Stellar Day Magazine, October 2015 by Stellar Day Magazine

stellar day Issue 2 | October 2015

IN THE DESERT Jess's personal struggle through loneliness, her ramblings about wandering in the desert and being thankful through it all.

A STORY OF HOPE Hear one of our very own contributors story about her struggle and survival of breast cancer.

HALLOWEEN DIY An exclusive DIY just for YOU exclusively from Christine!

magazine

The

October Issue

sdb table of con tents

04 In The Desert 07 The Best Mac n Cheese 08 DIY Boo Sign 09 A Story of Hope 12 10 Decor Tips by Eric Crook 13 Brianna VanderWeide 17 Workout with Sarah 18 Nine Retreat Recap

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I'M THANKFUL FOR MY STRUGGLE BECAUSE WITHOUT IT I WOULDN'T HAVE STUMBLED ACROSS MY STRENGTH

RAMBLINGS FROM JESS

INÂ THE DESERT By Jessica Williams Photographs of Jess by Jamie Allio Loneliness is a funny thing. It has it's way of creeping in and holding you captive for awhile. Not every day, not all the time. But long enough to remind you that you feel totally and utterly alone. I am just coming out of the longest stretch of loneliness in my life. A season where I could look around me, see all the people in my life, feel blessed and lucky and STILL feel so much loneliness. Like, deep aching for more. I leaned on Jesus a lot during my darker days. Days when other circumstances in my life made it all seem unbearable. I clung to this verse:

"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you." Deuteronomy 31:6

The promises that the Lord is near was my life line on some days. Some days I just felt so sad and I couldn't explain it. And long after the circumstances in my life subsided, I still just felt sad and lonely. It was a long road with mountains and valleys. Short spurts and long, drawn out stretches of being in what felt like the desert. Like a slow moving, never ending, drought that just felt like would last forever. I was tired. I felt hopeless and I cried myself to sleep a lot.

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But what I needed was time. Time to just rely on the Lord, to truly lean on him and to LISTEN. I have heard the Lord whisper "Wait" to me for so long, and I never knew what I was waiting for. But I just knew that I was to wait on him. The bible says:

"But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint." Isaiah 40:31

Waiting through your loneliness can be the hardest thing you'll ever do. It was for me. I cried, I was mad, I clung to my human nature and I vented to the Lord about why I was so frustrated and why it wasn't fair. It's not totally over for me either. BUT, I can say that I am coming out of this season. There's nothing like basking in even the faint light that awaits at the other end of darkness. You would do

Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you." Deuteronomy 31:6

anything to clamor your way out of the hole to feel the warmth on your face. I know how it feels to sit with your loneliness and to wonder when it's going to end. Is it ever going to end?

The truth is, I never was completely alone. And we serve a God who desires to rescue us from the desert. Who longs to save us from the wandering and to use our stories for his glory. He won't keep you there, sweet friend. His love is bigger, greater, and more fierce than anything you could ever imagine. Wait on the Lord, for He is good. And when you are weak, he is strong. There's nothing better than that.

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IN THE KITCHEN WITH JESS

THEÂ BEST MACÂ 'N CHEESE Recipe By That Which Nourishes Photograph by Jess Williams

Ingredients 16 oz of pasta 1/2 C. butter 1/2 C. flour 1 Tbsp salt 1 Tbsp pepper 4 C. milk 6 C. shredded cheddar cheese Directions 1. While the pasta is cooking, melt 1/2 C butter in a large pan over medium heat. 2. Gently pour in flour and whisk together for 2-3 minutes. 3. Add in 1 Tbsp of salt and 1 Tbsp of pepper 4. Slowly pour 4 cups of whole milk into the pan, whisking as you go until it's smooth. 5. Grease a 9x13 dish with butter and add cooking and drained pasta to the dish. 6. Sprinkle 6 cups shredded cheddar cheese over the pasta. 7. Pour the cream sauce over the top of the cheese and allow it to sit a couple of minutes to melt the cheese. 8. Stir it all together 9. Bake in a 325 degree preheated oven for 12-15 minutes. Amazeballs good.

