SOJOURNER
TABLE of CONTENTS THE SUMMER EDITION | 2013 | ISSUE 2
TO BE A SOJOURNER 10 CALLED what is a sojourner, truly? SUMMER 12 AourMINNESOTAN cover shoot on Lake Minnetonka with lots of ice cream, splashing, and laughing
NEW YORK CITY 24 LIKE a prayer for our generation’s Christians -- to be like New York City
WORLDS TOGETHER 36 BRINGING building relationships + community by reaching out
WASN’T BUILT IN A DAY 38 ROME an empire of a business or a life isn’t built easily or quickly
// KENZIE KATE 48 INTERVIEWED she shares about her adventure to South Africa and the lessons God taught her from it
56 KISSES FROM KATIE // BOOK REVIEW Kristin Schmucker shares her review of this book by Katie Davis, a missionary in Africa
58 OH FACEBOOK
5 different girls. 5 different plans of action around Facebook.
68 WHAT I WANT YOU TO KNOW a letter to my someday daughter IN EVERY ISSUE
4 Letter From The Editors 6 Contributors 65 What We’re Up To
LETTER F T
his issue has been producing an eye opening experience for our need for God’s Sovereignty in all that we do. Contributors, prayer warriors, photo shoot models & coffee dates were the pieces that completed the puzzle to every detail behind this issue. Every encounter, spiritual leader & word has been ordained, chosen and brought to its completion, thus, leaving each and every one of us baffled. We are in awe of God’s grace on our weaknesses because He has provided ten fold. This is His hand at work in our sojourn. Our heart’s desire and prayer is that you would evidently find authenticity, beauty and a sense of movement in your heart from the impact of each article. More than anything, we are grateful 4 | Shine & Soar Magazine | Issue 2
for you. You inspire us, you are the pages of this issue, you are the push behind this movement, you are purposefully placed. Your challenges, your stories, your steps make this magazine happen.
we are finding a source of value and worth: Jesus. Apart from Him, we are useless.
Being confident in this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. // Philippians 1:6
We are gathering as a community of worshipers to dream and live a full, abundant life leading to completion in Jesus. Gently allowing for the Spirit to prompt us to action, fill our voids, build our hearts, and align our dreams with Jesus’. We do this to be a sweet aroma in the heavenly realms and a favor in the eyes of the Lord. To captivate the hearts of the lost, the broken, the ashamed, and needy. To respond to the need for Jesus and the need for our response to this worlds complacency. Convictions must
What are you seeking? Where are you walking to? Who are you surrounding yourself with? This is our sojourn. This world is pure white space waiting for us to create, motivate, encourage, and exasperate our need for self-ambition and pride to a halt. We are not walking alone. We are walking in step with the Spirit. Throughout this journey
Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the spirit. // Galatians 5:25
FROM THE EDITORS be bold and we pray that you would find hope as your eyes dive into this issue. We pray that you would be restored and pressed into the glory of the gospel. I am a wanderer, not a waiter. I anticipate, but rarely ponder. I progress & fight postponement, because today is being written & tomorrow is a dream anticipating to be sojourned.. We are breaking camp and launching into the light of His beautiful calling on our oh so fragile lives. We don’t have to be afraid or discouraged because He will fight for us, He will consume us, He will never abandon us. Once slaves, now purchased at the price of His redeeming blood, setup to be an inheritance at His right
hand. The Lord is with us in our wanderings here on earth, therefore we lack in nothing. Sojourning is not just about our wanderings with Jesus, but about our invitation as guests in the heavenly realms. Jesus has stepped in front and taken on the pouring out of our sins, death itself. We are now set free from prison, not to remain sulking over our once chained bones, but to step out, as set apart heirs of the King, clothed in His righteousness, fighting to expand His kingdom. That is our purpose. We are called to a more than to remain content and idle in our present sufferings and rejoicings, because while Jesus is always enough, we are to hold tight to His vast and zealous love. Good or bad, rich or poor, unwalled or fortified, Jesus is more than enough.
... O Sovereign Lord, you have begun to show to your servant your greatness and your strong hand. For what god is there in heaven or on earth who can do the deeds and might works you do?� // Deuteronomy 2:24 Jesus, may your spirit rest upon us and may you speak clearly into our lives. May the cloud of the Lord hover over us. Leading us boldly by day & consuming us with your fire by night. Like a new mother carries an infant in their arms, may your arms carry us through our lives. For Your arms are not too short and what You say will come true, because You are everlasting and truth itself.
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CONTRIBUTORS ELLIE BERRY Hello! I'm Ellie, a wedding and people photographer in Gaithersburg Maryland. I adore Jesus, and I love the color yellow, summer, and the beach (can you be a Cali girl without being born there?) Traveling and adventure are my favorite things. I love pretty clothes, fun TV shows (Psych!), and making things. I want to love people and live well and really experience life. My heart is knee deep in storytelling + photography. Chocolate is my fave, Washington D.C. is my town, and I love love. // Website: elliebe.com
SARA FACHETTI Sara Beth Fachetti is a blogger and creative entrepreneur who is passionate about ministering to girls about their worth in Christ and pursuing their dreams. Her perfect day would be filled with cuddles with her Yorkie, Toby, prayer time on the porch, a Hazelnut Frappuccino from Starbucks, and surrounded by everything hot pink + sparkly gold. // She blogs at hehassweetlychosen.me and sells handmade paper goods at etsy.com/sweetlychosengoods
KENZIE KATE FLOYD Hello! My name is Kenzie + I’m a sociology student, & wedding/portrait photographer living in southern California. It seems so strange to me to even give myself that “title” because I’m the last person on earth that would seem to have their life together. I’m scatter-brained, messy (I call it artsy), & indecisive. I love love, personality tests, reading all day, watching Netflix documentaries, and eating what my sister deems “weird” food. I experience & learn the most about God through people and their stories, which is why people are my absolute favorite and I’m so thankful I get to meet so many from all over this earth! // kenziekatephoto.com/blog
KAYTE GRACE Just four years after first picking up a guitar, Kayte Grace has been featured not only by The Washington Post and YouTube, but also by NBC and ABC in Georgia, The Augusta Chronicle, and Washingtonian Magazine. Kayte has released 3 albums and two singles and has songs playing on over 130 college & independent radio stations. She’s organized, booked, and self-promoted 3 national tours. Kayte has acted professionally for over fifteen years, in commercials and in television shows like Law & Order: SVU, HBO’s The Wire, and Gossip Girl. And now, Kayte Grace authors a five-chapter musical novel. “Set Fire to Separate Lives”. // kaytegracemusic.com 6 | Shine & Soar Magazine | Issue 2
HELLEN ROSIAH MARIE Hellen Rosiah Marie is a photographer & graphic designer from Tanzania currently living & studying in Minneapolis, MN. Prior to that she earned her Bachelors degree in Marketing from South Africa where she lived for four years. In 2012 she took the leap from the comfort of her home country & marketing job to pursue her lifelong passion of photography in Santa Barbara, CA where she attended SBCC to study photography. A semester later she transferred to Minneapolis to continue her studies and does freelance photography while pursuing a double degree in photography and graphic design. // Keep up with Hellen at rosiahmarie.tumblr.com
KILEY MARISSA Hey! I'm Kiley, a crazy sixteen-year-old living in Minnesota. I love adventure, writing, photographing, and finding joy in every day. I think one of the best things in life is sitting down at a coffee shop with a complete stranger and leaving best friends. "Fall down every night just to be picked up every morning. What an amazing King we live for." // Check out my blog at kileymarissa.com
HANNAH NICOLE Photographer, writer, believer. Lover of new moleskines (unlined, cahier), traditions, stories, a good vanilla latte. I’m happiest with a camera in my hands, making and eating food, creating something I care about, reading for hours, & being with my family. I adore polaroids, poetry, & the 2005 film version of Pride and Prejudice. I’m for red lipstick, deep laughter, possibilities, listening to your gut. I want to be a woman of grace. My guilty pleasures consist of superhero movies & cheesy romcoms, eating honey by the spoonful, & listening to the same song seventy two times. Seeker of grace gifts. // See more about Hannah at imhannahnicole.com
SARAH KOCI SCHEILZ Sarah Koci Scheilz is an inspiration-driven writer, communicator and catalyst. She’s saved-by-amazing-Grace work in progress and is learning what it means to be a child of God. Sarah has worked as a journalist, PR girl, nonprofit-eer and more. Today, she owns a freelance writing and communication company, Inspiration-Driven Communication. Passionate about community, Sarah loves connecting people and building relationships. Give her a cup of coffee and a cardigan and she’s happy. A lifelong Midwesterner, Sarah currently lives with her dashing husband, “Mr. S.,” in Kansas City, Missouri. // Visit Sarah at sarahkocischeilz.wordpress.com
KRISTIN SCHMUCKER I am Kristin! I am married to Jeremy and we have a precious little girl named Stella Grace. My husband and I are wedding photographers in Fort Worth, TX, and we are dedicated to capturing images that will be passed down from generation to generation. Though photography is what I do, my passion is for Jesus and my sweet little family. I have learned that God is Good, and when you seek Him, He will always be found. I love to see others grow closer to Him. // Keep up with her at her kristinnicoleblog.com Issue 2 | Shine & Soar Magazine | 7
SOJOURNER n. a temporary resident; someone who stays for a short period of time.
