Love Lifted Me The 31-year-old Michigan native, Cassandra McNulty, stood before a small group of women gathered for camp meeting, her soothing voice echoing God’s call for an intimate relationship with his children. “Masks put a barrier between us and God,” she said before launching into reasons to share our stories, even when they are as difficult and painful as her own. “God wants us to use our testimony. Just like the woman at the well, he wants us to run back and tell everybody what Jesus has done for us. He wants us to be open and honest about our journeys and lives so they can ennoble and enrich our church and our young people.” Cassandra’s openness in sharing her own testimony comes from a desire to help other young women avoid a similar hurt and shame she experienced during high school and continued through her early college years. Her story further illustrates the struggles of Christian youth on public campuses and journeying through life, oftentimes without firm moorings, only to fall prey to wrong choices. Cassandra’s family moved a lot during her early years and she attended 12 different schools. The variety of schools in which she was enrolled was perhaps matched by the assortment of churches her family attended. “We went to [a variety of] churches; just things all over the place,” she recounts. “My dad very much believed that you go to the church where you feel like God is calling you and that is closest to scripture.” By her junior year of high school, Cassandra was immersed in an academic environment rife with partying, drug use and sex. As a Christian, she found herself feeling very much alone. An extrovert by nature, the isolation was nearly torture. “I sat alone at the lunch table for three months because I didn’t fit in,” she says. Finally, she could not take it anymore. “I started compromising in order to have friends.” Things started harmlessly enough. Cassandra began going to parties as the designated driver. “I won’t drink,” she justified. “I’ll be fine.” But that was Satan’s lie. One night, Cassandra was planning to attend a college party with some of her girlfriends. Since she was the designated driver, she stopped to pick up a can of soda before arriving at the crowded place. Things went on as usual – until one accidental slip changed everything. “I made the mistake of putting my drink down,” she says. “The next thing I know, I’m feeling really sick and dizzy.” Drawing a deep breath, she continues, “I woke up in a dark room, and I had been raped.” The experienced crushed her spirit. In the months and years afterwards, she remembers hearing voices telling her: You are dirty. God can never love you like this! You are alone. Cassandra finally decided that the only way she could cope was to fully participate in the activities around her. “I started down-spiraling very quickly, drinking a lot and having one relationship after the other, thinking that if I actually controlled the interactions that it would make me feel like I had control over what had happened to me,” she says. But it only made her feel worse.
Looking at herself in the mirror, Cassandra barely recognized the reflection she saw, but she recognized that she needed help. She made an appointment with her church’s youth group pastor, and bared her soul to him. But instead of receiving the support she was expecting, she found herself being blamed for everything. He asked her questions such as: “How do you know you were raped?” “Why were you even there at the party?” “He was basically telling me that, if it was true, it was all my fault anyway,” Cassandra remembers. “So, I left church, and I didn’t look back.” Cassandra then moved out of her parents’ home and began attending a local community college. Deeply depressed, the former top student was struggling to make Cs. “I knew I needed help, but I didn’t know what to do.” Although she did not recognize it at the time, God had not given her up. At the community college, Cassandra began running into old friends from her youth group. They always treated her kindly, encouraging her to come to a college Bible study group with them. Despite the fact Cassandra continued to dismiss the invitations, they never stopped asking. Then, on a whim to placate them, Cassandra gave into their efforts and decided to check out the college’s Bible study group. For a while, she explains that she had one foot in Bible studies and one foot in the world… until she heard a sermon that changed her life. Through the message of the sermon and the gentle, persistent love of her friends, Cassandra realized, “God still loved me, that I was not too far gone to him to save, and that he just desired for me to come to him.” Falling to her knees, weeping, Cassandra begged God to rescue her. She asked God, “to cover my sins and make me whole again, to heal me, to take the anguish and the pain away.” “The crazy thing is,” she paused with a smile, “He did.” Cassandra stopped drinking and partying, but she did not end there. “I gave my life so completely to him that I told him that I would give him my summers to do mission work.”
