PLUS: diy pumpkin frap | fall crafts | fitness from the inside out | cut out for couponing?
TM
Fall 2013 $5.95 US/CAN
Liz Hurley Celebrating
10 years
of running to fight breast cancer
Combating Bullying — Finding your true identity
Groundwire:
breaking through the noise of the world
www . shatteredmagazine . net
singer
PLUMB
shares story of
reconciliation
Escaping a secret life of Domestic Violence
+13
Date Ideas for you and your
spouse
He
redeemed my soul from going down to the pit,
and I will
live to enjoy the light.
job
33:28
Our Team: Our Hearts for Shattered
Rachael
I started Shattered Magazine soon after my mom died. I watched her struggle for so long with so many ailments — physical and emotional — and I knew that some people just didn’t get it. They would question her faith and the purpose of her life — was it wasted? My answer is emphatically “No!” She loved the Lord with all her heart and He used her for His glory. He used her to reach out to people whom only she could reach. The desire of my heart has been and will continue to be to reach out to people who struggle in this life and let them know that they matter. I want people to have an eternal perspective on their stories and the lives that they lead. I want people to know the strength that they can find in a relationship with Christ and how He will work ALL things together for His glory and our good. Shattered Magazine is unique because we strive to really get to the heart of the matter behind every life event and life issue. I am so thankful to God for giving me this opportunity to serve Him like this and hopefully bless many for His glory!
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Morgan
If you had asked me a year ago “Where do you see yourself in a year's time?” I certainly would not have said, “Oh, probably helping start a magazine and a movement toward authentic living and true freedom in Christ, and I’ll be doing it with 3 amazing ladies to boot!” Who other than God could have orchestrated that one? I was looking for my next cue from Him when Shattered came along. It was a total God setup in every way. From the friends he brought into my life at just the right time to where I was personally, it all seemed to fall together. I know in another year I am going to be thinking the same thing, as I will then see myself in another season of life. I seriously cannot wait to see how God uses both Shattered and me to reach others to make Him known. The song “Oceans” by Hillsong United resonates so strongly with me right now: “Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders, let me walk upon the waters wherever You would call me. Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander, and my faith will be made stronger in the presence of my Savior.”
Andrea
When I was younger, I always had a deep connection with book and movie characters that were involved in the publishing industry in some way. In my travels as I got older, I had seen some of the most impressive libraries in the world, and always lingered in old bookstores with the musty smell of their pages waiting to find new homes. Way back then, a little desire was planted in my heart to somehow get closer into that world, and little by little, and almost undetected by me, God kept planting opportunities in my life to fan that fire into something bigger. And I knew that no matter what I ended up doing with my life, I wanted it to matter, to make a true difference in people’s lives, and to always point the way to my great God. But being part of starting a Christian magazine that would bring all my deepest desires together in one place would never have entered my mind. As I read and hear stories that people are beginning to tell us, I see the fire getting even brighter. I see more of how big our God is, of how big His plans were for me, and how much bigger they have yet to become. What a blessing it is to reach out to others to join the ride.
Meet our Interns! s
Lauren Hand ley
in t r a M e i t s i Kr
Jessica Edelman Our interns have been our lifesavers! From Kristie's servant heart as she runs around distributing magazines and keeping Rachael sane(er), to Jessica and Lauren's fantastically creative design help (thanks to them, this issue looks even better!), we couldn't have have asked for sweeter girls to help us get Shattered out to you.
Diane
I am so blessed that God providentially placed me in this place at this time to share with the world how great our God is. God is with us — that is my mantra. I want others to realize that they and their life's experiences are important. God has given each of us a story. For some, it is a story of abuse, loss of a loved one, drug abuse, domestic violence...the list of shattered moments in our lives could go on and on. But I have good news, those shattered moments can be redeemed. The broken pieces of our lives can be restored to a beautiful and unique story of God's sovereignty over all parts of our lives. He loves us unconditionally and with that love He reaches down and brings healing to our lives. He takes what was meant for harm and creates it to bring a unique purpose for our lives. He gave us a story. A story that gives us an amazing opportunity to share God's amazing love and bring glory to His name. I became a part of Shattered to share with our readers that they and their stories do matter and that our God is an awesome God who can take the deepest shattered moments in a person's life and turn it into a beautiful masterpiece of love and redemption.
Look where Shattered went!
Tami Bolte took Shattered with her all the way to Paris this summer! Thanks, Tami, for sharing Shattered half way across the world! Send us your pic of Shattered on your travels to publicrelations@shatteredmagazine.net.
w w w
.
s h a t t e r e d m a g a z i n e
.
n e t
editor-in-chief
Rachael Jackson copy editor
/ business development
Diane Floate design and pr director
Andrea Wilhelm photography director
Morgan Knight webmaster
Lee Dannelly assistant photographer
staff writers
Scott Wallace
Katie Caldwell Anna Hithersay Amy Knight Kristie Martins Sandy Robinson Emily Rogers Abby Ricks Kristen Statler Christina Stolaas
assistant editors
Charity Bellmon Kristie Martins Amy Piers Emily Rogers Stacey Roy Danielle Scott
like us
facebook.com/shatteredmag
follow us
@shatteredmag
Your story, His glory You’re not alone. Your story could help encourage someone going through a similar time in their lives. Share it with us, and we might share it in an upcoming issue. Email us your submissions to emily@shatteredmagazine.net or send submissions to Shattered Magazine, 6275 University Drive, Ste 37-452, Huntsville, AL 35806. All submissions and materials become the property of Shattered Magazine and cannot be returned. Submissions may be edited for length or clarity and may be used without compensation. Please include a daytime telephone number and email address for verification and contact purposes. We may publish letters, emails, and Facebook posts. We may also edit them for grammar, spelling, length, and clarity.
Fall 2013, Volume 1, Issue No.2 Š Copyright 2013 Shattered Magazine. All Rights Reserved. Printed by Publications Press, Montgomery, AL. Reproduction in whole or in part is prohibited without permission from Shattered Magazine, Inc. No rights for commercial use or exploitation are given or implied. All opinions, advice, teachings and perspectives expressed in this magazine are not necessarily those of the editors and no liability for their use or misuse exists. Shattered Magazine is published quarterly (Spring, Summer, Fall, and Winter) by Shattered Magazine, Inc. 6275 University Drive, Ste 37-452, Huntsville AL 35806. Application to Mail at Periodical Prices is Pending at Huntsville, AL. POSTMASTER: please send address changes to Shattered Magazine, 6275 University Drive, Ste 37-452, Huntsville AL 35806. Subscriptions: Order on our website at www.shatteredmagazine.net Press/Event Inquiries: Email andrea@shatteredmagazine.net Marketing/Advertising Questions: Email morgan@shatteredmagazine.net Editorial and Columnist Questions: Email emily@shatteredmagazine.net; submissions become the property of Shattered Magazine
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On the Inside
24 Real Life
Relationships
10 Then a Soldier, Now a Mama 13 The One True Friend 16 Marriage in Hardship: A Walk 19
Through the Storm Falling into Romance...Again
67 Real Hope
Real Purpose
Get to Know Jesus
The Least of These
50 Hope in Suffering
62 In Christ, we are...
The He[art] of Cooking 36 A Topper of a Meal 37 A Bowlful of Comfort 38 The Spice of Life... In a Frap Health and Beauty 39 41 44 45 47
Altar'd by Fashion A Fashion Cocktail Beauty from Within Thank God for the Downhill The Heart Behind Fitness
73 Sean Dunn: Interrupting the World
Go and Tell 87 Growing Boulder in God 90 Rwanda: Doors Open Wide All We Say and Do
80 Turning Something Old
Great Plan
22 Out of Necessity 24 Bringing Fall to
30 For the Brave at Heart
Time
54 Reconciliation: God's Encouragement
27 Gracehaven
71 Loving: One Load at a
Grow in Jesus
For the Home
Your Front Door
71
into Something New
92 In the Potter's Hands
Community Life 83 Dayspring: Ministering
Reconciled
85
64 Accepting the Challenge 67 Unexpected Blessings:
to the Wounded Sparks are Flying
All photography in Shattered was taken by Morgan Knight of Hung the Moon Photography unless otherwise noted.
My Angel
Feature Stories Broken but not 32 Defeated shared by "Victoria
Rose"
Liz Hurley: Survivor & Champion
56 You 76 Need Now
shared by Liz Hurley
Look for these designs by BW Prints in the following pages! BW Prints is an independently owned paper goods business that creates art prints based on Bible verses, quotes, and life experiences, plus cards, invitations, and more. BW Prints’ sole owner, Bobbi Welzel, loves nothing more than igniting God’s Word through design for people to display in their homes. You can order her work and see more designs at www.etsy.com/shop/BWPrints. You can also email her at bobbi.welzel@gmail.com.
shared by Plumb
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Letter from the Editor
True reconciliation comes through relationships; relationships are built on experiences. Our experiences, both good and bad, are what we hope to share in Shattered Magazine. Through these stories shared, we hope that you will begin to notice the times when God is inviting you to experience Him as well.
F
all has always been my favorite time of year. It feels and smells familiar providing an inner warmth of memories past amidst the cooler days. The reminder of family, friends, and God’s faithfulness come to me through the smell of wood smoke from chimneys or fire pits sending its aroma sweetly throughout the golden pops of color and valleys laced with fog.
Fall is also an incredibly powerful time of awareness for some big issues and we hope to shed God’s light onto these struggles: Breast Cancer and Domestic Violence. We are delighted to feature Liz Hurley, a breast cancer survivor and a champion of cancer awareness. We are also delighted to bring some much needed awareness, hope, and help to women who are suffering through or have ever been a victim of domestic abuse. May God hold you close and wrap you with the assurance that He loves you and that He has it all in His hands. Blessings,
Our theme for this fall issue is, what else, family, friends, and reconciliation — the ultimate reconciliation. Relationship is the beginning and the end of who we are and our ultimate “who we are” is where we find a one true relationship with Christ. It is in this relationship that we are reconciled and through our reconciliation we are redeemed (freed from what harms us or holds us captive) and restored (to a status of a child of God). We hope that just as I have experienced the smells and golden hues of the fall and have found them to be a sweet experience reminding me of God’s grace that you will find through a relationship with Christ the EXPERIENCE of knowing Him. After all, you can debate doctrine, the existence of God, or the goodness of God all day long and find arguments on both sides of the fence, but you will truly KNOW God when you EXPERIENCE Him.
PLUS: diy pumpkin frap | fall crafts | fitness from the inside out | cut out for couponing?
tM
Fall 2013 $5.95 US/CA
Liz Hurley Celebrating
10 years
of running to fight breast cancer
Combating Bullying — FINDING YOUR TRUE IDENTITY
Groundwire:
breaking through the noise of the world
www . shatteredmagazine . net
8
shattered
| fall 2013
singer
PLUMB
shares story of
reconciliation
ESCAPING A SECRET LIFE OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
+ 13
Date Ideas for you and your
spouse
Did you know that when you order a subscription to Shattered, you also get online access to both the articles as well as an online version of the entire magazine? That's three different ways you can read Shattered! Get your online access today by ordering your subscription at www.shatteredmagazine.net.
{
Real Life
}
Fall. The hot scorching rays of the sun are subsiding. A breeze is playing with your hair and you smell it — the first hint of the changing season. We welcome the cooler nights, the smell of cinnamon and pumpkin, the leaves accepting their fate with flying colors. The new time unfolding means an end to the season past, but hints at the hope of what life will bring in the unopened days ahead. Life heeds its lessons from the changing days and urges us to celebrate the end of one season and the beginning of another. We are poetically reminded that we aren't stuck in one spot forever; that God always has just what we need ahead, the soothing coolness of his peace and the refreshing whisper of his love.
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Relationships
Then a Soldier, Now a Mama by
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Rachael Jackson
shattered
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“We are called to train our children in what is right.” mother’s day
2013…
I really thought that this day would be somewhat normal, if not a little bit special, but God had a different plan for me. Starting at 7:30, my normal morning self could not find the energy in three cups of coffee to get going. Falling back in bed, I wanted nothing more than to just close my eyes and let sleep claim me for 10 more hours. But, that’s not what moms do. The day spiraled down from there. My three and a half year old son made it his mission that day to make my life a living hell, and his 22 month old sister willingly followed suit. Their disobedience quickly turned to arrogant insolence as they downright dared me and my husband to make them obey. It felt as if I might not even exist since the words coming out of my mouth seemed to travel through the black holes in our universe, never to be heard and certainly never to be obeyed. And then, it all culminated in me blowing my lid off — almost literally. At the nine millionth ignored directive to my young offspring, I screamed at the top of my lungs, “I MUST NOT EVEN EXIST!” I was done. I wanted nothing more than to crawl up in a ball and bury myself in shame. Tears started to roll down my son’s face in heartbreak and disbelief. My husband’s face registered shock. My daughter — well, honestly, I’m not sure she cared. But she did look at me weird. I started to cry. I begged forgiveness. My son said, “It’s okay mama,” and we moved on. However, sensing weakness in my armor, the little angel
then went on the warpath. Ugly mean things came out of his mouth towards me — completely disrespectful and inappropriate behavior for a child to a parent. It might have made me feel better to think “I deserve this” or “he’s just expressing his feelings about what I did” or some other nonsensical guilt trip to blame myself for his behavior, but that is not what we are called to do. We are called to train our children in what is right. It doesn’t mean that we will have it all together and be the perfect example for them one hundred percent of the time. After all, I had messed up. Big time. I lost my cool, and I was worn out — weary and sick of it all — but I am still mama. He must still respect and obey me.
our commitment On days like my Mother’s Day, when overwhelmed by attacks and feelings of defeat or inadequacy, it is so essential to have something to turn to: a reminder of my dedication and commitment, a call to accomplish my mission, and a description of who I am as a parent as seen through God’s eyes. Soldiers need that to. In the heat of battle, stress can overwhelm even the strongest of our heroes. Cracks in their armor can ultimately lead to meltdown and disaster. It’s in those times of extreme pressure that our hero must be given something to resort to, to remember and be encouraged by, to live by, and to fight by. For the Army, that’s the Soldier’s Creed. It is drilled into soldiers from day one. They memorize it, recite it upon command, and learn to love it. The intention is to build in them the ethos needed to do their job and to do it well — never give up! fall 2013
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Soldier’s Creed I am an American Soldier. I am a warrior and a member of a team. I serve the people of the United States, and live the Army Values. I will always place the mission first. I will never accept defeat. I will never quit. I will never leave a fallen comrade. I am disciplined, physically and mentally tough, trained and proficient in my warrior tasks and drills. I always maintain my arms, my equipment and myself. I am an expert and I am a professional. I stand ready to deploy, engage, and destroy, the enemies of the United States of America in close combat. I am a guardian of freedom and the American way of life. I am an American Soldier. In order to provide the mantra needed for those “less than perfect” moments, I modified the Soldier’s Creed, something that I used to hold so dear, to fit my new identity of parent.
Parent’s Creed I am a Christian Parent. I am a leader and member of a team. I serve the Lord first and my family always. I live in light of the grace, love, and mercy I have received at the cross of Jesus Christ. I will always place my mission as a parent above my own desires. Though it may get hard and I will fail at times, I will never accept defeat. I will never quit. I will never leave my family. I am disciplined: physically, mentally, and emotionally tough through the power of Christ. I maintain my relationships with the utmost care, attention, and humility. I am an expert, a leader, and a professional — I am full of love, compassion, concern, and patience. I stand ready to deploy, engage, and destroy the enemy of myself, my family, and my children — Satan. His attacks against us will not succeed because of the victory I can claim in the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. I am a guardian of my family and our way of life, but I ultimately submit to a higher authority and will allow Him to lead us down the path He would have us travel. I am a Christian Parent. When things don’t go exactly right, a leader needs to remember that they are human. You will make mistakes and you will let yourself and others down. But, upon owning up to your mistakes and changing, you are still the leader. You must still maintain order, discipline, and focus. Don’t allow Satan to sneak into your home through guilt that you might place on yourself. No matter what it is, you have to pick up your boots, dust them off, and try again.
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The One True Friend by
Kristie Martins
I
t’s something hundreds of kids go through at school. It’s something hundreds of kids are intentionally and sometimes unintentionally encouraging. It’s that issue, even though schools try to stop it, that seems to never cease. It’s called bullying.
who’s to blame? Kids who are bullied often question how they’re to blame. They try to find a way to fix themselves, believing that it’ll stop the mistreatment. But when their plan backfires, the same questions return to their melting pot of thoughts: What did I ever do wrong? What if they were getting picked on? How would they feel? It’s not unusual to think these thoughts, and it’s not unusual to be a victim. I was a victim. Throughout preschool and elementary school, I attended a private Christian academy. And ever since first grade, girls disliked me. Whether it was resentment because I made good grades or jealousy because I hung out with their best friend, they simply refused to express any kind of genuine kindness. Of course, that sort of best friend drama was normal for little girls. For first graders, situations got pretty extreme. On one occasion, a girl ordered her sister to threaten to beat me up on the playground simply because she believed I was stealing her best friend. Although measures weren’t always this life-threatening, girls and even some guys never ceased to have a problem with me. To make matters worse, due to the school’s small size, my class generally consisted of the same people each year, so, naturally, the bullying continued.
mistreatment medley It wasn’t until fifth and sixth grade that the mistreatment medley really boiled out of the fall 2013
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“
God used those instances to lay down a foundation of trust in Him at a young age so that I could be reminded of his faithfulness whenever I faced bigger trials. In those moments, I had not a single friend to help me through my hurt except for One.
”
pan. During those years, my mother taught certain subjects to my class, and as soon as my mom scribbled an “unacceptable” grade on one of my classmate’s papers, I became the punching bag. Girls gathered in the bathroom to gang up on me. People pretended to like me just long enough to ask me for help with grammar or math. I eventually lost my best friend to the class who loathed me; I lost all “friends” and even a part of who I was. Soon I was having outbursts in class or telling someone off because I couldn’t tolerate it anymore. I had no way of releasing my anger except through channels of public outburst and — in secret — tears.
a change of scenery After sixth grade, though, I was able to escape the Christian academy by transferring to a public K-8 school. From the moment I stepped on campus, I was a different student. Not once did I have an outburst. Classmates didn’t dislike me for succeeding. But I wasn’t everyone’s best friend either; I did face issues with people, but we found mature ways to deal with our differences. Through that school, I was able to skip the eighth grade and develop some of the greatest relationships that continue to inspire me today.
the darts You see, my mother always told me that God has a purpose for me; she was absolutely right. The devil knew it too; therefore, I believe he tried to destroy that purpose. But my God stood in front of me while the devil threw his darts. Though some of them did wound me, God kept them from destroying me. What the devil intended for evil, God took and turned it to my advantage. He paired the darker scenes from the early years of my life with the brighter middle years to construct a wheelchair of experiences that rolled me into a more advanced mindset — one that had no ambiguity.
faithful friend I was never sure of the true purpose of the bullying phase of my life until just recently at the age of sixteen. God used those instances to lay down a
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foundation of trust in Him at a young age so that I could be reminded of his faithfulness whenever I faced bigger trials. In those moments, I had not a single friend to help me through my hurt except for One. Even as a child, I knew He was my friend and that He was walking right beside me along that narrow path. He completely reshaped my character from an anger-driven, outburst-prone kid into a young adult who has truly known a relationship with Him and loves to spread the joy of God.
the world we live in Regarding bullies — there will always be people who mistreat you. That’s the world we live in. All I know for sure is that everyone needs forgiveness and mercy, even when they don’t deserve it. God forgave me and showed me mercy when I didn’t deserve it because He loved me. He has asked me to do the same for others — that they may know Him as well. And just as I prayed to God for faith and hope during my battles, I pray that my expression of God’s love toward those who mistreat(ed) me would cause their hearts to change so that they can catch a glimpse of my amazing God. No one is alone in the battle against bullying. Like I said, hundreds of kids experience it in some form or fashion. All you have to do is remember that your Creator is the only one who defines you. Neither people, circumstances, nor bullying can place a label on you. In times of trial, hold these two keys in your hand in order to remain strong: trust in Him and love others. That is how you win not only the battle but also the war. I am a conqueror in Jesus Christ — that is how He defines me.
Seriously in touch with her creative side, Kristie loves to spend her spare time baking and making scrapbook cards. She has recently discovered why God placed an interest in her heart for such things: to spread the love and joy that He has given her. As an intern at Shattered, she’s learning how to use her passion for writing for His glory, a practice she will continue as she pursues a journalism major.