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CALLED TO BE A SOJOURNER T
his is a very temporary home. We need Him. We need Jesus. We need His love, His grace, His Mercy and His spirit in us every single second of our lives. We are sojourners- temporary residents. And as such, our lives are not our own. This time we have on earth is essentially a gift given to us, placed in our hands, for a small portion of eternity. We were created to glorify Christ. Instead of taking root in this world, take root, and find depth in Jesus. My genuine hope for this world is that we can help build a generation with an insatiable love for Christ. A generation that gets it. A generation that realizes we have been called to deeper, richer lives. Lives that must be lead and challenged by God, because depending on the world for any satisfaction or depth will fail. We are adventurers, lovers of the God who created all we hold dear, innovators, thinkers. We are imperfect human beings with a story greater than we could imagine. Never stop seeking, never stop thirsting for what is greater, for what is deeper, and for what can only be found in Christ‌‌. That is a sojourner- someone who is continually pursuing adventure, someone who lives their life with an insatiable thirst for Christ, and one who is continually broken & molded into His image. YOU GOD ARE MY GOD, EARNESTLY I SEEK YOU; I THIRST FOR YOU, MY WHOLE BEING LONGS FOR YOU IN A DRY AND PARCHED LAND WHERE THERE IS NO WATER. // PSALM 63:1 by Mackenzie Kern
never stop exploring
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innesotan summer Cover shoot on Lake Minnetonka Photographed by Bethany Aleshire + Mackenzie Kern // Models: Alex Anne and Ashley Green Issue 2 | Shine & Soar Magazine | 13
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Ta k e m e d e e p e r t h a n m y f e e t c o u l d e v e r w a n d e r .
LIK
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KE NEW YORK CITY A PRAYER FOR OUR GENERATION’S CHRISTIANS
Written by Kayte Grace Photos by Mackenzie Kern
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W
here are we going to live?” “New York City, duh!”
Even at six years old, playing house with my friends at recess on the jungle gym behind my tiny, Christian school, I knew where I’d end up. It was never an option for me (a suburban Maryland girl) not to live in New York City. Years later I was traveling back and forth between Maryland and New York City almost monthly, auditioning for and filming commercials and TV shows. The city was magic to me. It was promise and excitement. Intoxicating. A place you could go where a few people in a small room could change your whole life after a 60 second audition. Where you could go and film something that your friends and family would later gather to watch on NBC or HBO or the CW or see on the Jumbotron at a sports game in DC. A place where you could go to be on TV, rather than just watch it. To create, rather than consume. And six year old me was right. I did move to New York City. To attend Columbia University in 2007. And, of course, I stayed after I graduated. For the past three years since I’ve 26 | Shine & Soar Magazine | Issue 2
graduated, I’ve had my dream job as a full time singer/songwriter. This is all in the way of introduction. Hi, I’m Kayte. How do you feel about feasts? Oh good, I was hoping you’d say that. See, New York City is a feasting ground and 8.2 million people are invited to your party. It’s sumptuous and way too much. Last week I was riding the subway to go to a meeting at a cafe where I’d discuss the marketing plan for my new EPs. I sat down and looked over, laying on the seats, across four chairs was a person with hair, red lips and a push-up bra like a woman and a beard, legs and shoulders with Dora the Explorer socks and no shoes. Sleeping. Sleeping peacefully like a 6’5” angel. On the way out of the subway I saw Kristen Chenoweth, star of Wicked on Broadway, and a girl from America’s Next Top Model. On the sidewalk on the way to the cafe there was a guy gorgeously playing violin, wearing jeans, a flannel shirt and a taxidermied wolf head. A toddler walked by him, looked up, shrugged, and resumed his day. At the cafe waiting for my mocha and the man I was meeting a weatheredskinned homeless woman tried to
make off with someone’s drink that had been placed on the counter. The manager chased her out, caught her on the sidewalk and slapped the drink out of her hand. I circled the cafe long enough to find an empty seat, sat down and a man approaches me saying that his friend, a producer with studio space is looking for artists. Later on tonight I’ll have my every other week gig with my band on the Upper West Side where I’ll take over the cozy bar that’s become our home. Let it fill with friends, strangers and familiar faces, play several sassy folk songs, stopping to learn their names, what they’re drinking and who they’re dating between the verse and the chorus, cracking up, and wrapping the show to partake in an enormous dish of communal macaroni and cheese. The bar cook knows that when it’s the last song of our set, he should start making it. He also knows that we’ll need nine forks because we like strangers. We’ll stay til 1 a.m. even though it’s a Monday night and my band (two Christians, one Jew, one spiritual ex-Catholic), the bar manager and I will play hosts to all of our new friends. Male regulars are going to ask how I know the cute girls who
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came to see me play, to which I will smile and reply, “Church, it’s super fun and God always comes and you should come hang out on Sunday.” Then I’ll make introductions and everyone will start becoming friends. My drummer will make friends with a cellist and I’ll look up and see them jamming and everyone starting to dance. A sweet old Irish ex-rocker with a cowboy hat and a moustache will saunter over for a bite of mac and cheese and give a little feedback on the new songs we played tonight. I’ll ask about his family and tell him that I pray everything works out alright. During the 1:30 a.m. cab ride home my Muslim cab driver will first ask if I’m single, somehow find out I’m a Christian and we’ll engage in a chipper 10 minute theological joust. That’s what my days are like. New York City is sensuous, over-saturated and infested with fabulous, fascinating and at times even freakish people. Everyone knows the most important thing about a feast is the 28 | Shine & Soar Magazine | Issue 2
guest list. Get the right combination of people and you can spark something beautiful. Everyone will love it and no one will want to leave. Living in New York City is like living in a feast where God’s put together the guest list. I’ve met some of my greatest friends and the biggest supporters of my music, on the sidewalk. Once, when I was living in Harlem, I popped out of a cab in front of my apartment and in the 35 second space between the cab and my front door, a woman yelled out, “Hey are you a musician?!” We’ve since not only become great friends and had rich conversations about faith, the city and art, but she’s also booked dozens of shows for me, made countless introductions and we’ve even traveled to New Orleans together to perform. God is a great party planner. He knew we needed to meet and made sure we’d be on that same square of the sidewalk in the same 35 second window. Once I was busking in Union Square when a Johnny Deep meets Colin Farrell looking, long-haired, leather jacket wearing guy, lingered
to listen to what I was playing. We talked (he was a musician too), immediately became great friends and have been a support system for each other in a city where this career is hard. Once, when we first started hanging out he said, “You’re different from anyone I’ve met in New York. You just have this light.” It’s probably easy to freak out and panic and worry that you’re not meeting the right people, fast enough, but I’ve found that when I do my work and get something going, I look over and the people I need to meet are right there. Thanks God! Good lookin’ out. But a dinner party is nothing without eye-popping, mouthwatering food. This is where I feel I come in as an artist. If you think about it, every time I play a show I’ve served up something that people can gather around and consume. And if I play my cards right even though they may have initially come for the food, they can leave having made friends, having