OMG YUM.

NOMADIC

DIY BOO SIGN An adorable and easy craft brought to you by our very own Christine Cram!

This is one of my favorite types of crafts to make. A simple banner sign. You can make this however you want to. This is a perfect craft for Halloween. Here is what you will need: Supplies: ~Banner ~Letters to spell out “BOO” (I purchased these stickers from a local craft store) ~Paint ~A Piece of wood ~Hot glue ~Ribbon or straw ~Scissors I first made the banner. I cut the paper to make the shape shown in the picture. I placed the sticker on each piece of paper to spell out “BOO”. I hole punched each banner piece and fed the straw through each banner piece. I then painted the wood. I chose a yellow. I love yellow. Wait for the paint to dry. I painted one coat on the wood piece. I sanded the sides and corners to give the wood piece a vintage/rustic feel to it. Next dab a little hot glue on the back of the wood and glue the straw that’s attached to the banner onto it. Wait for it to dry. You will want to glue more straw to make a loop to be able to hang the sign. Just simply glue the back of the straw (just like you did with the banner). Wait for it to dry. Then you will be able to hang it. That’s it. That’s all it takes to make your very own banner sign. Perfect in time for the holidays. Have fun!! STELLAR DAY MAGAZINE | 8

HAVE FUN!

A STORY OF HOPE KATE WILLIAMS SHARES THE STORY OF HER PERSONAL STRUGGLE WITH CANCER In lieu of Breast Cancer Awareness month, I wanted to share my story in the hope that it will encourage other women who walk in my shoes and bring awareness to a side of breast cancer most do not know about.

walk through life with us. Her mother (the grandma that I always wished I would have met) also had breast cancer and passed away when my mom was a young girl. Many other women in my family have been diagnosed as well. So, the “high risk” factor was real.

Most people know someone, maybe even really close to them, that have had breast cancer. For many, it is a real threat to their lives and can bring about a lot of fear of the unknown or the future itself. For those women who have had their mom, grandma, aunt or other close relative diagnosed with breast cancer, they wonder if it will happen to them since it has hit so close to home. It can be a frightening reality to many, but I want to encourage those women in that situation - I know how you feel. I have been there. You are not alone.

Not only because so many women on one side had cancer, but also because of the young age when they were diagnosed (many in their 30’s, including my mom). I remember thinking as I grew up, that it was more a matter of “when” not “if” it would happen to me and started being screened when I was 18. But, I also never remember being fearful. I knew God was in control and that He would take care of me. I had total peace in Him. I didn’t want to just sit by and “wait” though.

There is hope. Growing up, I always knew that the risk of breast cancer for me at some point in my life was real. My mom was diagnosed when I was young and had chemo treatments, etc and I thank the Lord every day that He spared her life and has allowed her to

I have always been passionate about nutrition, health and prevention and also believe there is a place for modern medicine. And what an amazing time we live in today with the advances in medical technology and science! As I begun to approach 30 and I was also done having kids, I knew I wanted to take the next step in my cancer prevention. I decided to meet with a genetic counselor last spring and get tested for any breast cancer genes.

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"I got the call, and the results were positive."

We waited about 4 weeks for the results. In the meantime, I did some research and found that one of the best surgeons in the US for breast reconstruction was in DC. He does all the latest techniques, works with one of the best mastectomy surgeons and also teaches other surgeons at Georgetown how to do the new techniques (things like skin sparing, nipple sparing, small incisions, rapid expansion, mastectomy & reconstruction at the same time, etc). I wanted to know all my options and met with him; if I was going to go thru with it, I wanted the best of the best surgeon. During those 4 weeks, I remember a lot of people asking me what I would do if the test came back positive or if I was scared and did I really want to know? You know, I never worried about it. Again, the peace of God was felt throughout the process and I knew it was

