2013 09 19

September 19-October 3, 2013 | www.sfbaytimes.com

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Obamacare and Us

PHOTO BY JO-LYNN OTTO, SPECIAL TO THE BAY TIM ES

PHOTO BY T ED EY TAN

Where Have All the Butches Gone?

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By Dr. Naomi Jay, RN, NP, PhD

Zel Anders, owner of Tomboy Tailors, located at Crocker Galleria, welcomed guests to the store’s grand opening in February 2013. The new women’s haberdashery has a diverse customer base with every gender, age, style and more represented, according to Anders.

By Roey Thorpe In the company of lesbians of my generation and older, I frequently hear conversations about how much things have changed since we were young. And invariably, someone asks: Where have all the butches gone?

The question is driven in part by nostalgia, and in part by discomfort with what seems to have been a shift in the way young lesbians think about gender.

And the first question often leads to others: Why are all the butches becoming men?

Why can’t they understand that gender is a social construct, and that women don’t

have to conform to a feminine ideal?

Isn’t that what we were fighting for — a world in which women could wear tool belts and neckties and do anything we damn well please, without the constraints of gender?

At its very core, this was the vision of the feminist movement, and lesbians more

than anyone understood how transformative this could be.

Years ago, I asked the same questions, but today, this conversation makes me uncomfortable. Because I am of this older generation, I have seen things change — and not change — for a long time. (continued on page 13)

Embracing a Gay Lifestyle With Integrated Body-Mind Fitness opportunity to share with our community fresh and useful holistic approaches to high performance and peak potential living.

The KiAi Way Jamie Leno Zimron (Editor’s Note: In this issue, we welcome new health and f itness columnist Jamie Leno Zimron. A 5th Degree Aikido Black Belt, Zimron is an LPGA pro, somatic psychologist, body-mind trainer and a corporate and conference speaker. She is a Phi Beta Kappa graduate of Stanford University and founder of The KiAi Way Inc. and KiAi Golf.)

Many thanks to the Bay Times for wanting to create a new health and sportsoriented column, and for inviting me to be the columnist! As a lifelong tomboy and athlete, I’m looking forward to the

This column is meant to be an informative forum, and to light your fire to be as alive and well as you can be! You’ll find here health and fitness tips, features on LGBTQ athletes, current issues in the sports world, answers to questions you send in, etc. But at the outset, let me say that this column is founded on a few notions that I hope will go on your mantra list: Fitness Can Be Fun! Sports Are Games, Play Them!

We Are Awesome Body-Mind-Spirit Beings!

Health ~ Happiness ~ Harmony ~ Every Day! To me these are the themes for a truly gay lifestyle. Politics aside, I’ve always liked the G part of LGBTQ , maybe because I’m old enough to remember when ‘gay’ meant ‘happy’ and ‘cheerful.’ Researchers at Stanford University have been studying the science of happiness for the past decade. Different bio-chemicals are released when we’re stressing or smiling, and human neurophysiology is intimately responsive to our thoughts, emotions, actions and ex-

periences. Scientists are now providing the data that says feeling good is the basis for peak performance, productivity, and creativity. They are confirming that all people need to be gay, at least in their spirits, because well-being is actually causal to success.

It reminds me of when I was traveling in Greece years ago. I, of course, had to head to the island of Lesvos and hang out on Sappho’s beach (home of our homoerotic lyric poet foremother).

All of the islanders happily proclaimed themselves to be Lesbians, and the men would laugh big Lesvos laughs! So just think: What if everyone decided that gay is good? That figuring out how to feel happy and be cheerful is vitally important? And what if we ourselves could fully embrace a gay lifestyle, with the greatest of joy and pride and integrated body-mind fitness?!

So let me urge you to come out ... and play, have fun, feel good. We’re not talking playing video or new app games here. Whether you’re out of shape, or overly intensely buff, or a geek, or just too busy with work or family or at your computer, find a few minutes to stop and move around. Jog, jump rope, stretch, put some music on and dance.

Feel your body. Move. Breathe. Relax.

Circulate blood, oxygen, chi-flow. Do what kids do and enjoy just being alive and lively.

Kids learn best and thrive when they’re excited and engaged. Since we’re all kids inside, and gay to boot, let’s put having a good time and engaging with excitement at the foundation of our work, fitness, and relationships. I’m not suggesting this in a frivolous way, ignoring the difficulties of daily life or heaviness of oppressive realities and injustices. What we have most input into and control of is our own internal energetic state, and that’s where we can connect to our own power to meet the challenges of the outer world. We can ‘lose it’ in what I’ve come to call the ‘Stress Mess,’ or discover and practice ways to cultivate a more balanced internal zone that yields the happy benefits of well-being and desired external results.

It has been over three years since the Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act was passed. It is often called the Affordable Care Act (ACA) or more commonly, Obamacare. It is undeniably the most signif icant change in the United States health care system since Medicare’s enactment in 1965. There are still challenges to parts of the legislation and regulations are still being worked out.

It is due to take effect January 1, 2014, and the open enrollment process begins October 1, 2013.

What does this 20,000-page legislation mean for us, as an LGBT community, or as individuals with or without children or same-sex partners?

And what if we are married to that partner?

As a disclaimer, I am not a health care policy expert nor do I pretend to understand all aspects of this law.

As a provider, I am always aware of patients’ insurance coverage. I do not provide care on that basis, but I certainly am considerate of the challenges patients face with co-pays and deductibles. With Obamacare around the corner, I was curious how things would change. I was especially curious about its affordability.

If you currently have health insurance through your employer, that may not change, although it might, mostly in the form of higher premiums or deductibles (nothing new there). The so-called “Cadillac Tax” for “good” plans will not go into effect until 2018, we think. If you currently have Healthy San Francisco, it is expected that most plan members will be moved to Covered California or Medi-Cal. These new options may improve your coverage allowing you to access care beyond the borders of San Francisco. You can go to healthysanfrancisco.org/Hea lt h Refor m for more information or call 415 615 4555. There is a pena lt y for not buying insurance. It is the greater of $95 or 1% of annua l income.

However, the penalty does not apply to people who would pay more than 8 percent of their income for health insurance, and that threshold may not be uncommon.

There will be more to come on all of this in forthcoming columns! For now, try taking regular, simple but powerful breathing breaks to deepen your sense of calm, personal power and feeling good, and to replace negativity with How does one en rol l i n Oba maca re? T here a re Hea lt h I nsurcreative flow. (continued on page 23) (continued on page 8)

Editor’s Note: Welcome to our Weddings, Anniversaries & Occasions section. Inquire how your social announcement can appear free of charge, or how your wedding services ad can be included at a special rate: Publisher@sf baytimes.com or 415-601-2113.

“The amazing journey continues!” said Neiman Marcus general manager Alan Morrell, right, who is celebrating his 5th anniversary with his husband Mike Genoshe.

“Yay! We’re happy to be married!” said Michelle Echenique.

Michelle and Michele Cobble were married on August 29 under the Rotunda at SF City Hall.

SF Assistant District Attorney Rebecca Prozan and Julia M. Adams celebrate their five year anniversary and Yom Kippur on the same day. Congrats and more than a thumbnail for you both from the Bay Times.

This month, Deb Stallings of the Horizons Foundation and her wife Carol Whichard are celebrating the anniversary of their wedding in September, 2008.

Right: Javier Perez and Joseph Darling celebrated their domestic partnership with Bay Times design guru Ayana Baltrip Balagas.

The Language of Love ing this family over the past 22 ye a r s , r a i s i n g you n g c h i ld r en against a lot of odds. Indeed your marr iage stands and w i l l stand on t wo levels: the personal and the societal. You are passionate, courageous women of faith, and you stand strong together in your love, your commitment, and the suppor t of your fam i ly and beloved community.”

Bon it a and A nn ie are a Chr ist ia n couple who have been to get her for over 20 yea r s. B ot h women are active in the equality movement and suggested we all 3 collaborate in writing their ceremony so it would truly represent them and how they live their life together. After their f inal edit, it was deeply moving and powerful.

Here is part of the Welcome from their wedding: “ We g at her t o d ay i n c om mu n it y to ack nowledge and honor t he celebr at ion of holy m at r i mony of Bonita and Annie. They h ave a l r e a d y c r e at e d a u n ion of t heir t wo l ives into one over t hei r ma ny yea r s toget her a nd i nde e d , h ave c e lebr at e d t he i r union w ith a ceremony of comm it ment s ome yea r s a g o. Yet , a s t h i s com m it ment a nd t hei r s pi r it ua l l i fe have g row n even deeper in recent years, our so ciety has also struggled towards true justice and equality for all.

A nd so Bonita and A nnie came to realize that they desire to formalize their marriage w ith this we dd i n g, ble s s e d by G o d a nd recog nized by the state. Bonita and Annie, as people of faith, believe in creating an all-inclusive b e love d c om mu n it y wher e a l l people are treated equally, able to enter into a mut ua l ly lov ing covenant blessed by the church and sanctioned by the state with the person they love. And their un ion ser ves a g reater pur pose 2

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Weddings Elizabeth Rivers than their own authenticity and tr uth: it is also a model for the g r e a t e r c om mu n it y of p e o p le ever y where who suf fer from inequality and discrimination.”

And part of the Homily: “ B on it a a nd A n n ie, reg a rd i ng ma r r iage, you have, of cour se, been married for 22 years. Your marriage is an outgrowth of your deep da i ly pract ice of being in lov i ng com m it ted relat ionsh ip, whatever comes. A nd now t h is ma r r iage is a rea f f i r mat ion of your love and your strong relationship. You deserve to be marr ied. You are a fa m i ly a nd are comm itted to one anot her, forever. You shall make your marriage legal, a part of the cultural recognition of who you are as a married couple. And you spoke of how it has not been easy, build-

F i n a l l y, I w a nt t o q uot e t h i s beautiful statement which Bonita made, and which I sense is at the hea r t of your spir it ua l jour ney together as a couple: “God loves us and puts love in ou r hea r t s, a nd t hen we sha re that love with others.”

The very last part of their Statement of Intention: “K now t hat t he world w i l l ask you to deny her a million times.

K now a lso t hat den ia l of you r love for her or of any part of either soul, is a denial of God. This is both God’s blessing and cha rge to you: to l ive toget her w it h honor, courage, a nd honesty. Do you agree?”

Together they said, “We do!”

Rev. Elizabeth River is an ordained Interfaith Minister based in the North B ay. For more infor m at i on , pl ea se visit marincoastweddings.com

I’m Not Just a Marriage Equality USA Volunteer, I’m Also a Client One week from today, I expect my l i fe pa r a dox ic a l ly to st ay prett y much exact ly t he same, yet at the same time to change utterly, in ways I’m not sure I t r u ly u nder st a nd or even c a n fully imagine. I expect my life to change, though, because people whose opinions in such matters I trust, people who already have under ta ken t he step I’m about to take, keep telling me it will.

Ne x t T hu r s d ay, you s e e, I ’m getting married.

Ba c k i n Ju ne, Jef f a nd I c e l ebr ated t he ten-yea r a n n iversary of our f irst date. As of this month, we’ve already been living together for a decade, nearly ha l f of t hose yea r s w it h i n t he formal legal status of a California registered domestic partnership. We’ve already been paying joint state taxes. Jef f covers me on his employer’s health insurance plan. We share f inances, the care and feeding of two cats, each ot her’s joys and sor rows, a war ped sense of humor, and our bed. Obv iously, ma r r iage won’t change any of that. To be sure, we expect our day-to-day life the day after we say, “I do,” to go on largely just as it did the day prior.

Nonetheless, I also expect next that Thursday’s civil ceremony, the promises we will make, and t he words and st at us t hat w i l l be pronounced to and conferred upon us “by the power vested…

Well-known non-profit executive Ellen Goodman and her partner Bianca deVaries are preparing to relocate to Palm Springs, where Ellen will be heading up the local school district’s affiliate foundation.

and shared tradition, yet simultaneously a ver y new and completely u n ique ex per ience for each couple who takes that step.

Marriage Equality Thom Watson by the state” to be transformative. As Marriage Equality USA ( M EUSA) noted i n it s a m icus curiae brief to the U.S. Supreme Court this past winter, “Samesex couples who have been able to mar r y have ex per ienced g reat joy a nd have found t hat m a r r i a ge profou nd ly deepen s t heir love a nd com m it ment to each other.”

I n a conver s at ion w it h Ch r i s G e i d n e r, E d i e W i n d s or - t h e winsome octogenarian plaintif f in the Supreme Court case that resu lted i n t he er ad icat ion of DOM A Sect ion 3, t he federa l law that before this summer had prohibited the U.S. government from recognizing same-sex couples’ legally valid marriages- put it this way: “I ask all gay couples who have lived together a long t ime and got mar r ied, ‘ Was it d i f fer ent t he ne x t mor n i n g? ’ A nd ever yb o d y s ay s yes , a nd they don’t know how to explain it. Marriage itself, you know, it’s a magic word, everybody knows what it means, it means love and c om m it ment a nd t r u s t… but there’s this extra thing when it was a lways denied to you. But it’s profound. W hatever lov ing was there, it becomes really profound loving.”

Jef f and I are incredibly grateful that we now have the r ight to enter into a legal civ il marr iage here at home in Ca lifornia, and to have that marriage recog n i zed by bot h ou r st ate and federal governments. We’re excitedly and nervously expectant about ma k ing our vows to one another at San Francisco’s City Hall, a location with particular sentimental signif icance for California’s marriage equality advocacy movement and for us, personally, and about experiencing these profound changes in our relationship as we express our love and commitment in a formalized way that is a very old

A t t he s a me t i me, we’r e a l s o aware that many of our friends, brothers, and sisters across the c ou nt r y s t i l l a r e d en ie d t h i s s a me opp or t u n it y, ju st a s we were unt i l t h is past June, a nd even in the midst of our celebration and joy we remain mindful of the hard work that remains to be done to bring the freedom to marry to everyone in this count r y, w it hout reg a rd to sex u a l or ientat ion or gender ident it y, and whether one lives in a red state or a blue one.

