to their activism. Kate Kendell is charming, intelligent, passionate, committed, f illed with energy, and very outspoken. When I’ve met with Kate or lunched with her, I am always impressed by how k nowle d g e able s he i s a nd how much the “persona l is polit ica l” for her. I bel ieve t hat NCL R is what it is today because of Kate’s “pull no punches” leadership. We can all learn something from her example.

K a r e n : I a g r e e w it h J e w e l l e .

W hen I t h i n k of NC L R , I s e e w a r m , f r iend ly, c ompa s s ion at e faces a nd hea r t s i n f used w it h a c om m it ment t o ju s t ic e. T h at ’s powerful!

A l s o, s he k now s g o o d c ome d y when she hears it.

We c a n’ t t a l k a b o u t N C L R without mentioning Kate Kendell! Tell us a little about your relationship with Kate.

Jewelle: NCLR is the product of t he persistence and ingenuit y of lesbian fem in ism. It has worked cases of all types with clients from all of of the initials. Kate is smart, good-looking and political. What else do we need to know?

Jewe l le: K ate ha s been a fa mi ly fr iend since Diane and I got together twenty years ago. I interviewed her for an article for Ms. Magazine about mar r iage equa lity. Kate knew that as a feminist, Kelly McCown Because Kate Kendell rocks. Seriously, though, I support NCLR because it is constantly breaking new ground and f ighti ng for t he most v u lner a ble i n ou r c om munit y. W hen NCL R st a r ted 35 yea r s ago, i t s w o r k fo c u s e d o n discrimination against le s bi a n s , who at t he t ime were losing custody of their children in family courts.

T h e o r g a n i z a t i o n ’s work has expanded now to include every important civil rights issue af fecting our community, such as representing an elderly gay man in Sonoma County who was separated from his ailing partner and not a l lowed to ma ke med ica l or Tamika La K ae Bulter We can a l l ag ree t hat for many of us things are better than they were 35 years ago. But the truth is people still keep who they are and who they love a secret around coworkers.

K id s a r e s t i l l lo s i n g t heir l ives far too often to bullying. That is why the National Center for Lesbian R ights is so important. NCLR is this shining beacon of light that tells all of us it’s okay for others to know who we are.

POP ROX

By K. Cole

MARTINE LOCKE “Live” I first met this bouncing crazy Australian years ago on stage, and by the sounds of this release, she’s still providing fresh entertainment for a too-oft boring womyn’s acoustic scene. Like a breath of fresh air, Martine pulls out all the stops, literally stomping on multiple pedals, to create new colors, while her witty banter and winning smile continues to spread the love.

Although the recording quality leaves something to be desired, this live album recreates an accurate picture of one of the best touring artists of the Generation X’ers. Best Cut: “I See Your Eyes” Location: Dolores Park Café, of course!

Na m e t h r e e t h i n gs t h a t yo u want everyone to know about NCLR

Karen: Ditto!

Copyright 2012. All Rights Reserved. f ina ncia l decisions for h i m, despite hav ing a l l of the lega l and me d ic a l p ower s of at t or ne y i n pl a c e. O r he lpi n g t r a n s g ender women secure med ica l ly neces sa r y t reat ment wh i le i n s t at e c u s t o d y. O r wor k i n g w it h L GB T immigrants from around the world who are seek ing asylum to escape persecut ion in their home countries.

NCL R won’t rest until it has won full civil and human r ights for everyone in the LGBT community, including those who have no one else to speak up for them.

Kelly McCown Attorney at Law Certif ied Specialist in Immigration and Nationality Law Having an organization out there f ighting for my rights as a young, queer, black woman...an organizat ion t hat represents me and values me...an org a n i zat ion t hat ha s b e en f i ght i n g for me for 35 yea r s a nd w i l l c ont i nue t o f i g ht for me until the battle for equality is won. That’s k now i n g t h at I don’t have to keep a secret.

T hat’s being comfor table i n my ow n s k i n.

That’s the power of

NCLR.

VICKI RANDLE “Sleep City” Yes, I know. This came out in 2006. That’s the point of this review. Vicki, Vicki! You in there?!? This was a stellar first release from the side woman America saw every night on Jay Leno for many, many years.

Although she honed these songs over many years involved with projects from the early Olivia Records days, Kenny Loggins, and then late night television, her longtime fans were finally rewarded with a full-length release and celebration. Honored at NCLR a few years ago, we hoped she would continue the love but after six long years, we’re WAY overdue for more, don’t you think? Best Cut: “Don’t Let Me Fall” Location: On the Land

JANE LYNCH “Glee Theme Song” Oh Jane! We love you so, and this performance on SNL ruled as she wrote a tequila-inspired theme song for Glee gang saying Sue Sylvester is the star of the show and parts ‘the sea of the halls’ then breaks into a rock anthem Patti Smith would love and the shows producers would hate. Why the weekly releases from the money moguls at Fox don’t include this rendition, well, I guess ‘cause they didn’t get the license from Ms. Lynch. Jane is honored at this year’s NCLR dinner, so perhaps I’ll ask her when the full-length album comes out?

Best Cut: “I’m Sue Sylvester” Location: Anywhere you need a little pick me up!

INDIGO GIRLS “Beauty Queen Sister” Of course, the quality of Emily and Amy’s work cannot be denied and twenty years taking on political change, women’s issues, global communities and touring incessantly does something to the soul and the chops, that’s for sure. Although I wanted to rave about this new release, I found it unsettlingly uneven, running from classic Americana to polished pop productions, almost as if the girls are showing their age a bit. I suggest a radical infusion of raw power that blasted us in the early days might shake loose the sense of complacency that can strangle even the most conscientious mature musician (see Bonnie Raitt’s new release). Best Cut: “Feed and Water the Horses” Location: Dyke March, early in the afternoon

Arts&Entertainment Harry Hay, Radically Gay, On Display at Main Library Art

Sister Dana Van Iquity H a r r y H ay ’s rema rk able l i fe i s on d isplay at t he M a i n L ibra r y mark ing the hundredth anniversary of his birth. “Radically Gay: the Life of Harry Hay” celebrates the activist who laid the foundat ion for the moder n lesbian and g ay r ight s movement . T h i s exh ibit ion, gorgeously curated by Joey Cain, explores the life, ideas and contributions of Hay. Drawing upon original papers, ephemera, v ideos a nd per sona l items, the epic stor y of this compelling and complex civil rights leader is brought to life. It’s fay! It’s gay!

It’s totally Hay! T he H ay ent hu s i a st i s a l so encouraged to check out Hope along the Wind: the Life of Harry Hay in t he Koret aud itor iu m, Ju ne 13, 6pm, and “ W hich Side A re You O n? ” for u m at Kor et , Ju ly 11, 6pm.

