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DIRECTOR’S CHAIR Well, it’s certainly been an eventful couple of months. It seems like about a minute ago I was writing about finally having gay marriage become legal in Florida. And now, we are celebrating gay marriage becoming legal throughout the country. Bruce came out as Caitlyn, which has made way more of an impact on mainstream than when Chastity came out as Chaz. It’s funny. Chaz danced all over national television leading a woman and it seemingly flew under the radar compared to Caitlyn on the cover of a magazine. And now, as if to rub salt in the wounds of every red blooded, heterosexual, sports loving man in the country who has had a problem with this gender change, the ESPYs are about to give her the Arthur Ashe Courage Award. Listen, I happen to believe that it does take a huge amount of courage to admit to yourself that you are not the gender that you believe you should have been. I also think it takes a huge amount of courage to admit that to the masses, especially when you are the famous guy from the box of Wheaties. I applaud Caitlyn on just about every level. I also think that the ESPYs are playing the game for the ratings rather than giving the award to someone who deserves it more. I won’t name names, but there are women who have been active in the world of sports this year, who should have been recognized with this honor, and probably would have been if Caitlyn had not stepped out of the closet. Don’t start sending me angry emails. Like I said, my hat is truly off to Caitlyn. I just think that in the same way the time should match the crime, awards should be given for the right reasons, not just to boost ratings and get attention. But hey, organizations have been giving awards to people based on finances rather than actual community contribution for decades. It shouldn’t really surprise us anymore. The upshot is that, like Chaz, Caitlyn has caused the conversation about transgender issues to be in the foreground and we all know that visibility matters. Meanwhile, although there are some people who should be fired or arrested for violating the law of the land by refusing to issue marriage licenses, gay people are still becoming legally wedded husbands and wives from sea to shining sea. Although I hoped this day would come, it’s is not something I ever thought I would see in my lifetime. The confederate flag is coming down and the LGBT flag is going up. America is certainly headed in the right direction. Next stop? A woman in the White House. Now that would make this the most historic year ever! See you next month.
MANAGING EXECUTIVE EDITOR Tina Sordellini PUBLICITY DIRECTOR SHE ESPAÑOL EXECUTIVE EDITOR Maria Espinal ASSOCIATE EDITORS Marissa Cohen • Shawn Nicholson Denise Warner • Donna Solomon-Carter CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Chris Azzopardi • Marissa Cohen Verónica Espinal • The Village Sage Tina Sordellini • Denise Warner CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS Verónica Espinal • Yadira Claralt Shawn Nicholson • Angie Sowers Juan Saco Mironoff • Boi-Photography SALES ASSOCIATES Maria Espinal • Marissa Cohen ads@shemag.com DISTRIBUTION JR Davis • Randy Justice SUBSCRIPTIONS www.shemag.com EDITORIAL OFFICE 6511 Nova Drive, #173 • Davie, FL 33317 954.354.9751 office info@shemag.com • www.shemag.com facebook
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SHE: WOMEN OWNED. WOMEN OPERATED. WOMEN EMPOWERED! The ideas and opinions expressed in She Magazine do not necessarily reflect opinions of Shemag, L.L.C., She Magazine, or of editors or staff. Publication of the name or photograph of any person or organization should not be construed as any indication of the sexual orientation of that person or organization. All advertising subject to approval by She Magazine. She Magazine/Shemag, L.L.C. is not responsible for unauthorized use or copyright infringement as present in camera ready, client provided ads, nor is it liable for any loss or suit arising from submitted advertisement, copy, photography, or artwork. Reproduction of She Magazine, in whole or in part, is strictly prohibited without the express written consent of Shemag, L.L.C.
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in this issue
JUly 2015 / volume 17 / issue 6
22
16 features 14 LGBT GROUP ISSUE GUIDE AFTER HISTORIC RULING “The website is intended to provide general information regarding major areas of marriage-based protections. Before deciding whether, when and where to marry, same-sex couples may want to consult an attorney for individualized legal advice. ” 16 JANE FONDA AND LILY TOMLIN “...When I was young, I was the female that gay guys wanted to try to become heterosexual with. A very famous actor who’s gay—and I will not name names—asked me to marry him. I was very flattered, but I said, ‘Why?’ This was 1964.” 20 TRAVELING SOLO? DON’T TRAVEL ALONE! Travelingalonecansometimesseemlikeadauntingtask.Ifyouaren’tpartofacouple,youhavetodo allthework–searchingforflights,bookinghotelrooms,researchingthingstodoandthelistgoeson. 22 SHE GIRLS #LOVEWINS. Meet out lovely wedded She Girls, Lauren and Darcy.
she espaÑol 24 NOTICIAS 25 SOY MUJER departments 06 DIRECTOR’S CHAIR 10 MULTIMEDIA 14 IN THE NEWS 22 SHE GIRL 26 GOOD READS 30 SCOPES
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multimedia
with marissa cohen
Sick of Sarah’s Anthem burns with passion and pulses like a living heart. Guitarist and lead singer Abisha Uhl, guitarist/vocalist Jessie Farmer, drummer/vocalist Jessica Forsythe, and guitarist/vocalist Katie Murphy have started to self-release their material, after years of being with Adamant Records. Their angst-filled, “Rooftops” deserves to be blasted at top volume and channels the best of The Breeders, while “Blind” and “Contagious” are not to be missed. Available now.
Halle Berry’s Molly is easily the best thing about CBS’s Extant (Wednesdays, 10 pm). Season 2 introduces Jeffrey Dean Morgan as a bounty hunter, while Molly deals with some pretty major issues ranging from crippling loss to dealing with her mysterious space-baby pregnancy…and the offspring might just be up for offing the entire human race. With Pierce Gagnon, Grace Gummer.
