Spring Wedding Guide 2003 by Sun Journal

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20 Spring Bridal Guide

Lewiston, Maine, Sunday, January 19, 2003

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Not everyone’s a size eight: Tips for the full-figured bride

(ARA) – One of the hardest tasks for any bride is finding the right dress. There are so many options: short sleeves or long, beaded or plain, white or off-white, detachable train or just plain full length. Most women spend hours combing through all the bridal magazines they can get their hands on comparing styles and fabrics. But when it comes time to start visiting bridal shops and trying on gowns, many plussized brides find the selection to be disappointing. “Most shops only carry sizes up to 12 or 14, and a lot of brides-to-be are embarrassed to go in and look at dresses,” says Chris Sconzo, owner of PlusSizeBridal.com.

Noticing that the plus-sized dresses were flying off the racks of his family’s bridal store, Sconzo decided there was a need for a service specializing in hard-to-find sizes. His Web site is the first onlinebridal store catering exclusively to the plus-sized bride. Here are some tips from PlusSizeBridal.com on how to select the perfect dress:  Set a budget right away. Decide how much you can afford to spend. This will help you avoid the wasted time and frustration of looking at gowns that are out of your price range.  Allow plenty of time. It’s a big decision, and you don’t want to have to rush into any-

cal in saving time and money. For more information visit ww.plussizebridal.com or call (866) PLS-BRID. Using the size charts provided, customers can shop for a wide selection of

gowns and accessories. Most items can be shipped within three days, and any gown can be returned within five days if the customer is not satisfied.

thing. You also want to leave enough time for any needed alterations.  Find your style. At first all of the options will be overwhelming. But if you narrow your search down to styles that look flattering on you, and emphasize your best attributes, you will find the right dress more easily.  Use the size charts. All wedding gowns are sized differently according to the manufacturer. Most women think that if they wear a size 14 in ready-to-wear, they are a 14 in bridal. Not the case. In fact, bridal gowns are actually smaller. A size 14 in ready-towear usually is a size or two more in bridal attire. Using the size chart for the specific dress you are ordering is criti-

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Lewiston, Maine, Sunday, January 19, 2003

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Locales continued from page 3 because it only requires a few days residency,” advises Crous. Since England’s and Ireland’s waiting periods are much longer, brides frequently have a quick wedding at home followed by an upper crust version in Britain. At Inverlochy Castle, a truly grand castle in the Scottish Highlands, weddings are a specialty, averaging about 40-50 people with a stay of two to three nights. When Queen Victoria visited there, she commented, “I never saw a lovelier or more romantic spot.” An on-site wedding coordinator, Abigail Leonard, handles all the details and can be e-mailed at wedding s(@inverlochycastlehotel.com. There’s no upper limit to what a wedding can cost, but one for only the bride and groom can start at 650 pounds (approximately $1,000). Over in Italy, villas and castles are favorites of the Italians themselves. To make it easy for Americans, a couple of Web sites offer photos and coordinators. Information about “Castle 103,” near Florence, a grand affair complete with crenellated towers, and “Castle 105,” built in the 13th century, is available at http://www.weddings-in-italy.com. At http:// www.italyweddings.com, find details about “Villa No. 1,” a renaissance villa near Florence. Hawaii is a perennial favorite for weddings, and there are numerous Web sites for guidance on hosting weddings everywhere from public beaches (free) to larger resorts. At http:

//www.hawaiiwedding.com, the of Our Lady of the Angels, where Wikapu Country Club, a property weddings are held five different originally designed for Marilyn times on Saturdays. Monroe by Frank Lloyd Wright, is New York’s Cathedral of St. popular for weddings. John the Divine, the largest caFour Seasons resorts are thedral in the world, draws on known for elegant settings, easGothic and Romanesque archiily viewed on their Website, http: tecture for spectacular settings. //www.fourseasons.com. Wedding In 1998, Uma Thurman and Ethan packages including accommodaHawke married here in a formal tions at Four Seasons Maui can 6 p.m. ceremony. start in the several thousands. Dallas Fuentes, pastoral events The Regent Chiang Mai Resort coordinator, says, “Most people and Spa, nestled in Thailand’s Mae who marry here have come to the Rim Valley, offers a “Lanna” style cathedral for a concert or other wedding package that includes two event and been so wowed by the days of spa treatments, flowers, space, that they want to marry procession and traditional blesshere.” ings by village elders for approxiSpace costs range from OCEANS OF SCENERY — Heidi mately $1,500, plus taxes. Accom$500 for the smallest chapel Kristen Whitlock frolics along the to $1,500 for the largest open modations are priced separately. beach near the site of her wedding area in the cathedral (http:// E-mail res.chiangmai@fourseaso to Jamey Whitlock at the Four ns.com. www.stjohndivine.org). Seasons Resort in Maui, Hawaii. Some travel agencies like AbsoJust outside New York City Beachfronts in the islands offer lute Asia in New York City (http: several locations have a royal //www.absoluteasia.com) can indi- naturally spectacular backdrops for feeling. outdoor weddings. (AP Photo/Four vidualize trips to include wedding Abigail Kirsch, a popular Seasons Resorts) arrangements. Even the beautiful regional caterer (http:// Shinto shrine In Tokyo, the Meiji www.abigailkirsch.com), points Jingu, hosts weddings at a cost of approximately couples to a variety of settings, including the Castle $1,200 (http://www.meijijingu.or.jp/english). at Tarrytown, a 31-room Relais & Chateaux hotel Closer to home, large cathedrals do quite nicely for with stone walls and gilded mirrors, and Tappan Hill, many couples. Los Angeles has its modern Cathedral a grand mansion overlooking the Hudson River.

