2014 03 06

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PHOTOS COURTESY OF THEODORE PALMER CFEATIVE EDGE PUBL IC REL ATIONS, LLP

The 49er cornerback is poised for a comeback as he reaches out to the LGBT community and receives the “Champion of Compassion” award for his work benefiting animal welfare and inner city youth.

(See story on Page 3)

Bay Times columnist Naomi Jatovsky has known Mindy, Laurie and MK- Michaela Spatt Nobilette- since the now 20-year-old singer was just a baby. Jatovsky introduced us to Mindy, whom

we caught up with as she was traveling back to SF after supporting MK on the show. We were happy to learn that the family reads the Bay Times, which Mindy said “is really great!”

She went on to say, “MK not only has two moms, but she also really grew up in the gay community and a community of women.

Hillary Clinton said, ‘It takes a village,’ and, in our case, it was very much a village of women.”

PHOTO COURTESY AMER IC AN IDOL

San Francisco’s own MK Nobilette is the first American Idol finalist to come out while competing on the popular show, which has been on the air since 2002. So many of us have been struck by, not only MK’s singing talent and ease in front of the camera, but also her gutsiness in putting honesty about herself and LGBT awareness ahead of concerns over possibly losing critical votes during the competition. As a result, MK has become a highly visible role model for gay youth.

MK, in turn, benefits from two of her most important role models right at home in San Francisco: moms Mindy Spatt and Laurie Nobilette.

“We were lucky that we had a group of lesbian moms who all had babies at around the same age,” she continued. “Many of us formed a playgroup, and our group is still incredibly close even after all of these years.”

M K is a lifelong Glen Park resident who graduated from the Ruth Asawa (continued on page 11)

Summit Highlights Castro Dichotomy

By Commissioner Leslie Katz (Editor’s Note: The recent “Lesbians Who Tech” summit, held February 7–March 2 at the Castro Theatre, focused on increasing visibility and tech participation in two historically underrepresented communities: the women’s and queer communities.

We spoke with Lesbians Who Tech founder Leanne Pittsford, who said that, in Silicon Valley, women make $.49 compared to every dollar a man earns. The economic difference is magnified all the more for lesbian couples.

She spoke of how important it is for women to take risks. Pittsford exemplifies that, having made a life-changing $100,000 investment a while back, which she indicated has really paid off.

San Francisco is itself taking a risk, by paving the way for tech workers and businesses, such as

exempting Twitter from the city’s payroll taxes on new hires. As these forces move in, longtime residents are being forced out due to Ellis Act evictions, the ever widening economic divide and other factors. It remains uncertain how the gentrification will leave San Francisco neighborhoods and culture, once the silicon dust settles.

LESBIANS WHO TECH/LYRA LOPEZ PHOTOGRAPHY

MK Nobilette’s Mom Mindy Is Out and Proud Too

Commissioner Leslie Katz represented the Bay Times at the recent summit. We asked her to consider the multiple issues to determine how- or even if- the profound changes can intersect or co-exist with stated LGBT values, such as diversity and inclusion.)

The housing crisis brought about by our City’s desirability as a place to live and work impacts our entire community. How do we embrace people wanting to move into SF, yet not displace those—such as artists, immigrants, LGBT people and people of color— who have made San Francisco a desirable place? What impact will (continued on page 12)

National News Briefs compiled by Dennis McMillan

Madison, NJ - College Baseball Player Comes Out as Gay to His Team After Years of Struggle - 2.24

NYC, NY - Freedom to Marry Launches $1 Million Marriage Campaign in South - 2.24 Freedom to Marry, the campaign to win same-sex marriage nationwide, launched a $1 million multi-state campaign to build majority support for marriage in the South. The new effort, called Southerners for the Freedom to Marry, will include significant field and media work over the next year in partnership with supportive organizations across the region. Bipartisan co-chairs include civil rights icon Rep. John Lewis (D-GA), who kicked off the campaign in a web ad; U.S. Senator Tim Kaine (D-VA); and George W. Bush advisor Mark McKinnon from Texas.

Matt Kaplon didn’t want to call a big team meeting to tell his Drew University baseball team that he’s gay. He was averse to the spectacle of a big production, simply wanting his teammates to finally know who he was as he approached the final season of his college career. He wanted them to hear it from him first.

Kaplon started the process last week by sharing the news with his head coach, Brian Hirschberg. At 31, Hirschberg isn’t much older than Kaplon. The revelation didn’t faze him. “He’s as close to a family member as anyone I’ve ever coached,” Hirschberg said. “He’s like a younger brother to me. When Matt shared his story with me, I respected him more, if that’s even possible.”

“Our investment in the South comes at a pivotal time in the marriage movement,” said Evan Wolfson, founder and president of Freedom to Marry. “The South is home to hundreds of thousands of loving, committed samesex couples – and to a majority of the nearly 50 federal marriage cases now underway in courts across the country. Our new campaign will give voice to the many in the region now ready to move forward, including clergy, business leaders, conservatives, and family members, to show that all of America is ready for the freedom to marry.”

Kaplon decided with the season approaching, he didn’t want to play a single inning without them knowing who exactly he is. It wasn’t an easy 21-year mental journey that led Kaplon to the front of that classroom addressing his team. His life had been largely defined by his involvement in sports, and baseball in particular.

Kaplon is a star on his Drew University team, starting at catcher 97 games his first three seasons. Last season, he was third on the team with a .327 batting average, throwing out 13 runners in 29 starts. At Palisades Park High School in Bergen County, New Jersey, he was his team’s most valuable player his senior year.

Despite growing support in the South, Southern states continue to discriminate against the more than 200,000 couples and their families who make the region their home. According to 2010 Census Bureau data, same-sex couples raising children are more common in the South than in any other region of the country. A recent poll of registered Southern voters showed that support for the freedom to marry in the region is now evenly split.

“Growing up in sports, you kind of hear this stigma that being gay isn’t OK,” Kaplon said. “That traveled with me into college.”

“Having played myself and seeing the climate we’re in now as a sports culture, it’s not easy to be a gay athlete,” Hirschberg said. “It takes a lot of courage, I think, to come out. I’m still learning a lot of this myself.”

In the kick-off ad, Rep. Lewis shares his private photos of his heroic civil rights leadership, and passionately declares, “You cannot have rights for one segment of the population - for one group of people - and not for everybody. Civil rights and equal rights must be for all of God’s children.”

Last October, when he came across the story of Hillsdale College basketball player Derek Schell coming out, Kaplon reached out to Schell, and the two became fast friends. The impact of their conversations - and Kaplon’s revelation that he wasn’t the only gay athlete - was profound. “Words cannot describe what Derek has meant to me,” Kaplon said. “He saved my life.”

“As a conservative, I don’t believe you or I or the government can tell people who they can love or marry,” said McKinnon. “Freedom means freedom for everyone, not just for some. That’s why I’m a southerner for the freedom to marry. And the political reality is that the marriage wedge has lost its edge. This train has left the station and we all need to get onboard.”

And yet homophobic sports associates want to do just the opposite of lifesaving.

Or get run over!

Source: outsports.com

Source: freedomtomarry.org

Phoenix, AZ - Arizona’s Anti-Gay Bill Veto Unlikely to End ‘Religious Freedom’ Movement - 2.27

Chicago, IL - Steroid Use Much Higher among Gay and Bi Teen Boys - 2.23

Washington D.C. - Lobbyist Trying To Ban Gays from the NFL Loses Client - 2.26

To Arizona’s governor, a bill that would have allowed businesses to close their doors to gays and lesbians out of religious conviction was wrong for the state. So, she vetoed it. The buck may have stopped with Gov. Jan Brewer in Arizona, but the fight to pass such laws bannered as religious freedom issues is still on in quite a few other states.

Gay and bisexual teen boys use illicit steroids at a rate almost six times higher than do straight kids, a “dramatic disparity” that points a need to reach out to this group, researchers say in the journal Pediatrics. The study authors said it’s possible gay and bi boys feel more pressure to achieve a bulked-up “ideal” male physique, or that they think musclebuilding steroids will help them fend off bullies.

Jack Burkman, the Republican Washington lobbyist who announced that he’ll push for a bill to ban gays from playing in the National Football League because “we are losing our decency as a nation,” has lost one of his paying clients because of the effort. Burkman says he decided to push the legislation after Missouri Tigers defensive end Michael Sam came out earlier this month. If Sam is drafted in April, he will become the league’s first openly gay player.

“Right behind it are Missouri and Georgia,” said Jay Michaelson, a fellow at Political Research Associates, a progressive political think tank.

Brewer said she tuned out public pressure and made the decision she felt was right. Oh sure, the loss of Arizona hosting the Super Bowl had no effect on her. Sure.

Attention now turns to other states. The Preservation of Religious Freedom Act has been introduced into Georgia’s Legislature, allowing a private company to ignore state law that “directly or indirectly constrains, inhibits, curtails or denies” a person’s religious beliefs.

Two bills are being considered in Idaho. HB 426 would protect people making decisions out of religious convictions - including denying service to someone. HB 427 gives people protection against legal claims made against them in cases involving religious convictions.

A Mississippi bill is being considered to legally protect people against being compelled to take any action against their religion. A Missouri bill that requires the government to show a compelling interest in any attempt to restrict a person’s right to practice religion was introduced. Critics of SB916 say it’s a way to discriminate against gays.

The Ohio House introduced HB 376 giving legal protection to individuals acting, or making decisions, out of religious conviction. Critics say it’s aimed at discrimination against same-sex couples.

The conservative Oregon Family Council is sponsoring the “Protect Religious Freedoms Initiative.”

It would allow private businesses to deny services that would support same-sex marriage.

Conservative South Dakota senators introduced one bill that would allow businesses or people to deny “certain wedding services or goods due to the free exercise of religion.” But its main sponsor withdrew it. But there’s a second one protecting “speech pertaining to views on sexual orientation.” There are also states where proposed bills have already hit a legislative wall: Colorado, Kansas, Maine, Tennessee, Utah - and even California.

But they just keep trying.

Source: cnn.com

Local News Briefs

Overall, 21% of gay or bisexual boys said they had used steroids, versus 4% of straight boys. The difference was similar among those who reported moderate use - taking steroid pills or injections up to 40 times: 8% of gay or bi teens reported that amount, versus less than 2% of straight boys. The heaviest use - 40 or more times - was reported by 4% of gays or bi boys, compared with less than 1% of straight teens.

The study is billed as the first to examine the problem; previous research has found similar disparities for other substance abuse.

DC Solar Solution, a California company that paid Burkman $30,000 in the fourth quarter of 2013, told TIME it was severing ties. “DC solar does not condone or support Mr. Burkman’s homophobic views, and since learning about his misguided efforts to write legislation banning gay athletes from the NFL, we have ended our relationship with him,” wrote DC Solar executives Jeffery Carpoff and Paulette Carpoff in a statement. “As a company working to address issues about our country’s future, we have no intention of working with those stuck in the past.”

“It’s a bit sad that we saw such a large health disparity, especially among the most frequent steroid users,” said co-author Aaron Blashill, a psychologist and scientist with the Fenway Institute, the research arm of a Boston health center that treats gays and lesbians. “Given the dramatic disparity … it would seem that this is a population in which greater attention is needed.”

Burkman argued, [this] “is about re-enforcing and protecting American values of decency and civility. Should NFL players shower with NFL cheerleaders? Certainly not. Given this, why should straight NFL players shower with gay NFL players?”

The nationally representative study is an analysis of government surveys from 2005 and 2007, involving 17,250 teen boys aged 16 on average; almost 4% - 635 boys - were gay or bisexual. Blashill said it’s likely more recent data would show the disparities persist.

Richard C. Duke, Ph.D., founder and acting CEO of ApopLogic, a company working to cure lung cancer, which paid Burkman upwards of $20,000 in 2013, called Burkman “a tasteless, self-promoting, hatemonger.” This isn’t Burkman’s first anti-gay foray. On his website, he has links to his radio show where he encourages families to yank their children out of the Boy Scouts after that group decided to allow gay scouts, but not gay scout leaders.

Dr. Rob Garofalo, adolescent medicine chief at Lurie Children’s Hospital in Chicago, said the differences aren’t surprising, since it is known that gay youth often have “body image issues.” But, he said, “It is still shocking.

These are dramatically high rates.”

Side effects can include heart and liver problems, high blood pressure, acne and aggressive behavior. Kids are often less open about using steroids than about drinking or smoking marijuana, but the study helps raise awareness and the results suggest it’s a topic physicians should be raising with their patients, especially gay and bi kids, Garofalo said.

Are you really asking that ridiculous question, you bigoted bozo?!

Meanwhile, Burkman’s biggest critic is his openly gay brother, Seattle anesthesiologist Dr. James Burkman, who tweeted at his brother: “Having your head up your ass seems quite gay to me. No?” Touché!

Source: swampland.time.com

Must homos mimic hetero bad behavior?!

Source: healthland.time.com

EQCA Announces Legislative Package Ensuring Equality Throughout Life

Attempt to Repeal the School Success and Opportunity Act Fails

Equality California is sponsoring seven bills for the 2014 legislative session that would improve equality for LGBTQ Californians from cradle to grave.

The effort to repeal the School Success and Opportunity Act—California’s new law ensuring that all children have opportunities to do well in school—failed to qualify for the ballot, being thousands of signatures short.

“These bills touch on every aspect of life, from birth through school, doctor’s visits, marriage, even respect after death—all the major milestones of life,” said John O’Connor, EQCA executive director. “With this package of bills, we’re moving from a focus on marriage equality to full equality.”

These bills would: Modernize birth certificates: AB 1951, authored by Assemblymember Jimmy Gomez, would allow parents to choose to selfdesignate as “father,” “mother” or “parent,” eliminating inaccurate designations and confusion for same-sex parents.

Protect students: SB 840, authored by Senator Ricardo Lara, moves forward on recommendations from 2013’s statewide audit on school safety and nondiscrimination laws, to hold schools accountable for documenting responses to bullying and referring students to appropriate services.

End youth group discrimination: SB 323, the Youth Equality Act, authored by Lara, is a two-year bill introduced in 2013 clarifying that nonprofit youth organizations will only be rewarded with special tax exemptions if they comply with California’s existing nondiscrimination laws.

Clean up marriage language: SB 1306, authored by Senator Mark Leno, brings California statutory law into line with last June’s Supreme Court decision restoring the freedom to marry in California. References to “husband” and “wife” would be replaced with gender-neutral language such as “spouse” to recognize all married couples throughout California code.

Ensure health care providers know LGBTQ health: AB 496, authored by Assemblymember Rich Gordon, is a two-year bill introduced in 2013.

End the “panic” defense: AB 2501, authored by Assemblymember Susan Bonilla, would eliminate the so-called “gay panic” and “trans panic” defenses—outrageous tactics used by defendants who claim their violent acts were triggered by the victim’s sexual orientation or gender identity.

Ensure accurate death certificates: AB 1577, the Respect After Death Act, authored by Assemblymember Toni Atkins, would make sure death certificates for transgender Californians accurately reflect their authentic, lived identity.

With a total of 96 bills passed prior to the 2014 session, passing these seven would bring that total to 103, making EQCA the first LGBTQ advocacy organization to pass more than 100 bills. .Story by Dennis McMillan 2

BAY TIMES MARCH 6 , 2 0 1 4

The law, also known as Assembly Bill 1266, went into effect on Jan. 1, ensuring that schools have the guidance they need to make sure all students, including those who are transgender, have the opportunity to do well in school and graduate.

It is modeled after policies and practices that are already working well in several schools, and gives important guidance to educators so they can work with students and families on a case-by-case basis.