Comic genius Amy Schumer’s Trainwreck hits theaters July 17, and it’s just as feministperfect as her Inside Amy Schumer. Judd Apatow directed this Schumer-penned film about a woman who enjoys booze and sex far too much to settle down until she meets a guy who might be her soul mate. Trainwreck confirms what most of us have known for a while—Amy Schumer is clever, brilliant, and pure hilarity incarnate, and Trainwreck is sheer genius. With Mike Birbiglia, Bill Hader.
On Nina Revisited: A Tribute to Nina Simone, music by this jazzy goddess of yesteryear gets the full treatment from Lauryn Hill, Usher, Mary J. Blige, Jazmine Sullivan and others, in this 16-track wonder. Made as a companion album to the release of Netflix’s upcoming What Happened, Miss Simone?, this tribute collection has many showstoppers, including Lauryn Hill’s gorgeous reboot of “Feeling Good,” and Usher kills it on “My Baby Just Cares For Me.” Available July 10.
Viola Davis and Jennifer Lopez star as the title characters in Lila and Eve, two grieving mothers who meet in a support group for parents who’ve lost children to violence. Davis, as the harrowed Lila, finds that the cops aren’t doing much with her son’s case, so Lopez’s Eve advises her to find the killers herself. This ripped-from-the-headlines film is raw and smart. Lila’s transformation from mom to vigilante rebel who will stop at nothing to see her son avenged is inspired. Releases on July 17.
William Hurt and Rebecca Front star in AMC’s Humans (Sundays , 9 pm), a chilling sci-fi series about Synths, humanoid servants that are the new must-have item. Book nerds will love the fact that Isaac Asimov is mentioned by name, and AMC explodes our relationship to current technology, showing through a clear, horror-filled lens how dangerous it might truly be. Humans provides an excellent, creepy look at robots and their place in society.
NOT TO BE MISSED: Jen Foster’s new project The White Room Sessions, which promises to be as amazing as Foster herself. “Faithfully” is available for download now in honor of SCOTUS’s historic marriage equality ruling, but you’ll want to spring for the whole album. She 10 07.15
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pandora events presented splash, saturday’s pool party during girls in wonderland at the women’s host hotel orlando, fl benefiting nclr. photos by karina saravia. more photos at shemag.com
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in the news LGBT Advocacy Groups Issue Guide After Historic Marriage Ruling In the wake of the U.S. Supreme Court’s historic decision striking down discriminatory state bans on marriage for same-sex couples, six LGBT advocacy organizations launched a joint website MarriageEqualityFacts.org—also available in Spanish—to provide answers to samesex couples and their families as they navigate accessing the rights, benefits, and protections that marriage affords. Created by American Civil Liberties Union, Freedom to Marry, Gay & Lesbian Advocates & Defenders, Human Rights Campaign, Lambda Legal, and the National Center for Lesbian Rights, MarriageEqualityFacts.org addresses a wide range of issues and questions same-sex couples may have concerning both getting married and having their marriages recognized and respected. The guide includes information on seven topics: marriage licenses and wedding planning; parent-child relationships; social security; veterans’ benefits; retirement benefits; income taxes; and employment protections.
“Love won today. We all did. Today’s civil rights victory is the triumph of a decades-long movement, a compelling and smart social-change strategy, and a campaign that tenaciously drove it forward enlisting movement organizations, advocates, operatives, organizers, funders, allies, and, of course, loving couples, family members, neighbors, and, ultimately, the majority of Americans. Together we transformed people’s understanding of who we are and why marriage matters, opened hearts and changed minds, and spurred elected officials and courts to live up to America’s ideals. Freedom to Marry will work with our movement colleagues to ensure that the command of the Constitution is faithfully and swiftly implemented, bringing the freedom to marry, and the marriage conversation, to every corner of the country,” said Evan Wolfson, president of Freedom to Marry on June 26th. The website is intended to provide general information regarding major areas of marriage-based protections. Before deciding whether, when and where to marry, same-sex couples may want to consult an attorney for individualized legal advice. It is also important to remember that the particular rights and obligations of marriage can vary from state to state. MarriageEqualityFacts.org
the department of veterans affairs To Extend Benefits To SameSex Couples Following Supreme Court Ruling On Monday, June 29, 2015, the Department of Veterans Affairs (VA) confirmed they would begin extending benefits to legally married same-sex couples nationwide as a result of the historic marriage equality ruling by the Supreme Court last week. Previously, the VA had denied some benefits to same sex couples who lived in states where their marriages were not recognized. Last week’s Supreme Court ruling negated the legal basis for those denials and the VA confirmed they are currently drafting guidance for their benefits offices to begin issuing benefits to those couples. Benefits previously denied included VA disability compensation, death pensions, burial rights and even home loan guarantees. Although still working on the final guidance, the VA said they would temporarily hold pending benefits applications that might have been denied under previous guidelines and they will later be processed under the new guidelines.
what he said about...
“No union is more profound than marriage, for it embodies the highest ideals of love, fidelity, devotion, sacrifice, and family. In forming a marital union, two people become something greater than once they were. As some of the petitioners in these cases demonstrate, marriage embodies a love that may endure even past death. It would misunderstand these men and women to say they disrespect the idea of marriage. Their plea is that they dorespect it, respect it so deeply that they seek to find itsfulfillment for themselves. Their hope is not to be condemned to live in loneliness, excluded from one of civilization’s oldest institutions. They ask for equal dignity in the eyes of the law. The Constitution grants them that right.The judgment of the Court of Appeals for the Sixth Circuit is reversed. It is so ordered.” Excerpt from Chief Justice Anthony Kennedy who delivered the opinion of the Court on same-sex marriage, on Friday, June 26, 2015.
The American Military Partner Association and Lambda Legal filed a lawsuit in December of 2014 on behalf of AMPA members who had been denied benefits. According to Broadway-Mack, the lawsuit should now be unnecessary as long as the new VA rules recognize all legal marriages in every state. For more information about the American Military Partner Association and LGBT military families, please visit our home on the web at MilitaryPartners.org.