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Spring Bridal Guide 3

Lewiston, Maine, Sunday, January 19, 2003

Different locales appeal to many couples By MARY MARTIN NIEPOLD Most brides dream of standing in a beautiful gown in a perfect setting, but increasing numbers want that setting to look downright royal. There’s a definite trend for more stately gowns — longer trains, classic silhouettes — recent favorites of designers like Vera Wang and Carolina Hererra. Then there’s the trend for royal settings to set off that gown, thanks to a recent rush of celebrity weddings in castles. Castles in the United Kingdom and Ireland are particularly luring. According to Yolanda Crous, travel editor of Bride’s Magazine, credit goes to the knot-tying of Madonna and Guy Ritchie at Skibo Castle in Scotland, of Paul McCartney and Heather Mills in Castle Leslie in Ireland and the reception of Pierce Brosnan, also in Ireland, at Ashford Castle. “Castle weddings are hot,” says Crous. “It’s the ultimate in exotic, and plays into America’s obsession with royalty.” These weddings typify an emerging trend called “destination weddings,” where the entire wedding party travels to the chosen location. Millie Martini Bratten, editor-inchief at Bride’s, explains: “Everybody’s taking a trip, but doing it together to a place that has special meaning. And since the weddings are frequently smaller, usually they are less expensive than hosting a large group closer to home.” A destination wedding party averages about 50 people versus several hundred. The yen for royal-style weddings can come to life on any continent in the world. While many Americans are particularly fond of their Anglo roots, an exotic temple in Japan, a lush resort in Thailand, an ocean-side garden in Hawaii, or a 13th century villa in Tuscany can seem equally royal. A bride and groom should simply let their imagination – plus careful planning and an adequate budget – be their guide when choosing a destination. A recent survey by

Conde Nast Bridal Infobank showed that 46 percent of all honeymooners stay at a resort and that 8 percent of couples hold a destination wedding. The best way to arrange for a foreign wedding is to contact a country’s tourism board, the wedding coordinator at an individual hotel-resort, or hire a wedding coordinator who specializes in foreign weddings. The Association of Bridal Consultants (http:// www.bridalassn.com) has consultants in 28 countries and can steer you to a specialist. In fact, the Web is an excellent way to browse the world, display your options and get

most of the information you might need. Guidance on destination weddings, various locations, local vendors and local requirements can be found on sites like http: //www.weddingchannel.com and http:// www.modernbride.com. General requirements of marriages abroad are found on the government’s Web site, http://www.state.gov/travel. For true castle settings, you can’t do much better than England, Ireland and Scotland. “Scotland is the easiest place for Americans to get married, Continued on page 18

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GRAND PLACE FOR A WEDDING — Skibo Castle, near Dornoch, Scotland, was the venue for the 2000 wedding of entertainer Madonna to movie director Guy Ritchie. Castles, cathedrals and other grand or exotic sites are available to couples who want something beyond a local club or hotel wedding. (AP Photo/PA)

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Gifts can be beautiful, useful

lmost anything inch vase ($149), and a 2- by beautiful or 3-inch frame ($59). useful is appro• A timely and timeless priate for a wedding gift, gift might be the Yvette but considering the event, mantel clock ($499) from concentrate on beauty: Howard Miller. The • Best known for her Windsor cherry case has sleek wedding gowns, fluted sides and classical Vera Wang reaches into the pediment and base, and the apres-wedding sphere with face has Roman numerals her new designs for Wedgframed in a cast floral dewood fine bone china and sign. Despite its traditional crystal. Like the dresses style, it runs on quartz, has she creates, the patterns a dual chime movement are classically simple and that plays either Westminsophisticated: Golden Grosster or Ave Maria chimes, grain ($109 for a 5-piece volume control, and auplace setting) is white, tomatic nighttime chime adorned with gold trims shut-off option. that hint at the picot edging • Swans mate for life, and on ribbon; Golden Tiara their forms often symbolize LASTING THROUGH TIME — The ($139 for a 5-piece place setYvette chiming mantel clock from marriage. “Endless Love” ting) is champagne-colored Howard Miller will cue the couple is the title of a bone china china with a rich banding figurine tableaux of two through a long married life. (AP in matte gold. Her crystal white swans ($135) from Photo/Howard Miller) designs include Cube LightRoyal Doulton. Designed ing, forms in sculptured by Alan Maslankowski, the blocks rendered as 2-, 6-, and 9-inch candlesticks piece is 5 inches by 13 1/4 inches. ($25, $55 and $75) or as votives in clear or frosted • Among the gift treasures at Fortunoff are finishes ($40 each). crystal objects with sculptured heart motifs, • “Widdean,” an Old English word meaning all from the Wedding Promises Collection by “to pledge,” is the source of the word “wedLenox. The hearts can be found cornering on ding.” It’s also the inspiration for Waterford the 5- by 7-inch photo-invitation frame ($79.99), Crystal’s Wedding Heirloom Collection, reinalong the stems of a pair of toasting flutes terpreting the classic symbols of the heart and ($39.99), or around the sides of a 6 3/4-inch bowl the fleur-de-lis. There’s a 6-inch bowl ($110), a 7($24.99). (AP)

Personalizing your ceremony More and more couples are composing their own, or a portion of their own, ceremony. There are a number of ways you and your fiancé can add that personal, creative touch to your wedding. Beverly Clark’s book “Planning A Wedding To Remember” offers these suggestions for a creative ceremony:

 Discuss with your officiant which portion, if any, of the traditional wording may be changed.  Rather than have your back to the guests, change places with the officiant and face your guests.  At a small, intimate ceremony, have the guests join you at the altar or have them join hands encircling you.  Include both sets of parents in the processional.  Have the groom meet you halfway down the aisle.  The bride can part from her father by kissing him on the cheek when they reach his seat, then walk alone to meet the groom.

 Have the officiant ask “Who blesses this union?” or “Who blesses this marriage?” Have both sets of parents or all the guests join in saying, “We do.”