Emma Lazarus famously wrote, i n wor d s a nd s ent i ment l ater echoed by t he Rev. D r. M a rt in Lut her K ing, Jr.,“Unt i l we are a l l free, we are none of us free.” That’s why I volunteer for a g roup that advocates for the f reedom to ma r r y, a nd why I will continue to do so even now that my own freedom to marr y in California has been secured, and even after I have exercised that freedom for myself. It’s why Jef f and I, in lieu of a traditional wedd ing g ift reg istr y, have set up an equality registry to benef it MEUSA and to help fund the ongoing f ight to w in marr iage equalit y across the nat ion. It’s the hard work of organizations like M EUSA , A F ER, Freedom to Marr y, Get EQUA L , and so many others, that trained, encouraged, and enabled Jef f and me – and thousands like us – to be our own f ierce advocates for our equality and to f ight for our freedom, and that have played such critical roles in mak ing it possible for us f inally to marr y next week.

It rem i nd s me a l it t le of t hat fa mous telev i sion com merc ia l catchphrase of t he late 198 0 s, “ I ’m not just t he president of the Hair Club for Men, I’m also a client.” In that vein, I’m not just a Mar r iage Equa l it y USA volunteer, I’m also a client. And I can endorse it not just in princ iple, but a l so bec au se it h a s worked so wel l for me personally.

T hom Watson , a leader in the nat i o n w i d e g ra ss ro ot s o r g a n i z a t i o n Mar r i a ge E qualit y US A , li ves in Daly City with his f iancé, Jeff Tabaco. W hen he submits his next column, this bio f inally will read, ‘with his husband, Jeff Tabaco.’

Family members of Edith Carney, mother of Pink Triangle founder Patrick Carney, gathered in Lancaster, CA, recently to celebrate Edith’s 90th birthday. Every year, Mother Carney greets volunteers installing the Pink Triangle at Twin Peaks during SF Pride. Patrick said of his mom: “What a gal, from being raised in the conservative potato growing area of Idaho, to driving a Navy truck during WWII at the base in Tacoma, Washington, to being Board Chairperson in the Red Cross’ largest regional district for many years, and now entering her 10th decade continuing to do her part to bring about full equality.”

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Health News

Friends of Naomi Dr. Naomi Jay, MS, RN (OBAMACARE continued from page 1) ance Marketplaces. In California it is called “Covered California” and can be found at www.coveredca.com or ca l l 1- 8 0 0 30 0 150 6.

For our readers outside Ca lifornia, tr y the 24 -hour government help line, 1- 800 - 889-2596, or go to www.healthcare.gov.

I t r ied t he C overed C a l i for n i a pl a n , w it h sever a l scen a r ios of

income. At f irst glance, the numbers may be frightening. But there a re subsid ies for prem iu ms a nd share of cost s. T hey help to reduce or eliminate costs for many lower i ncome people. However, t he mag ic nu mber where subsidies disappear is $45,000. If your income falls above that, even by a small amount, your share of cost will be the same as someone earning $100,000. For one mid-range plan, the monthly premium (for a single individual age 51) was $550 w it h a m a x i mu m out- of-poc ket expense of $6,350 (this does not include the premium). So the individual earning $46,000 can pay up to $12,950 or nea rly 25% of their income. By whose def inition is this af fordable?

For a lot more information than can be covered in t his shor t article, see T he Best Obamacare Guide: For you , your family, and your business by Don Silver. It is available on ly a s a n ebook , but it comes with updates. For example, I purchased the book today, wrote for updates and immediately was told

that the recent IRS ruling regarding legally married same-sex couples mea ns t hat t heir combi ned income will be used to determine el ig ibi l it y for Obamacare subsidies. You can run the numbers to deter mine if you are f inancia l ly better of f married or not, just like the straight folks.

I would have preferred a k inder, gent ler Oba m ac a re (d i sc l a i mer #2, yes I prefer red a one payer system). Obamacare does have its good aspects, however. Those include required coverage for mental health care, the end of penalt ies for pre- ex ist i ng cond it ions, prevent ive ser v ices, i nteg r at ive med icine, and basic hea lt h coverage for m i l l ions of prev iously uninsured A mericans, including, of course, many in our own LGBT community.

Dr. Naomi Jay is a nurse practitioner in the department of Infectious Disease at UCSF.

By Sister Dana Van Iquity Sister Dana Sez, “There’s been a lot of talk about whether Congress will pass a budget by the end of this month - or instead, as some Repugnicans have called for, let the government shut down. A shutdown would mean nearly all federal programs - and the people they work for - would suffer. This means delayed military pay and veterans’ benefits; Head Start centers and Meals on Wheels programs shut; and delayed applications for new Social Security enrollments and loans for students and small businesses. Shutting down the government will hurt the American people. But not the Almighty One Percent.

They’ll be just fine.”

Recently, marriage equality activists joined Senator Mark Leno in the Eureka Valley Recreation Center auditorium in honoring Kristen Perry and Sandy Stier, 2013 LGBT Caucus Pride Honorees and plaintiffs in the Proposition 8 Supreme Court case. Among the attendees were Senator Phil Ting, Board President Supervisor David Chiu, Supervisor Scott Weiner, Supervisor Malia Cohen, John Lewis, Stu-

art Gaffney, Brian Davis, Ted Guggenheim, Zoe Dunning, Rafael Mandelman, Dan Nicoletta, Audrey Joseph, and Anna Damiani. Leno presented a framed Certificate of Recognition from the California Legislative LGBT Caucus to Perry and Stier, commending them “for their generous and tireless work in the LGBT community.” “We’ve all been engaged in the fight for marriage equality,” said Leno, but especially recognized those two plaintiffs.

“You two truly put a human face on this important issue,” he added.

THE FAUX QUEEN PAGEANT is an only-in-EssEff drag glamour contest - founded by Diet Popstitute and Ruby Toosday in 1995, continued by the KLUBSTiTUTE KOLLECTiVE until 2005, and reintroduced by title holder Bea Dazzler in 2012. This contest is for drag queens trapped in real girl’s bodies, so the makeup, wigs, costumes, and talent have to be waaaaay over the top! Held at Slims, the pageant was a benefit for W.O.M.A.N. INC. (Women Organized to Make Abuse Nonexistent - womaninc.org), M ickaboo compa n ion par rot rescue (m ick aboo.org), a nd SaveA Bunny (saveabu n ny.org). T h is yea r, Bea Dazzler teamed up w ith the performer, model, entertainer L. Ron Hubby to bring us this fractured fair y tale event (where the princess rescues herself w ith her own happy ending) during which candidates competed with a “Sisters Grimm” theme. Femceed by Hek l i na of t he fa med Tra nnyshack c lub a nd 20 0 0 F QP t it le holder W i ndy P l a i n s, contes tants contended in two categories: t he Fa i r y Ta le Cout ure fa sh ion wa l k , a nd t he Ta lent Compet it ion. Aud ience member s picked their favorite performer for a special Audience Favorite Prize with points g ranted w it h each dol lar t ipped, a l l of which went to t he benef ic ia r ies). C elebr it y judges were d rag cu lt ura l envoy Holy McG ra i l, fea rless per for mer Trixxxie Carr, FQP 2012 winner Lady Satan, Kegel K ator, B r a n d i A m a r a S k y y, g r a n d dame DQ Ruby Toosday, Martiny, and the Glama-rama’s maven of style Deena Davenport.

Contestants in order of performi ng were Fr ida K - Hole, A go r a f a u x b i a , A n i t a Fa l l a c e , Hazzard Strange, Bonersaurus Rex, Princess Cream P ie, Queen C , Vesper Sy nd, Gu rleen, and Ca ra Cout u re.

T he w i n ner was Ca ra Cout ure, who sa id her r ight f u l t hrone h a d b een stolen by a hot mes s usur per when she was too young

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PHOTO BY RIN K

Sister Dana Sez: Words of Wisdumb From a Fun Nun

Magnet director Steve Gibson with featured artist Mike Ojeda at the opening of the “post punk photographs” exhibit.

to “werk” (or was that “twerk??).

S h e h a d p l a c e d i n l a s t y e a r ’s FQP. This Queen of Thrones became Mot her of Drag (ons) after a n i mpr e s s ive s wor d f i g ht w it h nasty knights to “Break the Door Down.” First runner-up was Hazzard Strange, who showed a taste for all things bloody and glittery, lip-synching Christ ina Perri’s “Jar of Hearts” with a ver y gor y f i n i s h . S e c on d r u n ne r - u p w a s Gurleen, who secret ly a lways wa nted to push a queen of f t he stage and take the spotlight herself. She was “Little Red R iding Hood” who hand i ly slaughtered all the wolves. This was also the steppi ng dow n of FQ2012 L ady Sat a n , whose s w a n song w a s a m a s h-up of R i h a n n a’s “ Sh i ne Br ight L i ke a D ia mond” a nd S h i r l e y B a s s e y ’s “ D i a mond s Are Forever.” Stunning!

CUMMING UP! The annual FOLSOM STREET FA IR is like nothing else in the world . W it h nea rly 4 0 0 ,0 0 0 of your closest kinky friends spread out over 13 cit y block s of adu lt enter t a i n ment , t h i s i s a n “on ly i n Sa n Fr a nCr i sco” ex per ience to be su re. Su nd ay, S eptember 29t h, from 11am to 6:30 pm, lo cated on h istor ic Folsom St reet (from 7th to 12th Streets - and all st reet s i n bet ween), leat her a nd fet ish player s from a l l over t he world converge. FSF features over 20 0 ex h ibitor boot hs sel l i ng fetish gear and toys, a massive live stage, two huge dance areas spinning underground dance, public play st at ions, a nd a n en ha nced erotic artists’ area. Yes, you can still be legally naked. For more enjoyment, you are encouraged to dress in leather or feathers or fetish wear or something freeeeaky!

M a i n st age of fer s a hugely i mpressive l ine-up w it h head l iners Hercules and L ove A f fair w ith classic disco and house anthems; and Miami Horror with i n f luences from da nce-pop a r t(continued on page 22)

National News Briefs compiled by Dennis McMillan

Sacramento, CA - California Calls on Federal Government to Provide Equal Benefits for LGBTQ Vets - 9.11 Large bipartisan majorities of the California State Senate and Assembly have approved AJR 19, a resolution authored by Dr. Richard Pan (D-Sacramento) urging the President and Congress to provide full and equal benefits for LGBTQ veterans who served their country in the United States Military.

NYC, NY - Freedom to Work Hosts First Ever “ENDA Situation Room” - 9.12 “Freedom to Work,” the leading advocacy organization for the passage of the Employment Non-Discrimination Act (ENDA), hosted the first-ever “ENDA Situation Room” at the New York Law School in TriBeca to plot a path forward for the historic LGBTQ legislation. The event brought together, for the first time, a bipartisan group to publicly discuss the problem of workplace discrimination and the Congressional strategy for the path towards victory as we move toward historic winning of the LGBTQ vote in the U.S. Senate.

“Today California is united in recognizing the service of every veteran and correcting the injustices our LGBT veterans have endured for so long,” Dr. Pan said.

“I applaud recent efforts by the Obama Administration to provide equal benefits for all veterans, but there is still much work to do. I am hopeful that our leaders in Washington will heed this bipartisan call for equality and do right by the veterans who have put their lives on the line defending our country.”

Freedom to Work is a national organization committed to banning workplace harassment and career discrimination against LGBTQ Americans.

“AJR 19 raises all of California’s voice in demanding that lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender veterans be treated equally,” said John O’Connor, EQCA executive director. “These veterans risk their safety to defend all of our equality, and California has a duty to demand equal treatment for them. We hope the rest of the country will follow.”

“I’m honored hosting this bipartisan group of leading experts and advocates for this first of a kind event,” said Tico Almeida.

“I’m confident we’re going to win on ENDA and grant all Americans the freedom to work without discrimination. This event focuses on how we get there and get there quickly.”

From 1980 until the repeal of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell in 2011, over 32,000 service personnel were separated from the U.S. Armed Forces under DADT and its predecessor policies. Because these discharges were sometimes characterized as “dishonorable” or “other than honorable,” many of these service personnel and their spouses became ineligible for veterans benefits.

In 2012, the legislature passed Pan’s AB 1505, establishing that if the federal government acts to reinstate benefits to discharged veterans who were denied those benefits solely on the basis of sexual orientation serving in the U.S. Armed Forces, California shall also reinstate to those veterans any state-offered benefits. The federal government has yet to broadly reinstate such benefits.

Now that DADT and DOMA have died, this is just plain wrong. Do it!

Source: asmdc.org/pan Salt Lake City, UT - Ex NFLer Wants to Build Bridges with Queers - 9.15 Footballer Steve Young spoke to about 400 people attending the New Frontiers conference of the group “Affirmation: Gay and Lesbian Mormons.” The former BYU quarterback said his goal “is to build bridges with my gay brothers and sisters. We need to see each other as Jesus sees us.”

Young also reminisced about winning the Super Bowl with the San Francisco 49ers, and spoke about relying on faith. “(Faith is the) fundamental fuel for the human experience,” he said. “If the experience is to return to our Heavenly Father, faith is the fuel from beginning to end.”

He introduced his wife, Barb, as an advocate for the LGBTQ community. “There is not a day that goes by that you are not on her mind. She has spent countless hours advocating for you,” Young said.

Barb Young, a Mormon convert whose older brother is gay, actively opposed California’s Proposition H8 in 2008, even though leaders of the Utah-based Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints enlisted members to work for its passage. The measure banning same-sex marriage was passed by voters. She urged attendees to be “patient like Jesus” and to love LDS church members as they move toward understanding of their LGBTQ family members. “If we consciously embrace Jesus’ teaching of empathy, compassion, and love, the future world will be different,” she said.