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T
he following words paint an ugly but real picture of what it feels like to struggle with miscarriage and infertility. Unfortunately, this is an all too common struggle. For many people, like me, the struggle can quickly consume every aspect of your life and deeply affect your relationships with the people you love the most. It is a roller coaster of emotions that will test your faith and in my case, my marriage. If you find yourself in this place right now, my heart aches for you and with you because I know it is such a difficult place to be. Let me encourage you that even if God feels far away right now, He is there. He has always been there. He will never leave you. Even if you already feel abandoned — He is there. God is big enough to meet you in your unbelief and strengthen your marriage in the midst of your suffering — no matter the cause of your suffering. I know because this is what God has done for me. This past year, at times, felt like one I would quickly like to forget. After losing three pregnancies, it has been the hardest and most challenging year of my life especially as a Christian. I quickly found that being a Christian was easy when life was going my way, but I started to doubt and question God when it wasn’t. Where was God in all of this? How could he let us suffer? How much more pain would we have to endure before this would be over? A seed of doubt had been planted in my heart — a doubt of God’s love — and it quickly grew, creating an extreme and obvious distance between God and me. Rather than reaching out for God, I let my doubt consume me. The distance I felt with God began to reflect in my marriage as I helplessly and hopelessly struggled with my grief. As the one year mark of our first loss approached, I felt the weight of everything we had been through heavy on my shoulders and I was tired of feeling like I was walking through it alone. Feelings of anger, bitterness, and resentment began to surface toward my husband and his perceived ability to move forward. I began to doubt his love. Why wasn’t he grieving like me? How could his world keep turning when I felt like mine is at a standstill? Didn’t he care about everything my poor body had been through? Didn’t he care about our losses? What about the countless poking and prodding doctor visits that left us with no answers or explanations? Why wasn’t he feeling the same emotional turmoil I was? How was he able to move on when I still felt so broken? Does he even feel this with me at all?
A Walk through the Storm by
Kristin Statler
fall 2013
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“Then the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, he made into a woman, and He brought her to the man. And Adam said, ' This is now bone of my bones, and f lesh of my f lesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.'” Genesis 2:22-23 My grief felt like a dark cloud that was never going to leave. I felt trapped beneath it and I was angry that he wasn’t trapped with me. I didn’t want to hear his positive attitude and words of encouragement. I wanted him to share in my agony and tell me how awful and unfair it all was. I needed him to talk about his feelings and I desperately wanted them to match mine. I needed him to fall apart with me — but he refused. Instead he sat, listened, and discussed every time I needed to talk, but he refused to give in to my pity party. Rather than pausing to see that quality in him as a strength, I mistook it for insensitivity. I missed the opportunity to see his difference in grieving as a gift, his positivity as a counterpart to my deep feelings of sadness, and his stability as a blessing in my emotional turmoil. In Genesis, God speaks of creating Eve because he recognized it wasn’t good for Adam to be alone. What I love most about this verse is the reassurance that we are not made to be the same, yet we are still made to be unified. This verse didn’t say that God made an exact replica of man, it says he took a piece of man to create woman. Despite the differences we have as men and women, God clearly created us that way for a purpose. His purpose was not to draw us apart but to make us a complete reflection of God together.
“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”
2 Corinthians 12:9
God began to show me that the fact that my husband didn’t grieve like me didn’t mean that he didn’t grieve at all. There was nothing wrong with the way I grieved and there was nothing wrong with the way he grieved; it was just different. He felt the heartbreaking sting of every loss as I did, yet he was able to compartmentalize and still see hope in the future. If it hadn’t been for my husband’s emotional strength over the last year, I would probably still be laying in the corner of a dark room in the fetal position. His strength and leadership raised me from my agony and was able to show me the way out of my anger and disconnection — with him and with God. While it angered me that he wouldn’t give into my pity party, he remained strong and refused to leave me in that dark place because he knew that’s what I needed. His differences made up for what I lacked and that included my faith.
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I now recognize my need for repentance. I had been so caught up in my own suffering I allowed it to become my identity. I began to see how God was using my husband as a blessing to pull me through this suffering and I made the decisions to look for that blessing. Instead of expecting him to grieve like me, I began to focus on the ways he would grieve. I began to focus on his efforts to support me. He had attended every doctor’s visit with me. He had held my hand as they prepped me for surgery. He had prayed for us as we continued to seek answers and peace. He had used scripture from the Bible to encourage me. He had held me as I cried more times than I can count and he showed me grace as he patiently walked with me through this journey. He had been reflecting our steadfast God to me. God’s light prevailed in my darkness through my husband. What a beautiful gift. If you are struggling to see God in the storm, no matter what is causing the storm, that’s OK. You are not alone in that struggle. I encourage you to continue seeking God while you walk this path and to do it with your spouse. If you question God, seek his word for a response. God knows that we will have moments of doubt — we will question, we will be weak, and we will falter. What God wants us to know is that not only is He big enough to handle those moments, He will and has already overcome them.
If you find yourself at a point in life where you are single and struggling, wishing you had someone to walk through it with you, realize this important fact as well — the Lord your God is walking with you. He is your constant companion and will fulfill your every need. He has provided you the opportunity to find the support you desperately need in prayer and constant communion with Him and in the community of Christ — the body of the Church. God is always working, even when it is hard for us to see. Don’t miss the opportunity to see His blessings, His calmness, and His comfort among even the most violent storm.
Falling into Romance...
Again by
Erin Lindsey
M
any couples fall into a dating rut at some point in their relationships. The rut may occur soon after they start dating, after they get engaged, or more commonly, after they get married and the honeymoon glow wears off. It happens. We fall in and we fall out of making dating a priority. One of the best pieces of advice I’ve heard is this: “No matter how long you’ve been together, you still have to date your spouse.” This tip is incredibly true. Unfortunately, we often accept the inevitable dating rut as “the norm.” My husband and I have gone through intentional seasons of trying to go on more dinner dates together, but after awhile, even going to dinner and a movie was boring. Our solution? We came up with creative, unique, and even some FREE dates to go on in the fall to keep our dating life fresh. There are so many ways to rekindle the romance in the fall! It’s literally one of the most beautiful times of the year. Fall is all about being cozy, crunching leaves, anticipating the holidays, football, chili, and enjoying the great outdoors. Fall weather is fabulous with cooler air and multicolored scenery. So, in order to capitalize on what Mother Nature has already ushered in, we came up with some free ideas to try out this fall.
bicycle built for two!
Go on a bike ride together. Something about being on bicycles can feel strangely child-like. Also, if you aren’t the typical exercising type, this is a good way to get a little bit of physical activity in without sweating buckets. Think of areas you could ride — your neighborhood, downtown, the local greenway, a park, or even just around town if you live in an urban environment.
hit the trails!
This is another one that is great exercise but also creates a sometimes rare opportunity to just chat. Seriously — do you ever just chat with your spouse or longtime boyfriend anymore? Sometimes in the busyness of life we forget to pursue our spouse mentally. Talking about your week, catching up on life together, and simply relaxing in nature
can be quite restorative. This is also a great time to bring your four-legged family members along. Pack some dog treats and maybe grab a hot coffee before you hit the trail.
community events Research online and in the paper to find upcoming outdoor concerts, festivals, or street fairs. Depending on your city, these events might be common and from my experience, are often cheap or even free. These community events can provide great opportunities to hear and see local talent, become acquainted with artists, or blend into a crowd for an afternoon.
junk hunt Spend an afternoon exploring an antique mall or thrift fall 2013
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store. My husband and I like to call this “treasure hunting”…maybe he is looking for a quirky blazer or maybe you are looking for a statement piece for the center of your coffee table. Whatever it is, digging through piles of junk can be really fun. Also, if you want to make it a little more fun, give each other a ten dollar spending limit. Walk around and explore everything together, then split up for ten minutes to find your own thrifty gem. Meet back up to show each other what you found. You can even make it a competition to see who can find the best token. For an added twist, choose to spend your ten dollars on each other.
quilt
+ outside + coffee = fun
Grab a blanket, a hot drink, and find an open space somewhere to loaf around, talk, and look at the stars. I would suggest ditching the cell phones and digital tablets for this one. Technology can be rather invasive when attempting to unwind and reconnect. Challenge yourself to a tech-free-hang-out session outside with your boo.
date night in Clean the house, do the laundry, put away the dishes, and light some
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candles. Put your hubs to work building a fire in the fire place or fire pit. Call and order delivery, bust open a bag of marshmallows, and both of you, change into pajamas. Enjoying the comforts of being at home can sometimes be just what you need to feel revitalized as a pair.
apple pickin’ Get to Google-ing to find local farms that have “pick-your-own” options and go apple picking. It's a fun activity to do together and you get to take home the apples you picked. When you get home, carry on the crispy autumn goodness and bake an apple pie together. Heck, go crazy, you could even invite friends over and make caramel apples.
corn maze craze Navigate your way through a corn maze. If they freak you out, go during daylight when they are more family-friendly. If you enjoy getting scared out of your mind by some youth minister dressed as a scarecrow chasing you with a fake chain saw, then go at night! (Can you tell I’m more of the family-friendly-day-light crowd?) Going at night is certainly a great excuse to hang on tight to one another!
No matter how long you’ve been together, you still have to date your spouse. pumpkin patch
picnic on the peaks
Go to a pumpkin patch and pick out pumpkins. Find the one that looks most like your significant other. Then spend the evening carving them together. If you are feeling super domestic, roast the pumpkin seeds for a little snack to have on one of those walking trail dates. Channel Martha Stewart or Pioneer Woman and consult Pinterest to find all sorts of recipes you can make with your pumpkin guts.
Pack a picnic and head for the mountains. You can't beat the gorgeous scenery and the colors of the leaves during fall. Bring cards, board games, a frisbee, and have some fun playing together after you eat! This is also a good one for your outdoorsy types. If you own a camp stove, pack your groceries and cook your meal together while you’re hanging out.
old school drive in
sadie hawkins date
Fill your oversized purse with some candy and drinks and go to a drivein movie. It's a nice change of pace from the typical movie theater. Remember, most drive-ins are a good ways out of town so factor in time for travel.
This is exactly what it sounds like. Ladies, ask your man on a date. Plan it all. Plan his clothes, your clothes, the food, and mostly the activities. Figure out the logistics yourself, leave him out of it! Create some mystery and have him meet you somewhere. Sometimes our men need a little pampering and pursuing as well.
daycation Take a day trip to a nearby city. Spend the day walking around enjoying the scenery and the local events they have going on. Then find a Mom and Pop type restaurant to have lunch or dinner. If it's a pretty day, find a restaurant with outdoor seating so that you can enjoy the day even more.
These dates are perfect for me and my husband, but every couple is different. Tweak some of these dates to fit your style — no relationship is alike so find what activities that suite you and your spouse. Let the dating begin...again!
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For the Home
Out of Necessity by
Ruth Dennison
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muddling through
S
ome years ago, when the housing market tanked, our sole source of income evaporated. My husband owned a civil engineering firm, and he lost his business. Thus began our two and a half years of unemployment. I’m so thankful that I did not know then how long our ordeal would last! Even more importantly, I am thankful that we had the Lord to sustain us during those tough years. We were in the middle of our two and a half year journey, muddling through somehow day by day, when my friend, Lisa, introduced me to the wonders of couponing. At that time, I knew we had to do something differently than what we had been. I was struggling to put anything on the table at all, much less good and healthy snacks for four growing kids (two of them teenagers). I was trying to purchase all of our food plus personal items on just $300 per month, but it wasn’t working.
the “big” find I approached couponing with a lot of skepticism. I doubted that I could feed my family for less money and still keep us well stocked with toothpaste, deodorant, and shampoos by shopping at Publix and Kroger verses purchasing off-brand items at Walmart. I remember saying, “Publix? But they carry your groceries out for you! There’s no way I can afford to shop there!” Yet within a few short weeks, my family quickly experienced the benefits of couponing, and I enjoyed the luxury of having my groceries carried to my car while I saved money. I won’t ever forget that first “ big” find. It was so exciting that even to this day I remember the thrill I got from it. I was given some extra Gillette Body Wash coupons, so I had a total of eight two dollar-off coupons. The following week, Target put the Gillette Body Washes on sale for two dollars. So, I quickly made a run to Target and came home with eight FREE bottles of body washes! That excitement pushed me on to see what else I could score for free. As a result, couponing became my hobby.
shopping tips and tricks When I sit down with someone who is couponing for the very first time, there are some basic tips that I tell them. First, you have to have a good stockpile of coupons, so order the Sunday newspaper. In fact, order one newspaper per person in your home. The Sunday paper is your best source of coupons. I have people tell me all the time, “There aren’t any good food coupons in the paper because I only purchase fresh produce.” I then ask them, “Do you use shampoo, deodorant, body washes, toothpaste, toothbrushes, laundry detergent, cleaners, and other household items? If so, then you can at least stock up on those items for cheap and even free thereby allowing more grocery money for fruits, vegetables, and other items.” Your second-best source of coupons are printable coupons online. There are many sites that provide coupons for you to print for items that you like and use. You can go to www.shoppingtipsandtricks.com to find links to many of these sites. The trick with printable coupons is to only print coupons that you need, love, and use because you don’t want to waste the ink and paper for coupons that you have to throw away when they expire. Finally, I encourage others to write to manufacturers requesting coupons for
their favorite items. I have done this with much success. Sometimes they will send me coupons and sometimes they won’t, but it’s always worth a try. Some manufacturers will also send you free samples.
clipping for a living or not If you don’t want to clip coupons, there are many options for loading coupons onto your shopper’s cards or smart phone. On Kroger’s website, you can download digital coupons onto your shopper’s card. On the Publix site, you can download coupons onto your smart phone. There are other sites like Cellfire, Ibotta, and Savingstar where you can also download coupons onto shopper cards or smart phones. So, if you don’t have the time to clip coupons, then digital coupons are definitely the way to go. One of the most important things that a new couponer should learn is to purchase items when they are on sale with a manufacturer and/ or store coupon to maximize your savings. For example, if Publix puts Pace Salsa on sale BOGO (Buy One Get One Free) and you have four coupons, go ahead and stock-up on eight bottles of salsa, especially if your family uses as much salsa as my family does! Many grocery stores, especially in the south, put items on sale on a six to eight week cycle. When your favorite items go on sale, then you want to purchase enough of those items to last you for eight weeks, which is when they will go on sale again. This is the true definition of stockpiling: purchasing enough stock while on sale with a coupon in order to last you until the next sale. Remember, even if you do minimal couponing and save $25 a week, that equals to $100 per month or $1,200 per year! Make small, attainable goals when you are starting so that you can see and achieve them and feel the accomplishment of doing so. Build on that, and you will be well on your way to being an extreme couponer.
life lessons Though our family is now one and a half years past our unemployment journey, we still practice frugal living in everything we do. It is now a way of life for us. We raise our own vegetables and are trying our hand at growing grapes, blueberries, and strawberries. The life lessons my children learned from the tough times are priceless. They learned the value of a dollar and what it takes to earn it, as well as what is really important and necessary for living. My husband reminded us often during those years when we couldn’t have or do what others do that those are just “things.” God, family, and relationships are what matters most.
visit her blog at www.shoppingtipsandtricks.com
Ruth Dennison is a child of God, wife, mother and couponer extraordinaire. Her passion is helping families make ends meet during these tough economic times. She is busy homeschooling her two youngest adopted children, running her blog, teaching couponing classes, and being involved in her local church.
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materials:
Indoor Cinnamon Stick Wreath
Foam wreath cut in half (may also use a flat, wooden wreath) 80 to 120 6-inch cinnamon sticks (these can be found at Hobby Lobby) Glue gun Glue sticks Ribbon
directions: 1. Hot glue the thickest cinnamon sticks onto the flat side of the wreath all the way around. Make sure that the wreath base does not show through. 2. Fill in any gaps you spot with thinner cinnamon sticks. Continue to layer your cinnamon sticks on top of each other until you have achieved what you consider the finished look. 3. To give the wreath something to hang from and to add a splash of color, loop ribbon through the wreath and tie in a bow at the top. Note: This could be hung anywhere in the home, but my favorite two places are the kitchen or the foyer of your home in order for your guests to get a fresh aroma of fall.
Bringing Fall to your Front Door by
Amy Knight
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ne of the best parts of fall are the colors: red, orange, green, brown, and yellow. What better way is there to welcome this colorful season than by displaying it on your front door for you and your guests to enjoy? There are so many ways to bring nature into our home, so I have picked some of my favorites to share with you. Not only are there several fall wreath ideas, but I also added some tips on saving time and money in making them. Happy Autumn!
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Rake Wreath materials: Rake (can be used or inexpensive) Real or fake florals Decorative ribbon or twine Floral or craft wire Wire cutters or heavy duty scissors
directions: 1. Remove the rake head from the handle. Lay the rake head on your work surface with the tines curling up. Cut a 12-inch length of wire using wire cutters or heavy duty scissors. Use the wire to make a wreath hanger by forming the wire into a "U" shape. Wrap the ends around the nearest tines and twist to secure. 2. Turn your rake head over so that the hanger is on the back and the tines are facing down. Arrange the florals so that they will lay flat and fit within the surface of your rake head. To secure the floral additions either insert the stems into the handle bracket or secure with floral wire. Shorten the stems of the florals using wire cutters to align with the end of the bracket. 3. Wrap the handle bracket several times with twine or ribbon and make a bow. Note: You can re-use the rake all year-round and just change the florals to fit the season.
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Pine Cone Cluster materials: 8 pine cones 8 pieces of wide ribbon in varying lengths 20” to 30” long (I like gingham best) 8 pieces of thin ribbon long enough to tie into small bows (a solid color to coordinate with the wide ribbon) Glue gun Glue sticks
directions: 1. Glue the end of the wide ribbon to the top of each pinecone. 2. Tie thin ribbons into small bows. Conceal the exposed end of the wide ribbon with a small bow glued to the top of the pine cone. 3. Bring all the pine cones together in a bunch and tie the ribbons together in a knot at the top. Tie a big bow at the top to make the wreath hanger. Note: This isn’t your typical wreath; it is unique and lovely!
Money savers and handy tips
1. When buying a foam wreath, slice the foam
in half. You will have two round foam wreaths. The wreath will lay better against the door. Now, you have two wreaths for the price of one!
2.
Go to the plumbing department at Home Depot or Lowe’s and grab a six foot long piece of foam tubing for $0.97. Snip the length you want and duct tape the ends together in a circle.
3. If a big metal wreath hanger is not
attractive to you or you don’t want to put holes in your door to hang the wreath, buy large Command adhesive wall hooks ($3.50) that can easily be removed without damaging your door.
4.
You can buy the Wreath Pro Adjustable Wreath Hanger that allows you to change ribbons with the season at www.wreathpro.com for $20.
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by
Abby Ricks
A
s someone in my twenties, it had never occurred to me to make such a bold request as to pray for my dream home while looking to purchase my first house. I mean, who gets their dream house that young? It especially never occurred to me that I would come across something that far surpassed my wildest dreams and actually fell within my price range. I longed for somewhere I could find rest, solace,
my grandparents’ farm in Louisiana. As my eyes traveled quickly over each and every curve and whimsical detail of this sweet house, I felt immediately romanced and pursued. I was awestruck as I stepped out of my car and started taking in all the love notes — I’m referring to things that shout “I see you” and “I know you better than you know yourself.” Examples of such things were innumerable so much so that even I got
and comfort; a haven where I could sit and soak in God’s provision in my life — a provision I had struggled to accept yet yearned to believe.
it. God did a number on me with this one. Lavish is the word that comes to mind when I think of this gift.
The gravel driveway wound around to the back of the house. The crackle of tiny rocks as my car eased up the driveway immediately connected me to fond memories of driving along the gravel road to
The deepest desire of my heart — to really be seen and known — was met a hundred times over as I took in each detail of the home. Over the past few years I had struggled to be seen by my own husband. I was fall 2013
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“This cottage stood as a symbol of God’s compassion and steadfast love.”
heartbroken when it became clear that he had little interest in me. Sitting on a figurative pile of rubble from the devastation of an ended marriage, I was overwhelmed with feelings of rejection and inadequacy. I brought my shattered dreams and broken heart before God and longed for healing and renewed hope for my future. As I stared at this cottage nestled on an acre of beautiful land, there was undeniable proof that someone saw me! Someone was pursuing me. This someone was not just anyone, but the Creator of the Universe. God had not left me during my deepest moments of pain and He would not leave me. This cottage stood as a symbol of God’s compassion and steadfast love. It was a reminder that I could look to the future with hope as I entrusted it to Him. This charming historic home sits humbly on an acre of lush Alabama land and has been completely upgraded and renovated. It has high ceilings, original wood floors, a nostalgic fireplace, proud windows to let in plenty of natural light, a charming claw foot tub, and the most amazing open kitchen. The yard has one of the largest hydrangea bushes I’ve ever seen, and mature trees as old
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as the home itself. You know, the types of trees you can’t even wrap your arms around? To top it all off, there’s a charming wooden swing installed on the deep front porch. Why God chose to bless me with a gift I do not deserve, I cannot say. I will forever see this home as a tangible reminder of His lavish grace. With so much sentiment attached to this gift, it seemed only natural that I should name this beautiful dwelling space. If you’d be so kind as to humor me, we will refer to it as Grace Haven from here on out. Welcome, sweet friend! I’ve always known I would want my home to be a haven not only for me, but for all who set foot in it. A place to relax, feel safe, extend mercy, sympathize, nourish, and ultimately love my friends and family. Add some creativity and attention to detail and a home can tell a unique story about those who inhabit it. Which currently consists of me and my five furry pets! Even greater, our homes can be a tool for communicating God’s love to our guests. Here is a list of simple touches that I’m incorporating little by little:
Furniture meant for living. Sturdy antiques and
distressed yard sale treasures invite others to use it without fear of leaving behind fingerprints or scratches. My hand-me-down sofa and loveseat don’t match, but now look great with slipcovers that can be tossed in the wash after an accidental wine spill or a pair of overzealous puppies with muddy paws.
Bring outside inside.