 Some brides and grooms are each writing his or her own vows, therefore making the vows different from one another. They may even choose to keep these promises secret until the wedding day.  Involve children from previous marriages by acknowledging them in the ceremony through special readings, prayers or the presentation of the “Family Medallion.”  The vows themselves should only take two or three minutes to repeat or recite to one another. Additional thoughts on your commitment to marriage may be expressed in the main body of the ceremony or through the use of special poems and prayers.  Have a favorite piece of music played or sung as you go down the aisle, something other than the traditional wedding march. Music meaningful to the two of you could also be sung or played during the ceremony or as you leave. But check with your church or synagogue as to any music restrictions they might have.  Write your own poem or prayer and read it, or have quota-

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tions from a favorite poem or prayer read by the officiant or a family member.  You may want to print a program to be given to all the guests as they enter. It could include the names of your attendants and who they are or how you met them, a special poem or prayer or your wedding vows. Such a program gives a nice personal touch, especially to a large ceremony, and serves as a remembrance to take home.  Depending on your budget and the number of people, a single rose could be handed to every guest, or a candle for the guest to light during an evening ceremony.  If you are not too nervous, you can stop at the end of the aisle, take a single rose from your bouquet and hand it to your mother. Then take another and hand it to his mother. Keep this move as a little surprise for them.  Incorporate symbolism in some way by carrying a family Bible, handkerchief or fan that was carried by your or the groom’s mother.  In a church wedding, you can find out about having the church bells rung after you say your vows.  There are creative alternatives to throwing rice. Since rice can cause harm to the birds who may eat it, consider having birdseed thrown instead of the traditional rice. Dried rose petals, white confetti or streamers (in biodegradable material) are affordable alternatives. Or add some fun by having guests blow bubbles as the newlyweds leave the church. Sparklers (when carefully used and discarded) can be spectacular for an evening wedding.

Spring Bridal Guide 17

Lewiston, Maine, Sunday, January 19, 2003

ome bridal couples may be the lucky recipients of jewelry that has been in their families for generations. Others will be making new selections they hope their future grandchildren may one day wear: —Because they’re worn every day for life, platinum settings should be the choice for bridal jewelry, says designer Scott Kay. Platinum prongs in an engagement ring are stronger than gold, he says, giving the diamond or other stone a more secure anchor. He offers classic prong rings, which let diamonds shine with maximum sparkle; one variation is his cathedral setting design, with rising slopes on either side of the main stone, giving it more protection from abrasion; one version ($4,000) has four smaller diamonds set in the slope. Also in his Vintage Collection are platinum bands for the groom in a variety of textures, widths, and finishes, such as the one with rope design ($2,400). —Pearls have been associated with weddings since ancient times, and cultured pearls show up on 62 percent of all American brides, according to the Jewelry Information Center, an industry group. The bride can choose color if she wants, because South Sea pearls can be found in a variety of hues and tinges, such as gray, green and gold. Freshwater pearls are likely to come from China, where they are found in profusion, and are a good choice for those on a budget. The classic button earrings or necklaces may be akoya pearls from Japan, famed for their near-perfect roundness. —Heart shapes are the ultimate romantic token. But this cut in diamonds has always been prohibitively expensive and rare, owing to so few rough stones being appropriate. The new Lady Heart Collection by David Arabov & Sons comes up with clever, affordable variation: a diamond heart fashioned from a princess, or square-cut diamond, combined with two modified step-cut half moon stones. Choose from .25 carat to 3 carats total weight – hand set in 18K white gold settings for rings, earrings, pendants,

Heirloom jewelry past and future

DIAMONDS ALL AROUND — A cathedral-style platinum engagement band from Scott Kay includes a slope of four smaller diamonds on each side of the main stone. (AP Photo/Scott Kay) line bracelets and necklaces. Typical prices are $1,000 for a .35 carat total weight diamond pendant and $3,500 for a 1 carat diamond pendant – significantly lower than traditional

heart-shaped diamonds, the firm says. —All that’s gold may not glitter. The textured gold (starting at $500) or sterling silver (starting at $200) wedding bands in the Twig Collection by K. Brunini are inspired by twigs, vertebrae and DNA – all part of the Symbols of Strength Series. Many of these are accented with diamonds, gemstones and pearls and are a good choice for couples who want low-key jewelry. —The all-time classic is the engagement diamond, and first-time buyers should be paying attention to the drill about the “4Cs” – namely cut, color, clarity and carat. These are the basics of picking a quality stone, but there are other considerations, such as shapes (round, teardrop, heart, marquise) and special styles. All this information can be found at http://www.adiamon disforever.com, the Web site of the De Beers information arm, the Diamond Information

CAPTURE HER HEART — A diamond pendant from Lady Heart is an ingenious combination of one squarecut diamond and two step-cut half moon stones, making them much more affordable than the rare whole diamonds that can be cut into this shape. (AP Photo/David Arabov & Sons)

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Center. Some of the cuts to look for include the Leo Diamond, with brilliant 66-facet cuts, developed by Leo Schacter of the World’s Diamondaires. Call 1 (800) 431-4393 for information. Another is t the Royal Asscher cut from Fabrikant, with a high crown setting, steep pavilion, and 74 facets. Find retailers by calling 1 (800) 4328895. The Rand Diamond from Codiam comes with a provenance report which tracks the stone from mine to the cutting factory to the consumer. Call 1 (800) 223-6279 for information. The Elara cut, named after the brightest moon of the planet Jupiter, has square-cut faceting and proportions of a round brilliant. Call 1 (888) 3977627 for information. The Zales Diamond, the jewelry marketer’s signature octillion cut, has 82 facets and symmetrical arrangment for maximum light distribution. For information, log on to http://www.zales.com. (AP)

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Lewiston, Maine, Sunday, January 19, 2003 2. Lose your passport? (Keep it in your inside pocket or carry-on luggage.) If you’re overseas and you loose the passport, contact the nearest American Embassy for replacement. It can cost $75-100 for replacement. 3. Air-Fair. You confirmed the flight at least 72 hours before departure, but you were bumped (not due to weather). The airline is still required to get you to your destination and provide you overnight accommodations and meals while you wait. 4. Hotel Mess -Ups: If you arrive late only to find your reservations have been cancelled, don’t let the hotel force

you into an inferior room. Insist on seeing other rooms until you find the right one. If nothing appeals to you, you can agree to take a less favorable room, at a reduced rate, and try again the next day. If the hotel is overbooked, you can ask where you can find accommodations elsewhere. Call your travel agent with problems. They should be able to find you another room,and handle refunds for you. 5. Lost luggage. Most airlines locate lost luggage within a day. Notify the airline baggage claims department if your luggage doesn’t arrive with you. You can ask for a toiletry bag at the airport, and

Tuxedo rental tips One of the most daunting tasks of a man’s life can be choosing the perfect tuxedo for that special occasion. While many may try to go it along, most are happiest when they get a little help from the experts. The Black Tie Bureau of the International Formalwear Association, acknowledged leaders in the tuxedo trade, offer a few hints to help ensure that

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once they locate your bags, they should deliver them to your hotel. 6. Your Rings: You should make sure you insure your engagement ring and wedding rings when you buy them. For an outdoor honeymoon, you may want to leave them in the hotel safe deposit box.Leaving them in the room could get them stolen, and wouldn’t it be great if you went snorkeling and lost them in the briny blue because they slipped off?