The Who’s Who was impressive: Tico Almeida, president of Freedom to Work; Evan Wolfson, president of Freedom to Marry; Brad Sears, executive director of the Williams Institute at UCLA Law; Gregory T. Angelo, executive director of the Log Cabin Republicans; Melissa Sklarz, president of Stonewall Democrats of NYC; and Dave Montez, acting president of GLAAD.

“For almost 125 years, New York Law School has been a leader in fostering discussion and change on issues that stand at the intersection of the law, public policy and social movements,” added Anthony Crowell, dean of the New York Law School. “And on LGBT issues, we take immense pride that we have consistently been at the forefront of efforts to achieve greater equality with our cutting edge scholarship, advocacy and service. Indeed, this work is what makes us New York’s law school.”

So, let’s END the stalling on ENDA! Source: news@meltwaterpress.com

Albuquerque, NM - New Mexico Supreme Court Order Sets Hearing on Same-Sex Marriage Statewide - 9.6 The New Mexico Supreme Court has issued an order setting a hearing for October 23, to consider a request by the New Mexico Association of Counties that the court immediately decide whether New Mexico law permits same-sex couples to marry. All 33 county clerks in the state joined in the Association’s request that the Supreme Court resolve the issue.

The counties’ request to the Supreme Court was filed in response to a case brought by six same-sex couples represented by the American Civil Liberties Union of New Mexico, the national ACLU, the National Center for Lesbian Rights (NCLR), and local attorneys. Judge Alan Mallot of the Second Judicial District Court in Albuquerque issued a declaratory judgment against all 33 county clerks, ruling that the New Mexico Constitution requires issuance of marriage licenses to otherwisequalified same-sex couples. The counties requested the Supreme Court to immediately review Judge Mallot’s order in order to resolve several pending cases around the state concerning the issue of marriage for same-sex couples.

The order by the Supreme Court invited the six plaintiff couples to respond to the counties’ request by September 23 and to appear at oral argument October 23. The couples will argue that the Court should accept the counties’ request and immediately extend the freedom to marry to same-sex couples statewide.

“Now is the time for New Mexico to treat same-sex couples with the same dignity and respect as all other couples and fully respect their lifelong commitments to each other and their families,” said ACLU of New Mexico Executive Director Peter Simonson. “We look forward to presenting the strongest possible arguments on behalf of our clients and all New Mexico same-sex couples.”

Columbus, OH - Marriage Pushed in Ohio for Equality - 9.13 “Why Marriage Matters Ohio,” a marriage equality education campaign supporting the right for any loving, committed Ohio couple to marry, has launched. The launch announcement was held in Cincinnati, Cleveland and Columbus simultaneously. The launch introduced the campaign and its founders: Equality Ohio Education Fund, Freedom to Marry, the Human Rights Campaign Foundation and American Civil Liberties Union Foundation of Ohio.

“All Americans should be able to marry the person they love, and they should be able to celebrate that love in Ohio,” said Ohio Senator Sherrod Brown. “Full rights should not vary by geographical lines. Marriage Matters Ohio will bring this issue of equal rights to the forefront.”

“Marriage matters,” said Elyzabeth Holford, executive director of Equality Ohio Education Fund. “There are couples in Ohio living in legal limbo. It’s time to change that. Marriage Matters Ohio is part of our roadmap to fairness and dignity for all Ohioans.”

Evan Wolfson, founder and president of Freedom to Marry, noted, “Personal stories are the best conversation starter – and conversation is the best way to help people understand that all loving and committed couples in Ohio, gay and non-gay alike, should be able to share in the freedom to marry and the security and meaning marriage brings.”

A recent poll of voters in Ohio by the Public Religion Research Institute shows support for marriage equality in a dead heat at 47% on both sides.

Why Marriage Matters Ohio was created to bring marriage equality to the forefront.

NCLR Legal Director Shannon Minter said, “We are grateful to the New Mexico Supreme Court for recognizing the importance of this issue and putting the case on a fast track.”

“We are committed to bringing full equality to every Ohioan in all aspects of life. That means employment equality, housing equality, and marriage equality,” said ACLU Foundation of Ohio Executive Director Christine Link. “The Supreme Court’s DOMA decision sounded the call that these inequalities will no longer stand. Any couple who commits to marriage should receive the same rights, privileges and responsibilities.”

The Mormon church teaches that same-sex attraction is not a sin, but acting on it is. Sorry, I can’t support this until being sexually active is accepted too.

Get ready, New Mexico, for some really warm weddings!

Oh hi, Ohio, looks like you’re next for wedding bells!

Source: kansascity.com

Source: nclrrights.org

Source: freedomtomarry.org

Judy Finch, who has a son and two grandchildren who identify as being gay, said she sees mostly LDS church members in her private practice as a psychotherapist.

“In my role (as a therapist) I provide hope and reassurance and encouragement,” Finch told the crowd. “Heavenly Father loves our gays exactly the way they are exactly the way he created them.”

Local News Briefs California Legislature Passes Bill to Aid Transgender Californians with Name Changes, Identity Documents Assembly Bill 1121, authored by Assemblymember Toni Atkins and co-sponsored by Equality California and the Transgender Law Center, passed the Assembly by a bipartisan vote of 56-18, with an official vote count pending. The bill will help ensure people who are transgender have better access to legal name changes and identity documents that accurately reflect their gender identity. The bill will continue to Governor Jerry Brown’s desk.

“My bill provides transgender people with a simple, inexpensive, and private process for changing their names and documents to be consistent with their gender identity,” said Assemblymember Atkins.

“Every Californian deserves the freedom to live as their authentic selves, and AB 1121 removes significant barriers to that freedom,” said John O’Connor, EQCA executive director. “Having documents that reflect who you really are is crucial to achieving full equality, and EQCA is proud to see this bill advance to the Governor’s desk.

In 2011, the National Transgender Discrimination Survey showed that 44% of transgender people reported having been denied service, harassed or assaulted when presenting identity documents that did not match their gender presentation.

“As a transgender man myself, I have experienced both the discrimination that often accompanies having identity documents that do not match one’s gender identity as well as the burdensome process of revising identity documents. This important bill will mean more transgender people will be able to go about their daily activities - from voting to applying for jobs – without being unfairly outed or put in danger,” said Masen Davis, TLC executive director.

AB 1121 will allow individuals to bypass the court and apply directly to the Office of Vital Records to amend a birth certificate. AB 1121 would also make the name change process more private and affordable for transgender people, exempting them from the requirement that a person pay to publish a notice of the intended name change in the local newspaper for four weeks.

Senate Approves Resolution Condemning Russian Anti-Gay Laws Russian President Vladimir Putin signed a draconian law threatening to arrest, detain and imprison individuals or groups that publicly support LGBTQ equality or spread positive “propaganda” about “non-traditional lifestyles.” Punishable offenses could include public acknowledgment of one’s sexual orientation, displays of affection between same-sex partners, statements in support of LGBTQ rights and the use of symbols, such as rainbows, that are connected to the LGBTQ community. Russia also recently enacted a law that prohibits same-sex couples from adopting children.

SR 18 was introduced in response to Russia’s new laws that discriminate against LGBTQ people. In addition to asking the state’s two largest pension funds to stop making direct future investments in Russia, the resolution calls on the International Olympic Committee to withdraw its position that expressing support for LGBTQ people and their rights is a violation of its rules, and to seek a written guarantee from the Russian government that athletes and other visitors to the 2014 Winter Olympics in Sochi will not be prosecuted under the anti-gay laws. SR 18 also urges other organizations holding large internationally televised events in Russia, including the Miss Universe Organization and its owner Donald Trump, to move their events to countries without such virulently anti-gay laws.

The full Senate approved a resolution urging CalPERS and CalSTRS not to invest future resources from their pension plans in Russia. SR 18, authored by Senator Mark Leno, passed with a 29-1 bipartisan vote. SR 18 now becomes the official position of the Senate. It does not require Governor Jerry Brown’s signature.

“Recent news reports confirm that violence against LGBT people has increased since these new anti-gay laws took effect, reinforcing our belief that the host country of the Winter Olympics aims to promote continued discrimination against its citizens and international visitors based solely on sexual orientation and gender identity,” said Senator Leno. “We must not tolerate, nor invest in, such blatant violations of human rights.”

Story by Dennis McMillan

Story by Dennis McMillan BAY T IM ES S EPT EM BER 19, 2013

9

Building a More Successful LGBT Business Community for these companies and agencies to provide workplace benefits for LGBT employees, marketing to LGBT customers, and support for LGBT nonprofits; but it’s a completely different level of commitment for these organizations to not only BE gay friendly, but to also BUY gay friendly.

Kim Corsaro Publisher 1981-2011

2261 Market Street, No. 309 San Francisco CA 94114 Phone: 415-503-1375 525 Bellevue Avenue Oakland CA 94610 Phone: 510-846-8158

The playing field is evened when corporations and government agencies, both large and small, determine not to discriminate against businesses based upon the business owner’s sexual orientation or gender identity. Their outreach efforts help to bring more LGBT businesses in to bid on these contracts.

E-mail: editor@sfbaytimes.com www.sfbaytimes.com

Guest Editorial

Dr. Betty L. Sullivan Jennifer L. Viegas Co-Publishers & Co-Editors

Ayana Baltrip Balagas Design Direction & Production

Abby Zimberg Design & Production

Juan Torres Advertising Executive Juan@sfbaytimes.com Robert Fuggiti Calendar Editor

Kit Kennedy Poet-In-Residence Barbara Brust / Lucille Design Webmaster & Technology Director

Michael Denison Juan Ordonez Distribution

Writers Rink, Sister Dana Van Iquity, Ann Rostow, Kirsten Kruse, Teddy Witherington, Kate Kendell, Pollo del Mar, Heidi Beeler, K. Cole, Gary M. Kramer, Dennis McMillan, Tom Moon, Paul E. Pratt, Terry Baum, Gypsy Love, Joel Engardio, Rafael Mandelman, Scott Wiener, Shelley MacKay, Kit Kennedy, Leslie Katz, Karen Williams, Gary Virginia, Stu Smith, Zoe Dunning, Kathleen Archambeau, Jim Tibbs, Mark Penn, Marcy Adelman, Stuart Gaffney & John Lewis Brandon Miller & Joanne Jordan Photographers Rink, Dennis McMillan, Steven Underhill, Phyllis Costa, Cathy Blackstone, Robert Fuggiti

ADVERTISING Display Advertising Standard Rate Cards are available online at sfbaytimes.com or calling: 415-503-1375.

Classified Advertising: Refer to the order form in The Classifieds section, which you may mail or fax in, or e-mail us at classifieds@sfbaytimes.com. Deadline is 3 p.m. the Thursday preceding publication. For display classified information, please call Display Advertising

As Golden Gate Business Association’s recently hired Managing Director, I am humbled to stand on the shoulders of giants. GGBA has played an important role in shaping the conversation around LGBT equality as the nation’s first LGBT business organization and one of the first LGBT organizations in the San Francisco Bay Area.

Many have asked me, “Why relocate from Orlando, Florida, to the Bay Area, when the right to marry has been secured for same-sex couples?

What else is there to fight for?”

My response to those friends is that marriage equality in California has given us the right to live, but it hasn’t given us the right or the opportunity to thrive. For employees and business owners, discrimination still takes place and there is much more work to do.

One of the initiatives that GGBA advocates for is the inclusion of LGBT-owned businesses in the supply chains of major corporations, as well as local, state, and federal agencies. It’s one thing

LETTERS TO THE EDITOR If you would like to write a letter to the editor with comment on an article or suggestions for the Bay Times, email us at editor@sfbaytimes.com. © 2013 Bay Times Media Co, Inc. Co-owned by Betty L. Sullivan & Jennifer L. Viegas Reprints by permission only.

Examined Life Tom Moon, MFT “Otherizing” means placing people outside of the circle of “us.” It appears to be an innate and universal human capacity. It’s dangerous,

GGBA is committed to bringing increased opportunity and access for LGBT business owners by connecting them with the right corporate decision makers. This is our opportunity to stand up, stand out, and be counted in business.

Jason Holstein is the Managing Director for the Golden Gate Business Association. In 2012, Holstein was recognized as an Emerging LGBT Leader by the White House Office of Public Engagement for his work with Orlando’s LGBT business community.

• TJPA LGBT Business Outreach Event Thursday September 26, 4:30-6:30 p.m.

175 Beale Street, San Francisco, CA 94105 RSVP to: Paul@PaulPendergastConsulting.com nglcc.org/events/transbay-transit-centerproject-outreach-event • PG&E LGBT Business Outreach Event Thursday October 10, 9-12 p.m.

851 Howard Street, San Francisco, CA, 94103 RSVP to: Info@GGBA.com | GGBA.com

On Thursday October 10, PG&E will become one of the first public utilities in the nation to hold an

Otherizing lies at the root of virtually all of humanity’s most intractable problems – racism, sexism, homophobia, militant nationalism, religious bigotry, etc. We’d obviously all be better off without it. So how did it ever arise in the f irst place?

Anthropology offers some important insights.

For millions of years, our ancestors lived in small hunter-gatherer tribes.

They were threatened by predators, starvation, and disease, and had to compete with other tribes for scarce resources. In these harsh conditions, those who cooperated with others in

their tribe typically lived longer and had more offspring. Natural selection favored the evolution of love, cooperation, empathy, loyalty, and fairness within tribes. But those same evolutionary pressures also favored ruthless aggression toward members of competing tribes.

But while the capacity for otherizing is deeply ingrained, the more lately evolved structures of the brain can alter the behavior of the more primitive structures. Our unique capacities for self-awareness, self-ref lection, and deliberate intention give us a unique capacity for freedom of action.

Cooperation and aggression evolved synerg istically. Tribes that were more cooperative were also more successfully aggressive, and aggression toward other tribes demanded cooperation within tribes. Hence the strange duality in human nature: We’re capable of deep love and inspiring acts of self-sacrif ice; but we’re also capable of limitless cruelty. Tribalism is alive and well in the structures of our brains.