going to be ok. No matter what the results were. I got the call, and the results were positive. I was a carrier of the ATM gene (a rarer gene than BRCA like Angelina Jolie had but also not a gene I needed to worry about my ovaries with). To be honest, it was a relief that it was positive. Why? Because now I could do something about it. I called my surgeon and we decided to go forward with surgery. I was going to have a double mastectomy to eliminate all breast tissue and full reconstruction (...but who doesn’t want something new after breastfeeding 3 kids? ;)). Since we were on a tight schedule only being in DC for a little time, the initial surgery was scheduled for a few days later so everything happened rather quickly. The stories I could tell about how every little detail fell into place from the timing, the surgeons, techniques, insurance, help with the kids, my mom coming out, my husband having the time off work, etc are endless and truly show how God’s hand was directing and in control thru the entire process. I remember right before the first surgery, the nurse came into my room and talked me thru everything, encouraged me and then said she was proud of me. To be honest, at first I thought that was a weird comment. I hadn’t been diagnosed with breast cancer. You should be proud of all the other women that have had to go thru more than I ever will! I didn’t know how to take it and thought, well of course I am doing surgery. Why would I not? I didn’t think there was a downside. With tears in her eyes (and soon mine), she said, “You are a survivor. Even though you were never diagnosed, you will forever be a part of the club. You are a Previvor.” A term that I had never heard before, but have since wanted to encourage other women with. You can do it! Your family history or other risk factors do not have to be daunting or fearful. You can do something about it. Surgery may not be for everyone; it may not be for you and it is a personal choice, not to be taken lightly. And that is ok. But, I want women to know they have a choice. They can take control of their own health and fight for themselves. Whether that be surgery, to wait, nutrition, medicine or anything else. There are amazing resources and encouragement and help for you.

For me, surgery was my choice. It was a choice I made not only for myself, but one for my daughters. I want them to be strong. To know that they do not have to live in fear since they are also at risk of carrying the gene, but they can trust in the Lord and know there are options and medical solutions available to them, if they want. The entire process of surgery and healing took just over 3 months and everything was completed, for me. From the first surgery to complete healing, I could not be more thankful. Thankful for the life ahead, for the Lord’s hand, for my families encouragement, my husbands love and support, my mom’s courage and my children’s hope.

Note - I am not a doctor and the decisions that I made regarding my risks were my own and may not be for everyone. However, I would love to encourage you and if you have any questions at all about the breast cancer prevention, the risk factors or a detailed account of everything that the surgery and recovery entail, I am more than happy to talk and listen to you or answer any questions that you have! You can email me at: kate.williams@mac.com with any questions, anytime.

"For me, surgery was my choice. It was a choice I made t not only for myself, but one for my daughters." STELLAR DAY MAGAZINE

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ERIC’S 10 TIPS FOR A STUNNING LIVING ROOM by Eric Crook

(or any room!)

START SNIPPING Create a folder with cut out magazine photos of rooms that you love.

LISTS LISTS LISTS Make a list from the photos such as rug, sofa, pillows etc.

WINDOW SHOPPING Take the folder with you every time you are out shopping for new items for your home.

STICK TO IT No matter what, stick to the list/folder of inspiration!

WORTH THE WAIT If it’s on sale and it doesn’t speak to your photos, do not buy it. You may pass up a good deal, but it could be the difference of having a piece of furniture that was a steal and a room that you truly love. Maybe if you wait, the right piece may be both on sale and in your inspiration folder pictures.

LOVE WHERE YOU SIT Save your pennies and buy quality upholstery. I can’t say it enough. The place you sit the most should be the best you can afford. Especially if you love it!

PENNY PINCHING Save on end tables, coffee tables and accessories. With so many knock off versions of everything out there, this is where you can truly pinch your pennies.

Eric Crook is a Scottsdale interior designer and the owner of Eric Crook Design. He specializes in both commercial and residential interiors.

LIGHTEN UP Make sure you always have multiple lighting in your photo inspiration. A ceiling light fixture, side table lamps, or a swell floor lamp or two. Lighting that is near the face level makes everyone look and feel much better than harsh overhead lighting.