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LGBT HEROINE EDIE WINDSOR SAYS, “GO GET MARRIED! BUT ‘TALK BEFORE YOU WALK.’”
SAGE Partners with Windsor to Help LGBT Older People and Couples Who Want to Marry SAGE stands with LGBT communities and allies in celebration of the historic Supreme Court Decision in Obergefell v. Hodges, which finally brings the freedom to marry to all Americans. “This is another huge step toward total equality for all of us,” said LGBT heroine Edie Windsor. “Every step has increased our self-esteem and with that, more of us come out and we are seen by our families, our friends, our colleagues, our own children. By all means— go, get married! But before you do, learn how a marriage will impact you, both financially and legally. Put simply, talk before you walk. SAGE and I are partnering to make sure people, including LGBT older people, can find the information they need on marriage. Check out TALKBEFOREYOUWALK.ORG to find out what marriage may mean for you.” The denial of marriage equality has had serious consequences for LGBT older people. Until now, for example, a same-sex married couple’s eligibility for Social Security spousal and survivor benefits, certain Medicare benefits, and certain Veterans’ benefits were determined by the state in which they lived. As a result, states that prohibited same-sex marriages could also deny those benefits. Those
discriminatory practices are now behind us. Despite this victory, LGBT older adults and others still are not free from discrimination. There is still no federal law protecting LGBT individuals from discrimination in the workplace, public accommodations (like restaurants, movie theaters, and senior centers), housing, jury service, or financial transactions, many states also do not provide those legal protections. As same-sex couples from Texas to North Dakota walk down to the courthouse to get married, the march for full LGBT equality continues.
THE DEMOCRATIC HISPANIC CAUCUS OF FLORIDA CELEBRATES THE VICTORY OF LOVE The Democratic Hispanic Caucus of Florida celebrated the victory of love and equality for all Americans in today’s 5 to 4 Supreme Court ruling in support of Marriage Equality. It is time to hear the voices of all Americans who wish to exercise their civil right to marry who they love no matter what gender they may be. We, the Hispanic Caucus, believe in diversity and inclusion and today was a victory for the 1.4 million Latino members of the LGBT community and their families. “Decisions about marriage are among the most intimate that an individual can make. Allowing LGBT people to marry is a matter of personal choice and autonomy, just as it was in the Court’s 1967 decision in Loving v. Virginia, which outlawed bans on interracial marriage.” - Justice Anthony Kennedy.
“Today’s SCOTUS decision proves that America is moving in the right direction for Equality and Justice for All,” said Vivian Rodriguez, President of the Democratic Hispanic Caucus of Florida, on Marriage Equality.
WHAT TO DO, WHERE TO GO ISRAELI DANCING WILTON MANORS through October 1 Thursdays 7-9 PM Hagan Park 2020 Wilton Drive, Wilton Manors GALLA (GAY & LESBIAN LAWYER’S ASSN.) LUNCHEON – DOWNTOWN July 8 • 12PM - 1:30PM City Hall, The Restaurant 2004 Biscayne Blvd., Miami gogaymiami.com TRANSART Through July 12 1130 Washington Ave. • gogaymiami.com REPTIDAY FT. LAUDERDALE REPTILE & EXOTIC ANIMAL SHOW July 11 • 10AM - 5PM Universal Palms Hotel
4900 Powerline Rd., Fort Lauderdale LESBIANS GUIDE TO LEGAL MARRIAGE Jul 16 • 6PM - 9PM LGBT Visitor Center 1130 Washington Ave. • gogaymiami.com RSVP: lori@gogaymiami.com ARIANA GRANDE: THE HONEYMOON TOUR WITH PRINCE ROYCE July 16 • 7:30PM Amelie Arena • 401 Channelside Drive Tampa, FL 33602 July 18 • 7PM BB&T CENTER One Panther Parkway, Sunrise SPOTLIGHT MEGA-MIXER NETWORKER July 23 • 6PM - 9PM Bacardi’s Headquarters, 2701 Le Jeune Road Coral Gables • gaybizmiami.com
FRIDAY NIGHT SOUND WAVES FEATURING BOSSAS, BOLEROS AND BLUES July 24 • 5:30PM - 8:30 PM The Fort Lauderdale Beach Hub at Las Olas & A1A 300 S. Fort Lauderdale Beach Blvd CIRQUE DU SOLEIL: VAREKAI Aug 12 - 23 BB&T Center 2555 NW 136th Ave, Sunrise, FL cirquedusoleil.com/Sunrise PRIDELINES MASQUERADE BALL Aug 15 • Biltmore Hotel Coral Gables • pridelinesmasquerade.com POVERELLO BOWL-A-THON Aug 15 • 11AM - 3PM Sawgrass Lanes, 8501 N University Drive Tamarac, FL 33321 • poverello.org
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by Chris Azzopardi photos by melissa moseley/netflix
on the cover
Get social with jane fonda and lily tomlin: @janefonda / @LilyTomlin @granceandfrankie / netflix.com
Lily Tomlin’s watching Jane Fonda weep. As the showbiz icon releases a steady stream of waterworks, she’s “wiping tears away,” Tomlin notes. Fonda pauses slightly to collect herself before answering. The question? Why gay men have forever revered older women even when the rest of the world—and Hollywood—have not. “I find the question so moving that it makes me cry,” says Fonda. It’s one revelatory moment among many during this candid conversation with the 77-
year-old actress and Tomlin, 75, who appear together in the new Netflix original series Grace and Frankie. The beloved pair play two golden girls forced to start anew after their husbands drop a big truth bomb: They’re in love with each other. This isn’t the actresses’ first time working together, of course. In 1980, Tomlin and Fonda memorably joined forces with Dolly Parton to put misogynistic men in their place in Nine to Five. Decades later, the film is a feminist-celebrated comedy classic.