Entering the venue, to the left begins one’s journey with photos of baby Har r y, h is mot her Margaret Kneall Hay, his father Henry Hay, and Aunt Kate. A variety of childhood and teenage experiences cont r ibuted to Hay’s d ist inct mindset and personalit y. A br utal, authoritarian father, a distant mother who nurtured a love of the ar ts and a lov ing aunt were t he members of h is immed iate fami ly. A photo of Hay at 16 shows him joining the ROTC to avoid

taking g ym class. His high school yearbook is fascinat ing because he l isted n i ne st udent s he k new were gay and who died of suicide or were murdered.

The Mattachine Societ y sect ion (19 4 8 - 53) shows t he foundat ion as a legal entity as a front for illegal homosexual gatherings. Hay’s mot her a nd severa l ot her members’ mothers f iled papers under t h a t c o d e n a me. H ay a nd t he M at t a ch i ne S oc iet y dec ided to coin the term “homophile” rather than use the clinical and usually d a m n i n g t er m , “ homo s e x u a l .”

Margaret’s tea set, prom inent ly on display, was always used duri ng t he meet i ng s of t he Societ y (his mother had spent some time abroad in Britain and picked up the elegant habit of having teas).

“A Drea m Defer red” i l lust rates a sad par t of Hay’s life. He had br ie f l y jo i ne d t he C om mu n i s t Party in 1934, dropped out, and rejoined in 1938. Ten years later he was outed as a Communist a long w it h so ma ny ot her good people hunted dow n dur i ng t he dreaded Red Scare and McC a r t hy i s m . I n 19 55 , H ay w a s summoned to appear before t he House Committee on Un-American Activates. A s a result of the witchhunts, the Mattachine Society broke down as did Hay himself. Membersh ip numbers went into a rapid decline. It would be si xteen yea r s before t he energ y a n d l a r g e - s c a l e or g a n i z i n g o f the or ig ina l Mattachine Societ y was to be embraced again in the

post- Stonewa l l lesbia n a nd g ay movements.

Jor n K a mg ren, a f led gl i ng h at de s i g ner, c a me i nt o H ay ’s l i fe i n 19 52 a f t er H a r r y a nd Rud i G er n reich broke up. A Da n i sh i m m ig ra nt , K a mg ren was emo t iona l ly t roubled by h is fat her’s suicide and his exper iences as a child dur ing World War I I. Kamgren and Hay lived together for 11 troubled years, Kamgren discouraging Hay’s activism.

I n t he C i r c le of L ov i n g C om pa n ion s , 19 6 3 -78 , we s e e H ay founded this group with his new b oy f r iend , Joh n Bu r n s ide. Not all were as open as the pair who were involved in such homophile movement ef forts as The Council on Religion and the Homosexual a nd t he Nor t h A mer ic a n C on ference of Homophile Organizations. Sometimes the two were the only members, forced to carry on their activism alone.

A glass case in the center holds a bizarre invention of kaleidoscope producer Burnside, the Symmetricon, which projected a kaleidoscopic image out onto a screen.

Hay and Burnside promoted it to the f ilm and TV industry, an exa mple of one used bei ng i n t he sci-f i L ogan’s Run . T he Sy mmetr icon wa s a l so u sed i n t her apy to i nduce a t ra nce st ate, wh ich reminded me of t he psychedel ic light shows of yore. (continued on page 17

The Perfect Family Is Far from Perfect Film

Gary M. Kramer A modestly made—and modestly af fect ing — comedy-drama about acceptance, T he Perfect Family concerns Eileen Cleary (Kathleen Tur ner) v y ing for t he “Cat hol ic Woman of the Year” award at her

chu rch. E i leen i s cer t a i n ly de vout—attending daily mass—and devoted to helpi ng out del ivering food to the homebound. But, a s t he f i l m event u a l ly r evea l s , she has more than a few reasons to want the absolution the award includes.

a n ex-a lcohol ic. Her son Fra n k Jr., ( Ja s on R it t e r) h a s le f t h i s w ife, and taken up w ith another woman. And her daughter Shannon ( Em i ly Deschanel) d rops t he bombs hel l at a celebr ator y dinner that she is both a lesbian and pregnant.

E i leen’s fa m i ly i s , no su r pr i se, far from “per fect.” Her husband Fra n k ( M ichael McGrady) is

The f ilm’s humor stems from the fact that Eileen must present her “honest, faithful, Catholic” family to the award committee, which includes the Archbishop of Dubl in— and she has to l ie to do it.

Few of these paradoxes are funny.

Even an early scene in which Eileen tries to hide a mishap she has w it h t he c om mu n ion w a fer s — sweepi ng t hem under t he t able, and eating them later —is broadly played and barely amusing.

Much of the characters and situations in T he Perfect Family are as superf icial as a sitcom. During a big meet ing w ith the Monsig nor (Richard Chamberlain), Frank Jr., shows up drunk and shouts about his sister’s “turkey-baster baby,” before he’s taken away to save the family from being ashamed.

E i leen w a nt s her hu sba nd a nd children to “behave the way they

are supposed to.” What she does not w a nt to do i s a c k nowled ge why this is so dif f icult for them.

Sh a n non’s stor yl i ne, wh ic h i n volves dif f iculties w ith her pregn a n c y, i s t h e d r a m a t i c — a n d best—part of the f ilm. One scene in which Eileen tr ies to come to ter m s w it h Sha n non’s rel at ionship with Angela (Angelique Cabra l) i nvolves her a sk i ng A nge la’s mother, Christina (Elizabeth Peña), “How do you accept it? ” Christina’s response is both sensible and sensitive.

L ikew ise, when Ei leen confesses to her daughter t hat she sig ned a petition—initiated by her rival for t he church’s award— aga inst gay adoption, it prompts a candid conversation between mother and daughter about the issue. “What do you think?” Shannon asks angrily, trying to get at her mother’s tr ue feelings on the topic of gay parents. “I don’t have to think!” her mother responds, hiding behind her faith.

While the f ilm never reveals if Eileen felt pressured to sign the document, or actually believes in its pol ic y, such a mbig u it y prevent s

T he Pe r fect Fa mily from creat i ng t h r e e - d i me n s io n a l c h a r a c t e r s .

St i l l , t he f i l m cou ld h ave u sed more eng a g i ng scenes l i ke t h i s one. Instead, there are slapstick-y moments involving Eileen having an adverse react ion at Shannon and Angela’s wedding ceremony.

T he Perfect Family is all about getting Eileen to change, instead of her family. She slowly but uneasily, tries to accept her daughter’s l i fe a nd lover, a nd she ma n ipulates her son’s new girlfriend from seeing him. She also tries to keep her own marital tensions at bay.

That Eileen is unable to do these things ef fectively drives her to admit her ow n mista kes and quest ion her f a it h . She e ven meet s with a priest who gives her a fresh perspective on her situation. But t he f i l m never creates a ny rea l emotional depth for Eileen’s crisis.

