Issue 5: Black + White

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SISU Pronounced see’-soo. A Finnish term embodying the spirit of grit, guts, and perseverance. Sisu represents a human being’s ability to face any adventure riddled with hardship, hopelessness, and impossibility, yet they still choose to stay the course.

It’s not a temporary state of courage, it’s a way of life.

SISU MAGAZINE A collection of uninterrupted stories, brilliant photographs, and stunning art that evokes the indomitable human spirit that exists in all of us. An exploration into the experiences and perspectives about the outdoors, told by our contributing writers, photographers, and artists who represent a bold, insightful collective voice.

f r o n t a n d b ac k cov e r art wo r k by w yeth m os s

.... re cultiva ceiving impe te r to judg grace and h fect apologies umility e other helps . s that sa me bin for their faul I should be sl us d next ow ts, lest be)... W ti it to keep hat we are o me (which it be me in w w going a re not a ed and what ill likely we l ways th why e same need we n e e d im things. p e r fe ct a p o lo

CONTENTS 6 why we need imperfect apologies I’m Sorry by Frances Lee The pitch

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Building an Inclusive Community in the Backcountry with Eastern Sierra Conservation Corps

12 ask jenny

Questioning Your Worth by Jenny Bruso

g ie s Pag e 6

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guardians

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i did it because it was fun

Artwork by Wyeth Moss

A Lookback on Skiing with Kim Reichhelm by Jennifer Gurecki

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roller skiing to the top Creating New Life by Charlotte Massey

an indoor girl on the outdoors Soul Sludge by Melanie Briggs

the great urban outdoors

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Mappy Hour wuth Sarah Knapp

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dream or delusion?

Travel Influencer

Truth by Erika Fitzgerald

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hemp takeover

Fuel Your Adventure by

Erica Zazo

20 how to soak and shred the 64 eastern sierra Road Tripping by Jenn Sheridan

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What’s in our rack

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brotherhood of skiing

Packing it In

66 Changing Mindsets by Faith Briggs

connections

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old habits die hard Winter SelfPreservation by Samantha Romanowski

The Landscape and Trans Bodies

nature never Misgendered me Finding Acceptance in the Mountains by Jennifer

poetry in motion Who Am I? by Lynne Schmidt

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by Lou Bank

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How Not To Be A Climate Change Activist Like A Basic Bitch Where Race and Travel Intersect by Kiona

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DIY

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marketplace

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eat, drink, + be merry

A Project with Jamon Wolfe Shop It

Gurecki

for the love of snow

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Cranberry

Bliss Bars by Vanessa Barajas

Bearing

Witness by Stephanie Maltarich

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that’s what he said

Sisu Does Satire

by Andrew Pridgen

ing on snow rn tu f o y jo le the simp and family, s d n ie Whether it’s fr h it w e memories I don’t want to , n downhill, or th w to in ta n u in a mo something s p e e k or the lifestyle , k in th n’t. Skiing, I f snow, for the o lose this. I ca e v lo e th r fo live, and at makes us h w f inside of me a o e v lo e net, for th of snow love of this pla . the love it r e v o a f s to human. I want Page 40

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STAFF follow @sisumagazine #gritandguts

SUBSCRIBE

EDITOR IN CHIEF Jennifer Gurecki CREATIVE DIRECTOR Lauren Bello Okerman COPY EDITOR Lacey England

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CONTACT For general inquiries, write to hello@sisumagazine.com

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STOCKISTS

CONTRIBUTORS Vanessa Barajas Faith Briggs Melanie Briggs Jenny Bruso Erika Fitzgerald Kiona Frances Lee Stephanie Maltarich Charlotte Massey Samantha Romanowski Lynne Schmidt Jenn Sheridan Andrew Pridgen Jamon Wolfe Erica Zazo

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letters to the editor Send your letters to editor@sisumagazine.com and snail mail or gifts to 3983 S. McCarran Blvd. #481

photography & Art Lou Bank Lauren McMillin Wyeth Moss

Reno, Nevada 89502

©2019 Sisu Magazine, All rights reserved. Printed on 100% recycled paper.

No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the editor, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law.

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“ There are no norms.

All people are exceptions to a rule that doesn’t exist .”

Fernando António Nogueira Pessoa Portuguese poet, writer, literary critic, translator, publisher and philosopher.

1888-1935

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FROM THE EDITOR

Now that we have one year under our belt, things are beginning to tighten up at Sisu Magazine. Issue 5: Black & White is the first issue where we decided upon a theme months before we went to print, rather than the day before. Previously, we had allowed for it to emerge organically, and surprisingly, this approach worked. There’s still an element of serendipity, where the connections between pieces exist without our influence, but this time we were more intentional.

One of the reasons for this shift is based on the world around us. Everywhere we look, we see opposite ends of the spectrum sparring, with little appreciation for what lies in the middle. We’ve become so dogmatic that even the most progressive people are conservative in their approaches when it comes to managing discourse within their own circles. Frances Lee, best known for their piece “Excommunicate Me From the Church of Social Justice,” explores this very subject inside this issue, writing about the need for imperfect apologies to bring activists and allies back together.

We also are seeing the very definition of what it means to be outdoorsy evolve. No longer can we force each other into identifying either as a city slicker or nature lover. The two are coalescing and the lines that once separated us are disappearing. Our feature on Mappy Hour dispels the myth that you can’t find outdoor experiences in cities, uncovering some of the most interesting places to recreate in urban areas. Faith Brigg’s piece on the Brotherhood of Skiing reminds us once again that we haven’t been paying attention— or perhaps we’ve been fooled by the media—to who actually plays outside.

One of the most significant departures from a binary perspective is gender fluidity. The notion that there are two genders—men and women—is quickly eroding to expose a more nuanced and honest representation of gender. There’s nothing unisex about this reordering of society; there is a broad spectrum of human beings who are choosing their own identity rather than being told how to show up in this world. From Lou Bank’s photo essay on their experience of embracing a new body after gender affirming surgery, to Hannah Aram’s decision to compete professionally as the first trans women in the Freeride World Tour, Issue 5: Black & White explores the depth of what lies in the middle.

It’s those shades, those halftones, that we rarely experience. But that is where the truth lies. The place where hope lives, is where we can be better, more inclusive, more aware, more active than what we are today. You see Issue 5 has nothing to do with being black or white. It’s all about the subtleties and the nuances that have been hidden in between.

Jennifer Gurecki Editor In Chief

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FROM THE creative director One of the first things you learn when you are learning to make your own marks is to make a black line.

The only reason you see this mark is because your line of graphite or ink or crayon is on light paper. At first, all of your lines are black lines; your marks are made with singular purpose. As time moves on, and you play with shapes, you also play with pressure. You notice that you can still see your mark if you press only slightly, and you realize that you can make an infinite amount of tones if you allow yourself to. Your mark-making becomes both more complex and more subtle. The more you begin to explore the range between the black mark and white paper, your art more accurately reflects your detailed intention, and thus yourself.

For artists, the name for this play of dark and light is called chiaroscuro. Chiaroscuro is an Italian word and technical term for the interplay of black and white to create volume and drama. It’s what we might call contrast in familiar terms, but the full definition is much more than that. To employ chiaroscuro is to use very little of pure black or white, but to actually master the range of tones in between––the gray area.

In the artwork of Wyeth Moss in this issue, you will notice the limited palette of their drawings. It’s what you might call black and white. When you examine more closely, the detail and power in their work is actually a product of the gray tones. Their drawings may not appear to have color, but they are not bitonal––they are made up of infinite grays, stipples, dots, lines, smudges. In fact, the black and white they use is to highlight and bring forth the infinite tones of gray that are actually their “colors.” Wyeth is a master of chiaroscuro. Even now as they transition to using color in their new and future work, they know and harness the power that resides in the range of tones between the extremes. The things these drawings make you feel—depth, beauty, complexity—are not the result of the black or the white, but a product of mixing the two with skill and intention and creating a landscape of the shades between.

For Issue 5 of Sisu Magazine, which we have themed Black & White, we are really intending to highlight everything in between. As in chiaroscuro, the concept of Black & White bookends the power of the infinite in-between zone, where nothing is all or nothing, and everything is somewhere on a continuum. This issue explores how humans, situations, perceptions, and places are born, exist, and thrive between finites and absolutes.

As art presents a corollary to life, this is our human condition. As you read this issue of Sisu Magazine, I invite you to acknowledge the power of the gray, reject the canon of the binary, and embrace the delicate and exalted freedom of subtle shades of existence.

Lauren Bello Okerman Creative Director

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Frances Lee | HelloFrancesLee.com

Doing the right thing all the time isn’t just hard, it’s impossible. I think some of us have forgotten this tenet of social reality. Over the past few years, activists across justice movements, including myself, are learning that when the stakes are high, when resources are so scrappy, and binary frameworks pervade ideologies around right and wrong, people with shared political values will experience a great deal of conflict and ruptured relationships. Rather than encouraging people to pause, reflect, and respond when harm has occurred, some damaging social norms have dictated that ideas matter more than someone’s well-being and humility is weakness.

we live without them? Some of the apologies I’ve received are empty and unsatisfying, and that’s even if I have the courage to ask for them. Similarly, I’ve given my fair share of imperfect apologies and still don’t know how to apologize well. While I will be trekking along for a while learning how to say sorry and restoring relations, I will not be requiring perfect apologies from others along the way.

A Recipe For Apologies What constitutes an apology? From what I’ve learned, here are its parts, some optional, some not.

I learned this as I was crafting my essay “Excommunicate Me From the Church of Social Justice.” I wrote about watching my friends and fellow organizers tear each other down over needing to be perceived as politically pure. It was a moment of peak in-group punishment, when the wrong word or stance left some people friendless, socially isolated, or bereft of belonging. There was a rapidly shifting new social order, with different types of people up top, but the same structure of hierarchy strong as ever.

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Admission of the mistake that occurred or the harm that you caused.

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Timing matters too––sooner rather than later is always better. One of my friends shared with me that in their community, everyone addresses conflict within 48 hours.

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A show of genuine remorse.

Now, more than two years later after writing and reflecting on my germinal piece about the culture of the modern US social justice movement, I want to focus on one of the many processes that continue to lead us away from divisive, dogmatic activism: apologies. How do we apologize? What do apologies do? When is an apology good enough? If we’ve been wronged, how do we ask for an apology? How do

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A commitment to make things right, or if that’s not possible, to act differently next time when faced with a similar situation.

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Avoid saying sorry that someone was hurt by your actions, which is essentially blaming the other person’s oversensitivity for inconveniencing you.

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Hans-Martin Kudlinski @hmkphotog

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It might be meaningful to pause for a moment and listen to the other person’s response to your declarations, particularly if your apology is being transmitted in person.

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Apologies can be complete without forgiveness, though being forgiven closes the loop and can restore relational balance.

And then, you move on with your life, which means you stop shame spiraling and beating yourself up over what you did.

Or maybe it means you stop minimizing the harm your actions caused and sit with the reality of your responsibility to take care of those around you as best as you can. If you are alive long enough, you will come across the need to apologize to someone for something, eventually.

Whether you do it or not, and how you do it, is a different thing entirely.

and had long, flowing hair. I learned to make my body small and invisible through slouching and silence because I didn’t want to be seen. As an adult, I now veer towards a soft masculinity involving oversized workwear, fade haircuts, and a playful effeminacy.

Yet the passage from one to the other was neither straightforward nor seamless.

When I started toying with my gender presentation, it was the first time I had exercised so much autonomy over my social body. Thus, I leaned away from femininity into more pleasurable ways of dressing and bodily comportment.

Being mistaken for a man by strangers brought a special thrill; even though I wasn’t a man, I was no longer being treated as a woman.

We fear that if we lessen any sides to our anger, if we let our muscles for rage relax in

the slightest, we will reduce the engine for resistance work.

But my personal experimentation soon turned into a level of selfcenteredness that became obnoxious for everyone else around me. I still don’t comprehend the degree to which I was monopolizing conversations, making them about my budding masculinity and broadcasting entitlement to femme attention and desire. Coming into one’s queerness is often a hard-earned task worthy of much celebration, but it should never be an excuse to hit pause on being decent. A close friend, who had had enough of a onesided relationship with me, decided to abruptly end things between us. It shocked me and I smarted with hurt and self-righteousness.

This creates a parched, craggy

soil unsuitable for germinating apologies.

It’s easier to direct anger at others and the sorriness of the world, at the unfairness that we have to be here, around all of this. It might like there is a massive well at our disposal, filled with loathing and nasty thoughts to be directed at other people. As if drawing from its core of energy will protect us from harm. It’s as if we’ve conflated anger, activism, justice, and morality, believing they all need each other to keep churning.

We fear that if we lessen any sides to our anger, if we let our muscles for rage relax in the slightest, we will reduce the engine for resistance work. This creates a parched, craggy soil unsuitable for germinating apologies. How do we change the makeup of the soil to make it more fertile and able to host tendrils of other possibilities?

When It’s You Growing up, I was subject to compulsory heteronormative and Asian femininity; I was put in frilly dresses, begrudgingly wore drugstore makeup,

Months later, we attempted a reconciliation meeting, but I was still focused on the painful way they broke things off. Thus, I was not able to access an alternate, more comprehensive reading of reality that included other people’s experiences of my behavior over the past year. The apology I gave in person was meager. I wish I could present a real apology sculpted by gift of hindsight, one that included an understanding of a collective perspective, but the moment has forever passed. The best thing I can do is use remorse as a teacher and forge new patterns of 7

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self-actualization that don’t emotionally bulldoze those around me.

Incompleteness Haunts An unhealthy version of broken connections in our society is displayed in the practice of ghosting—when you go on a romantic date or hook up with someone once or several times, and while it’s apparent the other person felt an intimacy with you, you never call, text or message them back. Ghosting someone not only creates an awkward situation where an apology is surely warranted—because you rudely ceased all communications without explanation—but also makes the transmission of an apology highly improbable because you rudely ceased all communications without explanation.

Entire generations moving through the world accumulating countless throwaway encounters, each aching for resolution, creates widespread psychological malaise. To ghost people and be ghosted, to turn away from the human urge to reconcile, is to exist in an unsettling state of incompleteness. It is a failure to take responsibility for the well-being of your peers. While nothing may be in crisis, deep down, you know that things are not as they should be at all.

When It’s Them I have been returning to the final paragraphs of Kai Cheng Thom’s essay, “The Last Essay I’ll Ever Write About #CanLit And Sexual Abuse.” Thom writes about being verbally mistreated by a famous queer writer, who, when privately confronted, apologized for making her uncomfortable while claiming harmless intentions.