had mind-bending conversations, having encountered delightful new view points and feeling lighter on their feet and less burdened by the city than when they came. The best moments for me as a musician are when someone in the audience comes up to me after the show and says, “I felt the exact thing you were singing about in the exact way you described it.” Or that the lyrics were somehow fresh or insightful or even just beautiful. This to me is a “mission accomplished” because I pray as I write music that God would literally give me the words, turns of phrases and melody lines that will cut with the crispness of familiarity into the hearts of people who listen. When it comes to art, vague things are flavorless food. To me the beauty is in the specificity and if Christian artists become masters at zooming in (or out) with unprecedented levels of insight into the human condition, more people will flock to our feasts and Issue 2 | Shine & Soar Magazine | 29
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more people will be satisfied by them. Side note: If you’re living in a place like New York City and you don’t kick butt at whatever you’re doing, you might as well move, because the rent you’re paying for a shoebox could buy you a single family home in a different state where you can go while you’re honing your craft. In New York City everyone is cooking something. What are you cooking? That’s what I keep asking myself. Once a little old Hispanic woman, in a power suit, got in a fight with me. I was back at Union Square singing to strangers outside the subway while a friend of mine who I’d met in the airport a year earlier did a live oil painting of me. I was singing my song “Country Boy” which is a bouncy, flirty, Swift-esque, nonautobiographical love song. Power suit lady called out, “You’re singing Christian song, yes?” “Oh! Nope. This one’s not Christian.” I smiled. “Yes, yes, Christian song, Christian worship song,” she insisted. To which I laughingly replied, “No this one’s actually about a boy, it’s about love.” To which she replied, “No, Christian song.” I said, “Well, actually I’m a Christian,” happy that someone had noticed. She looked contented and walked away. See, you don’t need to be singing Jesus songs for people to sniff out the Holy Spirit in what you’re doing. Which brings me to my final point: atmosphere. If there’s one challenge being an “artistic sojourner” in New York City, it’s fighting the feeling that you are an absolute ant. A speck. A barely perceptible blip. How can one girl, only 4” 10 ½”, with a tiny red Yamaha guitar exude an energy and create an atmosphere strong enough to strike someone’s heart in a storm of sirens, screaming, spiritual forces, subway screeches and the thunderous steps of thousands?
It’s like that scene in The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe where little Lucy is facing down an enemy army and wonders why they’re slowly backing away from her. Aslan, the great lion, has been standing behind her the whole time. And his presence was what the enemy army was responding to. I spend the day before each show praying that the Holy Spirit will fill up the place I’m about to play in. That He would sweep the atmosphere of whatever snootiness or closed-ness or barfight-ness existed there before. And that He’d bring raw joy and openness and conversation and love into the space and a sensation of His presence no matter how many boys I’m singing about. I don’t have to feel like a speck in the shadow of giants in New York City because the God who made the guest list is helping me set the mood. Just like the way the best feast hosts in any social circle begin to build a reputation, you stand out in a place like New York City by cooking up something great. And in order to thrive in this city and not be consumed by it, you need to decide in your mind what “great” means before you even get here (hint: “My food is to do the will of Him who sent me.”) The whole city is leaning forward; you can feel it on every block. Everyone’s sparking a movement, everyone’s building an empire, everyone’s gathering an audience, everyone’s racing up the mountain. And in that sense I think New York City has gotten something right. It makes me sad that we’ve (young Christians) become a generation of whiny, bloggers, who’ve sexified being cynical and have avoided needing bravery by making an occupation of undercutting movement, creators, and art Issue 2 | Shine & Soar Magazine | 31
producers. When a video or movement or initiative goes viral, I pretty much set a countdown clock and wait for the wave of blog posts from 20 and 30 something-s who say, “Well actually, this nonprofit effort to free the oppressed is flawed and ultimately unhelpful” or “This spoken word poem’s theology falls short of my unilaterally, skeptical, and impossibly thin strain of truth.”
My prayer for our generation’s Christians is that we’d be like New York City ... famous for what we’re for, what we cook up, for vision so fresh and compelling that the whole world races to follow suit, and for seeing constant gorgeous, miraculous transformation in our lives and the lives of our friends because we are in contact with the God of the Universe.
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“TELL ME, WHAT IS IT YOU PLAN TO DO WITH YOUR ONE WILD AND PRECIOUS LIFE?” - MARY OLIVER Issue 2 | Shine & Soar Magazine | 33
when oceans rise, my soul
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w i l l r e s t i n Yo u r e m b r a c e
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BRINGING
WORLDS TOGETHER Written by Sarah Koci Scheilz Photos by Janelle Putrich
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y campus minister in college loved to use the phrase “bringing worlds together.” Bringing worlds together is different backgrounds and different histories, different scars and different stories, unified. That’s community at its core. But one glance at my calendar today, that cluttered cacophony of meetings and appointments I call my life, and it’s anything but “bringing worlds together.” It’s fragmented. Particularly as entrepreneurs, we’re pulled in so many directions. Meeting with a client. Networking 36 | Shine & Soar Magazine | Issue 2
coffee. Volunteering at that organization. Cocktails with a lead. And then there’s a social shift. Coffee with a girlfriend from church. Book study with girls from church. Dinner with – you guessed it – friends from church. Like I said, fragmented. God built us in his image to crave unity, to crave that bringing worlds together. And so this fragmentation brings unrest to my heart and soul. That campus ministry, RUF (Reformed University Fellowship), was a case study in bringing worlds together. Sure, that community was
a little...assorted. Lovably offbeat -and completely phenomenal. And I’m a ragamuffin myself: I was an insecure, snack-sized freshman who spoke 100 miles an hour. In spite of it all, and perhaps because of it all, God brought me people who cared about my stories, and shared theirs with me.x I found a small group leader who would walk with me from my dorm, Mark Twain, to RUF events. I found girls who would pray with me — for me! And it was God like I hadn’t experienced Him before. When people said hello, I felt God chasing me. When people asked me to eat with them in the dining hall, I felt God pursuing me. Through those
of Christ, those differences don’t divide, they enhance. We appreciate differences, like Christ does us, and chase after community anyway, like Christ does us. You know, bringing worlds together. Community happens in pursuit, in chasing, in supporting, encouraging and loving well. And we’re called to do so in the world, not merely within the walls of the church. We’ve been built for something bigger than that.
men and women, I came to see who God is, feet-on-the-street. Just as Christ chases after us, the friends I made in RUF chased after me. Post-college, in the heart of the “real world,” there’s still that same yearning for community. But without flyers inviting us to meetings with free pizza, community is tougher to find. Instinctively, many of us start with church. Make no mistake: growing in the church community is meaningful, precious and critical to our souls. In loving each other well and serving each other practically, we show Christ to others and get to know Christ ourselves. But church community in isolation, community in fragments . . . well, that’s not quite what we’ve been
called to. In John 17:11, Jesus is about to go to trial and about to be crucified. It’s the night before all of that and he’s praying for his people. He calls us, particularly in 17:15 and 17:18, not to be out of the world, but in it. As God sent Jesus into the world, he sends us. So back to college: one of the greatest treasures of RUF was that it wasn’t my only community. That community gave me courage to stretch out and reach out and build relationships all over campus. I found connection in many places . . . through campus organizations, my freshman dorm, Greek Life, classes . . . every community a treasure in its own unique way.