Oakland’s Redwood Heights School is among the California schools with policies in place that provide transgender young people with fair chances. Like other schools with similar policies across the state, the policy has been successful since it was established five years ago. “We want our students to know that when they walk onto this campus, they are welcomed for who they are,” said Redwood Heights Principal Sara Stone.

The Support All Students campaign comprises a broad coalition of nearly 100 state and national organizations supporting the new law. The coalition includes Equality California, Transgender Law Center, National Center for Lesbian Rights, ACLU of California, Gay-Straight Alliance Network, L.A. Gay & Lesbian Center, Gender Spectrum, LGBTQ organizations, racial justice organizations, statewide teacher and parent organizations, and others committed to ensuring that all kids have the opportunity to do well in school and graduate.

“This law gives schools the guidelines and flexibility to create an environment where all kids have the opportunity to learn,” said Transgender Law Center Executive Director and Campaign Chair Masen Davis. “We need to focus on creating an environment where every student is able to do well and graduate. This law is about doing what’s best for all students—that’s why it’s supported by school boards, teachers, and the PTA.” “The good thing that comes out of this misguided referendum effort is that we were able to continue to educate people,” said Assemblyman Tom Ammiano, author of AB1266. “It’s important that we begin to understand what transgender students are going through.”

Story by Dennis McMillan

New and Improved Chris Culliver um wines from Boisset Wine Living, delectable food by McCalls Catering, a live and silent auction featuring unique and exciting items plus experiences and, of course, the city’s a-list dogs.

Culliver did just that, and recently took time to discuss the matter, as well as his life over these past several months, in an exclusive interview with the San Francisco Bay Times. He told us that he visited the headquarters of The Trevor Project and did a training workshop with some of the leaders of the organization. “I learned about the trials and tribulations affecting the community,” he said, adding, “I made some friends and committed to being a mentor and volunteer for the organization.”

Commenting on the Champion of Compassion award, Culliver told the Bay Times: “I want to thank all of the people of the SPCA for honoring me and I would love for all of you to support my mission of providing safety and welfare for animals in the inner city. Please learn more about my foundation by visiting chr iscull iver29.com. A l so, plea se come out and support me on April 5th at 10am at the Santa Clara Fairgrounds for my f irst fundraising event. I plan to have a dog show, some kids’ games, and some of my teammates will come out for autographs and a good time.”

“As for me, I have been working all year on training and becoming better as an athlete and as a person, and I truly thank all of your readers for the support and for the forgiveness.” better treatment of animals in inner city communit ies around the country. Also, we hope to encourage youths and adults in need to use animals as companions and advocate for better protection of them.”

We asked him to share his thoughts about athletes, like NBA basketball star Jason Collins of the Brooklyn Nets and football defensive end Michael Sam, publicly coming out.

Culliver said, “I applaud Michael and Jason for their courage. I have absolutely no problem playing and interacting with someone from the LGBTQ community and look forward to connecting with Michael soon on some projects.”

Do you believe that Culliver has, as he indicates, undergone a change of heart? Think again about educationboth in the classroom and via experiences- being a powerful tool, and about how it has impacted you and others. Culliver had a difficult start in life. Raised by a single mother, he experienced the trauma of having his stepfather and a cousin shot to death.

His mother was also wounded. He rose out of poverty, working hard to cultivate his talent. Drafted by the San Francisco 49ers right out of the University of South Carolina, Culliver is now just 25 years old. He is reaching out to the LGBT community as he learns more about us. It is

“Hosting the Bark & Wine Ball in support of the Cinderella Fund is the highlight of our year,” notes CLAW president Judy Ranzer. “Not only do we all participate in saving lives at the Bark & Whine Ball, we also get to put on our finest attire and have an enchanted evening with friends.”

PHOTO SOURCE: GUIDE DOGS FOR THE BL IND

Nelson Mandela once said, “Education is the most powerful weapon you can use to change the world.” Such change begins with individuals, and becomes all the more important for influential role models like sports star Chris Culliver. Last year, we reported on Culliver’s Super Bowl Media Day interview that included widelypublicized derogatory remarks about the gay community. John Chen, the founder and team captain of the San Francisco Bay Crash football team for gay men said, in part, at the time: “We hope that Chris Culliver takes this experience as an opportunity to learn.”

now up to us to non-judgmentally try to learn more about him, and about others who come from backgrounds that may be different from our own.

Growing up, Culliver could not have any pets. He told us, “My interest in animals began when I was little. I had a huge interest in pets, but could not have any types of animals in the house, but I was naturally a huge lover.” As soon as he could, he adopted several dogs and has also had pet ferrets. His interest in animals, as well as child welfare, led to The Chris Culliver Foundation. It was founded last year, he said, “as a way to support the

He cont inued, “The foundation stands firm in opposition of dog fighting and any forms of animal cruelty. The foundation has supported Guide Dogs for the Blind in the past, and we are currently seeking organizations to suppor t w it h similar values as ours. We plan to hold a clinic at the Hunter’s Point YMCA and develop mobile stations to go to inner city communities around the world a nd t reat animals for medical issues and promote healthy living practices with animals.”

In recognition of his efforts, the SF SPCA organiza-

tion Critter Lovers at Work (CLAW) recently announced that it is honoring Culliver with its Champion of Compassion award. Culliver will accept the award at the 18th Annual Bark & Whine Ball in San Francisco next week. All proceeds from the evening, which is CLAW’s single largest fundraising event, benefit the SF SPCA’s Cinderella Fund. This fund restores the health of the most severely injured and unwell homeless animals of the SF SPCA by paying for the cost of top-notch medical care.

Last year, more than 400 guests and 200 of their furry companions attended t he e vent . T h i s year’s ball will include music by DJ Dave Kim, premi-

Cu l l iver is a lso look ing for ward to the 49ers’ upcoming season. In August of last year, he tore a knee ligament dur ing team dr ills at a training camp. A fter undergoing surgery, he was out for the entire 2013 sea son. But t hat wa s t hen and this is now.

“I just want our fans to know that we are putting every ef fort in winn i ng a nd get t i ng a Super B owl ring,” he said. “As for me, I have been working all year on training and becoming better as an athlete and as a person, and I truly thank all of your readers for the support and for the forgiveness.”

18th Annual Bark & Whine Ball March 13, 2014, at 6:30 pm Fort Mason Center, Festival Pavilion, San Francisco For tickets and additional information, please phone 415-522-3535 or visit www.clawsf.org

BAY T IM ES M ARC H 6, 2014

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Holding Up Half the Sky While Carrying the Village Water Supply: International Women’s Day 2014 As American women continue to strive for workplace and pay equity, reproductive rights, and safety against violence, perhaps we might soon join the ranks of other countries who have at least achieved the election of women as Prime Minister, Chancellor, and other heads of state by electing our first woman as President of the United States of America.

Guest Contributor Andrea Shorter Women hold up half the sky. - Mao Zedong March is Women’s History Month, which also marks International Women’s Day on March 8, 2014.

The earliest adoption of an International Women’s Day (IWD) is recorded to have started in 1911 in Austria, Denmark, Germany, and Switzerland in extension of the protests for peace against an impending World War I, the women’s suffrage for voting rights, rights to work, and to end discrimination on the job. It wasn’t until mid-century in 1945 that the Charter of the United Nations was signed as the first international agreement to promote gender equity between women and men.

Of course, there is more to the back story of what has become one of the most inspiring days of the year to reflect on the various statuses of women the world over. IWD provides an opportune time to ceremonially recognize the social, professional, vocational and political advances women have made over the past Century.

IWD is also a time to redirect and replenish our resources towards the continual efforts to eliminate the social, economic, environmental, and other barriers that stand in the way of achieving 100% gender equity.

During his last State of the Union address, President Obama quite directly called out the facts regarding the longstanding struggle for pay equity for American women: “Today, women make up about half our workforce. But they still make 77 cents for every dollar a man earns.

That is wrong, and in 2014, it’s an embarrassment. A woman deserves equal pay for equal work. She deserves to have a baby without sacrificing her job. A mother deserves a day off to care for a sick child or sick parent without running into hardship – and you know what, a father does, too. It’s time to do away with workplace policies that belong in a Mad Men episode. This year, let’s all come together – Congress, the White House, and businesses from Wall Street to Main Street – to give every woman the opportunity she deserves.

Because I firmly believe when women succeed, America succeeds.”

Round About

Meanwhile, the City and County of San Francisco’s Commission on the Status of Women maintains its stronghold as being the first and one of a handful of municipal and/or county government off icials in the nation that is working diligently with local government agencies to promote and implement the gender equity principles of the Convention to Eliminate All Forms of Discrimination Against Women, also widely regarded as an international bill of rights for women.

Of the 194 U.N. Members, 184 have ratified CEDAW. The United States remains one of the 7 countries, including Somalia, Iran, South Sudan, Sudan, Tonga, and Palua, to have yet to ratify this important treaty on women’s rights.

Globally, there remain so many aged challenges that women continue to face in this developing, technologically-driven 21st Century in pursuit of equality, that it admittedly can at times seem daunting, even for the most ardent champions of feminist principles and action.

Recent reports by Amnesty International, the US Census Bureau, the Women’s Learning Partnership, and the U.N. Development Program present some ‘reality-check’ facts on the status of women to ponder. Among them: - Women perform 66% of the world’s work, but receive only 11% of the world’s income, and own only 1% of the world’s land.

- Women make up 66% of the world’s illiterate adults.

-Sub-Sahara African women spend an average of about 200 million hours per day collecting water, amounting to 40 billion hours per year.

- Women account for 55% of all college students, but even when women have equal years of education it does not translate into economic opportunities or political power.

- There are six million more women than men in the world.

- Two-thirds of the world’s children who receive less than four years of education are girls. Girls represent nearly 60% of the children not in school.

- Wars today affect civilians most, since they are civil wars, guerrilla actions and ethnic disputes over territory or government. Three out of 4 fatalities of war are women and children.

- Rape is consciously used as a tool of genocide and a weapon of war. Tens of thousands of women and girls have been subjected to rape and other sexual violence since the crisis erupted in Darfur in 2003. There is no evidence of anyone being convicted in Darfur for these atrocities.

Gender-based violence kills one in three women across the world and is the biggest cause of injury and death to women worldwide, causing more deaths and disability among women aged 15 to 44 than cancer, malaria, traffic accident, and war.

When f leeing violence, or spending the majority of your waking hours hauling ‘clean’ water supply for your village and family, the time to ‘lean in’ towards gaining mobility in the digital divide proposes a totally abstract luxury.

As LGBT people struggling for civil and human rights, we should be very concerned about each and every one of these barriers towards gender equality. The causes and consequences of these and many other harrowing realities intersect, and intertwine into the very tapestry of LGBT liberation movement.

We stand in solidarity with our brothers and sisters in Russia, Uganda, Nigeria, Cameroon, India, and in other parts of the world where severely draconian policies and war-like actions are violently attacking our most basic human rights to peacefully exist as LGBT people. In tandem with these political wars remains the fact that in some countries, rape and torture of lesbians or women thought to be lesbian is sanctioned as a means to ‘correct’ their same sex orientation.

Stopping the atrocity of ‘corrective rape’ is not just women’s issue, it’s an LGBT issue. As more LGBT people seek to f lee persecution from antigay forces to secure asylum in more humane societies, the imperative for building coalition on just this singular matter of urgency is gravely apparent.

Ultimately, gender equity in all manner, shape and form -- for women, girls, LGBT people, for all people -- is a fundamental human rights issue. International Women’s Day is the perfect day to re-dedicate ourselves to all eliminating all barriers towards safety, economic opportunity, education, access to health care, and equity for women and girls all around our world.

Andrea Shorter is the Vice-President of the Commission on the Status of Women in San Francisco. She is a co-founder of the International Museum of Women (imow.org) and the former president of the SF Chapter of the National Organization for Women, Standing Against Global Exploitation, and La Casa de las Madres.

— Rallies in Support of Women – Photos by Rink

The organization One Billion Rising organized rallies on Saturday, February 14, in cities throughout the US and in other nations to protest violence against women. Videos of the actions held at San Francisco City Hall and other cities can be viewed on the website onebillionrising.org. Bay Times photographer Rink captured images from the event. Speakers included Emily Murase, SF School Board member and executive director of the SF Commission on the Status of Women.

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Alzheimer’s/Dementia Caregiving & Connection: You Are Not Alone on This Journey i n g w it h A D. T h i s e st i m at e i s specif ically related to A D, which accounts for 50 to 80 percent of dementia cases.

Aging in Community Erica J. Erney Consider this scenario: Your partner of 40 years was diagnosed with dementia 5 years ago. You have been caring for her alone all of this time. You feel isolated, stressed and do not know where to find help. You are similar in age to your partner, and you have your own health issues to deal with as well. Being Internet savvy, you decide to surf the net when you have a spare minute, and find a link from Alzheimer’s Association about an LGBT dementia caregiver support group. You tear up, relieved and scared, and decide to attend the next group. This connection with others facing similar challenges begins a new chapter of your caregiving journey.

Such a story is among many that demonstrate how connection can be one of the most valued aspects of attending a support group. For nearly 3 years, I have had the honor of facilitating a support group specifically for LGBT caregivers of persons with dementia.

This group is co-sponsored by Alzheimer’s Association, Openhouse, and Institute on Aging. The group provides LGBT caregivers with the opportunity to gain knowledge about dementia, improve access to healthcare, discuss financial concerns, legal concerns, long-term care, end-of-life care, dual caregiving roles and learning and finding ways to take care of themselves as a care partner, as well as connecting to community resources and getting help.

Tears of relief are often a theme i n our suppor t g roup. It is ver y com mon for L GBT older adu lt s to be a lone i n c a r i ng for t hei r loved ones. T hey may have i n itially reached out for assistance, but wer e u n s uc c e s s f u l i n f i nd ing LGBT af f irming ser v ices for t hei r s pec i f ic need s. T hey may h ave b e en fe a r f u l ab out b e i n g separated from t heir pa r t ner or for m i s t r e at ment b e c au s e t he y a r e L GB T. M a n y p a r t ic i p a nt s of the support group feel a sense of i s ol at ion a nd fe a r l i n g er i n g from the earlier years of the A IDS epidemic.

According to the A lzheimer’s Associat ion, dement ia is a genera l term for a decline in mental abilit y, s e ver e enou gh t o i nt er fer e w it h d a i ly l i fe. Memor y los s i s an example. A lzheimer’s disease (A D) is the most common type of dementia. When the f irst wave of baby boomers reaches age 85 (in 2031), it i s projected t hat more than 3 million people age 85 and older are likely to have A D. It has been estimated, by 2020, that the tot a l popu lat ion of older adu lt s in San Francisco living with A D will be 26,774. Using the city’s 12 percent estimate of the LGBT senior population, it can be projected that, by 2020, approx imately 3, 213 LGBT sen iors w i l l be l iv-

M a ny L GBT people have ex per ienced d i f f icu lt a nd a l ienat i ng relationships with family, friends, employers and ser vice providers.

Some have felt the need to move away from their families of origin, to stay in the closet, or to distance t hemselves from d iscr i m i nat i ng and prejudiced situations. W hen compa red to t hei r heterosex ua l counterparts, LGBT older adults are twice as likely to age as a single person, twice as likely to live alone, and three to four times less likely to have children to support t hem. For LGBT elders of color and transgender elders, they have more barriers to accessing healthcare and community resources.

L G B T p e o p l e a r e mor e l i k e l y than heterosexuals to simultaneously care for a partner, friend or person from their family of origin and need support in f inding ways to balance dual caregiving roles.

It can be a challenge to attend to one’s own physical, emotional, social and spiritual well being while providing care to one or multiple individuals.