Otherizing turns off the neural pathways mediating compassion and empathy, which is why trying to feel empathy for a despised other can evoke intense resistance, sometimes rationalized by thoughts about how they don’t deserve it, or by the strange belief that to feel empathy for “bad” people somehow allows them to get away with something. But if you can see the humanity in your enemy, the (continued on page 23)

Profiles of Compassion and Courage: Steven Underhill

Don't Call It Frisco Stu Smith Today I’m profiling one of our own, Bay Times photographer Steven Underhill. If you don’t know Steven, you are likely familiar with his work, as he is one of the most talented and sought after photographers in California.

His love of photography began during childhood, when he would take Super 8 movies while on family road trips.

Now you’ll see him at event opening nights, film festivals, non-profit happenings and more.

SS: How did you become involved in your work?

10

Two historic events are taking place in the next few weeks for the LGBT business community. On Thursday September 26, the Transbay Joint Powers Authority will hold the first California General Services LGBT business outreach event. This agency was responsible for building the Transbay Center, which some have called the “Grand Central Terminal of the West.”

because as soon as we see people as “other,” the brain automatically begins to devalue them and to justify bad treatment of them.

National Advertising: Contact Bay Times / San Francisco. Also represented

by Rivendell Media., Mountainside, NJ 908-232-2021.

CALENDAR

in the region. As competent and capable LGBT businesses procure new corporate and government contracts, their growth allows these LGBT businesses to hire more staff and contract with other LGBT & Allied businesses to provide secondary services.

Why Do We “Otherize”?

at 415-503-1386 #3.

Event listings for consideration to be included in the Bay Times online or print Calendar section should be sent by e-mail to: calendar@sfbaytimes.com.

These opportunities help to build a more successful LGBT business community, which in turn can better support the retail businesses and non-profits

Jason Holstein

These two events are targeted to LGBT architecture and engineering companies, LGBT construction/trade companies, and LGBT-owned businesses in professional services. While both events are free to attend and open to the public, pre-registration is recommended as space is limited.

BAY TIMES SEPTEMB E R 1 9 , 2 0 1 3

SU: Upon graduation from UCLA, I returned to Northern California and started doing landscape photography, shooting much of the wine country. However, I quickly realized my strength was shooting more portraitoriented work. There’s a big difference between photographing grapes and leaves as opposed to engaging animate objects. My personality was better suited at making subjects feel comfortable with a style I was developing rather than waiting for a sun to set. I placed ads around Sonoma County and started building my portfolio, which included focusing on the male subject, and eventually leading to publications of calendars and photo books.

SU: I’m all for supporting the arts, and I do so in many different ways, from mentoring photo artists and journalists to contributing my services and photo portraiture packages to many of the non-profits I have the privilege to cover. In the last several years, San Francisco has lost much of its flavor by artists needing to leave the city and Bay Area. Many add to the richness of the culture and landscape, and it would be nice if there were an increased opportunity for affordable housing.

SS: Name one of your key mentors and explain how he or she inspired your work.

SU: I enjoy donating time photographing non-prof it events, particularly those focused on HIV/AIDS services (Shanti Project, Richmond Ermet Aids Foundation, Academy of Friends and so many more), along with shooting portraits and weddings. I’m most proud of my published material over the years, including 7 photo books, yearly calendars, and magazine work.

As an artist, it’s intrinsically rewarding to have your work on display for others to see.

SU: The American photographer Bruce Weber influenced me. I remember picking up one of his books, O Rio De Janeiro, and seeing a beautiful black and white story where his telling images leapt off the page. There’s a teasing, titillating aspect to his homoerotic work without needing to be pornographic.

SS: If you could fix or solve one major problem in the Bay Area, what would it be and why?

SS: Among your many achievements, which one are you most proud of and why?

SS: What are your future goals and aspirations?

PHOTO BY S TEVE N UNDERHI LL

The Bay Times was the first newspaper in California, and among the first in the world, to be jointly and equally produced by lesbians and gay men. We honor our history and the paper’s ability to build and strengthen unity in our community.

LGBT business outreach event. PG&E will provide LGBT businesses with technical assistance training on how to do business with PG&E, focusing on helping these companies prepare to compete in a changing supply chain.

Steven Underhill with Haifaa Al Mansour, the first female filmmaker from Saudi Arabia.

SU: I’m currently building a social media presence to market a kickstarter project and new male photography website. The website would include several models on display, including video. The viewer can also purchase new photo books and prints. stevenu nderh i l l .c om , f a c eb o ok .c om / StevenUnderhi l l Models, Tw itter: Steven Underhill.

S t u S m i t h i s b o a rd c h a i r e m e r i t u s of Shanti Project , board chair of T he Paratran s it C oordinat ing C ounc il , a m e mbe r of t h e C a st ro C o u nt r y Cl ub Advisory Board and the LGBT Senior Task Force, and producer and host of the public access T V program “T he Drag S how.” KQE D ha s honored Stu a s a 2013 LGBT Hero.

The Week in Review

By Ann Rostow Devilry Afoot Before I begin this morning, I would like to complain and whine for a few minutes. Our “good” computer has decided to sever its relationship with its keyboard. If you turn it off and back on it will work for a while and then stop again for no reason.

I had no choice but to revert to our “bad” computer, which pauses for lengthy stretches of time between each task. Googling, clicking on something, reading a story, progressing down the page, switching from one program to the next--- all these maneuvers take a full minute or more.

Earlier, I was trying to copy and paste an astonishing quote from the Archbishop of St. Paul and Minneapolis, blaming Satan for destroying civilization with same-sex marriage and also crediting the “Lord of Lies” for “the denial of objective truth” that characterizes social discourse these days. Nothing says “objective truth” to me like a discussion of Beezelbub and his nefarious meddling in Minnesota public policy.

But I grew tired of waiting for Bad Computer to pick up the text. Just as I clicked back to Word, the text was highlighted, but it was too late because the ponderous machine was now consumed with the program shift. To cap it off, I glanced around the screen while the minutes passed only to see a sidebar story about a man who videotaped his wife having sex with their dogs, and I couldn’t react! It would have taken a half hour or more, and to what end? What more do we need to know of this sordid enterprise? The breeds? I think not.

I know I can just run out to the store and buy another computer. I’ve been meaning to do so, but inertia sets in.

Parsing Kennedy I have just returned from an interminable foray into cyberspace, where I encountered an interesting, yet weird, essay on the implications of the High Court’s decision in Windsor (the DOMA case). Unfortunately, I can’t tell you the author without another time-consuming delay, but I can tell you that he made some trenchant observations about Justice Kennedy’s frustratingly confusing opinion.

As I’ve said before, Kennedy did us the immense service of overturning Section 3 of the Defense of Marriage Act, but he did so without advancing gay rights law, or indicating whether or not sexual orientation discrimination should be closely scrutinized by future courts. Indeed, as my mystery lawyer noted, Kennedy did not even ground his conclusions in specif ic constitutional doctrine. Instead, he left us a lot of fancy prose to interpret as we (and our adversaries) see fit.

So what does Windsor say about those of us who got married in a free state, but reside in mean state? On the one hand, Kennedy went on at length about the respect owed to state policies, which could argue against forcing mean states to bow down to their sister states. On the other hand, the weight of his opinion insisted that the federal government could not ignore the dignity and value of the marital status conferred to gay couples. If that’s true, then how can other states turn a blind eye without violating the same (unspecified) constitutional principles that Kennedy imposes on the federal government?

We’ll see, won’t we? Meanwhile, the weird part of this essay was the suggestion that states be required to recognize a gay marriage when a couple moves from a free state to a mean

state, but that mean state residents who travel to marry should continue as legal strangers. Say what? Could that line in the sand pass muster under the Equal Protection Clause? Only in an essay, not in real life. After all, how could a state argue that marriage discrimination serves a legitimate, let alone important, state interest if it recognizes some gay marriages but not others based on logistics alone?

We’re Back in Kansas!

Moving on, my stepson has just brought equality to Topeka, Kansas. I exaggerate only a tad, but last night, the Topeka City Council voted 6-2 to add sexual orientation and gender identity to the city’s Human Rights Commission’s list of protected classes. Nathan cast one of those 6 votes and, of course, advocated for the ordinance.

Topeka’s Human Rights Commission does not have the power to litigate, but that didn’t stop opponents from insisting that the measure would summon the wrath of, I don’t know, Satan? That said, the opponents were outnumbered and overshadowed by moving testimony from our side, and as you can see from the lopsided vote, they were in the minority of public opinion as well. Indeed, eight years ago Topeka residents voted down an effort to repeal benefits for gay and lesbian city staff, so you see, there’s nothing the matter with Kansas, or at least its capital city.

As you know, Topeka is the home of the so-called Westboro Baptist Church, a family compound run by lunatic Fred Phelps and several of his deranged children. You may have heard that a group bought the house across the street from the compound, painted it in rainbow colors, and began raising money for the overall betterment of mankind, journalism lingo for I’m not sure exactly what their raising money for but it’s something worthy. My six-year-old granddaughter has been selling lemonade at the location, proving that our families can raise activists too.

Finally, don’t forget that whatever you think of Sam Brownback and his fellow conservatives in power, it was Kansas that helped free the slaves.

Missouri’s the real villain in this part of the country. I come by my views through marriage, but they are now deeply held.

Why Do I Live Here?

Speaking of mean, my own Lone Star State is one of a handful of states attempting to make it diff icult for gay members of the Texas National Guard to get spousal benefits. Yes, there is state participation in the Texas National Guard, and yes, Texas does not recognize same-sex marriages. But the Texas National Guard is, for all intents and purposes, a federal operation, overseen by the National Guard Bureau and administered under a system called DEERS, the Defense Enrollment Eligibility Reporting System.

As such, guardsmen and women are federal employees, and while the Texas branch indeed has “Texas” in its name, that doesn’t mean that the state can opt out of the Supreme Court’s recent mandate. I gather that there are maybe 20 or so federal guard offices in Texas, so when a gay guard tries to sign up for benefits at their local headquarters, they are instead directed to one of these 20 offices, even if the closest one is a hundred miles away.

It almost makes me want to stop rooting for the Longhorns, as if my status as a Longhorn fan isn’t painful enough as it is. I think Lambda is su-

Professional Services ing the state. Yay. And, for the record, the reason I live here is Austin.

Returning To Our Favorite Subject There are now so many marriage lawsuits, both state and federal, that I cannot keep them straight. Toss in our legislative efforts to pass marriage in Hawaii, in Illinois, in New Jersey, and yet a greater level of information overload is achieved.

Under the circumstances, instead of an orderly review of our efforts on the front lines of marriage equality, I will provide a hit or miss collection of recent events more or less at random.

Let’s start with the lawmakers. In Illinois, the state senate passed marriage equality last February, but we have yet to amass the needed votes in the house. We may be getting close, however, and it’s possible that we could see a successful house vote in October or November. Lawmakers meet for a couple of days in both those months for a “veto session.” I have no idea what that means exactly, but it provides a couple of windows of opportunity. If those windows don’t open, we resume our efforts in January.

In New Jersey, we already passed marriage equality, which was vetoed by Chris Christie. (I think his lap band is working, don’t you?) At any rate, we have until next January to override that veto, and we are reportedly getting closer. Meanwhile, Hawaii lawmakers are expected to take up marriage equality this fall.

As for the lawsuits, my eye is on New Mexico, where the state supreme court finally agreed to take on marriage equality after clerks around the Land of Enchantment started handing out licenses on their own initiative. A similar state suit is building in Pennsylvania, where rogue clerks were told to cease and desist. And Pennsylvania is also the scene of a federal case, challenging marriage discrimination on U.S. Constitutional grounds.

In Michigan, a federal marriage suit has just been cleared for an early October oral argument by a judge who says he will decide quickly on the fate of the Mitten State’s antigay constitutional amendment. Other federal marriage cases, or Prop 8-type cases shall we say, are pending before the Ninth Circuit against Hawaii and Nevada. Meanwhile, in addition the Pennsylvania case, our allies have filed federal suits against Virginia, North Carolina and you know what? I can’t remember them all.

The long running state law claim against New Jersey should be coming to a conclusion in the months ahead.

And there’s a state law case just filed in Kentucky of all places, although instinct suggests that this litigation might not be resolved in our favor.

Still, these days you never know.

You get the picture, right? Many cases. Many bills. Many things happening. Did I mention that Oregon voters would likely repeal their constitutional amendment in 2014? Just name a state and something’s going on. Unless the state you name is profoundly conservative, that “something” could easily carve out a new zone of marriage equality.

Twelve Gay Men I see from my list that I should be telling you about the pharmaceutical price gouging case now pending before the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Ninth Circuit. Why? Because in addition to sorting out the underlying issue, the panel will also decide whether or not lawyers can use preemptor y juror challenges based solely on sexual orientation. (continued on page 22)

Read more @www.sfbaytimes.com and check us out on Twitter and Facebook.

BAY T IM ES S EPT EM BER 19, 2013

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Round About - Funeral of José Julio Sarria

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PHOTO BY RIN K PH OTO B Y R IN K

PH OTO B Y ST EV EN UN DER H I LL

PHOTO BY RIN K

PHOTO BY STEV EN UNDE RHIL L

PHOTO BY RIN K

PHOTO BY STEVEN UN DERHIL L

P HOTO BY RIN K

P HOTO BY ST EVEN UN DERHIL L

San Francisco’s Grace Cathedral welcomed the International Imperial Court for the funeral of Absolute Empress I, The Widow Norton, José Julio Sarria. Hundreds of Court members, including Empress Nicole The Great of San Diego, Queen Mother of the Americas, participated in the memorials and related gatherings honoring the beloved Sarria, who died on August 19. Presided by the Right Reverend Marc Handley Andrus, Bishop of the Episcopal Diocese of California, the services included processionals, music performances, and poignant remembrances by Senator Mark Leno and dear friends of the deceased, including Joseph Castel, James Mangia of the Movie Capital Court of Hollywood, Czarina de Castro Maurice Gerry and Empress Galilea of the SF Imperial Council. Graveside ceremonies were led by Empress XXX Donna Sachet and SF City Treasurer Jose Cisneros accompanied by the SF Lesbian/Gay Freedom Band.