As young women, as entrepreneurs, as Christians, we have many unique platforms through which we can build community. We can connect those we meet professionally with those we meet personally. We can build bridges past differences, so it’s no longer fragmented, but unified. Every relationship, every platform...they’re all mission fields for community. And in the meantime, as we work towards our calling to be in the world, to bring worlds together, perhaps a little unrest is okay. Our dissatisfaction, our yearning for unified community, keeps us hungering for Heaven and putting our stock there instead of the things in this world. By grace, we are saved. And by grace, we are free to chase, chase, chase, and spread God’s love through community, no matter where we are.
That blended community was evidence of how God orchestrates our stories. Under that umbrella
Community happens in pursuit, in chasing, in supporting, encouragingIssue and loving 2 | Shine & Soar well. Magazine | 37
ROME WASN’T
AN EMPIRE OF A BUSINESS OR LIFE ISN’T BUILT EASILY OR QUICKLY Written by Ellie Berry Photos by Mackenzie Kern
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BUILT IN A DAY
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P
eople ask, “How did you get followers? How did you get comments? How did you get more clients?” Honestly. I have no idea. Yeah, I worked at it and Jesus definitely has blessed my business. I wouldn’t be here without Him! But if I look back on the last four years, I can’t find a moment, or a day, where all of a sudden, I had followers! I had clients! It gradually happened. And now, I am consistently getting bookings. I am so grateful to Jesus for that. It’s kind of like that quote, “I fell in love slowly, and then all at once.” Except not with love, but with photography. ;) When I started my business as a 15 year old, I didn’t know what to do or how to do it. I just did it. I asked people if I could take pictures of them. I did a ton of free shoots. I posted about the most random things on my blog because I had no photos to post. Photography was my way of being creative, of letting people know how I saw the world. As I started getting more serious about the business side of it, I realized that it wasn’t all taking pictures and having fun. Have you ever been caught in the “vicious cycle” of knowing you need better equipment, but not having enough money to buy it, so you need photoshoots, but you need better equipment to really do a good job? Yeah, me too. I had always heard “rock what ya got” but my Nikon D80 that I had bought 40 | Shine & Soar Magazine | Issue 2
used and my 50 1.8 lens were not cutting it for me. My camera was slowly dying, I literally watched my photos get blurrier and blurrier as time went on. I remember crying in my parents room, and telling my mom that I wanted a better camera more than anything. That waiting was the hardest thing ever. My mom gently told me that waiting was hard. But that in God’s timing, everything was going to come together. And in that moment, I believed her and everything was okay! I wish. There were many more nights where I wished I could have better equipment, or more
jobs. I literally would cry out to God and ask Him to give me patience... or clients. Waiting was difficult, but I knew it was necessary. “If it’s going to happen, it will happen,” that was my theme. In 2011, I second shot a wedding with Kristen Morris of I’m Kristen Photography. That next month, I bought a Canon 5D with my hard-earned babysitting money (it took me a year to save up 80% of it, my parent’s graciously covered the rest). A few days after I got my new camera, I headed out to an three day internship with Kristen. I remember a moment during the internship where I knew, this is what I was going to be doing for the rest of my life. Jesus confirmed it in my heart and I was ready to take it on. That year I second shot with Kristen for ten more weddings, and in 2011, I began to think about doing weddings full time. I hit another “but-no-this-isn’thappening” wall when my mom’s 50 1.4 lens (that I had been borrowing) broke. It just, stopped working. I didn’t want to invest money into fixing it because I knew with that lens, it would probably break again. So I bought the 50 1.8 and dealt with the fact that I couldn’t go down to 1.4. Which seemed like a huge deal at the time. (Turns out, it’s not the big of deal. Surprise!) The fall of 2011, I booked maybe, three family shoots. I knew that I couldn’t keep doing this. I didn’t enjoy posing families and making
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We prayerfully wait, and keep walking through life. We try different doors, and sometimes kick down closed ones. We get our hands dirty.
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them smile, and then coming home and editing the pictures. I loved couples. Now, don’t get me wrong. I love families. I love the dynamic and the relationships formed in a family. I just didn’t like the way I was shooting them. Something had to change. But being a senior in highschool and running a business at the same time isn’t the easiest thing in the world. That’s another thing that held me back, my schedule. I couldn’t go off and do shoot any time I wanted to. School took up a big chunk of my time. More waiting? You got it. Spring of 2012 came and went. I bought a new lens which was a wonderful blessing. I had wanted to book three weddings, but I felt like it might be better to wait until after I was back from Guatemala (missions trip!). That way I could focus on that, and not worry about weddings, and booking, and photography in general. When I got home, I started marketing a lot more + I booked a proposal. Then, an engagement session. Now I have seven weddings booked. All because of Jesus and waiting for His perfect timing. This might seem like a jumbled timeline of my life through the last few years, but I hope you see the point. I didn’t just become a wedding photographer overnight. “Rome wasn’t built in a day.” Sometimes, we wait. We don’t sit around and wait, twiddling our thumbs, hoping God is going to drop something into our lap. We prayerfully wait, and keep walking through life. We try different doors, and sometimes kick down closed ones. We get our hands dirty. We trust Jesus that things will happen when He wants them to, which is always the right time. Building a business, and going from amateur to pro isn’t easy. But it’s not impossible either. Failures, successes, hard work, and amazing
experiences are all part of it. Part of the coolest job in the world. I wish I worried less and worked more. I wish I had figured out why I took pictures sooner. But do I have any real regrets? No. My journey is unique and it is exactly the journey God wanted me to have. Now, I am
a storyteller, telling the stories of unique and amazing people. So grateful to be living this beautiful life. It’s not always rainbows and unicorns. Actually, it’s never unicorns. But I am so blessed to be doing what I love. That’s a gift, and I don’t take that for granted.
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YOU CAN NEVER CROSS THE OCEAN UNLESS YOU HAVE THE COURAGE TO LOSE SIGHT OF THE SHORE.
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INTE KE 48 | Shine & Soar Magazine | Issue 2
ERVIEWED // ENZIE KATE A peek into her adventure in South Africa + the pieces of her heart she left behind.