Will Dolly make a cameo on Grace and Frankie? During our freewheeling interview, the two longtime friends talked about the possibility of a Nine to Five reunion on their new series, but they revealed plenty more, too. Fonda opened up about her own experiences dating high-profile gay men, one of whom proposed to her. Tomlin recalled the time she lashed out at Chita Rivera. But first, the crying. You’ve both addressed aging in Hollywood, and this show deals a lot
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with aging as well. Historically, gay men—we love our “Golden Girls,” we already love Grace and Frankie, we love our Chers and Bette Midlers. Why do you think, despite Hollywood’s reputation for ageism, there has always been a place for older women in the gay community? Lily: I may be terribly wrong and cutting my tongue out for this: It’s like, well, we’re women of a certain age, and maybe we’re considered more audacious. Jane: I find the question so moving that it makes me cry. I had never thought of it before, and it makes me so moved. I think Lily put her finger on it just now. Older women tend to be more audacious; they’re bigger and bolder and, God knows, gay men love big and bold, right? Does it go any deeper than that, do you think? Lily: It’s like [drag performer] Lypsinka. I knew he was from Mississippi. He’s like a little kitten in a way; his hair is so soft and pale red, and he’s got a big, high, very white-skinned forehead. When I first saw Lypsinka, I could just see this little boy— 4 or 5 years old in Mississippi—growing up around all these Southern women. My family’s Southern too. I just saw him seeing through them and into their hearts. He saw the women being oppressed and being pigeonholed and how they act kind of audaciously just to free themselves. I just could see that little boy, and he satirized women’s behavior so brilliantly—all the stuff, the travails they have—and I just wept when I saw him because he was so brilliant. I think there are hinges between those two things. Jane: (wiping tears from her eyes) How she said that—that he sees through them into their hearts. And also, the notion of surviving. Lily: And him making up this incredible creature who’s just so much fun to watch and yet it’s painful. I could feel his little boy pain all through those years. You both have had a profound influence on the LGBT and ally movements. Can you share a moment in your lives
as LGBT activists and trailblazers that stand out as particularly memorable to you? Jane: Campaigning with Harvey Milk in the Castro District in San Francisco for Prop 6. He was the most joyous. He was like Allen Ginsberg. He was always smiling and laughing. He was beloved and he was funny, the most lovable person. I was so happy when I was with him. And it was just so much fun going into those gay bars with him—oh my God! Lily: I never got to meet Harvey Milk. I knew [LGBT activist and historian] Vito Russo; he was my good friend. I used to exchange so many stories with him. I was up on the Strip one night when I was not on Laugh-In yet. I
was unknown and a woman that I was friends with who was a publicist had brought Chita Rivera to meet me, and Chita talked with a Bronx accent and she’s talking really fast and you don’t know what she’s saying. I kind of zoned out for a minute because I could hardly understand her at that point. Then I suddenly heard her say, “purse nelly.” First she had said my “boy dancers” and the skin on the back of my neck bristled up, and that’s when she said
“purse nelly” and then I just went ballistic. I said, “What did you say?!” You lashed out at Chita Rivera? Lily: I lashed out. She said, “I dunno! WHADISAY?” I said, “You said, ‘purse nelly.’ I wanna know what that means. What you meant by that!” “I don’t know. Whadisay? Pursenelly? Personally.” She was saying “personally”! Jane: Personally! (Laughs) Lily: And I didn’t even cop to it. I was so embarrassed. I just doubled over laughing and fell on the floor. Jane: I just went to my 60th high school reunion. I went four years to an all-girls boarding school, and in the days leading up to the reunion I kept wondering, “God, I wonder whatever happened to Pat Johnson?” Because everyone in the class knew that Patty Johnson was gay, or at least we thought that she was. But no one talked about it. Not even among ourselves. Nobody ever said anything. And she was at the reunion—there were only four of us at the reunion. Lily: Four out of the whole class?! Awww. Jane: And Pat Johnson was there, with an oxygen tank, mind you. It was the first time she’d been out to dinner in five years because she had some allergies to chemicals. And there she was with her wife! An amazing woman violinist! And I thought, well, this is very great. I never ever would have imagined back in the day that Pat Johnson would be able to get married to her lady friend. Let’s talk about your friendship with each other. Was it smooth sailing from the very beginning? Lily: Yeah, we hit it off right away. I was so excited when Jane came to see one of my shows way back in the day Jane: This was pre-Nine to Five! Lily: Yeah. I was all excited. She came backstage and was very complimentary, and then next thing I knew… Jane: I was offering her a role in Nine to Five, which was originally going to be a serious movie until I saw Lily’s one-woman show called Appearing Nightly. I decided I didn’t
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want to make a movie about office workers until she was one of them. And it had to be a comedy. It took me a year to convince her and Dolly to be in it! During that year, we kind of saw each other because we’d be talking about different ideas and stuff, and so we kind of became friends before Nine to Five. What is different about working with each other on Grace and Frankie compared to when you worked together on Nine to Five 35 years ago? Jane: We’re together more! I mean, it’s four months, almost every day for almost 15 hours, which is a real treat for me. You know, Lily is very unusual. She has a real funny bone. So, watching her take on not just the scripts but life is a pleasure. Lily: Thank you, Ms. Fonda!