In the fall, add pine cones to apothecary jars and display branches in large clear vases. The addition of houseplants, a neatly kept terrarium or a flourishing windowsill herb garden, are a nice touch to creating the inviting space I desire. Also, don’t forget burnt orange and garnet mums to sprinkle on the front steps.
Nostalgic comforts. Nestle textured pillows, mix matched quilts, and crocheted blankets onto chairs and sofas. No spot in the house is out of reach to a cozy throw! Old books from thrift stores, children’s books from my past, and wildly colorful coffee table books invite guests to dive in and momentarily get lost in the pages.
Sensory Overload. Fall presents some ideal weather to open
up the windows and let in fresh air. Bake a few tablespoons of vanilla in the oven on its lowest setting or cook something aromatic to share. Fall is the perfect time of year to bring out the crock pot for some mulled apple cider, slow roast a pot of chili, cook some fresh pumpkin bread, or bake snicker doodle cookies to share. Let what is created in your home, pour out. fall 2013
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by
Alicia Marks
a new school year
excitement
alendars tell us that the beginning of the year is January first, but every mother knows that the true beginning of each New Year is back-to-school time. I love the beginning of a new school year, don’t you? As a child, I was mesmerized by fresh notebooks and school supplies each fall. And to this day, nothing has changed. Now I homeschool my own children and I still can’t wait to get out all of the new books that each child will be learning from over the next year. I even get giddy filling out my weekly planner. For those of us who homeschool, we should remember to prepare our hearts as well. Here are a few ways to make sure you are emotionally and spiritually prepared for a the new year ahead:
After you are sure that you have been called to the ministry of homeschooling, get excited! Realistically, there will be days when you feel like pulling your hair out, but homeschooling will also provide your family with a multitude of wonderful experiences that will be both memorable and fun. Get ready to have a great year.
C
motives Check your motives. Nowadays it seems like everyone is homeschooling, doesn’t it? Homeschooling is a type of ministry that many, but not all, people are called to. As moms, we often feel pressured to be like other mothers. If we see other mothers who are called to homeschool doing a great job, we can sometimes feel guilty for not doing it ourselves, especially as we hear horror stories coming out of public schools. Deciding to homeschool your children is a big job and a huge sacrifice. It will be a nightmare for your entire family if you try to do it in your own strength and apart from the empowering work of Holy Spirit. Before you decide anything, be sure that you and your spouse have thoroughly prayed about it and that you both feel assured that God is leading you to commit to this endeavor.
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no fear Fear not; you can do this. Many mothers have told me that they certainly feel led to homeschool their children but are afraid because they’re unsure whether or not they are capable of doing something as monumental as educating their children. This reminds me of the story of Gideon in the Old Testament. When the Angel of the Lord suddenly appeared to Gideon and told him that God wanted him to save the Israelites from their oppressors, the Midianites, Gideon was sure that there must have been a mistake. He cataloged all of the reasons why he couldn’t do this particular job. The angel with God’s full authority called out to Gideon with the words, “Oh, mighty warrior, go in the strength you have and save Israel out of Midian’s hand; am I not sending you?” (Judges 6:14). God was telling Gideon that He had already given him all of the resources that he would need in order to accomplish this task. Guess what? He has done that for each of us as well. If God has called you to the task of homeschooling, then to God you are already a “mighty homeschool mom.” Don’t be afraid, you can do this! (And you might want to recite that to yourself in the mirror each morning.)
teach the truth
doing what you know is right Do what God has told you to do and don’t sweat the rest. I will tell you that nothing has caused others, including random strangers at the grocery store, to offer their opinions more freely than my decision to homeschool. People often tell me that they would never subject their kids to homeschooling because those kids are always “weird.” I find this hilarious! I used to be a public school teacher and my husband is a professor at a public university. Trust me when I tell you that public education does not spare you or your child from “weirdness.” Besides, what’s wrong with being different? He made us all different for a purpose, so you just have to laugh at others’ critical comments and remember that you are doing what God has called you to do. Show interest in how God views your choices rather than concerning yourself with other people’s opinions of those choices.
care for yourself Last but definitely not least, do not push aside your own spiritual health. God equips us to do every good thing that He has called us to do (Hebrews 13:12). He will give us the daily strength, patience, and wisdom that we need; but, we must stay close to Him through prayer, Bible study, and relationships with other Christ followers. So mighty homeschool mom, go in the strength that you have been given and have a fantastic school year. Has not God Almighty, the Creator of the Universe, sent you?
we “ Aseducate our children, we are, in reality
preparing them to thrive in and
contribute
spiritually
to the rest of the world.
“
Teach your child what is truly important. One of the biggest blessings of homeschooling is the added opportunity to intertwine the Word of God with the seams of our children’s hearts (Psalm 119:11). There is nothing in this world that is more important. As we educate our children, we are, in reality, preparing them to thrive in and contribute spiritually to the rest of the world. The best possible way to do this is to constantly nourish their hearts with scripture and bathe them in prayer. Don’t become so focused on picking out curriculums, keeping schedules, and/ or running the kids around to all of their extra-curricular activities that you forget what you’re actual purpose in homeschooling is.
Alicia Marks is the author of the woman’s Bible study Elijah: Bold Obedience and a Still Small Voice (Lulu. com). Alicia seeks to help others understand and love the Word of God through the expository teaching of the Bible. She and her husband, Dr. Nathan Slegers, are active members of their church and the parents of four young children. Alicia can be reached at comethirstyministry@gmail.com.
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FEATURE
Broken but not
Defeated story shared by
“Victoria Rose”* Knight
photos by Joshua
I
*“Victoria” ’s real name has been withheld to ensure her and her family's safety.
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had just graduated from high school and was looking forward to starting my adult life. I had strong Christian values and though I was young, I knew what I wanted. I had a great relationship with my parents. They never had to worry about me because I had always made good decisions for myself. I was more than ready to start writing the next chapter of my life and head off to college. An education in Christian counseling was set on my heart with the ultimate desire to help hurting people. I also dreamed of becoming a wife and mother and knew that I would raise my kids in a loving home where my husband and I would teach them about God just like my parents did with me.
different reality I had never heard the words “domestic violence” spoken before. It was not a prevalent message or a topic that had much awareness when I was young. I also never knew a man who was abusive or seen a woman who had been beaten. So I didn’t know what to watch out for or what the warning signs were. No one I knew had ever heard about it or seen it. I didn’t know it was something we had to run away or hide from. I would have told someone, but I didn’t know how to even explain it. I would have stopped it, but before I could, things would improve for a moment, and I would think he could change. I would have asked someone for help, but I was too humiliated. I should have pulled my sleeves up and shown the bruises after the first time he grabbed my arm in anger, but I had convinced myself that it was my fault because I didn’t have dinner ready on time. I should have pulled up my pant leg up to show the deep cuts and bruises from when he threw me off the front porch, but I was too ashamed. I was desperate for someone to save me the night he slammed me against the wall and put his hand around my throat so tightly that I gasped for a breath, but I couldn’t speak. Jake’s web of deception, manipulation, and intimidation pulled me in so quickly that I didn’t even know what was happening to me. All of a sudden my life became dramatically transformed and consumed by his chaos. I would sometimes stand bewildered at how I went from being a strong, independent young Christian woman with big dreams to someone I didn’t even recognize. What happened to me? How did that one date so many years ago turn into twenty years of abuse and violence in a marriage that I was alone in? He said he wanted to be a Christian and needed a sweet girl like me to help him be a better person. I knew my mom had led my dad to Christ soon after they were married, and I thought it plausible that I could do the same for him. Even though he scared me every now and then with his explosive anger, he always apologized and brought me flowers the next day and assured me that he would never hurt me again me. He promised me the world, so I jumped in with the young eyes of a woman wanting to be loved and dreaming of her future-to-be. As soon as we were married, his anger and hostility became more frequent — a complete 180 degree turn that left my head spinning and my heart crushed. He denied ever wanting God in his life. In fact, he claimed that the traits he had once admired in me now disgusted him. He became violent and his moods were extreme. Our conversations were confusing and he always said that I was the one misunderstanding. His namecalling being so frequent, my everyday labels like “stupid” and “worthless” simply became normal and a part of my identity deeply buried in the wounds he created in my heart.
suffering quietly We moved often and became more and more geographically isolated from family. He preferred that I stayed home to raise our son, and he whipped me into submission declaring me too stupid to do anything else. He controlled the money and limited the time I spent talking to my parents or anyone else. He objected to me having friends over and wanted me available for him at all times. I was never to complain about being ill and whether I was or not, I had every day duties that, fall 2013
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if not completed, would result in disaster. Many times I wanted nothing more than to leave him, but knew that if I ever did I might never see my son again. Jake always threatened to find me and steal our son and move to another country where I couldn’t find them. When I mustered up enough courage to ask a pastor what I should do, he told me that I needed to stay with my husband and just pray harder. Jake wasn’t interested in getting help because according to him, it was always my fault. The violence escalated. I was five months pregnant when Jake came home early from work and saw the mess from putting up the Christmas decorations hadn’t been cleaned. He was so furious at me that when he threw me on the floor, he kicked me in the belly like I was discarded trash. Hours later, I miscarried. When he brought me home, he smiled at me and said that he had me all to himself again. I suffered quietly for years over that day. On December 4th, I always remember. On another occasion, I asked him to quit driving so fast. His response was to reach across me, open the car door and begin to push me out of our moving car. He justified his actions by stating that it was the only way to get my attention since I was being so bossy.
reality: a wakeup call As years passed, I reflected on how life had become so exhausting and complicated. I had grown weary of always living in fear and hiding my wounds, physically and emotionally. I was growing more disgusted with what our lives had been reduced to. I was depressed, fatigued, and always sick. Jake had always told me that I was a leech and could never stand on my own two feet, but I was certain that God was still there and could hear my prayers. I was so grateful that He had kept me alive this long, and I knew that nothing I went through was in vain. I finally got to the point where I knew I had to make a change. Because I had mastered the art of coping with my dysfunctional environment, the uncertainty of starting over was scary, but I was desperate to do whatever I had to do. Being a single mother and never having worked outside the home made me fearful, but I was ready to follow God’s lead. Regardless of the unknown, I knew that my current situation would eventually kill me. I didn’t want to ruin any more of my life trying to rescue Jake from his demons. I was also concerned about my eleven year old son. I had guarded him from the abuse, but he was now at the age where he hated his father for being so mean to me. And because he was beginning to adopt his father’s attitude of disrespect towards women, I knew it was time to remove him from the wrong atmosphere. I had homeschooled our son through seventh grade and during those years, I poured my heart and soul into his life, reminding him of how much God loved him and how he could always count on me to be there for him. I tried everything to counteract the abuse that he was exposed to, but sadly I also knew that a father has a powerful influence on a son.
the escape plan
34
After months of praying, planning, and surrendering to God, He heard my cry. He moved our family to another community closer to family and friends. I began taking my son to church on a regular basis, in spite shattered
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of the relentless abuse. He and I developed some very special friends there and were able to share our plight with them. Together, along with the pastor, we created a carefully thought out escape plan. We had just moved into our newly built home and when I thought the time was right, my son and I fled.
If you or someone you know is in a domestic violence situation, you can find resources, advice, and help by going online to www.helpguide.org or by calling 1-800-799-7233 (SAFE). You can get help. It is not too late. Before the end of that night, Jake had called around town looking for us, frantically demanding that we return. It was the first time I didn’t rescue him from his suicidal threats. Instead, the police were notified. It was reported that Jake was at a standoff with two loaded pistols while making phone calls to me. He left six messages on my voice recorder threatening to kill me. The last was him accusing me of his suicide (that never happened). He said he wanted me to rot in hell with his blood on my hands. Meanwhile, a SWAT team engulfed the property, and hours later he was in custody. Jake was evaluated and released. To my dismay, I was told he had been released to his girlfriend of 20 years. The betrayal was more than I could bear. Twenty years of my life was ruined while he loved another woman.
years restored Some years have passed since that day, and I have had to ask for help along my journey. I’ve learned that with God, my pain was not in vain. The years I thought I lost are being restored. The moments in each day are much more special than ever before, and I take nothing for granted. I’ve learned to reach out to family and friends when I’m lonely. I’ve found some healing while helping others who are victims of abuse. I’m discovering how to love myself and accept the things I cannot change. I’ve had to realize that in order to be truly free, I need to forgive Jake. I now know that no one has the right to define my worth but our Maker, and that He has a plan and purpose for all who seek Him. Financially, I’ve started at the bottom, yet I have seen God provide in ways far above what I can amass in earthly wealth. Through my healing, I’ve learned not to let anyone or anything get between God and me. I am reminded daily of His unconditional love and acceptance of me and know that He wants to bless me. So, I’m learning to not hold onto the pain of the past but instead release my grip so that I can accept His blessings each day. I have chosen to never again live in secrecy and darkness again. I have found peace in where I am today. fall 2013
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The He[art] of Cooking
A Topper of a Meal By Stacey Roy
Veggie Casserole with Biscuit Topper gluten free, dairy-lactose-casein free, soy free, peanut free prep time: 20 minutes cook time: 25 minutes serves: up to 8
ingredients: 1 small onion, chopped 2 cloves garlic, minced 1 pound ground beef or mild Italian sausage 1 cup grated zucchini ½ cup shredded carrot ½ cup black bean and corn salsa 1 (14.5 oz.) can diced fire-roasted tomatoes 1 cup frozen whole kernel corn Salt and pepper to taste topping ingredients: 2 cups gluten-free baking mix (Baker’s Corner GF Baking Mix, King Arthur Flour Multi purpose Flour, or Hodgson Mill GF Multi-purpose Baking Mix) 1 tablespoon baking powder 2 teaspoons white sugar ½ teaspoon cream of tartar ½ teaspoon salt 1 teaspoon garlic powder ½ cup Earth Balance Buttery Spread- Soy Free or Lou Ana All Natural Pure Coconut Oil ½ cup Daiya mozzarella style shreds ½ cup Daiya cheddar style shreds 1 cup rice milk
I discovered this recipe to be a great way to get my daughter to eat more vegetables without even knowing it. It also gives her the taste of warm bread with a biscuit-like topping while still being gluten-free. When you have a child with a restricted diet due to food allergies, it’s a challenge to find foods that are not only safe, but actually taste good! This makes plenty for a family of two or three with leftovers or one meal for a group of friends. directions
Preheat oven to 375°F (190°C). Lightly grease a 9x13 inch baking dish with Winona Pure 100% canola spray or Earth Balance Buttery SpreadSoy Free. In a large skillet over medium heat, sauté onion and garlic, then brown the meat. Drain and return to skillet. Add zucchini and carrot. Cook and stir until the vegetables are tender. Mix in the salsa, fire-roasted tomatoes, and corn. Season with salt and pepper to taste. Transfer to the prepared baking dish. In a medium bowl, mix the flour, baking powder, sugar, cream of tartar, salt, and garlic powder. Cut in the buttery spread or coconut oil until the mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Stir in the cheddar and mozzarella shreds and rice milk. Add more rice milk if the mixture is too dry. Spread over the meat and vegetable mixture in the baking dish, evening with the back of a spatula. Bake uncovered in the preheated oven 25 minutes or until the topping is golden brown and a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. Cover the last ten minutes of cooking if the topping browns quickly.
directions:
Shred the Carrots 36
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Grate the Zucchini
Stacey was adopted from South Korea and grew up in Louisville, Kentucky. She graduated early with a B.S. from Harding University to marry her high school sweetheart before earning her M.S.Ed. in Early Childhood, Speech Language Pathology and Audiology and Special Education, from Old Dominion University. She holds national certification (ASHA) and state licensure (ABESPA) for Speech-Language Pathology. She and her husband have lived in the Huntsville/Madison area since 2005. Presently, she works in the Madison City school district; however, her first and favorite job is wife to her best friend and mother to two beautiful girls. Her passions are Christ, cooking, and coffee. Bio photo courtesy of www.mphotography.us.
A Bowlful of Comfort By Rachael Jackson
Perfect Tater Soup gluten free prep time: 40 minutes cook time: 30 minutes ingredients:
Sweet potatoes (3 large) – peeled and diced small Bakers potatoes (4 large) – peeled and diced small Celery (1 entire stalk) – washed and diced small Carrots (4 large) – peeled and diced small Leeks (1 entire stalk) – washed well and diced small Red onion (1 whole) – diced small Green onions (2 stalks) – chopped small 1 stick of butter 2 packages of cream cheese 4 cups of shredded pepper jack cheese Chicken broth (1 large container) Water Chopped green chills (optional – if you like spicy)
This is a fantastic recipe (that I actually made up) for a delicious tummy warming meal. The bonus is that it is naturally gluten-free while not tasting like it at all! I made this for my husband when we were dating, and I’m pretty sure it’s what made him want to marry me. Too bad it’s one of the few things I can actually cook. When I make this, I make it in large quantities. I usually double this recipe and cook it in several pots. It makes a perfect meal for small group gatherings or to take to families who need a meal. It freezes well and is just as delicious on the second go-round. directions:
Melt the butter in the bottom of your very large kettle over medium heat. (I like to use a cast iron pot.) Add the leeks, onions, green onions, celery, and carrots — let them sauté for about 15 minutes, stirring every few minutes. Add the finely diced sweet potatoes and bakers potatoes. Cover with the chicken broth and let simmer until the sweet potatoes are tender. (Use the water to cover the vegetables if you run out of broth.) After the potatoes are soft, pour the chicken broth moisture out into a big bowl in your kitchen sink. (You will want to reuse this broth, so DON’T THROW IT AWAY.) Take your softened cream cheese and pepper jack cheese and stir in to the vegetables. It should melt and become very creamy. It’s also okay if the potatoes and vegetables start to mash up a bit. I like them a little mashed. After it’s all stirred in, re-add the chicken broth mixture until it reaches a creamy thick soup consistency. YOU WILL NOT ADD ALL OF THE LIQUID BACK IN. If you do, then it will become very thin soup and it tastes best when it’s thick and chunky.
Dice the vegetables
Stir in Cheeses
Let it simmer until the soup is hot again and then it will be ready to eat. I LOVE to eat this with a piece of sour dough toast. It also works well in a bread bowl or just on its own. Enjoy! fall 2013
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The Spice of Life.. In a Frap By Diane Floate
diane’s pumpkin (a little bit of cinnamon) spice frap
1 - 4 ounce Starbucks Frappuccino Mocha or Mocha Light Drink (this can found in most grocery stores) 1 tablespoon of Pumpkin Spice Syrup (I found mine at Target) 1 teaspoons of Cinnamon Sugar (not ground cinnamon) A handful or two ice (this amount can vary depending upon how frozen
To say I have fallen in love with Frappuccino’s (fraps) is an understatement! My all-time favorite frap is none other than a pumpkin spice version. I have to let you in on a little secret – not so secret if you are my family or a close friend – I am a very, very picky eater. Regardless of food or beverage, if I don’t like the way it looks, I am not going to touch it with a ten foot pole. Yet, two fall seasons ago, I strolled into one of the coffee chains in town with a friend for a catch-up chat. When I walked up to the counter, I guess I had this zap of courage that lessened my inhibitions for beverages because I looked up and my eyes zoned in on this particular drink – Pumpkin Spice Frappuccino. Never before have I been tempted to eat anything pumpkin or pumpkin-f lavored. During all the past holidays when people are going goo-goo-gah-gah over pumpkin pie or pumpkin bread, I avoided those foods like the plague. Yet, that particular fall day, I found myself ordering a pumpkin-f lavored drink. I thought, “Well, the worst that could happen is I take a sip and hate it – tossing it and my five bucks in the trash; the best that could happen is that I could love it.” So, upon receiving my “adventure in a cup” from the counter, I hesitantly took a sip and…oh my, did I ever love it!! It instantly became my all-time favorite drink to order when visiting this coffee shop. A few months ago, I had a crazy idea…why not try and recreate the Pumpkin Spice frap myself? To be honest with you, the majority of the time I cook I must have a pre-written recipe;therefore, trying to create my own recipe was a zany and absolutely preposterous idea. Who was I to try and recreate this all-time favorite drink of mine – and others? I mean, seriously, what was I thinking? There is not much I fear these days, so despite the voices of doubt, I forged ahead and allowed my creative juices f low. Here, you will find the recipe that I came up with on my own, believe it or not. To reassure you, I had a very dear and courageous friend try my concoction that I methodically “brewed” over. The results: she loved it! I hope you do, too.
a person likes his/her drink) Use a blender (I select the ice crusher button on my blender and then I select puree button) Pour into glass leaving enough space at top for whip cream I make a thin layer of caramel syrup before adding whip cream Top with whip cream (optional) Drizzle a little caramel or butterscotch on top Sprinkle with ground nutmeg or pumpkin spice
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Ingredients
1-4 oz Starbucks Frappuccino
Crsush. Puree.