DIMMERS Replace all your regular switches for dimmers. Nothing sets a beautiful space off more than perfect lighting. Plus if you are having people over last minute and didn’t have time to clean well, dim lighting hides dust and dirt.

FRAGRANCE Buy quality scented candles. Typically, as with fragrance you wear, candles that cost more have longer lasting quality scents. Pick a signature scent and stick with it throughout the home. (no food scents!)

GRATITUDE & THANKFULNESS And the difference between the two By Brianna VanderWeide Luke 7:36-50 (The Message), One of the Pharisees asked him over for a meal. He went to the Pharisee’s house and sat down at the dinner table. Just then a woman of the village, the town harlot, having learned that Jesus was a guest in the home of the Pharisee, came with a bottle of very expensive perfume and stood at his feet, weeping, raining tears on his feet. Letting down her hair, she dried his feet, kissed them, and anointed them with the perfume. When the Pharisee who had invited him saw this, he said to himself, “If this man was the prophet I thought he was, he would have known what kind of woman this is who is falling all over him.” Jesus said to him, “Simon, I have something to tell you.”

“That’s right,” said Jesus. Then turning to the woman, but speaking to Simon, he said, “Do you see this woman? I came to your home; you provided no water for my feet, but she rained tears on my feet and dried them with her hair. You gave me no greeting, but from the time I arrived she hasn’t quit kissing my feet. You provided nothing for freshening up, but she has soothed my feet with perfume. Impressive, isn’t it? She was forgiven many, many sins, and so she is very, very grateful. If the forgiveness is minimal, the gratitude is minimal.” Then he spoke to her: “I forgive your sins.” That set the dinner guests talking behind his back: “Who does he think he is, forgiving sins!” He ignored them and said to the woman, “Your faith has saved you. Go in peace.”

“Oh? Tell me.” “Two men were in debt to a banker. One owed five hundred silver pieces, the other fifty. Neither of them could pay up, and so the banker canceled both debts. Which of the two would be more grateful?” Simon answered, “I suppose the one who was forgiven the most.”

I have always loved this scripture. How can you not? Look at the scene: the beauty of a sinful woman who made herself low to bow before Jesus in a room full of glaring, judging men. She was deemed foolish but she didn’t care. She had to show Jesus her understanding of who He was. She got it. She saw Him in faith. And she saw what that meant for her personally.

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There have been a lot of debates between theologians as to who she was, but after much study, I have concluded that maybe we don’t need to know. Maybe the fact that she was referred to as a sinner and a harlot allows us to insert our names and our lives for hers in this story.

Henri Frederic Amiel said it perfectly,

What I do think is important is this word that struck me for the first time ever as I was re-reading this passage this week.

So gratitude is when our hearts respond to the thankfulness that we have experienced. And I love that the word relief is used in the definition of thankfulness. Because when we know Jesus as He is and we discover who we get to become because of Him, aren’t we relieved? Relieved because He is our Savior and He loves us. Relieved that we don’t have to believe the lies anymore. Relieved that life is more than this temporary journey on earth. Relieved that Jesus in His perfection made it so we don’t have to be perfect.

She is “very, very grateful.” We often use the words thankfulness and gratitude interchangeably. But I began to study them separately. And they aren’t the same. Here’s the difference: Thankfulness is when we feel pleased and relieved. Gratitude is a quality of being thankful; a readiness for us to show appreciation for and to return the kindness that has been given to us. Henri Frederic Amiel said it perfectly, Thankfulness is the beginning of gratitude. Gratitude is the completion of thankfulness. Thankfulness may consist merely of words. Gratitude is shown in acts. So gratitude is when our hearts respond to the thankfulness that we have experienced. And I love that the word relief is used in the definition of thankfulness. Because when we know Jesus as He is and we discover who we get to become because of Him, aren’t we relieved?

Thankfulness is the beginning of gratitude. Gratitude is the completion of thankfulness. Thankfulness may consist merely of words. Gratitude is shown in acts.