After doing the first season of Grace and Frankie, what advice do you have for women who are romantically involved with a gay man? Jane: Try to stay friends. You know, it happened to a friend of mine when I lived in Atlanta, and she told me about it and it was very hard for her because she really loved him a lot. Because she loved him, she was able to understand that he needed to become who he really was. They remained very, very close friends and they still live in the same building. I think that’s the way to do it. Compassion, empathy, love, understanding—we need more of it. Have either of you dated a gay man before? Jane: Oh yes! Oh my God. When I was young, I was the female that gay guys wanted to try to become heterosexual with. A very famous
actor who’s gay—and I will not name names— asked me to marry him. I was very flattered, but I said, “Why?” This was 1964. And I mean, he wasn’t the only one. It’s very interesting. And I lived for two years with a guy who was trying to become heterosexual. I’m intimately acquainted with that. Did that come to mind as you were shooting this show, where you are married to a gay man? Jane: (Laughs) No! Not until you made me think of it right now. Lily, have you had any similar experiences? No, I didn’t, but I had girlfriends who dated gay guys in college and they couldn’t understand why so-and-so didn’t, you know, take them into their arms and sweep them away. Because they danced together so well! They were beautiful, tall blonde people! They were just kind of breathtaking, and they did make a nice looking couple, but that was about as far as it would go—looks. I had a girlfriend and we got into a big fight about being gay when I first moved to New York. She was watching Lust for Life with Anthony Quinn, who is so macho as Gauguin in that movie. I said something like, “Look how macho this guy is—he’s unbelievable!” She said, “If I were gay, I’d beat down the door of the nearest psychiatrist.” I said, “If I fell in love with my refrigerator, I’d give it lamb chops!” Netflix has really been a pioneer in reaching beyond LGBT stereotypes and being LGBT inclusive, and it’s done it again with Grace and Frankie. How do you feel about the state of gay characters on TV as a whole? And what is it about this platform that allows Netflix to tell LGBT stories without getting gimmicky or exploitative? Lily: I think it’s been a long time coming. Although, it’s happened because of so many things that have gone before, and this culture has changed. Large parts of the culture have changed. Not the culture as a whole. You know, there’s still a lot of… Jane: Homophobia. I lived in the South for 20 years, and, unfortunately, homophobia is all too alive and rampant, but because there are so many more gay men and women in mass media and they’re very lovable—and more and more people are coming out— Americans know somebody who’s gay and lesbian. Once that happens, it’s a lot harder to remain homophobic.
Did you ever think that gay marriage would be a reality in your lifetime? Lily: No, I did not. Jane: No, I didn’t either. Lily: I mean, I began to suspect. The last generation or two that have come along, they so demanded to be visible and they’ve taken for granted everything that the gay community had fought for so hard for a long time—it was wiped away from their minds that they were not accepted or not loved. I mean, they may have known it but they didn’t own it. Jane: I agree, and I’m very optimistic. I found what Justice Kennedy said—that it should be looked at as sex discrimination—cause for optimism. I remember when this show was announced, everyone was really hyped about you two getting back together, but they were also hoping for a Dolly Parton cameo. Has that been discussed as a real possibility amongst showrunners? Lily: Well, it’s been discussed because so many people inquired about it and thought about it. Of course Dolly’s a good friend and the three of us really like each other and we’ve been friends all these years, but because Grace and Frankie is set apart, we want to establish our identity before we think about dragging the Nine to Five life into it. Jane: It’s a different style. It’s a different animal. We wanna keep it that way. For now, anyway. What do you think your Nine to Five characters, Judy and Violet, are up to these days? Jane: Violet’s probably heading up a Silicon Valley company! Maybe we’re married!
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feature
By stephanie papadakis
Traveling alone can sometimes seem like a daunting task. If you aren’t part of a couple, you have to do all the work – searching for flights, booking hotel rooms, researching things to do and the list goes on. Even when you’ve landed in your spot and are ready to explore, you may be hesitant to do so because you’re nervous about being by yourself. Enter cruising. Cruises are a great way to see the world and make many new friends while doing it. In fact, several cruise lines today have beefed up their offerings, allowing single and solo travelers to make decisions other than “How am I supposed to pay for that dreaded single supplement?” Both Norwegian Cruise Line and P & O offer dedicated studio cabins for solo cruisers. Royal Caribbean also debuted solo cabins with “virtual balconies” (80-inch floor-to-ceiling LED screens projecting real-time ocean and port views). And numerous other cruise lines, such as Holland America, host onboard solo traveler events like cocktail mixers and games that can be a great way to meet others. So now you’re thinking about taking a cruise, but you’re still nervous because you’ll be surrounded by straight folks? Check out Olivia Travel. Olivia is the world’s largest lesbian travel company and has offered cruise, resort, adventure and riverboat vacations for 25 years. They also charter entire ships and buy out whole resorts so you don’t have to worry about pesky travelers making you feel uncomfortable. And guess what? They have a Solos Program! It’s extensive and there are onboard solos coordinators there to facilitate just about everything.
From singles’ dinners and cocktail parties to pool games and dance parties, you’ll have plenty of opportunities to mingle and meet new friends. From the very first interaction with a travel consultant, Olivia will make you feel welcome and excited to be traveling alone. For starters, they offer a roommate matching service so you don’t have to pay the single supplement. They will find a roommate for you based on your specific preferences, like whether you are a social drinker or non-drinker, or a smoker or non-smoker. Once you arrive, you will be greeted with a full Solos Program guide to alert you of all the solo events happenings throughout the week. On the first day there is a meet and greet, where you will meet your solos coordinators and be given a solos dog tag so other single travelers will be able to identify you. You’ll also meet the other single travelers who choose to come to introduce themselves. The solos coordinators will tell you about the designated excursions, the special seating for all meals and at the nightly shows, and all the activities planned for you throughout the week. Of course, it is not a requirement to be part of the solos program; it’s just there to help you make new friends. Activity options abound for solos; in fact, there are probably more activities planned for solos than for the general traveler! Speed dating is a great way to meet that special someone (it has been known to happen… quite a few times). If you like to be active, Wet-n-Wacky pool games are offered every day at noon on the big-ship cruises and resorts, and a solos team always participates in the Olivia Olympics at resorts. There are also solos dance lessons, pub crawls, Wii bowling and trivia. In addition, Olivia offers a Facebook group just for solo travelers so you can keep in touch at the end of the trip. You can also join the Facebook trip group to keep in touch with other non-solo friends. Now you know about your solo lesbian cruise options. You don’t even need to plan anything. All you have to do is book that trip and everything is taken care of, just for you. That begs the big question…where are you going to travel next?