BAY TIMES SEPTEMB E R 1 9 , 2 0 1 3

Butch Up!

Speak Up! Speak Out! Laugh Often!

Karen Williams I love butches! Most of all, I respect them. Unlike their femme counterparts, they don’t get to pass. As a self-proclaimed out lesbian femme aggressive top -- TMI -- I was teased once by a very butch girlfriend that she didn’t want to go around with me because everyone would know that she was gay! I remember my look of fake horror, then our roars of laughter at the irony of the situation. While she got called “Sir...” at least once a day, I easily surfed in and out of gay and straight worlds without much commentary about my gender.

When I came out in the early seventies, strict roles were the order of the day. As a lesbian, you were either butch or femme. Coming out

of a heterosexual marriage, I resisted the notion of being someone’s femme right out of the gate, so I tried to pass for a butch. I wore my hair in a pompadour, smoked a blue clay pipe, donned men’s jackets, and figured that since I had the costumes, I would be able to convince women in clubs to go home with me. Real butches thought my costumes were cute and femmes let me buy them drinks. Yet, I had to admit to myself that I wasn’t a very good butch.

I would invite women out for dinner, then forget to pay; or drive them to our destination and neglect to open the door for them. That I was role playing became obvious when I finally met a butch who expressed a great deal of interest in me. Off came the men’s jackets, though I still favored men’s designer silk shirts. That’s because I am a fashionista, which is a role unto itself!

Meeting and falling for a butch convinced me that I was not one! I confused my huntress instincts with the innate natural instincts that define “butchy-ness.” After all, it’s not easy to explain exactly what it is that makes a woman “butch.”

Our English language is actually the challenger in the dialogue. All we’ve got are “male” and “female” or “masculine” and “feminine” to serve as definers of the much more subtle and to-

tally different “butch” and “femme” prototypes. Butches are, after all, women and not men, and that is what makes them so irresistible to women who love women.

Their bravado, style, swagger, and “otherness” is what I love about butches. My dear friend, Margaret SloanHunter, once commented about the erotic f lair and intrigue of butches.

She got no argument from me. I also admire the courage of the butch persona, in the way that the perceived male-ness is a challenge to presumed heterosexuality in our American society. That all types of femmes prefer butches to men mystifies straight people, who in their internalized misogyny cannot comprehend that a woman might prefer another woman whose persona pushes the gender envelope.

What I hope for the butch-femme paradigm is that women-loving-women will continue to love, support, and eroticize butches and butch culture; and that the blurred lines between butches and heterosexual male privilege will have sharper definition so butch culture can remain intact.

For now, I am content to give my props to every butch I encounter, and leave my costumes hanging in the closet behind my dresses, skinny jeans, and stilettos!

Karen Williams is a grateful femme...Check out her style @ karen@sf baytimes.com.

(BUTCHES continued from page 1) ly that: women. In today’s terminology, their gender expression is masculine, and their gender identity is female. They wear their tool belts proudly, and I am happy to admire the show. For them, a butch identity resolves the issue — if people have a problem with it, it’s their sexism or homophobia rearing its head.

But that experience is not everyone’s, and it never has been. Butches may look a lot alike on the outside, but they aren’t the same on the inside.

Guest Contributor

I have, in my life, loved many butches.

My relationships and affairs have almost always been with masculine women and, more recently, with trans men as well.

In the mid 1990s, as a grad student, I wrote about the lesbian history of Detroit.

I interviewed 48 women who had lived as lesbians between 1930 and 1970. When I met them, these women were mostly in their sixties and seventies. Of the 48, four — almost 10% — said that if they were young today, they would transition their gender and become men.

Don’t get me wrong, there are many, many proud butch women who are exact-

How did you know you were a lesbian?

You got thrown out of Girl Scouts and hated Barbie, and never felt comfortable in a dress and heels. But as well intentioned as we may have been, plenty of lesbians never fit that ideal. Not just trans men but also lesbians like me, who pored over Glamour magazine and loved anything that sparkled. The orientation fit, but my attempts at correct dyke behavior were a miserable failure.

In short, the gender of who we love has always been a separate question from our own gender expression, and our attempt to consolidate gender identity and expression with sexual orientation has led us to a fundamental misunderstanding of the trans experience.

Roey Thorpe

In my experience, for as long as I have found myself in intimate circumstances with butches/studs/masculine-identified women — from way back when I was too young to be in the bars where I was meeting and going home with them — a curious thing happens. Once there is enough trust established, I become witness to a moment of confession. The confession goes something like this: “I don’t know how to explain this, but I don’t exactly feel like a woman. I mean, I’m butch, and that’s close, but honestly, I’m not sure what I am.”

of being in the wrong public restroom (much to our outrage).

This didn’t surprise me, really, because of all those late-night confessions I’d already heard. I knew that for many, “butch” was the closest they could come to a word that would describe the experience of being a masculine person in a woman’s body. But for these folks, while “butch” was better than “woman” or “lesbian,” it still fell short. You’ve probably heard butches who say that they don’t use the term “butch lesbian,” but prefer simply “butch.” This isn’t a denial of sexual orientation, but a claiming of a complicated gender identity.

One of the mistakes that we made as lesbian feminists is that we combined sexual orientation and gender expression into an androgynous dyke ideal: short hair, no makeup, able to fix a car or bake bread with equal ease and, frequently accused

When lesbians ask where the butches have gone, what we’re saying is that we don’t understand trans men. We are stuck on three core beliefs:

For many of us, particularly of an older generation, being out and proud lesbians and feminists has been our life’s journey — and hard won. The communities that we’ve built as a shelter from the storm of a misogynist culture are particularly dear. As one close friend said to me, “I love being a woman so much that I can’t imagine giving that up.” And the idea of becoming a man — with all the unearned, unexamined privilege that the idea suggests — is especially incomprehensible; it’s a betrayal of trust.

Check out more from the

Bay Times

(continued on page 22)

@ sfbaytimes.com.

BAY T IM ES S EPT EM BER 19, 2013

13

Real Estate and Design

The First Time- Part 3

Real Estate Mark Penn Last month, we left you hanging a bit as we discussed the importance of finding the right location of your future home. While you might be f lexible about many of the property’s aspects as you shop, location is probably one that you should be very careful about. Remember that, unlike renting, this is not only your home, but it’s also likely to be an investment.

Hopefully, at some point, you will feel that it’s time to move up, or to sell this first home. And if the fates are good, as well as your decision-making, it would be nice to get a return on your investment. We haven’t seen much of that in recent years, but it certainly has been the rule over the long haul, and is likely to be again (we’re already seeing it in many markets). Remember, though, that it’s your home first, and an investment second.

Today’s perfect location may not be tomorrow’s, and with the way that

neighborhoods have been changing, one very important piece now is “potential.” What might not have been an “A” destination in the past might be that in the near future. If you are interested in possibly making an investment in an area that doesn’t look so great today, but perhaps has some new infrastructure in the offing – transportation lines, future retail or light industrial improvements coming –you might be very happy with the results when it comes time to sell.

In the North Bay, for example, there is a commuter rail line being developed. Some properties near the proposed train stations that, in the past, were less desirable have become much more so almost overnight. But other areas along the train right-of-way may be perceived to have lost some value.

These types of things are worthy of thought and open minds in any community. So, in short, do a lot of homework and talk to your agent in depth about where you might want to live.

Now – about writing that offer. This is where a good, experienced agent will really be your ally. There is a general misconception that price is what determines the quality of an offer, and while that’s usually the first thing a seller will look at, by no means is it the only factor that will determine whether or not yours will be accepted.

All the money in the world isn’t worth a thing if the offer can’t be successfully seen through to close of escrow – at that point it becomes not only worthless, but also, in many cases, costly.

Your REALTOR® should be able to tell you what kinds of things are important to a seller when they review your offer.

There are many strategies that your agent can discuss with you, such as length of escrow, length of contingency periods, rent back possibilities for the seller’s benefit, and more, which can make your offer shine a little brighter than others. And, especially if you are in a competitive situation with other buyers over the same property, you will want to be as appealing as possible. Something has to make it an offer that the seller can’t refuse. Ask your agent what sorts of things you can do to “sweeten the pot” and there should be some answers there along, of course, with that magic word: “cash.”

Next month we’ll get back to some numbers and trends. There are changes in the wind.

A Bay Area native, Mark Penn has been a REALTOR® with Coldwell Banker since 2004. He is also active in animal welfare, and is a former educator, facilitator, and air traffic controller. Mark can be reached at mark@MyHomeInSonoma.com.

PHOTO COURTE SY OF HERTH REALTY

PHOTO CREDIT: REYREYSPHOTOGRAPHY.COM

Herth Real Estate Fundraising Benefits Harvey Milk Academy

Guest Contributor Mark McHale, Herth Real Estate

More

This outpouring of concern and generosity has been amazing to witness. I feel like I lit the match by asking people if they could help. The spirit of giving spread like wildfire.

Hundreds of people have contributed what they could and have asked their friends to do the same. I’ve been astounded at the response.

To make a donation, please go to hmessfusd-ca.schoolloop.com/.

News, Stories and Arts &

Entertainment online @sfbaytimes.com 14

which was burglarized and vandalized just before the school year started.

PH OTO B Y ST EVE N UN DER H I LL

A huge thank you to members of the community, including business owners (MUMC), neighbors, residents of Eureka Valley (EVNA), many people and groups from across the city, and the country for pulling together. We raised over $25,000 to give to the Harvey Milk Academy,

Mark McHale with Sande Leigh, Harvey Milk Academy principal, and students in the schoolyard.

BAY TIMES SEPTEMB E R 1 9 , 2 0 1 3

Bay Times photographer Steven Underhill captured original images along the waterfront during final rounds of America’s Cup competitions between the US representative, Team Oracle, and New Zealand’s Team Emirates.

Real Estate and Design

Aging in Place: Bathrooms If the size of your bathroom permits, a no curb shower is the best option for both safety and aesthetics.

The drying area in front of the vanity and toilet should be 48” to 60” wide.

Unless it is a bathroom that will be used by young children, a walk-in shower with a bench is usually a better option than a tub/shower combination.

Project Remodel Jim Tibbs A month ago, when I was writing the first installment of this article, I was helping my parents to explore options for adapting their home to better meet their needs as they get older. As it turned out, the changes that were needed, especially in the bathrooms, were too costly and too disruptive to be considered as viable solutions. In a four-week period, my siblings and I helped my parents find a universally designed apartment and move out of the house they had lived in for 54 years. Although I think it is wonderful that our family accomplished this life-changing milestone in record time, I don’t recommend following our example. Planning in advance is the better way to go. Trust me.

One of the fundamental principles of good interior design is to create living spaces that remain relevant over the life of the room. This is especially true for bathrooms that are costly to remodel and present a unique set of challenges for aging homeowners.

Below are some of the guidelines to follow when planning your next bathroom remodel. Remember that safe and comfortable access is one of the primary goals for a well-designed bathroom.

If having a bathtub to soak in is a must, keep the height of the tub at 18” or below.

Slipping in the shower or bathtub is the #1 cause of home-related injuries.

For that reason, all showers and bathtubs should have grab bars no matter what the average age is of the users.

Grab bar design has come a long way in a short time. There are plenty of very stylish options from which to choose.

Most people f ind a comfort-height (slightly higher) toilet with an elongated bowl the most comfortable option for both sitting and standing.

Vanity heights have also increased to help keep things within easy and convenient reach.

Lever handles on plumbing fixtures are very attractive and much easier to operate than other types of handles.

A good lighting plan is an important f inishing touch for any bathroom.

At a minimum, you need two ceiling lights over the shower and drying area and a wall sconce (or two) over the sink.

Designing for the comfort and safety of multiple generations does not mean that you have to give up on aesthetics.

A thoughtful design can achieve the ideal balance of form and function to serve your needs for many years to come.

Jim Tibbs is the creative director of HDR Remodeling. If you would like to learn more, please read his blog at http://hdrremodeling.wordpress.com or follow him on Twitter @HDRremodeling1.

The entry and shower door openings should be at least 32” or wider, if possible.

P H OTO S B Y BI LL W I LS O N

The shower itself should be a minimum of 36” by 36” in size, with a low curb to reduce the trip hazard.

Photographer Bill Wilson joined the crowd for the official opening of the new Bay Bridge, including a “chain cutting” by Lt. Gov. Gavin Newsom, who was assisted by SF Mayor Ed Lee, Cal Trans staff and dignitaries from Oakland and beyond.

BAY T IM ES S EPT EM BER 19, 2013

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Use Your Imagination to Fuel Creativity, Not Anxiety ARIES (March 21 – April 19) Halt harmful habits, Aries. You’re perfectly positioned to break pesky patterns now. Banish compulsive behavior from your comfort zone by replacing a love of power with the power of love.

LEO (July 23 – August 22) Look alive, Leo! Unusual insights are en route now.

Be aware of mysterious messengers whose words and actions awaken your spirit. Some may even be tapping at your window now.

better.

Astrology Gypsy Love Physician and holistic health guru Deepak Chopra believes the world is creating a new identity. He suggests that, by merging science and spirituality, we’re transcending deep-seated divisions and cultivating a karmic kinship as “global citizens.” Chopra says this universal evolution is activated by our ability to imagine: “The worst use of imagination is anxiety.

The best is creativity. We must choose creativity in order to transform the world.”

TAURUS (April 20 – May 20) Tune in, Taurus. Your subconscious sparkles brighter than a barrel full of bling now. Adorn yourself in hidden treasures that sleep in your psyche. Seeing isn’t nearly as important as believing.