Health & Beauty
by
Samantha Lane
I remember it now like it was yesterday, but a year has come and gone. I was the new girl in a new job. Although I was young, my career had already experienced quite an evolution: from entry level work at a fastgrowing, extremely secular video production company to a key cog in a well-established conservative Christian college. During that journey I had grown tremendously — personally, professionally, and spiritually; however, my first day at Altar’d State, a Christian owned clothing chain exploding onto the fashion scene, left me feeling inadequate in one very relevant area.
fashion mishap All around me, men and women were sauntering by in the most fashion-forward and fun-loving ensembles I had seen in a while. Everyone looked put-together and perfect. When I began working on an assignment that involved our look book, I was even more horrified to discover that all of the models were store associates and home office employees! Instantly, I felt old, ugly, and so ill-dressed that I didn’t want to leave my cubicle. During my wonderful career transformation had my sense of style forgotten to follow along with it?
photo by
Courtney DeLaura
I had always considered myself to be fashionable, but now I began each morning worrying about what I was going to wear to work. How on earth was I going to write anything believable about fashion if I looked like someone’s 70-year-old crazy aunt?! And it didn’t stop at my clothing; I picked apart everything about my appearance and committed to fixing my (self-assessed) boring style. As the weeks went on, I continued to shop on my lunch breaks and slowly became busier and busier with my daily tasks. Luckily, with each day I became more engrossed in presenting great clothing to impressionable young women and less concerned with the impressions I was making on co-workers; who, by the way, already accepted me as I was.
fashion with a higher purpose Arguably the best distraction from my personal “Mission: Makeover” was all the knowledge I was learning about the unique brands that I never knew existed. There were scarves that helped create sustainable business for women in Africa, shoes that offered a pair to a child with every purchase, t-shirts that donated money to tsunami victims, and bags that provided food to school children for a year. These were reasons to buy clothes! I began to see things in perspective. Why was I so concerned with how I dressed anyway? Was it really important to me what my shoes looked like when there were children who would be happy to have any pair of shoes? After some reflection on the matter, I decided that answer was no… and yes. fall 2013
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in the grand scheme of things As humans, we can find ourselves to be extremely vulnerable at times. If we let the pressures of the world weigh on us, we may begin questioning anything and everything about who we are. It is then that we need to stop and remember what is important. What are we really here to do? It was during this necessary reflection that I reminded myself that God loves me no matter what I am wearing. He has seen me though every phase of my fashion lifecycle and not one mistake or magnificent outfit has changed how I am in His eyes. Therefore, it should not be such a large matter in mine.
dressing for you However, it is still very important for us, especially women, to feel confident in who we are. No matter how you slice it, what we wear is part of that. An outfit can set the tone for your entire day. It can give you confidence or play up insecurities. It can express a current mood or convey details of your personality. There is no doubt that what you wear can play a large role in how you interact with the world. So let your clothing be something you are comfortable with and take pride in. Not because of what others might think, but because of what your clothes mean to you. Wear a shirt because it makes you feel strong. Buy a scarf because you want to support women in Africa. Hang on to an “off-trend” dress because you always feel pretty in it. The beautiful thing about fashion is that it can be personal and powerful. Remember, no matter what we wear, we are all perfect and beautiful in God’s eyes.
“ I no longer think of my wardrobe as an area that needs work, but as part of my ability to be me: a grounded, appreciative, faith-focused person. This has been the best development in my journey so far.”
Over the past several months, my quest for a new me has shifted to a better focus. I am less concerned with how my daily outfits stack up to others, but more concerned with what I am doing each day in them. I have reached a point of settlement, understanding, and confidence in what I wear each day. I no longer think of my wardrobe as an area that needs work, but as part of my ability to be me: a grounded, appreciative, faith-focused person. This has been the best development in my journey so far.
photo by
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Dixie Pixel
Altar’d State is an energetic fashion boutique that differentiates itself through giving back and offers a distinctive shopping experience for women interested in the latest fashion finds, the most anticipated accessories and that next great gift. Whether she is 16 or 60, the common thread is her desire to share her personality through stylish, comfortable, on-trend clothes, shoes and accessories. Altar’d State customers can enjoy supporting an organization that promotes confidence, civic involvement and positivity through its merchandise and community involvement. Altar’d State is more than a store, it’s a movement. www.altardsate.com
a body image
Cocktail by
I
subconsciously compare myself to what I see around me. Whether it is celebrities in tabloids at the grocery checkout, my “friends� on social media outlets, seemingly normal people on reality TV shows, or the heroine of a blockbuster movie, I am continually shown the same image over and over. An impossible cocktail of women who are thin yet
Emily Rogers
buxom, exotic yet classic, and sweet yet irresistibly sexy challenge my every insecurity. A gauntlet of female requirements that is often only achieved with the assistance of Photoshop and complete mistreatment and manipulation of my pre-designed body tend to rip apart my confidence. fall 2013
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my facts According to me, here is a dose of brutal truth — I have obscenely wide hips, hilariously long femur bones, “go-join-the-circus” feet, swollen knuckles, freckles on my nose that you can’t help but see, two bottom front teeth that are so crooked you could use them to open a can of soup, and very tiny nail beds. I stand at an overwhelming 6 feet 3 inches high and weigh about 170 pounds. My husband's great grandfather proclaimed I was a “full-sized-lady” the first time he met me. Flattering, right? I get asked “Do you play basketball?” approximately 7 times a week. I have had toddlers yell to their mother in disbelief in the grocery store, “It's the tallest woman on earth! WHY IS SHE SO BIG?!” Really, ya'll. This happens. This is my life. I work out about 4-5 times a week because I enjoy it. I also eat pretty healthy because I like to. However, true to my Italian roots, I love to eat copious amounts of pizza, pasta, and drink cheap wine (in moderation). I have been known to completely massacre a pint of ice cream in record timing on the couch with nothing more than a spoon... directly after a workout...call it my spiritual gift. Time and time again in my life I have been crammed into a fitting room at the mercy of a smiley sales associate helping me select clothes. I have successfully shocked the unassuming sales girl when I hand over the pre-selected size 4 blouse and request a size 12. Seriously. Numbers. Figures. Sizes. Pounds. Petites. Longs. Plus sizes. Inches. Inseam. Bust. Waist. Hips. What does it all even mean? “I want to fit into a size 4 pair of jeans.” “I won't shop again until I lose 7 more pounds.” “I need to lose one more inch around my waist.” “I have to be 15 pounds lighter by the beach.” “I'll feel confident when I can wear that size 6 dress.” Want. Until. Need. Have to. When I can. Do you see the common terms? I see the common problems. Dissatisfaction. Anxiety. Pressure. Stress. Insecurity.
the lord’s design In Matthew 6:25-34, we are shown that the worries of what to wear, what to drink, and what to eat cannot just be chalked-up as a sign of the current times. Obsession and fret over what we put in and on our bodies has never been and will never be honoring to the Lord. In scripture, the Lord shows us that our bodies are carefully constructed and intricately woven by his flawless craftsmanship (Genesis 1:27, Psalm 193:13-14, Ephesians 2:10). It is no accident that my femur bones are so long that capris instantly become Bermuda shorts when placed on my legs. It is no coincidence that my face pops with freckles when I've been working in
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I don't gaze down at my minuscule nail beds as I type this and think "Hallelujah! God's goodness poured out on me!" the yard all day no matter how much sunscreen I choose to apply and reapply. I don't gaze down at my minuscule nail beds as I type this and think “Hallelujah! God's goodness poured out on me! The Lord's mercies are new every day! Praise El Shaddai for these dainty nail beds!” BUT — the nitty-gritty, Jesus-centered, gospel truth, reality of it is this — God has designed, more so, intended for me to be this way. It is my response to Him to honor what He has created in me. Dressing appropriately to fit my body, finding modest clothes, and wearing items that create confidence in what my Creator has tailored versus what a designer concocted are ways that I can choose to honor God with my figure.
his truths Throughout years of working in retail and cultivating a sometimes idolatress love of fashion, I've been captured and freed from the threads of transient trends, desire for expensive garments, and the feeling of “I’ve-just-got-to-have-it” over a fabulous makes-your-wholehouse-smell-like-leather messenger bag. God has shown me in my embarrassing worship of these things several different truths. One being this, clothing to cover my body is a necessity with which I can either point towards or away from Him. The second being, style and
fashion can be fun. And the third being that no matter what I put on my body, good or bad, demure or hoochie, honoring or trashy, my true identity must be found in Him alone. Typically when I rest in that third truth, I find freedom in what I wear, fun in taking risks, and justified conviction in dressing to honor my husband and, ultimately, the Lord. God has shown me that the impossible cocktail I've been looking to in the world is nothing of what He has for me. However He sees me — that is how I want to be seen. Shameless dog lover, ruthless Italian food snob, and devoted junk-a-teer, Emily Rogers resides in the Five Points community of Huntsville, AL, with her husband Caleb & their two bearded dogs. Technical writer for pay, graphic designer for fun, and wedding planner for reasons still inexplicable to those who know her best, Emily believes in debunking the myths of what it means to live, speak, and act like a Christian. She values honesty, humor, and humility. Read Emily's writing for a sometimes needed slap-in-theface. Follow her for daily ramblings @emilyprogers.
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beauty from within Reminders of discovering true beauty from our friends Ginger Lang Sansom and Shanon Kyser
Ginger
Authentic friendship and relationship with the Lord and with His body has done so much to create in me a spirit of confidence, which I believe is one of the essences of outward beauty.
B
ecause of the trials endured and my deep faith and blessings I have received through these trials, I have become a stronger person. While I was growing up, my mother often told me that beauty comes from within. This has helped guide me as I’ve matured in life. Trials, tribulations, and good times all work to shape character in our lives. Our responses to life, when we allow Christ to be first in our heart in all things, can mold us into truly beautiful women — caring, considerate, thoughtful, and empathetic women. Church (more importantly, a relationship with Christ) has been very important to me throughout my entire life. The relationships experienced in my sweet church family have proven a source of encouragement, accountability, and reassurance from my Creator.
I
f someone would have asked me ten years ago what it meant to be beautiful, my answer would have been very different than my response today. Ten years ago, I would have responded with a very worldly view of what defines beauty. A typical response would have been, “Tall, thin, blonde hair, and blue eyes.”
Thanks to a relationship with Christ, a marriage, a child, and some difficult life experiences, my definition of beauty is completely different. I now realize that you create beauty with your actions, your words, and your behavior. A woman may meet society’s standards of having the perfect figure, perfect hair, perfect skin, and yet still be extremely distant from being truly beautiful — with a beauty that will last over time. As it states in Proverbs 31:30, “Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.” In my life I have come to realize that I am a true child of God who is fearfully and wonderfully made by my Creator. Christ sees no imperfections in my appearance.
While serving as an ambassador for the Chamber of Commerce, I have also had the opportunity to serve our community by taking meals to homebound persons, helping with the Women’s Job Corp, and even raising money for ministry oriented fashion shows. All of these activities as well as working in the public helped to make me aware of fashion during the years. Being aware of the fashion trend during those days, I dressed accordingly. I even enjoyed all the fashions that were all the rage. However, trying to meet the world’s view of what we should be by the clothes we wear or the newest hairdo often leads us to think we have to dress or look a certain way in order to be “pretty.” Oftentimes, the newest rage in fashion is also very uncomfortable and unflattering. As I have matured, I still enjoy fashion but now I dress more for comfort and what feels good to me, which makes me feel pretty in my own unique way. I have come to believe that true beauty is not about which trendy top or the next new shoe style I wear, but rather how I love and serve others. Often reflecting on my mother’s words, I now understand what she meant by “ beauty comes from within.” With that being said, I try to remember to live by doing unto others as I would have them do unto me (Matthew 7:12 paraphrase), which I believe would be how God defines true beauty.
Shanon
My beauty is affirmed by the words of worship music speaking to my soul, my husband’s gentle embrace every afternoon when he comes home from work, and my son’s sweet kiss before he leaves for school each day. My beauty is displayed in my daily interactions with those around me. Most importantly, I know that I am beautiful because God made me!
Thank God Downhill for the
by
Sandy Robinson of Twitch Fitness
see me in my struggle or if I can possibly keep going without anyone figuring out how hard this really is for me? Why do I care that much what others might think? Well, you see, I’m a personal fitness trainer. More often than not, in the eyes of those who know what I do — they expect me to be physically perfect. I’m expected to eat perfectly, train perfectly, and be the strongest, fastest, healthiest, and thinnest version of myself.
chase for perfection
photo by
Renee Hargrove
I
t’s Saturday at 9:30 on a cool and sunny spring morning. As I start out on my planned long run of the week, I begin to picture in my mind the path that is ahead of me. I’m motivated, eager, and excited to accomplish my goal.
in slow motion Fifteen minutes into my run I am quickly reminded of how heavy each stride feels and how steep the next hill is. I think about how awkward I must look to the people driving by. Lethargic, weak, and sometimes feeling as if I am in slow motion, I wonder if anyone I know is going to
Is it possible that I can “fake it ‘til I make it?” Is it possible that if I have enough discipline, follow the rules, design the perfect plan, and take the perfect supplements that I can indeed be perfect when it comes to my body and fitness? Maybe, just maybe if I do, then I can meet the expectations of the world around me and I too, can be perfect. That’s probably something we’ve all probably thought at one time or another. Those thoughts and the chase of perfection are neither healthy nor reasonable, but in moments of desiring to meet expectations, we often strive outside of reality. All too often, as I train my clients, that same struggle is manifested in their lives as well. They come to me because in their mind they want to achieve what they believe is physical perfection. The problem is, we will never, and I mean NEVER achieve that based on anything we can do in this world. There will always be failure, let downs, and sin that maintains our imperfections. Romans 7:18 says, “…for I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out.” fall 2013
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“For while bodily training is of some value, godliness is of value in every way, as it holds up promise for the present life and also for the life to come.” -1 Timothy 4:8 training god’s way So, what should our training look like? What should our goals for our physical health be realistically and biblically be? The Bible also says in 1 Timothy 4:8, “For while bodily training is of some value, godliness is of value in every way, as it holds up promise for the present life and also for the life to come.” I want to encourage those who read this column to focus on strengthening your relationship with Jesus Christ first and foremost. You see, true happiness is not in seeking to attain the perfect body, the perfect health, or the perfect fitness accomplishments. True happiness isn’t about looking to what you don’t have. It’s in the joy of Christ and the grace He provides us minute by minute in our many imperfections. The imperfections are what make His grace sufficient, needed, and PERFECT.
transformation Once you have that as your first priority, then you will understand the joy of obedience to his desire for us to take care of our bodies. Being “perfect” will no longer be a list of worldly rules, rather it will be a daily walk of repentance, grace, and continually dusting ourselves off and
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trying again. Romans 12:1-2 says, “I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”
reaching the peak As I continued my run, I reflected on another pair of runners coming in my direction, climbing the same hill, with the same look of despair. I feel their pain and share their determination. As we both reached the peak of the hill I no longer cared about my many imperfections, rather I exclaimed, “Thank God for the downhill!” They both looked at me curiously and with a big sigh of exhaustion, they both smiled and agreed. Isn’t it great how God not only creates the hills for us to climb and challenge us, but he also provides us the downhill so we can rest? How awesome is it to know that he has thought of every little detail in our life, even the downhill!
The Heart Behind Fitness by
A
s a woman, we want to feel beautiful, so we look to many different things to help us decide what that means: our size, our weight, our complexion, our style, our social class...the list goes on and on. I have personally come to the conclusion that beautiful comes in all sizes, shapes, complexions, and styles. What is most important is that we search for our beauty in Christ. One of the many ways we can practically live this out is by simply taking care of the bodies He has given us in order to glorify Him rather than trying to measure up to some worldly standard. As a personal trainer, I have had the privilege to train some amazing women over the past six years. I can honestly say that I see a unique beauty in every one of them — they all demonstrate the care and craftsmanship of God’s handiwork. Yet, rarely do they ever see the same beauty in themselves. I would like to share with you the journey of one of the very dear women that I have had the privilege of working with. Nothing I could ever write or say could adequately describe the amazing beauty I see in her each and every time we meet. One of my greatest goals in working with her, as well as my other clients, is not only to teach her the fundamentals of fitness and nutrition, but to teach them to truly celebrate their own beauty in their current bodies — just how God designed them.
Meet Andrea. She is a 38 year old wife and mother of two children. She lives a very full life in serving her family, friends, church, and
Sandy Robinson of Twitch Fitness
answers by
Andrea Johnson
community. First impressions of Andrea attract you to her because of her natural beauty, her presence of peace, and aura of wisdom.
What did you think when you would look at yourself in the mirror growing up? What do you think as an adult? As a very young girl, I always liked looking at myself in the mirror. My father regularly told me that I was the most beautiful girl he had ever known — and he still does. I felt confident and pretty. It wasn’t until around the age of nine or ten that I entered a heavier stage and began doubting those words of my father. I became more self-conscious of my weight and was critical of my physical appearance. Unfortunately, that negative way of thinking continued almost seamlessly into adulthood. Even now, I tend to focus on my “problem areas” when I look into the mirror. I still battle feelings of frustration, failure, and discontentment.
Why do you feel your weight/health got out of hand? Growing up, my family enjoyed spending time together. Often, we spent that time around the table! My mother is an incredible cook and learning to enjoy food while practicing moderation was and still is a challenge for me. It takes balance and self-control.
What was the turning point for you in making the decision to lead a healthier life? Multiple members of my immediate family struggle with diabetes and have experienced dangerous, life-threatening heart issues. When fall 2013
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I realized that these weight and health issues were all around me, I began to become very aware of what I was choosing to put into my body. I know that I bring my own set of health issues as well. I have lived with psoriasis for as long as I can remember. Psoriasis is an auto-immune disease that makes me more prone to obesity and heart disease. Given all of these realizations while anticipating and planning a 10-year-anniversary cruise with my husband, it finally made sense — I wanted (and needed!) to get started with a healthier lifestyle.
What has God done in your heart to make you ready for a life change? I would say that laziness is a controlling sin in my life. He has revealed and regularly reminds me of the presence of this sin. It is something that I have to consistently be intentional about giving over to Him. Without full submission of this toxic sin to the Lord, I am helpless to combat my own tendencies.
successfully destroy our marriage, family, or ministry — then we would not be effective in the building of His Kingdom. Contributing to the work of Christ is my ultimate purpose as an individual, wife, and mother. Even more deceitful than outright destroying our marriage and home, the enemy can also keep us preoccupied with thoughts that really shouldn’t consume us — for example, weight.
How can God make you victorious in this aspect of your life? He has given me scripture which I rely on daily. It helps to remind me that what makes me beautiful in the eyes of my Heavenly Father and my husband is not my outward appearance, but my spirit and who God has made me with His intentional craftsmanship. I pray regularly for a gentle and quiet spirit that would be honoring to both my husband and my Heavenly Father. “Do not let your adorning be external — the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry or the clothing you wear — but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious” (1Peter 3:3).
What would you like to see when you look in the mirror? I would love to see a woman that is honoring the Lord in her words and actions and is satisfied with the temporarily imperfect results.
What kind of woman do you want to be and how does your health/fitness fit into that equation?
What lies have you believed about yourself pertaining to I want to be a great example to my kids — both spiritually and your inner beauty, your outer beauty, and your self-worth? So much of how I feel about myself is tied to the numbers on my scale. It is unfortunate how many areas of my life are affected by my weight. My self-esteem, confidence, and desire to honor the Lord are all impacted by those silly numbers that I’ve decided mean so much. This issue is particularly true in my marriage. I find myself making assumptions about how my husband feels about me that are truly ways that I feel about myself. These feelings often lead me to thinking that I am not a worthy mother and wife.
How do you feel that the devil has played a part in your struggle? Why would he attack you like that?
physically. I want to teach them good eating and exercising habits, self-control, and a healthy self-image. I want to see my body as a gift to my husband and honor him by making good choices in diet and exercise. Mostly, I want to be continually growing in my relationship with Christ. I know that will involve a constant battle of knocking down the idols of food and laziness and trusting Him. At the end of each day, each work out, each spoonful of Nutella, each 5K, each bowl of taco soup from my mom’s house, each bike ride with my kids, and each salad — I am still His daughter and I am learning to rest in that.
By God’s grace, my husband and I have been gifted with an amazing marriage and two really fun, loving, down-right hilarious kids. He has been so good to us in this way. I know that the enemy would love nothing more than to destroy what God has done in us. Sure, we are flawed. Aren’t we all? Yet, I am honored to see how God uses our marriage to model Christ and His bride to those around us. He uses us regularly in the lives of others as we offer both pre-marital and marriage counseling. If I dwelled in my imperfections and did not let Christ redeem and repair me in moments of weakness, we would cease to be used for His kingdom in the lives of others.
My goal is to share my personal life experiences and professional wisdom on how the reader can use these lessons to also further their relationship with Christ.
He has also given me the amazing privilege of being the director of Children’s Ministry at our home church. If the enemy were to
Sandy Robinson, Certified Personal Trainer Twitch Fitness, LLC Sandy@twitchfitness.com
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My name is Sandy Robinson. I am a Christ follower. I am blessed with my first ministry to be the wife of the man of my dreams, and mother of a blended family of two sons, a daughter, and a stepdaughter. I also serve in ministry as a Personal Trainer for women in my home studio gym. It is my belief that God has called me to serve him through teaching women in a nonintimidating home environment how to love God, love others, and love themselves by taking care of their body.
{
Real Hope
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We feel the unrest, the tension, the pulling on our hearts that there is something better, something more. When we realize that things aren't as they should be, that there is discord between how our lives are and how we hoped they should be — it is then that we need desperately to be reminded. Reminded of the beauty of reconciliation, of being reunited in our hearts and minds with Christ; of how He repairs our relationships with Himself and how He is capable of mending and restoring our relationships with one another. Through changing perspectives and adjusting our hearts, the hope in Christ's claim on our lives can give us strength and confidence to demonstrate His reconciliation towards others.