When reflecting on how she deserved so much more than a half-apology, Thom decided to cease pursuing the matter: ”I didn’t want a second apology… I wanted the apology they had to give.”

What does it mean to accept imperfect apologies?

Not to merely take what works and leave the rest, but to embrace the entirety of what the person who harmed you is offering, including the glaring absences? If nobody is perfect or knows how to apologize perfectly, then holding onto the expectation that you deserve the most up-to-date, social justice-informed accounting of all the ways the other person wronged you can only be a source of constant disappointment. We have memorized the checklists of the many ways that people experiencing privilege can fuck up and dodge accountability, and yes, we have to keep bringing them up with one another as folks get more savvy. But that doesn’t mean we have to let those imperfect apologies hold us back from accessing the inner peace needed to move on from the situation.

Pawnee attorney, author and public speaker Walter Echo-Hawk, speaks to apologies on a national scale: "Whatever tradition you come from, your finest and highest teachings tell you that when you’ve injured somebody you must go to that person and apologize, prostrate yourself and ask for forgiveness. It’s a very hard step to do because we often demonize the people that we have harmed, wished them ill.”

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It Takes Noticing

To ghost people and be ghosted,

Apologizing in a “right-sized” manner in order to make amends is a lifelong skill that eludes the realm of human mastery. My heart weighs heavily at how unable I’ve been to model this in community, how steeped I am in perpetual beginnerhood. But there’s hope, there always is. In a recent bitch interview with Corinne Manning, adrienne maree brown pointed out that opportunities to respond more humanely arise after every act of harm.

“It helps so much to notice small ways you can shift. When a friend hurts your feelings, can you get curious?” she shared.

to turn away from the human urge to reconcile, is to exist in an unsettling state of incompleteness.

It is a failure to take responsibility for the well-being of your peers.

When I hurt someone else’s feelings, can I also get curious and be moved by that curiosity to assess previously hidden options? Can I slow down and feel what’s going on in my heart and body, even if it can’t be put to words? Can I take in what they are communicating to me in response to being hurt?

Can I relate to their emotional state or the position I’ve put them in? Can I remember my values and let them guide me in my next word or action? These pauses and small acts of bravery are available to all of us.

On Reconciliation and Restoration I’m not here to lie about how everything that is broken can be fixed, as living in that myth is another form of suffering. In the Buddhist tradition of radical acceptance, Block Build Be organizer LiZhen Wang said, “We acknowledge that harm can be part of relationship and our sincere wish is to be honest in the relationship because we know that truth brings us closer to liberation.” We know that not all relationships last for a lifetime. When conflict and harm arise between people or groups, sometimes the kindest thing to do is stop being in connection to stop the wounding.

Reconciliation and restoring the relationship simply may not be in the cards. Going through the process of making an apology does the work of acknowledging the harm that occurred on all sides, rather than acting as if it never happened or concocting elaborate stories about each other’s dreadfulness. If there is no longer connection, at least let there be an honest accounting of how things ended to store in collective memory. Then

the balm, the necessary process of healing, is able to occur after this clearing away.

Embracing Imperfection Where does this leave us? We can practice apologizing to each other better and accept our fumblings in responding after we’ve harmed someone. A shitty or late apology is better than none. You could always try and go back to revise it later, if the other person is open to receiving an improved version—I’ve tried this before and sometimes the effort comes across. Offering up good apologies is still really hard because we have tender egos and we can’t always access multiple truths in a moment of high-running emotions. That has got to be OK. On the flip side, receiving imperfect apologies helps us cultivate grace and humility. I should be slow to judge others for their faults, lest it be me in that same bind next time (which it will likely be).

While receiving a subpar apology can be quite discouraging, it still is giving you something—a feeling of slight ease or relief, perhaps a slice of being seen, a thing you are able to integrate and carry with you as a seed of possibility. What we are owed and what we need to keep going are not always the same things.

Learning how to be with each other in community, while banding together to rewrite the world towards wholeness and freedom, is vital.

Together, we inhabit a multitude of contradictions, failures, and potentials. Let’s endeavor to apologize better to each other in the only way that we can— with imperfection and full of glorious messiness.

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THE PITCH

eastern sierra conservation corps An interview with:

Agnes vianzon of Eastern Sierra Conservation Corps | @easternsierracc

Photography by:

Lauren Mcmillin |

@loloandthelens

“The intention behind ESCC lies in our three main objectives: access, engagement, and extension.”

Agnes Vianzon is out to build a stronger and more inclusive community in the backcountry and beyond. We sat down with her to find out the vision behind the organization she founded, the Eastern Sierra Conservation Corps.

Why did you start the Eastern Sierra Conservation Corps? I fell in love with the teaching and mentoring part of my work with young adults both with the National Park Service and with the California Conservation Corps Backcountry Trails Program. In that however was a desire to do things differently, mostly having to do with inclusivity.

A voice grew louder and louder as I spent months living and working within a national park. Honestly, I just wanted to give it a go. If I was able to get a handful of people in an immersive wilderness experience, it was worth it. I wanted to see things done differently. I wanted to give back and share with others the opportunities to live in a tent 25 miles away from a road where you have no cell service or hot water, where you have to work it out with the crewmate staring you down from across the fire. You learn lessons that can only be taught by carrying a heavy pack and moving heavy rocks all day long. And that the space would be more welcoming to you no matter who you are or where you came from. That peple would see themselves represented by those guiding the way.

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How is the ESCC different from other conservation corps? Conservation corps are found all over California and across the nation. The very first one ever, the Civilian Conservation Corps, didn’t even allow women to serve. Our motto at the ESCC is “Discover the range of your potential.”

The intention behind ESCC lies in our three main objectives: access, engagement, and extension. We increase access to the outdoors by eliminating the financial and social barriers to this access while focusing our reach to priority populations. We engage with our participants on a deeper level by passing on the skills and knowledge in a way that they can also pass along that knowledge. And the extension piece means that the impact goes beyond our eight day, 40 mile trips or eight week seasons. Members and participants are asked to continue helping us to achieve our mission. We hope to instill lifelong practices of leadership in stewards and protecting outdoor spaces.

What did it take to get your non-profit off the ground? Not only are we off the ground, but we are also nearly doubling our programming each summer. I am privileged with a college degree, a winter bartending gig that allowed for me to purchase my first home, a supportive partner, and resources to take the time it needed to not work but to plan and prepare, to file the paperwork, and to meet with prospective

agencies to partner with. I bought the how to start a nonprofit in CA book and read it cover to cover. We are off the ground but still going through some big growing pains.

What has surprised you the most with ESCC? To date, we have helped to facilitate an experience for over 85 new outdoor leaders. And five of them worked for the National Park Service or US Forest Service this summer! In our short time, we are changing the narrative and changing the faces we see represented in employment and visitation of public lands.

What’s so difficult about this work and how do you push past it? I haven’t pushed past it. It is a constant struggle to keep a balance. It has affected my personal life. I am defined by ESCC and still the only full time employee but without a guaranteed paycheck each week. I took the leap of faith into imaginative risk and have support and resources but we are still very delicate in our sustainability. But I do recognize where we are and where we want to go. It is about the little things I build in—a walk or hike or riding my snowboard every day that I can. I meditate and maybe it is only for three minutes. I work with my door open and the sun shining in. And there is whiskey and lots of it.

Tell us about Women in the Wilderness and why it’s so important to you. As I was preparing for a panel a few years ago, I wrote out a list of every supervisor I had ever had. Fifteen were white-cis-hetero males; two were women. I could talk about stats and the number of women, or even lower, the number of Women of Color currently working on ancestral territories or “public lands.”

Some alumni have joined our corps or other corps. Some are creating sponsorship decks for ESCC. Many have donated back to us. We have an annual reunion for continued connection and networking. It is important because I want to give the opportunities that were shown to me. We all need to work harder to open up these spaces because they should be available to everyone and not just a select few.

How can the Sisu community support you? Show some love! That can be a follow, a like, a comment, a share, or a conversation with a friend who might be able to donate. Spread the good word about our work and the ways that we are trying to make that impact in a more inclusive way with a true pathway to success in the outdoor world or otherwise.

Note from the editors: The best way to show some love is with your hard earned dollars. If you believe in what Agnes is building through the Eastern Sierra Conservation Corps, donate today. It’s only with financial resources that this work will continue.

This interview has been edited and condensed for clarity.

Sisu and the Coalition Snow community know the power of an affinity space, the power in getting together a group of folks in a space who didn’t have us in mind the way they currently are. What Women in the Wilderness does tangibly is teach hiking and backpacking skills along with some volunteer trail work. But to get folks to the table we provide transportation, gear, food, and all the training. Our trips begin with land acknowledgments plus history and support for Indigenous Peoples still doing the work.

We make agreements and set boundaries. We all hike together as a group. We are there to learn from our participants as much as they are there to learn from us. During our stay in an ESCC trail crew camp, our campfire side discussions revolve around barriers to access and the lack of diversity and inclusion in these spaces or whatever spaces we experience.

We put our hands on tools or rocks and work the land. We sing and dance and laugh so hard.

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ASK JENNY Questions and answers about life, the outdoors, and whatever from the creator of “Unlikely Hikers,” an online community for the underrepresented outdoorsperson JENNY BRUSO | @jennybruso

Dear Jenny Bruso, Do you love your body? How does one go about unlearning self-hatred? How do you see yourself as attractive and beautiful and valuable when you’ve constantly been told you’re not?

-Questioning My Worth

Dear Questioning, Are the people who express your lack of value close relations? Or, do you mean this in regard to everyday messaging from dominant culture and the occasional asshole? In what ways does it hold you back from making your life? And how can I destroy every single person who has made you feel this way? Your questions beget more questions that I’m painfully unable to ask due to anonymity. I guess it all stems from the same bullshit, so I’ll try my best.

Before I crack the self-love code for you, I want to be crystal clear about some things. Spend some time taking this in. Write these words on a piece of paper and stick it somewhere you look at every day: •

Our individual worth is inherent.

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It is not something dictated by appearance or something to be earned.

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None of us chose to enter this world and we are worthy of respect and fairness by sheer existence.

Obviously, this is not how dominant culture operates, but it’s the truth. The more you can self-actualize this, the better you will become at navigating the rest.

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Even on bad days, your worthiness exists despite how you feel or how anyone treats you.

I’m sorry to say it, but I haven’t cracked the self-love code. If I had, I’d have canned this whole outdoor writing thing in lieu of swimming in an Olympic-size pool of the riches I’d make off of this lifehack.

Let’s call a spade a spade. There are some specific qualities equating to “attractiveness:” whiteness and European facial features, thinness, body shape, cissexuality (identifying with the gender you were assigned at birth), able-bodiedness, appearance of affluence, and youth.

It is painful, abusive, and wrong that these things inform our social capital. The harm we experience because of this is REAL. To chalk up our feelings to insecurity invalidates the harm we endure. We learn to disengage from parts of life for safety. We are judged on our looks in nearly every arena of life: while shopping, in the streets, in the workplace as well as applying for jobs, dating, friendships, and far beyond.

Simply, life is easier for people who are perceived as physically attractive. Worse, attractiveness is constantly being tweaked by big business (read: capitalism), so we’ll never feel good enough and therefore spend more money trying to keep up. It keeps us culturally in submission, unable to embody our personal power, keeping the bozos in charge.

There is definitely something to be said about moving through the world insisting on our worth, but it doesn’t always change the way we’ll be treated. To get to a place of self-love in the face of impossible standards is nothing short of a miracle, which is why I kind of want to steer away from the idea of self-love–– bear with me!

Body-positive culture, which is largely built on the

voices and visibility of white cishetero women smaller than a size 20, has created this idea of self-love being the answer to low self-worth and rarely acknowledges life’s daily cruelties and oppression. Sometimes, loving yourself is too tall of an order. We need to shift our focus to self-liberation. After acknowledging and embracing our inherent worth, we need to start asking ourselves what this liberation looks like. Is it doing the thing you’ve held yourself back from because you wanted to lose weight first? Is it flirting with someone you think is cute, without needing a specific response? Is it asking for the raise you deserve? Is it telling your mom or coworkers to knock off their diet talk because it’s a massive buzzkill? Just some ideas.

Self-love can’t really enter the picture until we do the work of liberating ourselves without relying on permission and validation.

and then get back at it!

I’ve already given you a lot to work on, but I’ve got a couple more things: If you are the only person of a specific identity or lived experience in your social realm, you absolutely must make friends with folks who have a working understanding of where you’re coming from. There is so much personal liberation in having community! Acknowledge your passing privileges––we all have them. If your personal liberation relies on keeping anyone else down, it isn’t liberation. Share knowledge and advocate for others along with yourself.

Love, Jenny Bruso

The harm we experience because of this is REAL. To chalk up our feelings

Do you have questions for Jenny? Hit her up on Instagram at @jennybruso for a chance to have your questions answered.

to insecurity invalidates the harm we endure. We learn to disengage from parts of life for safety.

I’m wondering if you asked me this because you think I’ve reached some personal self-love pinnacle. In a very general way, I love myself, but often I don’t. No one is more critical of, or more cruel to me, than me.

Despite of that, a thread of love for myself is in everything I do because I understand my perception of myself is not a fixed thing. I understand I deserve respect, fair treatment and kindness, even when I don’t receive them. I also stay aware of my occasional passing privileges: I’m white, able-bodied, feminine, have an hourglass body-shape and pass as cisgender. Often people see the size of my body and have already decided my lack of worth before registering anything else about me. We’ve been brainwashed into thinking being fat is the worst possible thing one can be. I am regularly mistreated by strangers and experience daily harm via advertisements. Still, I’ve learned to keep it moving. Take time to tend to your wounds

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an indoor girl on the outdoors MELANIE BRIGGS

Soul Sludge Online dating will pulverize your soul.

It will suck your soul straight out of your eyes, reduce it to a fine powder, bring it to simmer over a low heat, and then replace it with nuclear waste. The remnants of your soul will be canned and sold as a rare spice that makes a particularly nice curry, though it’s known to cause indigestion. It will be marketed as vegan, but the FDA will find that classification questionable.

It is the price you pay to receive countless offers of erotic massage from strangers you have never met. To exchange many gigabytes of text messages that result in nary even one in-person meeting, but yield infinite replies of LOL, which can be very validating if you want to go into comedy, because apparently 99 percent of your auto-corrected, unpunctuated quips cause people to audibly laugh (imagine what you could do with a pre-written script). To subject yourself to at least 1,000 tiny cuts a day, no deeper than a paper cut, that will most definitely lead to your death.

But from what I hear, some people meet their spouses online, so there’s that.