Navigating community resources c a n b e c h a l len g i n g, yet L GB T a f f i r m i n g s er v ic es for c a r eg ivers of persons with dementia are i nc rea s i ng a nd becom i ng more accessible. For example, the suppor t g roup I faci l it ate has been s uc c e s s f u l i n pr ov id i n g a n i n person group for LGBT dementia ca reg iver s i n t he Bay A rea. A lzheimer’s Association and Openhouse a re co - sponsor i ng Ba sics of A lzheimer’s and Dementia for LGBT Care Partners, a webinar for our com mu n it y. It ha s been schedu led for T hur sday, M a rch 20, 2014 from 2-3 PM. To reg ister online, go to: webinar.kintera. org/LGBT2 or contact A lzheimer’s A ssociat ion. They have also set up a n on l i ne com mu n it y to provide open discussion for caregivers about their questions, concerns, needs and just to vent with each other and service providers.

Caregiving may be isolating, but you are not alone. There is help and hope in the community to enable you to connect w it h ot hers who are on a similar journey. *Dr. Marcy Adelman has presented r ecom mend at ion s on L GBT A l z h e i m e r ’s/d e m e nt i a c a r e t o t he San Francisco LGBT A g ing Policy Task Force. Task force recommendat ions w ill be presented to the Board of Super v isors this spring. Look for future announcements about the LGBT Aging Policy Task Force recommendations and presentations in the Aging in Community column.

Erica J. Erney, a licensed clinical social worker, works as a geriatric case manager at the Memory Clinic for Kaiser Permanente, Santa Clara Medical Center. She is a Diversity and Inclusion Committee Member at Alzheimer’s Assoc iat ion , Northe r n Califor nia & Northern Nevada Chapter. Erica volunteers in her role as facilitator for the co-sponsored LGBT dementia caregiver support group. E-mail: Erica.Erney@ kp.org

LGBT A f f irming Resources • O pen house: open house- sf. org/ •Institute on Aging: www.ioaging.org/ • S AGE: w w w. s a g eu s a .or g/ about/ •Nat iona l Resou rce C enter on L GB T A g i n g : w w w. l gbtagingcenter.org/ •Memor y Cl inic, K a iser Per ma nente Cla r a Med ica l Center: mydoctor.kaiser permanente.org/ncal/facilities/ r e g i o n /s a n t a c l a r a /a r e a _ master/depar t ments/memo ryclinic/index.jsp A lzheimer’s A ssociat ion Programs and Services: www.alz.org/norcal/ •24/7 Helpl ine: 1(8 0 0) 2723900 •Support Groups •Educational Programs • On l i ne Commun it y: w w w. a l zhei mer sblog.org/lgbt-fo rum •Safety Services

Dr. Marcy Adelman oversees the new Bay Times Aging in Community column. For her summary of current LGBT senior challenges and opportunities, please go to: sf baytimes. com/challenges-and-opportunties

Basics of Alzheimer’s and Dementia for LGBT Care Partners

The Alzheimer’s Association presents Basics of Alzheimer’s and Dementia for LGBT Care Partners. Learn more about dementia and caregiving concerns for you and your partner.

Time: 2 - 3 pm Date: Thursday, March 20 To register online, go to http://webinar.kintera.org/LGBT2.

For more info, contact Edie Yau at eyau@alz.org or 800.272.3900.

WWW.ALZ.ORG | 800.272.3900

I still collect

art,

but not as

fast as I collect friends.

For a retiree, psychotherapist Dr. Lu Chaiken is pretty busy. She still sees clients. She attends seminars and parties at The Sequoias, goes to the opera and symphony, and dines with her many friends in the community. So what has Dr. Chaiken retired from? Cooking, cleaning and worrying about her future health care. If that sounds appealing, maybe it’s time for you to get busy, too. Call Candiece at (415) 351-7900 to learn more.

A Life Care Community 415.922.9700 sequoias-sf.org 1400 Geary Boulevard

This not-for-profit community is part of Northern California Presbyterian Homes and Services. License# 380500593 COA# 097.

BAY T IM ES M ARC H 6, 2014 Job # / Name: NCPHS-997 SSF Chaiken BayTimes Jan 9

Date: 12/31/13

Publication: Bay Times

Issue date: Jan 9, 2014

Due at pub: 1/2/14

5

Real Estate and Design

The Cost of Waiting

Real Estate Mark Penn

(median price, surveyed rate), you paid $548,890, and had a mortgage payment (principle and interest, or P&I) of $1972 per month. If you bought that same median priced home in January of 2014, you paid $630,470, and your monthly payment was $2556.

I’m going to start with some assumptions. I will use a purchase price that is the California Associations of REALTORs® (CAR) median price for single family homes in the SF Bay area. I’ll also assume a down payment of 20%, with the remainder being financed at a rate reflected in Freddie Mac’s Primary Mortgage Market Survey.

If we believe what most of the forecasters are telling us about the coming year, in Januar y 2015, your same median-priced house will cost $661,994 and your mortgage (P&I) payment will be $2843. That’s $871 higher than it was in January of 2013. And, if you had bought when you started thinking about it in 2013, but waited until January of 2015 to pull the trigger, you would have been spending over $10,000 less in mortgage payments for that same home every year, assuming no crises along the way. (That expectation regarding interest rates uses an average of the projections by the MBA, FHMA and FMNA.) But what happened between 2013 and now is water under the bridge; those times are gone, even though they are still very large in our rear-view mirror. On the other hand, the forecasts for the next nine months are very much in our view and look to be pretty accurate.

Here’s how that spells out. If you bought a home in January of 2013

What, then, does this tell us? To a degree, there is some crystal-balling

“Sure I want to get into the real estate market, but I just don’t think it’s the right time.” Boy, have I heard that one a lot! And everyone is certainly entitled to their opinion; I’ll never deprive anyone of that, although I have been known to try to change a mind or two along the way. But – is this the right time to buy? Let’s look at some numbers, with the provision that this exercise will only use numbers and forecasts, and is not meant to represent any specific property or transaction.

going on here. That having been said, what was forecast in the last couple of years has come true, and it’s likely that the near future will continue to perform as expected. If you were on the edge of affording a median-priced home a year ago, you probably can’t afford it now. And if you are on the edge now, unless your income changes significantly, you likely won’t be able to afford it next year.

Perhaps, more importantly, look at the money you are leaving on the table. Now seems to be “the time” for many reasons, not the least of which is that interest rates and prices will rise.

It has taken a while, but they are moving now, and as the government exits some of its support of the mortgage market, and private investors step in further, you can bet that those rates will go up further. Stockholders are hungry and must be fed.

If there’s one thing I am not, it’s a hard-sell kind of agent. My clients will tell you that I don’t push. But, if ever there was a time for me to be gently nudging, that time is now.

A Bay Area native, Mark Penn has been a REALTOR® with Coldwell Banker since 2004. He is also active in animal welfare, and is a former educator, facilitator, and air traffic controller. Mark can be reached at mark@MyHomeInSonoma.com.

Current Market Conditions Just Ahead of Spring

R EA LTOR .COM

Real Estate John Wesley Let’s talk about current market conditions. Here we are at the end of winter, just realizing that spring is only weeks away. Buyers, sellers and their agents are challenged to keep up with the pace of our fast changing real estate market. The concept of supply and demand is in full swing; inventory is very low, and buyers are plentiful!

Rates are excellent, cash is abundant, multiple offers are common with any well priced and presented property, and our economy has been in recovery mode for more than a year.

What is your learning curve?

Sellers: In a seller’s world, having an understanding of the power of investing in the presentation of your home is key. Think beyond paint, flooring, staging, and landscaping; these are only the basics. With proper aesthetic choices and budgeting, you not only

affect how many views your home gets online before buyers ever step foot inside, you also absolutely affect the offers on the table. If you have a less than perfect home, now is the time to sell.

Buyers: Be courageous, buyers! The difference between writing 1, 5, or 10 offers directly is connected to being committed to the process. This is not the time to put your toe in the water to get a feel for the market. It’s hot!

Being prepared, and doing your due diligence, are expectations for success. Use a local lender, be approved (minus the requirements of the actual home and appraisal) and conduct preinspections where possible. When all is said and done, whether you get your offer accepted or live to tour another set of Sunday open houses, write your offer conf idently and strategically.

You are investing in the place you will call home for you and your family for a long time.

How savvy are you when it comes to making life altering decisions like selling or buying a home? As your Realtor, I am your advocate, advisor and your liaison between all of the various parties in the process. You are the decision makers. Together, we can navigate what is sure to be an exciting season in East Bay real estate. Here’s to the success of our relationship, measured by accomplishing your real estate goals!

John Wesley, a realtor at The Grubb Company, has over twelve years of real estate industry experience defined by exceptional professionalism and client service. He and his partner Gene Boomer, along with dogs Smokey and Coco, live in the East Bay.

• See more News & Stories @ sfbaytimes.com • 6

BAY TIMES MARCH 6 , 2 0 1 4

Real Estate and Design

The Art of French Kitchen Design

Project Remodel Jim Tibbs

First off, let me clarify what is unique about European kitchens. Anyone who has travelled abroad knows that European hotel rooms tend to be smaller than those in the U.S. The same is true for residential spaces and kitchens, especially in urban centers like Paris. Most of the existing residential buildings in Paris were built in the late 19th century as part of the Haussmann renovation plan commissioned by Napoleon III. Fortunately, the cit y planners of Paris were not inf luenced by the urba n renewa l craze t hat swept most A mer ican cities in the 50’s and 60’s. As a result, kitchens in Europe are designed for smaller, more compact 19th century spaces ver sus t he la rger spaces t hat have become the norm in the U.S. There are several specif ic qualit ies that European desig ned kitchens share: E a se of a c c es s ibi l it y-T he m a i n premise of European design is to br ing t he k itchen to t he user as opposed to the user having to visit multiple work stations to prepare a meal. A f loor plan that positions t he most f requent ly u sed item s within easy reach is the primar y objective.

Ef fective use of space-Since space is at a premium, European kitchens are designed to be highly ef-

PHOTOS COURT ESY OF J IM T IBBS

Philip and I just returned from a “fabuleux” two-week vacation in Paris. In order to have a richer and more varied experience, we rented an apartment near the Eiffel Tower for the first week, and then moved to an apartment in Le Marais for the second week. This strategy was a great way to experience two distinct neighborhoods in Paris. It also gave me the opportunity to try out two Europeanstyle kitchens in person.

f icient. Parisians shop more often and buy locally from the plethora of markets t hat are scattered about t he cit y. K itchens are not des ig ned for t he bu l k shoppi ng that is prevalent in the U.S. Compact appl iances- One of t he most noticeable dif ferences in European kitchens is the use of 24” wide appliances versus the 30 -36” appliances used in America. I did most of the cooking in Paris, and was pleasa nt ly sur pr ised by t he comfor t of using a 24” cooktop, ref r iger ator a nd oven. A not her key dif ference is the lack of a garbage disposal, which opens up a host of possibilities for optimizing the space under the sink. Europeans also have embraced the use of a combination washer/dr yer that eliminates one appliance from the mix.

States. Europeans are accustomed to u s i ng h igh ly ef f ic ient appl iances that take longer to complete their tasks. This is especially true for dishwashers, washers and dryer s t hat a re used on a frequent basis.

Cost ef f iciency-Because the physical space is smaller, the cost of a k itchen renovat ion is less in Europe than in the U.S. Europeans tend to invest in better quality f ixtures and f inishes to create a v isua l ly st r i k i ng space t hat is also designed for optimal convenience, accessibility and ef f iciency, a strateg y that would benef it many American homes as well.

J im T ibbs is the creative director of HDR Remodeling. If you would like to learn more, please read his blog at hdrremodeling.wordpress.com or follow him on Twitter @HDRremodeling1.

E n e r g y e f f i c i e n c y -T he c o s t o f electr icit y in Europe is bet ween 50% and 30 0% h igher t han t he cost of elect r icit y in t he Un ited

BAY T IM ES M ARC H 6, 2014

7

You Have to Change So I Can Love You home begins to feel more like a battlefield than a haven of safety and love.

It’s an all-too-predictable pattern.

Kim Corsaro Publisher 1981-2011

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Writers Rink, Sister Dana Van Iquity, Ann Rostow, Kirsten Kruse, Kate Kendell, Pollo del Mar, Heidi Beeler, K. Cole, Gary M. Kramer, Dennis McMillan, Tom Moon, Paul E. Pratt, Terry Baum, Gypsy Love, Rafael Mandelman, Shelley MacKay, Kit Kennedy, Leslie Katz, Karen Williams, Gary Virginia, Stu Smith, Zoe Dunning, Jim Tibbs, Mark Penn, Marcy Adelman, Stuart Gaffney & John Lewis Brandon Miller & Joanne Jordan, Kippy Marks, Naomi Jay, John Wesley, Jamie Leno Zimron Thom Watson Photographers Rink, Dennis McMillan, Steven Underhill, Phyllis Costa, Cathy Blackstone, Robert Fuggiti, Bill Wilson, Jo-Lynn Otto

Examined Life Tom Moon, MFT After years of searching, you find “the one” and merge with each other in what seems like perfect love. But, after a little time passes, you begin to notice the ways—large and small—that things aren’t so perfect after all.

Your partner runs the dishwasher every day, whistles Christmas carols year round, or loves “Little House on the Prairie” reruns. S/he is a spendthrift or intolerably cheap. You are a neat freak, but your other half is a total slob. And so on. You begin to suspect that you’re “settling,” and start to wonder if the grass is greener somewhere else. You go on a campaign to fix your partner’s personality and change his or her bad habits. You begin to see the person you love as a human reclamation project, and your

No one has researched how couples interact in more depth than psychologist John Gottman. Based on many hundreds of hours of filming couples interact with one another in a specially fabricated apartment in Seattle, he learned to predict, with 91 percent accuracy, who will break up and who will stay together.

One of his most interesting discoveries was that the majority of conflicts in successful relationships—69 percent to be exact—are never resolved at all.

To take on a relationship, it seems, is to take on a set of problems. Since no relationship is free of difficulties, in most cases the grass won’t be greener elsewhere. To battle with a partner in the vain hope of “winning,” i.e., getting him or her to change, usually only creates resentment and distance.

Since most disagreements in relationship are rooted in deep personality and value differences, it’s more realistic to learn to live with them with humor and patience, and to be content with small changes and compromises.

The key to successful relationships, Gottman found, isn’t how couples handle disagreements, but how they

are with each other when they aren’t fighting. The most deadly emotion in any relationship is contempt for your partner, and the most effective way to prevent this cancer from poisoning your relationship is to work deliberately and daily at nurturing your fondness and admiration for one another. Without the fundamental belief that your partner is worthy of honor and respect, no basis for a satisfying relationship exists. Moreover, focusing on your feelings of fondness and admiration for your partner is an immediate antidote to contempt, because contempt and admiration can’t both occupy your mind at the same time.

One of the most concrete ways to demonstrate your respect is to let your partner inf luence you. When your partner expresses different opinions, does things in a different way from you, or gives you advice and suggestions, do you respond as if your power and autonomy are being threatened?

Do you resort to criticism, contempt, defensiveness or stonewalling to drown your partner out and obliterate his or her point of view? Or do you listen, discuss and consider what you’re hearing? (Note to male couples: the research shows that men are far more prone to turn disagreements into power struggles than women.)