New College, New Commitment When Cassandra entered the University of Michigan, she had a friend and roommate who was a Messianic Jew. Shocked by the secular environment, the girls knew they needed to be intentional in seeking out a church community. One day, they strolled past two students who were Adventist public campus missionaries. Cassandra and her roommate heard them mentioning things like Bible studies, church service and vegetarian meals. “My roommate and I just looked at each other and we were like… This has to be from God.” Because her Messianic Jewish roommate kept the Sabbath and was a vegetarian, Cassandra was familiar with some aspects of Adventist practices, so she was fairly open to exploring Seventh-day Adventism. She attended Bible studies and vespers on campus with her new Adventist friends and often fellowshipped with them. Still, Cassandra was more comfortable with her Sunday-keeping, non-denominational upbringing, so she frequented a more traditional non-denominational church. Eventually, this church offered Cassandra a job leading their missions in Africa after her graduation. Africa studies was her major course of study at the University of Michigan, and she was thrilled. This was her dream job! However, she realized that if she were to represent a church, she needed to be sure that she believed everything her church taught. She began praying for God to lead and show her whether this was the church he wanted her to be in. Bit by bit, God began impressing Cassandra that some things in this church were not aligned with his ways, leading her to study the Bible fervently for answers. As she studied, the topic of the Sabbath kept coming up, driving Cassandra to ask her Adventist friends more serious questions about their faith. They happily obliged. “They never made me feel like a project,” Cassandra says gratefully. “They were friends… It wasn’t like a ‘come to my Bible study’… or, ‘come to an evangelistic series.’ They were building a relationship with me. They invested in me!”
In December of 2007, Cassandra accompanied her friends to a Generation of Youth for Christ meeting; there, she was fully convicted that God wanted her in the Adventist church. “It was just amazing,” she marvels. “I feel like God takes each individual heart and communicates with us what he wants us to know and be impressed by. There were different things that God was prodding on my heart, that this is the church that he wanted me to be in, so I let my friends know.” Cassandra’s Adventist friends were thrilled, and gave her Bible studies on the major pillars of Adventism to help deepen her understanding of the faith. Cassandra was baptized the following April. “I was so impressed by how much they knew their Bibles, and how firm their understanding was of what they believed,” she recalls. “There was an aspect of God’s character that I didn’t understand until I came to the Adventist Church.” Cassandra credits God for using her friends as instruments in her journey, modeling Christ’s love and cultivating relationships with her rather than preaching at her. She is now an advocate of the campus ministries that changed her life, going as far as serving as a campus missionary at the University of Michigan, and likens the mission to the Bible story of the friends who brought their paraplegic friend to Jesus for healing. “Scripture says that when Jesus saw their faith, their friend was made whole,” she explains. “And it wasn’t because of the faith of the paraplegic; it was because of the faith of his friends. I think that that is the power behind Campus Ministries specifically… ministering to those there that know Jesus, but don’t have a full picture, of those that have not even met him. And developing those relationships, and building those bridges, and modeling Christ to them and showing them God’s Word… you’re able to bring them to the feet of Jesus. And through your faith, people are made whole.” “God does amazing things in all of our lives,” she concludes, “when we surrender our lives to him. That’s the one thing that I have to remind myself of – that it’s not my story, it’s his story. That’s what a testimony is. It’s the story of how he saved us.”