This is not a new version of the lovers’ blues. We’ve all heard this one before, at least those of us who have dated in the post-Internet age. In the years—nay, millenia—prior, you had to meet people in person. As someone who lived through both, I think there may have been fewer tiny cuts. That could also be a myth I’m

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perpetuating as of this minute, but it seems like the cuts were fewer—broader and deeper, and closer to the jugular, but fewer.

But I’ll tell you what’s truth, and that’s that pre-Internet, meeting people definitely wasn’t as enjoyable. Because as far as I can remember, not nearly as many people were LOLing. Like apparently no one had anything funny to say until 2004, and that’s when suddenly no one could contain their laughter.

But how can one not LOL when a man writes that he is “Weirdly attracted to intelligent women who are into self-development but aren’t too sassy for their own good?”? Tell me, how does one one not LOL? (BTW, this is a real-life example provided by a man on an app called Hinge. He is located in the Washington, D.C. Metro area, so mid-Atlantic straight women, keep an eye out.)

This is what I learned from online dating.

Consider these the commandments of online dating, starting now: 1. Thou will give a hard left-swipe to anyone who opens by telling you that they “Live life to the fullest” or “Work hard and play hard.” Ditto for anyone who lets you know they are “Just as comfortable in jeans as they are in black tie formalwear.” Because you can choke on cliches if you’re not careful, and you can drown in the empty space where self awareness should be.

2. Thou will also give a hard left-swipe to Machu Picchu Selfies. Unless there is a somewhat original spin on it, like it’s a picture of everyone else taking The Machu Picchu Selfie 3. Thou will remove all photo filters that may have attached themselves to your eyeballs when you weren’t looking.

Don’t apply character traits or motivations to a 2D photo. Let the person develop into 4D on their own, and then believe what you see. People will show you who they are, and they are never lying.

7. Thou shall be judicious with the benefit of the doubt. It is not a given. That kind of trust is earned. Everyone gets a few freebies, but only a few. Refer back to number three—when a person shows you who they are, believe them.

8. Thou shall swipe left on anyone who says they want someone who is “into fitness.” Because that is always a just thinly veiled fatphobia, and we don’t tolerate that.

9. Shirtless photos also get a hard left swipe. Because put a shirt on.

Because you can choke on cliches if you’re not careful, and you can drown in the empty space where self awareness should be.

4. Thou will remind thy fairy godmother to turn you into a pumpkin. Limit the amount of time you spend staring at an online dating app. Give yourself 30 minutes and call it a day. When you start swiping without a time limit, you create the illusion of infinite supply. That’s when profiles start to lose even more of their humanity and people become commodities.

5. Thou will not take anything personally.

Rejection is never about you; it’s always about whatever is happening in their head.

6. Thou will get in good cardio shape and always wear protective gear. This is a numbers game; you’re going to have to do this a lot if you’re going to find someone you like. You wouldn’t free solo El Cap without the right gear and the right mindset. So suit up and get psyched.

10. Thou will take an extended break at least once every fiscal quarter, for the sake of thine sanity.

And keep tabs on your soul. It can only withstand so much, and that doesn’t mean you’re weak, whatever that means. It means you’re engaging in actual self-care.

Because online dating will pulverize your soul.

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An interview with Sarah Knapp of Mappy Hour | @mappy_hour

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a r a h Knapp, while sitting with her friend Alex at the Stumptown Coffee Roasters on 8th Street in New York City, stumbled upon a solution to a problem many didn’t even know existed: the lack of outdoor community in urban areas. She had a hunch that if she could get people together over drinks, she likely could also get them to hover over maps and plan outdoor adventures. (Because that’s what they do in Denver). Mappy Hour—and amalgamation of Maps and Happy Hour—was bor n in 2014 at a time when the conversions about who and what qualified as “outdoorsy” were just beginning to evolve. Today Mappy Hour is comprised of more than 4,000 members who belong to 15 chapters. She’s built a national community of urban dwelling outdoor enthusiasts who gather monthly around maps, guidebooks, beer, and adventure stories, and she wants you to join in the fun. We sat down with Sarah to find out more about Mappy Hour, and we asked her to round up some of co-conspirators from urban areas around the US to debunk some of the myths and open up our minds to some of the possibilities of recreating in urban areas.

What has been your experience in the outdoors as an urban dweller?

Part of why I wanted to start Mappy Hour in the first place as because of the personal exploration I had in New York City. I went to school there, and when I was in college, I didn’t do much in the outdoors. I felt really separate from it, as if a part of me was missing. After college I felt like I had to move to the mountains to be an outdoor person and have an outdoor experience.

But I realized that I missed New York City, 16

so I moved back. This led me to a personal exploration of the city from riding my bike a ton, to trying check out the urban parks, to going to the beach, to paddling in all of the different water ways that New York City offers. That’s what really excited me the most about the work that I do because there are of really epic adventures to have in national parks and wild places, but if you’re able to go on a subway or ride your bike from midtown Manhattan that i s really special and offers a lot to people who can’t live in wild areas or access them all of the time. My personal experience has been to try to find those places and my professional experience has ben to try to share it.

What are some of the misnomers about recreation and the outdoors in urban spaces? Part of the conversation is broadening the definition of outdoor reaction to be something that you can do without gear and in an after noon, and that ultimately it’s about recreating in an outdoor space. It is much more all encompassing than perhaps a more traditional view of outdoor recreation. This definition has changed a lot since I started Mappy Hour, both in the outdoor industry and how people see themselves as outdoor enthusiasts.

It has to do with our self identity, about what it means is to be an active person who spends time in nature and the words used around being active in nature.

Why is it important to you to craft a new narrative about what it means to both have a love of the outdoors and live in an urban area?

Because the future of how people live depends on it. The current trends show that more and more people are moving into urban areas and I believe that outdoor recreation and nature is essential for the majority of humans. We need to support, promote, and connect people to the outdoors who are also urban dwellers we can benefit the most people as possible. And with more people living in cities, the future of the outdoor industry will be defined by them as well.

What do you want people to know about Mappy Hour? One thing that we really focus on at Mappy Hour is that through living in an urban environment and being multi-dimensional people with different interests, we need to help create the community that connects them to the outdoors so that it becomes part of their larger routine or lifestyle. One of the goals is to provide a space to actually share their passions for the outdoors when that might not be the dominant culture of whatever other spaces they exist in. We also are able to hig hlight and celebrate the local.

Each chapter is dedicated to a specific city and each city is so different. The featured speakers are specific to the city and they highlight initiatives in each city. There’s an opportunity for people who are doing cool work to share it, and my dream is to elevate that to a more national level.

What does the future hold for Mappy Hour? The future of Mappy Hour is two parts. First, how do we share the stories of leaders who are doing the great work in these cities with a national audience so that we can build and lear n from one another. The other major thing we’re trying to think through is how do people actually connect with each other and build trust to go outside and share these adventures? Beyond a meeting are there other tools and ways that we can facilitate connections between people? What does it look like to meet a stranger and then become hiking buddies, and how do we facilitate that process? I may have started Mappy Hour in New York, but I want to create a structure for other people to build their own communities and that is one of the most exciting things about Mappy

Hour: the people in the other cities are doing the work.

Name & Location: Erica Zazo, Mappy Hour Chicago, Illinois Instagram: @onecurioustrvlr How long have you been a local? 4 years What’s one outdoor gem in your city? The Openlands Lakeshore Preserve. It features the best of all things Chicago: art, history, Lake Michigan shoreline, and a mix of trails.

What’s your go -to restaurant, cafe, or bar to refuel post excursion? Old Irving Brewery for a Beezer (the greatest NEIPA on the planet) and an OIB burger.

What’s the future of outdoor recreation in your city? The outdoor community in Chicago is bubbling and I can feel it’s starting to almost boil over.

You can see that in local climbing gyms, in hiking groups on Facebook such as Women Who Hike Illinois, and the tur nout for conservation organization meetu-ps and trail cleanups. The eager ness to get outside and do “outdoorsy” things like paddling the Chicago River or hiking at a local Forest Preserve is top of mind for many people. Our Chicago outdoor community is certainly on the up and up.

What would surprise people about recreating in urban areas? Nature is closer than you think. There are a number of public transit lines that can take you to wild spaces, you can find local parks with gravel walking trails in city neighborhoods, and you can get to a local trail in most cities in than 30-minutes by car.

What’s your outdoor playlist? I listen to a lot of acoustic, instrumental and Indy artists, like alt-J, Local Natives, Young the Giant, and Ben Howard.

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ities. It’s an exciting time to be in thi s city!

Name & Location: Lauren Fryan, Mappy Hour Detroit, Michigan Instagram: @laurfryan How long have you been a local? A little over two and a half years What’s one outdoor gem in your city? Belle Isle—it’s an island that’s just a bridge ride from Downtown Detroit.

It’s surrounded by water and has about seven miles of coastline. So many people head there to get outside for the day! It’s one of my favorite places for sure.

What’s your go-to restaurant, cafe, or bar to refuel post excursion? @easter nmarketbrewing with @supinopizzeria How would you “do the outdoors” with only $20 in your pocket? I love to run. Even if it means walking half the time, ha! Just getting outside to breathe fresh air is the best thing. Coffee and a pastry from our neighborhood bakery @sisterpiedetroit would be where is spend the $20 post run ;) Local outdoor shop where you pick up supplies, equipment, clothing, etc.? Both Moosejaw and Carhartt are SE Michigan companies that have a wesome outdoor gear. Definitely my go-to local shops.

What does “getting outside” mean to you? Any time I can spend getting some fresh air and clear my head. Some of my favorite things to do are run, hike, and rock climb. A lot of weekends, I’ll take a trip north to camp or backpack too. The outdoors bring me back to center and it’s when I feel my absolute best.

What’s the future of outdoor recreation in your city? More parks, more bike paths ,and increased kayaking/canoeing on the Detroit River. Detroit is massive and there’s so much opportunity to grow outdoor spaces and areas for outdoor activ-

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What would surprise people about recreating in urban areas? How easy it can be to forget you’re in the city just by taking a walk in a wooded area or getting in a kayak. A lot of people think of the extremes when “getting outside”and don’t think it’s worth it to take the time. I think people would be surprised how accessible a lot of outdoor activities can be in a city.

Sometimes it just takes an after noon of exploring a bike path or walking in a new park to find the outdoors in your city.

What’s in your pack—what do you not leave home without? The standard items—computer, wallet, and phone.

The one item I’m always sad if I f orget: chapstick. Rare occasion considering I have about 20 tubes hidden in several coats, pants, and of course... bags.

What’s your outdoor playlist? When I’m outside I usually prefer no music. The sounds are one of my favorite parts about being outside... even if it’s silence. After a long camping trip I like some Bon Iver to ease me back into the real world.

Name & Location: Sarah Davis, Mappy Hour Springfield, Missouri Instagram: @sarahendipity_d How long have you been a local? All my life!

What’s one outdoor gem in your city? Valley Water Mill Park, on the northeast side of town. It has about every type of outdoor environment (glades, woodland, wetlands, and a beautiful spring-fed lake.

There are trails and docks for fishing. It’s also recognized for its birding opportunities!

What’s your go -to restaurant, cafe, or bar to refuel post excursion? I love a post-hike beer. We have s everal

great local craft breweries in town, but my favorite is Tie & Timber Beer Co. How would you “do the outdoors” with only $20 in your pocket? Put gas in the car and drive two hours south to the Buffalo River for a day of hiking!

Local outdoor shop where you pick up supplies, equipment, clothing, etc.? Gearhead Outfitters.

What’s in your pack—what do you not leave home without? I love my North Face Thermoball which comes in handy with Missouri’s ever-changing weather.

Name & Location: Tasmin Andres, Mappy Hour Cleveland, Ohio Instagram: @SPAC3CATAZ How long have you been a local? Bor n and raised!

What’s one outdoor gem in your city? Dike 14, which is a former lakefront landfill that is now a nature preserve with an amazing view of the skyline.

What’s your go-to restaurant, cafe, or bar to refuel post excursion? Beer and a slice with honey at Edison’s Pub. What would surprise people about recreating in urban areas? I’ve been really getting into spotting predatory birds lately. It’s known that falcons nest in some of the taller buildings downtown, and there are pockets all around Cleveland where you can see hawks and even owls.

Look up!

What’s the future of outdoor recreation in your city? The Midwest doesn’t often receive credit for being a

destination for outdoor recreation, but there are so many gems. Between our freshwater lake, a national park in our backyard, and world-class climbing a half-day’s drive away, Cleveland has it all. A strong network of resources dedicated to increasing access and inclusive programming is a critical next step.

What’s your outdoor playlist? I recently went on a ladies trip to climb in Joshua Tree and we made a collaborative playlist on Spotify. Not only did it eliminate the dreaded delegation of DJ, it was also so fun to guess who put what songs on. I’ve been bopping to it ever since.

Name & Location: Alexandra Tilsley, Mappy Hour Washington, D.C. Instagram: @tilsley Location and how long have you been a local?

5 years What’s one outdoor gem/secret in your city? The single track in Rock Creek Park!

What’s your go -to restaurant, cafe, or bar to refuel post excursion? W icked Bloom.

How would you “do the outdoors” with only $20 in your pocket? In DC, there are so many ways to get outside cheap. Take a free boat tour on the Anacostia! Hike through Rock Creek! Run the Glover Archbold trail. Bike the Ana costia River Trail or mountain bike at Fort Dupont.

Kayak on the Potomac, stroll through the aquatic gardens, explore the arboretum... and that’s all without getting in a car.

What would surprise people about recreating in urban areas? There are so many trails—real, single-track, technical trails—within DC city limits. You might have to cross a few roads, but you can run a 50k in the District almost entirely on dirt.

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how to soak and shred the eastern sierra

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JENN SHERIDAN | @nosnowsnakes

Photography by Lauren Mcmillin |

@loloandthelens

If you’ve never road tripped California’s Eastern Sierra, the time is now. Tall jagged peaks sprout from a high alpine desert and the space between the summit and the valley floor is a playground of adventures just waiting to be explored. While I can’t even begin to scratch the surface of opportunities for climbing, hiking, skiing, and well, you get the idea, I can spill the tea on how to spend a long weekend soaking in hot springs, cat skiing, and eating some of the best food. So pack your skis or splitboard and let’s hit the road.

the road Highway 395 stretches from the US-Canadian border approximately 1,300 miles south to the Mojave Desert. For this trip, we’re focusing on a section that parallels the Sierra Nevada range between Reno, Nevada and Bridgeport, California.

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last call Reno is your first and last opportunity to stock up on food and all the last minute goodies you need for a weekend of fun. REI? Trader Joe’s? Reno’s got it, but once you start to head south bigname stores give way to funky shops and quick mart style grocers, which isn’t a bad thing until you’re looking for a specific type of fuel for your camp stove.