One more tip:

• Put essentials in your carry on bag . Travelers checks and cash should be kept close; keep your return tickets with you, not in your suitcase. you choose the style you want, but however you make your decision, remember it’s your time to shine, too! Dare to be Different - Accessorize: Tuxedos can be dressed up with creative use o accessories, such as a colorful print vest or fancifully patterned bow tie and cummerbund. Even an inexpensive pocket square can go a long way toward helping you express your individuality. So go ahead and break all the rules. All, that is, but one - patent leather formal shoes are an essential. Rent a pair if you don’t own them. Coordinate with Your Date: It’s important not to color clash with your date, so be sure to find out what she’ll be wearing and plan to complement her ensemble while defining your own style. The Early Bird Catches the Choice Tux: Since so many men are now renting tuxedos, early planning and shopping helps make sure you will get the style you want. Financial Planning Helps: Most stores will require a deposit, so plan your budget accordingly. Actual rental prices will vary according to your selection, but expect to spend between $50 and $100. Hint: If you pay for your rental in advance, you can avoid nerve-wracking delays on the special day. Check Yourself Out: Before you get in the car, look in the mirror to make sure all the details are working for you. Straighten that tie, smooth that collar and enjoy. — Courtesy of International Formalwear Association

Spring Bridal Guide 5

Lewiston, Maine, Sunday, January 19, 2003

Help for the groom, best man and groomsmen Traditionally, women have done all the wedding planning. Crusty adages like “the groom just shows up,” have long been conventional wisdom. However, as more couples plan their weddings together, grooms are playing a more active role. “Contrary to popular belief, planning a wedding is a difficult task for the groom,” says Mark Walerstein, founder of GroomsOnline (www.grooms online.com), an informational Web site offering tips, pointers and timesaving hints designed to make the planning process more fun, relaxing and rewarding for the man. “The groom does have responsibilities, but we really are in the dark about what to do.” Featuring wedding day checklists, attire pointers and more, the site sheds light on just about every aspect of the wedding, from buying a tuxedo to organizing a bachelor party. There’s even a full-service online gift shop for the gifts you need for the groomsmen, best man, ring bearer and bridesmaids too. Got friends or family who are sports fans? Order a personalized Louisville Slugger or Rawlings bats. Or get creative with a framed photo flashing a name and message on a favorite team’s electronic scoreboard. Visit www.groomsonline-gifts for more ideas. As you plan your upcoming nuptials, here are a few tips to keep in mind, courtesy of GroomsOnline.

sure to find out whether there is a caterer on-site or if you need to provide one, as this can have a major impact on your wedding budget. Also ask about alcohol pricing, menu planning and food service options.

 Throwing a bachelor party -Traditional bachelor parties have included cigars, playing cards and plenty of drinking. However, an increasing number of grooms are interested in more memorable and fun options. Today’s bachelor parties can be anything from sporting events to a skiing or camping trip with friends.  Choosing the first dance - This is the big one, that all-important first dance as husband and wife. Do you have two left feet? You also might consider dance lessons so you can dance like a pro from start to finish. Pick something that’s sentimental to both the bride and groom. If you’re still stumped, choose a classic tune from artists like Frank Sinatra or Nat King Cole.  Giving the toast - The keys to a good toast are tailoring your material to your audience; speaking with confidence; and keeping good eye contact and body language.

Tips for newlyweds buying their first car together

(ARA) - If men are from Mars and women are from Venus, how can they come together to buy a car? With some men preferring sports bars to intimate restaurants, while their partners opt for “chick flicks” over “Die Another Day,” it isn’t difficult to see how men and women can be orbiting in different directions when it comes to car selection. “Men and women look at cars in totally different ways,” says John Davis, host and executive producer of MotorWeek, the award-winning PBS weekly automotive magazine show. “Women tend to consider the practical aspects of a car, while men are inclined to think of a vehicle as an extension of their personalities.” When women shop for cars they look at things such as maneuverability and step-in height, how sharp the door edges are and the texture of the seat fabric. “Women want to know how convenient a door will be for loading groceries or kids, and how easy it is to get into the back seat and quell a riot,” says Davis. Even small

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 Finding a disc jockey - Wedding magazines, the yellow pages and of course, wordof-mouth referrals from family or friends are all great ways to find a DJ for your wedding. Set up a meeting with him or her before you make your decision to be sure that person is the best match for what you and your fiancée have in mind and there are no surprises. It’s good to have an idea of what you’re looking for when calling around. Don’t forget to ask for references from previous clients.

details such as whether a driver can operate small control buttons with long fingernails are an issue for many women consumers. Men, on the other hand, want to know how a car will drive, what options are available and how well a vehicle’s image reflects their own. Theirs is a more emotional, gut-level decision. So how can people with such different perspectives come together to make a purchase that pleases both? Davis suggests some ways for couples to successfully navigate the carbuying process. • First, have a good idea of what you both want before you go in to talk to a dealer. Take time to discuss what’s important to each of you and decide together what features are necessary and fit your price range. If you have a local auto show, visit it and try out all

the prospects to narrow your search. • Let the salesperson sell you. Ask a lot of questions. “They should work to sell you,” says Davis. • If there is any disagreement, excuse yourselves to talk privately. One person may not recognize the risk of a higher price, or may really want the extended warranty. These are topics that may not come up until you are working with the salesperson. Davis advises couples: “Don’t discuss it in public; go home and work it out.” • Anything they give you to sign, make sure the numbers add up. This is where couples can help each other. In many cases, women are the ones who read the small print, while men tend to dwell on big picture items like warranties and service requirements. • Be patient. Make sure you have talked over any concerns and that all of your questions have been answered. Allow time for both of you to test drive the vehicle. Davis recommends visiting dealers during the week, when salespeople are less busy and can give you their full attention.