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L
eaping into unknown territory, walking blinding, yet in step with the Spirit is a breathtaking site. Words truly do no justice to paint a picture of the heart of Kenzie Kate. Her stories will inspire you, change you, challenge you. In the messy, imperfect, challenge of international travel and mission, Kenzie shares her calling, her joys, her struggles & her honest transparent heart. We are honored to have her contribute her authenticity to this issue, let the spirit imprint a picture of self abandonment in your heart and open your eyes a little wider to His glory! What is the story behind your heart for Africa & what about it strikes a chord in your heart? I was totally that kid that dreamed of going to Africa. Probably part of that was selfish, romanticized ambition and the way that Africa is pushed (and is basically a clichÊ, unfortunately) in the Christian community. Nonetheless, I told my mom from a very young age that I wanted to be in Africa (as if it was a country not a continent). Hearing the stories of hurt, simplicity and beauty that seem to always come from Africa always resonated with me. I’ve always been someone 50 | Shine & Soar Magazine | Issue 2
that felt uneasy about western, American culture and have had a huge desire to experience different cultures. When I was a junior in highschool, I was on a team set to go to Uganda, but it was cancelled suddenly only a week before. I went through a huge season of just learning how to stay put, love those around me and wait for God to call me where I should go. One of the reasons I chose my university was for their South Africa program. I was super uneasy about applying. I did not want to go without God calling me there, I did not want to force anything or just go because it was the thing to do, but South Africa just kept popping up in conversations and something would shift in my heart just at the mention of it’s name. I ended up applying, being accepted, and living in South Africa from January to May of this year! What is the greatest obstacle you had to overcome on your adventure to Africa? Hands-down the hardest thing for me was dealing with my privilege while faced daily with the inequality, racism and poverty in South Africa. South Africa has the greatest discrepancy between rich and poor, so there are literally
the richest people in the world living minutes from some of the poorest slums. I cannot even begin to describe my frustration with my own need for comfort, my desire to break away from the individualistic, western “American Dream” mentality I was raised in, and how to handle my own privilege. I was really just trying to figure out how to really live like Jesus in light of being from an environment (and industry) that tells me to seek success, wealth and security. I had a lot of internal battles with these things and they are still something that I am earnestly seeking resolve for. Isn’t that just life, though? Constantly being challenged and shaped by experiences in an attempt to be more like Jesus? I don’t think there is a destination for that one. It’s definitely a journey
and I’m really thankful for those hard days because they shaped and are shaping me in huge ways. What was your favorite meal/ beverage in Africa? Oh boy! Sometimes I feel like all we did in South Africa was eat. There was this bread called Zulu that was so good! Zulu bread days were always the best days. One of our favorite ladies, Nomvula, would make it in a huge pot, cut these fat slices and feed us all. She would fry the extra dough into little balls, called Fat Cooks, which were out of control carby goodness! South Africa also, surprisingly, has the largest Indian population outside of India, so when we were in the city I grew quite the liking for curry and naan. Mmm.
What life lessons did you take away from living in South, Africa? Oh, so many. I cannot change the world. There were a lot of helpless days where we just had to realize that things are out of our hands and control. I learned that I need to put my trust in Jesus, that my small actions and intentions and tiny contributions were part of his plan, and would be used for his glory. It was also super crazy to see how much influence America has, both positively and negatively. Our actions and the way we represent ourselves affects the world around us, whether we want them to or not. Did the Lord change your view of the world/people? If so how? People are people and they are so much more than the pictures
Challenging. Unexpected. Magical. Beautiful. Confusing. Adventure. GO. Issue 2 | Shine & Soar Magazine | 51
I can show you or stories I can tell you. That has been one of the hardest things since coming home. South Africa is not just stories. Nomvula is probably waking up right now and preparing food for all of her neighbors. Andiswa and Sne are maybe in school, or running crazy around RivLife picking flowers or picking fights. I was able to get a glimpse into the real lives of people and their families and for that I am so grateful. Obviously their lives and stories don’t stop now that we aren’t there. They aren’t just pictures I can put in my albums. I had so many realizations of just how small the world is, how people are people are people are people (and we all struggle with the same things) and how desperately we all need Jesus. Whether we live in LA, Tokyo, or South Africa. What impacted you the most while you were there? Something we always talked about was how we felt like we were experiencing things we had always known. The different things we participated in at our service site, RivLife, like home visits and HIV support group left a huge impact on me. Seeing firsthand poverty, sickness and abuse was really hard and still deeply affects me. It made me feel really small and helpless, and just like “woah, Jesus do something here, because I can’t.” What where some of the most joyful, memorable & honest moments you had in Africa? Surface/adventure-y favorite things would be: Safari! The most magical thing of my life, holy smokes. Overcoming fears with bungee jumping (craziest thing of my life), I loved the Indian ocean, I loved living in the city for our last month, taking the train, participating in homestays and creating friendships with the other people in my program. Easter weekend was the best! There were 50ish of us in our program, and a huge part of my time in South Africa was intense community building and just growing in relationships with 52 | Shine & Soar Magazine | Issue 2
each other on campus, which was so fun. On Good Friday we had a huge Slip n’ Slide on the front lawn and finished it out with a giant mud fight and pictures in the waterfall. So picturesque, I know! On Sunday’s, we were given the opportunity to bring lunch and hang out in one of the local slums. For me, it was the most perfect picture of how Jesus loves his children and just one of the most beautiful days I’ve ever experienced. What has been your greatest struggle since coming back into the states? There were the silly, little, things, like toilet seat covers and no Tea Time twice a day, or being overwhelmed with millions of options that took small adjustments at first. The greatest struggle, though, has definitely been processing/
attempting to articulate my four months there. I’ve heard “How was Africa?” thrown around 685093 times in the last two months and have had to discern who to tell what, and how much to tell. There have been days when I’ve been completely overwhelmed with the individualistic, technology addicted, “social media obsessed culture” that is home and have deeply missed the simplicity and real life and adventure (outside of instagram and facebook and phones and plans) that I found in South Africa. What words would you use to describe your sojourn in South Africa? Challenging. Unexpected. Magical. Beautiful. Confusing. Adventure. GO.
Could you see yourself returning to Africa? If so where do you see its placement in your future? Please, please, pretty please!! I would love to. At this exact moment in my life, I don’t think God is calling me to live in Africa full-time. I think that’s a very specific calling and I don’t want to claim it if it isn’t something God wants for me. I do know that I love South Africa and African culture and adventure and would love to return. I think it is crucial to challenge ourselves and step out of our comforts and experience different people and cultures. South Africa holds a very large and hefty place in my heart and in my story; and it was an experience that is still changing me in huge ways.
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I learned that I need to put my trust in Jesus, that my small actions and intentions and tiny contributions were part of his plan, and would be used for His glory.
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KISSES FROM KATIE
// book review by Kristin Schmucker
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F
or several months it seemed like I kept seeing this book everywhere. I saw it every time I logged on to instagram or Facebook and every time I stepped into a bookstore. When I finally decided to buy a copy and read it (which I did in a matter of two days), I did not know how much it would change my heart and my perspective on life. I don’t think you can read this book and not have your heart changed for the need around you. The book is the autobiography of a young woman named Katie Davis, who went to spend a year doing mission work in Uganda in between graduating highschool and beginning college and never came back. She stepped outside of her comfort zone to do something that was important, and never looked back. While reading this you can't help but sit back and think about what really matters in life, and how easily we are distracted by things that don't really have meaning.
always say yes when He prompts an action. I walked away wondering what would happen if we all really lived like Jesus would? This quote from the book broke my heart: “The truth is that the 143 million orphaned children and the 11 million who starve to death or die from preventable diseases and the 8.5 million who work as child slaves, prostitutes, or under other horrific conditions and the 2.3 million who live with HIV add up to 164.8 million needy children. And though
at first glance that looks like a big number, 2.1 billion people on this earth proclaim to be Christians. The truth is that if only 8 percent of the Christians would care for one more child, there would not be any statistics left.� Walking away from this book I couldn't help but feel changed. I had to stop and realize how insignificant some of the things that we chase after really are and how the only thing that truly matters is serving the Lord and loving people.