But how do we resolve the conf licts that can be resolved? Discussions invariably end on the same note they begin. If you initiate discussion of an issue with name-calling, yelling, or accusations, that’s how the conversation will end. Successful conf lict resolution is more likely if you speak calmly and with respect. Complain, but don’t blame. Confront, but don’t attack. Focus on the situation that upsets you, not on your partner’s character. Make statements that start with “I” instead of “You.” For instance, say, “I’d like you to listen to me,” not, “You never listen to me.” Couch your request within an appreciative statement about what your partner has done right in the past. And don’t store things up. If you wait too long before bringing up an issue, it will just escalate in your mind.

It is true that some problems can’t be resolved and not all relationships should continue. Physical violence, for instance, isn’t something anyone should learn to tolerate in a relationship. And there are some issues that can create deadly gridlock unless some livable compromise is discovered. More about that next time.

Tom Moon is a psychotherapist in San Francisco. His website is tommoon.net.

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The Two Spirits LGBT Native American Pow Wow held recently at SOMAR Gallery included ceremonies, dancing, singing and happy mingling. Among those performing were the Queer Danzantes Coalition of Aztec Dancers.

Alone Again…Naturally pressure is on for those of us who are single, either by choice or because it is the most natural positioning for our lives at this time. I fall into both categories.

CALENDAR Event listings for consideration to be included in the Bay Times online or print Calendar section should be sent by e-mail to: calendar@sfbaytimes.com.

LETTERS TO THE EDITOR If you would like to write a letter to the editor with comment on an article or suggestions for the Bay Times, email us at editor@sfbaytimes.com. © 2014 Bay Times Media Company Co-owned by Betty L. Sullivan & Jennifer L. Viegas Reprints by permission only.

Speak Up! Speak Out! Laugh Often!

Karen Williams I know that my friends love me. They let me know in countless ways. Recently, I noticed the looks of concern on some of their faces. It seems as though my single status is troubling to them. I haven’t the slightest reason why!

Certainly the f ight for marriage equality has provoked many folks in partnership to seek more formal unions with their beloveds. Yet, the

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BAY TIMES MARCH 6 , 2 0 1 4

Not only do I enjoy dating but also my lifestyle -- which involves a great deal of travel for work -- is not the most conducive one for a stay-at-home relationship. Even in the early days of my career, I would tell 9-to-5ers who wanted to go out with me on weekends, that I am the entertainment on the weekend! Most of my comedy gigs fall between Friday and Sunday, which means that I wind up dating entrepreneurs, entertainers, or the chronically unemployed, all of whom have more time flexibility.

The first two categories -- entrepreneurs and entertainers -- are like me in that they are usually borderline workaholics who love the work that they do. Since I understand what it’s like to work for one’s self with the devotion of a zealot, these liaisons

are fun for me. Travel is our middle name, and we get to meet up in exotic and big city locales, treat ourselves to luscious meals, and engage in fanciful activities that we can both afford and enjoy. The chronically unemployed, on the other hand, often have “means” issues and require being treated, which works when cash is flowing! Either way, there is no dealing with day-to-day life and, for me, that’s a plus.

You see, it’s the daily regimen that I am not anxious to share. I enjoy the comforts of my own home, a warm, safe, and peaceful sanctuary that greets me after my traveling sojourns.

Upon my return home, I get to chant out loud in front of my Buddhist altar after whispering my prayers on ships, in hotels, and at friends’ places. I love to cook, and one of my joys of being home again is preparing delicious organic meals. I can watch endless reruns of “Everybody Loves Raymond” or “Seinfeld” and the latest season of “Downton Abbey” in silence. I can

rest until I am refreshed, sometimes for 12-16 hours. (There you have it, the secret to my fabulous skin and youthful good looks...sleep!) And the rewards of solitary living go on and on and on.

Not that I don’t imagine myself as coupled, one day. It’s just that, for right now, I like my life the way it is!

Sometimes, I feel that I have to rationalize my solo existence, so I explain that after raising children for decades of my life, my alone time is well deserved. Yet, I don’t need to do that. I can simply assert that, for some of us, being alone naturally is our way of living our best life.

May you strive to live your best life, one day at a time, in the ways that suit you. It’s 2 o’clock in the afternoon as I write this. I’m home again at last, and I feel a nap coming on. Ta Ta! For right now, Karen Williams is a onenote samba! Resonate with her at karen@ sfbaytimes.com

Fortnight in Review

By Ann Rostow Christian Agonistes Last week, as you no doubt witnessed, Arizona governor Jan Brewer vetoed the law that would have allowed business owners to refuse gay clients based on religious freedom. Jan Brewer is not exactly liberal. But from the moment the bill passed the legislature and landed on her desk, she found herself in the middle of a firestorm of near universal condemnation. I’m guessing the scariest moment was when the NFL indicated they might pull the Super Bowl rather than do business in a state that protects overt discrimination by statute.

Quite frankly, I was surprised. The week before the Arizona veto, we saw the conservative head of the Kansas senate kill a similar measure, explaining it went too far even for her GOP majority. That was nice, but I still assumed that these bills were going to run through the rest of Red America’s state legislatures like sharp knives through rare filet mignon. I assumed that the antigay right had settled on an official counterattack to our marriage victories in federal court: cast themselves as the victims of religious oppression and pass a succession of antigay state laws in response.

Now it seems as if the tactic has been defeated before it can get underway.

Yes, some of these bills are still pending. Mississippi has something going.

And maybe Missouri. But other legislatures dropped their efforts once they saw the threat to Arizona’s image and economy. And, like me, the antigay right has been caught off guard.

Commentators like George Will, Rich Lowry and Ross Douthat are now urging the gay community to show a little fair play. It’s not neighborly to insist on service from a well-meaning Christian, Will suggested.

If a gay couple is turned away at the door, wrote Lowry, the market has a ready solution: There are other bakers, photographers and f lorists. The wedding business is not exactly bristling with hostility to gay people. If one baker won’t make a cake for gay weddings, the baker across town can hang a shingle welcoming all couples for all types of weddings.

“This is how a pluralistic society would handle such disputes. Instead, in the cases mentioned above, the gay couples reported the businesses to the authorities for punishment.”

As for Douthat, his recent New York Times op-ed acknowledged that marriage equality was a fait accompli.

And when it happens, then what, he wondered? Will gay activists settle down, enjoy their victory and learn to respect those with different opinions? Or will they push their success to the limit and rudely force the whole country to, um, sell them cakes and flowers? (I paraphrase.)

Sadly for Douthat, it looks as if the mean gays don’t know when to stop.

The “religious freedom” bill in Arizona and others like them, he explains, are actually a “way for religious conservatives to negotiate surrender---to accept same-sex marriage’s inevitability while carving out protections for dissent.

“But now,” he continues with patronizing dismay, “apparently, the official line is that you bigots don’t get to negotiate anymore.”

In fact, the official line is that discrimination against gay men and women is wrong. It’s wrong in marriage, in business, in employment, in housing, wherever. It’s never been negotiable. To oppose a measure that deliberately authorizes antigay bias is not unsportsmanlike or unneighborly.

As for the marketplace in our pluralistic society, it will self-select for bias all by itself, without any help from state legislatures. It’s likely that most gay couples will seek out friendly businesses for their wedding services, through advertising or referrals or just through instinct. I suppose there can never be a statute against giving grudging or rude service to a customer you don’t like. So Christians will always have that option, and I assume most gay clients would respond by turning to a welcoming shingle as Lowry suggests.

But they’ll do it by choice rather than force of law.

My question is this? What will the far right do now? Are they out of strategies? Can they do nothing more than whine about “fairness” and accuse us of running up the score when we’re up seven with three minutes left? We will see.

And f inally, we’re not just talking about bakers and dress shops. Last year, two Oregon lesbians were kicked out of their cab at night on the side of the interstate by a driver who disapproved of them on religious grounds.

A state agency has just determined that the driver violated state law in the process, and a civil rights case will go forward against him. So, Mr. Lowry?

It’s one thing to move on to the bakery down the street with the rainbow sticker in the window. It’s quite another to find a taxi at one in the morning on IH-84.

By the way, the women had been out carousing at a “vegan strip club.”

Only in Portland.

Marry Go Round Most of the news this week, as usual, revolves around our many marriage cases. We had another federal marriage victory, this time in Texas of all places. Friend of the court briefs were filed by some of our GOP allies in the Tenth Circuit. The Attorney General of Kentucky declined to defend the anti-marriage law in the Bourbon State, although the governor will find some other legal team to represent the defense. Various counties in Illinois are allowing marriages even though the state marriage equality law doesn’t go into effect until this summer.

Lambda and the ACLU are trying to join the appeal of our marriage victory in Virginia, since they have a parallel case on track in the Lover’s State. David Boies and Ted Olson are urging the Fourth Circuit to deny this request. Sound familiar? Yes, Olson and Boies are the same advocates who are trying to join the appeal in the Tenth Circuit.

And the beat goes on. If you think marriage dominates the news right now, just wait for this summer and fall when the federal appellate rulings start to drop.

Are The Kids OK? In Michigan, our fight for marriage looks a little different. Earlier, the federal judge in this case ordered a Prop 8-style trial in lieu of ruling as a matter of law and I think we’re on Day Six as I write. One of the witnesses is Mark Regenerus, author of the discredited paper on the children of gay parents.

The University of Texas sociologist studied families in which one parent came out of the closet and determined that the kids from these broken homes fared poorly in comparison to intact families of heterosexual couples.

I can’t remember exactly how the Regenerus research was structured, but it was something like that. But what bugs me is not the bad science; it’s the very idea that marriage rights should stand or fall based on society’s view of who makes a good parent. I know I’ve hashed over this topic in the past, but it annoys me that people on both sides continue to fight over a red herring.

Professional Services You know, two of the Supreme Court’s major rulings on marriage involved demonstrably bad parents. In one, the justices ruled that a state could not deny the right to marry to men who were delinquent on child support from a previous union. In another, they ruled that incarcerated felons had the right to marry, even if the marriage could not be consummated.

I don’t need a sociology study to tell me that children of deadbeat dads and convicts are worse off than most.

And indeed, as I’ve written before, we could argue that millionaire parents or highly educated parents have better outcomes than their poorer or less schooled peers. But just what does this have to do with the right to marry?

Why are we putting gay parents to a test that does not apply to any other couple? And why are we, the gay community, trying to pass the test rather than challenge its premise?

Just sayin’. For the twentieth time. You readers are very patient.

Jack’s Wild I’m certain I have skipped over a number of other marriage news bits, but enough is enough, do you not agree? Let’s just ramble.

It was nice to see Jason Collins get a contract, albeit a short term one, the other day. Too bad he signed with the Nets a few hours after I submitted a column observing that pro teams have little interest in the thirty-something gay journeyman hoopster. I hate that.

And yes, it’s all about me.

I guess Disney has decided to sever its ties with the Boy Scouts, since the Scouts refuse to lift their ban on gay scoutmasters. Gay scouts are now okay, but adult men remain barred.

Two questions: Why do the scouts keep hanging onto the notion that a gay troop leader is likely a pedophile?

And second, if they really believe gay men are sexual predators, why did they go ahead and lift the ban on scouts? They don’t trust a gay man in his 20s or 30s, but a 15 or 16-year-old gay kid is just fine? It doesn’t compute.

And did you read about the Washington lobbyist, Jack Burkman, who said he would draft legislation to ban gay players from the NFL? Burkman, who also used to work for nasty New York pol Rick Lazio, later said he meant only to ban gay men from the communal showers, and later still, he said the whole thing was a joke. Meanwhile, quite a few of his clients are distancing themselves from this K Street creep, and his gay brother, Dr. James Burkman of Seattle, said something ironic about how gay it is for Jack to “stick his head up his ass.”

I was trying to find the exact quote (see more info on the National News Map, page 2) but my computer is having a meltdown that would put a fussy toddler to shame. In the course of my frustrating excursion through cyberchaos, I stumbled upon an ad for burial insurance, which reminds me of something. Have you seen the TV commercial where Dad has fallen off the ladder and all the kids have rushed to meet Mom in the hospital waiting room? Dad comes out looking goofy and apologetic with his arm in a sling, and the next thing you know, all the kids are convincing Mom to buy endof-life insurance to cover funeral costs.

They even volunteer to make the call together and fill out the paperwork.

Cheap little bastards!

Seriously. It would be one thing if the kids recommended more medical insurance in case crazy old Dad takes on another one of his dangerous home improvement projects. But burial insurance isn’t something you suggest to your parents. It doesn’t benefit them.

It benefits you. (continued on page 22)

Read more @www.sfbaytimes.com and check us out on Twitter and Facebook.

BAY T IM ES M ARC H 6, 2014

9

Shaun in San Francisco

I was born in San Francisco General, way back when they referred to it as “The Blood Bath.” Graduating from John O’Connell high school, with a trade certificate in carpentry, much of my classroom time was spent in bungalows. The school was forced to move from the Mission after the Loma Prieta earthquake due to contamination from asbestos, but my passion for learning never faltered.

Old School San Francisco Native Shaun Hassan Haines (Editor’s Note: We are pleased to launch a new column by San Francisco native Shaun Hassan Haines, who has served on the boards of several local LGBT organizations. In the coming weeks, he will address the changing landscape of San Francisco LGBT society, culture and politics.

For this f irst article, however, we asked Shaun to introduce himself to you.)

In those younger years, I fell in love with photography and writing. I wrote for the San Francisco Teen newspaper and was honored to have my poetry published in a few literary anthologies. In college, at San Francisco State University, I pursued Journalism as a field of study. Truthfully, at that age I had a little more fun taking Jazz, Afro-Haitian, and Modern Dance. I’m excited to return to my roots as a writer.

My roots in the city have enabled me to form solid connections. To the Bears, Sisters, Fairies, Techies, Hipsters, Missionites, the Leather communities, and my newest friends in San Francisco’s political circles and more, I say this: you have become my

I am also educated, trained, certified and experienced as an Information Technology, Project and Operations Management professional. In recent

SE AL SB ASE BAL L . N E T

extended family. From the Financial District to the Castro, the Mission to the Richmond, Haight to the Excelsior, the Bayview to Fillmore, SoMa to the Sunset, Ingleside to Hayes Valley, and where I live today in Lower Pacific Heights, San Francisco is and forever will be my home and heart.

years, I joined the Board of Directors at A l ic e B . Tok l a s s er v i n g on the communicat ions committ e e. I volu nt e er at t he B ay a r d R u s t i n C o a l it io n a s a pr oj e c t manager focusing on Organ izat iona l Development. I have a lso served on the Board of Directors at Sa n Fra ncisco P r ide. 2014 is my t h i rd yea r to pa r t ic ipate i n A I DS/L i feCycle. I enjoy working with the community, organizi ng event s, creat i ng commun it y development plans and bui ld ing coa l it ion s. I a m proud to h ave promoted awareness of, and raised over ten thousand dollars of fund ing for, var ious causes. I

have endeavored to do so in ways t hat suppor t a nd h igh l ight ou r heritage, local artists and native cultures.

Here i n t he cit y, our com mun it ies are evolv ing are evolv ing at exponential rates. The inequities of this change for a multitude of groups of all ethnic and economic backgrounds have compelled me to get involved. To obtain a real world education in public service a nd pol it ica l process, I made a conscious decision.

by interacting with all of our diver se g roups. I hope to lead by example and motivate a younger generat ion to joi n me. L et’s a l l participate in shaping the future by ef fect i ng pos it ive cha nge i n our society. The f irst steps on my journey have taught me valuable lessons. I want to thank a l l who have helped me a long t he way, especially the Bay T imes for g iving me a voice and helping me to sha re t he ex per iences a nd pro s pect ive of a n Old S chool Sa n Francisco Native.

T he qu ickest route to fa i lure is not to try.