Olivia’s Solos Program is offered only on select cruises and resorts. For more information about the program and upcoming trips, visit Olivia.com. mention She Magazine to receive a special discount!
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the hottest night party for women and signature event, girls in wonderland, at the house of blues in downtown disney in orlando, fl. photos by karina saravia. more photos at shemag.com
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SHE GIRLS
Lauren & Darcie // alameda, ca See more photos online at www.shemag.com
#LOVEWINS
occupations: Darcie (right)—Runs her own outdoor summer camp for kids in San Francisco and is working on opening her own preschool. Lauren (left)—Deputy Sheriff.
we met: In 2005 how we met: We had both recently moved to San Francisco. I [Lauren] was attending college at San Francisco State University and working at Starbucks part time. Darcie went into Starbucks for a coffee and to say hi to a friend that also worked there. We were introduced and the sparks flew. our most memorable date: The night we had our first kiss at the Lexington Club in San Francisco. We were actually tasked with selling raffle tickets for a fundraiser at the bar, but got a little distracted. I remember walking out of there afterward holding Darcie’s hand thinking how it all felt so right. who proposed and how: We always liked taking photo booth pictures together, so Darcie picked a venue in San Francisco with a photo booth. She convinced me we were just having a gathering with friends and encouraged me to invite many of our friends to join. Once at the venue, it felt like every friend we had ever made was there, but I was still oblivious as to why! I assumed it must have been a convenient weekend for everyone to meet up. She nonchalantly
asked me if I wanted to take a photo booth pic with her and of course, I said yes. While we were in the photo booth, Darcie had a friend switch out the freshly printed photo strip with one she had taken earlier. We exited the photo booth and I found all our friends were gathered around us with smiling faces. I picked up the photo strip and saw Darcie, holding a decorated heart with a different message in each frame. The message read, “Will you marry me?” I was so surprised! Darcie then got down on one knee in front of all our friends and the rest is history.
we got married at: Golden Gate Park our wedding was: An amazing, beautiful day spent celebrating our love, surrounded by our wonderful friends and family.
our favorite vacation spot: Anywhere with a little sunshine, outdoor activities and good food!
last movie we saw in the theater: Ex Machina our favorite show to binge watch: Chopped! We Just Won a Million Dollars. The FIRST Thing We Do: Scream, cry, hug and start watching the Suze Orman show. what’s next for us: So many things on the list! But we would like to start a family, buy a home and adopt a dog!
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noticias Día del Orgullo: Más de 60 mil personas marchan por la igualdad en Santiago Más de 60 mil personas marcharon en Santiago, Concepción, La Serena, Talca y Puerto Montt el 27 de Junio pasado para exigir la igualdad de derechos y conmemorar los 46 años del Día Internacional del Orgullo y los 24 años del movimiento de lesbianas, gays, bisexuales y transexuales en Chile. En Santiago la “XV Marcha por el Orgullo de Ser Tú Mismo” fue coordinada por el Movimiento de Integración y Liberación Homosexual (Movilh) en alianza con la Federación Chilena de la Diversidad Sexual (Fedisech), mientras que el Frente por la Diversidad Sexual y Chile Gay Deportes convocaron en paralelo por primera vez a un desfile en el marco de estas fechas, desplegándose así en Plaza Italia tres coloridos camiones por la igualdad.
Mientras que embajador de Estados Unidos, Michael Hammer, se refirió al tremendo avance de la legalización del matrimonio igualitario en todo Estados Unidos el viernes 26 de Junio pasado, el embajador de la Unión Europea, Rafael Dochao, cuya Delegación patrocinó y difundió la convocatoria del Frente por la Diversidad Sexual, expresó el apoyo de los países europeos a la causa LGBTI. La multitudinaria marcha se enmarcó en una fecha doblemente significativa para la diversidad sexual chilena.: 46 años atrás homosexuales y transexuales se rebelaron contra la represión policial en el bar Stonewall Inn de Nueva York, dando origen al Día Internacional del Orgullo. En tanto, 24 años atrás, un mismo 28 de junio, surgió en Chile el Movilh, dando origen a la lucha sistemática LGBT e intersexuales en dicho país.
Puerto Rico adopta medidas para permitir matrimonio homosexual, tras fallo en Estados Unidos Miles de personas en Puerto Rico celebraron el fallo histórico de la Corte Suprema de Estados Unidos que permite los casamientos gay, en tanto que las autoridades se apresuraban a adoptar medidas para ampliar los derechos del matrimonio en la isla socialmente conservadora. Apenas horas después del fallo, el gobernador Alejandro García Padilla firmó una orden ejecutiva que obliga a las agencias del gobierno a acatar la decisión de la corte en un plazo de 15 días. Como resultado, es previsible que el Departamento de Salud y otras agencias en la isla comiencen a emitir licencias matrimoniales a parejas del mismo sexo a inicios de julio. El secretario de Justicia César Miranda dijo que aunque no estaba claro de inmediato si el fallo significa que las parejas gay en Puerto Rico tendrán derecho ahora a adoptar niños, él aceptaría y apoyaría el cambio. “Es momento de convertir a Puerto Rico de verdad en una sociedad más justa y equitativa, y no depender de decisiones que vengan de afuera para lograrlo”, dijo José Rodriguez, portavoz del grupo Heterosexuales Por la Igualdad.