Selma’s Story TItle By: Shannon Kelly Amet ma que nimaximi, voloribus entem quati torum suntur, corio mos sit explique eratemqui sundis accae vellorest officid unt quibus etur mil in con necabor eprovidit odis noneseque nim non consent labora voluptam, simus, simpor sitatur? Pissim lab id qui to consequi net, volores etur seque volest es voluptatur? Ulpariam facearum eati dolorehent repudi consequae eatus est, quo ea cusanihilici illit earcit dolorpo rrumquas doloris sed eosam as restrum quos audamet maion et molorep ressiti ssitaep editior reium que estiisit, temperiorro occates et quiate iumendicatem rehentia sunt. Niscid es et, qui officit atempor anda corempelia et, con ressimus, que niendellab in et quodipsus nulparum que nos dolores sitatur, solupta tiaspiciet ut aut vel inciendae plam, estem eos veribercidis aut et eate modi as enienis adisi dolorum quate venimol uptae. Nam conesti osaperum ant volessu sciasin ulparibusam, to quia si idicit aut laborer chiliquia pa volore volorepti resed quam es duciis moloreperum voluptasin estio est fugia es enis alis rem aut dunt hillorrorro iuntenet as ius, etume vollique sime nemporibus ipic tem etus nobitati quiam ducium aboribus. Ferovid endigenis ma voles mo volessi oditem ex et volore pos ut aut hiliquidebis es ma quunt doluptatust alitio. Eptatiisti voluptatam eatisqu isimus et voluptiae. Itaturessime vellitiante susae laborpo rempore doluptatur? Qui beataque doleceritio eum que porporest, optisti umenis nim quibus, sernam fugitat alit aut qui is sunt doluptae quaepel et ea illignatur, sus ex es es aborem alicius apienit omnis nimo beatiusda nullam enihill oratet a doles aut providi de quam nonsectis ex eictum fugit pa quos is porem velectur sitaqui restiis aut ad mi, alitibus etusdae ditiostion ea nus non et eos doluptas et aut ut abo. Itaest pore, in consequunt labore est omnihil ius, quis ent quam fugia quas conseceritis re aut enda consequodis aut qui ullatium volorectem aut offic temquistrunt que plaut ut omnis as dem. Sae nam, temo volor sa a quam sunt harchici tet ad es auta aniatur, quaspero eri im simus alis cus es et ommo mincto to od que est aut ma perunt modia natur? Genis eius que dolorro volum dentia nessim quatem sapiet aut ent qui untiatem. Ne voluptatque plitior erumquatum ab inctatium nit molore molluptat. Cea vellique voluptiis aut fuga. Et volorru ptatiam solessit, torio officae simi, venis maximin totatem qui nonecab ium et vendaepe re volendae magnim eici solesto reprovid magniendi aut ped quaercimus dolupiendam rempore ndellestis doluptat. Poreped et pellore el ipidicipsunt veliciiste ne non corrovita nis de nuscil incim doleseque vernatios explis eumque consequ ibuscid mincietur acerem id quo ium explia dolor repro eseque laborrum re aut haria velent asi bla voloria de eat. Sed minus et quatet que voluptate et pliquiae. Ur, auta aut que sequis experia qui blatqui que cum volorum nonseces expe minci conse pore, nulluptatum dolorem quodit ipic tem ut omnihitium assunt, que quatiandel et lant vel exerit ea eatem.
Sed ea et autatum re vidunt omniam que sam essinve lendis preperum, inum quuntia menist il mos ex endesecea duci il im ut etur, ipiendae corem et ullabor emperi sitisto coremperum que volo is plab il maior andaeperum faceatusae dest fuga. Vit ditat. El ma soloreratur? Harchicipsa dolecte dolorem fuga. Nequam ese dero officate sapellandis event quid eost veliquunt quo conseque por re magnihil ium re nesenet precaborem et venduci ra et offic tem ex explabo. Ibusae ne dolupta tibusapiscia quis eatia ni dolore as sitatianto ma voluptiur ad ut haris maio. Elestias dellorruptia dolupiendunt arciisquibus intisquident estrum hil mollaccus ad