T h i s i s not K at h le en Tu r ner ’s fault, as the actress gives a canny performance. At times she seems to be overacting —trying too hard to pl ay up E i leen’s pos it ive fa çade. Yet Tur ner’s per for ma nce is actua l ly a deft ba lancing act; (continued on page 17) BAY T IM ES M AY 3, 2012 15

Around About

Emcee Donna Sachet with Shanti’s Dausik Roy and event co-chairs Leticia Galyean and Kimberly Snyder at the Speakeasy Cocktail Celebration held at the Old Mint. Photo by Rink.

Cmdr Zoe Dunning announced her DCCC candidacy during a fundraiser held at Lime on Friday, April 27th. Photo by Rink.

State Senator Mark Leno is surrounded by young supporters at Trigger during a fundraiser.

Photo by Steven Underhill Writer Ernesto Martinez and his mom with Lambda’s Tony Valenzuela at the Lambda Literary Award Finalists Reading at the SF Main Library.

Photo by Rink.

The cast of “Corpus Christi” in front of the Castro Theatre before the preview showing on April 28th.

Photo by Steven Underhill 16 BAY TIMES MAY 3, 2012

Actress Judy Davis at the Castro Theatre for a screening of Eye of the Storm. Photo by Steven Underhill

Nurture What You Know to Be True ARIES (March 21 – April 19) Revisit your commitments, Aries. Evaluate the give-and-take dynamic in your central relationships. Are you primarily the giver or taker? Others look to you for guidance now. Think before you speak.

LEO (July 23 – August 22) You're working diligently to invent useful ideas.

Remember that true growth happens when you venture “outside the box,” Leo. Experience the rush of reaching beyond your comfort zone.

SAGITTARIUS (November 22 – December 21) Reconsider your role in the tribe, Sagittarius. Are you acting with inspiration? Collaborate with like minds in your community to achieve what you most desire. It takes a village.

VIRGO (August 23 – September 22) A myriad of potential career opportunities surrounds you now, Virgo. Purge obstructions in your flow of creativity, and invest stock in what matters most. The right path will reveal itself.

CAPRICORN (December 22 – January 19) As you track inventory of past career accomplishments, remember that hindsight is 20/20. Careful, Capricorn. You'll strain your neck and miss the fun if you keep looking backward. Be present.

LIBRA (September 23 – October 22) Modify a workable wellness regime to meet your specific needs. While your consideration for others is commendable, you must also prioritize inner balance. Communicate your desires to close partners.

AQUARIUS (January 20 – February 18) Your beliefs are evolving, Aquarius. Certain restrictions may appear to censor you, but these boundaries can actually help you focus energy on what truly uplifts your spirit. Make heart-centered decisions.

better.

TAURUS (April 20 – May 20) It's time to regenerate your belief system, Taurus.

Kick-start your heart and soul by improving health habits and creating more useful forms of self-expression. Draw inspiration from your community.

Astrology Gypsy Love Self worth is sadly often measured by what we have versus who we are. We're conditioned to believe that acquiring more possessions makes us more deserving of joy. We look outside ourselves for abundance that already lives within our hearts. Astro-rhythms compel us now to reexamine our values. Open your treasure chest of talents. Polish your personal gems. Earn lasting security by nurturing what you already know to be true.

www.AstrologyByGypsyLove.com

GEMINI (May 21 – June 20) As the zodiac's social butterfly, you are never lacking in the entertainment department. Try focusing your perspective inward, Gemini. Explore the excitement of your own uniqueness. Turn yourself on.

CANCER (June 21 – July 22) Now's a fantastic time to cultivate your roots, Cancer. Graciously cherish the soil from whence you came, and liberate from whatever toxins prevent your proverbial blossoms from blooming.

SCORPIO (October 23 – November 21) You're clearing some spiritual blockages, Scorpio.

Unfinished matters of the heart that once lingered deep inside your subconscious have now surfaced. Create a peaceful sanctuary to confront hidden fears.

PISCES (February 19 – March 20) Activate your special abilities, Pisces. Master the magnificence of your mystical nature, transcending the mundane limits of what “should” be. Investigate the exciting possibilities of what “could” be.

Gypsy Love’s astrology readings have helped 1000’s of people attract what they authentically desire.

It’s Hysterical!! San Francisco’s New Museum notorious and yes legendary Good Vibrat ions opened T he A nt ique V ibr ator Museu m at t hei r Pol k Street store location. Just walk in, manage to get past all the goodies and go to the back room (ooh la la).

Love, Life, Sex Shar Rednour Move over Smithsonian! There’s a new museum to wr ite home to mommy about. Mistress Mommy that is. San Francisco’s beloved,

A lready creat ing a st ir, or sha l l we say a nat iona l v ibe, some of t he a nt ique v ibr ator s f rom t he t ur n of t he centur y can be seen in the new f ilm Hysteria, a major Holly wood f ilm starring Magg ie Gyllenhaal and Rupert Everett in a Victorian-era romantic comedy set around the creation of the vibrator with Good Vibrations co-

presenting the premiere last week as a part of the S.F. International Film Festival. And the movie title has it right—vibrators were promoted as cures for women’s hyster ia in decades gone by. W hen you visit the museum, take notice of the happy, pleasured women on the v intage product’s packag ing.

“Sex Sells” isn’t just a new notion after all.

G ood V ibr at ions fou nder Joa n i Bl a n k st a r ted her v i nt a g e v ibe col lect ion decades ago w it h t he stores housing them in loving cases. But they never had one home of their own, with the glamorous

d i s pl ay s d e s er v i n g of mu s eu m a r t i fact s, a nd now t hey do. GV st a f f s exolog i st a nd fou nder of The Center for Sex and Culture, Dr. Ca rol Queen (a nd a col lect or her s e l f ) e x pl a i n s , “ We a r e delighted to showcase our collect ion in a dy namic, histor ic, and enter ta ining d isplay at our Pol k St reet ret a i l locat ion. T he new exhibit contextualizes the v ibrators’ role in society and highlights how our attitudes around sex and female pleasure have evolved. It really gives us an appreciation for how far both society and technolog y h ave come, a nd it’s f it t i ng to house the exhibit in the origi-

As Heard on the Street . . .

na l fema le-f r iend ly adu lt ret a i l store.”

Ta l k about a “Night at t he Museum!” You might, however, want something a little more up to date for your own adult toys. No worr ies — t he new model s st i l l cu re what ails you.

For more info visit: antiquevibratormuseum.com In Person Hours Friday & Saturday: 10:00 am - 10:00 pm Sunday - T hur sday: 10:0 0 a m 9:0 0 pm 1620 Pol k St reet , Sa n Francisco, CA 94109

compiled by Rink

ALL PHOTO S BY RI NK

What do you have planned for Cinco de Mayo?

Troy Brunet

Kathleen

Gary Virginia

Raoul Thomas

“I am planning a Miss Heart Throb Contest.”

“I am going to Marlena's for the party.”

“We are having a party here at Cafe Flore!”

“I am having a holiday celebration sidewalk sale.”