El 73 % de los colombianos se opone a la adopción homoparental El 73 % de los colombianos considera que las parejas del mismo sexo no deberían poder adoptar hijos, según reveló recientemente una encuesta elaborada por la firma Ipsos Napoleón Franco para varios medios de comunicación. Los resultados muestran que sobre la cuestión se posicionaron a favor el 24 % de los encuestados, en tanto que el 3 % restante no sabe o no contesta. La Corte Constitucional rechazó el pasado 18 de febrero la adopción por parejas del mismo sexo, si bien mantuvo la opción de hacerlo cuando el niño es hijo biológico de uno de los dos. Esa decisión siguió la línea de una resolución del Constitucional en agosto de 2014, cuando aprobó la adopción de una niña por parte de una mujer que es pareja sentimental de la madre biológica. Además, ya ha dado su visto bueno al derecho de los homosexuales a adoptar niños, pero de forma individual.
Tras estos antecedentes, el alto tribunal estudia desde hace meses la ponencia sobre la adopción por parte de parejas del mismo sexo, cuestión que registró un nuevo empate el pasado 7 de abril, cuando se votó una segunda demanda basada en el derecho de los niños a tener una familia. La encuesta de Ipsos se realizó a 1.335 personas de todo el país, mayores de 18 años procedentes de todos los niveles socioeconómicos que, a través de entrevistas presenciales y telefónicas, configuran una muestra representativa del 67 % de la población urbana adulta, con un margen de error total para la muestra de 2,7 %.
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SOY MUJER
CON verónica espinal
la motivación del día MOTIVACION: f. Acción y efecto de motivar. Ensayo mental preparatorio de una acción para animar o animarse a ejecutarla con interés y diligencia. MOTIVO: adj. Que mueve o tiene eficacia o virtud para mover. Causa o razón que mueve para algo. —Diccionario de la lengua española, Real Academia Española.
Desde hace poco más de un mes tome la decisión de tomar una acción importante en mi vida: Perder peso. Esa decisión la he tomado varias veces y aunque me ha funcionado, he vuelto a caer. Ya sabes, el famoso síndrome del yo-yo. Sin embargo esta vez la siento diferente y estoy determinada a que sea así, aunque no sea 1ro de Enero. ¿Qué me motiva? Varios sentimientos. ¿Cuál o cuales son los motivos? Varias razones. ¿Quién me motiva? Varias personas. La perdida de peso no es algo fácil. Siendo una adicción, estamos vulnerables a reincidir cada minuto del día. Por esa razón, es importante que siempre tengamos en mente la meta final, la razón o razones que nos motivan y a flor de piel el sentimiento que originalmente nos motivó para tomar esa acción. Igualmente es importante tener a alguien que te empuje en los momentos en que flaqueas y que no tienes esa motivación. Yo la tengo y esa amiga me sirve de apoyo, me empuja para dar el primer paso cuando no quiero hacer mis ejercicios y me da apoyo moral. Mejor dicho, nos lo damos mutuamente y es uno de los motivos que alimenta mi decisión. Esta mañana al chequear mis emails, otra amiga mía—que también esta en plan de dieta y ejercicio—me envió un mensaje donde me decía que había tenido un fin de semana malo porque se había pasado en la comida y demás. Yo, por otra parte estaba súper motivada y me encantó haber estado en línea en el momento que ella necesitaba ese empuje que yo he recibido tanto en esta aventura. Después de hablar con esta amiga y darle esas palabras de aliento me sentí motivada para dar más. Acabo de llamar a mis padres. Con reloj en mano, la llamada duró 1:25 minutos, el tiempo justo para saludarlos y decirles a ambos
que estaba pensando en ellos y que los quiero. Sé que esa llamada mañanera les dio la suficiente alegría y motivación para empezar bien ese día. Igualmente me la dio a mí. Luego decidí dar más y les envié un abrazo a todas las personas que tengo registradas en mi teléfono, personas a quienes obviamente estimo y quiero. Contestarme no era necesario. Sencillamente fue una acción gratificante para mí. ¡Por un buen rato mi teléfono vibró más que nunca! Recibí todo tipo de contesta, pero sobre todo fueron extra gratificantes aquellas que decían: “Gracias, hoy lo necesito”. De más esta decirte que me divertí muchísimo haciéndolo y me sentí de maravilla. La verdad es que podemos encontrar esa motivación en cualquier detalle, pero sólo cuando estamos abiertas a encontrarla y hacer un cambio en nuestra vida...y quizá en la de los demás. Recuerda que toda acción en la vida tiene causa y efecto. Solamente está en nosotros, o en ti, en que lo desempeñes para bien o para mal. Muchas veces callamos nuestros sentimientos sin darnos cuenta la fuerza y el efecto de la palabra, del verbo. Hoy, quiero que estas palabras impresas sean tu motivación y tu motivo para que des un poco de ti a tu familia, a tus amigos y a tu pareja. Por la razón que sea, a quien sea y por el medio que sea… ¡Jamás pierdas la oportunidad de decirle a las personas que están a tu alrededor lo que sientes por ellos! Un abrazo, una palmadita en la espalda, una llamada o una sonrisa pueden ser la motivación que otra persona necesita sentir para dar el primer paso ha tomar la decisión de mejorar. Y muy importante, hazlo sin esperar nada a cambio. ¡No pierdas la oportunidad!
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GOOD READS
BY MARISSA COHEN
THE PRINCESS BRIDES by D.K. Linda—This gentle, funny novella tells the story of two young women, the soul mates Princess Dumpling and the poor Candace, who meet at a ball and fall in love. D.K. Linda takes the classic “the crown prince must marry” framework and inverts it, creating a celebration of queer love that pokes fun at itself. The characters’ names are hilarious: there’s a King Milquetoast and Queen Mollycoddle, for example. The Princess Brides is a fast, sweet read.
ROSES AND THORNS by Chris Anne Wolfe— Chris Anne Wolfe’s glorious version of the Beauty and the Beast myth, Roses and Thorns, is finally back in print, thanks to the Chris Anne Wolfe Campaign and Amazons Unite press. The beautiful and clever Angelique is bartered by her abusive father and forced to wed a mysterious and faceless nobleman who has his own secrets. Magic, fairies, and true love are main themes in this intense and flawless reboot of the classic fairy tale. The only thing wrong with Roses and Thorns is that it is too short; you won’t want this deep, rich novel to end.