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Spring Bridal Guide

Lewiston, Maine, Sunday, January 19, 2003

Black Magenta Yellow Cyan

Ordering flowers without a botany degree Simple ideas for creative Every day, there’s a customer from a centerpiece. Consider who picks up the phone, calls giving the florist your own vase a florist ... and gets completely or container. tongue-tied. It’s not due to a • When giving flowers or Many couples want their flowers phobia of phones, flowers or floordering for yourself, ask for to be more than just beautiful. If rists — it’s a communications specific colors or color themes: you want your flowers to have barrier. Most consumers aren’t pastels, bright and bold, all special meaning, consult the familiar with the names of the white, etc. following list: wide range of flowers available. Special occasions By following some simple mean special attention azalea - temperance tips, consumers can order flowPeople often equate special ocbluebell - constancy ers with confidence and without casions, such as weddings, with white camellia surprises. The American Floral flowers. Some tips on working perfect loveliness Marketing Council (AFMC), an with your florist on weddings carnation - pure, deep love industry-promotion board dediinclude: red chrysanthemum - I love you cated to reminding consumers • Before contacting your floclematis - mental beauty about the role of flowers in our rist, select the date, time and daffodil - regard, chivalry everyday lives, offers some place for your wedding and white daisy - innocence advice. reception, and know your colforget-me-not - true love “Florists make things easy. ors and styles of gowns. Then, honeysuckle - affection We take phone orders. We make arrange a preliminary meeting. ivy - fidelity and friendship each arrangement individually. Discuss your general design lilac - first emotion of love We deliver. And we know that ideas and begin to develop a white lily - purity we’re usually delivering more budget that will meet your lily of the valley than flowers-we’re delivering needs. return of happiness feelings. So we want the flowers • As you get closer to the date, nasturtium - patriotism to be just what you wanted,” meet again with the florist to orange blossom - bridal festivities said Charles F. Kremp III, flocomplete the details. The florist phlox - unanimity rist and AFMC chairman. should have specific suggesred rose - love Two dramatics and tions that fit both your taste and white rose - worthiness one traditional, please budget. rosemary - remembrance One arrangement is for a • If the florist has never stock - lasting beauty grandmother who loves gardenworked at your ceremony or sweet pea - lasting pleasure ing; the other is a centerpiece reception site, make sure she or tuberose - dangerous pleasures for an elegant dinner party. he visits the location. tulip - hopeless love How to communicate the differ• Consult selection guides for violet - modesty, faithfulness ence? Use these tips when workideas. Your florist has bridal ing with your florist: books to offer guidelines for colors, flowers, • When ordering floral gifts, describe the styles, designs and flower varieties. recipient’s personality type-romantic, artistic, § If you have any unusual or personal requests, outdoorsy, traditional or dramatic, for example. don’t hesitate to ask! Sketch ideas, cut out picThe florist can match the arrangement with the tures or take photographs of flowers and share personality-and the recipient will really respond them with your florist. By communicating with to the gift. your florist, you can be confident that your wed• If the flowers are for interiors or entertaining, ding flowers will be just what you hoped for. describe where the arrangement will be placed. Information provided by Society of American An arrangement for a mantel will be different Florists

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wedding favors Your guests celebrated your special day with you - a gift in and of itself. A traditional way to show your gratitude is with a wedding favor. Ornate or simply made and elegant, these small gifts invariably send a big message, expressing appreciation for your guests’ participation in the wedding. They also serve as mementos of this special day. The ideas for favors are endless, but here are a few to get you started. You can spend a lot or a little money . • Go seasonal. Give a gift in the spirit of the season. For February, do Valentine’s chocolates, sunscreen or beach balls for summer affairs, or plastic pumpkins filled with candy corn for autumn weddings. • Create a keepsake. No one wants a favor that will just create clutter. So give guests something they’ll use - try a picture frame, key chain, fragrance or music box. • Just eat it. Who can resist a favor that’s edible. Try a miniature box of good chocolate, gourmet jelly beans or mixed nuts in small canisters. For personalization, attach an embossed ribbon or label with your name and wedding date. • Donate to charity. Make a donation to your favorite organization in honor of your marriage. Print up a card or note to tell guests about your good deed. • Give a tasty beverage. A small bottle of wine or abeer from a microbrewery with a ribbon or label noting your name and wedding date will help guests remember you

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as they guzzle your gift. You can add onto the favor by supplying them with beer mugs or wine glasses engraved in silver or black ink with your names and wedding date. • Watch it bloom. Small plants or tree saplings potted in antique or pretty pots are sure to last long after your wedding day. Other ideas are flower bulbs, packets of seeds, a single rose or a flower lei at each place setting. Your florist can also design centerpieces that break apart so each guest can take home a flower bouquet or small plant. Or, give boutonnieres and corsages to each guest. • Enliven the senses. Entice your guests senses with potpourri in a bag or small vials of perfume or cologne. Or try scented candles or miniature scented soaps. • Write it down. Blank books, journals or notepads in your wedding colors will let your guests record memories of your big day. Or give small plastic calendars or rip-offthe-date ones. You can add on pens, pencils or markers. • Go sporty. Personalized tennis or golf balls will appeal to sports fans. Or try baseball caps or visors.