(HARRY HAY continued from page 15) In the mid-seventies for a decade, Hay and Burnside had a very successful kaleidoscope business and organized gay liberat ion act ions in San Juan Pueblo, New Mexico.

Around this time, Jonathan Katz interviewed them for his groundbreaking book, Gay American Hist o r y. T he Stonew a l l g ener at ion red iscovered Hay a nd Bur nside through the amazing Word Is Out documentary.

(FAMILY continued from page 15) The dream is rebor n 1979 -20 02 w hen t he R a d ic a l Fa er ie s w a s formed of likeminded people livi ng i n a com mu n it y st r ug gl i n g for social justice. Many moved to San Francisco, and a photo shows some of h is g roup from back i n the Mattachine Society (depicted in a large photo at the very back wall) as compared to a relatively recent one in 1998 of those same friends, Dale Jennings, Jim Gruber, and Konrad Stevens.

Br i n g i n g t he ex h ibit a l most to its end is the section with Hay as Grand Marshal in the 1999 San Fr a nc i sco L GBT P r ide Pa r ade.

The last piece of histor y and the end of the tour is the obituary of Hay, 1912-2002.

T h is massive, impressive ex h ib it w i l l be on v iew i n t he M a i n L i br a r y ’s Je w et t G a l le r y, now through July 29.

Eileen is hiding an obvious dark t r ut h u nder neat h, a nd when it comes to l i ght , it ex pl a i n s her guilt and motivations. Moreover, her cha r acter’s response at t he award ceremony, is appropriate, and prov ides a nice redempt ion for a character that is often unlikable, but never unsympathetic.

In support, Emily Deschanel does a f i ne job a s Sha n non, hold i ng her own against Turner in many

of t he mot her- daughter confront at ions. Out actor R icha rd Chamberlain, however, is wasted in his role as the Monsignor. He is given too little to do.

A lt hough it add resses some i nteresting themes regarding faith, family, and sexuality, T he Perfect Family is mostly f lawed. © 2012 Gary M. Kramer

BAY T IM ES M AY 3, 2012 17

P HOTO C O URT E SY O F K AT H LE E N AR C H AMBE AU

Spreading the Love of Reading

Inspiring LGBTQ Prof iles Kathleen Archambeau Author Page Hodel with Luann Stauss at Laurel Book Store

L ua n n St auss had a d rea m t hat she made come true in Oakland.

She opened Laurel Book Store at 410 0 Mac A r t hu r Blvd. just fou r days after 9/11/2001. Stauss is now entering her eleventh year in business. The mission of her independent bookstore: Spreading the love of reading , person to person.

A nd t his Apr. 23 rd 2012, Laurel Book Store joined t he f irst U. S. b o o k g i v e a w a y, s p o n s o r e d b y World Book Night. This year, over 25,000 volunteers participated in t he 500,000 book g iveaway. T he g rass root s ef for t , sponsored by authors, publishers, librarians and independent booksellers, chose 30 titles and gave away books in lots of 20 to schools, nursing homes, community centers and, yes, even g rocer y stores in an effort to get good books into the hands of reluct a nt or u nderser ved readers.

The authors – from K haled Hosseini to Maya A ngelou, from Junot Díaz to Marily nne Robinson – donated rights. The publishers pr inted World Book Night 2012 c o p i e s fo r b r o a d d i s t r i b u t i o n .

My 2 0 copies of I Know W hy the

Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou went to t he Edna Brewer Middle School in Oakland, where middle school readers w ill be t reated to a free book. The school boasts a population that includes 36% A fr ica n A mer ica n a nd 16% L at ino students.

Unlike ma ny bookstores, L aurel Book Store has an extensive LG BTQ section and a comprehensive ch i ld ren’s sect ion. A s more a nd more L GBTQ people a re st a r ting families – it is estimated that 2 million children are growing up in LGBTQ families – the need for forward-thinking children’s books h a s never b een g rea t er. L au rel Book Store add resses t hat need w it h an on-staff children’s literat ure exper t a nd children’s stor ytelling events and activities. They also sponsor local author readings and book groups.

St auss d id not w a ke up one day a nd decide to open a bookstore.

Having worked 20 years in bookselling with an independent chain, Wa ldenbooks a nd for Scholast ic

Book Fairs, Stauss knew what she was getting into and did it any way.

As with all big dreams, there have been many stumbling blocks along the way, not the least of which is t he explosion of E -Readers. Fortunately, the A merican Booksellers A ssociat ion tea med up w it h Google and can offer independent booksellers a delivery mechanism for get t i ng e - book s out to t hei r customers.

The one thing independent books el l e r s h ave t h a t A m a z o n . co m a nd ot her cha i ns lack is a love of b o ok s . G oi n g i nt o t he L au rel Book Store on any given day, Luann is t here to discuss t he rerelease of L esbia n w r iter E m ma Donoghue’s classic, Hood , or t he success of Lesbian Pulitzer Prizewinning poet Kay Ryan’s T he Best of It or the popularity of Armistead Maupin’s series, Tales of the City.

She can discuss the books because she’s read t hem a nd ca n tell you about a new book that you might like to read based on your book selection. Now that’s spreading the love of reading, person to person.

Drifting Toward Peace

Review Kirsten Kruse R a c hel M a ddow, me d i a pu nd it a nd aut hor, recent ly v isit ed t he Bay A rea wh i le on a book tou r for Drift: T he Unmooring of America n M ilit ar y Powe r. I n t he book , she describes in her unmistakably witty and sarcastic style why it has become much too easy for the US to go to and stay at war.

Maddow insists the framers of the const it ut ion i ntended t he US to be peaceable. War was supposed to be painful to the people of this cou nt r y, so we wou ld avoid it .

“The reason the founders chafed at the idea of an American standing army and vested the power of w a r ma k i ng i n t he cu mbersome leg islat u re w a s not to d isadva n t a ge us a g a i nst f ut u re enem ies, but to disincline us toward war as a genera l mat ter.” Cong ress had the power to declare war, not the president , a nd t he people t hem selves, not a standing army, would 18 BAY TIMES MAY 3, 2012

f ight . It ’s not like t hat a ny more, and Maddow explains why.

so old that we have actually forgotten how to fix them.

Reaching back to t he days of t he V ie t n a m Wa r, M a ddow de t a i l s how president s have one by one t h row n of f a l l of t he caut iona r y mea su res i mposed by t he f r a m ers t hat prevented easy war maki n g. To d ay, C on g res s h a s b een d ropped from t he w a r decision ma k i n g process, a nd t he P resi dency has been super-empowered with total war making power. Most of t he people a re insulated from t he ef fect s of wa r because a relat ively sma l l a mou nt of sold iers is repeated ly deployed a nd sup ported by huge numbers of private contractors. The CI A and Special Forces conduct militar y missions in secret , account able to no one but the President, and we don’t see casket s or even injured soldiers.

So, st ay i ng at w a r is easy, much too easy.