quiat alis essincid qui odicipsam, ut ped et fuga. Name officaerum de pel int hil illendellum nos qui re ipsum quaspe eosamusa int. Exceper ovitis delecupti alibus dolorro ducia doluptur sinctur acit exceaqui officium dolum ulparum int. Soloreptur, cusamus se lautas none aborepuditi aspeditet volendu ciende excesti simi, ullant aut verspid quid explique magnam dollo inctenis andus doluptaquis siti voloribus ea cusdant elita atia sitibust, quisqui scipsan dundipi tionsecto oditatiunt parcid molupta duntia ni occum inis ea perias estium rerumet reium eatur? Qui occumqui ommolore, numqui impostem unt ma dolorum ratusa id undignist eturibusae. Berum nem ipsuntu restotasit, consequi corehenis eaque la cullest aborio qui dit, sinctiu ndant, ut et eaque experia nobit volum quam reictes secaborro etur, nesto te ped eriate doluptat rehenienim eveliam quate int, suntum quis simaximint. Dis perum laborum fugit ut ommosanditia ne poreium eaqui restrunt. Te derioriatem non cust, ilitaque ommolen ihilitat quo temperis arumque rempore ptaepra que sunti as evereprovid untum si blabor aut re occuptae et volla as ut volupta voloris ut qui sam enis dioreptat. Ri cum incil molloria solorereicil et voluptat lab ipsum ium as ut qui aborestis ius, omnimodis es volor aspisimus aliquis as ped qui dolorem sinis nisi doluptae volo dolum volorerio impelignia assedit lit, ius, ad est a quam que magniam volliquia coreperum audae none atinciur? Ceaturis aces unt, nobis enissinis dolupta dolupiento et quam et eaquias aut ipiendunt qui
Git es enihill iscium et ipsamendant rem que modit, nonsed qui disitae volorec aborpor iorioria quibus, iunt voluptatem qui is peri ommostotat et escipsapici sequia nis derupta dolores cimusandi consed quam, optur sint est, cum fugia qui res ea quia ne sim quatius. Idelenimi, consequae sam accupta sum nobis adis sum venimagnate et veni qui voluptaerum endaepe maximus. It lacea ellate si alibusae rehent quis ut quia del modio blaut reribust, se deliquas alis earumqui ant. Udam conseque plissin nobis eum quam, omnisit elignat laut auteceri tem. Itatus, quis sequatur ariata inciasserume coris enia suntisi cuptis eos nem. Epero est volupta dolore volupta tempori busanissum quis ipsam que volor ape et et laborerum qui ide quissint endi to vent, nusa volorer iatini blabo. Tem ex ent explati il moluptur? Ibustrunt quiatquossum et labo. Uciam quas quatius, tem aut quunt reruptatur ad ut ent es et que laborit mod exerumque voluptat. Licid eius illibusam que essequiandes ressitis ipsam, ut aut mo officabo. Et vent oditiunt odipsam quamenimus eum facea conet aut anisi od elitium nonet aliquiatiur sequatquias sinvend igenda aut quibus planist et molut aditis aut eos doluptate re pro volorempos et vel id eum quo velit, adipsam quiatquatur as sum eaquam velitenture qui to vel mo od et latur re, a vent. Is ini nusto offictur? Edionse idempor alibus delentiam eaquias molorestibus sum, audae eseria quaectaepro eum harum ratur, corem cum aliciatem dolo ideliquia vitis eum cum re re voluptam fuga. Itatquatibus nis quidi occae laut qui sum dolor aliam, te la quament empersp ellatecuptas et aut volum fuga. Pore sus. Bitiumqui sed quod mo modis eum as as perepudio dundi rem qui cusciandit voluptas pos quatur? Ipsam que velest, que dolorem a nobisque nullaboritas adi blaccus dolorem eariate ndenis as nobitam quiandi ducimin vendam ea dolor alia dunderibus aut qui consed magnis re pedigni squunt recersperum ut que sincto te nisquiae commodit re conectur aut ut explam nossequis eatur, alis net rerum as et magni que doluptin esti cum et untinve runtemp orporem dis asserib uscime pel et latque doloreiciae volor sumquas perehen ditius diti blabo.