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Spring Bridal Guide 15

Lewiston, Maine, Sunday, January 19, 2003

Cultures,

continued from page 14

culture,” Coffee explained. The menu, which was written in English and Norwegian, included chicken anglaise, sirloin of beef, roasted turkey and stuffing and assorted salads and vegetables. Norwegian cheese and chocolates also were served. Norwegian traditions at the reception included passing around a rolling pin during dinner for guests to sign as a keepsake for the couple. They also had a “toastmaster,” someone who coordinates the dozens of speeches given during dinner at Norwegian wedding receptions. Coffee, who received help from one of the groomsmen, gave a speech, partly in Norwegian, to her new husband. The gesture moved many in the crowd to tears. “It was the most unique and beautiful wedding I have ever seen,” said Nekeisha Williams, Coffee’s maid of honor. “At Melanie and Jorgen’s wedding, we were able to see more than just two people getting married, we witnessed the union of two cultures, two languages, two traditions and one love.” Fran Coffee said she’s always liked how Jorgen treats her daughter like a “princess.” She said she knew early on that their relationship might be something special by the way Melanie looked and sounded when she talked about Hesselberg. “I believe that Melanie and Jorgen have laid a good foundation for a wonderful relationship together,” Fran Coffee said. Coffee used a wedding coordinator for planning most of her wedding and reception. She got a few floral ideas from a Martha Stewart magazine, but she and Hesselberg came up with most of the decorating ideas themselves to add that special touch. The bride made the wedding programs herself using her home computer. Details about

the wedding were posted on their wedding Web site – http: //www.Hesselberg.org. The newlyweds have just a couple of disappointments about planning their special day. One was their choice of disk jockey for the reception. They had labored to compile a song list that would cater to both cultures, only for the DJ to venture from the list midway through the reception. Another was the faux pas on the printed directions to the church, causing some guests to be late. “I should have proofread the directions better,” Coffee admits. On their wedding night, the couple stayed in a suite at a hotel along Michigan Avenue. And on their way to the hotel, they passed a gazebo on the Magnificent Mile. “So naturally we got out and danced,” Coffee said.

Care to share?

The Sun Journal is looking for interesting and unusual weddings to feature on the pages of our bridal guides. If you’ve planning something unique, if you’ve selected an unusual locale or if you’ve got a special theme, please let us know! Or, if you’ve been invited to one of these weddings, we sure would like to hear from you. Contact: Linda Galway Special Sections Editor 207-784-7045 or 1-800-482-0759, ext. 1297 email: lgalway@sunjournal.com snail mail: Linda Galway c/o Sun Journal PO Box 4400 Lewiston, ME 04243-4400.

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About the wedding cake By Beverly Clark Several tiers of torte or simply frosted white? Cakes come in all shapes, sizes and tastes. Look for one you’ll enjoy eating as well as viewing. • Start interviewing wedding cake bakers about three to four months in advance. • Look though the bridal magazines for pictures of cakes you like; take these with you when interviewing bakers. • Ask to see photographs of wedding cakes they have created for other weddings. • Ask if you can have a sample taste. Some bakers set aside a specific time or day of the week when samples of all their flavors are available for tasting. • If you’re planning a garden wedding, especially during the hottest part of summer, let your baker know. Some types of cakes and frostings hold up better than others in the heat. • Discuss final details such as size, flavor of the frosting, decoration and set up. • If fresh flowers are to be used on the cake, have your baker coordinate the details with your florist. • Get a contract specifying the delivery date, time and place, the size, shape, flavor, any extras, total cost and the amount of your deposit. Source: The Beverly Clark Collection, 1120 Mark Avenue, Carpinteria, CA 93013.

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14 Spring Bridal Guide

Lewiston, Maine, Sunday, January 19, 2003

Cultures, Black Magenta Yellow Cyan

continued from page 9

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“We were all so proud and happy.” Coffee, 25, of Manhattan, Kan., is a black American, and Hesselberg is Norwegian. It was important to them to incorporate both cultures in the celebration. “We felt it was our day and we could write the rules, so we did,” Coffee said. About 120 people attended the wedding, which was held at a historic black American church in suburban Chicago and officiated by the Rev. Tony Cobbins of Canaan Baptist Church in Kansas City. The couple recited traditional wedding vows. Hesselberg’s mother, Gry, gave away her son, which is a

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ding is a long-held AfricanAmerican tradition. Nearly 30 Norwegians attended the wedding. For many of them, it was their first trip to America. The wedding colors were navy blue and cream. “We chose those colors for several reasons,” Coffee said. “It was navy blue because Jorgen likes blue, and cream because white roses have a special meaning to us.” Also, Hesselberg wore his traditional Norwegian garb – a “bunad,” which happened to be navy blue and cream. Norwegians wear bunads to special celebrations, such as weddings. They also don them to celebrate their Independence Day and at holiday parties. Bunads are handmade, and their intricate design

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dates back to the 19th century. Hesselberg’s bunad has pants that end just below his knees, white socks that cover his calves, a navy blue pinstriped vest and a cream 3/4length topcoat. “I always say he looks like a Norwegian prince in it,” Coffee gushed. All of the groomsmen wore bunads, and all of the Norwegian guests who had bunads were asked to wear them at the wedding. The bunads were in various colors. Even Coffee’s nephew, who is American, wore a bunad as a junior groomsman. Coffee, who estimates she tried on more than 50 dresses over several months of shopping, settled on an ivory satin dress with a princess cut and beaded spaghetti straps. The embroidery and beads on the bodice combined to make a subtle floral print, and that design was duplicated along the trim of the dress. “I never imagined myself in one of those,” Coffee said of the cathedral veil. “but I tried it on a whim at the store and fell in love with the fairytale-like appearance.” She also wore a tiara. At a country club reception, each place card on the tables was decorated with a miniature three-dimensional satin rose made by Coffee and Hesselberg. Seating was arranged by named tables rather than by numbers. The names – seven each American and Norwegian – reflected important symbols in these cultures. American names included Old Glory, Martin Luther King, Jr., Mount Rushmore and Apple Pie. Norwegian names were Lutefisk, a traditional Norwegian meal eaten during the Christmas season; Slalom, because skiing was invented in Norway; Syttende Mai, which is Norwegian for the 17th of May, Norwegian Independence Day; and Edvard Munch, the Norwegian artist who painted “The Scream.” “We made the table signs with navy blue bows tied on them and we made little cards to sit on the tables that had the definition of the table name so that people would come away from our wedding knowing a little bit more about the other continued on page 15