Maddow does not t a ke sides. I f you hate Reaga n, you’ll love her stories about his blatant lies about com mu n i s t s w a i t i n g for a f i r s t st rike; if you love Clinton, you’ll be disillusioned by his embracing t he privat izat ion of t he milit a r y; if you think Obama is a hero for catching bin Laden, you’ll be disappointed by his use of drones in Pakistan.

D r if t is a lso f u l l of fa sci nat i n g, eye-opening detail about what rea l ly happ ened du r i n g t he I r a n C ont ra a f fa i r, how Rea g a n used G ren a d a t o m a ke h i m sel f lo ok g o o d , h ow m e r c e n a r y s u b c o n t ractors like Ha llibur ton rose to power u nder Bush, how Cl i nton managed to support the Bosnians and Croats, and how many moldy nuclear warheads are still pointing at inv isible enemies. Her sna rky chapter on the nukes is very entertaining – our military has actually lost 11 warheads (one just slid off an aircraft carrier into the ocean somewhere nea r Japa n, a not her fell into a swamp in North Caro lina), and some of these bombs are

You may finish the book shaking you r head i n hopeless d isbel ief.

But Maddow ends w it h pract ical, down-to-earth suggestions on how reverse the “drift” and how to rei nvent t he idea t hat ou r cou nt r y ca n w a ge p eace i nst ead of w a r.

A f t e r a l l , s h e s ay s , t h a t ’s n o t only our inheritance, but also our responsibility.

Historically speaking, the Bay Times began in 1979 as a Calendar for the LGBTQ community. The title was Coming Up!

See many more Calendar items @ www.sfbaytimes.com

compiled by Manny Apolonio

The Odyssey on Angel Island. Premieres Saturday, May 12. Photo Courtesy of www.weplayers.org

CLASSIFIEDS

The Song of Achilles – SF Public Library. Free. 6:30pm. (100 Larkin St.) www.sfpl.org. Madeline Miller retells the story of the Trojan War in this compelling tale of Achilles and his underdog companion Patroclus.

Hormel Gay and Lesbian Center Reading Room.

Business Opportunities Graphic & Web Designer www.imagineit-design.com lori.au3@gmail.com

Catering

Gloria Swanson- Personal Chef, Cooking Demonstrations. Call 415.552.3232 to discuss your next menu! www.chefforhiresf.com, glofriasws@aol.com

Ladies Night – Café Flore. Free.

5pm. (2298 Market St.) www.cafeflore.com. www.bettyslist.com. Enjoy delicious food, Stoli drink specials and great company in the Castro.

Indoor & outdoor seating. Hosted by “Betty’s List” with DJ Flirty G. Judea Eden Band – El Rio. Free.

6:30pm to 10pm. (3158 Mission St.) www.elriosf.com. Audry and Fran host Casino games while Amy Meyers plays and sings familiar songs from all eras on the piano.

5th Annual Lesbian Summer Camp – Pinnacles National Monument. $50. (Paicines, CA) Info and RSVP: jamyrson@hotmail.com.

A fun weekend of women, camping, hiking, playing in the swimming pool, and music by the campfire.

4th Annual RADAR Benefit – Verdi Club. $15. 7pm. (2424 Mariposa St.) www.radarproductions.org. A live art auction hosted

by Ali Liebegott and Michelle Tea. With works by Paul Madonna, Maira Kalman, Amanda Kirkhuff and more.

The Uncomfortable Zones of Fun – Temescal Art Center.

Free. 8pm. (511 48th St., Oakland) www.eroplay.com. Frank Moore, world-known shaman performance artist, will conduct improvised passions of musicians, actors, and

Dating Service

New Free Dating Website.

SameSexConnections.com

Financing

The Annual SF Cinco de Mayo Festival, Saturday, May 5. Photo courtesy of www.sfcincodemayo.com dancers to create altered realities 2012 anniversary. The lesbian party of fusion beyond taboos. of the year, featuring Kate Kendell, Kate Clinton, Jane Lynch and more.

NCLR 35th Anniversary Party - Metreon City View. $90.

8:00 PM – Midnight. (4th and Mission Street) www.nclrights.org/

Ladies Go Biking – Cinco de Mayo Ride. No pressure beginner road ride. Details: Adriennebettyslistcycling@comcast.net. On Facebook, see “Ladies Go Biking.”

BLISS Silver Anniversary Gala – W Hotel. $150. 6pm to 11pm. (181 3rd St.) www.maitrisf. org. A fabulous fund-raising gala with cocktails, silent auction and fashion show. MC Carmen Marc Valvo and Donna Sachet.

Swimwear for a Cause – Phoenix Hotel. $50-$500. 4pm to 7pm. (601 Eddy St.) www.projectinform.org. Enjoy poolside cocktails and men’s swimwear fashion show. Proceeds benefit Project Inform.

Andy Cohen will be at the Castro Theatre on Wednesday, May 16. Photo by Virginia Sherwood/Bravo

Is a Reverse Mortgage for You? Are you at least 62 years of age and own your home? Get paid a monthly amount, line of credit or a lump sum payment.You always retain full ownership. Call Lauren Dunlap, Nova Mortgage. (510) 540-7911 / (415) 7532272.

Insurance

COVER YOUR ASSETS: Insurance for YOUR community. Life, Disability, Final Expense. Aaron Van Arsdale 415-717-4984. aaron.insure@gmail. com. Life Agent Lic # 0G10774

athletic, attractive, and descend from two loving and long-lived Spanish families. www.gayfamilyoptions.com item /221

Pets

SURF DOG large dog boarding at Ocean Beach. Queer Owned. sfsurfdogs.com. (415) 637-7717 DOG TRAINING in Your Home Cindy Gehring, Dog Trainer 408-238-1540, DogHelpNow@gmail. com, www.cindygehring.com

Self Defense

Soko Joshi Judo & Self Defense Club for Women. 415-821-0303 phdshelley@sbcglobal.net

Tax Preparation

The Lesbian Tax Mom 510-653-4323 taxmomsusan@yahoo.com

Therapy

Experienced Psychologist - LGBTQ Issues - Castro - Sliding Scale - Diana Gray, PhD (PSY10607) 415-309-4729

Barbara A. Adler, LMFT. Psychotherapy- ConsultationEducation- Training. barbaraadlerLMFT.com, 415-990-9137.

Legal Services

Gay-Latino Fiction

B. Scott Levine 510-763-2300 bscottlevine@gmail.com

www.BellicoseBoys.com features two Mexican-Americans: An academic Harvard and an athlete Matt-the-jock.

Massage

Your Listing Could Be Here!

El Cerrito Swedish by Rick www.rickoz2.com 510-932-5478 11-11 Daily

Parenting

You want children, so do I. Let’s talk.

For more information about me, visit http://sites.google.com/site/ mike949h/ Gay Man Looking to be a Known Donor for a Lesbian/Couple. 5’10’’, excellent health, HIV neg., with high fertility numbers, educated (Masters),

Advertise in our CLASSIFIEDS Email us at ads@sfbaytimes or call 415-577-6422 BAY T IM ES M AY 3, 2012

19

VOLTI – All Saints’ Episcopal Church. $25 advance/$30 door.