Now in her early twenties she runs a non profit organization and has adopted 14 children. She is living proof that anyone can make a difference in this world, and in the lives of others. Seeing her heart for those around her is incredible, and hearing the things she has faced is such a reminder of how much we take for granted. Above all, I was so impressed with her heart for God and her willingness to keep saying yes to Him, even when it was hard. It started with things that seemed so small and she obeyed, and now God has used her greatly for her obedience in the small things. How often do we shrug off the desire to help the homeless or those that are hurting around us? This book has shown me that I should seek to be open to the Spirit's leading and Issue 2 | Shine & Soar Magazine | 57
OH FACEBOOK
5 DIFFERENT GIRLS. 5 DIFFERENT PLANS OF ACTION AROUND FACEBOOK.
Edited by Bethany Aleshire Photos by Mackenzie Kern
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f you don’t have a Facebook, be it for yourself or for your business...well you pretty much don’t exist. Bold statement, huh? Or maybe not so bold. Facebook has become an integral part of our lives + existence...and mainly all social media in general. “You should tweet that! Did you post that on Instagram? That was a sick Vine.” Now, we’ve all heard everything about social media and how it’s ruining our social abilities, how much time we spend on it, or how to use it for our businesses, and on and on. But I wanted to show you 5 different ladies and how they recently decided to do something different (or not) with their Facebook. Soak up their stories and perspective and ponder and pray over how your Facebook usage is going. If you should make a change or not, and if so, which of the options we show here you should take. You’ve got a tangle of reasons to keep + ditch Facebook. You’re a business owner, but yet you’re a Christian and Jesus needs to come first in everything, but also this is a time in life where your social net is expanding big time. Oy vey, what to do. Well, hear how 5 different ladies are handling all those obligations in regards to their Facebook. 60 | Shine & Soar Magazine | Issue 2
1 // Taking a Break Bethany Aleshire
Why did you deactivate your Facebook? I was spending so much time keeping up with other’s “amazing” lives + accomplishments that my life wasn’t taking priority. I was just connecting online with people and not in person. It was time to stop the train and go cold turkey on Facebook in order to focus on what really mattered. Pros: Realizing that life went on without Facebook + I was still a living person without it *gasp* Haha. But the freedom (and the feeling of being a bit of a rebel) of not reading the drama that a lot of people post about every single day + just able to do my life, with the people I
intentionally seek out + seek out me, and for myself, not for an ego boost of sharing that I just hung out with so-and-so or had a gorgeous meal on Facebook. It was for me to savor + relish + remember real life. Cons: Not easily being able to manage my business pages and missing people’s birthdays. How is it like not having a Facebook? Good...for now. I went off of it knowing I’d be back later once I got my grounding (even though earlier on, I contemplated entirely deleting it). I do kind of miss having a platform to quickly share some
2 // Back from Break Kiley Marissa
Why did you deactivate your Facebook for 3 months? I decided to de-activate my facebook in March of this year when I realized my life was empty. It was filled with comparison, insecurity and not knowing who I was. I hit a time in my life where I truly didn’t know who or what I was standing for anymore. I decided it was time for a break from a lot of things in my life, starting with social media. Pros: I didn’t have to always see what I was missing, which was amazing. I felt like I could go on with my life and not feel like I was missing out on things. I also had nothing to compare to. I was me, and there was nothing that I saw that was better than that.
was a little sad to be missing out on all of the people who were posting their pictures on there, but it wasn’t a big deal. That’s what blogs are for, right? How is it like being back? I actually have my facebook back now. I took a 3 month break, and it was wonderful. I feel like the break helped me break the facebook addiction, so I definitely don’t go on as much, and if I need another break, it won’t be hard to take. I definitely recommend a break every once and awhile, even if it’s just a week.
Cons: Being a photographer, I
encouragement/excitement with others, but I’m realizing more and more that I need to do that on my blog first. I’ll probably be reactivating it when school starts and I will be too busy to waste time on it.
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3 // Personal to Biz Sara Fachetti
Why did you change your FB situation? I converted my personal Facebook profile to a business page (which eliminates your news feed, invites, and chat) because I was becoming increasingly discouraged when viewing my news feed. I either read through things that seemed pointless or negative to me; or things that touched upon my easy ability to fall prey to jealousy and insecurity. In reality, I probably only had real friendships with about 100 of my 500 friends. I didn’t feel it was adding any value to my life anymore. I presumed that eliminating my Facebook profile would mean I would be more motivated to initiate in-person interactions with my local friends instead of just leaving them a comment or “like” on their page, thus growing and deepening my relationships. I’d spend thought time on trying to craft the perfect status and deciding which details of my life to share! Life was created to be spent and given away for the sake of God’s Kingdom and glory, and well, how am I doing that by worrying about
creating a witty status to get a few “likes” or by trying to convince people that I’m actually really cool? But I swear. I am. Pros: I do not waste hours of my time observing other people’s lives instead of living my own life. I am protected from being caught up in my emotional weaknesses and vulnerabilities (jealousy and insecurity). I think I have poured into the local friendships more. I truly don’t miss my news feed at all! Also, because I converted my personal profile into a business page (since I am a blogger and
entrepreneur and still needed a social media connection to the people who had been my “friends”), I started considering everything I thought about posting on Facebook in a much more discerning scrutiny. I hardly post about myself at all unless it’s something funny (goodbye, narcissism!) or might be meaningful to others. Other than that, I post updates related to business, blogging, and God. Cons: I miss the big group invites to parties and other events. However, those big parties are also the types of events that I, due to my
personality type, really only enjoy going to every once in a while. I love having something big and exciting to participate in on occasion, but I value opportunities to have more real and honest conversations with people even more. Thus, my social life has been a little quieter, but it is challenging me to get out of my comfort zone and pursue people more passionately. I’ve considered creating a new, personal profile simply for the purpose of not missing the Facebook invites and only adding my nearest and dearest, but truthfully, I don’t have any desire to do so. How is it like being where you are FB-wise: Hands down – I LOVE IT. And I wouldn’t change my decision AT ALL. My recommendation, however, is that you carefully consider why you want to make a change, the possible repercussions, and whether or not those will gel with your goals and your personality – for instance, the decreased number of invites to social gatherings may not be for everyone – but that worked with my personality, my goals, and my emotional needs as well.
4 // Transitions Hellen Rosiah Marie
Why did you change your FB situation: I recently converted my personal Facebook profile into a Facebook business page, and then started a new personal account, in order to increase my reach and engage with more people on my business page. When I started my business page and began sharing my work, I noticed that the reach per post was very limited. Consequently, I shared the same post on my personal page and it received greater attention than the original post on my business page. Also, only about a quarter of my Facebook friends had initially liked my business page. Pros: I have saved a lot of time by not having to share the same content twice; once on my business page and then on my personal page. Everything is now done on my business page and thus, I can interact with everyone without having to go back and forth switching between accounts. Also, the audience is now bigger, the reach is higher than before, according to the page stats. Cons: Tagging! Everything else is dandy! Facebook pages do not allow you to tag someone unless you are friends with them on your personal profile so I still have
to tag people and clients by first friending them on my personal page. How is it like being where you are FB-wise: It’s great because I feel much, much more engaged than ever before, and I feel my work is reaching more people.