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Get to Know Jesus
Hope Suffering
in
by
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Nathan Jewett
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For us suffering can bring about an incredible feeling of helplessness because, let’s face it, there really isn’t anything we can do to make it better.
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n January 18, 2013 I received a phone call that would dramatically shape the days, weeks, months, and years to come. On that unsuspecting winter evening, we learned that my wife’s mother had just passed away unexpectedly. There really isn’t much one can do to prepare mentally and emotionally for a call like that. One minute we were in the process of unpacking and settling into our recently purchased home, and the next, we were traveling across the country to talk about funerals and final wishes. What followed was a season of suffering in our home unlike anything I have ever experienced before. Without a doubt, it hit my wife the hardest; it was her mother after all. However, as the head of our household, I felt this overwhelming burden of trying to navigate us through the rough waters of this particularly violent storm.
Now I don’t know about you, but I’m not really sure what the normal reaction to suffering is. I would imagine some people simply disconnect from reality, perhaps thinking to themselves that if it doesn’t feel real, then maybe it isn’t. Perhaps others find themselves consumed with rage as a result of the circumstances, which seem to never show signs of improving. And maybe some people are like me, someone who is constantly trying to fix things and make them right. For us suffering can bring about an incredible feeling of helplessness because, let’s face it, there really isn’t anything we can do to make it better.
a different perspective Have you ever asked yourself the simple question, what is the right response to suffering? For many years I have simply viewed suffering as something we needed to survive and maybe that is true to a certain extent. But the apostle Paul seems to have a different perspective on
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this issue. In Romans 5:3 he makes this incredible statement, “Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings.” Yep, you read that correct. To be honest, when I read those words for the first time I had to go back and read them again just to make sure I read them correctly. Sure enough, he said we rejoice in our sufferings. Now there are very few things in this world that seem more counter intuitive to me than this statement. If I were to make a list of the many things I would like to do in the midst of my suffering, I can assure you rejoicing would be somewhere near the bottom of the list. Yet what I find interesting about Paul’s statement here is that he isn’t commanding us to rejoice in our suffering, he’s simply saying those who have been justified by faith (Romans 5:1) will rejoice in suffering. It’s not an imperative; it’s a description! How on earth could the apostle make a claim so bold as this? Fortunately for us, Paul helped with the answer. As we continue reading in Romans 5, he shows a progression in the life of a believer that comes as a result of suffering.
suffering produces endurance First, we see that suffering produces endurance (Romans 5:3). When we suffer, we learn to endure. In many ways when we suffer, we are forced to endure. You could almost say it’s an inevitable byproduct of suffering. Anyone who has participated in long distance running for any significant period of time can attest to this simple truth. Just physically speaking, when we first begin to run we generally realize how incredibly out of shape we are and how ill equipped we are for the task at hand. Those first several miles are always among the most excruciating and painful. Why? Because a runner must build endurance first. And though it is most definitely a different type of suffering, one could say the runner must suffer for a while to build fall 2013
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“
Have you considered the possibility that God might be using the suffering in your life to develop in you the endurance required so that you might persevere to the end?
up the endurance necessary to one day enable them to complete the race. Paul reminds us here that suffering produces in us endurance, and endurance is necessary in the Christian life. Have you considered the possibility that God might be using the suffering in your life to develop in you the endurance required so that you might persevere to the end?
endurance produces character But it doesn’t stop there. Secondly, we see that endurance produces character (Romans 5:4). Now this word for character can be a little misleading at first glance. This word might be better understood as “proven character” or more simply the “proof” of our endurance. It’s a word that would have been commonly associated with the blacksmithing industry. The “proof” was all that remained after the skilled smith would work the metal through the fire, melting off and hammering out any imperfections until all that remained was a tempered steel. In a similar way, Paul is saying the character that remains through our endurance in the midst of suffering is kind of like that metal. Our character is the tempered steel of faith refined through the fires of endurance in suffering.
character produces hope And last, but certainly not least, we see that character produces hope (Romans 5:4). Here, we come full circle in Paul’s line of reasoning. However, the hope we find in Scripture is not the hope we use in our day to day conversations. Hope to us is often nothing more than wishful thinking with a built in assumption that it may not come to pass. We hope our favorite team wins the big game, but know there’s a very real possibility they may not. Not so with the hope we find in Scripture. To Paul, there was not the slightest hint of doubt. Instead,
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this hope was one of absolute certainty. The proof of what God has done in the past reinforces the certainty of our belief in what he is yet to do in the future. So let’s start putting all of this together. I would submit that one of the primary reasons God ordains suffering in our lives is because suffering produces endurance, and without endurance we will never make it to the end. Our endurance produces proven character within us, which testifies to God’s faithfulness as demonstrated in the sufficient work of Jesus Christ on the cross. And that proven character testifies to the complete assurance we have in God, therefore creating in us a hope that does not waiver. And here we are back at the beginning of Paul’s argument. How on earth can he say we rejoice in the midst of our suffering? Well, if our suffering is a means by which we ultimately come to hope in God all the more, then let us rejoice! Does that mean my wife and I now look at the circumstances of the past year with rejoicing hearts each and every day? Certainly not. Left to ourselves, we aren’t even capable of rejoicing in our sufferings for a single moment. But we can cling to the glorious gospel of Jesus Christ even in our darkest hours knowing that hope ultimately awaits all who trust not in themselves, but in the perfect work of our one and only Savior.
Nathan Jewett is a follower of Christ, husband to Amber, and pastor at Summit Crossing Community Church in Huntsville, AL. He studied Bible and Preaching in Dallas, TX before moving to Alabama in 2010.
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Grow in Jesus
Reconciliation: by
Katie Caldwell
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God’s Great Plan
econciliation is one of the most beautiful words in our vocabulary. In the eyes of the world, it means a state of restored harmony after discord. However, as much as there may be times when reconciliation takes place with man, the ultimate example of reconciliation is not man-made — it is heaven-made. People have the tendency to run from reconciliation, in fact, destroy it. Think about it — divorce, war, murder, lost friendships, and lawsuits are all man’s inventions and thrive where
reconciliation is not truly sought. Reconciliation is God’s idea and that is what makes it so precious. Romans 5:1-11 has much to say about God reconciling man to Himself. The first two verses teach that Christ is the way to peace with God and that faith is the key that allows us to access true reconciliation. When Jesus Christ paid the penalty for our sin, the Cross became the
“Reconciliation is God’s idea and that is what makes it so precious.”
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stage upon which God’s greatest promise became reality — a restored relationship with His people (Isaiah 62:11-12). Faith in this promised reality allows us to stand as people reconciled to their awesome Creator.
the master plan My husband Matt first noticed me as a lowly freshman at Auburn University, and it didn’t take long for him to begin his pursuit. I, however, wanted nothing to do with him. Week after week, month after month, he found various ways to ask me out, and every time, I had excuses: “I have to study” and “I have to cut the grass. Yes, I know I live in a dorm, but the grass needs cutting.” At one point I even called him a stalker - harsh, I know. However, little did I know that he had initiated what he proudly calls his “Master Plan”- and it worked! It took some time and some craftiness on his part, but the Spirit finally opened my eyes to see the awesome opportunity for love that was before me. Even after all my attempts to avoid a relationship with Matt, he continued to pursue me and seek reconciliation. While Matt is not perfect, he is a very good example of the great lengths to which God reconciles the unlovable to Himself and shows them His love. Even though I did not want anything to do with Matt, he pursued me. In the same manner, we wanted nothing to do with God, but He pursued us. Romans 5:9-11 continues to explain this wonderful truth with much harsher words: enemies, wrath, and death. We should never ignore harsh passages of Scripture — God uses stern language to communicate the reality of sin and our need for grace. In this passage, we see the need for the cross. Before Christ’s sacrifice, we were God’s enemies, completely opposed to Him and His desires for us. Before Christ’s sacrifice, we faced God’s wrath as the penalty for sin.
ambassadors on mission However, in the midst of hopelessness, Jesus’ death provides reconciliation between the Father and His people. His resurrection allows us to enjoy a relationship with God for all eternity! So, how can we apply this to our lives right now? Second Corinthians 5:1620 describes how believers are to act now that they have reconciliation with God. It describes us as “Christ’s ambassadors” who proclaim to the world that God has made a way for people to have reconciliation with Him- “not counting men’s sins against them.” He has given us a mission and a message that we must tell to everyone: “Be reconciled to God” (v. 20b). We are to see people as God sees them (v. 16) and have a ministry that shows them the way to reconciliation. I believe that one of the best ways that we can proclaim God’s reconciliation is to model it in our relationships with one another. When the person you love pushes you away, forgive and seek peace with them. If you have pushed a loved one out of your life, make every effort to mend the broken bridge. Our relationships illustrate our relationship with God. Therefore, make every effort to allow His love to provide an environment of peace and reconciliation within our relationships!
at all! Instead, it is the means through which believers become more like Him. Romans 5:3-5 illustrates this beautifully. Even though we have reconciliation with God, we are still in this world for a time. This world is cruel, difficult, and hopeless — after all, we are all guaranteed the same fate. However, peace with God allows believers to have peace in the midst of difficult situations and to grow stronger and deeper in hope — our ultimate hope of eternity. Verse 2b says, “And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God” (NIV). This hope of glorification is our reward! But that’s a subject for another day... Katie Caldwell is a small-town girl from Hayden, AL, whom God called to missions as a teenager. She graduated from Auburn University with a B.A. in Spanish in 2008 and served for two years as a Journeyman with the IMB in Peru and Bolivia. She married her college sweetheart, Matt, and in 2012 they added son Owen to the family. She is currently finishing her M.Div. in International Church Planting at Southern Baptist Theological Seminary in Louisville, KY. While she and Matt wait to serve as medical missionaries abroad, God has allowed her to speak at missions’ conferences, and she finds great joy in encouraging others to obey the Great Commission of Christ. Check out her blog A Disciple’s Sketches at www.adisciplessketches.wordpress.com.
More Study Passages: Proverbs 10:12; 15:1; 17:9 Jeremiah 30-31; 32:38-41 Matthew 5:21-32 John 17:20-23 1 Corinthians 3:1-23
not the end… only the beginning Keep this in mind: Reconciliation is not the end of Christ’s work. Not fall 2013
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FEATURE
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Liz Hur ley
Survivor & Champion shared by Liz
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hen she walks into a room, people stop and look. They can’t help it. Standing at a statuesque six feet and one inch, the beautiful blonde has an aura about her that commands attention. The more I talked with her, the more I realized where that aura comes from. It generates from a sense of selfpurpose, self-awareness, and confidence. It comes from a deep care for other people and the community that she lives in and loves. It comes from her genuine interest and curiosity about what is around her — the deeper meaning, the hidden story. And it comes from an unquenchable thirst for life — an appreciation for what matters most. Yes, that’s how I would describe Liz Hurley. However, there is one very important description that I left out and that is survivor. More specifically, she is a breast cancer survivor. Many in the North Alabama community know Liz Hurley. She is a familiar face on the local news station WAFF48 News. She has many accomplishments under her belt including several journalist awards and the distinguished opportunity to anchor for the Centennial Olympic Games in 1996. Raised in Florida, the Lord knew that Liz needed to be a part of the Huntsville, Alabama, community. Through a series of events, most of them not lining up with her original ideas of how her life should go, He brought her there. Liz is honored to be a part of the culture where God placed her. She feels very strongly about the people in Huntsville and celebrates the fact that “she grew where she was planted.” Breast Cancer was not a foreign concept to Liz whose own mother was diagnosed with it at the age of thirty. Six years later, Liz, who was only twelve at the time, lost her mother to that battle. It had a profound impact on her in so many ways, one of which was the development of a unique
Hurley
diligence toward her prevention and early detection efforts to ward of the fatal disease. Against doctor’s recommendations, she started annual mammograms at the age of 26. She had two small children, so she wasn’t going to take chances. Her diligence and her awareness paid off one summer day in 1998. Not feeling well and thinking that a shower would help perk her up and get her ready for her afternoon newscast, she attempted to wash away her yucky feelings. While soaping up, she felt it: that lump on her breast — her left breast, the same area her mom had discovered hers. Throwing on her clothes, she rushed to her doctor’s office and knocked on the door. It was the beginning of the biggest story of her life.
under attack Thrown into a whirlwind of emotion and activity, doctor appointments, specialists, and recommendations, Liz was presented with two choices: she could pursue the traditional treatment for her breast cancer of surgery and then chemotherapy or she could pioneer a new path — one of chemotherapy first with surgery to follow, technically called neo-adjuvant chemotherapy. Back in 1998, the chemo first path was a revolutionary step in treatment of cancer with little evidence of its benefits. The unknown proved scary to Liz, but she knew that decisions needed to be made and they needed to be made fast. Her cancer was aggressive, and no matter what path she chose, the sooner she got started the better her prognosis would be. Education empowered her. She sought out specialists. She read medical journals. She learned about as much as the doctor knew. She developed into her own advocate and best ally. She became educated on cancer, researching the latest information and treatments. Even to this day, she stays well-informed to the extent that I would describe fall 2013
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Liz and her daughter remember the legacy her mother left behind after losing her fight with breast cancer, as Liz now strives to encourage early prevention and detection within their family and in the community.
her as a walking encyclopedia of cancer knowledge. This education was her greatest weapon in the fight to beat it. Besides, you must know your enemy in order to defeat it. But the question was still begging to be answered at the proverbial fork in the road. What road should she take? Should she take the traditional recommended route — surgery first and then chemo — like her mother did, or should she pioneer that new path — the path of chemo to shrink the tumor and then surgery? In a situation littered with land mines, she was desperate not to make the wrong decision. With two small children at home and having experienced the loss of her own mother to such eerily similar circumstances, she was terrified of the consequences.
Caught in a tug of war between her brain and her heart, she prayed for a sign. She knew that she had to make a decision soon. The doctors had given her a deadline to decide. Her heart and mind and almost everything in her were leaning toward having the chemo first. It just made sense to her that she do the opposite of what her mom had done. Still, she hesitated. Despite receiving many unsolicited calls encouraging her to do the chemo first, she still found herself wishing and asking God for that blinking neon sign. One evening, Liz headed out with her family to shattered
At that moment, Liz looked up into the sky and saw it — a double rainbow to which she exclaimed, “Well, that’s a pretty good sign!” But if that wasn’t good enough, she swears (and so does her husband) that the double rainbow actually led them to their house and ended in their driveway. Not being one to exaggerate the details given her journalist background, her explanation of God’s display of grace in her life left goose bumps on my arms.
“if you don’t laugh, you’ll cry”
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Mr. Gatti’s Pizza to a birthday party for her son’s 8-year-old friend. (Even with cancer, life was still going on and she was still mama.) In the middle of that party, a violent thunderstorm erupted. After the storm calmed down, the family found themselves back in their car viewing the light streaming through the clouds.
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Through it all, Liz kept her sense of humor. She described a parade for the “Drive for the Cure” event through the middle of town where she rode in a convertible with the Mayor Loretta Spencer of Huntsville at the time. She had just reached the point in her chemo treatments where they had warned her that she might start to experience hair loss. As it crossed her mind that she was sitting in a convertible with the wind blowing through her hair, she realized it might all just blow it off at any second. So, she warned the mayor with a laugh as Liz explains that “there are just some times when you have joke about your circumstance otherwise it can overwhelm you with its seriousness.”
Throughout her battle with cancer, which entailed chemotherapy and multiple surgeries (including a double mastectomy and breast reconstruction), Liz clung to the great God that she loved and served. Receiving the diagnosis of cancer definitely caused her to take a close look at the Lord and her beliefs. She leaned on scripture heavily, reciting Proverbs 3:5-6 to herself constantly: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”
living life fully Once you meet Liz, it’s undeniable that she cares deeply about the community and the people around her. Because she believes that God has kept her around for the purpose of helping others with her story and sharing her knowledge, she is the first to respond to someone who asks for help. She’ll go to visit people diagnosed with cancer and sit by their bedsides or just be that sounding board to offer them the advice and encouragement that they need to hear. “It’s all about the individual,” Liz explains. People call her frequently: “Liz,” dead air, and then their story takes off. She always knows what that story will be and she loves the fact that people feel empowered to call her. She has a heart and a willingness to help them feel encouraged — to offer them some answers or that roadmap that they might be looking for. “The beginning is overwhelming.” When you hear the words “you have cancer,” Liz describes the overwhelming fear and loneliness that can seem to engulf you. “The first news of cancer is always terrifying! My purpose is to be their champion. The only requirement is that they first have to ask for my help; then I will come.”
greater perspective
– ultimate purpose
Liz’s fight against cancer continues. Though she won her own battle against cancer, she recognizes that there is a war still raging. Her desire is to help others fight their battles and the community to wage the war at a larger level. As Liz recovered from cancer, the community began to invite her to share her story with them. As a survivor, she started to speak at churches about her wrestle with breast cancer, receiving an abundance of donations in response. Even though she attempted to return or refuse the money on many occasions, the organizations urged her to keep it — ensuring her that one day she would know what to do with it. Ultimately, as the stash of money donated to her began to grow, she knew that she had to make a decision on what to do with the funds.
“ The first news of cancer is always terrifying! My purpose is to be their champion. The only requirement is that they first have to ask for my help; then I will come.” Liz Hurley fall 2013
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So, she approached the Huntsville Hospital Foundation to see if they would have an idea. With their help and encouragement, she was able to start a fund known today as the Liz Hurley Breast Cancer Fund. Through much prayer and financial support of many amazing donors, they were able to support a project to construct and provide advanced diagnosis and testing equipment for the Huntsville Breast Cancer Center currently used in the Huntsville Hospital for Women and Children. Within ten years, the Liz Hurley Breast Cancer fund raised more than three million dollars and just this past December, the Madison Breast Center was able to open with the help of Liz’s fund. But the movement traveled further. One day, the CEO of Huntsville Hospital suggested doing a run devoted to breast cancer. Liz was ecstatic. Nothing like that had been done and the idea was exciting and the possibilities were endless. Ultimately, this idea of a 5K would be responsible for bringing thousands of people from all different backgrounds and all types of stories together for a common goal — defeating cancer. And so the Ribbon Run began in 2003.
more than a walk, run, or jog The Liz Hurley Ribbon Run has been taking place every fall for nine years, and this year will be its tenth anniversary. With the Men’s 5K, Women’s 5K, and Survivors Walk, all individuals touched by breast cancer in some shape or form are able to participate and be a part of the army fighting against breast cancer. Within the sea of over 5,000 pink shirts, tutus, and painted bras are people who are not only running for their own cause, but for the cause of loved ones — living or lost. The emotions of that day can be overwhelmingly powerful. Liz’s story did more than she could have ever imagined when she was diagnosed with breast cancer. By giving her situation to God, Liz allowed Him to not only transform her heart and her perspective, but to use her to transform a whole city.
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You can be a part of the fight against breast cancer too. Sign up for the tenth annual Liz Hurley Ribbon Run at www.lizhurleyribbonrun.org. For more information about the Huntsville Hospital Foundation and the Liz Hurley Fund, please visit their website at www.foundation. hhsys.org. They have a complete listing of the amazing equipment and services that they have been able to provide through their fundraising efforts.
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Encouragement
In Christ, we are...
R E C O N C I L E D
Learning who we are in Christ
photo provided by
Anna Hithersay
“A Shower of Grace” by
Anna Hithersay
overwhelming emotions
blame anyone except for ourselves or God.
hen I think of reconciliation, I think about things meeting up and matching the way God intended. It is said that the space between expectations and reality is disappointment. To me, reconciliation holds expectations and reality by their hands and helps them reach each other across the gap of disappointment. This is hard work when what needs to be reconciled is two people’s expectations of each other. It may be even harder when the reconciliation is between our own expectations and the reality of God’s plan for our life. When the work of reconciliation is within our own spirit, we can no longer
I know a bit about that latter form of reconciliation between the desires of my heart and God’s plan for my life. While I certainly did not have a trouble-free life, I did not run into serious disappointment until my husband and I decided to start a family. Not until it became evident that our plan was not going to take the desired path did I realize how strong and specific my expectations were. Months and years went by as we waited for a child. I was disappointed. I was discontent. I was grieving. And I was not reconciled to the new future that I could catch a
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glimpse of as the months went by. After several years of waiting, we faced a dilemma: should we pursue infertility treatments or adoption? At the point of making that decision, I felt that I was finally at peace with the infertility. I was ready to pursue adoption. I felt like my mind’s understanding of God’s love for us and the grace and goodness to be found in adoption had helped convince my heart as well. But the reality of that decision also flooded me with overwhelming emotions of sadness, discouragement, and anger. It wasn’t a lack of peace with the decision; I have never doubted that adoption was the right choice. Rather, it was a new level of grieving over the finality of our decision. And I was finally forced to confront something I had ignored for years. I was angry at God. The vision I always had for my family was based on my understanding of God’s plan for all families and it made me angry to have to abandon that vision. I knew He had created me to be a mother and placed a strong desire for children in my heart, but I was angry at being asked to wait. I knew I was more ready than many to become a parent. I felt resentment when others were blessed with children while I was not. Our infertility and God’s decision to direct our path towards starting a family differently than my vision did not make sense to me.
the reconciliation process Shortly after starting the adoption process I agreed to go on a teaching trip to Tanzania. I viewed it as a welcomed distraction that would fill the wait for our child. Looking back I can see that God intentionally called me to Africa because He wanted me to be alone. It was time for Him and me to work out my anger. I was assigned to teach on faith, but as I prepared I knew I wasn’t quite ready yet. I knew that my infertility story needed to play a part, but I didn’t know how to share. I didn’t know that I hadn’t yet discovered the missing link that would bind it all together. I spent the evenings of the trip studying Hebrews 11, the assigned passage for the faith lesson, and tried to prepare my teaching outline. Every story in that chapter was speaking to my spirit about how God’s plans are not our plans. God taught me that week that faith is a choice we make, by the power of the Holy Spirit, to say yes to God’s plan. My faith in God, in Christ’s redemptive work, and in the Holy Spirit’s power to assist me leads me to a reconciliation between my desires and God’s plan. When we make that choice, it allows Him to bridge the gap of our disappointment so that our expectations can be reconciled with His ultimate plan and purpose for our lives.
god’s plan revealed Because of what God was showing me in Scripture, I changed my teaching outline to center around my journey to become a Mama. I stood up to teach my lesson in the heat of the day in a little church on a hill. I had not slept well and was feeling weak, so we prayed for a cooling rain just before I got up to teach. As I began to tell my story, the women’s attention was magnetic. In their culture, women are defined by their motherhood, so my willingness to stand from a place of weakness as a childless woman and teach about God’s design for me as a Mama was powerful.