(555 Waverley St., Palo Alto) 415771-3352. Exploring the nexus between poetry and sound, the translation of inspiration to creation, as some of the best and brightest composers working today.

Kate Clinton: All Fracked Up – Hoytt Theater, Osher Marin JCC. $45 general/$85 reserved.

(200 North San Pedro, San Rafael) www.kateclinton.com. Kate’s hyperbolic fracking method shakes the bedrock of the comedy mother lode with seismic aftershocks of laughter. Presented by Spectrum LGBT Center.

Jane Lynch: Happy Accidents – Grace Cathedral. Free. 9:30am to 10:30am. (1100 California St.) www. nclrights.org. Jane Lynch discusses her journey to professional success and personal fulfillment.

SunDayz – Beatbox. Free. 3pm.

(314 11th St.) www.beatboxsf.com. $10 beer bust with t-dance party.

Cinco de May Post Mortem – Tres Restaurant. $10. 6pm to 8pm.

(130 Townsend St.) www.lacocinasf. org. Join Espolon Tequila in raising funds for La Cocina as we celebrate the end of Cinco de Mayo Madness with tequila cocktails and hors d’oeuvres.

Yoga With Ashae – LoveJourney. 5:30 to 7pm. (Address provided upon RSVP) www.tantraforwomen.com. www.lovejourneytantra.com.

Radically Gay: The Life of Harry Hay – SF Main Library.

Free. 9am to 8pm. (100 Larkin St.) www.sfpl.org. Exhibit continues: Curated by Joey Cain; explores the life, ideas and contributions of Hay, who is considered the founder of the modern Gay Movement.

Above All Else, Audacity – SF Public Library. Free. 6pm. (100 Larkin St.) www.sfpl.org. Guest curator Joey Cain hosts this opening program for the Harry Hay Centennial Exhibition.

Riding Fury Home: A Memoir by Chana Wilson – The LGBT History Museum. $5 donation. 7pm to 9pm. (4127 18th St.) www.glbthistory.org. Chana Wilson reads from her memoir of her lesbian mother, the persecution her mother faced in the 1950s and 1960s, and her own and her mother’s coming out in the 1970s.

An Evening with Achy Obejeas – Koret Auditorium.

Free. 6pm to 8pm. (100 Larkin St.).

www.sfpl.org. Renowned Author Achy Obejeas shares some of her favorite pieces.

Evening with Pat Dewil – Wild Rainbow Safaris. 5:30pm to 7:30pm. (260 Corbett Ave.) www. wildrainbowsafaris.com. Listen to the stories of legendary touring guide Pat Dewil as he retells his adventures through Africa.

by live music in this interactive, live outdoor performance throughout Angel Island.

Bootie SF – DNA Lounge. $15.

9pm to 3am. (375 11th St.) www. bootiesf.com. The best weekly

Kung Pao Kosher Comedy – El Rio. $7. 8pm. (3158 Mission St.)

BINGO – The Billy DeFrank LGBT Community Center. $15. 6:30pm.

(938 Alameda, San Jose) www. defrank.org. Women’s Group – Rainbow Community Center.

6:30pm to 7:30pm. (3024 Willowpass Rd., Concord) www. rainbowcc.org.

Sacred Intimacy & Erotic Arts – Love Journey. $25/$40 couple. 7pm to 10pm. (Location upon RSVP; Sebastopol) www.lovejourneytantra.com. Explore the art of connection and passion through spiritual practice. Women only.

Hysteria – The Jewish Community Center. $100. 6pm to 9:30pm. (3200 California St.) www. jccsf.org. A benefit for the Women’s Community Clinic. Featuring comedian Ali Wong.

Live Songwriting – Red Poppy Art House. $10-$15. 8pm. (2698 Folsom) www.redpoppyhouse.org.

Enjoy live music in the intimate setting of the Red Poppy.

The Odyssey on Angel Island – Ayala Cove, Angel Island $40/$76. 10:30am to 4pm. Thru July 1. (Avala Cove, Angel Island State Park) www.weplayers.org.

Audiences will experience their own Odyssey alongside 12 actors playing over 40 roles, accompanied

However, the same insidious concept is back in business in the Missouri legislature, where one supporter said something about how kids should be learning about math and reading, not about how Billy is in love with a goat.

Last Day at the Zoo

Rufus Wainwright will be at the Fox Theater on Friday May 11.

Photo by Tina Tyrell

Rufus Wainwright – Fox Theater. $45. 8pm. (1807 Telegraph Ave., Oakland) www.thefoxoakland. com.“The greatest songwriter on the planet” according to Elton John, performs in the Bay for one night only.

ering pending state legislation until the final word on the subject is spoken.

I was only half joking when I said I lacked the energy to look up Mr. Scharnhorst and his sophomoric remark. By the way, I couldn’t help noticing that Rep. Scharnhorst never graduated from college, so perhaps it’s a compliment to describe him as “sophomoric,” a niveau that appears to represent the pinnacle of his educational achievement.

But I do feel a genuine mental weariness these days when I encounter the sort of mindless insult that once provoked shock and awe.

RADAR Reading Series – SF Public Library. Free. 6pm. (100 Larkin St.) www.sfpl.org. Featuring the best in emerging and underground writers.

Hosted by Michelle Tea.

Hills to Hollers – Napa Valley Opera House. $18/$22. 8pm. (1030 Main St., Napa) www.nvoh.org.

Bluegrass legend Laurie Lewis, Black Cultural Heritage and soul icon Linda Tillery and Grammy nominated singer/songwriter Barbara Higbie have created a new vocal trio that is an instant sensation.

(ROSTOW continued from page 5)

I could look up the speaker and the quote, but I’m not sure I have the energy. Okay. It was 64-year-old Dwight Scharnhorst ( R- St. L ou is), whose exact words were: “There’s no need to talk about Billy wanting to marry a goat.”

dance party in town; DJ Maya Jakobson.

www.elriosf.com. Lisa Geduldig opens for monthly comedy show.

Bearacudda – Holy Cow. $6/$8 after 10pm. Doors open at 9pm.

(1535 Folsom St.) www.bearracuda. com. A fun dance party for bears and cubs.

Monday Musicals: Superstar Edition – The Edge SF. Free. 7pm to 2am. (4149 18th St.) www.edgesf.com. Enjoy clips from your favorite movie musicals and Broadway shows.

MOMS! Sketch Comedy – The Dark Room. $20. 3pm. Also May 13.

(2263 Mission St.) 800-838-3006. A hilarious sketch comedy for anyone who’s ever been or ever had a mother.

A Raisin in the Sun – AfricanAmerican Shakespeare Company. $10. 8pm. Thru May 27. (762 Fulton St.) www.african-americanshakes. org. Hailed as “one of a handful of great American plays” AfricanAmerican Shakespeare’s L. Peter Callender will direct this monumental performance.