VIRGO (August 23 – September 22) Keep it simple, Virgo. Celestial hues are highlighting how you synchronize head and heart. Commit to ideas that invigorate your soul, seek knowledge, and share the love. Don’t overthink it.

GEMINI (May 21 – June 20) Rejuvenate your intentions, Gemini. Paradigms of your past are dissolving now. However unsettling, this process forces you to fixate on what you truly fancy.

Aim with an open mind.

LIBRA (September 23 – October 22) Perpetuate the potency of your passions, Libra.

Stellar shifts substantiate your most desirable means of security now. Giving your pleasures a practical platform will enhance your chances for professional advances

CANCER (June 21 – July 22) Keep calm, Cancer. It’s tempting to let tension take over as you liberate from career constraints that have confined your creative potential. Peaceful patience will pave your way to success.

www.AstrologyByGypsyLove.com

SCORPIO (October 23 – November 21) Muse it or lose it, Scorpio. The Universe is endowing you with a deluge of divine ideas now.

Meditate mindfully so you can plug planetary pointers into your daily routine.

SAGITTARIUS (November 22 – December 21) Submit to your higher senses, Sagittarius.

Inconsistencies with friends and associates have been simmering behind the scenes. Engage your instincts to rightfully recalibrate where your loyalties should lie.

CAPRICORN (December 22 – January 19) Come back to basics, Capricorn. Cosmic catalysts reveal the need to narrow your focus now. Pinpoint your most precious priorities, and detach from peripherals that pull you off course.

AQUARIUS (January 20 – February 18) Be accountable for your ambitions, Aquarius. As you continue to climb closer to your dreams, it’s your responsibility to flush out unfounded fears that undermine your reputation. Take charge.

PISCES (February 19 – March 20) You’re currently riding the ups and downs of an astrological rite of passage. No problem, Pisces. The Universe is guiding you with a guild of guardian angels. Make some magic.

Gypsy Love’s astrology readings have helped 1000’s of people attract what they authentically desire.

As Heard on the Street . . .

compiled by Rink

AL L PHOTOS BY RIN K

What’s your favorite thing to do at the annual Castro Street Fair coming up this year on October 6?

16

Jezebel Patel

Savannah Summers

Nic Hunter

Empress Galilea

John Brosnan

“I appreciate the continuous welcome and reception of the SF community.”

“I like that, unlike the government, the Castro Street Fair will still have money after October lst.”

“My annual brunch with all of my friends, for the last 8 years.”

“Everyone coming together one day of the year in the Castro.”

“Great local vendors, great friends, and great music.”

BAY TIMES SEPTEMB E R 1 9 , 2 0 1 3

Arts&Entertainment Here, Levinson shares with us her thoughts about San Francisco’s cabaret scene, Bay Area Cabaret’s new season, and how LGBT culture fits into the mix.

expose them to seldom-heard artists and even genres with which they are not familiar. Second is that we strive to offer affordable evenings for our audience, and to make it accessible to a greater number of people. An evening at Bay Area Cabaret is the most reasonable cabaret evening in town, with prices ranging from $43 to 48, and no food or beverage minimums.

Of course, there are bars in the Venetian Room offering drinks, and the Laurel Court Restaurant just outside the room offers a full buffet supper - and free parking on Nob Hill - for only $40 plus tax and tip. Finally, we strive to build a sense of community among our patrons. It is a pleasure to watch that camaraderie grow among our 140 subscribers, many of whom begin friendships at our shows and artist receptions.

BT: What distinguishes Bay Area Cabaret from other nightclub events in Northern California

BT: Describe the cabaret scene in San Francisco, and how it compares to what’s happening in New York.

ML: The first thing is that we are not a nightclub, under pressure to fill seats night after night. Ours is a curated cabaret series, like Lincoln Center’s American Songbook series. It is operated as a nonprofit. In programming each season, we aim to take our audience on a musical journey, texturing our offerings with a varied lineup of artists from Broadway, jazz and pop.

Our aim is not to rotate artists who can sell seats, but to gently expand our audience’s musical tastes and to

ML: Both San Francisco and New York had thriving cabaret scenes from the 20’s onward. But in the 90’s, the climate started changing, with more and more rooms beginning to close. Just last year, longstanding cabarets in New York, such as Feinstein’s and the Oak Room closed, though fortunately, the Café Carlyle, Joe’s Pub and the beautiful new 54 Below remain.

Many of us at the Bay Times previously lived in Manhattan, where we attended as many cabaret shows as possible. The quality and intimacy of those performances is now captured in shows presented by Marilyn Levinson, Founding Executive Producer of Bay Area Cabaret. New York can eat its heart out, as Bay Area Cabaret performances take place at the elegant, historic and uniquely San Franciscan Venetian Room at the Fairmont Hotel, high atop Nob Hill. Bay Area Cabaret’s new season launches this weekend with television actress and stage star Megan Hilty.

Megan Hilty

I founded Bay Area Cabaret ten years ago in response to both a dearth of cabaret-style entertainment in our city and dwindling audiences. Since Bay Area Cabaret started, we’ve noticed a bit of a resurgence of cabaret in San Francisco. Certainly, our audiences have continued to grow, season after season, and we’ve found that we are slowly expanding both the definition of cabaret (introducing our audience to shows by Nellie McKay with Chanticleer, Mary Wilson, Stacey Kent and others) and the cabaret audience itself.

P HOTO BY RIC HARD M ORGEN ST EIN

Bay Area Cabaret’s Visionary: Marilyn Levinson

Marilyn Levinson, Bay Area Cabaret Founding Executive Producer

BT: How does the Bay Area’s LGBT community impact the cabaret scene here?

BT: How does the LGBT community fit into the cabaret scene in New York and San Francisco?

ML: The Bay Area’s LGBT community is definitely a large part of Bay Area Cabaret’s audience. There seems to have always been a connection between the LGBT community and cabaret, dating all the way back to the Weimar era in Germany.

There are many theories as to why, and mine is this: In dealing with their own struggles and challenges of wanting to be accepted for who they are, gay people can relate to an artist’s struggles and challenges of wanting to be heard and accepted.

Cabarets allowed artists to express themselves freely in the name of art, and thus provide a safe place for the LGBT community to be themselves and express themselves, as artists and audience members. Honesty or, more specifically, authenticity, which is the benchmark of a cabaret performance, is a concept that seems to resonate with the LGBT community.

ML: The LGBT community always seems to be on the cutting edge of discovering new talent as well as appreciating and supporting great talents that have made their mark in music and theatre.

The LGBT community is not only a large part of our cabaret audience, but also they are our family, our friends, our co-workers and our community in general. My associate producer Michael Williams was, for years, the owner of the Castro’s Medium Rare Music. We feel that the likes and dislikes of the LGBT community heavily inform our programming.

goes into shaping our seasons. We look for artists who have an authentic connection to their music and lyrics, and who have a story to tell - all while making an enduring connection with an audience in an intimate room.

This season is a melange of legends at the top of their craft, new discoveries and long-time favorites, while also being musically diverse -- mixing artists from the worlds of Broadway, jazz, cabaret and popular music.

BT: What thoughts do you have about upcoming performers in your new season?

Our Opening Night Gala on 9/21, features Megan Hilty, the blonde bombshell star of NBC’s Smash and Sean Saves the World (co-starring with Sean Hayes and Linda Lavin) and Broadway’s Wicked and 9 To 5. Although general seating tickets have sold-out, there are a limited number of tickets and reserved seats available to those who purchase either a 6-show or 7-show subscription.

ML: Bay Area Cabaret’s 10th Anniversary Season is our most ambitious season yet! A lot of thought and care

Editor’s Note: See the back page of this “Bay Times” issue for the upcoming Bay Area Cabaret season.

like I got from the artists I listened to growing up, that feeling when you are touched and are moved into that space of complete happiness and joy.

This may sometimes come from a phrase in a song, or a song itself, or even a visual stimulation. Reaching and sharing in that feeling with others is my goal.”

can purchase her new CD “Something Cool” with the Tammy L. Hall Quartet on iTunes, CD Baby and at all of her shows. For more info, go to facebook.com/veronica.klaus andmyspace.com/veronicaklaus.

Stylish Chanteuse Veronica Klaus Nacio Herb Brown. From that moment on, I knew that I was in for a wonderful interview.

Gems of The Bay Kippy Marks I recently visited the home of Veronica Klaus. Stylish, talented Veronica warmly greeted me at the door, after I rang the doorbell. As I walked into her cozy and quite charming apartment in Hayes Valley, she offered me something to drink and proceeded to make an espresso. She then turned on a 1920’s player piano and played for me “You Are My Lucky Star” by

Veronica was born in Gillespie, Illinois, to parents Jackie and Kenny Klaus. She is the youngest of 5 siblings. At the age of nine, she desired to play the trumpet, but told me that her mother had an old, beat up rusted trombone in the basement of their home and wanted Veronica to play this instrument. She did, and played the trombone for the next year until she got braces. In fifth grade, Veronica switched to the tuba under the sly influence of her band director. At the same time, she undertook singing in the choir and proceeded to get a 1+ rating at solo and ensemble competitions singing the Carpenters. This encouraged her to follow a vocal path.

Veronica attended the University of Illinois with a degree in music education. Upon completion, moved to San Francisco in 1987. She started performing at club Uranus, at the EndUp, and at club Chaos. She would

perform a song called “Organ Grinder,” and would grind up sausages and meats. It was very kitschy, to say the least! She soon realized that this style of singing and performance art was not really the direction she wished to pursue, so Veronica decided to do more serious pieces of music. She created a band, and found herself doing the first ever Hayes Valley block party. She also performed at private house events hosted by Greg Taylor, and would later became a regular at Café Du Nord.

Her inf luences include artists like Etta James, Jimmy Scott, Big Maybelle, Bettye LaVette, Julia Lee, Peggy Lee, and Mitty Collier. Veronica has always chosen to go toward the not-so-obvious artist and music. She says, “By performing these styles of songs, I give homage to the sometime forgotten artists that have played such a major impact on myself and our society as a whole.”

She continued, “My goal is to reach and share in that feeling one gets,

You can see Veronica Klaus perform on Tuesday nights at Martuni’s from 7pm-9pm through October. You

Violinist Kippy Marks entertains audi e nces worl dw i de w ith hi s in spirational compositions and lively performances that draw from classical, jazz, blues and dance. kippy marks.us

BAY T IM ES S EPT EM BER 19, 2013

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Openly Gay Writer/Director Kyle Patrick Alvarez Talks About His Latest Film: C.O.G.

Film

Gary M. Kramer The first film adapted from the work of David Sedaris, C.O.G.—the title means Child of God, not Capable of Genocide—has many vivid moments, such as David ( Jonathan Groff) sleeping on the floor of a bus and waking up in his drool, or David attempting a Sisyphean task of carrying a tank filled with butane for miles. The story has David (who renames himself as Samuel) trying to “find himself ” by working at an apple orchard in the Pacific Northwest. He befriends Curly (Corey Stoll), a forklift operator, and finds a mentor in Joe (Denis O’Hare), an alcoholic Jesus freak who teaches him about God and how to

make jade clocks in the shape of the state of Oregon.

Sedaris fans should appreciate this effort, which relies mainly on finding the humor in awkward situations. In a recent phone interview for the Bay Times, I spoke with openly gay writer/ director Kyle Patrick Alvarez about C.O.G. Gary M. Kramer: Like your last film, the excellent Easier with Practice, C.O.G. is very much about a shy/lonely/lost young man who finds himself caught up in an almost surreal situation. How do you identify with and/or relate to that experience?

Kyle Patrick Alvarez: [Laughs] For me, what I’m drawn to is the complex male ego. In Easier with Practice, he is cripplingly shy. In C.O.G. David is cripplingly arrogant. They learn similar lessons, but in different ways. It’s not common to see lead male characters having weaknesses.

In Easier with Practice, it’s embracing sexuality; in C.O.G. it’s how his sexual and social identity kind of become the same thing.

GMK: I like that you are a gay man telling queer stories. What prompts you to make gay films?

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Stories @sfbaytimes.com Twitter, and find us Facebook.

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BAY TIMES SEPTEMB E R 1 9 , 2 0 1 3

K PA: I don’t always, deliberately want to make gay films, but the films that draw me, and the themes in these stories, are specific to a certain gay experience, but also really universal.

Not crossover films, but true human experiences that are queer experiences too. I had to embrace wanting to tell those stories.

GMK : A lso like Easier with Practice, C.O.G. charts some uncomfortable moments. Why do you emphasize the awkward in your work?

K PA: It comes from being challenged. The scenes that challenged me in C.O.G. were charting how David develops his relationship with Curly. I guess I like to make people squirm. I love feeling uncomfortable in films. You feel something. I think the best comedy comes from a place that feels a little dangerous. I’ve always

been interested in making something that doesn’t go down easy. I never want to make the film that after it ends, you forget it.

GMK: Samuel uses humor to diffuse situations, and creates a laugh when he tries to fit in.

How did you adapt the text and create and develop the humor in the film?

KPA: In the case of C.O.G., some of it was there on the page. A lot of the funny moments in the printed story didn’t fit into the film, but the funny moments in the film aren’t ones Sedaris wrote. For example, when he says, “The Bible’s poorly written.” I tried to channel what Sedaris would f ind funny, and try to capture his spirit and do justice. The character in the film is not David, but it’s a fictional version of David’s non-fiction story. Who is this person and how does he fit in?

GMK: Rejection seems to be something that Samuel experiences often. How did you approach the escalating level of Samuels’ despair?

KPA: It was always about the way to handle the darkness of the film— casting Jonathan was to always have some levity and not make it really depressing—balance between comedy and drama. He was likable and had enough humor about himself to elevate the film so it never became too difficult to watch.

GMK Samuel also rejects Curly after being surprised by his “toy” collection. Curly is in-

credibly sexy and magnetic.

Why do you think Samuel f lees?