My faith in God, in Christ’s redemptive work, and in the Holy Spirit’s power to assist me leads me to a reconciliation between my desires and God’s plan. When we make that choice, it allows Him to bridge the gap of our disappointment so that our expectations can be reconciled with His ultimate plan and purpose for our lives. Shortly into my testimony, the rain we prayed for began to fall. The cooling relief was immediate, but the rain fell harder and harder, and as it hit the tin roof it drowned out my words despite the power of the microphone. My interpreter stopped me and decided to say a prayer that the rain would stop so the women could hear my story. Immediately the rain slowed to a gentle shower, allowing me to finish my teaching in the cool quiet that followed the rainstorm. I am so thankful for the gift of that experience. It was an exclamation point that emphasized what God taught me about His power in our lives and the role our faith plays in reconciliation with Him. I came home from that trip a changed woman. That experience did not take away my need to grieve my disappointments, but it reframed my experience. I finally confronted my anger towards God. He met me there and gently taught me about the gift of reconciliation. Through faith, He had already given me what was mine for the choosing. Then he showered a little miracle upon me as a reminder of his loving care for me. Anna is a lover of books, history, nature, and all things beautiful, whimsical, and grounded in authenticity. She earned a degree in History with a minor in English, then a Masters Degree in Library Science, and spent several years working as an academic reference librarian. After years of infertility, she and her husband Jason welcomed their son Nathan home from his birth-country of South Korea in July 2012. Anna is passionate about social justice for orphans and women as well as keeping her eyes open to the little gifts of grace God gives her throughout each day. In her free time she enjoys reading, writing, calligraphy, playing piano and blogging at www.comehitherandstay.com. Anna and her family make their home in Dallas, TX. fall 2013
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Accepting the Challenge by by Karol Karol Ladd Ladd
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One of the most memorable trips we took as a family was to the hill country of Texas back when our daughters were in middle school. We decided to explore a state park with a unique giant rock formation called Enchanted Rock. As we watched other hikers ascend the mount, we felt compelled to do the same. Within minutes, we were a vigorously climbing family machine reaching the top in no time. What victory! We had proudly conquered the mountain — well it was more of a mount — and the view was breathtaking! We were able to see for miles and miles in every direction. Soon it began to rain, and we realized it was time to descend the amazing mount. Did I mention that Enchanted Rock is a rather large smooth rock? Somehow it was not a problem getting up, but with the rain and the steep slope, it was a big problem getting down. We took
it slowly, methodically and carefully, recognizing that one little slip could send us into an injury-laden fall. We found a less-steep path on the other side of the mount, and my husband helped each of the kids as we crossed over difficult spots. We were elated when we finally touched horizontal ground. Although the descent was rather challenging, it turned out to be a good experience. It was an opportunity for the four of us to depend on one another for support and encouragement along the way. Getting down the mount safely was truly a much sweeter victory than making it to the top. You may find yourself struggling emotionally through the storms of life or perhaps you have experienced a disappointment or loss that has
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We take healthy steps forward when we acknowledge we are experiencing heartbreak or disappointment or feeling blue emotionally. really got you down. Just as it was necessary for us to work together and carefully make our way down the steep slopes of Enchanted Rock, so you may find that you need others to help you as you make your way back to level ground again. Just take one step at a time, day by day, hour by hour with the Lord as your guide and strength. Allow the people he has put into your life to be encouragers along the way.
yes; stay there, no. I’m reminded of David’s words in Psalm 103 as he described God’s attributes, “He redeems your life from the pit.” God is a redeeming God and He is able to redeem, restore, and bring reconciliation to even the deepest darkest pit or the most difficult emotional mountain. He may bring help in the form of a counselor or an encouraging friend, or He may bring comfort through his word.
We take healthy steps forward when we acknowledge we are experiencing heartbreak or disappointment or feeling blue emotionally. It hurts when our dreams die or our plans perish. When things turn out differently than we thought they would or could we may experience an emotional letdown or pain, and yet we take a positive step forward when we accept the honest fact that we are sad or down.
We’ve all had pit experiences — times when we can’t seem to see a way out. Personally, I have found great encouragement from reading the words of a pit-dwelling, Old Testament prophet named Jeremiah. He is known as the “weeping prophet.” Can you believe that? Encouragement from the weeping prophet! But I think you will be encouraged too. As Jeremiah grieved, he turned his eyes from his pit toward the day-to-day faithfulness of the Lord. Notice how Jeremiah’s discouragement turns into words of hope:
There will be times in our life when we may even come to a place of complete brokenness. We can be broken in our realization of our own sin or we may be broken emotionally or physically, feeling as though we are not able move in our own power and strength. Yet we must remember that throughout the Bible we see the way God used broken people for a greater plan. David, Elijah, Jeremiah, Peter, and Paul, to name but a few, all experienced crushing low points. When we are broken and struggling, we begin to look upward and see our need for God. In Psalms, we read, “He [the Lord] heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” Through our poverty and brokenness, God gently begins a cleansing process, and he lovingly puts us back together again. Admitting that we are hurting and need help takes courage, but it also leads to restoration. We don’t need to wear an “I’m Invincible” badge. Let’s be honest with how we feel and not try to candy-coat our situation or ignore our emotions. We can be authentic and real as well as courageous and strong. Cry if you need to. Find solace in God’s Word, in prayer, in journaling, and in talking with a friend, a mentor, or a counselor. Don’t try to hide your pain just because you want to give a tough-girl, I-can-handle-it image. Now I do want to distinguish between being honest with your hurts and being a person who is continually whining and complaining about her circumstances. There is a big difference! Grumbling goes beyond telling someone about your disappointment; it moves into the category of actively and angrily retelling your story over and over again. It may include a good measure of self-pity as well, which is quite unbecoming of any woman. Helen Keller said, “Self-pity is our worst enemy and if we yield to it, we can never do anything wise in this world.” Blind and deaf since early childhood, if anyone had an excuse to whine and complain, it was Helen Keller; yet she chose to see a life of possibilities despite her physical disabilities. Let’s decide to steer clear of whining, complaining, and self-pity, yet on the other hand, let’s not ignore the sadness we feel. The important thing is to identify our sorrow and then begin moving forward. Grieve,
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“The thought of my suffering and homelessness is bitter beyond words. I will never forget this awful time, as I grieve over my loss. Yet I still dare to hope when I remember this: The faithful love of the LORD never ends! His mercies never cease. Great is his faitthfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning. I say to myself, “The LORD is my inheritance; therefore, I will hope in him!” The LORD is good to those who depend on him, to those who search for him. So it is good to wait quietly for salvation from the LORD.” Will you dare to hope as Jeremiah did? As he grieved his loss, he also declared, “The faithful love of the LORD never ends!” Yes, His mercy is new and fresh each morning. My friend, as you walk through the difficult roads of life, seek God’s goodness and mercy along the way. Cry out to him for help and trust his faithfulness to get you through one day at a time. A portion of this article comes from Karol’s book, Thrive, Don’t Simply Survive. Known as the Positive Lady, Karol Ladd is the best-selling author of over 30 books including Positive Life Principles for Women and Unfailing Love. She is a gifted Bible teacher, passionate speaker, and joyfully devoted wife and mother. For daily doses of encouragement go to www.PositiveLifePrinciples.com.
Unexpected Blessings
My Angel by Kristina Johnson photo design by Scott
Wallace
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W
hen I was eight months pregnant with our first child, I felt a fear that no mother ever wishes to feel. My baby wasn’t moving. With a slight twinge of terror creeping into my heart, my husband Johnnie and I made our way to the hospital to hopefully ease our fears. Jokingly, Johnnie said to me on the way, “We might have her tonight.” Upon arrival, we were told that our little girl was in distress and needed to be delivered immediately. As if the potential harm to my child was not enough to break my heart, the stress and anxiety of the situation overwhelmed me when I was told my husband would be unable to stay with me through the emergency c-section delivery of our baby. This news delivered a crushing reality of the severity of the situation to me. Within minutes, our daughter Angela Maria (Angel) was born. Life was forever changed.
definition of perseverance and have had the blessing of feeling the Lord’s hand over our sweet family.
Romans 5: 3-5 More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us. no more suffering
after the birth Not breathing at birth, Angel was resuscitated by the doctors and then rushed to another hospital close by that had a Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU). My heart still breaks at the emptiness and loneliness my husband and I felt that night. Our arms ached to hold our baby girl and our hearts were heavy with the uncertainty of her fate. After Angel had been in the NICU for two days the doctors realized she had suffered brain damage and they consulted a neurologist. It was at that time we were told our daughter had suffered an acute lack of oxygen and had been diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy. The neurologist told us she would likely die in the NICU due to the severity of her condition. My comeback? “He doesn’t know what he is talking about. He is not God.” I repeated this statement to my husband after every follow-up visit with the neurologist for the following three years.
I would love to say that the Lord healed Angel and she is physically with us today; however, that is not the case. God called her home when she was three years and two months old. We had started grieving Angel’s death long before she ever physically left us. Remember, we were told she would likely not survive to get out of the NICU. The Lord was so good to us! He allowed us both to be with Angel in our home when she took her final breath. No words can explain the peace that Johnnie and I felt in that moment. We knew in that instant she would never physically suffer again. Selfishly, we did not want her to die; however the Lord had even bigger plans for her.
Philippians 1:6 And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.
realization sets in Wow, what a slap in the face! Married only four years and naïve in our younger years, we thought we had planned things “just right” – down to even the perfect baby girl detail.
As hard as it was, we let her go. We mourned. We cried. We struggled with thoughts of having more children, not wanting to seem like we were attempting to replace her. Through it all, God comforted us.
After the initial shock of the news, Johnnie and I felt reassured that the Lord had a plan for us and our beautiful Angel. After one month in the NICU, you would have been hard-pressed to find prouder parents as we prepared to bring our first baby home.
Matthew 5:4 Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.
Life was not easy. Our daughter would never be able to suck a bottle, eat foods, support her head, blink her eyes, talk, or any of the things you and I take for granted every day of our lives. Hospital visits were the norm. Complications were expected and landed us in Pediatric ICU (PICU) several times. We even had the scary need to resuscitate her at our home. Because of Angel’s need for constant medical attention, I was unable to continue working, which led to financial issues on top of everything else. Blessed with a multitude of loving friends and family who longed to help, we still found ourselves overwhelmed with her needs. We couldn’t even go to church because there was no way to leave her in the nursery. Throughout all of this, maybe even because of it, we learned the
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healing hands, healing hearts God eventually led me to go back to college to become a nurse. I had been told multiple times, “ You should be a nurse; you could do that with all the things you did for your daughter.” I truly had no desire to be a nurse. What I did have a desire for was to be used by God to witness to other parents going through similar trials that we endured. The best way to do that was to become a nurse and work in the Neonatal ICU, and thru God’s help, I did just that. I later went to work in the Pediatric ICU, even though I had stated on occasion, “I will never work in the PICU. That hits way too close to home.” I felt that the NICU was the good side since we got to bring our
baby home from there. The PICU was considered the bad side because we took Angel there each time she was near death. However, the Lord said “Go,” so I went. Then He led me to be a hospice nurse which is where I serve now. I feel honored to be a part of people’s lives during such an intimate time. I believe God has a mission field for all His followers. You just have to open your heart and eyes and wherever He has you in this moment is your mission field.
going along for the journey
Acts 1:8 But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you, and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the end of the earth. The Lord brought me along for the journey. He already had a plan; I just had to be an open vessel. Through Angel’s life and death, God has opened door after door for Johnnie and me to witness to people both young and old. Though we are unsure of what our future holds, it’s so good to know our Lord holds it in His hands; we just have to trust Him. I have heard time after time, “I don’t know how you could go on after losing a child.” Well, my response to that is that she never belonged to me anyway. The Lord just entrusted me with her care while she was here. Another thing I have heard time after time is, “I’m so sorry for your loss.” My response to that is, “Don’t be.” I could never have imagined my life without her even with the trials and heartaches we’ve endured. I wouldn’t be the person I am today and rely on the Lord as I do if it weren’t for our journey. I am blessed beyond measure. I have a God that loves me more than I can ever imagine and I know He loves Angel more than I could ever love her. I also know that through Angel’s life and death, He has and will continue to complete His work through her. I believe the Lord knew long before Johnnie and I ever had our first date back in high school that He was preparing us for this journey. We just had to accept it and allow Him to use us. We have since been blessed with two sons, each of them having their own correctable medical problems early on. I believe each of these experiences is God’s way of reminding us that all of our children belong to Him.
Psalms 127:3 Sons are a heritage from the Lord, children a reward from Him.
Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. James 1:2-4
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Real Purpose
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}
We hold a treasure that demands to be shared. It's a beautiful story of being rescued from this world, of being saved for a far better place to come. This treasure gives each of us a specific purpose, a purpose of opening up our hearts to share the hope and life we have found in our Savior. It reveals a purpose of showing with our very lives, in our jobs, and throughout our communities the sweet message of healing and restoration. It gifts us the opportunity to live out this message ourselves so that others may not just hear but see its power. And it shows us that by doing so, both our lives and theirs will be transformed both by and for His glory.
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The Least of These
By Christina Stolaas
I
magine having to wear the same dirty clothes that you discarded yesterday. Imagine wondering how you would be able to wash your clothes or even your kids’ clothes for that matter. There are some practical things in life that many of us take for granted — running water, electricity, appliances and such. What about the people who don’t have any of that? Believe it or not, it doesn’t take travelling to a third-world country to find people in need of the basics like washing clothes. You can start looking in your own back yard…downtown. And that’s just what this ministry does. If you are looking for a ministry that is real and doesn’t shy away when the things in life get dirty, I’d like to introduce you to Loads of Love. Loads of Love is based in Huntsville, Alabama that pragmatically delivers the love of Jesus to those struggling in many different ways by helping them meet the basic need of having clean clothes. Although providing the physical need for these struggling individuals is crucial, those serving with Loads of Love have discovered that an ear willing to listen, a friend ready to pray, and a heart eager to express love despite someone’s past and/or present is equally necessary. Volunteers meet the first Saturday of each month at the Five Points Laundromat to provide laundry services and food.
touching lives and hearts
The volunteers at Loads of Love develop friendships with those that regularly attend each month. When the opportunity presents itself, they readily share the hope and love of Jesus to those who are hurting
and searching.
the gentle touch Chris and Vickie Gentle are two of the many volunteers who faithfully give of their time and resources for this self-funded ministry. The Gentles share, “This is an opportunity to love on people who just need to know that someone cares.” The volunteers at Loads of Love develop friendships with those that regularly attend each month. When the opportunity presents itself, they readily share the hope and love of Jesus to those who are hurting and searching. The first time Vickie was invited to help at Loads of Love by a friend, she turned the opportunity down. Eventually she attended, but it was with great reluctance and with a bit of kicking and screaming. Vickie states, “It is now one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. I am blessed with every visit. I think about my new friends often, and pray for them regularly.”
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Loads of Love isn’t just for the homeless. The ministry also serves those down on their luck, those that are the hungry, those living in Section 8 housing, low income families, and more. Chris and Vickie shared about a man diagnosed with cancer who visits regularly. Even though he has a tumor on his side, he walks miles from his apartment to reach Five Points for food and the opportunity to have his clothes washed and dried. They also spoke of a woman that seems to be filled with a great anger. In the beginning, this lady did not want to be touched or even prayed for, but many months later Chris and Vickie were shocked to see that the lady was allowing one of the volunteers to pray over her. Although faced with many roadblocks, the Loads of Love ministry team is still able to show love to all who come by serving and meeting this important physical need.
the many who care Loads of Love accepts the help of many volunteers. Loads of Love is grateful for the help of Chick-fil-A, Gigi’s cupcakes, and others who provide food that they are able to distribute to the needy each month. In addition to the food, a local church provides a van to transport the homeless and those who are too far away to walk to the Five Points Laundromat. The increasing need in the Huntsville area is necessitating that Loads of Love look for a second laundry location to help the many needy residents in our area. This has been a most difficult hurdle to overcome because many businesses do not want homeless people in or near to their establishments.
those that serve together... Chris and Vickie have been encouraged and their faith enriched as they have seen God provide faithfully for the ministry. Often people will come off the streets and simply drop off a bag of quarters to help them fund the washing and drying of the many loads of clothes. The couple explained that serving together in this ministry has blessed their marriage as they have grown together on a deeper level. Vickie says, “It’s another way we connect together as husband and wife.”
feel like doing a load? If you’d like to become involved in this great ministry opportunity please check out Loads of Love on their Facebook page Loads of Love: Laundry Project. They regularly need people to donate money, volunteer their time, and donate coats and food. Serving with a ministry like Loads of Love is an excellent way to create a mission-based community, one where friends serve together while serving others. And it doesn’t take a whole lot to make a big impact! For more information, email loadsoflovelaundryproject@gmail.com.
Christina is an energetic mom to four adorable young kids. In her free time she enjoys writing, training for roads races, drinking too much coffee, and passionately pursuing a deeper walk with Jesus. Through a difficult childhood she has learned to earnestly trust in the Sovereignty of God and is daily astonished that God is in the business of turning her mess into a message of hope! (Isaiah 61:3)
Sean Dunn: Interrupting the World After starting in ministry at the age of eighteen, Sean Dunn (founder of Groundwire) was a youth and college pastor blessed with many opportunities to speak to young people. In a moment of complete authenticity, Sean admits to pride in his heart of his success with ministering to young people. Certainly, he had pleased the Lord‌ Only then did God start to move him in a different direction with a whisper to his heart
asking him to compare the numbers. While he was able to speak to 150,000 kids (mainly Christian teenagers) per year, there are over thirty-three million teenagers in the United States alone who he was not able to reach.
In the face of the overwhelming disparity between the numbers of kids he spoke with compared to the number who needed to hear the good news of Jesus, his pride abandoned him and his heart broke – what more could he do?
In the face of the overwhelming disparity between the numbers of kids he spoke with compared to the number who needed to hear the good news of Jesus, his pride abandoned him and his heart broke — what more
photos provided by
Groundwire
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In need of HOPE
could he do? The question surfaced, “How do we reach those who are unreachable?” By unreachable, he meant those who are unchurched — the ones who haven’t grown up in church or who don’t feel accepted in Christian culture. Determining a way to reach the unreachable was the difficult part. The average kid will most likely not unplug his or her life simply to respond to a call to attend a conference or to hear the word of Christ. While Sean was brainstorming options of communicating with these kids, the Lord guided his thoughts to mainstream media TV, radio, podcasts, Internet, and multiple social media outlets that consume this generation. This presented a unique opportunity; Sean decided to capitalize on it. His plan? Interrupt their lives, their TV, their radio stations, and their social networks with the good news of Jesus in hopes of extending God’s love to them so as to plant seeds of hope in their lives.
the dare At the age of 14, Sean found himself sliding down a dangerous path of “good Christian sinner.” He grew up in a Christian home and knew all about Christ, but found little need for a relationship with Him. In fact, after being caught up in webs of deceit, his parents offered him a challenge: “If you want to change your heart, then read the Bible every day for three months.” His rebellious heart desired to not only take up the dare, but to increase the odds. “I’ll read it twice a day for three months, but when it doesn’t work, I am done.” Sean was certain that he would find the Bible to be
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irrelevant, difficult to understand, and boring; however, he could not resist a dare. After the three month challenge, Sean took an honest look at himself and realized that he was indeed a changed boy. It wasn’t magic and it wasn’t an overnight process, but he had grown to know Jesus in a personal way, and it began to impact his life.
new call Over time, Sean watched kids around him struggle. Depression, cutting, suicide, sexual promiscuity, insecurity, and even just common teenager angst ran rampant within and outside the church. Insecure and longing for acceptance, many worked to present a polished mask to the world in an effort to appear composed, when in reality, they were really hurting inside and had no idea who to turn to for help. Where can the hurting turn for solace? Where can people begin to see their lives change? Because of his experience of a transforming relationship with Christ, He knew that the answer is, and will always be, Jesus. Sean knew he had to interrupt the noise of the world — the noise telling kids they’re not good enough or they’re unlovable — with the news that Jesus loves them and there is transformation in a relationship with Him!
in their face Sean’s answer to the problem: get in their faces. Present the love of God. Interrupt their lives and spark their curiosity. How? He knew it would take a team. Thus, Groundwire was born. Groundwire uses aggressive ad campaigns targeted towards young
adults that meet them where they are: radio stations, mainstream TV, and cable networks. They insert snippets of hope into otherwise worldly messages that bombard youth. Groundwire directs young adults to their website, and that’s where the work begins. They invest their time and energy in these people through the help of volunteers who offer one-on-one coaching in order to touch people’s lives and lead them to a saving relationship with Jesus Christ.
she saw a commercial for Groundwire and made the phone call. That night, through the volunteer coaching, she gave her life to Christ. They connected her with a church family and helped her get the medical attention and counseling that she needed to stop drugs. Today, she is blessed and thriving in her new life.
the effect
Then there’s Britney’s story. She called in for help after hearing a commercial interrupt her radio station. She didn’t intend to seek help, but something prompted her to make that call. After sharing her background with Marie, a staff member acting as a coach, she learned about God and how He had a plan for her life and a purpose for her story. Marie led Britney to Christ that night and thirteen months later, Groundwire received a video testimony. That day thirteen months ago was potentially Britney’s last day on earth. She had planned her suicide and was on the verge of executing it in her car when she heard that commercial come on. After calling, her life had changed. God had heard her prayer and transformed her life and her heart. She now knows that she is a child of God and that He loves her very much.