Bijou: A Mother’s Day Anniversary Show – Martuni’s. $7. 7pm. (4 Valencia) 415-241-0205.

Mother’s Day brings Trauma Flintstone and crew to their 7-year anniversary of Bijou, the eclectic queer variety show.

Street Food Tuesday – The Claremont Hotel. Open 5:30pm to 10pm. (41 Tunnel Rd., Berkeley) www.claremontresort.com. A sophisticated take on the food truck craze; Enjoy some of the best fare from local food trucks in smaller portions and an elegant setting.

Meow Mix – The Stud. Free. 9pm.

(399 9th St.) www.studsf.com. A weekly cabaret variety show.

Wheelhouse – TheaterWorks $19-$69. 7:30pm. (500 Castro, Mountainview) www.theaterworks. org. In a comically touching ode to the road, a traveling rock band cuts back on expenses, hitting the highway in a well-worn Winnebago.

PFLAG Meeting – St. Francis Lutheran Church. Free. 2pm to 4:15pm. (152 Church St.) 415-9216902. Join to celebrate the energy of mothers in our lives.

Comedy Bodega – Esta Noche.

Free. 8:00pm to 9:30pm. (3079 16th St.) www.comedybodega.com. A weekly stand-up comedy showcasing some of the best comics in the Bay.

Ekphrastic Poetry – AWE Gallery 2pm to 4pm. (678 Portola Drive) www.awegallery.com. Join for an afternoon of refreshments, art, poetry and conversation with poetry inspired by artist Lisa Meyer-Kairos.

Bi Night – Café Flore. Free. 7pm to 10pm. (2298 Market St.) www. cafeflore.com. Monthly gathering at the famous Café Flore, located in the heart of the Castro.

No Day But Today – The Rrazz Room. $35 advance/$40 door. 8pm.

2 0 BAY TIM ES M AY 3, 2 0 1 2

(222 Mason St.) www.therrazzroom.com. The 10th anniversary show of the annual Cabaret to fights AIDS.

Andy Cohen – Castro Theatre. $25. 6:30pm. (429 Castro St.) www. castrotheatre.com. Bravo’s Executive Producer, Andy Cohen, delves into the nitty-gritty of his experiences in the worlds of television and celebrity.

Sorry about the lesbian den mother. We’ll keep an eye on her activities in the future. I was also going to cover a satisfying victory in a federal court in western Kentucky, where a judge slammed a state government agency for f iring a gay man in a clear case of unconstitutional discrimination.

My focus, however, has shifted away from GLBT news to Newt Gingrich, who will reluctantly release his helium filled presidential ambitions to the wind in about f ive minutes. I have turned on MSNBC in giddy anticipation, and am now looking at a woman with grotesque leathery skin and a disfiguring fake tan.

Well, I just spent nearly 30 minutes listening to the tubby hasbeen present a lovely tribute to himself, a grandiose farewell, as if an epic battle had been waged but heroically lost. Newt has all the self-awareness of the woman with the horrif ic tan, who (I’m guessing) imagines that she looks sexy, healthy and rich.

Finally, while I was saying goodbye to Newt, a first-term Republican in the Missouri state legislature, Zack Wyatt, came out of the closet and called for the defeat of the aforementioned “Don’t Say Goat” bill.

“Today, I ask you all to lead, to stand up for freedom and individual rights,” said Wyatt.

“Today I ask you stand with me as a proud Republican, a proud veteran and a proud gay man who wants to protect all our kids from bullying in the schools.”

Good for him.

–A new column from Ann is available every week at sf baytimes.com. You can reach her at arostow@aol.com.

More Calendar @sfbaytimes.com

Showdown at the Cock-A-Doodle Café

Brass Tacks Heidi Beeler I n Old Oa k l a nd t h i s Sat u rd ay, Ci nco de M ayo w i l l be ma rked by a mother-daughter showdown.

T h is epic bat t le pit s Ca l i for n ia Culinar y Academy of San Franc i sco t r a i n i ng ag a i nst Mex ica n ho me c o o k i n g. L a t i n - i n s p i r e d Ca l ifor nia cuisine ser ved in t he quiet atmosphere of a stately Old

P HOTO S B Y H E IDI BE E L E R

of fer s a brea k fa st ch i le rel leno ser ved w ith poached eggs, black b e a n s a n d c or n t or t i l l a s . He r Latin Breakfast features tomatillo a nd ch i l i verde shor t r ibs w it h cumin blackbeans, fresh avocado and homemade queso fresco.

he r hou s e t o l o a n B l a n c a t he m o n e y. A s h e r d a u g ht e r ’s r e named café drew packed houses, she helped with the cooking and made all the salsas. Three years

W it h i ng red ient s f rom t he Fr iday Old Oa k la nd fa r mer s ma rket , t he menu bend s a nd sway s w it h t he sea son s. T he cof fee i s fa i r t rade a nd plent i f u l. T he ser v ice is fr iend ly and lightning quick. A courtyard out back f ills up before t he wooden tables ins ide. R a i nb ow f l a g s s it a m id st ra i nbow plumed rooster s i n t he front window.

N i ght a nd d ay, d ay a nd n i ght , you c a n eat wel l t h a n k s to t he Arechigas.

fruits m o r F “ s” to nut

CASTRO

FFARMERS’ MARKET FAR

WEDNESDAYS

4PM - 8PM

May 9: Enter to Win an orchid for Mother’s Day. May 16: Craft day: Mother’s Day card making.

Featuring: Rose Mae with fresh flowers and bouquets.

Rodin Farms brings the season’s first cherries, nectarines and apricots. Frog Hollow with juicy peaches, cherries and pies.

NOE ST. BETWEEN

O a k l a n d V i c t o r i a n s t o r e f r o nt aga inst a t aco t r uck parked out f r ont . T he r o o st er a g a i n st t he he n : t he C o c k- A - D o o d le C a f é versus Tacos El Pollo.

“I t h in k it’l l be fun - Mom and I c omp et i n g w it h e a c h ot her,” Blanca Arechiga, Chef-Owner of the Cock-A-Doodle Café and out lesbian, said laughing. “I’ll prov ide t he a lcohol, and Mom w i l l provide the food.”

Act ua l ly, t he A rech ig a s’ Ci nco De M ayo pla ns a re less a foodie smackdow n t ha n t he k i nd of t ag-tea m Bla nca a nd her mot he r, M a r t h a , h av e b e e n i n t he kitchen all along. The Arechigas moved to Oakland’s Fruitvale distr ict from Ja l isco, Mex ico when Bla nca was sma l l. A s t he eldest daughter, she learned ever ything her mot her k new about cook ing and prepared dinner when she got home from school, after milk ing t he cow a nd t he goat s. She attended C AC SF a fter 8 yea r s a s a wa it ress, g raduat i ng i n 20 01, a n d wor k e d a t c u l i n a r y l a n d mark s l i ke t he Claremont Hotel and Venus in Berkeley. When the Courthouse Grill went up for sale in 20 05, her mot her ref inanced

MARKET ST. & BEAVER ST. 1.800.949.FARM • pcfma.com/castro

later, Martha pulled up in a taco t r uc k a nd a n nou nc e d s he w a s quitt ing. In a documentar y, her mom explained the food at CockA-Doodle was too high-falutin.