Speaking of last call, you’re definitely going to want to top off the gas tank one last time because just a few hours down the road gas prices can be as much as $1 per gallon more. Save the most pennies by fueling up at the Arco station in Gardnerville. From here, download your favorite podcasts and playlists (because you’re about to lose cell service) and hit the road.

treasure hunting Just south of Gardnerville the buildings are few and far between. This is where you really get into the podcast, road snacks, and cruise control for the next hour and a half as high alpine desert screams past the windshield. The next signs of civilization are a handful of small towns: Coleville, Walker, and Topaz. Don’t blink or you’ll miss them. If you’re looking to stretch your legs and your imagination, the Walker Flea Market is an eclectic mash-up of welded sculptures, antiques, jewelry, and art. The treasure hunt is well worth the stop.

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soak it up A quick 30 minutes down the road from Walker, you’ll see the town of Bridgeport, a small cluster of buildings in the middle of a few vast cattle fields. Don’t worry, getting to Bridgeport doesn’t mean the adventure is over, but it is time to get out of the car and soak those bones in steaming mineral water. From town there are a couple of different options for hot springing. The more adventurous choice is Buckeye Hot Springs. To get there, you’ll head east out of town on a washboard dirt road for a couple of miles. Just past Buckeye Campground, there is a pull out with ample parking. The trail will be steep and rough so wear sturdy shoes. The pools are right on the banks of Buckeye Creek. When it gets too hot, hop into the creek for a quick cool down.

The quick and easy place to soak is Travertine Hot Springs. It’s a quick five minute drive out of Bridgeport and while the road is a little rough, most low clearance cars should still be able to make it. There’s a total of six different pools at Travertine, each with stunning views of the Sierra Nevada.

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shred and unwind Don’t soak too long because the hot springs aren’t the final destination (it’s OK, you can hit them again on the way home.) The next stop is Virginia Lakes Road, just 20 minutes south of Bridgeport, where you’ll rendezvous with the guides of High Sierra Snowcat and Yurt. Virginia Lakes Road provides access to miles of backcountry riding including Dunderberg Peak, South Peak, and Mount Olsen. The road isn’t plowed in the winter and while it is accessible by skinning, booking a trip with High Sierra Snowcat and Yurt saves you the five-mile approach so your legs are fresh for bagging peaks.

The snowcat will take you to one of two yurts operated by High Sierra Snowcat and Yurt. Each yurt sleeps six people comfortably. The best part? All meals are prepared for you by High Sierra’s staff, meaning you’ll have time for a lap before dinner, even after spending the first half of the day exploring and soaking in the hot springs. After dinner, it’s time to hang the solar-powered string lights, slap the bag, and start the dance party, but be careful not to party too hard because you’ll want to be semi-fresh for a day of cat-assisted touring all over the Virginia Lakes basin.

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refuel for the drive home

After a long day of carving the peaks around Virginia Lakes with the guides of High Sierra Snowcat and Yurt, it’s time to head back to civilization, but there’s one last crucial stop before hitting the road. The Burger Barn in Bridgeport is the spot to go for greasy, filling, and inexpensive food to save you from being hangry. The menu is an odd mash-up of classic frosty and Tex-Mex. While a burger is one of my favorite apres meals, the Baja fish tacos are hard to pass up here. Whether you opt for a bun or a tortilla, the food here is sure to satisfy after spending a day exploring above treeline. From here it’s just a few more hours till Reno lights up the horizon.

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“It’s my anger that keeps me working for this change.” ~ Mirabai Bush

co-founder of the Center for Contemplative Mind in Society & Author 80 YEARS OLD

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whats in

our rack Outdoor Research Blackpowder II Jacket OutdoorResearch.com

Yakima sky box Yakima.com

coalition snow sos & Rebel skis CoalitionSnow.com

Outdoor Research Enigma baselayers OutdoorResearch.com 26

sunski treelines Sunski.com

Sunski

We’re not sure how Sunski pulls off recycled frames, replacement lenses, polarized lenses, and heaps of style for under $100, but we’ll take all of it. Actually, make it two pairs, please. We want one for every adventure from this up and coming indie brand out of the Bay Area whose clearly got their fingers on the pulse of the future of the outdoors.

Outdoor Research

Want to stay warm and cozy all winter long? (Who doesn’t, right?) The Blackpowder II Jacket was designed to keep those frigid temps at bay with the weather-warding qualities of Pertex® Shield and insulating superpowers of AdrenaLoft™. Pair the Blackpowder II with the Enigma base layer top and bottom, both made from Blended DriRelease® merino wool and E.C.O. (Environmentally Correct Origins) fabrics, and you’ve got a match made in heaven.

Gregory

Whether it’s a road trip or backcountry ski trip, Gregory has you covered with their all-new Targhee pack. Drawing on 40+ years of experience in pack design and engineering, this pack brings the best of Gregory’s knowledge and expertise to the mountains. The newest generation of this award-winning backcountry ski pack is lighter, stronger, and more user friendly. Yes, please, to all of that.

Yakima

GREGORy targhee PACk Gregory.com

Tired of deciding between fitting a friend or your skis on that long road trip or daily drive up to the mountain?

We’ve certainly been there. Rather than put Rachel on our lap, we opted to store our stuff in Yakima’s Sky Box. It fits all of your gear, making the drive so much more comfortable. Extra points for skis that aren’t covered in snow and road gunk when you arrive at your destination.

Coalition Snow

Award-winning, athlete approved, women-owned and operated. Check, check, and check. Not only do we put together this magazine four times a year, we are also the humans behind Coalition Snow. Our skis and snowboards have graced the slopes of mountains all over the world, from our backyard in the Sierra Nevada to the Olympic Games in PyeongChang. You can shop our line at REI, Backcountry, and evo, or visit us at our shop in Truckee, CA. 27

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changing the mindset of who skis faith briggs | @faithevebee

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PC: colin arisman

W

hen most people think about skiing and ski culture, they might think about something on the spectrum of family vacations to Vail or long-haired ski bros who use words like gnar and stoke. It’s a narrow image. It doesn’t include most of the skiers I know. It almost never includes any Black and Indigenous People of Color.

This shouldn’t come as a surprise as historically in this country, People of Color have been disconnected from the land and disenfranchised in ways that affected socioeconomic status, freedom of movement, safety, and access. Though the emancipation proclamation abolished slavery in 1864, it wasn’t until almost 200 years later in 1954 that Brown v. The Board of Education ruled that “separate but equal” was unacceptable in public schools. This ruling set the groundwork for the Civil Rights Act of 1964 and the precedent for desegregation in everything from parks to beaches to lunch counters.

Many cities shut down public parks and beaches rather than have to open them to Blacks. Wealthy whites moved their recreation to private clubs. The newly “desegregated” parks, including local ski hills, were not yet an option for most people of color for fear of safety.

This is the climate in which Art Clay and Ben Finley, the founders of The National Brotherhood of Skiers (NBS) started skiing. The NBS is an umbrella organization that has grown to over 50 chapters since its founding in 1973. NBS members, including its founders, have been skiing since before it was founded, and they’re still skiing now. They’ve influenced over 50,000 skiers across the country to change the mindset about who skis and to make skiing a part of the culture of their families and their communities.

Clay and Finley have been skiing for decades across many slopes and against many barriers as some of the few black faces. It’s unthinkable that in the wake of Civil Rights in the peak of the Black Power Movement, they were forward thinking enough to hit the slopes.

As we work to rewrite the narrative of the outdoors, we need to include the stories of people who have been breaking barriers even before they were being recognized as doing so. We need to highlight them as individuals and as trailblazers in an ongoing legacy. Clay and Finley aren’t instafamous, but they’ve changed culture and created a space for others. They are true influencers.

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I grew up in, never clipping into a pair of skis until age 28. I grew up on the East Coast and skiing had been one degree away my entire life, yet there were barriers to my participation. My own experience is similar to the experience of so many. Snow sports and outdoor activities that are a core part of the childhood experiences for some communities seem completely out of reach for others.

PC: colin arisman

That’s why I’m so proud to have produced a short film on their story: Brotherhood of Skiing.

“I

really want to get a shot of some of the kids on the magic carpets, those are always so cute.

Let’s head that way first.”

That’s Tyler Wilkinson-Ray, one of the co-directors of Brotherhood of Skiing. We are at Mt. Sunapee Ski Resort in New Hampshire filming a short documentary about The National Brotherhood of Skiers.

In this moment, we are at a local ski hill where it was tough to find parking at 8am on a Friday; folks out here love their skiing. It’s a different world from the one

When we decided to make this film, we wanted to share an incredible story. We also wanted to explore the reasons why skiing and snow sports can be so inaccessible, especially for historically marginalized communities. We wanted to create a bridge that contributed to real change by highlighting the people who have made skiing more welcoming, more inclusive, and more representative.

One year after premiering Brotherhood of Skiing at the Banff Mountain Film Festival in November 2018, Clay and Finley were nominated and inducted into the US Ski and Snowboard Hall of Fame. They are the first African American inductees.

S

chone Malliet, the Olympic Scholarship Fund Administrator of the NBS, has the best answer I’ve heard to the most asked question I receive about diversity and inclusion in the outdoors: What are the barriers? Schone outlined the multiple barriers to entry to winter activities as financial, geographic, social, cultural and historic.

While we hear a lot about finances being a probPC: tyler wilkinson-ray

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PC: colin arisman

lem, what we don’t hear about and certainly don’t hear solutions to, are the other contributing factors.

In making the film, we realized that the NBS was overcoming each barrier in communities across the country.

Financial limitations are the most tangible and thus the most acknowledged answer when it comes to why participation in some outdoor activities is inaccessible.

Paying for skis, lift tickets, gas, and transportation can make skiing inaccessible. It’s not just the money itself. As an outsider looking in, skiing looks expensive with its special gear and far off locations. Even if you could scheme ways to do it on the cheap, how would you even know where to begin?

people had to form clubs to become members. The club model still exists. It forms community and builds in opportunities for mentorship, sharing resources and sharing the fun.

During production, co-director, Colin Arisman, and I attended the annual NBS summit at Squaw Valley. We experienced pure joy. When most people describe the summit they simply say, “It’s a party!” And it is. It’s the best party.

Everyone wears bright colors and has major ski style. They’ve worked over the years to remove the cultural barriers and the stigma that says “Black people don’t ski.” They’ve created their own ski culture. From the electric slide in the middle of a Squaw Valley plaza to nightly themed happy hours and early morning first tracks, they are there to ski and have a good time. It isn’t about what lines to ski, it’s not about pursuit, no one looks down on “groomers,” no one is forcing newbies onto blues and blacks (harder graded slopes). We met mogul skiers, hung out with Errol Kerr (former Olympian representing Jamaica), and, regardless of skill level, everyone was just stoked about skiing.

"I think the film says what I want to say about being outside: Do it your way. Wear what you want, speak how you speak, go with whom you please, bring your full self.”

The NBS tackles the financial limitations by making it affordable. They tackle the geographic limitations by bringing people to the mountain. They tackle the social limitations by doing it in big groups and focusing on a community approach to skiing.

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you don’t know anyone that skis, what are the chances that you’ll want to try it or even think it’s for you? Growing up I had no idea that mountains had names and that people went up them. I didn’t grow up hearing about people skiing. I didn’t know anyone that skied. Now, in Portland, Oregon, I look up at the sky and hear people say, “Mt. Hood is out today,” meaning the mountain is visible. I’m surrounded by skiers and people headed “to the mountain” on the weekends. Now, I’m surrounded by a culture of skiing. Now, I’ve started skiing myself. By having annual gatherings and functioning as an umbrella organization, the NBS creates a social scene.

When Clay and Finley first started the organization,

One of the things I’m most proud of about Brotherhood of Skiing is that the film is fun and representative. That’s why it sticks out at film festivals that often celebrate a “sufferfest” mentality on the mountain.

I think the film says what I want to say about being outside: Do it your way. Wear what you want, speak how you speak, go with whom you please, bring your full self. The mountain is ready for you. The ski industry and those in power influencing mainstream ski culture are the ones playing catch up.

And while they do, Clay and Finley are going to be out there skiing.

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Connections

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How one photographer explores the relationship between the landscape and trans bodies Photography and Words by:

LOU BANK | @loubank

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aking my shirt off in public for the first time was terrifying, much more than expected. I tried so hard to look normal. I’d spent so much time practicing at home, trying on my swimsuit and modeling in the mirror with a towel around my waist, but it was still strange not to have to cover my chest. My hands instinctively moved to hide breasts that no longer existed. Alone, this chosen body looks like me. It’s a dream come true. Yet it still takes time to get used to how it feels to be seen.

I underwent gender affirming top surgery on September 20, 2018. For weeks I was stuck at home and could barely move my arms. I usually climbed at least three times a week and wanted desperately to move freely. I needed something to look forward to after all this stillness, so I decided to plan a trip across the country to visit friends and celebrate trans bodies outdoors.

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R

ae and I met in college and they have been one of my closest friends for the past seven years. They were my first non-binary friend and they have helped me through many life changes, including my transition.

Soaking in the hot springs with Rae loosened muscles wound tight from years of binding and bad posture. Water embraces all bodies equally holding us steadily afloat. Its warmth massaged my healing scars and helped numbed nerves reawaken. I felt cleansed after allowing my body to rest and simply exist as it is.

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met Syd a couple of years ago at my local climbing gym, Brooklyn Boulders. They were my first friend who had taken steps to medically transition. They had top surgery a few years before I met them and I saw in them a potential future for myself where I could feel comfortable in my body. Going outdoors for the first time without tits was going to be an emotional journey, but I couldn’t map out my future feelings like a road trip. It was a long six months waiting for my scars to heal, and I was anxious to take my chosen body outdoors for the first time.

Climbing with Syd and their matching top surgery scars helped me feel less alone. Each time my chest brushed against rock I was forced to acknowledge my tenderness and strength. It was startling to feel the cool roughness of rock on such fresh skin, my scars still sensitive from the trauma of surgery. I could feel skin pulling to accommodate a reach, but other movements felt smooth, fluid, and strong.

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op surgery has helped my dysphoria subside, but the scars left traversing my torso make my transness impossible to hide. As we ventured outdoors, away from our homes in liberal cities like New York, Oakland, and Boulder, I began to realize that my transition has made me less in control of how I am perceived and more vulnerable to transphobia. I was hyper aware of how we were looked at and kept tabs as people came and went from the hot springs and as groups passed us at the crag. I had anticipated internal tension while getting to know my new body, but had underestimated the weight of the risks that exposing it brings. I tried to relax and enjoy being in my chosen body outdoors, but I knew I could not let my guard down completely.