Sam, net laborum dolestecest excerfera quunt errum hicipsum res sume corpore mporibe rrovide od quati dita am, quam, consectat eiur sanducidus mi, omnit porum, que modissint re, officat emoluptatur, il maximusam fugiatiorror re, odis ex eum quibeatenet moluptatus nulparc idellat iation conestem reiust vellectatquo od ma cores quate num, apicipi endent. Giaerovit et voloreicabo. Solute vent explibe rumquo offic te culla voluptur alit et, cusam, si dolluptiore que provit quamust, sim qui volentore nos quam adi is utem hicto berum eos dolut aute nonsequi quae eum que derecus debit am quos del modi ipsuscia dit omnimpos expliquiatur minvenda explabo. Itas ilis asimperiae la venis quae conest porepudant quis eos nimust odion pre conserenim fugitiam velendes untiae di que sit, sit, et laborep tatiure rferrorit laborehenti con peliquam, te poratiam, offic to es debit ut dolorunt lam, imos sin renihiciam fugitem facepuda doluptatur andio quiatem ratiis as as quid quia quis dio veriam voluptas velendaecae. Elibus explitas a comnim que de ommolo blab id quam secte volor aut ad millabo. Ferferupta sandelis non excest lacerum debit, ex eumque pos voluptum esero vero quam, od et que solluptasin etur? Qui beriaepudae et ipsuscil eic to ent vel il iur? Sam velis esto beatquo es autet quam, quunt endaeria dolupta epellupta quodi ad eaquia dit es dus, si odit preritae prem volorecta sequi quibusc ienderr oribus sa volore quas et eum es exerum et qui dolum resto derferia veniendandus magnat. Untempo riaecusa inim etur, cum remo comnis ut officabore ipientiandi non pro quo blatur sequia non cullit, cor resti utatate mporepre volum cullautae cullatassin reiusam quam litium excepelitium quam, sunt, invelestibus molut magni tempore expliqu atiorro moluptat offic tempore, ut quatis sapiendit, ut eumetum inumqui andant. Ebita in nos ut officid ucipita sumquiasi nimporpora dus accus que porae eatem id molorio id mollut incto teceratem quo blaborem voluptiorrum quae everi voloriat digenia apienis et acia volorecat dia conessi molorporiam in perionsero molum quis exerumquate rescias estemporios parupta tecus, que as sinimenisi quiatectem et ped moluptat alignim ipsam voluptatur? Aximus, nita niminct ionsersperem quia quassi digenim inihit quiaspe lestibusa conectenit lis verum alis ne
Asunder Divorce. It is a topic that many Christians shy away from, or only speak about in whispers. The label of being “divorced” is shrouded in suggestions of shame and failure. Divorce in the Seventh-day Adventist Church is often treated as a taboo. Even though it happens, few know how to respond. Some individuals who have experienced divorce share the struggles they faced. Dr. Bradly Hinman, Assistant Professor at Andrews University in the Department of Graduate Psychology and Counseling and a private practice counselor specializing in marriage and family therapy, responds to three struggles that many divorcees face. Identity “I was not going to be one of those guys who gets divorced,” 36-year-old John Weiss said, reflecting on the year 2012 when he lost almost everything. “That wasn’t even a remote possibility in my mind.” John lost many things upon his divorce – his house, his dogs, a lot of his money – but he feels that the biggest thing he lost was his identity. “My label of husband, caretaker, provider… and now getting this new label of “divorced”… it just seemed like it was too much.” “It is normal to feel a loss of identity during divorce,” Dr. Hinman says. “Beginning at engagement the natural course of many (but not all) couples is for the individual to become less, and the couple to become more prevalent. I believe that is what the Bible meant when it said, “the two shall become one.”” He explains that when a relationship ends, an individual suffers loss of identity because of the sacrifices made for the relationship to work. In a relationship, individual identity becomes less and the relationship identity becomes greater. When people lose their relationship, through divorce for example, the person can feel as though they have lost a part of their identity. Hinman explicates that feelings such as confusion, anger, and grief are com-
-mon. “Individuals who are suffering from a divorce should remember who they were before the relationship started,” Hinman says. “They should surround themselves with people who are supportive and do things they enjoy. Write a list, keep it in your phone, pull it out and pick one when things get overwhelming.” Individual identity is an important thing to have; knowing who you are as a person matters. But if an individual’s identity is not found in God first, an identity crisis is inevitable. Remember that you are a child of God. “After the divorce was finalized, I spent maybe a year or two, or a few years, just me and God,” John recounts. “God started building a new life for me, and tearing down the old frameworks and the bad assumptions and helping me reexamine stuff from the past that needed to be dealt with.” John explains that since his divorce, God has been building a new life, as new identity for him, grounded in Christ. Today he serves as a producer at Your Story Hour. Can God Still Use Me Now? “I was so upset and broken and in pain,” a 35-year-old Theology professor at Andrews University says, recounting the story of her divorce. “I really thought I was going to lose everything.” She feared she would be let go from her job. “Who wants a divorced woman teaching theology?” she asked, laughing at the irony. She also thought she would lose her church ministry duties. She had been doing Pathfinders and youth work for quite some time. “I thought… I’d never be happy again,” she said simply. “I would look at my finger and miss my wedding ring… I felt like I wanted to hide my hands.” She wrestled desperately with shame and self-confidence. Despite these struggles and fears, her worst fear was not for herself; it was that her divorce had somehow damaged God’s reputation, simultaneously damaging her ability to work for Him. “What good can God do through me now?” she