Groundwire averages over 233,000 visitors on their website a month. In 2012, they hosted 38,000 conversations via chat.
get involved
Groundwire also realizes that being a newborn Christian is challenging. For the young and vulnerable Christians, there has to be a mentor willing to help them water the seeds that have just been planted. They are committed to not only initiating relationships with these young people, but also to connecting those with the resources that they need to continue to grow in Jesus. They work to guide individuals to a supportive church family that will help provide the counseling or medical resources that they might need.
More than the numbers are the stories. Two of which are especially powerful for Sean. There’s the woman in New York City who had fallen into a life of drugs after she moved there to be with her boyfriend. He had gotten her hooked, making her dependent on him and the drugs, and then he left her. Unable to support the habit that her body so desperately craved, she resorted to stripping in order to pay for her addiction. Alone in her apartment one night, desperate for something,
This sounds awesome, right? It is! And you can be a part of it through coaching or through financial donations. All of it is needed and welcomed. Our young generation is desperately searching for hope, meaning, purpose, and acceptance. We should be meeting them where they are. Join Groundwire in this revolutionary movement and impact a generation for Christ one person and one relationship at a time. Visit www.groundwire.net to find out more.
In need of CHANGE
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FEATURE
Need You Now life story shared by
Plumb
Syndrome (IBS) with a spastic colon triggered by anxiety and panic. As a high school student, she found herself medicated to the point where she had no
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all photos for this article provided by
Plumb was unable to cope on her own. She suffered from anxiety so severe that it left her crippled with debilitating stomach aches — the clinical diagnosis was Irritable Bowel
Buscuit Media Group
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ith intense pain shooting through her stomach, leaving her crumpled on the floor unable to move, Plumb cried out through the empty space, “God, I need you now!” She desperately hoped that the God of heaven was listening to her and would hear her plea for help and deliverance…
Well, everybody's got a
story
to tell
And everybody's got a wound to be healed I want to believe there's
beauty
here
'Cause oh I get so tired of holding on I can't let go, I can't move on I want to believe there's
meaning
here
from lyrics to "Need You Now" by Plumb
lyrics of the heart
used to in the life of a Christian artist, though this project was not one they would readily understand. Two days after Christmas, Plumb and her husband separated. It was a painful jolt to Plumb, who, though not naïve, had a lot of faith and trust in the marriage that they had built.
Naturally gifted with words, Plumb sought solace in her poetry and music. Growing up, her music hobby offered her an escape from the reality of struggling with her emotional and physical burdens. Although signed by a major record label before her 21st birthday, she had neither the intention of becoming a rock star nor did she have a set agenda; rather, she simply desired an outlet to express extreme emotions and felt drawn to share her own lyrics.
Trapped in a nightmare, thoughts of single parenthood, loneliness, hurt, and despair for her children swirled in her mind. Although she wanted to run from her marriage and the pain of disappointment, God used her children to ground her in the desire to try — to try to rebuild what had been shattered — to try to rebuild their family, if for only the children.
interest in school or the ability to make herself care about traditional education.
As 2011 was approaching, her career was in full swing and the single “Need You Now” that had begun as desperate cries for deliverance for one single young woman was poised to become a beautiful anthem for others to relate as their own plea for deliverance. However, in the traditional, unpredictable twists and turns of life, the song and its lyrics unexpectedly took on an entirely different meaning in her heart. Getting set to release her new album in 2011, Plumb’s world suddenly seemed to cave in on itself and teetered on the verge of crumbling, as her marriage was dealt a severe blow.
a different kind of project Plumb describes how she and her husband had to tell their children that they needed to work on a project, which was something the kids were
After some time spent reeling from the shock and pain, she heard the Lord speak to her weary and broken heart. It was time to move forward. Though unsure of what the path to reconciliation would be, the broken couple knew that they needed to start by assessing the damage and the cause. It was time to take stock. On the verge of divorce, they started to analyze how they got there.
spinning plates Upon checking the inventory of their failing marriage, one thing became painfully obvious to both of them: they had too many plates spinning in the circus of their life and the crash was inevitable. Between music industry demands, releasing a new album, kids’ activities, group functions, board memberships, club memberships, mission work, fall 2013
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managing a household, over-extended finances, and everyday life, they had lost sight of the life that God had called them to live. A longing for the simple life began to take root in their hearts. While their lives were filled with a lot of good things, the volume of those good things had become the enemy of great. The current societal attitude of “now” and “more” had invaded their home and their lives. Nothing was left unscathed. There had been nothing that they had protected from the onslaught of “now” and “more” . Laying her head on her pillow at the end of each day, God was the last thing on Plumb’s mind. If she would have taken the time to ask Him what He wanted from her, He would have simply said “slow down!” After almost destroying it all — each other, the house, their family, and their money — Plumb and her husband decided to make a change. As their project began to take shape, the path forward became clearer. They started by each taking responsibility for the failures in their marriage. Even though fingers are often pointed and blame is nearly always shifted, Plumb and her husband made an adjustment in their hearts and said, “What can I do to make this better and to make sure it never happens again?”
mapping out the journey Putting things back into balance was their next priority. Life had gotten way out of hand and neither one of them had attempted to slow it down. Instead, they had existed in disconnection. Living in disconnection, either with your spouse or with God, is where the enemy does his best work. So, the couple sat down together and mapped out what their priorities would be. They put God at the top of their list and they asked Him to be the head of their home, the healer of their hearts, and the ultimate goal in their lives. After God, they set up each other as priority number one, even ahead of the kids, because their kids actually depended on them putting each other first. Children and family time were next, followed by careers and good works. It was a start…the journey they had mapped out was one that they decided they would take together.
circles of trust It was in this phase of reconciliation and reprioritization that God used their community group to step in, support them, and hold them together while God did the repairing. He was good and faithful to answer the prayers of the embattled couple. Working in their lives and hearts and through the people He had placed in their circles of trust, God was able to mend what was broken and restore what He had united in the first place. Making decisions to forgive each other and working together with God to rebuild their home has been one of the most rewarding decisions of their lives. The first morning that Plumb and her husband woke up in their bed together, the sound of their oldest child’s voice choked up with emotion asking if the project was over and if Daddy could come back home now, penetrated their hearts. With a deep joy resonating throughout their family, the answer was a thankful “ Yes!” What the enemy intended for evil, God intended for good. By submitting to the call of God on their hearts, slowing down, and allowing Him to come in and heal their brokenness, the couple has allowed the Lord to
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build something incredible. Satan definitely did not count on the fact that God would turn what appeared to be a Titanic-sized disaster in their lives into a story filled with the glory of the Lord for the benefit of others, yet that is exactly what He did.
on the other side Today, Plumb and her husband share their story with the world in an effort to reach out to those who need to hear the hope of reconciliation that they have experienced. Not only have they been reconciled with each other, but they’ve been reconciled to God as well. Their marriage has been redeemed, and God is in the process of restoring their family. There was no magic formula though. There are still struggles and they still need God in their daily lives. Plumb describes how the reconciliation and redemption was immediate, but the process of restoration will take a lifetime — a pacing that they’re completely fine with. On the other side of separation, their marriage is better than ever. They have learned to communicate honestly and openly with each other as well as the importance of sifting out impurities from their marriage immediately instead of letting even the smallest issues fester. They have learned that each fire they enter into on one side leaves their marriage even more beautiful when they arrive on the other side. They have also emptied themselves of any pride and have asked God to use their story as He sees fit in order to bless others since He was the one who put them back together in the first place. On the anniversary of their reconciliation, Plumb’s husband surprised her with a second wedding — an intimate gathering of close friends and family meant to celebrate their triumph, reaffirm their vows to each other, and rededicate their marriage and family to God and His purpose for them.
words of advice Plumb offers the following advice for hopefully preventing a broken home in the first place, but also for repairing what might need mending while you still can:
1.
Make Christ number one. If Christ is most important, it will be reflected in your marriage and children.
2.
Find a reputable Christian marriage and family therapist who can help you, your spouse and your family make wise decisions and who can help create an atmosphere of healing.
3.
Surround yourself with a godly community group to hold you accountable — people who know you. This community needs to be people who support your marriage — not just you.
4. 5.
Live a life of simplicity. Know your priorities and live it out. Write out your schedule for each month, week, or day — and stick to it. Write down the
time for your priorities — God, spouse, children, friends, volunteering, date nights, exercise, shopping, etc… If something comes up, even good things, that you hadn’t planned on and they cut in to your priorities, then politely decline or offer a rain check.
6.
This planning can give you the freedom to say no. It offered Plumb the sense of relief from the guilt and stress she felt when it came to saying no to people. It allows her to push the unimportant tasks out of her mind and off of her heart.
7.
Say no. When you say no for the right reasons, you’re leaving a door open for someone else to walk through. Be it helping deliver food, serving in the nursery, or other good things, people will have to ask someone else for assistance. It may turn out that it would be a blessing for the other person to serve, where it would have been additional stress for you and your family.
8.
Avoid the cultural temptation to have more and do more. Slow down, have less, say no, and decide you don’t care about your worldly status, what people think of you or your things. Care more about what your God and your family think.
9.
Never lose affection for new life, new chances, simplicity, and priorities.
10.
Make choices that you might not like for yourself, knowing that they will ultimately benefit your family. For example, Plumb describes how she still struggles with her anxiety issues and has chosen to take medication to help her with emotional problems. She is a huge advocate of a natural and healthy lifestyle approach to dealing with issues, but she also remains aware of the pride associated with this. We live in a fallen world where perfection cannot be attained in reality; because of this imperfection, stress, anxiety, and depression affect her — and that’s okay. She realizes that she needs to take a step, even one she would rather not take, to prevent her issues from affecting her husband or children. “If this medicine keeps me from saying something that will hurt my family that I can’t take back, then I’ll take the medicine,” she says. This selfless choice is just one example of decisions you can make to benefit your family and all that it requires is emptying yourself of your own pride and deciding to serve your family first.
11.
Spend lives well-lived based on your goals — what is your legacy? At the end of the day, for Plumb, it’s God saying, “I’m proud of you Plumb” that she cares about. God rarely answers our pleas for His help in the time or manner that we think He should. Standing on the other side of heartbreak and physical/emotional distress, Plumb can more clearly see the path that God has taken her on. She stands ever grateful to a God who orchestrates the desires of her heart and paths of her life in ways that would ultimately glorify Him and help many.
To hear more of Plumb's heart through her songs, you can find her new album “Need You Now” at
www.plumbinfo.com. fall 2013
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Turning
Something Old intoSomething New by
H
Diane Floate
ave you ever thought one weekend could bring you a new life? For many teenagers, life is merely existing, getting through, or even thinking that life is not worth living. Life for many teens in the world around you is not filled with lollipops, ice cream cones, or even loving parents. Instead, there are young people that walk by you every day on the street, sit next to you in church, or visit your home with your son or daughter that simply struggle to survive. For them, their daily lives are filled with all sorts of threatening, fearful circumstances including cruelty from the very ones that should love and protect them the most in this world — their parents. These kids turn to drugs, cutting (a new form of self-inflicted harm that helps teen release emotion whether it be a sense of anxiety, anger, sense of hopelessness, etc.), harming others, or in some extreme cases murder. What is a teen to do when their world spins out of control like a tilt-a-world that never comes to a stop? Who can they go to when there is no one they trust enough to confide in? Who will step in and offer them hope in their life of chaos?
new life Let me introduce you to a non-profit organization that reaches out to teens from all walks of life — Vida Nueva (VN), a Spanish name which means New Life. Teens that attend come from different backgrounds — some are from encouraging and loving homes while others are from hostile and unloving homes. VN is designed to provide an opportunity for all teens willing to step outside of their “normal” lives to attend a
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weekend created to help them discover the most life-altering encounter with the most loving Man that ever walked this earth — Jesus Christ. He is the only true source of hope that can offer them the light they need in their darkest circumstances. He is the only source of never-ending peace and joy that can accompany them through whatever valley they may be asked to travel.
silence the noise VN is a sequestered experience in which the teens (ages fifteen to twenty) are isolated from the outside world for an entire weekend. Connie Sides, an avid volunteer, describes the sequestration in these words, “Our daily lives offer so many distractions from being able to just focus on Christ and hear from Him. By sequestering the weekends and not allowing anyone to come and go, to watch TV, or to access their cell phones, it helps both the team members that are serving and the candidates that are attending to be able to just focus on Christ’s message for them in that moment. Everyone needs a break from the world and the stresses in it. Sometimes you just can’t think with all the ‘noise’ in the world and it helps to get away and just be still and listen.”
memories Connie and her husband Chris are two of hundreds of volunteers that give of their own personal time to attend VN and pour into the lives and hearts of all these teens. In fact, these volunteers pay to serve.
It takes 110 to 120 volunteers to ensure that each weekend occurs. Remembering back Connie thought of one of her favorite memories about VN — overhearing some of the participating candidates one weekend talking about the team “having to serve them.” She shares, “This was so special to me because I realized that their perception wasn’t one of ‘they had to pay,’ but that they ‘paid to serve ME.’ They started to see that they were valuable. Not that we just told them how valuable they are to Christ, but they understood they are valuable to their peers as well. We all have a desire to be loved. And knowing that others sacrifice their time and resources to ensure that you know that you are loved is something that cannot be measured. There is something very precious and rare in seeing others with a servant’s heart. It’s humbling. It’s motivating. It’s contagious!”
decorations, gifts, sponsoring candidates to attend, and much more. To make sure each VN weekend is a success, they have several volunteers who help raise monetary support by doing fundraisers. One such fundraiser is coming this fall on October 11 at the Birmingham Jefferson Convention Complex. The main attraction will be several family members of Duck Dynasty — a reality-based A&E show displaying the lives of the Robertson Clan who made it rich with their duck call and who love and serve the Lord with their whole hearts.
making a weekend a reality
the embrace of one
VN hosts four weekends a year — one for boys and one for girls. It costs eighty dollars to attend one of these weekends; however, no teen who has a desire to come will be turned away. VN will search high and low for sponsors to make these weekends a reality for a desiring teenager.
Never underestimate the power of reaching out into the lives of teenagers. You may be the only one who will take the time to point them to the hope, peace, and love that only the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ can offer. To close with significant words from Connie, “…the
To become a candidate for VN, a teen must be sponsored by a previous attendee from either VN, Tres Dias (adult version of VN), or a Cursillotype weekend. These organizations are all closely related by how they orchestrate the events and purpose of the weekends. Their central purpose is to provide the attendee a deeper sense of who Christ is and His love for them. It takes money to make an experience like VN happen: venue, food,
If you are a teen that would like to attend VN or if you know of a teen that might benefit by attending a weekend such as VN then all you have to do is visit their website: www.bhamvn.org. VN also has a Facebook page that you can visit. It is Vida Nueva Birmingham Events.
majority of teens [attending VN] come hurting with scars that are often times leaving them in a place of feeling as though God’s grace could never extend far enough to reach them.” We must become the arms of Jesus embracing these hurting teens with His love. What will you do to embrace the world around you with the pure and radiant love of Jesus Christ? fall 2013
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Community Life
ministering to the wounded
For we are God's handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. Ephesians 2:10 by
Rachael Jackson
T
here’s a little yellow house right off of Highway 31. Blink and you’ll miss it. But walk inside, and you’ll feel at home. Welcome to Dayspring Christian Counseling Center in Owens Crossroads, Alabama. Leah Lucas and Lindsay Taylor are two sisters who look nothing alike yet share a common passion for helping people. They especially want to help people who need it the most: those who believe they’re completely out of options. Their story is an amazing testimony to the sovereign goodness of God in all situations and how He has created us, personally, for the purpose of glorifying Him. In fact, Lindsay wouldn’t even be here if her parents’ original plan had worked out how they expected. You see, she is the third child of parents who were completely satisfied with two children. However, Lindsay’s brother passed away at the
age of two, succumbing to his battle with Leukemia. Through their heartbreak, her parents turned their pain over to the Lord and asked for healing. After time, with a desire for two children still planted in their hearts, God gave them their baby girl Lindsay. Growing up, her parents would often tell her the story of her amazing older brother. They told her of the great necessity for people who are willing to help hurting people. And they never ceased to remind her that she had been specially created for an incredible purpose. As a teenager, Lindsay realized what that incredible purpose was when her heart became set on Christian counseling. She had a heart for listening to people and the gift of discernment — able to really get to the root of the symptoms that manifested in people’s lives. Her sister Leah had the same passion and they grew up sharing dreams of working together in their own private practice. fall 2013
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Both sisters pursued their counseling degrees, taking different paths of specialization but ending up at the same conclusion: private practice was not where God wanted them. Leah’s experience with the Department of Human Resources (DHR) convinced her of the overwhelming need of help for low-income families. However, Lindsay through her internship in pursuit of her degree decided that her heart was really just in helping people — not making the money. Through these experiences, God was clearly directing them toward the mission field. He wanted them in the trenches — not on the sidelines — ministering to the wounded right where they were.
and so, dayspring.
they
who can get help?
Dayspring wants to help people find their mission in life and then equip them to move forward and accomplish the great things that God has placed their hearts. They especially want to see people freed from the burdens of their past.
found
Dayspring was founded by Terry Nelson (along with two other cofounders) who left a thriving private practice after receiving a call on his life to start this non-profit. Following God’s lead and unsure where it would take him or how it would be accomplished, out of faith he started knocking on doors and having conversations. Before he knew it, several churches and a few private donors had set him up with enough money to open Dayspring. “We are here to help overwhelmed pastors,” explains Terry. Let’s face it. Pastors can get overwhelmed at times with the number of people in their churches who need help. Dayspring aims to be a resource for these pastors by becoming a reference for their church members. They are also there to help parents or anyone else that might need some outside help. The services are affordable. They take insurance, but if you don’t have insurance, Terry insists that “ [they] will never turn anyone away because of an inability to pay.” However, they want people to be invested in their counseling process. So, they’ll ask them to honestly evaluate their priorities and name a price that they’re able to pay. If it’s five dollars, then they will work with that. It’s been a difficult road to keep the counseling centers open. When money gets tight and donations stop coming in, Terry prays that God would keep their doors open. To explain God’s faithfulness, he described a month where they were short a large sum of money. Coming to the end of his rope and having no more ideas, Terry simply prayed. As he walked into a meeting later that day, one of the attendees handed him an envelope. Not thinking anything of it, he casually opened the envelope and was shocked to see the exact amount (unsolicited) written on the check. Praise God! He keeps our doors open.
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Counseling is a valuable tool that is often looked down on by people because they claim it’s “not for them.” For some, it’s pride that keeps them from seeking help. For others, it might be finances. Whatever it is, the doors of Dayspring are always open for anyone and everyone. Christian or non-Christian, adolescent or adult, married or single, male or female — this is a resource that is open to you. Whether you’ve suffered from trauma, abuse, anxiety, or depression or whether you need an outside perspective, counseling can be thought of as a resource to help you achieve your goal.
Dayspring’s goal is to help people find the healthy balance between the dichotomy of pills and prayer in today’s world. On one hand, you have the people — doctors included — who think that pills are the answer while, on the other hand, you have people who insist that through faith and prayer you should be able to overcome everything. Dayspring believes that the truth lies in the middle somewhere. Sometimes we need a little help in getting to the point where we can effectively deal with our problems so we can move forward in life. Dayspring wants to help people find their mission in life and then equip them to move forward and accomplish the great things that God has placed their hearts. They especially want to see people freed from the burdens of their past.
how can we help? The center wants to expand. They want to reach people and become a healthy and stable non-profit resource. But in order to do that, they need prayer and financial support. They also need your assistance with publicizing their services and spreading the word that they are available to help anyone. They have fundraisers throughout the year, but you can also donate any time. Most importantly, they want referrals — they want to be used how God intended them to be used. You can help today by going to their website www.dayspringcc.us/support.htm and pledging your support in the form of prayer or funding. Being in the trenches and talking with and counseling the hurting is such a tremendous calling on one’s life. Not all of us are called to do that. I am so honored that we can shed some light on those who need Godly counseling and share the good news that there is a Hope and a Helper for them.