5 // Always Had One Sarah Delanie
Why have you remained active on Facebook? Personally, I have always enjoyed the journey of learning how to “ bein-the-world-but-not-of-it”. Aside from the social networking benefits Facebook presents, the majority of my closest friends & family all live out of state. Therefore, Facebook has presented a beautiful outlet for me to stay connected & still feel like I semi know what is happening in their lives, even if it is on a surface level. I have found that my account has given me great opportunities to share my faith & encourage others. Facebook was also a large contributor to my photography business launching & I find that I personally have more interaction and opportunities for “word of mouth” referrals because of it. If I
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am being completely honest, I do not always believe “deactivating all social media” is the answer to “cultivating a beautiful life”. Social media opens a multitude of doors to speak into the lives that are consumed with what I like to call “social media diarrhea”. Go ahead, it is okay to giggle. I believe it is finding balance. If that means you need to step away from Facebook for a little while, then do it, but you just may be missing out on a huge opportunity to change a life, without ever knowing it. At the end of the day, I think the big question is “Are you walking in step with the Spirit?” If your eyes are fixed on Jesus, all else falls into place. Please do know, this is just my personal conviction and who knows that could change. If we live our lives by other peoples convictions, I believe that can put us in a very scary place. I encourage you to seek the Lord for guidance & listen to His whisper of a voice, allow Him to cultivate Facebook in a way that refreshes you & others, without controlling who it is He designed you to be. Pros: Networking benefits, business opportunities, staying in touch with 64 | Shine & Soar Magazine | Issue 2
family and friends that live out of state. It is a place for me to portray my art & share words that move me. Cons: It is different for everyone. Facebook can be addicting, because it is “of the world” & can skew your vision of your identity & off set your personal priorities. It can become a dangerous outlet when not used properly. Once information, images and statuses are posted, they are on the internet forever, hence, why you must be wise what you post. Facebook is not your journal or diary and not everyone wants to know when you are pooping or eating, keep it separate. How do you balance life and Facebook? Boundaries. It is okay to TURN
IT OFF. I think this hit me most when the Magazine first launched, within minutes of launching my notifications went on super-warpoverload! I told myself to turn it off & walk away. When I meet friends for coffee or lunch, or am having family time, I set it aside. You have to analyze your priorities. I believe my relationship and growth in the Lord takes first priority. I want to invest in my family & cultivate a loving relationship with them & serve them in the best way I possibly can. I want to be intentionally invested in my close friends & in the young girls I mentor. I never want my “Facebook” to define me or become a label of who I am. In these moments, Facebook is an outlet & opportunity and I am very thankful for it, but I am making a choice to use it wisely & not foolishly.
WHAT WERE UP TO // what we’re currently loving
BETHANY
CIERA
...is listening to: Mark Driscoll Who Do You Think You Are sermon series and top summer hits.
...is listening to: Change your World sermon series online at Church of the Highlands & Hello My Old Heart by The Oh Hello’s
...is reading: not a fan. by Kyle Idleman and Fresh Air by Chris Hodges. ...is loving: My new Simplified Planner with Emily Ley sheets + Lara Casey powersheets. It’s amazing to have all my ideas + to do’s + crazy life details all in one beautiful place!
...is reading: The Luminous Portrait by Elizabeth Messina. ...is loving: My new turquoise + brown sunglasses from Target!
SARAH
MACKENZIE
...is listening to: “Set A Fire” by: Reagan & the United Pursuit, “Darkness Falls by: The Assemblie
...is listening to: Of Monsters and Men & All Sons and Daughters.
...is reading: “You Lost Me. ” by: David Kinnman
...is reading: Seven by Jen Hatmaker.
...is loving: My new Rifle Paper Company journals, swooning over here.
...is loving: My pointy, patent red flats from Madewell & a handmade journal I was given while on a trip to Jamaica.
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ONE’S DESTINATION IS NEVER A PLACE, BUT A NEW WAY OF SEEING THINGS. - HENRY MILLER
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WHAT I WANT YOU TO KNOW
A LETTER TO MY SOMEDAY DAUGHTER by Hannah Nicole
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Dear little girl, this is what I would say to you...
Y
ou are a sojourner. You are a lover. You are a warrior. You are a woman. All your life, you've seen examples of women who exemplify what it means to be so -- the seeming dichotomies of strength and gentleness, humor and wisdom, sassiness and humility, laughter and mourning. All of this, beauty and grace, and each one, gifts. Some women are short. Some are tall. You know all this already. Some women are lovely in heart and plain in face. Others are lovely in face and plain in heart. It doesn't make much sense according to the world's measuring stick of beauty, but remember…it's not your face that defines who you are. The women lovelier in heart are more wildly beautiful than society's shifting mirage of beauty. Your figures, your fortunes, your features, friendships, and even your feelings do not comprise the beautiful, blinking, breathing, being; you. There is ugliness and pain and grief. In this world, you will see and experience brokenness louder 70 | Shine & Soar Magazine | Issue 2
than shattered glass, things worth crying over more than spilled milk, missed buses, and waking up too late. I cannot guarantee you will not have days that bruise your heart. I cannot guarantee you will not have scars that don't fade as quickly as cuts from falling out of trees or splinters eased out of bare feet. I cannot guarantee you will not taste blackness and see darkness. I wish I could take all the ugliness and duskiness that stings worse than lemon on a paper cut. I wish I could pretend it doesn't exist. I wish that I could be your shield. But what I can do and will do, is better. I promise to teach you to fight. To show you the strength you need to do so comes not from your own striving -- that in your weakness, you are strong. That in your brokenness, you are whole.; You are carried. It is beautiful and it is pleasant, but this world is not your home. You are not a settler. You are marking your paths and journeying through the tangled towns and cities. You will have to make choices that determine the course you take and
influence the trail others follow on. Some decisions will be easy; what to wear for school, toast or cereal for breakfast, which movie to see. Others will be harder, decisions that will take all you have out of you, decisions that will make you wonder if you chose the right path. Sometimes there is no right decision; there is no set course. All I can say is look to Jesus first. Align your heart with Jesus, and listen. Wonder. Pray. And go forth boldly, bravely, intentionally. Mark up your maps like only you can and keep a travel log of your story, keep pressing on and pressing in. Further up, and deeper in. I promise to help you love well and richly, even when the world tastes blue, metal and bitter like tea steeped too long in your mouth. I promise to show you Jesus. I promise to not pretend that I'm perfect. I promise to admit when I'm wrong. I promise to cry with you over your first heartbreak and to remember what it felt like, not to brush it off with, “you'll get over it” or “you'll be fine”. Your grief is my
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grief, your joy, my joy. I will be your mother, but also your friend. I will encourage you when you are smarting and throbbing, I will push you when you are drifting into doldrums. I will live intentionally and purposefully and honestly with all I have, so that you will learn by example, not just word. I will be gentle and kind towards my body, even if I feel less than so, and I promise to say that I am beautiful and believe it. I will tell you that you are beautiful and lovely everyday. I will make sure to tell you that you are beautiful and lovely because of your personality, your joys, your kindness towards others, your heart. I will help you be a scholar instead of a smart-aleck, I will do my best to foster a love of learning in you that goes beyond the classroom and weekly exam. I promise to say yes when you ask to help make chocolate chip cookies, homemade pizza and pancakes, even if it means flour all over the kitchen and breakfast at noon. I will let you stay up and see midnight premieres of movies and I will take you on adventures. I will tickle and tease you, take care of you with all the strength, beauty, bravery and feeling a woman is born within her