KPA: I never met Corey until production, and he has a real sexual energy to him. You can’t compute it. I like that he’s so hot, that folks ask: Why would you leave the room?

Samuel leaves because he’s freaked out—not about penetration, but how open Curly is, which is the opposite of Samuel, who is more civilized and insecure and thinks its improper to discuss [sex] so openly. Some folks are out loud and some want to fit in and tone down. It’s not that Samuel is closeted—he goes giddily back to Curly’s house—but in this room, he’s like “What am I doing here?” Curly is so openly sexual, and yet he has a disassociated relationship to how he approaches sex—he’s childishly proud.

GMK: Samuel makes some very bad decisions in the film. Are you sympathetic for his character, or is he just pathetic?

K PA: [ L AUGHS]. A little bit of both. Sedaris wrote a memoir, so looking back, he is very self-aware.

And telling this story, he is removing his self-awareness and gaining it. At its core, C.O.G. is about knowing how other people see you. That’s why you follow him. There’s a naïveté, even though he’s a bit of a jerk. It’s fun to see him get cut down to size, but he doesn’t run away. His pride goes from a negative trait to a positive trait over the course of the film.

GMK: What did you learn about apples, jade cutting, and Jesus making the film? Which do you prefer?

KPA: [Laughs]. Almost as much as there is to know. Making the f ilm was the experience the character goes through—starting out in the apple fields. It was a physical struggle with little money and time. Those are physical interactions and they make Samuel grow, and so is making a film. Apples smell. Shooting those factory scenes, there was such a distinct smell, and spending 2-3 days in that smell, you never forget it. I can’t imagine working there, but every time I smell an apple, I have a sense memory. I don’t know that I learned much about Jade. © 2013 Gary M. Kramer Gary M. Kramer is the author of “Independent Queer Cinema: Reviews and Interviews,” and the co-editor of “Directory of World Cinema: Argentina.” You can follow him on Twitter @garymkramer.

Kippy Marks for Grand Duke

Gypsy Love (Editor’s Note: Violinist Kippy Marks is a music columnist for the “Bay Times.” He often accompanies singer and dancer Gypsy Love, who is our astrologer. We are very proud of our multi-talented contributors!)

It’s no surprise that I believe in the power of love. As a San Francisco native, I’ve had the joyful pleasure of living in a city whose spirit encapsulates and celebrates love in every form.

From freedom to fun to philanthropy, our community is recognized around the world for its warm embrace. Kippy Marks, candidate for Grand Duke 2013, radiates love unlike any other.

The Grand Ducal Council of San Francisco, Inc., was founded in 1973

by H. L. Perry to raise money for a wide array of charitable organizations through large annual costume balls and other various fundraisers throughout the year. In 1998, the Grand Ducal Council of San Francisco created and added a sister Court located in Alameda County. A third

Kippy Marks devotes his life to love.

A vibrant musical entertainer and passionate owner of healing arts services business “Kima Exclusive Entertainment,” Kippy strives to inspire his community through his tireless devotion to raising funds for charitable causes. By sharing his gifts of music and healing, Kippy has helped raise over a quarter million dollars for local organizations such as: Black Coalition on AIDS, The Richmond/ Ermet AIDS Foundation, Project Open Hand, The Ducal Court of San Francisco, The Imperial Court of San Francisco, AIDS Emergency Fund, Breast Cancer Emergency Fund, Leukemia Society, and Immune Enhancement Project.

When asked about his intentions for Grand Duke, Kippy responds, “My ultimate goal is to merge the diverse array of talent in our city and uni-

fy them through the Grand Ducal Council of San Francisco in support of important causes that help build our sense of solidarity and happiness.

Currently, we see so many individual artists doing their own thing – and doing it well! My vision is to galvanize the next generation of philanthropists and non-profit groups by enhancing our channels for bridging art and activism.”

Kippy’s enthusiasm is contagious – just like his smile. He wholeheartedly commits himself to generating support from organizations that have yet to assist the efforts of the Grand Ducal Council of San Francisco. Kippy has joined forces with international tourism giant Ghirardelli Square, Stereotype Media (a movie production company owned by philanthropist Eliot Seal), Wattle Creek Winery, and in this newspaper where he’s the columnist for “Gems of the Bay,” which highlights the extraordinary local musicians of our San Francisco Bay Area.

As the first African American candidate for Grand Duke, Kippy is especially interested in helping the African American community gain higher visibility and empowerment.

Having partnered with the Black Coalition on AIDS for several years now, Kippy is an active advocate for promoting health, wellness, and prosperity among minority groups throughout the Bay Area and beyond. “Art – like love – is universal,” he says. “It knows no race, religion, or creed. Its sole purpose is to express and inspire.

This is why my campaign motto is: ‘Inspire your community for unity.’ I

believe that art transcends color lines, and so does my mission.”

And a magnif icent mission it is. If elected, Kippy will seek partnership with the San Francisco Gay Men’s Chorus to produce a live performance series that raises funds for the Grand Ducal Council. Also on his trajectory are plans to collaborate with The Conservatory of Music and the San Francisco Symphony in support of these funding efforts.

Kippy currently holds the title of “King X” of Krewe De Kinque, a charitable Mardi Gras inspired social club. He’s worked closely with the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence as co-emcee alongside Queen X, Kit Tapata, Mutha Chucka, and San Francisco legend Sister Roma.

When he’s not enchanting audiences with his lively performances, Kippy Marks shines his light via other modalities of love and healing. He is a music teacher, certified massage therapist, and Reiki Master. The colors that Kippy has chosen to characterize his campaign are perfectly suited for his platform. Green represents the tradition of peace. Gold represents illumination, wisdom, and wealth.

When asked to describe himself, Kippy shares: “My music and healing practices have always been my way of reaching out to the community.

It’s a wonderful feeling when you can inspire someone...when you can help them experience just a little more joy in their day. I love to connect with the community. That’s why I love performing live, and why I’m inspired to

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Prof ile

such sovereign Ducal Court exists in London, Ontario, Canada. Each chapter has its own Board of Directors and is financially responsible for its own management. In addition to local non-profit status, many courts in the United States have Federal status. Each court holds an annual coronation, which is usually the chapter’s largest fund raiser, and is attended by both local members and members of other Ducal chapters, as well as Imperial Courts across North America.

The coronation culminates with a ceremony in which the new monarchs – the Grand Duke and Grand Dutchess – are crowned. In San Francisco, the new monarchs are determined by popular election held in the community.

work with the Grand Ducal Council of San Francisco.”

The inscription Kippy wrote on the back of his original album Hummingbird says it all: “In the current state of the world that we live in, we all must strive to be the best human beings that we can be, sound and music and love are a very powerful way to help us along in this process. It is up to each of us to show each other the love that is needed.”

Voting day for the Grand Duke election is Saturday, September 21, 2013.

Cast your ballot for Kippy Marks at any of the designated voting locations: Project Open Hand (730 Polk Street between 9:00am to 1:00pm), Eagle Tavern (398 12th Street between 1:00pm to 5:00pm), and the Magnet (4122 18th Street between 2:0 0 pm to 6:0 0 pm). Remember to bring a valid ID from San Francisco, Marin, or San Mateo county.

His campaign headquarters is at the Midnight Sun (4067 18th Street). For more information, visit facebook . com/KippyMarks.

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compiled by Robert Fuggiti

See many more Calendar items @ www.sfbaytimes.com

Glamorama – SHN Orpheum Theatre. $75. 8 pm. (1192 Market St.) www.macys.com/glamtickets. An annual fashion show and HIV/AIDS fundraising event, with headlining performance by Sheryl Crow.

Celebrating 35 Years of Activism Through Song – GLBT History Museum. $5. 7 pm to 9 pm. (4127 18th St.) www.glbthistory.org. A special exhibition opening for the San Francisco Gay Men’s Chrous.

Gym Class – Hi Tops. Free. 10 pm.

(2247 Market St.) www.hitopssf. com. Enjoy a night of fun at Castro’s only gay sports bar.

Improvised Downton Abbey – Bayfront Theater. $20. 8 pm to 9:50 pm. (Fort Mason Center) www. improv.org. Enjoy an improvised period story illustrated in the style of Downton Abbey.

Friday Nights at the De Young – De Young Museum. $11. 6 pm to 8:45 pm. (50 Hagiwara Tea Garden Dr.) www.deyoung.famsf. org. Enjoy the museum in a fun, festive and dynamic atmosphere with live music and cocktails.

Some Thing – The Stud. $5. 10 pm. (399 9th St.) www.studsf.com.

A uniquely themed party every Friday night, with drag performances at 11 pm.

Sonoma County Book Festival – SRJC Santa Rosa Campus. Free. 10 am to 4 pm. (1501 Mendocino Ave., Santa Rosa) www. socobookfest.org. Enjoy a book festival with presenting authors

The Richard Diebenkorn exhibit will be a the de Young Museum through September 29.

Dorothy Allison, Helene Weckler,

Anthony Marra and more.

Kathy Griffin – The Mountain Winery. $45-$125. 7:30 pm. (14831 Pierce Rd.) www.kathygriffin.net.

Emmy Award winner and hilarious comedian Kathy Griffin comes to the Bay Area for a stand-up show.

The Goat, or Who Is Sylvia – Phoenix Theatre. $25-$50. 8 pm.

(414 Mason St.) www.thegoat. brownpapertickets.com. A Tony Award-winning and Pulitzer Prizenominated script about love, loss, and the limits of tolerance.

Jock – Lookout. $2. 3 pm to 9 pm.

(3600 16th St.) www.lookoutsf.com.

A weekly fundraising party for Bay Area LGBT sports groups.

Honey Soundsystem – Holy Cow! $7. 10 pm. (1535 Folsom St.) www.honeysoundsystem.com. An eccentric Sunday dance party with strong drinks and fun mash-ups.

Glamazone – The Café. Free. 9 pm to 2 am. (2369 Market St.) www.cafesf.com. Enjoy drink specials during the day and drag performances through the evening.

Richard Diebenkorn Exhibit – de Young Museum. $11. 9:30 am to 5:15 pm. (50 Hagiwara Tea Garden Dr.) www.deyoung.famsf. org. Explore the first exhibition to 20

BAY TIMES SEPTEMB E R 1 9 , 2 0 1 3

focus on this pivotal period in the career of Richard Diebenkorn, the renowned postwar American artist.

Through September 29.

confront each other about the past and their hopes for the future in this play about coming out and facing the truth. Through October 6.

Wanted – Q Bar. Free. 10 pm to 2 am. (456 Castro St.) www.sfwanted. com. Enjoy a night of dance and electronic music along with $2 drink specials.

Castro Farmers Market – Noe St. at Market. Free. 4 pm to 8 pm. (Noe St. At Market) www. pcfma.com. Enjoy fresh produce and local made foods and delicacies.

Happening every Wednesday.

Gay Bowling – Mission Bowling Club. $15. 5 pm to 8 pm. (3176 17th St.) www.missionbowlingclub.com.

Mix, mingle and meet new friends at this weekly bowling social. Full bar and restaurant inside club.

Mephistopheles – SF Opera. $28-$285. 8 pm. (301 Van Ness Ave.) www.sfopera.com. An impressive production of Arrigo Boito’s Mephistopheles, with internationally renowned Ildar Abdrazakov, Patricia Racette, and Ramon Vargas.

Trivia Night – Hi Tops. Free. 10 pm. (2247 Market St.) www.hitopssf. com. Test your trivia knowledge at this sports bar.

Video Tuesdays – Lookout.

Free. 8 pm. (2600 16th St.) www. lookoutsf.com. VJ 6PAC plays the best in music videos every Tuesday.

To Sleep and Dream – Z Below. $15-$35. 8 pm. (470 Florida St.) www.therhino.org. A father and son

Smack Dab Open Mic Night – Magnet. Free. 8 pm. (4122 18th St.) www.magnetsf.org. An open mic night for all. Hosted by Larry-bob Roberts.

LGBT Business Outreach – Webcor/Obayashi Joint Venture Project Offices. Free. 4:30 pm to 6:30 pm. (175 Beale St.) 415-621-0600. A unique event for LGBT business owners to learn more about the Transbay Transit Center Project and upcoming opportunities.

Jack the Ripper – The Hypnodrome. $30-$35. 8 pm. (575 10th St.) www.thrillpedlers.com. An evening of horror, madness, and song to commemorate the 125th anniversary of “Jack the Ripper.”

Through November 23.

Grand Ducal Council of SF 40th Anniversary – Hornblower Spirit Yacht. $65. 7:45 pm. (Pier 3, San Francisco) www.

sfducal.org. Join the Grand Ducal Council of San Francisco on Friday, September 27, 2013 as we celebrate 40 years of community service on a 4 hour Bay Cruise Dinner.

Boy Bar – The Café. $5. 9 pm to 2 am. (2369 Market St.) www.guspresents.com. The Castro’s hottest weekly party with go-go dancers and early drink specials.

Ladies Boat Party – Five Star Yacht Co. $65. 6:30 pm to 10:30 pm.

(Location upon RSVP) lisa@fivestaryacht.com. A woman’s only cruise in the Bay with gourmet buffet dinner and entertainment by Stephanie Teel Band.

2013 Magnitude – Magnitude. $100. 9 pm to 4 am. (525 Harrison St.) www.folsomstreetfairevents.org.

The official Saturday night dance event of Folsom Street Fair.

Treasure Island Flea – Treasure Island. $3. 10 am to 4 pm. (Treasure Island) www.treasureislandflea.com.

Shop art, antiques, clothes, furniture and more at this popular monthly flea market.

African Americans & the Media – SF Main Library. Free. 2 pm. (100 Larkin St.) www.sfpl.org.

Jewelle Gomez and Devorah Heitner meet for a conversation about black media history.

Disco Tea Dance – Saguaro Hotel. $45-$60. 5 pm to 10 pm (1800 E. Palm Canyon Dr., Palm Springs) www.aidsassistance.org. A disco tea dance party with special performance by Grammy Award Winner Thelma Houston.