Spring Bridal Guide 7

Lewiston, Maine, Sunday, January 19, 2003

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Spring Bridal Guide

Lewiston, Maine, Sunday, January 19, 2003

Black Magenta Yellow Cyan

Continued from page 12

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Spring Bridal Guide 13

Lewiston, Maine, Sunday, January 19, 2003

was cool with lots of rain and many overcast days, but my garden was green and full of blooms for July 31. I had not only the lilies and other plants I had specifically planted but also, because we didn’t have the heat, many of the summer flowers were still in full bloom and looking lovely. The grass in Ireland was no greener than that here on the hill in Turner. We had rehearsal dinner here the night before, and the tables were filled with happy people on a warm summer evening, many of whom stayed long enough to see the fireflies begin their nightly show. On the day of the wedding, we awoke to hazy skies turning to clouds by noon. The backup for the wedding was a chapel in Lewiston, but the logistics of making the decision and then trying to inform everyone, including many who were driving in, made it impossible. I would not suggest a second location as a backup. It simply doesn’t work, and I have no doubt someone would have been sitting at my house while the wedding took place in Lewiston. So we gave the outcome over to God and went forward. We delayed the beginning of the ceremony a bit, handing out umbrellas, but the worst we got was heavy mist for about 10 minutes, and it was warm. The clouds cleared and sun sparkled through in time for the pictures afterwards, and everyone, including the bride and groom, were very happy. The reception was inside at another location, so all was well. Following the experience of that wedding, my daughter made arrangements for tents both here for the wedding and down by the river for the reception. On the Friday before, we acknowledged the forecast we had hoped to not hear and had them erected, knowing that every forecaster said heavy rain. I cannot stress to you enough the importance of a good tent, a clean tent and having an expert to see to them. These tents had been reserved months before, and yes, we would have had to pay for them even if we didn’t need them, but it was worth it. June 15, 2002 had monsoonlike rains with the coldest

temperatures ever recorded in Maine on that date. What more can I say! Except, everything was absolutely perfect. I also now own a dozen matching umbrellas, should anyone need them. I have to give credit here to the tentmaker — Ken Gurschik of Turner. No man to my knowledge has ever shown more concern over detail anticipating what might happen, spent more time driving in extra stakes and securing things and, when we recognized that the tent sides would have to be down, spent extra hours picking up and installing a special wall to the wedding tent. It had

rounded church-like windows the length of the wall and allowed the largest garden in all its glory to be seen throughout the ceremony. The rain cooperated to a degree and dwindled to a light mist as the wedding party made its way from the house to the tent and ceased totally for a while at the end of the ceremony. This allowed the tent sides to come up for pictures. The specially made plant stands with hanging baskets that were to frame the ceremony site by our waterfall were moved into the tent to frame the ceremony as well, and the waterfall could

still be seen through those lovely windows. Ken also made a wonderful suggestion that turned out to be a Godsend. Knowing that temperatures were supposed to drop, he brought in heaters to the reception tent. Now the trip between cars and the tent was a bit soggy but once inside the guests were warm, happy and well fed. They danced until after midnight and unless you stuck your head outside, you didn’t know it was pouring. That weather however, provided a benefit none of us had considered. Because it kept everyone inside, every-

one visited and laughed and enjoyed each other’s company and many happy memories were made. So, I guess the best I can say is hope for sunshine in your garden but remember that rain not only brings flowers but it can bring its own unexpected blessings — especially on a wedding day. Oh, and by the way, God Bless the Tentmakers. Jody Goodwin writes “Happy Gardening,” a column appearing twice monthly from April to October in the Sunday Sun Journal Living Section.

12 Spring Bridal Guide

Lewiston, Maine, Sunday, January 19, 2003

Two Cultures, One Love

Black Magenta Yellow Cyan

Continued from page 10

At left: The gardens at the Goodwin home prepared for the dinner rehersal overlook their patio.

Garden Calendars Planning a wedding by garden calendars is far preferable to just picking a date. Keep a journal the year before as to when a plant begins to bloom, when it is at its peak and when it is going by. By doing this, you can look at the list and see exactly what should be in bloom at the time of the wedding. If the area where the wedding is to be held is lacking in any particular color or in an abundance of bloom, you can add what is necessary. Lovely gardens, no matter how beautiful, will not overcome spotted and yellowed stretches of lawn. So don’t forget to use a lawn fertilizer the fall before and get fertilizer and broadleaf weed killer on the lawn as well as lime as early in the spring as possible. If it is hot and dry, run sprinklers as often as you possibly can on both the lawns and gardens. In the fall, after the plants have gone into dormancy, trim any large bushes or trees that might interfere with the festivities or look unkempt. Any particularly important plants, like rose bushes that will create large holes if they die, should be mulched in the fall just as a precaution (this would be yet another backup — I am big on backups). One of my biggest backup plans for both weddings was

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Bellow: Ike Goodwin father of the bride, Scott Abbotts the groom, and a friend of the groom, Chris Griffin, make a last minute check on the tents.