wondered. “I’m tainted. I’m dishonorable to His name.” “People who invest their life working for God feel called to arrange their life as perfectly as they can,” Dr. Hinman responds. “Divorce is a serious matter for many Christians, and I feel it would be natural for someone who has devoted their life to service to the church would feel a sense of loss while going through a divorce.” He goes on to describe how this loss of the ideal life could be seen as a step backward, as loss, a failure, or a blemish on the worthiness of the individual. Dr. Hinman gives advice on what a person can do when experiencing shame or doubting whether he or she can be used by God: “Talk to a counselor, surround yourself with supportive people, and talk to other people who have successfully dealt with significant feelings of shame.” Satan loves to deceive and discourage us, trying to make us feel that we messed up too much for God to love and use us for His work. However, the Bible is replete with individuals who were sinful human disasters, and God still used them in mighty ways. King David, Abraham, and Moses all failed in terrible ways, but God used them mightily. No one is ever too tainted for God to transform into His servant.
Although the first year after her divorce was tough, Rahel says that God has turned this into one of the greatest witnessing opportunities of her life. I did not lose my job or my ministries! I have been in counseling and groups for years and God has used that, along with many other wonderful people and experiences, to bring me great healing and joy. In fact, God has turned what I thought would destroy me, into something powerful!” She shares her story publicly, showing the healing power of God’s love and grace. “He has given me joy beyond imagining with His presence and care.” She continues to lead her church’s pathfinder club and youth group while serving as assistant professor of Biblical Hebrew. An Uncertain Future 37-year-old Andrews University student and United States Air Force veteran, Amy Manjarres, was married for five years before her divorce. In July of 2014, while stationed in Turkey, the Air Force notified Amy that she would be one of many to be discharged. It was a devastating blow. Not only was her marriage falling apart; now her career was too. Soon, Amy found herself unemployed and newly divorced. Her whole future, so set in stone not long ago, was uncertain. She felt like a complete failure, longing for something in
life that would make her feel worth her existence. “The fact that I became one more statistic was devastating,” Amy said. “In this case, both her career and her marriage were supposed to last for a very, very long time,” Dr. Hinman explains. “When things are supposed to last for a long time and they don’t, we go through a period of mourning, anxiety, and powerlessness.” A good job and a thriving relationship are factors that give us a sense of accomplishment. If these things are taken against our will, it makes us question how much of any of our life is within our control. Hinman says, “Divorce can be devastating, but in my opinion, should not necessarily be viewed as a failure. What people in this position generally need from other people is a listening ear, understanding, and compassion. Many times, it helps people to feel better just to be able to express themselves and talk about the awful turn their life has taken.” In addition to this, he counsels that helping a person plan for what to do next can help with attaining a sense of control and getting back on his or her feet. It is human nature to want control over our every circumstance, to want a concrete plan for our lives. But things do not always work out that way. Even in the face of an uncertain future, God promised us that no matter how hopeless the future seems, He has good plans in store. We can truly claim the promise given in the familiar text, Jeremiah 29:11: “’For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord. ‘Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.’” (NIV) As to how she is now coping with the uncertainties about her future, Amy says, “It causes anxiety; however, I’m working on being more dependent and trusting of God. I try to internalize Bible examples of God’s faithfulness to man, and I am also trying to take courage from close friends’ personal experiences with trusting our Father.” Today, Amy is pursuing a Bachelor’s
degree in Psychology and she hopes to use her new profession to serve Christ. How should individuals in the Church respond when one of their brothers or sisters in Christ is going through a divorce? “Be supportive, loving, and accepting,” Dr. Hinman says plainly. “I know that sounds simple, but these qualities are vastly underused today.” He explains that many persons are uncomfortable around topics such as divorce or death, but instead of reacting in judgment or condemnation, we should ask what we can do for the person. “We should not offer advice unless they ask,” he cautions. “Unsolicited advice can come across as judgment or condemnation.” Our Heavenly Father reminds us in Isaiah 43:2, “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.”