S h a u n Ha ssa n Ha in es i s a phil a nthropist, community organizer, LGBT activist , Information Technolog y Operations Management professional and photographer. shaunhaines.net/

Some years ago, I vowed to take a n act ive role i n our com mun it y, to help g u ide t hat evolut ion

FoundAtionS SAn FrAnCiSCo

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Morning and evening sessions available Visit FoundationsSanFrancisco.com for more information.

For a confidential assessment, call (866) 972.0321.

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Check out

10

News, Entertainment and more in the BayTimes

BAY TIMES M ARC H 6 , 2 0 1 4

CALENDAR at www.sfbaytimes.com

Health News What’s in the “I” of LGBTQI?

Friends of Naomi Dr. Naomi Jay, RN, NP, PhD In the spirit of inclusion, our rainbow alphabet acronym is LGBTQI, and mostly we are clear what these letters mean. After reading my first article in the Bay Times, David Cameron Strachan, a well-known local intersex activist, wrote to express thanks that I remembered to include the “I” but noted that I was not consistent, sometimes writing LGBTQI and sometimes LGBT. It wasn’t purposeful. I was being a lazy typist, and David was right to point out the admission. I promised to write an article on intersex health issues.

Fortuitously there was a wonderful movie at the Roxie last week, Intersexion. It explored many important issues shared by intersex people, including the secrecy and shame that many are taught from birth, the invasive and frequently poor outcomes of gender “correcting” surgeries often begun in infancy, as well as the difficulties of living in a gender binary system (aka male versus female). All who were prof iled shared stories of isolation, secrecy and shame. Those who were surgically altered described ongoing physical trauma and PTSD.

The official medical term for intersex is Disorders of Sex Development (DSD), hardly politically correct terminology. Abnormalities during fetal development may result in genitalia that do not “match” the baby’s chromosomes, or genitalia that cannot be determined to be male or female.

There are also unusual chromosomal patterns that may not be apparent until the age where puberty usually begins. The incidence of intersex births is estimated at 1 in 4,500, 1 in 2000, or 1 in 1000, depending on definition.

There are more than 15 recognized intersex conditions.

Intersex organizations advocate assigning a gender without surgical interventions until the child can give informed consent. Surgical gender reassignment, or “corrective surgery” based on the appearance of the external genitalia at birth, is falling out of favor. Most medical literature recognizes the ethical concerns of this approach, but the “corrective” surgeries are still being done. Advocacy groups claim that no one has come forth stating that he or she “really appreciates what my doctor did to me when I was a kid,” yet a literature review shows that approximately 50% are pleased with the outcome and/or assigned gender. However, high rates of dissatisfaction with sexual function are reported, especially in women who underwent clitoral amputation.

It is clear that many surgically altered intersex people have ongoing physical and psychological trauma.

People who have been surgically altered do not trust their doctors; many are afraid to see any health care provider. Hormonal therapy also comes with mixed results. Each particular syndrome may have accompanying health care problems.

I asked David what we could do better as a community. David pointed out that we “lump everyone together as ‘gay,’ but only the LGB is about sexual orientation. ‘T’ is about gender identity, and the ‘I’ is about differences of sexual anatomy that don’t fit the stereotypical male or female and have nothing to do with sexual orientation.”

Many intersex, as well as transgender, individuals are not gay-identified.

Further, the LGBTQ community, despite its openness, is also based on a gender binary system. We don’t have problems with people self-identifying to whatever gender they choose, but that still ignores the reality of those who are neither male nor female.

Imagine filling out a driver’s application, or applying for insurance or a job when you are neither. Intersex does not legally exist in those and countless other instances. We therefore need greater recognition of intersex individuals and to do more to include them in our diverse community.

For additional information, please look up Advocates for Informed Choice (w w w.aiclegal.org), or the A c c or d A l l i a n c e , w h i c h h a s a handbook for prov iders and parent s (w w w. a c c or d a l l i a nc e.or g ).

M a ny t ha n k s aga i n to Dav id Ca meron St racha n for ag reei ng to be inter v iewed and enlightening me on the realities of the intersex community.

Dr. Naomi Jay is a nurse practitioner in the department of Infectious Disease at UCSF.

(IDOL continued from page 1)

In addition to competing on American Idol, MK has performed as a singer and guitarist here on the streets of SF. She has also wowed audiences at the Kate Wolf Festival, S a n Fr a n c i s c o Pr ide and t he San Francisco Dyke March.

American Idol or not, s he h a s a n incredible future

As of this writing, MK is still in the competition. Even TV Guide gave her a thumb’s up, saying that MK has “a voice like butter.” Please consider supporting her with your vote! You can vote up to 50 times per contestant. American Idol audiences tend to be conservative (hey, the show runs on Fox), which can affect who wins or not. This makes MK’s presence all the more powerful. As Mindy said, “I think she certainly has brought attention to gay issues for a younger demographic.”

PHOTO COURTESY OF AMERICAN IDOL

Host Ryan Seacrest has mentioned MK’s moms on the program. Mindy said, “I was pleased and gratified that there hasn’t been a big deal about that nationally since. As mothers, we are just like any other mothers. We want our child to be happy and successful. We are so proud of her.”

ahead of her, given her tremendous talent.

Bay Times is proud to support the Rainbow Honor Walk rainbowhonorwalk.org

For information on American Idol voting, please go to: w w w.a mer icanidol.com/vote The Lex ington Club, 3464 19th S t r e et a t L e x i n g t on , h a s a l s o been holding viewing parties and rallies to support MK.

PHOTO COURTESY OF MINDY SPLATT

MK loves many kinds of music, ranging from Disney’s The Little Mermaid to soul singer Allen Stone. A talented original, she was one of 75,000 contestants who auditioned in San Francisco to compete in the thirteenth season of American Idol. For the audition, she sang “If I Were Your Woman” by Gladys Knight & the Pips.

TWITTER @MKNOBILETTE

San Francisco School of the Arts. She attended Buena Vista and Synergy schools, and spent many summers at Camp Tawonga, a bucolic Jewish summer camp located near Yosemite.

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(TECH continued from page 1)

The tech sector has helped many in the City -not just those who work in technology- out of financial hardship.

Restaurants, retail, and transportation workers have all benefitted from these companies coming in. Yet, we all see the increasing inequality, the housing crisis, and the very real concern that what has made our City special is in danger of changing irrevocably. Is it all the fault of the tech sector? Certainly not. The issue is far more complicated than laying the blame on one industry. So how do we balance the positive aspects of the tech industry with its impacts on the City? Can the entry of the tech community into the Castro co-exist with our “gay values?”

PHOTOS BY JO-LYNN OT TO

The adage “the more things change, the more they stay the same” certainly holds true when it comes to the changing face of San Francisco and its neighborhoods. San Francisco has a history of being on the frontier of new things- first the Gold Rush, then the railroads, then banking, the dot com boom…so it is no wonder the tech industry has found a home here. Innovation, creativity, diversity and breaking the norm are all values supported by the tech industry, but also by San Franciscans for generations.

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PHOTO COURTESY OF LESBIANS WHO TECH/LYRA LOPEZ PHOTOGRA

Leanne with some attendees.

San Francisco has been at the forefront as a gateway for immigrants and, of course, a mecca for the LGBT community. Neighborhoods have seen these changes as well. The Mission was once the hub for the Irish American community. As the Mission now struggles with the changes coming from the tech sector, so too does the Castro. Can we find ways to maintain our unique neighborhoods and communities while balancing these changes?

The Castro, like the entire City, is facing a crisis of rising prices—for purchase of a home as well as to rent— which only results in an increased economic divide. We have many longterm residents who are now “millionaires” due to the rise in value of homes

in Noe and the Castro, yet we have many others, including those who are older or ill, in rental units, living in fear of having to move. Who will be coming in to the Castro? Will we lose our sense of place and history, given that individuals like Harvey Milk, Mark Leno, Phyllis Lyon and Del Martin, all broke barriers and came from this community?

We want these technology companies to be successful, for not only have they helped SF on many fronts, but also, these are truly international businesses providing valuable services around the world. These are the kinds of corporations we as LGBT people can find support from, rise through the ranks in, and gain mobility in the work world.

Can we all co-exist? Yes, but we must ensure that we examine the impacts of this influx to keep our city vibrant.

Not only must we work to stop Ellis Act evictions, but also, urge these companies to hire and train women, people from communities of color, immigrants, and the LGBT community.

The City’s finances have benefited from these companies, but we must be vigilant to ensure that we retain our values as a community, ensuring that all are included and given opportunities. Google recently donated funds to enable low-income youth to ride Muni for free. Mark Benioff of Salesforce has been a generous donor to numerous causes, including to the UCSF Children’s hospital. If more companies follow these examples, we can certainly find ways to co-exist and share what has drawn us all to San Francisco.

So how do we protect our community’s values? Addressing the housing crisis is paramount, but also, we must support our local businesses to ensure they can stay in the Castro, support those groups providing for the less fortunate in the community, and make sure we keep this discussion alive. Nobody seems to have all of the answers to our housing crisis—there certainly is not

PHOTO BY JO-LYNN OTTO

Lesbians Who Tech founder Leanne Pittsford (2nd from left) with (left to right) Megan Smith, Taryn Miller-Stevens, Kate Kendell, Joyce Newstat and Kathy Levinson

PHOTO BY JO-LYNN OTTO

This is an industry that is traditionally much more supportive of LGBTQ people, bases opportunity on ability, and indeed, tech companies were amongst the first and loudest voices to demand that the Governor of Arizona veto a homophobic and discriminatory piece of legislation. There is no doubt that the tech industry has helped the Bay Area come back from the economic downturn.

PHOTO COURTESY OF LESBIANS WHO TECH/LYRA LOPEZ PHOTOGRAPHY

The recent “Lesbians Who Tech” summit highlights a dichotomy. The Castro Theatre was filled with over 800 lesbians “and those who love them” listening to a diverse array of speakers from the tech industry offering advice, wisdom, telling their stories, encouraging girls to study engineering and computer science, yet also providing some bleak statistics about the dismally low numbers of women (and obviously, by extension, low numbers of lesbians) in the technology sector. At the summit we heard from women making change by being visible in the technology industry, and “making change in a way you get invited back”- being thoughtful, strategic, intentional and inf luential. The opportunities for LGBT people to work in the technology field were more than apparent.

PHY

this influx have on the Castro, considered the epicenter of our LGBT community?

just one easy fix—but providing security for those in fear of losing their home is important, as is finding ways to create and maintain reasonable cost housing for those in that vanishing “middle income” bracket.

Inequality in SF is growing dramatically.

No one who lives here can deny that. The question is, can we find a balance before it is too late? Placing blame is not a solution. All working to find ways to keep our community strong, vibrant and diverse is essential. We need to quickly figure out how to have it all: a strong economy and a City that supports, embraces and protects its diversity.

Weigh in with ideas that can help.

Commissioner Leslie Katz, current President of the Port Commission, served on the San Francisco Board of Supervisors from 19962001. She convened Health, Multimedia and New Technolog y Summits, and successfully introduced groundbreaking legislation in areas of technology, environment, economic development, human rights and labor. She serves on the boards of numerous community and non-profit organizations including the Victory Campaign Board, Equality California Institute, and New Leaders Council.

Round About – Mardi Gras Bal Masque & Academy of

Friends Oscar Night

PHOTO BY R IN K

PHOTO BY RIN K

PHOTO BY RIN K

PHOTO BY STEV EN UN DERHIL L

The 34th Annual Academy of Friends Awards Night Gala was held at Terra Gallery in San Francisco on Sunday, March 2. The 2014 event’s theme was “Return to the Emerald City.” Representing the Bay Times were photographers Rink and Steven Underhill.

PH OTO B Y ST EV EN UN DER H I LL

PH OTO B Y ST EV EN UN DER H I LL

P H OTO BY R IN K

P HOTO BY S TE VEN UN DER HI LL

PHOTO BY RIN K

PHOTO BY STEVEN UN DERHIL L

K rewe de K i nque held it s a n nua l M a r d i G r a s B a l Masque, entitled Mardi Gras Magick, on Saturday even i ng, M a rch 1st , at t he SF Eagle. E nter t a i n ment i ncluded performances by a number of lcoal personalities.

Billed as an event that would sweep you up in all things Coven, Occult, Voodoo and Mag ik, the evening was a benef it raising much-needed funds for SF Night Ministry.

Photos by Rink

BAY T IM ES M ARC H 6, 2014

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Editor’s Note: Welcome to our Weddings, Anniversaries & Occasions section. Inquire how your social announcement can appear free of charge, or how your wedding services ad can be included at a special rate: Publisher@sfbaytimes.com or 415-601-2113.

DeWitt and Ronald Wong

WENDIJ.BLOGSPOT.COM

Congratulations to Officer Jill Cingolani of the Tiburon Police Department on her recent promotion to the rank of Sergeant.

Wedding Cake styled for St. Patrick’s Day

PHOTO BY RINK

PHOTOS BY NANCY RUBIN COURTESY OF BERKELEYSIDE

As reported in Berkeleyside, Kelly Ross and Alyssa Journey of Little Rock, AR, and DeWitt and Ronald Wong of San Leandro took part in the mass wedding on Valentine’s Day organized by the Downtown Berkeley Association.

The SF Pride Committee has announced that planning is officially underway for the 2014 Pride. Here’s a look back to a couple celebrating in the Dykes on Bikes contingent at the 2013 Parade. Their sign reads: “Here Comes The Pride.”

Fantabulousness at the Imperial Court’s 49th Coronation What does one wear to a coronation? I’ve never had to ask myself that question before. But, as I was asked to give a Jewish blessing/ prayer at the San Francisco Imperial Court’s 49th Coronation, I not only had to think about what I was going to wear, but what I would say.

I’ve spoken in front of many large groups before, but never one that I knew would be so fashion-conscious and fantabulously bedecked and bejeweled. I knew I would be wearing a suit and tie. More importantly, I had to figure out how I would accessorize! Though I’ve never done drag, I do have a small collection of brooches: some thanks to my grandmother and some thanks to eBay. When I think of a coronation, I think of crowning royalty. So I selected my crown brooch and added just a bit more bling.

What does a coronation have to do with a wedding column? Everything! The pomp. The circumstance. Special gowns, tuxes and uniforms. Creating a special space.

Taking time crafting a meaningful and memorable experience. Presenting a meaningful ritual grounded in tradition. Striving to make everyone feel welcome. Those are my goals at each and every wedding at which I officiate. And I believe those goals were beautifully met at the coronation.

My first step in learning about the upcoming coronation was to look at the Imperial Council’s website.

I was relieved to f ind a friend of mine, Jim Oerther, was a Lord of the Realm. Jim has a strong religious background, so I knew that he would be able to give me great advice on proper attire and the tenor of my comments.

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BAY TIMES M ARC H 6 , 2 0 1 4

course I’ll let you in, because you’re going to help me get into heaven!”

I was tickled that Donna Sachet, past Empress and the evening’s Mistress of Ceremonies, asked to meet me. She was thrilled that for the first time at Coronation, blessings from more than one faith tradition would be offered.

Weddings Howard Steiermann I then contacted the other clergy who would be offering the Christian blessing. Over the phone and emails I found Reverend Tommy Dillion II to be warm and welcoming.

As I drove to the Desig n Center building, I was surprised that I felt a bit anxious. What had I gotten myself into? Would the crowd care about my very brief blessings? Would they even hear me, or be so engaged in conversation that I would be like a Reno lounge singer who gets no attention?

I took a breath. As luck would have it, I ran into my friend Jim outside the front door. It was comforting that he knew so many people and introduced me around. I loved the parade of glamorous drag queens and men dressed to the nines crowded together in the entry foyer.

I didn’t know whether it would be an issue that I didn’t have a ticket, even though I was on the program.