Captions for pages 10 & 11 Background photo: Katina (Jae) Murphy and Chris Griffin have photos taken in the garden of the Goodwin home. Clockwise, from top right: • Melissa Post van der Burg, minister, performs the ceremony for Aimee and Scot in front of the tent window that overlooks the garden. • The Goodwin family poses with the Abbotts in front of the garden waterfall. • Aimee and Scott practice their vows at the rehersal. • Ike Goodwin escorts his daugher Aimee from the family home down the aisle under the tent. container plants. Containers of every size and shape were planted as early in the spring as I could get the plants from the nurseries. In the case of our daughter’s wedding, I carried them in and out at night to avoid any possible late frosts because they were all planted by May 1. I also planted my short dahlias in the house on

April 1, and I had dahlias in bloom in the garden for the June 15 event. You can do this with many kinds of plants, including lots of those annuals, if you don’t want to spend the money at the nursery, but it does take time, space and lots of attention. I also did dozens of containers for the July wedding, knowing they could

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Spring Bridal Guide 9

Lewiston, Maine, Sunday, January 19, 2003

By KIA SHANTé REAUX Associated Press Writer

FROM NORWAY, WITH LOVE — Gry Hesselberg, in keeping with Norwegian custom, gave away her son Jorgen at his wedding to Melanie Coffee at the Second Baptist Church in Evanston, Ill. Mother and son wore traditional Norwegian festive dress for the ceremony. (AP Photo/Family photo by Wilbur Coffee)

CHICAGO (AP) – Melanie Coffee and her beau made a vow early in their relationship to dance inside a gazebo every time they ran across one. The tradition started with an impromptu whirl inside a gazebo at a quaint bed and breakfast in rural Missouri. So it was only fitting they danced inside a gazebo the night Jorgen Hesselberg asked Coffee to be his wife two years later. The couple’s journey on a life together began nearly five years ago when both were journalism students at the University of Missouri-Colum-

NORWEGIAN WOOD — Many of the guests at the wedding of Melanie Coffee and Jorgen Hesselberg had traveled from his native Norway, and they brought along a rolling pin to be autographed in Norwegian fashion for the couple. Coffee displays the memento, festooned in ribbon. (AP Photo/Ted Warren) bia – he in broadcast journalism, she in print journalism. As a beginning journalism student, Coffee was assigned to “shadow” Hesselberg for a while. “It felt right from the mo-

Reception Hall be moved to various areas for color should the summer prove to be so hot that things just stopped blooming.

Weather — You Can’t Control It It is only human and we all do it, but you cannot stick your head into the flowers and pretend that it might not rain.

The very best thing you can do is plan for the worst and hope for the best. It is surprising, but in the end, you may find the rain was a blessing. The July wedding we had here and that I worried so over — I shouldn’t have worried. The summer of 2000 was one of those summers that makes everyone pretty unhappy. It Continued on page 13

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ment I first saw her,” Hesselberg, 29, said of his relationship with Coffee. The two became friends, and their companionship blossomed into love. The couple started dating Feb. 10, 1998, and has celebrated every “10th” of the month since. They were engaged on Feb. 10, 2000, and married this past Aug. 10. “Melanie and Jorgen’s wedding was the wonderful union of two families from two very different cultures,” said Fran Coffee, the bride’s mother. Continued on page 14

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10 Spring Bridal Guide

By JODY GOODWIN Sun Journal Gardening Editor

lanning a garden wedding can be described using a variety of adjectives. After having hosted two at my own home, I think the best description is “fun challenge,” but let me be very clear — there are some days when it isn’t fun. In reality, it is just plain hard work that hundreds of people are going to look at — nothing intimidating there! Here is a list of “need to do or need to know” things I will start with and then detail further on in the story. They are: If at all possible, have at least a one-year notice. Plan the date according to your garden, not the calendar. Have backup plans, no matter how optimistic you tend to be.

Lewiston, Maine, Sunday, January 19, 2003

Garden

weddings

Spring Bridal Guide 11

can be fun, even in the rain

A year to plan The first wedding here on the cliffs in Turner was scheduled for July 31, 2000 for our daughter’s best friend, who spent much of her school years with us. The second, our daughter Aimee’s, was June 15, 2002. The first date was chosen before it was scheduled here, so there was no garden input. The second was slated by the garden calendar. They were very different weddings in many ways. My gardens tends to be very lush and dramatic in early summer and much more “cottage garden-like” by the end of July, especially if hot and dry temperatures have prevailed. The July wedding scared me to death. By the end of July, most of the summer flowers have gone by, but the fall flowers have not yet come into their own at my house. The roses are fading, the daisies and lupines are gone, as are the lilacs and weigela. However, the end of July is a good time for all kinds of lilies, the annuals have come into their own and, if you are lucky, some of the dahlias will have started to bloom as have the late astilbes. There is always a trade-off with any date you choose. Select one with the most pluses to it, such as varieties of flowers in bloom, normal weather patterns for that time of year, possible insects. Also take careful notes the year before as to what time of day would be best. Both weddings took place at our house at about 5 p.m. for several reasons. Any earlier in the day and the full force of the southern sun would have roasted everyone. There is usually a breeze at that time to help shoo away black flies and mosquitoes, which don’t usually come out in full force here until about 6 p.m. or after. You can’t know these things unless you sit in the garden at various times during the day and specifically take note of them. Also, with a year’s notice, you can make any changes in the garden the summer before such as planting more of a particular variety you know will be in bloom and make a show at that time. The notice also allows you to plan specific plantings if there is to be an arbor or to surround the ceremony site with special plantings. For both weddings, I went to various nurseries on the specific date one year before. By doing this, I was able to see what plants I might not have that would be good to plant and, in the case of the July wedding, to find some more formal plants to enhance the cottage-like quality that already existed. The nursery trips also provided the opportunity to set-up a backup some of you may want to consider. I remember distinctly when my daughter’s senior pictures were scheduled for my garden. Two days before we had a wind-whipped rain storm, and the gardens showed the effect. We had to search out little undamaged spaces for those pictures. With that memory in mind, I made arrangements with two different nurseries, that should it become necessary, I could rent potted perennials for the weekend. These nurseries were in two different towns away from Turner. My theory being that one wind storm wouldn’t hit three different towns. It is easy enough to send a couple of trucks with caps (talk to your neighbors and friends) to pick up potted plants that are in bloom. You can tuck them behind ferns or other plants to cover the pots, or if necessary, put the pot in the ground and mulch the top so it doesn’t show. Voila! Instant flowers. Although I didn’t have to use the arrangement, the plan made me feel better, just like a security blanket. Knowing a year in advance also lets you spend more time and more effort in the fall when you actually still have time. I spent a great many more hours weeding, pruning and cleaning up, which proved to be a Godsend the following spring when time was at a premium. Continued on page 12

Cover and garden photos by Melissa Bonvini Photography, Portland; background photo, Northlight Portraits, Auburn.