I think the difference between these words is simply this: we need to breathe in our lives with thankfulness. But then we need to breathe out our lives with gratitude. We breathe out our lives by giving up our whole hearts to Jesus and His purpose. Hearts that are so empowered and excited by what He has done, that we must return His loving kindness. We must praise him like we need our next breath. We must obey Him in order to breathe fully. We must serve His heart and love His people to live with spiritual lungs of full capacity. Scripture says it is “His kindness that leads us to repentance.” (Romans 2:4) So the sinful woman in the story of Luke responded to Jesus and His kindness, and then she repented of her sins with her actions.

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Because she was so very grateful. Gratitude really is a call to action from thankfulness. I think we have become thankful Christians but not always grateful ones. I think complacency sets in because we are so incredibly blessed that we take for granted what we have, both in the material and the spiritual. We forget what we are thankful for. All around me, people need relief both materially and spiritually. And I can provide them with the truth of the Gospel and share how Jesus can provide for both of these needs because of what I have seen Him do for me. I can give of my time, talents and treasures to bless others and this can be used by God to direct their attention to His perfect kindness and lead them to repentance. This is our purpose as believers. To point to Him. To show appreciation. Return kindness. This is the grateful response to a heart that is thankful for what God has done. In this story, the woman who washed Jesus’ feet with her precious perfume, did so because she was overwhelmed with gratitude. She couldn’t just look Him in the eyes, shake His hand and say, “thanks for what you have done for me today, my Lord,” and walk away. She had to show Him how she felt about His presence. She had to show Him what He meant to her. She had to reveal how relieved her heart was to know Her Savior and see Him face to face. Because those who have been forgiven much, love much. Their thankfulness is contagious in action. I want to be like this woman, don’t you? The kind of woman who makes people stop in their tracks and say, “why is ‘this kind of woman falling all over Jesus?’” We can do this when we embrace her story as our own. We place our names in this Scripture for hers. The harlot. The sinner. The one granted forgiveness from the Savior Himself. And we respond to Him with our hands wide open, our lives fully available, and our lips pressed against His feet, breaking open what is most precious to us and pouring it all over His throne.

"Brianna was forgiven many, many sins and so she is very, very grateful."

No Bake Balls 1 C Old Fashioned Oats 1/2 C Peanut Butter 1/2 C Chocolate Chips 1/3 C Honey 1 Teaspoon Vanilla Extract

Stir all the ingredients together in a bowl until mixed. Cover and let chill for 30 minutes. After chilled, roll into balls. EAT UP!!

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WORKOUT WITH SARAH

5 Tips to Maximize Your Workout

These are some of my favorite ways to get the most out of every workout. We don’t always have time to spend 2 hours in the gym or even our 30 minutes at home, but if we are capitalizing on the time we are there, we are going to have a bigger impact in the end. Which area are you the weakest in? That would be my first suggestion of where to start. Picking attainable goals is key, so chose one thing this week to do differently. 1. Cardio, cardio, cardio Well, sort of. Cardio is always the place we turn to first because it burns so many calories, and we really FEEL like we are getting the best workout, right? While it’s important, try cutting your “purecardio” down to 3 days a week. This will give you the freedom to incorporate other forms of exercise that keep your body flexible, stronger and ready to react faster in any situation. 2. Mix Strength Training With Cardio Moves Muscle burns more fat and in effect helps us tone down faster. If you have a hard time cutting out all of the cardio, try a cardio circuit that incorporates strength training. Think of it as interval training between the two. One minute of a strength exercise, like squats; and one minute of cardio, like high-knees. 3. Form over function Focusing on your form will consistently push your workouts to the edge of what you are capable of. There is always one muscle, or more often several that don’t want to cooperate. Focusing on executing any move while correcting one specific area will make it more intense and actually give you faster results.