Being seen can be scary but it can also be euphoric. Both Rae and Syd have always made me feel seen, especially when I couldn’t see myself. It was comforting to be with people who knew me so well and could relate to my experience in a trans body. They have known me and this body through its evolutions. As I got used to being shirtless and exposing my scars I began to feel more authentically me.

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his trip was a big step in normalizing my non-normative body. It helped me come to terms with how I am perceived and what it feels like to be seen. When I first started photographing I could barely look at the pictures. I wasn’t used to seeing this body reflected back at me. I began to wonder if my trans body was as wrong and grotesque as I had been told it was. However, as I spent more time photographing I began to see connections between the landscape and our trans bodies. These bodies that I had been told were wrong began to feel perfectly natural. The scars across our chests mimicked cracks in the rock. These cracks showed strength and told histories. Our bodies have proven themselves steady and strong, they grow and change through seasons much like the trees. I found beauty, grace and stillness in taking my trans body outdoors. I began to see that our trans bodies deserve the same tenderness and respect that we show toward the outdoors. As we swam and climbed, we became part of the landscape and the natural world.

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Nature Never Misgendered Me The first openly transgender woman to compete in the Freeride World Tour shares her story of finding acceptance in the mountains JENNIFER GURECKI | @yogurecki

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here is an absurdity in the juxtaposition of the snowsports industry and people’s everyday existence that challenges Hannah Aram. As a queer feminist, activist, and artist, who also happens to be a world class skier, exploring what lies in between those two realms is what has brought her back to being on her own terms after years of grief and loss. Her trajectory in skiing, and in life, has been a circuitous exploration of self-acceptance and community building.

Her story of survival and perseverance is not an easy one to tell. To start, I’m not the one who should be writing this story. I don’t identify as a transgender woman. I’m not a survivor of violent aggression. I’ve never competed as an athlete in an atmosphere that is growing increasingly hostile toward non-cisgendered women. I have no way of fully understanding the lived experiences of someone who, because of the way they show up in the world, has been shunned by their family, friends, and community.

Perhaps it’s because of all of these reasons that it would be difficult for Aram to trust anyone. When I asked her if she wanted a transgender woman to write this story about her, she said no. Aram wanted me to tell a sliver of her story, simply because she knows me; 38

I’m safer than the unknowns. In the world that Aram exists in, it’s the unknowns that have been traumatic and life altering. The only consistent element in Aram’s life has been the mountains, a place she has found freedom and acceptance.

She Contains Multitudes

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arefully tucked between her mother’s legs, protected by the firm grip on her shoulders, Aram learned how to ski in the mountains of Scotland. It was a life of privilege that few people can afford, one that she is deeply grateful for. This connection to nature has always been a driving force in her life. Every time she leaves a perfectly carved line on a mountain, she thinks about the exhaled breaths of the thousands of people who also have convened in that space to heal.

The mountains hold space that Aram has not been able to find as a non-binary transgender woman.

The abundance of identities that Aram embraced has proven to be overwhelming, confusing, and frightening to her family and friends. Aram’s parents shunned her. She later enlisted in the military to “kill the woman inside.” She understands now how male military ranks, toxic masculinity, and their ideas about strength and

survival are all straw puppets that we must rip apart.

She later pursued a career in snowsports, working in marketing for a European brand. When Aram realized that she could no longer pretend to be someone she wasn’t, she lost nearly everyone and everything dear to her in the industry.

Aram in part blames this on herself.

“In many ways I’m responsible for losing my crew. I should have been representing for women, feminists, and trans people much, much earlier,” she said. “I was so scared. My survival strategy was all about me.”

What followed was a series of traumatic events that Aram is still working to recover from. She survived a violent transphobic attack in Germany, later becoming the victim of a justice system that tried to punish her rather than the men who attacked her. Aram was threatened with time in a men’s jail and lost her ability to work. In January of 2016, she fled Germany and became homeless in London

Tour (FWT), a series of professional competitive freeskiing and freeride events in which the best athletes compete for individual event wins, as well as the overall title of World Champion in their respective competitions.

“From a really young age I realized that the mountains were really the only place where I could be myself. The mountains were my only friend,” she said. “As I spent more time, they were more than a fun thing to do. They were part of my identity… Nature never misgendered me or hated on me. It always took me for what I was.”

so far to amplify their voices and not translate them into my own experiences,” she said.

Aram has her sights set on competing again in the FWT 2020, and is working to build the emotional muscle to manage what so many trans athletes are facing in sport— the debate about whether or not they should be competing against cisgender women. Aram looks up to Caster Semenya, the elite runner who has come under attack and been banned from certain events because of the high levels of testosterone in her body. While Semenya isn’t transgender—she was born with the typical male XY chromosome pattern but was legally recognized as female at birth and has identified as a woman her entire life—what she has had to endure reveals what happens to women, particularly Women of Color, when they don’t conform to societal stereotypes.

“I realized that the mountains were really the only place where I could be myself…

Nature never misgendered me or hated on me. It always took me for what I was.”

Returning To The Mountains

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t was when Aram reconnected to skiing that her life took a turn for the better. After returning to Germany through the love and support of her partner, in 2019 she became the first openly transgender woman to compete in the Freeride Wold

It’s the soul of skiing, not the industry or any perceived cachet that goes along with being an athlete, that Aram returns to time and time again. It’s what unites her with her friends from Lebanon, Uganda, and Kashmir. She’s quick to call out, however, how the color of her skin and her family’s participation in one of the more expensive sports in this world means that she has access to a platform that they likely never will.

Aram carefully chooses her words as she speaks about inclusivity, acknowledging she can’t speak for all women—transgender and cisgender. “I’m here to listen and learn, and I hope that I’ve learned enough

“You can’t keep a woman down for long. We are survivors. And then we thrive and we fuck shit up,” Aram said.

Want to follow Hannah’s progress in the FWT this season? Check out her website TheTransSkier.com and follow her activism and art on Facebook under the pseudonym Lara Holy.

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for the love of snow a skier bears witness to what once was Stephanie Maltarich | @steph.malt Early morning, my dad opens the door to my room, the light from the hallway shines so brightly that I squint. It’s still dark outside, but he announces: “It’s time to go skiing.” I roll out of bed with sleepy eyes and tangled hair. I start to dress in the clothes my mom helped me lay out the night before: first long johns, then wool ski socks, smoothing out any wrinkles as I slide them onto my feet. Next, I pull a wool sweater over my head, followed by snow bibs, carefully clicking each buckle below each shoulder. I pack a wool hat, goggles, gloves, and scarf into a bag. I’m ready.

Dad and I hop into the car and pull out of the driveway; it’s just me and him today. Often, we ski as a family, but today is a special day, just us. We drive along empty suburban streets and he turns on our favorite radio station. At the mandatory 7-11 stop, he buys me a Moon Pie, and coffee for himself, which I think smells bad. We navigate our way out of town by way of I-70; it’s the path to the mountains for those who live in Denver.

I fall asleep, head nodding to the hum of the Beach Boys or Creedence Clearwater Revival.

We are some of the first people to arrive at the empty parking lot. He helps me organize my things: making sure that I have the hat, goggles, scarf, and gloves that I packed. It’s cold today, so I grab hand warmers to keep in my pocket, just in case. My ski jacket is adorned with a few pins from my favorite ski re40

sorts: Breckenridge, Keystone, and Copper Mountain. I wear them proudly, and I’m able to recite my favorite ski runs at each. Schoolmarm, Carefree, and Silverthorne, to name a few.

Stepping into the rental shop, we are greeted by the familiar smell of hot wax and old boots. Screeching reverberates from the back of the shop, where ski techs grind and sharpen bases and edges. While my dad fills out the paperwork, I am helped by a scruffy bearded shop employee who helps fit me for my boots and skis. We chit chat; he asks me what I like to ski and tells me how the snow has been lately.

My dad carries both of our skis over his shoulder as I waddle along the sidewalk in ski boots. While he waits in line to purchase our lift tickets, I twirl around in a daydream, sometimes catching snowflakes if and when they fall. Looking back, I know as a twirling little girl, I didn’t realize how lucky I was. I didn’t notice that everyone around me looked the same, like me: white, middle/upper class, outfitted in ski gear, with friends and family. Back then, I never thought about the people who weren’t skiing, or why I rarely saw people of color on the slopes. Or that I was fortunate that my family had both the time and money to spend on an activity that many people didn’t have access to enjoy. It was a privilege beyond my comprehension, one that I often think about today.

Squatting down to my level, my dad feeds the wire wicket through the zipper on my jacket. He removes the paper from the back to expose its sticky side, carefully folding it over the wire while pressing firmly to smooth out the bubbles. He does the same for himself and we are finally ready. “How about a warm-up run?” he asks.

I’m giddy as I click into my skis and glide into the lift line. We always ski bell to bell, skier talk for open to close. We move downhill with ease on the freshly groomed corduroy, each carving our own art into the snow. We finish a run and quickly plan for the next and then the next on the chairlift. On our lunch break, I inhale a cheeseburger and french fries. I drink hot chocolate with whipped cream; in the coming days, the burned spot on my tongue will serve as a happy reminder of a day spent on the mountain.

I don’t remember if this was one day or 20.

We weren’t a family of extreme skiers; we skied maybe a handful of times each year from the mid-’80s through the mid-’90s until our schedules became too busy and my dad lost his job. As Midwest transplants, we planted our roots out West as a family, through skiing.

I do remember skiing fast and giggling. I remember freezing cold chairlifts. I remember the excitement I felt the night before a ski day. I remember running my finger along the lines on the map: green, blue, and black. I remember the quiet snow on a powder day.

I remember freedom from the simple movement and gravity of sliding downhill on the snow. More than any specific moment, I remember that feeling, the feeling of joy.

That feeling is at risk. Climatic changes are shifting the story of winter, shifting the story of skiers. Winter matters to skiers. It matters to who we are, the relationships we have, and the culture and survival of mountain towns. When my family started skiing in 1986, we didn’t think much about climate change. We noticed bizarre weather, but we never worried. Most days today, I notice the weather, and I think about climate change, a lot.

What was once a sure thing, marked by real snow and cold winters, is now unpredictable. It is even more unpredictable for the future. I know a love for skiing isn’t going to solve climate change. This threat leaves me thinking about how skiing is an important part of my life and my identity. I feel lost without the movement of the seasons and my skis beneath my feet. Whether it’s the simple joy of turning on snow downhill, or the memories with friends and family, or the lifestyle in a mountain town, I don’t want to lose this. I can’t. Skiing, I think, keeps something inside of me alive, and for the love of snow, for the love of this planet, for the love of what makes us human. I want to save it.

But I don’t know how, or if it’s possible, because I know that trying to save skiing won’t save us from climate change.

I know that I can call my representatives and march in the streets in an attempt to disrupt business as usual. But when I think about how slowly we are responding to a problem that requires our immediate attention and fast action, I worry about the future of skiing and skiers. They say we are running out of time. They’ve said we have 12 years to limit catastrophe. This problem, as we know, is about much more than saving skiing. But skiing is one way I know how to understand the gravity of climate change.

So, I will keep skiing, and I will keep writing, bearing witness to what once was. And I’ll reminisce about what it was like on those long car rides into the mountains and that feeling on a powder day. And I will continue to have some hope in humanity, knowing that complex thinking and ingenious ideas could surely help us avoid the worst case scenario. If we can, we will still be able to ski, if we can tolerate warmer conditions and fewer powder days.

And that’s the hope that I can hold onto.

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guardians Artwork by WYETH MOSS |

@wyethmoss

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about wyeth moss I’m currently in a state of transition, so what I feel defines me is constantly changing. I feel that my dedication to my work and my connection and pull to nature are defining elements in my life. I also feel at the intersection of so many different things, race and gender specifically.

I use drawing, sculpture, and installation to explore the connections between healing, nature, identity, ancestral remedies and folklore, meditation, trauma, and mental illness. Coming from a lineage of Dominican curanderas, I have been drawing from my heritage and personal experience to investigate memory and transgenerational methods of healing.

The figures seen within my work serve as the depiction of a spiritual connection between guardians and descendants.

Touch and protection play a large role in my work as guardians are often extending their embrace to their lineage in the midst of overcoming trauma and/or mental illness. This meeting of ancestry occurs within an unconscious realm in which gender is non-binary—the guardians are a unique entity, as well as a reflection of their descendants. They are imperfect and heavily flawed, but their flaws also serve as their strength and power.

When I first started drawing seriously, my work was solely based on my unconscious.

I didn’t know who my imagery was of or

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who I wanted them to be. I was fiercely against setting concepts to my work and hated the idea that it had to be more than “It is itself and nothing else.” What changed for me was really delving into sorting and healing my trauma, realizing that the refusal to set those perimeters within my work was a product of me repressing what I needed to come to terms with. Seeing how connected my work was to what I was going through was really difficult at first. It meant that every time I made work, I was reflecting on my trauma of childhood/sexual abuse. What once brought me a meditative escape became the biggest source of painful reflections. It took me years to be able to be okay with realizing those themes and pain in my work and to take it from solely being about trauma to starting to move into a more aware and healed state.

I’ve been exploring the idea of my work being my visual interpretation of ancestors and their descendants meeting/ interacting, as well as embracing my body, my heritage, trying to find a balance and a unity in my gender. Currently I’m working on defining my figures and figuring out the universes they live within—creating sculptures and installations helps me to define this by bringing these figures into a tangible form and really reflecting on the narrative all of the elements of my installations come together to tell.

“Am I a hopeless dreamer, or was I born at the wrong time?�

-Barbara Hillary The First African-American Woman to Travel to the North Pole 88 Years Old

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mountain biking 101, 201, + 301

'Cause we all got to start somewhere Lindsey Richter | @ladiesallride Founder of Liv Ladies AllRide Mountain Bike Skills Camps: Powered by SRAM

i did it because

w

it was fun

A look back on skiing from a trailblazing athlete in a time when extreme skiing was a fledgling sport dominated by men JENNIFER GURECKI | @yogurecki

e too easily forget the women who came before us. The ones who metaphorically and literally broke trail. Kim Reichhelm is one of those women, yet she has accomplished what few professional skiers have been able to: staying relevant and maintaining a career into her 50s. It’s been a thoughtful mix of professionalism, preparedness, and just the right amount of bravado.

As the defining force behind women’s big mountain skiing in the 52

late ’80s and early ’90s, Reichhelm came onto the scene when skiing was simply fun. There was little pressure to be featured in movies or gain sponsors. Things have changed now, and pretty dramatically. “Now it’s big time; it’s serious,” she said.