“She sa id, ‘Bla nca ma kes me ma ke t hese weird panca kes and s t u f f ,’ ” B l a n c a t o l d m e w i t h a laugh.

Now the pair feeds Old Oakland i n s h i f t s , t h e C o c k- A - D o o d l e ser v ing up brea k fast, lunch and weekend brunch; Tacos El Pollo ser v ing Yelp-celebrated tacos to the bar crowds at Broadway and 9t h a fter t he neighborhood restaurants have closed.

S o keepi ng t he Cock-A -Dood le Ca fé open a fter t he ch ickens have gone to roost is an event in itself. T he l iquor l icense, which they’ll use to provide the alcohol for their Cinco de Mayo celebration, allows them to of fer a menu of c o c k t a i l s , l i ke m i mos a s a nd mojitos. T he day t ime of fer ings i nclude Bla nca’s sig nat u re g raham cracker-crusted French toast – made with homemade challah – melt-in-your-mouth lemon ricotta pancakes, and six kinds of benedicts, including crab cake, grilled shrimp and smoked pork loin.

Blanca’s Ja lisco roots show w ith her Mexican-style breakfasts. For Cinco de Mayo day, she’s adding somet h i ng s pec i a l to t he c a fé’s menu – Mexican wedding birria, a slow- cooked stew in a roasted pepper base that she makes with beef, ser ved w it h cor n tor t i l las, lime, cilantro and onions. A long with the expected huevos rancheros and breakfast burrito, Blanca

MORE TAN LINES AT MORE LATITUDES LINES. NOW THAT SOUNDS LIKE A GAME PLAN. Oasis® & Allure of the Seas®

Freedom of the Seas®

Sailing Year-round from Ft. Lauderdale, FL

Sailing Year-round from Port Canaveral, FL

7-NIGHT EASTERN/WESTERN CARIbbEAN Starting from: $749†*

Liberty of the Seas®

4/5-NIGHT WESTERN CARIbbEAN Sailing Nov. 2012 - April 2013 from Ft. Lauderdale, FL Starting from: $329†*

7-NIGHT EASTERN/WESTERN CARIbbEAN Starting from:

$529†*

Book a Caribbean cruise now and receive up to a $25 onboard credit and a Passport to Savings Coupon booklet – up to a $300 value!

Walnut Creek | 1645 Mt. Diablo Blvd. | Walnut Creek, CA 94596 (925) 938-0800 | (800) 964-6593 | walnutcreekctn@aexp.com San Francisco | 455 Market St. | San Francisco, CA. 94105 (415) 536-2600 | (800) 551-0210 | embarcaderoctn@aexp.com †ROYAL CARIBBEAN INTERNATIONAL® RESERVES THE RIGHT TO IMPOSE A FUEL SUPPLEMENT OF UP TO $10 PER GUEST PER DAY ON ALL GUESTS IF THE PRICE OF WEST TEXAS INTERMEDIATE FUEL EXCEEDS $65.00 PER BARREL. *Pricing set forth is the sole responsibility of the travel agent. Prices are per person, cruise only, double occupancy, in US Dollars. All itineraries and prices are subject to change without notice. Certain restrictions apply. Government taxes and fees are additional. Onboard credit (OBC) is in U.S. dollars, has no cash value, is not redeemable for cash, is not transferable and will expire if not used by 10:00 pm on the last evening of the cruise. Credits are per stateroom. Offer is capacity controlled, may be withdrawn without notice. This offer cannot be combined with another OBC on the same reservation. American Express Travel Related Services Company, Inc. acts solely as sales agent for travel suppliers and is not responsible for the actions or inactions of such suppliers. We want you to be aware that certain suppliers pay us commissions and other incentives, and may also provide incentives to our travel counselors. CST#1022318-10, ML#1192, Washington UBI#600-469-694, TA#002 – Registered Iowa Travel Agency, NV#2001-0126. To modify your receipt of valuable offers from American Express, please visit www.americanexpress.com/choice. ©2012 Royal Caribbean Cruises Ltd. Ships’ registry: The Bahamas. 12028274 • 4/13/2012

RESERVE YOUR ROYAL CARIBBEAN CRUISE VACATION WITH US TODAY! BAY T IM ES M AY 3, 2012

21

Around About - “Luscious Live!”

“Luscious Live!” Birthday Dance on Saturday, April 28th celebrated the birthday of Bay Times co-publisher Betty Sullivan at Rooster’s Roadhouse with performances by MILF! The Band and DJ Flirty G. (Photos by Phyllis Costa)

Alameda County Superior Court judicial candidate Tara Flanagan addresses the crowd during a music break.

2 2 BAY TIM ES M AY 3, 2 0 1 2

You’re InvIted!

Join us for an engaging evening featuring the best work from the School of Motion Pictures & television and the School of Acting. event InduStrY PAnelS: New Montgomery Theatre 79 New Montgomery Street San Francisco, CA 94105 Wednesday, May 9, 2012 (Beginning at 7PM): Featuring Production Designers Patrizia von Brandenstein, Geoffrey Kirkland, Stuart Wurtzel and Film Directors thursday, May 10, 2012 (Beginning at 7PM): An evening with Ronald Bass, Academy Award Winning Screenwriter for “Rain Man” Followed by a Q&A

When: Annual Epidemic Film Festival Friday, May 11, 2012 4PM – 8PM (Seating Starts at 3:30PM) Where: Historic Castro Theatre 429 Castro Street San Francisco, CA 94114 rSvP: Seating is limited.

Visit www.academyart.edu/filmfestival or call 415.618.6557.

WWW.AcAdeMYArt.edu 800.544.2787 (u.S. only) | 415.274.2200 Academy of Art University is an accredited member of WASC, NASAD, CIDA (BFA-IAD, MFA-IAD) and NAAB (M.Arch).

Visit www.academyart.edu to learn about total costs, median student loan debt, potential occupations and other information.

BAY T IM ES M AY 3, 2012

23

Congratulations

National Center for Lesbian Rights 35 Years of Fighting for Our Community!

printed on recycled stock

Thank You!

1977 1978 1979 1980 1981 1982 1983 1984 1985 198 1987 1988 1989 1990 1991 1992 1993 1994 1995 19961997 1998 1999 2000 2001 2002 2003 2004 2005 2006 2007 20082009 2010 2011 2012 NCLR 35TH ANNIVERSARY CELEBRATION

415.392.8442 | NCLRights.org

SATURDAY, MAY 5, 2012 www.YouTube.com/NCLRights