PARENTING
THE STRUGGLE TEACHING
YOUR CHILDREN SELF-CONTROL WRITTEN BY T.E. CUNNINGHAM
A
s adults, we have faced the challenge of self-control many times—at work, with a friend, in romantic relationships, and with family. The struggle is “real,” as they say. So how do we teach our children self-control when we may not have it mastered? A child’s struggles with self-control may seem less serious—don’t have two pieces of cake, don’t play your Xbox all night, don’t flip out on a friend who bought the same outfit as you. However, it’s still the same skill set practiced at this age that will carry them through life. As such, it’s never too early to work with your child. According to Scientist Magazine, a 40-year study of 1,000 children revealed that childhood self-control strongly predicts adult success—in people of high or low intelligence, in rich or poor. Having a good grasp on self-control can not only help kids stay healthy, both mentally and physically, but it can also
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SIMPLYkc MAGAZINE
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DECEMBER 2021
help them maintain better friendships, be closer to family members, and relate better to teachers and other community members. The first step in mentoring your child is to talk about self-control and why it is essential. At a young age, examples of self-control in action may help cement understanding. For instance, you could tell your child a story about something a coworker did at work that upset you. Talk about the fact that you did not: •S peak negatively about the coworker to anyone else • Speak to your manager about the issue • Lash out at the coworker Instead, you: •C ooled down until you were no longer upset • Asked the coworker respectfully to have a private conversation when it was convenient • With carefully chosen words, let them know what was upsetting you and tried to find a resolution that would make both of