“If they’re not taking chances they aren’t going to win, and that makes it tough… if you want to be at the top of your game, you’re going to get hurt.”

Besides young women athletes of today pushing the limits on what it means to “ski like a girl,” there’s

one thing that concerns her. “I’m always asking them where are you going to go from here, and I get, ‘I don’t know.’ That’s not really an answer. You need to start asking yourself this question and find out how to make your career viable in 10 years.” She blames this in part on the false sense of security that social media has created—the idea that if you have a lot of followers, you are successful. Reichhelm wants these young women to consider who they are, what they stand for, and the depth of their message.

Despite this, Reichhelm admits to being a tad bit jealous of the new generation of skiers for one reason: There’s more opportunity. “When I was a girl I was making it up, trying to be one of the boys.

Now these girls have role models.”

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Like you, Kim.

eyond the injuries that athletes have always endured, she knew getting into the industry that the careers of professional skiers were short lived. In the height of her career—and arguably still to this day—very few people earned a real paycheck. Envisioning her ski career in a pre-Instafamous world, she studied marketing in college.

She worked at a ski company and apparel company. She relentlessly walked the floor at the Snowsports Industry of America trade show. “I did everything I could to be prepared as an athlete and professional ski racer,” she said. That meant thinking beyond her few minutes of fame in License to Thrill and that time she sat on David Letterman’s couch. Instagram hadn’t even been invented yet, so the concept of being able to build your own platform was far more difficult than it is today.

“I wanted women to love the sport as much as I do. I wanted to help them get through the barriers so that they do it forever,” This thoughtfulness she nurtured early on in her career, paired with the work ethic her Wall Street father instilled in her, allowed her to see beyond the notoriety of big mountain professional skiing and into her life’s passion—running women’s only ski clinics. It was during her time on the women’s pro tour that she began to notice that women learned how to ski differently than men. And when learning to ski with men, they often withered or opted to stay in the lodge.

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It all started to click for her after a day on the hill when she decided to ski with the wives and girlfriends instead of with the boys, as she normally did. Reichhelm knew the sneak route that avoided the steep cornice and opened up into beautiful fields of powder. “I felt so good about myself that I made the tiniest sacrifice of not showing off and instead skiing in a safer, more controlled manner—the reward felt better than any race I had won,” she said. It also was incredibly empowering for her and it gave her a tremendous amount of pleasure.

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ot everyone believed that she could be successful with women’s only ski clinics and camps. At the time, women represented about 30% of snowsports participants and the majority of the industry didn’t believe in her vision. There also weren’t a lot of women who either owned a business or held a role in upper management in the snowsports. Reichhelm noted that not much has changed and she attributes this to the lack of money and opportunity. “Women are smarter than that; they want more,” she said.

None of this deterred her, however. “I wanted women to love the sport as much as I do. I wanted to help them get through the barriers so that they do it forever,” she said. So she pushed and sacrificed and made things up along the way so that Women’s Ski Adventures would become a reality.

More than 20 years later, Women’s Ski Adventures is a world-renowned program offering women a chance to ski in a fun, safe, supportive, and relaxing environment while also taking their skiing abilities to the next level.

Reichhelm has been very purposeful in choosing to not grow it exponentially or take it corporate. It’s her way of staying connected to the sport she loves.

“It makes me feel so good every day I ski with those women. Every day I’m making a difference in their lives way beyond skiing. Taking chances, overcoming fear, loving a sport that makes them feel good. I started it for selfish reasons but I’m so lucky to be making a living doing this,” she said.

Reichhelm is fortunate to lead the life she does, and so are young women today who better understand their potential because they have seen what is possible. There also has to be a small amount of joy in knowing that she can say “I told you so” to all of the men who never believed that women’s skiing would be a viable market. And skiing is better for everyone because of that.

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life & skifr hacks

om Kim Reichhelm

* * * * * *

Get some instruction, even if it’s just a two hour group lesson.You don’t need a private lesson, you just need something to focus on. It’s almost impossible to improve if you don’t, and a great way is to take a video of yourself and watch it to see where you can improve.

Guys grow up learning that it’s OK to make mistakes but they don’t learn to think before they open up their mouths; women are constantly putting ourselves in check. Men are saying stupid things and acting inappropriately and they’re OK with that. Women need a little of that; we don’t need to be perfect.

Make sure your boots are working properly. The plastic deteriorates in old boots and they no longer support your legs. It makes it much more difficult to ski fluidly and in control. That’s by far the most important piece of equipment and they should not be tight or painful.

Loyalty, especially in an industry that is so small, will pay off. The guy you told to piss off last year is now the president of the company you want to be sponsored by this year.

The most valuable thing I can teach someone is to look ahead—look three turns ahead and have a plan. If you’re not looking ahead, you are reacting and you can’t ski gracefully. Anticipate what you need to do.

We need keep fighting the fight. We need companies to address the needs of women and be supportive of those companies who are willing to listen and make change.

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Roller Skiing To The Top How herself

one

woman

through

is her

creating love

of

a

new the

life

for

mountains

Charlotte Massey | @peak_charlotte_

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ost women in India marry and spend their days raising children and caring for their husband’s parents. Not Thakur Bhuwneshwari. She runs up hills, rock climbs, and roller skis. You also can add entrepreneur to that list.

“I don’t want to do things in a room,” Bhuwneshwari, 37, affectionately called Bhuvi by her friends and the children she teaches at an outdoor education program in Manali, India said. “I want to go up and down, here and there. I want to be in the mountains.”

Bhuvi is one of India’s top cross-country ski racers and has won multiple Indian and Southeast Asian Championships, despite growing up in a community without cross-country ski trails.

Bhuvi’s town, Manali, is nestled in the Solang Valley at the base of the Indian Himalaya in the northern Himachal Pradesh state. Waterfalls cascade down cliff walls surrounding the valley. The yearly monsoon paints the landscape a rich emerald green with leafy tropical plants, and the high altitude pines and lush valleys sit in stark contrast with the sharp, snow-covered 5,000 meter peaks of the Pir Panjal range. Manali has the rare and perfect mix of high altitudes and wet monsoon clouds to create one of India’s few skiing destinations.

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The Solang Ropeway and Ski Center is gaining popularity now that ski areas in nearby Kashmir are politically more difficult to access. Like many locals, Bhuvi taught herself to ski in the sloping apple orchards that her parents and grandparents work in, using wooden equipment that she built herself. She’d always been most comfortable outside—her brother says that she walked like a mountain goat on their first overnight trek. Bhuvi took to skiing and was speedy and surefooted on the slopes.

When Bhuvi was 18 years old, a friend recommended she participate in a ski competition specifically for people with wooden skis. Nearly all the racers were men and Bhuvi stood out as one of only a handful of girls. She finished in first place, beating everyone—including the boys.

Following this feat, Bhuvi borrowed professionally made cross-country skis from a neighbor and competed in a larger local race. This time she came in second.

Bhuvi wanted to test just how far she could take her ski racing, but there are no cross-country ski trails in Manali. She could only do dry land training, like running and mimicking the skiing motion on long, specialized roller skates called roller skis. “I found power from transforming my skills and efforts into accomplishments,” she said.

Cross-country skiing is an expensive sport.

Racers usually compete in two styles, skating and classic. Each style requires a different set of skis and poles, and Bhuvi’s family invested a huge amount of resources into buying equipment. Bhuvi had to learn skills for the preparation of her skis as well. Racers must melt specialized waxes into the bases of their skis to help the skis slide across different temperatures of snow. Bhuvi didn’t have access to expensive wax and arrived at the 2009 Nordic World Ski Championship in the Czech Republic with only candle wax. A coach from another team lent her some professional wax which helped her compete on the international stage.

Bhuvi has never limited herself to cross-country skiing. She also has alpine ski raced, worked as a trekking and climbing guide, and is constantly expanding her outdoor passions. After 18 years of working as a guide for companies owned by men, she has a new dream—starting Himalayan Women Outdoor, an adventure company for women. She’s put off racing since 2017 to focus on starting her company. “My goal is to provide trips for women who wouldn’t feel comfortable spending time outside without a woman guide,” she said. This is a groundbreaking concept in Manali.

“Women feel unsafe when they go outdoors. When they go with women, they feel safe,” she explained. “Women should not be stuck inside.” Bhuvi is working hard to provide economic opportunities for women in Manali and her life shows that there can be a future outside the home if that’s what a girl chooses.

Bhuvi wants everyone to be able to explore the mountains, ski the snowy slopes, and climb Manali’s cliffs. Everyone should be able to go up and down, here and there.

Himalayan Women Outdoors is her solution to get more women outside, up mountains, and into their own independence.

Artwork by

Allyson Stevens and Charlotte Massey |

@allykatartshop @peak_charlotte_

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Dream or Delusion?

The Truth Travel Influencers Don’t Tell Erika Fitzgerald | @erikafitzgerald_

A new wave of remote workers are traveling to exotic locations to escape the 9-5 grind—but is the location-independent lifestyle really all it’s cracked up to be? Or are we desperately seeking freedom in a world where nothing is free?

20-something creative entrepreneurs from Sydney, a 22-year-old software engineer from Moscow, a handful of travel bloggers, and a 24-year-old German girl who created a dating app for nomads— and me, a writer from California.

It’s 11:40 am on Thursday when the last few shuffle in and take a seat around the conference room table. Bamboo lines the room from floor to ceiling with AC pumping through the vents. Monkeys patter across the roof.

These presentations happen every Tuesday and Thursday at the co-working space in Ubud, Bali, an establishment where remote workers from all over the world congregate to earn a living from their laptops. Topics range from personal branding and website development to more abstruse ones like brain optimization and investing in cryptocurrency. Attendees are typically in their 20s and 30s, equipped with MacBooks, loose-fitting tank tops made in China, and whole fresh coconuts impaled by plastic straws. Their energy is relaxed but eager.

They left the security of their corporate careers to chase the whisper of limitless opportunity, freedom, and wealth. The coveted six-to-seven figure incomes of digital entrepreneurs like Brian and Gary V.

Everyone in the room is barefoot, their rubber flip-flops piled outside next to the daily offerings of incense, rice, and flowers. Canang sari.

At the front of the room, a fitness entrepreneur named Brian paces back and forth prepping to give a presentation on how he went from homeless to six figures in six months. The small room is packed well beyond American capacity limits. In the audience: a 34-year-old woman who founded a coconut water company in Breckenridge, a couple of

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Headlines call them digital nomads. If you ask them where they’re from, they’ll tell you they’re location-independent. Whatever you call it, the surge of remote workers has grown enormously in recent years as more freelancers and entrepreneurs optout of office life to live on their own terms—which in many cases means wandering around Southeast Asia in search of a poolside lounge with wi-fi and shitty cocktails priced like water.

Some of them are running away: from bad relationships, bad jobs, bad politics. Others are running to see the world before it disappears. Before the coral reefs crumble, the rainforests disappear, and the sandy beaches turn into plastic peninsulas. “Quick,” says the little voice in their head, “see the world while you still can!”

Brian concludes his presentation with a photo.

In it, he flexes with a first-place trophy at a bodybuilding competition. “One day, I woke up on my friend’s couch, broke and homeless and hungover, and visualized this exact picture. Every day, I visualized it until it happened.” His phone alarm goes off every hour as a reminder to stop, drop everything, and manifest the next big goal.

Everyone claps and files out of the air-conditioned conference room. In the lobby, a couple of guys compare scrapes from separate scooter incidents while the local community manager enthusiastically recruits people for an upcoming beer pong tournament. If you didn’t know otherwise, you might guess that this was A) a college dorm or B) a Silicon Valley startup.

In reality, it’s neither. This co-working space is one of many capitalizing on people’s desire to live independently together. The strange thing about this lifestyle is that you aren’t entirely an expat. But you aren’t entirely a tourist either. You exist entirely in between. Pouring yourself another beer at Dubai International. Waiting for the immigration officer to pound the next stamp into your passport.

The society of digital nomads tends to congregate in low-cost cities with high quality of life: Bali,

Chiang Mai, Bangkok, Ho Chi Minh, Lisbon. When they tire of co-working spaces, they shift to cafes with cheap coffee and free wi-fi. The line between new friends and potential income sources is often blurry. Everyone has a motive.

They left the corporate ladder only to climb a new one—to the top of Google search results, internet fame, and media mentions. Desperate to fund their freedom lifestyle. But at what cost?

It’s 2:13 am in the hours between Sunday night and Monday morning, when I used to lay awake dreading the week ahead. Wayan picks us up outside our villa and begins the pitch dark ascent towards Mount Batur—one of the most-trekked volcanoes on Bali. The night is cool and quiet in contrast to the daytime buzz of scooters and roosters. Through tired eyes, Batur takes shape in the distance, looming in the dusty night sky over a mirrored lake.

Wayan parks and we pile out onto the dirt road, equipped with headlamps and water bottles. We file through the dark until we reach a fork in the trail. “The easy way or the hard way?” Wayan asks, explaining that tourists who hire motorbikes take the easy way. We choose the hard way. Straight up. A cross between hiking and bouldering, with enough humidity to make even a fit person puke at 4:30 am.

The line between new friends and potential income sources is often blurry. Everyone has a motive.

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As we approach the summit, a hum of voices materialize into a crowd of at least 300 other foreigners perched on rows of makeshift benches facing east.

Wayan gestures us to an open seat and then joins the other guides to prepare coffee, banana sandwiches, and hard-boiled eggs from a small outpost erected from raw branches and plastic tarps. Our once in a lifetime experience is everyday routine for the local guides who make the trek up Batur each morning before sunrise.

To our right, a girl in a floral skirt and strappy sandals flips through a series of rehearsed poses while her guide snaps photos. Overhead, a swarm of drones buzzes, capturing the same shot on repeat.

These people are part of a new generation raised on connectivity and internet likes. They travel on disposable income or credit card debt and a need for recognition in a world where anyone can generate a fan base if they put in enough screen time. But is it worth it?

The sun rolls over Mount Batur and I rejoin my barefoot contemporaries at the co-working space in the afternoon to catch up on emails sent from 15 time zones away. A man with a British accent speaks firmly into his phone. His latest round of funding fell through and, from the sounds of it, he’s going to need a one-way ticket back to the UK. I hit “send” on my last email when Helena from Breckenridge walks over to my desk in the open workspace. “A few of us are going to a women’s full moon circle tonight. Want to come?” she asks, sipping on a fresh coconut. “Sure,” I shrug, sliding my laptop into my backpack.

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Everyone is instructed to meet at a nearby vegan cafe at 6:00 pm to carpool to an undisclosed temple.