The drag queen running the ticket desk said something to me like, “Of

The coronation began with the Color Guard marching on stage in all their glory. They were followed by the national anthems of Mexico, Canada and the United States. Reverends Lyle Beckman and Dianna Wheeler from the Night Ministry, Tommy Dillan II from St. Aidans, and I took to the stage. I offered two blessings. The f irst one acknowledged that God has given us life, sustained us, and has enabled us to reach such a joyous, fantabulous, shining moment in time. The second blessing had three parts: asking God to bless and guard our sacred space, asking that God’s light shine upon us and fill us, and finally, asking that we may always be authentic so peace can shine through us.

With my minute of blessing (and fame?!) over, the Reverends recited a prayer and sanctified the gathering with incense.

I would like to say a very special thank you to the outgoing Triple X Golden Star Emperor, Drew Cutler, who invited me to participate at this special evening.

With blessings of joy, peace and fantabulousness!

Howard M. Steiermann is an Ordained Ritual Facilitator based in San Francisco.

For more information, please visit www.

SFHoward.com.

Reflections on Arizona’s Vetoed Anti-Gay Legislation: Time to Seize the Moment portunities in the workplace, and limit their autonomy over medical decisions – all under the guise of religious freedom.

Arizona’s recently failed attempt to enact a law permitting restaurants, hotels, and other businesses to deny services to LGBT people, under the guise of religious liberty, rightly raised the ire of LGBT people and all those who oppose discrimination. The nationwide attention the bill received also has a silver lining.

It awakened Americans to the fact that LGBT people currently have no protections against discrimination in public accommodations under federal law, and that only 13 states prohibit such discrimination against LGBT people (and another 8 states outlaw such discrimination against lesbian and gay people).

In other words, even without the failed legislation, businesses in 29 states, including Arizona, currently can discriminate against LGBT people with legal impunity (if no local ordinance exists) because these states have no statutes prohibiting such discrimination, and federal law contains no such prohibition.

Ironically, our opponents’ efforts to enact this draconian legislation have educated Americans to the fact that LGBT people need these legal protections nationwide. It’s time for those who oppose discrimination in all its invidious forms to demand federal legislation to prohibit such discrimination against LGBT people.

The vetoed Arizona legislation also reminds us once again that we are all in this struggle together. Former Congressman Norman Mineta,

Marriage Equality John Lewis and Stuart Gaffney, Marriage Equality USA speaking to the Japanese American Citizens League about marriage discrimination against same-sex couples, said “a threat to anybody’s civil rights is a threat to the civil rights of all Americans.” Nowhere is this insight more evident than the Right Wing’s efforts, under the guise of religious protection, to undermine gains in equality that LGBT people, other minorities, and women have gained over the last six decades.

Later this month, the United States Supreme Court will hear arguments in cases where owners of public businesses claim that their religious views about contraception should take precedence over the medical choices that female employees and their doctors make about what is in the best interest of the women employees. A decision in favor of the owners could dramatically narrow women’s op-

Similarly, interpreting the First A mendment to allow business owners to use religion to justify discrimination could open a gaping hole in many other statutes that prohibit discrimination again minorities and women in employment and public accommodations. After all, the trial court judge in Loving v.

Virginia, the case in which the US Supreme Court ultimately overturned laws that banned interracial couples from marriage, ruled in favor such bans, proclaiming: “Almighty God created …(different) races …and placed them on separate continents…(this) fact…shows that he did not intend for the races to mix.” Religion could once again be used in innumerable contexts to justify discrimination.

The backlash against the Arizona bill is already causing other state legislatures to rethink passing similar measures. It’s time to seize the moment and enact federal legislation to protect LGBT people from discrimination in public accommodations nationwide.

John Lewis and Stuart Gaffney, together for nearly three decades, were plaintiffs in the California case for equal marriage rights decided by the California Supreme Court in 2008. They are leaders in the nationwide grassroots organization Marriage Equality USA.

Tips on Selecting Engagement Rings

PHOTO BY STEVEN UNDERHILL

(Editor’s Note: The “Bay Times” welcomes wedding and event coordinator Chanda Monique Eddens as a new columnist. In “Elements of Style,” Chanda will share helpful advice concerning all aspects of LGBT weddings. She has over 15 years of planning and design experience working with some of the most prestigious vendors and venues in the Bay Area.)

Mike Evans and Dan Deninger were married in December at the MCC-SF church

Same-sex weddings are still gaining momentum. This gives our community the chance to celebrate. Many may be new to the process and I’m here to help. With this column, we’ll walk through everything from proposing to planning a wedding. Let’s begin with engagement rings.

You can customize the ring, but if you’re traditional, you’ll want a diamond. Maybe you’re unsure and feel overwhelmed with information that doesn’t speak to you. I offer these tips: Do what’s best for your budget, relationship and future financial goals.

Research cost of rings to figure out a price range. Decide if you’ll shop in person or online. Both have drawbacks: Online, you won’t physically see the ring. In a shop, you might run into rude sales reps, but in person is ideal.

PHOTO COURTESY OF DEBORA SAVOY

When deciding on the ring, think of your partner. Consider his or her job and how jewelry is usually worn for style and comfort. Decide if your partner would like something that is more traditional or expressive.

Debora Savoy and Jean Myers visited Lafayette, LA, to join family and friends at the Mystic Krewe of Apollo’s Bal Masque XXXVIII.

Determine a material for the band.

Standards include gold, silver or platinum. Titanium and stainless steel are growing in popularity. Decide if you’ll use diamonds or any other

Elements of Style Chanda Monique Eddens gems. Also, consider if you both want matching rings.

When shopping for a diamond ring, look for a sparkle that catches your eye. Does the ring exhibit qualities that remind you of your relationship? Cut is about how a diamond was faceted to reflect light. Clarity refers to imperfections, like tiny scratches or air bubbles inside the diamond. These are also known as inclusions that, depending on their nature, can actually add to the diamond’s uniqueness. Caret refers to size.

You may think bigger is always better when buying a diamond, or any other gemstone. But act based on your budget, what your partner likes, and what somehow evokes characteristics of your relationship that you’d like to remember and treasure.

Chanda Monique Eddens is the executive designer and owner of A Monique Affair.

Chanda aims to provide a beautiful and memorable experience, delivering an event that will enchant both you and your guests. http://www.amoniqueaffair.com/ BAY T IM ES M ARC H 6, 2014

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Heed Rumi’s Timeless Teachings LEO (July 23 – August 22) Have you cleaned your closet lately, Leo? Currently, all sorts of subconscious skeletons collect dust in there. Planetary patterns help you purge unwanted waste now. Big beginnings lie ahead.

SAGITTARIUS (November 22 – December 21) Everyone knows you’re the zodiac’s most skillful archer. But what good is aiming your arrow if you never release it, Sagittarius? Cultivate your creative outlets now. Don’t wait to exhale.

TAURUS (April 20 – May 20) Unite with your tribe, Taurus. Recent reconstruction within your belief system could have you reeling with uncertainty and confusion. Compassionate supporters surround you at every corner. Connect with your community.

VIRGO (August 23 – September 22) Let’s face it, Virgo. For a picky perfectionist like yourself, the prospect of unpredictability can be highly unpleasant. Scrap the statistics now. You’ll score more by surrendering to life’s surprises.

CAPRICORN (December 22 – January 19) The climate is considerably different now, Capricorn.

Stellar signals strongly suggest that you synchronize your outer surroundings with your inner essence. It’s time to revamp your root system.

GEMINI (May 21 – June 20) The journey is ever evolving, Gemini. Aspirations and associations are changing abruptly. As you refine your goals accordingly, remember that “getting there” isn’t nearly as valuable as the adventure.

LIBRA (September 23 – October 22) Both home and career benefit from the celestial stimulation sparkling in your relationship sector now.

Pick partners who vibe with your virtues, Libra.

You’ve got a lot of love on the line.

AQUARIUS (January 20 – February 18) As the zodiac’s fearless freedom fighter, you rebel against regulation. While that’s admirable, Aquarius, there are certain structures that serve to strengthen your cause. Determine where you can work the system.

ARIES (March 21 – April 19) Accentuate your eccentricities, Aries. Astral energies urge you to demonstrate what makes you different now. You’ll open the door to unforeseen opportunities if you feel free to flaunt your uniqueness. better.

Astrology Gypsy Love Mawlana Jalal ad-Din Rumi was a 13th-century Persian poet and Sufi mystic. His profound celebration of a divine and all-inclusive love has transcended national and ethnic borders. Over 800 years after his death, recordings of Rumi’s works have even topped America’s Top 20 Billboard chart.

Astrologically, we’re beckoned to bust boundaries of our own now. Rumi reminds us, “The garden of the world has no limits, except in your mind.”

CANCER (June 21 – July 22) Be open to expanding your experiences, Cancer.

Cosmically, you’re well advised to take a walk outside the confines of your comfort zone. Don’t put a lid upon your limitless potential.

Visit www.GypsyLoveProductions.com

SCORPIO (October 23 – November 21) Soothe your state of mind, Scorpio. The restless energy that’s rattling you can also set you free.

Satisfy longstanding curiosities by waxing philosophical. Arouse your right brain.

PISCES (February 19 – March 20) Your perspective is shifting, Pisces. In fact, you’re peeping through an entirely new lens now. Record radical revelations as they rise to the surface. This alternate reality is worth remembering.

Gypsy Love Productions is dedicated to inspiring love and unity with music, dance, and astrology.

As Heard on the Street . . .

compiled by Rink

AL L PHOTOS BY RIN K

Do you think that the new high tech companies coming into San Francisco will help or hurt The City in the long run?

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Strange de Jim

Dana Hopkins

Jerry Wilder

Ben Leong

Adam Sandel

“I think that it will hone our cutting edge.”

“Calling that Google Glass bar scuffle a hate crime, which is in national headlines, trivializes the pain of hate crime survivors, including me. Come on!”

“Of course it will help. Things have to move forward.”

“I do not believe that the influx of high tech companies will hurt The City, because they will improve the economy and keep San Francisco on the leading edge.”

“Prosperity is better than no prosperity. The City is evolving and people need to evolve with it, and people with money should be encouraged to live here.”

BAY TIMES M ARC H 6 , 2 0 1 4

Arts&Entertainment ODC’s LGBTQ Night to Feature Mesmerizing Dancer Corey Brady

Corey Brady’s performances are so focused, passionate and memorable that audiences are transported into what feels like a magical spell woven by a true dance master. With the Oberlin Dance Collective (ODC) for over a decade now, Brady is a crowd favorite. Check out his “Sixty Second Self-Portrait” online, odcdance.org/ videogallery.php?param=159&p=1, and you’ll get a taste of how he beautifully plays with gender in performances, representing the full range from muscular power to sensitive, graceful artist. We were thrilled to get a chance to learn more about Corey and ODC’s upcoming LGBTQ Night.

Bay Times: Please tell us about your career and how you first became interested in dance.

Corey Brady: I started dancing while in a middle school program for the performing arts. I was studying music and taking private piano lessons. During my 8th grade year, I was encouraged by one of my friends to take a few ballet classes at her local studio. I enjoyed it, but did not think I was talented enough to pursue it. Later that year, I auditioned for Houston’s High School for the Performing and Visual Arts in both instrumental music and dance. I was accepted to the Dance Department, and dancing took over from that point forward. I later attended the University of Oklahoma, earning a BFA in Dance. My time at OU allowed me to study under many great teachers and guest artists while

learning about all aspects of professional theater. I also had the opportunity to go on three separate international tours to Paraguay and Mexico.

I auditioned for ODC after my last semester of school and got the job, which brought me to San Francisco in 2003. Since moving to the Bay Area, I have also had the chance to work with RAWdance and Amy Seiwert’s Imagery Contemporary Ballet.

BT: What role does dance play in your life? Its importance seems to transcend what’s in any given performance, both for dancers as talented as you are, and for audience goers.

CB: Dancers, professional or not, connect with the physical and emotional implications of movement. We have a deep relationship with these elements.

For many, it can be easier to express ideas or feelings through movement rather than words. Audiences have the chance to be transported from their everyday life. Witnessing dance gives them the opportunity to find their own meaning in what they see, and maybe even be inspired to view art in a new way.

BT: W hat ca n you sha re w it h us about the purpose of ODC’s upcoming LGBTQ Night? When did this event begin, and how has the response been from the community?

PHOTOS C OURT ESY OF OD C

Dance

CB: This event is designed to engage the LGBTQ community with our work. This is the second year. It has been a great way to introduce new audiences to dance. I hope that the future will bring a heightened kinship between the LGBTQ and local dance communities.

BT: What is the program for the upcoming LGBTQ Night? In addition to the performance itself, what else will be featured at the event?

CB: The LGBTQ Night will be program A, which is boulders and bones, a new work by ODC choreographers Brenda Way and KT Nelson, inspired

by Andy Goldsworthy, and with live music by cellist Zoe Keating. This is our world premiere for 2014. In addition to the performance, there will be a pre-party at the YBCA terrace with cocktails, conversation, and small bites.

BT: What message would you like to send to Bay Times readers?

CB: This is an exciting time for dance in the Bay Area, despite the challenges local artists are facing these days.

I encourage all to get out there and take part in the many opportunities to engage in art, no matter what form it takes.

LGBTQ Night at ODC/Dance Downtown, Friday, March 28 at 7 pm, Yerba Buena Center for the Arts, San Francisco.

For tickets and additional information about this and other ODC performances, please go to: odcdance.org/index.php

Two New International Films Worth Seeing: The Rocket and Bethlehem As the film opens, Mali (Alice Keohavong) gives birth to Ahlo and his twin.

However, this curses Ahlo.

Film

Gary M. Kramer Two impressive international films— one light, one dark—open this weekend in Bay Area theaters.

The Rocket, written and directed by Kim Mordaunt, is an enjoyable, albeit predictable, crowd-pleaser set in the northern mountains of Laos. This award-winning film is as charming as its resourceful young hero, Ahlo (Sitthiphon Disamoe).

His bad luck may be what prompts a tragic accident as his family relocates to make way for a hydroelectric dam in their village. Moreover, Ahlo also causes a disruption in the new village.

As such, he becomes an outcast along with his family members. They set out for a new place to live along with Kia (Loungna Kaosainam) and her uncle Purple (Thep Phongam), a man who channels James Brown. Soon, Ahlo hopes to build a rocket to win a local competition’s large cash prize and restore luck to his hardscrabble family.

If there are no surprises as to what transpires, The Rocket features some glorious moments (and scenery), including an underwater swimming sequence, a mythical funeral ceremony, and the rocket competition itself. Mordaunt has crafted an atmospheric film that addresses issues of tradition vs. modernization. He coaxes affable performances out of his entire non-professional cast, and celebrates Ahlo’s determina-

tion to prove himself and find his selfworth. The Rocket is a real sleeper.

Meeting me at the AFI Fest in Los Angeles last November, the Australian Mordaunt described making his film— which involved children, animals, and explosives—as “playful chaos.” The f ilmmaker enjoyed the magic and spontaneity of working with children, whom, he observed, could be as unpredictable as the animals. Mordaunt has a background in documentaries; in 2007, he made a film called Bomb Harvest, also shot in Laos. While in Southeast Asia, he learned about the history of the people and their festivals.

He said he wanted to use the rocket festival depicted in his film as a “metaphor to turn war into something more beautiful.”

The Israeli-Palestinian conflict is the subject of Bethlehem, an urgent and gripping drama about Sanfur (Shadi Mar’i), an Arab teenager who is working as an undercover asset for Razi (Tsahi Halevi), an Israeli Secret Service officer.