FINDING HOME by Shelia Powell and Liz McMullen—Finding Home is the glowing series debut from authors Shelia Powell and Liz McMullen. Sort of a cross between The Fosters and The X Files, Finding Home puts a queer twist on the paranormal YA genre. Young firestarter Kayla finds herself in her thirteenth foster home after a history of abuse – but this placement promises to be different. For one thing, Tia, the southern witch who runs the group home, teaches her foster teens how to develop their own supernatural gifts. However, Kayla’s new dream home is threatened when she learns that The Darkness, an ancient and evil entity, is stalking her new family. Finding Home is a tightly written thriller that’s already topping the Amazon.com charts. facebook
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Barbara Gittings: Gay Pioneer, the first full-length biography of the woman who has been called the mother of the gay-rights movement, is available in time for Pride 2015. The book is by journalist Tracy Baim, author of 11 books on LGBT history. Award-winning writer Lillian Faderman wrote the foreword for the book. It is available in both a full-color and B&W editions in print, and will be on Kindle in color July 15. The work of Gittings in the LGBT movement spanned from the late 1950s until her death in 2007. Her partner in life, Kay Lahusen, photographed many of the movement’s biggest actions during the 1960s, and more than 270 photos accompany this biography, making it a historical photo album of the movement. Gittings was active in a wide range of pre- and postStonewall groups, including the Daughters of Bilitis. She served as editor of DOB’s newsletter, The Ladder. She worked with fellow gay pioneer Frank Kameny on many protests and legal cases fighting government discrimination. Perhaps most importantly, Gittings was among the leaders of the push to change the American Psychiatric Association diagnosis of homosexuality as an illness, and she was among those pushing the American Library Association to be more inclusive of gays.
Author and historian John D’Emilio said: “Tracy Baim brings Gittings to life in this captivating and inspiring biography. Skillfully combining Gittings’ own words with accounts of her activist campaigns, this biography makes clear how much Gittings accomplished.” she 26 07.15
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classifieds
community groups/organizations
miscellaneous
Reach The LGBT Women’s Community Advertising in She: A Lot More Affordable Than You Think. Call Today 954-354-9751
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classifieds
photographers
she sisters
she searches SELL SOMETHING YOU LOVE Sales representatives wanted. Unlimited earning potential and some of the highest commissions in the industry! Sales experience, professionalism and a love for She a MUST! Dade, Broward, ORLANDO, TAMPA, JACKSONVILLE areas availiable. Send resumes to donna@ shemag.com. she sisters
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scopes
with the village sage
AQUARIUS JAN 21 - FEB 19 The planets have shifted into overdrive, propelling you to work harder, as well as smarter. Be open to constructive suggestions. Be careful not to take them as criticisms. Situations arise that may be frustrating. Take the time to release pent-up energy in positive physical activity, rather than allowing that frustration to boil over into conflict.
leo July 23 - aug 22 You have the opportunity now to not only review and reflect on your past. You can use your introspection to make positive changes in the here and now. Your energy level gets a huge boost, allowing you to get up, get out and get going, clearing away debris and obstacles to a better future in every aspect of your life.
pisces feb 20 - mar 20 You’re very in tune with your inner feelings. You now have the ability to express your feelings, your hopes and dreams, as well as your fears and disappointments, without having an emotional meltdown. Use past experiences to fine tune your future plans. Face challenges head-on. Be open to new ways to solve old problems.
virgo aug 23 - sept 23 The planets are giving you permission to go out and play without guilt and expand your horizons with travel to new and different places. Even if you stay at home, go explore the world around you. Be open to new ideas about how to accomplish your goals, as well as new methods of communicating with the significant others in your life.
aries mar 21 - apr 20 You should have a fun-filled time all month. Reconnect with important people in your life. Just remember that there are many different ways to get from creating your goals and using strategies to reach them… to actually achieving your stated goals. Be open to the opinions and experiences of everyone involved. Be prepared to implement them.
libra sept 24 - oct 23 Your focus is on the people and the projects in your life and the current balance between what you give, as compared to what you get back. Now is the time to decide what is worth more time and energy and what isn’t. Use your ability to see many sides of a situation and help create a new plan. Use your people skills to implement it.
taurus apr 21 - may 21 You are restless and ready to break through the constraints of your current situation. There are many ways to make positive movements towards changing your circumstances. Perhaps it is not so much what you do or where you do it. Instead, how you do it is the only thing that really matters. Be open to different possibilities.
scorpio oct 24 - nov 22 You’ve been wanting a vacation forever. You are so ready for a romantic comedy adventure. You are ready to leave all of the stress and care of the past few months behind you and just live a care-free existence. The Universe is finally giving you permission to take it. Make sure you take care of business before you go.
gemini may 22 - june 21 You’ve been of mixed mind about your finances. One twin is well aware of your income. The other is oblivious to the rising cost of your self-indulgent nature. The planets are challenging both of you to start working together to put your fiscal house in order. Enlist the help of the significant others in your life to help you enjoy a quality life on a budget.
sagittarius nov 23 - dec 21 You’re more focused on the future and in creating more opportunities for financial stability then you have in a very long time. You’ve been living day to day without much change and are feeling dissatisfied with where you find yourself in life. Time to reevaluate who and what works. Put things into better balance.
cancer June 22 - july 22 You are usually very quiet about your feelings and very careful about your words. You are aware of how words can hurt forever. Now, the planets are giving you an opportunity to actually open up and be very vocal about your needs and wants in a productive way. Whether at work or at home, find your voice, and express yourself for positive results.
capricorn dec 22 - jan 20 Relationships of all kinds are up for review with special attention paid to the disappointments of the past, especially your part in them. You have the opportunity to learn from your experiences and avoid needless power struggles. You also have the opportunity to reconnect with people and projects abandoned in anger.
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