The girls from my co-working office wave me over to a family-style table in the middle of the cafe. I take the last open seat and order a virgin piña colada.

A steady stream of women wearing an assortment of crochet tops, long skirts, and decorative piercings slowly fill the cafe, exchanging exaggerated hugs. Around half-past-six, a woman with long brown dreadlocks raises her arms and the room falls silent. “Ladies, welcome. We’re going to travel together to the temple nearby,” she commands. “Follow me.”

Outside, a cabal of scooters waits to take us to the temple. The air smells of nectar and exhaust.

I hesitate, looking around for a helmet, before jumping on the back of a red Scoopy with a blonde-haired girl.

Later, she introduces herself as Anna from Copenhagen. She landed in Bali six hours ago for an eight-week yoga teacher training.

The life of a digital nomad is incidental and bizarre. It’s transient and transactional and as unimportant as anyone else’s life.

At the temple, at least 100 women form a circle around a fire pit. An American woman with a tribal collar tattoo steps into the center and invites each of us to offer something into the fire. Something we want to let go.

I rip a shred of paper from my journal, fill it with the word “expectations,” and toss it into the fire. Once everyone has made their offering, the woman with the dreadlocks speaks, reminiscing on her history of addiction. “I was so sick, I couldn’t even brush my hair. That’s when it started to dread,” she shares, as two other women begin the task of cutting her dreads off and throwing them into the flames. The women begin to howl. Smoke sinks upward into the moonlit sky.

Over the past year, my partner and I traveled and worked from 11 different countries around the world. In the months leading up to our one-way flight out of LAX, we meticulously sifted through everything we owned.

We packed anything with meaning into a 5x10 storage unit and donated the rest.

When people asked when we were coming back, our answer was: “We don’t know.” But as the months wore on, I longed for a sense of familiarity. Loading up my 80L backpack, triple checking for my passport, and going through airport security became routine.

The life of a digital nomad is incidental and bizarre. It’s transient and transactional and as unimportant as anyone else’s life. A lifestyle—like any other—marketed by social media influencers, bloggers, and companies that depend on us never going home. But I wonder, is our frantic need to see the world before it’s gone doing more harm than good?

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Hemp T a k e o v e r

Four Hemp-Based Products to Fuel Your Outdoor Adventure ERICA ZAZO | @onecurioustrvlr CBD. THC. Cannabis. Hemp. These buzzwords are making waves in the news, and they’re also making their way into the outdoor industry.

Hemp plants—cannabis plants that have less than 0.3 percent THC (aka that stuff that gets you ‘high’)—are being used for all sorts of outdoor products, from material for boots and socks to additives in food. And cannabidiol, or CBD, is being extracted from hemp plants to use in drinks, oils, topicals, and more. CBD-lovers say it helps with aches and pains, muscle tension, relieving anxiety, and healing skin irritation and inflammation.

Hemp is also one of the most sustainable and versatile plants on the planet. It produces twice as much oil as peanuts per acre, nearly four times as much fiber as an acre of trees (when used to make paper), and can be harvested just 120 days after planting, according to the National Association of Hemp. Some sources even say hemp has the ability to extract carbon from the air, rebuild the soil, and ultimately, contribute to reducing climate change. That means more growing opportunity, more product, and a cleaner earth.

Prominent brands like Patagonia are using industrial hemp for textiles to make clothing and apparel because hemp stands up to sweat, odor, and wear-and-tear that otherwise causes clothes to reach their breaking point. And small businesses are popping up all over the States using CBD oil in their products for its restorative qualities.

Whether you’re a hemp die-hard, or interested in trying out CBD-infused goods for the first time, here are some of our favorite outdoor-focused hemp products: cially-conscious, female-centric, hemp-derived topicals brand. Two years later, business is now booming. Skiers, boarders, mountain bikers, surfers, hikers, and other outdoor athletes are buying up Hatshe’s CBD products because of its impact on aches, pains, stiffness, and relaxing stressed out muscles after exercise.

Hatshe Hatshe.com By day, Britni Jessup works as an Interiors Director at an architecture firm. At night, she’s slinging CBD-infused topicals made by women, for athletes, at her company Hatshe Blends. Hatshe’s full spectrum of hemp-oil products, which includes oils, cremes, salves, and lotions, are all made from organic and locally sourced hemp in Oregon.

Britni started Hatshe after the original group of men she was working with at their recreational cannabis farm refused to give her credit, or even pay her for the work she was putting into the company. After a lot of dreaming, conceptualizing, and designing, Britni and her business partner Tanja set out on their own to build a so62

Kate’s Real Food KatesRealFood.com When she wasn’t able to find an energy bar that didn’t taste like a piece of cardboard packed full of unhealthy ingredients, self-described ski bum, Kate Schade, set out to make her own. After long days of skiing in Jack-

son Hole, Kate worked tirelessly in her kitchen to craft an energy bar that was wholesome, functional, and great tasting. Bringing her creations to the slopes to hand out samples in the lift line, she finally figured out her winning recipe––a mix of hand-rolled, quality ingredients with no artificial sweeteners and no GMOs. Kate’s Real Food bars comes in six different flavors, but a true stand-out is the Peanut Butter Hemp & Flax bar. Look at the back of the label and you actually know all of the words in the ingredient list. The bar has organic hemp seeds in it, which include all nine of the essential amino acids (that stuff that improves muscle mass, reduces fatigue, and helps with soreness after a workout). Hemp seeds provide protein without the bloating, contain high amounts of vitamin E (which acts as an antioxidant), and have been linked to the improvement of immune deficiencies.

that’s used in its shoe line goes the extra mile by holding its color, preventing odor, and keeping its shape, even when it gets wet and worn. Astral’s new Hemp Loyak shoe is durable, antimicrobial, and odor-resistant. The gender-neutral shoe works great for travel, getting around the city, and as a light-weight option to bring as a camp shoe. For a more rugged option, they also created the HaleStorm boot, which combines a grippy rubber sole with a hemp canvas material. The boot is waterproof yet breathable, and perfect for rain, slush, sleet or snow. The sustainable hemp upper provides comfort and durability.

Royal Robbins RoyalRobbins.com

Astral Astral.com Versatile, hardy, and resilient, hemp is one of the most sustainable resources for fabric. From an aesthetic sense, hemp can be woven fine to mimic cotton. But unlike cotton, hemp does not require pesticides, can crowd out weeds without the use of herbicides, and takes 21 percent less water to grow. All reasons why Astral, an outdoor brand with a strong focus on sustainability and low environmental-impact production, uses hemp for their shoes.

The casual, outdoor adventure brand launched a new line of hemp footwear this year that mixes style, performance, and sustainability. The brand says the hemp

Similar to hemp boots, brands are finding other usecases for turning hemp into textiles for apparel products. Royal Robbins, a legacy brand in the outdoor industry, is using hemp to create apparel like socks, shirts, and pants. The company grew out of a passion for creating clothing that could stand up to an extremely adventurous lifestyle, while honoring and protecting the environment. Which is why hemp fits well into its eco-forward clothing line.

Made from a sustainable hemp and yak material blend, the brand’s new Quarter Sock has mesh ventilation, flex material on the ankle that keeps it from bunching, and compression. Because hemp yarns are inherently odor resistant, temperature regulating, moisture managing, and comfortable, Royal Robbins socks are great to bring while traveling, walking longdistance, or staying active outside.

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How Not To Be A Climate Change Activist Like A Basic Bitch from the creator of “how not to travel like a basic bitch: where race and travel intersect”

Kiona | @hownottotravellikeabasicbitch Climate change is a global issue and affects travel destinations worldwide. However, not all travel destinations are affected equally.

Some travel destinations are affected more than others, and within those destinations, there are people who are more vulnerable than others. The people who are disproportionately affected by climate change tend not to be who we pay attention or listen to and that needs to change.

There’s more. The Philippines have 17 million Indigenous Peoples from 134 different ethnic groups living on the island. That means 17 million people have ancestral ties to the land that they’ve been living off of since time immemorial. These people are disproportionately affected by climate change because their very survival depends on maintaining the environment, in addition to their spirituality revolving around it.

Who’s Criminalized & Murdered For Trying To Save The Environment?

Not only are these Indigenous Peoples dying due to climate change, they are willing to give their lives for the protection of the Earth. It is life or death to them. It is not an option. They are at the forefront of climate activism at every protest. And according to the Global Witness Report 2018, three environmental activists are murdered every week by resource extraction corporations; the Philippines is number one in environmental killings. That doesn’t include those who are criminalized for defending the land or the environment.

Let’s travel to the Philippines. The Philippines is an archipelagic country in the Pacific Ocean consisting of about 7,641 islands.

It also sits on the Ring of Fire, making the Philippines vulnerable to earthquakes, hurricanes, and typhoons even before you throw climate change into the mix.

The increasing water levels due to climate change bring in so many floods that at one point, 80 percent of the capital, Manila, was under water. Read that again: 80 percent.

When it comes to climate change, Filipinxs are directly affected today.

Now pause. Can you name a Filipinx climate activist living in the Philippines? Did you even know that the Philippines have created a long-term strategy for prioritizing climate smart industry and sustainable energy? The Philippines feel climate change with a sense of urgency and as such are responding to it with vigor, yet it’s likely you’ve never even heard of the measures they’re taking to mitigate climate change.

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So has the world ever offered a Filipinx activist a global platform?

The answer is no.

Not All Climate Activists Are Created Equal The media whitewashes, silences, and erases those directly impacted by climate change. Take for example the most visible climate activist, 16-year-old Greta Thunberg.

She’s doing her part to speak out against climate change, yet she experiences no direct impacts of climate change. There are other

Not only are these Indigenous Peoples dying due to climate change, they are willing to give their lives for the protection of the Earth. It is life or death to them. It is not an option. They are at the forefront of climate activism at every protest. child activists not only speaking out, but creating programming based directly on their environmental experiences as their relatives die around them. The difference is that Greta experiences no direct danger due to environmental impacts, while those in the Philippines and the Amazon, to name a few, do. Yet she gets a platform and the others don’t.

Why is that? The answer is the privilege of being white.

Let me put this into a different context for you.

Childbearing is a global issue. Reproductive health affects everyone. Without healthy adults who can produce children, the human race dies. However, reproductive health issues seem to impact women more than any other group. Yet it is primarily men who create laws around reproductive rights. How do you feel about that?

Yes, women’s reproduction affects all men, just like climate change affects everyone. But that doesn’t mean men should be the authority because they don’t experience it as intimately as women. No man needs to make decisions or solutions for women, nor do they need to be the spokesperson for women’s reproductive rights.

You can apply this same logic to climate change.

The people who we need to listen to are those affected by climate change today and have the appropriate solutions for their environments and their homes. These are the people that need to be positions as change makers. And we need to recognize that while it is important that we all speak out about it and do our part, it is equally important to understand those who are being impacted now and listen to them when they call for help.

Protect Them And Pass The Fucking Mic Being a climate change activist is not as easy as being for or against climate change. There are already Indigenous Peoples fighting for global change who are advocating with their lives and dying for this cause. So just like not all travel destinations are affected equally, neither are climate change activists.

The whitewashing of a narrative that is meant for the most vulnerable populations, which have always been Brown and Black People, is not only problematic but incredibly dangerous. We are ignoring the most vulnerable of voices who have the most knowledge in order to save us.

Within that, there are race, class, and ableist issues at play here. While Indigenous Peoples globally are most vulnerable to climate change, within those populations, those who are disabled and/or living in economically disadvantaged countries have even less accessibility. They are most impacted by the change in the environment. Imagine being limited to a wheelchair or oxygen tank during a natural disaster.

These are real impending issues that not only need to be addressed on a climate level but also within the media. So today, I challenge you to find and support those who are fighting and dying for the environment today. They exist and they have solutions. Listen to them. Hire them. Save them. Support them. And be conscious of who you are listening to and uplifting in your everyday media consumption.

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poetry in motion lynne schmidt | @lynn_e_schmidt

Who Am I? I have stared in mirrors in lake reflections, in department store windows hoping to see what you see.

Am I the girl wearing these jeans?

But what then, about the scar on my arm— The one I cut out with a razor blade because my apartment lost heat and the pipes burst and it turned out my sister was right, I am useless.

I am a child.

I will never grow up.

My therapist told me I should have gotten stitches, should have gotten professional help, should have stopped drinking, but it’s the only thing I retained from childhood.

Not the toys, fake make-up, stuffed animals, but how drinks solve problems.

And so I roll over in bed, hoping your skin is more like moss on the roots of a tree, hoping to god that you can fill me, heal me, make me into the girl everyone else sees.

So when you put your clothes back on, I’m still looking for traces of me.

But you don’t.

So I find another and another after that.

Like eating Tic Tacs that refuse to freshen my breath.

Because the only time I recognize my face, is when I see the reflection in a broken picture frame, where the photograph smiles back.

Smiling so hard, because in small moments happiness comes easier.

There are twenty six seconds a day where depression doesn’t settle into bones.

And someone managed to take a picture.

And the floor broke the frame.

A flawless inside/perfect, Outside/defective story.

But you are not moss.

And I am not a tree.

So when you put your clothes back on, I’m still looking for traces of me.

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old habits die hard

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Tips for Winter self-preservation SAMANTHA ROMANOWSKI | @smilingsamantha

inter is upon us, whether we are prepared for it or not. By the end of each season, I am ready for the next one; I see this transition as an opportunity to reset, create new habits, and make lifestyle adjustments so I can feel more grounded and less stressed. Who doesn’t want that during the holidays and at the start of a new year?

Winter is a perfect time for rest, reflection, and restoration. As the life force around us slows down, it’s in our nature to do the same.

According to Chinese Medicine, winter is the time we should be nourishing our yin energy.

Think of yin and yang energy like those oldtimey oil lamps. Yin is the oil that allows the fire (yang) to burn. If the oil (yin) isn’t replenished, the fire (yang) will burn out. Our yin is nourished by deep, rejuvenating rest.

The kind that the dark, still days and nights of winter can provide.

It’s easy to move through our days and seasons without resting and reflecting, I get it.

You want to get out on the mountain or trail, meals have to be prepped, parties attended, and businesses run. But if we don’t take the time to rest and recharge when our bodies need it, we can set ourselves up for illness, exhaustion, and stress.

Remember hygge? It was all the rage in 2018.

Getting cozy in your thick socks, next to a fire with candles and a book and those itty bitty twinkle lights and mug of something delicious sounds awesome, but that doesn’t have to be the only way you rejuvenate this winter. Truly nurture yourself with some of these ideas instead:

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lifestyle • Meditation. It’s the activity that will help us reconnect to ourselves. It allows us to pull away from habituated thought and emotion to connect to the deepest part of our being—our soul.