Folsom Street Fair – Folsom Street. Donation based. 11 am to 6 pm. (Folsom St.) www.folsomstreetevents.org. One of the world ‘s largest kink and fetish festivals.

Karaoke Mondays – Lookout.

Free. 8 pm to 1 am. (2600 16th St.) www.lookoutsf.com. KJ Paul hosts a weekly karaoke night.

LGBTQ Support Group – Petaluma Health Center. Free. 5:30 pm to 6:30 pm. (1179 N. McDowell Blvd., Petaluma) www.phealthcenter. org. A positive support group for the LGBTQ community in Petaluma.

Meetings every Monday.

Piano Bar 101 – Martuni’s. Free.

9 pm. (4 Valencia St.) www.dragatmartunis.com. Sing along to your favorite songs.

Dolores Claiborne – War Memorial Opera House. $23-$239.

8 pm. (301 Van Ness Ave.) www.

sfopera.com. An opera by Tobias Picker and based on the novel “Dolores Claiborne,” by Stephen King. Also October 4.

Beach Blanket Babylon – Club Fugiazi. $25-$48. 8 pm. (678 Beach Blanket Babylon Blvd.) www.beachblanketbabylon.com. Beach Blanket Babylon, the world’s longest running musical revue, is a high energy pop culture satire and is the perfect night out with friends.

Trivia Night – Hi Tops. Free. 10 pm. (2247 Market St.) www. hitopssf.com. Test your trivia knowledge at this sports bar.

30th LGBT Career Fair – SF LGBT Center. Free. 12 pm to 3 pm.

(1800 Market St.) www.lgbtcareerfair30.eventbrite.com. The nation’s largets LGBT Career Fair showcasing leading Bay Area employers.

Last Drag – SF LGBT Community Center. Free. 7 pm to 9 pm. (1800 Market St.) www.lastdrag.org. A free quit smoking class for LGBT smokers. Wednesdays.

Play with BeBe – Harvey’s.

Free. 8 pm. (500 Castro St.) www. harveyssf.com. BeBe Sweetbriar hosts a weekly trivia game night.

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(ROSTOW continued from page 11) They can’t exclude jurors based on race or gender, so why should they be able to dump gays and lesbians?

I should be talking about the juror question, but although at times this week I’ve been quite obsessed with the subject, I can’t summon my erstwhile enthusiasm at the moment.

Let’s talk instead about the ad for Legal Zoom featuring the woman who has created a toffee business based on her mother’s recipe. The ad itself is innocuous. But after seeing it seventeen million times, sometimes twice in a row, it’s starting to drive me out of my mind.

Her simpering smile. The strange room where, in addition to making toffee, it looks as if she has mounted a

couple dozen bags of toffee on the wall in some kind of art display. It’s not a retail display. What is it? It makes no sense. And, well, how realistic is the whole premise? How realistic is the image of a simple housewife who starts a major candy company in her spare time using online legal websites instead of actual lawyers? It’s Hallmark stuff. It annoys me. Who eats toffee? Who buys it in precious little bags tied with ribbon? The packaging alone must jack the price sky high. I bet each unit sells for $15. Does Legal Zoom provide bankruptcy forms? So many questions.

These days, we are watching Broadchurch, the final episodes of Breaking Bad, and of course reruns of Star Trek Next Generation. As such, my f inal

observation concerns the Star Trek writers’ vision of 24th century bedding. Why would we dispense with the luxurious duvets and f luffy pillows of today and content ourselves with a single sheet of Kevlar and a small cushion several centuries hence? Why wouldn’t we have more comfortable options rather than less comfortable ones?

Another lapse in imagination from the same writers who produced no openly gay characters and who made every single alien race exactly the same height as us and every other planet exactly the same size as Earth.

I still love them arostow@aol.com

(BUTCHES continued from page 13) Others believe that choosing to transition from being butch to being a man shows a lack of courage or imagination, that somehow the person wasn’t brave enough to be a butch woman.

that, we’ve made a space where it’s okay to try out different forms of gender expression, from super-femme to androgynous to butch. That has been incredibly freeing for most of us.

Still others think we’ve failed as a community to create a space in which any woman can dress and act as she pleases.

That was my first reaction to those Detroit butches and studs: that the times were so hard that it had made them long for escape. I wondered if, had they been born a generation later, they might have found support in lesbian feminist communities that they were lacking in the rough-and-tumble bar culture that was their only refuge.

But for some, the hard-won space and freedom to try out different forms of gender expression has confirmed what they knew deep down: that fundamentally, they’re not women at all. And they know that because they’ve had the space and the freedom to be butch, and it still wasn’t the right fit.

But I have since learned that transition is not a betrayal, a lack of courage, or a desire to escape an unwelcoming community. That’s what these Detroit butches and studs taught me. They lived their lives with enormous heart and against all odds. They were the bravest people I knew. They were the survivors, as streetsmart and as proud as anyone I’d met in lesbian feminist circles. I simply couldn’t believe they didn’t have the guts or the vision to live fully as who they were.

And so I came to a different understanding. I now believe that all of the battles we fought and the work that we did has created a community where women can be our true selves to a far greater degree, in every aspect of our lives. And in doing

Most trans men I know came out as lesbians, then claimed a butch identity, and then transitioned. Some of them have realized they never were attracted to women at all and are now gay men — this isn’t as odd as it might sound, if you accept that the lesbian community is the only safe space to explore gender, so it’s where many trans men start their journey.

Maybe that’s why lesbians feel we’ve lost them: because we believed they were ours.

Transgender people are f iguring out how to change what is arguably a person’s deepest identity, the one we are most identified with from birth. The challenges, both in terms of navigating one’s own changing body and the outside world, are staggering, even in the most supportive communities. To make such a decision is like jumping off a cliff with little idea

(SISTER DANA SEZ continued from page 8) ists of the 1970’s and 1980’s and Sister Roma w it h specia l perprog ressive rock acts; as wel l as formance by Billboard recording L ight A sylu m w ith 1980’s mu- a r t i st , B r ia n K e nt. T hu r sd ay, sic, especia l ly t he work s by t he September 26, 6 to 9pm, The Arl i kes of G race Jones a nd A l i- mor y at K I N K .com, 18 0 0 M is s o n M o y e t . O t he r i n d i e a n d sion Street. Tix at aef-sf.org/31. e le c t r on ic a r t i st s f r om a r ou nd t he world a nd here at home i n- Ever wonder how Chuck Palahnclude A iden James (New York); iu k c a me up w it h t he idea for V i xe n Noi r (C a l i for n i a); Pe p - Fight Club’s secret society of recper spray (Califor nia); Heloise reational f ighters? Or how a giant & t he Savoi r Fa i re ( Ve r mont); wooden “Man” ended up on f ire and Icky Blossoms (Oklahoma). in the desert, inspiring one of the DJ Rotten Robbie will serve as world’s most radical gather ings? the Main Stage DJ. Now where’d Welcome to T H E C ACOP HO N Y SOCIETY, an underground I put my leather habit?! g roup of pr a n k ster s whose cu lBut one week before Folsom Fair ture-jamming antics have helped is the 22ND A NNUA L LEATH- shape the contemporar y zeitgeist ERWA LK on September 22 ben- for the past three decades, includef it i n g t he A I D S E me r g e n c y i n g f l a s h mob s a nd Sa nt aC on .

Fu nd a nd t he Brea st Ca ncer Check out some societ y spinof fs Emergency Fund, produced by including bartending robots from S a n d y “ M a m a” R e i n h a r d t R o b o G a m e s , a b l e s s i n g f r o m a n d Fo u n d e r A r t To m a s z e - t he Sister s of Per pet ua l I n wski, sponsored by mamasfam- dulgence, “Hugging Machines” ily.org and Folsom Street Events. from artist K al Spelletich, Art Reg ist rat ion is 10:30a m at 4 4 0 Cars, Doggie Diner heads, video Castro. Last year they raised over shorts, and more! Castro Theatre, $2 0 , 0 0 0 ! T he fe s t i v it ie s b e g i n 6:30 -7:30pm premium reception, w it h t he 13t h a n nua l ra isi ng of 7: 3 0 p m p r o g r a m , g e n e r a l a d The L eat her Pr ide F lag over m ission: $25 non-member s, $15 H a r v e y M i l k P l a z a a t M a r k et member s; pr ior it y seat i ng w it h and Castro, noon sharp, and The book (i ncludes copy of Ta les of Walk starts r ight after wards go- t he S a n Fr a nc i s c o C a c o phon y ing down Market Street. You may Society and seating in Rows F-J ). carr y your club banners, colors, commonwealthclub.org/events. etc. You don’t have to wear leathT R A NSGE N DE R L AW CE N er to join us.

T E R w i l l c e l e b r a t e 11 y e a r s A I D S E M E RG E N C Y F U N D o f i g n i t i n g c h a n g e a t t h e i r t u r n s 31 a t t h e A r m o r y w i t h a n n iver sa r y g a la at Si r Fra ncis L E AT H E R A N D F E AT H E R S D r a k e o n T hu r s d a y, O c t o b e r ho s t e d by D o n n a S a c he t a n d 3r d w it h S PA R K . M i s t r e s s of 22

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what lies below, but knowing that not to make the leap is another type of agony.

This courage deserves our respect and our support.

So, where have all the butches gone?

They’re still around, although some of them go by other names. Some are still proud butches and studs; others, particularly young people, prefer the term “genderqueer,” with endless subcategories that underscore that gender identity and expression may intersect with sexual orientation but aren’t subsumed by it.

They’ve come to understand that gendervariant people may fall across a wide span of femininity and masculinity, but what they have in common is the experience of falling outside of society’s expectations of their gender.

At the core of this experience is enormous creativity and an analysis of gender as a social construct that got its start in lesbian feminism and gay liberation. All our work isn’t forgotten; it has been built upon by a new generation seeking to be true to themselves, just as we dreamed they would.

Roey Thorpe, an activist for social justice for over 25 years, is the director of strategic projects for the Equality Federation. She previously was executive director of Basic Rights Oregon and Planned Parenthood Advocates of Oregon. She was elected as a city councilwoman and acting mayor of Ithaca, NY. This article was first published by SheWired.com.

Ceremon ies is Tit a A ida, w it h entertainment prov ided by Josh K lipp and the K lipptones and Fresh Meat Productions. VIP reception at 6pm, award ceremony at 7. t r a n s g enderl awc ent er. org/spark.

My adult f lick pick is Hole 2, the sequel to - what else but - Hole from ragingstallion.com.

EXPERIMENTS IN FINDING I N N E R P E ACE is t he latest art exhibition now on display at Magnet - the health and wellbeing hub in the Castro - with photog raphs on heav y weight mat te c o a t e d p a p er b y M I K E O J E DA . My favorite was #7 “Dressing,” because it took me back to t he days when Sister Dana used whiteface base makeup (now I just slap paint over my face), and this guy is obviously getting ready to go clubbing (or maybe just going out a s a clow n). Ojeda say s h is work “ is created t hrough a pro cess of observation of social interaction, having a fascination with how people bui ld ind iv idua l environments in order to feel safe.”

Sister Dana sez, “I am sad that openly lesbian Christine Quinn was not able to break through the Big Apple mayoral glass ceiling, but wish progressive N YC Democrat Bill deBlasio luck in the race, and am really hopeful we don’t have to see Weiner’s wiener anymore.”

Round About – All Over Town

PHOTO BY RIN K PHOTO BY STEVEN UN DERHIL L

PHOTO BY R I NK

PHOTO BY RIN K PHOTO BY STEVEN UN DERHIL L

P HOTO BY RIN K

P HOTO C O URT E SY O F J UDY YOUN G

Bay Times photographers Rink and Steven Underhill have been all over town attending Oakland Pride, the SF Pride Annual Meeting, the annual Ghirardelli Chocolate Festival supporting Project Open Hand, Yerba Buena Family Day at the Museum of African Diaspora, and the Out of the Past: A Celebration of LGBT History Party sponsored by the San Francisco Museum and Historical Society at the Old Mint.

PHOTO BY S TEVE N UNDERHI LL

PHOTO BY S TEVE N UNDERHI LL

(LIFESTYLE continued from page 1) Carve out 2-4 minutes to sit quietly.

Stop all activity and focus on your breath. Notice that breathing is more than inhale-exhale-inhale-exhale-etc.

There is actually a space in between breaths, at the bottom of your exhale and top of your inhale. Notice that space, and hang out there for a few moments, or for a count of 5. It’s a very quiet restful space of no-thing and nodoing. Just pure being where you can begin to open into the larger space of pure beingness from which all activity arises and then subsides. It’s a space of healing. Of relief. Restoration. Ef-

fortless balance and even bliss. Within minutes, you can re-calibrate your body chemistry and re-set your mental and emotional state. Plus, it’s immediate and free (and a lot cheaper than a trip to the doctor or therapist or health food store). Such a deal, and so easy to go forward on your gay and merrier way.

Til next time, try out new gay mantras and explore your new hangout in between breaths!

For more information about Jamie Leno Zimron and her work, please visit thekiaiway.com/.

PH OTO B Y RI N K

PH OTO B Y R I NK

(EXAMINED LIFE continued from page 10) intensity of otherizing automatically as also “us” takes patience, but it can begins to diminish. be done.

It can be helpful to remember these words from Longfellow: “If we could read the secret history of our enemies, we should find in each man’s life sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility.” This has nothing to do with excusing bad behavior or condoning injustice. We can strongly condemn cr uel act ions while simultaneously remembering the humanity of the actor. Cultivating the habit of seeing “bad actors”

In his book Buddha’s Brain, neuropsychologist Rick Hanson tells the story of a beloved Native American elder who was asked how she had become so wise, so happy, and so respected.

She answered: ‘In my heart there are two wolves: a wolf of love and a wolf of hate. It all depends on which one I feed each day.’”

Tom Moon is a psychotherapist in San Francisco. His website is tommoon.net.

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