Director Yuval Adler, who also chatted with me for the Bay Times at last year’s AFI Festival, explained that he wanted to jump between his characters to show the same event from both sides and perspectives. His non-biased approach works well as viewers come to understand the complex relationship between Sanfur and Razi, which is tested when Razi’s brother, Ibrahim (Hisham Suliman), and his martyr group take responsibility for a suicide bombing in Jerusalem.

Razi, who goes to great lengths to protect his asset, learns that Sanfur assisted his brother, and this revelation could put his operation in jeopardy.

Meanwhile, Sanfur feels a sense of duty to help avenge his brother’s untimely death at the hands of the Israelis.

There are multiple subplots and double crosses that occur in Bethlehem, and the dramatic tension builds when Sanfur and Razi are at odds with one another.

But, Adler keeps the characters and their motivations clear, and he moves (continued on page 22) BAY T IM ES M ARC H 6, 2014

17

Round About — Imperial Court Coronation 49

P HOTO BY RIN K

P HOTO BY RIN K

Emperor Drew Cutler and Empress Patty McGroin welcomed attendees to the SF Galleria Design Center for the 2014 Coronation on Saturday, February 22. Former Emperor & Empress Sissy St. Clair and Bradley Roberts crowned new Empress Misty Blue and Emperor JP Soto. A grand evening of pageantry and entertainment was enjoyed by a sold out audience which included Bay Times photographers Rink and Steven Underhill.

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BAY TIMES M ARC H 6 , 2 0 1 4

P HOTO BY R I NK PH OTO B Y STEVEN UNDER HIL L

PH OTO B Y STEVEN UNDER HIL L P H OTO B Y ST E VEN UN DER H I LL

Twitter, and find us Facebook.

and follow us on on

P H OTO B Y ST E VEN UN DER H I LL

Stories @sfbaytimes.com

PH OTO B Y ST EVE N U NDE RH I L L

See more

PHOTO BY STEV EN UN DER HIL L

Tribute to Imperial Court founder Empress I Jose Sarria

PHOTO BY S TEVE N UNDERHI LL

P HOTO BY RI N K

PHOTO BY RIN K

Empress Patty McGroin (above) and Emperor Drew Cutler (below) expressed thanks to all for support during their year of reign.

Producer and Performer Tweaka Turner, aka Michael Cerchiai, Takes Music to the Stratosphere Michael was born in New York and has always had a knack for music.

His first musical experience goes way back to the fifth grade, when he wrote his first song: “I’d Like to Teach the World to Read.” I asked Michael why he loves music so much and he said, “Music moves me more than most things in the world. The feelings starts deep within my soul and I am thankful.”

Gems of The Bay Kippy Marks

In the sixth grade, Michael started DJ-ing at his school’s gymnasium using portable 45 players while his classmates danced. Michael said, “I remember playing that disco classic ‘I Will Survive’ by Gloria Gaynor and being threatened by the stoners, but nothing could stop me. I was hooked and have DJ’d ever since. This taught my ear how a good pop song is put together.”

There are many aspects to the music industry. And within this industry there are singers, musicians, dancers, choreographers, promoters, make-up artists, costumers, advertisers, engineers, producers…the list goes on.

Someone who is skilled in many of these areas is San Francisco’s own multi-talented “Space Tranny” and producer Tweaka Turner, aka Michael Cerchiai.

Michael moved to San Francisco in 2008 after making frequent visits here since 1997. Michael always knew San Francisco would be his home. He has never been happier before living here. He told me how he loves and appreciates all of the area’s unique and talented individuals, as well as the inspiring vistas and opportunities for musical growth.

I first met Tweaka at the old Deco Lounge at a fundraiser where she was painted all in silver. She was serving us some unique DJ magic. I was blown away, and knew that I was gonna have me some fun! Tweaka was playing fantastic disco beats with a space tranny” twist. Her showmanship was in a class of its own.

Since arriving in San Francisco, Michael has been diligently working in the music industry. He has written many songs and music leaning toward the house/progressive genre, and has worked with recording artists like Gypsy Love (who is also an astrologer for the Bay Times), Raquela, (continued on page 22)

P HOTO BY PAUL BREWER

Michael Cerchiai

Michael was also a talented gymnast, and won a first place medal in the f loor exercise by performing to the disco tune “Knock on Wood” by Amii Stewart. Michael then went on to State University of New York-Purchase College, where he received top honors in song writing and where he studied drawing and oil painting.

Sister Dana Sez: Words of Wisdumb From a Fun Nun to discover what the evil villain Dixie is up to, including running a low-price escort service, corporate takeovers, and manufacturing of crystal meth taken via booty bumps. As can be expected by the title, there are plenty of poop jokes, as well as cleverly choreographed sex and violence with bizarre sound effects.

There is lots of mugging (with the face) by the actors. This “white exploitation” send-up is full of laughs and chances to cheer the heroes and boo the bad guys. Will revenge be had?

Will justice be served? Find out every Friday and Saturday night at 8pm. For tix: rebel.com and eventbrite.com/o/catfights-and-shoulderpads-productions.

Sister Dana sez, “May I be the first to wish everybuddy both a very happy, lucky St. Patrick’s Day, and also the Ides of March - if you celebrate that! If so, either wear green or a toga, and if both - a green toga!”

I know I celebrate the fact that newly elected NYC Mayor DeBlasio refuses to march in his city’s St. Patrick’s Day Parade because they won’t allow gays to openly participate.

Right on!

S**T & CHAMPAGNE has thankfully been held over at Rebel until the end of March.

This campy, corny, kooky comedy dance musical stars D’Arcy Drollinger (Sex and the City Live!, Project: Lohan) as Champagne White, Matthew Martin(The Golden Girls, Baby Jane?) as Dixie Stampede, Steven LeMay (Friends Live!, Roseanne) as Brandy, Champagne’s best friend/roommate/adopted half-sister and calf model, Nancy French (Friends Live!, Pearls Over Shanghai) as Debbie the dancer and placard holder (to indicate scene changes), Alex Brown as Detective Jack Hammer and Tony the thug, and Peter Griggs as Sergio and Johnny the Gun. Directed by D’Arcy Drollinger & Laurie Bushman. Before the show begins, the audience is entertained by several pole dancers: two hot go-go boys, a drag queen, and a drag king - not to mention a comical, gum-chewing, extremely bored lap dancer full of ennui during her dirty duties. Rebel nightclub, 1760 Market Street, has been turned into the Sha-Boom Room. Onstage comes stripper extraordinaire Champagne, who witnesses her fiancé shot to death by gangsters. The plot thickens as Champagne gets more and more involved, and more and more people are murdered. Champagne has to go undercover

AND MY ROOM STILL ROCKS LIKE A SHIP ON THE SEA (CA RUSO’S DREAM) was part of a dramatic unveiling of many upright and grand piano sculptures

by Brian Goggin with Dorka Keehn, featuring conductor Mauro Ffortissimo and opera singers Zoltan DiBartolo, Michelle Jasso, and Mark Nassar, aerial choreographer Karl Gillick with artwork lighting designer Gabriel Rey-Goodlatte in the musical world premiere of “Sogno ad Occchi Aperti di Caruso” by Veronika Krausas.

This all took place at 55-9th Street, where the lit sculptures are now a permanent art exhibition cascading from the front wall. Aerialists Alayna Stroud, Ariellah Winther, Esther Wrebel, and Shannon Collier slowly, gracefully descended from the 17-story high-rise to unveil the brilliant art, ripping away the white sailcloth while over a dozen pianists played below. Later, the Extra Action Marching Band added pizzazz with their horns, drums, and flags. Go see this amazing artwork!

THE HOMO FILE SALON celebrated the life of queer iconoclast Sam Steward aka Phil Andros (his pen name). This fabulous affair featured food, champagne, performances by the Homo File cast, special guests and speakers, and enchanting live accordion music of Ben Creed. This was held in the magnificent home of Mark Garrett and Eric Smith with their Queer Art collection like no other. All proceeds supported the premiere of HOMO FILE in the National Queer Arts Festival in June at CounterPULSE. The Homo File Salon gave us a sneak-peek of the upcoming show by Seth Eisen and

(continued on page 22) BAY T IM ES M ARC H 6, 2014

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compiled by Robert Fuggiti

See many more Calendar items @ www.sfbaytimes.com

Beach Blanket Babylon – Club Fugazi. $25-$130. 8 pm. (678 Green St.) www.beachblanketbabylon.com.

Enjoy Steve Silver’s famous musical revue packed with hilarious pop culture and political antics.

Tubesteak Connection – Aunt Charlie’s. $4. 10 pm. (133 Turk St.) www.auntcharlieslounge.com.

Dance the night away to great music and a fun crowd at one of the best gay dive bars in town.

Throwback Thursdays – Q Bar. Free. 9 pm to 2 am. (456 Castro St.) www.qbarsf.com.

Playing dance and house music from the ‘80s and ‘90s with 2 for 1 drinks all night.

On the Edge – Dance Theatre. $25. 7 pm. (Paseo De San Carlos and S 4th St., San Jose State University). www.sjdanceco.org. An evening of wonderful artistry and performance from SJ Dance.

Boy Bar – The Café. $5. 9 pm to 2 am. (2369 Market St.) www.guspresents.com. The Castro’s hottest weekly party with go-go dancers and early drink specials.

In Love and Struggle – La Pena Cultural Center. $15. 7 pm to 10 pm. (3105 Shattuck Ave.) www. berkeleycopwatch.org. Enjoy a celebration of International Women’s

Back by popular demand, the San Francisco Ballet presents “Cinderella,” March 11-23.

Day, women’s power and resistance.

Singles Social Group – Toll House Hotel. Free. 6 pm to 9 pm.

(140 South Santa Cruz Ave., Los Gatos) www.tollhousehotel.com.

Meet like-minded baby-boomer, professional lesbians looking to expand their circle of friends.

MCCLA’s International Women’s Day Celebration – Mission Cultural Center. $8. 9 pm. 8 pm. (2868 Mission St.) www.missionculturalcenter.org. A night of

celebration and honoring of women around the world.

Day with a concert by the Community Women’s Orchestra.

Midway to Michfest Fundraiser – El Rio. $20. 3 pm to 8 pm. (3158 Mission St.) www. michfest.com. This annual event to help raise money for the Michigan Womyn’s Music Festival.

Salsa Sundays – El Rio. $10. 3 pm to 8 pm. (3158 Mission St.) www.elriosf.com. Enjoy live music and dancing every second and fourth Sunday.

Alfredo’s Fire – Seventh Avenue Presbyterian Church. $5-$10 donation. 7 pm to 8 pm. (1329 Seventh Ave.) www.dignitysanfrancisco.org.

Dignity San Francisco, an affirming group for LGBT Catholics and allies, hosts the filmmakers of Open Eye Pictures as they screen their award­winning documentary.

International Women’s Day Concert – Lake Merritt United Methodist Church. $15. 5 pm. (1330 Lakeshore Ave., Oakland) www. communitywomensorchestra.org.

Celebrate international Women’s

PHOTO BY ER IK TOMASSON

Wishful Sinking – Victoria Theatre. $45. 8 pm. (2961 16th St.) www.victoriatheatre.com. A titanic adventure with The Mask and Wig Club that will have you laughing all through the night.

Women’s March MEGA Make Contact – Hotel Nikko.

Free for Members/$20 Nonmembers. 6 pm to 8 pm. (222 Mason St.) www.ggba.com. Make contact and connect with LGBT & Allied business professionals at this month’s Make Contact event.

Gay Bowling – Mission Bowling Club. $15. 5 pm to 8 pm. (3176 17th St.) www.missionbowlingclub. com. Mix, mingle and meet new friends at this weekly social.

Cinderella – SF War Memorial Opera House. $22+. 8 pm. (301 S. Van Ness) www.sfballet.org.

Following an enormously successful run in 2013, Christopher Wheeldon’s magical production of Cinderella is back.

Piano Bar 101 – Martuni’s. Free.

9 pm. (4 Valencia St.) www.dragatmartunis.com. Sing along to your favorite songs.

Trivia Night – Hi Tops. Free. 10 pm. (2247 Market St.) www. hitopssf.com. Test your trivia knowledge at this popular sports bar.

Karaoke Mondays – Lookout.

Free. 8 pm to 1 am. (2600 16th St.) www.lookoutsf.com. KJ Paul hosts a weekly karaoke night.

Castro Farmers’ Market Returns – Noe St. Free. 4 pm to 8 pm. (Noe St. between Market and Beaver St.) www.pcfma.com. The very popular Castro Farmers’ Market will be back in action with Northern California’s freshest fruits and vegetables, live music, and fun activities.

Dream Queens Revue – Aunt Charlie’s Lounge. Free. 9:30 pm to 11:30 pm. (133 Turk St.) www. dreamqueensrevue.com. A fabulous drag show featuring Collette LeGrande, Ruby Slippers, Sophilya Leggz and more.

Wednesday Matinee – Openhouse. Free. 2 pm. (225 30th St.) www.openhouse-sf.org. Enjoy an evening of LGBT-themed films every 2nd Wednesday.

Lasso of Truth – Marin Theatre Company. $37-$58. 8 pm. (397 Miller Ave., Mill Valley) www.marin20

BAY TIMES M ARC H 6 , 2 0 1 4

theatre.org. Marin Theater Company presents the world premier of Carson Kreitzer’s Lasso of Truth. Through March 16.

Gym Class – Hi Tops. Free. 10 pm. (2247 Market St.) www. hitopssf.com. Enjoy a night of fun at Castro’s only gay sports bar.

Men at Twerk – Beaux. Free. 9 pm. (2344 Market St.) www. beauxsf.com. Hiphop meets house music at this weekly party.

Big Dyke Comedy Show – The Legionnaire Saloon. $10. 8 pm.

(2272 Telegraph Ave., Oakland) www.facebook.com/hellagaycomedyshow. Hella Gay Comedy presents the Big Dyke Comedy Show.

Cubcake – Lonestar. Free. 9 pm.

(1354 Harrison St.) www.lonestarsf.com. A monthly bear dance party happening second Fridays.

Some Thing – The Stud. $5. 10 pm. (399 9th St.) www.studsf.com.

A uniquely themed party every Friday, with drag at 11 pm.

Putting on the Ritz – Casto Theatre. $20. 8 pm. (429 Castro St.) www.castrotheatre.com. Emmy, Tony, Grammy, Oscar and Lifetime Achievement SAG Award Winner Rita Moreno takes center stage.

Judy Collins – Venetian Room. $65+. 8 pm. (950 Mason St.) www. bayareacabaret.org. Bay Area Cabaret will present Grammy Award winning singer/songwriter Judy Collins.

St. Patrick’s Day Parade – SF Civic Center. Free. 11:30 am. (Civic Center, San Francisco) The largest Irish event on the West Coast.

The Threepenny Opera – The Stage. $17.50-$35. 2 pm. (490 S. 1st St.) www.thestage.org. A powerful and evocative musical written by Bertolt Brecht. Through March 30.

First Aid and CPR Class in Spanish – GGBA. Free. 9 am to 2 pm. (598 Vermont St.) www.ggba. com. A first aid and CPR training class in Spanish.

for Bay Area LGBT sports groups.

How To Dress Well – The Independent. $16. 9 pm. (628 Divisadero) www.theindependentsf. com. Songwriter and producer Tom Krell, who goes by How to Dress Well, delivers a performance that’s not to be missed.

Chicks with Shticks Exhibit – San Francisco Main Library. Free. 10 am to 6 pm. (100 Larkin St.) www. sfpl.org. A collection of Kinsey Sicks artifacts including scripts, sheet music and photos will be on display.

Georgia O’Keeffe and Lake George – de Young Museum. $25.