Sparks -----------are---------FlyIng by
L
Bonnie Dannelly
ynn Gill has a calling on her life. It is to serve others in tangible ways and see others blessed by God’s glory. After moving to Huntsville, Alabama, from California for the management position at Madison Park apartments, Lynn knew that God was relocating her for a bigger reason than just work. She knew she was being called to Huntsville for a specific cause. She just didn’t quite know what it was yet.
the spark that lit the fire Years earlier, Lynn’s son was engaged to a beautiful woman named Serena. Serena had cystic fibrosis and struggled with her health. This didn’t stop her son from loving this woman; they became engaged. After months of health struggles, Serena told her fiancé that she’d always wanted to go to the Dream Center to serve as a volunteer but she passed away before she could see this dream made a reality.
team serena
visit their website at www.dreamcenter.org.) Lynn decided to join Dream Team Serena and that is where she got her first taste of serving her community and helping others in need. This sparked a desire for her to continue to reach out to her own community for the Gospel.
jumping into action During the holidays of 2012, Lynn decided to launch her apartment complex into a mission of giving back to their community. She chose the Manna House of Huntsville, a non-profit organization that provides food assistance and more to those in need. The association for the apartments Lynn manages decided to hold a contest to see which apartment complex could raise the most money for the Manna House. Through Lynn’s efforts and passion, the residents of her complex were energized and began to give increasingly to the fundraising efforts. Lynn’s Madison Park Apartments won the contest.
When Lynn talked with Fran Fluher, Lynn’s son wanted to honor his fiancé’s photo provided by Lynn Gill founder of the Manna House, one of Fran’s desire to become a volunteer with the remarks was that the Manna House could Dream Center by creating Team Serena. serve the community better if people would give generously year round This team would join the mission of the Dream Center in reaching out to a variety of people in need through its many programs such as (not just during the holiday season). The lack of generous donations hunger relief, residential rehabilitation, foster care, and even human throughout the year causes the Manna House to run low on items. In trafficking to name only a few. (To learn more about the Dream Center, fact, Fran said many times they have empty shelves and, despite their fall 2013
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desire to give, they have had to turn people away because they did not have what the person needed.
team to pack bags for these children on Wednesdays from 2:30 p.m. to 6:30 p.m.
A light bulb went off in Lynn’s head. What if she could get her apartment complex to play an integral role in helping the needs of Manna House throughout the year? She began to offer opportunities for her residents to donate to the Manna House at special events the complex sponsored. Lynn reports that through these events and the impact they have made on the community, the residents have grown to love the act of giving as much as she does.
One Harvest Food Ministries provides an opportunity to buy great quality groceries at a wonderful price and support a ministry at the same time. Boxes are distributed monthly and can be ordered on their website at www.oneharvest.com.
Not only do they now support the Manna House, but they have also started a “Spring Cleaning” team. Members of this team walk alongside the roads and streets of their community picking up litter that lines the roadways and ditches. They want to care not only for the people of the community but also for the world around them that God has blessed them with. Lynn wants to get other apartment complexes in their community involved in their year-round outreach opportunities. She said it isn’t the bottom dollar that matters since they are rival apartment complexes in the business world, but what matters most is that they give back to the community. The world is a better place because of people like Lynn Gil that chooses to simply look around them, reach out their hand and their hearts, and share the love of Christ to those who need it most.
Mom-to-Mom is a local ministry that provides diapers, wipes, clothing, equipment, and lots of love to expectant mothers, new moms, and preschool moms. Phone support is also available 24/7.
“Someone has to light the fire, and others have to keep throwing wood on the fire.”
God's Garden is a seasonal ministry that operates Monday through Saturday from 5 a.m. until the work is done. Volunteers show up to help plant, weed, and harvest fresh vegetables from the garden for families in need. You can call 256-653-7883 for further details and directions. Back to School is a program that assists parents in providing school supplies and backpacks for their children as they enter the new school year.
Thanksgiving Blessing provides families with food for Thanksgiving Dinner. Christmas Blessing provides children with a toy, a book, and a stuffed animal as Christmas gifts of love.
about the manna house The Manna House is open on Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday evenings from 4 p.m. to 7 p.m., closing only for major holidays or severe weather. Anyone in need is welcome at the Manna House. Volunteers are greatly appreciated and you don’t even have to sign up. Just show up anytime between 2 p.m. and 7 p.m. They will gladly put you to work. The Manna House has many other programs: P.E.R.K.S. (Personal Emergency Resources for Kids in School) is one such program. This program provides snacks and ready-to-eat foods for elementary school children that lack adequate food supplies on the weekend. Sponsoring a child in this program is only $14 a month. You can also give of your time by getting together with the P.E.R.K.S.
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Volunteers for any of these programs are always needed and appreciated. Children ages four and up are welcome to serve. Stay only as long as your feet, back, or children can endure. You may drop in when you are available and leave when you need to. There is no need to sign up. Just show up and you’ll be put to work! You can contact the Manna House at 256-653-7883 or drop by at 2110 South Memorial Parkway, Huntsville, AL 35801. As Lynn says, “Someone has to light the fire, and others have to keep throwing wood on the fire.” We all have a role to play. Do you want to be someone who lights the fire or someone who keeps throwing wood on the fire to carry God’s love to the community around you?
Go & Tell
The Well currently serves out of a middle school in Boulder. Last Easter, The Well held a church service here at The Bandshell in downtown Boulder.
Growing Boulder in God by
Bonnie Dannelly Dannelly
photos provided by Lee
M
y husband and I have been involved in ministry, primarily youth ministry, since we’ve married. In 2010, with a great stirring in our hearts, we felt God calling us to begin a church plant. We were very involved in our home church at this time with most of our energy going towards youth ministry. We felt we were where God would have us; therefore, the thought of change was a shock. We did not know how this transition would transpire, we only knew that if God was calling us to it, he would take care of the details. And so our journey began. Little did we know where it would take us, but we did know that He would be faithful to provide. God’s provision and direction in our calling began with a family who had a strong desire to church plant in Boulder, Colorado. Through our common call of church planting, we became instantaneous friends.
It was effortless and easy. As our friendship grew, the future began to make sense. We started meeting with this couple once a week to pray with each other and encourage one another. One night after they left our house, something inexplicable came over me — an overwhelming sense of clarity. At that moment, I knew that Boulder was our future mission field.
a giant step In anticipation to move forward, my husband and I started meeting with the elders of our church where we were employed for prayer over this giant step in our lives. We started to put things in order for our big move across the country. With a 1,200 mile separation from everything we held dear — our friends, our family, our church, our comfort, and our home — we had a lot of planning in front of us. With this new fall 2013
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chapter, unpaved road, and nothing but obedience to guide our family, we felt giddy with overwhelming excitement. Following God into the unknown has inexplicable ways of spicing life up and deepening the entire meaning of your existence. As in all things that God calls us to and in most paths that we take in His name, things rarely happen how or when we think they should. It also is usually never easy; however, God has and will always be faithful to equip, sustain, and ultimately use what we offer Him for His glory.
come and get their pictures taken for free. We put out silly props and hats for them to use — it was a blast, and it offered us an opportunity to just talk with the locals. We were able to have casual yet genuine conversations with them and introduce them to our Lord through our kind gestures of free activities.
care to share We have also been able to share Jesus with a lot of hurting people. Shortly after we arrived we met a family, that are good friends of ours
“Following God into the unknown has inexplicable ways of spicing life up and deepening the entire meaning of your existence.”
Through our missional community group from church, we were able to share our hearts about church planting in Boulder and were blessed by their love and support. Several gave financially and one couple even told us they wanted to go with us. It was incredible to see God align the hearts of others with ours and we felt extremely blessed to have good friends and fellow believers with us on our quest into the unknown.
diving in... Upon landing in Boulder, we dove right in to our community - meeting neighbors, school friends, and others from sporting events. We began having anyone and everyone over to our house for block parties, cookouts, and game nights in an effort to begin creating relationships that could ultimately lead to gospel conversations. In the summer of 2012, we were able to participate in the annual downtown street fair. It was an every-Friday-night commitment for 10 weeks straight. We met hundreds of people and exposed many to the gospel simply by our presence. We set up a photo booth where families and friends could
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now, who had just lost a baby due to birth complications. Their son lived for three months and passed away one month before we arrived in Colorado. We are so grateful that we have been here to pour God’s love on this family. I was able to share Christ with a self-proclaimed psychic who practically forced herself into our lives when she came flying past our house and accidentally ran over our family dog. Our dog recovered and is doing great but what the enemy intended for harm resulted in a planted seed in this woman’s life. God prevails in darkness! Six months ago a friend and classmate of my daughter died unexpectedly in her sleep. Sweet Nicole was only nine years old. Her father is the music teacher at my children’s school and my daughter’s soccer coach. As he suffered through his loss, our missional community got together and decided we needed to share Jesus with him in a practical way. I had my father, who is a gifted artist, paint a portrait of Nicole and her father
on a canvas. Once it arrived, we had it framed. We had Nicole’s dad over to give it to him. He was moved beyond words. These things are just small examples of what God has enabled us to do through His provision and guidance. God knows what our mission in being here is and He knows who needs healing, restoration, and ultimately salvation. We have been so blessed in our obedience to move here and continue to remain excited about the opportunities that God has for us on this gospel-sharing adventure.
great adventures You can join in on exciting adventures for God as well! Everyone is called somewhere. It may be overseas, across the country, or even in your current neighborhood. I would challenge you to ask God where you are called to be. Some relocate and some help fund the mission, but both are missionaries. What are you called to do? Over the last several months we have joined efforts with another local church plant. By merging our churches we now have more people to do the things that God has called us both to do. It’s still hard, but we are resting in knowing that God is always faithful. It takes approximately five to seven years in the Boulder area for a new church to become self-sufficient. This is a tough environment to share the love of Christ — the ground needs cultivating. People desperately need Jesus. Most people in Boulder County fall into two extremes — hardened to all faiths or open to every religion. As they see it, “all religions lead to God.” We are called to change this. We cannot do this alone. We need people willing to serve and willing to get their hands dirty for the kingdom of God. We need finances and resources. We need people willing to stretch their faith and their wallets for growing ministry. We especially need prayer. When you step out in faith and obey the calling of God, the enemy is ready to attack; we can use all the prayer that we can get! We are on a long term mission to reach this city for God’s glory — no short term trip here. Planting this church is our life, our mission, and our ultimate goal. We welcome others joining with us.
To find out more about The Well Church in Boulder, Colorado, visit www.boulderwell.org. Keep up with the Dannelly’s at www.dannellyfamily.com. fall 2013
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Rwanda: by
Wendy McGee
Photography this page provided by: Bailey Vinson Bottom photo and right page photos provided by: Wendy McGee
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n a Sunday morning in the summer of 2008, a team from my home church shared about their recent mission trip to Rwanda with e3 (equip…evangelize…establish) Partners ministry. I listened to their stories and saw their pictures — the dusty children in rags with grins a mile wide, the women with baskets on their heads, the mud huts — and I felt a tug. Something struck a chord with me. I thought to myself, “Maybe one day I’ll go.” I felt like I had just reached a point where I could stand on my own two feet. The death of a dear friend, the tragic loss of my mother to pancreatic cancer, and a recent divorce had left me feeling like a survivor at best. I was exhausted, in need of healing, and was looking for stability, routine, and consistency. The thought of being a minister or missionary in any sense of the word was out of the question. I wasn’t strong; I wasn’t spiritual. How could I possibly do anything great for God? A friend introduced me to Mike and Mary Wagner, e3 Partner leaders for Rwanda and members of my home church Summit Crossing. Again I thought, “One day...” But still, the faint tug to go to Rwanda would not go away. It was growing. I remember talking to the Lord about this while getting ready at the bathroom mirror one morning. He gently whispered to me, “Walk through this door and I will take you the rest of the way.” My knees hit the floor as I came undone. I began weeping at the humbling fact that God wanted to use a mess like me. Questions immediately came to mind like, “How will I ever raise enough support?” and “Who will get my daughter to school?” The invasive questions endlessly popped up one after the other. Each question and objection
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was more stressful and confusing than the last: logistics, finances, health, safety, etc. Finally, I said, “ Yes, I’ll go. Lord, you can work it out.” The first step of faith was to apply for the trip on the e3partners website (www.e3Partners.org). The amount of money I would need to raise was approximately four thousand dollars. Although it was extremely hard to ask for financial support, the funds came in steadily — just enough and right on time. Feeling smaller and smaller with each donation, it became clear God had not and would not leave alone me in this. I received tremendous encouragement from my prayer team of family and church friends.
One of the prerequisites for going on the trip was to type up a personal testimony. That was a big challenge. To me, my testimony is not at all exciting or victorious. How would I ever connect to the Rwandan people who had suffered through mass genocide in 1994? How could I offer any amount of condolence or understanding to the people of Rwanda with my simple testimony. Virtually every adult in Rwanda has been affected by the genocide and, in many cases, continues to be affected. Most have lost a family member, neighbor, or friend. For others, someone close to them participated in the murders. Alcoholism is common among the men, who many times leave their wives with the burden of providing for their children. A single mother in Rwanda has no legal rights to child
And so, through my translators, I began: “I’m here from America to tell the people in your village about how to know God. I manage a household. I work to provide for myself and my daughter. I do not have a husband and was worried about whether I could do all this by myself. Because I believed the Word of God, I have the peace of knowing that God will take care of me and my family.” One of the women looked me in the eye and said, “ You are just like me.” The others nodded in agreement. The door for sharing Christ was wide open. The ladies gave their hearts to Jesus and pointed the way up the hill to another family that needed to hear the gospel. Since 2009, I have taken three e3 trips to Rwanda. It doesn’t take someone who has it all figured out to respond to God’s call. It doesn’t
There is someone who needs to hear your story. Not in spite of, but because of your life circumstances and heartaches, you are perfectly positioned to tell it, and God will receive the glory for your obedience. support or aid. Moreover, if their husband happens to be in prison, they are responsible for providing meals for their spouse. The genocide, while thankfully over, has produced damage beyond repairs of just men and women. Jesus is needed in these beautiful hills. I remember expressing to Mary Wagner my concern over writing a simple testimony. She reminded me that Revelation 12:11 states, “And they overcame him [the devil] by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony; and they loved not their lives unto the death.” Never had I considered that my testimony was a weapon to overcome the power of the enemy. I realized that speaking one’s story of coming to Christ or speaking aloud what the Word says about salvation is truly a weapon against the enemy. My personal testimony is exactly what opened the door for sharing the gospel with my beloved Rwandans. Even though I remained skeptical about whether a person in Africa would want to hear what I had to say, I was incredibly blessed to see God’s hand at work. After telling Him, “Lord, I have absolutely no idea what to say to these women. Why would they want to listen to me?” He gently whispered, “Tell your story.”
necessarily take flying to Africa to be obedient. It doesn’t take an eloquent speaker to tell the story of God’s love. Even our feelings of unworthiness cannot stop the Word of God from accomplishing His purposes. There is someone who needs to hear your story. Not in spite of, but because of your life circumstances and heartaches, you are perfectly positioned to tell it, and God will receive the glory for your obedience. Wendy McGee is the owner/director of Providence Music in Huntsville, AL, offering classes and lessons in piano, voice, guitar, and saxophone. Wendy is a conference and workshop speaker in the areas of music and worship. She has a bachelors degree in professional writing from the University of North Alabama, and bachelors and masters degrees in music from Wichita State University. She has served as a short-term missionary in the countries of Costa Rica and Rwanda. Wendy plays saxophone in the Moondust jazz band and enjoys watching “Dr. Who” with family and friends. She is married to Drew McGee and is mom to Victoria, age 15 and step-mom to Andrew, 21; Katelyn, 19; Nathan, 17; and Cara, 13. Check out her studio Providence Music at www. ProvidenceMusicStudio.com. fall 2013
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All We Say & Do
In the Potter’s Hands by
Morgan Knight
“W
e may not be millionaires but the people that we have met along the way -- that we’ve been able to encourage and pray with at the counter-- it’s great,” says Alex Handley of Pottery by You located in Madison, Alabama. The Handleys have a heart for both God and others that is has inspired not only myself, but so many people they have encountered through running a business that has it’s foundation in Jesus Christ. Through a story that in itself could fill up many an article, the Handley’s moved to Huntsville from St. Louis after Leah and her husband split. They stayed here with her sister until they found a place of their own. Though they didn’t have a lot of physical possession, there was a Peace in their home that filled those empty spaces. Lauren, a graphic design student, and Alex, who works at Pottery by You full time, have been alongside Leah every step of the way after she acquired the business from partnering with a friend. Together, they run their business by putting people first. Leah, Alex, and Lauren have a heart to love and bless others, because to them it’s less about the business and more about the people.
opening doors “Being kind and patient, having a loving spirit towards people... making that atmosphere, the music we play... it opens people up to a place where people can see God,” says Lauren when asked about what influence she wants their pottery shop to have on the community and customers. “I remember one time I had Francesca Battistelli playing, a lady and her daughter were listening to the words and the mom asked ‘Who is that?’
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I was able to share with her what the song was about. As she walked out the door, I felt the Lord saying ‘give her the CD’ and I said ‘Man, what?! I just got it!’,” Lauren said, laughing. “Then I realized that I had two of the same one! So I ran down the breezeway and I gave her one... You never know what can open up when you do stuff like that.” The Handleys have had many encounters with people both in their store and at offsite events where they sell jewelry and paintings. When you live your life seeking God’s heart, people can see a difference. “I think that sometimes people can pick up if you’re a Christian or not,” says Alex. “People will come in and say, ‘Man, there is something about the presence of your store. It’s so peaceful and calming. What is that?’”
celebrating the unique The ladies want their store to be a place of solace, reflection, and inspiration. “When you come in the door, you leave your problems outside... You have to focus on the piece, design, color. People say ‘I don’t have a creative bone in my body,’” but Alex explains that “the placement of the stamp or the color they choose — that’s creative for them.” Lauren says, “It’s Pottery by You- you can be creative on your own.” The Handleys want people to know that you don’t have to know how to paint, sew, stencil, or write beautiful calligraphy; it’s all about taking the talents God has given you and using it to make a unique piece of art — just like the creator.
Lauren
Being kind and patient, having a loving spirit towards people... making that atmosphere, the music we play... it opens people up to a place where people can see God.
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side-by-side Pottery By You currently has set up shop in the same breezeway as Madison Hopeful Group, a ministry that is reaching out to people who struggle with alcoholism and who are working on the recovery process. Being side-by-side this outreach has enabled the Handley family to minister to its members simply by opening their doors and inviting them into their lives. “They will come in and paint and it’s kind of therapy for them. That’s really exciting, that we’re able to help people and to encourage them,” explains Alex. “That’s what I’ll miss,” says Leah, talking of when they potentially move to a different location. “We always invite them over and tell them it’s an ongoing discount.” The Handleys tell a story of one of the Madison Hopeful members who they have known for years as he has been in and out of jail. As they continue to pour into his life, he recently came in and told them how he has given his life to the Lord and wants them to come to his baptism. “Some of the people in there are like family to us,” says Alex. Alex also tells a story of a girl who was painting a piece but having issues with the fact that her lettering wasn’t perfect. When reassured that if “it was perfect, it wouldn’t be by you,” she began to see that the imperfection was where she could find the charm. “That’s how we are as people; we have imperfections but it can still look beautiful,” explains Alex. The girl wrote “just breathe” and realized it was kind of a spiritual moment of accepting and loving herself — imperfections included.
blank canvas “ You don’t realize what you’re painting can be spiritual. It can just come
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out in your artwork,” the Handleys say. Once it is put through the fire, it comes out better than the creator realized. That is a perfect metaphor for our lives, truly. We are a blank canvas — we pick up some things along the way and are then put through the fire and tested. “In our lives, things didn’t look a certain way right then,” says Alex of how when they first moved here they would have never imagined that this is where they would be, “ but,” she says, “this is phenomenal.”
conversations in the breezeway But the Handleys use their space for more than just pottery. Opening up their studio to some friends, they help host nights of worship one Saturday a month. Not only are they opening up their space to people for events but given their proximity to Madison Hopeful, these nights are ways to further expose their members to people who are focused on serving God and loving others. After one night of worship, some of the attendees went into the breezeway to speak with some Madison Hopeful members to simply have a conversation and be kind and encouraging. Pottery By You also opened up their doors to host a Mother’s Day Market with small business owners in the community and welcomed supporters at a Shattered canvas painting event. “Since we’re a community business, we’ve been able to connect people with our church,” says Lauren. They use their influence to encourage others, especially people who are new to the city, to find a church home and get plugged in before they get into the comfortable pattern of sleeping in on Sunday. Lauren tells how nice it is to “come home from school and to have another family here... it’s a blessing,” which is what this creative studio is really all about.
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