heart. Some people will love you and they will make the world dear. A place that sparkles and tastes like melted vanilla ice cream, smothered in strawberries. They will be bright pieces; polished like gold in a world tarnished with imitations; dented coppers and bruised bronzes. They will give you hope. They will bring you joy. They will build you up. Invest in these people, these relationships, their stories, hopes and hearts. Do not be afraid of saying the wrong thing so much that you say nothing. Do not be afraid of saying you're wrong or you're sorry, because you will be. Sometimes you will be so achingly sorry that your very bones will throb with accusations that you will never measure up again. I want you to take those voices and put them in a box. Label it junk, mark it with a big X, stamp it with the words, ”lies I'm not listening to anymore” on the crumpled cardboard. Fold it up, then send it far away. Let it burn in a bonfire and watch the smoke rise and breath in the clear night air. Let go of the lies as easy as a fire lets go of it’s smoke and
turn your eyes to Him, align your heart with the truth. Give each and every lie that says you are not enough to Jesus. Cry over them if you have to. You are not weak because you cry. You are not weak because you feel. You were made beautifully and preciously. Your feminine heart was created to feel deeply. Place each and every lie and every fear at the feet of Jesus, let them go. You are not meant to carry them. It is baggage on your journey; your voyage home. You have no room to be lugging boxes of junk that are not even yours as you pass through this world. It is because of Jesus’ grace in your life that you are enough. You are brilliant, talented, sweet, funny and unique. You have your own flavor, personality and beauty. Despite all this, some people will not like you. For whatever reason, you will be oil and they will be water. Sometimes you will make these people cry, sometimes these people will make you cry. Forgive them because Christ first forgave us. They have mothers who love them and fathers who are proud of them. They have sisters who adore them and brothers who enjoy Issue 2 | Shine & Soar Magazine | 73
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They have grandparents who think they're the bees knees and cousins who like nothing more than spending summers with them. They have aunts who spoil them and uncles who tease them, friends who they've known since birth and friends they met just last week. They have second cousins and great-uncles in Texas and halfsiblings who live halfway across the world. They have one parent, two parents, step-parents, foster families; people, all unique, who love them. They are good people too. Don't hold onto grudges so long they leave ink on your hands. You are not meant to be marked by anything more than Christ's love in you; for you. Your identity is who you are, not what others say about you. Forgive people, be kind to people, love people well, even when it’s hard. Learn to let go. Dear girl, with a smile that will make my heart skip and hair that I will braid, plait, put in pigtails, brush the tangles out of as easily as I wish I could smooth your heart wrinkled with living. You are lovely. Not because of what you say or do, but who you are. I will tell you that over and over until you believe me, I will pray that my words penetrate deep into your soul and color your thoughts about yourself and others. That you would listen to my message; because of who Jesus has claimed you to be. That you would close the door to the ugly, crippled, blatant lies that the world whispers. I will not lie. I will not pretend it will be easy. The world's
greatest secret is that it knows your worth is found in Christ‌and so it pretends you are not enough. It screams it. Sometimes, louder than others. It messages you saying you need a thinner waist, clearer face, better hair. It tells you that you need more -- a boyfriend, trendier clothes, cuter home, more friends, an audience, talents, fame, riches. More and more and more. Not all of these things are bad, but when they become expected, sole goals, entitlement or dismay, hurt creeps in because of them. They are too much. When they become more than who Christ says you are; they are too much. Loving God, deeply, richly, completely; loving His people in all their bittersweet brokenness, beautiful hope and tender humanity. Pursuing passions placed on your heart, whether that means becoming a brain surgeon or a prima ballerina, a cook dealing with caviar and champagne, or an artist speckled in paint. If that means a lawyer, a musician, a banker, a mother. Whatever you were created to do, passionately and beautifully, do that. The Lord is faithful to fulfill the desires He places on your heart. Seek Him first, and see your desires; your dreams, unfold in the truth of who He created you to be. Dearest darling girl of my own, I pray you live to the very breadth of who you are with less attachment to stuff and more expectant joy. Radical gratefulness and wild recognition to gifts of grace. I pray that you see and deeply treasure
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them as they come. That you would hold a higher value on last day sunrises at the lake, traditions that carry you through hard years, the perfect shade of yellow, movie nights with your siblings (even if you've seen the Disney film a hundred times), the first strawberry of the season, belly laughter with friends, playing games at the table, freckled skin and sandy feet from the sea. Whatever it is that makes your heart skip, makes your soul sing, makes you you.(,) Gives you joy. (;) The good things, the full things, the true things, the gifts from God that are pure and lovely and good -- focus on those things. Make your life about loving God, loving His people, pursuing your unique talents and dreams, and enjoying -- richly, lavishly, extravagantly, the simple grace gifts He gives. Make your story about being brave and simple and true. Forget trendy. Forget famous. Forget worth placed on you by anyone other than Jesus. I will sing it until you are deaf, my voice is gone and my words ring thick as a hundred year old oak‌ you are enough. You can be strong and gentle. You can cry and laugh. You are not irretrievably broken, you are not ever a failure, you are never a
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disappointment. You will sing and fly and dance until you are dizzy and full of relief, joy, contentment. Hold those times close to your spirit, they are precious, they matter, they are needed. There will be times you will miss a step, skip a chorus, make up a verse. You will twist your ankle, lack the right words and lose your place. I will still love you, I will still fight for you, I will still believe in you. And I will still tell you you are enough. That is what this letter is about. That you will simply know, because of Jesus, you are enough. Whether you are quiet or loud, introverted or extroverted, dark haired or light haired, tall or short, plump or thin, athletic or not at all, artistic or analytical, practical or a dreamer, a music lover or a math adorer, you are enough. Your dimpled face and freckled nose, sassiness and tender heart. Whatever you will be and whoever you become, you are enough, you are beautiful, you are loved, more deeply and fully by your Creator than I could ever even hope to begin to convey. This is my prayer for you. That you will love well, to the deepest part of you. That you will give extravagantly, to your very
last reservoir. That you will bless, with all you have. That you will be brave enough to cry, to admit you're wrong, to admit you're right, to stand by what you believe. That you will listen to your gut. I hope you will laugh long and loud and lovely. I hope you will know when to mourn, I hope that you will let your grieving and griefs knit you tighter to Him. I pray that you will
create and learn and enjoy this wild and precious life, that you will work hard and know that too, is a gift. That you will live well. That you will be who you are; your unique self, your God-given you-ness that is so radical and free. I pray that you will remember this world is not your home, that you are given shoes to walk in it for a season. That you will remember to mark in pencil scratches on your roadmap and to jot down notes in your moleskine journal, whether you prefer it unlined, lined, or with graph paper. This earth is a lonely place, but it doesn't have to be so. There is good, there is beauty, there is joy. It is all a journey to home -- your real home. Not the red front door you grew up with, or the trees that make up your state, or the first apartment or the last apartment, or the cabin you spent your summers at. Your real home, your real life, is hidden in Christ. Someday, the veil will be lifted, fully, and you will see like never before. There will be a day when goodbyes are no more, and what a day that will be. Remember,
you are passing through, you are more, you are enough, you are a daughter, you are a sister. you are a friend. You are a woman, you are His. That is what makes you beautiful. It makes you shimmer
like a lake caught in sun and makes your laughter like glitter and music in the air. It makes your heart glow, soar and sing. Remember that, forever and ever and always. Issue 2 | Shine & Soar Magazine | 77
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Set your course by the stars, not by the lights of every passing ship. -Omar N. Bradley
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