Not By Sight She has been called the “new Picasso”… and she is legally blind. Artist Lauren Mills was born with Nystagmus, an eye disease in which the eyes are constantly wiggling. While she can see minute specks up close, she does not see well beyond what is immediately in front of her. Still, these physical struggles never impeded Lauren’s affinity for art. By ten months old, she was drawing incessantly. At age six, Lauren accompanied her mother, Leah Chapman, to a college art class she was attending. The professor noted young Lauren’s excellent ability to see perspective. Chapman was blown away. “How is it possible that she’s able to do this, this thing called art that takes – in my mind’s eye – visual capacity to do well?” she wondered. She realized that her daughter’s talent was “beyond human ability”; it had to be a gift from God. “I don’t think I’ve ever had a moment where my vision has really stopped my art,” the 17-year-old says. “I never really felt like it played a negative part in how I created things.” In fact, she uses this would-be setback to her advantage. To “quiet” her eyes, Lauren must look at things extremely closely, giving her extraordinary attention to detail. “People think that I’m lying to them when I say that I’m legally blind, because my detail work in my paintings I’ve heard is pretty good,” she laughs. “She doesn’t see her visual condition as a disability,” Chapman adds. “She calls it her perfect sight.” At age eleven, Lauren started her own art company, called “Artologi.” After creating the website and posting some samples of her work, Lauren began getting occasional commissions. Her art really took off, however, when she began attending fairs as a vendor at her grandmother’s encouragement. Lauren had no formal art training growing up, but over the past few years, she has had the opportunity to attend classes at the prestigious institutions of Interlochen Art Institute, University of Michigan, and School of Art Institute in Chicago. These programs were costly, but just when attendance seemed impossible, God always provided. Thanks to scholarships and donations from others, Lauren was able to participate in these programs. Amidst her success, Lauren remains humble, never forgetting who blesses her. “I don’t see myself as anything really huge, or like I’m a star or something,” she says. “I know definitely it was God and not me... I feel like God’s been a crutch for me, because I don’t really stand alone in my life.” She cites Jeremiah 1:5. “Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you…” “It was about how God knew him before he was born, and he ordained him, and basically set his future up for him. That’s how I saw my art career… God just kind of set my life up,” she explains. Lauren loves using her gift to glorify God. She designed a banner for an evangelistic series held at her school; she sometimes gifts paintings to Pastors at various churches; most recently, she designed the Lake Region Conference pins
for the last Pathfinders Oshkosh. As the co-AY leader at her home church, Lauren hopes to establish an art program for the young people there, teaching them to express themselves in a “nondestructive” way. Having participated in a few art shows with others, she is hoping to develop her first solo show in the future. Since graduating from Peterson-Warren Academy in June, Lauren enrolled at Oakwood this fall where she is studying commercial art and history. “My schedule is crazy,” she said one evening after finishing up a worship service on campus. Between choir, work, and classes, she is determined to fit art in, somehow. “My only free time is Saturday nights, and that’s when I plan to paint.” She opened an online store over the summer and plans to devote time to that, too. The store features products such as t-shirts, bags, and pillows emblazoned with the “colored girl rainbow,” a patch of striped hues in various shades of brown. “I try to be myself in my art, so that other people will know that it’s okay to be yourself,” Lauren said simply. “I’m definitely not one that has fit into a mold, or that really wants to, so that’s kind of what I try to say in my art at the core.”