9:30 am to 5:15 pm. (50 Hagiwara Tea Garden Dr.) www.deyoungmuseum.org. Presenting Modern Nature: Georgia O’Keeffe and Lake

George, organized by The Hyde Collection with the Georgia O’Keeffe Museum. Through May 11.

The Tommy Igoe Big Band – Yoshi’s San Francisco. $22. 8 pm.

(1330 Fillmore St.) www.yoshis. com. Drumming icon, Tommy Igoe and his band put a fresh spin on a proud American art form.

LGBT Alumni Mixer – Hi Tops.

Free. 6 pm to 8 pm. (2247 Market St.) www.hitopssf.com. Bay Area LGBT Ivy Alumni and Friends presents an LGBT Alumni mixer, cohosted by Cornell U GALA, Brown GALA, Dartmouth GALA & FFR/ Princeton BTGALA.

Theatre. $25-$50. 7 pm to 9 pm.

(275 Hayes St.) www.ciis.edu/publicprograms. Laverne Cox explores how race, class, and gender affect the lives of trans women of color.

Smack Dab Open Mic Night – Magnet. Free. 8 pm. (4122 18th St.) www.magnetsf.org. An open mic night with host Larry-bob Roberts.

Ain’t I a Woman – Nourse

Business Exchange Network – Castro Community Room. Free for GGBA members. 11 am to 12 pm. (501 Castro St.) www.ggba. com. GGBA’s Business Exchange Network (BEN) is a group designed to help members grow their referral-based business, Easy – The Edge SF. Free. 7 pm to 2 am. (4149 18th St.) www.edgesf. com. Enjoy $2 well drink specials.

Jock – Lookout. $2. 3 pm to 9 pm.

(3600 16th St.) www.lookoutsf. com. A weekly fundraising party

BAY T IM ES M ARC H 6, 2014

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(ROSTOW continued from page 9) Majority Rule!

Finally, let’s talk about polls. You know, of course, that approval of same-sex marriage has steadily increased over the last ten years or so. But did you realize that our poll numbers have surged in the last two years? Did you realize that the most recent survey shows almost 60 percent of Americans now support marriage equality?

I guess I hadn’t realized that we gained maybe ten or fifteen points in a relatively short time. But the interesting thing is that conservatives still don’t seem to know that they are now in the minority. According to study by the Public Religion Research Institute, roughly 80 percent of marriage opponents believe that most Americans oppose marriage right along with them.

No wonder they’re so surprised by the legal and political developments in the world around them.

Granted, things have changed quickly. Indeed, only 57 percent of strong gay marriage supporters know their views are widely shared, and only 34 percent of all Americans correctly state that a majority favors marriage equality. But I don’t think it will be a secret much longer. That is, unless you’re the sort of person who watches nothing but Fox News and reads nothing but George Will and Rich Lowry. arostow@aol.com

(SISTER DANA continued from page 19) an installation of ephemera and rare visual treats. One snippet from Homo File had Gertrude Stein outing Steward and welcoming him to “The Family.” Another snippet had Alice B. Toklas typing a letter to Steward regarding his “Stud File” of over 600 homosexual conquests - featuring tattoo illustrations made with light-writing on a trick’s bare chest as projector screen. Go see this fascinating play in its entirety!

Eisen is a performing and visual artist who uses a hybrid of contemporary performance: Butoh, puppetry, theater, circus, drag, and performance art. Special guests were Joey Cain - queer historian on the legacy of the Great Gay Succession from Walt Whitman to Edward Carpenter to Allen Ginsberg; Michael Williams - executor of Sam Steward’s estate, speaking about their friendship in the latter days; and Will Grant - LGBTQ educator and historian on Queer History as activism. Tax-deductible donations and information can be found at homofile. eyezen.org.

Congratulations and best wishes to Their Most Imperial Majesties JP Soto and Misty Blue at the IMPERIAL CORONATION. We look forward to working with them and the 49th Reign of the Founding Mother Court of the International Court System - San Francisco. Heartfelt thanks to the other candidates Ray Tilton and Danielle Logan on a great campaign. Their professionalism and willingness to serve speaks volumes to their character.

We know we will continue to see great things from them. Cheers and props to Emperor Drew Cutler and Empress Patty McGroin, who stepped down with grace and style, and their Wild Kingdom Court on an amazing year of fun and fundraising. Due to their dedication and hard work, along with the generous community that supports the good deeds of the Imperial Court founded

by Jose Sarria in 1965, nearly $60,000 was raised and distributed to local charities here in the Bay Area! Kudos!

The people in charge of EssEff›s nightlife industry gathered at the Castro Theatre for the 2ND ANNUAL NITEY AWARDS, celebrating clubs and people who entertain us, a slightly gayer version of the Oscars, with LGBTQ and str8 attendees. It was overseen

by Entertainment Commissioners Jocelyn Kane, Audrey Joseph, and event producer Negar Siadatnejad, distributing awards in 23 categories judged by industry professionals during visits to the nominated places: Best Hotel Bar: Chambers at the Phoenix Hotel; Best Happy Hour: Mars Bar and Restaurant; Best Venue for Sound: Audio Discotech; Best Gay Dance Club: Club OMG; Best Irish Bar: O’Reilly’s; Best Neighborhood Bar: The Riptide; Best Sports Bar: Hi Tops; Best Late Night Food: Golden Boy Pizza; Best Beer: Mikkeller Bar; Best Cocktail Lounge: Trick Dog; Best Adult Entertainment: Hustler Club; Best Wine Bar: Bluxome Street Winery; Best New Venue: tie between Wild Hare and Beaux; Best Club Promoters: Sunset Promotions; Best Drag Queen: Donna Sachet; Best Mixologist: Kate Bolton of Maven; Best Gay Bar: The Lookout; Best Variety of Offerings: Madrone Art Bar; Excellence in Philanthropy, Individual: Gary Virginia; Excellence in Philanthropy, Business: The Lookout; Best Small Dance Club: Monarch; Best Large Dance Club: Mighty; Best Small Live Venue: Bottom of the Hill; Best Large Live Venue: The Regency Ballroom; Iconic

(FILM continued from page 19) the action along nimbly. A sequence in which Ibrahim is chased and killed is particularly intense, and there are some shocking acts of violence.

Viewers will be absorbed in the drama and care about the lead characters who operate in secret. As Sanfur faces pressures from his family or when Razi gets static from his boss, who perceives Razi made a procedural error, audiences un-

Person Award: Joel Selvin, SF Chronicle. I didn’t agree with over half the winners, but then again, I didn’t get to vote. I will add my categories of Best Voddie Served: Stoli; and Best Caviar Served: Tsar Nicoulai.

BAY AREA LAWYERS FOR INDIVIDUAL FREEDOM (BALIF) is the nation’s oldest and largest bar association of LGBTQ persons in the field of law. Founded in 1980, BALIF represents its members’ interests in the wider San Francisco Bay Area. BALIF members and supporters include San Francisco Bay Area judges, lawyers, law students, and legal workers. BALIF held its 34TH ANNUAL GALA, “Standing Proud,” at the Bently Reserve. They honored Judge Vaughn Walker with the Legal Service Award for his years of service on the bench and for penning the initial decision in the Prop 8 case, which prevailed before the Supreme Court and lifted the same-sex marriage ban in California - paving the way for such similar repeals nationwide. BALIF also presented LYRIC (Lavender Youth Recreation & Information Center) with the Community Service Award in celebrating their 25th anniversary as a beacon of light and hope by providing a safe and supportive environment for Bay Area LGBTQ youth to explore their identities and live authentic lives.

K REWE DE K INQUE, a Mardi Gras themed charitable organization, celebrated Fat Tuesday at the Eagle bar with our masked ball, M A R DI GR AS M AGICK, benefiting San Francisco Night Ministry, serving needy people on the streets after hours.

K ing X K ippy Marks and Queen X Kitty Tapata stepped down and made way for King XI Joseph Nunez and Queen XI Li’l Kim Chee aka Don Ho to reign.

Fabulous entertainment was provided by Empress 43 Cher-A-Little, Ethel Merman, Ana Mae Coxxx Grand Duke 39 Moses Garcia, comedian Valerie Branch aka Pia Messing (you know: PMS), recording artist Xavier Toscano, and Marcy Playground, as well as Kippy and Kitty.

Emperor 36 and Empress 36 Chablis emceed and Patrik Gallineaux was Grand Marshal. We truly “Let the Good Times Roll,” as they say in New Orleans.

Rest in peace, my dear dear departed SISTER BA RBI MITZVA H of THE SISTERS OF PERPETUAL INDUL GENCE. Sister Barbi’s presence - much like her schnoz - was larger than life and made an impression on everyone around her. Sister Barbi was one of the founders of the Russian River SPI House, and devoted herself to her House and her community. She then moved to San Francisco where she was welcomed with open arms. She used her considerable business experience as the House’s board chair, working on a number of projects that helped SPI, Inc. evolve into a more mature corporation. Her revolutionary work on Pink Saturday resulted in the most profitable event in the Sisters’ history while ensuring a safe and fun event for all. Sister Barbi was also an invaluable help with Folsom Street Events, tirelessly working the Up Your Alley and Folsom Street Fairs for 19 years.

Sister Barbi spent many long hours working with the City and the Alexander Hamilton Post 448 to resurrect the Sisters’ Bingo in the Green Room at the War Memorial Building.

This event ran for several years, bringing fun back to fundraising and drawing sellout crowds. She also helped several Houses around the US start their own bingo games.

During her tenure with the SF House, Sister Barbi acted as mentor and guide to numerous potential members, sharing her wisdom and experience. She also worked with many of the newly-forming Houses, helping them with the critical first steps in becoming a House of the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence.

Sister Barbi eventually relocated to Portland where, in true Sister Barbi fashion, she had already started cultivating relationships in the community and was beginning to get involved with the Portland House. Sister Barbi leaves behind her loving, devoted husband, Sister Celeste L Powers as well as the Sisters from the Russian River, San Francisco, and Portland Houses, all of the many, many Sisters whose lives she touched, and the countless members of the community whom she worked, laughed, and played with over the years. I will miss her dearly.

ACADEMY OF FRIENDS presented RETURN TO THE EMER ALD CITY on Oscar Sunday at Terra Gallery. It was the 34th annual Academy Awards Night Gala for the 86th Academy Awards. Academy of Friends has distributed over $8.6 million from ticket sales to Bay Area HIV/AIDS services over the past 30+ years. Living gold painted Oscar statues greeted us at the door, and the classic Wizard of Oz quartet of Dorothy, Scarecrow, Tin Man, and Lion circulated the party.

Most everyone wore green, of course. Best Picture went to 12 Years a Slave, which I have yet to see. But the entire room let out a roaring cheer - as did I - when Best Actor in a Leading Role went to Matthew McConaughey and Best Actor in a Supporting Role was Jared Leto (both in Dallas Buyers Club, which reminded me of the first years of Project Inform, when AIDS activists had to go to Mexico for AZT, which wasn’t approved back in the Reagan era). Best Actress in a Leading Role was Cate Blanchett in Woody Allen’s Blue Jasmine, which I agreed with. And I was happy that Best Costume Design went to The Great Gatsby (Catherine Martin).

CUMMING UP!

derstand the deeper stories behind the surface issues.

a situation prompts Sanfur and Razi to confront each other, Bethlehem ends powerfully, but not happily.

Adler also conveys a strong sense of time and place, and creates a feel for the harsh conditions in Bethlehem and Jerusalem. Both Mar’i and Halevi are excellent and are particularly expressive, especially when they are hiding their real emotions. If the film gets a little contrived in the last act, when

Don’t miss PUTTING ON THE RITZ GALA at the Castro Theatre, Saturday, March 15, 8pm, by producer Marc Huestis, with the hysterical film, THE RITZ, starring Rita Moreno (who played Googie Gomez in the film) live in person, all about a wacky mix-up in a famous NYC bathhouse.

This 1976 Terrence McNally classic is a fundraiser for Let’s KickASS (AIDS Survivor Syndrome). Note: the very first time I saw this film, I wore nothing but a white towel in an actual bathhouse. Tix at ticketfly.com and (415) 863-0611.

PORNUCOPIA: this week’s f lick pick is CALIFORNIA DREAMIN’ from falconstudios.com.

Sister Dana sez, “The good news is the Obama administration indicated that Social Security is safe; the bad news is Medicare is still on the chopping block - because, you know, old people should just get sick and die.”

© 2014 Gary M. Kramer Gary M. Kramer is the author of “Independent Queer Cinema: Reviews and Interviews,” and the co-editor of “Directory of World Cinema: Argentina.” You can follow him on Twitter @ garymkramer.

(TWEAKA TURNER continued from page 19) Amoray, Sheena Rose and Motown legend Mary Wilson. Michael has had great success with many major record pool charts and continues to grow within the industry. Michael told me, “I’ve never been more passionate about creating fierce dance music and working with such amazing artists.”

Currently, Michael is working on a project with Raquela entitled “Summertime,” which is slated for release 22

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in a few months. Michael is also doing two re-mixes for the artist Amoray to be released later this summer.

Michael additionally is a radio personality who hosts the weekly “House of Pride Radio Show” with the fantastic Pearl Teese every Wednesday for LGBT live streaming radio. Michael said, “My goals are to have a Billboard charting dance song and to win a Grammy.” I think Michael will achieve them!

For more information, please visit s o u n d c l o u d . c o m /mj c - m i c h a e l cerchiai as well as w w w.facebook. c o m /t w e a k a .t u r n e r a n d w w w. facebook.com/HOP.R A DIO.SF Violinist Kippy Marks entertains audiences worldwide with his inspirational compositions and lively perfor mances that draw from classical , jazz, blues and dance. www.kippy marks.us

Round About – All Over Town – Photos by Rink

Volunteer Kelly Hart and AEF clint services manager Jeff Jones Susannah Dunlap, Julia Arramedes and Joanie Juster surround executive director Mike Smith at AIDS Emergency Fund/Breast Cancer Emergency Fund volunteer appreciation party at Eureka Valley Rec Center.

PHOTO BY CHAR LES SAN DERSON

Frank Martinez, Jose Reveles, Cal Callahan and James Poole volunteered at the AEF at the “Super Friends Beer Bust” benefit at Beaux Bar.

French filmmakers Pamela Varela and Emmanuel Trousse interviewed Bay Times photographer Rink at Castro Cove restaurant during his Impact of AIDS Castro Tour. Segments of the tour wil to be included in a documentary about stories of activism against AIDS in the US, Africa and France.

A memorial tribute to Sister Barbi Mitzvah and a thank you to Arizona Gov. Jan Brewer at 18th and Castro Street

Honoree Judge Vaughn Walker with Senator Reilly Meehan and Brian Christie served their Mark Leno at the BALIF 34th Anniversary “Standing Proud” Gala at Bentley Reserve gourmet Bespoke Doughnuts at Beaux Bar.

Richmond Ermet AIDS Foundation (REAF) producers Ken Henderson and Joe Seiler at the Celebration of LIFE honoring REAF co-founder Barbara Richmond at the SFLGBT Community Center.

Academy of Friends leaders Matthew Denckla and Howard Edelman at the VIP GalaPre-Party held at Mercedes of San Francisco.

A wine labeled in honor of REAF co-founder Barbara Richmond was presented by philanthropist Kimberly “Wine Lady” Hathaway.

Cheer SF members campaigned in the Castro for Empress candidate Misty Blue.

CAAMFEST (Asian American Film Festival) leaders Linda Blackaby, Masashi Niwano and Lin Kung at a press conference announcing the festival

Ben Leong and Masashi Niwano, festival director, promoting CAAMFEST

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