• Journaling. Reflect on your year—give yourself the space to appreciate what you’ve done and how your experiences have prepared you for what’s next.

• Warm baths or steamy showers, followed by a rubdown with deliciously scented oil.

Dry skin be gone!

nutrition • Eat appropriately for your climate. Food can enhance our ability to adapt to the environment. When it’s cold, eat food that will warm the body up.

• Replace that green smoothie with a mug of bone broth. Your body will be deeply grateful.

• Consume more cooked foods like soups and stews, which allow the body to expend less energy digesting. They also provide extra hydration.

• Grains, roots, and seeds help move the body’s energy inward.

• Healthy fats, dark leafy greens, and roasted root veggies are most nourishing to the body in winter.

feelin’ like a baller?

• Flotation therapy: Float in saltwater for deep relaxation.

• Infrared sauna: Sit in a superhot box to sweat your body into relaxing.

• Massage therapy: Get a rubdown to release tension.

• Halo therapy: Immerse yourself in the negative ions of a salt cave.

• Travel to a warm, sunny climate: Costa Rica surf retreat, anyone?

Samantha studied Amma Therapy at The Wellspring School for Healing Arts. She shares her practice of Chinese Medicine, Amma Therapy, and holistic nutritional consulting to those seeking alternative and complementary healthcare. You can learn more about her work at UnionHolisticHealthOc.com

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One Stitch Slouchy Y I

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A DIY project by:

Jamon Wolfe | @jamonwolfedesign Jamon is a senior in the Outdoor Product Design & Development program at Utah State University | @usuoutdoorproduct

STEPS 1. Measure head circumference.

2. Starting from the edge, mark half your head measurement on an inside-out sweater.

3. Mark nine inches up from the bottom of the sweater.

4. Use a plate to draw a rounded line down from the previous mark. Bring the line down to the bottom of the sweater.

5. Sew along the line.

6. Cut the slouchy out near the stitching.

7. Turn right-side-out and wear.

DAMN YOU LOOK GOOD 70

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Marketplace

Shop the latest additions to the Coalition Clubhouse...

Shred the Patriarchy CoalitionSnow.com Jen and Lauren, the Editor and Creative Director of Sisu, opened up their first brick-and-mortar retail store in Truckee, CA in November. You can think of it as a ski boutique that features an art gallery display of their Coalition Snow skis and snowboards, paired with inspired art and gifts from around the world.

Self Love CoalitionSnow.com To prepare for the grand opening, they partnered up with the woman-owned apparel and printing company, Wildbird Threads. Owner Elizabeth Bailey printed their entire collection of eco-friendly sweatshirts that features original Coalition Snow graphics and the artwork of Kika Macfarlane and Jocelyn Chantelle.

Wanderlust CoalitionSnow.com Our photographer Lauren McMillin managed to snag a few for herself and was lucky enough that her partner in crime, Rachel Blum, was handy behind the camera as well. Lauren has since reported that she lives in her Wanderlust sweatshirt. We don’t blame her.

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asking nicely CoalitionSnow.com When you’re busy juggling a career, a family, fun time, and everything else that you crush on the daily, sometimes you could use an extra hand to express yourself. Lauren designed this graphic for Jen for her epic cycling trip from Nairobi, Kenya to Cape Town, South Africa. She wore it nearly every day and has become one of her favorite pieces. Now it can be yours too.

Support Each Other CoalitionSnow.com Jocelyn Chantelle is a Brooklyn-based illustrator who uses her art to express her current state of mind. Having an anxiety disorder (PNES), she’s tried to take better care of herself by understanding herself, her emotions, and her needs. She realizes that it’s not about becoming perfect, but to always strive for improvement. She created this piece in hopes of viewing women as her supporters instead of competitors. Her aim was to recreate her relationship with women for the better.

Boogie Wild CoalitionSnow.com

Kika Macfarlane, the artist behind Boogie Wild and Wanderlust, has always been creating art and spending time in the outdoors, from her Colorado roots, to the last four years she’s spent living in Squamish, British Columbia, to her current home in Jackson, WY. While she’s a fan of anything that involves creativity or making, Kika’s medium of choice is digital illustration. She loves creating worlds inside of illustrations, using art as a platform for activism, and inspiring other women to get outside. When she’s not sketching or designing, you can find her deep in the backcountry on a pair of skis or with a backpack, depending on the season.

Visit us in Truckee all winter long at 10015 Palisades Drive to shop skis, read Sisu, and support women-owned and operated businesses.

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eat, drink, + be merry

cranberry

bliss bars

VANESSA BARAJAS | @vanessabarajas ‘Tis’ the season for Cranberry Bliss Bars! Let me preface this recipe by mentioning that I could house an entire box of Starbucks Cranberry Bliss Bars to myself.

In one sitting. They are one of my all-time favorites.

So I decided to make a gluten-free, grain-free, copycat version because why the hell not?! It’s Christmas!

Prep Time: 25 minutes Resting Time: 1 hour Cooking Time: 22-25 minutes Ready In: 1 hour 50 minutes Yield: 24 bars

Ingredients Cookie Layer

½ cup (70g) dried cranberries

12 tablespoons (170 g) salted butter, browned

frosting

2 cups (184 g) sifted fine- grain blanched almond flour 4 tablespoons (40 g) coconut flour 1½ teaspoons baking soda 1 teaspoon cream of tartar ¼ teaspoon fine-grain sea salt ¼ teaspoon ground ginger 1 cup (135 g) sifted maple sugar

16 ounces (452g) cream cheese, softened (see Notes for dairy-free option) 8 tablespoons (112g) unsalted butter, softened 1 cup (115g) (70g) powdered sugar, or sifted maple sugar ¼ cup (60ml) light-colored raw honey 1 teaspoon orange extract

2 large eggs, room temperature

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

½ cup (50g) finely chopped dried cranberries, for garnish

1 cup (6 oz./180 g) white chocolate, chips or chopped

½ cup (90g) white chocolate, chips or chopped, for garnish 74

Directions for the Cookie Layer: 1. Brown the butter by placing it in a mediumsized heavy-bottomed saucepan (2.5qt/2.3L) and cook over medium-low heat. Stir intermittently using a rubber spatula. As the butter melts, it will start to bubble and foam. As the butter continues to brown, the color will turn from lemon yellow to amber and go from a loud bubble to quiet simmer. When the butter is ready, brown specks will have formed at the bottom of the pan and some will start rise in the foam. The butter will also have a very pleasant nutty aroma. Remove from the heat and let cool for about 15 minutes. While butter is cooling prepare other ingredients.

2. In a large mixing bowl, combine the almond flour, coconut flour, baking soda, cream of tartar, ground ginger, and salt. Stir together using a fork until well combined; set aside. In a separate medium mixing bowl, add the maple sugar.

the dough reaches the edges of the pan. It will rise during baking. Bake for 22-25 minutes or until browned on the top and edges and a toothpick comes out clean. Make sure the middle is cooked through completely. Cool completely before frosting.

for the frosting Layer: 1. Add the cream cheese and butter to a large mixing bowl or to the bowl of a stand mixer.

Beat together using a hand mixer or stand mixer set on medium speed until fluffy and combined. Gradually add the sugar, beating well after each addition. Then add the honey, vanilla, and orange extract and continue to mix until smooth and creamy.

2. Use an angled frosting spatula to spread the frosting across the cookie layer. To garnish, sprinkle the dried cranberries across the frosting.

3. Once the butter has cooled, use a rubber spatula to transfer it into the maple sugar bowl, use the spatula to scrape in the browned bits as well. Beat together the butter and sugar with an electric mixer on low speed until combined, about 1 minute. Once the butter and sugar are mixed together, add eggs one at a time, mixing well after each, and then add the vanilla. Increase mixer speed to high and continue to beat until smooth bubbles appear on the surface, about 1 minute.

3. Melt the white chocolate in the top pan of a double boiler over simmering water. Stir until smooth. Another method is to place the white chocolate in a large glass or metal mixing bowl set over a saucepan of simmering water. Stir intermittently, using a rubber spatula, until the white chocolate is completely melted. Once melted, let slightly cool, then transfer to a piping bag or re-sealable plastic bag with the corner cut off. Drizzle across the top of the frosting.

4. Transfer the wet egg mixture to the dry mixture. Use the spatula to scrape out any remaining liquid in the bowl. Beat on low until thoroughly combined. Then mix in the white chocolate and cranberries by hand. Scrape the dough down into the bowl and cover with plastic wrap, pressing directly on the surface.

Place in the freezer to chill for one hour.

4. Use a large, sharp chef’s knife to cut into 12 squares, wiping the blade after each cut.

Then cut each square in half diagonally. Serve immediately. Store any leftovers covered in the refrigerator for up to 4 days.

5. About 15 minutes before the hour is up, adjust oven rack to the middle position. Preheat the oven to 350°F (177°C). Line a 9x13 quarter sheet pan with parchment paper; set aside.

6. Once the dough is chilled, use fingertips to grab some dough and spread the dough evenly across the pan. Place a piece of parchment paper over the dough and roll out until

Notes

To make these dairy-free, sub ghee for the butter (we recommend Tin Star Browned Butter Ghee or 4th Heart Ghee) and sub dairyfree cream cheese for the cream cheese in the frosting. Kite Hill makes a great dairy-free cream cheese and you can find their products in health food stores across the country.

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sisu

magazine

thaT's what he said

#priviledge ANDREW PRIDGEN | @andrewjpridgen

On an unseasonably warm fall afternoon in 2017, 29-year-old tech entrepreneur Josie Coleman was wrapping up a three-hour-long mountain bike ride on the Sawtooth Ridge overlooking the town of Truckee. When she and her companions noticed an open-house sign near the trailhead, they couldn’t resist but to pedal further up the road to check it out.

There, amid a dense patch of sugar pine, white fir, and quaking aspen, stood a boxy mid-century cabin painted a faded forest green. A black woodstove pipe spit out an alluring trail of smoke among the natural fauna and she knew at that instant, she had to have it.

And what better timing? Coleman’s Emeryville-based startup ShowEm is a design app that enables users to reimagine their spaces, not just with different colors, wallpaper, or flooring, but as what it really would look like to blow out the kitchen counter space, create a spare bedroom, and would that giant center island really fit? “Often times, people want these dramatic renovations that look so easy on TV,” Coleman said, “but then they get into it and it doesn’t work out. I’m into keeping the integrity of the space and letting the interiors breathe.”

Taking a small portion out of her monthly stipend from her trust (in 1956, Coleman’s great-grandfather invented the recipe for Raid for SC Johnson & Son and gave the patent to the company in exchange for an undisclosed sum and an undisclosed amount of stock), she was able to pay cash for the property that afternoon. And the renovation was to begin.

“I really wanted a place where I could use a Beta

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of my app and see how I could bring to new life a place I know has given families joy for decades,” she said, “...and will hopefully give mine joy for decades to come.”

When Jayce and Jessica LeVar met in Hawaii four years ago, it took a force of nature to bring them together. “I was on the hotel lanai, at the Four Seasons Lanai, when this sudden, terrible storm broke,” Jessica said. “I was there on a bachelorette with a bunch of college girlfriends. We ran into the main bar and, I wouldn’t say I caught the eye of Jayce, as much as I caught my foot on his.”

The pair tumbled to the polished teak flooring and erupted in laughter as the tropical rains began to fall. “I guess you could say we—literally—fell in love that day,” Jayce said.

Only one minor problem, Jayce was there on his honeymoon with his own college sweetheart.

“When we checked out, I left my phone number at the front desk concierge with a fifty if he would give it to her,” he said. “Fast forward a couple months, I was back in Chicago in a marriage that was already falling apart, and she was in Southern California living the dream. We started texting and...”

Jayce was an account manager for a small liquor distribution company his uncle owned and they were expanding into Orange County about the same time his divorce was finalized. “I remember sending her the text I was moving,” Jayce said. “I didn’t hear back for two days and thought, well, my luck has finally run out.”

Quite the contrary. Jessica had looked Jayce up online and knew about his family’s company. At the same time, she was a VP at her family’s much larger wine and spirits distribution company. They were looking to expand into the Midwest, and a plan was being hatched to acquire Jayce’s family’s company.

“He had no idea this was going on, but it turns out, the merger went through without a hitch, and then we got hitched,” Jessica said.

Three years to the weekend of their first run-in, the couple was married on the same property in Lanai, with the same cast of characters in attendance, minus Jayce’s first wife. A big tropical storm even showed up for them at the reception, forcing the dancing and revelry to continue indoors “I guess sometimes, you just get lucky,” Jessica said, “And sometimes, lightning does strike twice.”

Dating during school was never a priority for Phoebe Weil. The 27-year-old has always been business first. As one of the youngest CFOs of a Fortune 100 company in history, Weil grew up wanting to inject sense into the dollars side of her family’s immense property holdings company.

With large-scale residential projects simultaneously going in Colorado, Oregon, Washington, New Mexico, Utah, and Vancouver, Canada, she hasn’t slowed down a bit since taking her post straight out of school. “We build condominiums in cities in the West that used to play second-fiddle to the big metros,” she said. “Now that people have been priced out of the LAs, the SFs, and the Seattles—they look at some of the smaller

cities and find out, there’s much more happening.”

Clad in a Patagonia fleece vest and a pair of flat-front khakis and ruby red Danskos, Weil, who has homes in Boulder, Bend, and Bozeman (“I call them the killer Bs”) received her MBA last spring from Duke’s Fuqua School of Business with an emphasis on property management. “In school a lot of people thought, ‘oh, you want to own a little building and collect rent—that’s cute,’” she said, “And it’s like, then I show them the two billion dollar project we have going in Boise and they say, ‘What’s that?’ And I say, ‘That’s just one of my babies’.”

Babies seem to be on the brain for Weil, and for good reason. She and her partner, Samantha Stoll recently found out they are expecting. The pair met at Weil’s first week at work. Stoll was her administrative assistant. “I know it sounds strange, but I had a crush on her the moment I walked in the door. But, you know, I’d watched enough Mad Men to know not to be too harrassy.”

So, how did Weil figure it out? “I went with what I learned my first week at Duke, go with your strength, and let the rest take care of itself.”

Weil immediately booked a five-city trip for the pair. The days were filled with meetings and site visits. “But the second or third night we were up all night talking,” Weil said. “By the end of the trip, we were, well—let’s just say we became close.”

With the help of a sperm donor relative of Stoll’s and one of Weil’s eggs, Stoll just recently started her third trimester with their baby boy. When asked where they’re going to raise him, Weil flashes a brief smile. “He’ll travel with us and be in on every project,” she said. “After all, it’s in his blood.”