Single Life “So, are you dating anyone yet?” This question becomes inevitable, especially when you reach your adult years and are still single while many of your childhood friends are getting engaged and married. Much of society seems to have an expectation that when you grow up, you get married. The notion is that if you stay single, you cannot have a happy, fulfilling life. Being single is too often seen as a failure – a perception that is entirely false. Whether you are single and waiting for “the one”, or if you are choosing to remain unmarried, there is nothing to be ashamed of. Dating and marriage are absolutely beautiful, and if that is your desire, you should absolutely go for it. But what must also be understood is that being single is not a bad thing. Some adults weighed in on why it’s OK to be single. Here are their top reasons.
Singleness is reality. Being single, whether by choice or by chance, is not an awful, strange or unfulfilling way to live. Pastor Dwight Nelson, Lead Pastor of Pioneer Memorial Church, explained that God created humans to be relational beings, but “the post-Eden reality is that not all marry.” “While God has an ideal, He lives with the real,” Pastor Nelson said. “And the real is, we don’t all get married. The real is, we don’t all want to get married. The real is, we don’t have to get married. The real is that, professionally and personally, a person can live a very fruitful life and never marry.”
Are you ready to be selfless? When you are married or in a relationship with someone, you consult your partner about almost every decision you make. Decisions about where to go to school, where to work, where to live, what to do in your spare time… you are no longer just looking out for yourself alone. Relationships involve compromise, and if compromise cannot happen, a healthy relationship cannot flourish.
Marriage may not fit everyone’s lifestyle. 30-year-old freelance photographer/ filmmaker, Tanya Musgrave, is a single woman with a lively career that keeps her traveling around the country constantly. As a result, she is never in one place for long. “Where I am in my life right now, I would never be home,” she said. “I’m kind of flitting from one place to another… I don’t even know if somebody would want to be in a relationship with somebody who is barely there.” She is completely open to being in a relationship should someone come along who could keep up with her. The thought of marriage someday appeals to her. However, she recognizes that she is not ready to settle down yet, and until she is, she is fulfilled by the work that she loves and the friendships she makes.
You have time to focus on becoming who you want to be while you’re single. “I don’t feel like I’m the person I want to give to someone,” 23-year-old student, Bohdana Gayle, said. Gayle explained that if she wants to be in a relationship, she needs to give it “110 [percent],” but before she can do that, she feels that there are certain parts of her life that she needs to work on. “If I want to receive the best, I feel like I need to be able to give the best…And I’m just not there.” She would rather wait until she feels personally prepared for a relationship than dive into one and hurt her significant other in the end. This does not mean you have to have yourself all figured out, but learning more about who you are and what you want in life is a good way to prepare for any future.
Singleness can be a unique gift from God. Some people actually choose not to marry and are content that way. Pastor Nelson referred to the Apostle Paul – himself a single man - as an example. In 1 Corinthians 7:7, Paul says, “I wish that all of you were as I am [unmarried]. But each of you has your own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that.” Not only does Paul actually advocate the single lifestyle, but in the last half of the verse, he implies that singleness can be a spiritual gift. “Paul’s little insertion there… indicates that singleness can be a gift from God, fruitfully exercised for the building up of God’s kingdom,” Pastor Nelson said.
You are able to focus on developing your relationship with Christ above all. Human relationships may come and go, but a relationship with Jesus is eternal. He craves a personal relationship with you more than anything. Take time to get to know Jesus, the lover of your soul. Let Him help you clean out your proverbial “junk drawer” that is the human heart. Ask Him to reveal any hidden sins and areas of your life that you need to work on, then work on those with Him. Build on the foundation of Jesus Christ. Christians couples will say that a firm foundation in Jesus is key to having a lasting marriage, but this foundation is not crucial in marriage only. “This is not just a foundation if you get married,” Pastor Nelson said. “This is a foundation if you’re living.”