It propels you forward and you become stronger each time as that one muscle masters the move and you are able to focus on another muscle group. 4. Mix it up. Maybe you fell in love with the workout you are currently doing because you got such great results from it when you started. However, there hasn’t been any progress lately even though you are doing everything right like you were when you started. Welcome to the plateau. We need to keep our bodies guessing in order for them to keep responding. Choosing a different workout is one way to kick-start that process. Usually, we consider 90 days the amount of time it takes to really master something. So, if you’ve been at something at least that long, try something really out of the norm for yourself. And hey, you may even find a new workout you love! 5. Dial into what drives you Before even pulling out your gym clothes and putting them on, take a minute and think about why you are going to workout. What is that thing you are working for? Why does THIS workout matter? How will you feel when you are done? Really meditate on those things, and then go after that exercise. Chances are, your brain will be more willing to stay in the workout if it’s been given a good enough reason to keep going. Sarah is a coach with Beachbody and is passionate about encouraging women in their lives. To inquire with her, please visit her website at http://www.beachbodycoach.co m/esuite/home/sarahcosta

NINE RETREAT A recap by Jess Williams Photo by Kimberly Goeman

ine was a retreat that I had been looking forward to for months. My dear friend Kym Ventola had been dreaming about it and mentioning it for so long that by the time she released the details, it wasn't really something I had to think too long about. I was just IN.

What I found instead was one of the most incredible weeks of my life. Suddenly, I felt like I was surrounded by women who 'got' me. Women who SAW me. New friends who were willing to listen and who really heard me. I sat in awe of these women, heard their stories, listened to advice, laughed, cried, and ate the most marvelous food.

Embarking on the weekend, I knew I wouldn't know too many people. I knew I'd be out of my comfort zone and with women I hardly knew. But I was ready for it. I had just started coming out of a dark season of sadness in my life and was optimistic about how Nine would refresh my soul.

Nine is a retreat for women who need encouragement, refreshment, rejuvenation and support. All the women who were there, NEEDED it. We rode bikes along the boardwalk, we did yoga on the roof top, we listened to amazing speakers who encouraged and championed us to find our story and speak our truth. We were moved to tears together and laughed until our sides ached.

We came from all walks of life and at the end of the day we found something none of us were expecting. Friendships. Sisterhood. And a life long connection as women, mothers, business professionals, and entrepreneurs. I honestly can't fully explain all that I took away from NINE. I just know that everyone needs to be there.

Nine is the epitome of refreshment and a time away together as women to recenter our souls.

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SUBSCRIBE & BE ENCOURAGED. Don't miss out on any issue of Stellar Day Magazine. Inspiration awaits. WWW.STELLARDAYBLOG.COM

Special Thanks. Editor in Chief Jess Williams Columnists Sarah Costa, Kate Williams, Christine Cram, Brianna VanderWeide, Eric Crook Contributors Christine Cram, Sarah Trapp, Kate Williams, Sarah Costa, Esther Gallagher, Robyn Baldwin Recipes Provided By That Which Nourishes and Beachbody Designer Eric Crook Photos of Jess by Jamie Allio Events Nine Retreat Without any of you, this wouldn't be possible. This little dream of mine from blog turned magazine is a wild ride and I'm excited for the future. It's more important to surround yourself with people who believe in you, and that's what I've found in all of you. Thank you, truly, thank you.

You All Rock. www.stellardayblog.com

EDITOR'S NOTE

Jess Williams EDITOR-IN-CHIEF I had a little dream to start a blog in 2009. I wrote for years and years, and kept dreaming. THEN. My dreaming started turning into realities and women whom I love and trust started coming out of the woodworks to write and blog with me. Which was the most humbling of them all. Through all this writing came the idea to start a magazine to encourage and inspire women. So much of what we read, watch and look at makes us subconsciously feel like we are worth less than what we truly are. Like we are screwing everything up and like we aren't adequate enough. And maybe it doesn't make us feel like that in the moment, but as we move through our days and evaluate our actual lives, we feel like we are less than. And it's all lies. I desperately want to change that. I want to create a space for women to come and leave feeling inspired, encouraged and championed in their own lives. To be lifted up and reminded that we are all beautiful and bring amazing things to the table. Our lives will all look different from the next. But that's the beauty in it all. There's beauty in it all.

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